#this isnt anything im just talking rly

[smokestarrules]

something about how the first creatures Bonnie created were at the same level of intelligence as herself and how the first truly dumb creation was made by Gumbald. something about how he introduces the concept of safe stupidity to her and threatens her with it. something about how Bonnie starts calling herself a Princess after she's been betrayed; it's not safe to make people like her, she's learned that now, and it's much better for everyone for them all to be dumb. after all, they're happier this way. Bonnie is safer this way. her vision is protected, this way.

and surely, she's strong enough to protect them all. right?

#this isnt anything im just talking rly #I just love her a lot. thats MY war criminal overlord #adventure time #princess bubblegum #bonnibel bubblegum #uncle gumbald #smokey speaks #also if any of this is wrong let me live ok I’ve watched nearly ten seasons in like 3 weeks #shhhhhhhhh

[tsukana]

i think im really sad that im feeling bitter abt this bc like. despite the fact that ppl are saying oh yeah its purgatory its never fair. i have a bad taste in my mouth that for once it feels like its not bc of player action its partially to do with weird ruling by the admins on the event (re: the essentially. disregarding of the event points on elimination which i still kinda dont get why they couldnt just retally the points since they had the numbers?)

#tsu talks #qsmp crit #qsmp discourse #i mean yeah i was rooting for sneeg but also. i hate that he's blaming himself that if he hadnt spoken up theyd have lost anyway. bc it #wasnt his fault? #and not trying to hate on the admins at all or anything. but despite saying the wrng names #recalculating the scores and just Saying what the score makeup was wouldve solved everything without making streamers need to stream beyond #what they expected on a day that shouldve been primarily abt the egg wars event? #anwyyas shutting up now. this isnt meant to be a super neg or something post this is mostly just me reflecting on the way i feel abt today #and the way today went and the way the event went today. i still had a good time so far #and like i said. i feel sad that i feel this way bc i dont WANT to feel this way. btu like. what can i do abt that yknow. thats just how im #feeling. i really wanna enjoy the event but honestly now that sneegs out he was rly the only purg2 pov i was watching lmao. id watch #etoiles but i cant read translations while im listening at work </3

[arolesbianism]

Some stuff I've drawn semi recently

#keese draws #oc art #oc #ocs #furry #furry oc #furry art #Ive been going thru it recently but Ill survive #on the bright side the pet sitting job for my aunt is coming up soon #so Ill have a house to myself for a bit at least #Im probably still gonna be fairly offline for the foreseeable future unless I somehow manage to fix my sleep schedule anytime soon #not to say I will be on any sorta complete hiatus or anything just that Im not getting any more active most likely #not that I think anyone rly cares at this point since its been the norm for a while now but yknow #Ill still be around to answer asks and stuff just dont freak out if I take a lil bit to see it 👍 #anyways enough of being a downer Im actually pretty happy with these even if theyre mostly just doodles #also I havent posted any art of these guys in a While but say hi to them while you can cause theyre back into the void of my brain now #first is keese (the oc™) second is toon and third is clyve #all from different stories but toon and clyve are both from the magic cat universe #their paths never meet tho the closest connection they have has to go through like 4 characters first #you can also tell theyre from different stories because one is anthro and the other isnt lol #generally speaking I consider anthro designs slightly more canon but both are canon depending on the story #not in a shapeshifting way just in a me being an inconsistent bitch sorta way #but yeah keese the oc is much older than either of those two I just dont talk abt them or their story ever #but hey if any of yall remember suckerz those two are besties #suckerz is sort of younger than the other two and sort of much older than all three #shes a sort of updated version of a reallyyyy old sona sort of character I had in like 6th grade I think #back during my lilo and stitch experiment oc era where I had one that was music themed #I also had a digimon variant of her she was called like beatramon or smth like that #she was basically a hypothetical music mascot and shes kind of still that tbh #if I ever get enough into making music that I start posting shit it will be my music mascot

[turnallthemirrors]

fandom is so strange bc if you praise taylor too much you're a cupcake if you criticize taylor too much you're a fake fan and the definition of "too much" depends on each individual person and the nature of contemporary discourse is that you always have to have a moral or sociopolitical justification for your opinions so everyone is fighting for the moral high ground when it comes to things that really just aren't that deep

#this isnt rly about anything in particular im just thinking esp bc ive been watching a lot of sarah z's fandom analysis stuff #and even tho they never talk about swifties except as a lame jab a lot of what they discuss is relevant to swifties #sydposting

