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thewebcomicsreview · 3 months

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Homestuck 2 updated early this month, and we're Yiffy now. It's a Valentine's Day miracle!

Yiffy was one of the most interesting characters in HS2, because literally everyone treated her like shit constantly. Jade's giving her daughter a smooch but also Jade sent her off to a boarding school explicitly because she was embarrassing to acknowledge and also Jade named her child Yiffy Longstocking on a joke and never bothered to change it. In the epilogues, Rose acknowledged that nothing in Candy was "real" and she was joining the rebellion basically for the luls, and one some level Jade and Rose don't think Yiffy is a real three-quarters-human person, and I think they think of her more like an OC in a game they like.

Well, that was my read of HS2, lets see how HSBC handles her.

Oh, this visual is great. Kanaya is so pissed off she's turning into the Ancestor art style in real time. She also kind of looks like Batman, here.

No doubt if your POSSE OF PUBESCENT PUNKS back at school could see you now they'd throw up laughing.

I am suddenly way more interested in Yiffy's gang than I am in half the HS1 cast. What kids join a gang led by a dog girl named Yiffy Longstocking?

Engineering that reprieve might be just about the only real solid your no-show non-mom has ever actually bothered to do for you.

Oh thank christ, there was a part of me worried that Yiffy wouldn't resent her parents for being the second-worst parents in HS2. This is the most interesting thing in the sequels, I think.

TAVVY: ,,, And also, everyone knows you exist now,,, instead of just me,,, TAVVY: And our moms

TAVVY: Wow,,,! YIFFY: TAVVY: You know, i was almost kidnapped,,, once,,, TAVVY: My mom removed the window, after that, TAVVY: Which, um, sucked, TAVVY: Though, i guess you'd know, uh, about that,,,

Oh, interesting. Tavvy knew about Yiffy this whole time? Actually, this and Yiffy's description of him via narration earlier imply they grew up together. I guess that makes sense, since he's Jane's kid and Jade inexplicably put Jane in charge of Yiffy, but he never told Vrissy about her secret sister? That's a bit fucked up, dude. Yiffy's not saying anything (and I hope she doesn't for a long time, until she has something meaningful to say), but her text color is Dave's red, even though she's not related to Dave. Or she is and HSBC is going to retcon HS2's most hated plot point somehow.

Pepis

Look at this ARRANT BEAVIS double fisting those cans of pop

"ARRANT BEAVIS" is a great Homestuckism

The Sylph has been slow boiling, you can tell.

Interesting that Yiffy refers to Kanaya as "The Sylph". I don't know what else she'd call her, I suppose, but Yiffy of all people being the one to mention Classpect is odd.

You've only been around this earth for 15 years, but it's a self-evident fact that there are no useful authorities. Gifted with unimaginable power, their concern only stretches so far as to manhandle those dependent on them, and tangles into ineffectual deadlock the instant it meets a challenge worth addressing. Potential killed for the sake of comfort. True kindness is real, but only for those that bare teeth and break skin. Why should these disingenuous, bystanding, spineless, SELFISH adults get anything they want?

Fuck yes, Yiffy hates all the HS1 characters. I've been hoping for this, she has more beef with them all than even Tavros, and it's a bit of Vriska energy this comic has needed that neither actually Vriska really provides.

Yiffy being the best thing about HS2 was maybe a hot take before, but hopefully it isn't now. She's great.

JADE: and of course you arent obligated to ever forgive me but... i dont want to lose you too! JADE: i love you kanaya JADE: youre my family KANAYA: You Fucked My Wife

This is the best update in the entire comic.

KANAYA: And Though That Travesty Of A Name Is Undoubtedly An Incomprehensibly Offensive Piece Of This Particular Puzzle KANAYA: What I See Is Not An Explanation KANAYA: But A Glossing Over Of The Worst Detail ROSE: Jane.

Yeah, HS2 kind of glossed over Rose/Jade putting TrumpHitler in charge of their literal child. I could copy/paste this whole conversation but basically Kanaya is pointing out that there's like fifty plot holes in Yiffy's backstory and it makes no fucking sense at all and are they going to retcon her to being Jade/Dave's ecto-kid?

ROSE: You've managed to exhume the solemn cadaver of my mother's memory and make her the star of another argument. KANAYA: As If You Ever Bothered To Bury Her ROSE: What does this have to do with anything!? KANAYA: What I Am Doing Is Demonstrating That I Have No Intention To Mediate This Situation KANAYA: Or Pacify It KANAYA: Or Even Be A Little Bit Nice Right Now KANAYA: So Perhaps Youll Actually Take Me Seriously For Once

This is the well-earned sass we've been waiting for since Yiffy's reveal.

ROSE: But more than anything else, I took her up on it because it felt oddly ROSE: inevitable. ROSE: Anyways, ROSE: Deep down, I knew it didn’t matter. ROSE: However we handled it. ROSE: Whatever hurt we caused. ROSE: It was never that serious.

Man, I'm glad that I'm live-blogging and put my read of the situation up as I went because I fucking called it. Yes! I am capable of retaining information when I read instead of staring at the screen slack-jawed.

ROSE: I knew you would forgive me. KANAYA: Rose KANAYA: When Did You Stop Trying JADE: yeah rose!!!!! JADE: what the fuck!!!!

Oh shit, Candy Rose is evil?

JADE: b-but i just dont want things to get even worse!!!!!! KANAYA: Then stop pretending that my feelings are top priority KANAYA: AND TRY BEING HONEST FOR ONCE JADE: WHAT DOES IT EVEN MATTER!!!!!!! KANAYA: Excuse Me? JADE: you heard me! JADE: you were wronged kanaya! JADE: the truth cant change that JADE: saying it just fucking hurts more JADE: what does that accomplish? JADE: its so embarrassing, would you even get it if i had?

