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gunmetal-ring · 2 years

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I'm so sad you left Caryl fandom. You've got to do you and self-care is important, and you've been on your way out the door for a while now, so it's hardly a surprise. Still, the loss of your voice and presence in our fandom leaves an empty space.

You were one of very few people whose fics struck the right note between the heaviness and the playfulness that encompass Caryl, while still keeping them in character, so that will be missed too.

I wish you happiness, in life and your new fandom.

Aww anon 😥 you are so sweet and kind and your words uplift my spirit wow. This is one of the nicest compliments ive ever gotten

Granted i did mean all of that when i said it - i knew i was being dramatic lol but it definitely still hurts too much. Also makes me too angry. So its still how i feel now.

But...

BUT...

BUT....!!!!!!

Putting it under a read more bc holy fuck its SUCH a long fucking unnecessary response lmao sorry in advance

If - IF - the rumors are true, that caryl will be in daryl does paris, TOGETHER, with ACTUAL SCENES TOGETHER, not this whole a story/b story, trying-to-find-each-other-and-making-amis-along-the-way bullshit (amis is french for friends bc i think im funny) that lasts until the last scene of the last episode of the last season that twd loves to do...

IF we see caryl ON SCREEN, TOGETHER, doing whatever THEYRE doing, TOGETHER, on THEIR spinoff, AND they are UNAMBIGUOUSLY CANON - for those of you at amc fervently reading my blog (lol) that means a kiss on the lips with romantic intent, i.e. FRENCHING (how appropriate) and confessions of being IN LOVE WITH EACH OTHER FOR YEARS AND WISHING THEY DIDNT WASTE SO MUCH TIME WHEN THEY COULD HAVE BEEN HAPPY TOGETHER, and then FOLLOWED WITH AN UNAMBIGUOUS SEX SCENE WITH EACH OTHER, bc if we can have french zombie strippers we can have a fucking sex scene...

If we get that - if we get caryl together, both in physical proximity and romantically - then i might return. If we get proof (which, apparently, can no longer be a greenlit show or pilot script or location scouting or contracts or YEARS of press or fucking talking about it IN THE MAIN SHOW) - proof such as melissa and norman posting pictures of themselves on set, bts photos released by amc, interviews with melissa and norman talking about theyre filming the spinoff and theyre having fun and how its nice to be filming together again after having collectively 1 hour of screentime together in 24 episodes, hype from amc both in print and on sm about the spinoff, promo art with them together, officially naming the spinoff as something to do with CARYL, not just daryl dixon, a table read of the pilot script (where caryl is actually, yknow, holding a conversation, not just carol talking to some french dude and daryl talking to fleur delacour), positive statements straight from mels mouth/her agents (rather than jdm tweeting angrily at 2am and norman parroting the tweet for six months that deliberately and directly contradicts mel's statement along with amc's statement), sneak peeks of CARYL TOGETHER on THEIR spinoff, things that are unambiguously proof that a) mel is back on HER show, b) carol actually has screentime, c) caryl actually has screentime, d) that theyre actually filming with the intent of releasing the show, e) that its not just daryl does paris with a carol cameo at the last scene of the last episode...

IF we get this kind of proof... not only will i resubscribe to amc+ like amc so desperately needs, but i will watch and rewatch until les vaches (french for "the cows" lol) come home.

And then you know what will happen? The caryl fandom, as always, will do the heavy lifting for amc. They will create gifs, fanart, praise the show on sm, spread the word, buy tickets to conventions, buy merchandise FROM AMC, PAY FOR AMC+, tune in to the talking dead (if thats even going to happen? I hope chris hardwick is far far away ugh), write fanfic, create fanvids, post and repost and repost this content all over sm, which will entice carylers who left the fandom due to constant ship trolling and baiting and refusal of amc to do what theyve been implying theyll do for like 8 years - including carylers who left the fandom fucking YEARS ago, as well as carylers like myself who have given the fuck up due to s11 and the spinoff fuckery - and all of this will hype up the spinoff for the general audience too. Even if GA viewers arent specifically carylers, carol is a fan favorite. Carol and daryl is a fan favorite dynamic. People want to see them together.

Amc is finally realizing that they have nailed the coffin shut with this bullshit and thats why theyre scrambling to dangle the possibility of melissa/carol in every single press release and interview they can. They are aware now of the massive fuckup that is daryl does paris. Far too late to make amends, but if they pull this off, they can save the sinking ship (lol) that is amc. Theyre losing money left and right and laying off staff bc they cant keep their fucking heads on straight, and they are well aware its bc the money they were banking on - daryl does paris - is a complete and utter shitshow and will ultimately cost them far more money than it will bring in.