[bittwitchy]

see the reality is i post on my rps usually when nobodys been there a bit and nobody is probably online, but the mental illness in me keeps saying its bc everyone secretly hates me and i dont deserve love, and when i tell a gov doctor that, they basically just say ‘take your antidepressant’s and shut up’ which is also funny when said gov doctor wont refill my fucking antidepressants in the first place

#what i need is smthn for my anxiety and PROBABLY the obviously worsening ocd #but anxiety meds and antidepressants dont mix well #just like adhd meds and anything else dont mix well #which is why i just have a redbull if i need to focus bx it works for a few hours and then i pass out #which isnt healthy but its better than going through the diagnosis process AGAIN bc they dont have my info anymore #its early sad times rn w brina who hasnt gotten an ounce of treatment at all hi #see the other thing is #if i talk about my mental health at all #people will either hate me for being annoying which is what my brain will pinpoint #or feel sorry for me which i also dont want #all i rly wanna do is vent but thats never really an option at all #like yes i know its not normal to want to have a breakdown and cry bc your fucking pillow isnt the correct fluff and wont dluff #i know its not normal to feel like you should die because something wasnt in fhe spot you put it in and was moved slightly #im aware. and the reality is nobody who can do anything about it cares #i have to get an authorization to see a therapist or get meds at all even tho the card claims i dont have to #and the doc tbey gave me wont give me one #they dont allow email so i cant leave a paper trail when bitching at them and my calls go ignored #im losing my mind steadily #and thats not even onto the physical problems #but also the sheer fucking audacity of the website being all ‘oh just go to ERs and UC snd we’ll cover it’ vs hospitals specifically saying #‘we will refuse you if you have Gov Ins unless you have the money to pay out of pocket #if youre on gov insurance you dont have fucking money thats the entire fucking point. you creedy fucknuts go shove tour nepotism in your #fucking eyes and die if anyone doesnt deserve to fuck its you fuckfaces #sometimes i just want to scream esp when this doesnt seem to be most other ppls issues #but then i talk to other women and it is #it just doesnt make sense and i hate it #but i never rly got help on private insurance either so #tbd #depression cw

[piplupod]

me, frequently: i think i am somehow secretly a terrible evil person who needs to isolate themself so nobody gets hurt somehow by the rot that is hidden away at the core of my being

also me, while arachnophobic: i have to catch the spiders that get inside so I can release them outside bc it shouldn't be up to me whether i take a life or not, every life has inherent value and beauty simply by existing, and i have to put them into separate containers while I wait to transport them outside because I don't know if spiders would fight or cannibalize each other when kept in close quarters, and I'll make sure I dont have them in eyeline of each other and also make sure a couple sides of the container are covered by something so they feel safe and don't get too stressed out

#i do not know very much abt spider behaviour unfortunately bc of the phobia fjfkld #makes it rly hard to think abt them much less learn abt them #so i just try to apply general living thing knowledge to them in the hopes i get it right #also this post isnt me trying to say im some paragon of virtue or anything fjfkdl #it is just. so silly. how i wholeheartedly believe i must somehow be secretly evil and morally corrupt #and that i have to continuously hurt myself and isolate myself to make up for ... some secret evilness inside me #when i do shit like this without even rly thinking abt it #and the worst part is im typing all this out while still believing there is a rot inside my soul that everyone should stay away from #and maybe im just making this post to convince myself im okay when in reality im a terrible person (this does not make sense or track) #logically i can know all sorts of things. but in practice? i will still believe all kinds of fucked up things gjfkfl #okay i need to stop posting here good golly!! i talk too much if i let myself onto this account omfg #i hope everyone is doing as okay as they can be in their individual circumstances!!!! 💗 #pippen needs 2nd breakfast #spider mention

[lottieratworld]

rly need to work on like. being ok with disagreements with friends and not letting any minor potential disagreement eat at me bc im an anxious rejection sensitive little bitch

#like. i understand my friends love me and care about me enough that they wouldnt leave me over something like that #but still. i let it get to me #idk #just thinking abt this after reblogging and thinking abt the post regarding tumblrs tendency to reblog without looking into things #not entirely related but its a similar problem in a way #just so any friends reading this dont worry abt it themselves there isnt any specific disagreement im talking abt rn or anything #just like. kind of generally have this habit #also happens with things like friends/mutuals blocking or not liking each other. none of my business i rly shouldnt let that bother me

