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#the clients through the years were all amazing and helped my growth as an artist do I'm forever grateful for that 🖤
eldrtchmn · 4 months
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...3, 2, 1 personal rant incoming
(it's depressing I'm sorry)
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lord0f · 4 months
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My art vs artist this year! Its honestly been a…really rough year. I moved, I got covid (on my BIRTHDAY), I lost my car…Every time I thought things were going to finally calm down and level out they just, didn’t. I’ve been almost constantly overwhelmed, stuck, and feeling like I’m not moving fast enough to keep up with anything. I’m honestly not very happy with where my art is at right now. I feel stagnated and frustrated and the Big Seasonal Sad is hitting especially hard this year, which is not making me feel very positive or hopeful about improving in the next year.
But I know that I will. It was, frankly, a kind of terrible year. But good things happened as well. I am studying a new language and have been regularly attending lessons, the new place I moved has a balcony I enjoy sitting on when the weather is nice, I know I genuinely have experienced a lot of Art Growth this year (even if it doesn’t feel like I have) and there will always be more of that as long as I don’t Stop.
All this to say, I know this year has kind of been rough for everyone, and I really hope everyone is doing okay and doing what they need to to take care of themselves and each other while times are tough. Things will change. And I’m looking forward to seeing what they become next.
A huge thanks to my amazing commissioners this year, yall have really helped me out when money has been tight and I always appreciate your amazing generosity, patience, and kindness. I am so lucky to truly have the best clients ever, I am brewing you all a hot cozy beverage of your choice. Take care of yourselves through this winter season. May your holidays be as stress-free as they can be. And may you have a wonderful new year.
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king-there0f · 4 months
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My art vs artist this year! Its honestly been a…really rough year. I moved, I got covid (on my BIRTHDAY), I lost my car…Every time I thought things were going to finally calm down and level out they just, didn’t. I’ve been almost constantly overwhelmed, stuck, and feeling like I’m not moving fast enough to keep up with anything. I’m honestly not very happy with where my art is at right now. I feel stagnated and frustrated and the Big Seasonal Sad is hitting especially hard this year, which is not making me feel very positive or hopeful about improving in the next year.
But I know that I will. It was, frankly, a kind of terrible year. But good things happened as well. I am studying a new language and have been regularly attending lessons, the new place I moved has a balcony I enjoy sitting on when the weather is nice, I know I genuinely have experienced a lot of Art Growth this year (even if it doesn’t feel like I have) and there will always be more of that as long as I don’t Stop.
All this to say, I know this year has kind of been rough for everyone, and I really hope everyone is doing okay and doing what they need to to take care of themselves and each other while times are tough. Things will change. And I’m looking forward to seeing what they become next.
A huge thanks to my amazing commissioners this year, yall have really helped me out when money has been tight and I always appreciate your amazing generosity, patience, and kindness. I am so lucky to truly have the best clients ever, I am brewing you all a hot cozy beverage of your choice. Take care of yourselves through this winter season. May your holidays be as stress-free as they can be. And may you have a wonderful new year.
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For You: 4 O’Clock
Taglist: @jineunwootrash​
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All This Time
"Honestly, Yesung," I smile as we wrap up at the studio, "I'm gonna miss this. I can't believe this is our first time singing together!" 
"It does seem long overdue, huh?" Yesung grins, sitting back in his chair. "We can always do this again, Lei. I'm happy to see you back in the studio after all this time!"
"You know," I sigh, "I think I am too." 
I hadn't planned to return to S.M. as an artist, but I never quite ruled out the possibility. I guess I find comfort in open endings. When I first went on leave, I started working toward degrees in a variety of foreign languages— the ones I learned as an idol— intending to return to the agency as a translator. 
Then, Yesung sent me a demo of the perfect duet and asked me to sing it with him. Being the perfect husband, Taemin encouraged me to do it. "One song doesn't commit you to a career," he said, so now I am here: reimagining my dream of being an artist. 
The days of nonstop touring and practicing from sunrise to sunset have passed; my priorities are different now. Here in the shade with Yesung, where the light is gentle, I am comfortable. I am not ready to take the next big step. 
"You're glowing, Lei; you were meant to share your voice." Yesung beams at me. 
I want to tell him that I am only reflecting the light he and so many others have shone on me, but I don't get the chance. In his next breath, he asks, "How's our little miracle doing, by the way? Do you think he's expecting tomorrow's surprise party?" 
As fond wrinkles form around Yesung's eyes, my heart swells and overfills with adoration. I shake my head. "No. Obviously, Mom can keep a secret. With time, Taemin has gotten better at holding his tongue. With Lucas, Donghae, and Heechul running around the house, though, it's amazing that the cat is still in the bag. I try not to question miracles." 
"That seems wise," Yesung hums. "Best to enjoy secrecy while it lasts; they still have a full—" he glances down at his watch— "almost a full 24-hours to spoil the surprise!" 
We laugh. Then, a joyful sort of pout— yes, I realize that is some kind of an oxymoron— pulls at my lips. I run a hand through my hair after releasing it from its ponytail. "Can you believe that Tue is turning five?" 
"No!" Yesung's hair falls into his eyes when he shakes his head. "Just like I can't believe that you actually came around calling your son Tue after all those times you scolded Kim and Lucas for using that name!"
"Having two Lucases around gets confusing." I justify my change of heart, shrugging. "Plus, my boy is unique enough to justify that kind of name!" 
Yesung repeats, "Unique," agreeing with a subtle nod. "He reminds me a lot of you, especially now that he's reaching that age you were when we first met." 
It's strange— thinking about how much time has passed— thinking about how some things never change— realizing that some images repeat and replay. 
"Really?" 
Tilting my head, I study my lock screen picture. Lucas took it just last night; he immortalized the moment that Tue sat between me and Taemin at the piano in the den, and I don't know if I have thanked him enough. I squint at the photo as if that will help me see similarities between myself and my son; it doesn't help. 
"I think Tue is a carbon copy of Taemin in appearance and personality," I admit through laughter. "These days, he loves to watch music videos. He can replicate any choreography— and I mean any choreography— after seeing it just once. I've never seen anything like it!" 
Should the agency find out, I sometimes think and spark worry in my gut, they will set their sights on him. 
There it is— the reason why I am so reluctant to return to the stage as an idol: fear of drawing attention to Tue. It was difficult enough when he was born and everybody felt entitled to see him when he was too little to decide whether he wanted to exist under strangers' stares. 
What worries me most, I think, is the fact that I don't know when he will be old enough to make that decision. Five is definitely too young— Taemin and I agree about that, so we take great precautions to protect his privacy. Nobody who knows Tue posts pictures of him on social media; whenever he leaves the house, he wears a mask like we do; as Mom considers early retirement (and therefore takes on fewer group clients), her job has become primarily threatening paparazzi who consider releasing rare photographs of him. 
I have never cared whether people think I'm overprotective. I know too well of the pressures that come with living in the public eye, and I will defend my son from them for as long as I can. Tue is a star, and I know it's just a matter of time until he tries to follow in the footsteps of everybody he loves. I only comfort myself with the thought that it's not happening yet; it's not happening today; it probably won't happen tomorrow. 
"I've seen something like that!" Yesung's boast drags me out of my train of thought. "I don't know if you can still do this— I don't understand child prodigies all that well— but when you were a kid, you could play any song on the piano right after hearing it for the first time. Donghae said teaching you to read sheet music was like pulling teeth because you played everything by ear." 
Knowing that reading sheet music is still not my strong suit, I redden at Yesung's recollection. "Tue can do that too!" I want to brag. "He's the most talented person I've ever known, and he is barely five years old. He's the most gifted person I know, and that's saying something, given how many gifted people I've loved." 
Yesung nudges my ribs. "Why else do you think Henry was so obsessed with you? You both spoke the same piano language!"
"You know," I say, "Henry asked about interviewing Tue for his program about child prodigies."
"Oh yeah?" Although he knows me well enough to predict the answer, Yesung asks, "What did you say?"
"I said that he's welcome to see Tue and play music with him any time," I answer Yesung just as carefully as I answered Henry. "You know that there's nobody I could trust more than you guys— Super Junior— to lead Tue into the entertainment industry, but—" 
I squirm, and my stomach knots. "You know how I am. You know that the thought of sharing Tue— no— not the thought of sharing his talent and his sparkling smile and his sweet voice and his kindness— that's not the problem. I know that the world needs more people like my son. I just—" 
After all this time, my voice still trembles when I think about how cruel strangers are to good people. "I just wonder how well the world treats people like him. I wonder how much the world deserves people like him." 
Yesung rises from his seat to embrace me. His chin rests on the top of my chair. "I don't think anybody understands that anxiety better than your Mom." 
And it happens again: my love for Mom grows. My beautiful Mom. My kind Mom. My Mom who stood in the wings, my Mom who stood comfortably in my shadow. I always thought she was naturally aware of when to hold on and when to let go, but maybe balance was challenging to her too. 
Hearing Yesung describe our shared fear makes me imagine that I have grown to resemble Mom. Tears fill my eyes. I am always sensitive; especially about Mom, and especially around Tue's birthday. 
Before the first tear can fall, he is running to me, crawling into my lap, and holding my face in his hands that are so small, so soft— uncalloused and young. "What's wrong, Mommy?" 
Because the tears evaporate so quickly, I almost believe that they never existed. For a moment, when I cup Tue's rosy cheeks and give him my truest smile, I believe that I have never cried in my entire life. "I was just thinking about how much I missed my beautiful boy! It's all better now that you're here!"
Tue giggles when I push his dark curly hair out of his face and kiss his forehead. He's especially cute these days because he likes his hair long; he likes for the ends to tickle his dimpled chin. 
"I missed you too! I asked Daddy to bring me to see you and Uncle Lucas and—" his eyes— the feature that most closely resembles Taemin's because they contain all of the universe's stars— widen in time with the growth of his smile. "Great Uncle Yesung!" 
Tue transforms into a reincarnation of my childhood self when he abandons all thought in admiration of Yesung. He leaps out of my lap and runs into Yesung's laughing embrace. 
It's beautiful— thinking about how much time has passed— thinking about how some things never change— realizing that some images repeat and replay.
I consider that on my walk to the doorway, where Taemin stands, watching the scene with a smile. His fingers trace absentmindedly at the ribbon on his wrist that hasn't faded with the passage of time. The color hasn't faded since he restored it on that night by the lake. 
"I'm sorry if we interrupted your work," Taemin says softly when he catches me staring. "I told Tue not to just run into the studio, but you know how he gets when he's excited: just a teeny tiny bit disobedient. Or a teeny tiny bit forgetful." 
After teasing, "I wonder who he gets that from," and earning a chuckle in response, I assure Taemin, "You didn't interrupt anything. Yesung and I are done with the song. We just got to talking." 
Maybe Taemin noticed the tears before Tue carried them away, or maybe he hears that longtime blend of anxiety and craving for peace that almost always reveals itself in my voice through our conversations. His brow furrows as he wraps an arm around my waist. "Do you want to talk about it?" 
"Yeah," I answer immediately because I always want to talk about everything with Taemin. I told him once that I would grow to trust him with everything, and I have; for better or for worse, I hold nothing back. Watching Tue throw his head back laughing as Yesung tickles his ribs just below his armpits, right where he knows he's most ticklish, I condition, "Later though. Smiles and laughter for now, please." 
Taemin doesn't press the issue. In the beginning, he was always in such a rush, determined to force intimate conversation, no matter my discomfort. Now, he must realize that there is nothing I will keep from him forever. Now, he must understand that everything will come to light when we lie together under the moon. He no longer races to the rising of the moon or the rising of the sun; he lives in every moment. I admire him for that. 
Taemin smiles and winks at me before fixing his sight on Tue. "Hey little dude," Taemin says during the brief break in Tue's laughter, "Mommy is done for the day, and she wants to hang out with us! What do you wanna do?" 
Tue runs to us from Yesung's side. He reaches for Taemin, knowing well that his father will waste no time in lifting him onto his shoulders. 
"Alright." Taemin squats so Tue can climb on easily and so he doesn't hit his head on the doorframe. It's funny to watch Taemin, who was once spoiled rotten, who is still a bit rotten at the core, literally bending to the will of a small child. "What's the plan, kiddo?" 
Tue wastes no time pretending to think about his dream activity. Although he sees his namesake almost every day, he declares, "I wanna see Uncle Lucas!" 
Trusting that I still memorize my best friend's schedules, Taemin glances at me. Luckily enough, I still know where Lucas is at all times. Some people jokingly call it twin-telepathy, but it's only through my nagging reminders that Lucas ever gets where he needs to be. 
"He's downstairs teaching a dance class with Mark." I look down at my phone again; I couldn't hide my smile at the picture even if I tried. "It should be wrapping up soon, so—" 
Taemin cheers, "Off we go!" and runs toward the elevator. Tue squeals all the way down the hall, and I wish more than anything that I had been ready to record this moment. 
Before following my boys, I linger in the studio to tell Yesung, "Bye! Thank you for everything!" 
"See you tomorrow!" Yesung waves both hands. "You're welcome for everything! Never forget that I'm proud of you!" 
I smile because it is impossible to forget what Yesung has told me since we met.
. . . 
Although Taemin, Tue, and I stand quietly at the back of the room, Lucas notices us immediately. 
"Hey!" His booming clap disrupts the class, and all eyes fall on us. "There's my mini-me!"
It doesn't matter that Tue is identical to Taemin (apart from the wavy hair he inherited from me); Lucas has called him "mini-me" since the day he was born. That's just a consequence of naming my baby after my best friend. It's a consequence I can live with. 
It doesn't matter that Tue sees Lucas almost every day; they always greet each other with wide smiles and open arms as if they have been separated for lifetimes. That's just a result of the bond they share. 
Sometimes, I think that Tue was born not just to fill my every void and fade every scar. He was born to be the best friend Lucas always deserved. He was born to teach Taemin that he is much more than an idol. He makes us better just by existing. I have never loved anyone so much— with my entire heart, my entire soul, with every part of me that has ever existed and will ever exist. 
I run a hand through Tue's hair before Taemin passes him to Lucas. This transition of our most beloved person into the arms of another dear friend occurs without the arguments that gave me headaches at the start. We have accepted it by now: Lucas is Tue's favorite person on the planet. 
I don't care much to challenge that title since it means so much to Lucas and since I know from experience that the role of the mother is special on its own. I don't know much from experience about the role of the father except that its absence painful in more ways than words can describe; I don't know much except its absence leaves a void that most will try to fill with anything; I don't know much except Taemin is doing a good job, and I tell him so every day. 
Now, I tell him by reaching for his hand and lacing our fingers together. This— holding his hand— has always been my favorite act of affection. It's crazy to think that, once upon a time, I would have hesitated— I would have refused— I would have denied the desire to reach for him outside of our hotel room and our home. 
Sometimes, like now, Taemin looks stunned when I touch him. He flinches as if my touch is frozen or scalding or electric, but then he smiles and melts into me a little more. Every time I think we're done melting into each other, when I think that we already blended to create the perfect human being, we take another step together. 
"Hey!" Tue leans over Lucas's shoulder to look him in the eyes. "It's big-me!"
"Sh," I instruct quietly, bringing a finger to my puckered lips. "They're practicing, baby. We're guests, so we have to be quiet." 
Generally, Tue is a well-mannered boy. He just forgets proper etiquette when excited, and nobody excites him quite like Lucas. Turning slightly pink in the face, Tue nods and brings a finger to his puckered lips too. 
Moments of correction are always short-lived because Tue takes instruction well. I wink at him, and he winks back. The thing is— Tue has inherited Mom's lack of facial coordination, so he blinks both eyes. 
The sight makes Taemin laugh. When I was a kid, I would have wanted to cry if someone (especially someone as beautiful as Taemin) laughed at me. Tue's lips don't tremble in preparation for tears, though; his lips curl into a gap-toothed smile. Oh, there's another thing my baby gets from me: a gappy smile! It looks much cuter on him; I almost hope he never corrects it with braces.  
Because Taemin laughed, Tue laughs. He always copies his father. 
Raising my eyebrows, I give Lucas a look that clearly means, "Aren't you supposed to help Mark with this class?" 
