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funky-lady · 2 years

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Credit for the cover goes to @snapp-art :D

The Dreamslayer

The Boatem Crew Boards The Dream Cruise Ship

Distracted by the impending duel, Dream curses his lapse in attention when it turns out to be his downfall, as he quickly finds out when a swarm of vexes creeps up on him, and a crossbow bolt imbeds itself into his stomach as soon as he starts fighting them.

He reaches for the healing potions in his inventory, only to realize he’s run out of anything that could help.

A second arrow hits its mark as soon as he collapses to the ground, feeling dizzy and nauseous.

The one who’s taken him down finally deigns to show himself.

He lands next to him, quickly drinking some milk to counter the effects of the slow falling potion he just drank.

Dream immediately recognizes him.

Grian.

Of course it would be him.

A Wither skull helm covering the upper half of his face, the avian’s lips are twisted into a maniacal smirk. An ominous waltz of light and shadows cast across his face by the tell tale glow of enchantments on his netherite armour sharpens his features. Strapped to his hip is a spyglass that has seen better days and a netherite sword with a purple crystal embedded into its gleaming pommel. Two more Wither skulls have been incorporated into the design of the man’s armour, encasing his shoulders protectively.

The man’s wings are spread out behind him in a show of power and intimidation and he keeps his enchanted crossbow trained on him, daring him to make a single move.

“Well, well, well, look who got trapped in my dreamcatcher…”

Dream glares up at the figure standing above him victoriously, pressing a desperate hand against the wound on his stomach, trying to staunch the bleeding. “How did you know?”

Grian tilts his head to the side in feigned confusion. “Whatever do you mean, Dream~?”

He grits his teeth. “You know damn well what I’m fucking talking about! Who the hell told you about my plans, you–”

He trails off in shock when Puffy steps into his field of vision, a resolute look on her face even as she fidgets visibly.

“No… Puffy… how could you?”

“I’m sorry, Dream, I really am, but you’ve really gone too far this time. It had to be done. You’re no longer the duckling I knew and loved.”

He opens his mouth to retort, but before he can get a word out, Niki tackles the sheep hybrid to the ground, an arrow flying above their prone forms.

“Are you alright?” Mutters Niki, pulling away to make sure her partner is alright. She relaxes when Puffy nods with a slight smile, rising to her feet and dusting off her coat.

“It’s sad that I should’ve expected this.”

Puffy twists around, spotting Bad standing on a cliff above her, his bow aimed straight at her.

“I’m going to give you one last chance, Puffy. Side with us now or face the consequences.”

“No. I won’t. I’m a Hermit now, and they have my unfailing loyalty. Niki and I will be leaving for Hermitcraft with them.”

Bad’s face falls, twisting into one of bitter anger.

“You’ve made a mistake, Puffy. A fatal one. You should’ve stayed loyal to the Eggpire. I’m going to have to kill you for betraying the Egg.”

Puffy pulls out her sword, face blank and solemn. “My choice is made. But I won’t be dying tonight. The Hermits have my back, and I will fight with everything I have to keep what my life has become.”

It’s all it takes for Bad to snap, and move to attack her, but she meets him head-on, swiftly joined by Niki and Jack, who joined Boatem mainly because Grian terrified him with a single look after he dared utter a swear in his presence.

Dream’s face twists into a pained grimace as the crossbow bolt sticking out of his chest shifts as he draws a breath that is deeper than it should.

The bolt tipped with poison, he can easily tell by the unfortunately very familiar sensation of the deadly potion quickly and painfully crawling through his veins, invading his system and making him feel nauseous, weak and dizzy, adding onto the effects of the weakness potion tipped bolt piercing his left leg, pinning it to the floor.

He struggles to get to his feet, but it doesn’t matter.

Even if he did manage to stand up, he wouldn’t be able to escape.

Flanking his opponent’s on both sides are two Boatem Members who are using their powers to cut off his escape routes.

On the avian’s right is a tall man whose firework launcher is trained on him with steady hands, with an i etched into his netherite chest plate and three wither skulls incorporated to his armour, following the same design as Grian. He seems to be commanding the small army of withers that surrounds him from all sides.

