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hyewka · 1 year

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*ೃ unconventional sex

synopsis. where they'd like to fuck outside of the boring ol’ bedroom.

warnings/notes. mostly sub!reader (beomgyu's a tad bit subby), no protection + creampie, mention of impregnation for soobin, dry humping, fingering, groping, bulge kink, reader's older with beomgyu (use of noona honorifics), barely proofread + varying lengths with each extract, does not include yeonkai !

★ choi soobin |

ever since the overwhelming amount of layoffs widespread throughout your entire company had started to hit your specific department, you've been coming from work exhausted, ready to slip off your torturous heels the moment you key your door open, stumbling over to your bedroom to finally throwing yourself on the comfort cushion you've been drooling about all day. usually, you'd take the time to stare up your ceiling contemplating the day, and the day before, and the day before...until your brain picks up the overly familiar rattle of the door—each time, startling you awake with the realization that you were about to drift to sleep in your work clothes, without taking a shower, makeup still very much on your face. during these days are you especially grateful with your boyfriend's struggle with the door despite living here for the past two years has persisted, because god knows soobin would've opted to let you sleep instead of waking you up.

soobin gets home, you go take a shower, then prepare yourself for bed as he enters the bathroom. its a routine you've grown accustomed to. today was no different— your brain is on its own lookout of soobin's signal entrance. when you hear it, your shut eyes immediately fly open like muscle memory, your half-nap reached its inevitable end. you don't expect the moment you sit yourself up, for soobin's large figure to come through the door, wobbly as he walks over to you and engulf you in the biggest, most suffocating, loving embrace, basically tackling your body back down on your bed. "soobin?" you whisper, his cologne overpowering your sense as you quickly realize that your body compared to his would not survive if he stayed another full minute on top of you.

"i have to go shower baby." you wheeze out, "and you're about to crush me." he nuzzles his nose in the crook of your neck as retaliation, his breathing pattern almost immediately syncing to yours. "shhh, i missed you." he whispers groggily— you sure weren't the only one drained after work.

soobin was a big baby in that sense, feeling his lips forming into a pout against your neck. the paradox of him being a broad man with a towering figure makes it a lot more endearing, and also hilarious, making you burst into a series of giggles...but not enough to let him continue crushing every bone of your body. "soobinnn," you whine trying to wriggle yourself off his hold but failing for the hundredth time, "i really, urgently, seriously need to take a shower."

after a few beats of silence, and you thinking you might just give up and fall asleep under him, he speaks up, lifting his head from the comfort of your breasts, his eyes doe-like, "let's take one together then." you think he's joking and so naturally you're sent to another fit of giggles and half laughs...until it quickly dies down with his very more-than-serious face, making your brows perk up in disbelief, eyes wide. "hey, you're acting like it's the first time!" he defensively retorts at the judgy expression spread across your face before his lips form into a comically exaggerated pout, his bottom lip sticking out, making sure to force his dimples as bonus. "plus, we'd be saving up on water bills ...you know?"

you should've known better, and really thought it over, because a shower with soobin would never end without having your cheek pressed against the shower's glass panel, steam long fogging up the view, his fingers tightly intertwined with yours, palm flat against the panel, head drooped down to your neck, sloppy purple splotches displayed all over, feather kisses on your overly fresh hickeys, his hips unrelenting, fucking your cunt closest thing to doggy style space would allow— the brutal, pornographic sound of skin slapping on skin mixture with your uncontrolled moans almost loud enough to drown out the shower head.

his length slips in and out of your cunt in a rhythmic speed, his breathing so heavy and whines so loud, getting your legs to buckle when he hits your cervix, "shit, soobin— soobin, slow down" your mewls hitch when water runs down from your face to the entrance of your mouth, choking momentarily. your head is foggy, light with ecstasy the more he drills his dick far deep inside you— eyes slowly rolling to the back of your head, feeling your energy quickly replenish. but soobin isn't done yet, oh, far from it.

you're too far gone to differentiate between water and your tears as soobin turns you around swiftly, making sure he doesn't slip out as his dick's still far buried in your warm pussy, switching positions as he pushes you to have your back against the tiled shower wall. you muster the energy to weakly shake your head, your chest heaving, "c-can't, binnie, i can't—no more-!" but soobin can't help himself, so horny over the reveal of your messy face, red with a mixture of drool and water seeping out the corner of your pink swollen lips as a result of his rough kissing. his calloused finger display over the bulge in your tummy and soobin loses the last bit of his sanity. "sorry baby," he says with much pity, his large hands positioning your wobbly legs to cling around his waist, "i just missed you...just need you—need my pretty's cunt so, so bad."

the steam enough to make both of you light headed as soobin's thrusts slower than before, thrusts calculated so surely and patient, your hand claw at his bare back every time he roughly hits a spot, hyper aware of every vein against your walls, soobin's head falling back as he groans, mouth slightly open at feeling your tight pussy clench around his dick, the running water hitting his face, hair further plastering to his forehead, his slippery hands bruising your waist the tighter his hold gets—soobin's never this rough, to the point your body jerks when his large hands start fondling your perked up tits, lips parted as he blatantly stares down.

"gonna fuck a baby into you," he breathes out crazed, his long lived fantasy of getting you full and big with his baby driving him to roughly land a passionate, wet kiss before attaching his lips to your hard nipples, sucking so earnestly while his thrusts become unrelenting, picking up, erratic as he detaches, eyes fixated on the long string of saliva connecting his mouth and your swollen nipple, oh how addicted to you he was. with every frantic thrust, your breasts bounced, slapping together, a lewd view he could stare at for hours...and hours...and hours.

you could almost pass out from the overwhelming sensation, your body long overheated, fog submerging around your feet, but soobin's degrading laugh gets you to flutter your eyes open, "fuck, these breasts would look so pretty swollen—don't you think? you'd like that right?" your lids are heavy over your eyes as you sniffle your runny nose, not exactly processing his words. "you want me to get you pregnant, don't you?"

bonus. soobin who bathes you, a sweet, caring boyfriend making sure to keep your smaller figure protected, washing your hair so in love with every aspect that makes up who you are—knowing he made the right decision with choosing you. your loving boyfriend who whispers in your ear, with your back against his chest, the bubble bath both healing and relaxing, "keep it in." the transition of his cute giggles to the low rumble of his voice near your ears has you blinking confused, yet you still find yourself nodding, completely under his trance. soobin who's giddy, having your body completely engulfed by him, no space between the two of you with his hand wrapped around your waist, snuggling close to you, a grin so wide as you both quickly fall into sleep, some of his seed leaking down your leg, your swollen abused cunt unable to fully follow through your boyfriend's command.

★ choi beomgyu |

beomgyu was never known as being an overly... patient fellow which would explain a lot. like the time he burst into a woman's bathroom because he just could not wait a few more minutes until the janitor could unlock the jammed door for the mens', or when he downed a spiked drink a second before he could be told that he was supposed pour it down the sink, or...now, when he has you pinned on the floor, clearly not in the mood to stop and take it to bed. "beomgyu—" you gasp when he starts nibbling on your earlobe, grounding his erection in between your legs. you start laughing nervously when he slowly trails his kisses down to your exposed collarbones, "let's get up, beomgyu, baby stop playing around."

he whines, starting to teasingly suck, slight nip on your skin. and you just...can't wrap your head around the position you're in—a few seconds ago, you were watching a cute movie with your beloved, adorable boyfriend and suddenly the teasing jokes started, then the addition of pillow fights on each other had you both toppling to the floor, giggling like little children. and now you had your boyfriend on top of you, not willing to negotiate and do the deed on the couch at the least— something a little more comfortable than a hardwood floor with no carpet furnishing. instead he busies himself, already rutting his hips against the aching need between your thighs, soft groans magnified to your ears, his breathing getting heavier and faster by the minute.

"beomgyu, we're on the floor." you repeat for the hundredth time— in between the startled gasps every time he got just a tinge bit rougher—thinking it'd get to his head this time. "who cares?" he whines, his sly hands already finding their way under your shirt, ministrating, fondling like the horny dog he was. "you're so fucking hot noona, can't control myself."

patience was never beomgyu's thing. having your shirt haphazardly pulled over your tits because he was just too goddamn impatient to undress you properly, your panties bunched to the side in frantic urgency as he finally prods his leaking tip at your entrance, sliding it in and out to prep, light headed as he bites down on his bottom lip, before he decides he just can't wait any longer, voicing his sorries over and over again as he fully takes you in unexpectedly, stretching out your tight pussy, earning him a delicious, drawled, loud moan of his name. and oh, does he fucking lose it. "louder, say it louder."

beomgyu who pounds you senseless, hand reaching up to grope your breasts every time he gets close, strained groans when he spills inside you again, hips still unrelenting, fucking his seed into you, his sweaty shuddering body looming over you when he stops for a second to catch his breath, you similarly worn out, head hazy, barely able to use your strained voice as you had lost it by the...you could barely keep count. "such a fucking cumslut, huh? taking everything so well noona," he babbles with each sudden thrust to your pliant body, you unable to arch your back from utter exhaustion, "love you, love you so much baby."

bonus. beomgyu's favorite locations? many, but the floor always takes the cake. the animalistic nature of just pure horniness and sweaty backs on the cold wooden floor—it's beomgyu's thing.

★ kang taehyun |

it starts off with the subtle brush of his hand on the roundness of your ass, a few times and you pretend it's nothing. then came a squeeze, right as you were washing dishes with your mom, the suddenness of the action making you freeze for a second, the polite gentleman facade he put up with your mom as he converses, leaving yet another good impression. it all confuses you— how he's able to play it off like nothing while you were practically breaking out in cold sweat. it couldn't be accidental. nothing is accidental with taehyun.

you weren't nervous about introducing taehyun to your (rather conservative) family—he was unanimously picked as your best partner thus far by even your closest friends, which you trust the judgement of. you believe it too, that he's the nicest, most genuine guy you're lucky having to call yours...but it seemed that with each passing minute, you were questioning your decisions.

taehyun isn't a fan of typical pda: hand holding, kissing, embraces that overstayed its welcome, but oh was he particularly bold with everything else. sitting at your family's home dining table, the one you grew up with, reminiscing the countless mornings of rushed breakfasts as a teenager— even recognizing the initials you carved by the edge of the table, it all rushes back to you and you feel guilty for not visiting as often as you should have. your mom who displays a feast on the table, ranging from delicates to turkey and fried rice—your father sitting right by her, uncles and aunties filling the remaining seats, everyone joyfully eating and conversing amongst themselves before your mother clears her throat to finally quench her curiosity.

occupation, the college he graduated, plans for marriage, kids, all of which he answered with perfectly satisfactory answers earning him a few swoons from the older women, to which he tried to be humble making the women get even more swoonful over the generous flaunt of his pearly whites...all the while you sit there at the edge of your seat metaphorically and physically, more than aware of the hand toying with the hem of your dress, dangerously inching closer and closer to your inner thighs.

you could barely hold up your glass of wine without having your hands shake just so slightly at the dangerous game taehyun was more than willing to play. you try to clear your throat, anything to get him to wake up, and remind him where you were, but he seemed nonchalant, picking at his food, eating at small portions, participating in conversation when prompted.

"why aren't you eating y/n? i cooked you your favorite foods!" your mom pouts, drawing the attention of the entire family, all eyes on you—which was just great. just great as taehyun's hand hid under the tablecloth, finger long stuffed in your cunt, your panties bunched to the side as he had his way with you, insanely slow as he decides to shove a second finger making your eyes widen, quickly reaching for the glass to drown out any noise you might slip up—but taehyun's gaze is focused on you, following the crowd, awaiting your answer to the pending question. "um, uh—yeah, sorry, i-i ate a few hours ago."

lies. when it's time for a movie and conveniently, you get to the living room last as you went out to fetch everyone a soda, realizing that you'd have to sit on the floor. taehyun catches you looking for a place to sit, pulling on your dress to catch your attention. when you turn around raising an eyebrow, he pats his lap, motioning to you to come sit, but you shake your head.

you can't, and frankly you don't trust taehyun to not...do something. but he tuts at you, patting his thighs again, this time, mouthing it to you, "sit."

"aww, you guys are so adorable, y/nie go, go, sit." you snap your head to see your mother, who's been invested with your relationship the entire dinner night. "no, mom, i don't want to make him uncomfortable i-"

"what kind of man would be uncomfortable with his girlfriend sitting on his lap?" your uncle speaks up and now all of a sudden, everyone's pitching in the conversation to the point you might just be driven to insanity with all the back and forth. when everyone settles down and the lights are shut off, you feel taehyun's chin resting on your shoulder, a cute gesture until you hear him whisper, "try to stay quiet baby."

the real intentions of kang taehyun were always less than pure.

bonus. spilling juice on your white dress with purpose, unknownst to everyone else who're quick to take out napkins and dab it on the stain, panicked over the ruined white—taehyun taking it as an opportunity to come off as caring as possible to your family, heightening his approval ratings, excusing you both to the bathroom so he can try and clean it off. it was a win win, getting your parents approval, and pounding you in the same bathroom you got potty trained.

a/n. my obsession with soobin + pregnancy talk is detrimental to my mental being holy shit 😂 wanted to try out some footing with different settings, a little bit of a headcanon practice and dom!txt as i have practically almost nothing of the sort in my masterlist that isn't totally fucked up. thoughts and overall feedback are extremely helpful and appreciated, it motivates me greatly. to all those who wanted sub soobin, i promise i'll serve a full fic soon ❤

#txt smut #soobin smut #beomgyu smut #taehyun smut #soobin hard hours #beomgyu hard hours #taehyun hard hours #txt hard hours

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ravensmadreads · 8 months

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Unhinged totally unasked for thots about Riding Pedro Boys

Authors Note: So this came from me chugging entirely too many energy drinks and then projectile vomiting in Taylors inbox. I'd like to warn you that: English isn't my first language, I have never written smut before, I'm not a real writer, and also I'm trash goblin levels of unhinged about this. That being said; Enjoy and uhh. Forgive me Fandom

JAVIER PEÑA

Javier Pena doesn't let you do it.

Don't @ me LISTEN! (YES I STARTED OFF WITH A CONTROVERSIAL THOT FUCKING BITE ME.)

That man does not have the time, or the patience, or the good sense (the sense is at the other end) to let you ride. He needs the control okay? And sometimes it's not even about the control ! It's the frustration. It piles and piles and piles until he snaps. He needs to do. He will bend you over and work his frustration away until he has had enough and you let him because he needs it. (And lets be real he makes it worth your while every single time)

BUT. When he finally fucking retires, and gets a ranch, and breaths air not tinged with the smells of death, cigarettes and guns for the first time in however many years, and maybe drinks some fucking water, he takes you out on a date. He fumbles through the entire thing, panics because he thinks he blew it, still manages to get you home, gets ridden for the first time in like 6 years, and can't walk straight for an entire day and stammers every time someone asks him why.

JAVIER GUTIERREZ

Javi G loves it. He loves watching you. Gets all puppy dog wide eyed (remember the pool scene face??? Thats it.) and you have to really focus because his look of straight up wonder and awe and bright eyed eagerness makes you want to cry. He's panting like he's running a marathon, running his big hands EVERYWHERE he can reach. He makes you feel worshipped and adored and so very very loved. Thanks you after. For being so amazing, and so wonderful to him, and thanks the universe that he found you. Cause he's sap. You definitely cry after.

JOEL MILLER

(Watch me be controversial again) Joel is fucking tired okay? He has old man bones and creaky joints and his back is achy. Patrol was agony, Jesse wouldn't shut up the entire time, and Tommy was giving him shit, and he has no energy to drill anyone into the mattress (as much as we all want him to). He's just plain tired. He likes you on top. Likes it slow (like a roast chicken on a sunday slow). Enjoys the gradual build up, likes to lean back, watch with half open eyes as you take your time. Wants to indulge in something beautiful at the end of the world, and that something is you. He makes sexy grunting noises, mutters a whole lot of praise ~and filth~ and just y'know. Savours it. 🫠🫠🫠 savours you. 🫠

DIETER BRAVO

Dieter is a maniac. (Leave him alone he has adhd!!) He can't still still for the life of him so you best believe he changes positions 6 times and the only way you're getting to ride is if you're also putting some weight elsewhere. To hold him down! You squeeze his neck once and he MELTS. INSTANTLY. Loses all sense. Starts babbling and whimpering and making extremely pathetic noises. Will definitely buck up and whine. PRAISES YOU. BEGGING. LOUD NOISES.

