#It ate up all of the buffer days I worked so hard on building up

[its-a-beautful-day]

Wednesday - Morrie the Moray Eel

I had one of these silly guys growing up and tried my best to capture the unique pattern their fabric has

#star's art #my art #artist on tumblr #beanie babies #beanie baby #Morrie the moray eel #Moray eel #Eel #Ocean art #Sea illustration #beaniebabytober #inktober #drawtober #This piece took so long to make #It ate up all of the buffer days I worked so hard on building up #But it's done #Please enjoy these eels #Yes I didn't add their teeth #I was done

[trillian-anders]

true love

pairing: bucky barnes x reader

warnings: fluff && smut, bucky being a cheeky little shit and soft boy

word count: 2.7k

description: stripper au; bucky is a tease and honestly just such a gooey romantic. just a little snapshot. 

A strip club before hours. Inside you’d find the dancers stretching, practicing new routines and a loop of the same song over and over again until they were satisfied or being forced to move onto something else. The servers are wiping down tables, setting up for bachelorette parties and straightening the chairs around the main stage. The host was cleaning the mirrors and the front door with Windex, knowing that they would just be covered with prints from hands and fingers an hour into the night.

The bar was being stocked, backup bottles. Fruit was being cut and sangria being prepped. Gallons of it. The clientele loved sangria. The cocktail of the night, special for the bride to be prepped for the bachelorette party, paid for in advance by the bottle. A sugar bomb of midori sour and vodka, cherries and club soda. Neon green and toxic, it made you gag just mixing it together.

It was the same thing every night. Another bachelorette party, another batch mixed drink, another stack of ones ready to be switched out for bigger bills the clients needed to break in order to stuff those dollar bills in the g-string of one of the many handsome performers that would take the stage tonight.

A destination strip club under the same corporation that owned Magic Mike, just on the east coast. It would be busy. But you and the other three bartenders were ready, the money was good here. Too good for you to ever consider leaving. And since the clientele was made in its entirety women and gay men, you felt safe working there. No sleazy guy on his sixth bud lite wanting to grab your ass as you cleaned up after his spilled beer. Granted some of the clients were still hellish, but you’d take not getting groped over being sexually harassed by bar patrons any day.

The lights would drop low soon, music pumping through the speakers as the DJ finishes setting up his booth. The endless grind from 8pm to 3am that would leave you ready for some diner food and bed.

“Boys!” You call, “What do you want?” Allowed a start of work drink, you called to the men standing on the stage.

“Anything you wanna give me sugar.” You glare at the first man to respond, his cheeky grin knowing how much you hated it when he called you sugar, how patronizing.

“Okay, everyone but Bucky,” You laugh, “What do you want?” The man in question slipping off the stage to walk over and help distribute shots.

“Why are you always so mean to me?” Pouting and arms crossed on the bar. You roll your eyes pouring the requests of green tea shots across the board. And an extra-large one for you and your favorite performer.

“Why are you always so annoying?” A rebuttal. But he loved it. He always does. Your shot glass clinking against his, tapping on the bar top and shot back in two.

“I love you.” He hums, stealing a kiss. The tip of his tongue brushing your bottom lip softly before pulling away and setting his shot glass in yours.

“I love you too.” A shared grin. “Have fun tonight.”

“Oh I will.” He’s cheeky, but it’s a part of him that you found so endearing.

A story you’re sure you’d tell the grandkids, how you met him in the first place. Back when you first started working here. He’d already been performing for a while. Back when you were waiting tables and having to deal with the sloppy drunk clients without a buffer of service bar in between.

Truly romantic how he’d been grinding himself against a woman in a bridal sash and giving you the same cheeky grin that he gives you now. You watched him grip himself through the silk thong and tripped and spilled your tray over a table and all the clients sitting there. An order to go get some air and you cried in the alley behind the building thinking that you were going to get fired and when his set was finished he came looking for you.

“They’re not going to fire you,” He soothed, pulling you into his arms, “You’re gonna be just fine.” You choked out nasty sobs into his chest, the thin zip hoodie he was wearing doing nothing to disguise the firm bare flesh underneath, you maybe pretended to have the need to be held a little longer than you actually did.

That incident was something he carefully held over your head to this day, a funny jab, especially after a night of seeing stars and loud moans. The paint chipped and wall worn where the headboard slammed into it. He wouldn’t paint over it as a matter of pride. A story of his sexual prowess and ability to bend you in half and make you cum so hard that you blackout or cry split on his dick.

He’d convinced you to go back into the club after you calmed down, he bought you a drink after the shift had ended, and then ate you out on his couch after you’d had pancakes at the diner below his apartment. And you’d been in love ever since.

That sick, ooey-gooey, no you hang up kind of love.

“You guys are so gross.” Nat bumped her hip against yours, grabbing the remaining shot glasses and sitting them in the dishwasher. You laugh.

The night began with body paint and blacklights. A steady pump of bass as each performer took the stage, they made their rounds around the room. Back curtains closing for private dances. The bar was full and service bar was popping, the tickets endless. The tip jar stuffed full. A good night. As bachelorette parties often were. They would take up a nice little section, the rest of the walk-ins and birthday parties, etc. taking up the rest of the space.

You could feel his eyes on you, the little games he liked to play at work. He knew you would look at him. The way he danced on stage, sinking down to let someone stick a dollar on his hip. The way he grabbed himself to the squeals of women.

The fucking tease, tugging his lip and meeting your eye. A playful smirk. Watching you shake a drink.

The first time he played this game was the day after he made you cum on his tongue, then his fingers, then his cock. Twice. As you wait tables, he would give you that little smirk, the grind of his hips, a brush against you as you walked around him with your tray. A playful tug on your skirt.

It would end with his back on the wood floor of his apartment, hands gripping your hips hard enough to bruise while you rode yourself to orgasm. Knees red and sore. And continue after eating a snack on his kitchen floor, your back now on the linoleum and your knees pressed to your chest while you dug your fingernails into his biceps and down his back. Something hastily fixed with concealer for his next performance.

Your friends outside of work didn’t quite understand how you could deal. “How could you be okay with him grinding himself over other people all night?” But you knew one thing more than anything else,

Bucky Barnes was such a simp.

He fucking loved you. And you knew it. He would never let you forget it. Bucky Barnes was the most affectionate, needy, clingy, I would die for you and all you have to do is ask kind of guy. He was the kind of guy to tell you that he missed you when you just went to the store. The kind of guy that would hop in the shower with you just because he wanted to wash your hair.

“I’m not worried.” You would laugh, “Not in the slightest.” And you knew you didn’t have to be. If the way he would hop up on your bar and tug on your hair mid dance was anything to say, him stuffing bills into your bra while you let a girl do a body shot out of his belly button. You didn’t care as much as those dollars and groping hands on his thick thighs you loved to ride would be paying your rent later.

These clients may be groping him now, but later on it’s your thighs that his head will be between.

It’s their money that will be sitting on your living room floor while both of you unwrinkled the freshly washed money. Their money you would use to buy groceries and pay for your portion of the family vacation you were going on in a few months with the Barnes clan.

The shift ends and you’re left cleaning up. With three other pairs of hands it’s quick work, but burning the ice takes a minute, long enough for Bucky to already be sitting down in front of the bar and sorting your tips out for you, sipping on an after shift drink the two of you were sharing.

“We going to Norma’s?” As the other men sunk down behind the bar, a few waving their goodbyes on their way out the door.

“Sam.” Bucky looked at his friend, “We go to Norma’s every night and every night you ask if we are going.”

“It’s because he likes that waitress.” Nat grinned, flipping the dishwasher on to run the bar mats. A glare from Sam,

“I love that waitress.” The bumbling idiot fawned over her and always tipped her $50 on his $8 patty melt. A shared laugh,

“You’ve asked her out, how many times now?” Steve, thankful for the leftover sangria in front of him, took a sip.

“Just like four, five maybe.” Bucky lifted the pint glass, salt lining the rim and a few granules left on his bottom lip. “This margarita is good sweetheart.” A recipe you found online, something new you’d wanted to try. You hum, taking a sip and nodding. “She doesn’t like you.” Directed at Sam. “You need to stop making her job so difficult, you’re a creep.”

“Am I a creep?” Sam looks between you and Nat. The two of you sharing a look and nodding.

“No one wants to get hit on while they’re working.” You laugh, “That’s all.” He huffs, leaning against the back of the bar stool.

“You guys got any of that neon shit left?” The last little bit of the bachelorette slosh at the bottom of the Cambro. Poured in a glass for him with an apologetic smile.

“I already burned the ice.” He muscled it down.

Bucky’s hand in your back pocket with you tucked into his side you entered the familiar diner and slipped into your usual booth, a playful squeeze to your ass before you sunk down next to each other. Sam, Nat, and Steve across.

His hand settles on your thigh as the waitress Sam was in love with brought over two pitchers of water and glasses, more to make her job easier because these boys were thirsty at the end of the night after performing for hours on end.

A minute later she’d return with a couple sodas and take the order. Sam looking dutifully down at his phone and trying to avoid her eyes.

“You can act like a normal person.” You laugh, our leg going across Bucky’s thigh. “You’re acting like even more of a weirdo.”

“Just relax.” Nat’s hand smoothed over Sam’s arm and he lets out a deep breath. “Don’t be weird.” Easier said than done, he took the fact that you told him not to flirt with her as erasing his whole personality.

“You’ve ruined him.” Steve sipped his water, “The both of you.” A pout to stern Dad-Steve, and he rolled his eyes with a smirk, leaning against the booth and throwing an arm over the back. “He’ll never be able to perform again.”

“Fuck all of you.” Sam glared as peals of laughter broke out at the table. A shift as you felt Bucky’s fingers play with the hem of your shorts. Dipping under a little bit. Your hand slips down and grabs his, pulling his hand away with a playful glare.

“Stop.” Whispered between you as Sam pretended to cry and Nat seemed about done with it.

“I wanna play.” A kiss on your lips. You shake your head and roll your eyes, directing your attention back to your friends.

“Later.”

Later would find him on his back lips red bitten and swollen from kissing as you yank his jeans down his legs, leaving him in just his briefs, the hard outline of his cock pressing against them. Your shorts and panties tugged down your legs, crawling over him to hover over his face. His arms wrapping around your thighs and bringing you down to his mouth.

The grind of your hips on his tongue and the rough stubble burning your thighs. Those moans vibrating against your clit, panting moans coming from your mouth as you grip the headboard and find the friction your need to cum. Working out your aftershocks on his tongue.

A shift of position would find your back against the mattress, your legs over his arms and hooked into his elbows, the blunt head of his cock circling your entrance with the teasing roll of his hips. His mouth against yours, sucking on your tongue and tugging your bottom lip between his teeth.

He starts off slow. A gasp into his mouth as he bottoms out, the tip of him brushing your cervix before he pulls almost all the way out, playing with short and fast thrusts against your g-spot. This was his major source of pride, having you drooling and stupid with lust under him, eyes rolling and nails digging into his back, clawing at his biceps, twisted in the sheets by your head while he rolls one of your nipples on his tongue.

The headboard slamming as you gush around his cock, the signal he needs to start thrusting in deeper to chase his own pleasure. Leaning back onto his heels and pressing your legs together, wrapping his arm around them and laying a kiss to your ankle. His red mouth panting as his hips slapped against yours. Your fingers dipping between your bodies to slap against your clit a couple times, the pleasure being too much. He pushes your hand out of the way, hand laying over your mons and thumb pressing against your clit, moving in tight circles.

“So fucking good for me baby.” A pant against your calf. “One more.” A groan, “Just one more.” You sob from the over-sensitivity as he brought you to one more orgasm, the towel laid out on the bed being put to good use as you squirt on his cock. His hips not relenting until you feel him cum, your legs shaking on his shoulders.

A kiss to your ankles. His hands massaging your legs as you come down. He lays himself on top of you, shifting your legs to wrap around his waist as he meets your lips once, twice, soft, “I love you.” And then with his head on your chest. You reason in that moment, and in every moment, that he was the best thing that ever happened to you.

Finding the club was the best thing that ever happened to you.

“You’re just so handsome.” Your hand on your fist, resting your elbow on the table, looking at him in admiration.

He grins around the lip of his coffee cup and softly massages your foot that was in his lap. The morning found you in the same diner as the night previous, enjoying what would be lunch for other people, but breakfast for the two of you.

“You’re just so beautiful.” His hand meeting yours on the table, a soft squeeze. “I love you.” Bringing his hand to your lips,

“I love you too.”

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes #sebastian stan #steve rogers #captain america #sam wilson #natasha romanov #tfatws #the falcon and the winter soldier

[anastasiabeaverhousen87]

Praying to the porcelain God

words: 3205

You been told before never to eat from suspicious food stands, especially if you never tried them before or if Kara or Alex haven’t already approved the food. But today you forgot your lunch at home and the food from the cafeteria was not very appealing for you. One of your co-workers saw you make faces at the food options and invited you to eat lunch with them. They were going to get burgers from a new street vendor a couple of blocks away. It was too tempting; you love cheeseburgers and they made it sound like they were really good. So, you said yes. Everyone was going and you were starving.

The following day you woke up feeling a little odd, a bit nauseous but you didn’t think anything about it. You got a chamomile tea instead of coffee and went about your day as usual. Kara was already gone so you just decided to grab a yogurt and granola bar at work.

You finished getting your things ready and were about to leave the apartment when you felt a sharp pain in your stomach followed by cramping. You went to the bathroom and removed your sweater, you felt a swelling of your abdomen and yes, you lower abdomen was inflamed and felt tender to the touch. Another painful cramp made you run to the toilet and you knew you were screwed the moment you sit down.

y/n: “Fuck!!!, ughh it hurts…damn it, Alex is going to kill me” – you didn’t leave the bathroom for a while, you lamented your poor choices while you were sitting in the toilet seat.

 You decided you needed to let someone know you felt like shit and wouldn’t be able to get to work with further incidents, so you called Kara. Kara was softer and if you play your card right maybe she could be the buffer between Alex’s lecturing and you.  You dialed her number and put it on speaker while washing your hands, you were standing Infront of the sink mirror and put the phone down.

 Kara: “Hi sweet girl, what’s up?”

You were about to respond when you felt nausea hit hard, you saw your reflection become green and you ran to toilet once again. Just in time for you to continue emptying your stomach contents, tears sprung into your eyes as the pain in your stomach grew stronger and effort of being violently ill into the porcelain bowl.

On the other side of the line, Kara was listening to you suffering. “Y/N baby? What’s wrong, where are you?” but at not getting a response she ditched everything to fly straight home following your heartbeat.

You stopped vomiting and felt exhausted, you spit into the toilet and flush it.  You use toilet paper to clean you mouth and drop to the bathroom floor exhausted.  Kara enter the apartment looking for you.

Kara: “y/n?, oh my God what’s wrong baby?”- Kara panics at looking at your body sprawled in the bathroom floor all pale and clammy.

y/n: “Ughh best guess? stomach bug. I just puked my guts out, and before that I emptied my bowels in a different way” - you grimace at the explosive diarrhea you went through less than half an hour ago.

Kara: “Oh sweetie, I’m sorry you feel so poorly. Come on, let me pick you up from the floor”- the blonde woman tries to pick you up, but you feel like you’re not quite over.

Y/n: “Kara, I don’t think I can move quite yet and the floor is cold, it feels nice” –you move a little on the floor to get more of the chilly sensation on your hot skin- “I feel like crap sissy” a tear runs down your cheek and you look up to your sister. Kara brushes the tear away and cradles the side of your face. You are about to move again into a sitting position when you feel your stomach painfully cramp again and you roll into a fetal position trying to make the pain lessen somehow.

Kara: “Oh baby, looks like a horrible stomach bug. But I’m so bad at human illnesses let me call Alex really quick, she is the best when it comes to this kind of things.” Kara looks desperate and seeing you so sick on the floor. Kara is now sitting next to you holding your head in her lap and running her fingers through your hair.

Y/N: “You can’t, busy. Summit in New York” – you mumble trough clenching teeth.

Kara: “I know she is busy with work, but she can take a phone call if it’s an emergency. Its her or the ER. Your call.”

y/n: “Alex…” – you much prefer hearing your helicopter sister ask a thousand question that being prod and wait in the Emergency Room.

Kara takes her phone out of her pocket and dials the number; it rings a few times and then it connects.

Alex: “Hey what’s up, everything okay?”- the red head asks immediately, knowing her sisters wouldn’t be calling her if it was not an emergency.

Kara: “No, y/n is sick. I just found her on the bathroom floor all clammy and she told me she vomited a lot. Also, she thinks it’s a stomach bug.” You can´t hear what Alex says on the phone, then Kara turns the phone on speaker “Ok hold on, yes. Ok ok now you’re on speaker now”

Alex: “Hi little one. I’m so sorry you got sick baby and I bet you feel awful but I need to ask you a few things ok?”

You nod, even though Alex cant see you, but you think if you can let her think it’s a stomach bug going around the office you’ll be off the hook and avoid the speech on getting food from street vendors.

Y/n: “Yeah ok…”- you feel to tire so yes, you can answer whatever she wants as longs she doesn’t ask you to move.

Alex: “Ok sweetie, Kara mentioned vomiting, what else are you feeling? Do you also have diarrhea? is she warm or cold Kara?

Y/N: “painful cramps, diarrhea definitely that was first and the puked my guts out. Honestly, I don’t think there’s anything left inside my intestines by this point. It was super gross Alex. I feel a little cold now. There’s a bug going on around the office and some of the guys got sick”- you say the last part a bit fast and avoid looking at Kara, then you groan in pain at another cramp.

Kara: “She is all clammy, her cheeks are flush, and she is shivering a little. Also, she is now avoiding direct eye contact…” – Kara raises an eyebrow at you, knowing there’s something you are avoiding.

Alex: – “y/n baby, was your stool a little bloody and watery? Or soft and muddy? , also Kara can you check her abdomen does it look a little swollen and prod very gently please “

y/n: “first one”- You can hear Alex give a long sigh

Kara: “definitely swollen and a bit tender”

Alex: “What did you eat yesterday either at lunch or dinner? And don’t even think about lying to me y/n. I will know if you are lying. That’s not just a stomach bug”

Kara is looking down at you worry on her face, “We ate steak and mashed potatoes with some veggies last night. Lena cooked. and I know I can’t get sick, but Lena was okay. So, what did you eat for lunch baby?”

Y/n: “a cheeseburger” –you mumble

Alex: “Where?”

y/n: “A new place near the building, a few of the guys I work with we got burgers yesterday”

Alex: “when you say ´new place, you mean a well stablished franchise or restaurant? Not a street vendor with doubtful hygiene and suspicious meat or produce, right? -  ughh busted, you thought.

y/n: “Street vendor” – you lamented

Kara: “ohh sweetie. You know better than that”- Kara kept her gentle touch but looking a bit disappointed in you.

Alex: “Well baby, I hope the burger was so amazing and worth it, because what you have is food poisoning and most likely due to contaminated ground beef with E. coli. There is nothing to stop it or make it better faster. Your body will get rid of the bacteria during the following days. Simply needs to run its course.”

Y/N: “No cheeseburger in world is worth this pain or disgusting vomiting or explosive diarrhea. I feel like crap Lexie”- you play your Lexi card, so your big sister takes pity on you. You feel bad enough as it is, you don’t need to hear more disappointment from her.

Alex: “I know baby girl. Its quite uncomfortable and painful. You need rest and avoid over exerting, that will only make your stomach feel worse. Kara, I need you to make sure she drinks lots of fluids, she will keep vomiting and having constant bowel movements in the next couple of days and she can get dehydrated very quickly. Lots of water and Pedialyte . Let her stomach to settle first .  Avoid giving her any solid foods until she is no longer nauseous or vomiting as much. Avoid juices or other beverages with a lot of sugar or sweeteners that can make diarrhea worse. Let’s wait for 24 hours like this without any food and after that we can see if you can ease her back into eating soft and bland food. Call me if she gets worse or if the fever is too high.”

Y/N: “not even hungry anyways…”

Kara: “will do Alex, I’m taking off work for the week I’ll let Lena know. She is out of town as well, but I can handle goober just fine. right kiddo?”

You just try to crawl into Kara’s lap you starting to feel cold and so very tired. “Yeah, I’m cold. You warm”

Alex: “She will sleep a lot, wake her up and make her drink water or fluids Kara, its very important. Make sure her temperature doesn’t go above 102 F. if she get above that range just make her take a bath in lukewarm water or use a cold compress. Let her eat ice chips, NO dairy, no caffeine, no sugar, or fatty food. If she does eat those, she will end up throwing up everything. If temperature goes above 103 take her immediately to the ER. It shouldn’t but keep an eye on that. Seriously Kara call me anytime ok?”  

