#when did it start to be ok to bullie people on the internet for thinking an artist is queer

[weldnas]

-

#Why do people get mad a people who read some Taylor swift song as queer #when did it start to be ok to bullie people on the internet for thinking an artist is queer #like let’s say they are deluding themsleves what’s in if for you??? #nothing #I know next to nothing about Taylor #But do listen to her music and some feels queer to me when I relate them to my experience as a queer person #maybe that’s how those people are feeling maybe they are wrong maybe she didn’t intend for them to be that #but isn’t that the point of art #if it speaks to you it’s speaks to you #you don’t need to becoming after people for thinking that and deducting maybe she is queer #like people are out there preaching about how you can never know how somoene identify as but forget all about it #when it’s some person they don’t like #like you don’t know #literally can’t know #if somoene wants to beleive it let them what’s the harm in it #You just want to make a point on the internet and failing at it #like compassion and understanding doesn’t stop at your favs #miss tay that you’re bashing isn’t even affected by this #Like chill the fuck out #feels even wierd coming from someone from our fandom #like I know loads of you don’t like her but that’s not relevant to the conversation #But if you see smtg you don’t agree with like this idk call a friend and laugh about it #don’t need to put it out there attacking people like it’s a hot takes #Not a good look #Moral of the story #remember kids #ITS OK TO JUST NOT KNOW

[love-islike-abomb]

Scream with me

Roman reigns x Y/n

Warnings: pent up frustration I've been feeling the last few weeks has me beyond fed up so I turned it into what I do best a fic... And a comfort fic at that! Sometimes when Im frustrated this is a song I listen to because one of the lyrics in the song is "stand in the corner and scream with me!" You'd be surprised at just how much letting out a deep scream helps!! Errors I may have missed.

Tag list: @reignsangel444 @acknowledge-reigns @marchm-langdon @mandeelemons @@noisywwerawiconssoul @niknakbucks92 @pittieprincess22 @queengreenarrowmia89 @shadyprincesslife @thesamoanqueen @vintage-pvssy @weirdgirl16355 @windhamsrotunda

______

Why can't people just leave others alone and let them enjoy themselves? Why is it so hard to live your life and let others live theirs? People are cruel evil monsters at times and I would rather be surrounded by animals then people and my husband knew that so him coming home finding me having buried myself underneath our 3 dogs he wasn't surprised. What he was surprised about was the tears that had been pouring out of my eyes. Most the time dog piles helped dry my tears but not this time.

"babygirl what's wrong? Talk to me" he said trying to get me to open up but all I could do was stare off into space. He suddenly ordered our dogs off me "anubis, atlas, Apollo off!" He said, his voice deep yet commanding. they all got off me and went to their beds "sweetheart please tell me what happened! You know I hate seeing you cry" he said still trying to get me to talk. "Why is it that whenever I come up with something creative people have to constantly use my shit? I mean like if I had some that to them they would have thrown a hissy fit 10 miles wide! But they do it to me and I'm supposed to act like it's no big deal?!"

He knew I was pissed. My face still had tear stains but the anger was showing now "and some psycho cow says I'm delusional yet she thinks she did nothing wrong and her ass knows damn well she's a fucking liar! I will post that shit all over the internet if I have to! I give no fucks!! Or that bitch that used ohnmacht and put a 🔥 next to it and her dumbass not realizing you speak Czeck! In German ohnmacht means faint but I'm czeck it means power of fire which explains the 🔥!! Or how about that one bitch who knew I had a choking kink and posted a picture of you grabbing the ref by the collar of his shirt saying 'i'm just trying to make you know who jealous that's all' but im just supposed to act like none of this happened and those bitches can do whatever the fuck they want but if I do it to them and call them out suddenly im the bad guy? Fuck this shit!!! I'm done holding my tongue with this shit and I'm letting it all out!! I don't give a fuck anymore!! And if this is what it takes to show people I've had enough so be it!! I bet they won't bully me anymore!! And I'm sure they fucking remember but will pretend they don't!!" I said starting to yell and I could feel my heart starting to pound harder.

He let go of me and walked to our TV that had a Built in Bluetooth and my phone automatically connected to it "play the song you always play when you're angry" he said. I grabbed my phone knowing instantly which one he was talking about the opening chords hit and as soon as they did i felt my body relax. "Ever feel like dying, ever feel alone..." The rest of the verse played but I was waiting for the chorus and when it came I let lose "stand in the corner and scream with me!! A body full of empty!! A head thats full of rage but i believe it!!" The screaming of the words along with the unbridled rage has released an adrenaline rush i'd never felt before. My heart was beating so hard I had to sit down. He stopped the music and I looked at him "baby are you ok?" He asked rubbing the side of my face, moving my hair out of my eyes. I smiled up at him. "I had a massive adrenaline rush and I feel soooooo much better!!"

He smiled back at me "good I'm glad! But please don't ever let it get that bad again. Promise me you'll talk to me next time!"

"I promise" I said "I love you"

He leaned down and kissed my forehead before moving to my lips "I love you to!"

#roman reigns #big daddy uce #the only daddy☝️😩🫦 #roman reigns fanfiction #wwe fanfiction #roman reigns x y/n #wwe x yn #wwe angst #wwe fluff #roman reigns angst #roman reigns fluff #wwe #Spotify

[verychaoticlife]

Jenny Vi Pham and her game: Going live

TW: Suicide topic, mention of ED, manipulation, death

I know it's not Twitter or tik tok but I think people need to know about this. This post is mostly about Jenny's new game even if she didn't wait for this game to be problematic. Also, this post is about Jenny Vi Pham and only her the others did a great job and I hope they got a lot of money!

1) The story in general

In the first place, the story feels rushed, I'm not the best writer but you can tell that Jenny did not do her own recherche about anything for this game starting with how fast the guy gets followers for doing almost nothing to the hanging ending (I'm talking about this in a minute). The whole story is a mix of Needy Girl Overdose ( the fact he wants 1M in a week and he is helped by his partner) and DDLC for its "disturbing" ending. Ok, it's great you take inspiration for your game but it's so similar and made not in a great way that the game get's boring and cringe really fast. Talking about cringe PLEASE stop making the MC act like you and PLEASE stop making the whole game feel like a booktok comment section. Also to finish this first part the relationship between the MC and the guy. The whole time it just feels like the MC controls everything about this little white hair dude it just feels like I'm playing a toxic relationship simulator (talking about the fact that we aren't guiding him for a better streamer career but we are imposing him stuff like "ban her from modding" or even when he have to apologize and the MC literally choose for him and when he say "I don't think it's a great idea" the MC doesn't listen to him and force him). He has 0 personality unless "I'm gonna take my shirt off on stream and I love my girlfriend" is personality to you. Plus the fact that he is sexualized by everybody in the game is just so sad he kinda deserves better. 

