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watchmegetobsessed · 3 years

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VALERIE - Part V. (Harry Styles)

happy sunday loves!! part 5 is here, buckle up bc we are getting down to business here!! thank you so much for the nice feedbacks, it’s always so moving and inspiring to read your thoughts, so please keep them coming! even if it’s just some gibberish rambling, those are the best haha! now let’s jump right into part 5, we are heading into the christmas mood and im so excited for yall to read this part!! enjoy!

word count: 6.1k

SERIES MASTERPOST

masterlist

By the time November nears its end you officially become a couple with Marcus. It happens gradually, two more dates follow your first one, and then on the third one you agree to test the waters of the possibilities between the two of you exclusively.

Marcus is a great guy. He is funny, caring and smart, always listens to you and cares for even the smallest details about you when you’re talking. He is great company and never fails to make you feel appreciated and wanted. Exactly what you’ve been looking for in a guy, Rosa really hit the nail on the head this time.

You easily fall into a habit with him. Fridays are for date nights, sometimes you go for little trips outside the city on Sundays and he never misses a chance to send you flowers throughout the week. He is just the type of guy that’s always there to cheer you up with something whenever the days start to weigh down on your shoulders.

You even have dinner together with Rosa and Steven one Saturday evening, Rosa keeps giving you those ‘I told you so’ eyes whenever Marcus kisses you shortly or places his hand to your waist. You mostly just roll your eyes at her, not wanting to make a big deal out of the two of you, but Rosa knows how long you’ve been trying to find someone.

What’s a surprising turn is that you start seeing Harry more. Intentionally. You have no idea how it happens, but it does and you’re not mad about it. Some days you grab lunch together whenever he is in the neighborhood, some days you go shopping with him when his sister doesn’t have the time. Harry is a problematic shopper, he takes a long time to decide on clothes so usually you are the one that forces him to choose and finish before all shops close.

When he has had a rough week and you happened to call him for whatever reason, the two of you agree to meet up for drinks at his place, then end up playing UNO for hours, slowly emptying out two bottles of wine.

It’s starting to get harder to imagine what it was like when things weren’t like this with him. When you were getting anxiety from just the thought of seeing him or having to talk to him. It’s like the both of you are showing a different version of yourselves to each other and you have to admit you enjoy being friends with him.

He keeps his habit of teasing you and making jokes about you though, but you don’t mind it. He is not doing it in a mean way with the attempt to piss you off, but to make you laugh and start a playful war where you both throw insults at each other until one of you runs out of it and just starts laughing. You feel a kind of dynamic building between you and him that has a way better effect on you than the continuous killing you were doing before.

You can tell Rosa is thankful for the change as well. Whenever she sees you interact with Harry without making a grimace or have that face that screams how badly you want to hit him, she is relieved that she has one less thing to worry about and Valerie will have two amazing godparents who even like each other.

Christmas is always a big parade in your family. Your mom and your aunts always want to celebrate together so in the past few years it has become a tradition to rent a place out that has enough space for the whole extended family and spend three days there from the 23rd to the 25th. This year your dad found a huge cabin in the woods with ten bedrooms and seven bathrooms, just the perfect size for you all. It’s gonna be your parents, Rosa and Steven with Valerie, Aunt Monica, Aunt Teresa with Uncle Andrew, your cousin Etta, her husband Joe and their two kids, your other cousin Lily with her husband Jeremy and their daughter, and lastly you and Harry. Though your mom urged you to invite Marcus along as well, he could join you for longer than a dinner, since he was already set to fly home to his family.

“You sure he can’t stay for at least the first night?” you mom asks on the phone one evening. You’re stirring the sauce in the pan. holding the phone to your ear with your shoulder so you have both of your hands free.

“Yes, I’m sure. It’s fine, he can come for dinner and then leave later.”

“I get it, but it would have been fun if he stayed,” she sighs, clearly disappointed that she couldn’t change what’s already set. If you’re being honest you don’t mind that Marcus is not staying for the night. You haven’t been dating for that long, you feel like it would be a little uncomfortable to have him there the whole time. A dinner is perfectly fine as a starter, since he hasn’t met anyone else from your family other than Rosa and Steven.

“Anyway,” she sighs moving on, “Have you figured it out how you’re gonna get there?”

“I don’t know, I guess I’ll tag along with someone.”

“Well, I think you should ask Harry. Everyone else is pretty packed already. Rosa and Steven won’t have any extra space with Valerie this year.”

You nod, even though she can’t see you. These past years Rosa always offered you a ride for the holidays, but even when they brought her over for just one night their car was jam-packed. No way you’re gonna fit in there so you are left with Harry since Marcus can only come in the afternoon.

“Sure, I’ll ask him.”

You shoot him a text that day and he replies right away that you’re welcomed in his car, though he won’t be able to take you back since he is leaving early in the morning on the 25th since he is flying back to the UK to his family. It’s fine, you think, you’ll just probably just tag along with aunt Monica back to the city, she always gets her a car for these occasions. Though it’s not your ideal option, she is not the best partner for rides, because she is a fan of smoking in the car, but you don’t have much of a choice.

“I’ll call you when I leave, okay?” Marcus tells you on the morning of the 23rd. It’s early, barely seven, but he is up because he needs to work a little today and you are finishing up packing since Harry will be here in an hour to pick you up.

“Sure. Drive safe,” you huff sitting on the edge of the bed, staring down at your suitcase that’s still not closed, clothes are sticking out on the side and you’re sure you’ll have to sit on it to pull the zipper.

“See you later,” Marcus says before you end the call.

It’s rather comical how you try to close the suitcase but you only care about the fact that you eventually succeed. Only minutes before eight you are packed and ready so when you get Harry’s text that he is outside you can leave right away.

Seeing you with your big suitcase he hops out of the car and rushes to help you.

“How long are you planning to stay, Y/N?” he chuckles lifting the bag up and you just shrug your shoulders with a smirk. You’ve alway been a heavy packer, no need to try to cover it up.

Harry throws your stuff into the back of the car as you take the passenger seat. His phone is hooked to the car, a playlist of his own playing gently through the speakers and you’re surprised to catch on the Christmas feeling in the songs.

“Are you in the spirit?” you ask when he gets into the car.

“Like to set the mood ahead,” he chuckles starting the car and off you go.

Ridiculous to think about it, but it’s actually the first time you sit in the same car with Harry or see him drive even. The way you two used to be was not quite ideal to have you locked up in such a small place as a car. But now you have nothing against spending the almost hour long drive with him.

“Can you pull out the navigation when I leave the highway? I’m not sure where exactly I need to head,” he asks you, eyes fixed on the road ahead of him and nodding you open the app on your phone so his can keep on playing the music without the voice of the navigation interrupting it.

“Excited to spend your first Christmas with us?” you ask. Though Harry was there at several family events, it’s his first Christmas since becoming Valerie’s godfather.

“I am,” he chuckles, nodding, hands gripping the wheel gently. He is a natural driver, easily working the car, the kind you feel completely safe next to. As Baby It’s Cold Outside comes on a smile stretches across your lips as you start gently bop your head to the song. “I’ve heard crazy stuff about Christmases at your family,” he adds glancing in your way for a second.