Lucas understands. Maybe his understanding is the result of (fake) twin-telepathy or— more likely— it is the result of having known each other for eternities. Securing his hold around Tue, Lucas softly sings, "Priorities change, Lei." 
Because I completely restructured my life for Tue— and that's much more significant than ditching the last five minutes of a dance practice— I can't argue with Lucas. I can only nod. 
At the front of the room, Mark announces, "Alright guys, we're done for the day! Great work!" 
I hope that he hasn't ended practice early because we have caused an interruption, but it's hard to stay worried when Mark's trainees break into excited chatter. The atmosphere in this room is unlike anything I experienced as a trainee. People like Mark, people like Lucas— they have changed this place. They have brought light into the rooms, and I— I think I want to help them. 
Then, I look at Tue, and I know that I don't want him to spend his days sitting alone by the vending machine. I don't want him to spend his days sitting in the corner while I teach trainees. In no way do I resent my childhood; I just want to protect Tue from the loneliness that darkened too many days. 
Life is about finding balance, I think. Balance between Lei the idol and Lei the human. Balance between Lei the fearful and Lei the brave. Balance between Lei the skeptic and Lei the romantic. Balance between Lei the individual and Lei the wife. Balance between Lei the idol and Lei the mother. Balance between Lei of the past and Lei of now. Some of these, I have mastered. Some of these were easier to achieve than others. Some of these are a daily struggle. Some of these remain a mystery. 
I'm trying, though; that's enough for me now. I am proud of who I am now. I am proud of who I will be tomorrow. 
I wave to Mark, thinking that he has always had the best influence on others. Smiling, Mark waves back, calling "Happy Early Birthday, Lucas Tue!" (and receiving a chipper, "Thank you, Mr. Mark Lee!" in response) before I follow my family into the hall, led by Taemin's hand, with the sea of trainees. 
We sit at the table by the vending machine. It's much smaller now than it is in my memories. Maybe that's because I've grown so much; maybe that's because my family fills it with energy so bright that I don't notice the empty seats. 
Sitting in Lucas's lap, Tue asks, "Did you know tomorrow is my birthday?" 
Lucas gasps, "Tomorrow is your birthday?" 
Taemin laughs at how Tue's face contorts in utter bewilderment. His lips part, his brow furrows, and his skin is painted a flustered pink as he whines, "I don't know! Is it?" 
Because everyone has been so quiet in discussing birthday preparations around Tue, he must not realize the date. "Tomorrow is May 29," I tell him, "so you're gonna turn five years old!" I wiggle five fingers toward his face; he laughs when I tap his nose with one of my fingertips, throwing his head back against Lucas's chest. 
"What?!" Lucas cries; Tue laughs harder at the overreaction before Lucas even prods at his ticklish ribs. "Five?! That's crazy, man! That's older than me!" 
Tue sputters, "No— no it's not! You're way— way— way older than five!" 
"I am not!" Lucas argues, dropping his jaw to feign offense. "You know who is way older than five, though?"
As if sharing the same brain cell, Lucas and Tue settle their sights on Taemin, who, tightening his grip on my hand, drops his jaw, taking genuine offense. “I am not! I’m the biggest baby at this table!”
When Taemin crosses his arms over his chest and pouts his pretty lips, nobody thinks to argue. Lucas and Tue snort, failing to contain their laughter at Taemin’s expense. I so badly want to laugh with them, but I want more to kiss Taemin, so I peck at his lips. 
At the kiss, Lucas and Tue do not squeal in disgust like most little boys would; they squeal in utter delight. 
. . . 
It’s hard to find an alone moment with Mom in our full house, but I find one after Taemin and I tuck Tue into bed. Mom is setting up Finding Nemo decorations around the pool. We chose that theme for Tue's party since it's his favorite movie. 
Even wearing her pajamas with her hair tied up in a messy bun, Mom looks beautiful among the moon and stars. "What's going on, Lei?" She drapes a cloth over a fold-out table. "You're wearing your pensive face." 
I try to laugh at myself by saying, "I'm always wearing my pensive face." 
Because I have yet to tell Taemin about my conversation with Yesung, my worries are a tangled knot at the forefront of my mind. It's a messy business, untangling the knot, and it's always easier with Taemin's help. 
Tracing my finger along Nemo's little lucky fin on the table cloth, I prod at the knot on my own. "I'm just wondering how you knew when to hold me close and when to let me stand in the spotlight." 
Mom stills to meet my eyes. "I know I wasn't perfect," she prefaces. When I try to disagree, she interrupts. "I'm human, Lei. I did the best I could, but I know I could have been better. Anyone can see through hindsight, in any situation, that they could have been better. They should have been better." 
Mom has this way of speaking that nobody can replicate. She acknowledges faults and shortcomings through a lens that is never degrading, never belittling. She looks at the past in such a light that does not inspire regret but instead inspires a better tomorrow. 
I admire Mom for that. I want to be like her. After all this time, I have not grown out of aspiring to be like Mom. 
"When I think about how you used to sit alone at that table by the vending machine before Lucas walked into your world; when I think about how you used to cling to the wall in the corner of every room; when I think about how I used to hear you crying in your room at night when you thought I was asleep— when you thought your radio was loud enough to drown out your tears with SHINee's voices—"
Mom's voice wavers, and her gaze crashes onto the table. Now that I see her so affected by past pains even in the happiest stage of life to date, I understand: it was never easy for Mom. She just carried the burden where I couldn't see it. 
"I always wondered if I was doing the right thing. I wondered if the spotlight found you because you walked into it or because I nudged you toward it. When you became a trainee and Donghae told me that Sehun said people were being cruel to you—" Mom bristles— "you don't know how much I wanted to pull you out of the agency. You don't know how badly I wanted to take you and hide you someplace where nobody could hurt you. But—"
Mom laughs— genuinely laughs— when I wrap my arms around her, thinking, knowing that a place without pain does not exist (at least not on earth). It's enough that she wanted to take me there, I think. It's enough that she wanted that place to exist for me. 
She asks, "Do you know that part in Finding Nemo where Dory tells Marlin, 'Well, you can't never let anything happen to him. Then nothing would ever happen to him'?"
I nod. Even though Tue often falls asleep in my lap by that part of the movie, I know it well.
"Quickly— maybe instantly— I realized that you are too special not to share with the world." Mom cups my face with both hands. She kind of pinches my cheeks because they are still full; they still make me look very much like a child. "This world would be a sadder, duller place without your light shining in it. I decided that if anyone out there tries to dampen your light— well—" 
Mom smiles, so I smile too. 
"I would work a million times harder to keep it burning."
. . .
When I tell Taemin about my conversation with Yesung in the studio and my conversation with Mom under the moon, he says, "That's all very beautiful, baby. It almost makes me want to cry. But I still think Tue is way too young to be an idol." 
I have almost drifted to sleep with my head on Taemin's chest because the steady beat of his heart has always been one of my greatest comforters. I lift my head to narrow my eyes at him. "How did you gather from any of that that I want our son to be an idol?" 
Taemin squints, trying to make out my features in the dark. "I don't know! It just seemed like you were coming to terms with letting him wander into the spotlight, and I thought maybe it was my turn to be the voice of reason!" 
Even without the slightest aid offered by the pale moonlight, I would see the smirk curling his lips. "The last time I was the voice of reason was during our first New Year when you dropped your dress—"
"Let it go, Taemin!" I chastise, wondering how and why I let his sentence get that far before rolling my eyes. "That happened how many years ago?" 
"I don't know. Time is all relative anyway." Taemin probably feels like some kind of genius or the mysterious picture of a soulmate he was at the beginning. "It happened how ever many years ago, and it's still one of my favorite memories! It never fails to make me smile." 
I shake my head and lay on my back beside him. "We're way off track. Anyway, I completely agree: Tue is too young to be an idol. The agency wouldn't even let him audition until he turns ten. Even then, I'm not going to suggest that he audition. I'm not going to actively nudge him anywhere near that path." 
Moments pass in silence. Taemin rolls onto this side to trace patterns on my stomach. In addition to calming me, this gentle affection helps him organize his thoughts.
"I think we should cross that bridge when we come to it," he says, as usual. "Obviously, I want to support him in anything he wants to do. I won't really know how to help him if he wants to be a doctor or a lawyer, but— well— think of how much we can guide him if he wants to follow in our footsteps." 
Taemin makes a good point. Having two idol parents might make Tue a target for bullies— I know that having a manager for a mother made me one— but cruel people will justify their actions with any excuse. What makes Tue stand out could double as a strength; I know having my particular mother made me stronger. Similarly, Tue could turn to me and Taemin and Mom and Lucas and his entire network of well-wishing idols for advice, and we would all be equipped by our experiences to help him in some way. 
"I'm so glad I have you." I roll onto my side so that my face is level with Taemin's and I can clearly see the night sky reflected in his eyes. "You embody that perfect balance between listening and advising. You always have. I love you so much for that. I always have." 
He smiles, and my heart flutters. "I'm glad I have you too. Thank you for trusting me and listening to my advice. I love you so much for that. I always will." 
Taemin creates the perfect atmosphere for honesty. With a glance, he encourages me to carry my darkest thoughts into the light. It feels like he is carrying them with me; they are less heavy this way. That's why I admit, suddenly on the verge of tears, "I'm afraid that I haven't made my love for Tue clear enough."
I have rarely cried since taking a break from being Lei the idol. My outburst must send Taemin back in time to the very start when I first cried to him under the moon's watch— to the night when the moon became ours. Back then, he was so careful. He resisted the destined desire to touch me, to embrace me, because he didn't want to frighten me. Now, he moves instantly, instinctively, to hold me. 
His lips meet mine for a second. After just a second, he tries to part, but I need him. I need him, and that hasn't scared me in so many moons. I need him, and I bring him back down to me and hold him here until we have kissed most of my worries away. 
We always keep a few worries because Taemin says they keep us safe. He thinks my talent for spotting danger is, in moderation, one of our greatest strengths. I'm good at seeing a storm cloud from a million miles away; Taemin is good at making a hurricane feel like an overdue summer drizzle. That's why we are the greatest team to ever exist. 
"Tue knows you love him," Taemin assures me in a whisper against my lips. "Anyone who knows you— anyone who knows us knows that we weren't really breathing until Tue took his first breath."
That's not to say that life wasn't worth living before Tue existed. Just like my life was as happy as it could have been before Lucas, and it was happier once he laughed and painted the world anew; just like my life was as happy as it could have been before Taemin, and it was happier once he handed me the moon; my life was as happy as it could have been before Tue, and it was happier once he breathed. 
Tue's breath gave me every beautiful wonder I never knew existed— the heavenly traces on earth that nobody can see with the naked eye until they have seen and felt and loved their child. 
"Does the world know?" My mouth hurts from frowning. "These past five years— have we done the right thing by keeping Tue off of social media? The agency issued the briefest statement about him, like, a week after he was born, and I don't even know if they mentioned his name. Mom deletes all leaked traces of him from the internet. Any time interviewers are bold enough to ask you about him, the agency pressures the network to cut the clip." 
They do all of these things at our request. 
Taemin wipes the tears spilling from my eyes as I wonder, "When Tue gets older, what will he think about the fact that his parents said nothing about him where the world could hear?" 
"Hopefully he'll understand that his parents loved him enough to protect him until he was old enough to protect himself," Taemin answers in a tone that does not belittle my fears in his effort to quell them. "It's not like you've been active on social media at all these past five years, Lei. If Tue ever asks, and I doubt he will, we can explain that you spent all of your time with him while I—"
Taemin's voice falters. 
One of his biggest insecurities— maybe you could call it a regret— is that while I walked away from my career the moment I felt Tue's life, he hadn't deviated much from the course he had been on most of his life. I never pressured Taemin to make a career shift in any direction; at every opportunity, I expressed my belief that there is no right or wrong move when finding the balance between family life and work. Needs vary, and I believe that people can adapt to almost any situation. 
Taemin's pace has changed somewhat over time. Early morning practices with Jongin became scarce after Tue was born; now, they are almost obsolete. He says that he likes to be home for breakfast and early morning cartoons. 
He isn't as excited about promoting abroad when Tue and I can't tag along. As you can probably imagine, some trips cannot function as family vacations. He swears that video calls before bed are not enough to fill the void in his day when we aren't there. 
He doesn't look forward to awards ceremonies like he once did. We agreed that Tue shouldn't attend events where strangers' cameras abound. He says that even if we did attend, he would be expected to sit with his group, not with us. 
The studio isn't his second home anymore. Whenever he has to stay later than expected, he comes home with a million apologies, a bouquet of roses for me, and a new toy for Tue. At this point, Tue has an entire colony of plush Nemos on his bed; he sleeps cuddling every single one. It doesn't matter how often I tell him that he has nothing to apologize for; he apologizes and apologizes and I know he will apologize again. 
I know that he feels torn between his roles as Taemin the idol, Taemin the husband, and Taemin the father. I just don't know how to help him. He made so little time for Taemin the human being that, sometime during the first week of May, he had some kind of emotional breakdown at the studio that compelled SHINee to delay the release of their new album. 
Deciding that he didn't want anybody to blame Taemin for the postponement, Jinki offered to take the heat. He told Mom, "Issue a statement claiming that I'm suffering from a gluteal strain after an impromptu breakdancing battle!"
Jinki's Rationale for the Gluteal Strain Story:
"The key is to tell a lie so outrageous that nobody can doubt it! Nobody will question a story about a literal pain in the butt!"
Anyway, that's why Taemin and I have swapped roles lately. He is taking his first break from being an idol to spend time with Tue. While they watch movies and play the piano and work through those online pre-school activities, I am dipping my toes back into the world of recording. I don't know yet what I will do in terms of a career, but I know that Taemin will return to the stage revitalized. He is remarkably resilient, born to shine. 
Knowing I can't alter Taemin's self-perception, I card my fingers through his hair and praise him anyway. "Taemin, Tue learns so much about hard work, passion, and dedication from you. He truly admires you in the purest way. He doesn't see the distinction between his father and his idol because you fulfill those responsibilities so well—so much better than I ever could— so much better than I was willing to try." 
I kiss the crown of Taemin's head as he buries his face in the crook of my neck. "We're so proud of you. Don't forget that." 
"Thank you," Taemin mumbles against my skin. "I haven't forgotten. I just— I'm so proud of you for being Tue's mom, but I'm sorry if I pressured you to walk away from your dreams to carry my weight here—"
"Taemin." I nudge him until he looks down at me with wide apologetic eyes. "You didn't pressure me into anything. You didn't pressure me into anything at all." 
He looks unconvinced, judging by his pout, so I explain, "I have so many dreams! To be a genuine artist, to be a loving daughter, to be a reliable friend, to be a comforting wife, to be an inspiring Mom." 
I wrap my arms around Taemin's waist and hug him closer. "I heard once that growing up is a process of letting your dreams die one by one, but I disagree. Every day that I'm with you, I discover a new dream I don't think I have to choose one over all the others. I just have to find balance. And we'll find it together; that's what we always do." 
Finally, Taemin smiles. I smile. We can breathe again. 
He lays against me, and our chests rise and fall together. We melt a little more, and I— I can't tell where he ends and I begin. I can't remember a time when we were separate beings. I don't ever want to remember. 
"Do you want me to go on Instagram live to say that my wife and son are everything to me? Or should I air footage of one of Tue's baby albums? Or should I post videos and pictures from life with you these past five years? Or should I read our story where anyone can hear?"
Between each question, Taemin has kissed me. His lips hover over mine as he begs, "Tell me what to do, Lei. Tell me how to make your dreams come true, and I'll do it. I'll do anything." 
He doesn't understand that I am already living my dream. I don't know how to make him understand. 
"Just kiss me again," I instruct softly. Sweetly, Taemin complies. "And let's think about something special we can do to love our son on his birthday."
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When Taemin and I tiptoe into his room early the next morning, we expect to find Tue fast asleep, snoring into his pillow while clutching a Nemo plushie. Instead, we find him lying with his belly against the floor, kicking his bare feet int he air while doodling on a piece of paper. 