2)The hanging and homicide ending

Now let's talk about real problematic things. First, the hanging ending: so if you don't know he decides to kill himself because he got bullied on the internet cause he apparently hates people with cancer (omg I wish I wasn't serious rn). So yeah the whole reason why he did this is dumb and it explains why I think the story is rushed but you know maybe before he was mentally unstable and it was the event that finally broke him. Nope, he killed himself just like that, there is no indication that he is feeling bad, it just happened. The way she just killed him was disgusting. Suicide is a very serious topic, normally you get signals of those things,  this guy is not killing himself like that. It just feels like the ending was here to just shock people and it did I was shocked because it happened without warning, it was so out of place. I don't really get words to describe this scene cause the picture was very graphic kinda like DDLC but when you play it you know what is going to happen here no and maybe I act like snowflakes but you have to put warnings on those things. Same for the Homicide ending it kinda happened like the hanging ending out of pocket and was very graphic. After playing for a second time normally you get an interaction with the cat (introduced at the start of the story and then forgotten) AND YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT HE SAID?? "yeah I can bring him back if you leave 5,000 rates on itch.io". This whole thing is just crazy to me, you killed him TWO times in the worst way possible (creepypasta writer got competition) and you ask for a good ending if they give good rates... Like what?? when do you think it's ok? You are using his death and his suicide as a way to get reviews and you think it's normal?

3) Her fans and her 

(here some of the information came from Elduator on Twitter)

So after being shocked about the game I decided to read some reviews and saw people talking about her Twitter. It keeps getting worse. First, the way she mocks her fans is crazy it kinda reminds me of that fan/creator relationship in the Vtuber community "you're a clown to me and you like" type of relation she got with her fans. (some proof)

In the first tweet, she is making her fans looks like fools it's obviously a way to encourage them to give more reviews and that's so weird "he needs you" This is just pure manipulation knowing that her fans are probably young people it just making it worse. Kinda the type of manipulation in the second tweet ngl but here she is bringing her team which kinda tells us that some of her team workers support her way of acting. 

this message speaks for itself, disgusting.

She also makes those kind of tweets here again just pure manipulation and making rates on someone suicide 

And here a compilation of some very weird tweet.

The worst is literally the ED joke like what the hell?? and no one said anything it's so problematic in so many levels. Also again the hypersexualisation of her characters but sadly it's something normal on her twitter.

Let's talk about her fans cause they are also CRAZY. They encourage the hypersexualization of her characters, create fake accounts to make more reviews (which get obviously deleted) and are also encouraged by Jenny. They are also a bunch of creeps in general on itch.io or the discord server (proof from Elduator on Twitter)

(i can't fixe the bad quality so look here for better quality)

Ok, I think I said everything I'm thinking about posting it on twitter but someone already did so idk

bye!! XX

#going live #problematic #going live! #yeah ik it's not twitter #visual novel #otome game #itch.io #error143 #jenny vi pham #going live! game

[ashsostrange]

I'm honestly surprised at the amount of people who are still supporting him.He's got his little ((whats left of them at least)) fan base wrapped around his fingers.

“ He’s a minor he cant think for himself, his brain ain't developed!!” “ You don't know what it's like for him at home!” my fav so far “y'all are ablest and racist!! Yall don't care about black people!”

Bitch no one gives a fuck that he is black!! Motherfucker is telling people/threatening to eat glass to get away from what he's said to people. Calling someone out for gaslighting and trying to manipulate people with that shit ain't racist. Also using self diagnosis and laying about taking pill that will “get you high” as a way to get out of all his call outs. This is the stupidest shit I have seen while being on tumblr for the past three or so years like damn!!💆🏾‍♀️

perioddd!! lemme talk my shit again

i honestly giggled when his bf tried to say “y’all hate black people” when pretty much everyone speaking on him is black. why would i do that bc he’s black?? i’m black, not to mention a darskin girl. do with that info what you will.

ppl wna make us seem like bullies so bad. this isn’t just about what happened w catty, hell, it’s hardly about her at all! it’s ab his behavior in general. it’s inappropriate! if he would’ve just owned up, there wouldn’t have been a problem. i’m not obsessed w this nigga, i don’t care to go out of my way to make a post ab him everyday. he’s the one who escalated this further. he only wants us to “mind our business” when we’re not coming for his neck.

ab his mental health, if he doesn’t have a real diagnosis, he needs to not claim mental illnesses like that, but rather acknowledge that something is wrong with him. if you make a mistake, you need to not blame every damn thing on your said mental illness. if anything it’s a justification, but never an excuse. take the initiative to look at yourself and decide if you’re in the right headspace to be on the internet or not. i struggle with mental health, but not in the way he allegedly does. if ik i’m not in the right headspace for something, i step away. he needs to do that. and invest in a diary.

i genuinely don’t know why people are defending him when he did this to himself. if woulda stopped riding my dick like beyoncé rode that surfboard, then maybe we wouldn’t be here right now. accountability isn’t a bad thing. we’ve all made mistakes. i know i’ve made many, it’s about how you address them that matters.

i was literally defending his lame ass when he was sending inboxes as an anon to cause more mess between these two girls. yao was saying he was behind the anon and obv i didn’t believe her bc it wasn’t making sense to me at the time, and there was no real way to prove it. but then he started sending her hella inboxes and tagged all his mutuals saying “war has begun” a whole day later. when i tell you i showed one of my bsfs that post and we LAUGHEDD 🤣🤣🤣 nigga this is tumblrrrr, not a battlefield! from that day i’ve been watching him lmao. didn’t wna say anything about his behavior until i gathered more info cuz i’m not a mean girl (and didn’t want his army bombarding my inbox), but this is ridiculous.

and i’m so glad lia dmed me one day so we could discuss his weirdness. we literally played his ass and he didn’t know. bro was sending her msgs talking ab “i liked your new fic, but you blocked me” and he was the only one she had blocked recently. he sent so many hateful msgs under anon after that, nd he was reblogging it acting like it wasn’t him like… ok weird nigga.

i’m not ableist or “racist” (i’m literally fucking black!) fuck i gotta b ableist for? i’m the last person to rock w any kind of tomfoolery, and all my mutuals and irls know that. i’m unapologetically me on this blog. what you see is who i am.

