#yes i post a lot ! it's how i cope !

[captainofthetidesbreath]

absolutely spoken like someone whose career in piracy ended (possibly very recently) because his boatswain, lover, and partner in warlock shenanigans tried to ritually murder him after she identified his distrustful hesitation and disillusioned exhaustion and considered it weakness and cowardice

#Vandran has so many emotional problems. It's amazing. #Is he giving the best advice to Fjord? No. Do I see absolutely where he is coming from? Yes. Is this actually stuff Fjord needed? Also yes. #It gave Fjord new and exciting emotional problems but.... was Vandran wrong lmfao? #Fjord did very much want to learn and did greatly benefit from many of these things even as he had to unpack and unlearn parts of them. #He did very much benefit from being able to control whether and how other people saw him. #And while what Vandran taught him developed a struggle with vulnerability in Fjord—it did help Fjord a lot to learn to hold his guard. #It's a..... super complicated thing really. #It wasn't always good and Fjord did need to let go of parts of it. But it served Fjord at the time in a way he desperately needed. #(Like trying to stop someone from bleeding out and being less concerned about whether the wound will heal pretty. As long as it closes.) #(Aabria voice: Nature heals and sometimes it heals a little stupid but it does heal.) #As immensely flawed as these lessons were they enabled Fjord to find his footing and stability and build a foundational sense of himself. #That allowed him in turn to continue to grow in a way that let him let go of these things as well. Like outgrowing your coping mechanisms. #And I feel like this comic underscores and articulates all of that very clearly. Stepping stones. #Anyway this post is about Vandran who also has massive emotional issues bc yanno his girlfriend tried to murder him for ~weakness~ #Critical Role things #MNO spoilers

[boxwinebaddie]

hi uncle nina! how is your new job going?

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA THIS IS SO SWEET!!!!!!! ;-;;; <3333

when i tell you my ENTIRE FACE lit up!!! this is so kind!!!! PLEASE!!!

and it is...Going...thank you for asking. Well? i hope! ( oof sdhksdh )

my first couple of days were Rough, but i am settling in...Slowly!

tldr: wht i do is in the ~realm~ of Teaching, which is my Favorite thing to do on planet earth but it's also...very Stressful and Exhausting.

( i am very tired all the time...*tweek vc* send coffee, please )

but i'm having a blast! i'm breaking out my craziest miss frizzle outfits, my griddy got a 9/10, i'm creating very chaotic cahoots, only had to break up one major fight ( it was over a boy smh ) & no one!!! has thrown a stapler at me yet!!!! ( which happened 2 me student teaching last year, rip ) so u know!!! alls well!!! everyday is a new day!!!

so basically if i ever talk to you guys and it seems like i am lecturing or checking up on you...it's because it's what i do, haha. it's not on purpose, i swear, it's just on autopilot...i also worry abt you guys. <33

it's also why my fics aren't updated and my asks are coming out way less; i'm just really overworked and underpaid and exhausted doing the hardest and most wonderful job in the world, i'm afraid! :'((( </3

hopefully, however, i'll find a balance, reassess my relationship with writing ( which, per the pinned post, explains in an inarticulate way that i have been struggling w/ writing bc of my imposter syndrome ) and be able to go back to writing/answering my asks more often bc!!! i literally love my asks lmao i love answering them and i want to write just in a healthy and not stressful way!!! which!!! soon!!! i hope!!

like omg i still think abt pep n rm everyday, i want to write one shots for the uncle nina tbfw universe / talk thru the weird ncu tsot thing!

but we will get there! until then, thank you for being curious abt me! this was so wonderful to recieve after my very long and stressful couple of days and i was a little worried that i was never going to get an ask message again, so this was very special to me! TYSM AAAAA!!

you're my angel and as always, my darling, from all that hurts you...

i hope you heal,

( teacher ) uncle nina <3

#THIS WAS SO CUTE WAAAAAAAAAAH #YOU GUYS AWWWWWWW #this was so sweet oml #my week has been so hard #a tiny girl did stop me and say Wow You Look Like A Princess #TO MEEEEEEEEEEE #WHICCCCHHHH AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH #I ALMOST STARTED CRYING ENJOY HEAVEN MY LOVE #me and the tiny little people..im luv them sm #but yes please know im doing chaotic teacher gorlie things #and wearing my crazy clothes and causing mayhew and grading and being exahusted and crying and dying #and thats why ur fav fics arent upHated / my asks arent done #also bc having that much attention was not dealt with well by me and im tyring to figure out healthy coping mechanisms #and how to write in a less stressful way #BUT YES #THANK YOU FOR ASKING #ITS A LOT BUT IM HAPPY IM JUST VERY VERY TIRED #me and post covid kyle: menaces and also mentors #the office calling me bc a kids parent showed up and me being like Any Last Words shdlkshdks im going 2 jail #BUT IF YOU SENT ME AN ASK I SEE IT AND IM RESPONDING ASAP I PROMISE!!! also if u have any more qs pls send them #i love them and all of you <333

