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sekhisadventures · 1 year

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The Song of the World

Vol’dun, Two Years Before the Blood War

Vol’dun, a vast desert expanse in the Northwestern corner of the Island nation of Zandalar. Mostly it was cut off from the Zandalari capital of Daza’alor due to the dread swamps of Naz’mir and the mad blood troll cult that dwelled there, but there was little reason for the trolls to come to Vol’dun anyways.

Inhospitable at best, an expanse of sand and rock, occasionally broken by ancient Zandalari ruins or, sometimes, the skeletal remains of some massive beast. Still, some called this desert their home...

See now, a caravan winds its way down from the Torktaga Refuge on the northern coastline. The turtle-like tortolla seek rare growths and fungi that are found in the depths of the desert to craft their potions and inks for their scrolls. In exchange they trade salted fish, jugs of fresh water, medical salves, and other useful things.

Thus why Kiro and his people sought them out. Life in the desert was harsh but with cunning, sharp eyes, and a willingness to work with others it was life. The caravan carts were pulled along by a pair of wooly alpalca, their hides shorn short to help cope with the harsh desert heat, and flanking its sides were riders mounted on hyena, their mounts occasionally giggling and growling excitedly.

The riders however would draw most eyes. Small creatures akin to gnomes or goblins, but covered in glossy fur with long fluffy tails and huge pointed ears, their faces and bodies looking akin to foxes that had somehow learned to walk on their hind legs.

These caravaners were vulpera and their leader was Kiro, a red-furred vulpera with white fur on his muzzle, streaked with gray here and there showing his approaching age. He wasn’t old yet, but he wasn’t a young kit anymore either. He was a shaman, his caravan’s healer as well as it’s leader, but lately he’d been distracted… the elements were whispering to him, but their voices seemed to be out of focus somehow.

As the caravan rode along the rider next to him looked over, “You okay Kiro?” she asked. A female vulpera. Unlike Kiro her fur was as white as the sandy dunes, with black tips to her ears.

Kiro nodded, “Sorry Meerah, just… something feels a bit odd today.” the caravan leader replied. “Its probably nothing.” he replied.

“Hmm… I hope so Kiro. I swear the Faithless are getting worse every day. I heard from the tortolla that another caravan they trade with never showed up…” she muttered in a worried tone.

“That could be a lot of things Meerah. It could be a basilisk ambush, or an outbreak of sandflea fever, or maybe one of their wagons broke a wheel.” he replied dismissively.

From inside the caravan wagon came an annoyed growl, “OR it could be the Faithless Kiro.” it replied.

Kiro rolled his eyes, “Yes yes Nisha, it could be the Faithless… but I don’t think so. They’re going on about their loa all the time, what would they want with us? We’re just some harmless traders. More trouble than we’re worth to them.” he replied. “We just gotta keep our heads down and do our business quietly, we’ll be fine.”

The caravan flaps flew open at this as an annoyed female stuck her head out, the vulpera woman covered in deep scarlet fur, “And what about when we’re NOT fine? Huh? These snakes grow more and more bold every damn day. I say at the next moot we gather up the other caravans and sort them out before they can come after us!” she snapped, her ears folded back and her tail thrashing.

Kiro sighed, “Its not that simple Nisha, there’s a lot more Faithless than there are vulpera. We’d lose, badly. We need to stay out of their way and let the Sethrak sort it out among themselves. Its not our problem.”

“Well sooner or later its going to BE our problem!” she snarled, the two of them beginning to argue as Meerah just rolled her eyes and clicked the reins on her alpalca, guiding them back to the burrow that her people called home.

In the next cart over three younger vulpera sat, their large ears flicking as they picked up the angry voices of the caravan leader and the hotheaded woman.

“Ugh, there they go again…” sighed one of them, flopping back onto the floor of the caravan, “Kiro ‘n Nisha always argue anymore…” he huffs, flicking his tail irritably.

“Yeah, I know Rudo…” said another, sitting on the floor idly tossing a ball back and forth between her paws, “But what can we do about it? We’re just kits, they won’t listen to us. Just let ‘em argue and go play when we get back to the burrows.” she replied. “What do you think Sekhi?” she asked, turning to their companion.

The two were young, barely four summers old, but Sekhi, the third one, was almost thirteen herself. She was supposed to be watching the two, but instead was mostly playing with a flute she’d gotten as a gift for her last namesday. “H-huh? Oh sorry Torra, I wasn’t listenin'…” she replied, blushing.

Rudo and Torra were from the same litter, both of them having pale brown fur, but Sekhi’s hide was a yellowish hue, more akin to the deserts near the edges of Vol’dun herself. While the other two wore just shorts (and a chestwrap for Torra) Sekhi wore a bright red wrap and a long colorful skirt she’d bartered off a goblin merchant that had docked off the coast of Vol’dun some months back, along with a red silken headscarf trimmed with gold.

“Sekhiiiiiii… we was talkin’ about how Kiro ‘n Nisha just fight ‘n growl ‘n stuffs now…” said Rudo, sitting up and frowning at her.

“Oh, right yeah… guess they do…” she looked over in the direction of the caravan, hearing Kiro and Nisha’s raised voices again, sighing. “I dunno, those two are just… bleh… I guess… I mean, I kinda get where Kiro is comin' from. We only gots th' one healer, him, 'n if we did go up against th' Faithless ‘n something happened to him or if too many of us got hurt 'n he couldn’t heal us all… I mean he used to be really strong when he was younger, or at least my ma used to say, but he’s kinda getting on now 'n his powers aren’t as good anymore I think? I dunno, da said something like that…” she began, then went on for several minutes as the two kits shared a look. Sekhi was easily distracted but get her to think about something and that was all you’d hear about until the sun set and rose again.

“So how’d you miss them yellin’? I mean what were ya listening to?” asked Torra, cocking her head slightly and flicking one of her ears.

Sekhi blinked, then frowned and turned her flute over and over in her hands, “I… dunno… I keep thinking I hear somethin'… lately its like… I’ll hear somethin' just over the next dune.” she muttered, “Its… prolly nothin’. It just… sounds kinda like music, like a song I remember hearin’ once but forgot… I dunno.” she shrugged, feeling awkward. She’d mentioned it to her parents, but they told her it was probably just her imagination.

The two kits shrugged, “Well, ya like music. Maybe you’ll be our caravan’s next musician?” suggested Torra with a smile.

Sekhi smiled a bit, “I dunno, I mean all I really know how to play is th' flute… 'n instruments are hard to get out here in Vol’dun… I’d like that though…” she replied, then went back to examining her flute as the two kits sighed. When she got that expression that was all they’d get out of her for a bit. They wondered why Sekhi got put in charge of them, they could have run all the way to Akunda’s Temple and back before she’d notice.

As they did however Sekhi glanced behind them and out of the caravan… she’d swear she just heard something again, the faint sound of a metal drum, and a whisper of song from a voice she remembered as if hearing it in a dream.

The Vulpera Burrows, Two nights later…

Sekhi sat by the campfire, humming softly to herself. It was her namesday today, her parents having gotten her something they’d bargained off a trader who’d passed by on the way south. A small scroll of flute music, though neither one of them had known how to read it. Sekhi didn’t either, but she was hoping she could find someone to teach her. She mostly improvised on her flute.

It was late and most of the other members of the caravan were asleep, save for the guards who kept watch at night… but Sekhi couldn’t sleep. She kept hearing those odd sounds… and tonight they were even louder.

Sekhi folded her ears as she gazed into the campfire, listening to the faint splash of water from their well that led down into an underground river, the whistling of the wind in the dunes, and felt the soft sand under her footpaws. “What is that sound though…” she muttered under her breath, “Its so familiar… but what is it?” she sighed, picking up a twig and tossing it onto the flames.

As she did however, a faint whisper reached her ears, and the vulpera girl suddenly sat bolt upright.

… can… hear us… can you…

Sekhi shivered, her tail fluffing out as she looked around, wide eyed. That sounded like it came from right behind her, but nobody was there! “R-rudo? Is that you playin' a trick? Knock it off or Imma tell your ma!” she said, but the flap to Rudo’s cave was closed and no light was coming from inside it… he must’ve been asleep… right? All she could hear was the wind and the crackle of flames, the guards at the edges of the burrows too far away to be heard.

Sekhi shook her head, her ears flapping around. “Sheesh, maybe I should go to bed… prolly half asleep ‘n dreaming already…” she muttered, sitting back down on the carpet next to the flames…

… yet, she didn’t… the vulpera instead watching the flames dance as the night drew ever on, the moon shining down over Vol’dun from above… and after a bit longer she felt an odd sensation creeping over her… not sleep, but more like a waking sleep… like she was only half there in her body…

Her eyes slipped half lidded as she watched the flames… yet, she almost thought she could hear something in the crackle, a faint sound akin to a fiddle she’d heard played at a moot once several years prior… “Whats… goin' on…” she murmured, watching the flames, mesmerized.

… hear us… can you… listen… hear us…

She blinked, the voices sounding closer now… but they didn’t sound threatening, more like they wanted to be heard, they were desperate to be heard. “W-who are ya?” she asked, her voice trembling slightly.

The wind suddenly gusted through the burrows, but it sounded… odd… less like a howl of wind and more like a large flute itself, a whistling twisting sound that wormed its way into the vulpera’s ear.

She blinked again, feeling a strange pulsing sound from under her feet, the girl standing up as if in a daze… there was almost a beat to it, a tempo, a faint metallic thumping sound with each pulse.

… hear us… can you hear us…

Sekhi swayed on the spot, feeling lightheaded… sleepy, but oddly awake and aware as well… she could hear the water sloshing from the well nearby, the river running under the burrows… but it carried an odd thumping sound now, like a drum being beat continuously.

“… yes…” she whispered, her eyes still on the flames. She couldn’t pull them away if she tried. “I… hear ya… who are ya…” she asked.

… take your flute… join our chorus… play for us Sekhi…

She raised her flute without thinking, holding the mouthpiece just mere centimeters from her muzzle. “… how do ya know my name?” she asked.

… we know… we always knew… we knew the day you sang your birth-song to the world… join our chorus… play for us Sekhi…

“I… I dunno how… I just make it up…” she stammered.

… you will… play and the song will come to you, and from you, and within you…

Sekhi held the flute in place, her fur standing on end… then pressed the mouthpiece into place and put her fingers on the holes of the flute in a seemingly random order… took a breath… and began to play.

It came to her with each note, the girl somehow knowing precisely when to play, when to stop for breath, when to switch her fingers and where. It was a song she felt like she’d known all along but just needed a reminder. She kept going without thinking, her eyes wide as she realized she couldn’t stop even if she wanted to!

As she did the wind began to swirl through the burrows again, kicking up sand around her legs, and a gust caught her and made her spin on the spot as her skirt swished around her legs, yet Sekhi kept playing.

She stumbled close to the flames, but they seemed to rear away from her before she touched them, then swished up into a burst of light and energy almost as tall as she was, then seemed to stretch out and around her, twirling with the wind as if dancing to her song. She could feel their heat, but it didn’t burn her, and Sekhi kept playing!

She wasn’t stumbling anymore, her legs seemed to move on their own, the ground pulsing in time with them under her footfalls, beating out a fast tempo as the wind and fire twirled and twined around her. Nearby the river grew louder underground, as if ready to burst its banks, and soon water splashed up to the edges of the well as if trying to reach her, but Sekhi kept playing!

Then, she heard the voices. So many filling her ears, raised in song! A sudden cacophony like she’d never heard before, singing in time with her flute! Hundreds? Thousands? She couldn’t count them all but she could hear each and every one distinctly. Vulpera yes, but also the deep rumbling voices of the tortolla, the soft hissing voices of sethrak, and even thickly accented troll voices, all joining in a song following her flute, repeating the same words over and over...

Hear us! Heed us! Listen to our song! Let our song guide you! We are the voice of Azeroth! We are the Song of the World! Hear us!

Sekhi was vaguely aware of voices around her, but she wasn’t able to focus on much else right now. Lights shone in caves nearby as sleepy vulpera peeked out wondering who was making such a racket at this hour only to stare in wonder at the sight before them.