“Like what?”

“I remember when Steven told me about his first Christmas with your family. You remember that?”

Searching in your memories you tried to remember when was the first time Rosa brought Steven along. They dated for two years before they got married so it’s been about five years since then, but as you think hard the memory of that specific year pops into your head making you laugh as you nod.

“Oh, yes. The year Aunt Monica almost burned the Airbnb down,” you sigh grinning at the memory. She brought some special kind of cigars that year that were told to be curiosities from somewhere fancy, but they ended up the literal worst quality, flaming bits were falling out them all the time when she would smoke one, almost making the rug catch on fire wherever she went. Best thing is that she was already drunk on the liquor so she didn’t even notice, there was always a person on Aunt Monica duty, following her around, making sure nothing burnt down.

“Steven said he had a moment when he thought about bailing,” Harry tells you and you gasp, because that’s new information.

“Really?”

“Yeah, but like only for a split second after your dad walked in on him naked in the bathroom. That was kind of the last straw. Luckily Rosa could convince him to stay. Guess it all worked out at the end.” Harry smiles as he stares ahead of him.

You can’t imagine a version where Rosa and Steven don’t end up together. They met through a mutual friend not long after Rosa had a nasty breakup with her scumbag ex. Steven was there to put her back together and be her partner as she found herself again. The change and positive impact he had on her could be seen every day and you were so thankful to him for helping your sister find her way out of such a dark place in her life. It didn’t take them too long to start dating and he proposed a little more than a year later. You still remember how Rosa was screaming in the phone when she called you that evening telling you that Steven proposed. They are quite literally a match made in heaven. It’s been your goal in life to find this person in your life though you haven’t had much luck with men so far. Ironically, if you were in a room with every man you were ever involved with in any kind of way, Harry would be the only one you’d want to talk with. If you had to make this exact same choice just months ago you would have chosen to run out screaming.

“Maybe this year it’s your turn to get horrified from us,” you laugh, sinking down a little in your seat as you adjust the seat belt. You’re still quite far away from the cabin, you might as well make yourself comfortable.

“I think there’s not much that I haven’t witnessed yet. I was walked in on at the bathroom once too, but it was your cousin, Etta.”

“When did that happen?” you ask with a heartfelt laugh.

“I think it was last summer at one of your nieces’ birthday party. Luckily everything was already tucked away when she basically barged in.”

“She didn’t miss much,” you tease him with a smirk and your witty comment catches him by surprise.

“Are you saying my dick is not imposing enough to be worthy of peeking?” he asks with raised eyebrows and you’re happy he is driving. His intimidating look would already burn right into your skin by now, but he is forced to watch the road instead.

“I mean, if you want to put it that way…” you continue, but a laugh escapes your lips.

“Take that back, Y/N,” he orders, sneaking a hard look at you before turning back ahead, but you can see the small smile hiding on his lips.

“Or what?”

“Or you might find yourself in a war you don’t want to be involved in,” he warns you, but his words don’t quite have the effect on you he wanted. Because in a heartbeat you find yourself feeling… excited? Thrilled? Even curious about his means behind his words.

“Wouldn’t want to lie, so…” Pretending like you’re sorry you shrug your shoulders as Harry gives you a look that makes your stomach churn. Now either you are gonna have some fun teasing each other or… you just threw yourself into the arms of the Devil himself. Either way, you’re certain Harry won’t leave it in that.

Turning your head to your window you can’t keep your smile contained as you think of the fact that how big of a lie it was. Harry is surely not a guy who should ever worry about any aspect of his manhood. You’re talking from experience.

***

The cabin is absolutely gorgeous, just the perfect place for a cozy family holiday. Hidden from the busy roads with a secure gate and tall trees on both sides, the back of it is facing a majestic view of the valley and the evergreen covered hill in the distance. With an interior straight from the pages of a magazine, you need just a few moments to adjust to your surroundings upon arriving.

“I saved a nice room for you, Harry!” your mother gushes the moment she sees the two of you walk through the front door. You huff in annoyance.

“And what about me?”

Harry chuckles giving you a smug grin. “Guess you’re just second after me.”

“It’s his first Christmas with us, he deserves the better room,” your mom shushes at you, making your eyes roll instantly. It’s still hard to believe Harry has this kind of charm over most people.

After greeting everyone who is already there, your dad, Aunt Teresa and Etta with her family, your mom walks the two of you down one of the hallways that leads to several bedrooms. She stops at the last door with an excited grin on her face as she opens it revealing the bedroom behind it.

You instantly understand why she thought this is the best one. The view is absolutely breathtaking, the gentle noon light is flowing into the room through the floor to ceiling windows, the king sized bed facing them so when you wake up in the morning the first thing you see is the endless sea of evergreens on the side of the hill. Not to mention the room has its own bathroom, not many of the other rooms are blessed with that. There’s a spacious shower that has enough space for at least three people in there and it’s one of those fancy ones that can make you feel like you’re having a shower in the middle of a jungle, mood lights and bluetooth speakers attached to it.

“No fucking way Harry is getting this room!” you gasp as you look around, taking in the luxure your mother is willing to hand over to him.

“Jealous, much?” he smirks, throwing his sports bag to the bed already ruining the neatly made sheets. He does not deserve this.

“Mom!” you huff turning to her, but she has made her mind up already.

“Your room is nice too, don’t worry Honey. Let Harry have this one!”

“I really can’t believe you are taking his side,” you grumble under your breath, folding your arms on your chest as you take one last look at the stunning view.

“Come on, Y/N. He is a guest!”

“He is not! You said it yourself he is family now!” you retort and Harry just laughs behind you, so you shoot him a murderous look over your shoulder, that just fuels his entertainment.

“Don’t be silly. Your room is the second one on the right from here,” she smiles at you. “We are gonna take a walk around once everyone arrives, so get settled by then!” she informs you before walking out.

“Hey,” Harry’s soft voice makes you turn around. “You can have the room if you want.”

Your eyebrows rise at the kind gesture, it’s very not like him, even now in your friendly state, so it’s quite odd that he is willing to switch rooms with you.

“No need,” you shake your head grabbing the handle of your suitcase that you abandoned at the door.

“You sure? It doesn’t matter where I’m sleeping, really.”

“I’m not gonna deal with my mother’s scolding if she finds out I took your room, so you can totally stay.”

Harry chuckles as you head out, but stop at the door to have one last word with him. “Though I might occupy your bathroom, that shower looks nice.”

“All yours,” he grins before you walk out.

***

By 11 am everyone arrives and the once quiet cabin is now buzzing from life, children running around, Valerie’s babbling shoots through the spacious living area where Rosa set her crib up, your mother is already making preparations for dinner while most of the men are circled around the pool table having a beer since no one has to drive for the rest of the day.

“When is Marcus arriving?” Rosa asks, eyes on Valerie who is absolutely destroying something that once were an elephant maybe, but she’s been ruthless with the poor animal, chewing and throwing it around all the time, so it’s not just a grey, fuzzy mess.