Kara: “Will do Alex. Thanks, and I’ll call you later once y/n is more comfortable and asleep”

Alex: “Ok, feel better sweetie, I’ll be back as soon as I can. Be good for Kara and try to relax and let your body get rid of everything at its own pace. Don’t rush anything. I love you sweetheart. Love you Kara, bye”

Y/N “Bye, love you Lexie”

Kara: “Bye Alex, love you too” – the phone calls gets disconnected. Kara looks down at you. “You think you are ready to move from the bathroom floor to the living room?”

y/n: “can you help me up to rinse my mouth? It tastes like crap ugh”

Kara: “of course. Up we go”- Kara gently stands up with you in her arms and helps you to your feet.

But you get dizzy and grab ahold of Kara’s arms for support

Kara: “hey hey I got you, easy there baby girl”

y/n: “everything its spinning and I don’t feel so g…” but before you can finish the sentence your eyes go wide and Kara see what’s about to happen and helps you to your knees in front of the toilet once again. Kara holds your hair away from your face with her other hand rubbing soothing circles down your spine while providing word of comfort.

You keep vomiting for a few minutes more “ughh I thought I had ridden of everything by now. This Is so disgusting” a few tears leak down your cheeks and Kara just helps you to your feet again and flushes the toilet.

Kara: “I know sweet girl, but Alex did say you will be experiencing vomiting and other stuff for a few days. So, let’s get you rinse your mouth and settle down in the couch so you can sleep this off, okay?”

You just nod and work on getting your teeth brushed and get rid of the nasty taste. Kara helps you to your room to change into your pajamas.

Kara: “Bed or couch?” -you just point down to your bed giving her your answer. “Okay okay” Kara lowers you on your bed and goes to close the curtains so you can rest more comfortably.

y/n: “Hold me?”- you pout pitifully

Kara: “of course baby girl. Let me just get your water and text Lena to let her know I won’t be into work for a few days and also text your boss you’re sick” – I’ll be right back.

y/n:” don’t want water please just hold me, I’m cold sissy”- more tears run down your cheeks, you just want your sister to hold you now.

Kara: “aww chucks, baby you feel real awful don’t ya? Ok here I’ll call later, and you need to drink water in an hour or two. I will wake you up. come here sweet bean”- Kara moves you so you are now lying basically on top of her, you hide your face into her neck and wrap your arms around her. You are leaching on her warmth shamelessly. Kara doesn’t mind at all begins to pat down your back softly like when you were little she needed to calm you down and put to to sleep.

Kara: “Aww my little koala is here. You’re so cuddly baby. I’m sorry you are feeling so poorly but I’ll be here with you all the time. You just close your eyes and go to sleep. You’ll feel better in no time, you’ll see”

y/n: “I’m never eating cheeseburgers again”- you give a yawn and began to drift off. Kara juts chuckles and starts to hum softly a lullaby song she uses since you were a little girl and where having trouble falling asleep or felt sick. You are out in less than 5 minutes.

Kara wait for you to be completely asleep to grab her cellphone she still has on her pocket. Texts Lena you are sick and will call her later, but you are okay just miserable for eating street food. And then sends a quick text to y/n boss, thank Rao she is close friends with y/n otherwise would be a pain to explain why she is texting instead of her employee.

Kara puts the cellphone down on the nightstand and holds y/n more to her chest and begins to run her hand up and down y/n spine and watches her sleep for a little while until herself starts to feel sleepy and decides to take a nap too.

Kara is awaken by your moving around and painful moaning. You curl into yourself as much as you can, trying to wave through the painful cramp in your tummy.

y/n: “It really hurts Kara, it hurts so bad”- you say through clenching teeth and tears sprung into your eyes once again. You feel miserable and in so much pain.  

Kara feels you are getting a bit hotter now and you are sweating too. “Okay little one, I think a bath can help you now, and you need to drink a little bit of water. Come here”

y/n: “No. pelease, no Kara. I just want the pain to stop and sleep again. I don’t want a bath” -you cry softly into her neck

Kara: “I’m sorry baby, but you feel too warm and you will feel better after the bath. I’ll stay with you the whole time.”

Kara picks you up from the bed and takes into the bathroom, she sits you down at the toilet seat while she runs a lukewarm bath for you.

Y/n: “Kara I don’t feel so good…” again you turn green and Kara helps you to sit infront the porcelain bowl once more.

You throw up again, but its mostly bile. Kara holds your hair out of your face while making comforting rubs on your lower back while you continue to be sick. your stomach its already empty from all the previous vomiting and you didn’t really eat anything for breakfast. You feel so weak after the effort it took to vomit once again. You are sweaty and pale and slump into Kara. Kara gently runs a hand down your spine and grabs a small towel to clean off the bile in your lips.

Kara: “sshh …baby come one. Its over now.  Here use this mouth wash to rinse and spit it in the toilet” -Kara then flushes the toilet and strips you off your clothes. She also strips down to her underwear and gets into the tub with you.  She helps you lean into her so she can wash your skin with a soft washcloth and pour the lukewarm water down your body to cool you down. After a while she notices your feel cooler to the touch. Washes your hair gently and lets you lean back onto her. You have always loved the skin to skin contact when feeling sick or unwell. Your sisters have done this many times over the years as well as you mom Eliza. You like feeling their warm skin and listen to their heartbeat. But Kara posses a special feature, she is warmer than any human. You feel her skin on you help you with the chills and you feel yourself drifting off to sleep again.

Kara notices you are almost asleep, and decides you are cool enough now and gently nudges you awake.

Kara: “sweet girl please don’t fall asleep quite yet. Let me dry you off a bit and you need to drink a little bit of water. Then you can sleep again promise”

You grunt in disapproval “Nuh uh … don’t wanna, I just want sleep”

Kara: “ I know sweetie but its not an option, come one”- Kara immediately stands and grabs ahold of you and takes one of the bath robes and uses one on her and then she uses a big fluffy towel to pat you down enough to remove the water excess but leaving your skin a bit damp to help keeping you cool.

She takes you back to your room and sets you on top of the bed and quickly grabs a set of lose shorts and tank top to avoid overheating you.  She then sits you with you back on a pillow resting against the headboard while she speeds to the kitchen to get you ice water.

Kara: “Okay sweetie small sips, just a few smalls sips and that’s it.”- she makes you drink a bit of water and leaves the glass on the nightstand again. You notice she is now wearing a pajamas too and in the nightstand there’s also a bowl with water and a few small towels and an empty plastic bow- “Just in case you feel sick and need to vomit again and avoid a trip to the bathroom”

Y/N:” thank you sissy”- you tear up and your chin trembles.

Kara: “No no don’t cry baby girl. Come here”- she gently lifts you up sits down and then lays you on her side you head resting on her collarbone. She left her soft button- up pajama top mostly open so you can lean into her and feel her skin near the collarbone and upper chest. You settle down and keep listening to her heartbeat.

Kara: “sshh sshh…sweetie just close your eyes and sleep. You’ll feel better soon just sleep now” – once again you feel her gentle touch on your back, down your arms and temple. And that soft voice humming the melody you associate with comfort. you move a little trying to find the perfect spot and just like that in less than 10 minutes you’re asleep.

#supergirl #alex x baby danvers #baby danvers #baby!danvers #alex danvers #baby danvers x kara #baby danvers imagine #b!d #sickfic #i feel sick #vomit warning #food poisoning #caretaker #skin to skin

[everybodyscupoftea]

lights down low

rafe cameron x reader

word count: 3818

warnings: some cursing; underage drinking; mentions of weed; shitty parents; i think that’s it this is just soft

synopsis: two family disappointments finding each other based on the song lights down low by MAX

a/n: we’re living in my world baby, and in my world rafe cameron isn’t a murderer or a coke addict, he’s just a sad boy with daddy issues

You met Rafe at school. The two of you weren’t really friends, but you weren’t enemies either, just casual acquaintances. If you saw him at parties, you’d say hey, but if you saw him in public, you’d only nod. Rafe had a certain…reputation, and in a town as small as the Outer Banks, word got around fast on who was seen out and about together. It was best to just stay away from him.

Of course, that was mostly your parents' bias driving your actions. They had high hopes for you and your future, dreams of fulfilling things they weren't able to. It was exhausting, but you stuck with it. You did exactly what they wanted when they wanted, and how they wanted for over 10 years, and you were miserable.

You thought, hoped, even prayed sometimes that you’d be able to escape the island, escape your parents’ reach, that hopefully with success you’d be able to move on. Until suddenly, they realized, you weren’t as successful as they wanted. You weren’t personable enough or weren’t as polished as they wanted.

And slowly you started to fall from grace. Your younger sister, however, royalty. She was perfect. Perfect grades, perfect social skills, perfect looks. How could you measure up? And with that, you went from the family's hope to the family's disappointment in six short months, and that way out you were chasing slowly began to fade from view.

Rafe was intimately familiar with what it felt to be the family disappointment. He’d been living it for years. It wasn’t hard to tell a kindred spirit when you saw him frequently pushed out of multiple conversations with his dad’s business partners, and his achievements disregarded for his sister’s seemingly more impressive ones.

“Yes, our Sarah plays volleyball and dances, and has kept up a 4.0 GPA.”

Or, “Sarah’s gotten several college offers including Duke, but she loves the idea of keeping Chapel Hill in the family.”

It was nauseating, to say the least.

At this point, you’d avoided him so long that you weren’t sure how to start the conversation. You desperately needed someone who understood, someone who could help you cope with it. The best bet, you figured, was Midsummers. So, you waited for him to be by himself, extra drink in your hand, and strolled over as casually as possible before offering it to him wordlessly.

He gave you a confused look and glanced around, eyebrows furrowed, “We’re underaged, you know?”

Rolling your eyes, you pushed it into his hand, “When has that ever stopped either of us?”

And he made eye contact with you again before taking it with a huffed laugh, “Fair.”

You clinked your glass lightly with his, “To being the family disappointment.”

That one got a louder laugh out of him, and he clinked his with yours again, “To never living up to impossible standards.”

With that, you were inseparable.

Heaven only knows where you’ve been; but I don’t really need to know; I know where you’re gonna go

You had a job bartending on the mainland while you went to school. After finding out Rafe still worked for his dad, you urged him to quit and find another job. You knew the bar you worked for was always looking for bouncers, so you encouraged him to apply. And he got the job.

The two of you started working together and even studying together on your nights off. It didn’t really improve your grades, but it made studying way more enjoyable. Over time you learned his coffee order, his favorite genre of focus music, and his favorite study location.

Unbeknownst to either of you, you’d been running in circles near each other, never quite crossing paths. Taking the same classes but never at the same time, and living in the same apartment building but on different floors. You liked to believe it was meant to be, but you weren’t sure how he felt or how to broach that topic.

It had been a long day, and you’d texted Rafe that you weren’t sure you were going to show up for your usual study session. But after throwing yourself a pity party alone in your apartment, you realized you wanted to see him.

With a heavy sigh, you dropped your bag on the floor and slumped into a chair across from him. Rafe looked up, startled, and winced at your facial expression before sliding his coffee across the table to you. You took a sip gratefully as he stood, “I’ll go get another one.”

By the time Rafe sat back down, your exhaustion had turned to anger, and you twisted your bracelets in an attempt to work out the burst of energy.

“What happened?”

“My mother called this afternoon to discuss dinner. Apparently, they’re fed up with me not finding a suitable man to bring ‘honor to the family’ or some archaic bullshit, so they’re setting me up with a family friend.”

Rafe played with his cup for a few seconds before looking up at you, “I’ll go with you, as a buffer and as a date.”

Your heart rate doubled, and you knew it had nothing to do with the caffeine, "As a real date or as something to make my parents mad?"

“I was hoping a real date,” Rafe told you softly.

Clinking your cup with his, you smiled at him widely, “To disappointment squared and to finally finding someone who understands.”

Rafe laughed, “I don’t know where you’ve been all these years, but I’m glad you’re here now.”

On my heart, where you’re resting your head; and you look so beautiful; it’s like you were an angel

Rafe’s lease expired before yours did, about a year after you got together, so you extended yours and added him. You’d never had a roommate before, and you were nervous, but Rafe was respectful of your space and the extra presence was actually comforting instead of stifling like you worried it might be.

You'd never really been a touchy person either, normally like your personal space, but Rafe seemed to be the exception. He really liked to cuddle, and you loved to indulge him. Whether it be in bed or just on the couch after a long day. His heartbeat was calming to you, and listening to it reminded you that you weren't alone anymore.

One night he told you he liked being able to hold you and bring you comfort, that it made him feel useful for once in his life. Ward spent most of his teenage years convincing Rafe that he was good for nothing, he liked having a purpose.

You joked you only kept him around to have a permanent date to events, and he always laughed. But while that was a perk, he quelled the loneliness that had taken root in your chest without you realizing. One night, lying in bed, he brought up the one event you actually looked forward to, "Midsummers is coming up in a few weeks, you still up to going?"

“I love Midsummers, you know that.”

He grimaced, “One year you’ll say no, I guarantee.”

“Dressing up and drinking while laughing at the rest of our ‘peers’ is a great time, bub, and you know it.”

You weren’t sure he realized, but he was rubbing his thumb repeatedly over your ring finger as he spoke, “I plead the fifth.”

Under heavy skies in the rain; you’re dancing in your bare feet; just like we’re in a movie

One October your classes got canceled because of a hurricane. The two of you slept in and ate brunch and basked in a relaxed atmosphere. It wasn't too cold outside yet, and you really wanted to go out into the rain.

“Come on, Rafe, it’ll be fun to finally feel something.”

He rolled his eyes and fought a smile, “Sweetheart, I can promise you, standing outside in a hurricane will not help me ‘feel something’ like you think it will.”

You pouted, but he wouldn’t budge, “Fine, I’ll go and you can watch. Tell my sister I love her if I get struck by lightning.”

“I’ll bring you a towel,” he said, walking away to dig one of your beach towels out of the cabinet they were stored in, and you skipped out of the apartment to go up to the roof. Technically you weren’t supposed to be up there, but you and Rafe had jimmied the door months ago so you could smoke weed together in peace.

When you got outside, it was raining pretty hard, but the bulk of the hurricane still hadn’t hit, so the weather was relatively tame compared to what was coming. Unfortunately, it was too loud to hear any music, so you just hummed some songs and spun around a few times before sitting down in the middle of the roof and tilted your head up to face the sky.

Your eyes were shut, so you didn’t realize Rafe had actually joined you until he nudged your shoulder. With a little yelp, you shoved him lightly, heart beating fast at the surprise.

“Thought you didn’t want to stand in the hurricane.”

“Well, I figured this might be a once in a lifetime thing, so I might as well join you.”

The two of you were yelling to be heard over the pounding rain, and he stood suddenly, holding out his hand for you to take. Confused, you let him pull you up and into his chest.

“What are you doing?”

“Dance with me?”

Smiling widely, you nodded eagerly and began swaying with him as he softly sang Singing in the Rain like the nerd he secretly was. The two of you must’ve looked a sight, totally soaked and barefoot, dancing poorly to nonexistent music, but the moment was perfect, and you wouldn’t change it for anything.

Grab my hand and we’re chasing the train; catch you looking back at me; running through a cloud of steam

You and Rafe were running late. This was not unusual, he barely wanted to go to events you knew the two of you were obligated to attend, and he did his absolute best to make the two of you miss them. Sarah's graduation party was no exception.

“Babe, please, just wear the tie, we’re going to miss the last ferry if you don’t hurry.”

He groaned loudly, like a child, and held the tie out to you, “You do it, I cannot.” Which was bullshit, but whatever. You rolled your eyes and looped it around his neck, doing it up gently and quickly.

Tightening it, you patted his chest, “Let’s go, bub.”

Rafe normally drove the two of you everywhere, and he took his time, slowing down at yellow lights, probably infuriating the people behind him. You spent the entire drive glaring at him, but he didn’t care even a little bit.

You were out of the car and running to the ticket stand before Rafe even finished parking, much to his chagrin. He saw you glancing back at him, to make sure he was following, and he was, just much slower than you would’ve liked.

The ticket booth attendant was not amused at your last-minute buy but reluctantly gave you the tickets as you waited impatiently for Rafe to catch up to you.

“Slow down, sweetheart, the ferry isn’t going anywhere.”

You gave him your most unimpressed look, “You and I both know the ferry waits for no one, now come. on.”

Rafe continued to drag his feet, but you pulled him behind you onto the ferry just as the ramp started to lift. Once he realized he’d lost, he caught up to you and wrapped an arm around your shoulders, “I don’t know why we have to go to this stupid party.”

“It’s your sister’s high school graduation, it only happens once.”

“I don’t like my sister, hell, you don’t like my sister,” he countered.

Which wasn’t entirely true, you didn’t like that Sarah never stood up for Rafe, but you didn’t dislike the girl completely. You shoved his shoulder lightly, “I don’t dislike her, I just dislike some things about her.”

He pressed a kiss to your temple as the ferry started moving. The two of you were going to be late anyway, catching the last possible ferry. The party was probably already in full swing, so you weren’t going to have to stay too long.

“You got the card?” he asked out of the blue, suddenly remembering he was supposed to remind you to get it before you left, and you nodded, showing it to him in your bag.

“We agreed $75 right?” you asked, trying to remember how much you’d put in it.

Rafe rolled his eyes, “Yeah, even though she doesn’t need our money.”

“It’s nice,” you reminded him, though deep down, you agreed.

Rafe had been cut off about 7 months into your relationship as soon as he quit working for Ward, and Sarah’s share doubled despite not doing much to contribute. It was a huge sore spot for Rafe. The ferry ride was shorter than either of you really wanted, and too soon it was docking.

“Can you order an Uber, bub?” you asked as the two of you stepped onto the dock.

He held out his hand for you to take, “Sure thing.”

The two of you stood off to the side and you squeezed his hand a few times to get his attention, “Hey, I know you hate going to these things, but I don’t want you to be totally ostracized from your family and maybe regret it one day.”

He stared down at you, a small smile tugging at his lips as steam billowed around the two of you as the ferry prepared to leave back to the mainland for the last time. Unexpectedly, Rafe leaned down and pressed a firm kiss to your lips, "I know. You’re way too thoughtful for me.”

You laughed softly, “I just care about you.”

You can have the best of me baby now; and I will give you anything; can you feel this energy? Take it

Finals week was a bitch. It always was, but the two of you found gearing up for your last ever finals week even harder than usual. Senioritis, if you could even call it that in college, was hitting hard. Both of you had internships lined up in Memphis, and taking tests was the least of both of your concerns.

Rafe was mostly worried about finding a place to live in such short notice that he didn’t even have time to worry about economics or accounting. You, on the other hand, were stressed about both. One afternoon, the Wednesday before finals, he found you in the kitchen, sitting on the floor, freaking out.

He squatted down and gently ran his fingers through your hair a few times, “What’s going on, sweetheart?”

“What if I fail and then they don’t want me at the firm anymore? What would I even do? Like I’d move with you but I don’t want to be a housewife, I refuse to be like my mother.”

Rafe clucked his tongue and grabbed your chin, “You’re so smart, the smartest person I know. There’s no way you’re going to fail your finals. And even if the impossible happens, and you do, they’d be so stupid to let you go over it.”

“You have to say that, you’re my boyfriend.”

He let go of your chin and picked up your fist instead, massaging it until you unclenched and he could intertwine his fingers with yours. After gently rubbing your ring finger, something he’d taken to doing all the time, he spoke, “Maybe so, but my faith in you isn’t unfounded. I’ve seen you do some really impressive shit over the years and I am so proud of you. Like you got a job without throwing your name around, based only on your merit.”

“You did too,” you mumbled, smiling at him softly.

“Hell yes I did, and we’re going to be there together soon. Finals week is just a tiny blip and we’re going to get through it and then we never have to worry about that again.”

“How are you so chill right now?”

Rafe chuckled, “I don’t know, I guess I’m just ready to be done and I’m already over it. I just want to start our future together now. But for now, thinking about it is enough.”

“That’s the kind of energy I need,” you grumbled, sagging into his embrace, finally dropping all tension from your body.

He pulled you in tighter, “Take some, sweetheart, I have plenty.”

“I don’t think that’s how it works.”

You felt him shrug and the smile he pressed into the top of your head, “Maybe not, but I’d give you anything, you know that right?”

And finally, to his relief, you smiled, “Yeah, I know.”

“Good.”

Can I stop the flow of time; can I swim in your divine; cause I don’t think I’d ever leave this place

The night before your planned move to Memphis, Rafe and you ordered Cook Out and ate on the living room floor. The nostalgia was overwhelming as you realized that the two of you were leaving your first real home together.

Once you both finished eating, you buried your face in Rafe’s chest, the feelings overwhelming you with nothing else to focus on. He didn’t say anything, basking in the comfortable silence with you, lost in memories of his own.