“he’s a minor!!” so are the rest of us dealing with his bs bro. i’m literally SIXTEEN 😭

like i said, in most situations, if multiple people (with good morals) are telling you that you’re wrong, you can’t be right. i was never disrespectful with him to begin with. you get disrespectful with me, i get disrespectful with you. don’t care who you are ✌️like thank yewww

#ash spills 🌺

[felizusnavidad]

> "most people who used to love lin in the past are his biggest haters now"

> "maybe pjo fandom is not as terrible as i thought"

two things! one: i actually did used to hate lin, but that was a short phase, and i realized i actually was upset at my younger self, and was just taking it out on people and things i associated with who i was at that time

two: that really made me think, so i have some comments actually! they’re not super insightful or conclusive, but: (if you don’t mind)

i think lin and rick riordan (the author of the pjo books) are actually pretty similar? they’re both goofy older dudes with usually much younger audiences (or at least that was true when i was a big-time hamilton fan, things might have changed), and they’re guys who have certainly made mistakes, but overall are good people (and incredible creative geniuses, but that’s a little more lin than rick tbh)

i definitely can be seriously critical of lin, i definitely think he’s corny as hell, and i definitely lightly make fun of him, but only to a point. if it starts looking a little too hostile, i remind everyone (and it’s almost always universally true) that all of us do actually love his work, and if any of us saw him in public we’d all want to ask for a photo and tell him how brilliant hamilton is, or how beautiful in the heights is, or several other wonderful things he’s done. we’re all very eager to see any creative work he’s involved in because we know it’s going to be awesome, so we really can’t complain about him that much

i am much more seriously critical of rick and things he has previously said than i am of lim (also, a lot of pjo fans call riordan "uncle rick", which is, let’s be honest, INCREDIBLY CORNY! like i do it sometimes but it’s GOOFY as HELL!)

i jokingly bully rick as well — i have sent messages about him that are like "dear lord i one day i am going to kick that old man’s ass", or more often just "RICHARD. COME ON." — but it also doesn’t get too mean. when i see comments that stray from genuine criticisms that also acknowledge he’s grown as a person or like a little friendly teasing of a guy we all admire and towards shitty comments about a stranger, i am always the first in line to defend that old man!

a while ago my older sister asked me why "gen z hates lin manuel miranda", and i explained that 1. he did some stuff that isn’t great but also really seems to have grown from that point (and also probably the smallest problem people have with him), 2. a lot of gen z went through hardcore hamilton phases and now resent their past selves (this is a major factor), and 3. being earnest is the internet’s biggest sin (the most likely culprit and also the saddest answer)

making fun of rick is very common in the pjo fandom, and at least some pjo fans bullying lin are doing it in the same way, so it’s supposed to be more "teenage cousins are gently ribbing that one goofy uncle" than actual hate? i know that there are a lot of people that are just genuinely being mean, but i hope you can find some solace that it isn’t quite as much as it looks like

okay this has been weird and maybe a little scattered, i’m blaming it on my adhd medication being way too low of a dosage lmao

but i’m sorry you & other lmm fans haters, (and i’m extra sorry because there’s a decent chance one of them was 15 year old me)

ok, wow. i don't even know how to answer that (anon, this is super long, WHY)...

so first of all, i am not a part of pjo fandom, this is important - i've said this before, i'm gonna say it again: i've never read the books, i started watching the show only because of lin, i know nothing about rick & all those inside jokes you guys have, but if making fun of him is normal in this fandom, that's totally fine. silly jokes & actual hate are not the same thing for me.

"they’re both goofy older dudes with usually much younger audiences" - that is not entirely true & it comes from someone in their late 20s (& i know a lot of people from this fandom who are waaaaay over 20). being goofy & corny, those are not real reasons to hate on somebody like that... actually, everything you said here, i already knew. people are ashamed of their hamilton phase - oh, we should definitely blame lin for that, he's literally the worst because he wrote a musical once & we were super cringe about it... did he make mistakes in the past? yes, we all do, nobody's perfect. i've heard about much more problematic celebrities & people don't even talk about them but for some reason they have to shit on lin all the fucking time. he's done more good than bad (i could write a super long essay for you but it's late & i don't even know why i'm writing all of this), that is the truth & this is where i stand.

now, we are not talking about "making fun of him", we are talking about actual hate, examples:

"lin-manuel miranda should die/we should kill him"

"i would also turn evil if lin was my father/i would kill myself if he was my father"

those are real comments i've seen about him & it all comes from pjo fandom. this is the reason why i said this fandom is terrible. like, are you guys aware that he actually has kids? go outside, touch some grass & leave him alone (i'm not talking about you anon, you're ok, i'm talking about real haters).

#i could write more & more & more... #but you can just scroll my blog if you even want to read it #i've been defending him for weeks cause pjo fandom became insufferable after 3rd episode #so... yeah #it's literally midnight what the hell am i doing with my life #lmm #lin manuel miranda #pjo #anon #i saved every letter you wrote me*

[dearlovedone]

When They Hold Your Hand [Part Two]

Round two of the Blush Blush boys in order. I already did one for Nimh, Volks, and Kelby that I'll link below. I don't know why I struggle with Eli, he's not one of my favorite but like he should have been easy to write. Guess not.

Also lets ignore that it's been a whole month since the last post...

Nimh, Volks, and Kelby Hand Holding Headcanons

tw: none

Eli

✦ Eli is a very affectionate person at heart, always one to give love and willingly receive it. That being said, hand holding is a must with this man.

✦ The man is constantly drowning you in affection, nothing but playful touches and teasing glances from him which are genuine and meaningful. Half the time he never bothers to ask you to hold your hand, he’ll just take what’s his and move along. So if you get flustered easily, know that he’ll more than likely thrive on your oh-so entertaining expressions.

✦ “Come on babe, You’re move at a snail's pace! Oh, what’s wrong? Cat got your tongue~”

✦ Eli loves to rub his hands over your sides, pulling you by you waist so you guys are hip to hip. Maybe get a little bold and give your ass a little squeeze to hear the little noises you make when you are embarrassed by him. But he loves having you right next to him, it gives him so much serotonin to see you matching his pace and vibe. If you flirt back, he’ll tease you back while laughing loudly. 

✦ Eli finds your reactions so adorable that his heart thumps everytime you smile and giggles. His eyes would sparkle whenever he’s around you, it’s like your mere existence brings him so much joy and it’s unbelieve that a babe like you is real. Hell, it’s like you're the human equivalent of a unicorn. So whenever you all together, he’ll do anything to see your perform at your best because with you he can never be at his worst. 

✦ “COME ON LOVE! With the two of us together, the party is only getting started!”

Anon

✦ Similar to Volks, practically the total opposite of Eli, Anon doesn’t really like hand holding as much as you would think due to his own moral agenda. Just the thought of physical touch isn’t something he ever really fully considered. 

✦ The reason behind this is that Anon has always been an internet body, doing his own things and interacting with people anonymously online. So if he ever had a significant other, they most likely would have been from online. So he never saw them in person, so when he finally dates you and sees you on a regular basis and can physically touch you, he hesitates and doesn’t know how to handle himself. That being said, you have to take things like that pretty slowly and at his own confort. He may act confident and sure of himself, but deep down inside he is a nervous wreck.

✦ “ Thanks luv, I really mean it. I just appreciate ya taking time with me here. Daw’ get over here.”

✦ Once he’s comfortable enough, he’s very gentle with you and cares for your wellbeing too. Being a tech junkie and constantly on his multiple devices, he loves it when you come by to ask him if he’s eaten or needed anything. When you grip his shoulders and massage the kink in between his neck, he really gets to relax and looks up to you giving you his full attention. He’d do the same should you be working on anything labor intense, kinda just silently showing that he’s there for you and loves you.