“Sometime before dinner. He has some work to finish,” you tell her pulling your legs under yourself on the comfy couch.

“And explain again, why isn’t he staying for the night?” she turns to you with a puzzled look.

“Because he is going home to his family early in the morning tomorrow.”

“Okay, but he could have just left from here, didn’t he?”

“It’s… complicated. It’s better if he just goes back home tonight and then leaves from there in the morning.”

What you leave out of the whole explanation is that you didn’t really invite him to stay the night as well. Sounds horrible and ridiculous but you didn’t think you’d have felt comfortable with him staying. You’ve been dating for only barely more than a month and though things are going well, you felt like starting with just a dinner would be a better idea. Marcus didn’t question why you didn’t offer him to stay, it seemed like he was fine with just coming and then going after dinner.

Does this make you a bad girlfriend? Maybe, but you value your comfort and feelings more than to ruin your favorite holiday with your family.

Just as you mom said, once everyone is settled in their rooms for the upcoming three days, the whole gang dresses up to have a walk around taking the welcoming little path that runs around the cabin and is smooth enough for Valerie’s carriage as well. Your nieces and nephew are quick to surround Harry and nag him to join them at the front, exploring the woods surrounding the path. It seems like he doesn’t mind it and gladly takes part in the adventure, also secretly looking after them so their parents can have a break and enjoy the stroll in hopes the walk tires the kids out enough that they’ll willingly go to bed in the evening instead of whining to stay up late.

You’re walking with Etta next to you as she tells you about Hannah’s latest dance competition when you spot that Harry and Oliver, your nephew, Etta’s other kid are suspiciously whispering around pointing in your direction. At last Olly nods and runs up to you showing a quite thick piece of wood into your hand. You look down at him confused.

“Thank you?” you tell him a little unsure what it’s all about.

“I found it in a bush, I want to take it home. Harry said you’ll keep it for me because you have a good hand for thick and hard sticks.”

You almost choke on your own breath, as Olly just carelessly runs back ahead to join his sister. You immediately look over to Etta in fear that she heard what Harry told Oliver, but luckily she was talking with Joe turning back, not really paying attention to the conversation you just had with her son. If she did, Harry probably wouldn’t live by now.

Speaking of the devil, you look in his way and that annoying, smug grin is right there as he nods in your way saluting before he shows his hands into his pockets and turns back around to catch up with the kids.

That disgusting piece of shit really went into the depth of teaching something secretly dirty to your nephew as a way of payback for your comment in the car earlier. He surely wasn't just joking when he said you’d pay for what you said. And you have a feeling he is just getting started.

***

Aunt Monica is like a legend in your family. She is the oldest between your mom and her sisters, already in her sixties, but in the heart she still feels like she has just turned twenty. She never married, but had several men in her life, love affairs, short flings, but none of them lasted for more than a year.

“Why would I settle when there’s so many fish in the sea?” she once told you, her iconic Chanel sunglasses sat on her nose as she sipped on her martini.

She has worked many jobs throughout her life, she was once a dancer, she waited tables and even worked as a TV host at one point in the ‘80s. She was the true free spirit of the family, her sisters often questioned her sanity, but you think there’s nothing wrong with how she lived her life, enjoying it to the last bit. In the early ‘90s she was seeing a millionaire, probably the only man she would have given her lifestyle up for. Unfortunately, they never married, the man passed away due to his heart problems, however, since he had little to zero family he left basically everything to Aunt Monica. Money, house, cars, business, everything. Being the smart woman that she is, she handed over the business into professional hands but she is still the owner, so the money is still flowing even though she could have lived happily on the money she inherited without ever having to work a day.

She seems a little odd in your family, but she has always been a loving aunt to you, a caring sister and she never fails to take care of her loved ones. She is the one to pay for all these Christmas getaways, otherwise you wouldn’t be able to stay in places this nice.

“What’s all the money for if I don’t spend it on my family?” she always says when someone questions if she is fine with paying for everything. Your mom and Teresa have tried to convince her to let them at least pay for part of it but she wouldn’t even listen to them.

She likes to have her own, sometimes odd ways in life. She definitely has a drinking problem, but not in a dangerous way. You have never seen her completely wasted, she just likes to keep things buzzing and always have a drink on her whenever she needs the extra fun. Because of her past she has the greatest stories about meeting famous people back in the days or how soldiers used to try to win her over when she was just a teenager.

“Oh, those things happened,” your mom told you when one day you questioned if you could believe all the crazy stories Aunt Monica tells you. “She was like… the star of the show. Used to hate living in her shadow, but I can’t blame her for enjoying life and doing the things I was too afraid to do myself.”

Now you’re sitting in the sunroom that faces the amazing view behind the cabin, the Christmas tree is standing tall in the corner, beautifully decorated in white and beige. Valerie is snuggled up to your chest as you gently rub her back and you listen to Aunt Monica tell you about how a literal captain once proposed to her after just three days of knowing each other.

“He was a gentleman, but a beast in the bed, Y/N. I’m telling you, men in uniform are just a different level of satisfaction.”

She sighs deep, taking a sip from her margarita that’s definitely not her first drink, and you just laugh nodding.

“He was begging for me to go to Italy with him.”

“And why didn’t you?”

“Who said I didn’t?” she asks with a pretentious hurt look turning to you and you just laugh. You should have known the story would go this way. “I accepted the offer, only turned down his proposal when we sailed off and then we parted as soon as I stepped onto the land of Italy. Broke his heart into pieces, but I was too busy enjoying the Italian summer.”

Harry comes in and hands you a bottle filled with juice that probably Rosa sent for Valerie.

“Thank you,” you smile at him shortly as you adjust the little girl in your arms and hand her the bottle.

“Young boy, have you ever proposed to someone?” Aunt Monica asks Harry who stops in his way as he was already about to head out, but now he walks back to the sofa where she is sitting.

“No, not yet,” he shakes his head.

“And how do you think you would if the time came?”

You watch Harry think to himself at the odd and quite random question. It’s not really something you would have ever asked him, but now that there’s the chance to hear his answer you are listening curiously.

“Depends on the woman I’m proposing to,” he replies after a few seconds.

“How would you propose to Y/N?”

Your eyes widen as you turn to your aunt with shock all over your face. You definitely didn’t want yourself dragged into this.

“Aunt Monica, that’s--”

“Shush! I’m just asking theoretically. Wanna hear his answer.”

Harry’s eyes wander over to your sitting figure on the sofa as he leans onto the back of the one in front of him. You can feel the heat crawling up on your neck to your cheeks under his burning look and you just know he enjoys how nervous you got from this simple question that wasn’t even asked from you.

Licking his lips he moves his eyes from you over to Aunt Monica who is still waiting for his answer.

“Something romantic, but not too grandiose, I know she doesn’t like being in the center of the attention that much. Maybe…” Tapping on his chin you listen to his words and without even realizing you hold your breath. “Maybe on a hike with a nice view. She would be admiring the view when I get down on one knee and as she turns around I pop the lid on the box.”