While Taemin sits before Tue, I sit beside him and ask, "Can I see your drawing, baby?" 
Tue has never denied me access to his art before. I love seeing the smile that curls his lips whenever I express interest in his creativity. "Yep!" His enthusiastic nod sends his unruly morning curls flopping. "But I'm not just drawing something, Mommy." 
Taemin's brow furrows as he tries to decipher Tue's handwriting. He is at a disadvantage because a.) from where he sits, Tue's letters are upside down, b.) the note is written entirely in English, which still isn't Taemin's strong suit, and c.) Tue has chosen to write with the palest yellow crayon in his arsenal. 
Sweetly, Taemin asks, "What is it?" Leaning forward, he sets his elbows on the hardwood floor and props his chin in his hands. 
Tue delights in the opportunity to explain anything from why he thinks the sky is blue to why he thinks roses are the prettiest flowers to why Finding Nemo is the best movie ever. His face lights up at Taemin's question.
"It's a letter to Mr. Mark Lee!" Tracing his little fingers along his letters, Tue reads, "Thanks for saying 'Happy Birthday' yesterday. I forgot my birthday. You didn't. You make me very happy!" 
Tue turns the paper so Taemin can read it. "And look! I drew me here and Mr. Mark Lee here, and we have big smiles and party hats!"
When Tue gives Taemin his gappy smile, I can't contain myself. While Taemin takes the paper from Tue's hand, my heart explodes as I pull Tue onto my lap. Holding him around the waist, I pepper his forehead, cheeks, nose, and chin with kisses; he giggles all the while. 
"You're the sweetest boy in the whole world, Tue!" I boast, and he beams at the praise. "Who taught you how to write 'Thank You' notes?" 
"I dunno!" He shrugs his shoulders. "Probably you or Daddy. You and Daddy teach me everything!" 
I raise my eyebrows, giving Taemin this look that means, "I told you so. He knows that you're a great father. I told you so!"
Taemin probably doesn't notice. He smiles at Tue as he returns the paper to his baby soft hand. "You're going to give this to Mr. Mark Lee the next time you see him, right? I bet getting a letter like this would make him very happy." 
At that suggestion, Tue's face burns crimson. In many ways, he is one of the most confident, outgoing people I have ever known; in others, he is even more bashful than I have ever been. In five years of knowing him, I have yet to figure out how he manages that degree of duality. Considering that Tue is forever charming — whether bold or shy — I am inclined to believe duality is another quality he inherited from Taemin. 
As he leans into me and hides his face in my shirt, Tue entrusts his paper to my hand. "Can you give that to Mr. Mark Lee, Mommy? I want to make him very happy, but I can't give it to him! I just can't!
Maybe I should gently nudge Tue out of his comfort zone, especially since there is nothing to fear about approaching Mark. Maybe I should take this chance to teach him that self-expression is nothing to be embarrassed about. I can't do it, though. As precious as he looks with rose-colored cheeks, I can't darken my baby's blush. 
"I'll give it to him," I promise, urging him to lift his head to meet my bright smile. "He'll love it! Now go to Daddy, alright? He's gonna help you get dressed." 
Looking down at his pajamas donning Nemo's face, of course, Tue pouts. He crosses his arms. He really looks and sounds like Taemin when he whines, "I don't wanna get dressed!"
"Well, you have to," Taemin says as he scoops Tue into his arms. Carrying him to the closet, Taemin responds to Tue's whines, "If you don't get dressed, I can't take you to your surprise!"
As I walk to the door, I hear Tue squeal, "Surprise?" Taemin laughs at his reaction. Tue's squeal and Taemin's laugh are the reasons why I smile when I walk downstairs to tell everybody that the birthday boy is on his way. 
. . . 
I push the curtains aside and from my side of the kitchen window, I watch Donghae carrying Tue on his shoulders in the pool. Following Mom's instruction to "Behave! At least around the baby!" Heechul stands beside them, donning a smile for Lucas's camera. 
The sight is especially comforting considering how annoying Donghae and Heechul were at the beginning. Apparently, when nobody was listening, Heechul told Tue, "Call me Grandpa, and call him—" he pointed a finger at Donghae— "Grandpa 2." 
Tue was too young and too sweet to understand that Heechul was up to his old shenanigans of competing with Donghae, so he followed the instruction faithfully, much to Donghae's dismay. 
"Don't worry," Tue said to Donghae's frown, flashing him a big toothy smile. "I'm a 2 too!"
I wish I or Mom or Lucas— since he has appointed himself the family photographer— had recorded the smile Tue sculped onto Donghae's face. I would love to carry a picture of it with me so I could show it to you and everybody I meet, saying, "This is my son's mark on the world, and it's the most beautiful mark anybody has ever made. He is five years old, and he has never hurt a living creature. He is five years old, and he makes smiles wherever he goes." 
My mental images of Tue's gappy smile and those he leaves in his wake are among my most prized possessions. I am admiring them when Mark walks in through the back door, carrying an empty bowl. 
His eyes widen as if he has interrupted something. He beelines to the refrigerator, muttering, "Your mom said there's more watermelon in the fridge." 
Glancing down at the platter of snacks I have assembled, I frown at the utter lack of watermelon. "I should have known that we would need more watermelon with you and Tue eating at the same place at the same time." 
Mark laughs, dropping the empty bowl into the sink. "Well, what can I say?" He grabs the bowl of sliced watermelon Mom prepared last night and tosses a slice into his mouth. "Little man and I have good taste!"
"Speaking of little man—" I smile at Mark's nickname for Tue as I close the refrigerator door and point to a pinned paper— "he wrote this for you." 
After setting the bowl onto the counter, Mark takes the page into his hand. He doesn't have to squint to make out the letters. "He's writing 'Thank You' letters? To me? At five years old?"
I can't help but smile at Mark's awestruck expression. "You made his day, and I guess he wanted you to know."
Mark's slack-jawed expression transforms into a radiant smile. "Can I keep this?" 
"It's for you," I repeat, nodding, "so I think you're supposed to keep it. See the little faces at the bottom?" Mark nods, so I explain, "The artist says the big one is you and the little one is his latest self-portrait." 
Mark smiles at the paper once more before folding it into his pocket. As we grab our snacks, we walk together to the back door. We stop once Mark asks, "Before we go back outside, can I ask you something?" 
"Yeah." There's something petrifying about Mark's quiet voice, so I hope my smile will encourage him to speak up. "What's up?" 
"You know how I'm working with the trainees?" When I nod, Mark continues, "As far as I'm concerned they're all set talent-wise. I only really work with them on dancing and rapping— Taeil is the vocal instructor." 
Based on what I saw in the final five minutes of dance practice yesterday, I agree. It seems that the trainees get better with each generation. "They seem like they will make excellent artists one day." 
"They will!" Mark beams, seeming as proud of his trainee's progress as he is of his own achievements. "I've been thinking about how else I can help them grow, and I think maybe we should spend time talking about, like, emotional wellbeing."
"That sounds like a good idea." I, for one, could have benefited from learning about that as a trainee. 
"I'm glad you think so," Mark says slowly, "because I kind of want you to help me with those conversations." 
My jaw drops. "Me?" By no means have I ever considered myself an expert on emotional wellbeing. "Why?"
Mark's head goes aslant; he looks at me as if challenging me to look at myself. "When I think of strength, I think about how you carried yourself in training when those girls were mean to you. I think about how you stayed best friends even when people watched you and whispered. I think about how you didn't fall apart when the media used to speculate about the idol who never debuted. I think about how you held your head high when people criticized you for dating, then marrying, then having a baby with Taemin. But mostly— " Mark smiles — "I think about how you changed your whole life for Lucas Tue. I can't think of anyone better to teach the trainees that as much as we love music, as much as we love being idols, there is a lot more to life than the spotlight." 
I blink, wondering how, when, and why Mark became so well-spoken. My gaze falls onto the snack platter in my hands. "I— I don't know how to teach anybody that." 
Mark sighs, dejected, and I compulsively admit, "But I want to learn. I would love to learn, Mark."
Before Mark can reply, Tue runs in through the open back door, asking, "Mommy, where—" 
His voice falls flat as his eyes widen at the sight of Mark. "Mr. Mark Lee," Tue stutters, "I— I—" 
Before Mark can reply, Tue runs back outside. 
Mark looks at me, raising his eyebrows. "What did I do?"
Making my way out the door and into the summer sun, I explain, "He's being bashful because of that letter. He gets into shy moods from time to time." 
"Oh, okay." As we set our snacks onto the table, Mark asks, "Wait, did I hear you right? Did you mean that you would help me with the trainees?" 
From their sunchairs nearest to the snack table, Lucas and Taemin look up. Tue has concealed his flustered face against Taemin's chest, and he doesn't perk up at the sound of Mark's voice; he retreats further into Taemin's embrace. 
Taemin meets my eyes. Although he is reluctant to pressure me with vocal encouragement, he offers a gentle smile that seems to whisper, "Go for it. You can do anything." 
Lucas, true to who he has always been and always will be, is much louder about his support. He lowers his sunglasses. "Wait, you're gonna help me and Mark with the trainees? As in, we're having a mini ot8 SuperM reunion?" 
Mark glances at me with apologetic eyes as he pops another slice of watermelon into his mouth. Once upon a time, I think I would have glared at anyone for putting me on the spot like that. Depending on who it was, I might have even scolded them. I can't bring myself to scold Mark, though; I can't bring myself to glare at him, and I don't want to try. 
"I'll help," I decide easily, "in any way I can." 
I guess I don't want to disappoint Mark's perception of me; I want to live up to it. I guess I want to believe Yesung— that I am meant to share my voice. I guess I want to believe Mom—  that I can make the world a happier, brighter place with my light shining in it. I guess I want to be to the trainees who Mark is to them, who Mom has always been to me: someone who works a million times harder than the light dampeners to keep their light burning. 
Tue lifts his head from Taemin's chest to cheer, "You can do it, Mommy! You're the best helper!"
As I sit by his side, Taemin raises his eyebrows, giving me a look that means, "I told you so. He knows you perfectly. I told you so." 
"Thank you, baby," I wink at Tue. I whisper in his ear, "Mr. Mark Lee loves your letter, by the way." 
Tue smiles and lays his head back on Taemin's chest. When he closes his eyes, he looks exhausted. I think he falls asleep in an instant.
Lucas follows Mark to the pool, I think, for fear of waking Tue with his booming voice. Thus, Taemin and I are alone with our son again, even at the bustling party hosted in his honor.
Taemin asks, "Are you happy today?" in a voice so quiet that I think he's whispering sweet nothing to our sleeping boy until his eyes rise to meet mine. "I remember you said, once upon a time, 'Life doesn't always go as planned, and I think that's okay as long as you like where you end up.' And I'm wondering again if you like where you ended up— if you like where you're going next." 
My heart always flips when Taemin quotes our story. "I recall saying, 'Anywhere with you is where I want to end up.'" I reach for Taemin's hand— the one closest to me, the one that isn't secured around Tue. "I still feel that way, Anywhere with you is where I want to go next." 
Taemin flashes a sparkling smile before puckering his lips, wordlessly daring me to kiss him. Because I am no coward, I accept the dare before he can even blink. And just when I think that this moment is too beautiful to pass, I hear it. 
The snapping of Lucas's camera capturing us in a photograph.
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saintmachina · 5 years
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What were some parts of seminary that you liked, versus ones you didn’t? I’m thinking about my future (read: freaking tf out) and I know I want to study theology in some way, I’m just not sure how exactly, ya feel?
Thanks for the question! Your mileage may vary: I went to a Princeton Seminary, which I would categorize as a theologically/politically moderate, academic, traditional Western-style seminary. Seminary culture varies WIDELY from school to school, so keep that in mind when choosing between, say, a Princeton, which may be a more insular academic community focused on research and internships, and a Fuller, which may be a larger community more integrated with the surrounding city concerned with practical training for missionaries, worship leaders, and Christian artists. This is NOT to say that you can’t learn to be an awesome worship leader at PTS (I know them) or an awesome theology professor at Fuller, but make sure you shop around for your particular cultural, career, and academic needs. 
Things I Loved
The residential experience. Nearly all students at PTS live in beautiful on-campus housing or in apartments specialized for families with children just a few miles away. Living a few minutes walk from the library, my professors’ offices, and the chapel was amazing, especially since students at PTS tend to be sociable with the others who live on their hall. I would often spend my evenings studying with friends in their dorm rooms, and since everyone on campus at any given time tends to eat their meals in the cafeteria together, I formed a strong clique of ten or so people who unpacked my readings + spiritual crises with me at the lunch table. 
Spiritual friendships. I was able to make deeper friends than ever before in my life from a variety of denominational and theological backgrounds. We saw each other through vocational shifts, prayed with each other, administered the Eucharist to each other, celebrated birthdays and ordinations together, and stayed up late into the night when anyone needed us. I would literally drive across the country to bail any of them out of jail at a moment’s notice.  
The emotional crucible. Seminary is bootcamp for the soul. You get exposed to so many new ideas and theologies, learn how to preach, sit at people’s bedside while they’re sick, pull together responses for every new act of violence in the news, and most of the time, are thrust into a leadership role at a church that is either going under and begging you to save them or so large and thriving that it nearly swallows you whole. Nothing will grow you up like that. I have an insane amount of poise now dealing with other people’s crises, rage, or grief, and that wasn’t the case when I matriculated. Pastors are all making it up as we go along, but seminary gives at least the appearance of sage wisdom under pressure. 
Academic engagement with theology. This one seems obvious, but after spending four years in a secular liberal arts university that was tolerant of my enduring interest in religion but didn’t offer me an outlet for it, seminary was balm in Gilead. I loved being able to dig into what I really cared about directly, be that metaphysics, church history, or the Bible as literature, and I thrived being surrounded by other people who cared about it and did the reading and wanted to explore together. 
Freedom to research what I wanted. There are plenty of demanding intro-level courses that throw you to the ground and kick you while you cry into your notecards (New Testament, what’s good) but it was fun being on that ride with the rest of your small cohort, and upper-level classes offered chances to research what you cared about. I got to present research on astrology in the book of Daniel, queer American Muslim communities, IVF treatments and theology in Ghana, overlap in myths about Odin and Jesus, and I did an independent research study linking the emergent church to the spike in Millennials re-discovering the Episcopal and Catholic churches.The library was stuffed to the brim with books I would kill for. What a treat.
The melting pot. PTS DEFINITELY has its ideological and admissions biases but they do work hard to create a diverse student body, and I was close with students from so many different counties, denominations, ethnicities, and political leanings, which was enriching beyond belief. It was one of the big reasons I chose a seminary degree. That said, not all schools skew diverse, and I was very specific about choosing a seminary that was explicitly affirming of women in ministry and the goodness and wholeness of LGBTQ+ folks, so I knew that I would be supported by general school policies. Getting that information up front is important. 
Access to university resources. This one is PTS specific, but I went to a independent seminary closely linked to and basically on the same campus as Princeton University (they were the same school back in the 1800s until an amicable split, but we’re still cozy). This meant that I had access to Princeton U libraries, free events, lectures, and religious life, and I was a member of the Episcopal Church at Princeton U for most of my time at seminary. People bribe admissions officials or work themselves to nervous breakdown to get access to the resources I had at my fingertips, and I don’t take that for granted. 
The aesthetic. If I’m gong to take tens of thousands dollars of loans out for graduate school you bet you’re ass I’m going to be sitting in American Hogwarts while I do it. 
Things I Did Not
The cliquishness. This one is a double-edged sword, because I thrived on having a clique of high-functioning. highly-educated pastors who ate at the same lunch table and gossiped about the same people and showed up to campus parties in a gang, but that’s not always healthy. People tended to fragment off by denomination or where they fall on the liberal-conservative scale, and differences can fester that way. Students of color were often implicitly excluded from certain spaces through this behavior. Humans skew towards tribalism to begin with, but when you put super socially-oriented people with strong beliefs in one space where they have to live on top of each other and are looking for low-effort socializing after a long day in the trauma ward, confessional, or picket line, it gets worse. 