Sekhi was in the middle of a swirl of fire and wind, sandy motes flying up around her feet as she played, the well beside her practically bursting with water now!

The earth beat in time with her tempo, the wind and fire danced with her, and the water reached out to join the chorus.

Earth, Fire, Wind, and Water, and the singers, the Spirits of those who dwelled in the land of Zandalar.

Finally, slowly, almost too slowly for her suddenly very tired limbs, the voices grew dimmer, then the girl stumbled to a halt and practically wrenched the flute free from her mouth, her tail swishing behind her. She felt like a bolt of lighting had shot through her whole body, yet… it didn’t hurt. She felt ALIVE, as if she’d only been dreaming half her life.

As the voices faded out, they whispered once more to her in a lyrical voice.

Heed us… hear us… you are our singer, our songstress… carry our voice to those who cannot hear and we shall guide you and keep you safe… carry our song, shaman!

“… shaman.” said Kiro’s voice, the caravan leader chuckling softly. “It seems now we have two.” he nodded, his muzzle breaking into a grin. “I was wondering why I couldn’t hear as much anymore, it seems they were paying attention to someone else.” It wasn’t just Kiro there, it seemed like most every vulpera in the burrows was awake now!

Sekhi blinked slowly, “What… me? But… I’m barely past bein' a kit! A shaman?!” she stammered.

“Indeed.” nodded Kiro, walking towards her. “The elements spoke to you just now, didn’t they?”

She looked down at her flute in her hands, “… not spoke no… they… they sang. It sounded like…” she blinked, her ears pricking up as she realized she could still hear something. A faint metallic tempo with a whistling flute like accompaniment, “Like that! Kiro, you’re a shaman, can’t ya hear that?!” she asked, padding quickly over to the elder vulpera.

Kiro cocked his head, “… just wind to me.” he chuckled, “It sounds different to every shaman though. Maybe I’m not the one they need to speak to right now.” he added, “What does it sound like?” he asked curiously.

“Its… music… like…” she suddenly fell to all fours and pressed her ear to the ground, “… like… a metal drum, or some sorta metal somethin'… I can hear it all over under us!” she said in a shocked voice, then sat up and shook the sand out of her ear, "T-th' wind! It ain't wind, it’s a flute! ... or somethin' like a flute! I…”

Sekhi looked at the campfire, scrambling so close to it that Kiro gave a yip of alarm and pulled her back before she could burn her facefur right off! “Th' flames! Its…” her ears twitched, “Some sort of… ‘bruuuum’ sound, I dunno, something like… that guitar thingy that they were playin' at th' last moot! 'n…” she scrambled over to the well and Kiro managed to grab her in time to keep her from diving right over the edge as she stuck her head in up past her shoulders. “Drums! It sounds like drums! I hear drums! It don't just sound like drums, it IS drums!” she yipped again, her tail flailing behind her.

“Alright ALRIGHT!” gasped the older vulpera, pulling her out of the well with a sudden grunt, “Just… take a breath and calm down Sekhi… a shaman’s first encounter with the elements is always a bit… well… much. Just… relax.”

Sekhi couldn’t though, her eyes were wide as her ears twitched every which way, “I… its all music, its like I spent my first thirteen summers deaf!” she gasped in wonder, “Its like Azeroth is singin' to me!” she yipped, her eyes tearing up, the young vulpera unable to stop smiling now. “Its so beautiful Kiro! Is this what it’ll sound like all th' time now?!”

Kiro was at a loss however, “W-well, probably not all the time… I mean I’ve never heard of a shaman who heard the elements constantly… but… well… I never met a shaman who heard music either.” he admitted with a shrug.

As they discussed his, or rather Sekhi babbled on at her suddenly expanded world, two sets of footsteps drew close and an older pair of vulpera, a man and a woman with the same yellow-sandy fur as Sekhi stepped into the ring of firelight.

“Kiro… you’re saying our girl is the caravan’s new shaman?” asked her father, looking at his excitedly jabbering daughter, the younger vulpera grinning ear to ear as she tried to listen to all the new sounds at once, her eyes still brimming with tears at how overwhelming it all was.

“I believe so Atu, seems pretty certain to me. I mean, she’s definitely hearing SOMEthing, and I could tell that was the elements she was working with a few moments back.” he replied.

At this her mother spoke up, “Um… as exciting as this is, is she going to be like this all the time now?” she asked with a slightly nervous grin.

“Oh I wouldn’t worry Risala. It was a bit of a rush for me too but it tends to wear off…”

“… n-now th' wind sounds like some kinda glass flute! Now some sorta metal one! I think I can hear somethin' else now! I… hotsandseverythin'justwentspinny…” she yipped, then her head rolled onto one shoulder as she fell fast asleep in Kiro’s grasp.

“… somewhat suddenly.” finished the caravan master with a faint chuckle.

In the fullness of time the Horde would come to Zandalar and, over many adventures, would save Vol’dun and all of the island from an ancient threat that long laid buried under the dunes. Following this the caravan would leave Vol’dun entirely for the city of Orgrimmar and Sekhi would begin her own travels under the Horde banner… but this was where it all began for the young shamaness, the first time she heard the Song of the World.

#warcraft #warcraft roleplay #adventures in azeroth #fanfiction #vulpera

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queen-scribbles · 4 years

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throwing the question back at you ;) Jas, how do you feel about your companions?

(answering as things currently stand in her game, so 5/6 of the way done, just finishing up with Irovetti, timeline wise)

“Let’s see, how do I feel about my companions…” She taps her chin with one fingers and swings her feet as she considers her reply. “Well, Amiri’s pretty cool,that’s for sure. Totally reckless and kinda bloodthirsty, which has been fun and frustrating by turns if I’m honest. But I love her enthusiasm, and she’s always ready for a fight, which is handy when you have so many people out for your hide.

“I appreciate Valerie’s… intensity? I guess you’d call it?” She shrugs and curls a lock of hair around her finger, tugging as she picks her next words. “She’s very stubborn and very loyal, both of which make her great to have watching your back. At first I thought she was being a little unreasonable with the paladins of Shelyn, but when I saw how far some of them were ready to take their devotion…. I can definitely see how that would be a wearying atmosphere if you were less gung-ho and not similarly minded. After our confrontation in the temple, I can’t really blame her any more. Still think she could be a little less vitriolic about the order as a whole; it was just a few of them who got really nasty where she was concerned.

“Linzi is the best! We talk all the time, and she’s such a talented writer, and I love having someone else around who’s almost always cheerful–well, Octavia does a pretty good job there, too-and of course, I’m honored she wants to tell my story.” Her lips quirk in a small, wry smile. “She does…. embellish a little more than I would in some spots, but that’s just Linzi. She’s so enthusiastic and excited about everything, it all gets cast in the most dramatic light possible, which I guess is part of why she’s such a great storyteller.” She giggles, bites her lip,.

“Um, who’s next…. “ Her nose wrinkles. “Y’know what, let’s get this out of the way. Jaethal always creeped me out. We disagreed about almost everything, and honestly, I’m surprised she stuck around long enough for things to end… the way they did.” She shifts uncomfortably in her chair and looks down at her lap. “And if I’d known they were going to end… like that, I never would’ve agreed to help her. So much death for absolutely nothing. It was awful and gave me nightmares for days.

“On a less grim, if still somber, note, Harrim’s a gloomy gus, but I think he cares more about his people than he admits. Or maybe even realizes. And Groetus has given him a lot of neat and really useful abilities that Tristian and I don’t have, so that’s really helpful.” She winks. “For all his groaning about death and the end of the world being inevitable, he’s sure saved me from it enough times since we met.

“Octavia and Reg… I kinda have to talk about the two of them together, don’t I?” She laughs. “They’re fun to have around, ‘specially Octavia. Reg doesn’t know when to stop sometimes, and” –she leans forward to whisper conspiratorially–”I’ve been really tempted to shove him in water troughs more times than I can count. But I’m too short, so I just roll my eyes and deal with it. I know he means it in fun. Most of the time. And Octavia’s really fun and sweet and had some really great ideas for things I could do with my hair.” She tugs on the loose lock again. “She’s one of only a few people who can handle this mess. And she somehow makes it look gorgeous whenever I let her do her thing to it. But great as it is to have a friend who can actually help me look the part of, well, Queen now, what I really love about her is her heart. She’s been through hell and came out determined to keep others from suffering like she did. She cares so much about people, especially the ones most would forget. It makes her a wonderful person to serve as regent and that’s a decision I’ve never regretted.

“Jubilost…. Jubilost is a piece of work, He’s a pompous, sarcastic ass, half the time his tongue might as well be coated in the acid he throws at people, and Dreamer save me, I’ve definitely wanted to strangle him on more than one occasion. But the man’s one of my best friends in the world, one I’ve thrown myself in front of various massive beasties to protect with neither regret nor hesitation.” She pulls up one side of her shirt, showing a scar along her ribs. “Manticore thought gnome steaks sounded good for dinner ‘til I smashed its face in. It wasn’t too happy with me, and magic can only do so much. Jube’s honest–to a literal fault, sometimes–principled, bold, determined, and loyal. Wouldn’t trade his friendship or knack for treasury-keeping for all the gold in Golarion.

“People are surprised at my friendship with Ekun , b’cause we’re so opposite; tall and short, quiet and loud, loner and social butterfly” –she giggles at the comparison, playing with her holy symbol–”but I think we’re friends to balance each other out. He’s loyal and driven and I think he’s so strong to keep going after what happened to his family. If I lost mine…. I’d probably curl up in a ball a straight week and cry a new river.

“Kalikke and Kanerah… They’re both something of a mystery, if I”m honest. I haven’t really spent much time with either of them, especially Kanerah. Kalikke and I get along pretty well, but I still haven’t spent much time talkin’ to them.” She wrinkles her nose. “I should prob’ly fix that. It’s kinda rude.

“Nok-Nok’s exasperating and I gotta be honest, Lamashtu kiiiiiinda turns my stomach, especially after…” She clears her throat. “Well, anyway. He’s really good to have in a fight, but I mostly just tolerate havin’ him around.

“Guess that just leaves Tristian.” Her whole face lights up like she swallowed the sun. “It’s not really any kind of secret any more that we’re together, and let me tell you, despite everything that’s happened since I established Sparrows’ Nest, I don’t think I’ve ever been happier. He’s so sweet and cares so much about everyone–even people who tried to kill us, he’s interceding for their lives–and he’s such a good healer. I’ve never more than halfway gotten the hang of healing myself, so his talents in that area are extremely useful.” Her smile dims slightly. “What he went through with Nyrissa’s just… awful, and I don’t really like dwelling on it b’cause it makes me so damn angry how she treated him. Not trying to absolve his responsibility for what he… what he did, but….” the words trail off and she bites her lip. “It’s not important anymore, anyway, ‘cause he’s confessed and sincerely apologized and is trying to help me set things right, stop Nyrissa. The strength that takes…. how could I do anything but forgive him, welcome him back?” She giggles, then add, “And fall even more in love with him. I’ll take however much time we get, however we get it to have it, because meeting him, falling in love… it’s the best thing that ever happened to me. And whatever I have to fight to keep that, Ill tear its damned head off. ….Assuming I can reach.”