MAX PHILLIPS

Max is a heathen. He just likes watching you bounce. That's it. That's the post :p

MARCUS PIKE

Marcus P is a romantic. He will be doing the whole "lean forward and try to get kisses in between" while also "moaning and maintaining eye contact" and he's holding you so tight , squeezing your sides and also muttering declarations of love. About how he wants a life with you, and a family, and a home, and a future. How he's going to "make you so happy baby, I promise I will, I swear to you". Doesn't let you off for from on top of him for atleast a half hour after; kissing all over your face and rubbing your back and petting your hair "I meant all of it sweetheart. I want all of you." shsbzgwgsvsg ilovehimsomuch and I've only ever seen gifsets of this man what is wrong with me

MARCUS MORENO

Marcus M is A MENACE. He wears his stupid glasses, and has his stupid shirt off, while he does stupid taxes/meeting plans in bed. You keep throwing side glances and getting increasingly wound up and he just has this gentle smirk but he's mostly ignoring you. You sidle up to him and maybe start kissing his jaw, laying gentle pecks down his neck, and he's still fukcungh working "Baby. I need to finish this. I'm sorry, you need to wait." But that smirk is still there and it's driving you crazy and maybe you keep kissing until you reach his *coughs* and then you're working on getting him interested. You can still hear the fucking pen scratching though and so you go deeper, and he raises an eyebrow. "be good now honey" You're settling in his lap and he has you sitting there until he has finished his paperwork with you whimpering and trying not to squirm because you want to be good you really do and you know he'll make it so much better but he feels so good and when he's finally finally done you get to move but you're so wound up you can't pull yourself together enough to find a rhythm and you're nearly in tears and he has to grip your sides and murmur instructions in your ear and help you until you're satisfied and just when you think he's done, and about to flip you over, he adjusts his grip and starts moving from underneath you until you're crying and he's finished ~which doesnt happen until you've come 2 more times~

DAVE YORK

Dave. Oh my gosh Dave. Dave is a strict dom if ever there was one. With him it's a punishment. He'll tell you to hold off until he's done which is freaking impossible with how deep he gets, and how he likes to warm up his hands on your butt while you're trying desperately to hold onto that last thread of control. He is muttering absolute filth, holding your arms behind your back with one hand while the other is either laying smack after smack or rubbing you furiously all the while he's got the smuggest look. "Don't you dare baby. Be a good girl now. Listen and obey for once". But you can't because he's not fair and he knows it. And when you do finally fall apart he's clenching his teeth trying to hold back himself and his hands are holding you up as you gasp his name like it's the only word you know. He's running his hands down your back and kissing you softly and helping you catch your breath and when you finally get your heart to stop pounding and look up at him, he's watching you with this dangerously soft smile and he goes "oh you're in for it now aren't you honey?" and kisses your forehead while you try not to whimper.

FRANKIE MORALES

Frankie is a soft boy. He loves it. Craves it. He loves giving up control. Wants you to tie him up and have your way until he has no thoughts left in that pretty little head. He is swearing like an absolute sailor the entire time, calling you ma'am, begging to be released so he can kiss you and touch you, absolutely nearly breaks the head board once he was so desperate. Wants to be edged but also is the biggest WIMP about it. Will pout and swear and beg and plead but then want you to deny him again. Will definitely be mumbling absolute nonsense once you're done. Needs all the aftercare. Blushes pink when he gets it. Wraps himself around you like a HUGE koala bear after. ~and returns the edging favour 3 times over when he gets in his Captain Francisco Morales Mood~

JACK DANIELS

BONUS TWO I KNOW NOTHING ABOUT and tumblr won't let me put gifs for:

Jack makes every single cowboy joke known to man. You have to put your hand on his mouth to get him to shut the hell up. His eyes get all glassy when you do. He puts his hat on top of your head and busies himself in your neck (dual benefits: A. He shuts up and B. HICKIES) will definitely drag you on top of him in his Bronco (he likes to show off) will pull up on the side of the road almost 70% of the times you drive together. Bites you over your clothes. Loves the way you grab desperately at this leather jacket. Definitely makes you bend over and 'clean up the mess sugar' before driving like the hounds of hell are after him all the way back home and doing it all over again because "we gotta make you a mama now love"

PERO TOVAR

Pero got married after he came back and retired as a sell sword. His wife is a soft but sassy thing who's a little (read: not at all, she returns his snark twice over) intimidated by him but also thinks he's a good man because he saved her village from raiders. She has seen him grumble and snark at but then also share his food with the orphans who works at the village inn. She's inexperienced (let me live my victorian life) and he doesn't really think he deserves her but also he's not so much an idiot to say no to someone like her. She's the village "healer" and he met her when he got stabbed by one of the raiders (arm wound: not serious.) He has to teach her. She gets shy and flustered, which is a total 180 from her sassy self, and Pero loves it. She makes the most amazing sounds that have him thinking that maybe he did something right in his life to end up in her arms. She wants to please her new husband and asks her married friends for advice and they tell her about this new position. So she asks him, stuttering and tripping over words, if she could try something she heard about? From a friend? She straddles him and Pero loses his mind. He's closing his eyes and clenching his jaw so hard and she's whimpering in the most DELICIOUS way and he's trying so hard to hold back and let her take her pace and she's so worried "am I not doing it right?" Pero has to take 3 deep breaths before he's centred enough to answer and then he helps her. Puts his hands on her hips to guide her. Puts one of her hands on his shoulder "steady now pequenita" and puts the other low on her belly and presses in so she can feel him. Loves the way she cries out. Bends forward to leave little marks everywhere he can reach. She's scrambling at his chest, leaving nail marks he loves, and finally grabbing his hair and pulling until he groans. And when they're both done and sated and sweaty he kisses her, looks her in the eye and winks. "I'm going to have to go thank your friend now, mi esposa."

DIN DJARIN

Din and you dont have time. The razor crest is finally in hyperspace, you got shot at for the 50th time in 2 weeks, (because Murphys Law seems to be the only law Mando never breaks), you're exhausted, sweaty, and the giggly green monster of chaos only made you chase him down from the top of a weapons cabinet twice before he finally decided to take a nap. You're frustrated, and in desperate need of a shower, and a nap, but also you can't get the image of Mando fighting out of your head. Before you know it, the hormones have taken over and you're attacking him in the pilot seat. The bucket is off (I refuse to look at my own reflection in the tin cans helmet while we do the do), he's got you arching into him, your shirt is half torn from the top because Din refuses to wait for "so many fucking buttons Meshla" the gloved hand is squeezing the back of your neck, his mouth is on your chest, his other hand (you only managed to get one glove off) is splayed out on your back. You're riding him like you're trying to break him and his thigh holster? thing (do i look like i can figure out what they're called?) is digging marks into your skin but you're too turned on to care. It's frantic, it's messy, you're PRAYING the tiny green menace stays asleep as you do your best to muffle your sounds. The refresher isn't big enough for a round two, (you still do your best), and your legs feel like jelly, when you finally pass out; curled up on top of the human space heater while he hums Mando'a in your ear.

*****

TAGGING: @chronically-ghosted (you are a menace but ily)

@fuckyeahdindjarin (here I go trying that writing thing again, stop me pls)

#raven writes #i apologize for all of this #idk what came over me #i was possessed #and taylor refused to sedate me #javier pena x reader #dieter bravo x reader #javier gutierrez x reader #joel miller x reader #marcus moreno x reader #marcus pike x reader #dave york x reader #pero tovar x reader #din djarin x reader #max phillips x reader #frankie morales x reader #jack daniels x reader

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gojou-violin · 1 year

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oh, little brother~

family ties collab with @killsaki

| pairing: younger!brother!meguru bachira x fem!reader

| warnings: 18+ MDNI. dead dove, do not eat. incest. dub-con. virginity loss. corruption kink go brrrrrrr. slight manipulation. cum eating. blowjob. vaginal fingering. vaginal penetration. feeding cum. guys. guys. it's really perverted..... listen...... i-

| wc: 5.9k

| taglist: @aylitgirl , @sailewhoremoon , @justanotherpasserby-blog , @lyteatus , @bakugosgorl , @unknownspecies , @bleuboyfriend , @theyluvizzy , @drakensdarling , @itoshis-after-dark , @alekstraszas , @mimic-of-hysy , @garden-variety-skeleton , @daddyisyourmommy , @dragon-chica , @princesssofiyuh , @skiagrafia , @pr0dkang , @erenslver , @nemjun

| a/n: if i hear one person complaining about this when the warnings are very clear............. also. if i have to make this obvious....... bachira is aged up to be over 18. 'k, cool.

Some people were so adorable that you could just eat ‘em up. You take one look at them, see how small and precious they are, how lost they can seem, how they clearly need someone to guide them through every small part of life because all they know how to do is sit there and look pretty. Most people got jealous if they saw someone like that, but not you. No, no. The cute and innocent ones were those that you could scoop up to hide in your pocket, and that made you content. Patting them on the head, telling them they’re doing great. Taking their hand to lead them. Watching their faces turn a bright red color whenever they’d get embarrassed of themselves because of something you’d say or do just to get them riled up. Fuck… How perfect the innocent could be.

For the longest time, though, you had to ignore that heartstring-tugging urge whenever you were around one person specifically. It was a shame, relly. Out of all the blushy and small ones you’d seen, he was by far the most ravishable. But no one would understand. No one. Perhaps not even him. You had to observe from afar while pushing the envelope a bit here and there just to test the waters for reactions out of him; Like how he’d panic and blush whenever you’d compliment him for passing an exam with flying colors. Your favorite bone to throw him was whenever he’d do so well in a soccer match, you’d hug him tight— Despite how sweaty he’d be— and praise him to Hell and back for being the best striker in the whole world. He always melted in your arms. That was the highest praise he could ever receive from the person who’d always looked after him and loved him. Whenever he’d smile up at you, thanking you for the compliments, you were always on the verge of breaking, of snatching him up and stealing him away, but he’d always end it with, “Big Sis,” and reality crept back in. Observe from afar. No matter what.

Meguru had been in love with soccer since the day he was born. In fact, you could vividly remember how your parents bought him toy soccer balls even as a baby. As you two grew up, he’d beg you to kick the ball around with him in the backyard— A task that originally started off as a nuisance, but as you got older, you began to enjoy it more because you got to spend quality time with your brother outside of talking about school and complaining about your parents. In high school, though, he took soccer so seriously that it became his entire life. He’d wake up early to train, go to school, train between classes, train after school, eat, train, sleep, repeat. He hardly had any time for you anymore. His own sister! Who could believe that! But, fine, if that was what he wanted, you could support him, because that was what siblings did.

In college, things slowed down for him. He played soccer for the team at university that gave him a full-ride scholarship so he hardly had to worry about his studies. You continued to watch from afar. Again, cheering him on at each of his games, praising him for passing the exams he studied for (or didn’t— you’d never admit it to your parents). In between all of that, though, Meguru spent his time with you. Whenever you would get lunch together, he’d pick at his food while reflecting on how he could still get better at soccer even after all these years; or he would stare at you so… longingly… whenever you would be talking about your own courses and how they were getting harder now that you were close to graduating. You always told him to appreciate how easy the first year could be.

But it was those looks that made your heart tug. His eyes could get so big, his pupils dilated so much that you felt like you could read his thoughts that were screaming: “How magnificent you are, Big Sis.” And how you hated that. How wicked he was for teasing you while you could never have him… It could have been so easy for you to lure him in with the praises and leading if he had been anyone else in the world, but with Meguru, you had to be careful. His big eyes were a trap. His red cheeks were akin to the voice of a siren.

“Are you okay?” he asked you suddenly.

You snapped out of your trance to look up at him. “Y-yeah—”

Meguru had just finished another match that you attended and he won. After celebrating with his teammates for about an hour on the field, everyone dispersed to do their own things, which usually meant the two of you would go out to get food. Your sudden and interrupted trip down memory lane had been triggered by Meguru coming out of his bedroom, slowly struggling to pull his shirt over his head while trying to avoid his wet hair since he had just showered; and you had gotten caught up in staring at his abs and V-line that was quite revealing due to his low-hanging sweatpants. His midriff made you freeze up. The shirt he was wearing must have been about an inch or two short, because even as he was reaching up to tie his hair out of his face, you could still see his flat stomach…

He smiled oh-so-innocently at you. “Where to, then?”

“I…”

Usually you had your act together. Observe from a distance, remember? Never be too obvious. Don’t let anyone ever assume that you were staring at your younger brother who was now kneeling down by your feet to tie his shoes.

He was right there. Within reach.

That innocent look. The lost puppy who needed to be told where to go and what to do. The fact that he’d tease you with how he dressed and behaved around you.

Be careful. Don’t be stupid.

“Megu… Why don’t you change into something else before we go out?”

He furrowed his brows. “Why?”

“Well it’s a bit cold for something so…”

Every bit of reason you had left went flying out the window the second he started rolling the waistband of his sweatpants so that they could hang even lower on his hips without him dripping on the bottom hems.

You grabbed his hands to stop him from going any further, yanking him towards you so that he stumbled forward, falling onto your lap, his shirt riding up, his face buried in your shoulder. He yelped as it happened. It was all so sudden, the way you went from the kind and caring big sister you’d always been, to someone acting all on instincts that had been building up for far too long. He tried to push himself up by supporting his hands on your knees, but you caught him by the wrists again to keep him right there on your lap, his face daringly close to yours so that you could see every bit of confusion and panic in his big eyes.

You giggled at him. “Oh, little brother…” you cooed sweetly. “What to do with you.”

He blushed under your intense stare.

“What is it? Cat got your tongue?”

That confidence you knew you had in you instantly returned to you once you knew you had the upper hand once he could no longer tease you. If only he knew the consequences of playing with your emotions like that… Someone so innocent should have never been pushing his pants that low while wearing a shirt one size too small.

“Were you hoping to catch someone’s attention at lunch?”

He tried to push off again, yet you held steady.

“Some other college girl you have in mind, Megu?”

“No…”

“No? Then why’re you showing off so much?”

Observe from afar. Don’t let anyone know.

Your cold palm slid over his abdomen, working down, down, down as you felt his muscles contact until you were resting right over the waistband of his sweatpants. Meguru relaxed a bit on your lap as he anticipated your next move. You tsked your tongue while gently scratching his stomach with your nails. He squirmed.

“You don’t feel embarrassed when dressing like this in front of your own sister?”

In the most adorable way imaginable, he actually mewled and wiggled around to get you to touch him more— Your own brother! Begging you so pathetically to do more. Perhaps you should have expected him to be so needy and responsive when you knew for a fact that he’d never dated anyone, or even made out. Despite being the star soccer player in both high school and college, he always ignored the girls that fawned over him, then he had the audacity to always complain to you about how lonely he was and how he was certain no girl would ever want him as much as he wanted them. You assumed he was just incredibly picky. Never in a million years would you have guessed that he just needed someone to teach him what to do. You could have taught him everything he needed to know if he would have told you sooner! Talking to girls, flirting with them, asking them out… Making out with them… Fucking them…

“What is it, Megu?” you teased, payback for his post-shower display.

As he maneuvered on your lap to sit on you completely so that he was comfortable with his back pressed against your chest, you couldn’t help but drift over his crotch— It was an accident, of course. You hadn’t meant to go so far after years of promising to not go so far; but he’d done it. Maybe it was on purpose. Maybe he didn’t know better. Whatever the case was, it happened, and you could suddenly feel just how hard your little brother was in his sweatpants.

“Fuck,” he cursed under his breath.

You swooned mentally.

Every bit of what you loved about the small and cute type was right in your hands, quite literally falling onto your lap. The opportunity was too good to give up or go back now. Pushing off the little voice in the back of your mind, you finally slipped your hand under his waistband.

“Need to warm up my hands somewhere, Megu, I’m sorry.”

He turned to hide his face in the crook of your neck. Whether it was to hide his shame or excitement, you honestly couldn’t be sure, yet that didn’t deter you from using your thumb to swipe over his tip to get a feel for what you were working with. What had your little brother been hiding from you all this time? Pre-cum was already dribbling onto his pubic bone, coating your thumb. Poor thing needed someone to get him off so badly. You couldn’t give in so easily, though, not when this delicacy was something that would likely only ever happen once, and if he was too uneducated or inexperienced, he could be easily spooked off your lap and out of the room. You had to keep luring him in the same way you would with any of the other lost puppies you came across. So you pulled your hand back out and brought your thumb to his lips.

“Taste yourself, Megu.”