A man with high-tech braces supporting his legs looms over his fallen form ominously on Grian’s left, a tall top hat perched precariously on his head. His eyes are glowing a cold blue-grey as he summons yet another batch of vexes that move into position swiftly, effectively cutting off his remaining escape routes.

He stops struggling when mycelium roots crawl out of the ground and start wrapping themselves around his limbs, looking up at Grian when the avian chuckles at his predicament.

“No!! How? How the fuck did I lose? I’m the admin of this world! I’m the one in charge here! I’m the God of this server! Not you!” He growls venomously.

Grian huffs out a cold laugh, and the parrot wings that are spread behind him, showing off the avian’s truly impressive wingspan, twitch in a way that betrays the extent of Grian’s maniacal amusement.

“A God? You dare call yourself a god, Dream? Oh, how can you be so naive? So recklessly arrogant?” Grian trails off with a terrifying kind of darkness lurking around the edges of his voice, reloading his crossbow in one smooth, nonchalant movement. “I don’t think I’ve introduced myself yet, have I? I’m Grian, the War Watcher.”

Dread pools in Dream’s gut as he stiffens despite the fact that it makes his whole body screaming in agony, eyes widening in fear and disbelief behind his cracked mask.

A Watcher.

He picked a fight with a goddamn Watcher.

One of the three entities whose powers and influence are as close to divine in nature as it can get, short of being an actual god.

This is it.

This is where he dies.

He’s fucked.

And yet… he can’t resign himself to his fate.

He’s supposed to be in control.

Before Boatem showed up, he had everything planned to the letter, the pieces of the puzzle falling into place obediently.

Now everything has changed.

His Tommy is nowhere to be found, Techno tried to kill him as soon as he set a foot outside Pandora’s vault, Quackity and Sam did not die his hand and Punz was killed by the crystals.

Nothing is going according to plan.

He’s supposed to be unbeatable.

Impossible to kill.

Immortal.

The only god on this server.

Not… this.

This pathetic victim, immobilized by potions and mushroom roots.

Dream’s jaw tightens as he glares at the Watcher through the crack almost splitting his beloved mask in two.

He’s still alive.

He can still get out of this alive.

He will survive this.

He has a wild card.

Dream closes his eyes as he mentally calls upon XD, and feels his panic levels rising when he discovers his connection to the deity is null and void, almost as if– “Don’t bother calling XD for help.” Drawls the parrot avian, sounding so fucking smug Dream would gladly throttle him if he could just fucking move… “Your patron god was so weak that he was no match against the wrath of three divinities and one very pissed off watcher.”

“You’re the ones who killed XD!” He hears George gasp in outrage from behind a nearby boulder. “I’ll kill you!”

Dream frowns, when the hell did George get here? He has nothing to do with this fight!

Pulling away from his fight with Phil, George charges straight at Grian, a netherite axe held above his head and a dangerous glint in his eyes that would make any sane person wary.

George never even gets a chance to get close to the avian.

A woman with a silver moon-themed crown elegantly braided into her long pale brown hair, who leaps from her perch on a nearby rooftop with a graceful flap of her hypnotizing void-like wings that has her gliding towards the ground upon which she lands with ethereal grace. With a show of brute strength that is way above the norm, the woman effortlessly restrains his once best friend with a gleaming netherite sword, the small gold clock embedded into the pommel catching in the bright flash of light resulting from a nearby end crystal explosion. Eyes wild with hate, George bares his teeth, trying in vain to kick and elbow any part of his captor’s body he can reach, but the woman keeps her calm composure and evades his blows with effortless grace, her strength becoming inhuman as she tightens her hold, eyes glowing red.

“No!! What the hell?! I have to kill him, don’t you understand? Let me go! Let me go right now or I swear to Notch I’ll fucking kill you!”

Pearl lets out an exasperated sigh. “Don’t move, I am warning you only this once. I do not take kindly to people attacking my friends.”

Realizing that struggling is pointless, George slumps in defeat.

It’s only then that what Grian said hits Dream.