[mooodyblue]

okay, i've definitely spammed enough tonight lol. i'll start working on the lil celebration blurbs and other requests tomorrow 🫶🏼 thank y'all for the love today, truly appreciate it !!! always love talking to y'all ❤️‍🩹

#feeling a lil insecure tonight but i think i just need to sleep #gotta remind myself ppl follow me for a reason and if people don't like what i post or write then they would follow me in the first place!! #yes i post a lot ! it's how i cope ! #anyway lemme shut up and get some sleeeeeep #lily.txt

[ezraphobicsoup]

my leitmotif plays but i’m mean and evil now specifically in the night time. call that a darkmotif

#yes i know that’s not how words work i also don’t care #i was doing some thinking and i think i should be more mean and evil to some extent it would benefit me #by that i mean like make a point of prioritising myself above other people and not keeping talking to shit people #wacky i know #also thinking about leitmotifs because persona really does have a lot of them huh #ezra likes music #sorta #i mean i do but this isn’t fully a music post #in other news hm i had a nice sandwich for lunch :) i have been having a nice day to spite the Horrors #it’s very warm which is less pleasant but i am coping for now #should prolly sleep earlier tonight but that’s tonight but now is not then #thanks for reading have a great whatever you’re doing right now :)

[latinokaeya-moving]

kaeya was a little traumatised kid who probably came from a community that dealt w their collective trauma in a predictably grim way as well which is why i think when he was taken in by crepus he absolutely had the energy of strange quirky little girl for who it’ll become painfully obvious later was nd/traumatised and didn’t understand social conventions and what is developmentally normal/appropriate for them to know but for the moment is Definitely brushed off as “haha don’t worry abt him, he’s just a little quiet and odd for now bc hes in a new n strange environment!”

#x #gi posting #i think it’s time to accept i project more of my personal experiences onto kaeya than i wanted to originally admit #BUT LIKE I THINK IT MAKES SENSE #especially w all the instances where as an adult where he’s been accused of reacting in a way that comes off as cold or rude or inappropriat #(eg when he’s in battle or when crepus died and he was said to have smiled/laughed) #it makes SENSE that his sense of this stuff would be a little skewed/off. that maybe he’s a little more ruthless than the pampered kids his #age he meets in mondstadt or that he has a gallows humour style of coping w uncomfortable topics #also i’ve been vaguely learning a lot abt developmentally appropriate behaviour for kids #recently and one of them was abt them testing out the waters of what they’re allowed to do vs not #and that’s why u see them sometimes do things you know are wrong/that might Seem malicious or bad but it’s just them like. becoming aware of #the world they’re interacting with and learning stuff like what natural consequences are and also especially how their guardians will react #and like obviously this is all for significantly younger kids/toddlers and i don’t think kaeya was taken in that young by crepus #but i’m applying the same principal in that he’s in a new environment and probably was involved several ‘accidents’ or random things over th #years where it was just him poking and pushing and tearing boundaries of what he would be allowed #and sometimes if he was caught n it was something possibly mean/cruel it was never so much for the sake of that. just that he #wanted to Test and see what happened #GAUGH am i making sense i’m always so jumbled when i write things out when in my head i’m like YES. genius #😭😭😭

[velocitic]

something on my mind lately that i'm not sure entirely how to phrase is like - this is mostly targeted at white trans influencer types, but i find something very grating on the kind of body negativity posting i see in relation to dealing with body dysmorphia. now, body dysmorphia/dysphoria are something that anyone can experience, and not everyone does, and it's different for different people. however, i take issue with the content made around learning how to "pass" by hiding your body, and specifically the language used for it. primarily i see this around "wide hips", and i do see the need and/or want for clothing tips that help people feel comfortable in their bodies, and i don't think there is anything intrinsically wrong with this content's primary goal. however, as trans owned/focused fashion brands are becoming more in number, i'm finding that the representatives i am seeing for these brands are overwhelmingly white, skinny, transmasc individuals. and the language used to market their products is one that is, i think, meant to be addressing dysphoria, but it comes across to me as a narrowly defined negative view. as someone with a larger chest and a larger/stockier frame, all of the tips about "hiding" my wider hips can do nothing tangible for my appearance. you cannot hide genuinely large/noticeable features of your body; trust me, i've tried for years to do so, and sometimes i still try in vain to wear the straight jeans and the special cut tee shirts, and it just leaves me feeling worse because i am not the target audience of these tips. i am not skinny. i also do not think i subscribe to this belief that wide hips are a "dead giveaway" that will prevent you from passing; i think that (and other such beliefs) honestly is rooted in bioessentialist beliefs that i wish we would all unpack and be a lot better off without.

it is not to say that skinny trans people's issues with their bodies are not valid or not okay to talk about. but i do think that rebranding body negativity into the language of progressive thought is unfair and cruel whether it is shaving razor ads telling women that they are beautiful no matter what but that doesn't mean stop shaving, or if it is a skinny, flat chested, white trans person telling me that all trans people are wonderful but more importantly how much their wide hips bother them - and how a product can "fix" both of these issues.