#wow that took a while #(some spoilers for post-varnhold vanishing #just to be safe)#jasiri swallowtail #loves to talk and has a lot of companions so there are MANY words #OYYYYYY #this is 1200 words y'all #can you tell i haven't played in a couple months and am fuzzy on her feelings for some people? :D

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fearsbellsarchived · 4 years

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[me? Thinking about a gf fairytales au instead of being productive? More likely than u think!!! think ou.at buT BETTER and w/o the real world dimension hopping part. under the cut bc i just copy/pasted my tags from forever ago to put them in one place

mabel and dipper are hansel and gretal

paz is sleeping beauty

bill is maleficient

if we’re gonna get disney about it wendy as merida

i LOVE the idea of tambry as rapunzel???

mabel can also be like...eric from the little mermaid

so mermando can be ariel

gIDEON AS URSULA/VANESSA IN THAT VEIN THO

bill is also rumplestilskin

stan can be the huntsman (idk from which story cause theres a fEW BUT)

ford is the sorcerer from fanstasia

ford is teaching dipper magic....and instead of a true love’s kiss that’s how he wakes paz (maybe?)

the northwests made a deal w bill like in the most famous version of rumplestilskin but instead of wanting paz for himself he just wanted to steal her body at 16

so when they lose the deal they ask for help from ford and ford’s like “yo i can maybe change the deal??? a little bit???” so instead of bill taking her over when he goes to she falls asleep

so dipper wasnt supposed to wake her up but he found her and fords notes and he and mabel went on an adventure

bill is all the villains

billains

so stan has to leave mabel and dipper in the woods (idk y it wasnt for long the twins are just impatient) so stan disappears and the twins are like “lETS EXPLORE THE WOODS”

they come across some creepy old house w a lot of spiderwebs (can u guess the villain yet?)

an older woman comes out and is like “why are you guys lost in the forest?”

mabel points to the glitter trail “we’re not lost”

dipper looks behind them ‘mabel!!! where’s all the glitter?!”

(ACTUALLY MAYBE ITS YARN???)

so they lose the trail

meanwhile stan is losing his fucking mind

he follows the stray glitter but it’s blown all over

he feels “LOST IN THE WOOOOODDDS!!!”

so the old lady offers for them to stay the night bc its getting late

dipper is SUPER sus but he plays it cool surprisingly

mabel is So In!

long short...stan eventually saves them from darlene’s trap

usually shes just a maneater but look

when u live in the woods u do what u can

so stan hauls them back to their cottage

dipper knew there was weird shit out there but he wants MORE

he starts going through his great-uncle’s journals (*cue the dipper squee*)

he reads about bill and his deal w paz’s parents

he’s like....’maybe we should rescue her?’

ford wont tell him why they cant

so dipper and mabel sneak out

they steal the grunkles’ boat

mabel falls over board???

dipper tries like HELL to save her

but then he sees mermando save her

SO MABEL IS SAVED BY MERMANDO!!!

gideon (who had long-loved mabel from afar) finds out

he visits the merman to trick him

all mabel remembers is his voice

so YES mermando trades his voice for legs just like the movie

sue me okay w his distinct accent it makes sense!!!

so the twins get sidetracked bc mermando shows up out of nowhere

they dock on a small island for a pit stop and thats when ‘kiss the girl’ happens

they dont kiss so they move on

they dock on another stretch of land the next day

AND GIDEON APPEARS

the twins have only heard about him from their grunkles so mabel hears his voice and goes *heart eyes*

mermando is Distressed

dipper is Focused on getting to this sleeping princess

mabel makes fun of him for liking her

SO GIDEON HAS MERMANDOS VOICE!

at one point dipper catches him w/o the amulet that makes him sound like mermando

and he tells mabel and its kinda like “the hand that rocks the mabel” or whatever the ep was called

it takes dipper and mermando being threatened (and gideons voice slipping) for her to catch on and she breaks up w him

dipper wants to throw him overboard

they just leave him on the next inhabited island they find

mermando got his kiss but decides to go back to the ocean anyway

he promises to write

mabel is Sad

SO BACK TO OUR REGULARLY SCHEDULED ADVENTURE!

the twins come across a land near the one paz is on and decide to stop for food and to stretch their legs and other hygiene things

they find out there’s some archery thing going on and mabel is like ’ooooh can we try?!’

turns out its for neighboring kingdoms’ princes to win a princess

mabel and dipper think this is RIDICULOUS so they crash it

mabel steps up to shoot and everyone’s like ‘wHO THE FUCK ARE YOU?’

then dipper steps up beside her. neither of them have shot a bow before

they shoot at the same time. mabel’s like thisclose to the bullseye. dippers too far right

THEN!!! PRINCESS WENDY COMES OUT OF NOWHERE

DIPPER AND MABEL ARE IN AWE OF THIS VALKYRIE. THEYRE BOTH READY FOR HER TO KILL THEM BC THEY THINK ITLL BE AWESOME

but wendy is like ‘ACTUALLY ILL SHOOT FOR MYSELF THANKS’ and splits like three arrows down the middle w her accuracy

she looks at mabel and dipper and is like ‘u dudes look fun! ive never seen u before who are u???’

and they’re like ‘WELL!’ and launch into detail about their adventure w overlapping voices and sound affects and VAST description

anyways. i cant decide how old people are rn okay

so wendy is like “hey dad??? im going on an adventure w these guys!” and her dad is like “unusual but u DID just win ur own hand. so ill allow it”

“YES! can i take soos too?!”

“sure!”

sO THEYRE OFF AGAIN!!! lemme tell u the ship is filling faST!!!

they get to paz’s land. and the first thing they find is a girl in a tower with long purple hair.

everyone is pretty much just making ‘wtf’ faces for like....ten minutes.

finally wendy calls up the tower like “YO! WHATS W ALL THE HAIR?!”

tambry leans out the window w a bored expression and goes “its mine. im tambry. who r u?”

they introduce themselves and are like “u wanna come on our adventure?”

then....ROBBIE APPEARS!

and he knows where the princess is!!!

”oh yeah. her. shes also in a tower. its got a door but its guarded by gnomes.”

then robbie climbs tambrys hair pecks her cheek and ducks in the tower

they decide to head for the tower robbie directed them to. but they have to pass the castle. Northwest Castle

robbie warned them about the northwests. said that the princess was one and before she disappeared she was the snottiest brat hed ever met

so they became friends despite the fact that he plays music for a living (and not very well either)

her parents told her of the spell when she was twelve

so robbie’s like “they are not nice people and neither was she??? most of the townsfolk are glad shes asleep tbh”

but dammit! dipper came here for an adventure!!! he wasnt going to stop just bc the princess wasnt what he expected!

so they continue on!

mabel is like “maybe she doesnt KNOW how to be nice!”

and soos is just excited to be there!

and wendy is just...u kno...chill

they start to get close to the castle and they feel like they’re being watched

and then soos notices the PEACOCKS!

they assume theyre spies for the king and queen. which is half true?

they can also warn bill if someone is near pacifica

oh damn imagine that

being stuck asleep w a DREAM DEMON in ur head

sorry for the accidental psychological torture paz

WHICH IS THE ONLY TORTURE SHES HAD!

i think to make up for risking her life as a baby ther parents were like “we’re just gonna spoil u rotten and PRETEND u do no wrong eVERYTHING IS FINE”

so dipper is reading the journal and he FINALLY gets to the true loves kiss part of the deal

and he looks around at the party like “oh shit true love what do we do???”

mabel suggests he at least try and everyone agrees that yeah okay thats the back up plan

but dipper wants to use a SPELL!!!

so the king and queen see him w the journal and remember ford having the same one

so everyone is brought to the king and queen

theyre like “pRINCESS GWENDOLYN?!”

bc this is MY STORY and if i wanna give wendy a more princess-y name thEN I WILL

i say as i continue to refer to mason as DIPPER!!!

SO THEYRE MEETING THE NORTHWESTS!!!

wendys like “yes that is me the princess” and then everyone else introduces themselves...w dipper introducing himself as mason bc it just sounds more fairytale-y

soos is jesus (hey zeus! not jee sus)

soos is like....wendys bff/personal servant but mostly bff

so they explain their adventure to the northwests as quickly as possible

preston is no patient man and he’s is like “tbh its probably important she be here for her 18th bday soooo??? as long as she wakes up by next year why not???”

but only bc dipper was like “i wANNA USE MAGIC I DONT WANNA KISS HER THATS PLAN B!!!”

plus u kno...even if he DOES whats the guarantee itll work???

the guarantee is me being a filthy shipper tHATS WHAT!!!

so they continue to the tower!

there is probably a sidequest thingy with giffany bc i liked that episode

also soos needs more screentime im sorry

SO THEN!!! FINALLY!!!! THEY MAKE IT TO THE TOWER!!!

WHICH IS!!!

IN FACT!!!

GUARDED

GNOMES!]

also theres a manotaur/multi-bear sidequest i just thought of bc i like THAT episode!!!

is this gf, a fairytale, sk.yrim, or a d.n.d campaign now??? WHO KNOWS!!! ITS NOT ME!!!

SO THEY GOTTA GET PAST THE GNOMES!

first they offer safe passage in exchange for mabel as their queen

after thats declined theyre like “or the redhead. well take her!”

this is also declined

finally jeff tells them to attack

at first the party tries to fight them off and they do okay

uNTIL SOME GNOME WEAPONIZED SCHMEBULOCKS RAINBOW PUKE!!! (i think it’s toxic tbh but i dONT REMEMBER)

finally mabel just pulls out her trusty crosSbow (aka “GRAPPLING HOOK!”) and they just make a tightrope to the window above the door

wendy goes first and NAILS it

then everyone else follows

soos almost falls and gets left to the gnomes but everyone helps him balance and they all make it through the window

coincidentally. the window leads to the princess’s room

OH MAN WHY DIDNT I USE THE PTERODACTYL?!

oh well. anyways.

everyone is looking around the room and like...taking it all in

dipper takes a moment...then walks over to the princess

he isnt sure if waking her will also wake the demon

crossover even more w my old paciphera au??? idk probably not

so dipper tries the spells he narrowed it down to

none of them work

all his friends have returned to the princess’s room and mabel is like “u gotta kiss her brobro!”

so dipper...poor poor dipper...just leans forward and kisses her

paz pretty much snaps her eyes open when dipper is a half inch from her face while he’s pulling back

and even tho she was forewarned she wasnt expecting DIPPER so she SCREAMS

dippers ears are ringing

she shuts her eyes and stills her breathing and sits up.

AND SEES EVERYONE ELSE AND SCREAMS AGAIN

“i dIDNT EXPECT U TO BRING *FRIENDS*!”

so once shes a little more calm they explain the whole adventure to her

paz feels a little honored they came all this way just for her

also since True Love beats everything bill is like.....back in his home dimension. also paz has been fighting him for like....over a year.

so paz is like....ready to Go. u kno. just wants to go HOME.

they get pazs shit together and exit the tower through the door

she says goodbye to the gnomes. all by name.

“oh yeah mom and dad made them my personal guard when i was like...eight. theyve been prepping for this my whole life. they’ll meet me back at the castle.” so then she starts telling them about herself and her last like

two years of being asleep w a DREAM DEMON

“sometimes i got the weirdest nightmares??? and they never ended. but when i woke up i couldnt remember anything specific.”

she and dipper talk away from the group. he tells her about how hes her true love and everything “okay well. we’ll have to lie to my parents and say it was a spell. bc they will NOT approve of us being true loves and if they hurt you...”

“then they hurt *you* too!” dipper finishes (idk maybe a combo w a soulmate au thing?)

meanwhile mabel is like...whining about boy problems??? and wendy is like “this is y boys r dumb.”

soos is like...wandering off. I WANNA INCORPORATE MELODY BUT WHO SHOULD SHE BE?!

paz and dipper start like....arguing about how to deal w her parents

apparently they actually ARENT that nice. if she doesnt marry a prince they’ll give her over to bill completely...or something idk

SO theyre nearing the castle!!!

theyve written theyre grunkles okay no worries. also mermando.

thats y mabels complaing about boys.

mermando and that manatee wife of his!!!

paz is not exactly ready to face her parents so she convinces the party (roll for charisma) to go the long way

which is actually just circles

anyways

we run back in to melody and soos and the party is like ‘wHOOPS WE DIDNT EVEN NOTICE GLAD U DIDNT GET EATEN BY A SPIDER LADY!

maybe melody is like....a fairy???

something light and ‘childish’ bc thatd fit her personality

soos is like “ive BEEN here. u dudes have been going in circles.” and everyone glares at paz.

“im sorry!!! i just dont want to go back!!!”

“ur dad made us promise to have u back for ur 18th bday.” says dipper while he tries to stay mad at his future wife

paz is like “YEAH SO HE CAN MARRY ME OFF TO A PRINCE!!!”

idk why paz and dips are being better at being soulmates here okay i was like....sleep-drunk when i first wrote this

so the party has a choice to make.

take paz back home where she wont be able to be w her TL (which in some cases has probably led to death) OR!!!

sneak her out and take her home w them?!

wendys probably gotta go back to her own kingdom tho.

and soos wants to stay w melody

U KNOW WHAT I JUST REALIZED?!

sTAN NEVER GOT TO BE SOOS’S DAD!!!!