Did the man really say he knew three gods? Three?! The Watcher has that many gods on his side?! How?

What kind of server does he come from that has not one, but three gods on it?

Pure, raw fear shoots through his veins like lava and he forces himself not to tremble in terror.

“You can’t kill me! You’re not allowed to! No one can kill me! I’m not supposed to die, not now, not ever! That’s not how it’s supposed to end–”

His protests is mercilessly cut off by a condescending chuckle that slices through the sound of George angry struggling in the background. Said sounds blend with the Wither and Vex screeches filling the air, and the maniacal laughter as a moustached man with blood red wings that look like they are made out of floating redstone chunks goes on a rampage, the distinctive sound of end crystal explosion following in his wake.

“Oh Dream… don’t you get it yet?”

Grian turns on his heel and walks away from him, leaving him broken and slowly bleeding out as he lays crumpled on the ground. Glancing back to shoot him a dismissive look as he shoulders his crossbow, the Watcher gives him a cheeky salute, a wide smirk twisting his lips. His eyes glint a cold purple behind his Wither skull helm as the Watcher locks gazes with him one last time.

“It was always meant to be.”

@pinkpuffballdude @call-me-dj

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funky-lady · 2 years

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Move to Boatem!

The Boatem Crew Boards The Dream Cruise Ship

A/N: This takes place after The Blood God, On Vacation, and before The Dreamslayer Arc

Phil paces in front of the door, wings tense with febrile anxiety, twitching in a way that betrays how impatient and worried he is, especially when paired with the somber frown marring his face.

The crows perched all over his home have long since given up on calming him down, staring at him with worry.

He ignores them, more worried about his best friend than Chat, as much as he usually appreciates their presence.

Techno went to visit Dream a week ago.

He hasn’t come back.

There’s still no word of, or from, him.

Slamming his hand against the door frame in frustration, he grits his teeth in pain.

“Woah! Phil! Are you alright?”

He looks up to see Scar and Grian standing on his doorstep, watching him with wide worried eyes through his front door, that he left open to be able to keep an eye on his surroundings.

He clears his throat, massaging his sore knuckles and wrapping his wings around his body as he realizes for the first time how cold his little home has gotten, the cold biting wind of the tundra darting through his open door.

“… yeah. Just worried is all. I haven’t heard from Techno in a week.”

Grian hums, pulling Scar inside and shutting the door before heading straight for one of his furnaces and getting to work on lighting it.

“Man it’s cold in here! You’ve got to take better care of yourself, Phil.”

He nods in agreement and heaves a heavy sigh, collapsing in the armchair closest to the fireplace.

“I know. It’s just… Techno went to visit Dream in the prison. There’s so many things that could’ve gone wrong.”

Scar pulls a thick blanket from a shulker box and carefully wraps it around his shoulders. Phil looks up at him in surprise, a warm smile blooming on his face similarly to the warmth spreading inside his chest. He tugs the blanket closer, noticing how it’s clearly hand-made. Running a hand across the blanket, he gets a good feel of the incredible softness of the fleece blanket.

“Hm… that does sound worrying. Luckily for you, Boatem can help you! Free of charge, as you are a good friend of the company!”

Already, he feels warmer than he did moments ago, the sensation drawing a pleased sigh out of him. He relaxes back into his chair and basks in the slight amount of heat produced by the fire Grian managed to start in the furnace.

Pondering on Scar’s offer, a deep frown etches itself into the skin of his forehead in his worry.

“Really? How? The security around Pandora’s Vault is as tight as it can get!”

“Oh I know that… unfortunately for him, the security the Warden put in place around his little prison only counters the conventional kind of unconventional methods one can use to infiltrate a prison. Unfortunately for him, Sam will never be able to expect the level of chaos and weirdness that is a common day occurrence in Boatem.”

“Right… So what’s the plan?”

Scar gives him a secretive smirk. “Don’t freak out, my friend. That’s the first step.”

“Wha–”

He flinches back as vex screeches fill the room, Scar’s eyes glowing silver as a swarm of vexes spawn around him.