and how am i meant to feel about this whole thing, anyway? if this skinny person's hips are too wide, then what the hell is wrong with me? there is inherent comparison in self hate. putting yourself down will only lead to holding bias against those who are "worse" than you (whether you're aware of it or not) & broadcasting to all the other people with the feature you hate about yourself are surely also ugly or inferior in the same way you believe yourself to be. i don't think body dysmorphia should not be talked about. i do think that talking about it in the language of product placement and brand marketing is doomed from the start. when a skinny person says that their hips are too wide, their jaw is too soft, they hate their nose and with a chest like theirs they'll never pass, i earnestly have no idea what to possibly say, because in their self hate they have entirely vilified me. i am short and stocky with muscle and my jaw is soft and i have acne and wide hips and a large chest. how am i meant to feel safe with those who believe my features to be their worst nightmare? how can i build community with you when i can imagine how you preen in the mirror over your 110 lb build and how awful it is?

this is what is meant when we talk about self love as a form of resistance. you cannot expect to be a safe person as long as you hate yourself for being human.

#and i think there's a lot to add here and a lot of caveats too #bc you're not like. a bad person bc of body image issues #i certainly have my fair share #but instead of focusing on fixing my problem (read: lose a shit ton of weight and become conventionally attractive) #i am choosing that i want to be a safe person that others can feel comfortable with. #and to do that i know i cannot be hypocritical in how i speak about myself #there are many ways of coping with and handling body image issues that do not involve Buying Products To Hide Your Body #one that helps me is that trying clothes on in the store made me breakdown #so i dont do that anymore #i get a good solid understanding of my size at home #and learn how to take the measurements and eyeball if something will fit me #and i go to stores and buy clothes based on that and i dont try them on #if they dont fit in my own room i can be a lot kinder to myself than if they dont fit at the mall #and i can return them or alter them or give them away #long post #body img// #ask to tag #just. could say so much more on this topic but ywah im fed up with it #love yourselves now this is not a request. at the very least stop allowing yourself to hate yourself #easier said than done yes yes but doable nonetheless #and i mean it about being safe for others. i do not like talking about my own struggles with skinny people bc i do not trust #them to be safe people that understand where i'm coming from. i wish it was not that way #but it is. and maybe it would be different if i was speaking to a skinny person that was body positive for themselves and others #and it is and has been. but often that is not the case

[justwanderingmuses]

You can truly tell that I'm rusty at tumblr in general, not even simply written rp, due to the fact that I queued things and did not think a moment about them until realising I had not, in fact, fixed the post schedule and so it all posted yesterday. lmao. Oops.

#eh well at least i'm WRITING again #man I have missed that. #also I'm in the process of re-re-re-replaying DA whole series in order #and I have absolutely got to finish Awakening so I can get back to DAII and hopefully tempt Fenris and/or Seb muse back #I've been painfully tempted to try my hand at writing Anders though which like. JW...... chill...... #and yes maybe replaying DA is my way of coping with not being able to afford BG3. so what if it is #also gotta finish MSQ in FFXIV because I'm about THIS close to gathering G'raha up as a muse #and/or Estinien #depending how the ffxiv muse thoughts go I might throw them all on one side multi though there's a lot of boys whom I love from that game #i guess i'm not SO out of practice on tumblr i'm still writing half the post in the tags

[un-pearable]

so. i spent the entire night before a Very Important Thing I Need To Study For. listening to every single vocal track the sonic franchise has ever produced. this was undoubtedly a bad decision. wish me luck

#hey i know how fuckin cool sonic rush is now though. that’s fun #and the original song that got replaced by I Am All Of Me #so uh. still a lose. but whatever #yes this was for the ninjago post. i have no justification this thing is audience: me but i want it to be GOOD damnit #text✨ #i’m good at coping with stress i promise <3 #also in the process of this i now have an au. for better or worse #i’m so mean to jay in this post i’m sorry. poor guy gets a lot of s6 stuff bc sonic has a lot of time travel songs

[jrwiyuri]

Dsmp can’t even have a good ending anymore at this point it’s just slow burning to the ending of a tragedy story

#sorry sorry #I’m doom posting I know #although like #this isn’t even rlly doom posting this I just like #yknow #how much truama can a character go through before it just becomes too much? #like . #yes ofc any person with trauma can absolutely be happy but like. the trauma is never going to fuckin go away #and when ur talking about the immense amount of truama that is presented in the d5mp it’s like.. that’s #a lot #and it’s not like any of these bitches have any form of healthy coping mechanisms or access to any therapy or professional help #yknow? #it’s not a huge tragedy that ends in death #it’s the tragedy of like ‘my favorite thing broke and I tried to fix it but it never came out the same’ #‘and I’m happy with it still but I wish I could go back and hold it like I did before’ #this isn’t a critism of the story btw #it’s just me going ‘man.. this is so sad :(‘

[meavitamin-notes]

yall i've been awake for 25+ hours lets see if i can do some account stuff before i succumb to feral

will edit post if i succeed edit: I've done the bare minimum!