The two of you sat there for what felt like eons but was really only an hour before he stood, holding a hand out to help you up. You took it gratefully, and he led you into your room to sleep for the last time. The two of you got ready for bed, side by side, for the last time in that bathroom and tears periodically pricked your eyes.

Still, in silence, the two of you laid in bed, cuddled together. His thumb stroked your shoulder, pushed under the sleeve of your t-shirt, and you played with the hem of his shorts offhandedly. It was a bit of a surprise when he finally spoke, jolting the two of you out of the comfortable silence.

“Marry me,” he said.

Caught off guard, you pushed yourself into a sitting position, hand on his chest, “What?”

“I can’t picture spending the rest of my life with anyone else, I feel like time stops when I’m with you. It’s so addicting, and now we’re out of school and we have jobs, so, marry me.”

You couldn't stop the tears this time, "Yeah, of course, of course, I'll marry you."

He grinned, maybe the widest you’ve ever seen, and sat up, flicking the bedside lamp on and started digging through his nightstand. After about 30 seconds, you holding your breath the whole time, he pulled out a jewelry box and opened it, revealing the prettiest ring you’d ever seen.

“Damn, Rafe, this is nice as fuck.”

With a loud laugh, he slid it on your finger and pulled your hand up to press a kiss to your knuckles, "Only the best for you, sweetheart."

You stared down at it for a while before glancing back up at him, only to find him looking at you already, a soft smile on his face. With a blush, you squeezed his hand, "I know we have to move on, but I'm going to miss this place."

“I will too, this was our home for so long.”

You almost wanted to cringe at your next words, cheesy as they sounded, “I think I’ll be leaving a small part of me behind, a part that never wants to leave this place.”

He pressed one last kiss to your knuckles before laying back down, “Me too.”

Oh, turn the lights, turn the lights down low; yeah, now I’m feeling you breathing slow

The first month sleeping in your new apartment, in your new bed, was hard to adjust to for you. Rafe seemed to have no issue, and you spent countless nights just laying on his chest, listening to his heartbeat and moving with his deep, even breaths.

Eventually, it got easier, living farther away from your family, from the Outer Banks. Rafe helped immensely, always there with coffee in the mornings after yet another sleepless night. He wasn't really sure how to help you other than just comfort you when you were clearly distressed.

“I love you,” you whispered one night, just as his breathing evened off.

His lips quirked up briefly, “Love you too.”

‘Cause baby we’re just reckless kids; trying to find an island in the flood; oh, turn the lights, turn the lights down low

Once everything got settled, Rafe invited both of your families down for a weekend to tell them all about the engagement. Neither of you was particularly looking forward to it, both families likely to be a bit unhappy about it.

You fretted and cleaned your apartment multiple times, even though no one was actually staying there except Sarah, Wheezie, and your sister, none of which cared about the state of your apartment.

Rafe finally got fed up and pulled you down onto the couch the day they were supposed to come in before you could vacuum a third time. He rubbed your shoulders, “It’s going to be okay, even if they’re upset, there’s nothing they can do. We’re adults with jobs and lives away from them.”

You knew he was right but it didn’t really matter to you at the moment, “Right but-“

He cut you off, “No buts, let’s watch some Netflix until they get here.”

And when they did get there, it wasn’t as bad as you both thought. Maybe your parents were hiding their actual feelings to talk to you about later, but they seemed excited at face value. Wheezie was yelling and jumping up and down, and Sarah and your sister were talking loudly, trying to be heard over Wheezie. It was loud and an overwhelming whirlwind, but you were happy.

Your dad shook Rafe's hand, and Ward didn't look proud per se, but he looked less disappointed than usual, which was a huge win in your book.

You met Rafe’s eyes through the chaos surrounding the two of you and the soft smile he was giving you brought a smile to your face too.

“I love you,” he mouthed.

“Love you more,” you mouthed back.

He mock glared and shook his head, “Never,” you barely made out over the noise.

Instead of responding, you chose to blow him a kiss and then let yourself be swept into conversation with your sister.

Unbeknownst to you, his glare softened into a fond look as he kept watching you. How had he gotten so damn lucky?

Turn the lights, turn the lights down low

#rafe cameron #rafe outer banks #outer banks #rafe cameron fic #rafe obx #rafe fic #outer banks fic #rafe x you #rafe x reader #college rafe

[xiaomoxu]

MLQC CN Lucien (Xu Mo) Nostalgia Date

SPOILER AHEAD!!

PART 1

MC: Sweet and sour short ribs, black pepper beef tenderloin, boiled cabbage soup are also cooked, complete!

I checked the recipes in the phone while checking the dishes in the bento box.

Recently, Xu Mo's research institute was working on a new project, and he stayed in the research institute for several days and did not go home.

I studied several new dishes in my spare time, but I never had the opportunity to try it with him.

So I took advantage of the rest day to cook and made a bento. Of course, I was able to see him out of selfishness.

I happily took a few certified photos of Bento, and marked “Professor Xu’s Love Bento” on the photos in a beloved font.

When I was about to go out, I received a text message. When I opened it, I saw that Xu Mo had sent it to an unfamiliar address.

MC: ?

Was it the wrong message? I dialed Xu Mo's phone with doubts.

Xu Mo: Did you receive the address?

MC: Yes. Where is this?

Xu Mo: This is where I am now.

Xu Mo: I guess you will come to me for lunch.

MC: ?

MC: How did you know?

Xu Mo: Because...

Xu Mo: Black pepper beef tenderloin, sweet and sour short ribs, boiled cabbage heart.

MC: ...Xu Mo! Are you working on a mind reading project?

His light laughter came from the other side.

Xu Mo: This project sounds very interesting, but you seem to forget my research field is brain science.

Xu Mo: If you want to know the answer, you can open the photo album now.

When I hung up the phone, I opened the phone album in a busy time, and a buffering icon appeared in the middle of the screen.

After a few seconds, my album was automatically updated with a photo I had never seen before.

The photo shows an exclusive courtyard with wooden log door frames and a red brick wall. At the foot of the wall, a row of old-fashioned labor tools are displayed.

In the middle of the yard is parked a 28-brand bicycle, and the simple wind of the 1970s blows across.

Under the noon sunlight, a person's shadow was reflected on the wall. I almost recognized it at a glance. It was Xu Mo.

"Ding", the phone received another text message.

Xu Mo: Do you know the answer now?

PART 2

After Xu Mo's reminder, I finally realized that there was a problem with my mobile phone last week, and I needed to verify with another cloud account.

So I temporarily borrowed Xu Mo's account. After the account was restored, I forgot to log out.

In other words, during this period, our mobile phone uses the same cloud account, and the album is also in a shared state.

MC: Isn't it...

On the way to the exclusive courtyard with my lunch box, I asked myself for my carelessness in my heart, and repeatedly checked the "stock" in the album.

Xu Mo must have seen the recipe that I kept in the photo album, and the certified lunch photos taken before the release were not spared.

I sighed, tapped my brain a little, and suddenly reacted.

If our mobile phones have been shared for more than a week, does that mean that all the photos I took this week

I quickly sent a text message to Xu Mo.

MC: Xu Mo, have you seen any other photos in the album?

Xu Mo: For example?

MC: For example, something that impresses you...

Xu Mo: Are you saying that the subject is my photo?

My fingers flicked subconsciously, and Xu Mo's new reply popped up on the screen.

Xu Mo: I forgot to say that next time you can take the photo openly, so that I can take more poses with you.

really!!

I usually secretly took photos of him reading books and doing experiments, and he saw them all!

This crafty man!

When I arrived at the alley where the small courtyard was located, I saw Xu Mo standing at the door of the courtyard waiting for me from a distance. I quickly waved to him.

MC: Xu Mo, is this research difficult? Did you not eat well again?

Xu Mo took the bento in my hand and looked at me with a concerned look, and his narrow eyes were bent.

Xu Mo: It won't be difficult.

Xu Mo: As for whether to eat well...

Xu Mo: If the standard is this bento, then I really can't claim to have a good meal.

He took my hand and led me through the door.

When I stood in the courtyard, the sense of precipitation of the years became stronger.

MC: By the way, Xu Mo, why are you in this place? Is it related to research?

Xu Mo: Well, this research project will be clinical trial here.

MC: This is actually a new research base?

Xu Mo: To be precise, it is a temporary research base.

MC: What about the others in the institute?

Xu Mo: The study will officially start tomorrow, and today we will give them a day off.

MC: It turned out to be so, but how could the research base be chosen in such a yard with a sense of age?

Xu Mo did not answer. He took me to sit down at the square table in the courtyard.

Xu Mo: Based on my understanding of you, after I answer your question, your curiosity will raise more questions.

Xu Mo: So before this heart-filled bento cools down, let's eat first.

Xu Mo: After this, I will show you a good tour.

PART 3

After supervising Xu Mo ate the lunch, he took my hand and walked into the second floor of the courtyard.

The style of the building is consistent with that of the courtyard, and it is even more difficult to tell what era I am in now.

The green leather wall is painted with "work hard" with four big red characters, and the dark gray fur has a light cement smell.

The three classic furniture pieces restore the old texture and the rest of the daily necessities also exude a strong sense of age.

Xu Mo: how do you feel?

MC: Although I haven't experienced that era, it seems to have really gone back to the past.

Xu Mo: The research institute spent a lot of time restoring this place to what it looked like in the 70s.

MC: What you said is even more curious to me. What kind of research is it that you need to construct a venue like this?

Xu Mo: It is a study on the healthy brain of the elderly. For the elderly who suffer from Alzheimer's disease, or who have hidden risks of the disease, perform clinical observations.

MC: I heard that there is no effective medicine and treatment for this disease, is it true?

Xu Mo: Well, Alzheimer's disease can be said to be a serious challenge facing modern brain science research.

Xu Mo: Even this research can only focus on early intervention before the disease, while observing the quantity and quality of brain cells.

MC: So why do you want to restore this place to the 70s?

Xu Mo: If the brain of the elderly is often stagnant, the brain will easily degenerate.

Xu Mo: Recalling the deep things in your own impression can stimulate the vitality of your brain.

Xu Mo: The most impressive experiences of the elderly who will be staying here are concentrated in the 70s, which is the most meaningful time in their lives.

Xu Mo: It is the basis of this research project to stimulate their brains in a familiar environment.

MC: Use memories to wake up the brain and prevent them from getting sick... That's it.

MC: It would be great if more people could know this method.

I looked around and suddenly a flash of inspiration.

MC: Xu Mo! Can I use the lens to record this research?

MC: This can attract more resources to invest in.

Xu Mo didn't speak, and there was a little smile in his eyes when he looked at me.

Realizing that my request was a bit abrupt, I quickly changed the subject.

MC: It doesn't matter if it can't, after all, it involves the confidentiality of research.

MC: But our memories can be recorded with the lens. In this way, when we are old, we have more memory material.

He is still silent, but the smile on his face is deeper,

MC: What's wrong? Did I say something wrong?

Xu Mo: No. If you want to shoot, I can ask the patient's family for their opinions.

Xu Mo: I think they will agree, because what you want to do is also very meaningful.

MC: I thought you would think that my ideas are too bad.

Xu Mo: I'm just happy.

Xu Mo: It turns out that you have planned so far for our future.

After visiting the entire two-story building, Xu Mo took me to the backyard again. In the middle of the backyard was a dense wisteria frame.

There was a breeze in the early autumn afternoon, and the sun overhead was also swept away most of the hot temperature.

The backyard shrouded by wisteria is concealed in a shade of shady vines swaying leisurely in the air, making it particularly cozy.

Obviously this is my first time here, but I inexplicably feel a sense of familiarity (deja vu)

Xu Mo: What are you thinking?

MC: ....It’s weird to say it, but for a moment I felt that this scene seemed familiar.

Xu Mo followed my line of sight and looked at the piece of Wisteria.

Xu Mo: On the scientific level, you have a visual experience.

Xu Mo: But I have a more romantic explanation here--maybe our soul ran out in a dream, and then we met in a yard in the 70s.

He turned his head to look at me, a deep pool of water hidden in his dark eyes.

Xu Mo: Maybe they were there and spent a peaceful life.

His tone was calm and determined, and his words fell in my heart.

MC: Xu, Xu Mo, you lied to me seriously again...

Xu Mo didn't seem to care about my dismantling, there was still light in his eyes.

Xu Mo: If you doesn't believe it, would you like to try it?

MC: try what?

Xu Mo: Had a peaceful dream in the yard of the 70s.

MC: Like our souls, spend a lifetime in a dream?

As expected, I subconsciously believed Xu Mo's words, but the instigator smiled and nodded.

Xu Mo: "Life" is a subjective term. How long a life is is up to you to feel and decide.

Xu Mo: So as long as you want, we can spend our "life" here.

Perhaps I was moved by Xu Mo's romantic theory, or because I hadn't seen him for a long time, I eagerly agreed with this proposal.

MC: Now that you are going to live a slow life in the 70s, let's be more involved!

I took out the headphones and mobile phone and placed them on the stone table in the backyard.

MC: Ask Professor Xu to confiscate these modern contraband.

Xu Mo nodded clearly, and took out the phone as I did.

Xu Mo: It seems we have to find something to seal them in the "future".

He said that he found a wooden box and put all our electronic products in it. Then turned around and reached out to me.

Xu Mo: Welcome to the seventies, little girl.

PART 4

After autumn, the weak and feeble sunlight shone into the window crookedly, like a silhouette painting for us.

And we don't have the mind to appreciate it carefully, we are devoted to the time being slowed down.

Xu Mo seemed to be prepared, and the activities proposed were endless.

He taught me how to light a kerosene lamp and took me to try an old-fashioned sewing machine.

We played the fans leisurely together and listened to the squeaking and squeaking of Suzhou Pingtan on the radio.

Time seems to have really slowed down for us, obviously we have done a lot of things, but the sun outside the window is still mild and bright

After listening to a pingtan, I eagerly looked at Xu Mo

MC: Xu Mo, what shall we do next?

Xu Mo: Is there anything you want to do?

MC: May I decide?

Xu Mo: Yep.I also want to know what you think of a slow life.

MC: um, I...Can't think of it for a while.

Xu Mo: It’s okay, just let it go. Rather than using your brain to think about what to do, it’s better to leave your feelings to your heart.

Xu Mo: The deliberate content does not necessarily conform to the meaning of slow life, the current feeling is the most important.

MC: Then sit on a recliner to enjoy the sun? But is it too plain?

Xu Mo: I think this is a good idea.

After getting Xu Mo's affirmative answer, I also fantasize about me and Xu Mo persevered in the sun together.

But soon my illusion was disillusioned, because we searched the entire yard and found that there was only one recliner.

Xu Mo and I stood under the wisteria frame in the backyard, looking at the narrow lounge chair in front of us.

MC: So... why don't you lie down for a while? Let's take a turns?

The moment I blurted it out, I felt like I had said something silly. I blushed and was about to fight for myself, but he reached out and pulled me into his arms.

Before I knew what he was going to do, Xu Mo grabbed my back waist and gently closed it, and the warm breath of each other instantly intertwined.

Before I could speak with his deep eyes, the center of gravity suddenly fell into a soft embrace.

My gaze moved down slightly, and I found that we were sitting on the recliner at this time, and my legs encircled his body without knowing when.

The large motion shook the recliner, and he shook it slightly. I couldn't find the center of gravity for a while, and subconsciously hooked Xu Mo's neck.

MC: Xu... Xu Mo?!

I struggled to stand up, but Xu Mo released the hands that were fixed to my waist, and I had to tighten the hands around his neck.

There was a warm breath between the bodies close to each other, and the scorching sensation reminded me of the hydrogen above the asphalt road in summer.

Xu Mo: It's boring to be alone in the sun, I think two people will be better.

MC: There is nothing boring in the sun...

Fearing that it would make him uncomfortable, I held on to myself, not to let myself collapse on him.

Xu Mo: You can relax a little. This chair is enough to carry the weight of the two of us.

MC: I, I am very relaxed.

Xu Mo: Is it...

I heard his low and dull noise in my ears, and I hung my head even more flushed.

He stretched out his hand, pressed the knuckles of his right hand against my chin and gently lifted it up,

The next second, a soft and light kiss fell on my lips

I instinctively closed my eyes, and in the sweet silence, I could only hear the buzzing tinnitus in my head.

Although it was only a soft kiss like a dragonfly, time seemed to slow down for this kiss. When we were separated again, it seemed that we had really spent a lifetime.

Xu Mo: I can be sure that you are really relaxed now.

When I blushed and didn't know how to react, Xu Mo's cell phone rang in the wooden box.

As if I had caught a life-saving straw, a carp stood up and rushed into the room, and his laughter came from behind.

MC: Answer the phone quickly! I'll go to the bathroom!

Xu Mo: I know, I'll go back soon.

When I came out of the bathroom, Xu Mo's call was just ended. He saw me coming and waved his mobile phone apologetically at me.

Xu Mo: Sorry. There was a problem with the preparation of the institute, and I needed to return to the institute to discuss it together.

MC: It's okay, you have been with me all afternoon. I'm already very satisfied.

After returning everything in the yard to its original position, I reluctantly took Xu Mo's arm and prepared to leave with him from here.

After spending a day with Xu Mo in the exclusive courtyard, I even felt a little bit reluctant for this place.

Perhaps after seeing through my mood, Xu Mo stopped walking.

Xu Mo: Maybe we can slow down our departure.

Following his gaze, my gaze fell on the 28 bicycle in the middle of the yard.

MC: You mean, can we ride this?

Xu is: It doesn't matter, I can find someone to send it back tomorrow.

Xu Mo stepped forward and patted the horizontal bar in front of the bicycle.

Xu Mo: But this time I still have to feel wronged by you sitting here

I couldn't help but think of our experience of cycling in Canada. At that time, I was anxious to ride the bike firmly, but my hands and feet were frizzy.

Xu Mo: Want to revisit it?

Xu Mo supported the handlebars and the body, his slender and powerful arms supported the bicycle steadily.

I nodded, holding his arm firmly into the "seat"

MC: I won't be as anxious today as I was that time.

After confirming that I was sitting firmly, Xu Mo also stepped on it. He held up his hand and wrapped me in his arms, and there was a reassuring warmth from my back.

MC: Because... I hope this road can be longer.

The white crescent moon took over the setting sun early, and the sunset was like peach-flavored soft candy.

In a busy city, Xu Mo and I were riding a two-eight bicycle that was out of place. The diagonal red stretched our shadows very long.

Accompanied by the two shadows, they swayed towards the next tomorrow.

--

#mlqc translation #mlqc xu mo #mlqc lucien #mlqc spoilers #cn server #nostalgia date #Lucien #xu mo

[uzumaki-rebellion]

“Stark’s New Intern” Chp. 15

Summary: Erik is a little weary...

Mature Audience. NSFW. Smut.

"Can't get you off my mind You're like my favorite song Just want to turn you on And work you all night long 'cause I (oh I) I just want to be your man (I just want to be your man) All around the world This goes out to girls all around the world…"

Lloyd—"Girls Around the World"

"What's going on with you? You looked frazzled, Stevens."

Tony watched Erik lumber into the conference room carrying a stack of folders. He walked around the oval conference table arranging the folders for an afternoon meeting as Tony wrapped up his morning conference with his marketing team. Erik's lackluster energy was too obvious despite the two cups of espresso he downed at the coffee shop before coming to work.

"Just tired. Been doing some all-nighters for Janine and Manuj."

It was the partial truth. He had been doing some extra work for his project manager and her right-hand man, but the truth was, he was physically worn out.

From sex.

A lot of sex.

A lot of sex with Giselle and Athena.

He did his best to alternate his fun time with them, but as healthy and seemingly replenishable his body was at his age, a young playa couldn't keep up with the demands. He was fucking both women at least twice a day. Athena in the mornings before going to work, and Giselle in the evenings when he returned to the Oakwood at night. On weekends it could be more depending on where he was on his time off while alternating between the two women. The constant dick appointments were wearing a young nigga thin. He wasn't getting enough sleep. He now found himself avoiding the women for the past three days just to get a break. He didn't want to say no to either of them because he didn't want to cut off the relationships. He literally had two fuck buddies and also Janine his immediate boss to juggle for work and there were only a few weeks left in the internship. As his father used to say to Erik when he was a child, Bast be a rock.

The women themselves knew full well that he was messing around with them both at the same time, and there was an unwritten rule that neither of them would make a big deal about it as long as there was no overlap. Erik kept the trysts discreet, but sometimes there was tension when they all had to be in the same space for intern meetings and social gatherings conducted by Tony. During those times, Erik made himself scarce, hanging near Curtis or Maria, and often times using Valentina as a buffer since neither of the women liked her too much.