✦ Taking your hand in his, he laughs at the surprise on your face when he instats moments like these. Kissing the back of your hand, he holds it tight and refuses to let go unless it's reasonable. He likes the thought of you stuck with him, smiling to himself as he takes you with him on an errand. This is what couples do, he thinks, slowly becoming one of the normies he once bullied over the internet. 

✦ “I finally bypassed your firewall, luv. Now I am unstoppable with this newfound power, what other achievements can I unlock? Ack- Ok ok I’ll stop teasing, normie!”

Garret

✦ An absolute sweetheart Garret is, he’ll never say no to a face like yours. Holding your hand is a blessing to him if anything, praising how small you are compared to his own putting into prospect of how precious and fragile you can be. 

✦ Because he’s so large and can tower over you, holding his hand can be a little odd as your reaching up to hold his hand. If he could, he would crouch ever-so-slightly to make it comfortable for you. Anything for you, he’ll think. Man finds everything about you precious, complementing you no matter what you do, finding your mannerism adorable that he can only grin happily to have met you. 

✦ “Garret is most happy that you wish to spend time together. He certainly enjoys how soft and squeezable your body is. I could just gobble you up, but not for real.” 

✦ He often will pick you up from behind, princess style and nuzzle his head into your neck and hair. Your natural scent is alluring to him, he can’t get enough so he needs you to fill his entire senses. It’s addicting, how you hold his muscular shoulders and squeal about how he surprised you all of a sudden, the smile on your lips as you laugh is music to his ears and a sight to behold. Man cherishes you like a saint, putting you on a pedestal. 

✦ When you touch him, he gets goosebumps and his heart beats a little faster. He’ll watch you when you trace his tattoos, loving that you admire him in such a way and will return the favor by tucking your hair behind your ear and taking your hand into him, looking at the distance between your fingertips to his. He  fawns over this, intertwining your fingers together and being gentle with your hand, not wanting to ruin such a beautiful thing. 

✦ “You are so precious to Garret. He could not believe just how cute you are, my dear friend. How is he so lucky to have found you~”

[06/02/2023]

Blush Blush belongs to Sad Panda Studios*

#LoveLetters #Blush Blush #eli blush blush #eli x reader #anon blush blush #anon x reader #garret blush blush #garret x reader #headcanons

[monzamash]

just don’t understand why u keep saying you’ve gone off daniel because of ‘what he said/did earlier in the season’ yet ur perfectly happy to write for lando who also made questionable comments idk just feels hypocritical. what made landos comments ok but daniels so horrid lol it makes no sense 👍 if u want to be a daniel hater just come out and say it instead of being all coy about it and pretending like ur not being weird about it cause u say u won’t write for him and then u update ur layout and put up a picture of it lmao so which is it

i don’t know if this is the same anon that’s been sending me shit every second day for months about this - i’m going to give you the benefit of the doubt and say it’s not because of the way you’ve typed this out but the message is still the same and this is the last straw.

i don’t hate daniel. if you look at my last post i said that he’s a big part of why i fell in love with f1. he was also the reason i started this blog so just because i’m not writing for him now, doesn’t mean i hate him. it’s not as black and white for me as it seems to be for you.

writing doesn’t define my blog - its something i do when i feel like it and most of the time i’m either chatting with you guys on here or supporting other writers. it was a fun escape but lately it’s been the opposite of that.

people may not like this but in my opinion daniels comments were significantly more damaging than landos vague response to a question that nobody could factually corroborate. i don’t think i’m alone in thinking that. daniel straight up said the one thing i personally hate the most when someone’s defending an abuser which is, “well [insert name] has always been good to me so…” that’s what upset me the most and now i have no desire to write for him. that is simply how i feel and if you don’t agree/understand, it’s all good. try and find other blogs who do share your views. makes life a lot easier.

anyway, did daniels comments make me want to erase every trace of him from my blog? no but i made it clear that i wouldn’t be writing for him for the foreseeable future and if anything changed, i would give people the heads up. what i absolutely won’t be doing is caving in to bullies who hide behind a shadow on the fucking internet who say i that i should delete my blog and myself while i’m at it.

so the context of why i made a header with daniel in it was that i thought including him would allow people the chance to bounce if they don’t want to read any daniel fics or interact with a blog that had a lot of daniel content in the past - people hate him and have made sure to tell me how fucked i am to still have his fics in my masterlist. thats the sort of hate that really gets to me because i’m so proud of some of those fics and spent a lot of time on them. that’s one reason why I won’t ever delete them but it’s also because there are daniel fans out there who hopefully feel like they can still interact with me even if we don’t share the exact same opinion. i don’t want that to change.

another thing to note is that this header was up for like two seconds and the fact you saw it must mean you’re just stalking my page? are you checking in to call me out the second i do something wrong? and you think i’m weird? alright lol

lastly, saying i’m being coy and weird isn’t fair - i’ve been honest about where i stand and even when i’ve been unsure, i was still being upfront and owning the fact that i didn’t know what direction this blog would take after all that. so if what i’ve said in this post or in the past isn’t enough for you, then just leave please. literally leave me alone because i don’t want to do this anymore.

#monzamail

[suiana]

So to give to a little context first. I have a friend whom I met from my old online school. We have a enemies dynamic. We've each other for 2 years now. When we first met I was the one who talked the most, which he used to see as "annoying". Ever since I left the online school and became busy with my new irl school, I started messaging him less and when I do, he acts more and more nicer and chill than before. To the point he stared flirting with me but I always brushed it off as I also flirt with everybody. Did I forget to mention we are the complete opposite of each other. He's extremely introverted online while I'm literally just putting out my phone number for everyone to see. Irl tho I'm introverted and scared of people unlike him who suddenly has the ultimate rizz and getting into fights with other boys.

One time he messaged me while putting on his just as he got out if the shower. Lemme tell you I was dense af back then. He literally asked for shampoo recommendations. I didn't know anything about men's hygiene so I told him to use a flower scented shampoo. He left for 15mins which I thought was because he was drying his hair. No he was running to the store. He asked for which shampoo brand I use. I didn't want him to know that much about me so I said any sakura scented one.

Another time was when we were talking about a game we like and he thought about cosplaying the character I liked and I thought of it as just some teasing between friends and went along with it by saying I prefer the female characters.

I'm always questioning my sexuality so I'm always joking around that I'm gay and I think that's the reason why he hasn't been straight forward.

He started his own irl school last week and a girl kept looking back and forth at him and when he was about to go home she stopped him saying he could always ask her for help about studies and the school.

And again with a different girl but this time is his deskmate. Apparently every single girl he has met had asked him if he has a gf to which he responded with "not ur business" and I already knew something wasn't right at this point because I have seen his face before and he is mid. Sure ig some girls r into tall boys but he's a freaking emo.

And did I tell you about my suspicion about his deskmate not even being a real girl because the Coincidences if them being neighbors and having way too much in common is too suspicious. Did I also mention "her" personality is completely unreal. She says she's "not like the other girls" and HE him out of all people fricking agreed

And his description of her sounds exactly like me. Short wolfcut, gets mistaken as a boy, kinda tall. Even her behavior is like mine, Just randomly zoning out. And the last thing that completely threw me off guard was her grades. She's the Top of the class. I'm literally part of the student council.