Hello! After much deliberation i've come to realize i associate myself with the name meavitamin so much that my attempts to go under a different handle just couldn't click! so here i am editing my accounts under the haze of an unintentional all-nighter (but with much thought beforehand) with a very simple run down.

@meavitamin is now my official art account! finished works only, no ramblings of a mired human in a society, no really rough sketches, etc.! Just! Art! Original and Fanart! and clean tags!

@meavitamin-notes (this one!) is the exact opposite! messy with sketches, rambling thoughts, processes--the only time you'll ever see finished art is when i reblog with notes for myself (and for you if you're interested!) with critiques on how to improve the piece and what i need to work on. I'd like to think it would be a nice view into a mind of an artist that could be helpful if you're a budding artist yourself. you can think of this as a very public art journal :D

Last but not least, if you're interested, feel free to follow me on my insta @/meavitamin !!! who knew i would go back but here i am! it'll be a mix of fanart, sketches, and original art, but probably a little more curated to hide my personality!

that about wraps it up! thanks a lot everybody!

#text post #i wean myself off of coffee and go back to simple tea only for a restaurant to literally only have COFFEE (i had yet to have caffeine) #context i went to get brunch #laid awake in bed contemplating my existence before 4AM hit and i surrendered myself to reading on my phone #which does not help i am aware yes but anyway i hit the 24 hour mark an hour ago and my filter is off so i'm posting on here this wild exp #normally i would not but this is hilarious to me #was gonna draw today but i'm not even gonna try (though the thought interests me to see how it'd go) (not well probably) #why does this happen when i'm out of school and when i don't want to #anyway going to stop now bye #tags after edit: #let's see how this goes yall pray for my sanity #both rn and in the future with me managing social media lolol #i made my insta public but i actually don't have a lot to post rn so i'll probs work on a sketch tomorrow while i post gero too #the overuse of exclamation points means i should get off oops #really representative of the weird energy i have rn i think my body is trying to cope with the lack of sleep #okay that's tmi methinks but again. funny to me.

[inkskinned]

there are a lot of posts out there that are positive and healthy coping mechanisms for handling the holidays. this is not one of them :)

i think there's like. going to be times in your life you will be stuck in a social situation that you cannot escape from gracefully. i do not know why the internet doesn't believe these times exist. it's not always just that your physical safety is at risk - sometimes it's legit like "i just don't currently have the energy or time to put in the effort of responding to this." sometimes it's a coworker you hate so much. sometimes it's just like, fine, you know? like you know you can handle your aunt when she's cheerily horrible, but if you actually set a boundary around her, it's going to be weeks of fallout with your father.

i don't know why people think the answer is always just "cut them out!" or "don't let them get away with that!" because ... the real world is tricky and complicated. i think kind of a lot of us have an internal "radiation poisoning" meter for certain people. like - i'm talking about the ones who are absolutely giving you gradual ick damage. like, you can handle them, but you'll be exhausted.

and yes. you absolutely should listen to your therapist and the good posts about handling others and set good boundaries and take care of yourself. prioritize peace.

HOWEVER :) ...... since im often in a situation with a Gradual Sense of Ick person i cannot just "cut out" of my life (without losing someone else precious to me) - i have sort of developed the most. maladaptive form of mischief possible. because like, if i'm going to have to listen to this shit again, i like to have a little bit of private fun with it.

now! again, i am physically safe, just mentally drained by this man. you should only do this with people you are not in danger with. which leads me to my suggestions for when your Unfortunate Acquaintance shows up and says oh everyone pay attention to me.

my favorite word is "maybe!" said as brightly and happily as possible. whenever the Horrible Person starts in on a topic you do not want to go further with, particularly if they make a claim that you know to be inaccurate, do not respond to it. you and i have both tried to actually argue with this person, and it hasn't gone well, because this person just wants the drama of an argument. however, "maybe!" gives them literally nothing to go on. it is incredibly disarming. they are used to people having some response. they know they can't prove what they're saying, and maybe! treats them like the child they are. it dismisses them in the politest way possible.

i like to say maybe! and then, in their stunned silence, immediately change the subject. this is because i have adhd and i will have something unrelated to talk about, but if you can't think of topics fast enough, i recommend just pointing to something and saying, "isn't that lovely?" because fuck you let's bring in some positivity.

by the way. that second trick - of pointing to something and stating an opinion about it? - that just works on its own, like, 70% of the time. i picked it up from teaching preschoolers. it's an intentional "redirect". it stops children crying and it also stops grown adults from finishing their explanation on why women belong in kitchens. dual wielding!

keep it silly for yourself. i absolutely do not care if people think i'm fucking stupid (it's more fun if they do) and as a result i will purposefully misunderstand things just to see how long it takes them to realize i've completely removed them from the subject at hand. when they say "women aren't funny" i get to be like. "which women." "all women." "all women in america?" "no in the world." "like the mole people? the people in the world?" "what? no. like, alive." "oh are we not counting the mole people?" "what the fuck are you talking about." "you don't believe in the mole people?"