His mind was really stressing now because Tony was planning a yacht party off the coast of Malibu and all the interns were invited to celebrate the ending of the internship. That meant close contact with both women at the same time. Yikes.

"Stevens, look at me."

Erik stopped in front of Tony. The man poured Erik a glass off water from the reception table and Erik drank it down.

"You're dehydrated…I see bags under your eyes…what's going on? Janine working you too hard? Too many projects?"

"Nah…I'm good. For reals—"

"You don't look good."

Tony poured more water into his glass and Erik took his time drinking. The water eased the throbbing in his right temple. Shit, he really was dehydrated.

"Take better care of yourself."

"I will."

Erik reached into his pants pocket and pulled out a slip of paper and handed it to Tony.

"What's this?"

Tony glanced at the list of numbers.

"Bank accounts. My player's fee, remember?"

Tony had finally gotten around to offering compensation for his prowess in Poker. The man's face gave him a smirk.

"I'll have your fee deposited by the end of the day."

"Lotta zeroes, bruh, spread evenly" Erik encouraged with a smirk of his own.

Tony glanced at his watch then shoved the paper into his shirt pocket.

"The next team is ready for you, Mr. Stark."

Devika held open the conference room door.

"Do you want me to stick around?" Erik asked.

"Yeah, you can fill in for Bryan. He's out for the rest of the day. Do me a favor can you go up and bring me my touchpad and the Robbins folder from my office desk? Devika can get it for you."

A new department swept in past Devika, and Erik followed her out toward the bank of elevators on the fifth floor. Erik glanced at Devika's clothes. She dressed spiffily every day, but today the drip was real, and Erik's eyes glossed over her naked legs in her teal mini-skirt and matching mini-blazer. Devika was fine, but far away fine...untouchable fine…not interested in any game Erik tried to spit but nice about it fine. He used to compliment her all the time about her sartorial choices when he flirted with her his first two weeks at the internship, but she looked at him like he was corny, so he kept his mouth shut. But he was always looking at her. She seemed to like it.

He appreciated the working relationship he had with her. She was always looking out for him, making sure he ate during the day and forcing him to leave the building when he lost track of time on the job.

"Are you losing weight?" she asked as they walked together.

"Maybe, haven't been eating a whole lot lately."

"You look thinner in the face. I'll order you a couple of burgers for lunch."

"You always take care of me."

"Because you don't. I like you heavier, not thinner—"

"Oh, so you admit you like me?"

"You are the worst flirt, you know that, right?"

"Flirting? Moi?"

Her eyes danced across his face and he gave her some dimples. She rolled her eyes.

"Ah damn," he sighed looking past Devika's face.

Giselle.

Heading his way.

He swiped his intern card on the elevator scanner for the executive suites and thank God they opened immediately.

"Erik!"

Giselle moved faster to get to him but the doors swept closed with an easy hum and Erik leaned against the bronze elevator wall as if to make himself invisible. Devika just gave him a strange look and when they reached Tony's floor, he breathed a sigh of relief. He couldn't deal with Giselle at the moment.

Devika gave Erik access to Tony's inner office to get his touchpad and paperwork.

"I'll text you to pick up your lunch. Don't ignore it," Devika said as he headed out.

Mind occupied, Erik rounded a corner to sneak a quick chat with Curtis to ask about playing a pick-up game at the Oakwood after work, and he spotted Athena rounding another corner. He pretended not to see her even though she saw him and he hoofed it back to the elevators.

A group of people waited for rides back down, and there was no way he could wait, so Erik made a mad dash back to Tony's office.

"You forget something?" Devika asked when he swept in.

Erik grabbed for the knob of Tony's inner office door, but it was locked.

"What are you doing?"

Erik's eyes darted around, nowhere to hide…except…

He scrambled across Devika's legs as she sat in her chair and dove under her desk clutching Tony's touchpad and folder.

"Erik-?"

"Shh, you didn't see me!"

Hunched under the desk, Erik heard Athena walk in. Devika blocked his body with her legs.

"Hi Devika, is Erik in here?"

Erik tapped Devika's leg.

"Uh, no, he was here a few minutes ago. He picked up some stuff for Mr. Stark. He should be heading down to the main conference room."

"Okay. Thanks—"

"Did you need something from him?"

Erik's eyes pleaded with Devika to shut up. He could see her face from under her large heavy desk. He was lucky she didn't have the chrome and glass furniture like Tony's office.

"Nothing in particular. Just wanted to chat with him. Haven't seen him in a couple of days."

"I'll let him know you were looking for him if he comes back up."

"Thanks."

Erik closed his eyes with relief.

Devika stared down at him.

"What was all that about?"

"You don't want to know."

"You are as bad as Tony."

She reached down to help him out, but when he gripped her hand, she shoved him back down. Erik reached for her legs to keep his balance and held onto her thighs.

"Is Erik here?"

Fuck.

Giselle.

"No."

"I saw him with you, so I thought he came up here."

"Should be back down with Mr. Stark. Afternoon meeting."

"Huh…I thought he would be with his project manager."

"Not today."

"Okay, thanks."

"I'll let him know you were looking for him. He seems to be very popular today. Athena was looking for him just a second ago."

Erik's face grew tight.

"I guess he is," Giselle said.

Erik waited with bated breath, his fingers clutching Devika's thighs.

His eyes dropped down to look at his hands and he could see her legs were parted wide enough where he could see under her short skirt.

His lips curled up when he saw she had on a blue thong and it could barely cover her vulva. Part of it was wedged in her folds. Erik clutched her thighs a little harder to keep his bearings.

"Bye," Devika said.

As exhausted as he was with Giselle and Athena, there was no pussy like new pussy and Erik could not stop himself from staring. Devika had a nice fat vulva. He wanted to put his mouth on it.

"Erik?"

Her voice made him raise his eyes up. His lips parted and his fingers slid down from her naked thighs to her knees, He widened them. She pushed against him but he was stronger. She tried pulling down her skirt, but there was nothing she could pull down.

"You can come out now," she whispered.

His eyes drifted back to looking between her legs. Her buttery brown thighs looked soft and he wanted to push them back so bad.

"Erik."

She must've seen the growing lust in his eyes because her own stare took on a whole different look.

His index fingers rubbed gentle circles on her knees and he slid his hands back up her outer thighs. She didn't try to close her legs at all. He dragged his eyes back to her center.

"I can see your pussy, Devika."

He felt her legs shudder. He squeezed her thighs.

"Pretty pussy…nice fat one…"

Her saw her vulva throb.

She reached for her skirt again.

"Nah, move your hand."

She did what she was told to do.

"Pull your thong to the side, lemme see it all. I just wanna see it, Devika."

He licked his lips and his gaze drifted back up to her face.

He waited for her to either cuss him out and call HR or Tony…or pull them panties back as he asked.

Her body was responding to his touch. He could hear her breathing getting heavier.

"If you don't want to. It's cool. You just…you got me turned on right now and I'm just being blunt with it, Ma. Sexy as fuck right now. I'm under a damn desk and there's pretty pussy in my face. I'm gonna react. On God, girl, you got a nigga feeling thangs."

She chuckled breaking the tension.

Her fingers slid down under her skirt.

She was going to do it?

He felt his heart race.

"Fuck, Devika…"

Panties slid to the side he saw all of her glory. Part of her thong caught a bit of glistening natural lubricant and spread it across her inner lips. He pushed her thighs open even wider.

"Play with your pussy."

He shifted back onto his backside and felt his dick thicken watching her folds ooze fresh slick from her insides. Her short red fingernails stood out against the cozy brown of her vulva and the pink of her slit. She rubbed her swollen clit and he groaned—

-until Tony and three other men walked into the outer office.

"Hey, did Stevens make it up?"

Devika's eyes darted down to his as she slammed her legs together.

"He left a few minutes ago. A couple of interns came looking for him, so he may be caught up in something," she answered. There was no tension in her voice.

"Text him and let him know he can bring my touchpad up when he's done. Tell him to drop off that folder I asked for to Davidson's office. It's not confidential so if Davidson's gone to lunch he can leave it with his secretary."

Devika reached for her cell on her desk. Erik grabbed his cell from his back pocket and made sure it was on mute.

"Guys, is it okay if we just meet out here?" Tony said.

Fuck.

He heard the group shuffle over to Tony's outer office meeting space. Erik couldn't crawl out because they would see him. Why couldn't he meet in his inner office? He shifted under the desk as quiet as he could to keep his circulation going in his cramped legs.

The men were loud and quite comfortable and Erik could hear them getting up from time to time to use Tony's expensive Italian coffee maker. Devika's eyes met his a few times and she just shrugged at him. He'd have to wait it out and hope Tony didn't ask for him.

Devika sat in her seat, and as Tony's meeting progressed, her legs opened wider torturing Erik under the desk. She pulled her chair close bringing her fat vulva even closer. Teasing him wasn't helping him in his cramped state, so he took advantage and stroked her legs starting at her ankles and working his way up to her thighs again. She pretended to type on her laptop, but Erik knew she was actually enjoying him being trapped between her legs.

She squirmed a bit in her seat and Erik pushed back her skirt. Feeling bold, he reached up with his right hand and touched her outer lips, the clipped pubic hairs already slick. He traced his fingers up through her engorged inner labia and pinched her clit. He saw her eyes squeeze shut as she kept as quiet as a church mouse. Her legs quaked around his arms and he dipped two fingers into her wet slit. Her mouth fell open and the desire he saw in her eyes made the root of his dick throb hard in his pants.

Moving is fingers in and out of her with slow gentle thrusts, he could hear the stickiness getting louder with his manipulation. He wiggled his fingers back and forth to hit her walls and her legs bounced up and almost hit the underside of her desk. He glanced down at the bulge in his pants. They were being so reckless, and he didn't care.

"Devika, could you darken the walls please," Tony called out.

She leaned over to the side and Erik knew she was using a remote to make the glass walls of his outer office darken with a tinting fixture so no one could see what was going on inside. When she leaned back into position, Erik slipped his fingers back inside of her, digging in her a little deeper. He watched his digits work her slowly and her pussy pulsed, opening and closing around his fingers, a bit of creamy fluid spilling out when he took his fingers all the way out to play with her clit. Erik loved when a woman's pussy opened and closed with pleasure, the spasms pushing the bottom half of her vulva with light rhythmic pulses. The movement reminded Erik of a heartbeat. He wondered how it would feel around his dick. 

He whispered things to her moving his lips but not letting any sound come out. She could tell he was saying filthy things to her and her pussy and mouth reacted by both opening and closing. Erik's fingers were shiny and milky from her juices and when he poked his lips out to keep from groaning, Devika's mouth opened wider and her eyes slammed shut as he felt her pussy cum all around his fingers. The tight pulls nearly made him nut in his pants as he watched her soft wet pinkness kiss and suck his digits with hard tugs. The spasm petered out after a few minutes and Erik pulled his fingers out and licked them. She tasted good. Her pussy kept twitching and her pink slit acted like it needed his fingers back inside it again.

Devika cradled her face with her hands and he rubbed her thighs to calm her shaking legs.

Tony and company left for lunch after an hour.

Erik crawled from under the desk with cramped legs and a tight back. With the office blacked out from the outside, he sought out Devika's lips and she accepted them.

"Lock the door," he whispered in her ear.

Devika did with a wave of her hand, and he lifted her onto her desk.

Whatever fatigue he felt from fucking Athena and Giselle dissipated the moment Devika took him raw, hot, and oh so ready.

Chapter 16 HERE.

###

Tag List:

@fd-writes​ @soufcakmistress  @cherrystainedlipsbaby @tclaybon  @thadelightfulone

@allhailqueennel @bartierbakarimobisson @cpwtwot @shookmcgookqueen @yoyolovesbucky

@raysunshine78 @the-illllest @terrablaze514  @l-auteuse @amirra88 @jimizwidow @janelledarling

@chaneajoyyy @sweetestdream92 @purple-apricots @blackpinup22 @hennessystevens-udaku

@scrumptiouslytenaciouscrusade @bugngiz @stariamrry  @honeytoffee @meilintheempressofdreams

@tyees @eye-raq @writerbee-ffs @chocolatedream30 @childishgambinaa @mygirlrenee​ @nahimjustfeelingit-writes​

#stark's new intern #killmonger fanfiction #tony stark #marvel cinematic universe #black panther fanfiction #erik stevens #n'jadaka

[creativeskullcreations]

Chapter 10: A Real Guilty Feeling

Hey everybody, here's chapter 10! But, unfortunately, it'll be the last chapter you see for a while. I need to take a break from writing for a while, do something else and recharge a bit. Maybe also knock out some drawings too while I'm at it.

Current timeline is looking like this: Couple of weeks without writing, and then maybe build up a bit of a buffer of chapters for <i>Outside</i>. But first, I'll be working on episode 2 of <i>Happy Times at Handeemen HQ</i>. Y'all are starting to show an interest in that, and I wanna put something new out for it.

If you want to keep updated, or even just see what I'm drawing, you can follow my art Tumblr here. Also check out my YouTube, in case of livestreams or speedpaints!(Am I plugging my own stuff too much?)

Whenever I'm ready to start posting again, I'll make sure to leave an announcement on here.

I'll see y'all later.

When Will got home, he dumped Stacy's stuff and scout on the couch. He then pointed out his locked workroom, and told her that she was never to go in there no matter what. That done, he left her to her own devices, and went off to bed. He took off his shirt and jeans, then crawled under the sheets. The last thing he did before passing out was shoot off a message to the group chat about how DnD Night was canceled until further notice.

When he woke up, far too few hours later, it was to a light weight on his chest. He stared at Scout for a moment, then picked her up and dropped her on the floor, rolling onto his front. He grabbed his phone, squinting at the too bright screen. Several messages were in the chat, and he sighed as he opened it up and scrolled to the top.

Masonary: um, excuse me?! i asked for that day off u can't cancel!!! somebody better be dead! D:<

Blooming_Stitches: Mason, shut up. We don't know what could be going on.

drWEED420: ugh, stacy. I told you to call me.

Masonary: y would stacy need to call u sam?

Masonary: is it because she hacked ur account and changed ur name again?

 drWEED420 has changed their name to DrSamIAm

DrSamIAm: no but it is something we'll going to talk abaout.

Will_and_a_Way: Stace is in the hospital for infected surgery stitches

Blooming_Stitches: I'M SORRY WHAT

Masonry: dude i was joking about som1 being dead

DrSamIAm: goddamit stacy

 DrSamIAm has left the chat We're ALL Idiots Here

Masonry: ok first of all what happened to stacy

Masonry: second who changed the chat name again?

Blooming_Stitches: lol

Will sighed, the went into his phone and pulled up his drop box, where he'd sneaked the file into a while ago. He hesitated briefly, then sent it to the chat. Stacy could be mad at him later, but he was too tired to think up a cover story for her right now.

 Will_and_a_Way posted a file in We're ALL Idiots Here

Masonry: ?

Blooming_Stitches: !

Will_and_a_Way: read that if you guys want to know what happned.

Will_and_a_Way: I'm going back to sleep now try not to kill each other

He clicked his phone off, dropping it to his mattress and letting his head fall on his pillow. Within seconds he was back asleep, completely oblivious to Scout Jumping back on his bed and climbing onto his back. She curled around the small Kirby toy, using it as a pillow as she settled back into sleep herself.

()()()

When Will woke up again, it was to a light weight in the center of his back, right below his shoulder blades. He huffed, glaring at the wall. He took a deep breath, then heaved himself up with all his strength. As predicted, Scout was catapulted off, and he quickly got out of bed, heading to the kitchen.

He made himself some toast, checking his phone on the way. The group chat was mostly just full of the various reactions from Lisa and Mason. Sammy had come back at some point, going on a rant about what Stacy hadn't told him.

He read over the various comments as he  ate, able to tell where they were in the document. Unsurprisingly, Mason finished it first, and Lisa was intent on meeting Scout. Sammy had told her Scout was nothing special, which Will privately agreed with. He finished the back reading and, seeing as nobody was online at the moment, locked his phone again. He picked up his toast and moved into his work room for the time being, deciding to get something done.

It was easy, really, for Will to get lost in his work. Dissecting the "toys" he brought home, taking them apart and recording it in his notes. He was currently working on the body of the head he'd been looking at last night. The brown, fuzzy thing was strapped securely onto the table, the front having been sawed apart and spread open.

He shifted through the innards, making careful, detailed notes about what was in there. He would compare them to the stolen blueprints later, figure out what was supposed to be in there and what wasn't. For now, though, the intention was to make a catalogue of parts.

When his phone alarm finally went off, signalling it was lunch time, he straightened up with a sigh. He pulled off his rubber gloves and, making sure the straps on the table were tight, went out to the kitchen. He made himself a simple sandwich, eating it in the kitchen as he glanced through the group chat. Mason and Lisa were on and currently discussing things, but Sam hadn't been on again since his rant.

He lurked a bit longer after he finished his sandwich, then got up to go back to work. On the way through the living room, he paused when he saw Scout sitting on the couch. She was curled up in the corner, Kirby plush on her lap as she stared at it. Even as a Puppet, he recognized the look on her face as one Stacy had often worn in the first year after her mother had died.

'Why the hell do I feel so bad for that thing?' He sighed, rubbing at his face. Making a snap decision, he went over to his DVD shelf and pulled out The Iron Giant.  He turned on the TV and player, then loaded in the movie, skipping the previews. When he reached the main menu, he selected play and dropped the remote near Scout. He then left, heading back towards the basement and his work.

Scout watched go, staring silently after him as he once again disappeared behind the locked door. She didn't even try to follow him, instead settling in to watch the show he'd turned on. With any luck, it would be violent and/or funny enough to take her mind off of things.

()()()

'That is the saddest shit I have ever seen...' She sniffed, rubbing at her frustratingly dry eyes. 'I can't believe he let himself get blown up like that. What the fuck.' She rubbed at her eyes some more, then tried to figure out how to choose a different show. When she couldn't figure it out, she threw the remote down in frustration. 'Fuck it! Where's Will?'

She Jumped from the couch, heading over to the locked door. She peered in the crack between the door and the floor, but couldn't see anything. She could hear, however, and what she heard were power tools. The sound sent a shock through her system, dredging up unwanted memories of Riley's lab. She drew back, then jumped onto a nearby table when the noise stopped. Thinking quickly, she opened the drawer that was there and tried to pretend that she had been going through it.

Will came out of the room a minute later, wiping his hands with a dirty towel. He glared when he saw what she was "doing". "What the hell are you doing? Get out of there!" It wasn't quite yelling, but his voice was definitely louder than it needed to be. Scout suppressed her fear and scoffed.

"Fine. There wasn't anything but batteries in there anyways." She slammed the drawer closed, feeling a small, petty joy in how the contents rattled around when she did. She watched him cross to his bedroom and, when he'd closed his door, opened the drawer back up in order to snoop for real.

Batteries, keys, some weird plastic clips, and other odds and ends she didn't have words for had been organized neatly in the drawer. Working quickly, she shuffled everything around even more, then shoved a handful of what was sitting on the table into the drawer. She then closed it again and sat back as innocently as she could, tilting the shade of the lamp next to her. When Will came back out, now dressed in different clothes, he sighed and fixed the shade.

She watched as he gathered up a couple of things, then came over and grabbed up a set of keys she hadn't dumped into the drawer. There was a pause, or maybe more of a hesitation, and then he scooped her up and left the house, ignoring her protests.

"Hey! Hey lemme go! H-mmph?!" He easily covered her mouth with one hand as he locked the door. He made his way to his car, not letting her go into he'd climbed in and dumped her in the passenger seat. "What was that for?!"

"Okay, here's the deal." He told her, ignoring the question. "We're going to go see Stacy. To do that, we have to go through a whole hospital full of people. And you will be quiet and good the whole time, or you will be going out the nearest window."

"We're going to go see Stacy..." That was the one thing she had really comprehended. Her Host was alive, Scout knew she had to be. If she wasn't, then the Puppet wouldn't have long to-

It didn't matter. She didn't matter, not after what almost happened. Not after what she almost did, accidentally or not.

She was jolted out of her thoughts as Will started the car, realizing belatedly that he'd continued talking to her. She hoped he hadn't noticed she wasn't paying attention. Whatever he'd been doing behind that door, she did not want to become his next patient.

In the silence of the car ride, Scout easily lost herself in the thoughts swirling through her head. The most prominent were thoughts of guilt, knowing she was to blame for this and wondering where she had gone wrong. Maybe she hadn't tried as hard as she should've to subjugate her Host back in the Studio? Or maybe she shouldn't have stayed with her after they escaped. Maybe she should have left after making sure Stacy was okay.

'Maybe I should leave anyways.'

She missed it when Will parked, only noticing when he picked her up. She let herself stay limp, though not so much out of compliance than a desire to try and keep working on the plan that had come to mind.