He looked up at you warily, his big eyes pouting.

“Look, it’s not that bad.” You licked your thumb while staring at him, your heart skipping a beat. “You taste good.”

He watched as you slid back down to gather more pre-cum from inside of his pants, not even touching his erection this time. So pathetically needy. And as you came back up, he willingly opened his mouth for you, sticking his tongue out and everything.

“Look at me while you do it.”

Those eyes of his fell in love with you the second your thumb made contact with his tongue. You could felt how slick and gentle he was with it, how he first wanted to try it before leaning in all the way, wrapping his warm lips around your thumb entirely, all while still staring right at you like you told him to.

With a pop, you pulled your thumb out of his mouth, catching him off guard fast enough to lean down and in to kiss him. He sat on your lap, unsure of what to do. You knew that if he regretted it, he would have pushed you off again and run off— He had the strength for it from soccer— but instead he waited, trying to see what you were doing and how you were doing it. So you taught him. Without a single word, you kissed him harder, hoping that he’d catch the hint and kiss you back. It took another second for him to get the hang of it, understanding that all it took was leaning into you while trying to kiss back the best he could. He wasn’t good at it by any means, but it was his first time, and you appreciated his eagerness to try and learn with you.

“You’d never lie to me, right, Megu?”

“Never,” he insisted.

“You’ve never been with anyone, right?”

For as much as you two talked, maybe there was a secret hiding in there that your younger brother never felt comfortable sharing with you; but now that you were doing something that you’d have to share as a secret for the rest of your lives, so of course he could fess up if he needed to. However, Meguru shook his head. It was true, what you’d always known about him, that he was so oblivious to everything you’d been thinking, otherwise he would have caught onto the other girls who all thought the same things about him. Your little brother. A virgin. You were even his first kiss. You wanted more. How could you stop there? You were already knee-deep in trouble, anyhow…

“Are you scared?” you asked calmly.

He nodded. “We shouldn’t do this.”

Your touch left him, despite his pitiful complaint via another whimper. “You can leave, Megu, I’m not gonna stop you.” For a moment, you hesitated to see if he’d actually take you up on the offer, until you were content with how he stayed glued to his seat on your lap. You grinned. “Or you can stay with Big Sis,” you whispered in his ear, “and I can teach you anything you want to know.”

The hairs on the back of his neck stood at attention when you began to kiss his jawline, hands grabbing his hips, your feet squeezing between his so that you could hook his legs around yours, forcing him to spread open for you.

“Is that something you’d be interested in, Megu?”

Your hand drifted over his erection, your palm grinding back and forth to create some fiction for him. Much to your surprise, he turned slightly to face you before attempting to kiss you sloppily. Your own little brother, trying his absolute best to now impress you, someone who took much pride in how much experience you had in ruining sweet things like Meguru.

“Tell me what you want,” you mumbled against his lips.

He pulled away. Those dark eyes bore into your soul as he told you, deadpan, “Everything.”

Your grip on his hips tightened. “Careful what you wish for.”

Despite how fit he was because of soccer, Meguru had always been small enough for you to pick up whenever you were teasing him— And while you couldn’t get far with him anymore, you could get exactly where you needed to go: Right back to his bedroom. A few stumbling steps with him in your arms, you managed to make it, quickly “tossing” him, for lack of a better term, onto the bed.

He scrambled onto the mattress, almost like he was creating a cautious distance between the two of you. Was he scared now? The door was right there, wide open, anyone could walk in on you at any moment if they had a spare key, or if they knew where the extra was hidden outside of his apartment. It would be so embarrassing for him to run out if he wanted while hard because of his big sister. It would be even worse if someone did happen to catch the two of you. Part of you liked the exhilarating feeling that gave you the courage to climb onto the bed; Meanwhile the other part of you was warning you to be careful. The neighbors knew you two were home together because they congratulated Meguru on his win when you ran into them in the hallway. If they heard anything suspicious, they’d surely know immediately what you two were up to. But you wished so desperately to ruin your little brother. You could imagine what the next few minutes could potentially look like based on your past experiences. Him whining your name while on the verge of tears was up there on your wishlist. Seeing him get red with embarrassment while he would be cumming because of you was another dream.

Without a word, you slid between Meguru’s legs, leaning down to kiss him while cradling the sides of his head to hold him steady. Your pelvis grinded up against his. Still as hard as he’d been out in the living room where he’d been teasing you. Did he do it on purpose? You were certain that he must have been. Did he expect that things would go this far? Was he hoping that you had the balls to finally leap at him? Was he playing with fire all because he liked the attention and knew that you’d never do anything to him, your little brother? If that was what he thought, the poor thing was in for the shock of his life.

“It didn’t take much to get you hard for me, Megu.”

His breath hitched against your lips as your hand crept between your bodies and you found his dripping tip again. “S-stop.”

“Stop?”

He shook his head. “No, don’t stop— Fuck— Just— D-do something…”

You laughed at how distressed he was and all you’d done is touch him a few times here and there. You wondered if he would stay like this forever or if his firsts would change him as a person, giving him the confidence you carried with you. Fuck, you hoped that he would never change. If he stayed like this forever, melting under you, begging you to touch him, you knew that you could live the rest of your life happily, because even if nothing ever happened again, at least you could feel victorious in having been your little brother’s first.

Without much convincing, you easily pushed his low-riding pants down to his knees, allowing his erection to spring free, finally giving you confirmation of what you had always known about your sweet little brother who was oh-so-picky about his women. One day, he’d make someone very happy with what he had to offer… Very, very happy. He just had to learn how to use it all first.

“Like this, Megu?”

As you took his length in your right hand, his back arched. He hissed at the feeling, his toes curling, hands grabbing desperately at his sheets. You slowly pumped your hand from base to tip.

“Breathe.”

He let out a heavy sigh while forcing his body to relax.

“Tell me what you want to learn.”

“Everythin—”

“Tell me very specifically.”

Meguru tried to hide humiliation by grabbing a pillow and putting it over his face. A muffled moan left him as your fist did another slow pump along his length.

“Tell me, Megu.”

Through the pillow, he croaked, “Stop it… I don’t— I don’t know— I—”

“Oh, sweet thing,” you cooed.

Virgins were the cutest things in the entire world.

“How about this?”

You shifted downwards until you could start pushing his shirt up to his collarbone with your free hand, kissing his bare skin as it was exposed inch by inch. His abs tightened to the point you saw the clearest definition you’d ever seen from them— Not even soccer pulled this reaction out of him.

“Tell me, how does it feel?”

“Cold,” he quietly replied.

“Cold?” you questioned. “What about this?”

You lowered yourself entirely, wrapping your lips around his cock.

The pillow flew off his face in an instant as Meguru jolted up, his hands quickly finding their way to your hair for him to grab onto something, and he bucked upwards, fucking your mouth so suddenly, you let our a surprised moan. He moaned in response to the vibrations rolling through his body through the most sensitive part of him.

“Fuck, sis—”

You melted when he called you that. All this time, whenever he called you “Big Sis,” you got sad because it was a reminder that he was always out of your reach as a forbidden fruit, yet now he was moaning about it just for you, the only person in the entire world who could really relish the way he said it.

You pulled off to ask, “Still cold, or—”

But his grip on your hair tugged down, which forced you to take him back in your mouth, going as far down as you could before he tapped the back of your throat. You tried to push off, and while he gave you a little wiggle room, he didn’t let you escape him all the way. You got the hint. With you gaze following up his abs and to his own big eyes, you continued to suck him off the best you could. You worked your tongue around him, licking up his pre-cum, all while thinking about how he was so perverted enough to actually be convinced into trying it himself… What else would he do if you asked? How far would he go just for you? He was a quick learner when trying to kiss you, perhaps he’d be a quick learner for other things, too.

Meguru’s breathing picked up into a short-winded pant that let you know that only after a few seconds of having a warm touch on him was enough to get him towards the edge. It wasn’t like you were unfamiliar with that kind of reaction. So many of the cute ones couldn’t hold themselves back. They were usually selfish with you, though, refusing to admit that they were close out of fear that you would stop before they’d get to soar on Cloud Nine; but not your little brother. He was sweet enough to warn you— Maybe it was worry about cumming too soon, or maybe he was scared that he was cumming because his older sister was getting him off, or maybe he wasn’t scared at all. Maybe he wanted it.

“Shhh…” you cooed while hovering over him again, your hand on him to replace your mouth. You kissed him gently before moving to his neck. “Deep breaths, little brother.”

He moaned like an angel that fell from Heaven.

“There’s still more to learn.”

With curious eyes, Meguru silently questioned your next move as you quickly kicked off your shorts before grabbing his left hand.

“I made you feel good, didn’t I?”

He nodded urgently.

“Don’t you wanna make me feel good, too?” you asked with a pout.

“Y-yes— Anything— I’ll do anything—”

It was like he was drunk on lust. Blinded by seduction from a woman. Wholeheartedly in love with you just for touching him. It took so little to get your little brother wrapped around your finger, and now that you had him compliant to do anything, as he said, then you could move to use him for your own selfish gain, which was all you’d ever wanted from him since you first started observing from a distance. So you stuck two of his fingers out before holding him by the wrist to angle him at your entrance. His eyes widened. It was like he never expected it to feel like that— Wet and warm. You drifted his fingers along your slit until he found your clit.

“Feel that?” you asked him. He nodded. “Whenever you want to make a girl feel good, just play with this…” You started moving his hand so that his fingers flicked your clit back and forth, meanwhile your other hand continued to play with the top of his cock. “Try it yourself.” You released him.

Meguru couldn’t help himself any longer. That monster that always lingered inside of him whenever he played soccer suddenly leapt out to convince him to flip you over onto your back, tearing your hands away from his body so that he could inch down to see everything he was working with. His fingers played with your entrance a bit, as that was where he was familiar with as his starting point. He dipped in slightly. As you moaned, he glanced up at you with worried eyes, but once he realized that it wasn’t a painful moan, he grinned and pushed two of his fingers into you.

“So tight,” he noted to himself. “Does it always feel like this?”

You gulped. “It depends on the person.”

Meguru was invested in discovering all the possibilities imaginable, so he curled his fingers inside of you. He twisted his hand until he found your sensitive spot, forcing you to moan again. An evil smirk took over his face.

“And this…” He used his other hand to search for your clit, but he was struggling, so you decided to help him. He sighed at the feeling of it. “This makes you feel good?” His index finger drifted over your clit the same way you’d been playing with the tip of his cock. He really was a quick learner. “Is that right, Big Sis?”

“Faster—”

He didn’t hesitate to heed your command. The two fingers buried inside of you worked faster and harder to fuck you and curl against your g-spot that he magnificently found all on his own; and his index finger circled your clit at a pace you were so unfamiliar with. Most boys you’d been with didn’t understand how much work needed to go into fingering a girl, yet somehow Meguru knew.

He leaned down to stare at you as you fell apart under him. “I’m not oblivious, Big Sis. I’ve watched porn religiously forever… I had the general concepts down, just never had the opportunity to explore…” He smiled as you tightened around him. “I thought you’ve let every man you’ve laid eyes on fuck you. How can you still be this tight? Hmmm?”

How could your little brother be mocking you! Surely he had more respect for his older sister than that—

“If I make you cum, what will you do for me?” he asked. “Will you suck me off again? Will you teach me about eating you out? Will you teach me how to get better at kissing? What will you do, huh?”

It was your turn to reply with, “Anything!”

“I get it now,” he whispered teasingly, “why you like having someone whining and wiggling under you. It’s hot… Doesn’t matter who it is…”

You had to assert your dominance again. Meguru was getting too cocky for someone who barely knew how to find the clit, you had to knock him down a peg, reminding him that this was all happening because he pushed you too far with the teasing. This wasn’t happening because he asked. It was happening because you wanted to ruin him, not the other way around. So you propped yourself up on your elbows, kissed him, then whispered back that if he made his older sister cum, you’d make him see stars. And somehow that did the trick. With a bunny-like tap to his foot, he set to making you cum quickly. He kissed your neck, attacked your g-spot relentlessly, and added another finger to your clit for more pressure and speed. Soccer always taught him how to be a good team player while still outshining the rest of the team as their captain and lead striker— You could see that the monster in his eyes was bringing that same energy to making you cum. The goal was ahead. The trail had been set. All he needed to do was send you over the edge.

“Fuck— Right there, Megu—”

As you came around his fingers, your fingers found his hair, grabbing onto what you could while it was still tied back into a small ponytail. He sighed happily at the image of you. Glowing and shaking because of him.

“Like that?” he asked, unsure of himself.

You nodded as you caught your breath. “Like that.”

Meguru’s fingers slowly retreated from you. For a moment, you stared at each other in bewilderment, but the monster in him had something to say, which compelled him to hold his wet fingers up to your mouth.

“Look at me while you do it.”

So you obeyed. Carefully taking his fingers into your mouth, you sucked on them the same way you had sucked his cock— Your tongue swirled, your cheeks hollowed, you swallowed.

“M-My turn…”

Meguru took his fingers out of your mouth so that he could collect more of your wetness for him to taste. Spit mixed with your cum melted on his tongue. He moaned. Your sweet, innocent brother was turning into a pervert, all because of you. You weren’t sure if you should have been proud or disgusted.

“We should probably stop…” your voice of reason came out.

He furrowed his brows at you. “But you made a promise.”

“Megu…”

“Just the tip,” he begged. “Please… I wanna know what it feels like…” He grabbed your hip with his left hand and wrapped his right hand around his erection. “Just the tip, I promise.”

“Megu—”

He let out another obscene moan as his tip made contact with your dripping entrance. “Fuck.”

“Megu, we shouldn’t.”

For a moment, he hesitated, staring down at you, his eyes pouting to the point you nearly grabbed him by the hair just to throw him onto his back and ravish him— But that damn voice of reason was causing you to rethink everything. It was a shame. If you hadn’t been knocked into seeing some sense, you would have broken him completely…

“Do you think I’m a weirdo, sis?”

Your face dropped. Growing up, that had been his biggest fear: People considering him to be “weird.” He hated the idea of being ostracized simply for who he was, so he always found safe haven with you, his big sister who would never turn your back on him or consider him to be odd. Your brother was your brother. He was perfect. The bullies he faced as a kid were little shits who ruined how Meguru would see himself for the rest of his life; but you were set in showing him that he was amazing.

You pulled him down by the hair to kiss you. “You’re perfect.”

Both of you moaned when he excitedly rolled his hips.

“Just the tip, little brother, okay?”

With an eager nod, Meguru very carefully pushed in— Just the tip. He forced himself to stop short once he felt the slight pop through your entrance; and for a minute, he relished the feeling.

His arms buckled weakly, his body too overwhelmed to keep himself propped up above you anymore, so he fell to his elbows, pushing his cock into you a bit more. You hissed and pushed at his chest. Just the tip! Any more than that and you surely would be the weirdo siblings that fucked each other.

“Feels so good,” he whimpered in your ear. “Please.”

“Megu, don’t—”

But he didn’t hear you. Or maybe he didn’t want to listen. His hips pulled back to where his tip was barely in you again, and for a split second you thought that he would comply, but right after he’d tricked you into believing it was over, his hips fell down on you completely, every inch of him sliding in so easily. You pulled on his hair as you moaned his name.

“Harder,” he begged you.

Reason could go to Hell. You pulled harder at his hair to earn a groan and a swerve of his hips.

“So tight!”

You pulled harder. “Go faster. Pull out, then push back in. Go as fast as you can.”

With Meguru’s face buried in the crook of your neck, he pulled back before thrusting back in, discovering the type of rhythm he could gain with his hips before he could figure out what speed he was capable of. He played with how he could move around. Could he move his hips this way? Absolutely. What about this? Do it again! And what if he played with your clit while he did it? You cried out his name again.

The egoist in him came out.

A boost in his confidence that he was only ever seen carrying with him on the field, suddenly was over you. He did what he pleased with you. He fucked you fast and hard with no regards for the noises you two were making. It came to a point that neither of you cared if the neighbors heard because Meguru’s sweet moans in your ear was enough to claw at his back as you tipped over the edge.

“Pull out,” you begged him as you came, worried that he’d go too far.

Meguru whimpered. “Hold on.”

He overstimulated your clit without knowing it, all while he chased after his orgasm. He was right there. You could tell. The way he was breathlessly panting through every moan, how his hips were losing their rhythm. You grabbed onto his ponytail. The touch itself made him cry out your name, but as you pulled on the strands gently, he was finally there— With every bit of self-restraint he had left, Meguru pushed himself up, pulled out, and came on your stomach, jerking himself off so that he could ride his entire high out. You kissed him as he did it. You wanted him to savor the feeling, to remember what it was like getting to lose his virginity to his sister— So you kissed him hard, letting him test how he could force his tongue into your mouth.