The only way to salvage this is to bring back caryl. Thats it. Bring them back in the 1st episode - together - and in every single episode following that - TOGETHER. No separation, not ambiguous will they wont they, no ship baiting, no cameos.

Actually the exception to the cameo can be the last scene of the 1st episode. Ill allow it.

Wow i went off on a tangent lol. But the point remains: if they do the CARYL SPINOFF right, they will get me back in the fandom as well as everyone else who bailed.

So who knows? Maybe we have a chance. I know @weaintashescltv has been loud and proud on Twitter about what we need to see. Maybe ill even join them lol. Even tho Twitter is an absolute hellscape full of bottom feeding goblins lol

All in all... maybe ill be back.

As for the new fandom its probably a hyperfixation lol considering the main ship i have is 2 dead teenagers that would make literally no sense to ever bring back to life - altho i have to say its refreshing that both of the actors (and even other tertiary actors on the show whose characters interacted w/ had a dynamic involved in the ship!!!) have so much respect for the ship and the fans and the shippers and have spoken at length abt how they also absolutely intended for the ship to be canonically romantic. A couple ships on that show do that, actually - no trolling or baiting or inciting fandom wars or whatever.

Theres something to be said about an obsession w a literally dead ship lmao. Esp when the rest of the show is like GENUINELY good and interesting (like how s1-s5, and then s9-s10 of twd was) and not just the shop.

Goddammit another tanget. This is why all my fics are like 30,000 words longer than i intend them to be. Sorry for the word vomit lmao. But thanks again for popping in anon ilu and wish you happiness and i hope you will continue to find love and fulfillment in one of the greatest ships in television history (and in case its unclear, im talking about caryl)

💗💗💗

#op #caryl #anon #ask

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charrfie · 1 year

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Oh I meant the ones in your discomforts!!! Sorry I should’ve specified. I just thought it may come off as intrusive / rude, I’m glad it didn’t bc it wasn’t supposed to

Thank you for specifying!! <3 I can answer, but with some I may not be able to fully go into detail for personal reasons. Since you in your first ask you specified fandoms, thats all I'll be covering!

Without getting into the details, ow*ri no ser*ph and m*stic m*ssanger (censoring not bc the name itself is a trigger but bc I don't want my blog showing up under ANY searches with this) are things my abuser really loved so I can't really bear the thought of them or see pictures from them :^/ not that there's anything wrong with either series (I don't... think? I was never too interested in finding out ANYTHING about them really) but I prefer people to not interact who enjoy them for that reason. Just. For distance's sake (distance between me and the source material that is)

Alien 9 emulators is a different story though! As you may know, I'm a HUGE fan of alien 9???? Like?? Duh??? I feel like it's all I use tumblr for sometimes, just for alien 9 content. That being said alien 9 emulators Fucking Sucks. Basically any alien 9 content that isnt the original 3 volumes/the anime sucks (like alien 9 next, etc). I wrote nearly a whole essay about it one time trying to explain my viewpoints on it so it's hard to simplify my reasons but I'll try (tw csa but I'll do my best to skim over it). Basically: I feel like it's undeniable that a large part of alien 9's story is about children becoming victims of whatever kind of abuse the adults in the series perpetuate. This *includes* csa. That is an INCREDIBLY prominent aspect in the story, and while it is most obvious in kasumi's arcs, it's present in every arc, every character. Granted, it is ALWAYS through metaphor. Leaving you to put the pieces together, as most of the series does even with other topics. So, to quote my essay: "Emulators takes all of those intricately and gently crafted metaphorical plot points and turns them on their heads." The victims break from the healing they were doing, continue the cycle to become abusers themselves, and (though a petty gripe compared to the rest) it retcons SO many things to make way for these twisted fucking metaphors and careless storytelling??? It doesn't even fucking BOTHER to provide some sorry excuse as to WHY it is doing this. THAT is why it's on that list in my carrd

Tldr: alien 9 emulators is horribly disrespectful (and arguably actively harmful) to the very people it originally wished to uplift

#long post #medium long but still #i have so fucking much i could say about emulators it makes me so angry you have no idea #genuinely furious #granted emulators does tell some stories that are important #but they are told in a disgustingly wrong context #with the things i know about the author now though..... it makes a little more sense why the storys course changed so swiftly /neg #lmk if this answered your question though anon!! i hope it helped #tw csa mention #should also specify that yeah. i know people interpret alien 9s story to mean something TOTALLY different than what i do #that comes with the territory (horribly confusing metaphors and symbolism in an already alien world)#but i am NOT willing to budge on my interpretation at fucking all sorry #laika answers