Vaguely, she was aware of the clean white halls Will was taking her through, as well as a nauseating smell that reminded her of Riley. A few other unclaimed Hosts like Will, though wearing clothing that, again, reminded Scout of Riley. She watched  those ones carefully, just in case. She may not like Will, but Stacy did and she didn't want something to happen to him.

Will came up to a door, opening it and peeking inside. Scout tried to look, but could only see the very end of a weird looking bed. Whatever he saw he seemed to like, as he fully entered the room, kicking the door closed behind him and approaching the bed.

"Hey Stacy." He began quietly, and Scout felt her stuffing go cold at the sight of her Host in the bed. Her normally warm brown skin was several shades paler, and there were dark circles under her eyes. She was mostly upright, though leaning heavily against the pillows behind her. The scariest thing, though, were the several tubes connecting her to various machines by the bed.

Scout felt another cold rush of guilt when she saw how Stacy's eyes lit up when she spotted them. She waited for her to say something, anything, but the Host didn't speak, instead lifting her hands to use that weird hand language.

"She can't talk right now." Will translated. "She had to be intubated and her throat still hurts. But, for some reason, she's happy to see you." He sounded annoyed by that, and Scout couldn't help but be confused. Surely Stacy knew about what she did.

'Unless she doesn't.' The Puppet realized. 'She doesn't know shit about how it works. She had no idea what I almost did to her.' Somehow, that didn't make it any better.

Against her will, she was handed over to Stacy so Will could go set down the bags. Stacy hugged her tight, and Scout couldn't help but curl up in her hold, clutching at the weird shirt she was wearing.

She ignored the humans as they talked, or rather as Will talked and Stacy did one handed signing. Instead she stared at the tubing connected to Stacy's arm, watching the clear liquid slowly drip it's way into her body. She didn't know how long she stared for, but she must've dozed off at one point because she suddenly became aware of her hair being stroked.

It couldn't have been too long, as the room was still bright, though she couldn't hear Will anymore. Instead there was a quiet, steady beeping that matched up with Stacy's heartbeat. It was relaxing, and brought up memories of when Scout had first woken up, all those years ago. Before she'd been made to take part in Riley's "tests", or found that TV. Even before she'd met her siblings and learned who and what she really was. Those first few moments when it had just been her and Daisy, enjoying the gift of life.

She almost wished she could go back to that point. Things were so much better back then, when her world consisted of Daisy's sewing room and her siblings. When she didn't have a Host to worry about accidentally killing, or her own people coming after her.

But she wouldn't have to worry about that for long. If her plan ended up working, Stacy wouldn't be in danger ever again.

#outside #fanfiction #hello puppets #stacy stein #scout #will carson

[kinghoranshit]

Tell Me A Lie (NH) Ch 4

Word Count: 2,153

Warnings: swearing, anxiety

Six hours seemed to go by in a blink of an eye, and I felt like I was going to throw up as the plane came to a stop at the terminal and I had to get off. 

I hauled my stuff with me and exited the plane, going through the terminal. I took more deep breaths, trying to control my nerves.  

I shouldn’t have been shocked to see as many people swarming around as I did, and I saw my vision blur a bit as my anxiety kicked in. So, on top of the nausea, I felt great. 

I was told to stay close to the gate, Niall and security would come get me. Hopefully it'll be soon. I felt like people were staring at me just standing there; probably had the look of being lost, which wasn’t necessarily far from the truth. I decided to take out my airpods and block out all the noises with music. The flow of it guided my heart rate to slow back to normal and I let out another heavy breath.  

It’d be okay. Everything would be great. 

There was a tap on my shoulder so I took out one of the pods, curious, and then someone whispered, “Lauren.” 

My scream caught in my throat as I turned around in a jump. My reaction after turning around was to hit him in the arm. “Niall, not funny!”

He laughed, his eyes dancing. “I thought it was.”

Both of us looked at each other, smiling, and I sighed. “It’s great to finally see you in person again.”

“You too, Kelly.” He opened his arms for a hug and I accepted it. I couldn’t help myself from snuggling my face in his neck. He was just so soft and strong at the same time; humbled and still obviously so Irish. 

“You’re not gonna cry are you?” Niall asked. 

I scoffed with a small laugh, “No.”

He pulled back and it wasn’t hard to miss the small eye roll. “Come on.” He picked up my duffel from the floor. “I’m parked in one of the closer lots. It’s still gonna be crazy gettin’ out of er’.” 

I couldn’t stop the look I gave him. 

“What?” He laughed.

“Nothing,” I mumbled, laughing a little. “I didn’t expect you to drive us.”

He furrowed his brows now, and slightly scoffed, “Why not?” 

I shrugged, then bit my lip. “You don’t seem like the best driver.” 

“I’m loads good!” 

When my eyes landed on the vehicle he started going towards, I rolled my eyes once again. Of course it was his black Range Rover. But the windows were tinted, so I assumed it was the safest option. 

When I was a few steps from reaching the door, there was a flash and I couldn’t stop myself flinching and stepping back to catch my balance. Now, voices rushed.

“Lauren Kelly, right?”

“How’s it to be dating Niall Horan?” 

“Where are you two at in your relationship?” 

“Any wedding bells yet?” 

“Have any major fights?”

The flashes continued and a tight wave flowed through my body as they closed in on me. I was confused how they managed to find us at this parking lot. It was a random spot hidden in the back. It was so under the radar. 

A hand grabbed my wrist, yanking me forward, and I was pushed into the front passenger seat. I couldn’t rip my eye sight away from the security ushering the four paps and journalists away. After they’d done that, they nodded in our direction and Niall waved to them. 

Once we were gone, Niall gave me an apologetic look. “I didn’t think they’d track us down here. But that’s what the security is for.”

I only nodded and folded my shaky hands together. I licked at my tingling lips. 

Niall reached over to take one of my hands and kissed it. “You handled that so well, Lauren.”

To be honest, my mind was still fogged. That was more intense than I thought it would be. Oh my God. 

I shook my head and cleared my throat. “I did not… I didn’t expect paps to be that intense. I’m fine.”

“I can’t promise that won’t happen again, but we’ll have security, and more than likely they’re gonna be the ones hired by Modest.”

“Perfect,” I retorted.

Today was meant to be a buffer day where he and I could hangout at his house. He had some studio work to do. I knew that my adhd and anxiety made things difficult, but that’s what the medications were for and I had my exercises. 

Tomorrow would be our day out in public at Melrose, which I’d only been there once so it would be cool to go with Niall. The paps that Modest hired were supposed to snap us randomly over there.

We waited for this guard to open these massive gates that went into a development in Beverly Hills. This was not shocking to me, yet I felt out of place as Niall pulled through them. The buildings were definitely mansions and one of them was his. Holy shit. 

“Will there be security at the house?” I asked, and that was for sure the dumbest question I’ve asked thus far. 

“Oh, no, there's security at the gate. It’s a private community.” 

I snorted. “Any of your neighbors famous?” 

He laughed now. “All of them.” 

“You fuckin posh prick,” I scoffed with a laugh.

The Range Rover came to a stop and I gasped. His house was absolutely stunning. A mixture of California and Victorian; white bricks, orange roofing, two pillars framed the front entrance, and a two door garage accented on the side. There was a lot more greenery than I anticipated as well; I wasn’t shocked by the palm trees he had out front. 

“It’s really gorgeous, Niall,” I breathed. 

He ran a hand through his tips a couple times, a laugh trailing after. “Wait until you see the inside. Less impressive.” 

I rolled my eyes and didn’t say anything else as I stepped onto the concrete of the driveway. There was no way that it wasn’t just as nice inside. I pieced together that this wasn’t the home he spent the most time at when we stepped into the entrance; he probably did prefer his London home. The simple white walls and white marbled floor accented well with the greys, blues, and gold decor and furniture. I smiled at the framed golf photos and large canvas of an Ireland flag. 

Niall cleared his throat as he rocked back and forth on his feet. “Uhm, as you can see the living room is here, bedrooms are upstairs… Feel free to pick whichever you’d like. The studio is in the basement which is where I’ll be for the remainder of today. Need anything else right now?”

I shot him a warm smile. “Thanks, Ni. I’m good for now.”

He leaned in to leave a kiss on my cheek. “Get comfy. I’ll see you later, Lauren.” 

“Will do.” I laughed under my breath. 

He disappeared down the second spiral staircase. I was back to being lost. I willed myself to go adventuring upstairs. There was an office with a sleek, glass desk that looked like it was never used; it was spotless clean though. The guest bedrooms all had their own attached bathrooms and that was where the extraness came from, otherwise it didn’t actually seem that large. Not like I’d imagined; Niall has always been a simple man. 

The guest room closest to Niall’s room practically called my name so I plopped my duffel and backpack on the floor beside the bed. I sat down on the end and fell backward onto the soft cotton. My eyes found themselves having a hard time staying open, so I closed them for a bit.

Just a little bit… 

***

I lightly groaned as I involuntarily stretched. My hand rubbed one eye as I sat up. Part of my hair had stuck to my cheek so I wiped it away behind my ear. It was clearly much later and I cursed under my breath. Despite the guilt of wasting time I could’ve used doing anything else, I did feel like a whole new person. 

It was a nice nap I had to admit. 

I grabbed the binder for Stone Cold, my pouch of pens and sticky notes, and airpods before I padded my way to the first floor. I’m sure there was a nook I could use to do some editing before we ate dinner, whenever that was. There was no way I would push Niall on a time.

Speaking of, there was a faint strumming that came from the basement. A flutter appeared in my chest hearing his sweet voice following it. This was an invasion of his privacy, even if I couldn’t make out the words. It wasn’t morally right to stand around. 

The search for a spot to settle myself was back on. I finally found a small inset seating space under a window in the kitchen area; it was a beautiful navy velvet with a couple grey pillows. It was so comfortable, more than I could ever have predicted. It was my time to get invested in my own art and let the time slip by. 

***

There was a muffled voice that didn’t match the music I was playing. As much as I wanted to keep going, I marked the paragraph I just finished and looked up. Niall’s tired, yet cheery, features filled my vision and I couldn’t stop the smile. I took out one of the airpods, which automatically paused the song, and cleared my throat. 

“How’s the writing?” 

He shrugged. “Not bad I think. Have you been here the whole time?” 

“No.” I shook my head. “I actually fell asleep for a couple hours unintentionally.” 

“The best kind of naps.” He laughed.

I bit my lip. “Yeah, and then I came here to edit. It’s a nice nook.” 

He bit into the red apple he took from the bowl placed in the middle of the island and cheesed. “That it is… What should we do for dinner? We could go out, or get something to eat here.” 

I thought about it. If we went out, I probably should change into a more put together outfit that didn’t reek of travel. That didn’t seem the slightest bit appealing to be honest. We had the rest of the trip to eat out. 

“Do you mind eating in tonight?” 

“Of course not. There’s this amazing Thai place not too far that delivers if you’ve got no objections.” 

I smirked and shook my head as I stood. “Nope, Thai sounds wonderful.” 

Within twenty minutes, the two of us were sprawled on the black suede L Couch in the living room with our own entrees and pot stickers. I used the chopsticks to bring some noodles and a piece of broccoli to my mouth. We had the first season of Stranger Things going and I tensed at the sight of Eleven using all her strength on the monster. I hadn’t realized I held my breath until that thing and she were gone.

I ate more of my Thai now, switching my focus to Niall who’d wiggled his way to lay his upper half across my lap at the beginning of the episode. I didn’t mind his weight though, it was more comforting than anything; even if the pressure on my pelvic area did emulate the sensation of needing to pee. 

“That part gets me every time,” I stated. “She’s so badass.” 

“I agree,” he remarked and reached over for another pot sticker from the coffee table. 

“Get me one?” 

He raised his brows momentarily before breaking out a smile and reached again, then handed it to me.

I cheesed. “You’re the best. This was really good. I might be addicted.” 

“Don’t even get me started,” he scoffed with a laugh. “I get it every time I’m in LA.” 

“Was the choice to eat out or in going to lead to this place no matter what?” I narrowed my eyes playfully. 

“Maybe,” he mumbled, crossing his arms, and Niall made himself more comfortable; his eyes closed even.

I shook my head. “Such a dork.” 

A small smile spread on his lips. He didn’t say anything else, and it didn’t take me long for me to catch on that he’d fallen asleep by the slow rise of his chest and soft snores. Netflix rolled into the second season of Stranger Things. I laid my head back, and found my fingers running through the tips of his hair. 

Part of me realized that this should be more weird than it is, and the other part of me found calm happiness in it. It was okay for friends to do this sort of thing; platonic snuggles were normal. 

Eventually, I drifted off too. 

Next: Ch 5 

[Masterlist]

#Niall Horan #Niall Horan fic #NH #NH fic #drama #comedy #romance #fanfiction #fic #Niall Horan fanfiction #NH fanfiction #Tell Me A Lie #Ch 4

[nekojitachan]

Update? 😻

OK, I know they’re still wrapping up andreil2019 week for the next day or two, so there should be lots of fics published then. And I want to build up a buffer again since it took me FOREVER to get ch10 done and to be quite honest, life is still a mess right now. So maybe next Sunday (21st?)?

Until then, here’s a peek at the next chapter:

Neil tucked the quilt tighter around himself while Andrewpaid the delivery guy for their dinner (Chinese), his attention mostly on thescreen of the new television installed on the opposite wall in his living room.Andrew had gone ahead and bought the damn thing (at least it wasn’t huge) thenmounted it on the wall since there wasn’t anywhere else to put it, and now Neilwas being subjected to some ridiculous show about people ‘surviving’ in a worldpopulated with the undead.

It was enough to make him wish he could drink, to long forthe eventual oblivion that followed overloaded psychic senses and awful nauseaand everything else.

It would be worth it.

“Why are these people so stupid?” he asked as Andrew placedthe bag down on the coffee table. “Don’t trust anyone, just kill them, taketheir resources and move on.” That’s what his mother had taught him, after all,was the lesson these people should have learned after the first betrayal.

Andrew gave him a bland look for a moment before he sortedthrough the bag and set Neil’s spicy Szechuan chicken noodles on the end table,near his mug of tea. “Try telling that to Renee.”

What did Walker have to do with anything? Neil frowned as hemotioned for a pair of chopsticks as well, then reached for the carton so hecould eat; he was feeling better after a couple days of rest and Walker’s weirdtea, and would be able to go back to work the next day.

“These people take too many chances and are too trusting.”

“Wouldn’t be much of a show if they acted smart and dealtwith any plotlines in a realistic way,” Andrew argued after a few bites of hissweet and sour chicken. “That and Renee claims they’re ‘showing the need for peopleto hold on to their humanity in even the darkest of times’.”

Neil’s frown deepened as he shoved aside a snow pea. “Whathumanity? No one’s going to care about such a thing when the world’s so fuckedup. Barely anyone cares about it now.”

“Ah, a realist, how precious and rare,” Andrew drawled.

Yeah, well, hard not to see humans for what they were whenone could (sort of) read their thoughts. Neil gave a bland look of his own inreturn while he nibbled on a carrot slice, and they both ate in silence afterthat.

Andrew was supposed to leave after dinner, and Neil foundhimself in no hurry for the meal to end for some reason, to wish the stupid episodeof some stupid series to be over. As much as Andrew could frustrate him, asmuch as he didn’t understand the other man (how could he hate Mary so much toexorcise her yet help Neil like this?)… there’d been a sense of comfort inhaving someone around the last couple of days, to know that he hadn’t beenalone when he’d been so weak and unable to defend himself properly.

He missed his mother so much.

Yet Mary was gone, and while Neil believed he’d come toterms with that fact… he was still grateful for Andrew’s presence (despite whatthe man had done) when he wasn’t sure if someone suspected him of being able tosee ghosts or not, when he was torn between the impulse to run until hecouldn’t move any farther and the need to not react impetuously (to not give upthe home he’d made for himself without a fight). There was something oddlygrounding to Andrew.

Even if he was still annoying as hell at times. Even whenhe’d cost Neil Mary.

(Though Neil could admit that Mary had played her own partin that, and him as well.)

The bastard had found the sweets that Neil’s family had senthim from the UK, all the Cadbury and Kinder bars, the Terry’s Chocolate Oranges(which Ally thought he’d like because of the ‘orange’ part) and so forth. Forsome reason, they kept believing he’d developed a liking for chocolate when henever had over the years, so he just stuck the stuff in a cabinet and ignoredit.

At least, he had,until a sugar fiend invaded his flat and found it, then steadily ate throughthe stash over a long weekend.

Andrew particularly enjoyed the Flake bars; he’d placed whathad to be one of the remaining few next to a bottle of soda and reached for itonce the take-away was finished. He must have noticed Neil’s disbelieving gazebecause he made a show of unwrapping the chocolate. “I’ve let Stuart know thatyou’re running low on candy. A package should be arriving soon.”

Andrew was a trulyannoying bastard. “Seriously?” Neil gritted out as he shoved the blanket awaythen himself out of the chair so he could go make more tea. “I’m sure you couldfind the stuff online somewhere, why drag me into your impending diabeticcoma?”

“Too much effort and it makes the asshole happy, sending youstuff. Oh, half the beans will be mine.”

Yes, the bastard had taken a liking to them, too; for amoment Neil had the impulse to throw the tea kettle at Andrew’s head, but withhis luck the concussion would be fatal and he’d be left with a body to clean upand a ghost to exorcise. “You were bornthrough the ass,” Neil informed him in Russian as he filled the kettle withwater instead.

“Someone seems to be feeling better.” Andrew threw out theempty take-away containers then leaned against the counter with his arms foldedacross his chest. “You still going to be here when I come back tomorrow?”

#andreil #ghost in you fic #nekojitachanfics #update eventually #got like five pages done on the new chapter already #Anonymous

[artificialqueens]

Soccer Punch (Shalaska)- Chapter 3 - Ty5000

A/N-  Hello my lovelies, I’m back again! Thank you so much for the feedback I hope y’all are enjoying this as much as I am enjoying writing it. This will be my last update before Christmas so I would just like to wish you all very Happy Holidays and I’ll see you soon. - Ty

P.S - It’s 4am, If I missed any mistakes i’m sorry.

                                 Summer Break 2014

Sharon had always loved summer break and awaited it each year with anticipation and a childlike joy. She may not be a massive fan of the increased temperature that makes her red, splotchy, sweaty and not to mention tan but there are a few things she did enjoy about the time off school. Mainly no homework or dealing with teachers or school in general was a huge plus. Being able to stay up as late as she wanted, go out as often as she liked, party as often as possible and sleep until the sun was beginning to set again were some of her favourite pass times and thankfully summer had a lot of time for her to pass.

For the first few weeks that is exactly how her summer played out, she would roll out of bed around 2pm and find herself some breakfast; usually leftover pizza or a bowl of cornflakes which she messily prepared while checking her phone for updates. Once her meal was finished and the dishes left in the sink to be worried about later she gets dressed (usually in black despite the summer heat) finds some plans to crash or mischief to cause and leaves the house not to return until the wee hours of the morning usually as the sun is rising and normally varying levels of drunk or high or both to pass out in her bed. This routine continued pretty solidly for the first three weeks of the vacation until one particularly hot Wednesday afternoon.

 Sharon lay on her bedroom floor (her bed was too warm) beside her electric fan as she mindlessly swiped through her phone becoming increasingly more frustrated by the minute at the lack of notifications. She couldn’t find one single thing to do, the party she had been planning to attend that night had been cancelled due to the host’s parents choosing to stay in town after all and all her other friends appeared to be busy, Thorgy was in Florida on vacation and Katya had been summoned to some family only barbeque. Hell, even her dealer was ignoring her!

She let out a final sigh of boredom, tossing her phone across the room lightly, it was much too hot to be doing anything anyway she decided as she made her way downstairs to grab a cold beer from the refrigerator.

It was that chain of decisions which lead Sharon to where she was now; laying on the sofa watching a soccer game. Now don’t get her wrong the choice hadn’t been completely voluntarily as there was literally nothing else on TV worth watching and she would rather watch the game than sit in silence and let her mind slowly rot in the heat.

Twenty minutes later Sharon surprised herself as she yelled out in anger as the cute twink like boy she had been following around the screen for a while now and developing a soft spot for was tackled by a much buffer burly man on the opposite team. She hadn’t been aware how invested she had become in the game at hand sure she played the game (begrudgingly) but watching a game with her own eyes was usually enough to put her to sleep yet here she was her finding herself actually enjoying the show.

Maybe that warm Wednesday afternoon would be a turning point for Miss Needles, the point in which she would completely give up her party animal ways and devote herself to a fitness journey revolving around her soccer star dream. Well it was doubtful but only time will tell.   

