Snippet from the next chapter of Misfits under the cut!
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Someone grabbed his shoulder. “Excu-“
Crack!
Ingo yelped and stumbled back, clutching his nose. “Ow! Sorry! Sorry!”
Emmet’s knuckles stung. He was on his feet now, his chair knocked over. He didn’t remember getting up.
“Ingo?” He could still feel the resounding shock up his arm, and the sharp crack of wood echoed in his ears. He reached out and his heart dropped when Ingo flinched away. “Did. Did I hurt you?”
Shit.
“I- I’m sorry,” Emmet wrung his hands, unsure what to do. “I’m sorry! Are you okay? I didn’t mean to! You surprised me. Don’t sneak up on me like that!”
“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I won’t do it again,” Ingo promised, muffed by his hands.
“That’s not- You’re not in trouble. That wasn’t punishment. It was a reflex, I wasn’t thinking! If I knew it was you I would never-“ Emmet choked on his words. Knowingly, he would never, but he’d done it all the same, hadn’t he? No amount of excuses would change that.
He wanted. He wanted to brush Ingo’s hands away, cradle his jaw, and see the damage for himself. Fix it. Somehow. But Ingo had flinched and surely that would only make everything worse. But this had to be fixable. It just had to be.
“You can hit me back!”
Ingo stared up at him with more confusion than fear, which felt like a win in Emmet’s book. “Pardon?”
“Punch me!” Emmet enthusiastically shouted. “Then we will be even. Fair’s fair!”
He opened and closed his mouth a few times. “No, I… I’m not sure that’s…”
“It’s not a trick. You get one freebie.” Emmet held up a single finger. “As hard as you like. No retaliation. I won’t be mad.”
“Emmet…”
“I am Emmet.”
“I’m not going to hurt you.”
His smile froze. “Are you sure.”
“I am quite certain.” Ingo rubbed his nose and looked up anxiously. “It was just an accident, wasn’t it?”
Emmet did not like how uncertainly he asked that. Did he still think Emmet socked him on purpose? Guilt gnawed on his insides like termites. “Yes. Accident. You startled me.”
Ingo nodded, satisfied with that answer. “I will endeavour not to do so in the future.”
“That. Is a good idea. Yes. But.” He grimaced. It felt wrong to be shifting the onus of preventing a repeat incident on Ingo. Emmet had punched him. “Not your fault.”
“It’s not yours either.”
“I hurt you.”
Ingo waved him off. Emmet noted with great relief that he looked undamaged. “It’s nothing, no harm done.”
Liar. Emmet’s hand still stung. He hit hard. “Okay. Good. You can still hit me back. If you want.”
“I have no desire to do so.”
“Okay. Fine.” Emmet flexed his fingers and tried to act normal. They stood in awkward silence. Ingo absentmindedly brought his hand up towards his face, then caught himself and lowered it again. “Are you sure?“
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This is apropros of nothing and I’m really the last person who should be giving advice but-
Time and time again when I’ve dreaded posting a piece of writing and felt ashamed and upset and like it wasn’t good enough, I’ve found that what was really going on was my gut telling me it needed editing again. Taking a second or third or fourth pass over it will reveal some detail I knew in my heart I’d missed but hadn’t been able to put my finger on and then it’ll click and I’ll feel fine.
Not that over-editing isn’t a thing (asking yourself ‘am I making improvements or just changing stuff for change’s sake’ is always key here). But the ‘ugh I hate this I don’t ever want to look at it’ voice is just instincts telling you something is missing and only editing will let you know what.
So just. Don’t believe the negative voice! Change the wording of it! ‘This sucks’ is actually just ‘This needs edited’ and you just have to rip that bandaid off and do it.
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