SORRY SOOS!!!

so anyways

mabel and dipper decide to help her sneak out

luckily she knows all the blindspots

it takes longer but they finally make it back to their ship

they say theyre goodbyes to soos and melody and paz wishes them well in her kingdom. she promises to return when shes ready to rule

they load the ship and sail to wendys kingdom next

they stay a few days to recuperate

paz has trouble sleeping bc when she does the nightmares come back.

cue a kat.niss/pee.ta thing where paz sleeps next to dips bc it keeps the nightmares away

wendy has to explain why soos isnt w them to her dad who kinda shrugs it off?

“u proved u can protect urself.” or something.

after like.....a whole fucking year the twins are heading home.

paz and dipper sleep together on the ship too bc its just fucking easier

paz is nervous to meet the grunks

she and dipper arent exactly....dating??? its def more like soulmate au

where theyre AWARE theyre supposed to be together but they dont even rly know if they WANT to be together.

paz is p much “i dont rly wanna be w anyone else. ill let u kno if that changes.” and dips is like “tbh same.”

mabel is already planning a big royal wedding.

iDK Y BUT I WANT THEM TO FIND OUT THEYVE BEEN ROYALTY ALL THIS TIME??? probably just bc i LOVE that trope!!! but theyre not so its whateves.

so they FINALLY get home. mabel has been writing letters this whole time. to mermanso. to soos and melody. to wendy.

shes the captain of the dip.ifica ship and shes gotta keep her crewmembers in the know!!!

the twins also wrote to the grunks the whole time so!!!! no worries!!!

paz tries writing to her parents...but she can never find the right words.

meeting the grunks isnt as bad as she thought???

stan loves her off the bat. partially bc shes rich and bc she doesnt take shit

ford is pleased to meet the girl he saved and shes v v thankful to him for saving her life as best he could.

it takes her like a YEAR to write the letter.

she promises her parents she’ll return. AFTER shes married.

at this point she and dipper ARE together. they figured all theyre confusion out and are just living the good life!

mabel and wendy are doing the long distance thing. shes still friends w mermando.

robbie and tambry found paz and they write back and forth.

u CAN TAKE ROBBIE AND PAZ SIBLINGS FROM MY DECOMPOSING HANDS!!!

everything is as happily ever after as it can get.

and then dipper proposes despite knowing what it means.

BUT THATS A WHOLE OTHER ADVENTURE!!!!

*end credits roll. an epic theme song starts playing*

#💎 OUT OF DIAMONDS. ╱ out.#[i did this forever ago anD I FINALLY MOVED IT TO AN ACTUAL POST OF IT'S OWN]#[im planning on writing this tbh but if u got some rp ideas hum <<]

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duskywraith · 4 years

Text

Unleashing the Beast

This is a written up tale of a friend’s recent DnD Experience. (Campaign Note: Due to a large amount of players, their party has split up to split the players amongst separate sessions – Currently a “stealth” group and a “non-stealth” group.)

Friend: ...yeah also last week was insane.

Me: Oh yeah?

F: Yeah, so, we have to get to the Drow city.

Our team is team stealth we've been split in two groups, and our only healers, technically, are me and a Drow cleric. We’re about half-way through our journey and we come across a 300ft cave with a lake inside… and an aboleth swimming inside it. It begins to talk to us telepathically and tells us we either capture the leader of the gnomes down the path to the right or we sacrifice one of us for freedom to pass, so, after much deliberation…

M: You...considered the sacrifice? 😂😂

F: …We choose to get the gnome's leader much to the disgruntlement of the gnome and past gnome in the party, we turn around to leave and get confronted by 14 intellect devourers. So, we kill them, but our cleric got beaten and we had to put the helm of intellect on her because she got d u m b. We take a rest, and off we go. We're ready, we're sorta preparing a plan, the Cleric casts pass without trace on the group and we begin our way into the deep gnome mining village.

M: Sounds pretty solid so far

I can’t imagine anything going wrong here

F: Our stealth isn’t the best in general you know with a hulking barbarian in the party, so the pass without trace defo helped. We make it through without quarrel and we hear:

“Mithril! Go take it to Krazak??”(not sure about the name can’t remember).

So, we follow the gnome into a large cavern and we are confronted by a large pile of gold and ores and shiny things huuuge in the cavern of this mountain, and upon it, a fucking black dragon!

M: Oooooh no 😂 doesnt bode well

F: Realising that this is the leader we supposedly need to capture we're like:

“o f u c”

You know how I mentioned stealth?

M: For sure, for sure

F: Yeah, we we're all perfectly hidden and fine… apart from the fucking gnome, who walks straight in and the dragon is like: “huh… a gnome from above ground, whomst this?”

The gnome’s like: “o god o fuck”

So, this big fat fucking dragon gets right up in the face of the gnome and is like: “What are you doing here?!”

Gnome: “We're just trying to pass through, we got lost”

Deception check…

Failed.

Dragon: “Don’t humour me, I’m not stupid. Tell me why you’re here or I’ll straight up eat you!”

So, the gnome tells the dragon about the aboleth in the pond and how it wanted the leader of the gnomes.

Wisdom check

Result: 4 of us are now scared simply because of the aura of his dragon

and he’s like “Ah there’s more…”

M: 😂😂 Go oooon

F: The dragon then tells us: “Well see, I was brought here as a young dragon with my mother, to be protected, but the entrance was collapsed in… As I grew, I simply couldn’t get back out.”

Gnome suddenly says: “We can get you out of here!”

We're all like “Oh no”

Dragon is instantly interested, he hasn’t seen the sky in hundreds of years.

Dragon essentially says: “If you can get me out of here I won’t eat you”

It turns out the cleric can cast polymorph, so she says: “I can polymorph you into something smaller but we ask one thing of you…you kill the aboleth for us.”

The dragon really wants out of here so he’s like: “fine I’ll do it”

So she polymorphs him into a spider, puts him on his shoulder and the gnome the we followed guides us out.

We head back to the aboleths chamber, and we tell it: “We have brought you the leader of the gnomes”. The Cleric lets the spider walk forward enough and ends the polymorph.

Boom. Fat black dragon.

The aboleth is suddenly like trying to mind control this dragon (which it is way too smart for).

The dragon just laughs. It picks the aboleth up by the tail and essentially whacks it against every conceivable surface in the cavern before tossing it aside.

M: Power moves in this house 😂😂

F: the aboleth flops dead, obv

M: obvs

F: The dragon is like: “Take me above ground, NOW!”

We're like: “oh god oh fuck how we doing this?”

The gnome can teleport… but the child sorcerer decides to tell the dragon that the quickest way above ground is through the territory of the mind flayers… which is the way we are going… to a Drow city......

u n d e r g r o u n d .

The dragon believes her and starts stomping through the mind flayer territory killing them left right and centre. We just stop and realise what she’s done and we're thinking: “We need to stop that dragon because we are going in the same fucking direction… to not over ground”

M: Why tf would they even try fuck the dragon around? 😂😂

F: The gnome explains that if we can convince the dragon to come back, we can teleport it above ground if we have an item and a description of a place it has been, so she instantly runs after the dragon to convince it, leaving us 1 irl minute to decide what and where it’s going. One party member suggests my bow because we got it from a volcano in a timey wimey temple but I’m like “no thats fucking stupid the teleporter goes with the dragon” so I say “my boot was on the ship right?, the ship I met the group on?”

DM says yes

Meanwhile, while all this was happening, one of the mind flayers had come over and asked us why we had released a dragon in their territory. We explain, so they ask if we can get rid of it, offering safe passage through their territory in return (More incentive to do what we were already doing)

M: 😂 Oddly civil of them

F: So, she starts walking back with this dragon and I had over my boot the dragon says the girl is coming too. At this point the gnome, the sorcerer and the dragon are planning to go to the ship that I forgot got blown up and ripped apart. They take the boot and then *poof*.

M: oh god 😂

F: The DM starts to describe the trio poofing to the dock of Ashelok (which is the city that is still rebuilding from the red dragon we defeated there and the literal meteors that the green man bombed it with because he wanted these shards we we're collecting off us).

It was at this point that I realised…

I’ve just helped re-enslave an entire city to a black dragon. A city that we helped liberate from it’s previous Red Dragon ruler… that *we* saved them from.

Big heckin’ mistake

M: Maybe.....maybe he was a nicer dragon 😂😂

F: Well…

The black dragon instantly demands the towns wealth be transferred to him and announces himself leader of the town. The gnome and the sorcerer with him get put up in the best rooms in the tavern per the dragon's request.

The mind flayer that greeted us offers us some tea, which obviously I try and so does the barbarian. It's delicious! That is until I later find out its brain juice and I stop drinking it.

M: 😂😂😂 Fucking hell, what a night

F: The mind flayer shows us their city and their big brain, we learn a little about their culture and how they’re actually quite civilised. They put us up for the night in a minimalist inn where we use a strange tube we acquired earlier to send notes and small things to the other group. I write the following note to them (Irl so the DM can hand them it):

‘We fucked up. I’m sorry, we may have caused a problem that we may have to fix later!

– love, team stealth '

M: Lovely message, very foreboding.

I'm....very surprised the Mind Flayer didn’t kill you given that you were the cause of the whole dragon issue 😂

F: only because we stopped more of them from being killed

M: You still got a tonne killed in the first place though 😂😂

F: As the morn comes and they’re able to teleport back to us again, the Mind Flayers give us a timer to leave before our truce ends. We say “Fair enough, we shall leave, thank you for having us, goodbye”

Then we end the session back at the meeting place and to the other two teleporting back with my boot.

Worst thing is we can’t tell the other group… they’re gonna receive the note when their part of the campaign commences

M: 😂😂 When you meet back up, they'll have about 80 theories as to what you've done

F: Yepp XD

M: Damn… All that just because a grumpy fish wouldn’t let you pass

F: A big grumpy fish with telepathic powers

M: This is the kinda shit you gotta put on tumblr, so I can later pin it to my DnD Pinterest boards *(Then I did it anyway because I’m impatient lul)*

F: ikr XD

#D&D #DnD #dnd campaign #dnd homebrew #Dnd Story #D&D story #Dragon #Black Dragon #Cave #Aboleth #Fucked it #Fucked up #Heck #Mind Flayers

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davidcarner · 6 years

Text

Season 3, Bartowskified Ch 3, TM vs TPS, Part II

A/N: Me: They can't want this, they can't want this. Reads the reviews…okay….The Carner Way …..*deep breath* Are we ready? I give you Chapter 3, Team Moron vs The Pink Slip, Part II

A/N 2: A few fics are going on fall *hiatus* check my profile as to which ones and why. Trust me, it's gonna be epic when you find out why. Just give me some time.

Disclaimer: I don't own Chuck, and if Sarah told me to run I'd run, not fast or far, but run.

He leaned towards her, and paused. "Sarah," he said softly.

"Chuck," she replied just as softly. "It's okay." He leaned towards her, his lips inches from hers…

"Okay you two, let's go, we gotta get all of the surveillance equipment out of here before Ellie and Devon get back." Casey was standing in the doorway of the bedroom grinning. Sarah was glaring at Casey.

"I should kill you."

"If you do, you won't be able to mix your chocolate with Bartowski's peanut butter." Sarah lifted an eyebrow, confused. "Paperwork." She rolled her eyes, but he was right. Lots of paperwork over killing a fellow agent. It had taken Casey weeks when he thought he had killed Bryce.

Chuck was trying to process everything. "Why am I the peanut butter?"

Casey thought for a second and then shrugged. "No idea. Come on, let's get to it." Chuck started to get up, when Sarah grabbed him, pulled him back down to the bed and kissed him. It wasn't a long kiss, but it was one of promise, one of hang on, and one that said this was real. So. Very. Real. "Enough you two, we have to debug the apartment and be at the Double O by 0800."

"How long can that take, there aren't that many bugs are there." Sarah looked away, and Casey had an amused look on his face.

"Sorry, Chuck, following orders," Sarah said softly.