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lilastromama · 3 years

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Rating the Signs as big 3 Placements

(Sagittarius, Pisces, Leo, Virgo)

Sagittarius:

sun: whoopsie, i dont know. Most of them are really great to have conversations about mysterious and weird topics, like aliens and the universe as a whole, i enjoy that so lets put the positive stuff first. What im not enjoying on the other hand, is them being very competitive, even with their closest people. Also when theyre mad, they are gonna talk about u behind ur back and think of very evil and scary ways to get revenge, 6/10 tho

moon: i really do like sag moons. I think i mentioned this in one of my posts already, but: Theyre SO uplifting, supporting and caring! I really like how they always find a way to catch you when ure falling. Maybe theyre extremely stubborn and dont like being wrong in whatever aspects, but yeah, lets put that aside! giving them a good 8/10

rising: Sag risings are really to die for, not trying to be dramatic. Theyre extremely creative, also deep. My first take on sag risings is always "mhm, i dont think it would work out" and then boom, they show you their real persona and whats behind this mask. Really loveable creatures, they just seem a bit off. giving them 8/10

Pisces

sun: I dont like them. Listen here, im not trying to be a bitch and im not the person to feed into stereotypes, but with pisces suns its just TRUTH. they will try to hide their insecurities by acting confident, instead of actually trying to get better, what makes them come off as self centered and arrogant, even tho theyre not. Also most of the time, sorry not sorry, - theyre AWARE of the fact that theyre toxic but wont do shit about it because just sitting and being miserable sounds easier than actually digging into the dark parts of oneself. 3/10

moon: pisces moons are actually very sad to watch. Theyre more on the introvert side than the extrovert, u'd think theyre very quiet and private people. What most dont know about them tho, is that they live inside their heads and if u would take a look inside, u'd be surprised. Their head and mind is their own little world, their own little universe. Its chaotic, always moving. There is so much going on inside of them and if u get to know them, u will find out how deep and interesting they really are. Dear pisces moons, let us be part of your inner world and your beauty, dont hide. 8/10

rising: ohhhh HELL YES. Idk about you people, but to me, they have such a mystical, interesting look to them. Lagoona blue from monster high vibes and i said what i said. Very creative, also intuitive, maybe interested in the occult and so called "taboo" topics. Maybe theyre even activists, trying to help out and raise awareness where they can. Just as with pisces moons: they come off as private people, but probably would have an more interesting life story than most of us. 9/10

Leo

sun: Its a yes from me, but somehow a no, too. Leo women? GIVE IT TO ME! Leo men? well, only if evolved. What i like about leo suns is their confidence and the way they present themselves. U'd notice a leo sun everywhere they go, believe me there. If unevolved, they can be one hell to deal with, i gotta admit that (but also hella fun) - If evolved tho, theyre SUCH angels and actually very aware of themselves and their actions. Theyre the ones to push you to be the best version of yourself, i vibe with it. 9/10

moon: Its actually a yes too! Theyre so complex, hard to understand - but only if ure not open minded! To vibe with them, u have to be evolved - sorry not sorry. If not, theyre going to push you till you are. And that, not really in comfortable ways for you. They truly dont mean no harm and trying to help out, but its really not for all people, especially if ure sensitive. Keep an eye out i guess and let them do their job, u will thank them sooner or later. 9/10

rising: yeah, idk. To me, theyre fake leos and im not even sorry ☠️ They come off as leos, but not really in the same font. Instead, to me, theyre way worse! Its like those cheap nutella-copy products ur mom wants u to buy. To me they have more of the traits that virgo suns have. Perfectionists, egocentric, analytical but not in a good way - and always searching for something they can talk and gossip about. They constantly break down ur life instead of worrying about themselves and call it "trying to help" - (No darling, u just like putting ur 2 cents in that no one asked for) 5/10