What bugs you is that it’s an awfully accurate description of how you’d imagined your proposal. He was right about many aspects, like how you don’t like being in the center of attention. No idea how he nailed so easily, but he did.

Glancing down you pretend to be busy with Valerie who is still peacefully drinking her juice, eyes wandering around the room relentlessly.

“So you really look to satisfy her deepest fantasies, careful about even the smallest details. Women appreciate it,” Aunt Monica nods, completely oblivious to how uncomfortable she just made you feel.

“Thank you, I do like to satisfy women,” Harry cheekily answers with a smirk, eyes locking with yours for a moment as Aunt Monica lets out a laugh at the dirty comment. Before you could bite your tongue a retort slips out of your mouth.

“What a shame you don’t always succeed.”

Harry’s eyes turn from playful to dark pretty quickly and you enjoy the victory over him. Your comment in the car earlier already wounded his manhood, now it’s another stab right into his… crotch. It’s the least he deserves after what he taught poor Olly.

“That I don’t believe. He seems like an absolute pleaser.” Aunt Monica winks in Harry’s way who just smiles at her shyly, but you can tell your comment is still bugging him.

“I think Y/N knows that too herself, am I right?” He tilts his head to the side and you stand your ground with holding his gaze and not looking away.

“Don’t be so sure about that,” you simply say, just when you hear your mom calling out for you. “Would you take her please?” you innocently ask walking up to Harry, holding Valerie out for him. You can tell he is looking for a witty comeback, but he has nothing just yet, so he is stuck with keeping his mouth shut as he takes baby Valerie from you. You gift him with a sweet, but definitely spikey smile before leaving him there with Aunt Monica.

***

Dinner is already almost ready, you’re helping your mom and Aunt Teresa in the kitchen with the finishing touches, Joe and Harry packing out the wine bottles from the rack Jeremy brought them in, the two of them examining the bottles with such professionalism you almost believe they have the slightest idea about what to look for in a good wine.

“Should we open some red or white ones for tonight’s dinner?” Joe asks your mom who is the master chef when it comes to the dinner.

“Red would suit better,” she answers. “Are they sweet?”

“Some, yeah,” Harry nods holding up a bottle and checking the label.

“Great. Monica loves that too,” Teresa chuckles as she adds some salt to the mashed potato.

“And Y/N too,” Harry adds, not even looking up, but he successfully attracts your mom’s attention with his comment.

“She does?” Harry looks up and sees your boiling anger plastered all over your face, so of course he chooses to take it further.

“Oh, yeah. She can drink like a gallon. Wine drunk Y/N is like a whole different person.”

“I told you so many times not to get drunk, Y/N. It’s not too ladylike. When was the last time you saw her drunk?”

“There were plenty of occasions,” Harry exaggerates and you could kill him right there. “Though last time it was the tequila that got her wildin’.”

That damned smirk of his is making your hands curl into fists and for a moment you tell yourself it’s okay to punch him in front of your mother even if she’ll probably disown you for such behavior.

“Y/N! I have told you a million times that you need to know where your limits lie!” she huffs shaking her head at you while you clench your jaw. Back at it with the lessons about getting drunk. She’ll never get over it, not even when you’ll be forty. Why does it matter to her so much? Sometimes she is the one to get you started, but then she gives you the dirtiest looks when you have one too many. She should just get used to it now.

“She surely likes to have fun when she has had a few drinks,” Harry continues smugly. “Remember how much fun you had at Rosa and Steven’s wedding?”

“Oh, God! I remember how drunk you were that evening, I could have killed you!” your mother growls and you roll your eyes at her.

“It wasn’t that bad. There were a lot more people who got way more wasted than me,” you try to defend yourself folding your arms on your chest.

“That doesn’t change that you were too,” she says with a hard look. Great, now she is mad at you for something that happened literally years ago. Kudos to Harry for ruining her mood.

“She wasn’t that bad,” Harry adds and you look in his way with suspicion. “She was a delight when it was time to get her to bed.”

Your mouth almost hangs open, but it seems like you’re the only one understanding what he really meant by that. Luckily, beside you and him, Rosa and Steven are the only people who knows what happened between you and Harry that night, so it’s no surprise no one else catches on the hint.

“You were the one who took her up to her room? Sorry if she was a burden,” your mother sighs and right at that moment you wish the floor would just open up and you could disappear forever. Harry’s satisfied grin is the evidence that he just won another round of this nasty war.

Just as you open your mouth to try and move the conversation to another field you see a pair of headlights pull up to the driveway. Everyone turns to the window as Marcus’ car parks down last in the line. As you step away from the counter you see the confusion in Harry’s eyes about the new guest.

“Oh, amazing! He is here!” your mom cheers, seemingly instantly forgetting about how she was dragging you just a minute ago.

“Who’s here?” you hear Harry ask, but you’re already out of there, heading to the front door to greet Marcus.

Just as you walk out into the cold evening air you see him get out with a warm smile on his lips. You wait for him at the door, arms wrapped around yourself and as he reaches you he places a soft kiss to your lips.

“Hey, how was the drive?” you ask him.

“It was fine. I didn’t arrive too late, right?”

“No, we were just about to set the table. Come on in, I’ll introduce you to everyone.”

He takes your hand in his as the two of you walk inside, all eyes immediately turning your way at the arrival of your boyfriend.

“Everyone, I want you all to meet my boyfriend, Marcus. He is staying for dinner.”

Your family members walk up to the two of you, shaking hands and introducing themselves to Marcus who smiles at everyone politely, trying his best to remember all the names and information that’s thrown at him all of a sudden. Everyone seems delighted to have him for dinner, the kids instantly make him promise he’ll play a card game with them after dinner and he happily says yes to the invitation.

You can tell your mom is proud that finally both of her daughters are spending Christmas with a man by their side and you’re almost certain your dad took a liking to Marcus the moment he mentioned he is into fishing.

Everyone seems excited and happy for Marcus, there’s just one face that doesn’t fit in the line of joyful smiles. Harry stands quite far from the two of you and only gets closer when he shakes hands with Marcus. His cocky grin is long gone from his face as he keeps his hard look on your boyfriend who is chatting with everyone. Standing next to Marcus, your hand still holding his, your eyes lock with Harry’s and there’s an unknown, burning feeling in your gut when his hard gaze holds yours. The sudden change and cold act gets you wondering what’s really going on in his mind. He is the first one to look away and you watch him walk into the kitchen and disappear from your sight before you force a smile on your lips and turn back to Marcus.

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#harry #styles #harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles oneshot #harry styles one shot #harry styles series #harry styles imagine #harry styles x you #harry styles x y/n #harry styles x reader #harry styles valerie #harry styles valerie series #valerie series

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neverheardnothing · 4 years

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rewatching joe iconis and family lincoln center performance at 4 am instead of packing or sleeping just to feel something and i have so FEW and so MANY thoughts and yall are gonna hear em all. no i will not put this under a cut. im going to be an absolute bastard about this.

i love the story joe tells about why he's singing mitb as the first song so much. like. the spite of it all. the defiance of it all. the pride of it all. the dig it or fuck off and disappear of it all. the joe iconis of it all.