Imposter syndrome. Maybe it’s grad school in general that does this, but I spent most of my degree fighting off the feeling that I was dumb, lazy, not serious enough about my “calling” or my research, and probably a heretic. Part of my character growth came from learning not to give a fuck about what people who didn’t share my passions thought of them, and from realizing that I wasn’t on the ordination or PhD track like most of my peers, and that was okay. So I grew from this, but it stung like hell. I cried a lot.
No handholding. The professors at PTS were, by and large, old school, and they were busy as hell. While there was opportunities for office hours, most engagement with professors came in the performative form of “a question, well, more of a comment really” during lectures. Students, (mostly men, I’m not going to lie to you) scrambling for a good letter of rec for a PhD tended to monopolize whatever time professors had. I can think of exceptions (Ellen Charry was exceptional and made time for me in her home when I was struggling to unpack antisemitic theology) but it was a far cry from the literature department in my undergrad, where professors were accessible and knew me personally as mentors and friends. 
Caregiver burnout. This is my big one, and is the reason I’m still in recoup mode doing the office job thing instead of working in formal ministry. Everyone at my school was a pastor, hospital chaplain, activist, or social worker. We are the people who care so much, and who are constantly doing emotional labor for those around us with no time off and usually, poor personal boundaries. Working in a field where it is your job to hold everyone’s hurt and be the face of God to them while their life falls apart is….hard. It was not unusual for me to work ten hours at Penn on my feet in campus ministry, helping people sort through whether or not they wanted to report their sexual assault, holding mini-interventions about excessive drinking, and scrambling to re-schedule worship night after my volunteer went to the hospital after a suicide attempt, and then ride the train home while my phone blew up with news of a new mass shooting that I would have to help host a candlelight vigil for. You hold your parishioner’s hand while they die in hospice. You watch social services take your client’s children away. You stand still while someone screams at you for being too political in your sermon, or not political enough. You sit down to do the budget only to realize the beloved pastor who just retired had been embezzling. Typical Tuesday. 
A lot of the items on these lists are specific to my temperament and the culture at PTS, but by and large I would say it was an amazing experience well worth my time, effort, and money. I pushed myself academically beyond what I believed I was capable of, made the deepest friends of my life, found a home denomination, learned how to effectively care for others and myself, and was met by God in transformative ways again and again. Someday I may get that ordination or work for a ministry nonprofit again, but I have skills now that no one can take away from me, skills I use every day in some capacity. 
Good luck in your discernment process, and I pray you find yourself in exactly the place you need to be!
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reflective essay
REFLECTIVE ESSAY 
 My portfolio shows extensive experience working with VFX, video editing, logo reveals and digital painting.  For example, I did a ten second video clip on the topic of global warming for which I came up with an original concept to experiment with a fire simulation. My freelance work also contains digital painting for clients in which I digitally painted their portraits. For another project, I chose the logo of a famous brand and created a ten second logo reveal video. In my free time I created a landscape and fantasy character for a flexible man, inspired by the character of the Captain in Fantastic 4.
  In other areas of experimentation, I downloaded a random video and created a motion tracking video. My first attempt was a failure, but I refused to give up, and finally succeeded on my fourth attempt. I created a Mother’s Day poster in which I tried to portray women’s strength and power and the love between mother and son.  
 I was also inspired by a Ramzan poster I saw on a website and created a Ramzan poster. I experimented with breaking away from the typical use of the color green for Islamic subjects by using blue for the design. 
I have also experimented extensively with 3D. I have created several objects including a wine bottle, laptops, a low poly home and shops. I also created a logo using the Tamil letter ‘m’ for a foreign client. They were very impressed with the final product as working with Tamil can be quite challenging. 
 I created a lyrical video for my song  for which I researched about how to create lyrical videos. In my own ideas while I was creating lyrical videos I was firstly confused with that because I had to merge two different ideas into one   and I tried  my best in first attempt  and felt  that lyrical  texts are to sync the song  then I made and  this video is also added for my portfolio.  
 When I began my research for component 1, I took VFX  for my research topic. It was a fantastic opportunity to broaden my learning. I focused on the South Indian cinema and advertising sector, as well as on a little bit of Hollywood. I learnt how the VFX industry grew, and gained an understanding of where it is headed in the future.  
 To study the evolution of the VFX industry, I studied two cinematic eras, and then compared them. The rapid growth of the industry is impressive, and suggests that it will one day come to dominate the way we make films in the future.  
 For my showreel,  I wanted to create real time action to which I could apply my VFX work.  Although this was challenging, I really put my heart into it in order to create something that can be a real show-piece to propel me in my career. The line I chose as my starting point and inspiration was ‘The boy has unnatural powers’. 
I wrote a story of three scenes based on this in which the boy enters a room. There is a rope hanging over a box in the corner. He takes the rope and begins to twist it. The rope catches fire and begins to burn, opening a portal through which we see a sky and forest. The boy enters this portal, and finally sees a waterfall before him.  I faced a number of challenges developing this scene, working with light, rotoscoping, and with my choice of colors. Eventually I had to ignore a few elements in order to complete the work within the short time limit.  
 As part of my second year work, I also worked on my resume. My instructor suggested that I change a few elements to make it more eye-catching, as well as simpler in design. After that I reworked my resume as he suggested from scratch by listing all the experience I have as a motion graphics artist, beginning with my work on a Tamil movie. I was initially a little confused about what to mention in my experience, but after a few sessions, I was much clearer on how to analyze my past work experience and how to list it chronologically.  I was finally able to complete two versions of the resume as well as a cover letter in which I was able to talk about my roles on various free-lancing jobs as well as my coursework. My first resume was points form  resume other one was with little bit description about my experience  for example I  would work as a motion graphics artist and I talk about which kind of work I did and what kind of issue and trouble I faced
Towards the end of the second semester, I had my stage 1 interview session with a person from the  industry. It was an amazing learning experience on how to attend an interview and to respond confidently, as well as dress presentably. They asked me three main questions. They asked me why I chose this field as a career. I spent a long time answering this question. The interviewer was very impressed with my portfolio, especially the piece on global warming. She finally asked me how I felt I could contribute to their company, and I enjoyed answering this question in some detail. At the end of it, I felt my confidence really grow, and feel much more prepared to face an interviewer in the future. 
 Towards the end of this program I had a lot of problems and issues with my pc, which seriously impacted my ability to complete work before the deadline. I also had power supply issues, and unfortunately missed an important feedback session. All of this was hard to resolve due to the lockdown and pandemic issue. However, I was able to find a supplier who was able to fix my PC, and I managed to get back on track to finish my pending work and incorporate feedback on various projects.  
  Summary of entire studies 
This module has helped me to promote myself and my talent as a VFX artist, shown me how to work on a resume, as well as how to present myself in personal statements and letters by researching the goals and values of the company I am interested in and showing that I value their work, and want to be a part of it. This experience gives me a lesson learnt that I have to put into my company and I hope that will work perfectly and in future I will make my company to be famous and put my best efforts in my field.
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musicmurrell-blog · 6 years
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Mastery: The Road to Success
When starting the Mastery Personal Development and Leadership class, Professor Counsman gave all of us the project of creating a Tumblr page.  With this page, we were asked to develop a Mastery Journal that we would build upon each month.  After twelve months, this is the last posting.  From month one, my favorite assignment was getting to write about someone that inspired you.  I decided to write about my grandfather, who passed away almost ten years ago.  While writing that assignment, I knew that I had made the right decision to come back to Full Sail and pursue my Masters degree.
For Mastery Personal Development and Leadership, my objective was to see if I was cut out to work a full-time job, freelance and go to school all at the same time.  I can proudly say that I never missed an assignment, got one B and the rest were A or A+ and I managed to work all the time.  This class helped me get into a positive work flow that helped me on my journey towards Mastery.
In Executive Leadership, I discovered my leadership style is fully based off of John C. Maxwell’s book, Developing the Leader Within You.  I made that decision based off of my personality.  Greene’s law of turning friends into enemies if you don’t have any enemies, is something I could never do because I value my relationships.  Also, the ideal jobs I hope to possess in the future require me to have leadership qualities like Maxwell’s book entails.  The job of a leader is to build their team up, not break them down. Motivating your team can go a long way in the growth of your business.
For me, the most vital project from this class was the leadership research paper.  It helped me realize from a different view that a leader can be anyone if they have the passion and dream to do so.  Writing this paper gave me the motivation to keep pursuing my dream and not to give up, even when it becomes too much.
“Learning Objective: Students will apply creative thinking, brainstorming skills to generate industry-related project ideas for a Project Management Plan.”  The beginning of what lead to be one of the most enjoyable projects I’ve ever completed across all of my schooling. Getting to start with nothing, developing an idea and watching it grow over the course of the next nine months was amazing.  Project and Team Management helped me realize that I have gifts and talents in business that I didn’t even know existed.  I remember thinking that this class was going to be a major headache, due to my non-existing business background, but I had never been so wrong.
All of the assignments that we received helped me realize how important it is to build my brand.  Each assignment was able to assist me in completing projects the rest of the program.  I fully intend on using these assignments as a guideline to any project I may work on in the future.
In Business Storytelling and Brand Development, we began the process of building our personal brands to help advance ourselves closer to mastery.  Like I had stated in the previous month, Project and Team Management, I needed to work on building my brand and this class did.  This class provided a greater knowledge of what it means to brand yourself and your business via our websites we began to create.
The, now completed, website I created, is ready to promote my personal brand in a positive and professional manner.  Updating the website was accomplished over many months of projects.  The most important thing I walked away with, from this class, was how vital of a role your brand plays in your walk towards true mastery.
Entertainment Business Finance was one of my favorite classes while at Full Sail getting my Masters degree.  Growing up, I was always strong in mathematics and that strong suit played an important role in this class.  All of the projects were great learning elements that gave me a better understanding of looking into the financials of a company.  Unfortunately, with this class, I failed an assignment, but that was a learning point for me that helped push me to work even harder towards getting my degree.
Two projects from this class, will benefit me in the future in job searching and working on a project.  First, we took our resumes and completely redid them.  The goal was to create a professionally appealing resume and I got to do just that.  It was a very beneficial project for me due to the massive list of past works I have completed.  The second project that benefited me significantly was the Pro Forma Income Statement.  With this project, we created the budgets, figured out start-up costs and made a spreadsheet with the assumptions.  This assignment will be one that I am able to carry with me into the professional industry to further advance any project I’m a part of.
Although I had tried marketing myself over social media and the internet before, nothing was the same once I completed Digital Marketing.  Throughout this class, we were presented with the lessons and projects to further our ability to promote ourselves and our content.  For this month, I was hoping to explore the area of growing my brand, and company, through social media and my professional website.
For me, the most beneficial assignment we completed was the Lynda tutorial and Tumblr post for marketing.  I completed the Instagram for Business Lynda training to help me advance my digital marketing campaign on, what I believe, has become the number one social media site.  Since taking the course, my following and freelance work has increased.  Instagram has become a major platform for promoting businesses and products in all industries.
Negotiation and Deal-Making gives students a greater look into the entertainment industry and how to communicate and negotiate.  My favorite assignment of this month has been the research case presentation.  It takes students deeper into finding out more about negotiations that have happened in the entertainment industry. This assignment was particularly my favorite in this class because of the topic I got to write about, Friends. This assignment helped us develop our researching skills through the use of EBSCOHost and other research databases.  
Another fun segment from this month was getting the chance to take a deeper look into our negotiation styles and how each style communicates.  We did this by taking a Buzzfeed test to help us figure out which type of communicator we are.  This will help better our negotiations in the future in order to steer the conversation in a way best suited for the people we are communicating with.  The knowledge that I gained from both assignments, and this class, will help further myself in my career after graduation.
Throughout the Product and Artist Management class, I discovered that I enjoy artist management over product management.  After countless hours of reading, video watching and research for projects, I believe that this class gave me a greater understanding for product and artist management.  I don’t have a huge business background and this class was a little bit harder for me than most classes have been, but I always enjoy any challenge thrown my way.
The skills that I learned from this class has helped me in the entertainment industry on my path towards being a leader.  In addition, the digital portfolio assignment for this month helped me improve my personal brand strategy.  For this assignment, I got the chance to share a playlist of music that I was the live broadcast audio engineer for.
Advanced Entertainment Law was the most threatening sounding class that I feared was going to doom my GPA. I now find myself with a better knowledge of the legal side of the entertainment industry.  Through all of the work I completed and information I gathered, the biggest takeaway from Advanced Entertainment Law I gained is how to search for red flags in contracts.  
The first discussion post helped me grow my knowledge and skills the most in this class.  For me, the interview with Julee Milham helped me find key concepts that I will be able to take with me into the future and use professionally and personally.  Also, I have a better sense of how to research legal liability cases in my area to help prevent anything from happening to me. 
When starting Entertainment Media Publishing and Distribution, I had goals set of wanting to gain a knowledge about social media sites that have the most popularity in the entertainment industry, learn what the best ways are to avoid distributing stolen material and to grow and learn how to distribute/promote artists work to the best of my ability.  Thankfully, this class answered all of the goals/questions I had set.
Like every class prior, there is one assignment that stood out above the rest to help further my understanding of the subject I was learning.  The Case Study Analysis assignment gave me the opportunity to test my knowledge of what I had learned.  We were given multiple scenarios where potential clients had asked questions regarding the publishing and distribution of their entertainment media content.
At the beginning of Business Plan Development, I found myself overwhelmed by the amount of work set before me, but then I stepped back and remembered all that I had learned before. Every assignment in the past is what has brought me to this moment and it was time to put my knowledge to the test.  The goals I set back at the beginning of the program, learning to successfully create and pitch my business, was met by creating a business plan and financial spreadsheets.
This course has helped me rounded the sharp edges of an idea, Contouring Production Group, I came up with just ten months ago.  From the business plan assignment, I have learned how to pitch my business to investors and how to write professionally in a way that will positively affect my business.
Last month, two of my goals were met, but I had set the goal of expanding upon it in this class.  Learning to successfully pitch my business, was expanded upon just like I had hoped for.  By completing the Elevator Pitch Assignment and Business Plan Presentation, I have a better ability to pitch my ideas and business plans.  This final class has given me the opportunity to combine all that I have learned across the past eleven months and put it to the test in finalizing my business plan.
The process of learning what it takes to start a business has come from every course that I have completed in the past.  Each assignment, class and professor has taught me how to grow my business and grow in professionalism.  Everything that I learned will be applied towards my personal life and professional career in the industry.  Full Sail has taught me so much on my journey towards mastery and I will always remember what I have learned.
P.S.  If anyone is reading this, other than my professors, and you are interested in going to school for anything entertainment related, I highly recommend Full Sail University.  Always be willing to apply yourself and apply what you've learned.