“Fuck,” he croaked.

You pet his hair gently to make up for all the rough pulling. So your sweet, innocent brother liked it when you hurt him a bit… You blushed. How cute.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck…”

Meguru slumped, rolling onto his side until he was laying beside you.

You wrapped your leg over his waist to pull him close. “You did so good, Megu.”

In response to the praise, he turned such a bright shade of red, you thought he was about to explode.

“That was…” He sighed heavily.

You swiped your index finger through the cum on your stomach, collecting as much as you could, before bringing it up to his lips again, waiting to see if he’d initiate anything or just stare curiously at you again. To your elation, he gave in. Meguru stopped second guessing everything that had just happened so that he could suck on your finger. He lapped his tongue around it like you had done to his cock— He really was learning— and he swallowed so easily.

You laughed and fed him more. “Oh, little brother… I’m gonna have so much fun with you…”

#op #bachira #blue lock #fanfic #bachira meguru #meguru bachira smut #bachira smut #meguru bachira #meguru smut #bachira meguru smut #blue lock smut #blue lock fanfic

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dazais-guardian-angel · 8 months

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Chapter 110 is 13 pages long welcome to hell!!! so in a lot of ways this is just more fuel for a theory that I've had for a few weeks now, that's only gotten stronger with each recent season 5 episode, which is that the last episode of the season is gonna end on 110, and that Asagiri/Harukawa and Bones have been collaborating to make this happen, specifically because it's a major turning point that would be the only good place to end the season on.

When we started getting especially long chapters again (like from 25-35ish pages, with the exception of 107.5, the last two being some of the longest we've ever had), at first I just assumed that Asagiri/Harukawa got freed up from some other obligations they'd been having to cause the extremely short/half chapters, like promotional stuff for the anime/Beast movie, or working on light novels. But then 109 happened, with the "supposed" death of Dazai, and heavy emphasis at the end on how literally everyone is at their lowest point right now, and I got to thinking. 11 episodes is a strangely specific number for an anime season -- why not 12, or 13, or even 10, like you'd usually see? Why have we gotten suddenly gotten two 35 page chapters out of nowhere, that's almost unheard of at this point? They're both beautiful chapters, don't get me wrong (as always), and maybe A/H simply just didn't want to cut them in halves because they felt like the full emotional impact wouldn't hit/that there were no good cutoff points in them, but you can't deny that it's surprising, after all the shorter chapters we've been getting. Why has the anime been going at such insanely breakneck pacing for the most part ever since around the Sunday Tragedy chapters, even more so than it has in the past? So much so that it feels dangerously close to overtaking the manga?

Well, maybe, just maybe, it's because..... Asagiri decided a long time ago that whatever happens in 110 is the only point that feels "season finale"-worthy enough, in an arc that still isn't anywhere close to being completely wrapped up, and so both the manga and the anime have been specifically coordinated to reach that part within 2 and a half weeks of each other?

I've seen a lot of people now think season 5 will end with 109, and as much as my sadistic side would find that hilarious, I honestly don't think they'd do that and realistically don't want it to happen; it'd be so cruel to cliffhanger the anime for years like that, and just doesn't feel like a season cliffhanger BSD would do, a series that is ultimately hopeful and uplifting. Seasons 2 and 3 had a positive, conclusive ending; the only reasons seasons 1 and 4 didn't was because they're technically not really full seasons of their own, and are more like the first cour of another "season" that also came out that same year (seasons 1 and 2 both aired in 2016, so they're more like one big season, and seasons 4 and 5 have both aired this year, so they're also more like one big season, again taking into account how episodes 12 and 50 are not satisfying finales like episodes 24, 37, and hypothetically, 61, are). I really can't see season 5 ending with Dazai and Fukuzawa's supposed deaths, Sigma being unconscious and maybe close to death, Atsushi being vulnerable and limbless again, everyone we love still vampires, and the entire world being basically doomed; that's just too depressing and not like BSD at all. However, having said that, if it doesn't end there, there really isn't any good place to end the season before that, either, that feels in any way satisfying or like a finale at all. And so, to me, that only leaves after 109: chapter 110.

I think things are really gonna turn around next chapter. Like I said, everyone is at their lowest point right now, it cannot possibly get any worse, the framing of Dazai, Fukuzawa, and sskk at the end of 109 is telling us that; this is the time for the heroes to finally start winning again, with Aya being so close to pulling out the sword, and for all the thematic reasons other people have talked about to death that I don't need to go into here again. This upcoming chapter being so short again makes a part of me wary of 110 being "the one", so to speak, I won't lie, but at the same time, it's very possible that it needs to be that short because that's all the final episode of the season will be able to reasonably fit in, since it's already gonna be VERY close if they do make it all the way to 109. And at the end of the day, I don't doubt at all that Asagiri and Harukawa can make these the most monumental and game-changing mere 13 pages ever if they wanted to; a chapter does not at all need to be extremely long in order to be an important and impactful one, even if short ones we've gotten in the past haven't felt the most important.

An additional thought I've had, though this is much more crack territory than all this already is, is that since we know from Anime Expo that a Stormbringer movie at some point is highly likely (judging from Asagiri's reaction when someone brought it up), it's possible that chapter 110 and thus the final episode will involve the long-anticipated return of Verlaine and/or Adam, or at least some other major reference to Stormbringer, that would naturally and smoothly lead into a Stormbringer movie to explain things to people who haven't read the novel. It would make a lot of sense, especially since the s4 OP has the Old World sign behind Chuuya, which might be a hint that this has been in the works ever since seasons 4/5 were first in planning with Asagiri. We also know that Dazai and Chuuya's voice actors apparently struggled to record their lines together this season, which probably relates to 101 and possibly 109, but it could be 110 too.... I could be very wrong, as I'm no expert on this kind of thing, but I kinda doubt they would bring Chuuya's actor in for just the vampire growls, and Asagiri placing heavy emphasis on Chuuya's importance this season in that one interview gives me the impression that he's talking about much more than just 101/109. But that's the least solid evidence I have, that's just mostly based on vibes I get.

So basically, I think a lot of factors -- the unusual episode count, how close the anime is to catching up to the manga with three whole episodes left, the seemingly arbitrary recent chapter lengths, and the climactic events of 109 -- can tell us that 110 might be a very, VERY big deal. Again, there's of course no way this arc is anywhere near close to being finished, with so much left to address and resolve, but since it is currently incomplete in the manga, unlike the previously adapted arcs, if the anime was going to adapt it at all, they'd have to find a place that feels satisfying enough to end this season, knowing there won't be more anime for a long time after this, and so I think they specifically planned for that, from both Bones' and A/H's sides. 10 episodes might not have been enough to reach that point, but 12 or 13 might have been too many it wouldn't have been if Bones actually decided to slow down and let the story breathe the way it needs to, but this post isn't meant to criticize the anime, so maybe 11 was just right. And maybe Asagiri and Harukawa specifically pushed to make recent chapters longer than usual, in order to make sure that the manga reached the story content in 110 the monthly release right before season 5 was to end.

Is this just copium? Absolutely. Am I going to look like an absolute clown in two days when this post ages like milk? Probably. But the evidence is There, so let me just enjoy my delusions until Sunday, okay 🥂🫡

#bungou stray dogs #seriously call me a clown and point and laugh at me if I'm proven wrong all you want #but I really feel like there's solid evidence for this #either s5 isn't gonna reach 109 at all (but I seriously cannot fathom where you would want to stop before then) or they'll go beyond it #if they really do end it with 109....... well i'll give Bones kudos for having the balls to do that ig lol #maybe i'm underestimating (overestimating???) them idk #also just to clarify I don't wanna make it sound like I think Asagiri let the anime/Bones dictate the manga's pacing #like I'm sure these were his/their (him and Harukawa's) own decisions first and foremost #not that (if this theory is true) the anime had a major impact on how the chapters were split and that it-#-would have been extremely different otherwise #i'm pretty confident in that Asagiri does not do anything with BSD he isn't comfortable with #and he doesn't let anyone tell him how to write his story #I just feel like he worked with Bones to make this near-simultaneous release happen #BUT if this is the case I don't feel like it had any major effect on the writing/final product that is the manga #like the last handful of chapters have been so incredible #so I at least am still perfectly happy lol #(i mean i'm devastated and a nervous wreck but u know 🫡 in a good way lmao)#anyway 110 in two days please let this theory be true because I need some fucking hope already #please let Oda show up as Dazai's guardian angel to help (see what I did there-)#it would be the perfect way to end the collective season that is 4/5 with s4 beginning with Oda and now ending with Oda #Asagiri are you reading me are you picking up what I'm putting down please please a ghost Oda is long overdue please-#Oda Verlaine Adam just GIVE ME SOMEONE ALREADY 😭😭😭#MAYBE EVEN A TASTE OF THE FYODOR BACKSTORY TO TIE INTO HIM BEING IN ANIME UNTOLD ORIGINS. THE POSSIBILITIES ARE ENDLESS

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runabout-river · 20 days

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Thoughts on JJK Chapter 257 (Spoilers)

Big lore drop here. Not only does Sukuna reveal that he consumed his twin due to an illness/starvation of his mother but he also says that Kenjaku got hold of that twins soul (Jin) and made a baby with him.

Now this can be interpreted in many ways especially with multiple translations going on but right now we can say that Sukuna is spiritually at least Yuji's uncle BUT with how twins are said to be same on some level and how Sukuna said here that his and his twins soul are the same, you can also make the argument that Sukuna is Yuji's father.

And again on Yuji being created by Kenjaku: my theory is that in addition to Kenjaku making a baby with Sukuna's soul fragment, Kenjaku also created Yuji's body in the image of Toji and his complete Heavenly Restriction.

It's also good to see Megukuna again, I love that menacing face

Yuji doesn't stop with his Black Flashes, he even gets a BF by shoulder hit. Sukuna is also real for how many BF he tanks. Yuji is straight up breaking all records on this.

What I also wonder is how Kenjaku realised that Jin was Sukuna's soul fragment? How was Sukuna even able to tell that story accurately when he had been a foetus when the cannibalism commenced? Was he born with his twins limbs? Did Kenjaku use a bone from that twin to find Jin?

Just like Gojo had predicted at the very beginning, Sukuna's CT has ingrained itself into Yuji's body which means that he now has two CTs: Blood Manipulation and Shrine. (Fire Arrow and related techniques? Probably not though)

The form Yuji's slashes take is extremely funny both at first glance and when you think about it. Like, why the scissors and lines? Because that's how Yuji learned to cut! With safety scissors in kindergarten cutting up pre-marked paper!

In other words, not only does Sukuna say that Yuji's Shrine is at its infancy but the visuals themselves tell us the same. He still gets a little bit cut on his leg though. Sukuna is really accumulating injuries left and right.

Ino gets another moment to shine and we see his last summon before it gets shredded. We go back to the scene where the adults had discussed Nanami dying and we get a continuation of their dialogue. In that Ino asks to get Nanami's cursed weapon.

I made an entire theory on how that blade acquired Nanami's CT through Ino channeling Nanami's soul into it (originally a Nanami revival theory) but the implication here is that the blade already has the CT. 😤

Sukuna is really, really angry at Yuji even though with anyone else he would've been ecstatic about an opponent that strong.

I wonder when he realized that Yuji was the son of the twin he ate? And while he didn't seem that phased in the mini flashback he is definitely phased now.

Additional thoughts on Yuji being the son of Sukuna's twin and part of his soul

I think at the writing level, Gege wanted to avoid any "destined" fate for Yuji. If he had been Sukuna's twin then his fate in-story and as a plot device would've been clear cut which isn't that popular as a plot point these years.

By making Yuji the son of the "destined" person, Yuji gets an immense amount of agency without falling into bad plot elements that dictate "child of the prophecy" stories.

In this sense, Yuji resembles Luffy from One Piece more compared to Naruto and the destiny revelations from the end of the manga.

#jujutsu kaisen #jjk #sukuna #yuji itadori #itadori yuuji #ryomen sukuna #jin itadori #kenjaku #meta

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piracytheorist · 6 months

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Episode 32 notes!

Starting off right in the middle of action, right where we left off!

And some great animation there, too!

The thing about Anya is that her plans are so innocently silly that thanks to her young age, they actually work.

She's right there in front of Yor, acting like she doesn't recognize her, and Yor accepts that because a) it's easy and b) well Anya is a little kid, isn't she?

The fact that Anya is visibly sweating and has a very nervous expression shows that she's worried her plan won't work, and the entire family could come apart right there. She knows it's a risky plan... but because of the circumstances, it works perfectly not only to cover Yor but also to cover Anya's knowledge of Yor's secret.

I love her.

Also, a great way to take the fear of exposure away from Yor and help her focus on the fight! Worth waiting the entire week for!

I also love how excited the entire crowd was about seeing two people "play" with what seems to be lethal weapons. They'd do numbers as WWE fans.

The camera focuses on Yor as she's starting to question herself.

Yes you are! You're hesitating to get close because you fear you'll get hurt and you know that will make Anya and Loid sad! (And of course because you'll have no excuse to tell them but okay yeah)

Anyway. I just like how in comparison to the manga, we see her expression there during her inner monologue.

Yor comments about how professional the guy is with the chain, but then she has no problem using the chain's momentum to wrap it around his wrist and then his torso. Some excellent animation there showing the small details of her control of the chain!

~YOU'VE BEEN HIT BY-

YOU'VE BEEN STRUCK BY-

THE THOOOORN PRIIINCEEEEEEEESS~

She even used his immobilized body to make him bow. She's an absolute legend.

I've talked before that this isn't even a five-year-old roleplaying. She's actually getting involved with actual enemies of the state, helping their plans without them knowing, and having a blast. Her moral compass may be a little unhinged but by god is it steadfast XD

And then. The Grand RevealTM

WHITE ASS LEGS

I love him your honour. How did he even combine all that, I don't wanna know. The rainbow-tinted glasses is what ended me.

Anya Forger, professional heart-breaker.

Again. Talking with a guy who believes humans will never understand each other and who wants to wage another war, while Twilight has his own war trauma? No big deal. Anya calling him uncool? THE SHOCK AND DESPAIR OF HIS LIFE.

And off to the next chapter! Great transition in the anime - I can usually notice when they jump onto the next chapter, but this time I was surprised with how smoothly they took it from one to the next.

Turtleneck guy says he can't pick up Yor's scent? Even though he seems to have extraordinary smelling abilities?

Is that another reason why Yor is so good at sneaking up on people? She did sneak up on Twilight, after all...

"The bones" mentioned above... is that Loid talking about the skeleton keychain? There was, after all, a hidden bug in the store Loid and Anya were in...

Some things never change.

I can't wait for the moment he realizes how soundly she sleeps on his arms because she trusts him and he makes her feel safe, just like his mother did for him :)

Zeb! I finally get the name of the guy! I won't lie that calling him Furseal felt so weird, like, apologies if your name is Furseal but hey.

Anyway. His outburst felt so real. This man doesn't belong in crime.

And of course, Olka is way too desensitized to such violence, having grown up in the family, after all, and I kinda like how she goes like "Yo snap out of it". Endo really doesn't hold back from having women tell men off huh. I also love the baby talk she used with Gram. So cute.

This scene has the very same music used in the first episode where Twilight has his flashback and remembers what his reason to become a spy was. I feel kinda sad hearing it here because I'd thought that this melody would be used as [redacted]'s leitmotif, but its meaning seems to be connected with how people broken by war can find the hope in humanity needed for peace. Or something.

McMahon berates Yor for going near the door earlier even though she didn't hear their secret knock, but in reality it wouldn't matter - unless the assassin heard their voices from outside the door - because the assassin shot anyway. It would have been the same if she had protected Olka from the first moment and then tried to assess how to attack the guy. So maybe calm down, dude.

The moment Zeb was like "How are we supposed to sleep like that?" I was certain we'd see him sleeping and snoring deeply. I was not disappointed XD

Me when proper trigger discipline: 🥳💯👀🥳👌💯👀👌👌👀🎊👌🎊💯

First, good ol' focus on the ring on McMahon's finger. Second, I'm confused by the translation here in comparison to the manga. Here it says "as long as people continue to be people" while the manga says "as long as people are the way they are", and that can have a different meaning. The former sounds like conflict is in the nature of humans and that it's something we can never avoid, which doesn't seem to follow the story's ideal. It's what Donovan Desmond beliefs are based on, after all. The latter sounds like people are currently very focused on matters that cause conflict, and have a chance of reaching peace if taught differently.