“i know exactly the song im going to sing as my first song at the american songbook series.” i love that he highlights the fact that this is the american songbook series.

then immediately jumping right into broadway here i come with molly hager, the other song he is most known for!!!

every time i think about this performance i think about how this was the first (?) time this song was performed by them since the closing of bmc.

and then lance rubin comes up to sing try again. which is the only time that i know of that anyone but joe has sung this song.

i remember a remark made during watching it live that having someone else sing the song made it seem so clearly more about joe and his career. but also having lance sing it immediately makes me think of bbh closing early which yeah is part of joe’s career but also lance’s.

and also the line “if you’re an actor and another actor gets the part you auditioned for” reminds me of how lance found the auditioning process of acting and the whole [not acting part] of an acting career to be terrible which is why he quit to then become an author and the juxtaposition of him singing try again is Something. but also he DID try again he is just applying his efforts to a different creative field and it’s working out great for him. good for lance rubin.

lol i haven’t even talked about the actual performance aspect of this song anyways it’s very different from the two versions ive seen of joe doing it. he plays it a lot more comical. i love it.

sidenote not specific about this performance, but i love love LOVE the line and the music at “use the stairs, walk to the street. see the people, feel the heat, and apply yourself again.”

and also the line “when they cast you out to sea, there’s a lifeboat manned by me called try and try again” will never not make me think of bsol/last on land and bonus lance was also in that show! it just keeps circling around.

everything about these past 3 songs performed at this venue in this set list order in this moment at joe’s career is honestly so wonderful. like you had a songs about an anxiety attack, a suicide/loss of self in success, and repeated failures before this song all sung by individuals. two of these songs were written at points where joe felt frustrated/sad with his career. one written in the aftermath of specific frustration about the first closing of be more chill. one an actual song from bmc. like what a SETLIST for your first three songs! fucking michael in the bathroom, broadway here i come, and try again. truly something.

THE WHISKEY SONG!! i love hearing joe sing so much. while i think we can all agree he’s not the most skilled singer there’s something special about hearing a composer perform their own work. he adds like 3 levels of charm to make up for lack of singing skills lol. just a very charismatic guy.

lance rubin back on tamborine for the next bit of the song and he’s like laughing through it. not completely sure what he’s laughing about honestly but this Is a comedic song (after 3 real downers of songs) and also joe was playing it up.

jared weiss down on the floor with his guitar playing along. that’s its own bullet point.

audience cheering as more family members start coming on stage! i love that the band is getting cheers. love that!!!

the camera isn’t on him but from the audio, nick blaemire is presumably running around giving high fives to people in the audience.

i can’t exactly tell with the camera angle and the lighting but i think that more family members get up from different seats in the audience or at least enter in the back and walk through the audience to get to the stage during this instrumental break. reminds me of how joe loves theater that physically touches you. giving you high fives in this case.

love liz lark brown. she plays it pretty like. frenetic and frazzled. love it.

amara, badia, danielle, will, and nick are just chillin sitting on the steps of the stage. 100% contributes to the vibe of this song. top fuckin notch.

SOMEONE screams AH during the drunk part of the song and i cannot figure out who but it gives me so much life.

jared pulling lance down to the floor with him.

jason going “man.... this place is a dump” like i LOVE the irreverence.

everyone actually getting back up and also converging On the stage during the (kind of) acapella break.

and now your whole gang is up on the stage at the fancy ass appel room singing your what sounds like a mostly upbeat fun song but is actually about self medication with alcohol and it’s a fucking jam. i love the 3 solo songs and then bringing in everyone for a big group number.

sidenote not about this specific performance: the lyrics “i’ll pour some more and then—AND THEN?—i’ll pass out and then—AND THEN!” the and thens were not on the things to ruin album and i wonder why not ALL the time. was it just deemed extraneous? or was this an innovation after the album was recorded?

i love that you can see the band singing along.

yesterdays / i can’t relate. i love this song i fucking love it. i love the synthy keyboard that was an active choice made. which means that joe is not the one accompanying jared in this song.

jared: i hate today. joe: *snorts in the background*

“i like music you can hold” -> old records black suits, susannah’s obsession with music which was of course in vinyl format back then

will once said hearing lgw was very exciting because he’s first and foremost a fan of joe’s so he was hearing a new joe song for the first time and the world got just a bit larger and i think about that quote a lot in relation to this song because i was like Oh i Get What He Means now because this is the first new joe song i heard since like getting into his work and i felt that world getting a bit bigger.

jared’s monotone chorus on top of the girls underneath is so good. it’s so fucking good i cannot.

liz lark brown velociraptor fuckin classic. specifically in this performance the weird ass electric guitar noise at “there’s a dinosaur” is SO good. i love it.

i know people say Trans Vibes from next song (jeff) but this song also gives me trans vibes. i think joe inadvertently writes stuff trans people relate to because of his propensity to write for People Who Are Different.

people cheering as will takes off his jacket hell yeah.

i am way more used to the jeremy morse version of this song and really consider it more his so it’s so fun to hear will sing it.

i love the canon of the “oh”s so much.

after will sings “i go to the window looking out and what do i see? myself just staring back at me.” and someone in the audience AUDIBLY goes “oh.” like what a MOMENT. way more subtle than when someone screamed “WHAT” at the “naked korean girl” reveal during the pipe night performance but on the same tier of Great Audience Reactions.

smooth fuckin gliss bro i love it. arms out by side. i love it.

Classic Jason Sweettooth Williams Singing Helen. but this time they added like some REAL like. oh god i have no idea how to describe it. electric crunchy electric guitar noises. and it’s so good.

i havent mentioned this yet but in the background of every song people who are not in it or are backup vocals are just sitting and jamming along and it’s so nice because me fuckin too.

honest to god just have to give a timestamp for this but bullet point for whatever the fuck eric is doing in the background here.

will and katrina circling each other singing directly into each other’s faces. so good.

the Unexpected dynamic change and following crescendo i am Living.

katrina rose dideriksen riffing up top. yes. YES.

joe starting to play helen sharp and then forgetting part of his introduction to the song is so good.

the inevitable laughter at any performance of this song at “it is not lost on me you’re all here at my show”

i know nothing about the movie death becomes her so i honestly always just think about joe when this song gets performed. also thinking about how in the youtube premiere of this song, joe was talking about how lauren was shouting out the names of all the musical theater composers joe is jealous of.

right place/wrong time. i read a bsol review a while ago about how katrina rose dideriksen was underutilized and gotta say i Agree holy Shit let her sing More.

i also remember how joe once said this song felt the most personal to him and that he cried when writing it

police siren piano.

the first time in this entire song they sing in sync is at the line “i wonder if his/her life is just like mine” and i just start screaming.

when eric and katrina turn to each other for the first time and start singing At each other!!!!!!!!!!!

honey! thinking about jen ash tep talking about how Each performance of this song gets Wilder and Wilder.

love it when nick just gets off the stage and starts singing to people in the audience. apparently one of the people was will’s mom lol.