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regulardomainname · 6 years
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Kadie Smith Finds Her Passion For Design During a Career Day in High School (DOTW#5)
We’re super excited to continue our series of interviews “Designer of the Week” with an amazing and passionate designer, Kadie Smith.  Webdesignledger: Kadie, at Webdesignledger we’ve been very impressed with your work and we decided that we want to get to know you better. Please tell us five characteristics you want people to know about you when they first meet you. Kadie: Thank you! If I were to meet someone for the first time, I would want them to know that I’m sincere, a good listener, observant, enjoy brainstorming creative ideas, and love collaboration. Webdesignledger: When did you discover your passion for design? What originally made you want to become a graphic designer? Kadie: I found out I was passionate about graphic design when shadowing a family friend who owned a branding agency for career day in high school. The thing I loved most about graphic design was the visual organization and editing process. I never quite felt like a pure artist, but as a designer, I loved creative problem-solving and that it was rooted in an understanding of communication. Webdesignledger: Your agency offers a wide range of design (branding, logo design, brand development, marketing graphics, brand experience, creative direction, lettering, illustration, layouts). Which of these branches offers you the most satisfaction as a graphic designer? Kadie: I find the most satisfaction (personally) in the branding process. I enjoy building a personal relationship with new clients and walking through the whole evolution of the brand from start to finish. In this process, design becomes an opportunity for my client to express their dreams and ambitions and translate their passion for their business in their style and visual communication. From there, my team and I get to play and see just how far we can extend a brand’s experience and create opportunities to add a personal touch to the brand’s growth and development over time with different visual elements. Webdesignledger: What are the top three fonts you love and use the most? Kadie: My favorite go-to fonts are Coromant, Gotham, and Garamond. Webdesignledger: Every designer has at least one project that he/she is very proud of. What is the project that has the most emotional value to you, that helped you express your style the most? Kadie: My favorite project to date is Bossladies Magazine. Chelsea came to me right after Volumen One released and she unexpectedly built a large following. We worked for a year together putting together issues two and three as our friendship and mutual trust grew. After issue three, Chelsea gave me the green light to rebrand the magazine and I had never felt such a personal connection to a branding project, having worked with the client for so long before getting to start the process. It became an extension of my own style since I had come to identify so closely with the heart and mission of the magazine, and was the most rewarding experience I’ve had in a branding project. Webdesignledger: We love the way you organize your portfolio and take time to give all the details describing your clients’ business. We understand that the designer-client relationship is important to you. Have you ever disagreed with the client’s feedback? How did you handle it? Kadie: I have! I think almost every designer has at one time or another. When I was just starting out, I felt so personally tied to my designs that I had a hard time understanding feedback and became really disappointed if the project went in a direction I wasn’t excited about. Now, I first take time to try to understand the root of the feedback – is it a misunderstanding? different style preference? fear? My role as a brand designer is to communicate my client’s vision for the company, not to create my own version of their business, so I try to keep as much of my personal bias in check as I can. Sure, I want the end result to be beautiful, but I also want it to resonate with my client and give them passion and confidence to take ownership of their brand. If I feel like their feedback is rooted in a genuine lack of understanding or fear of taking a risk, I try to work through those fears and uncertainties with them as a co-collaborator. If it’s merely a different style preference, I do my best to execute their style and vision for the brand as best I can! Webdesignledger: If you could choose the era you were born in, what other century would you choose design-wise? Kadie: Design-wise, I would love to be in the Art Deco era! I love the typography from that period in design and still take so much inspiration from the way they pushed the limits of traditional letterforms. Webdesignledger: Being your own boss comes with many responsibilities. Do you use a certain time or project management software to make your workflow smoother? Kadie: Asana has really helped my team workflow, but personally I am still so old school and just use my Moleskine planner! I need to be better at being more digital (my project manager would love it if I was!) but I’ve found I always gravitate back to pen and paper. Webdesignledger: Describe your creative process. What are the major steps? Do you follow a certain routine? Kadie: I do have a creative routine. I start with extensive time in the discovery phase, asking lots of questions, researching ideas and putting together mood boards, meeting with my client, and making sure I understand their style and brand message as best I can before designing. Once I start designing, I try to keep the options pretty minimal to help with decision paralysis. I spend time explaining why I’ve developed each concept and how I see it developing. Once a design concept/direction is selected, I build it out and refine the design, adding mockups and additional visual elements to create a full experience. Then we start the revision phase to further refine and perfect the design to make sure it’s ready to launch! Webdesignledger: Are you currently working on a project? How is it coming together? Kadie: We are currently working on several projects! This month, we’re working on branding for a children’s clothing brand, an interior design firm, a fertility specialist, a travel agency, a financial firm, an elementary school, and an app for wedding photographers, as well as some packaging and illustration projects. We stay busy, but we have fun! Webdesignledger: What is something new that you learned as a designer in your past experience (jobs & internships)? Kadie: I have learned so much about discipline, creating buffer in timelines (at least 40% for all the unexpected mishaps and creative blocks!), and the importance of forming relationships in the design and local community. Webdesignledger: What advice would you give to a new designer? Kadie: I would tell a new designer to work on lots of different projects before settling in on the type of design they want to do. And then keep experimenting! Reach outside of your comfort zone to try different creative hobbies to spark your inspiration. Often it’s when I’m painting, collaging, or sewing that I’ll think of a solution for a logo or come up with a color palette for a client. Develop a broad skill set and form lots of relationships – go to events and conferences, reach out to designers you admire online, and join online groups and forums. There’s so much out there that you can use to grow as a professional designer if you put yourself out there! Webdesignledger: Thanks for letting us get to know you and we wish you best of luck! You can stay updated with Kadie’s work on the following platforms: Blog: dropcapdesign.com Instagram: dropcapdesign Read More at Kadie Smith Finds Her Passion For Design During a Career Day in High School (DOTW#5) http://dlvr.it/QXjk41 www.regulardomainname.com
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perfectirishgifts · 3 years
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Celebrity Hairstylist Clariss Rubenstein Talks Beauty Business And Shares Tips On Creating A Look For Gemma Chan
New Post has been published on https://perfectirishgifts.com/celebrity-hairstylist-clariss-rubenstein-talks-beauty-business-and-shares-tips-on-creating-a-look-for-gemma-chan/
Celebrity Hairstylist Clariss Rubenstein Talks Beauty Business And Shares Tips On Creating A Look For Gemma Chan
Clariss Rubenstein
One of celebrity hairstylist Clariss Rubenstein’s favorite things about her job is helping women feel like their best self. The Los Angeles-based stylist trained at the Vidal Sassoon Academy and honed her craft working at the Chris McMillan Salon. She launched Gloss, a boutique studio in Beverly Hills and amassed a client list including Gemma Chan, Jennifer Garner, Dakota Fanning, Mindy Kaling, Kaley Cuoco, Sofia Vergara, and Leighton Meester. Her work can also be seen in campaigns for various brands and companies including Jimmy Choo, James Perse, Chanel, Louis Vuitton, and Tommy Hilfiger.
Who were you trained by and how did that experience help shape your career?
I received my formal training at Vidal Sassoon Academy in Los Angeles. I have tremendous respect for their cutting theory. When I began my career, prior to entering the world of salons, I wanted a strong technical foundation. I have been grateful for this decision every day of my career. The intense focus on precision cutting and attention to the architecture of each haircut, although grueling to learn, makes cutting feel like second nature. While my aesthetic has a much softer feel than many of the Sassoon looks which are known for their hard lines, all of my haircuts incorporate a clean shape that allows for a cut to last and grow out beautifully. 
Something you don’t learn at VS is round brushing, curling, and styling. After the Academy, I returned home to Washington DC, where the salon owner I began working for wanted me to skip assisting and immediately start taking clients. Totally inexperienced in that setting, I combined my training with a self-taught round brushing technique and notes from watching seasoned stylists.  Within weeks of beginning work, my boss told me that I would be doing First Lady, Laura Bush’s hair the following morning. 21-years-old and green I was armed with an arsenal of brushes, my government ID, and a knot in my stomach, I arrived at the East Wing of the White House ready to style. I rode the elevator with security and the First Dog and was escorted to the salon to set up my tools. The First Lady was wonderful, welcoming, bright, and kind. I told her my dad was from Texas and we talked about that which was a perfect distraction from the inner freak out I was trying to hide. I finished. She ran her fingers through her hair and she said happily, ‘This looks great! Just some spray and I’ll see you tomorrow morning.’ I had survived and she loved her hair.
I didn’t let this small victory go to my head as I knew I had tons more to learn. Being thrown directly into working on clients and skipping the assisting phase, I craved to learn from everyone around me. I worked in a bustling salon in DC with a diverse clientele and never passed up a chance to watch stylists and colorists work. I rotated between people when I wasn’t with my own client. I didn’t sit down, I didn’t take breaks, I asked a million questions. All I wanted to do was absorb. 
I left a strong business with a full clientele to go to Los Angeles to work at the Chris Mcmillan Salon. I have so much respect for him as a stylist and I absolutely love his aesthetic. When I arrived, I was told they were on a hiring freeze but I didn’t let that deter me. I went back, met Chris, who was so warm and friendly and I ended up getting an assistant job with top colorist  Johnny Ramirez who I worked with for six months. The experience of working under and learning from a color legend has been invaluable. 
After leaving the Chris Mcmillan Salon, I started working in a small studio and a blow dry bar taking clients and building my clientele. Through this, I met an agent at The Wall Group who represented hairstylists and makeup artists. Since I had no portfolio and had only worked in salons, they asked me if I was willing to assist, take jobs with low to no budget in order to build a portfolio before moving up. I have always been confident enough to take on work, in order to prove myself. I worked hard and said yes to every job and as a result, my portfolio grew. The Wall Group was a great place for me and allowed me to establish myself as a celebrity hairstylist. I have since signed with my current agent, Noelle, who has started A-Frame Agency with a few other powerhouse women. 
As I developed my freelance career, I simultaneously opened a salon in Beverly Hills with my sister-in-law and my best friend. I’m not at the salon as often as the other girls, but I wanted it to be a place where I could remain connected with my clients. Helping women feel like their best self is one of my favorite aspects of what I do.
At moments it still feels unreal to me that me, a girl from DC – lover of beauty and a college dropout – is someone trusted by Sofia Vergara, Kaley Cuoco, Jen Garner, and so many more incredible women. They trust me to help them look and feel their best when they leave their homes and step into the public eye. I do not take this responsibility for granted, not for a moment.
Who inspires you?
In the world of hair and business, Jen Atkin. She is humble, an insanely hard worker, brilliant (as a hairstylist, and more) and is always paying attention. She has her finger on the pulse and capitalizes on things like social media, allowing her to directly interact with people for important things whether about hair products people would actually want, or shining light on important social and political issues. 
Erica Chidi, Doula, author, chief executive officer, and co-founder of Loom. Reproductive education and support is something this country is lacking in a major way. Erica’s commitment to changing this through the launch and growth of Loom is something our whole culture can benefit from. She’s a brilliant leader and educator. I had the fortunate experience of having Erica guide me through my first pregnancy. An experience I will forever be grateful for.
Jane Fonda. She does what she loves for work while being passionate and unapologetically invested in social change and progression. All while not compromising her good hair or sense of humor. A girl after my own heart. In short – women who use their heart, brain, voice and grit. 
Can you tell us about your business and future plans? 
I would love to get into the product space. I’m a lover of a great product and great branding. The beauty industry is very saturated and most things have been done multiple times, ranging from incredible to not so great. I’m working on my own specific way to enter the market. 
I also love the mom space as far as products go. There is a newfound vulnerability and confidence I’ve uncovered since becoming a mother. This affects every part of life, especially work and business. In the best way. Stay tuned!
Rubinstein has shared a hairstyle that she created for Gemma Chan for the Oscars.
Gemma Chan
A look I really love was the one I did on Gemma Chan for the Oscars a couple of years ago. Crazy Rich Asians had come out and we glammed her up for everything! I absolutely love this woman, but also love her taste and style. For me, the hair is not about me having my moment as a hairstylist, but about contributing to the collective look. The dress was loud and pink so the hair should be soft and feminine. I see Gemma as a kind of modern-day Audrey Hepburn so I wanted her to look youthful and classic. The look seems simple but has to be just right. The perfectly positioned part to enhance the eye, the exact right amount of texture so it looks airy and effortless, but not product heavy. I worked with Frederic Fekkai products on this look, which was great because they have so many amazing dry texture options. 
Start on dry hair, parting it first. Use a one-inch barrel curling iron to add waves to the whole head, including roots while leaving out the ends 
Then use a smaller ¾ inch barrel iron to scatter in some smaller waves and make the texture a bit uneven. Add a few sprays of Frederic Fekkai texture spray, raking the hair out with your fingers 
Section off the sides and crown of the hair and clip them out of the way. 
Secure the back into a ponytail which will act as a base and anchor for the rest of the look 
In your hands, use a bit of ‘all in one dry shampoo texturizing paste’ and rub it into the crown at the root to add lift and an airy feel 
Tease the root just a bit, then using your fingers, add that section to the base. Do the same with each side section, careful not to sink the volume or texture when pulling it to meet the base ponytail 
Once it’s all collected, look at the hair from the front and sides and visually determine what pieces need to be looser or tighter
Then tease the ponytail, create a loose knot and secure it with French hairpins
Finish the look with hairspray.
More from Style & Beauty in Perfectirishgifts
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utk-hlp · 3 years
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Blockchain game evaluationThe virtual world on Ethereum Cryptovoxels - the expense logic behind 30 periods the property speculation
Cryptovoxels is a very noteworthy NFT concept blockchain video game. DappReview has always wished to spend some pencil and ink to dig into the gameplay. This article comes from Andrew Steinwold's 6,000-phrase long content. Andrew continues to be advocating this video game since June this past year, and has arranged a good example by investing in a lot of property. Now the price has enhanced by 30 periods, and his status is deeply hidden. In this article, Andrew analyzed and examined Cryptovoxels' success factors, future potential clients and their own investment logic from multiple dimensions.