But then I wanted to meet her too if she was comfortable with it but y know what he said.

Idk I can

He thinks I might accidentally hurt her feelings. He has known me for nearly 3 years.

And his response to me was

"Didnt mean it but since she has many mental issues and tried to suicide her self because of got bullied and mocked,i just don't want to makes her feel bad and depressed"

I relate to her so now im always telling him to protect her even if her stories might be worse than mine.

But now that I'm rethinking about it

I think he's lying to me

I heard getting advice from random strangers on the internet is better than getting actual help /j

I actually really like him and I don't have the courage to confront him directly about it

There's a very high chance I'm just being delusional and should continue being some wingman

But I don't have any other friends to tell this and I really need to get it off my chest and get other ppls opinions so I hoped I didn't make too many Grammer mistakes

don't worry about making grammar mistakes it's totally ok

u should subtly try to egg him on for answers

like asking what's Ur ideal type, what would u do if u date me, do u think we'll be more than just friends etc

if he hints that he does like u maybe u can shoot your shot lol haha, and don't be disheartened if he rejects u, there's plenty of fish in the sea :3

imo u probably have a good chance of getting that because he probably likes you ++ no guy I've seen would do such things for someone they just call a friend :)

I hope everything goes well for you bae and all the best

#suiana's sinners

[farmerlesbian]

5, 15, 21, 33

5. Are you “out” publicly? yeah! i am visibly lesbian and visibly trans/nonbinary/gnc and i flag very obviously almost all the time. i am publicly out to everyone. i'm not really able to hide it either if i wanted to.

15. How has your identity changed over time? oof well.. i .. hm. i spent a long time essentially unlabeled for my orientation because i struggled to reconcile being nonbinary and being into Ladies. and i hadn't really had many homo experiences so i wasn't even sure who i was into.

ok let's wind back a bit. so when i was a kid i knew something was.. there. i was incredibly afraid of it. (i guess now we're gonna answer the neurodivergent question haha) i couldn't even name it for myself in my own head. i would not. i was absolutely terrified.

now for context you need to know i was somewhat.. ostracized? i was lowkey bullied and i was very self-conscious, socially awkward, insecure, lonely. you know how people say little girls can tell someone is neurodivergent better than doctors? yeah. so i was extremely concerned with being Normal and being like accepted and having successful social interactions. i did not face concerns about family acceptance or religious homophobia or transphobia. this was about peer acceptance and social isolation/success.

so this is why i was terrified of the ... thing i could not name. so i wouldn't even say i was closeted because i wasn't out to myself. i remember.. telling myself something along the lines of.. like needing to be strong, and keep this secret forever and never let it out never tell anyone, ever. if i can do that it will be okay. this hyper-vigilance.

so i self identified as "boy-crazy", as a half-subconscious strategy to avoid scrutiny. i also tried very hard to make sure to act very Normal about girls and not be too avoidant with my eyes. i developed crushes on boys. now to be clear looking back on it, i intentionally did this and made sure to be conspicuous about it. oh what a time. i even had boyfriends.

around high school time i was on the internet a lot. i added tumblr to the websites i was going on and i found nonbinary people. i was fascinated by androgyny and nonbinary people, and i was learning about like social justice stuff a lot and i was like kinda Ally mode. i can't remember much exactly, i was also very much sleep deprived for much of later high school and mentally not well. i was friends with some gay people. i knew some people who were out by this time. i don't think i was thinking of myself as gay at this time yet. probably open to the idea of neutrality as a gender at this time. if i'd known a word for it i probably would have claimed it and identified with it.

then i went to college and i think something inside me knew i was like planning to be gay in college? like i completely subconsciously was like waiting for it. i was still deeply nervous and afraid but i was around a lot of new people and it's socially acceptable / normal to like experiment and stuff in college. i started experimenting with expressing attraction to women when talking with friends, or using words for myself like butch or dyke. (i didn't really know what the words meant i just was trying them on). i was around a lot more people who were out. i started trying out flirting with girls. i probably thought of myself as bi around this time.

then sophomore year i ended up on in 'gender inclusive housing' - a floor of one door building where any people could be roommates regardless of gender. we called it the queer floor. my RA was trans, manyyy of my floormates were lgbtq. there were a handful of straight people of the floor but the majority were queer. it was dramatic but fun honestly and an incredible experience being surrounded by that, and all the people i met through these people. i definitely started identifying as nonbinary and neutrois and using they/them around this time. i think i used demigirl a little bit but didn't feel super strongly towards it. i met my now-wife in the spring. i don't recall using any super specific words for my orientation other than like queer. i didn't know for sure what my orientation was so i was just keepin it vague. i didn't even really know for sure my gender i just knew somethin was going on!

couple years went by and i met a lesbian friend i became close with and i became more comfortable claiming it as an identity, at the same time as being nonbinary. around that time i started this blog.

and more years have gone by and i still feel like lesbian and nonbinary are true. I feel more secure and confident in being able to be both not a woman or girl or aligned with it at all and also being a lesbian, as well as confident in being into some nonbinary people and still being a lesbian. i think the specifics of my gender labels would include: trans, nonbinary, transgender and transsexual, transmasc (i guess? i'm unsure how i feel about this label and its usefulness in general or its accuracy for me. i kinda feel like sure i guess it is technically correct), neutrois, androgyne, neutral. stuff along those lines.

21. What message would you give to your younger self? bro... i don't even know. "it doesn't have to be great or even good, it just needs to be done". "it's okay to be gay it's okay to say it, it isn't going to help you to try to hide it and you shouldn't expect yourself to keep that hidden away forever it will eat you up inside and you don't deserve that".

33. What about your LGBT identity do you feel proud of/ want to recognize/celebrate? I'm proud that I'm me! I'm proud to be a dyke. I'm proud to be nonbinary. I'm proud to be exactly who I am, whether it's popular or not, whether anyone else gets it or not. I'm proud to be one member of a vibrant and beautiful and messy family. 🌈

send asks / #ask farmer lesbian

#ask farmer lesbian #mod alfalfa #anonymous

[discluded]

Controversial take that's probably gonna get me threatened and bullied in Twitter. Why do I get the feeling that it's not just the Antis and shit that's keeping A off SocMed… I think the toxicness and the demands of some deranged and impatient "fans" are affecting his peace too. Some, SOME "fans" are starting to dictate what he should do… just like what others did before he left Thai-ent. Good thing is he's stronger now and has the support system he didn't have before.

OK I saw like, a glimpse of this earlier this morning but I was working and I really do curate so well I don't see most of the drama. Of what I see it's usually people indirecting the drama so all I can say is: ...yeah.