                                                -  -  -

Meanwhile across town Alaska’s summer was going in a completely different direction. It started out like every other summer had for the past two years, she’d wake up early; not as early as a school morning but still early enough. Then she would take a run around her neighbourhood and return home a sweaty red-faced mess for a shower and healthy well balanced breakfast of toast, eggs, avocado and a fruit smoothie which she ate while her Mom hovered nearby with a watching eye to ensure her daughter was getting the right nutrients to build her into the super star athlete she didn’t get the chance to be. Alaska’s mother was an amazing player destined for greatness until she fell pregnant with Alaska at just seventeen years of age, after she was born her Mom had tried to get back into the sport before falling pregnant again just two years later with Alaska’s sister Nebraska. She gave up her dreams after that and replaced them with motherhood so you could imagine her delight when from a young age both her children displayed an interest in the game providing a perfect canvas for her to project her hopes and dreams.

Alaska could never be more grateful for having such supportive parents who cared so much about her passions they put her through years of Soccer training from as soon as she was able to walk until she was able to join a team at the age of eight, they even petitioned the middle school to start a girls team and when she started at Castle North they got her a summer job as a soccer coach for a local camp to ensure she didn’t miss out on practice over the break.

Without them constantly pushing and encouraging her to work and train she would have broke right after the championship loss, sometimes she wonders if it’s her mothers plan to not let her think about that day to not give her a chance to crash.

It was the third Wednesday of the summer when the camp called just as she was preparing to leave for work. Something about “High temperatures, too much physical activity and keeping the kids in doors .” The basic idea of it being to inform her that she wouldn’t be needed for work that day. The news came as an unexpected but welcome surprise with the realisation that she was home alone for a few hours meaning she could actually have some time to herself for the first time that summer. Naturally she chose to spend that time the only way she knew how; watching a game and eating ice cream. (Don’t tell her mother.)

The game was going well and Alaska was really enjoying the opportunity to watch instead of play for once, that is until out of nowhere a tall burly player came rushing onto the screen kicking the ball from beneath another players feet causing him to fall over. The whistle blares alerting the offender to his warning and signalling the other team to take their penalty shot. They score.

Everything comes flooding back to her in a wave, she hears the whistle, the flash of yellow, sees Sharon’s foot connect with the ball and Jinkx diving and missing as it hits the net. She sees the flash of disappointment in her teammates eyes when she looked at them. It was all her fault, they lost the game, the championship, and their decade long winning streak because of her. She was a disgrace to the team, she’d be surprised if they even let her back next year and if they did she absolutely wouldn’t get voted captain.

Of course, this was the exact moment her mom would arrive home from work to find her daughter curled up on the sofa, tears streaming down her face and sobs wracking her small frame.

“Alaska Sweetheart what’s wrong!” She exclaimed rushing towards her daughter and reaching out to rub her shoulder supportively.

Alaska jerked away instinctively rejecting the touch, she didn’t want anymore false support. “I’m Sorry.” She whispered in between sobs as she wrapped her arms tightly around herself.

“Sorry for what?” Her mother replied. “Talk to me baby.”

 “I failed you. I failed the team. I failed myself. I failed.” Each new sentence was punctuated by a loud hiccup like sob.

It was that exact moment that her mom noticed the game playing on the TV. Oh.

“No sweetie, no no no” She reached forward again desperate to comfort her daughter. “You didn’t fail anyone. You made a mistake, they happen to the best of us. Knoxville were on top of their game this season and that had nothing to do with you, it couldn’t be helped.”

As she spoke Alaska’s sobs began to slow slightly but she didn’t look convinced.

“Come here” her mother sighed softly gesturing her daughter into a tight hug. She rubbed her back softly.

“It’s okay to be upset, but please don’t beat yourself up over it.”

“It’s hard.” Came her muffled reply

“I know. Can I teach you a trick I learned to help with when you’re feeling down?” She nodded still pressed tightly against her mom’s chest.

“Write.”

Alaska pulls away and looked up at her sceptically “Really?”

“Trust me. Grab a pen and paper and go to town don’t hold back anything. It really helps.”

Now Alaska didn’t believe her, nor had she ever written anything that wasn’t a shopping list or school work, but she was desperate to stop feeling this way. So, she thanked her Mom, apologising again much to her dismay, and made her way upstairs where she wasted no time in pulling out a pad and beginning to write and write and write, pages upon pages of thoughts and feelings and anything that came to her head.

Huh. This really did help. 

#ty5000 #soccer punch #shalaska #alaska thunderfuck #sharon needles #rpdr fanfiction #submission #high school au #lesbian au

[shawnwithlightson-blog]

The Boxer. Chapter 4

Late April 

“Soooo…” Emma started drumming her fingers on the cafe’s table.

“So….” Francesca mimicked, cutting into her crepe.

“Any plans for graduation?”

Francesca glanced up at Emma, knowing what she really meant by her question.  

“You mean a ‘party’?”

Emma sheepishly tilted her head to the right then the left before mumbling into her Irish coffee, “One might say that…”

Francesca’s mouth curved into a small smile as she was yet again remained of how well she knew her roommate.

“Sorry Em, but I’m having dinner with my family.

As expected, Emma let out a extremely unbecoming ‘boo’ that had the people sitting on either side of them, shoot them dirty looks. They sat in silence for a moment, Francesca enjoying her crepe watching Emma have some sort of internal struggle.

“Well what do you think about me throwing a little party.”

“At the apartment?” Emma hummed her response causing Francesca to roll her eyes. “I don’t understand why you insist on always using our apartment. There aren’t a shortage of clubs and bars here in the city you know.”

“What are we in high school?” Francesca’s eyebrows knitted together as she tried to understand what Emma meant by the comment. But Emma continued to say, “Those places are lame.”

“You know what I find lame? The furniture in our living being destroyed.” Francesca sarcastically remarked.

Emma glared at her. “You will never let that go will you?”

“I will not.” Francesca ate a piece of sweet strawberry , shrugging her shoulders.

“Well how about I have the party after you move out because technically I would be the sole resident.”

Emma had a point but Francesca was still worried that she was allowing a dangerous precedent to be set.

“If I am moved out and no longer your roommate, why are you asking my permission to throw a party?”

Emma tried hard to contain herself but upon hearing Francesca’s words she broke out the ever cheesy and toothy grin. She lifted her drink with the intention of toasting to something but she set the drink back down.

“Hold up. You aren’t even going to intend your own graduation party?”

“Nope.”

“That is some hardcore anti-social behavior right there.”

Francesca giggled, happily finishing her crepe. Emma continued to talk about the party, already brainstorming a playlist of ‘bangers’ and the alcohol needed.

“Jonathan and the boys like whiskey.”

‘Jonathan and the boys?’ Francesca was going to have to proceed with caution. Inhaling deeply, Francesca pushed around the last few bits of her crepe. “You going to invite Jonathan?”

“Was thinking about it. His friend got a fight but everyone knows he is going to win. Just like a buffer fight to keep him busy you know.”

Humming her response, not trusting the words that would come out of her mouth. Something was telling her Emma might be using her graduation as a front to throw a party.  But Francesca remembered that by the time of Emma’s party, she would be moved out and living quietly and peacefully on the upper east side.

All Francesca could do was smile. “I hope he wins.”

_____________________________________________________________________

May

The day was spent moving the last of her items out of the apartment. Her older brother helped carry everything out as her father stood in the living supervising the operation, taking a phone call ever other minute. Her older brother offered to take her to her parents’ place but she refused. His truck was packed and Francesca did not want to be crushed under the weight of her own personal items on her way across the island.* (island of manhattan)

Once they left, she closed her door to her room with every intention of reading, enjoying her last evening at the apartment. But she promptly fell asleep right as her body hit the bed.

Waking up, it felt as if she had slept for enternity. Her eyes immediately fell on the book, left untouched and unread just a few inches from her face. Flipping onto her back, she groaned, stretching her limbs. It was then that she heard the music. For a split second she thought it was coming from outside, maybe the people above them left their window open for all the world to hear their music. But then it hit her like a ton of bricks.

Inhaling deeply, she closed her eyes uttering a single, “Fuck.”

Her parents were expecting her and the party going on just behind her door made it completely impossible to go back to sleep. Rolling off of her bed she quickly changed into the light pink shirtdress and flats in order to look presentable when arriving home.

Lazily slinging the cross body bag across her chest, she took one last look at her now completely empty room. When she was ready, she took a moment to prepare herself before opening her bedroom door. It turned out to be a waste of time as she was still appalled at the scenes unfolding steps away from her. There was a couple making out on the couch, another not so discreetly dry humping in a doorway, red cups scattered all across the floor, and a strong scent that made her want to gag. Telling herself repeatedly to remain calm and to just keep her head down to sneak away from the debauchery.

“AW CHESSIE!” Francesca actually whimpered, knowing that she had been caught and the possibly of sneaking away unseen was now gone.

“Hey Jessie.” she shouted over the music that’s bass was so loud  she was sure the windows were rattling.

Jessie throws herself at Francesca and Francesca catches her in an awkward hug. “I am so happy you are finally done!” Her congratulations was accompanied by a cheer that a few other girls joined in on.

Francesca’s face twisted in annoyance but Jessie failed to notice, leaning in close to whisper in her ear. “Who are all these hotties?”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Francesca stated honestly. She added that Emma would know but Jessie just smirked.

“Hmm keeping them to yourself you naughty girl.”

“No, no. It’s not lik-“ she was cut off by her name yet again being shouted over the music and across the room. Francesca was surprised that she was so popular at her graduation party. Excusing herself from Jessie, promising to catch up over brunch one weekend, Francesca slipped through the crowd of people towards the kitchen.

Emma was seated atop of the counter, a small group in front of her. Emma was reaching her hands out towards her and she hated when Emma was drunk. Emma was so shameless and eager to get others to embarrass themselves that Francesca preferred to not be around her when drinks were served.

“Come here my little graduate.” Francesca was satisfied standing awkwardly off the shoulders of the guys in front of Emma. But Emma was not having it. “Come I want to introduce you to Jon’s friends.” She slurred and Francesca sighed, excusing herself as she made her way into the circle. Turning around so leaned back against the counter, beside Emma, crossing her arms across her chest.

“This is Adam, and Christopher, and this is Shawn.” Emma paused to gulp down her drink. “Shawn this is the girl you’re sharing a party with.”

Francesca turned her head to look at Shawn and she was surprised, despite the dim lighting, at how handsome he was. He was so tall that she couldn’t simply look at him but look ‘up’ to reach his dark eyes. Yet he remained silent not even offering her his hand. He just looked down at her and Francesca made a face whilst giving her attention back to Emma.

Placing her hand on Emma’s jean clad knee she shouted, “I’m going to leave I wil-“

“What?” Emma shouted with a bit more force than Francesca.

“I’m leaving !”

“No! You just got here silly billy!” Emma draped her arms over Francesca’s shoulders, wrapping them across her chest. Francesca was instantly uncomfortable and went to remove Emma’s clammy hands.

“You two should make out.” Some guy called out as he passed the circle. The boys all reacted quickly telling him to get lost, Christopher adding a hard shove for good measure.

“Would you like a drink?” Adam asked.

“No thank you. I’m on my way out.”

“But its your party!”

“Well it’s technically our party.” She states matter of factly, wagging her finger between herself and Shawn.

“Where are you headed?” Shawn inquired, taking her by surprise that he actually spoke.

“Home.”

“Do you need a ride?”

“No.” Francesca was going to add that she would be taking a cab but she thought her answer was sufficient. Quick, to the point, and a step closer to being on her way out the front door.  Shawn though keep his eyes locked on hers as he sipped his drink. She was tempted to say something perhaps a thanking for your offer or a comment about her she doesn’t support drinking and driving, but she didn’t.

“Did you win your fight?”

He smirked, nodding his head. “I did.”

“Well congratulations.”

“Em,” she began tossing Emma’s arms off of her body, “I will text you once I’m home. Saying her goodbyes to the boys, she works her way out of the circle, politely mumbling an ‘excuse me’ as she passes Shawn.

Leaving the apartment building she hailed a cab and within the next half hour was at her parents’ place. Yawning she closed her bedroom door, falling onto the tufted bench in front of her neatly made bed. Texting Emma she was safe and sound on the upper east side, Francesca was surprised when she received a reply back so quickly.

the message read:  good. 😍

#shawn mendes #shawn mendes fanfic #shawn mendes fic #shawn peter raul mendes #shawn mendes blurb #shawn mendes smut #shawn mendes x reader #shawn mendes ofc

[profeminist]

The BIG list of free Feminist / Gender / Audiobooks by Women via Audible.com

Updated 4/23/17: Here is a masterlist of feminist books and books by or about women and the LGBTQIA+ community that are available for free with a trial signup to Audible.com. As I update the list over the coming week I’ll reflect the current date at the top of the list!

Through a current promotion, you can sign up for a free trial, cancel within 30 days and you get to keep the two books forever! 

30 days of membership free, plus two free audiobooks that are yours forever.

1 credit a month after trial, good for any book regardless of price.

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Easy exchanges. Don’t love a book? Swap it for free, anytime. Seriously.

PLEASE REMEMBER: After 30 days it’s $14.95/month, so set yourself a calendar alert to cancel if you’re not interested in continuing. I don’t want anyone to get an unbudgeted $14.95 charge because they forgot to cancel!

Here’s the link: Audible Free Trial Digital Membership  

AVAILABLE AUDIOBOOKS (updated 4/23/17)

Feminist  Books

Margaret Atwood: The Handmaid’s Tale

Laura Bates: Everyday Sexism

Jessica Benett: Feminist Fight Club: An Office Survival Manual for a Sexist Workplace

Susan Brownmiller: Femininity

Annie E. Clark and Andrea L. Pino: We Believe You: Survivors of Campus Sexual Assault Speak Out

Kira Cochrane: All the Rebel Women: The Rise of the Fourth Wave of Feminism

Angela Y. Davis:  Freedom Is a Constant Struggle: Ferguson, Palestine, and the Foundations of a Movement

Kirby Dick and Amy Ziering: The Hunting Ground: The Inside Story of Sexual Assault on American College Campuses

Nora Ephron: Crazy Salad and Scribble, Scribble: Some Things About Women and Notes on Media

Nora Ephron: I Feel Bad About My Neck: And Other Thoughts On Being A Woman

Roxane Gay: Bad Feminist: Essays

Kate Harding: Asking for It: The Alarming Rise of Rape Culture - and What We Can Do About It

Jill Lepore: The Secret History of Wonder Woman

Ariel Levy: Female Chauvinist Pigs: Women and the Rise of Raunch Culture

Audre Lorde: Sister Outsider: Essays and Speeches

Catilin Moran: How to Be a Woman

Catilin Moran: How to Build a Girl  

Caitlin Moran: Moranifesto

Kate Harding: Asking for It: The Alarming Rise of Rape Culture - and What We Can Do About It

Tamara Winfrey Harris: The Sisters Are Alright: Changing the Broken Narrative of Black Women in America  

Jack Holland:  A Brief History of Misogyny: the World’s Oldest Prejudice

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie : Dear Ijeawele, or A Feminist Manifesto in Fifteen Suggestions

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: We Should All Be Feminists

Peggy Orenstein: Cinderella Ate My Daughter: Dispatches from the Front Lines of the New Girlie-Girl Culture

Peggy Orenstein: Girls & Sex: Navigating the Complicated New Landscape

Tony Porter: Breaking Out of the “Man Box”: The Next Generation of Manhood

Phoebe Robinson: You Can’t Touch My Hair: And Other Things I Still Have to Explain

Sheryl Sandberg: Lean In: Women, Work, and the Will to Lead

Sheryl Sandberg: Lean In for Graduates

Kate Schatz: Rad American Women A-Z: Rebels, Trailblazers, and Visionaries Who Shaped Our History…and Our Future!

Gloria Steinem:Moving Beyond Words: Essays on Age, Rage, Sex, Power, Money, Muscles: Breaking the Boundaries of Gender

Gloria Steinem:Outrageous Acts and Everyday Rebellions

Rebecca Traister:  All the Single Ladies: Unmarried Women and the Rise of an Independent Nation

Jessica Valenti: Full Frontal Feminism: A Young Woman’s Guide to Why Feminism Matters

Jessica Valenti: Sex Object: A Memoir

Jessica Valenti: The Purity Myth: How America’s Obsession with Virginity Is Hurting Young Women

Jessica Valenti: He’s a Stud, She’s a Slut, and 49 Other Double Standards Every Woman Should Know

Lindy West: Shrill: Notes from a Loud Woman

Naomi Wolf: The Beauty Myth: How Images of Beauty Are Used Against Women

Mary Wollstonecraft:  A Vindication of the Rights of Woman

Malala Yousafzai: I Am Malala: How One Girl Stood Up for Education and Changed the World

Andi Zeisler: We Were Feminists Once: From Riot Grrrl to CoverGirl®, the Buying and Selling of a Political Movement

LGBTQIA+ Authors

Dorothy Allison: Bastard Out of Carolina: A Novel

James Baldwin: Notes of a Native Son

Alan Cummings: Not My Father’s Son: A Memoir

Ellen DeGeneres: Seriously … I’m Kidding

Ellen DeGeneres: The Funny Thing Is …

Jennifer Finney Boylan: She’s Not There: A Life in Two Genders

Laura Jane Grace: Tranny; Confessions of Punk Rock’s Most Infamous Anarchist Sellout

Hannah Hart: Buffering: Unshared Tales of a Life Fully Loaded

Jazz Jennings: Being Jazz: My Life as a (Transgender) Teen

Janet Mock: Redefining Realness: My Path to Womanhood, Identity, Love & So Much More

Tig Notaro: I’m Just a Person

Funny Women

Samantha Bee: I Know I Am, But What Are You?

Carol Burnett: In Such Good Company: Eleven Years of Laughter, Mayhem, and Fun in the Sandbox

Carol Burnett: This Time Together: Laughter and Reflection

Ellen DeGeneres: Seriously … I’m Kidding

Felicia Day: You’re Never Weird on the Internet (Almost)

Rachel Dratch: Girl Walks into a Bar…: Comedy Calamities, Dating Disasters, and a Midlife Miracle

Tina Fey, Bossypants

Miranda Hart: Is It Just Me?

Miranda Hart: Miranda Hart’s Joke Shop

Mindy Kaling: Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns)

Mindy Kaling:  Why Not Me?