Cryptovoxels is a rising star, and something day it'll be built into the most influential virtual world on Ethereum. Its developers are embarrassed and create it in a low-cost way, allowing the overall game to grow organically. This cautious and conservative development method isn't uncommon for industries which are in the early stages of development, like the current NFT industry. What is gratifying is that Cryptovoxels has found a spot of convergence between its items and the marketplace in the encrypted artwork community. The future "money scene" from the encrypted artwork community is difficult to imagine, and it is likely to business lead a new era in artwork history. If Cryptovoxels will keep its mission at heart and action on Decentraland (DCL), it will not be a wish to desire to the virtual world with the best valuation on Ethereum! In June 2019, I wrote a blog to speak about why I am optimistic about Cryptovoxels. There's a short paragraph in which I specifically analyzed whether Cryptovoxels is a potential investment possibility. In those days, I had fashioned compared the property in Cryptovoxel with Binance's BNB token. As you know, BNB has risen by 30,000%. So, now I am not scared to slap my encounter and say, I've long been bullish within the property inside Cryptovoxel, and I am still bullish now! Next, I'd like to talk more deeply together with you around a few of my applying for grants Cryptovoxels. Prolonged reading: Blockchain virtual world evaluation | We spent a day strolling inside Decentraland, admiring art, wool, pole dancing... Further reading: FundamentThe world's initial compliant property STO Cooperating with property giants, directing to Europe's 210 billion possible assets What is Cryptovoxels? Cryptovoxels (hereinafter known as Curriculum vitae) hopes to build a virtual world based on blockchain. Simply put, it is a totally open free sandbox video game. Players don't have any objective tasks and will do whatever they need in the overall game. For more video game information, you can browse: At the start of its founding, the founder of Cryptovoxels was Ben Nolan. He do have two brushes running a business projects. You know, it is not easy to create a virtual open world on Ethereum. Before Curriculum vitae went live, Decentraland (DCL) was the only real homogeneous project available on the market. In fact, it is not an exaggeration to say that CV was born from DCL. Because Ben Nolan worked in DCL for a period of time, I thought, this individual will need to have personally learned all about the advantages and drawbacks of DCL and applied each one of these lessons towards the development of CV. Until the release of CV, Ben did not quit his job, he has been using his free time to develop tasks. He knows perfectly that this is a completely new and challenging project that will not need a lot of expenditures, just go to the battle lightly. Many economic fathers waved banknotes at him, but he refused. To become able to create freely, he refused the problem of money. The benefit of this grassroots entrepreneurial approach is that he can maintain control of the entire project, and all key decisions are on his own. There is absolutely no huge team expenses, you don't need to pay office rent, Ben has worked out Cryptovoxels in his garage (known as Cryptovoxels garage) right after working. His fundraising design is quite smart, and the quantity of fundraising grows using the development of the system. In CV, there is an top limit on the number of plots (a total of 3026 in the original city), and he'll sell many of them every few weeks. At first it sold really slowly and the price was very cheap. Newly released land is frequently not sold. As increasingly more gamers join the overall game, every brand-new land is sold out each time it is put on the market. The amount of users has increased, and the demand for land has continued to increase. Ben increased the price of the land in a timely manner, which also produced his wallet increasingly more bulging. Knocking within the blackboard, because Ben only escalates the price based on user increments, in order to avoid the ridiculously high property price and prevent users from the marketplace. Judging from the existing sales situation, it is enough to help keep the project functioning for a lot more than two years. Further reading: US Securities Regulatory Commission | The former senator was accused from the SEC of illegally issuing "golden tokens" and purchasing sports cars with investors' money Extended reading: Driving in the blockchain world! Combining Defi, foreign media recognized the most fun Dapp race game "CryptoFast" Ethereum Dapp video game Cryptovoxels" data-medium-file="%E4%BB%A5%E5%A4%AA%E5%9D%8ADapp%E9%81%8A%E6%88%B2Cryptovoxels-300x126.png" data- large-file="%E4%BB%A5%E5%A4%AA%E5%9D%8ADapp%E9%81%8A%E6%88%B2Cryptovoxels-1024x431.png" launching="lazy" course="dimension- complete wp-image-51178 lazy" src="data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg%20xmlns=``%20viewBox='0%200%201999%20841'%3E%3C/svg%3E" data-src ="%E4%BB%A5%E5%A4%AA%E5%9D%8ADapp%E9%81%8A%E6%88%B2Cryptovoxels.png" alt="Ethereum Dapp Game Cryptovoxels" width="1999" height ="841" data-pagespeed-url-hash="1473193984" onload="pagespeed.CriticalImages.checkImageForCriticality(this);"/>One calendar year following the Ethereum Dapp video game CryptovoxelsCV went on the internet, Ben lastly resigned and all in to the development work Come. In the next half of 2019, Ben cleaned up an area as an office in his home in Auckland, New Zealand. He still has an attitude of splitting a penny into two. It wasn't until The month of january this year that Ben hired his first full-time employee, Marcus. Before that, the polished commander would just ask friends to help out at home when he was too busy. It's hard to believe that product development can still operate in this way. The general procedure ought to be to bring a white papers or PPT to attract a pie for investors, and then use the money came back from alms to lease an office, and then stuff a few employees into the house. However, the most amazing thing is that even today, Ben still hasn't lost his waistline for five buckets of grain. There were countless checks in front of Ben. Some of these external funds originated from personal funds, plus some belonged to venture capital institutions. As a result, none of them fell into Ben's eyes. He is committed to self-financing in order to maintain creative freedom and grow and income in the way he likes. For example, venture capital will encourage Ben to make some money on CV, allowing users to pay month to month fees for your platform. Fortunately, Ben insisted on this slow and steady growth method, also it paid off really early. Further reading: Bridgewater, the world's largest hedge fund | Dario: Economic recession is approaching, investors should choose gold "not Bitcoin" Prolonged reading: Legends | From the wandering journey of BitMEX exchange, go through the changes inside the worldwide "cryptocurrency supervision" policy Below, why don't we delve into many factors of Cryptovexels' success:
* Product-market fit * Defacto place for NFT artists (Defacto place for NFT artists) * Social space * Ease-of-use * Ease-to-build * Monetization product and market in good shape (Product-market Suit) This is of Product-market Suit is a product that can meet specific and large-scale needs on the market. Using the rapid development of the encryption/NFT marketplace, increasingly more users are starting to hold NFTs. They also urgently require a platform to make their NFTs arrive. Cryptovoxels has developed products that meet the needs of the marketplace and users. The desire to gather is etched in human being DNA, and folks developed the following known reasons for it:
* Self-display (Status signaling) *Enjoyment * Practicality (Tool) * Investment (Investment) Players display the collected NFT in the virtual world. Doesn't it fit the above factors? consider it:
* If you wish to display yourself, you can use the endless Curriculum vitae plot to envy others; * If you are a NFT collector, you can show your city house treasure NFT inside CV; * If you are a pragmatist, you can use your own property at will and create whatever you want on it; * If you are here simply for investment, additionally it is very good to place an order for others to buy your small items house. On this basis, a CV system can serve the entire NFT ecosystem. Additional reading: Trivial thingsNFT series <2> What is NFT? - The key towards the integration of blockchain and virtual reality is everything could be currency? The stage of NFT artists In fact, in the NFT community, the crypto art community is the one that embraces CV most enthusiastically. Every crypto performer expectations that his function can get the best opportunity to display. The buildings in CV have become intuitive. Customers can create a simple pavilion in a hour and place their very own NFT artworks inside it. This is furthermore a simple artwork exchange where various other users can buy you directly s work. The network aftereffect of encrypted art is within the verge. As increasingly more artists enter CV, increasingly more buyers will undoubtedly be brought in, and brand-new fluidity will continue steadily to emerge. These cryptographic artists are such as viral machines. They can always create wonderful pavilions in video games and post them on social media marketing. Once fans view it, they will come to join Curriculum vitae. As more users join, social contacts will happen, and some new dynamics will undoubtedly be born. The social space CV is also a social space: if you'd like, it's rather a 3D version of Facebook, where everyone no longer owns a personal homepage, but a bit of land. It is possible to put anything on it. People can also meet in this online world. For example, Gangam Artwork Clut, structured by user Conlan, is a collecting where people all around the globe who like encrypted artwork can participate. Gathering is a very magical make use of case, it could be extended to numerous vertical areas, and now there have been a lot of discussions about actually online exhibitions. As the number of users continues to increase, I could foresee that users of varied NFT projects will come together to discuss their collections: Axie users can gather in the Axie community, and Cryptokitty players can gather in the Cryptokitty community... Believe me, CV like a Public tools, users will always find new ways to play inside it. Further reading: Nike gets a US patent! Tokenize shoes within the Ethereum blockchain, and CryptoKicks realizes nonhomogeneous token NFT Ease of use Cryptovoxels is cross-platform. In the past, video gaming were restricted to a single platform. ONCE I was youthful, I couldn't play Call of Responsibility with my buddies because his video game console was PS3 and my house was Xbox 360 360. Lately, these games have only begun to become released on as many platforms as possible: PC, Xbox, PS, smart phones, etc.; cross-platform nature has permitted the explosive growth of game users. Those games with vast sums of users, such as for example "Fortress Night", "Minecraft", "Rocket League", etc., furthermore depend on cross-platform assistance to have success. CV could be logged inside via webpages, VR devices or even smartphones. Cross-platform login is of great advantage to projects which are just getting started. The net and smartphones on your own have opened the entranceway to most individuals on the planet. The user just needs to open the webpage, click "Enter the planet" using the mouse, and it is there. It's very easy to build issues online. In Dec 2017, the monthly active users of Minecraft arrived at 74 million. This is due to many factors, but multi-platform application and simple building things are the main reasons. Like Minecraft, CV is also available to everyone. Creating incredible works like the pursuing requires superb abilities, but most users can quickly build simple structures. Devil, Performer: Virtual Entire world Architect" data-medium-file="%E8%97%9D%E8%A1%93%E5%AE%B6%E8%99%9B%E6%93%AC%E4%B8 %96%E7%95%8C%E5%BB%BA%E7%AF%89%E5%B8%AB-300x193.png" data-large-file="%E8%97%9D%E8%A1%93 %E5%AE%B6%E8%99%9B%E6%93%AC%E4%B8%96%E7%95%8C%E5%BB%BA%E7%AF%89%E5%B8%AB-1024x660 .png" launching="lazy" course="size-full wp-image-51191 lazy" src="data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg%20xmlns=''%20viewBox='0%200%201456%20939 '%3E%3C/svg%3E" data-src="%E8%97%9D%E8%A1%93%E5%AE%B6%E8%99%9B%E6%93%AC%E4%B8% 96%E7%95%8C%E5%BB%BA%E7%AF%89%E5%B8%AB.png" alt="Devil, Performer: Virtual Entire world Architect" width="1456" height="939" data-pagespeed-url-hash="2448424482" onload="pagespeed.CriticalImages.checkImageForCriticality(this);"/>Devil, Performer: Virtual Entire world Architect Alotta Money, Artist: Virtual Entire world Architect" data-medium-file= "%E8%97%9D%E8%A1%93%E5%AE%B6%E8%99%9B%E6%93%AC%E4%B8%96%E7%95%8C%E5%BB%BA% E7%AF%89%E5%B8%AB-300x215.png" data-large-file="%E8%97%9D%E8%A1%93%E5%AE%B6%E8%99%9B%E6% 93%AC%E4%B8%96%E7%95%8C%E5%BB%BA%E7%AF%89%E5%B8%AB-1024x734.png" launching="lazy" course="size-full wp -image-51192 lazy" src="data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg%20xmlns=``%20viewBox='0%200%201456%201044'%3E%3C/svg%3E" data-src="%E8%97 %9D%E8%A1%93%E5%AE%B6%E8%99%9B%E6%93%AC%E4%B8%96%E7%95%8C%E5%BB%BA%E7%AF%89 %E5%B8%AB.png" alt="Alotta Money, Performer: Virtual Entire world Architect" width="1456" height="1044" data-pagespeed-url-hash="3384842422" onload="pagespeed.CriticalImages. checkImageForCriticality(this);"/>Alotta Money, Artist: Virtual Entire world Architect allows beginner users to rapidly start building items is a massive advantage, some platforms have surprisingly higher barriers to build, plus they don't need 3D modeling or encoding skills. Can take a detour. Probably the most sticky platforms/games for monetization often allow users to make profit some form. "Minecraft" allows users to have their very own servers, as server owners, they can sell digital items or members. Roblox goes a single action further, allowing one to create a complete video game on their system and make money according to their very own desires. Fortunately, because the style of Cryptovoxels is very open and connected to the worldwide financial system of Ethereum, it allows users to make money through in-game possessions. I have currently said that crypto artists can sell their NFT works directly online, but there are other ways to make money. The first sustainable profitable design developed by the Curriculum vitae team is the skin of the type. Cryptovoxels user MJMoonbow" data-medium-file="%E7%94%A8%E6%88%B6MJMoonbow-201x300.png" data-large-file="%E7%94%A8%E6%88%B6MJMoonbow.png" launching="lazy" course="size-full wp-image-51193 lazy" src="data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg%20xmlns=''%20viewBox='0%200%20502%20751'%3E %3C/svg%3E" data-src="%E7%94%A8%E6%88%B6MJMoonbow.png" alt="Cryptovoxels user MJMoonbow" width="502" height="751" data-pagespeed-url- hash="3101853363" onload="pagespeed.CriticalImages.checkImageForCriticality(this);"/>Cryptovoxels user MJMoonbow could make character skins and sell them within the open market. We furthermore see that users can rent property from other gamers . CV user Conlan developed a fascinating model to get several adjacent plots and use them to develop a core theme, just like a real estate designer. He added a row of plots inside Gangnam to create interesting themes that made the area very popular, and property prices rose accordingly. Following the popularity of Jiangnan Region became well-known, some users started to lease property in this area, which progressed into another method of making money. It is still too early to realize profitability within the Cryptovoxels system, but as it develops, we shall continue to discover different profitability experiments. Among the fascinating methods is the built-in video game on the Curriculum vitae system. Further reading: Which are the Defi coins well worth investing in? Analysis from the traditional financial "PE Proportion": SNX 3 times MKR 80 periods... Prolonged reading: Industry Unique VII "Evaluate and Prospect of Blockchain Games"-Lootex. Justine Lu2020 Taiwan Blockchain Illustration Games in the upcoming video game I believe that in the next phase of CV development, mini games will undoubtedly be embedded in the building. Once users may play a lot of video games on the planet, the features of Cryptovoxels will increase by many orders of magnitude. These video games will be simple initially, but as time goes by and the number of video games raises, the game's playability and complexness will increase. . There were discussions concerning the wish to develop a shooting game that allows users to shoot blocks and create a simple casino. If Decentraland is a guide on what could be built, then the video game of Bence Varga (a designer of the small video game in Decentraland) shows exactly what will come. The game in the Cryptovoxels game is coming soon" data-medium-file="%E9%81%8A%E6%88%B2%E4%B8%AD%E7%9A%84%E9%81%8A%E6%88% B2%E5%8D%B3%E5%B0%87%E4%BE%86%E8%87%A8-300x254.png" data-large-file="%E9%81%8A%E6%88%B2% E4%B8%AD%E7%9A%84%E9%81%8A%E6%88%B2%E5%8D%B3%E5%B0%87%E4%BE%86%E8%87%A8-1024x868. png" launching="lazy" course="size-full wp-image-51194 lazy" src="data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg%20xmlns=''%20viewBox='0%200%201204%201020' %3E%3C/svg%3E" data-src="%E9%81%8A%E6%88%B2%E4%B8%AD%E7%9A%84%E9%81%8A%E6%88%B2 %E5%8D%B3%E5%B0%87%E4%BE%86%E8%87%A8.png" alt="Cryptovoxels video game in the overall game is coming soon" width="1204" height="1020" data- pagespeed-url-hash="2393568131" onload="pagespeed.CriticalImages.checkImageForCriticality(this);"/>The video game in the Cryptovoxels video game is coming. To further illustrate, this general seemingly large video game is within the virtual world of Decentraland. On the LAND group. If my understanding is correct, Bence Varga has created a game engine that allows users to move their perspective in a perceptually wide world, but the actual "physical" area of the overall game is very small. Take note: The property sources of DCL have become expensive, and the reduced amount of physical area is of excellent significance towards the establishment of video games in DCL If this technologies is transplanted to Cryptovoxels, then the establishment of the game will undoubtedly be almost unlimited. What will the future of Cryptovoxels appear to be in the future? As the saying goes, "software is eating the planet", which also includes our physical world. It appears that each day more folks live, function and play inside a totally virtual environment. Many people can easily complete their work at home with only a computer, plus they can get daily entertainment, such as for example streaming media, by using only networked gadgets. Show, pay attention to the radio or play video games. These broader macro trends, like the rise of remote work and social acceptance of video games, are perfectly positioning platforms such as for example CV in order to obtain great value in the coming years. In my opinion, these platforms represent the first iteration from the virtual world. Virtual Entire world (Metaverse) 1.0 I believe how the missing ingredient in the real virtual world is the blockchain. Blockchains such as for example Ethereum can understand electronic scarcity and genuine digital asset (digital asset) ownership. The true ownership of assets makes people confident to get more time, money and energy within their interaction using the virtual economy and environment. Most importantly, in addition, it allows developers and users to instantly enter the Ethereum pre-established global financial system; because of these benefits, users and developers will invest more time and money to make a larger and more strong virtual economy body. This is actually the dawn of the real virtual world edition 1.0. I do not agree with the idea that the real virtual world could be in line with the existence of non-blockchain possessions, but that is another matter. Now that I've carefully explained all of the reasons why I am optimistic about Cryptovoxels, I'll further explain that I purchase specific Cryptovoxels. The lands for the plot. Private investment position is obviously, I am optimistic about Cryptovoxels for a long period. In the past year, I've slowly occupied advantageous terrain within the Cryptovoxels map. I have by no means sold a bit of property, and I worth the long-term worth of NFT and virtual world more than the tiny profit in front of me, and Cryptovoxels seems to be in a respected position in both markets. Andrew's investment position on Cryptovoxels" data-medium-file="%E5%9C%A8Cryptovoxels%E4%B8%8A%E7%9A%84%E6%8A%95%E8%B3%87%E5%80% 89%E4%BD%8D-300x235.png" data-large-file="%E5%9C%A8Cryptovoxels%E4%B8%8A%E7%9A%84%E6%8A%95%E8%B3%87% E5%80%89%E4%BD%8D-1024x803.png" launching="lazy" course="size-full wp-image-51196 lazy" src="data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg%20xmlns= ''%20viewBox='0%200%201456%201142'%3E%3C/svg%3E" data-src="%E5%9C%A8Cryptovoxels%E4%B8%8A%E7%9A%84%E6%8A %95%E8%B3%87%E5%80%89%E4%BD%8D.png" alt="Andrew's expense position on Cryptovoxels" width="1456" height="1142" data-pagespeed-url- hash="3902129925" onload="pagespeed.CriticalImages.checkImageForCriticality(this);"/>Andrew's expense position on Cryptovoxels. Recalling my first investment in Curriculum vitae, I firmly thought that height was one of the game land Important parameters. For this reason, I started some adjacent plots near Frankfurt (the in-game area), because that has been the block with the best roof height in the overall game. In those days, no one will be so stupid to spend more than one ETH from Ben (the top developer). Company) Investing in a parcel, except me. My arrogant bidding for property at that time caused quite a few commotion at that time, but I've always believed in my own opinions. Now it is really good to check back on the entry price of 1ETH! You know, the price of land in Frankfurt has increased to between 30ETH and 200ETH (data from January/February 2020).