Listen, we know Apo lurks too but it's perfectly possible to put a wall between engaging with the intentionally toxic internet spaces (tea tiktok/youtube, comments sections, many reddit spaces, many twitter spaces) while also being on the internet. And also 15% of internet traffic is cat content so I'm sure he is able to figure out how to navigate away from toxicity and towards spaces that are shielded from fans.

Apo has it figured out. I wish some fans would take his cue of blocking people who frequently cause drama or leaving when they start feeling bad about a situation. I saw a Known Mile TSS stirring up shit again being indirected again today and instead of even laughing at her usual BS, rolled my eyes and moved on with my life.

#apo nattawin

[incarnateirony]

First of all, even if, and that a big if, FBBC did close its doors, that doesn’t mean Jensen’s a failure. Crap happens and people are moving away from craft beers. It is what it is. Was it a great move to let people go right before the holidays, no, but whatever.

Lastly, quit being such a bully to people sending you asks. That’s not very crisis center like. Happy New Year!

Hey, needy bitch. Am I at work?

Am I getting paid to be your therapist at the moment, no?

Go to a paid therapist or pay me to tolerate your bullshit. I don't know if you noticed, you're not contacting a crisis center, you're harassing a blog on tumblr. I don't know how to explain to you that it isn't the same.

FBBC isn't closing it's doors, Jensen didn't have a failure, the place is not closing or reducing, it's not shrinking, it's not failing. The bullies here are the banshees that scream and root for failure and then start crybully bullshit like exactly this ask when you're pointed out to be a bunch of delusional goblins.

Nobody has to tolerate your horse shit, carol.

My off work rate is 60/hour. So if you want therapy, pay up, otherwise, you're literally a series of lunatics breaking into someone's house day in day out, banging on windows, screaming nonsense about jensen ackles and jared padadicki.

The ask is a nice backroll though. It doesn't escape me the substance is basically, "ok, ok, ok it's not closing we made it up we just have opinions about firing someone and catastrophized it for entertainment. But you're mean for not humoring our fictional delusions GEEZ HOW DARE YOU NOT TOLERATE ANONYMOUS IDIOTS LYING ABOUT THINGS, CALL THE POLICE, I'M UPSET"

Why does this fandom have such a goddamn rabid addictive issue of attacking anyone that knows they're full of shit. Holy shit. Literally all of this ask box warring for an anon to admit it's not closing and they just have an opinion about letting a worker go and when they just said that shit out loud and whined that they literally expect me to be their 24/7 therapist for all of their personal issues, unpaid, regardless of how they treat me, when even as a counselor I have the right to tell people that act just like you to end these behavior patterns or end the conversation. While I'm paid. So what do you think I owe you for this banal chimpanzee behavior when you're on my personal blog on my off day doing the same bullshit? Get real help. And try not to act like a feral jungle child when you talk to a therapist lest you get thrown out.

Hey, assholes. It truly is not going to work. You can type as many words in my inbox to feel like you win an internet fight, but after ongoing months of training about mental health, you are literally incapable of gaslighting me like this. It will not work. I'm explicitly trained on drawing boundaries with you people and identifying when you're experiencing delusional behaviors that are beyond my ability to assist and, if you are not suicidal, then you are not my issue. You have issues miles and miles and miles past my area of supporting you in mental health, so stop pretending I'm obligated to, or that you have any normal social or mental health behavior patterns in how you engage with me. And since you brought up crisis work to feel like I owe you something, it CLEARLY is eating at you rent-fucking free and enraging you that yes, that is my job and yes, odds are it's driving you even deeper into insanity to know I'm the one who passed psych tests and education on mhi here while you compulsively look for unwell and later self-admitted delusional or manipulated attack angles for attention and feeling right, while you know you're comedically wrong. it's genuinely a demand to deal with their toxic ongoing abuse while giving them infinite support for free while they expressly state they have no intention of changing behavior. That's the definition of, ok, bye.

This is my boundary. When you choose to cross it, you no longer get to whine about being Scared* (lol, scared of words without threats) or Uncomfortable* (Ok karen) or Belittled. Like, you literally keep choosing to drag yourself in here to pick fights over shit you later admit while you pretend you aren't admitting your entire reason to be here is attention seeking horse shit and yeah, I'm right, it's not closing, thanks for confirming. Did we need the circus between or are you ready to accept you need therapy?

You Feeling Bad after you read words like this is also not me being Man Bad. It's you going, am I the baddy? No, I can't. And then we cycle this horse shit, every time, and every time you guys get more and more wildin, demanding, and just jackshit insane, because every time you feel more clowned and worse, so man bad, and you refuse to break yourself out of this loop and get some goddamn psychiatric help for your obsessive compulsive, addictive and delusional behaviors.

My time in this fandom always felt like being stalked by the local psych ward, but them demanding i treat them in my anon box like a crisis center call, that's a new one. Is that them admitting they need help?

[theladygazingatemptiness]

on the topic of early dA... see the reason why I’m so protective of young artists now is bc the overall culture of the art community as a whole during the late 2000s to early 2010s was so extremely hostile towards beginners and kids like.. when I first started posting traditional art online in 2009 it was not only socially acceptable to verbally attack (not critique, Verbally Attack) young artists it was lowkey encouraged and I saw Dozens of literal children get cursed out and called horrible names and told to stop drawing and to kill themselves and etc by adults bc they Drew Arms Weird or w/e and then being gaslit into thinking that They were the bullies and the bad guys for getting their feelings hurt and told that they just “”couldn’t take critique”” and sometimes it would escalate to the point where it would turn into a straight up harassment campaign against the 13 y/o who Dared to get upset about some 25 y/o loser with no actual desire to see them improve calling them names and the few people brave enough to actually go “hey um that’s kinda not ok and going too far actually??” would have a harassment campaign against Them too and I remember putting something like “feel free to be harsh and insult me/my art!!” in my bio even though I Knew I was extremely sensitive bc I wanted to seem like Someone Who Could Take Critique(TM)

and plus back then the “cringe culture is dead” mindset wasn’t really a thing yet (hell “cringe culture” wasn’t even a popularized term until maybe 2016) so Bad Art Blogs/Accounts were all the rage and the only Socially Acceptable reaction to having your art stolen and mocked behind your back to thousands of strangers on the internet was to just smile, force out a laugh, and nod; react in any way that’s Slightly more negative than that and you were labeled an Oversensitive Butthurt Killjoy and You would be blamed for having the audacity to post art that The Mods Didn’t Think Was Good or w/e bc how Dare that 12 y/o kid draw things that aren’t extremely photorealistic and detailed!!! how Dare that beginner artist not have a 100% perfect grasp on anatomy the very first time they pick up a pencil!! how Dare a young artist putting out free content for fun not be perfect!! if you don’t come out of the womb producing Van Gogh-quality artwork you deserve to be bullied and harassed, apparently!!

and so all of that made me incredibly insecure about my own art for Years and when I first started drawing digitally I wouldn’t post anything I drew online bc I was terrified of being dogpiled; I remember when I first made my art blog in 2013 and for over a year I was living in Constant paranoia that my art would be showcased on a Bad Art Blog and that everyone would hate me bc my anatomy wasn’t great or w/e. but now, looking back, posting art online is one of the best decisions I’ve ever made and I’ve allowed myself to grow as an artist and I’m glad I didn’t suppress my hobby to appeal to people who don’t and will never have my best interest in their mind.

so basically: I’m here for young artists, I’m here for beginners, I’m here for people struggling to learn how to draw, bc nobody was there for them back then. my advice: Please keep drawing. Please keep sharing your art with the world. Please don’t be afraid of imperfections. despite what Art Snobs might have hammered into your brain, it is Not a fucking crime to not have a complete grasp on anatomy, or not to be well educated in color theory yet, or etc. you don’t deserve to be bullied or mistreated for it. you never did.