[saturnsuv]

update <3

#in case anyone remembers the saga about the guy i’d been talking to for like a week then made out with then he promptly ghosted me despite #having given one of those ‘even if it doesnt work out i still want to be friends’ claims and all my additional choosing insanity over it #well. finally got one of my friends to go to the restaurant he works at with me #also keep in mind that that stuff happened in like november we literally havent spoken in months i am just choosing to continue being #insane bc i think i deserve to #anyway. so my friend and i go to the restaurant and unfortunately he isnt there #but before we leave i ask the waitress hey um do you happen to have a coworker named [redacted] #and she was like oh yeah is he a friend of yours? :) and my friend says no. and i say …. i know him #waitress can tell that i dont mean i know him in a good way too. she laughs and says it seems like theres a story here but she doesnt ask #anything further. instead she proceeds to tell me his fucking work schedule ajdjsjjfkf #she was like yeah he worked this morning he usually works thursday mornings then all weekend :) #so shes my new hero #idk if this guy has also gotten himself on bad terms with her or if she just knows what hes like or if she just understood the implication #of an irritated girl coming in asking after a guy bc she ‘knows him’ #but she rly understood the assignment. anyway im in love with her now <3 #OMG i almost forgot the best part. after telling me this she asks do you want me to give him a message and i saw yes i sure would. tell him #sam said hi :) #anyway i will be dragging my friend back there with me at the end of the month on a weekend to continue antagonizing this specific asshole #sam speaks

[nomaishuttle]

okay saur when i get home im gonna try and fill out the insurance form since well im stuck here. once thats through and ive got insurance set up im gonna try and do a proper psych eval bc i reakized ive bever actually had one. and i think itd be very very useful

#ive been on and off in therapy since i was like. before age 7? very on and off though #and i like. i have gad and mdd dxed. i know these #but i think itd be rly helpful for me t have like. a straight up actual real life psych eval so i know what i need to be working on #bc like. mostnof the therapy ive been in is i just go in and dalk abt whatever i want to ralk abt #which isnt helpful 4 me bc i need t be like. guided. bc otherwise i dont rly get into the root of issues #most therapy ive had is just i go in i talk abt the surface level details of something imbuspet abt and the therapist says Okay heres this #worksheet do it when you get home. goodbye ! and then i dont do the worksheet #and ik a lot of that is me not being willing 2 put in the work 4 therapy as well but like. it felt like all my former therapists never #avtually dug into the actual issues. or confronted me with anything #ykwim. idk if that makes sense #idk how ill like. Get to my psych eval thats a problem for future connor. i suppose ill soon be able t save up enough money t get a ride #since ive got Veeeery strict spending rules now. im only allowed t spend likee 240 dollars a konth on fun things and everything else either #goes to rent or debt or savings. this is the rule

[thecolorsfucked]

.

#its like anything involving me that isnt like super positive just gets no anything from my friends now #i cant just complain and vibe bcuz they assume i want emotional support they can't give #and they just default and placate like okay i didnt even ask u for this #i just wanted to talk about how im getting revenge on someone #like im sorry not much good is going on w me rn #but like god idk whatever ill just only talk to friends when its super positive or unrelated to my life #im not a friend anymore just something to take care of ig idk #this is why i hate relying on ppl in any capacity man #they either get resentful or they take on too much and burn out #like i tell ppl to take space when theynneed it i respect those boundaries when theyre in place #i try to voice my needs #ik i get shitty and lash out and rly miserable but fuck dude im trying #ive only told one person about crying the other day #despite that being how ive spent this past two weeks so like #idk man wtf #what do ppl want from me #they just want me to be better and im not getting their and it freaks them out ig #whatever

[damianogender]

"why don't you go and actually watch scorsese/de palma/some other 70s popular director just because they're white guys doesn't mean they can't make deep films how can you say you like cinema and film analysis with this mindset" well you see it's because i don't like them. hope this helps

#goncharov #jokes aside there are some 70s directors i havent seen at all or very little (like scorsese) #and there are some i have developed a pretty good idea of (like de palma) #and the reason i choose not to watch them is not because i dont know they exist or think they're problematic just bc theyre white guys #(+its really annoying when ppl act like de palma or godard or kubrick or polanski or whatever are unknown theyre as popular as it gets) #but it's true i don't think their films are deep enough bc i have seen them and i dont think they understand what they're rly talking abt #i dont think they arent deep bc theyre white guys with big awards but i do think that is one of the reasons that their art doesnt get to me #and im not talking about their ability as a director when it comes to technical things like cinematography editing etc #i couldnt say anything bad about the prom queen scene of carrie by de palma #but i simply do not think de palma actually understands what carrie represents (nor does stephen king tbh) #and yes i think that is because he is a cis straight white guy who i also think is a weirdo just by looking at his directing choices #like im not saying he isnt deserving of the attention he got/gets bc he is a white guy #but i do think he isnt deserving of the attention he gets and he also happens to be a rich white guy #and like even if that wasnt the case i dont think it's an unreasonable thing to assume a rich white guy can understand teenage girl psyche #i wouldnt dismiss anyone based on their race gender level of nepotism etc #in fact despite the pure nepotism (with certain criticisms ofc) i love the work of the new gen coppolas (sofia is one of my all time favs) #im not judging anyone who likes de palma i dont give a shit but dont act like your taste is superior u sound like a 1800s cambridge brat #do you understand what im saying??? basically stop being annoying about goncharov we're trying to have fun