similarly, i play a personal game called "one up me." my Evil Acquaintance literally knows this game exists (my family & friends caught onto it and now also play it) and it always fucking gets him. i don't know why. you have to be willing to be a little free-spirited on this one, though. the trick is that when they make one of those horrible little bigoted or annoying comments they are always making, you need to go one unit weirder. not more intense, mind you - just more weird. "you don't look good in that dress." "yeah, actually, my other dress was covered in squid ink due to a mishap at the soup store." "you shouldn't wear such revealing clothes." "wait, what? oh shit. sorry, your son tears off strips when no one is looking and eats them. i swear it was longer before we left the building."

the point of "one up me" is to completely upend this person's narrative. we both know this person likes setting up situations where you cannot "win" and then they really like telling other people how badly you handled it. in a usual situation, if you respond "please don't say something that rude", you're a bitch. but if you let it happen, you're letting yourself be debased. they are not usually expecting door number three: unflappably odd. because what are they going to say when they're telling everyone how badly you behaved? "she said my son eats her dresses" ".... okay?"

if you can, form an allyship with someone whomst you can tagteam with. where they can pick up on your weird "soup store" story and run with it.

the following phrase is amazing and can be deployed for any situation: "oh, be nice :) it's the holidays!" i do not know why this works as often as it does. i'll say it for the most random shit. i think this is bc most of the time these people know they're being impolite, they just like to fight.

godbless. when in doubt, remember that you could always start stealing their pens.

the whole point of this is - if you can't escape. maybe see how long you can just be. like. a horrible little menace.

#this is objectively bad advice #don't listen to it protect yourself and do real work on yourself find one of the good posts i've made about this #but also. u know. if u want to have fun while u do the work of setting boundaries #.... it IS fun #i will say that my fear of him went SO down after i just started. fucking with him. #bc i used to get SO fucking upset #i'd spend WEEKS arguing with him. tearing my hair out. sick with anxiety and dread and anger about all of it #and now i just LITERALLY do not engage #instead i'm like '' haha :) mole people" and get the HELL out of any tense conversation #i kind of think some of these people are literally addicted to drama as a form of connection #they like the rush they get from arguing #but those arguments are incredibly damaging for me #so like..... i am in the process of literally rehabilitating this person to figure out how to find connection thru #NORMAL CONVERSATION #he doesn't get it yet #i also do talk to them like they're preschool kids lmafo . ''are you using a safe and kind voice right now?'' #'' do you need a snackie? you sound a little upset. let's have some hummus and come back to playtime when we feel ready''

[iliveinprocrasti-nationn]

taking a breath. going to sleep. this exam is going to be over in 12 hours no matter what happens. it will be over and done with and finished

#im nervous abt it but this is a coping strategy ive started to use bc it’s easy to go ‘i want this to be over now’ or ‘im so scared for this #event’ or other things but ultimately it’s going to end. the event snd all the responsibility and pressure of it will be gone #and that’s good and ok and natural because that’s just how things work #idk it just. helps. like yes im worried and nervous and stuff. but in 12 hours it’s done and I can move on #i do that with tbings i don’t wanna do. just. it’ll happen. but it’ll end. and then it’s done #it helps me a lot. both with events or when im not doing well physically or mentally #like i was havin a bad week n overwhelmed n grief was hittin a lil bit harder n stuff. but those feelings are gonna end and at some point im #going to feel happy about something. things cycle and that’s ok #just kinda musing before i go to sleep bc staying up and procrastinating and stressing isn’t gonna help #my post

[brainrotdotorg]

imagine a dashboard for alligators. what do you think that would look like

2 notes

🍏gatoridae Follow

Controversial opinion. If you're doing nothing but eating meat, what are you even doing. Remember to include bugs, fruits, and legumes into your diet in order to help aid digestion of the meat that you get from snakes, fish, and mammals.

Just because we have the reputation for eating lots of meat, that doesn't mean we have to stick to it.

🥒biting-you-biting-you Follow

counterpoint: fuit yucky

🪵blog-from-a-bog Follow

wdym reputation of eating meat. i float lik ea log thats what im known for

4,904 notes

🌿swamp-ass Follow

asked dad if i could go and steal some Floridian guy's lunch and he said "we have prey at home" girl we have been doing shit ALL DAY i am an awesome 600 pounds and I need some meat left on me to deathroll with. let me get a quick snack that i don't need to kill mmmmmmm burgers I want people food soooooo badddd....... i know they shouldn't feed it to me but I have such a lovely smile oh please oh please give me your burger.........

182 notes

🥗aliali-seeyoulater Follow

mom says it was cold the season she laid me so i have to be a girl. because girls are always born from eggs laid during cold seasons.

cope and seethe mother first of all, second of all, the reason i am transgender is because you kept me too fucking snuggly warm in the nest.

#i guess if you wanted a daughter you should have. idk. made a shittier nest? #thats not really my fault man

81,337 notes

⛰fuckyeahhugesnout Follow

You'll never guess how I just learned that we have the honor of being the "loudest reptiles in the world"

🫑teethem Follow

Yeah yeah, the 90 decibel mating bellow, we've all heard it.