Chuck's eyes grew wide as he turned toward Casey, who had an amused grin on his face. He slumped forward, his hands covering his face. "I don't suppose there's any way I could build a jammer?" His head suddenly made a slight jerk and files ran through his mind. It felt smoother in some ways than previous flashes, but at the same time it gave him a slight headache, like a brain freeze from drinking something cold too fast.

"Chuck?" Sarah said softly. "Did you just flash?"

"Yeah."

-ooooo-

"So, it's working?" Casey had put the debugging on hold with this new information. They immediately went to Castle to call in and report to the general. Beckman was a little surprised by the news. "He just flashed on how to build a surveillance jammer by thinking about it?"

"It's a little more complicated than that, General." Casey smirked at Sarah trying to be professional. She gave him a glare and turned back to Beckman. "Chuck found out that there were many bugs in his house, and wanted some, uh, privacy."

Casey's lips twitched. "General, Agent Walker here is being modest." Chuck turned toward Casey wondering who this was. He was being…nice, friendly, like he was trying to sell someone a Beastmaster. "Bartowski wanted some private time with Agent Walker to do…well, whatever it is two young people in love want to do." Beckman raised an eyebrow. "It's obvious now that these two have to use the Mr. And Mrs. Bartowski cover."

Chuck's eyebrows shot up. "Don't you mean Carmichael?"

Casey shrugged. "No." Sarah swallowed and bit her bottom lip.

"We aren't doing this," the strained voice came from beside them. They both turned to stare at Chuck. "General, whatever Sarah and I do are whatever Sarah and I do, I will not allow you to use it for some cover."

"AGENT Bartowski you will."

"Okay," he said, arms crossed like a petulant child. "Then just put me in a bunker."

Beckman sighed, and rolled her eyes. "Chuck, cut the crap."

Chuck's eyes widened in surprise. "Chuck, Ma'am?"

"Someone told me dealing with you is not like dealing with any other spy, and they're right." Beckman glanced at Sarah. "Sarah, will you protect him? I'm not asking you as Agent Walker."

Sarah glanced at Chuck. "If I have to," she said with a grin and giving him a shoulder bump. He gave her a grateful smile.

"Christ, he's already ruined a perfectly good spy."

Beckman glared at Casey. He quickly straightened up. "Major Casey, you know full well, he's changed both of you." Beckman sat back. "This cannot go on like any other normal operation, as much as it pains me to say. What will make this work?"

Sarah spun on Chuck before he could speak. "Trust me?" He grinned and nodded. She turned back toward Beckman. "If you want a fully functioning Intersect, he can't lie to his family." Beckman slumped, but nodded. "Blood or otherwise."

"Not the gnome," Casey whined. Chuck grinned.

"Also, we will move in together, for protection, and there will be no monitoring of what we do." The look on Sarah's face said that was non-negotiable. Beckman nodded. "And you can't ever threaten to split us up, because you'll lose the Intersect."

"Agreed." Everyone's eyes widened at how quickly Beckman agreed to everything. "However." Chuck slumped. "Until I know you have some ability to protect yourself, you, Mr. Bartowski are going to live in Castle until your new apartment is ready across from sister and brother-in-law. It is for your protection, nothing more." Chuck nodded. "If Agent Walker wishes to stay with you during that time, that is her business." She took her glasses off. "Chuck, this is about protecting you. You have the biggest weapon to stop the Ring, and we need you."

"Why do I feel a but is coming, or the other shoe, or a big ole other shoe?" Casey looked at Chuck, who shrugged. "This is exactly where in a TV show some crazy drama would be introduced."

Beckman swallowed. "You're correct, this is the bad news. There will be a Ring expert, a special agent who will join your team, he will lead this squad. However, I have assured him, if he does anything out of line, Casey or Sarah can shoot him." She was silent for a second.

"Bryce?" Chuck heard himself ask. Beckman barely nodded her head. "Bryce Larkin is going to lead this team?" Beckman nodded again. "Bryce Larkin is still alive?" Sarah squeezed Chuck's hand.

Casey looked disgusted. "Chuck me."

-ooooo-

Sarah stretched, rolled her neck, got up, and went to find her….what was he? Her Chuck, that's what he was, and that's what he always would be. She had a pretty good idea where he was. She headed to the holding area and found him, in the cell that Casey had locked them in after Barstow. Why was this so hard? It had been easy with Bryce, easy with other guys, but with Chuck….and there was the answer. Not that it was Chuck, but because with them it was….nothing…..only physical, and with Chuck, it was everything. It was more than she could have ever hope for. She could say, without one shadow of a doubt that the relationship, and that's what it was, she had with him, was more fulfilling, more special, and just more than any other man she had ever known.

"You still considering two beds instead of one?" He chuckled, never looking up. She sat down beside him, reached over, and took his hand. "Talk to me." She laughed. "Who though I'd be the one in this relationship saying that?"

"You know I ….care about you, right?" He wasn't looking at her, but she nodded anyway. She squeezed his hand. He turned toward her, tears in his eyes. "It is SO hard for me, dealing with Bryce. And I don't want him dead but… Sarah, it's not you, it's my….brokenness, it's my…"

"Chuck Bartowski, let me stop you right there." Chuck stopped mid-word, afraid to speak. "Part of it is me. I don't talk, I don't assure you verbally, and you need that, and that is something, I've been taught not to do, from a very young age."

"Your dad?" She nodded. "Am I…am I enough for you? Before you yell, hear me out." She sighed and made herself not roll her eyes. "You've had the opportunity to do amazing things with amazing people-"

"It's nice you finally got some self-confidence," she cut in with a smirk. Chuck was confused. She cupped his face with her hands. "You. You are amazing people. Chuck, I..care about you more than I have ever cared about a man in my life." She took a deep breath. "Chuck you mean more to me then you could ever know. I would go to the ends of the earth for you."

"I get it, Sarah, I really do, but we're being forced together, and a small part of me, that my dad messed with when he was here…" he looked away.

She nodded, it made absolute sense why he would feel that way. "Okay, then from this point forward Mr. Walker," he turned toward her, eyes wide. "I, Mrs. Bartowski will do everything I can to tell you how I feel. And you, Mr. Walker, will do everything you can to show me how you feel."

"Sarah, I'm scared, not of you, but of us, what if this thing in my mind doesn't work?"

She leaned in and kissed him gently. "Chuck…" She trailed off, unable to say the words.

He couldn't help but grin. "Not so easy to say what's in your heart is it, Mrs. Walker."

Her eyes flashed. "Chuck I fell for you a long time ago, somewhere between you fixing my phone and saying ballerinas were tall. I'm tall, Chuck, I could have been a ballerina." She was beginning to get emotional as she talked, and louder.

"You'd of been a great ballerina," he sputtered out.

"You're damn right I would have." She paused. Looked away and then straight into his eyes. "I love you." Chuck's mouth about dropped to the floor. "I love you, Chuck Bartowski, and I need you to trust me. I am here for you. I am going to figure out how to do this and we are going to be together."

"Sarah," he began, but he grinned. "I'm Mr. Walker, right?" She grinned and nodded. "Then there's only one thing I can do." Her grin grew as he moved in to kiss her.

"Keep it in your pants, you two!" Casey yelled, walking by.

"I really hate him," Chuck groused. He looked over at her. "Permission to be Chuck Bartowski instead of Mr. Walker?"

"I kinda always pictured Mr. Walker not being any different than Chuck Bartowski."

"So this is just a way to force yourself to verbalize things?" She bounced a shoulder as he chuckled. "I love you, Sarah." She looked at him through her lashes.

"We need our own place."

"One bedroom still an option?"

She bounced her head around like she was thinking. "What if we do get a two, but we share one?"

"I like the way you think," he said, leaning in to kiss her. It was short and when pulled back he saw some regret in her eyes. "Did I do something?"

"No," she said quickly shaking her head. "But I have some bad news, I have to go take care of stuff and you have to stay here." Chuck dropped his head, and she patted his leg. "I'm going to go oversee the modifications I want in the apartment. IF you promise to wear your watch, you can meet me at the train station over by that restaurant that serves the czech food you like so much. You can drive yourself in the morning."

"Oooo, are we sneaking away from all of this?"

"Chuck, we're going for a run." His head dropped.

"I still don't think this will work, but I trust you." She squeezed his arm and lay her chin on his shoulder. "You know I hate running, right?"

She grinned. "I can be very persuasive." He shivered a little, making her grin bloom into a smile. "After the run, we'll talk and figure things out, okay?" He nodded. She stood. "I love you, Chuck."

"I love you."

She grinned at him. "Tomorrow we'll have our own place." He nodded. "You will help me decorate, right?"

"How do you feel about sheik nerd?"

"I love it." She bent down, kissed him, and left. Chuck remained sitting on the bed, wondering if this would really work.

"You know you may be a bigger moron than I thought." Chuck looked up at Casey. He was leaning against the door frame, arms crossed, and was studying Chuck. "You have your chance with her."

"Casey, it feels forced."

Casey quit leaning on the door-frame, stood up straight, and uncrossed his arms. He walked up to Chuck. Chuck quickly stood, thinking he didn't want Casey towering over him if he yelled. "Numbnuts, did you think this would be easy? She has been running from everything her entire life. She may not be running towards you, but she is moving towards you. No one has ever gotten her even to stand still before, but somehow YOU managed to get through to her. You aren't being forced, well, much. But everything isn't against you now. You two have got to get your head out of your asses, because if you screw this up I will hurt you."

"You've never said this many words to me in three months time before."

"You were too busy feeling sorry for yourself to listen."

"Casey, why? I get why keep the team together, but why are you trying to help Sarah and I?"

Casey studied him. "Because you got dealt a crap hand for two years, and for the most part, you did the best you could with it. Hell, Bartowski, you two deserve each other."

"Thank you."

Casey nodded. "Don't sleep naked, I still have cameras on you."

"Why would I sleep naked?"

Casey turned and walked away. "Because you're hoping Walker shows up."

"You're a romantic."

"Don't I know it."

A/N: Still in "episode 1." They already said I love you. I mean I warned you all. I really, really did. (You all are just as bad as me aren't you?) Til next time…hope you enjoyed it!

#Season 3 #Bartowskified #Chuck #Sarah #Charah #fanfic #fanfiction

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blah-blah-stranger-things · 6 years

Text

The Monk (Chapter 1/2)

The Party plays D&D at the cabin, and the damn place is too small for Hopper not to overhear.

My first Stranger Things fic. Hope you enjoy! ao3 link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14260926/chapters/32891049

Chapter 2

"Ok, nerds, prepare to be awestruck. This is what, 7d6 fire damage, one per level, plus - "

"First of all it's per caster level, you're multiclass. Second of all the spell is capped at 5d6, so even if - "

"That's such bullshit! So your girlfriend gets to incinerate everything in the room and I'm stuck taking potshots?"

"It's not bullshit, Mayfield, it's the rules. You're the one who insisted I help you pick out an ability set for a Zoomer, and that meant multiclassing. Lucas, a little help here?"

"Hell no. I'm recusing myself."

"Smart move, Stalker."

"Pah. Your glorious red mane is clouding his judgment. It's always better to min-max."

"...what the hell does it mean to min?"

"No - min-max. Not you, the word max. As in 'maximum.'"

"A min-max lecture coming from the bard..."

"Oooh, burn from Will the Wise!"

"7d6 fire damage?"

Hopper rubs his temples. The boys all laugh in response to El's quip, a helpful reminder as to why he's allowing all this in the first place. Socialization. It's good for her. If it's not safe for her to wander around town yet, at least she can enjoy herself with friends now and then. It's nice, he reminds himself. Worth a few hours of wanting to stab his eardrums through with a pen.

With anything, really, but the pen's handiest, and likely more effective than rolling up one of the case files in front of him and making a play for deafness-by-papercut. Callahan's handwriting is hard enough to parse without a litany of nerdspeak assaulting him from behind. Somehow this Dungeons & Dragons shit is even worse than the stereotypes had led him to believe. Jesus - when he was Wheeler's age he was fixated on a very different pair of Ds, that's for sure. Granted the thought of him thinking of El that way...