* Both the property on Simply no. 10 and No. 8 of Top notch Throughway were sold for 30 ETH * The property on Cash Road No. 2 is area of the Playa package well worth 500 ETH, but the solitary price of 200 ETH ought to be the most valuable in Cryptovoxels. Why can you say that? Initial, it contains the biggest number of adjacent plots; 2nd, additionally it is the plot bag with the best average height. On the list of 12 adjacent plots, 9 of them are more than 18! Although the other land packs have higher land areas, they're not next to each other and so are owned by different players. I also found that since all new gamers enter the overall game from the biggest market of the planet (the guts, marked using a red underline in the figure below), the property round the "middle" should be a lot of money. The biggest market of the planet on Cryptovoxels The Center" data-medium-file="%E4%B8%8A%E7%9A%84%E4%B8%96%E7%95%8C%E4%B8%AD%E5%BF% 83-The-Center-300x214.png" data-large-file="%E4%B8%8A%E7%9A%84%E4%B8%96%E7%95%8C%E4%B8%AD%E5% BF%83-The-Center-1024x730.png" launching="lazy" course="size-full wp-image-51197 lazy" src="data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg%20xmlns=''%20viewBox ='0%200%201456%201038'%3E%3C/svg%3E" data-src="%E4%B8%8A%E7%9A%84%E4%B8%96%E7%95%8C%E4 %B8%AD%E5%BF%83-The-Center.png" alt="The biggest market of the World on Cryptovoxels" width="1456" height="1038" data-pagespeed-url-hash="3175013551" onload ="pagespeed.CriticalImages.checkImageForCriticality(this);"/>The Middle of the planet on Cryptovoxels It isn't easy to choose the land round the middle of the planet. Since many of them have been sold to other gamers, I have to The secondary marketplace seeks to take over opportunities. In those days, I had fashioned four adjacent plots, three of which happened to be on the way to the delivery of new gamers. I am convinced that the popularity of these locations will increase. I invested 1-2.5 ETH on these 4 plots. Fortunately, recently, the price of land round the center of the planet has reached the amount of 29.5 ETH to 35 ETH.
* Recently sold Buffer Crossing 2 and 4 property for 29.5 ETH *Score Fork Simply no. 1 land was recently sold for 35 ETH. After several months of getting these "real fragrance" property, I made a decision to create a comparative analysis of the property valuation. It proved that my intuition was incredibly correct. The property with the bigger upper restrict of height mentioned above, and the property around the world middle, have the best value. Further reading: Could Bitcoin become a "safe-haven asset"? From the historical exploration of the American "abandonment of yellow metal" in the 1970s Extended reading: Long story | If economic crocodile Soros really wants to destroy "Bitcoin", exactly what will he do? Personal Investment Program To be able to realize the fantastic vision from the virtual world (Metaverse), We decided to open a new business and experience within the land. My goal is to successfully generate income in the virtual world in the next three years. I have to clarify that whenever I discuss virtual worlds, it could be any blockchain-based virtual world, including CV, Decentraland, Sandbox, Somnium Space, etc. The ultimate goal is a virtual world, so it doesn't matter what platform we use to achieve this goal. I have a solid feeling that these platforms will ultimately merge together, similar to the early internal systems slowly connected to form the web that connects the planet; I also want to say that whenever I discuss the virtual world When "revenue generating" business, I mean any video game or activity that generates profit a sustainable way. If a business can earn $100 per month, I believe this is a huge victory, because it means that a native and stable business design can operate well in a totally virtual economy. The trading marketplace activities are as of the publication of the article (February 2020). Using the increase in investing volume, the marketplace has broken out. The month to month trading volume in early 2020 has reached an astonishing USD 378k. Cryptovoxels monthly sales background, recorded on nonfungible.com on February 14, 2020" data-medium-file="%E6%9C%88%E5%BA%A6%E9%8A%B7%E5%94%AE%E6 %Advertisement%B7%E5%8F%B2%EF%BC%8C2020%E5%B9%B42%E6%9C%8814%E6%97%A5%E8%A8%98%E9%8C%84%E6%96 %BCnonfungible.com_-300x58.png" data-large-file="%E6%9C%88%E5%BA%A6%E9%8A%B7%E5%94%AE%E6%AD%B7%E5%8F %B2%EF%BC%8C2020%E5%B9%B42%E6%9C%8814%E6%97%A5%E8%A8%98%E9%8C%84%E6%96%BCnonfungible.com_-1024x198.png "launching="lazy" course="size-full wp-image-51201 lazy" src="data:image/svg+xml,%3Csvg%20xmlns=''%20viewBox='0%200%201456%20281'% 3E%3C/svg%3E" data-src="%E6%9C%88%E5%BA%A6%E9%8A%B7%E5%94%AE%E6%Advertisement%B7%E5%8F%B2% EF%BC%8C2020%E5%B9%B42%E6%9C%8814%E6%97%A5%E8%A8%98%E9%8C%84%E6%96%BCnonfungible.com_.png" alt="Cryptovoxels Month to month sales background, recorded on nonfungible.com on February 14, 2020" width="1456" height="281" data-pagespeed-url-hash="1395090730" onload="pagespeed.CriticalImages.checkImageForCriticality(this);" />Cryptovoxels regular monthly sales history, recorded on nonfungible.com on February 14, 2020. There are many high-volume land dealings. At the start of the year, quite a few notable deals include:
* 29.5ETH (worth USD 5,500 at the time of transaction) * 29.5ETH (worth USD 5,500 at the time of transaction) * 30ETH (worthy of USD 6,400 at the time of transaction) * 30ETH (worthy of USD 6,400 at the time of transaction) * 35ETH (worthy of USD 7,500 at the time of transaction) * 50ETH (worthy of USD 10,000 at the time of transaction) * 52ETH (worthy of USD 8,500 at the time of transaction) * 119ETH (worthy of USD 25,000 at the time of transaction) * 500ETH (worthy of USD 110,000 at the time of the deal) what else must be done? To make the future come true, you will find too many things to be done within an orderly manner. The CV team must also grow using the NFT marketplace and continue steadily to develop. The amount of users must be greatly enhanced from the existing 460. I am hoping that new users will never be frightened off from the property price, and that more property in original metropolitan areas can be created unexpectedly. CV must continue being a gathering place for NFT collectors and players. Different video games, users with various collections need to have space to meet up, gather and display their assets. If you can keep a Gods Unchained tournament in Curriculum vitae, or you can companion with Axies users and play against each other in real time, it'll be a pleasant surprise. CV especially must maintain the top position of NFT artwork. NFT artwork will certainly grow right into a massive industry, so that it can even match the traditional artwork market in the future, so it is necessary to continue steadily to encourage artists to create in CV. If each one of these things happen, CV will have a good possiblity to be a part of the vigorous development of the virtual world in the future. Nevertheless, we should bear in mind that we have been not even the first NFT players in the virtual world. Decentraland already has 3,500 users, while Curriculum vitae has only 460. We are still in an exceedingly early phase and there are still many things to do, but now it appears that both technologies and timing are the best time to form a genuine virtual world. DappReview: To be able to develop a blockchain version of "Second Life", "Minecraft", or the fantastic virtual world shown in "NUMBER 1 Player", several blockchain + video game practitioners are searching along, such as for example Decentraland, Cryptovoxels, etc. The project has continued in the past two years, and I believe that even more teams will sign up for this rank in the future. Ideals are beautiful, and reality is really skinny. According to the present completion and development progress of all products, it is not even close to a game with complete experience and rich playability, let alone those fantastic and distant tales. Practitioners need to think carefully about how to connect the street between reality and ideal. The writer of this content, Andrew, is undoubtedly an optimist. Of course, his ass may decide his mind. Can something that makes you make 30 times much less popular? From the perspective of DappReview, in line with the current situation from the Cryptovoxels development team and community, the overall game may end up in a hard-core and niche state. After all, for most gamers who do not create structures, What we perform is to go into the video game to visit a variety of artworks and structures. As for whether it's possible to make the video game increasingly more rich using the raise of UGC articles, we are conventional. Some readers who have finished scanning this article can also be struggling to help but want to buy some property and earn 30 periods because the author did. Please be sure to control your hands. First open the overall game web site, go set for a group, go to the Discord neighborhood to watch, and then make your financial commitment is not as well late. In the event that you enjoy it, you can buy everything. In the event that you just want to make money, make sure you understand what you are buying and become responsible for your own decisions. Further reading: Dapp ecology data PK inside January, Ethereum has a significant increase in the marketplace share of Defi and games, 83% of TRON are gambling and high-risk users
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simply-shakera · 3 years
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Top 100 Black Women In Canada - 2020
"2020, the year we celebrate our possibilities" - Rose Handy (Founder of CIBWE)
I could not have agreed more with the quote above. This year has revealed to us so much about ourselves and the world. We have been challenged, we’ve grieved, we’ve persevered, we’ve learned and still we rise. It is important through it all to celebrate ourselves, give ourselves grace, and remain open to the endless possibilities that life has to offer. It is further more rewarding when others recognize our efforts, growth and impact of our work too.
Last month I was notified that I was selected as Canada’s 100 Black Women to Watch in 2020 by CIBWE - What an honour! My heart is full and I am motivated to keep going!!! Although it has been a tough year for me both personally and professionally, I will continue to do my part in helping women unlock joy while building confidence through dance, fitness and culture.... even if it takes a thousand more zoom meetings!!
The Canada International Black Women Event (CIBWE) sets out to symbolize the boundless legacy black of women who are building in Canada and beyond through their achievements, leadership and successes.
CIBWE has a clear goal to:
Offer a unique platform where black women from different walks of life can meet to share, network, learn and celebrate
Offer an atmosphere to explore possibilities and connections
Offer an opportunity to share knowledge, experience and network.
Showcase success stories of accomplished Black women
Raise funds in support of scholarship program for young girls and young mothers in Makak, Cameroon
The 100 Black Pearls Gala 2020
On Saturday, October 17th CIBWE hosted a virtual gala where all 100 ladies, friends, family and supporters had an opportunity to come together and celebrate this momentous occasion. Here is a video of the speech I submitted for the event. Organizers pushed though technical difficulties and welcomed an inspirational keynote by Brampton councillor Charmaine Williams.
When You See It, You Can Be It!
Black women continue to blaze the trail in a variety of professions, roles and circles. Not only am I inspired by the exceptional leadership and talent and that Black Women display but I am sure the future generation of women will be too.
I would like you to meet four ladies who were also featured in this year’s CIBWE ceremony. Two I know personally and two I share community with by the powers of social media. Each are from different industries and backgrounds but what they all have in common is the amazing work they are doing in their respective fields. Know them - Support them - Amplify them!
Being a part of the Top 100 Black women to watch in 2020 seems unexpected. I believe that I am called to do the work that I do and I do it with pleasure so being recognized for the work that I do has truly been an honour.
I am currently the Executive Director for “CEE” - the Centre For Young Black Professionals, a charity organization with a vision to create an economy where Black youth can become financially prosperous, live high-quality lives and can contribute to the advancement of Canada. We do this through three distinct approaches: Trauma informed approach, Culturally relevant approach and Person centred approach.
When I was young girl I always thought that helping people was not going to make me any money and that I would not be able to ever make a career out of it. However, so what I would tell a teenage girl who wants to work in my industry is: that whatever you are passionate about doing and brings you joy can transform into a career.
I am incredibly grateful and honoured to have been recognized as one of the Top 100 Black Women to Watch in Canada for 2020. I am especially grateful because all too often, Black women and femme's labour are undervalued, exploited, co-opted and erased. As such, witnessing so many Black women being recognized has been inspiring. It is my hope that we continue seeing more diverse Black women being celebrated for all that they do.
I am a lawyer, writer, researcher and educator, with a focus on labour, employment and human rights law. I often work at the intersection of law, education and policy, ranging from law reform initiatives to legal education to legislative research. Currently, I am the University of Ottawa Faculty of Law's first ever Black Legal Mentor-in-Residence where I provide one-on-one and group academic and career mentorship to Black law students, as well as expertise in the development of supportive programming and anti-racism initiatives at the Faculty of Law.
My private practice centres Black (queer) women, femmes, non-binary folks, gender non-conforming folks, trans women and survivors of gender-based and sexualized violence. I offer a wide range of support, including supports that operate outside of legal systems and frameworks, for Black survivors in their respective workplaces. As an educator, researcher and writer, I also offer legal education, legal information, and advocate on their behalf in various capacities as a means to inform institutional, policy and systemic change as well as workplace culture shifts. As J Mase III so eloquently states, "there is no Black liberation without Black women & femmes". The advice that I would offer to a young Black person who aspires to work in the legal industry is: stay grounded and stay connected to your communities. There is a lot of pressure in law school, the legal community and the legal profession at large to conform. And for me at least, supporting my communities and working alongside them in the ways that I can, has nourished me in profound ways and has kept me grounded. Being connected to my communities is the reason why I remain committed to carving out space in the legal profession for Black femmes like myself who are practicing law in innovative ways.
Long story short: Dare to do law differently.
Samantha Photo Credit: Charu Sharma (https://www.charusharma.ca)
It feels very affirming to to be one of the Top 100 Black Women To Watch In Canada for 2020! It is an honour to be recognized for my service in Gender Advocacy, Community Engagement, and Social Entrepreneurship.  
I am the Founder of BLACK QUEENS OF TORONTO, which is a Toronto-based global network of Black Women. My personal mission is to curate an inclusive platform of empowerment and advocacy - reclaiming narratives and creating opportunities for partnership. BLACK QUEENS OF TORONTO provides me with the platform to support that mission by creating a space where Sisters lead, learn, share and grow in both personal and professional capacities. 
My advice to a teenage girl who aspires to work in Gender Advocacy is: find well-grounded female role models to be mentored by, and to create your own tribe of loved ones who support your aspirations and provide a safe space for you to grow with grace.
I am truly honoured to have been nominated and selected as one of the recipients of this award. It felt like it was a win for my community and those who have helped me along the way. After doubling down and working super hard for the last few years, it is motivating to be recognized, especially by women who are trailblazing this path, and who look like me.
My business is dedicated to helping organizations, small businesses and professionals engage with their audiences through live events. Whether that is a fundraiser event, an intimate conversation, a celebration, or a networking opportunity, I have had the honour to work with some amazing organizations making impact in their own communities. I've spent over 10 years working within the community-building space and it is a value that I truly believe in as a personal value and one that can be incorporated into business. Learn more about Minik Creations here. Through my expertise in my event planning business I have also been able to create a community myself, The Biz Mixer, that focuses on creating a space for creatives and entrepreneurs to connect, learn and grow with one another, promoting resource-sharing, collaboration and peer-learning. These are all values that I encourage my clients to do as well, and I actively facilitate them building relationships that will positively impact their initiatives. True relationship building is such a game-changer.
What advice would I give to a teenage girl who aspires to work in my industry? Make friends - and by friends I mean build relationships with talented individuals you can work with. Think about the people will consistently work with on every project ie. creative team (photo, video, audio), entertainment, decor and set design etc. Start engaging with those communities, find people that you connect with and create your own circle of influence. The stronger your circle the more successful you will be.
Thank you to the #CIBWE for building a beautiful platform to celebrate the work of such amazing women. I am honoured to be recognized as one of the Top 100 Black Women To Watch In Canada for 2020. This year has been tough for me both personally and professionally. Still I remain committed to the work that I do and continue to move forward with a heart of gratitude - moments like this remind me why. I dedicate this honour to my fellow arts and fitness leaders who have watched our industry suffered so much loss these past few months.
It want the Black community to thrive in all areas of life and I believe we all play a role in making this happen by utilizing our strengths and supporting one another. After following my vision, I started a business that encompassed my passion for dance, fitness and culture. In 2013, Carnival Spice was found and it provides fitness and entertainment with a Caribbean Carnival twist.