[matoitech]

promare fanfiction is like even if u read one that is generally good (not bad or insulting or gross, i dont read a lot of fics but when i do!) galo is mischaracterized just enough that u still kind of have to either not think too hard or just make up what he’d actually say and how he’d actually respond to get thru it. this is bcuz allistics dont know what theyre doing w him and even if theyre TRYING in instances like this that r borderline in character but not rly there, galos writing and dialogue gets simplified for the author to be able to just kind of breeze over him and generally make him be there For lio. i guess bcuz they dont know what else to do w him if they dont have a good enough grasp on him tk write him as more of a Character

#a lot of it is just like total lack of like .. idk how to put this. he doesnt have any agency for anything #its usually lio pov bcuz lio pov is Easier For People (for some reason i cant imagine why /s) and galo gets like #a lot of identity and backstory if not scrubbed away then it NEVER actually gets played around with or gone into deeper #in a way that would rly like .. boost up the post canon fic or smth cuz like .. why is galo just Fine right now #ur trying to be moderately realistic bcuz lio gets all his shit and u deal w all his implication and trauma #galos just kinda like there #looking hot so lio can have someone to cry to #they r both fucked up and traumatized and autistic together actually ! it can be messy and awkward #relationships can be hard .. esp when u have Shit.. #i think ive also seen a lot of more in character prmare fics still have ppl say ‘i dont have ptsd but i tried to research #to be able to write them ok’ so like even if ppl r truing theyre just never goin to be able to like #rly write it how its actually like . living like this and having relationships like this #AND THATS JUST FOR TRAUMA WHICH ISNT EVEN RLY WHAT IM TALKING ABT HERE ITS JUST SMTH I NOTICE PPL RARELY DO W GALO

[spaceman-spaetzle]

gaaaah i want to make headcanon posts but my energy for tumblr has been officially 1 hit KO'd

#spätzle speaks #this rly isnt to start discourse or anything just an fyi #but i will block and disengage with incest ships as much as possible and it still creeps up on my dash sobs #flees quietly back to discord #i'll probably post later but tumblr sure is the wild west #that being said thank god im not a fan on instagram #i do not have spoons for militant minors either #in general i dont have spoons to talk to kids #also i am like 24 next month and like while im willing to give like advice or something i dont want to hang around a mostly minor space #i very much treasure being in adult only spaces #this went from complaining about incest to complaining about kids LMAO

[kuiinncedes]

bruh like

#my roommate great and all #but girl just copying from chat gpt for this project and like it's allowed and its fast and that 's fair and valid esp since this due tmrw #but i dont like it :c #i dont even know what i want to say but like i just feel so slow and dumb when shes just speeding thru copying whatever chat gpt says #without rly looking at it or anything idk idk #also fucking stupid thing is i was actually looking forward to writing part of this part of the project #bc i LIKE writing html i like writing the html template and rendering it :c #but she just chatgpt-ed it i didnt even realize #until she was like ohyeah we just gota figure this issue out and then its done (if it works) #and she'd already chat gpt=ed all the files #idk bro i just dont trust chat gpt like that lmao TT #i trust it enough but not enough to just copoy and paste from it so quickly #also im very tired so im just sad abt not being able to actually do part of this i fucking guess #but like better for us ig bc we dont have time #idk im just like #wanted to do more for this project bc i kinda failed at the last one as a group member #and i did do more esp for the first part but just like #doesnt rly feel like it idk ndfhbfdgjdbsfjdbfgkfdk #jeanne talks #wait the ...... template isnt even correct bc chat gpt did its own css style but we have style we can use #well ig it's fine and it's probably correct but #ugh idk lmfao just been generally feeling shitty abt academic shit this week anyway so yay #and like girl what the fuck am i supposed to do to help rn . i have no idea what all this shit is i didnt even see u copy and paste it ;-; #what am i doing here in this zoom then i actually have other work to do at this lovely hour of 2 in the morning