Hopper rubs his temples again.

Ok - the file. Thief only took items from the Valentine's display, so definitely a crime of opportunity. But in Callahan's interview notes from the -

"Woo, sneak attack! Multiclass that, asshole!"

"The guard goes down with a sickening groan. But when you move away you open yourself to an attack of opportunity from - "

Focus, Jim.

...right. Shopkeep said it happened after the doors were locked, and there was no sign that any of the locks had been tampered with, which suggests an inside -

"INSOLENT FOOLS! FACE THE WRATH OF ARIYBAR THE PROFANE! SOON, YOUR FLESH WILL ADORN MY HALLS AND YOUR ENTRAILS El stop looking at me like that, this is supposed to be, like, intimidating."

"Sorry. You're adorable."

Four dramatic groans.

- an inside job. Or else, uhh... what was he thinking about again? Right - or else the shopkeep is a dope or a liar. He skims the list of employees. Let's see - Carmichael, Hayes, Daniels... wasn't it somebody by the name of Daniels he locked up overnight just last week for -

"Pew pew! Pew pew!"

"Dustin that's not what Magic Missile sounds like."

"It could be."

"That's lasers. It's anachronistic."

"Oh so you're saying they didn't have sound effects in medieval times?"

"Anyway, while the bard and ranger are distracted by this fascinating conversation, Will you manage to get past the gnome to the door. Inside is a short hallway with a door at the end and a passageway off to - "

Hopper grinds his teeth. Ok. Maybe better to save the critical thinking for later. There's got to be some good old-fashioned paperwork around here somewhere. God knows Flo spends enough of her time berating him about it. He lights a cigarette, shuffles papers until lines requiring his signature manifest. Time off request for Powell - fine. Signed. Office supplies requests... let's see. Coffee's an office supply, right? Eh better safe than sorry. Oh, and he brought home all that extra tape for El around Christmas, after the, uh, mishap with the first round of present-wrapping. Is he out of staples? Not that he ever staples things, but they're fun to flick into the garbage can on slow days. Could probably use -

"Oh shit guys that's gotta be where the princess is. I have dibs when she decides to throw herself into the comforting arms of her rescuer."

"Dustin you're a halfling. If she throws herself into your arms you'll both fall over.

"Screw you."

"You open the door and there she is, golden hair shimmering in the sunlight pouring through the fortress window. Her room is tiny, with only a bed and a small wash basin, but even if it were enormous your eyes would be drawn straight to her. She's as beautiful as the rumors said, and though she looks nervous at first she soon greets you with a grateful smile."

Hopper closes his eyes and his forehead twitches. Office supplies. Think about office supplies.

"Fear not, m'lady! Your heroes have arrived to see you safely back to - "

"So, like, is this it? Campaign done? I know we get a reward back in town, but I kind of figured this Profane guy would have a treasure trove or something. He had that whole side business with the cursed amulets, he must have earned - "

"Hey, Zoomer, shut it. You're killing the mood."

"'Actually,' the princess interrupts, 'he did mention something to one of his lieutenants about a store room behind the bookcase in his study...'"

"Now we're talking. Lead the way, blondie."

Envelopes. Probably need some of those. Hopper snuffs out his cigarette in an ashtray.

"Cure light wounds, anybody?"

"Me please."

"Coming right up... 13 HP for the mage."

"Thanks Will."

"And I'll dispel the bookcase too, in case it's booby-trapped. Lucas, can you check for - "

"Already on it. Ohhhh, natural 20 ladies and gentlemen. Hold your applause, please."

"You make a mockery of the variety of traps both magical and mundane that guard what you soon confirm is a chamber filled with gold coins - more than you can possibly carry. They sparkle in the light from Dustin's glowing lute."

"I wink at the princess."

"Jeez Dustin."

"What? I didn't do the growl, that's called character development."

"Fine. She smiles shyly back at you, smoothing the folds of her elegant silver-patterned dress. Meanwhile - "

Hopper's hands slam down on the tabletop before he can stop them. "Ok," he says, with a tone so measured he considers it downright admirable, "that's it." He pushes himself up out of his chair and turns to see six startled faces looking up at him from the living room floor.

"...uh... what's it, exactly? Sir?" Dustin asks after a moment. "I wasn't going to... I mean - uh - I know there was some real sexual chemistry building there between me and the princess but we don't typically roleplay the... I'm going to maybe stop talking now anyway how's the paperwork going? Going good I bet, I bet you aced every page, sir, bet you really showed it who runs that office oh god I didn't stop did I."

Hopper blinks. "What - no. No, that's not what I - Jesus." He rubs his forehead. "I just have to say - this story makes no sense."

Four pairs of eyes glance nervously at Mike. El looks at Hopper, taken aback. "Dad!"

Wheeler himself narrows his eyes, and Hopper sees hints of the anger that exploded that night last October. "Excuse me?"

Hopper raises his hands defensively and addresses his daughter. "I'm just being honest. Friends don't lie, right? Look think of this as a learning opportunity," he says, turning his head back to Wheeler, "a chance to get better, right?"

Mike crosses his arms. "What, exactly, doesn't make sense about it?" he challenges in the way only angsty teenage boys can.

Hopper sighs. He really should just leave it.

He doesn't. "First of all, this whole fortress arrangement. The brilliant villain puts a half-dozen guards in his great hall but has nobody actually watching the princess's room? Not to mention his piles of gold? I mean speaking of gold - what is this guy's motive, anyway? Clearly he's a hoarder or something since this room is filled with cash but Jesus, if he's interested in padding his retirement fund why the hell didn't he try to ransom the girl back to her rich prick of a father? And the amulet side gig, for god's sake, if you're trying to make a mint selling trinkets why make them suck people's life force? That's not exactly a great long-term business strategy, when every product you sell screams 'I'm an evil asshole.'"

Lucas and Dustin share a mildly disturbed look. "...how much attention has he paying this whole time?" Lucas mutters.

Hopper ignores them. "And the princess - you said at the start the only reason she was out in the field instead of in her guarded ivory tower or whatever was because she was badly claustrophobic. You expect me to believe she's been kept in that, quote, 'tiny' room for a week and yet a few seconds after you open the door she's smiling and offering to show you around and playing footsie with the hobbit over there?"

"Actually, sir, technically I'm a halfling; Hobbits are specific to Tolkien's universe whereas halfling is a more generic - "

"I don't care," Hopper replies emphatically. "And I was going to just let it go, whatever, it's just a game and you're just a kid and bound to make a few mistakes now and then, except then you talked about her dress, and that was a step too far. The elegant silver embroidery shining in the light from mini-Dylan's glow-in-the-dark axe."

"Yeah, it's not technically glow-in-the-dark, it's imbued with a Light spell, which takes is luminescence from - " Will elbows Dustin and the boy stops talking.

Will's a good kid.

"One of the key pieces of evidence," Hopper resumes, circling around the back of Wheeler's little board set-up like he does with perps in the interrogation room, "that pointed your little band of misfits to Eeriebear's fortress - "

"Ariybar," Dustin mumbles.

" - to the ogre's fortress, was - "

"Actually he's a gnome."

Hopper's hand slowly fists and he offers a smile as he feels a vein throb in his neck. "Thank you, Dustin." He returns his gaze to the back of Wheeler's head, who's still sitting with crossed arms and hunched shoulders. "Now if I recall, that bit of evidence was a sizeable piece of torn cloth, covered in mud, found caught on a broken fence post in back of one of these amulet shops. Isn't that right," he asks the witnesses. Uh - other players.

El is glaring daggers at him, but Max nods cautiously. "Yeah, that's right."

"And why was that a clue?" he asks, crossing his arms, too. "Anybody?"

"...because it was from the princess's dress," Will answers shyly after a moment.

"It was. Now, it's just barely possible that your Dungeon Leader failed to mention - yes, fine, Dungeon Master, and if you interrupt me one more time Henderson you're never going to find out what it's like to get through puberty - that Wheeler just failed to mention that there was a giant tear in the princess's dress, though you'd think it'd be a detail the halfling horndog here would've been interested in. Or maybe there's just so much material on medieval dresses that nobody'd notice if a little went missing, what do I know. But! What'd you have to do to figure out it was part of her dress?"

"It has a unique pattern," Lucas replies.

"Right. But you couldn't see that, at first."

"No - we... had to wash it."

"And what exactly did the Dungeon Master say when you washed it?"

El's eyes flash for a moment, and she glances guiltily at Mike before answering slowly, "That... the embroidery wouldn't return to its original shiny color no matter how much we scrubbed it."

"No matter," Hopper says, pacing back around to Mike's front, "how much," he punctuates, "you scrubbed it. So what happened? Did the villain go to all the trouble of creating a new dress exactly matching the pattern of the old one? Did the dress somehow only get dirty exactly where it tore? You were only a few hours behind the villain at that point, and it hadn't rained since the day the princess was kidnapped, so there's no way the scrap got muddy after it was torn.

"It makes no sense," he concludes.

He takes a deep breath, smirking triumphantly.

...God, he's an asshole.

The realization comes as soon as he stops talking. Jesus. The kids are just trying to have a fun time, and here he is critiquing Wheeler like he's a suspect. The two are hardly best buds, but they've settled into a comfortable detente after their confrontation the night El closed the gate, and at the end of the day Hopper's fond of him, is consistently impressed by Mike's patience and generosity when it comes to El and her idiosyncrasies. God knows El's crazy about him; Hopper's certainly not winning any points with her, spouting off like this.

He scratches the side of his nose - as close to embarrassed as he ever lets himself look these days - and after a moment works up the willpower to turn to apologize.

But instead of the angry or hurt or humiliated look he expects to see on Mike's face, there's a half-smile there instead. An appraising smile. A devious smile.

"Suddenly, the light reflected from the coins grows more intense, and for a moment you're all blinded, a sound like the chime of a high-pitched bell ringing in your ears. Roll Will saves."

It's a moment before anyone speaks. "...what?" Lucas says, finally.

"Roll Will saves."

Hopper, left hanging, feels a little lost, and looks at Will. But after a moment everyone, not just Will, is rolling one of those damn multi-sided dice, and reporting some numbers that hold no meaning for him.

"When the light fades, you find yourselves frozen in place. The coins have vanished; sinister circular runes line the chamber in their place. And where the princess stood moments before now stands Ariybar, cackling loudly.

"'You fools! You really thought a great Illusionist like myself would choose to confront you in a contest of brute force?'"

"Fuck me," Dustin says, dragging his hands down his cheeks.

"Hey," Hopper warns, glancing at El. He knows it's almost certainly futile to try and safeguard her vocabulary at this point, but he's at least going to pretend to qualify as good adult supervision. Granted, the way El is staring at Mike with a proud smile on her face, Hopper isn't sure she even heard.

"What the hell is going on?" Max demands.

Wheeler shifts his attention to her. "'Ahh, yes. Where are my manners. Welcome to my ritual chamber. I've spent years perfectly attuning it to the outer planes in anticipation of this day.'"

Lucas tightens his hands into fists. "What happens today?"

"'Today, I finally bring my master home from exile. Today, he will take his place as the rightful king of this wayward nation.'"

"You don't mean - " Will begins.

"'Oh, I do. Today, the Tyrant returns.'"

Everybody gasps as though this means something. Hopper just looks bemused.

"'Through the amulets, I've gathered enough vessels to activate the ritual. Once I begin, everyone who has come into direct contact with one of the cursed tokens will become subservient to the Chosen One - the Tyrant's secret offspring. Then it's simply a matter of channeling their life force here in this chamber, and my master will walk the earth once more.'"

"Wait - wait wait. The Tyrant was a human, you're a gnome. You can't be his offspring... right?" Lucas makes a face.

"'Oh, no. Not I. I spent many years trying to discover his offspring's identity. Imagine my surprise when I learned she herself was unaware of her parentage,'" Mike says, turning his attention to Max.

Max looks at him blankly, before her eyes widen. "Wait - me? But I'm... my character's an orphan. My father died in a - "

"'In a fire, yes. Not entirely untrue; when the Tyrant was banished, a great fire swept across the capital.' Max, you feel a strange tingling in your spine, like some kind of dark energy is running up and down your body."