Anna Kendrick: Scrappy Little Nobody

Jessi Klein: You’ll Grow Out of It

Jane Lynch: Happy Accidents

Tig Notaro: I’m Just a Person

Amy Poehler: Yes Please

Issa Rae: The Misadventures of Awkward Black Girl

Sarah Silverman: The Bedwetter: Stories of Courage, Redemption, and Pee

Aisha Tyler: Self-Inflicted Wounds: Heartwarming Tales of Epic Humiliation

Betty White: If You Ask Me (And of Course You Won’t)

Betty White: Here We Go Again: My Life In Television

Rocking Women

Carrie Brownstein:  Hunger Makes Me a Modern Girl: A Memoir

Kim Gordon: Girl In a Band: A Memoir

Athletes & Coaches

Simone Biles: Courage to Soar: A Body in Motion, A Life in Balance

Tamika Catchings: Catch a Star: Shining through Adversity to Become a Champion

Gabrielle Douglas: Grace, Gold, and Glory My Leap of Faith

Laurie Hernandez: I Got This: To Gold and Beyond

Carli Lloyd: All Heart: My Dedication and Determination to Become One of Soccer’s Best

Pat Head Summitt: Sum It Up: A Thousand and Ninety-Eight Victories, a Couple of Irrelevant Losses, and a Life in Perspective

Abby Wambach: Forward: A Memoir

More Memoirs  

Maya Angelou: I Know Why the Caged Bird Sings

Drew Barrymore: Wildflower

Carrie Fisher: The Princess Diarist

Anne Frank: Anne Frank: The Diary of a Young Girl

Ruth Bader Ginsburg: My Own Words

Diane Guerrero: In the Country We Love: My Family Divided

Taraji P. Henson: Around the Way Girl: A Memoir

Coretta Scott King: My Life, My Love, My Legacy

Zora Neale Hurston: Dust Tracks on a Road: An Autobiography

Angie Martinez: My Voice: A Memoir

Shonda Rhimes: Year of Yes: How to Dance It Out, Stand In the Sun and Be Your Own Person

Robin Roberts: Everybody’s Got Something

Hillary Rodham Clinton: Living History

Hillary Rodham Clinton: Hard Choices

Sonia Sotomayor: My Beloved World

Gloria Steinem: My Life on the Road

Lindsey Stirling: The Only Pirate at the Party

Cheryl Strayed: Wild: From Lost to Found on the Pacific Crest Trail

Amy Tan: The Opposite of Fate: Memories of a Writing Life

Elizabeth Warren: A Fighting Chance

Elizabeth Warren: This Fight Is Our Fight: The Battle to Save America’s Middle Class

Mara Wilson: Where Am I Now? True Stories of Girlhood and Accidental Fame

Novelists & Short Story Writers

Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie: Americanah

Isabel Allende: The House of the Spirits: A Novel

Jane Austin: Pride and Prejudice

Lucia Berlin: A Manual for Cleaning Women: Selected Stories

Charlotte Bronte: Jane Eyre

Emily Bronte: Wuthering Heights

Kate Burton: A Tree Grows in Brooklyn

Octavia Butler: Parable of the Talents

Octavia Butler: Kindred

Octavia Butler: Parable of the Sower

Louise Erdrich: The Round House: A Novel

Cristina Garcia: Dreaming in Cuban

Nadia Hashimi: The Pearl That Broke Its Shell

Shirley Jackson: We Have Always Lived in the Castle

Maxine Hong Kingston: The Woman Warrior: Memoirs of a Girlhood Among Ghosts

Jhumpa Lahiri: Interpreter of Maladies

Doris Lessing: The Golden Notebook

Audre Lord: Zami: A New Spelling of My Name

Zora Neale Hurston: Their Eyes Were Watching God

Leslie Marmon Silko: Ceremony

Leslie Marmon Silko: Almanac of the Dead

Leslie Marmon Silko: Storyteller

Gloria Naylor: Women of Brewster Place

Gloria Naylor: Mama Day

Gloria Naylor: Bailey’s Café

Ann Patchett: Commonwealth

J.K. Rowling: Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them

Zadie Smith: Swing Time

Amy Tan: The Joy Luck Club

Amy Tan: The Kitchen God’s Wife

Amy Tan: The Bonesetter’s Daughter

Angie Thomas: The Hate U Give

Toni Morrison: Home: A Novel

Toni Morrison: Sula

Toni Morrison: Song of Solomon

Toni Morrison: Beloved

Toni Morrison: The Bluest Eye

Toni Morrison: Sula

Ntozake Shange: For Colored Girls Who Have Considered Suicide When the Rainbow Is Enuf

Sarah Vowell: Unfamiliar Fishes

Alice Walker: The Color Purple

Virginia Woolf: Mrs. Dalloway

Virginia Woolf: To the Lighthouse

Virginia Woolf: The Waves

Virginia Woolf: A Room of One’s Own

Non-Fiction and Political Writers

Michelle Alexander: The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness

Roxanne Dunbar-Ortiz: An Indigenous Peoples’ History of the United States: Revisioning American History

Melissa V. Harris-Perry: Sister Citizen: Shame, Stereotypes, and Black Women in America

Rachel Maddow: Drift: The Unmooring of American Military Power

Reshma Saujani: Girls Who Code: Learn to Code and Change the World

Margot Lee Shetterly: Hidden Figures: The American Dream and the Untold Story of the Black Women Mathematicians Who Helped Win the Space Race

#feminist book #feminist books #feminist audiobook #feminist #feminism #feminist audiobooks #feminist writers #feminist authors #lgbt authors #lgbt writers #lgbt #lgbtq #lgbtia+ #free book #free books #free audiobook #free audiobooks

[axolotiels]

I haven’t written anything happy in about 4 years; that being said, here’s my half of an art trade with @darknutter!

Our 2 VFD agents aren’t having a very good day. ;0

Their supervisor had given them two basic tasks, two of the most basic tasks that the organization of VFD could possibly give their agents: 1, stay away from the source of the fire, and 2, do not get attached to your partner. Kingsleigh and Auther , both caked in soot and trying to hush their breathing in a darkened alleyway, had done neither of these things.

 Earlier in the day, things had not been so bad. On the contrary, they were going quite well. Kingsleigh was working his shop in Unlisted; blending teas, making pastries in advance, tallying ingredients, the basic things one does when owning a tea shop. The sky was unusually clear, and perhaps that should have been the first sign that something was to go completely and utterly awry.

 It had also been an unusually busy business day for Kingsleigh, as more of the town's inhabitants saw fit to leave the cozy cool of their homes in favor of a stretch in the sun and a walk on the beach. The barista had just made a cup of black coffee for old Mrs. Abernathy, the lady who ran the tourist shop up the street.

 Mrs. Abernathy smiled softly at him and took her coffee, beginning to hobble back toward the shop that she ran with her husband, who had presumably remained behind to man the station. Kingsleigh wiped his forehead and put her money in the register when his eyes were drawn back toward the window.

 "Evenin', how can I h-"

 Upon looking up, he saw a figure that had an itchy looking gray scarf over their face, wore a long-coat, a trilby hat, some black goggles that reflected most of what they saw, and despite all of this, said figure still managed to look impeccably worried.

 Kingsleigh's throat went dry. He reached his hand to the outside of the shop, flipped the little hanging sign to 'closes', then jerked his head to the back of the shop. The figure nodded and scrambled into the thin alleyway beside it. The barista drug down the shutters at the front of his shop and was mostly consumed by the darkness and smell of herb blends therein.

 He unlocked the back door and wiped his hands on his apron. Without so much as a knock, the hooded figure stepped inside and started dismantling the disguise. The hat, goggles, and scarf were hurriedly yanked off and they dangled from her head; her black hair was mussed by the rather fast taking off of the headgear, and other than her eyes, most of her was still cloaked in shadow. Eyes are said to be the windows to the soul; if that old adage is true, there would have been a very worried soul indeed.

 "We have to get them moved." The figure said softly, leaning against the door.

 Kingsleigh looked surprised when in reality he was very not-surprised. "When?"

 "By tomorrow. Is Snicket still with them?"

 He nodded, suddenly feling quite ill as he tried to recall his training. "Who sent the order?"

 The figure, who had since started trying to put back her hair and to reassemble the scarf ensemble, answered uncertainly, "I don't know. It wasn't our regular supervisor."

 Kingsleigh crossed his arms. "That doesn't sound very like them."

 "No, it doesn't." The goggles were back on.

 Taking a deep breath, suddenly his eyebrows knitted together. "What were the other orders?"

 The figure stopped fiddling with her face-gear and pondered for a second. She looked at a small machine in the back corner of the shop, a thing commonly used to send and receive telegrams. "You weren't sent any instructions at all?"

 Kingsleigh held out one finger, as if this would somehow help them. He looked confused. "No… that… Auther, that wasn't our supervisor."

 She crossed her arms over her chest an huffed a bit. "I… but what if something happened to them? We have to move the Baudelaires and Snicket. Soon."

 "What were the sup's other orders?" Kingsleigh asked again, getting more anxious by the minute.

 "Move them to the east." And with that, she seemed to finally realize what the problem was. Her hand want to her forehead and she slumped against the door. "Oh my god. The east? The bloody east? The only thing east is Romulan Rough."

 Romulan Rough was a series of sharp flint cliffs that bordered the eastern side of unlisted. It kept the town from getting blown away by extreme winds and acted as a buffer, as well as helped the down's carving supply. To move the Baudelaires and Snicket there would only achieve them getting their clothes cut to bits, or perhaps get them to fall into the sea and the series of fallen flint chunks therein.

 Kingsleigh pondered a bit and asked, "Where are the Baudelaires now?"

 "Their apartment still. Why?"

 Kingsleigh lifted up the blinds of the tea shop and peered toward the rough, silent. "Maybe we uh…. Go up there to scope the place out first. Make sure that it's safe."

 Auther quit leaning on the door and the light glinted mischievously off her goggles. "Perhaps we also bring a few necessities.. After all, you never know when one might need some rope, a knife, a jar of pickles, or some arsenic laced green tea, right?"

 Kingsleigh had already begun acquiring those items and putting him into a shoulder bag while hanging his apron on the wall. "Maybe we can to without the pickles. They're a bit heavy."

 ******************************************************************************************

 The climbing itself to get to the top of Romulan Rough was not that difficult. Even the tracking part of the ascent that Auther handled was not that difficult. What was difficult, however, was climbing and not cutting themselves very badly. Kingsleigh watched the sharp edges of the bluff while trying not to touch the sharp hand holds while keeping a sharp lookout for danger. It was a very edgy afternoon overall, and with the sun on their backs, the climb was made no easier.

 Auther at least had a hat, but Kingsleigh was just trying not to accidentally fall and cut himself six ways to Sunday. "Definitely not gonna fall, nope. Not gonna fall and shred myself before tumbling into the sea and shredding myself more."

 "What?" Auther stopped, the end of her scarf billowing in the wind.

 "Nothing. Just keep looking. F-for something."

 "Whoever they were, they were wearing really big shoes." She'd seen several scuff marks and old blood along the trail they now trekked.

 Anyone who known anything about the VFD organization knows that the fires that they put out do not at all begin in the establishment that they consume. A good 9 times out of 10, the fires are started from a great distance away, and while the Romulan Rough was not too far from the seaside town itself, it was far enough from the apartment that Kingsleigh and Auther's charges and mentor lived in. One may find issue with the building being made of brick, and therefor it should not have been able to catch fire. The response to that issue is the same response to the universe where Joseph Stalin cured cancer, the answer being 'don't think about it'.

 Auther and Kingsleigh both were quite worried that whoever dared to climb the cliffs as up to no good, and especially considering their supervisor hadn't answered their inquiry for more information, one could assume that their worry was properly placed. Both of them would occasionally look to the right at one of the rickety trams that would pass by empty, wishing they could have used that to get to the top of the cliffs instead. But whoever they were following didn't use the tram, so neither would they.

 Upon reaching a markedly more flat stretch of flint, Auther stood up and looked at the cuts on her hands. "Gross. Once we're done here, you think I could pester you for a cup of rose tea?"

 Kingsleigh followed suit, looking a lot less cut up; the red on whatever footholds let him know which ones were exceedingly sharp. "Sure. Don't have any rose cakes though."

 "If I just… ate a rose."

 He looked a bit alarmed for a second. "I wouldn't recommend that, they're toxic."

 She lifted the goggles from her face and revealed her tired looking green eyes. "But boiling them in tea is fine?"

 Kingsleigh scoffed and gave her a friendly shove. "I'm not actually boiling toxic flowers. I've had more than enough of people eating flowers to last me a lifetime."

 "Michigan was weird."

"Yeah, it really was."

 They stood in silence for a few seconds before Kingsleigh decided to rummage through his shoulder bag; he drew out some rope that he figured they may need soon, as well as the thermos of green tea. Auther looked at it warily. "Didn't you put arsenic in that?"

 He frowned, opened the thermos, and squinted. "I can't remember. Best not try if I can't remember."

 "You didn't bring those nifty gadgets you made?" She said good-naturedly, and leaned against the cliff.

 Kingsleigh gulped and sheepishly put the thermos of tea that may have been mixed with arsenic (Or some poisonous substitute thereof) back into his bag. "I didn't think we'd be eating on top of Romulan Rough with our hands all cut up while we're trying to stop a fire."

 "Me neither. Then again, we never thought we'd see Lemony Snicket in person and not in an obituary, but here we are."

 The barista snorted. "I'll say; once you saw that it was actually him and not just some randy standing in the street that day, I thought the telegram would never end."

 Auther stuck out her tongue at him, a gesture that was accepted despite the fact that it was incredibly hard to see through the scarf. "What can I say? I thought he was a ghost."

 "You're a ghost."

 "Rude!"

 It was about that time that a bright light caught their eyes, being rather rude and interrupting their conversation. It wasn't being shone at them so much as  past them, but it was still seen. It came from the cliff above them and aimed at a red brick apartment block on the far side of town. The agents both froze and looked at each other before reaching the silent agreement that most agents have to make once in their careers: which one of them would have to fistfight the fire-starter.

 Without much more hesitation, Auther decided she would step up to plate. She scrambled up the side of the cliff, leaving red hand prints in her wake. Kingsleigh went around the long way and became more concerned when he heard not only scuffling, but the sound of rock crunching underfoot.

 He rounded a sharp corner and clambered up to level ground with a tangle of rope leading out of his pocket. There was a burly man who also happened to be wearing a long-coat, though this one was the color of the flint they now stood on. Unfortunately enough for Auther, he also seemed to be very good at fist-fighting. Auther had her hands up to guard her face and was hunkered down but she was also very dangerously toward the edge of the cliff. The side where the fellow in gray was standing was mostly shale but also fell back to sparse dry grass made up the top of the cliffs.

 The man in shale threw a punch; Auther blocked, but was forced back a foot. On the back of his long coat was an insignia that had been a bad idea to put there; an eye.

 Of COURSE it's one of these idiots. We thought they were all dead, but NO. One of Count Olaf's stragglers or some other moron their side of the schism just HAS to have the Baudelaire fortune. This, in reality, may or may not have been what was going on, but it was certainly going on inside Kingsleigh's head.

 He ultimately just ended up chucking a chunk of flint at the fellow, who did not appreciate it at all. The sun high in the sky glinted sharply off of something near his feet on the ground. Kingsleigh froze, calculated how cut up he would be if he followed through with his actions, and ultimately decided that a few cuts would be worth it. So he rolled forward with his hands stretched out toward the shiny thing and his chin tucked close to his shirt.

 The man in the long-coat jerked back as Auther finally landed a hit straight to the ribs, and upon noticing the theft of his object, dove for Kingsleigh instead. One side of it was yanked incredibly hard, and Kingsleigh yanked it back. Through the sunlight and the glinting and the shadow, he couldn't see the fellow's face, but what he did see resembled a hook coming out of the gray coat's sleeves. The look was short lived as one of the stranger's knees buckled  with a pop and he cried out in pain.

 Auther had reeled back and had kicked the back of his knee; that was her favorite move. It's my favorite move too, now. Kingsleigh thought passively, and he scrambled to his feet whilst trying to shove the shiny thing in her bag. He knew that shiny thing; it was the same metal and glass contraption that had started many a fires on behalf of the already besmirched name of VFD. If he never saw another one, it would be too soon.

 In a panic, Auther had yanked Kingsleigh up by the shoulder and rushed him toward the sloping side of the bluff; her hands left red smears on his shirt, but she looked none the better herself, so he ignored it for now. They made a dash for the hill and started a panicked descent.

 If one has ever gone down a set of uneven stairs or otherwise the side of a gully at high speed, one knows that unless their feet are moving as quickly as their momentum is forcing them to, that they would fall. To fall down the side of a gully would be bad enough, but to fall down the scraping sides of a flint cliff with your outfit already in tatters would dice one up finer than a blender.

 Most of the descent passed in a blur, up until the point that they noticed something else shining in the grass at the foot of Romulan Rough. It was dull at first, but it slowly grew and swelled, and they both came to a gravelly and horrified stop. Yellow tongues of fire had begun to blossom like destructive flowers in the bushes and smoke rose into the clear sky. Kingsleigh rummaged through his bag desperately, and saw a rope, a knife, a thermos, a first aid kit … and one handle of the shiny fire starting device. His heart leapt into his throat as he looked back at the top of the cliff where the figure stood holding it above his head, pointing it at the grass below the bluff.

 Auther grabbed his wrist, but didn't move forward; instead she took the hat from her head and shoved it at him. "W-we can make it if we rush. It's just starter we… we-we can clear a bunch of it before it gets going but you've gotta cover your mouth with the hat."

 He did, but noticed that she didn't seem to be moving. The fire reflected in her goggles and blood dripped slowly from her hands. She's going into shock. He thought, and gave her a quick punch to the shoulder. "You're never getting that rose tea if you don't jump." He said in a sing-song mocking voice.

 At that, they both began charging down the bluff again, growing closer and closer as the fire grew larger and larger. Embers were floating into the air on columns of smoke and ash, but they tried to focus on the actual paved path beyond it. There was a rock slightly above the rest of the slope, and as soon as they touched it, they vaulted over the now angry brush fire.

 Kingsleigh landed hard on his knees but tried to roll, a little dismayed when he was greeted with a mouthful of ashes. Eventually though, he did hit pavement, and he forced himself to his feet while wiping his mouth out on his extremely dirty sleeve. He'd have to drink 10 cups of tea to get the taste out of his mouth. Coughing and sputtering, he looked around anxiously for his partner, and when he didn't see her, he called out.

 "Auther? Auther, can you hear me?"

 A clump of brown and gray had started to crawl from off to the side, and he dashed over. "You cleared it a bit too well." He said, and winced when he saw the tremendously deep cut in her hand; she'd also landed on a rock, and just their luck it was a piece of flint as well.

 Auther's legs had been smudged with ash as well, but they had indeed cleared the fire. "We need to go, we gotta go get the Baudelaires now." She mumbled, wrapping the dangling end of her scar around her hand as quickly as possible.

 Kingsleigh spared a glance back up at the cliff, and the figure had disappeared. The fire had mostly burned away the thin brush at the foot of the cliffs, but still looked to be spreading among the underbrush. Gulping, he forced them both to hobble toward the nearest-by part of the town that was unfortunately down part of a hill. One of his knees was making a rather disconcerting popping as they wobbled, and things began to blur again.

 He didn't remember how they'd gotten into the alley. He didn't even remember sitting down. But both Agent Kingsleigh and Agent Auther was slumped behind the broad side of a dumpster, trying to catch their breath. They were both shaking and bleeding and trying to correct whatever bones they had possibly dislocated; this had all been covered in basic training, of course.

 Basic training or not, Kingsleigh was getting very concerned about the cut in Auther's hand; it had bled through the scarf, even after she had taken it completely off and looped the whole thing around her hand. She was shaking lightly as she leaned against the brick.

 "This was a really dumb idea. This was a really, really dumb idea, I am so sorry." She muttered, holding the hand close to her chest.

 "It was my idea." Kingsleigh mumbled, his head hanging as he rubbed at his knee. "If anyone's sorry, it should be me."

 "Call it quits, move the Baudelaires, and say we both fucked up?"

 He looked at her, surprised. She didn't usually swear, not unless she was feeling very under the weather. Swearing makes for lazy emphasis, and as a writer, that's a very bad thing to have.

 "You're gonna be ok." Kingsleigh said to her, and finally thought it appropriate to hand her some damp gauze from the first aid kit. He'd forgotten about it, honestly; one tends to forget things when running fifty-an-hour down a mountain made of knives.

 Even though her face was still swallowed by shadow, he could tell she was smiling, just a bit. It was a sad smile. "Don't count your chickens before they hatch." She took the gauze with her free hand and set to work on properly dressing the wound as well as it could be dressed.

 "You'll need a new scarf." He snorted, and got some more gauze to make a makeshift pressure wrap. He didn't even recall learning these things, but boy howdy if he didn't know them. He furrowed his eyebrows; why was the gauze wet?

 "The new scarf will be the least of my worries." She responded, and this time he noticed that she sounded… tired. Not energy tired but… sick tired. By the time he'd finished wrapping his knee, he squinted at her; even as far as being tired went, she was full of adrenaline before, seemed ready to fight. Now she was slumped against the wall and her eyes had closed; he couldn't even see her shaking anymore.

 "Auther?" She didn't answer.

 Panicked, he rummaged around in his bag again, only to find that the thermos had been cracked. It slowly leaked its contents into the rest of the bag, effectively stewing the rope, the knife, and the first aid kit in it. He took a quick sniff, and clamped the bag shut.

 Kingsleigh tore the wrapping from her hand despite how much he hated the sight of open wounds, and practically slung her arm over his shoulder. "N-No more rest, we have to go. We're going to get the Baudelaires, and Snicket, and we're all gonna be fine."

 She moved her feet, but only barely; they were more like dead weights than feet. Kingsleigh, despite the pain in his cuts and the pain in his knee and the nagging worry that the man with the shiny thing was still at the top of the flint cliffs and would subsequently set them both on fire, kept soldiering along and tried to find what street they were on.

 "We're all gonna be fine, yes sir. All gonna be fine, gonna talk to the Baudelaires and Snicket a-and make it to the infirmary. And gon-gonna get you some rose tea, like I promised." His voice was as fake and chipper as a retail salesman's.

 Auther had stopped responding.

 As he broke into a faster run and ignored the droplets of red that fell from her stabbed hand, his bag opened a bit and sent more of the smell at his nose. Almost in a panic, Kingsleigh snapped it shut and wrestled the thing away as they passed an empty storefront. Green tea had no true smell, but arsenic sure did.

#jinx writes #asoue #vfd #agent kingsleigh #agent auther

[scootoaster]

How to quarantine with your partner without destroying your relationship

Isolation can put a lot of strain on a relationship. (Unsplash/)

Follow all of PopSci’s COVID-19 coverage here, including travel advice, pregnancy concerns, and the latest findings on the virus itself.

The COVID-19 pandemic is keeping many Americans stuck at home, which is a good thing: Social-distancing will help flatten the curve of this disease and minimize its toll on the nation’s health care system. But this sudden surge in self-isolation means many couples are now suddenly spending an awful lot of time together—like, all the time—and that can be stressful for even the most solid partnership.