[arolesbianism]

Thinking spiraling upwards stuff that doesn't matter to the main plot again. Minkclan first arriving to the territories listening to the other clans argue abt which of them have the most violent history knowing full well that their medic was literally a serial killer and she doesn't even have the highest body count of them

#rat rambles #spiraling upwards #and yes Im still working on it Im just in the designing phase #and lemme tell you. I have SO fucking many cats to design #for context the clan the main character lives in has like 30 something cats #not counting the dead ppl I also have to design #and thats just one of 4 #tbf elmclan is the oldest of the 4 so they might have the most cats but not by much if Im remembering correctly #the youngest of the 4 main clans (minkclan) only has 9 dead ppl at least so thatll be a nice break #anyways I dont think Ive explained literally like. anything abt spiraling upwards asside from murtle existing #I wont go into the actual plot because thats hashtag spoilers but Ill let myself talk abt clan history stuff #long story short the 4 main clans in spiraling upwards are relatively young clans that have rly only recently gotten more settled down #I say relatively cause the oldest is abt 8 years old and thats certainly not nothing for a bunch of cats but like that rly isnt that long #most of the founders of each clan originated from a different bunch of clans far away that all were different degrees of falling apart #there used to be six but one of them left after their leader announced that they were all doomed and took his clan to where the future 4 of #the main story would end up locating because of the story of him #they never did find him and his clan tho rip #a long time had passed before the rest of the shit went down tho so most had kind of disregarded his omen #eventually tho one of the clans shitty leader drove his clanmates to the edge and they ended up violently rebelling against him #his daughter ended up pinning him to the crumbling cliff that he usually made his announcements from by stabbing his neck with a sharp piece #of stone that had broken off of it #and after that his clan mates just started going to town on him tearing through all nine of his lives in only a few moments #and even after that it took several minutes before the remains of his body finally slumped down and the cats stopped tearing at his corpse #after that the crew announced that they the old guy was right and that they were dipping and starting their own clan elsewhere #and those cats made elmclan 👍 #despite being generally the most calm of the 4 this legacy still leads to many horror stories abt their current leader honeystar #and then theres cragclan who was formed after their medic murdered their leader and was like god said we're leaving now cmon #and mink despite having a reputation for being the silliest and strangest of the 4 due to their younger history and ratstar being a silly #goose have a really Really bloody history hell their oldest medic was a serial killer who used snake fangs as her calling card #meanwhile the eagleclan founders basically got the entire clan to chase off the families in power and then just left

[cryptidapprentice]

man,,,

#marine myths rambles #in the tags #dating app diary #i feel so bad bc now that i AM getting matches on these freakin apps i have to Talk and Make Conversation and ideally Meet Up and its like.. #suddenly i am Not In The Mood actually. to talk OR hang out. n i feel BAD bc these seem like nice ppl!!! who id love to at least befriend!!! #(i have bumble n im not listed as looking for anything particular so friendship is in fact an option) #or maybe even smthn more!!! but like. idk why suddenly as soon as i get a match its like '...oh. hmm. idk if i wanna talk actually' 😭😭 #like if i had to guess id say its my gd OCD avoidance response thats making me not wanna do the Hard Thing (Talking) but its also like... #...do i rly wanna meet My Person this way?? CAN i rly meet my person this way???? like so much of my whole desire to date someone is like- #-getting along suuuuper well as friends n being able to click personality n humorwise n shit n THEN im like 'oh id love to date this person- #this person'* im not retyping all tht lol #but being on an app kinda takes tht away for me?? ig im just not made for like. online/internet dating :V #bc i think that Click has to be like. In Person for me to reach that point yk?? like i could click w ppl online n be friends fine!! but like #if we meet in person and that irl interaction isnt like the online interactions (which its usually Not just bc of the nature of Online..) #and we dont Click the same way... its like... man... i dont think we can be romantic partners WHICH I FEEL BAD ABT bc its like. #i dont wanna lead anyone on... so it sucks if we click online but i dont feel that same Click in person 🥲🥲 #idk maybe im just not emotionally ready to date?????? ugh ig ~24yrs of being single'll do tht to a person 🥲🥲 #feel free to dm me w like. advice or smthn if u read all this n have smthn to say 🤷🏽‍♀️ i cant guarantee ill respond (bc im shy 🥴) #BUT ill def read n consider ur words i prommie (also sometimes i dont respond bc idk what to say 😖 but im not ignoring i see u n i hear u) #(not in a creepy literal way. in a figurative way.)