"I draw my bow," Lucas says with a scowl.

"Can't move."

"She won't help you," El says, her voice certain but her eyes shooting Max a questioning glance. "Um, duh," Max confirms. "My dad sounds like a real asshole. I'm not channeling anything."

"'As I expected. Reports of the Zoomer's exploits suggested someone with views that diverged significantly from her father's. No matter. I'll simply Dominate you after the ritual begins.'"

"Excuse me?" Hopper interjects.

"What? - oh, god, no," Mike says, blushing, "it's a - it's a spell."

"Though hypothetically with the control it gives you it'd be possible to use it for stuff like - " Will elbows Dustin again. (Good kid. Jesus.)

"Where is the princess?" Will demands, surprisingly forcefully.

"Uh - right. 'Her? She's insignificant. I needed a way to get the Zoomer here, to the chamber. When I heard she had fallen in with the king's favorite errand boys, it was simply a matter of contriving a circumstance that would cause the king to send them my way. The princess is currently resting comfortably at a farm not far from here. After the Tyrant returns I see no reason not to release her.'"

"We won't let you get away with this," El says, her eyes narrowed. For a moment Hopper's afraid he'll need to make a run for the tissues, but nothing falls over of its own accord or flies across the room.

"Ariybar cackles as the glyphs along the wall turn a sickly green. 'There's nothing you can do to stop me. You're trapped, and I have everything I need to complete the ritual. You should feel privileged, to witness the dawn of a new era!'"

Will grips his knees tightly. "What can we do? Can we move?"

"Nothing but your mouths."

"Does anyone have any spells prepared that don't have somatic components?"

El shakes her head.

"Stupid goddamn multiclassing," Max mutters.

"Uh... Feather Fall?" Dustin offers, presumably unhelpfully given the unenthused responses from the others.

"Well. This is it. We're finally, truly doomed," Lucas says, leaning back with resignation.

Max grunts. "This sucks. It's unfair! It's an impossible situation."

Wheeler gives a half-smirk. "Well... maybe there's one way you might be able to pull through."

Will leans forward. "What is it?"

"Well... there was someone who figured out Ariybar's ploy. So it's probably safe to say he didn't get caught."

Dustin frowns. "Who? We're all..."

Hopper scratches his chin. All the kids are accounted for. Was there some other ally they mentioned he's forgetting about? That weird carriage driver with the beard? No, he was killed by that jello cube thing. (Jesus, this game is weird.) Seems kind of lazy to let one of Wheeler's characters solve the problem at the eleventh hour, anyway. Who could...

It's at this point he realizes they're all staring at him.

"Uh - what's up?" he asks, afraid he already knows the answer.

"He doesn't even have a character sheet," Lucas points out.

"We can use some default stats," Wheeler says, pulling open one of those massive rule books.

"Uh - kids, I have a lot of work to do - uh - for instance there's case files, and... ordering, uh, staples..."

"Please Dad?" El asks, eyes wide. "You're our only hope."

She doesn't always call him Dad - it's something they're both still getting used to - and he's very aware it's no accident she's using it now, which only makes it more irritating that he already knows it's going to work.

"Fuck me," he says under his breath.

"That's the spirit, sir," Dustin says as Hopper drags one of the kitchen chairs out into the living room.

#mike wheeler #eleven #jane hopper #jim hopper #will byers #dustin henderson #lucas sinclair #max mayfield #mileven #stranger things #fanfic #fanfiction #lumax

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strawbebbynya · 7 years

Text

Moments

AO3 | FF.net | Patreon

Captain Davenport/Merle Highchurch for @littleneonlimelight

The first moment they have together is on the beach.

Sure, Merle and Davenport have had moments alone together, but not moments, moments so quiet that they almost forgot the other was there. Moments where they are the only two people in the world, no matter how true or false that may be. It starts off simple enough, two older men watching the waves in complete silence. Davenport has never seen Merle so at peace outside of tending to his garden on ship, singing to his plants-- hell, he may even be happier here, on the beach, than with his plants

Davenport, however, is not at peace; not on the inside. Inside, he is fighting a losing battle with himself, searching for a way to tell Merle that, for a decade now, he has been completely, absolutely, head-over-heels in love for the cleric

His hands were trembling with the thought of being held, dwarfed completely by Merle’s own (the thought of the pun gets a nervous laugh out of him, and Merle chuckles too, though at what, Davenport isn't sure.) As the sun began to set, Davenport’s trembling worsens and his courage continuously wanes. That’s when it happens.

Without a word, Merle takes Davenport’s hand in his, fingers intertwined, and squeezed gently.

The captain’s heart almost explodes. His face and ears were bright red, brighter than the robes of their uniforms, and, oh no, is he hyperventilating? Calm yourself, damn it! You’re the captain of the Starblaster, not some village boy with a crush!

And yet, neither of them let go for long after the sun sets, until they’ve fallen asleep on the beach and woken up by their crew calling after them.

They don’t talk about it for a long time. But Davenport knows he’s not seeing things when he catches Merle’s eyes and sees them twinkle mischievously

The second moment takes place on the Starblaster.

They lost Lup, Taako, and Magnus halfway through the year, and things had been hard the four of them left, Barry most of all. He rarely left the libraries of this world, bringing back tomes to the Starblaster to pour over their contents in the solitude of his quarters when it was too dangerous to stay planetside. Lucretia was Lucretia, never the one to be very social anyways. That left only Merle and Davenport.

The memory of their night on the beach, as completely and absolutely innocent as it was, felt sinful to Davenport. He’d had male lovers before, done things that even now he felt too ashamed to think about, but just holding the cleric’s hand had felt like he was crossing the line. This was his coworker, his crewmate, his employee. He should be keeping his distance. So why had he jumped on the first chance to help Merle with his plants?

Mostly, he’s just standing a few feet from Merle, watching nervously as he sang and tended his plants. Merle collected seeds from every world they visited, taking care to replicate their biomes almost perfectly and writing down notes whenever he found something he considered interesting. Though Merle didn’t seem to notice, Davenport certainly took note of how the plants would lean towards them, petals opened a little wider, and follow him as he walked away, almost drooping as he left.

I know the feeling, Davenport thought.

“Hey, Captain?” Merle called as he spritzed the cacti with water. “Come over here, I wanna show you something.”

The gnome almost tripped over himself scrambling to the other man’s side. “Yes, Merle?”

In front of them was a small, wilted cactus in a pot, its petals drooping lazily. “I’m… not always going to be around, Captain. And someone needs to be here, to take care of the garden. Now, it’s not much, but this lil’ guy… he needs a special touch. He need some time on his own, before he can join his brothers. I’ve got too many plants to take care of, but… I was wondering if you wouldn’t mind taking care of it for me.”

Davenport swallowed the lump in his throat and took the pot, scrutinizing it. He remembered seeing others like it about two cycles ago; Merle had received it as a gift, for helping the locals set up a greenhouse to help their crops during the long, harsh winters. It was certainly much better looking when they had first gotten it, that was for sure.

“What… how exactly do I…”

Merle tore out a page from his notebook and handed it Davenport, then moved through the room, gathering the items that he would need to care for it. “It likes being told secrets and sung sea shanties at least once a week, but the more you tell it, the better. You’ll have to give it five spritzes of water every day and change the soil once a month. It won’t grow too big, and you can use its petals for tea.”

Davenport was then shooed back to his room with instructions on where to put it to maximize growth and happiness, along with a lot of jargon he couldn’t make heads or tails of. When he was alone, he stroked a finger along a little petal and smiled.

Maybe sharing secrets with this thing wouldn’t be so bad.

The third moment happens after the parley.

Watching Merle’s smokey form suddenly dissipate had taken a toll on everyone, but it had felt like a stab through the heart for Davenport to see it. When he had seen Merle reappear on the Starblaster, he had wanted to just run up to him and hug him, or punch him in the face-- or both! But he had refrained, thanking Merle for what he had done.

The second time, however, felt far worse.

With no one left to care for them, Merle’s plants were bound to wilt. Davenport had only experience with the small plant the cleric had given to him (and it had blossomed beautifully with his dirty secrets), but he had decided to take it upon himself to care for the plants. He was the one closest to Merle’s room, after all. It wasn’t because he wanted to feel closer to the man.

At first, Davenport couldn’t make heads or tails of the gibberish instructions that had been left behind. They were written in a mixture of dwarven and common slang, forcing the captain to get Lucretia’s help in translating, but even then it was just as nonsensical. Every plant had its own way of being cared for, and, if the instructions weren’t followed to a T, they would wilt, smack him, or both.

The captain pleaded with them to give him a chance-- he wasn’t Merle, but Merle would be back soon, they just need to hold on a little longer.

They didn’t listen, of course. But that didn’t phase him.

Slowly but surely, Lucretia and Davenport began to make sense of Merle’s writings, and the flowers began to bloom again. The day that Merle returns, Davenport makes it a point to show his work. Merle checks over every single one, his smile growing wider with each plant.

“Well I’ll be damned, they must really like you!” said Merle. “They look wonderful!”

Davenport’s ears turned red. “Well, it wasn’t just me, Lucret--”

Merle grabbed Davenport by the cheeks and kissed him square on the cheeks with a resounding smack. Davenport let out a surprised noise, staring wide-eyed at the other man as he pulled away. “Merle…?”

The cleric grinned and pat his bright red cheeks. “Just think of it as a thank you, oh captain, my captain.”

The fourth time takes place in bed.

Merle was a heavy sleeper, and a loud one at that. But, as Davenport had found, he couldn’t quite sleep without it. It was almost like white noise, he’d once told the others when they asked him how he could stand it.

Tonight, however, neither man was sleeping. Merle had invited the captain to partake in some new tea, which they had discovered a little too late to make them more awake than tired. They spent half the night drinking tea in Merle’s quarter, sitting in his bed and talking. Then, the cleric’s hand, slowly, almost fearfully, rested on top of his. Davenport almost dropped his teacup in surprise, meeting Merle’s uncertain gaze.

“Captain, I’ve… been thinking--”

Davenport snorted at the thought of what the twins would’ve said to that, then covered it up with a cough.

“We’ve spent a lot of time together, and we’ve gotten… close. Or, at least, I’d like to think we have. And, seeing Lup and Barry, it made me realize, I… oh Pan, how do I say this without making a damn fool of myself? Captain, I like you. I like you a lot, and I don’t know if you feel the same way, but I just had to get it off my chest.”

Davenport gaped at Merle so long his mouth began to dry out. Merle must have taken his silence for rejection, as he began to babble out an apology and pull his hand away. When the captain took his hand, however, he immediately clammed up.

“I like you too, Merle,” Davenport muttered, unable to look him in the eye.

They were both silent for a moment, until Merle started laughing. Caught up in the sheer ridiculousness of their situation, Davenport joined, leaning against the cleric’s shoulder. Their laughter died down and they turned to each other, Merle with a mischievous glint in his eye.

They spent their night doing far more than sleeping.

The fifth moment is their last moment.

They are playing a card game of their own making; the turns take at minimum five minutes to complete, often longer with how they fill the silence with words. Merle is holding Davenport’s hand across the table, stroking the back of his hand with his thumb. They have been completely silent for some time now, when Davenport’s head shoots up.

“Holy shit… I think it's my birthday,” he says in bewilderment. “I, I guess we got to start… I guess we gotta start caring about stuff like that again..”

Merle looks up at him. “What are you, like, 130, 140?”

He laughs nervously. “Yeah, I don’t know, do we count those years? I- I certainly didn’t age during that- Jesus, Merle! We’re going to get older now!”

Merle hums, a small, sad smile on his face. He doesn’t tell him that he’s happy to grow old with Davenport.

There’s a pause before Davenport speaks again. “Do you- do you think we’ll be able to have normal lives after this? Nobody’s ever had a life like ours, there’s no...rule book. I don’t even know where to begin.”

“Why would you want a normal life? Normal lives… suck!”

Davenport laughs, squeezing Merle’s hand.

“Like, this game, we play this game, we just sit here. It’s just a way to kill time! C’mon, Skipper, you don’t want to just kill time all the time!”