JADE: you have no idea what its like out there JADE: how traumatizing dating regular citizens was JADE: imagine trying to love someone who already knows every available detail about you JADE: who has *opinions* on what happened to you as a child JADE: who assumes youre indestructible JADE: newsflash it fucking sucks!!!!!!! because no matter how nice they were JADE: they didnt want to know me JADE: they wanted to date the god of space

I have no notes, this is great and I'm thrilled everyone is mad now.

JADE: so everyone could lecture me again on how "bad" my "boundaries" are? ROSE: (I did that one time.) JADE: you want bad boundaries JADE: do you know how many people would be waiting outside public bathrooms to talk to me about their problems? JADE: this one guy randomly started apologizing because they cooked their hamster in the microwave! JADE: and they looked so sad... i had to hug them and say it was ok JADE: but it was not ok! JADE: they murdered their hamster! Rose: Ugh... JADE: and their other hamster killed itself KANAYA: JADE JADE: out of loneliness!!!!!

What the fuck, this is amazing.

The art here is great, by the way.

JADE: millions of people told me they loved me JADE: but i was never a real person to them JADE: i couldn't let that happen to yiffy too KANAYA: What JADE: i had to save her kanaya! JADE: give her the chance to grow up as a normal kid with a normal life

Jade she's half-dog and she's named Yiffy Fucking Longstocking, that ship has sailed. How are people not going to know she's your child?

Oh, okay. She wears a hat. Sure.

This art is so good!

KANAYA: Even If I Didnt Want Her KANAYA: She Was Already Here

*Makes a note in my "ominous foreshadowing lines journal*

What. Why does Jade have a Frankenstein in her inventory? What's that about?

And that was the update. Honestly? Banger, easily the best HSBC update yet. I could, and if I didn't have DnD in five minutes perhaps would (and perhaps still will!) write a whole essay on this. Phenomenal. A+

#Homestuck 2 #Homestuck 2 liveblog

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davekat-sucks · 4 months

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As much as the postcanon kids are cool in design, I doubt people whenever anyone says “my favorite postcanon character is this kid” because in the epilogues Vrissy was basically a traumadump for Vriska to star her new character arc of escaping the fake and gay candy timeline while Tavros main feature was being timid and nervous, a flanderized version of Tavros Nitram. Harry had like 3 lines of dialigue through the whole story.

Now the sequel, Homestuck^2

The kids have actual dialogue and focus in different updates, Harry is the naïve but well mannered theatre kid with a crush on Vrissy, Tavros and Vrissy are hate dating, and Vrissy is generally a scene kid, and Tavros is the rich child who’s entire status is being a ransom bargain against Jane Crocker to get Yiffy back.

Sure they had some funny dialogue, but they are set pieces for Vriska to be the real main character.

Yiffy doesn’t even talk, she disrupts Gamzee’s funeral.

So it’s revealing why some Homestuck fans like HS2, they like the characters with pretty designs and dialogue that references new memes or has the character say something progressive and do anarchist praxis against Janeald Trumpcker like their hero Bernie Sanders.

Most of all they just want more Homestuck, quality is a second priority to the nostalgia and excitement of new Homestuck content, to regress in age just for a moment and feel what it was like to theorize, create, and read new content with an infinite potential of possible directions the story could go in! That’s why many fans saw the newest Beyond Canon update as “the best one yet!” Because it had their favorite characters doing new things

But what we have now does not have as much potential as people think it does, James Roach brags this story will be long, it will take longer than Homestuck 1 did to finish and may be as long as Homestuck, and the whole story is outlined, so we’re just waiting to see the inevitable disappointment that is Hussie’s plan for a final conclusion to Homestuck written when he was running out of ideas for handling Homestuck as a media franchise.

But it won’t matter, some people just want more Homestuck, regardless of quality.

If people want more Homestuck, they can just do stuff like make their own endings, fanart, fanfic, doujinshi, etc. Or commission someone to make said fanart or plushie. They don't need Andrew Hussie or WhatPumpkin after the webcomic was finished. Homestuck has made pop culture references and current Internet memes every now and then, but I don't think it became this excessive or wink at audience kind of deal. It gets annoying pretty fast. Worst is going Member Berries to old fans that are under Stockholm Syndrome, reading this comic.

Homestuck Beyond Canon being planned to be taking longer than the original base webcomic is very ambitious. Hussie and Whatpumpkin haven't even finished HIVESWAP after 10+ years since its original Kickstarter. If people who were in WhatPumpkin team that move onto the Homestuck Beyond Canon team under James Roach (who is even still working on the music for Hiveswap), couldn't even finish making a game that was paid in $2 million dollars full, how the fuck are they expecting to go OVER 9000 pages to beat the original? Also, aren't Vrissy and Harry cousins, technically? Sure Vrissy is not blood-blood related as she was adopted by Rose and Kanaya, but still being Rose's kid and Roxy being her Aunt, that would make her related to Harry. So troll incest of brother-sister is gross despite being a natural thing on Alternia, but human-troll cousin incest is okay? Talk about priorities on Earth C.

#Homestuck #Homestuck Epilogues #Homestuck^2 #HS2 #Homestuck2 #Homestuck 2 #Homestuck Beyond Canon #Andrew Hussie #WhatPumpkin #What Pumpkin #James Roach

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samstarium · 3 months

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What are your classpect headcanons for the omega kids?

ooh ooh ok! so im goin off the theory that the omega kids will "fill in" all the classes and aspects we only have 2 canon players for atm (aka no other humans have them yet)

i talked abt this a bit in a server so im gonna copy over my ideas!! autistic ramblings below

the one that interests me the most atm is vrissy bc theres the assumption she'll b a standard serket and this a light player, but it would b cool to kill the theory that all descendants need have the same aspect. personally i would love for her to stay a thief but b mindbound instead. for a couple reasons

one hs^2 (or hsbc, or whatever) and especially the candy route is abt how the world and thr characters in it have deviated from The Canon and havin vrissy keep her ancestoral title but on the class side instead is like a fun way to show that. its like oh this is not how its supposed to work is it. two i think tyin her to terezi in a way is kinda interesting. bc there's some parallels that could b made (vriska searchin for a scourge sister replacement, vrissy's relationship w/ harry anderson as a mirror for terezi and john?) but it would have to b explored a bit more since she still hasn't been in the canon for very long

as for the others i rlly want tavvy to b rage… i have him as a sylph but im not married to that. i would rlly love to have a male sylph tho! i think his sensibilities could work nicely, and we already have some (if brief) content of him interactin w/ kanaya (https://homestuck2.com/story/336) so there's potential to strengthen their connections and parallels.