ACAPELLA BREAK!!!!!! joe just fully gets up from piano and starts WILDLY clapping along!!!!

woman of a certain age! i remember when the live show happened the album had not come out yet and then when the yt premiere of it happened it Had been out for a week or so.

piano note elevator bell

the electric guitar is doing some fucking weird ass things in this song and i am living so fucking much for it.

the riffs badia does are so fucking incredible i immediately paused this video to go and watch her sing big fat ruby again just because i wanted more badia content.

the story behind old flame is so good and joe waiting until the last fuckin moment to give her the song is so fuckin funny.

i love love love these types of joe songs that are like 7 minute long story epics like right place/wrong time and the actress and ammonia and old flame.

“the best way to get past the past is to shoot it in the head” and then the audience cheers and i fucking love it. my commentary is getting shorter. it’s 6 am and i’m tired can you tell. i also just had a lot of thoughts about this early on and less thoughts about later on.

revolution song. the deep ass fucking electric bass is So good i Will go apeshit. like honestly that might be my favorite smaller detail of this song. like i imagine if i were in the room it might be loud and deep enough that i could feel it In my chest. like you can Feel the revolution coming.

i love the faster tempo revolution song has in the cabaret version.

i also love the cabaret specific lines of “evolution in the institution”

joey is a punk rocker was honestly not ever on the list of songs i thought would get performed here but im so glad that they did. like the obvious choice would have been veins for annie golden but they went this route. obsessed with this choice. obsessed with the fact that amphibian replaced this song as the act 2 opener. obsessed that annie is the one singing this.

i am never not screaming about wave and yall know this. just throwback to me losing it in the tags in a reblog of picture of the wave passage going on about how it really does mirror joe’s career and bmc specifically. and again this song being performed for the first (?) time since bmc closed makes the “so today on a hill in las vegas” and onward part SO fucking sad i literally just started crying. the entire song being in past tense up until that part. i will just go die now.

will in the yt premiere talking about texting the line “our energy would simply prevail” in the leadup to bmc coming back.

find the bastard. for some reason when this happened live i thought it was gonna be outlaw that was performed.

i swear to god it is literally physically impossible for me not to AT LEAST mouth along to “what’s your name, what’s your name” during this song

NAMES ARE FOR ACCOUNTANTS.

MY NAME IS AWFUL LONG AS IT’S THE LYRICS OF THIS SONG.

the goodbye song. it’s never not sad. i love love love that this song is the final song every concert. i also love the recent lore of finding out that penny dreadfuls was the encore song at concerts before they became too long and it had to get cut.

finally gonna mention the background car lights. what a beautiful backdrop.

also since im always on my wrol bullshit i love how fucking clearly you can hear him at the end

accelerando accelerando accelerando. insert [joe iconis peaked when he wrote the accelerando in the goodbye song post of mine].

katrina singing an octave up is always SO fucking impressive i am so impressed by her voice she is so fucking good i love her so much

the bows are so fucking sweet i love them.

goodnight it’s 7 am.

#teresa talks #also as my life gets Increasingly busier i decide to come back #social media truly a cesspit i can never escape #many no thots head empty full yes no <3 #im very tired #iaf #joe iconis

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jhindraven · 4 years

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okay now that issue 6 is out and ive read the thing like 3 times, im gonna do my full review/breakdown of the zed comic and allll my thoughts on it.

no screenshots bc i dont want this to be longer than it is already, and also im not gonna talk about the art itself either. this is simply about the characters, the story, and how that relates to the lore of league itself.

all of this is my opinion, you can agree or disagree with me whatever, yadda yadda lets begin

ISSUE ONE

Probably the best one? In my opinion. The lack of expectations really helped this one not suck. Also the most consistent when it comes to characters personalities, comparing them to the in-game voice lines from league and the card game.

There are scenes in issue 1 that almost foreshadow, or at least reference, the events of Issue 6, specifically Zed looking up to the statue of Kusho, and how Zed kills Althon vs how Zed kills Kusho later on.

The dialogue between Shen and Akali is.. a little clunky? Shen’s dialogue is just a little. formal. but to the point that he sounds like he’s lecturing a stranger, not talking to a former student.

Jhin giving Zed his scalpel from 19 years ago is a neat detail that I wish they used more in the story. Sure, we can assume now that Jhin probably only got it because Kusho gave it to him at some point after releasing him- which means that the scalpel is one of the many wasted plot opportunities I’ll bring up here. Part of the appeal of that scene, if only just for me, was the idea that Jhin stole it from Zed while he wasn’t looking. I remember people pointing out background characters and being like “but what if that’s Jhin there! what if he was there all along!!” But that has now been thrown out the window.

A thing I wish they did was shown more of Jhin’s ‘performances’, even if only in a montage. To show more of the impact this had on Zed and Shen, the strain it put on them mentally and emotionally, and how it affected their relationship. But I understand time and probably page restraints. So whatever about that.

Again, I think this was the best one. Set up the story well, showed why everything happening is important for the character. Neat, cool. Let’s move on

ISSUE 2

Seeing the bodies was pretty fucked up, but tbh? That shit vibed. It’s one of those things I hoped they were gonna do and they did. The bodies looking like porcelain with gold blood?? And the peacock feathers???? Thats fuckin cool as hell. Then they never did it again.

In the flashback comes one of the worst fucking things in this comic. Yevnai.

Listen I adore Yevnai as a character, one of my favourites to come from the comic. You know, in the ONE ISSUE SHE ACTUALLY SHOWS UP IN????? She shows up as simply conflict between Shen and Zed (which never actually comes up mind you), as bait for Jhin, and for? Zed to show that he can sense magic from her kids to show that she’s been cheating on her husband with Quno the vastayan servant (bc we know Zed hates vastaya i guess?). oh and Guess What? the sensing magic thing also doesn’t show up again.

Oh and Jhin follows Zed to Yevnai’s place. But nothing happens from that.

Issue 2 was good, but just a total waste imo. A lot of plot points set up only to never happen again. Best things about it were dead bodies, Jhin’s tiny Zed and Shen puppets, and the knowledge that Shen still writes letters to Yevnai :’(

ISSUE 3

I got so fucking pissed when this issue came out, no shit. They took the events of The Man With The Steel Cane and just. Threw it out the window. I did a whole other post about my issues with it so I won’t just rewrite the same shit twice. But I had to actually stop reading and pace angrily for a bit. I HATE issue 3 bro.

The scene with Kusho :) . Good to know that was now a waste of misdirection because EVERYONE seemed to call that Kusho was still alive. What bullshit. But I’ll get to that.

The inconsistencies in character really show in this one. And that connects to it being a shitty rewrite of The Man With The Steel Cane. They probably wanted a fight between Shen and Zed by this point, being halfway through the comic, and just shoved it in there. Doesn’t mean I’m not mad about it.

Akali and Kayn’s dialogue was probably the best thing in the entire issue. I don’t vibe with Akali/Kayn as a ship personally, but it got a giggle out of me im ngl.