I think, depending on the interpretation, it can tell a lot about McMahon's character. I will wait to see the rest of the arc to make up my mind.

And after he says that they're soldiers even in time of peace, the manga treats us to a panel of a pensive Yor, but the anime doesn't.

Stop robbing us, anime team!

Yor tells the others they should keep their shoes on - nice detail, btw - and Olka looks very familiar with such a concept, while it's Zeb who is a little surprised but accepts it. It's interesting what a character not reacting to something can tell about them!

As expected, Yor and Olka are vigilant, while Gram and Zeb sleep like babies. Let them rest XD

Some brand new music there! There's a lot of new music in general. And then THIS!

THIS IS THE FUTURE LIBERALS WANT ETC

The way Yor widens her eyes when she realizes what she just imagined! AAAAAAAAAHHHH!

And BOY we talk a lot about Loid's denial but the way Yor is still going like "No, no, no, priorities!" though. THE WAY SHE THINKS OF YURI BEING PROUD OF HER, THEN BEING AN INDEPENDENT MAN SHE MANAGED TO RAISE WITH A FEW ISSUES, AND THEN THE HAPPY FACES OF LOID AND ANYA EATING HER FOOD I WILL GO FERAL

Someone hug her omg she deserves the world 😭😭

Neither Twilight nor Yor are the only people neck-deep in denial though.

"The man decided to live for his job" yeah right. He sees one (1) pretty woman pay him some attention because of Bond and he's like "Well imma adopt a dog then". Bond's doubtful and rejecting reaction was priceless XD

This is so fucking funny to me for some reason aadshadfhsdgh. Look at him. Brought into despair by one (1) five-year-old.

I kinda love how he admits that he does fear the unknown, and has been simply trained to overcome it and try to deal with what he has in front of him.

And currently, his fear is for Anya's emotional state.

Having no idea that she's actually having the time of her life, even though she hasn't realized how deeply dangerous her situation is.

Anyway, I love that she brought Mr. Chimera with her on the trip <3

LOID HAVING HIS VERY OWN OH MAH GAH MOMENT I LAUGHED SO HARD

He is very seriously focusing on how he can make Anya happy. He thinks she asked to go for mini golf because she likes it, so he followed along, he saw her upset with how she lost, and believed she needed to experience winning in order to feel fulfilled, so he was determined to stay there until she won.

Anya takes him to the library and of course he's read everything. And even if he hadn't, he has photographic memory and can practically read through an entire tome in minutes.

But still, he's focused on her happiness, and he's satisfied that Anya is having fun reading comics. She goes for the puzzle (btw I love the idea of having a big puzzle available and leaving it to passersby to solve it. I once visited a school where they had one on a table in the halls and students would sit and try and solve it during recesses) and he analyzes it, thinks he can solve it quickly. Anya reacts in shock, and we hear a tiny hesitant "Oh" from him, because he noticed her sudden change in reaction.

Oh no. Twilight is rubbing off on her a little too much. You're five, darling. Enjoying yourself is your job!!

Just like with the bullet in butt date, Loid cannot understand why Anya looks so angry now after having spent an entire day having fun - and he cataloguing what she seems to be having fun with.

The way that he ends his internal monologue with his fear of the Forgers breaking apart and Operation Strix doesn't cross his mind once, tells a lot about how his priorities are starting to change enough to even silence his "For the Mission" talk. My mans falling hard.

Anya sees how worried Loid has gotten... and maybe she reads even deeper and realizes how genuine of a worry it is? That he's not worried for her as an asset of Operation Strix, but as a kid that deserves to have fun and be happy. And she steps up to reassure him.

And oh, how his face changes! T_T

And the way he alternates between "Loid voice" when he speaks and "Twilight voice" when he thinks. Have I congratulated Takuya Eguchi for this feat yet?

And by the way, he "justifies" Anya being so upset of missing her mama because she's still a "small child". Because of course only small children can miss their mothers, right? Twilight definitely doesn't miss his, right?

Forget neck-deep denial, this man is deep down the Mariana Trench of denial.

And the "Small Daily Life" track from the soundtrack plays, with the beautiful family leitmotif...

I love them. He can be so sweet with Anya, I can only imagine how he'll end up post-identity reveals and especially post-feelings realization.

The final few hours before Olka, Gram and Zeb get safely transferred! I think you can see the tension on their entire faces.

Also some intense, new soundtrack there! Interesting! The composers have done a lot of job this season, carefully mixing up tracks from the previous season with new ones to create the respective mood.

And that's it for this week! I foresee way more action on the next episode! :D

#Spy x Family #sxf reaction

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scekrex · 2 months

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I saw some of your Adam x readers and really enjoyed them! I was wondering if you could do an Adam x reader where the reader is a trans man but still likes to wear dresses, skirts, and has like either medium length or long hair, but is also insecure about the fact that they won't be seen as a real guy. Have a wonderful day/night!

Omg as a trans guy myself writing this was some sort of healing I swear, I adore you for requesting trans reader! Also I hope you like it!

What it takes to be a man

pairing: Adam x transmale!angel!reader

warnings: a lil angst maybe? It's mainly fluff

note: not beta read bc idc

Things were rough up here in heaven, you thought that once you had died things would get easier but they didn't. Your body was still the same, still wrong. Everything was wrong, to be honest. Your voice was still too high for a guy's voice, your chest was still… well, too big for a man's chest and your curves weren't really helpful either. Waist too small, hip bones too pronounced.

When Adam entered the room you flinched for a moment, but only for a moment because as soon as the man entered the room he took his helmet off and greeted you with a cocky smile, “How’s my babe doing?”

You sent a small smile his way, then looked down to your hands. Yeah, how were you doing? That was actually a pretty good question. Not fine, that much you knew. So you said just that, there was no reason for you to lie to Adam after all, “Y’know I thought things would be different here.”

Adam's smile dropped almost immediately, a serious expression took its place. He put down the helmet on the bedside table and sat down next to you. “Yeah? In which way?”

You inhaled loudly, you tried to find the words, tried to explain how you felt, but it was just so hard to find the correct words to express your feelings. “In a ‘my body is still not it's way,” you then chose to say. “I’ve been struggling with that back on earth and I thought that here it might be different, that I'd get here with the body I feel like I should have been born in, you know?”

Well to be completely honest, Adam didn't know, nor did he fully understand the entire concept of body dysmorphia, but he didn't need to understand it, he was trying his best to keep you happy and that was what counted in the end. “Babes, why does it matter what other people think huh? You feel comfortable in dresses and skirts and those slutty crop tops, fuck, you look so fucking hot wearing them too,” his hand came to rest on your knee. He knew that being seen as a guy by others was a big deal to you, he didn't understand why though.

“No but that's the point, I wanna feel comfortable and confident but then people come up to me and tell me ‘what a pretty lady I am’ and I'm so sick and tired of being seen as a lady when I'm really not. I'm a fucking dude just like you're a dude, why can't people just see that?” It was exhausting, really. Because even when you corrected people they would try to take your identity from you, they usually said things like ‘men don't have long hair the way you do’ or ‘you wanna be a man? Then stop dressing like a woman'.

You weren't trying to be a man, you were a man.

“I see it,” Adam said and shot you a small smirk. Your head snapped sideways to look him in the eyes, “You do?” Adam made a hand gesture that was meant to say ‘Isn’t it obvious?’. “When I look at you I see my handsome boyfriend, you don't give two shits, you dress in what you feel comfortable, you wear your hair in ways that make you feel good and hands down, that's the hottest thing you can do, doesn't make you any less of a man.” His wing wrapped around your back softly, the tips of his feathers wrapped over your shoulder to gently pet your cheek. “You’re the most interesting angel I ever got to meet, babes. Don't let these assholes bring you down just because they can't see the most obvious thing.”

You tilted your head slightly, curiously looking up at your boyfriend, “N that is?” “That you're a motherfucking dude, babes,” he spoke like it was the most obvious thing, and to him personally it was. You've always been you, always been a man, nothing could ever change that. His hand slid smoothly through your hair, pushing the long silky strands out of your face. “And if some fuckface ever tries to claim anything else, you're gonna head straight up to me and I'll handle it, got it?” You knew he meant it and it warmed your heart that he cared so much. You leaned against his arm, your head was resting against his shoulder as you whispered a quiet “Thank you”.

#hazbin hotel #hazbin hotel adam #adam x male reader #adam x y/n #adam x you #male reader #adam x reader #trans reader

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snapscube · 8 months

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i don't know if you said so on your recent Web of Shadows stream, but what are your thoughts on Insomniac's more casual style of web swinging vs. the more difficult, physics-based web swinging? I've been avoiding Spider-Man 2 footage, so I haven't seen any web swinging, but I'd love if they could incorporate some risk/reward aspect to make swinging more engaging.

i think there's been a big push from spider-man game fans to re-contextualize Insomniac's web swinging as underwhelming and too casual that's kinda unnecessary and does it a big disservice. THAT IS NOT TO SAY that there haven't always been people who don't prefer the very low skill floor and relatively low skill ceiling of those titles, and that's also not to say that it isn't a fair assessment when looking at swinging mechanics in a vacuum. something like Web of Shadows ABSOLUTELY has a lot more rewarding moments of web swinging because of its higher skill floor, and when you really get a feel for the mechanics you can pull off some crazy stuff that it feels like insomniac's take isn't even dreaming of.

HOWEVER, i reiterate, this is all totally true and not exactly in Insomniac's in favor when examined in a vacuum, but in reality these mechanics DON'T exist in a vacuum. they're very important yes, they're how you're gonna spend a majority of your time in game yes, so it's important that they have a baseline level of fun and satisfying enough risk/reward to sustain an entire playthrough, or maybe even multiple. but Insomniac's swinging mechanics are in service of a game that not only does MORE with its open world than many others previously, but also does pretty much everything else a LOT better. Insomniac's take feels a lot more like it's in service of creating a much more approachable Spider-Man sim, where you don't have to necessarily "figure out" the swinging mechanics as much as you might in WoS or in SM2 (PS2) because there's a lot of content they want you to be spending more of your time on, and they need you to feel like you are playing an extremely capable and seasoned version of Peter.

playing through even just the opening of Web of Shadows on stream this week really drove home how much the world just feels so empty in comparison. the swinging was admittedly more fun at times!! but that kinda ended up being the saving grace of an experience that otherwise is feeling very bare-bones. and ultimately, as much as i PERSONALLY like mechanics with a bit more physicality, and i don't necessarily think that needs to be at odds with a larger amount of other content, i think my point is that i don't necessarily consider the swinging a FLAW of the Insomniac games, just a representation of the design philosophy of this take. and the design philosophy happens to be one i really appreciate. they want you in there DOING stuff, sure swinging around idly is fun and it's a great way to get you from point A to point B in a more exhilarating fashion than a lot of games even come close to, but these games have a much wider target audience and i don't know how much the average person cares more about the physicality of swinging as much as they care about it being an easy way for them to..... *sigh* feel like spider-man while traversing a larger set of activities.

THAT BEING SAID.... the improvements so far in Spider-Man 2 look SO SO SO GOOD and they will come MUCH appreciated. It looks so much faster. I straight up might turn on fall damage for my playthrough, which IS a new option they added. it's gonna rule.

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lordystrange · 1 year

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10 best byler proofs by me

10. The cast, especially David (who knows the ending) and Finn (who might know something), are always so happy talking about Byler. They wouldn’t be if Will ended up dying alone as a sad gay. Also no one likes milkvan except maybe Millie unless she’s acting… Caleb even said ”Lucas and Max’s love is real unlike Milkvan’s”.

9. Mike has been queercoded throughout the whole series. Especially with queer colors, he spent s4 dressed as a gay pride flag. Also bi and pan colors are associated with him. Also Ted’s ”our son with a girl?” and everything Eddie said about forced conformity etc

8. Byler parallelling other romantic ships like Jancy, Jopper and Lumax. I’m not listing examples because there are SO MANY! (Also Milkvan parallelling all the platonic/dead ships)

7. Mileven being bones. We have nothing that shows their actual, deep love they’re ”supposed to have”. We don’t know what Mike loves about El and what El loves about Mike. We don’t know what makes them a compatible match romantically. We only know things that don’t make them compatible: El feeling the need to lie to Mike, Mike feeling embarrassed of his nerdy self with El, El feeling unloved by Mike, Mike feeling inferior to El…

6. The desert scenes. The triple take ofc, but also the car roof top convo with Will (jancy parallell). Will is talking about how it’s scary to say how you really feel because what if they don’t like the truth. And Mike NODS. If the truth was that he loved El exactly like El wanted, El would like that truth. So what is the truth Mike is worried that El doesn’t like…?

5. Mike’s monologue. He had to be pushed by Will to open his mouth. He lied about him loving her at first sight. He copied the t-shirt part from Eddie. He kept saying she’s his superhero which El doesn’t wanna be. He didn’t include anything personal about El and their relationship after the t-shirt thing… Also El didn’t seem to like what she heard and their love didn’t save the world. And they didn’t even talk after it. And while filming it they didn’t focus on just the couple (like they did with byler in s2 shed scene) and they let Finn improvise as if it wasn’t that important (as important as the van scene…)

4. Mike would be so poorly written if he wasn’t into Will and I don’t think the Duffers would just ignore his character. Also all the lip glances and heart eyes wouldn’t make sense.

3. Byler/Milkvan contrast. When Will was gone and they found his ”body”, Mike heard Will breathing in a radio channel and believed he was alive. He didn’t rest for a second, he did everything he could to find him. When he thought El was dead, he didn’t go looking for her, even tho a couple times he actually saw her. Also in s3 when Milkvan had a fight, Max said Mike will be crawling back to her begging for forgiveness in no time. Instead Mike laid on a sofa and ate and complained. When Byler had a fight… well we all know what Mike did then.

2. Mike and Will’s relationship has always been different from other friendships. They’ve said it themselves (”pls don’t tell the others, they wouldn’t understand”, ”Hawkins is not the same without you”, ”you make her me feel better for being different”). Also their scenes together have always been a big deal (van scene took an entire day to film, crazy together was written before s1 was even filmed) and they are shot in a really romantic way (music, lighting…)

1. In the beginning of s3, Will said to Joyce that he’s not gonna fall in love. That made his arc about romance. We know now that he already fell in love, but he doesn’t believe it’s requited. If s5 goes from ”i don’t think he loves me back” to ”he doesn’t love me back” we get literally nowhere and the entire storyline (since s1) would be useless and waste of time and money. They wouldn’t make Will suffer 4 seasons and then suffer some more. So believe me when I say it goes ”I don’t think he loves me back” to ”He does love me back!”

I wish you all a very merry byler endgame in s5! 💚

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shion-yu · 2 months

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A Safe Place (part 1) [Day 28]

Cliff shows up at Elliot's doorstep in the middle of the night soaked to the bone. A Cliff/Elliot sickfic heavy on the angst, also ft. Theo. For @monthofsick Day 28: Chaotic body temperature. I know, not me joining in on a writing challenge right at the end but it fit so well. 3,065 words, original work, TWs for homophobia, emeto (neither strong warnings, but the sick will get much sicker in p2).

It had been a long summer. Cliff had spent it working at Theo's law firm again, except this time he wasn't an unpaid intern but a legal secretary. It was a temporary job that they had offered him when his summer break had aligned perfectly with one of the secretary's maternity leaves and Cliff had jumped at the chance to work in such a great environment again. He was happy to see many familiar faces from last year, and to his surprise they were happy to see him too. Although he was mainly working with one of the other partners this time - not Theo - he saw the lawyer nearly every day and was relieved to learn both Theo and his partner, Al, were in good health. Al had gotten a double lung transplant that last Fall, Theo told Cliff. He and his new lungs were doing great.

"What about you?" Theo asked Cliff eagerly. "How did your first year at NYU go?"

Cliff smiled, automatically thinking of Elliot. "It was great," he said. "My classes were interesting but not too hard."

"You look happier," Theo said, surprising Cliff with how true the observation was. "Did something cause that?"

"Yeah," Cliff said thoughtfully. "Someone did."