for rage like ofc the purple and gamzee shit and everything puts that in my mind automatically but also. as a contrast to his hope parent and his maid parent. bein a sylph of rage just creates such delicious symmetry. hard to see a sylph-y personality just yet but it's a possibility imo, n rage i think can b interpreted from the gamzee corpse shenanigans

harry anderson im unsure of but w/ what we have i suppose bard of doom could work ok. it would b nice to have a bard who wasnt um. Well. yknow. and show some other parts of the class that weren't represented in the 2 canon bards. there's the obvious connection and punnery involving his affinity for musical theater, and his laissez faire approach to life could serve bard functions.

doom… eh. yea idk abt that but i'll take a stab at it. on a thematic level if sollux's doom craft motif is coding, havin his be stitching is kind of cool. like the connection to binary code in thread (https://www.tumblr.com/swords-n-spindles/625244898586755072/the-fibre-stuff-moiraecrochet-synebluetoo) idk. but on a more conceptual level his upbringing could give him some connections to doom, living with roxy who for the longest time was entrenched in the jane propaganda machine (harry as anti-life?).

w/ yiffy left she takes mage of blood. mage kinda iffy since the canon mages r pretty different and only one gives us much to work w/. one thing i will say on mages tho is that both of them r missin a certain sense: sollux sees no evil, meulin hears no evil, and yiffy? well i'd say she doesn't rlly "talk", at least not yet in the traditional sense, so we can complete the proverb and have her as the third mage who speaks no evil

but blood is a lot clearer. blood, bonds, connections, relationships? thats like the whole conflict of her character. i think phrasin it as yiffy "knowing" blood is kind of fun. bc she probably does have a very keen understanding of the complex relationships between the ppl around her (jane and jake and gamzee im sure she knew much of). also the literal connection of blood to her fangs, and cementing the parallels of her and karkles as blood brothers (lol)

#ask #anonymous #sorry this took a bit to answer!!#homestuck #hs^2 #hsbc #classpect

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h34vybottom · 11 months

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Things that happen in the Homestuck Epilogue and Sequel Comic w/ no context: 1. John finds Terezi and they have sex in his dad's car. After they fuck, John dies and Terezi puts his corpse into her sylladex. 2. Vriska (She's still a teenager) falls from the sky, finds an adult Gamzee and hate fucks him before murdering him. 3. Jane Crocker instills a fascist regime in both timelines 4. Obama turns Dave into a robot 5. Rose cheats on her wife, Kanaya, with her sister-in-law, Jade, because Jade wants a child. Jade is half dog so their child together is also half dog. The child's name is Yiffany Longstocking Lalonde-Harley. Kanaya is fine with all of this after finding out in front of her teenage child, Vrissy, who is a clone of Vriska. There is a bonus chapter, available only to patrons (At the time), where Andrew Hussie (The original comic's creator) and Dirk Strider argue about Yiffy. 6. The Home in Homestuck is blown up by fascists 7. Dirk becomes the narrator and endlessly misgenders Roxy. For some reason? 8. Rose becomes a robot and leaves her wife 9. Calliope lives in the vents 10. Multiple Jades gets possessed by multiple adult Calliopes 11. Rosebot and Dirk create animals that have Obama's face. 12. Jane and Jake name their child Tavros. 13. Swifer, a character named after the Swiffer Wet-Jet, is a lesbian

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quest-draws · 3 years

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[Image description: A collection of rough, coloured sketches of Homestuck characters, mostly depicting characters or scenes from Homestuck^2.

In the top left is Yiffy, swearing profusely while Candy!Jade clasps her hands and says "I'm so proud of her." Yiffy is labeled 'Best Character'.

In the top right is Terezi in her Meat outfit, happily traipsing along with her tongue out.

Middle-left is Harry Anderson, Floating along with a tape measure drawn.

Dead middle is John/June Egbert, floating aimlessly in god-tier jammies with a trans flag in one hand. The words 'April 13th' are squished between the skethces.

Right-middle is Vriska and Vrissy. Vriska says "Alright, let's 8e child soldiers, l8l." with her hands on her hips. Vrissy says "ha ha, I'm in d8nger."

Bottom-left is two sketches of Karkat and Dave. In the first, Dave is looking up at Karkat, seated on a washing machine, saying "wonk." In the next, Karkat takes off his shades and says "Take these stupid things off and wonk at me properly, you fucking cretin," making Dave blush furiously.

Bottom-right is Tavros Crocker, sitting with his head in his hands with a caption that says 'wishing his aunt/sister was a better kidnapper.' End description.]

Happy birth June hope things get better for ya soon.

#homestuck #413 #john egbert #june egbert #karkat vantas #dave strider #davekat #ruby harlonde #yiffany longstocking lalonde harley #jade harley #terezi pyrope #tavros crocker #harry anderson egbert #vriska maryam lalonde #vriska serket #homestuck 2 #homestuck^2 #happy hamsteaks ya'll

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eldrbraus · 4 years

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Did a full Family Tree for Candy.

Yes, Vrissy and Yiffy are half-sisters, and Harry is their uncle and Yiffys cousin. Tavry is also Yiffy and Harrys uncle.