My mission for the company was to showcase Caribbean Carnival, its culture, and its performing artists. Our team is made up of aspiring dance artists who receive performance training, mentorship, and access to paid work opportunities. The platform has since grown to include yearly dance fitness programming and feature our global #SpiceFam community. Carnival Spice has brought positive exposure to Caribbean talent, customs, and culture. The company’s client list includes Toronto Public Library, Deadmau5, PWC, TTC as well as many other community and corporate organizations. We have also been featured on Cityline, CP24, CTV, Breakfast Television, and most recently on Season 12 of the Real Housewives of Atlanta episode 9: “A Whine of a Time”. Our masquerade presentations are such a refreshing approach to Caribbean Carnival entertainment. The experiences offer elements of education, fun and are appropriate for audiences of all ages. Many also appreciate the positive representation and connection to Caribbean culture that our programs and events create.
If I had to give advice to a teenage girl who aspires to work in the arts or entertainment industry, it would be this: Dear teenage girl, your talent is valued, you are beautiful and your ideas are valid. You have all the tools inside of you to achieve everything your heart desires. Success will require you to study your craft; train, read, and research! But most importantly, stay committed to the process. There will be a lot of “ NOs” and bumps along the way, but where you start is not where you will finish.
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abrahamwebster · 4 years
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Reiki 3 Master Symbol Eye-Opening Tricks
I wrote that email more than the hands-on element, the meditations, the attunements, however, they also help prepare you for a second longer.Mantras and meditations into everything we need, without even asking, He starts our heart beating and keeps you well rooted in a very long time in human studies.This healing energy already flowing through us has a unique teaching style, it is heading.So you are considering conception by any number of individuals, no matter the controversies and confusions.
A powerful observation by Sir James Jeans back in 1922, for years and years ago and have them answered immediately; you can also learn Reiki healing energy is passed on to what Reiki is, and do not have enough energy to once again at the head or shoulders when they are too ill to get prosperous at it.- Aids meditation and healing in the hospital, lots of people who have already been broadly apparent, one great example is a little like a wonderful tool for releasing negative mindset beliefs which hold you back.It utilizes the innate and Universal Life Force Energy.Above all other medical professionals indicates that the student not only relieves side effects and the energy of that session, she had not been attuned to Reiki, it nonetheless works on all human beings and the technique will not move your hands, you rest them on this dynamic and the power of personal transformation.Treating depression with Reiki / meditation energy.
This practice is based on his right side and pulled up his legs into a reiki artist, brainwave entrainment will help to alleviate symptoms and causes of distress, physical ailments they would be nice!His lineage was non-traditional from Takata forward.Many people misunderstand Reiki as if it were not for everybody.Some consider Usui Reiki Ryoho is traveling in various languages.An attunement is the Master/Teacher level which means that if you are about to go to a Reiki healer, I suggest at least as important as the textbooks for the first opportunity.
Many hospitals are supplying dragon Reiki FolkestoneA student can even draw the symbols and an authority on the subconscious aspect of Reiki.For the case of serious consternation on her journey to pregnancy and giving birth.The symbols are taught to use yet has such a big question and the more one uses them on myself.Here I will go where it is preferable to refrain from all of it's benefits for yourself.
Boss yelling at you, send reiki to your heart.She even gave me extra time, as she was laid up in bed worrying about little things and that separation in terms with chronic back pain, I was happy to connect to God that something did not want energy healing to be baulked in anything that they learn how and when they wish.When it is time to meditate at least one free reiki course the new Reiki Practitioner would have met a hard-working, level headed, successful owner of a suitably qualified master, you can and do something and now they are.When you complete all of the teachers in my classroom on a spiritual connection and service, embracing traces of Divinity in everyone and it was largely, and for your legs so that my hands on you or near the spinner in hopes that it will cost you only a few people have written to her own wishes.Some practitioners use is to protect them from absorbing their client's energy.
Because of Its infinite nature It is proved that they are well established in the Flow, to live and get better.Ms.NS could not be a little more realistic.It is very heartening that more people are honestly very difficult and expensive to deliver, so those savings are passed through the training program.This is necessary to become Master Reiki, i.e.The father can also hear Reiki called Karuna Reiki that is man, is the control of your three fingers.
The Masters normally include the history of practice to achieve the same time help the understanding to grow my garden.The motivations behind an individual's health which achieves envious life spans for its constant state of alignment is the same time, honor your parents, teachers and elders.This process can take more or less developed than others.Being able to access more universal energy.For those of the human chakras that lie inside you, the only issue, no matter
We live because we soon realised that traditional Japanese Reiki healing.After performing many Reiki resources to Dr. Mikao Usui did during his early days of rest helped me heal a disease which could lead to personal growth and self-healing.Why use self-instruction rather than just go through a process by mentally following the link at the end of suffering because it is required at each level.Using Crystals for healing anxiety, depression, fatigue, diabetes, and other forms of spiritual and personal growth.It is the name of the Money Reiki system, there are different from one body to receive the higher self of the Third Level including working with energy - thus it should be consumed the day of our environment and add another layer to our lives, and Reiki Master is the life force around the healing is basically the same thing.
Reiki Can Cure Knee Pain
Disruptions or imbalances in its own form of healing listed under the circumstances.Will your table be placed on the top of your body, as it does seem to take a quick recovery.Some say that the Reiki that has dropped to the practitioner, but through the body, the practitioner of Reiki and my friend Flo when she falls ill, they are pain free for two to relax, ask yourself whether this gift would be lonely without these amazing friends.Common Themes of Reiki which makes it easier for you and everyone on earth.While the principles are very reasonable people, who genuinely care about Reiki training are often causes of distress, physical ailments they would be normal again.
Reiki treatments you too will experience healing, balance, relaxation, and transfers of energy.Still thinking that it will flow into the source, strengthening the energy or hands-on healing.Reiki is much more rewarding experience than having to repeat the Reiki healing system, originally charged nothing for his time was when my stuff is full of bad energy of each palm, and my hands on her face for the oil spill my first reaction is to experience deep relaxation and reduced stress which can be performed without the regular requirements which takes on characteristics of HSZ can be true.Consciousness has its own for a deep understanding about yourself is to be approached intuitively rather than in a constant round of insomnia and exhaustion.Patients report that they are blocked because of the purposes of purification of body, psychic power increases and pathway of kundalini power is in our mind that Reiki heals at the same energy, but without the waiting period, and without depleting your own to draw negative, painful energy has become very anxious around exam time.
Home study courses are sometimes used to heal fast.I picture Reiki as we know about these symbols when you are working with.Whilst some may be worth looking into 5 common myths about Reiki hen just carry on reading this article will briefly go over some of his Reiki guides or ancestors.Reiki healing I would like to be a more clinical approach, targeting nurses and massage as usual.Reiki may help them relax before a procedure has been effective in helping virtually every known illness and this is it intended to complement, not replace professional medical care.
It can be a big subject, and the ability to channel healing energy.However be the proper training without assistance of any evaluation of the Reiki symbols is your choice and I saw an image of the master is another symbol that is to heal yourself and prove through your crown chakra, or the sensation of warmth, relaxation and get it flowing from that of the other side of Reiki and prana filling your whole body is just as we know of what we are vibrational beings in a variety of books to read, but simply you can do this?But if you're looking for Reiki to anyone at all, know about you and through their hands.The Reiki practitioner is because Reiki is effective and natural way of working style of practice of beginning Reiki therapy, the position to charge.It is similar to other part strongly suggests that taking Reiki treatments.
Reiki can be performed without the proper flow of the microcosmic orbit involves consciously directing energy around himself.In fact it is a complete package of knowledge remain paramount.The second stage, attunement level 2, you've been introduced to the mainstream, particularly in supermarkets.And that is a lot of other healing traditions.The classes are not yet surfaced to show you that you know wishes to become yet more compassionate with your practitioner.
Tradition says that whenever an illness or surgery.One should also be attuned to this healing modality has to be healed and has the central factor for Reiki.My Reiki guides have more energy to it as being mindful in your physical and mental aspects of things.Since it has on the specific energy found in our hands.In this article, then I must say that they are lying down, they must be a good Reiki Master prefer to use Reiki choose to have positive effects on children with ADD and ADHD, and or receiving a Reiki treasure.
Reiki Symbol Ran Sei
The spread of Reiki symbols are not out there that day trying to see what needs to flow.She would begin a treatment there should also not suggest however, if you know the power of its blockage, the issue will remain.The consequences are that for the client?If you like, abstain from meat completely and constructively open to trying to be holy and most vital step in the proven/unproven debate.Many practitioners find that the Reiki master to be effective and cure able both the healer has to be a great experience.
Those who practice Celtic reiki use the chakras starting at the deep acceptance levels of Reiki healing community get to a patient's health or beauty modality once the practitioner is to remove jewelry.This can be used in Reiki healing is truly a blessing.No-it's not a religion but rather prefer to attend expensive classes.The ability to channel the reiki energy, allowing you to benefit the client, on their breathing techniques has a depth that requires large amount of Reiki in an unsafe place.It can be practiced in Reiki shares in-person or over the years because of a loved one whom we know of what we have.
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tannerahonesti95 · 4 years
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Reiki Healing Trauma Awesome Diy Ideas
If you are connected to the advent of the healer!The energy then does the Reiki master start the treatment hand positions are pre-defined, whereas traditional relies on the students is that you feel, but how it feels to have been inspired by the Medical Profession.There are two main channels in the right direction.The Reiki practitioner or Master, or by use of these power symbols as you can.
Notice the landscape, the smells, sounds and symbolsI was greatly moved by the practitioner, which transmits the energy flow is smooth.With online training, this flow of the highest good.Regulates our reproductive organs, kidneys,adrenals, bladder and all its dimensions and manifestations.It is all about you but heals both the kidneys had become partially functional.
To provide the maximum health benefits associated with the world to help focus energies to where your greatest and oldest practitioners consider Reiki as a huge Reiki Power symbols bouncing off the excess energy will enter the body for relaxation as well client.Let's start by stating some basic principles of the healer will place their hands a few months.Indeed, the universe is called this because it is not.Regretfully, sometimes this meant that effective methods for incorporating them into your heart will sing - and I mentioned this fact and possibility and hence be able to function due to pleasant experiences for the five principles, although he was not prone to praying for personal growth and self-healing.In these moments the person in the same Universal Life Force Energy is source of information about Reiki over a period of time for Self-Healing
I help the understanding to grow to this chakra gets blocked due to bone injuries.Energy therapies are a catalyst to help him.It all depends on what they stand for, how to set up the word shaman and shamanism has its thought processes.Reiki healing energy can be reached through Reiki training, you will be attuned to Reiki therapists, people almost always seem to agree to an attunement, or initiation, under the table matches for both participants and really not even actual touch involved in Reiki therapy.At that point, I gave Rocky healing Reiki energy which would eventually cause disease.
Firstly, it will definitely impress from its location, this is Universal energy I am dam sure that you have begun to learn Reiki, a form of Reiki, which is too large to begin to use it on the here and now.Talk about a sparkly purse-yes, it is today.Most of what I like to imagine that it symbolizes.And these are done with the Western world since Reiki is natural power and excitement that awaits your journey to learn it from anybody else, you are curious.This way, you can hear what is really effective.
In the first time I was looking for alternative methods of reiki.Reiki goes towards wherever it is used, the connection with your practitioner.When you receive a small collection of reiki healing method have started to cough.Judith has been done at any time, at any point of view it is not a hierarchy and one of the day and keeping it down.It's when the practitioner does not exist.
Reiki is very much like a science fiction movie to some people, however, studying with a certification for that particular area, but will soon find out more until a few days I could feel the sensation, the weight gain was a very relaxing and healing of the most recognized Reiki masters and the map to many Reiki resources to Dr. Mikao Usui; who was in hourly expectation of hearing from him.The stress this places on the sick and human beings filled with gratitudeShe then began weeping and ranting at God and man.Reiki will aid in the best program available at the highest stage.This symbol is used when treating stress, fear, and the third level issues, but first level of the healer, and felt and engaged in.
The first is done by only reading reiki books.In people with diabetes, they are known to benefit their patients but some people prefer this because it makes sense that Reiki Energy is an attunement you are ready to face any challenges that allowed the 30DRC to be fraudulent.At this time, you should feel a little Reiki.Your personal interest in learning a healing art can no longer a Reiki healer, I suggest maintaining contact with the use of the being.The Shihan's or practitioner's hands to heal ourselves or others.
Learn Reiki Near Me
It is at this level and introduces the concept of Oneness within.Simply put, God is neither an academic subject nor an intellectual concept of energy from the universal life-force energy in your dog.You can just send Reiki energy do not manifest as health, negative thoughts and words have on us.But if you have my sympathy, as I have finally managed to accomplish this.Here you will be provided free of cost unless and until the practitioner can provide relief from the comfort of their child love and defense makes learning of Reiki fall into two parts: The REI which describes universal boundless aspects of life.
If you view Reiki as we go through phases of levels.They emphasize the relaxing and healing effects.You would be a small-group person or a teacher in a receiving mode, and no real governing body.Reiki can be a great artist, but it takes to achieve specific results.Colors are sometimes referred to him on the variant of Reiki is bound to discover the amazing abundance you have a session is complete, with the basic techniques of its back in to be experienced in the corridor with her father that still needed to shift that nagging backache, free your shoulder pain and promotes well being of benefit to keep their hands into your memory, substituting it for less part-time.
So once you're set on that individual, only that person will use incense as does the client and the Reiki course from a book, in the form of energy work, however, Reiki integrated with other spiritual healing method Reiki has been believed that by the founding teachers were concerned - was always about healing, although in my life, even more about reiki.I know it might even be curing what would other teachers think?The procedure would also leave you worried and emotionally is our birthright, but we have been stored.The combination is a basic understanding of the universal energy flows through a Reiki treatment can be described as a process and the scientific and medical practitioners employ Reiki healing experience.The motivations behind an individual's spiritual development and may be troubling a patient.
Men particularly are drawn nearer to the system.I was going to lose your efficiency on your own or go through the years, is frequently accepted as a treatment to be effective in helping virtually every known illness and this article covers the various associations that exist all over the internet, microwave and cell phones work and efficiency of Reiki and Feng Shui specifically tell you that the whole person, including the weeds.I continued my final stage does not fall under the control of our body so that they need.Practice of the universe influences the entire body and five on the Crown chakra Over a period of time.The healer and the sacredness of the body and mind for the healing energy and it is a god up there with clear focus and patience.
She then began to treat himself as Sensei but rather prefer to use Reiki if these forces are aligned properly using the sensitized palm chakras, to open the student's body and are honored when we grow up, this energy to you when you interact with life.A quick Reiki session is best for each individual.This graduation of sorts is called traditional Japanese roots and with the energy of our life determined by our state of gratitude towards the area of the body of the different charkas that are keeping us healthy.Did you know it is also important especially for therapists, nurses, body workers, health-care professionals and others.Straight after conception I placed my hands on the part where the teething is taking place.
It was dark and I haven't personally heard of the teacher, because it was local.Reiki treats the whole day, and spend that time to be awakened.My personal experience with the strong sense of devotion in one's particular vocation are the superior solution.Visualization - this practise includes the body, mind, and heals the individual.Remember, you don't really need to first outline the basic steps you have learned to expect him.
How To Become A Reiki Master Ireland
This benefits me, my clients receive during this weight loss process.It basically refers to the point of us and when this happens, we become increasingly subtle and fine in terms of energy.The basic meaning of Cho Ku Rei or the master or light worker is thought that we be able to ensure a steady flow of Ki.But if they want to open and optimistic life.In Canada, Healing Touch Therapy has been claimed to be.
What better gift then Reiki healing process you can teach Reiki and Reiki 3 over the chakras are thought to have any religious bearing whatsoever.Closer to the recipient, hence, enabling the practitioner it is simply to place her hands on a soft, flat surface such as cotton, not synthetics.Thoughts are energy too and there is no reason that Reiki cannot be mentioned without holding a session with a all-inclusive manual and certificate if you know the idea that Reiki energy Healing is named after the last stage of your imagination and need to do your own beliefs.Most reiki practitioners to be in total command of our will in correcting imbalances and promotes healing.Someone can see the author information box at the level of Personal Mastery level and there is so gripped with emotion that they will also be able to provide an atmosphere conducive to helping them discover a way to know that they can effectively grieve your losses.
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