Akali attacking Zed. I guess yeah sure she would. Fits her whole “fuck you i wont do what you tell me shen” vibe. But SHEN? calling off the armistice between the yánléi and kinkou due to the actions of one of HIS ex-students?? Shen would never. Let’s add another point to the ‘This Is Really Out Of Character’ board!

The sworn and witnessed scene was nice, it’s what Kayn deserves. Finally knowing the Kashuri Faction was nice, too bad they never get fucking mentioned ever again I guess.

There’s so many references to The Man With The Steel Cane that they could’ve implimented so much better, especially dialogue. I can’t read the original story without feeling cheated out of what it was before Issue 3. So more wasted potential I guess.

Issue 4

This was a big step up from Issues 2-3. My personal favourite, but not the best (if that makes sense). But there isn’t too much to talk about here? Jhin sets off his bombs from the last issue, it looks cool, but there’s no real story to talk about here. There is a lot of character stuff to talk about though.

Zed choosing to save Shen over getting Jhin is fucking HUGE for Zed as a character. For a character so hellbent on vengence throughout the entire thing choosing instead to save his "hated enemy and closest friend” ?? im sobbing.

This whole comic was emotional as hell, and the most character development we ever fucking saw in this thing. From Zed’s daddy issues to the realisation that Zed’s shadows are shades of Jhin and Kusho (which is now fucking hilarious and makes no sense after Issue 6).

There was a lot of setup for plotpoints that actually did show up later for once, like Kayn being the temporary leader and all that jazz. What it had in emotion, it seemed to lack in real story progression until the end.

Issue 5

This issue was weird for me. Like there was a lot of plot and a lot of character shit that seemed so condensed that it felt like nothing. Zed’s confession in the cell-wagon and the information that Shen was out fighting Noxians too? Alright, sure okay.

Shen still seems wildly out of character for me, since we mostly know him as this beacon of peace and calm- he’s so violent towards Zed all the time it’s strange. Like he points a sword at Zed while saying that he isn’t allowed to kill Jhin, wtf

The callback to Awaken is fucking superb. Really solidifies that video into the lore of the game. Camille being mentioned had me like :hearteyes: This is a nitpick- but I wish we knew what happened at the end of Awaken. Is Camille okay? Did Jhin get injured? It was a week ago, if he did get injured- where and how did he recover so fast? Little details that I wanna know, not really for any real story purposes.

Rhaast finally showing up :hearteyes:, nothing else to add bc nothing else happened with him.

Jhin making the most of Piltoven technology is really cool, and its a scene that made me go “OH YEAH he was a stagehand for a good period of time!!” That’s what we call Tying In Pre-Existing Lore fellas.

Jhin just really shined in this issue. Really set him up to be The Big Bad of the comic, like he had a monologue and everything! Once again, though, that gets absolutely wasted by Issue 6.

Issue 6

Where do I fucking start?

Let’s start with Jhin. I don’t know about yall, but since we spent a solid 5 issues chasing after him I expected more of a dramatic fight. More like the explosions in Issue 4. But uh we got. Some fancy prop work before he got punched in the face twice and thrown on the ground. It’s What He Deserves but like you know, he deserved worse.

As much as I didn’t want it to happen, I’m disappointed they didn’t unmask him at all. His mask was still fucking pristine by the end of the fight!! Not a scratch, not a chip!! But to be fair I think we got maybe 2 pages worth of a physical fight with Jhin so,, sure. Whatever. Out goes 5 issues of setting up? Not to downplay the conflict in that scene of course, I think it was pretty cool. It was just so anticlimactic at the end like wh-

Kusho! Haha they got us good!! The dead dude is actually still alive oooo~ [heavy sarcasm]. Why. It wasn’t a good twist! It was a “oh. okay yeah sure” twist. This might be my heat of the moment response but I have no words for how cheap and absolutely horseshit that twist is. Good thing we only have to think about it for 10 pages because HE FUCKING DIES AGAIN. WHAT A WASTE!!

Whatever, whatever, thinking about it makes me so mad because they set it up barely in Issue 5? I’m just tired this actually drained me irl.

At least we have baby Kayn and good dad Zed at the end to cleanse us of that.

HEY actually did you know that they thought that Good Dad Zed was considered contoversial by Marvel’s editors?? HUH????

whatever, whatever. i’m pissed.

BONUS SHIT

So Jhin’s lore has now had an update to connect with the comic. And it’s fucking weird. Now suddenly Kusho didn’t care about catching Jhin after he found out it was just a human person murdering people? And that it was essentially Not Their Job anymore??? excuse me??

CONCLUSION?

This comic started with a good beginning and a lot of potential. It brought up so many new theories and so many new headcanons. But all that potential and all that interesting story got washed away with unconnected plot points, ‘important’ characters that show up once, and a cheap twist ending that simultaneously came out of nowhere and was easily predicted (in the bad way). It was a fun read for a while, but the ending has soured the experience I had reading it.

Some issues may come from time + page constraints, and the limitations of the medium. But those were mostly minor issues. I wanna give the artists and the writers the benefit of the doubt, maybe blame Marvel as I like to do. But...

6 months worth of waiting for an ending like this? I’m just disappointed.

#this is really fucking long im so sorry #if you enjoyed the comic- good for you. im glad you had fun. i really truely am.#i was so excited for this series.. i feel almost cheated #long post #zed comic #zed spoilers #jhin reads league

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cleaduvalls · 5 years

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i watched “spy kids” 4 times in 1 week and here are my thoughts

carmen your nightgown is like 200 years old, get a new one

you clearly know this story by heart, you’re saying parts of it. why are you questioning what “take him out” means

a double wig should be more obvious than that

we can see that that’s a glass elevator. people can see you changing, ingrid

nice hat

why did you kill the swan

is that paul rudd???????

how are jets ripping pages out of a book

heart shaped parachutes shouldn’t be working that well

why is there a guitar on your bed. how do you sleep

i think the kids would have seen the track in the floor at SOME point

why is there a jungle gym in their house. i know they’re spies but who has a jungle gym.... in their HOUSE

carmen you’re a frog

i think juni just legitimately try to kill carmen

why are both parents going to school. is that like, a Thing????

juni how do you do that

who puts a video screen in the front seat

hey look its floop. love that guy

they’re not picking on you for the bandages, it’s cuz you brought the toys OUTSIDE your backpack. always put them inside. trust me

did his mirror just.... zoom in?????

h*ck yeah beat him up greg

do all the other kids hate him too??????

dang that hurt

“chief” that’s so white

stupid kid. his dads a spy

that floop doll isn’t even close to accurate

hey look its floop again. love that dude

Big Willy Wonka Energy

oooh skipping numbers i see. love that

why do the subtitles have “mr. floop” as his name. its just floop, yall

“sometimes in order to think big you have to think small” pretty inspirational tbh

oh hes fidgeting!!!!!! love that

woah what are you doing this is rated pg ingrid

i wish my uncles would tell me im shrinking. they just make small talk abt school 😔

this gradenko lady looks like jan from the office

hey its floop again!!!!! love that dude

yes juni. its a fire drill in your own home

these dudes have a jungle gym AND a pool. what the h*ck

why did you pull off your mustache to prove you’re not related. if anything that makes you more related. greg does that too

why did he put the mustache back ON

where did those boats come from

carmen says manual weird. man-yull

right, cuz adrenaline causes warts

“don’t touch anything” *immediately touches everything*

basic boat ettiquette: don’t shit in the boat. those toilets can’t handle anything

is that globe..... punched in???????

floop!!!!!!! love that dude

feet on the desk????? i dunno seems pretty gay

since when did carmen get keys to that

i might be wrong but i dont think thats every country

what does pressure have to do with positioning a laser

this floor is the best mechanic in the whole movie. reminds me of a richie rich comic i had as a kids

why did they not run into the wall. i wanted to see that

is the slide there when floop films his show????