#homestuck #homestuck^2 #homestuck 2 #yiffany longstocking lalonde harley #john egbert #rose lalonde #dave strider #jade harley #jane crocker #jake english #roxy lalonde #dirk strider #harry anderson egbert #vriska lalonde-maryam #tavros crocker #vrissy

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rosemary-is-in-pesterquest · 3 years

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yiffany will always be disappointing to me, just bc the route they took for who she could be is just. boring. like why choose adultery and cheating when you could have an ecto troll-dirk child. there were so many interesting ideas and they went with probably the most boring one so she's always going to be such a missed opportunity to me (also her design sux no offense but its so generic i cannot get into it)

Absolutely no hate towards KimQ, their stuff is amazing, but her design to me personally always felt really clashy and too much going on, plus like Idk about the added buckteeth imo, it doesn’t go too well with the haircut tbh.........................

also story-wise, I think it would’ve been more interesting if her parents were actually Dave and Jade, because then candykat would have to awkwardly deal with this kid who came from two people who broke his heart.

But with what we already have now for the character, it’s just pretty dull and doesn’t make any sense....................any interesting plot points about Yiffy being mad about her life and stuff is just squashed, and her whole character is basically: she’s some kid named Yiffany that barks or something.

I guess Vrissy and Yiffy are sisters because they both disappoint me despite getting a bigger headstart to being interesting characters than the new boys did lol

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coolfire333 · 4 years

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Making a guess that Yiffy is gonna have light hair and glasses, since Vrissy has dark hair with no glasses, Tavros Crocker has glasses and dark hair, and Harry Anderson has light hair with no glasses, so that'd keep the same appearance parallels between the candy (omega?) kids and the alphas/betas.

Also I think she'd have long braids, like the fictional Pippi Longstocking, I've seen a few designs of her with braids or pigtails and I really like the idea, I don't think we've had a kid with their hair pulled up in any way either so that'd be cool imo.

Also because of the whole Jade-Bec...body fusion situation I think she's either gonna be vaguely dog-like (ears and maybe a tail and a loyal but adventurous personality to match?) or totally so (like really anthro, maybe like some sort of werewolf-like design and really feral-acting? I mean if they're lining it up to have 4 new next gen kids and one of them is a troll instead of them all being human then I wouldn't put it past them to make one of the other kids have more nonhuman traits as well...and the two less-human kids would both be girls AND sisters too so hmmm lots of things lining up for this to make sense).

Personality-wise I think she'd be a lot like Jade, really wild and free-spirited but also a sweet girl who loves her family and maybe has inherited some kind of intense curiosity about some kind of occult subject from the Lalonde side of her. Idk just guessing and putting this here when she's finally revealed in case any of my guesses land lol

#SPOILERS #homestuck^2 #theory #talking #yiffany longstocking lalonde harley #jade harley #rose lalonde #vriska maryam lalonde #tavros crocker #harry anderson egbert #text post

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abundantchewtoys · 4 years

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Homestuck^2 re: Chapter 9: “How Goes The Eulogizing, Dear?”

So yeah. The family tree is officially a mess now.

What's more, poor Yiffy falls completely off the shipping grid in the new foursome. She's Vrissy's adoptive sister, Harry's niece/cousin, and Tavros' niece!

I've been thinking what roles, if any, they could all play in a Sburb session. Cause I don't know what, but I'm sure these kids are going to play an important part in the future of Earth C, and an Sburb session is one of the possibilities.

So...

Vrissy the Rogue of Light Tavros the Page of Time Harry the Prince of Breath Yiffy the Maid of Space

Is one of the things I came up with, combining a B2 role with a B1 aspect. Yes? No? Tavros has definitely been having to bide his time, and so has Yiffy. And both roles seem like a good fit for them. And Harry's breath was positively destroyed last chapter while running. :P

The reasoning with Vrissy should be more obvious. She's a wannabe Thief and through Rose and Vriska closely aligned with Light, and through Rose with Rogueness.

Anyway, on to the chapter, which I have no idea who it'd focus on now.

Maybe Dirk? Seems like a Rose thing to say.

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Page 236

Ah. It's what Jake's going to say to Jane.

Anyway, good news! We'll see more of Yiffy. Maybe just in silhouette.

She seems to be wondering a lot about Tavros. Potentially more now than ever before in the boy's life. :(

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Page 237

...

Gog.

She was wondering about GAMZEE'S FRICKIN' CORPSE. Orrrrrrr, maybe, she's preparing a speech to rile the masses to her side. Since she kind of broke things of with Gamzee.

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Page 238

Yyyyeah, Jane's sanity and morality has really been slipping so much. She's just playing on the emotions of her followers now, and convinced herself it's for the greater good.

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Page 239

Why.

Why did Jake's butt now become an actual thing in the art, too.

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Page 240

Brain Ghost Dirk continues to be a voice of reason in Jake's backmind. In this way, I like seeing more of him.

"could I get that once more, sans the racism" pffffffff, smooth, Jake, real smooth. But really, for him, he's really playing the part of idiot manservant/manslave very good!

Jane just considers Yiffy a prisoner, even though she's her grandchild. As for Jake... Yiffy is in a real sense his grandchild, and the grandpup of his alt self's fateful dog, so I hope he can bond with her and help her get to safety in the end.

Blaperile had a good point - Jane misunderstood the concept of kismessitude entirely. And Gamzee actually seemed invested into the relationship, since he genuinely tried to make her improve.

What a difference with Game Over Gamzee and Terezi's relationship.

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Page 241

... Wow.

I thought she'd look very different! Almost polar opposite.

She looks like a Lalonde, dresses snappy like a Strider... Her tail is black like Bec Noir would have had if he had one... Her associated colour is even pink! And she doesn't appear to be wearing glasses either!

... Jane's "seen to her". Please, no. She didn't put a tiara on her, did she... Eesh.

And yeah, her leg's chained down like with the cherubs. :( Please don't have her escape the same way as Caliborn.

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Page 242

Good to see Jake is of two minds about this whole ordeal. It's the only sane way to be. And through Brain Ghost Dirk, he's actually managed to infiltrate the enemy base unnoticed. So really, props to him.