Here, we’ve gathered advice from mental health and relationship-counseling experts to help you survive all that togetherness.

Share fondness and admiration, and share it out loud

Sheila Addison, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Oakland, California, tells PopSci that she finds the Sound Relationship House especially helpful in times of stress and change. Designed by psychologists and veteran relationship specialists John and Julie Gottman, the model aims to help couples create strong friendships—bonds that provide a sound foundation for everything else.

“It’s based on their research about what makes a healthy, long-term relationship,” Addison says, “and the best foundation is a gentle, intimate friendship.”

Some of the key components of this friendship are especially important when couples are stuck together in close proximity, Addison says. The model’s emphasis on sharing fondness and appreciation is a great place to start.

“This is something we often do upfront at the beginning of the relationship,” Addison says. “We find things to compliment them on, talk up their good qualities, and let negatives slide. We do a lot of please and thank you, and that declines over time.”

But Addison encourages her clients to recommit to vocalizing positive things about one another as a way of fostering the friendship their romantic relationship sits on top of.

“I encourage them to do things like catching their partner doing something good—saying, ‘hey, thanks for unloading the dishwasher,’ or, ‘it really means a lot to me that even with everything going on, you’re making sure we have our favorite foods in the fridge,’ ” she says.

The Gottman model suggests that these small moments of fondness fill up our “emotional bank account” and make it easier to deal with day-to-day frustrations. If you feel seen and appreciated, you’ll be less stressed—and less likely to take out what stressors you do have on your partner.

Look for signs that your partner is seeking social connection

Another aspect of the Sound Relationship House that Addison hopes couples will keep in mind: the idea of turning toward bids for attention instead of turning away from them.

When your partner starts a conversation, don’t ignore them. This might sound obvious in practice, but Addison points out that when you’re stuck together all day, every day without other friends to hang out with, you might find your ice breakers turning pretty banal.

“Your partner might say something very minor, like that you’re out of eggs or they slept poorly,” Addison says. And while you don’t have to wax poetic on which eggs to buy to be a good partner, she says it’s important to acknowledge any attempt at socialization during times like these.

“It’s all about being mindful,” Addison says. “Something as simple as saying, ‘oh, you’re right, when do you think we should go grocery shopping,’ or, ‘I’m sorry to hear you didn’t sleep well, is there anything I can do to help?’ ”

Ignoring these small attempts at connection can leave you both feeling increasingly isolated and lonely. But it’s even more important not to “turn against” your partner by responding in a crabby fashion (snapping that they were the one who ate all the eggs, or that their tossing and turning kept you awake, too).

It’s not your job to be a constant source of company for your partner, no matter how much you love and support them. But there’s a big difference between suggesting they go buy eggs on their own because you could use some quiet time, and simply scowling and stomping off to another room.

Create space for yourself and allow your partner to do the same

It’s probably obvious to anyone who’s spent more than 24 hours cooped up with their loved ones, but having a few moments to yourself is important. If that only happens incidentally throughout your day—when one of you makes an emergency grocery run or the other takes a shower—you might find yourself running low on that much-needed alone time.

“Everyone needs time by themselves, and it can’t just be when you use the bathroom,” relationship coach Rachel Wright recently told the online therapy service Talkspace. “Take time to be alone, whether that is to just breathe, masturbate, text with a friend, take a nap, read … whatever. The important thing is to take time to be with you, yourself, and just you.”

Building more structure into your daily lives can help facilitate this, as well as help cut through some of the malaise of an extended quarantine. Schedule a standing FaceTime appointment with a friend so you have someone other than your partner to talk to. Plan separate workouts to give yourselves room to think. No matter how well you feel things are going and how much you miss hanging out with other people, don’t let yourself slip into the habit of spending every moment in the same space if you can help it.

Talk things out before conflicts escalate

Figuring out how to fight in a way that’s not hurtful or destructive is always important to building a healthy relationship, but Addison emphasizes that it’s particularly helpful when people are cooped up at home together. This is a stressful time—jobs are in jeopardy, people are worried about their health and that of their loved ones, and routines are more than disrupted—so even without the added pressure of constant close proximity, conflict is inevitable.

“It’s about having conflict that’s effective and doesn’t escalate,” Addison says. “It’s easy to tell people to be nicer in conflict when they’re sitting in a therapy session, and a lot harder in practice when they’re out in the world and they’re upset.”

One key strategy is to pick your battles—and understand what’s really got you worked up. Try not to start fights over easily solvable quibbles, but also don’t assume you should ignore your strong reactions to minor issues.

“Differentiate between a surface and real interest,” Elaine Yarborough, a conflict-resolution consultant, recently told WIRED. “For example, you may get angry that another has not taken out the trash. The real issue is that you feel ignored and unimportant. Express the latter.”

When conflict does come up, Addison says, all that fondness and admiration you’ve been vocalizing will come in handy.

“It provides a kind of reservoir, an emotional bank account, filled up by little moments of admiration and turning toward your partner,” she says. “If it’s filled on the regular, it becomes a buffer against conflict. If we’re already feeling good about our relationship and our partner, it’s easier to look at them and say, ‘I don’t want to clobber this person.’ ”

“It’s hard in these tough confined times to be on our best behavior,” Addison adds, “but now is the time to be really gentle and friendly.”

[chelseaflowerheaux]

(3/20) sleep 12am-7am

Kind of an experiment to see if 7h is enough

And what time I’ll pass out tonight, hopefully 10/11

Got up 7:00/7:30 to arrange flowers

Drank coffee, ate a whole greasy bagel melt about 8:00

Sat outside for a bit w/ stray cat, I really liked the cool morning air and shade

Makes me wish I had a balcony or a REAL backyard but w/e that’s for another year, another decade... and it comes at a price

I made another pot of coffee to drink on throughout the day. 

Yesterday I felt so low energy and useless

I’m realizing I’ve got to be better about monitoring my time and my dynamic energy, and staggering productivity to reflect these currents in the upcoming heat

Monday is a good planning/primping/deadhead/compost/ go to yoga or gym day, Wednesday is Misc. yard work day, Friday is take on other work and bust your ass doing it day, so as long as I take it slow doing something low energy or monotonous (weeding, seeding, potting up, mulch paths, etc) that I can kinda just zone out on and make incremental progress.

It’s really all I can hope for when temps get above 90. I’m out there 8h/day, 5days/week and I really do feel like my brain just stops working above 85

Which is maybe something I should glance at in the long run

From October to February I feel so high energy and motivated and elevated in how I think of my own profession/lifestyle, like I could really be in a position to prove myself and to share it. And that building up to one grand moment of ephemeral display is worth it, and there are ways to justify it, and what is the point of doing something if not to pursue it to its peak expression of wealth and abundance and beauty and grandeur?

In the hot months I need to be up earlier, transition into that temp rise instead of being confronted w/ midday stress first thing in my day

I get the most done physically after 4/5, I get a second wind and want to work hard till 8

But that’s also when I should be watering, harvesting, and reflecting on why I do what I do. And theoretically jumping in the nice pool (!!!), and letting the tenant mind his own business on a summer evening with his contractor bros, and going to yoga and having a social life and just generally trying to reclaim an ounce of structure in my life

And I know waking up early is THE WAY but ugh I’m so spoiled on not really having a set time I need to show up at all  

March is a weird month because I get so anxious/stressed/pessimistic about the summer the moment that temps start to rise and yet I’m also getting peak feedback on everything getting the signal to lush out or bloom. Perennials I did and did not plant have hit their full stride and hardy annuals I researched and purchased and started from seed for the first time back in the early fall are bolting up or blooming...so I feel very justified in my efforts and rewarded for the hope and anticipation and yet, I’m always just a little too pissed at the heat to stop and smell the roses. 

I’m taking the time to start my seeds today so that’s always good, just to have that vision of the future to look forward to. 

This year I think I’m more comfortable with my image of myself as Grim Reaper, as someone who takes life as much as they give it, especially with these low risk annuals from seed. Just not being sentimental about small fry that doesn’t make the cut or slow germ brassicas that are not worth the time it takes to plant them. And the financial dimension of each seed costing one cent or whatever, like its worth 50 cents sometimes to realize you don’t have enough resources for a late season plant and it needs to be composted.  

And also throwing up a big middle finger at the dry orchard and refusing to spend my time wandering around with a garden hose, wasting hours of labor on what should have been a one time irrigation design. Thinking on that real hard this summer and just seeing where I can get with it.... Spending money and getting shit done. 

Transitioning from F/W to S/S heat loving veg and just trying to get that variety and productivity without overwhelming my own time scale on planting out etc etc etc

I haven’t had a whole lot to look forward to tbh as I’ve been so engulfed in just keeping my own shit alive. I’ve enjoyed F/W: The snow peas, carrots, parsley, dill, cilantro, tragically slim lettuce and radishes and beets and caulis, choys, mizuna, broccoli for days, pea shoots, cabbage.... but most importantly all of the annual flowers. 

I went all-out on Orlaya, Calendula, Ranunculus, Anemone, Scabiosa, Foxgloves, Snapdragons, Alyssum, Violas, Linaria, Nasturtium, Malvas, Malopes, Artemesia, Eucalyptus.... both cut flower and bedding plants alike. I have used a lot of seed I’ve been meaning to get to and I’d like to take the time to plan out next year so I am seeding, potting and planting on more of a schedule focused on having the beefiest possible hardy annuals with the earliest possible display. 

Having the kitchen gardens and the flower rows on two separate irrigation types (plastic emitter drip and soaker hose) kind of proved to myself what works, what passes and what’s a complete waste of time.... and moving forward I think I’m super done with soaker hose systems and super into plastic driplines. 

I have enough of a buffer fianncially to throw money at the hardware store until I get it right, which to be fair, is how I learned to do everything else I’m good at....endless repetition and kinaesthetic learning... but I do feel a bit bad about my simple inability to be “self taught” as it pertains to doing the research and trusting it. I just don’t feel I “get” anything unless I do it on my own. I’m so stubborn, such a hands-on learner.... I’d never survive in a cubicle or a bureaucracy and that is something I’d like to downplay over time. I don’t want something as curable as technophobia to be the reason I don’t get hired for a dream job. 

I have to believe I am building towards something greater instead of wasting my time or youth. I have to believe that my aptitude in my craft far exceeds my shortcomings from never having had a “real” job or a “real” college degree.... I mean, I have both, but I struggle with the real simple shit like computer aptitude and responding to emails and crafting a professional persona that is actually primed for social interaction at all times......yikes.

I don’t know what the future holds, especially now, but I’m leaning in on this job security thing with renewed appreciation as I watch everyone stay indoors at home, gain weight, battle depression, crave sunlight, fall into pre-apocalyptic existential despair.

That’s not what I’m doing..... working 6 days a week in 90 degree heat trying to get my dang tomatoes in the ground........

[daddyhobgoblin]

The cursed FanFiction

Part one and two

The abomination I was told to post this so I did

What’s is about. This is a story compiled by multiple requests by friends and people online aquantences part three will be up at some point send requests in my asks. Essentially it’s a sally face fanfic with cameos of people like brendon urie Barney the dinosaur and kirt kobain

Enjoy the goblin king

Baby sun gazed over a burning nockfel as the charred ashes of buildings rained down onto the ground like snowflakes. Billy Joel has started the fire this time and it showed mainly the giant BJ carved into a cornfield. Well that could’ve just been for blowjob but no it ‘‘twas billy Joel.

It’s a few hours later now the narrator had to spend some time laughing at her expertly crafted blowjob joke because I the narrator have the emotional maturity of a 7 year old. Anyway this brings us to our main carecter Angelica cooper.

Angelica sat up in her hospital gown her green hair hung in wirey tendrils over her eyes. She could hear the doctors talking all she could make out was “she needs a new nose” Angelica liked her nose she thought it was fine for the time being a bit charred you know but it’s there right. No it wasn’t there was no nose left just sort of a breathe passage. (So like a nose job) she thought it couldn’t be that bad yeah she couldn’t take off the bandages but she most likely still had a nose.

The fire had taken most of her classmates friends family teachers well she had no idea who survived except she knew sal had lived because he was out the day it happened like eating bugs or something Angelica didn’t know where. Just out of town on a boat trip with his dad. Angelica wondered what one does on a boat she had been in a boat once a few months before the fire. Her uncles dog liked to swim in the bay so the whole family went out. She didn’t much like water. I mean does anybody it’s like wet and cold and shit I mean Angelica knows what’s good.

She tried her best to remember where everyone was before the fire. She was in the highschool Spanish class December 8 9.42 am. She could remember herself wearing those new pants she had bought at the pant store that fit really well. Angelica was going to miss those pants.she was on her way to the bathroom when she saw him billy Joel with a lighter hiding ilnear the library. She thought nothing of it but by the time she was washing her hands the alarm started. Imidiately the fire doors locked as she tried to run but it just got hotter until it was all just red and orange. Next thing she had remembered was waking up a few days ago in the icu.

Ok where was everyone she knew that ash and Larry had chemistry in the lab downstairs that had an exit she thought there was a fire exit in there unless they were skipping class.she had seen ash on her way up there stairs right before the fire. Panicking Angelica tried to sit back up to no avail. She tried to call out for a nurse but it just didn’t work. Just then brendon urie walked in wearing a sexy nurse costumelowkey hot.

She despately tried to communicate with the nurse before being given a slip of paper and a red sharpie.brendon watched her try her best to scribble down the question who is alive??!!. Brendon moves the bandage from over her eye and bent down level with her.”we still don’t know” she was absolutely shook how do you not know is somebody is like alive or not. Blood pressure rising she wrote down apesific names starting with sal. Still in Ohio on that lake thing coming back now Larry was in a coma ash survived but chug is still unable to be found.

She hoped she would have visitors soon firstly her dad Kurt Kobain walked in in. Thank god he was alive doing well luckily. Still not exactly what she wanted to seebut there was nobody for a long while. About a week still trying to figure out a plan of treatment.

She was supposed to get surgery in a few days she was a bit nervous but who gave a shit if she died.i mean I don’t and I’m narrating her life If she died I could go down to Taco Bell and grab a bite to eat but that’s besides the point it was the day of the surgery still with no information in her friends she was wheeled into the or with a bit of a smile on the charred remains of her face. It was a full nose transplant donor unknown. Well to Angelica at least the doctors know.

Angelica woke up after the 420 hour operation with a significantly larger nose. But whose nose is it anyway. Brendon urie came back holding a mirror”do you want to see” he asks smiling politely. Angelica nearly ripped off her bandages with excitement gazing into the mirror. It looked farmilliar somehow too farmiliar. Angelica turned to doctor urie you would know him he was in the fire too Larry Jonson.

Angelica turned into the camera in shock as the office music played in an ominous tone.”is he like alive” she stuttered.like ya man you don’t need a nose to live he still has like 69 inches of nose left” dr Urie says “oh thank god” she stutters “he can probably visit soon” doctor urie says with one of his famous welcoming smiles.

(A narrator giggle break later heh 69) Larry struts in with his skinny noodle legs that somehow supported his body. Angelica wondered how those tooth picks kept him standing she had skinny legs but at least they were portportional ok who was she kidding she was basically a cartoon at this point. He didn’t seem injured at all. “Dude what happened to you” Angelica asked questioning.” Ok so like I wasn’t in the fire itself I skipped chem and went outside because sal was FaceTiming me and I looked up from my phone and everything was on fire and I was like woah dude what type of flower is that but then I realized that the school was on fire so I walked away from that shit and walked tf home then I fell off my skateboard and broke my head open that was fun still they were like hey Angelica don’t got s nose and I was like I got a nose and here we are” Angelica responded with “bro that was like a way runon sentence but neat so you’re like homeless now too right” yeah they lived in the same apartment building do no shit honey. A beautiful moment was shared before ending part one of the god damn bullshit

Part two

Angelica butcrack woke up to the sound of Barney the dinosaurs welcoming cry “I love you you you love me we’re a happy family” they wer eup in sals uncles cabin because well the entire town burnt down so they were all staying there for awhile. Barney walked into the living room where Larry,Ash Todd,and sal were all sitting watching Pokémon on the teletubbie as a steaming plate of muffins was plopped down on the tv table in front of them. Damn Barney was hot Angelica thought he may be her best friends uncle but he was smokin. Sal picked up a blueberry muffin matching his lucious locks,also getting mucho crumbs on the carpet now who was bout to clean that shit up not me.

When Angelica bit into her muffin she felt something hard in it. Upon inspection it was a tooth like ew she passed the tooth around to everyone completely grossed out. Todd took the tooth and plugged it into Barney’s laptop and immediately it started playing megaslavania and an image popped up in screen of bob Duncan holding a map. He was able to zoom in on the map and saw that exact tooth pictured on it with the locations of other teeth around it. The gang decided to follow the teeth in Barney’s big white van with free candy scrawled across the side. Ash was in charge of directions because well she could read I don’t think anybody else was capable of reading.sal drove towards the tooth locations.

The journey would be a tretourus one being the fact that there were a bunch of dead rats on the road like big rats man like the new you’re kind. They kept on running over dead rats and Angelica insisted that they make sure it was a rat not a really hairy midget. There was only one little casualty but what do you expect when you put Mickey Mouse ears on your kid damn. They approached the location of the second of tooth.

It was the Walmart parking lot some dead guy was found in in Howell l. They left the car with the intention of both snacks and some tooth. Twards the back of the parking lot they found the tooth in the parking spot that guy died in. This one had a phone number sal put it in his pocket because he had those zip up pockets that like keep stuff safe from falling out then decided to go got snacks.

A mysterious tooth map that leads you to Walmart must mean it’s snack time.its like when your music starts buffering as some guy gets shot on your street you were like meant to know.enough about me within the elegant Walmart our heroes got a cart full of Mountain Dew ramen noodles,a couch,kiddie pool, and a pair of Gucci slides.(they ate the Gucci slides).

The gang decided to call the mysterious tooth number using Angelica’s cellphone. Once the dial tone stoped an all top farmiliar jingle played “doofensmirtz evil incorporated “ then the phone screen lit up with yet another map. The group of fuckwads collectively groaned and got back on the road in Barney’s creepy rape van.

After running over an elderly woman three birds and a baby they stopped at a red lobster along the way. Confusion plagued the gang like the bubonic plague and once again killed tons of people in the 1800s. Ash stuck her hand into the lobster tank and grabbed one out by the claw claiming herself the lobster king. She bit into the shell of the still living lobster unholy juices sloshing onto the floor. Later on the waiter gave the rest of them their food and they ate like normal people ash gnawed in the lobster for like an hour ferociously eating the poor cunt whole.

Anyway Angelica and Larry shared shared an order of nachos(do they sell nachos at red lobster ?) Angelica dipped into the salsa and something kinda whiteish appeared on the chip she put the mysterious object on her plate figuring it was like a crack rock or something but alas ‘‘twas a tooth. Ash was too busy foaming at he moulth and seizing to actually read the tooth so they asked he next best thing. Todd could read. He suggested taking ash to the hospital but they decided to read the tooth first. This tooth said “bro wtf are y’all doing at red lobster also take ash to the hospital dicktwitch signed ya boii” so they did decided to drive her to the hospital. Apparently she had eaten some of the candy in Barney’s van and got poisoned.

The gang waited in the hospital waiting room

Pondering the tooth. Someone must have been sending them. Angelica stares at the gps screen trying to watch the screen for the next closest cemetery they were probably going to need it if not for ash Angelica’s will to live would soon lie there hospital WiFi is shit and Larry tod and sal were all in the bathroom.

A few hours later a nurse cane in with news ash was going to be fine she just needs to stop eating shit off of the floor. She had contracted rabies from the candy so she should be pretty chill.in a few hours. She had been given the rabies antidote and the gang filed into the room waiting for her discharge so they could get back on the road. Ash seemed fine for now sal asked her what exactly she had eaten and apparently she had eaten a candy labeled a not so jolly rancher like bitch is you blind. Well I guess not but this narrator is tired of ash’s bull shit and honestly wished that she had died. Well she didn’t so they got back in the road vowing not to eat any more candy out of Barney’s van.

The gang returned to the van a little shaken up and went to a motel to stay for the night. They rented two rooms and sitting invitingly in the bed of the females room was another tooth. And a used hyperdermic needle (probably shouldn’t sit there) exhausted the girls flicked the needle off the bed and picked up the tooth. Ash looked into the tooth and stared at the message.”I swear to god fuckwads stop getting rabies and find me pussy” rude ash thought it wasn’t her fault she got rabies. Angelica placed the tooth in her front pocket and passed out on the bed ,rude ass teeth man.

When morning came the gang regrouped by he van and took a look at the gps again.they set out to what was most likely doofenshhmertz evil incorporated.

Hours later they arrived outside of a foreboding castle labeled Travis’s evil incorporated. They looked in shock as this part ended on a shitty cliffhanger.