He cups one with both of his scarred hands, engaging in a screeched conversation with the small creature.

A few minutes later it flies away, phasing through spruce walls of his cabin and heading in the direction of the prison.

He doesn’t even want to ask.

“This is a recognition mission, mind you. I don’t think going any further than that would be wise. The last thing we need is for Dream to escape.”

“Yeah. Yeah. I get it. This is already more than enough. Thanks.” He sighs in exhausted resignation, giving the man a small thankful nod.

Scar gives him an acknowledging nod and they settle to wait in silence for the vex to return.

A second screeched conversation ensues following the small winged demon’s return.

“Bad news, Phil. Techno got trapped inside Dream’s cell. It also looks like Sam and Quackity are getting desperate for information about it. And with the moon getting bigger ever since our arrival and Boatem nearly ruining the server’s economy, I’m afraid they might do something drastic soon. Something along the lines of hurting you to force Techno to spill the beans and vice-versa.”

Phil buries his head in his hands with a shaky exhale, the crow perched on his shoulder grooming his hair soothingly. The avian almost gives into his instincts that are screaming at him to lean into the touch.

“Shit. This is bad…”

Grian is poking at the fire thoughtfully when he recovers enough to look up. Phil feels his limbs relax as the temperature inside the cabin becomes a lot more bearable. The uncontrollable shaking raking through them subsiding while his wing unfurl. They stretch out with a few very satisfying pops, happy to finally be able to move about after being wrapped around him for the past ten minutes or so in an effort to keep him warm.

“You know, you’re always welcome to move into Boatem Territory if you want, Philza. I know this place isn’t exactly as safe as it used to be.”

Phil looks around the place he’s called home for years, and finds that, true to Grian’s word, while he is attached to the Arctic Commune, it hasn’t felt safe in a while, ever since Dream started showing up on his and Techno’s doorstep unannounced at any time of the day or night.

He can’t stay here, Phil suddenly realizes with heart-breaking clarity. He swallows thickly, looking around his soon-to-be left behind home as he nods slowly.

“Yeah… yeah. I think I’ll take you up on your offer, actually. Mind if Ranboo comes along?”

The parrot avian beams at him, looking entirely too pleased with his answer for all the good reasons.

“Not at all! Let’s get moving then, shall we?”

A/N : a rough timeline can be found here :D

@call-me-dj

#hermitcraft #dream smp #boatem crew #philza #grian #technoblade #goodtimeswithscar #vex goodtimeswithscar #quackity #awesamdude #pandora’s vault #philza chat #philza crows #winged philza #dream #the visitor #the boatem crew joins the dream cruise ship au #ranboo #hc x dsmp

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funky-lady · 2 years

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Boatem’s Bloodlust

The Boatem Crew Boards The Dream Cruise Ship AU

It’s like a flick has been switched.

Suddenly the Boatem crew is on high alert, thinking on best ways to stay safe and defend themselves if need be.

Mumbo’s mind starts whirling with designs upon designs of traps and weapons and defensive measure to set up around the canyon, just in case. His fingers are itching to grab a pickaxe and start grinding for obsidian in between building ghast and enderman farms. If there’s a chance that Boatem – if his friends – are in danger, then he needs to stock up on end crystals. One thing’s for sure, if push comes to shove, then he won’t hesitate to drop the Peace, Love and Plants philosophy as a whole in a heartbeat. If anyone even thinks about threatening his friend – his family – he’ll show them why the Blood God is feared and revered by thousands all over the server network.

Sat next to Boatem’s very own CEO, resident Spruce Wayne, Patate Man and unofficial eye candy, also known as Mumbo Kills-A-Lot Jumbo, Impulse frowns, unnerved with the possibility of their presence being discovered so soon. Designs of creeper and wither farms flash through his mind as he nods resolutely and decides that at the first sign of danger, he will gladly show this server why the Boomers were one of the most feared groups on the Hermitcraft server last season.