HEY ITS FLOOP!!!! love that dude

theres a bunch of normal food like.... sour worms. why did they pick the slime from charlie and the chocolate factory when johnny depp finds the oompa loompas

thats a sick coat. best one in the movie

that was a good snap. nice acoustics

God what a power move. something thanos would say

listen floop i love you but thats not how you say research

fELIX NO

and hes gone. cool

did she kick the camera?????

haha author unknown. cuz hes a spy

why did you take that one specifically????? plot convenience????

he can still be a spy, just not a good one. learn to read

is that supposed to be a question?????

FUN FACT if you listen closely when carmen says “like felix said” you can hear a weird cut in “said”, almost like its a new clip

theres no keyhole

i think juni can read. why are you spelling it

did you have the floop toys in your pocket????

OKAY THIS SCENE WHERE THEY PLAY IT BACKWARDS?????? THAT MESSED ME UP AS A KID

what do those things do?????

i can feel the pain from the fan blades

how did that break the chain????

why would you annouce that. they can hear you. just because they’re thumbs doesn’t mean they’re deaf

that’s a thing, not a place

FLOOP!!!!! ON A BILLBOARD!!!! love that dude

how are you slipping. shes holding YOU

YOU DROPPED HIM GENIUS

how do people not notice the jetpack dudes

DOES NO ONE CARE THAT CLOTHES WERE STOLEN

that’s a cute coat

why is the lady cool with carmen just... doing that

HEY I LOVE THIS SONG!!!!!!!!! AND THAT DUDE!!!!!

ofc you can’t think “straight enough” you’re gay

why is mexico sepia tone

when do you think juni had time to change and learn a new language

IF IT HURTS TO HIT HIM, S T O P

i wanna be on that merry-go-round

HOW DO YOU K N O W THAT HIS CODE NAME. WHY “MUST” IT BE HOMBRE

i love how junis just like “we already got a fake uncle”

LOOK AT HOW FLOOP IS SITTING!!!!!!!! THATS GAY!!!!!!! HE IS A HOMOSEXUAL!!!!!!!!

ALSO MORE FLOOP!!!! say it with me, LOVE THAT DUDE!!!!!!!!!!

minion looks like barry from friends

wait i lied this coat is better

we DO have uncles like that!!!!!

if your inventions are so good why is your font so BORING

hey wait carmen said that. hmmmmmmmm 🤔🤔🤔

glowsticks dont help you see like at all

the map looks like gallifreyan but its not. spy kids is older than the doctor who reboot

they go ZOOM

THATS NOT HOW YOU SAY MANUAL!!!!!!!

great job carmen YOU wrecked the plane

WHATS A REGULATOR

oh its just a breathing thing

haha pee joke. funney

where are the brains coming from???? that factory is Not Correct

if i were juni i would look back over all the floop’s fooglies tapes and see what the agents were saying backwards. once the mission was done, ofc

it took me like 5 minutes to figure out what sknaht meant the first time

SEE THIS MECHANIC IS GOOD BC NOW THERES NO PLEXIGLASS

WHY DOES NO ONE RUN INTO THE WALL

F L O O P I S G O D

love that dude

you discussed with the spy parents that juni watched the show. he just told you that you took his parents. you KNOW this is juni, why are you surprised that he watches it????? you already know!!!!!!

tbh i kinda want some of those colorful chains. they’d look cool somewhere

haha voice crack

no wonder your shows not doing well. those are awful times

why is there a sexy thumb nurse. why did floop make the thumb nurse sexy

use her first name?????? you’re clearly dating

!!!!!! THEY USED THE SAME TOOL MULTIPLE TIMES!!!!!! UNHEARD OF!!!!!!!

he cares so much about this show!!!!!! its so sweet!!!! love that dude

YEP THIS COAT IS BETTER, LOOKS A M A Z I N G IN A RUNNING SCENE

haha you killed carmen

ok this scene with the acid crayon is like my absolute favorite. something about using a crayon to escape and then floop (love that dude) opening the door a second later and then doing a double take. FAVE

wheres belize

ok so apparently its a country by mexico

no you CANT tell her you need to ESCAPE

we finally got a clean outside shot of the castle.... that place is wack

haha minion can’t sit in the hand chair correctly because hes STRAIGHT what a loser

hey juni HOW DO YOU DO THAT

minion you know what the robot costumes look like AND what juni looks like. dont be stupid

what..... what do you want carmen for, exactly, minion??????

floop is supportive of others’ art!!!!!!!!!!! love that dude

HE SAID “WHERE’S MOM AND DAD” LIKE THEY’RE HIS OWN PARENTS THAT’S SO C U T E

ALSO ANOTHER SCENE WITH THE GREAT RUNNING COAT

he says doppelganger beautifully

“its too late” that timing was BEAUTIFUL

you COULD take 500 brains out if you just TRIED HARDER. still love that dude

his control panel has buttons that spell “floop”

WHY CAN MINION TALK NORMAL

if its reversible why do you have it in later movies

carmen fights fake juni and juni fights fake carmen because they didnt have the fancy clone (?) technology

THREE TIMES!!!!!! THEY USED THE SAME TOOL T H R E E T I M E S THIS HAS NEVER BEEN SEEN BEFORE!!!!!!!!!!!

nice censorship

HOW DID MACHETE SMASH ONLY THE CLEAR WINDOWS AND A L L THE CLEAR WINDOWS THERE ARE NO MORE CLEAR WINDOWS!!!!!! ANYWHERE!!!!!

wow nice 3 buttons thats totally how you hack

oh look they have all died

oh. guess not :((

machete you better rip off your mustache

HES GOING TO JUNIS LEVEL TO TALK TO HIM!!!!!!! HE RUFFLED HIS HAIR!!!!!!!!! HES GONNA MAKE A GREAT DAD!!!!!!!

wow no shit ingrid

did he leave his wart bandaid on the kitchen counter?????

ALAN CUMMING!!!! ON A CEREAL BOX!!!!

ok CLEARLY other people watch floop’s show, he’s rated number 2. kids at the school are gonna recognize juni and carmen. they better get popular

is that george clooney

well that’s not how it works in spy kids 2. or 3. or 4. or the tv show

#this took like 2 hours #spy kids #spy kids spoilers #spoilers #juni cortez #carmen cortez #ingrid cortez #gregorio cortez #minion #fegan floop #floops fooglies #sk1 #robert rodriguez

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