#wak #spice tag #this turned into a ramble but. I feel Very Strongly about this #vent / #art positivity #so others can see it I guess #long post #essay post

[miaismyfriendanaismybestfriend]

TW VENT

I think I was bound to grow up with issues. From the time I was around 8 years old my mom would judge me on everything I did. She would pick the little things apart and tear me down. She would comment on my weight, call me “big” and “fat”. I remember when I would be in gymnastics practice and I would look up on the railings (where the parents would stand watching us) and she would point to her stomach (signaling my stomach) and say that “I look ridiculous”. I was 8 years old. From that age to when I was around 13 she would always do it. She would deprive me of food and make me exercise for around 2 hours and if I didn’t, I wouldn’t get to eat. She would have locks on the fridge, the pantry, hide snacks, etc… I remember one time when I was starving and weak and she had let me eat lunch followed by the words “you better be glad I’m merciful”. There was another time when me and my sister hasn’t eaten all day and it was around 11 at night and we were listening to bible study and she told us if we got three questions right we could eat a snack. Well my sister got them right and she got to eat, while I just sat and watched. I was about 9 at the time and my sister was like 12-13. It would get so bad to the point that I had to sneak food because I wouldn’t know when the next time she would let me eat. So I snuck just in case. But that didn’t do me any good because when she found out we would get spanked. A lot. Speaking of spankings, there was a time when she had gave me around 40 beatings with a wooden spoon on my arm right before gymnastics practice. My arm then turned green and purple with bruises and she told me “if anyone asked make up a lie.” I said “ok.” One of my friends did ask and some other people but I specifically remember my one teammate asking. Her name was Kira and she goes “what happened to your arm??” I said “oh I was coloring with sharpie on it” she looked like she didn’t believe me but let it go. It’s crazy how I remember how the whole encounter went down and it’s been 11 years.

She would always have my other sister go along with her bullying antics as well. There was a time when I had posted motivational quotes on my instagram page, (I was 11 at the time) and she ( my mom) would comment under them with mean replies along the lines of “then why don’t you” and my sister would follow. Guess I could say my mom was my first internet bully and real life one.

During the banquet and gymnastics parties where they would have food, my mom always watched me to make sure I didn’t eat anything or eat “more than she would let me”. I would always see her eyes on me when talking to my friends. She would even ask my sister to keep an eye on me to make sure I didn’t “sneak anything”.

She would weigh us and if we gained an ounce or two we would get punished with spankings and lesser food for our meals. I remember dreading “weigh in day” at just 8 years old. When we went to Disney world she would have us run ahead at the parks to get exercise in. If we didn’t, we weren’t allowed to eat.

She would take us hiking every single day along with an hour of inside exercising and on the trails she would run all the way ahead of us and get mad when we would be too far behind. (We were 9 and 12-13) she’d leave us far behind and expect us to keep up with her. If we didn’t “we were out of shape” and “lazy”.

Keep in mind we would also be running on empty stomachs depending on the day or so.

That’s what my childhood consisted of. Weigh-ins, starvation, and fat shaming. All starting at just 8 years old all the way by the time I was 15 years old.

I wish parents would understand the damage and trauma they inflect on young impressionable children. I have no bad blood with my mom now but I do find myself becoming very bitter towards her as I remember all the things she put me through and is the sole reason as to why I am the way I am now.

#vent post #bul1m14 #anorex14 #bulimima #ana trigger #tw ana diary

[thelonesomequeen]

Like guys its okay to call out Alba if she did something wrong. // ok 💆#1 she didnt do it for attention or a distraction #2 even if she did THATS NOT “WRONG”!!! as yall love to point out she is of age, if she wants to show her tits off that her purgative. Her body her choice! It does not give you the right to bash, belittle, harass or talk shit about her. Your not calling her out for bad behavior your being a bully to a stranger online because you don’t like that she is dating you celeb crush

And that’s just exactly it. We’ll never know the intent behind the video going up and who it was for. But there’s a difference between calling out bad behavior and just harassing or bullying someone for the hell of it.

I have no problem with people calling out bad behavior. None whatsoever. Call out the fact that she bailed on her show and refused to promote it. Call out the cultural appropriation photos. Ask why she’s cool with the type of people who’ve said racist and other terrible things. I have no issue with that.

When I start to take issue with it all is as you said, when people become bullies just to do it. Dragging the way someone looks? Her perceived level of intelligence? Slut shaming? That’s a no. And creating multiple accounts on social media to not only go after her, but to leave those types of comments on pages not associated with any of this like people she works with? That’s extremely obsessive and concerning behavior. And that’s when it’s crossed over from “calling out bad behavior” straight into bullying. Because the comments made become about her looks and no longer about the things she’s done.

Ask Justin in a comment why he thinks it’s okay to fat shame and make racist comments. To me that’s fair game because they were HIS negative actions. But going on a movie director’s page to make fun of something like Alba’s hair or face? That’s straight up bullying. And what is it even accomplishing?

Again, I don’t care if people want to call out bad behavior. But to go on and on dragging someone for the things out of her control like her hair, face, or body? That’s no longer calling out bad behavior. That’s just being mean on the internet because you can hide behind an anonymous account. 🦎

[multifandom-onigiri]

For the literal last two days all I have been thinking about is Muu and Haruka and how to defend Muu Kusunoki from the internet

[Edit from after I finished writing this at 8:12 pm: Ok I wasn’t expecting this to take this long to write but also god I hope this comes off well written even if it’s unorganized and really not I’m anxious LOL LOL LOL]

The fact that we’re all jumping on her when honestly, all she’s shown is expressing more of the arrogant and entitled attitude that is implied to her bullied in the first place. And it is funny to me because like. That’s our fault.

On Kotoko’s birthday, we got a brief conversation between Haruka and Kotoko, where Haruka wishes her happy birthday and Kotoko comments about how Haruka’s changed because he used to not be able to talk to her properly. Haruka reasons that it’s probably because the other prisoners, especially Muu, give him a lot of attention. Kotoko then guesses that maybe it depends on how Milgram (“we”) judge them and that it affects the prisoner’s mental state.