🤢ch0mper Follow

we've all heard the what

135,633 notes

🩲gaytorrr Follow

this guy asked if i wanted to see his gator hole and i said fuck yes. why this boy take me into a 65 foot long hole in the mud at the bottom of the lake

6,421 notes

🏞daily-clawsitivity

✨Remember to take it easy sometimes!✨We thrive in slow-moving waters!✨Even though we can run fast, we get tired fast too-- it's okay to let yourself take breaks!✨Let yourself relax, that's how we made it this far as a species.

mud-rocks-deactivated20140706

Yeah, imagine telling your prehistoric great great great great great great great great great great grandpa or something to calm down and relax when he should be doing nothing but deathrolls. the longevity of the species should be your only goal. It's irresponsible to encourage your fucking species to fall behind even more than it already has? Have some pride, you're not a crocodile.

scalesssss-deactivated20150310

jesus christ calm down

alidile-crocogator-deactvated20140709

Okay, this post has a lot of misconceptions in it. There aren't as many differences between crocodiles and alligators than you think. It's really harmful to think that we have nothing in common with each other. So what if they're carnivores and we're closer to omnivores, or their snouts are more U shaped while ours are V shaped. We're both badass miracles of nature that have no reason to be pit against one another all the time.

Don't listen to guys like this. It's just hateful and small-minded.

stop-jawlock-androll-deactivated20140911

crocs are like. like them shoes that float right

wetlandia898 Follow

i wish i was a crocodile because i could have a virgin birth and i wanted to see what it would be like to eat an immaculate conception.

bigchallengesrealblog-deactivated20190412

welcome to the no notes gator/croc discourse post.

🦖l8rg8tr-z Follow

omg this is the post.... i can't believe i would see this naturally on my dash

🎍taildraggers Follow

Uh are we just going to ignore the virgin birth reply orrrrrrrrr

🐊gator-heritage-posts

gator heritage post

0 notes

aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa Follow

hgwiow h

hsfhjs

howw ws i nbevyrboy tyopingssaog oo vd wi hhrth rh thrre cl alawas ?>>

🌴a-l-g-t-r Follow

lmao this idiot never learned how to use their tail to type

#/j lol yeah its kind of hard at first #actually i'd say cut your losses and forget how to type bring the laptop back to the dumpster its not worth it

39 notes

🐍bellowbellowmygoodfellow Follow

am i fucking stupid. i just learned theres another species of alligator other than just me and the guys in my swamp. and i said "oh wow I didn't know that! which one of the two are we haha" and my buddy just stared at me like I was a fucking idiot. how am i supposed to know if no one ever tells me this . WHICH AM I

🍖meet-eat3r Follow

there are only 70-80 mature chinese gators in existence while there are 750,00-1 million mature american gators . do the math.

🐍bellowbellowmygoodfellow Follow

i could have just hatched you don't know me.

20,570 notes

🍀gatortears Follow

a group of queer gators in church call that a congregaytion

#reblogging this one bc none of you appreciate me

1 notes

👞makemeintoshoesdaddy Follow

I'm seeing the no notes gator/croc post circulate again and ha ha yes it's very funny, but we are NOT starting gator/croc discourse in 2024. lets leave that shit in the past. i know that's not what the post really ended up being about but i am soooooo sick of it.

🌾clawstothewalls Follow

okay, so the one with a fetish for getting turned into handbags is gonna talk down to us now.

👞 makemeintoshoesdaddy Follow

Not to be a pedant but its Shoes Actually. It even says so in the name. Shoes.

2,663 notes

#this post was all an excuse to tell you alligator fun facts #i fucking got you dude. i got you

[cinnamonest]

I'm not looking to start shit so I'm not linking it or anything, but you may have seen a recent anti-dark-content post circulating with a lot of notes making rounds in the x reader sphere and while I have nothing against people posting their feelings in their own private spaces, every time I see these kinds of posts there's a lot of misinformation that gets regurgitated in the reblogs/replies and I saw what looked like a battlezone in the replies, so.

I know posts like that can be very jarring and affects people like my readers, so to combat misinformation/shaming for anyone who saw it, I'm going to share some of my information on combatting fandom puritanism/misogyny/kinkshaming in its most common forms.

The most important fact, if you read nothing else, is this:

Most women have rape fantasies.

62% to be exact. I think the most pervasive myth on this content is that consumers are "weird" for it, when the numbers don't indicate that. You're in the majority!

The vast majority of people who have rape fantasies do not put them into practice in real life. A variety of factors can determine whether or not they do, particularly specific psychiatric disorders. (X)

To specifically address common harmful and pervasive myths:

the "go to therapy!" line

Generally any academic or professional resource will immediately tell you that consuming and engaging in "dark" fantasies is accepted and encouraged by mainstream psychiatry and part of the professional education for psychiatrists. (This also used to be pretty well-known until like the last 5 years or so, not sure why that changed.)