I wonder when we'll get the first reaction out of Yiffany.

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Page 243

Pfff, the material cup on Jane's desk includes a spork next to the stapler.

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Page 244

Ah, there we go.

So Yiffy & Jane are going to have a real Handmaid - Scratch-like chemistry for the time they're together.

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Page 245

WOOOOOOOOW.

Black dog hair, white human hair.

A piercing. Shorts. Jade's eyes.

She looks amazing.

That collar though, it spells trouble.

Red text colour! Oh wow. So her tie & shoes just appeared to be red due to the hue on Jane's ship.

Hmm, according to the source code the text colour is #D00009, that seems to be different from Dave's.

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Page 248

Oh. It's not mind control, it'll just shock her. D:

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Page 249

Ugh. Jane. How low did you even sink.

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Page 252

... Wow. So that's how Jane knew. She enrolled Yiffy in some prestiguous boarding school for Jade & Rose. So I guess that's why she's associated with the colour red, and where the classy tie and upper piece may have come from.

I wonder if Yiffy's faking being knocked out?

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Page 253

... What ceremony? Are they going to parade her around during Gamzee's funerary proceedings?

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Page 255

Tsssh.

... Huh, she's going to get a command already. So did she or did she not get knocked out?

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Page 256

Woooooooow.

The theme changed!

So, we're going to be seeing something in her dreams. Now, let's see whether it'd be a Sburban dreamself!

Blaperile points out that Space players usually wake up sooner than the rest, so yeah, this could really happen. Or it's all wishful thinking.

But if she wakes up on Derse, it'd still be dark outside. It'd also be the first Derse-dreaming Space player!

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Page 257

Wow. So yeah, seems like Harry and Tavros share a bunk bed now, besides sharing a romantic partner (in different quadrants). Pfff.

The big question about this page is, of course, who Vrissy's moirail is, then. :P Also, Tavros' handle confirmed to be GG! :D Well, I'll be. Well, okay, it's the same as Jane's initials.

So I wonder if Yiffy's chumhandle would contain a C, or be AT/TA to complete the set of AG/GG/TG? ... Blaperile proposes TT, because then all their handles would contain the same initials as their mothers'! That's actually a very good proposal!

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Page 258

Ooooh, glutinousGymnast! So he likes working out and eating! Very special combination. Well, he IS the child of a baketress and a wrestler, so yeah.

So it appears he was wide awake. Maybe he doesn't need a lot of sleep.

And he actually sounded a bit more peppy here than he did before. Maybe he's more of a night owl!

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Page 259

So, yeah, it seems Vrissy actually enjoyed seeing Harry and John bond there.

And I suppose John doesn't like being called cute because... I dunno, maybe Terezi called him that at one point. The "strange and funny" man turn-of-phrase there seems is a reference to her, so I think that's why he dislikes being called "cute".

... The thing Harry picked up on might be related to Dave. If he saw his father's demeanour change over dinner.

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Page 260

Hah, so she actually does talk it over with Tavros. See, here? I wonder if they're not better suited as moirails than kismeses.

And there Tavros goes again, he's quite perceptive.

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Page 261

Hmmm, I wonder if Harry was really talking to Vrissy now. It seems like it was more of a Vriska-tone there. Did she hack Vrissy's account?

So Harry saw John being consoled by Rose & Jade over the news about Dave.

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Page 262

Hah, okay, so it was really Vrissy. But she was just on the verge of falling asleep, hahaah. So both Harry and Tavros got keysmashes.

Now Harry and Tavros are going to have a talk regarding knowing people that died. It's a first for Harry, but with Gamzee, Tavros has a form of precedence over him.

HOLY SHIT.

WE CAUGHT UP!!!!!

WE FUCKING CAUGHT UP!!!!!

I THOUGHT FOR SURE IT WAS GOING TO BE ANOTHER COUPLE HUNDRED OF PAGES!!!!!

Hopy shit.

HOPY SHIT.

Now soon, we'll go on to explore the rest of the site and seeing what's what on the Omegaupdate forums! :D :D :D00009

So yeah, I'm definitely invested in the new Homestuck generation. They're plenty of different yet similar enough to be interesting, I want to see how they subvert and resolve certain expectations I have developped.

#homestuck #homestuck^2 #reaction #yiffy lalonde harley #harry egbert #tavros crocker #jane crocker #jake english #liveblogging homestuck #upd8 #brain ghost dirk #vrissy ml

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thewebcomicsreview · 4 years

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Seeing as I don’t have a job right now (one week furlough), I managed to get a lot of writing for Saffron and Sage done today. Now I feel good! Time to ruin that with a Homestuck 2 Liveblog! Last time: Jade kidnapped “Yiffy”, much to Jane’s distress! No time for that, though, as we’re back with the Candyland Kids.

HARRY: vrissy, i know this is a stressful predicament but i think that's going too far. HARRY: my dad believes in us. HARRY: and if he thinks there's something we can do, then there has to be a way!

Kind of interesting that Harry holds his dad’s opinion in such high esteem, considering that his dad has been AWOL pretty much his whole life.

TAVROS: Uncle john isn't to blame for this,,, HARRY: yeah, no shit tav. HARRY: this whole situation is because of YOUR insane hitlermom.

How the hell does Harry Anderson know who Hitler is? When did that conversation come up? This is a completely different universe!

TAVROS: Is less sincere,,, than it is,,, an attempt to weaponize something difficult for me, TAVROS: In order that you can win an argument,,, with harry anderson,,,,, VRISKA: GRRRRRRRRAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!! VRISKA: WILL YOU ALL JUST VRISKA: SHUT!!!!!!!! VRISKA: UP!!!!!!!!

A good example of why characters like John, Jade, Vriska, and sometimes Karkat are important in Homestuck or in stories generally. They actually do shit.