Being apart from Elliot that summer was difficult. He missed hugging and kissing Elliot every single day. He wanted to talk to him on the phone for hours and hours just to hear his voice and fall asleep with his fingers in Elliot’s curls. But when he was living at home, Cliff knew he had to be the perfect, straight laced child he'd been raised as. In other words, he couldn't be himself. He wore business attire to work every day, but the soft sweaters and cute hair clips he'd amassed over the past year stayed packed away in his college stuff for next semester. He didn't think his parents would appreciate those particular fashion choices he'd been making.

It's not like his parents made it hard to hide things. They hardly ever asked questions, and if they did it was about grades or tuition. Cliff knew he was incredibly lucky that his parents paid his entire tuition, room and board as if it were a given. Elliot's parents weren't able to help much financially, meaning his boyfriend had to take out loans and work part time while in school. This summer he was working nonstop in his dad's auto mechanic shop, saving up money. Often when Cliff video called Elliot these days he was covered in sweat, streaks of black motor oil on his face. It seemed wrong to complain about his parents when it was thanks to them that he was only working this summer because he wanted to, not because he had to. And yet, silently, Cliff thought maybe he'd be happier if he was in Elliot's shoes - without much money but with a place he could really call home. It was a selfish, privileged thought and Cliff refused to voice it, but it creeped in each time he heard Elliot's mom call in the background, "Boys, wash up, it's time for dinner!"

Working was a blessing to Cliff, because if he'd been at home he would've been in that big, lonely house all by himself most of the summer. Being at the law firm was not only a distraction, but comfortable. Despite wearing a suit, Cliff actually felt less tense there than at his parents' house. He stayed long hours, longer than he needed to, because he preferred the sound of printers and fax machines over his parents screaming at each other downstairs. When he was in high school it seemed easier to ignore. Maybe it was because he'd had a break for so many months that returning to it seemed worse than before. Or maybe it was because Elliot never screamed at him like that, and Cliff had started to realize that this wasn't how things had to be.

Around the beginning of August, Cliff caught a cold that didn't seem to go away. At first it was just the sniffles, and then it was a cough that grew progressively deeper with each week that passed. The other employees started asking him if he was alright, and embarrassingly Theo caught him staring blankly at the water fountain one day for far too long. Cliff was so out of it that he didn't even notice Theo calling his name until the older man waved his hand in Cliff's face.

"Oh," Cliff said, rubbing his eyes to try and make his blurry vision clear up. "Sorry, I was just... Daydreaming."

"You look pale," Theo said, and before Cliff could step back Theo had placed a hand on Cliff's forehead while ignoring Cliff's protest that he was fine. "Hmm, you feel a little feverish. Why don't you go home, kid?"

"I'm really fine," Cliff said, wildly embarrassed. "It's just a cold."

Theo looked him up and down, clearly assessing how pushy he should be. "At least go take a nap on the couch in my office, you look exhausted."

Usually, Cliff would say no immediately. He wouldn't even consider showing weakness at the place he was supposed to be making a vitally good impression at for his career. But he felt weak and a little dizzy and found himself saying in a small voice, "...If you're sure."

Theo was sure. He brought Cliff to his office and shut the blinds so there wasn't much light coming through the many glass windows. He even tossed a blanket to the eighteen-year-old. "I sleep here all the time," he reassured Cliff. "You can't work if you're too tired to think. Don't worry about it."

Cliff felt guilty for taking over Theo's office, but Theo headed out for a two hour meeting and Cliff was left alone on the couch. He had half a mind to leave and get back to work at his desk now that there was no one stopping him, but just sitting there made him realize how fatigued his whole body felt. A little nap wouldn't hurt, he reasoned. A really short one. He lay down and fell asleep so quickly that he didn't even remember closing his eyes.

He woke up to Theo gently rubbing his shoulder. Cliff was confused, then his eyes widened in embarrassment and he sat up. Shit, had it been two hours already? Wait, that clock didn't say 5pm did it? - surely he hadn't slept for four hours?!

"Woah, it's okay Cliff," Theo said quickly, "You seemed really tired so I let you sleep. You should go home now, everybody's leaving for the day."

"I'm so sorry," Cliff gushed, face bright red. "I didn't mean to sleep so long. You don't have to pay me for today - please don't, actually."

"Settle down, it's really fine," Theo said in a calm voice that made Cliff remember to take a deep breath like Elliot had taught him to calm down. "We all have off days. You don't feel so warm now, so that's good. Stay home tomorrow though."

"That's totally not necessary," Cliff said, his confident tone supplemented by a very unconvincing round of dry coughs. He waved off the tissues Elliot tried to hand him. "Really, I'm fine. I've just been having some asthma since I got sick last winter, but my boy-" Cliff stopped himself, realizing he was about to out himself. "My, um, my roommate got me an inhaler so I just have to use it that's all."

"Your boyfriend," Elliot supplied gently. "It's okay to say it, Cliff. You know I have Al."

Cliff wanted to deny the comment outright. He wanted to laugh and say Elliot really was just a friend. But Theo had such an earnest expression, and he was the only successful adult man Cliff knew of who was gay. "I know, but, it's really not, not for me," Cliff found himself saying, voice wavering. "I-I have to go. Sorry I slept in your office so long," he said as he hurried out, ignoring Theo's all too kind voice calling after him. Cliff knew in a certain world that it was okay, but it wasn't his world. Not the world where he still relied on his parents.

Despite saying he'd be back the next day, Cliff did stay home that Friday. His fever was worse and he had chills that left him huddled under the covers. His mom didn't notice he didn't leave the house and he didn't tell her. She didn't need to know, just like she didn't need to know about Elliot. She had never supported Cliff in anything at all, so why... Why did Cliff feel such a strong urge to tell her?

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~

On the last day of Cliff's work at the law firm, Theo told Cliff if he ever needed a reference, he'd get a glowing one from him. And if he ever needed to talk about anything, anything at all, Cliff could call him too. Cliff knew what he was getting at, and he didn't want to face it. But Theo was such a calm person that it was disarming, and Cliff asked without meaning to, "Is it worth it?"

Theo nodded. He knew what Cliff meant without specification. "Yes, it's worth it," Theo said. "Even if there's nay-sayers and you lose people, you gain much more. It's always worth it to be exactly who you are, Cliff."

Cliff went back to his parents house with those words echoing in his brain. Theo, a successful and respected lawyer, said it was worth it. He had a career and a person who loved him by his side. Was that something Cliff could have, too? Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to be honest, just once?

"Mom," Cliff said over dinner, pushing his phone over to her with a picture of him and Elliot together on the screen. "I want to tell you something. This is my-"

"Don't do this to me Cliff," his mother interrupted before he could finish. "You've already caused enough trouble. He's not - just because you have a thing with another guy doesn't mean anything."

"It's not a thing mom. I love him," Cliff found himself saying angrily. And oh, why did he say that? The first time he finally said he loved Elliot and it was directed at his mom in spite. It wasn't supposed to be like this.

"Cliff, you don't love him. You're too old to be playing this game. Now I'll forget we had this conversation. And don't tell your father."

Cliff saw red. He'd never been so angry in his life. He snatched his phone back and grabbed his wallet on the shelf by the door and went outside. She didn't follow him.

It was pouring rain. Cliff shivered, wishing he'd had the forethought to grab a coat too, but he wasn't going to ruin his dramatic exit by going back inside. Of course his mother hadn't approved. Cliff hadn't expected her to. But he'd expected her to get angry - not to dismiss him all together like he was just a kid with a big imagination. Cliff knew then that she would never really think of him as his own person, and he couldn't do anything to change that. It broke his heart.

Cliff walked for a very long time. He didn't quite know where he was going, only that he wanted to get as far away from that house as possible. He found himself at a park by the water where he beat up a couple of tree trunks that definitely won based on his bleeding knuckles afterwards. The rain didn't let up, and Cliff found himself getting progressively colder. His cough from earlier that month had never gone away and his breath began to catch on what felt like a dry patch in his throat. Cliff realized then that he'd left his inhaler at the house, too. The coughing grew more desperate until he pitched forward and vomited onto the grass he was standing on. He groaned and leaned against the nearest tree he could find, the contents of his stomach mixing with rushing rain water and swept away quickly. He continued to gag for several minutes until the coughing abated ever so slightly. He felt weak and pathetic. And also very, very alone.

He needed to get somewhere dry. Somewhere warm and safe. Cliff only had one place like that in mind. He boarded train after train, shivering in the corner like a wet dog as he made his way all the way to Long Island. He knew Elliot's address because he'd been sending Elliot mail all summer, little love notes and presents that made Cliff think of him. He never included a return address though, because he hadn't wanted his parents to see. Thankfully his phone had enough battery to direct him to Elliot's doorstep despite the wet four hour commute, and he found himself at the front door of a modest suburban home at 3:30 in the morning.

The journey had felt like a daze. Cliff had never done something so erratic, so unplanned. He raised his hand to knock before remembering what time it was, and Elliot had parents and sister who probably wouldn't appreciate him knocking. He called Elliot instead, his phone barely hanging on at 5%. He thought to himself that it seemed unlikely that Elliot would answer at this time of night. But after several rings, by which time Cliff had resigned himself to waiting for dawn under a tree, a very sleepy voice picked up.

"Cliff?"

"Elliot? Sorry to bother you," Cliff said, as if this entire situation weren't incredibly bizarre. "But I'm at your door."

There was a long pause, presumably while Elliot tried to figure out exactly what Cliff meant by 'at your door'. "Like right now? Now?"

"Yeah," Cliff said. "Do you think I could sleep over?"

"I'm coming down," Elliot said, and there was the rustling of sheets and then the thump of footsteps as Elliot ran downstairs. The front door opened and Elliot hung up. Cliff looked at him and thought he was the most beautiful person in the entire world. "Holy crap, you're really here," Elliot breathed. "God Cliff, what happened? No, come in first, you're soaked..."

Elliot pulled Cliff inside and helped Cliff take off his soaked trainers. There were traces of vomit on the front of his shirt and his fingers were still bloody. Elliot brought him to the bathroom, motioning for Cliff to stay quiet with one finger to his lips. He grabbed a towel from under the sink and wrapped it around the shorter boy, who was shivering violently from the marked change in temperature. In the bright light of the kitchen, suddenly his journey seemed a lot less valiant and a lot more stupid. "Sit," Elliot said, sitting Cliff on the toilet. "You're freezing... Can you take your temperature?”

Elliot handed Cliff a thermometer, which Cliff obediently used. After a few seconds it beeped and read ‘96.9.’ Elliot frowned. “Hot shower, okay?" Despite being woken up in the middle of the night, Elliot seemed fully alert. Cliff nodded and peeled off his wet and dirty clothes. He coughed roughly as he did so, a slight wheeze audible on the end of the exhale. Elliot patted his back with a concerned expression. "Do you have your inhaler?" Cliff shook his head no. Elliot grimaced and ran the hot water for Cliff. "You warm up. I'm gonna find you some clothes and I think there's an old inhaler somewhere in the medicine cabinet..."

Elliot moved to leave, but Cliff grabbed his arm before he could go. "Don't wake your family up," Cliff said hoarsely. "I'm okay."

Elliot looked at Cliff in concern and sighed. "Cliff, you just showed up soaking wet in the middle of the night. You live all the way in Newark. I'm gonna be a little concerned. But right now you need to warm up. We can talk later."

"Okay," Cliff said. He took the hottest shower of his life then, and it felt glorious. After a few minutes he started to feel dizzy though and sat on the floor of the tub. Elliot came back and peeked around the curtain, frowning when he saw Cliff sitting there.

"Are you awake?" Elliot asked worriedly.

"Hmm," Cliff hummed in confirmation. "Just feels nice, and I got sleepy."

"Finish up in there," Elliot said. "I've got sweats and a hot water bottle and bed waiting for you."

Cliff obediently finished showering and sat on the edge of the tub as Elliot dried him off thoroughly with two big, fluffy towels. Cliff closed his eyes and remembered how many times he'd imagined being together again over the summer. "I missed you so much," Cliff said, resting his face on Elliot's abdomen.

Elliot stilled and crouched in front of Cliff. "I missed you too," he said softly. "Now arms up." Elliot helped Cliff get into the warmest sweats that he owned and then led Cliff upstairs to his bedroom. The house was quiet, and Cliff hoped that meant he hadn't disturbed anyone else's sleep. He glanced around curiously at Elliot's childhood bedroom, which was decorated in a way that seemed so very Elliot. He smiled at the teddy bear sitting on the dresser that Cliff had bought Elliot at the baseball game they'd been to. It brought back good memories, nothing like the ones that had been swirling around in Cliff's head for the past several rainy hours.

"Bed," Elliot whispered, tucking Cliff under the duvet and several extra blankets. Cliff was still shivering, but less so now. His temperature had blown from low numbers to high and he gazed at Elliot with glassy, feverish eyes. Elliot handed Cliff a very expired albuterol inhaler, which Cliff took a few puffs of. Despite the date stamped on the canister, it still eased the tightness in Cliff's chest a little. Elliot then climbed in next to him and wrapped his arms around Cliff. The feeling and smell of being enveloped by Elliot after all this time brought Cliff to tears and he hid his face.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I know I should have called.”

"It’s okay,” Elliot said. “Sleep, Cliff. We can talk tomorrow.” Knowing he was finally in the only place he truly felt safe, Cliff slept.

[Cont. part 2]

#shionwrites #novemetober rescheduled #whump #sickfic #sicknario #tw: emeto #tw: homophobia #prompt: chaotic body temperature #novemetober 2023 #oc: cliff #oc: theo #oc: elliot #fever whump #hurt/comfort #angst #hypothermia #pneumonia

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blossomwritesthings · 1 year

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𝐝𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐝? 𝐢𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞. | 𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐦 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐟𝐭

pairing: minho x fem!reader (afab)

genre: veterinarian!minho (this includes a few of the skz members working in his clinic). client!reader. hurt/comfort. angst. fluff. smut - MDNI, 18+ only. reader pov. strangers to lovers au. slowburn romance. lots of pining.

content & warnings: explicit & strong language. very thematic elements. minho is reader's vet. reader's childhood cat suddenly gets diagnosed with cancer, and she has to make a big decision about what to do. this fanfic includes heavy topics like: pet euthanasia, extreme loss/grief, depression, the problems with pet healthcare, and more. there will be some humor/fluff placed throughout, and also smut somewhere along the way. :))

18+ warnings: masterbation. sexual fantasies. kinda perv behavior but not really??

word count: 3.0k

summary: dr. lee minho is known throughout your area as the city's hottest veterinarian, and he's also the very man that's been taking good care of your two cats for the past three years. but one day, you're thrown down a dark path of heartache when the cat that you've grown up with - nyx - is diagnosed with an acute form of bone cancer. burdened with the hardest decision of your entire life, you come at a crossroads of what to do. and throughout it all, minho is the single most person who continually stays by your side.

a/n: i seriously contemplated on whether or not I should post this chapter, after all of the events of this week. I want to make sure that I am cautious and sensitive to everyone during such a painful time. but in the end, I decided to post this since perhaps, it might help a few of you out there who are dealing with so many emotions right now. I cried while I was writing this last week because it brought up so many feelings that I felt when I had to put down my dog almost 2 years ago. so if this chapter make you sad, please don't feel bad about that or think that you're alone, because I swear that you're not. next week's chapter will be a little bit on the lighter side of things (but just barely). take care of yourselves, okay?? take everything one day at a time. allow yourself to feel a plethora of things, or nothing at all. everyone is different and processes things at a variety of paces. this isn't a race, this is life. and as always, my asks/dms are always open if you just need to vent to a listening ear. I love you guys, and... stay strong, yeah?? ❤️

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ᴅᴏ ɴᴏᴛ ʀᴇᴘᴏsᴛ ᴛᴏ ᴏᴛʜᴇʀ sɪᴛᴇs (ᴛʜɪs ɪɴᴄʟᴜᴅᴇs ᴛʀᴀɴsʟᴀᴛɪᴏɴs). ©ʙʟᴏssᴏᴍᴡʀɪᴛᴇsᴛʜɪɴɢs ⤐ ᴀʟʟ ʀɪɢʜᴛs ʀᴇsᴇʀᴠᴇᴅ

You decided to schedule the appointment on a Sunday afternoon, that way you’d be off of work. Since the night you had spent with Dr. Lee in the waiting room after hours three weeks before, he had continually checked up on you throughout the weeks by way of numerous phone calls. And it felt like, with each one that passed, they seemed to grow longer, as the two of you talked about everything and nothing - all in hopes of trying to get your mind off of the imminent date.