Here are some particularly insightful resources:

1) This article by Dr. David Wahl, in my opinion, hands-down does the best job of simply and thoroughly explaining why these fantasies occur and why couples practice CNC, as well as the fact that they are both harmless, psychologically beneficial to those with them, and not at all correlated to real-life rape.

2) Dr. Claudia Six has some of the best and most thorough material out there on the subject, specifically explaining why this is taught in mainstream academia psychology and how it is incredibly helpful to rape victims (X).

3) Lisa Diamond is a professional who focuses on this subject a lot, and was featured in the documentary "The Dilemma of Desire," in which she specifically focuses on how these fantasies are not correlated to real-life desires. (X)

4) Dr. Casey Lyle has specifically talked a lot on his socials about how fantasies, even in men/the perspective of the offender, do not correlate to actual risk of offending.

5) This article is not by a professional, but from the perspective of a survivor discussing how it is beneficial to survivors.

the "why would you want that?" line

The idea that fictional tastes = what you want to happen to you in real life is actually of misogynistic origin. I don't want to seek out or add links on this one, but if you're really curious, you can research about how the idea that "women read rape fiction, that means they secretly want rape!" was originally a classic "red pill"/MGTOW/4chan talking point that made its way into mainstream dialogue and thus the public mind in the last 15 years or so due to the incel epidemic popularizing those communities.

the "it's only valid for survivors then!" line

On one hand, yes it's very important to acknowledge that trauma victims use it to cope, however I feel that over-emphasizing that gives the impression that non-victims should be excluded from consumption of dark content, so to clarify, it's a very valid means for all women. Many women who have not personally experienced rape still fantasize about it, and that's fine.

The full explanation as to why this is true for many of them would be lengthy (and addressed in the aforementioned Dilemma of Desire documentary), but in the simplest terms, nonconsensual sex is the only context in which patriarchal society permits women to have sex at all without feeling guilt. For many women, particularly those in more heavily misogynistic or religious cultures, these fantasies are appealing because the idea of consensual sex may give them feelings of shame, guilt, "sin," etc. These fantasies allow them to experience the feeling of being desired without guilt of participation.

No society on earth is free of the psychological grip that cultural misogyny has on women, and shaming women for adapting to the conditions they are forced to exist under is as harmful as the misogyny that causes it itself.

ALL women experience a form of psychological trauma inherent to female childhood and female adolescence in a patriarchal world, and that is just as valid as coping with individual traumatic events.

Good resources on the subject of why women have these fantasies and how they are helpful in general:

(X) (X)

The "what you consume will make you do it in real life!" myth

Although the resources above already address this, it's important to establish why this myth is so prevalent and what its origins are.

The idea that consuming media with dark themes leads to or indicates desires to replicate those acts is a residual element of two major events:

1) Puritan revival culture, popularized in the US and UK in the 90s and 2000s (also known as "Satanic Panic"). A major facet of this movement was TV megachurch preachers making money off of exploiting well-meaning but paranoid parents into believing that your child playing Dungeons and Dragons or Pokemon would make them future serial killers and lure them into satanic cults. (X)

2) at the tail end of this, it was cemented in the public mind as a cultural ripple aftershock of the Columbine shooting, where this sentiment became popularized as the general public blamed violent video games like Doom and "dark" music like Marilyn Manson (whose life was temporarily completely upended by the events and took him years to recover/be safe from) for the 1999 shooting. This event had MASSIVE permanent and global effects in all sorts of ways that the public often underestimates the sheer scope of, notably that it solidified, prolonged, and, in the minds of many, "proved" the paranoias of the preexisting Satanic Panic. (X) This established a precedent, leading to virtually any major horrible event being blamed on the perpetrator's media consumption, including murder and sex crimes.

What this myth ignores in the cases it references (the slenderman stabbings, columbine, sasebo slashing, batman shooting, etc) is two crucial facts: that hundreds of millions of people consume the same media with no negative effects (helpful effects even), and that in every single case cited as "evidence" to the claim, the perpetrator had a preexisting psychiatric condition correlated to acts of violence (which usually went ignored, downplayed and even accelerated/worsened by those around them rather than the help they needed).

Sorry for the wall of text, but I feel an ethical obligation to combat this kind of misinformation, and I hope these resources are helpful for those who may be negatively affected by common misunderstandings.

You are not abnormal or wrong for the fictional content you consume or the fantasies you have!