VRISKA: Neither you nor your friends have anything really important going on. VRISKA: Your lives and your planet are a total 8ore! VRISKA: 8ut somehow John loves you anyway. VRISKA: Try and be fucking gr8ful for that every once in a while. VRISKA: Not everyone is so lucky.

Vriska please do not be pining for middle-aged John Egbert. You have literally half a dozen semi-official love interests (John, Terezi, Eridan, Tavros, Meenah and Kanaya), please don’t pick the one old enough to be your dad. It was already weird enough when Adult John got hot and bothered by teen Roxy in the epilogues, to say nothing of you fucking a middle-aged homeless clown in a bush.

thespiansGlamor [TG] began pestering adamantGriftress [AG]

Oh, fuck you, Homestuck. It’s bad enough that Harry and Dave are both going to be referred to as “TG” in chatlogs, but now Vrissy and Vriska are both AG and have the same font color!

TG: i've allocated the strife specibus with the scissorkind abstratus? TG: hm. TG: using this weird vocab and stuff feels... well, weird. TG: i'm not sure why, but it seems as though everything that's about to happen is that much more important now. TG: or maybe it already was, but i just didn't understand just how important until this moment.

One issue with wearing your metaphor on your sleeve as much as Homestuck 2 does is that thematically important lines become really obvious.

I like how the triangle-shaped panel around Vriska escaping the crowd by simply walking into it is reminiscent of a magic 8-ball. That’s clever!

VRISKA: Your society... no, your whole planet... it deserves to 8urn str8 to MEGAhell, and I'm gonna 8e the one to fly it there! VRISKA: I'm gonna shatter your paradise into pieces with my 8are hands and SHIT IN ITS GRAVE!!!!!!!! VRISKA: HOW'S THAT FOR A FUCKING ST8MENT! VRISKA: YOU GOT ALL THAT, JANE CROCKER? VRISKA: DO YOU UNDERSTAND WHAT'S COMING FOR YOU???????? VRISKA: YOU'VE MESSED WITH VRISKA: ********VRISKA******** VRISKA: ****FUUUUUUUUCKING**** VRISKA: ********SERK8T********

There’s some extreme Dungeons and Dragons energy here, where Vriska’s plan to escape a mob of reporters working for a totalitarian dictatorship run by literal gods is to simply walk outside and publicly declare her intent to destroy the world as punishment for its sins.

And yeah, this is how that plan usually works in DnD, too.

Man, the next page is a wall of text, whereas in old Homestuck this’d be an animation. I get “fair wages” and “small budget”, but is still feels weird to see a big Strife scene merely get described with boring-ass words.

Fearing gunfire, the few paparazzi who aren't currently getting their asses handed to them by the world's angriest traffic cone start to trip over each other, diving for cover.

The world’s angriest traffic cone.

Far away, in her lair, Jane Crocker grabs the two sides of her computer monitor with enough strength to snap it in two. She can't believe what she's watching. Behind her, from a shadowy corner of the room, there is an agitated growling noise and the rattle of chains.

Is that Yiffy? Is Yiffy an animal? Please tell me Yiffy is not a person that Jade named Yiffy.

....Actually, please tell me that Yiffy isn’t an animal Jade named Yiffy that is Jade’s child via sex with another animal that might be my breaking point.

Vriska alights on the ground, rakes her throat, quietly spits out a little wad of blue, and wipes her mouth unceremoniously. Tavros pats Harry Anderson tentatively on the arm. Vrissy tries to be badass and cough up something too but she doesn't really make it work.

Vrissy::Vriska Vriska::Mindfang

It’s weird that John’s sprite is the same even though he’s middle aged now, but I like that his God Tier outfit doesn’t fit any more. Isn’t it magical? Ahh, who cares.

JOHN: this old thing is pretty uncomfortable in a lot of ways. JOHN: hm... JOHN: when we get a moment, maybe the two of us could brainstorm a redesign? JOHN: no pressure though. HARRY: !!!

Oh, that’s why! That’s cute.

JADE: theres something i need to tell you

don’thavefuckedadogdon’thavefuckedadogdon’thavefuckedadog

JADE: john... i have a daughter JADE: shes almost harry andersons age JOHN: ... JOHN: ... JOHN: you have a daughter.

Named Yiffy?

ROSE: It was at this point that Jade came to me. ROSE: I could understand her pain quite acutely, and so... ROSE: I agreed to carry a child on her behalf. KANAYA: . ROSE: ... Without telling Kanaya.

Without-

Kanaya is your WIFE. You LIVE WITH HER. Even ignoring the question of why you’d keep 9 months of pregnancy from your wife, how? Kanaya would have been living with humans for years at that point and she’s literally in charge of reproduction don’t tell me she thought Rose just got fat for a while and then lost the weight really fast.

ROSE: I'm... not sure why I made that decision. ROSE: I regret not telling Kanaya, of course. ROSE: But I can't say that I regret going through with it. ROSE: At the time, it didn't feel as though the deception was even all that prolonged. The whole affair was... short. ROSE: Purely physical, and nothing more.

ROSE: John, there isn't a father. ROSE: Jade and I are the sole parents of this child. JOHN: oh. JOHN: ... JOHN: OH. JOHN: oh i'm so sorry, i didn't th- ROSE: That's quite alright John, although you might like to direct that apology more towards your sister. ROSE: All I will say is that if you would like to take up the particulars with us, ROSE: Some *other* time,

Actually, if John doesn’t know that Jade has a male dog’s genitals due to a fusion accident, I’d love to know what that all-caps OH means. What does he think happened, that Jade and Rose managed to have a baby?

JOHN: so... how did you hide the pregnancy? ROSE: Oh, that was simple. ROSE: Jade's genes being, as they are, part canine, the gestation period was substantially reduced.

OH NO

Yiffy is literally a furry, isn’t she? Moreso that Jade, she’s a full-on “Can be naked onscreen and it’s okay because she’s covered in fur” dog girl.