(Translation taken from @/MFancult on twitter)

And I don’t think it’s like anything *weird* Milgram is doing (other than I think the guilty people hear whispers? Please correct me if I’m wrong.) A major factor in how we’re seeing this prisoners change from their verdicts is most likely just the verdict itself and how these prisoner’s personalities are affecting how they react to these verdicts.

It’s pretty much outright stated that Muu comes from a wealthy family with parents who seems to spoil her. She has access to things a lot of people wouldn’t have. She can ask them for anything, and they’ll give it to her. It’s no wonder she ends up being arrogant and entitled, thinking that everything can be handed to her on a silver platter. And how we voted only helped to exacerbate that attitude. We’re the ones who voted her “innocent” which, in her perspective, tells her, “What you did was right. You’re not the one who’s in the wrong in this situation. We forgive you.”

And that’s probably what she’s been wanting to hear from the moment she started getting bullied. Why is this happening to me? What did I do wrong? Is this my fault? It can’t be! Because up until now, everything had been fine and gone her way, and now it isn’t in the worst way possible. And I don’t think her being bullied, given her attitude, would really change how she looks at her own actions, but rather gives herself a legitimate reason to portray herself as the victim. Because even if she is a self-centered jerk who needs to learn to grow up, she is the victim in this situation.

I think that’s why her new season 2 voicelines says to Es that she knew she could trust them (us) to make the right call and asks us to not question the decision we made, stating that she “did nothing wrong…right?” It’s not only a combination of her upbringing but also the effects of what being bullied had on her.

It’s been more okay on this app but it’s too unbearable on Twitter to go search up anything about Muu and see she’s getting the same amount of hate as the person who wanted to beat up the guilty prisoners and did beat up some of them. (And like I forgave Kotoko when I watched her MV and I do not regret my decision very much because that was a risk I was willing to gamble. I’m still open to hearing her out through her MV.) Like…she’s just showing more of her actual attitude that we’ve already seen hints of and how that’s affecting the ongoing friendship she has with Haruka.

(I am a heavy believer of the general gist of what happened to Muu did happen, but I am also firm in the possibility that some of it was exaggerated not out of trying to hide the truth but because I feel like she could be a pretty sensitive person.)

The latter is actually very intriguing to me and I have a lot of feelings about that but I want to make it a separate post because I love both of those characters very much. I’ve projected onto both of them for two years and I’ve WANTED them to be friends ever since I got into Milgram. And I think that was very *monkey curls its paws evilly* for Milgram to do, but also thinking about why it’s turned out like this makes me very nervous in a very giddy way, and very giddy in a very nervewracking way. They need therapy NOW

(also if you managed to read this all the way through thank you for reading LOL)

#long post #cinder rambles #i would jump in front of a moving train a bullet going at the speed of light for muu #I’m so excited for Milgram trial 2!!!!! #pjaapuapuapufajpfaphafphafouaf #love my favs! I’m so scared for them!!!

[glennis-hate-blog]

If not Dennis though then who?

if you're asking something other than who would i hate if not dennis, sorry for answering wrong (though the amount that i wrote should qualify my answer as wrong no matter what). i did three reading comprehension tasks total throughout my entire education, and received feedback on none of them. i went completely off the rails so skip to blue, bold text if you just want the real answer

THE ANSWER:

-must of course be contextualised with the fact that when it comes to dennis, i am untethered and my rage knows no bounds. no amount of hate for any other person would substantiate. the runner-up for my-most-hated would compare to dennis as athlete's foot compares to gangrene. having established this, we can move on to establishing why i am dragging my answer out so much. it is because i crave human contact, yet i seem to dislike anyone close to me. the internet provides me with scraps of impersonal human contact that leave me oblivious to the real person, the human behind that interaction. this allows me to feel comfortable enjoying an interaction without convincing myself that i hate the other person. how can i hate someone i do not know? excellent setup! i feast like a starving lion. i suppose that with this in mind, i might claim that if not dennis, i could hate myself the most. but im assuming that we're talking sunny characters here.

it's hard to understand how i feel about the other characters, because i hold my affections about them while aware that they are obviously horrible people.

my mind jumped to dee first, seeing as she shares a lot of the same qualities that make me hate dennis. the most glaring example being that they are rapists. seeing a pattern of this trait in TWINS makes me a little sad though. it shows that what caused this probably had something to do with their parents. the fact that dennis is worse than dee can probably be attributed to his getting raped by the school librarian or whatever it was, as well as how differently their parents treated him on account of his being male. i think some patriarchally motivated power issues stem from that treatment, you can see how he acts out around women in this way (as if i have to explain). anyway dee would make sense as a solid contender. by default ill add her parents to the ring since im blaming them for making her the way that she is.

... im not a huge cricket fan. sure he has his funny moments which i adore, but that is much the same as the reynolds twins. i didnt love him before his decline/the development of his drug addiction, weakness and catholicism repulse me. (HALF JOKE. SORRY. sorry.) i say that he is weak due to his susceptibility to manipulation (a trait he shares with dennis- a man who was tricked into digging up his dead mother 'for gold')- by dee. she wasnt even in her milf era at the time and he left the whole church without even seeing a ring... ok :|. girlie travelled to a bar full of people who bullied and sexually assaulted him to check out a water stain :/ PLEASE. anyway then there's the drug abuse which was actually fairly slay i dont take issue with that. he got better and more acceptable after that in my mind.

third and final person ill seriously consider will be gail the fucking snail. ive seen gail apologists... no... shes not even that bad it's just that shes a caricature of REAL PEOPLE i have to deal with, i totally sympathise with the twins over hating and salting her. idc if she just wants to hang out. she should learn what fuck off means and start trying to find herself, rather than continually finding other people to latch onto obsessively and dissolving into a radioactive puddle of self-pity and non-committal, performative 'shame' every time she is rejected before restarting her circuit of the same 3 people she harasses. oh my god i dont think im talking about snail anymore. whatever. it's what she represents IT DOESNT HAVE TO MAKE SENSE OK THIS IS ABOUT THE PEEPEEPOOPOO SHOW.

scrolling back through all ive written over a simple six-word question, i can see that it is my fucking bedtime. i will be concluding now. ok so i think it's fair to eliminate cricket here, since she redeemed herself by learning parkour and being funny. while i hate gail and everything she represents, she isnt a rapist. she just needs to stop asking for my address and suggesting we have sleepovers and asking whether im a top or a bottom. fucking snail. that would make Dee Reynolds my second-most-hated sunny character! i couldnt hate her with the same fiery rage that i hate dennis, but if there were no dennis, there may very well have existed a dee hate blog.

yip-fucking-ee im so sorry to anyone who thought it was worth investing the time to read any of that, especially the second two body paragraphs. im going to bed now have a fantastic day

#this could have been a one-word answer #i promise im not psychotic #sorry its late and im socially inept #plus i didnt speak to anyone today #recieving this answer must have felt like trying to give a stray dog a biscuit only for it to literally swallow you whole #but this is a sideblog so i can be myself no matter how ugly desperation is <3333 #oh no i think there are me and dennis parallels #dennis reynolds #iasip