#im very passionate about this because this sort of thing severely affected younger me #and i dont want that for anyone else! #love yall

[audreycritter]

every time i see a post talking about how alfred pennyworth failed bruce for not getting him into therapy as a kid i want to scream.

it did not exist. the idea that children could have PTSD was just starting to be discussed in the late 80s/early 90s at the FRINGE of child psychology, and then trauma therapy even for adults spent an unhelpful 2ish decades dominated by forced-conversation talk therapy. that's a thing that is detrimental to trauma recovery, because if someone doesn't feel safe or in control of the dialogue about their trauma and is repeatedly asked to describe their trauma when they're uneasy, it COMPOUNDS TRAUMA AND FEELINGS OF DANGER.

when bruce was a kid, even the best psychs available would have had training that taught them kids bounce back, that kids don't respond to or handle trauma the way adults do, and that any behaviors post-trauma were almost certainly unrelated mental illness.

i see this esp in fandom circles but a gentle reminder that therapy even when it's good doesn't fix everything. even if bruce had HAD access to good childhood PTSD therapy, he would still have grief, he would still potentially be socially awkward or withdrawn, he might have still decided to be Batman because it's a comic book where being a vigilante isn't as wild as it is irl.

therapy requires honesty, readiness, safety, sound application of theory, an accurate picture of life outside the therapy room (self-reporting is often flawed!), consistency, and more! it can help but it doesn't erase trauma or grief. it's dismissive of the history of trauma therapy to say an adult "should have" had a kid in a therapy approach that didn't exist, and it's dismissive of the actual work of therapy to act like therapy would have made everything ideal. bruce isn't going to be a normal, well-adjusted adult because his parents were murdered in front of him. he could be happy! he could have coping skills! but honestly it would be weirder if he didn't wrestle with residual trauma and grief throughout his life.

and maybe this is just because i love Batman, and love specifically Batman as a symbol/figure of hope and sacrifice and the belief that every life matters, but I don't think the worst ending here is Bruce deciding to give up a lot of his time, energy, and health to work in Gotham AND then choose to parent a traumatized child and actively meet his needs. like you think the alternative is that Alfred is a better parent by getting him into non-existent therapy and then he stays comfortably wealthy at home and is just another rich dude? that's the ideal version? the one who can't help Dick Grayson because Dick Grayson wants to run away and murder a man?

anyway tl;dr alfred should have flaws, yes, but there's a big gap between "flawed human parental figure" and "man who massively failed Bruce in multiple ways, one of which was not putting him in therapy."

#rant #therapy #history #batman

[letters-to-lgbt-kids]

My dear lgbt+ kids,

Can you have a healthy relationship with a narcissist?

Well, if you trust many social media posts, then the answer would be a resounding "No". Narcissistic is - apparently - a synonym for abusive, and of course you can't have a healthy relationship with an abusive partner!

But, well, social media is not always right. A lot of topics get oversimplified, terms get misused and black-or-white thinking is rampant - and "narcissistic means abusive" falls into all three of those pits.

Let's look at it a bit closer: "Abusive" describes a set of behaviors - while narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) describes, well, a personality disorder. It's a mental health condition.

I am not a trained mental health professional, so I'll use a medical source here. According to mayoclinic.org (link to article), symptoms and their intensity may vary from one affected person to the next (just like the exact symptoms and severity of depression or anxiety may vary!). A person with NPD may

have an unreasonably high sense of their own importance

have an excessive need for attention and admiration

have low/no empathy (struggle to understand or care about the feelings of others)

have low self-worth

be easily upset by criticism

struggle with social interactions

have difficulty managing their emotions

experience major problems dealing with stress 

And, again just like with other mental health conditions, NPD can negatively affect the person in a lot of areas of life. For example, struggling to manage their emotions and stress levels may make it hard for them to hold down a job and cause financial worries, or they may avoid participating in social events, which may lead to them becoming isolated and depressed etc. And yes, of course some symptoms may also lead to problems in romantic relationships.

Therapy for NPD usually centers around talk therapy, with the goal of helping the person to better understand and manage their emotions, to learn how to cope with self-worth issues, and to create/maintain healthy fulfilling relationships and communication with the people around them.

Now, you can look at all this and go "See? The social media posts are right! They are self-centered, have no empathy and are easily upset! That's abusive!" - but that'd be jumping to conclusions. None of those things are behaviors.

An autistic person may also easily get upset and they may also feel low empathy. So could a person with major depression. Yet, we do not treat "autistic" or "depressed" as a synonym for abusive. We do not assume that their symptoms will definitely lead to abusive behavior. So, why would that be different for people with NPD?

Am I saying no person with NPD has ever been abusive? Of course not. That'd be black-or-white thinking, too. What I am saying is: People with NPD are people. And people can show abusive behavior or they can not.

If someone who easily feels upset hits you, that's abuse... but hitting would be abuse, even if they didn't feel easily upset. A partner with or without NPD shouldn't be hitting you. If someone with no empathy degrades and insults you, that's abusive... but that would be abuse regardless of their ability to feel empathy. A partner with or without NPD shouldn't be degrading and insulting you.

A person could have NPD and behave abusive - but "some people are X and Y, so all people who are X must be Y" is a flawed logic.

So, let's circle back to the beginning: can you have a healthy relationship with a narcissist? Yeah. It will be a relationship with someone who has a mental health condition and that's something to be aware of because mental health conditions do affect everyday life (duh?).

You should set boundaries and take warning signs of abuse seriously - like you should do when you date anyone, regardless of health status.

With all my love,

Your Tumblr Dad

#lgbt #lgbt+ #obviously not a lgbt specific topic but I wanted to talk about it