JOHN: i think i understand everything so f VRISSY: WAIT!!!!!!!! VRISSY: YOU MEAN TO TELL ME VRISSY: NOT ONLY DO I H8VE A SISTER VRISSY: 8UT YOU NAMED VRISSY: YOUR ****SECRET CHILD**** VRISSY: ********YIFFY********????????

Vrissy makes an excellent point.

ROSE: We didn't call her Yiffy. ROSE: That would be a quite ridiculous thing with which to burden a child. ROSE: Her full name is Yiffany Longstocking Lalonde Harley.

Vrissy looks as though she is about to shit the belltower they are standing in, brick by brick.

ROSE: It was, in hindsight, a monumentally terrible decision acting as the final chapter in a long series of novels, each one full of progressively more terrible decisions than the last. ROSE: But that is the name that we decided upon.

Oh, wait a second. Vriska changed Vriska Maryam-Lalonde to Vrissy, and changed Harry Anderson to just Harry. So obviously she’s going to rename Yiffy to literally anything else, then rename Tavros, and then we’ve got a new set of four kids as Vriska leaves to do something else. That’s what going to happen, right? Right? Please?

ROSE: You have to understand... this whole situation ended up playing out a bit like an ironic game of chicken between the two of us. ROSE: Something that far outstripped anything that the Strider fraternity could have produced in their wildest, most jpegged creative wet dreams. ROSE: But in the end that triumph of irony came back to bite us in the fucking ass, as irony is wont to do. ROSE: There was absolutely no possibility of us casually letting you all know that, by the way, we had had a secret daughter named Yiffany Longstocking. ROSE: At least, not right away. ROSE: But carapacian change-of-name paperwork is so complex and circuitous that, eventually, keeping quiet forever just seemed like the more reasonable option.

This is, even for Homestuck, monumentally stupid. You named your daughter Yiffany Longstocking as a joke and then kept the child secret because you were embarrassed. You two are awful fucking parents. You are the worst parents in the entire series, and that includes Bro Strider and the spider that made Vriska feed it children.

And we’re literally at the point where the writing is bad and the joke is how bad the writing is. This isn’t enjoyable to read; you can’t make a bad B-movie My Immortal fanfic on purpose.

Even now, Yiffy is likely being held at spoonpoint

I feel like “Jade and Rose have a secret daughter named Yiffany Longstocking” can be a joke or it can be drama but maybe not both at the same time.

#Homestuck 2 #Homestuck #Homestuck 2 Liveblog

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azdoine · 4 years

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vrissy and yiffy could have grown up as sisters. we could have had it all...

#kidding on the square

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overtrolled-liveblog · 3 years

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[234]

long post

ROSE: So, to rewind. ROSE: Jade wanted a child of her own, but while she was with Dave and Karkat the three of them were unable to conceive one due to a number of reasons. ROSE: They looked into adoption, but... ROSE: Well, let's just say that if the administration was getting uncomfortable about an adoption between a troll and a human, they were starting to be outright obstructionist when it came to one between a troll and two. ROSE: Having exhausted all other options for producing or fostering a child between the three of them, Jade had to look elsewhere. JOHN: you mean... JOHN: find a surrogate or something? ROSE: Correct. ROSE: It was at this point that Jade came to me. ROSE: I could understand her pain quite acutely, and so... ROSE: I agreed to carry a child on her behalf. KANAYA: . ROSE: ... Without telling Kanaya.

...

what the fuck? I mean, setting aside the-- what? How do you, like, keep being pregnant secret from your wife? I mean even if your not having sex anymore it gets to the point where it’s pretty obvious? Did she just bounce on her wife for nine months without drawing suspicion? Was time travel involved? What the hell, to say nothing of the fuck. that is still what, by the way. that doesn’t mean anything but i thought it would be funny. Anyway, why did she keep it a secret? Did she think Kanaya of all people, would find nothing noble in mothering for someone who cannot? That she would be unwilling to allow a partner to have sex with someone else, assuming sex is even involved? I gotta keep reading

ROSE: At the time, it didn't feel as though the deception was even all that prolonged. The whole affair was... short. ROSE: Purely physical, and nothing more. Kanaya finally moves to stand next to her wife. She places a softly glowing hand on the shoulder that hasn't been generously watered by Jade. KANAYA: Rose And I Have Already Discussed This In Private Before Coming Here And I Have Therefore Already Said Everything That I Would Like To Say On The Matter KANAYA: And Vis A Vis The Matter I Think Thats Really All That There Is To Say ... KANAYA: I Am Upset At Being Lied To And For No Other Reason KANAYA: And In Particular I Would Like To Make It Understood That I Do Not And Never Will See Jade As Having Jeopardized Our Marriage Through The Simple Crime Of Wanting To Be A Mother KANAYA: If Anyone In This World Understands The Lengths To Which A Person Will Go To Achieve Such An End KANAYA: Then That Person Is Me

So the reason Rose went behind Kanaya’s back is, essentially, no reason. And the mechanics of concealing a pregnancy?

JOHN: so... how did you hide the pregnancy? ROSE: Oh, that was simple. ROSE: Jade's genes being, as they are, part canine, the gestation period was substantially reduced. ROSE: I carried the baby to term in just under two months. ROSE: Since she was unfamiliar with human pregnancy at the time, I assume Kanaya simply thought I was looking a little more... substantial than usual, and didn't think it polite to comment. KANAYA: In Defense Of My Observational Skills I Feel Like I Should Point Out That You Had Recently Recovered Miraculously From A Debilitating And Potentially Fatal Illness KANAYA: A State In Which You Were Exceptionally Malnourished To Say The Least ROSE: Well, quite.

So, she had a fast-developing baby. And, I guess, nursed her in secret, and raised her in secret, in such a way that Jane Crocker figured it out before Kanaya. I gotta say, that definitely puts their relationship in a weird place. I mean, it seems like there is a lot of other issues in a relationship that would have to happen for this sort of situation to occur. Communication problems, at the very least.