From your daily phone calls, you had gleaned some valuable information from Dr. Lee - like the fact that he had been single since he opened up the clinic three years prior since it was pretty hard to keep up a long-term relationship when he was so busy with clients and managing a successful business.

You didn’t even know how the topic of romantic adventures came up in your daily wellness calls, but all at once, you were confiding in Dr. Lee about your most recent boyfriend which had broken up with back in university. But you didn’t go into too much detail about the relationship, and you skimmed over the… bad parts of it all.

You alluded to your horrible breakup with your ex during the conversation, and you briefly mentioned your ex’s awful treatment of you at the very end of the relationship - but you never crossed the line of professionalism and confessed to all the bitterness you still held for your ex. No, you didn’t think Dr. Lee needed to know such intimate details about your life. But also, he probably wouldn’t care. After all, the phone calls were only a means to an end…

And besides, no one else in the entire world knew the extent of your old relationship, so you didn’t see any point in telling a random veterinarian about such a dark part of your past.

The calls seemed to help somewhat - if only to take your mind off of the looming date. But then, as soon as Dr. Lee hung up, your thoughts were clouded with the pain of losing Nyx all over again.

Slowly, you were watching her deteriorate. Dr. Lee warned you that things would go downhill quite fast, and fast they did - since Nyx hardly wanted to eat her meals anymore, even when you’d try to coax her with her favorite treat of a fresh sardine. She was incredibly lethargic and because of the weight loss that she experienced from the lack of an appetite, her thinness only caused more pressure to be put on her legs, which was where the cancer was located.

Throughout it all, Dr. Lee did a tremendous job of preparing you for the day - the day that you were expecting to take the place in your mind as the worst moment in your entire life. The two of you planned it so that his schedule was completely free for the procedure. Originally, he told you that he usually doesn't accompany his clients into the euthanization room, and instead leaves it up to the vet techs to take care of the protocol. But without you even having to ask him, he assured you that he’d be with you the entire time - that he’d be the administer of the drug. Because he already knew, that having anyone else there with you wouldn’t help, not in the least bit. Sure, Yongbok and Hyunjin and Seungmin were good techs, but nothing could compare to the utterly calming presence that Dr. Lee alluded… with his soft, brown eyes and his slight smile and-

You were thinking about him again- damn it.

Because besides being cluttered with the pain of losing Nyx, your mind was also full of so many thoughts about… him.

And how, ever since that night in the clinic, he had continued to call you by your first name. No honorifics, no pretense. And even though he felt familiar and warm to you, you still felt somewhat uncomfortable to drop the doctor title. You wondered if he thought it was odd, how he was addressing you informally, and yet you were still doing the ‘keep it professional’ bit.

When you were busy working at your desk throughout the day, you found your eyes constantly moving over to the side to check your phone. To see if he had called you.

While you were eating your packed lunch by yourself in your office’s break room, your mind kept replaying the way that it had felt, when he had touched you that night - with those slender fingers and warm palms of his.

When you were lounging on your apartment’s small sofa, watching tv before you went to bed, your thoughts drifted off to the sound of his voice, and the way that he always said your name so delicately.

But perhaps worse of them all, is what you would do late at night, when you lay wide awake wrapped up in your duvet covers in bed. Because instead of thinking about Nyx, your musings drifted off to him, yet again.

And perhaps it had something to do with your exhaustion from the end of the day,

Or the fact that it was so very dark in your bedroom,

But more often than not, your imagination would get the best of you, and all at once, things were turning deeper, dimmer…

Flashes of him, and that smile that he always gave you when he first saw you during a visit, danced across your vision,

As you imagined what he’d look like, staring you down, bright eyes glued to your exposed self.

You dreamed about that pretty, red mouth of his, lips turning kiss-swollen and sticky from your very essence.

You wondered how it’d feel, to have him towering over you, whispering sinful words into your ear with that sly tongue of his, as he pressed you further down into the bedsheets.

And when those thoughts came upon you, you just… couldn’t help yourself.

Hand playing with yourself-

Grazing over pert buds,

Tickling a sensitive waist,

Spreading swollen lips,

Brushing against a throbbing knot,

Pushing past folds and curving inward.

And every time, the only thing that crossed your mind, was him.

Him - and his smell and his voice and his built frame.

In those heated moments of twilight, you only ever made one single sound as you thrashed about between your thick duvet covers…

“Minho.”

The name fell from your bitten-raw lips in whispers, cries, and pleas.

Maybe it was because you hadn’t been with a man in so long,

Or maybe it was because you were a grown woman and so naturally, you were extremely horny most of the time.

But all at once, as you delved into such fantasies late at night, you realized that the attraction to him had always been there.

You had just tried to mask it with honorifics and professionalism since you didn’t want to cross any lines. Since you figured that a man of his stature - of wealth and success - would never stoop so low to date a woman like yourself.

Even still, none of that stopped you.

Stopped your midnight explorations or the way that he seemed to inherently infect your very being with every breath that you took throughout the day.

But eventually, the crest of sadness took over everything again, as the day finally came to a head. To your relief, the weather outside on that Sunday afternoon was bright and sunny. You didn’t know what you’d do with yourself if it had been grey and drizzling.

You stopped just outside of the clinic’s doors, forcing yourself to take a good look at it all, as you held Nyx in her carrier at your side. It’d be the last time that you stepped through these doors with her in hand.

And that’s when the tears started. They silently traced down your cheeks, even as you shuffled through the clinic’s front doors slowly. The bell above your head signaled your arrival, and as if on cue, Jisung and Chan’s heads turned in unison from their computers at the front desk to where you stood at the entrance of the clinic.

In an instant, Jisung was getting out of his chair and flitting over to you. “Hi, Y/N,” he said in a soft voice, offering you a gentle smile. “Hi, Nyx.” He bent down in front of you, peering into the black carrier and cooing at your cat.

“How long is the wait time?” You asked, voice shaky as you clutched a little harder on the handle of the carrier.

Jisung peered up at you then, his big, doe-like brown eyes shining with compassion. “About ten minutes.”

You nodded without saying another word, as you began to make your way over to the front desk to check in for your appointment. The entire time you spoke with Jisung, Chan had been watching the two of you in silence, assessing the atmosphere and displaying a compassionate face.

“Ji said it’s gonna be ten minutes.” Is all you said, as you stood in front of the wooden front desk. You couldn’t meet their eyes anymore, your vision too blurry with tears. And frankly, their pity just made you feel even worse just then.

“Yeah, that’s about right,” Chan began, typing away at his computer. Then he slid over a clipboard and had you sign your name at the end of the document. Signing away on the procedure. Signing away on Nyx’s life. “And… I’m so sorry, Y/N.”

“Me too.” You whispered before you were pulling away from them and taking a seat near the doors to the back of the clinic. Usually, while you waited for your appointment, you’d scroll through social media on your phone or pick up a nearby magazine and peruse the articles.

This time, you just sat there. You sat there in utter despair and silence, before deciding to pull out Nyx from her carrier. She was a little less warm than she had always been, and the thinnest you had ever seen her. Even still, she looked beautiful to you. You pressed your face into her midnight-black fur, taking in the sweet smell of her and nuzzling into her pliable skin.

“I love you so much, girl,” you muttered into her coat, before giving her a few kisses. “I’m sorry I couldn’t do more for you…”

The minutes ticked by slowly after that, as you clutched on protectively to Nyx. As you kissed your childhood best friend. As you fought for the last seconds spent with the single most stable thing in your entire life.

And then, you heard the fateful call of your name ring out across the waiting room. You stood from your chair, muscles moving like they were trapped in a vat of sticky molasses. Your gaze was fixated on the ground at your feet, so you didn’t see who had called your name.

“Right this way,” it was Hyunjin’s angelic-like voice that graced your ears, as you walked through the threshold and into the back hallway of the clinic. You felt his hand land atop your shoulder, his slender fingers gently squeezing there in a soothing gesture.

Then he was leading you through the back hallways, past the examination rooms that you had sat in with Nyx countless times. Finally, he stopped just in front of a door that was painted in a baby-blue color.

“The doctor will be right with you,” Hyunjin began, his tone ghostly-faint and fading away behind you as your eyes locked with the room you were about to be left alone in. “I’ll be right here when you’re done.”

You didn’t even register the door being shut closed behind you, too focused on the decorations that were placed throughout the room. The walls were painted a sky-blue, with a beautiful stain-glass window in the center of the room. The scene depicted a magnificent sunset, bursting with colors that were burnt cayennes and violets. The room was quite small, but the bright, real flowers placed throughout the area helped to add life to the otherwise depressing atmosphere - with their brilliant yellows and reds. Just underneath the stained glass window was a small pedestal that was covered in a thick duvet and plastic rap, and off in the corner of the room was a sliding glass window with a curtain shielding the other side of the glass.

You sat down on the nearby bench, looking at everything around you. Looking at the pedestal that was before you - where Nyx would be laid to rest. And it felt like your heart was bleeding irrevocably inside of your chest, straining and pumping at the same time as you tried to come to terms with the situation at hand.

At least she was going to join the afterlife in a safe space - at least it was beautiful looking and-

Your thoughts were interrupted by the shutting of the door that you had originally walked through. Lifting your head from Nyx who was peacefully dozing in your arms, you came face-to-face with Dr. Lee. He was dressed in his usual garb of black slacks and a white doctor's coat.

“How are you doing, Y/N?” Was the first thing he asked, as he shut the door behind him and neared you. He knelt in front of your knees, taking both of your hands in his and giving them a gentle squeeze.

That’s when you managed to find the courage to look up into his eyes finally, and the heartache and pain that you found there just made it hurt a little bit more. You felt your bottom lip quake, as the sobs freely flowed from you. You didn’t even have to reply since he already knew how difficult this was for you. So he kept quiet, not moving from his position in front of you and holding onto you as you cried yourself to exhaustion.

“I-I’m ready,” you finally said, roughly scrubbing at your eyes with the palm of one of your hands to try and knock some sense into yourself.

“Are you sure?” He questioned, the concern dripping in his voice from the way that it deepened somewhat.

You nodded furiously, heart hurting so much that it felt like you were going to drop dead from a heart attack any minute. “Y-Yeah.”

Then his hands were slipping away from yours, leaving a fierce shiver to course down the length of your spine at the absence of his touch. He stood close to the curtained window and tapped on the glass once, and you turned your head to the side just in time to glimpse Yongbok pushing the glass aside before he handed over a metal dish that had a small syringe placed in it.

You swallowed around the huge lump that was forming in your dry throat. And when Yongbok offered you a sincere, comforting smile, all you could do was nod once before he was shutting the glass door again, pulling the curtain closed to give you and Dr. Lee some privacy.

Then it was all happening at once - too quickly for you to even grasp - as Dr. Lee was gently taking Nyx from your grasp and laying her down on the cushioned pedestal. She put up no resistance and nudged her little black nose into the palm of his hands, purring in satisfaction. She had always had a soft spot for the doctor.

You stumbled over to her, grabbing hold of one of her paws and squeezing it delicately. You peered up at Dr. Lee through hazy eyes, his face a blotch of color shining through your tear-stained vision. “P-Promise me it’ll be painless, doctor. You- you have to promise me…” Your voice broke off at the end of your words, as you leaned down into Nyx and pressed kiss after kiss into her silky fur.

“She won’t feel a thing, Y/N. I promise.” You heard Dr. Lee say before he was moving again, picking up one of her paws in bated silence. You felt his eyes on you, as you cried into Nyx’s warm skin for the last time.

“I love you so much, girl…” You whispered, voice barely audible to your ears. Cracking irrevocably. “I’ll see you again someday- so... just wait for me there, yeah?”

Then, almost like she could understand your words, Nyx moved her head over to your neck and nuzzled into you, purring lowly. The sobs wracked through your body, as you felt Dr. Lee leaning into her at the same time as you held her close.

You squeezed your eyes shut, like if you closed them long enough, everything would disappear.

The pain,

The loss,

The fear.

And then just like that, Dr. Lee was sighing heavily, a metric ton of agonizing weight in just his breathing alone. “It’s done.”

In the blink of an eye, it was all over.

You clutched onto Nyx’s languid body, holding onto her for dear life. Perhaps, if you held her long enough, she’d come back.

But nothing happened.

There was no more purring,

Or meowing,

Or scratching.

Just…

Utterly nothing.

Silence.

And that was the worst part about it all.

“It hurts,” you began, voice not even sounding like your own from all of the dryness and the crying, “it hurts so fucking much.”

You were shaking your head then, still clutching at one of Nyx’s little pink paws. Then you felt arms wrap around your waist, pulling you against a firm chest. Hands clutched at your sides, and you all but turned around to bury your face into the warmth of Dr. Lee.

“I know,” he said in a hushed tone, his deep, melodic voice so close to your ear that it sent a ripple of shivers across your skin. “I know it hurts, Y/N, but I’m here…”

And then you could do nothing more,

As a new wave of grief washed over you,

Suffocating the very air right out of your lungs,

Drying out your entire being,

Causing the dull pain of a bad headache to bloom across either of your temples.

All you could do at that point was cry and cry and cry, your entire body violently shaking as you held onto Dr. Lee for dear life. And he made no point of pulling away from you. Almost like, he had planned to be there all along.

To be continued...

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🌾 tags: @sleepyleeji :: @if-spearb :: @hyunes4ngel :: @drhsthl :: @seosalad

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beetlebug-bii · 11 months

Note

Hello! Can we get the next part in feral child MC please? It's very cute and now I'm excited it's okay if you can't I don't want to make you uncomfortable. I hope you have a wonderful day or night or whatever wherever you are! 😁

Feral Child Mc (unfortunately) Goes To School

A/N: of course! I hope you enjoy, I haven't slept in like two days and its two in the morning so xdtfyg I hope you enjoy starling! also I love your username so much hehehe

Content Warnings: Swearing, mentions of weed, biting, feral behavior written by a dumbass, silly goofy eepy times

REQUESTS ARE OPEN, FEEL FREE TO ASK TO YOUR HEARTS CONTENT -- p.s. previous Feral MC story at the end!

Do not ask me

How

You managed

In one week, one measly week

How the FUCK YOU MANAGED TO SET THE HOUSE ON FIRE SIX TIMES

FLOOD IT THRICE

AND SOMEHOW HOT BOX LUCIFER'S ROOM

no okay I know how that last one happened and it was Lucifers breaking point

Let's just say

You and Satan have a very...

Let's say complex relationship

Some days you're so ready to beat the shit out of one another it's a shocker that nobody has died yet

Other days the brothers live in fear

They can hear the two of you scrumbling in the walls desperately, gnawing at the wooden beams and gnashing your teeth at the thought of causing the entire building to crumble, leaving the two of you to sit upon your throne of rubble and bone...

Yeah the brothers DO N O T

Appreciate Big Brother Satan bonding time

Now you would never have thought to hotbox Lucifers room on your own, honestly Satan was pretty surprised you came to him with the idea and even knew what it was and like yeah he was absolutely gonna help you with that shit because it's so fucking funny but still-

Jokes on him

You didnt come up with it

No in fact it was the man in the walls

Which you have explained to the brothers and now all of them live in fear of some fucking guy just living in their walls

Well all except Lucifer for some reason but I digress

One night whilst scrumbling you came across the attic and low and behold there was just some fucking guy in there

And at first you were like

Hello? Whys there a twink in the attic?

Anyways he didnt take too kindly to you saying that bullshit outloud and the two of you argued over whether or not he was a twink for a solid two hours before he just kind of went

Damn are you fucking high on someth-

Wait a minute

Yo kid I just had the best idea

Anyways you didnt quite get it but you were guaranteed that it would be hilarious

And it was

For all of two hours

And then it wasnt

Because Lucifer came down from his high

And got filled with stress again

Like honestly the man probably needs it you did him a favor /j

Anyways

Then you were no longer allowed "free roam without a babysitter"

"No mammon doesnt count"

"No satan doesnt count either"

"You know what, none of you count"

And then you were put on A BABY LEASH

YEAH THATS RIGHT

HARNESS AND ALL

BABY LEASHED RIGHT ALONGSIDE CERBUS AND HIS NORMAL DOG LEASH

AND YOU WERE DRAGGED TO SCHOOL

On the bright side...

At least you're actually a kid

So it's nowhere as embarrassing as it is for Levi to be hooked to the baby leash and dragged to RAD

You arrived and you were so polite

Such an angel to be around

Is what I would say if I were a fucking liar

You got there and were on all cours growling at the other students

You ran into Luke and he TREMBLED

HE YELPED AND LEAPT INTO SIMEONS ARMS

DO YOU KNOW THE PSYCHOLIGICAL DAMAGE YOU JUST DID ON THAT POOR ANGEL

of course you do

you little monster

You spent the entire first hour of class absolutely gnawing on Lucifer's ankle and you could tell he was really holding back from kicking you

And then you had a brilliant idea!!