“I know, I just-- How do you wanna live, Merle? Like, I don’t have a-- this mission has been my life for a century. I don’t know what I want to do.”

“You wanna know what I’d like to do? I’d like to move to the beach. You know why? Because with the ocean, the scenery is always changin’, and I want the scenery to always be changin��, man. I don’t wanna be lookin’ at the same thing all the time… I wanna see a million, billion shells… I wanna watch rain come sweepin’ in… That’s, that’s the life, right there! Change it up, man! Keep it interesting!”

As Merle speaks, something is happening to Davenport. He drops his cards, sweat beading on his forehead. He blinks rapidly, barely registering what the other man is saying. He’s.... forgetting. He’s trying to remember their moments together on the… on the beach? No, no, it was a… a bed? There was definitely a flower involved right?

He’s forgetting, forgetting, he doesn’t want to forget--

He forgets.

#davenchurch #highport #the adventure zone #merle highchurch #captain davenport #my writing #my stuff

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pafsins2 · 7 years

Text

Everything RIGHT with Across the 2nd Dimension

I said I’d do a few win posts on here sometimes even though I am moving on. Well, it’s now the 6th Anniversary of the movie so why not win that? Yep, we’re winning a movie. Now I’m Cinema Wins!

Hopefully this time the formatting won’t suck. So let’s go!

1.This is a nice use In Media Rise that does a good job of making us wonder what the heck is doing on.

2.Goozim!

3.”In Fablous 2D” Nice!

4.This opening is excellent. For one, the song itself is highly enjoyable with style.

5.But mostly, the visuals do a good job of showing their connection with Perry to set up the story and we even have a minor invention for newcomers.

6.So that’s how Phineas puts his shirt on!

7.Ferb singing ftw!

8.Nice flashback showing how they got Perry.

9.Funny fake out with Barthemlow.

10.Jeremy’s College Crazy Dad.

11.Now we set up Candace’s plot with her wanting to grow up. We’ll get more it as we go on.

12.Platypus Badminton looks fine.

13.”Who’s Annetee” Heh.

14.More good set up with Phineas lamenting that Perry vanishes everyday.

15.Love the flashback with the return of Carl as a Sassy Black woman.

16.The set up here is a bit more on the nice but it’s good regardless.

17.Monogram getting mesmerized by own Hologram is funny.

18.Smart idea for Candace to try to bust them herself.

19.Norm is always a win.

20.While Mysterious Force was cut, I’m winning it anyway because it’s that good.

21.”Ferb, looks we’re gonna hit that building that looks vaguely like your head” Nice.

22.And the boys have meet Doofenshmirtz This is beyond amazing.

23.Great small bit with Doof not knowing what his friends call him.

24.This gag with Monogram is funny even if it makes no sense.

25.Wow, a funny piss joke!

26.Nice Couch Gag. …Now that kind of Couch Gag.

27.Love the look of Doofville as I will call it.

28.The ditty by the gnomes is funny.

29.I always love Doof songs and this is up there. We get 2 Doof’s for the price of one!

30.I won’t win every joke here but I love “Vending machines become the dominant race”

31.Love the visual references.

32.Love the music pausing too.

33.And I also love the Llamas joke.

34.And I REALLY love Coming at you Fridays!

35.The very concept of Platyborg is disturbing and awesome.

36.Love Phineas getting mad at Platyborg here.

37.And here’s the moment where Perry reveals he’s a secret agent, and in badass way I might add.

38.While his anger does get overblown at parts, it’s totally understandable.

39.I DON’T WANT YOUR PAMPLET

40.Love the Normbots

41.”Jinx, you owe me a soda” That reminds me of Kim Possible and that’s a good thing. (Heck, they did in their own DCOM)

42.”Get me, I’m a George o Keef painting” I don’t even get this joke but I love.

43.I wanna know about Ferb’s double life.

44.As angry as he is,. I like that he’s smart enough to set it aside for now to focus on their goal of getting home.

45.”Alright Mr Eviler than Thou” Nice

46.Love the cutaway gag here

47.I know I say “I love” a lot but I LOVE Doof 2’s hilariously simple backstory.

48.VICTORY GUM

49.Existential trading cards is the best joke in the whole movie

50.Like some of the little details like how Lawrence gets on the thingy and of course, Doofoply.

51.D’aww at Phineas-2 hugging Perry and being worried about their Perry

52.And we come to the most popular song, which is pretty damn good. Upbeat and really nice.

53.Love the theme song reference

54.This part seems to divide people and while it’s not perfectly done, it is a good dilema with Perry having to turn himself in which Phineas thinks is him ditching them

55.And of course the sad Olivia Olson song helps make it better.

56.”Well you can but it’d just be platyp” Nice.

57.Buford 2’s gimmick is funny.

58.And the situation gets more interesting with Doof-2 needing the boys.

59.You gotta love Isabella-2.

60.I like Baljeet-2 and how jerk-y smart he is without Phineas there to be smarter than him.

62.BEST SONG EVER

63.I dig the Parsnips Callback.

64.And I really really LOVE Candace-2. So much.

65.Even if they think Perry has problems, they still seem as family and want to rescue him.

66.They even give up a chance to go home to do so!

67.”Why is Isabella suddenly fashionable” OH SNAP

68.This scene with Candace and Candace 2 is my favorite. We great insight into both characters with How Candace-2 had to grow up too fast.thanks to Doof-2’s reign. It feeds into her arc really really well.

69.”You make growing up sound like it’s a bad thing” “It is what it is” true.

70.The whole trap thing is cliche but hey, it works here.

71.Nice way to include the Monogram showering thing.

72.Awesome action scene is awesome

73.Bufdace ftw

74.Candace-2 doing this might have been …bad, but I get why she does it and it’s good set up for an awesome moment later.

75.Stacy doing this to save Candace is really nice.

76.Defiant Phineas is the best

77.Love the puppet

78.Doof being by a puppet is amazing.

79.And now we return to the opening with a great lampshade.

80.More great action

81.”It’s muffin time sir” “You’re broken!”

82.Candace-2 saves the day in a super badass way!

83.Everything about this scene is tense and enjoyable and cutting off the Goozm with the portal is just awesome.

84.And we get my favorite song in the film proper. It’s really catchy the visuals are full of great moments.

85.Especially love the Zebra and the floating baby head world

86.I find it interesting how robots set off the citizens of Danville. We also get good gags in this bit.

87.MY WATERMELON

88.I like the gag with Doof’s neighbor person.

89.Awesome Jeremy moment is awesome.

90.And cute moment is cute.

91.And of course, it’s awesome how Phineas and Ferb-2 help her and their arc gets resolved.

92.BUFORD -2 GOT HIS NACHO’S, YES!

93.Small nice moment with Stacy

94.Now here’s a great pay off, with it turning out Perry had a plan this whole time, and how he re-created their big ideas.

95.This part of the inventions being shown off is great.

96.Even the other agents get a moment to shine.

97.Phineas to the rescue!

Hey big idea show off from before? Eat THIS! (+5)

103.This song sequence is FANTASTIC. Besides an awesome song on it’s own-

104.But The fighting is awesome with tons of great moments and jokes

105.AND it has a good place in the plot with the inventions being there because of Perry,. This is a great pay off to everything the film was leading up to!

106.“Your sister is a fridge but you know her light is always on” Oh my.

107.The extended version gets a win FOR RIP OUT YOUR CUP AND SHOW IT TO YA STILL PROCESSIN’

108.Hey,a piss joke that was important for later!

109.This battle with Platyborg is cool

110.”The girl is about to forgive the guy for the cliche misunderstanding” Okay, 2nd best joke.

111.I’ve failed to mention how awesome Doof-2 is. He is, moving on.

112.Awesome platyborg defeat

113.Awesome Doof-2 defeat (for the moment)

114.Awesome Irving Moment! (Bet you thought no one would ever say that)

115.I love how Candace uses the powers of the mysterious force to her advantage here.

116.I also like the anti climax of the train just fixing all this.

117.”Self Destruct button!” “Oh you”

118.Awesome Monogram-2 moment.

119.Cute payoff with Candace-2 here.

120.”I’ll give myself a little more time to be young. It’s not such a bad place to be” Nice.

121.Platyborg is back to normal!

122.And now Phineas finally gets why Perry had to hide his secret. This is a nice moment.

123.”We’ve had a lot of great days, but we only have one Perry” That sums it all up. D’aww

124.I’m with Monogram on “sweating through my eyes” at this. It more than makes up for some small flaws this plot has.

125.Okay, this Phinebella kiss is kinda great on how they on purpose threw this on knowing Phineas would just forget about it anyway. It’s a great troll moment.

126.Also Buford’s face is just amazing.

They easily could have ended it here. But instead we have this, where Perry saves his memories of the day, showing that while some may have forgotten, it still did happen. Thus making up for the whole Staus oqu thing. Awesome (+2)

129.This song is quick and fun.

130.And for the TV/Netflix version, we have freaking SLASH for an amazing credits song!

131.Love how Doof-2 knows rhymes for Evil.

132. And one final win for how good the movie is in general.

MOVIE WIN TALLY: 132

REWARD: Nacho’s

I don’t know how this compares to other win posts but it’s gotta be up there. But yeah, this was plenty of fun. There’s one other win posts I wanna do this month but you’ll have to wait to see what it is.

Until then, bye.

#wins #Phineas and Ferb #Cinema Sins

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strawbebbynya · 7 years

Text

The first moment they have together is on the beach.

Without a word, Merle takes Davenport’s hand in his, fingers intertwined, and squeezed gently.

And yet, neither of them let go for long after the sun sets, until they’ve fallen asleep on the beach and woken up by their crew calling after them.

They don’t talk about it for a long time. But Davenport knows he’s not seeing things when he catches Merle’s eyes and sees them twinkle mischievously

The second moment takes place on the Starblaster.

I know the feeling, Davenport thought.

“Hey, Captain?” Merle called as he spritzed the cacti with water. “Come over here, I wanna show you something.”

The gnome almost tripped over himself scrambling to the other man’s side. “Yes, Merle?”

“What… how exactly do I…”

Maybe sharing secrets with this thing wouldn’t be so bad.

The third moment happens after the parley.

The second time, however, felt far worse.

The captain pleaded with them to give him a chance-- he wasn’t Merle, but Merle would be back soon, they just need to hold on a little longer.

They didn’t listen, of course. But that didn’t phase him.

“Well I’ll be damned, they must really like you!” said Merle. “They look wonderful!”

Davenport’s ears turned red. “Well, it wasn’t just me, Lucret--”

The cleric grinned and pat his bright red cheeks. “Just think of it as a thank you, oh captain, my captain.”

The fourth time takes place in bed.

“Captain, I’ve… been thinking--”

Davenport snorted at the thought of what the twins would’ve said to that, then covered it up with a cough.

“I like you too, Merle,” Davenport muttered, unable to look him in the eye.

They spent their night doing far more than sleeping.

The fifth moment is their last moment.

“Holy shit… I think it's my birthday,” he says in bewilderment. “I, I guess we got to start… I guess we gotta start caring about stuff like that again..”

Merle looks up at him. “What are you, like, 130, 140?”

He laughs nervously. “Yeah, I don’t know, do we count those years? I- I certainly didn’t age during that- Jesus, Merle! We’re going to get older now!”

Merle hums, a small, sad smile on his face. He doesn’t tell him that he’s happy to grow old with Davenport.

“Why would you want a normal life? Normal lives… suck!”

Davenport laughs, squeezing Merle’s hand.

“Like, this game, we play this game, we just sit here. It’s just a way to kill time! C’mon, Skipper, you don’t want to just kill time all the time!”

“I know, I just-- How do you wanna live, Merle? Like, I don’t have a-- this mission has been my life for a century. I don’t know what I want to do.”

“You wanna know what I’d like to do? I’d like to move to the beach. You know why? Because with the ocean, the scenery is always changin’, and I want the scenery to always be changin’, man. I don’t wanna be lookin’ at the same thing all the time… I wanna see a million, billion shells… I wanna watch rain come sweepin’ in… That’s, that’s the life, right there! Change it up, man! Keep it interesting!”

He’s forgetting, forgetting, he doesn’t want to forget--

He forgets.

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