But then again, what do I know about healthy marriages? I’m a child of divorced parents and my only serious relationship was an open one that never even approached marriage plans before it ended.

ROSE: Jane has taken Yiffy hostage in retaliation for our supposed kidnapping of her son, and the murder of her former favorite clown. ... VRISSY: WAIT!!!!!!!! VRISSY: YOU MEAN TO TELL ME VRISSY: NOT ONLY DO I H8VE A SISTER VRISSY: 8UT YOU NAMED VRISSY: YOUR ****SECRET CHILD**** VRISSY: ********YIFFY********????????

THANK YOU, Vrissy!

ROSE: Well... no. ROSE: We didn't call her Yiffy. ROSE: That would be a quite ridiculous thing with which to burden a child. ROSE: Her full name is Yiffany Longstocking Lalonde Harley. Vrissy looks as though she is about to shit the belltower they are standing in, brick by brick.

Really Rose? That’s better, in your mind? The irony? You cucked Dave and gave the child the most Dave-ish name possible? What is in your head, woman? Jeez Louise.

#hs2 liveblog #hs2 c8 #long post

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thewebcomicsreview · 4 years

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Baby I like you but saying this last update is Act 5 great is very much a slip on judgement. Every update so far has been some attempt at correcting some slip on writing from that past updates. The problems with the Child is that you have to first accept that these old characters are mockeries of their old selves. Jade, Rose, Kanaya, Vriska and Jane are pretty much one.dimensional at this point. And the Child herself is not interesting, she is pretty much not even compared to one troll.

I like you too, babe, but hear me out. The gimmick of this Yiffy character is that absolutely everyone, even characters we’re supposed to find likable like Vrissy, considers her to be just this disgusting awful embarrassment, even though she’s actually never done anything wrong in her entire life and I’ve only known her one chapter but if anything happened to her I’d kill everyone in this room and then myself and other such memes.

But it can be difficult to square the circle of “Yiffy has done nothing wrong and doesn’t deserve the heaps of bullshit thrown at her” and “Some of the characters (specifically Vrissy) who throw those heaps are still likable protagonists”.

Most examples I can think of leave it a little vague why people hate the character in question, like Boxbot in Gunnerkrigg Court. Boxbot’s whole thing is that he’s “terrible”, but we never see exactly what’s so bad about what he does. If he, liked, shanked cats, then he wouldn’t be sympathetic, but if he never did anything wrong then everyone’s just bullying him. Best to leave it vague, which works fine because Boxbot is a running gag and not a protagonist.

So now we’ve got this character who’s comically sympathetic, who’s been kept away from her family her whole life because her parents are ashamed of her, and is introduced chained up in a cage being fed mac and cheese in a dog bowl and then getting electrocuted so hard she passes out.

And we cut to another protagonist, Vrissy, declaring that Yiffy’s existence is “vomit worthy”. That’s a mean thing to say about poor dear sweet innocent Yiffany Longstocking Lalonde Harley. It’s also clearly going to be a point of conflict between the two. Vrissy has already referred to Yiffy as her sister, but finds her disgusting. I know a character arc when I see one! I also know that, as a living breathing symbol of Rose’s infidelity (and one who’s actually related to Rose, and thus arguably Rose’s “real” daughter), Yiffy probably isn’t going to get a warm reception from Kanaya, either, and if we’re going that far then probably Tavros and Harry are probably not going to be buddy-buddy with the weird kid either. All the sessions in Homestuck starred friendships, but Yiffy isn’t in the friend group. She’s probably getting there eventually, but not at first. It’s a unique dynamic for a set of kids to be Three Friends and the Weird One.

But if Yiffy’s done nothing wrong, and Vrissy’s objection to her is “your backstory grosses me out”, how do you make Vrissy not just this awful 8itch who’s hating on Yiffy for stupid reasons? How do we square “Yiffy did nothing wrong” with “It’s totally understandable that Vrissy hates and is disgusted by Yiffy before they’ve even met”

Homestuck went with a solution that’s incredibly brilliant and gutsy, both despite and because of how stupid it is. They gave this character a stupid name and an enragingly stupid backstory, and then waited an unusually long time to elaborate. It wasn’t that they made a mistake that got everyone furiously mad and are now backtracking, they got everyone furiously mad on purpose so that the “Everyone hates Yiffy” setup would even apply to the audience. How can we judge Vrissy for hating Yiffy, when we live in glass houses and complain about Jade’s dog dick? They got us all mad to make it easier for us to buy in to all the characters in the comic thinking Yiffy’s a disgusting mistake. That’s honestly amazing.

The problems with the Child is that you have to first accept that these old characters are mockeries of their old selves. Jade, Rose, Kanaya, Vriska and Jane are pretty much one.dimensional at this point.

This is literally a plot point, though (well, not for Vriska, but Vriska hasn’t been out of character in HS2 yet). The Jade and Rose who sired this cursed child aren’t the real Jade and Rose, and we’ve been told this explicitly. The real Jade just broke out of mind control, and the real Rose is mindslaved by Dirk. Yiffy’s parents are non-canon, and not only are they non-canon but the fact that they’re out-of-character is something that’s also been commented on and explained. Why should we give a shit about whether they act like the real versions?

They’re no more the “real” version of the characters than Summerteen Romance was. These characters are mockeries of their old selves. And who gives a shit? This story isn’t about Candy Jade and Candy Rose. They don’t matter, except as backstory for Vrissy and Yiffy. It’s exactly the same thing as the Bro being a fucked up and terrible adult Dirk, except in this case we meet the “Guardian” version last after meeting the kid version and they get lines.

The main characters of Candy are Vrissy, Tavros, Harry, and Yiffy. Maaaaybe Vriska sneaks her way in since that’s her whole shtick, but that’s it. Everything else is backstory. I would not be at all shocked if Candyland disappeared and everyone but the new kids all died (especially since Calliope explicitly said the planet would eventually dissolve without her). It’s not about them any more.

#Homestuck #Homestuck 2 #Anonymous

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