He and Grian might’ve been hippies in the past, but if push comes to shove, he’s sure his chaos loving friend wouldn’t be opposed to unleashing a Wither or two in self-defence… Grian is the War Watcher after all and it’s not like they haven’t done it before. He knows Mumbo would absolutely be on board with it as well. If he thinks he’s fooled anyone with the Peace, Love and Plants thing he has going on, he’s mistaken. Everyone in Boatem the strain he is under by denying a fundamental part of himself nature like that.

Pearl fiddles with the clock Bdubs told her to keep after the Castle Heist, more than ready to curse this server with eternal night at first sign of provocation. She won’t let them hurt her brother, or any of her friends. The remnants bloodlust that came with the boogey curse make a swift return. It’s a side effect of being the last boogeyman that, according to Doc, she’ll always have to deal with in one way or another. Though the hold the curse has on her might weaken with time, from now on there’s always going to be a part of her that will long for blood, death and violence.

BloodMoon, as Gem had helped name it, or rather her, is her very own helsmit, living in the deepest recesses of her mind, ready to rise up to the call whenever she feels in danger or angry.

Distracted by her bloodthirsty thoughts, Pearl doesn’t notice Impulse’s subtle flinch at the sight of the clock, but Grian does, and he wraps a wing around his friend. Impulse shoots him a thankful smile, relaxing slightly and turning his attention back to the matter at hand.

Scar straightens from his lazy yet graceful slouch. His gaze hardens and his eyes, cold and calculating chips of emerald, start glowing with Vex magic in the shadow cast by the rim of his top hat. He might hate the way he got his powers and everything he was forced to do while contracted to the Vex, but he will gladly use it if it means keeping his friends safe. Besides, he spent the entirety of season seven dealing with that bag of Convex trauma with the Jungle Gang’s help. He’s doing a lot better now.

He can fight. He can give it his all.

They all will.

@pinkpuffballdude @call-me-dj

#hermitcraft #dsmp #last life smp #boatem crew #boatem inc #hc x dsmp #3rd life smp #hc x 3rdlife #watcher grian #shapeshifter mumbo #pearlescentmoon #impulsesv #goodtimeswithscar #the boomers #l’manhole #ceo mumbo jumbo #mumbo k jumbo #mcyt #the boatem crew joins the dream cruise ship au

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funky-lady · 2 years

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The Void stared back

The Boatem Crew Boards The Dream Cruise Ship

Eventually Phil recovers enough that he’s able to move on from dealing with his trauma to focus instead on worrying about his friends’ definition of what the word safe means.

“Grian. Scar. Can you please tell me why the hell you ever thought it would be a good idea to dig a hole that’s literally bottomless and then settle anywhere in its vicinity? Not only that, but doing that kind of shit not once, but notchdamn twice?!”

Scar shifts awkwardly, fiddling with the brim of his hat sheepishly. “Well, in my defence, it was Grian’s idea–”

“I gathered, yeah. He’s the only one insane enough to suggest that kind of dangerous shit.” Philza can’t help but interrupt the man with an exasperated chuckle.

“–and Impulse was the one who enabled him by agreeing to build his bedrock breaking machine.”

Phil pins Scar with a royally unimpressed stare until the terraformer’s fidgeting worsened a considerable amount.

“What?! Boatem members love to live dangerously and the hole can serve as a sacrificial pit if we ever need one. It’s completely safe, the only thing at risk are our items!”

Ranboo snorts distractedly, and Phil startles at the noise, having genuinely forgotten about his friend’s presence for a moment, because of how silent the half-enderman has been since the beginning of the conversation.

He frowns in worry when he notices the way his friend seems almost entranced by the void, staring over the edge of the hole with a level of intensity that can’t be healthy.

“Ranboo? Ranboo? Can you hear me?”

“Hm? Woah… yeah, um, sorry, really spaced out just now. This feels like waking up after enderwalking for a while. I could barely make out what you were saying.” Ranboo shakes his head as if to shake off his stupor, his bi-coloured hair falling in front of his face with the jerky mouvements.

Phil frowns, unable to hide his worry. “Are you alright? Do you think you can tell us what happened exactly?”

A/N : a master list for this au that acts as a rough timeline can be found here :D

@call-me-dj

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