TEETH BITE

TEETH SHARP

BITE WITH SHARP TEETH

AQUIRE FREEDOM

and thus your chomp chomp mission began, you began tearing at that leash, and eventually your efforts paid off

You were free!!!

MC IS A FREE HUMAN!!!

And so you ran

You ran like your heart depended on it

Luke

Sobbing

Screaming

Crying

Get away from him you tiny psychopath

You came running at him down the hallway and what was he even supposed to do???

HE LITERALLY CRAWLED UP A RANDOM DEMON IN FEAR, THEN JUMPED ONTO THE LOCKERS AND COWERED

of course, you tried climbing up to befriend him

...yeah

he didn't like that

He called Simeon sobbing in a panic while smacking you away with a broom handle

then you stole the broom handle...

THEN YOU STARTED BEATING PEOPLE WITH IT SIMEON

P L E A S E

S E N D

H E L P

Simeon

Hahaha aw

what a sweet little thing you are

you're just a baby human!

awwwe come here sweet ange- AHHHH

WHY ARE YOU BITING

NO BAD HUMAN

NO BITING

He is flailing his hand trying to get you to release your pirannah jaws

This does fucking nothing you are LATCHED ON

YOU ARE GAINING FRIENDS

FRIENDSHIP

LIL BITE

Simeon

had to use his foot

He put his foot on your forehead and just had to kick you off before climbing up with Luke in fear

You were scampering around like a fucking shark

The angels were holding each other, reading off their wills

Barbatos and Diavolo

of course they had to walk down the hallway

right when you started climbing the lockers

causing the angels to scream at the top of their lungs

Diavolo

he couldn't keep it together

LISTEN OKAY DONT GET ME WRONG

HE FEELS BAD THAT THEY ARE AFRAID

BUT ALSO

YOU ARE SO SM A L L

WHY ARE YOU SCREAMING THEY ARE TINY

SOMETIMES THEY BITE THATS NORMAL PROBABLY

ITS CALLED TEETHING

DUMBASSES /affectionate

Barbatos doesn't quite know how to break it to him that...children your age are far past teething age

Nonetheless, Barbatos dealt with Diavolo as a child, how much worse could you be?

...

......

.........

No one

Not a single soul

Will ever bring up this day

if they want to live

He doesn't even know where you got shoelaces

YOUR SHOES ARE VELCRO

MORE THAN THAT HOW DID YOU GET ON HIS SHOULDERS

WHAT FUCKING MOVIES HAVE YOU BEEN WATCHING THAT TAUGHT YOU HOW TO PROPERLY CHOKE SOMEONE OUT???

SOMEONE NEEDS TO RESTRICT YOUR FUCKING INTERNET ACCESS

YOUR HIGHNESS, PLEASE STOP FUCKING LAUGHING I AM DYING FRFR

Solomon

dying frfr

wheezing

crying on the floor

he filmed it all

no more than that

he's live streaming

Lucifer is trying to call him

Lmao blocked

He snatched you up and fucking ran

You are his little buddy now

You are taking cover deep in a place where Solomon knows Lucifer would never look for him...

...

......

Kid don't you dare comment that we're in the gym right now

LISTEN

HE IS A NERD

A BOOK NERD

A MAGIC NERD

HE DOESNT REALLY NEED TO GO TO GYM CLASS NOW STFU BEFORE HE LEAVES YOU FOR DEAD

you know how like

in jail you make toilet wine?

well he made toilet teleportation potion

Just in time the two of you crawled in the bowl and flushed, disappearing as the brothers broke in

they'll never find you now

mwahahahaha

time to watch every season of breaking bad

watch and learn kid

watch

and

learn

Previous Feral MC Post:

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putschki1969 · 3 months

Text

2024/02/19 Blog post by Wakana ふむふむの日2024を振り返ろう♪〜映画と衣装と肩の骨〜

❗This is Fan Club EXCLUSIVE content❗ ❗PERSONAL USE ONLY❗ ❗Do NOT SHARE on other sites❗ ❗Join her FAN CLUB! Check out my detailed TUTORIAL ❗

Looking Back At February 6 2024 ♪〜Movie, Dresses And Shoulder Bones〜

The other day, I went to see the movie "Golden Kamuy" with a friend 😊I received a special git at the cinema! A panel drawn by the original creator＼＼\\٩( 'ω' )و //／／ I was so happy because I didn't expect to get something like this! 😍 The girl I went with is a big fan of the original work, actually, she is such a hardcore fan that she and her husband have even gone on a proper pilgrimage to Abashiri which is a place from the manga. I also enjoyed the manga so I decided to go and watch the film with her! The visuals were so powerful and the music was so wonderful that (despite the fairly fantasy-like setting) I felt a strange sense of reality that made me cry many times... It was the first time I watched a movie at the cinema since ``The Boy and the Heron'', I had a lot of fun! 😆 (By the way, the girl who went with me was the same friend who went with me when I watched “The Boy and the Heron” for the second time♪) Being at the movie theater for the first time in a long while got me really excited, initially, I only wanted to get some oolong tea at the snack bar but then, I ended up with all of this😂 How did this happen? When I looked at the menu, I got really excited 🤣I got a large popcorn and a hot dog *laughs*

Hello, this is Wakana (0￣▽￣0)／

I couldn't finish the giant popcorn and had to take it home *laughs* I quietly stuffed my mouth with the hot dog before the film had even begun🤤 Even though I had told myself that it would be better to wait until the film was over to avoid getting tired...🥺 Such a fickle nature🥺(Thankfully the movie was so interesting that I didn't feel sleepy at any point)

Now, I would like to talk a little about my “Wakana 5th Anniversary “Prologue” ~Premium Online Live~” which was held on February 6th! Here I am together with Saku-chan who joined me on the piano 😊We also made sure to take a picture where we look a bit cool📸 With this premium online live I celebrated a milestone, the 5th anniversary of my solo debut. I wanted to start my celebrations together with everyone from my fan club! For some reason, those five years actually feel like a longer time... or rather, it feels like a lot more years have passed already. I included the entire “journey” from my solo debut up until now in the setlist!

M-01 Yureru Haru M-02 Tsubasa MC M-03 Ai no Hana M-04 Aki no Sakura (Acoustic ver.) MC M-05 Orange MC M-06 Haru wo Matsu (Kalafina) M-07 Shirushi MC M-08 Kinmokusei M-09 Flag MC M-10 magic moment MC M-11 Sono Saki e

There are songs from my 1st album "Wakana", my 2nd album "magic moment", my EP "Aki no Sakura" and my 3rd album "Sono Saki e"! I ended up cramming in as much as possible since I wanted to create a setlist that would allow me to look back on the past 5 years.😊 During my MCs I tried to express my feelings from each period, hopefully I was able to share some fresh thoughts with you.

I once again realized that the "chat" may be the best part of an online live performances! At live performances with an actual on-site audience it's not really possible to have a real conversation, but online, everyone can talk about all sorts of things. Of course, even if there are no words exchanged between us, I know that people are watching and supporting me but I always feel very relieved when people say a lot of things in the chat (*´- `) It's honestly so reassuring to know that everyone is watching and listening (^-^)

Despite all of that, my surprise lyric mishaps keep happening, whether it's been 5 years or 15 years, I will never get rid of those...😂Why? ? 😂 I could really feel everyone's surprise and kindness from the chat messages, it was a special sense of gratitude that I probably couldn't experience at a live performances with an on-site audience. Thank you again to everyone who watched and supported me! ! My 5th Anniversary celebrations have only just begun. At my upcoming band live on May 12th, I would like to have the time to reflect even more on the past five years ! Details will be posted soon! Please be patient a little while longer~･:*+.\(( °ω° ))/.:+

Lastly, I would like to post some pictures of my dress from February 6th 😆This is the same dress I wore on the cover of my 1st album "Wakana"♪ I also wore it during the encore for my ``VOICE'' tour, at that time, it was altered a bit so it would work better for a live performance 😍 I had my hair down, which is quite unusual for me ♡ The makeup artist also added some sparkling hairpins 😍

I always wonder why my shoulder bones are so prominent...🤣 I think it's a skeletal issue because I am pretty sure not everyone's shoulder looks like that, right? 😂 I don't have any particular pain or problems in this area but I always feel like there's just a lot of bone sticking out. I envy people with smoother shoulders🥺

Anyway, I'm glad I was able to fit into a dress from 5 years ago ･:*+.\(( °ω° ))/.:+ For some reason, that got me super excited! 😂😂 Easy peasy🤗 Yay!

So, that’s it for today! Until next time~ ☆( *'▽'*)/

＊＊＊Wakana＊＊＊

『Wakana 5th Anniversary Live』 Details Revealed

To commemorate the 5th Anniversary of Wakana’s solo debut, a special band live will be held for the first time in 3 years! Once again, Wakana will be joined by Satoshi Takebe to deliver a unique live performance together with other musicians. Please look forward to it!

Title: “Wakana 5th Anniversary Live (tentative)” Date: May 12, 2024 ◆1st Stage◆ Open 14:45 / Start 15:30 ◆2nd Stage◆ Open 18:15 / Start 19:00 Venue: I’M A SHOW (capacity: 398 seats) Starring: Wakana, Satoshi Takebe (Music Director/Piano), etc. 【Ticket price】 All seats reserved 8,500円 ※An additional 600円 drink fee will be charged at the venue

Advanced Ticket Lottery for BL Members

[Ticket Sales Service] SKIYAKI TICKET ※To apply, you will need to register your SC ID at "Botanical Land" and your SKIYAKI ID on the SKIYAKI TICKET site/app. Pre-registration is possible, so it is recommended to do this before the application period starts. Please note: The registration procedure includes a verfication via text message which apparently does not work for some overseas phone numbers. ※On the day of the event, present the screen displaying the QR code issued to the SKIYAKI TICKET app (no prints or screenshots permitted); Please note: To display the electronic ticket, a separate app is required

Quantity limit: Up to 2 tickets per person Payment method: Credit card/convenience store payment Ticketing method: Download the dedicated app to issue a QR code ticket Application period: February 21 to February 27 Announcement of Results: March 1~ Payment deadline: March 8

#kalafina #wakana #wakana blog #botanical land #fan club exclusive content #wakana's shoulders are the sexiest thing ever #Wakana 5th Anniversary Live #I still don't know if I should make a trip in May #T_T #I hate that the Wakana lottery ends before the Jump Out lottery #I need to know if I have tickets for HiKei first before making any plans

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iridiss · 11 months

Text

So I really like the concept of MCD Aaron & Laurance being friends. If you moved some stuff around in the timeline, like delaying Laurance’s shadow knight transformation to WELL after they meet Aaron, and match things up in time for Laurance to travel to the VP timeline, die to the Alter at the very end of season 1 a la Garroth’s sacrifice in the Irene Dimension style, and become a shadow knight either before or during the time Aaron becomes Shad’s vessel, I think it could bring about some juicy character dynamics and scenarios

(character and story analysis/ideas/headcanons below, content warning for ptsd and in-depth discussions of trauma)

I like the concept of them meeting in life, before either of them have died, when Aaron has closed himself off from the world and become hardened by the pain, fear, grief, and vengeful fury that came from watching his wife, son, and entire village die. When they meet, he’s stoic, he’s living off of vengeance alone, he’s miserable. The feared and infamous Werewolf Killer gets picked up by Aphmau, Garroth, Laurance, and Dante and brought into the Phoenix Drop Alliance, likely because he’d have much better chances at finding and killing High Priest Zane with them than just by wandering the icy wastes on his own. But the boys take him in as one of their own, they become friends, and Laurance is an especially big help to Aaron’s progress. Laurance is the comedian, he’s the playful clown, he’s the competitive spirit getting others fired up and shining their brightest, he’s the hype-man, he’s the one who cracks the jokes that keep you going in the midst of the horrific terrors of war. He’s like a dog, he brings infectious laughter wherever he goes, laughter Aaron is in dire need of. Laurance teaches Aaron the value of being light-hearted and genuine. He teaches him how to unwind, how to relax, how to have fun, how to play again. Through him, Aaron learns how to recognize when he’s safe, when he doesn’t have to fight. He can put his sword down and kick back for a while, join in on the games. He can forget about the pain for a little while. He’s the one who teaches him safety—which makes it all the more impactful when that’s the very thing that later gets torn from them.

I like the concept of Laurance being a Shadow Knight at the same time his old friend has been warped into his Shadow Lord. Aaron fights Shad and tries to heaven and back to protect his old friend from all the torture and the beatings and the brutalization designed to crush, but there’s only so much he’s capable of saving. You can have one version of their dynamic that’s much less angsty, where he does actually manage to protect Laurance from Shad’s wrath and control, preventing him from spiraling from the trauma and Shad’s influence later, and Laurance gets to keep his old, bright self through his escape and rebellion—but you can also make some delectable angst from the two of them, and I think I like that concept a little better ;>

I like to imagine that though there is a magical aspect to the Shadow Lord’s control over his knights, and he is able to possess and “puppeteer” them and send them into a blindly violent state that can be signaled by the Knight’s strong emotions, most of what makes a Shadow Knight a Shadow Knight is purely psychological. Every one of them is a person that went through a literal and emotional hell so viscerally traumatizing that they’re just…broken. They have to follow his every order, they can’t speak for themselves, they can’t do or think anything else, because God only knows what would happen to them if they did, and that gets programmed into their bones so deeply that the terrified little animal in their brains isn’t capable of even thinking of anything else—because he’s in their thoughts too. He’s in their minds, he can read their thoughts, he knows how they’re feeling, he’s in their bodies, he’s in their veins and their guts and their bones, like a terrible leech. And what thing is more horrific than losing your own autonomy and self-agency, what thing is more traumatic than having someone else, a writhing parasite of an untouchable, unstoppable man, taking your body as his property and using you, breaking you, controlling you, making you do everything you never wanted to do, like a million cockroaches inside your innards, that you can never, ever, ever get rid of, no matter how much you fight—until it’s just not worth fighting anymore. What’s the point? He’ll always be there. He’ll always find you. And that’s what happens to every Shadow Knight, that’s the fear and trauma in each that drives them to do everything they do. Laurance, Gene, Zenix, Sasha, Vylad, Zane (especially Zane since he happened to piss off Aaron too), they all have it. It’s horrifying.

But when Shad is defeated and his soul moves on to become the Judgement we see in When Angels Fall, all of his prior magical control over his Knights is lost. Laurance and Aaron are freed, all their enemies are gone, they get their happy ending, and the war is finally won. But the two are still left with the grievous scars, physical and psychological, and the question of “What the hell are we supposed to do now?” They can finally be normal now, if “normal” was ever salvageable.

Aaron remembers his old friend. He still held on fiercely to everything he learned when he was with Aphmau and the boys, he held on to his gentleness, to his care, his heart, his yearning for the joy of times long past. He feels terrible for everything Laurance went through under The Shadow Lord’s command, and he wants his friend back, he wants to make it up to him and fix it somehow, even if it may be impossible to ever fix something like that, he still cares enough to try.

Laurance remembers too. To the very end, he held onto his heart and everyone in it with a shaking hand. He also understands pretty well what it’s like to be forced to hurt the people you love and do terrible things against your consent, he knows what it’s like to have someone horrible control you. So he holds an empathy for his old friend, he doesn’t blame him for any of his hurt. He knows it was all Shad, he knows logically that Aaron would never hurt him, he knows that Shad is dead and the threat is gone. But that kind of fear and pain doesn’t go away very easily, and certainly not by the scorn of “reason and logic.” A part of him has been killed, and it’s going to take a very long time to get it back, if he ever does.

He still cares for Aaron, he certainly doesn’t want to fight him or hurt him, and there’s a significant part of him that wants to keep him close. But there’s also a lot of him that’s still pretty fucked up, that still sees his Lord when he looks at Aaron. And that brings up…a lot of things. Self-destructive things, violently defiant things, furious things, crying things, hopeless things, hopeful things, comfort things.

Aaron tries his best to be gentle and reassuring and comforting, he tries his best not to spook him, but they have good days and bad days anyway. It’s all very messy, very angsty, very sopping-drenched in pain, and very much a struggle. They’re working towards getting through it.

I like that concept.

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