Virgo

sun: once again a no, im sorry at this point :( Even tho i have to say, YES they seem very kind, caring, even supporting and accepting, but if u look closer, ure finding nothing of it all. They are always up everyones ass, as i mentioned in one of my posts aswell. Just like pisces suns, theyre making themselves something they arent. I actually believe they could be such great friends, they just have to better themselves and watch how theyre handling their own emotions. Both of them project their insecurities onto others and make it their problem to handle. Please, virgo and pisces at this point: Get ur hands dirty, do shadow work and you both are great to go! 4/10

moon: oh well, we're talking about me here (this doesnt better anything to be honest) - I feel like virgo moons are very, very serious when it comes to their own feelings and mind, theyre warding it from anything or anyone. Thats where i think they have something from scorpios: They want to know everything about you, but you cant know anything about them and if so, you probably get rejected sooner or later because it would be too dangerous to get hurt. Very analytical, skeptical and calculating people. We really need that emotional safety to actually come out of our comfort zone but IF we do, u'll get to know a new person! still complex tho- 8/10

rising: I dont wanna start a new stereotype but: Am i the only one that kind of noticed how virgo risings look like those pinterest-indie-kids? Its either that or the grunge kids u always see on instagram as an outfit inspo. Im actually invested! They really possess that motherly/caring vibe ure instantly familiar with and feel comfortable around, im a definitely a fan! 9/10

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atilla-da-honey · 4 years

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A Comprehensive review of the Gods I have met in my travels by Inquisitor Lavellan

Mythal: Seems to spend wayyy to much time and energy trying to be mysterious. (Kinda stepping on Dirthaman's territory imo) Might actully explode if she has to give a straight answer. Deffintly could have used her considerable powers to help elves but instead she choose to merge with an angry shem noble woman and then power up Fen'Harel so he can kill us all. For the Goddess of motherhood she seems to be straight up bad at parenting. Also I've heard some shady stories about how she choose to punish Templars that make me think she's not so great at the "justice" part of her portfolio either. (Do you know how hard it is to get a Dalish elf to sympathise with a Templar??????? Because Mythal found a way.) Also she kept slaves which is not very good from a "Protector of The People" angle, which again, is on her divine resume.

(Is she actully good at ***anything*** shes susposed to be good at????)

She did lend me a dragon that one time which I guess was nice of her but lets be real that was kinda a bare minimum effort considering the world was ending and stuff. 4/10

Fen'Harel: He armed my mortal enemy, cursed me with his magic and broke my heart, which I thought was very rude. He's also kind of judgey about the Dalish which is a bit rich. We might be a bunch of dumbasses but whos fault was that again???? Also was it *my people* who we're going around slaving each other? No??? That was your precious ancients???? Wow I guess my free kinsmen and I just cannot compare to those moraly superior ancient slavers huh?

Fuck you Solas.

0/10,Too many eyes, would not reccomend.

(On a seperate note if were specifically talking about his ass thats a straight up 10/10.)

(Yes he got points for trying to end slavery but I deducted them again for his botched execution and for his current, even shittier plan to end the world. Also for dumping me in a swamp what, and I cannot express this enough, THE FUCK.)

Hakkon Wintersbreath: You know what? I have no beef with Hakkon. Apparantly it was bound into the body of a High Dragon. I'm not certian either Hakkon or the dragon consented to any of that. (Hakkon if you read this hit me up, theres an amulet you might like) Even so, Hakkon actully gets extra points for being a High Dragon because one, dragons are fuckin cool and two, dragons are inherantly feminist. 10/10

Corypheus: BITCH. -100/10

Urthmiel: Deffintly looses points for being one of the old Tevinter gods and for their role in unleashing the blight upon the world. Not sexy or cool. That said when I met them they were a 10 year old boy who was very polite. This is espically impressive because I have met both the boys parents and his grandmother (Mythal) and his sweet disposition might legit count as some kind of miricle. 7/10 (Points also dedicated for being human)

Andraste: Honestly I wasnt gonna add her bc she's a demi-god or a prophet or somerhing not a God, but I figure shes close enough.

Personally, if some incredibly sexy and cool mortal was uplifted as my "herald" I'd make time to introduce myself. Maybe send some guiding visions or somerhing. Mythal gave me a dragon, where is my dragon Andraste?????

I mean I guess I'll give her props for freeing slaves from Tevinter and for being cool about elves. But her followers are all a bunch of dicks.

Oh I guess I shouldn't generalise, thats rude. I'll rephrase, "Every Andrastian I've ever met who wasnt Cassandra Allegra Portia Calogera Filomena Pentaghast has been a huge dick and tbh even she was on thin fucking ice in the early days." 3/10 lazy goddess who's coasting on one thousand year old good deed.

#Solas #Lavellan #Dragon Age #Dragon Age Spoilers #trespasser spoilers #tresspasser #Hakkon Wintersbreath #Hakkon #Urthmiel #flemeth #mythal #corypheus #Fen'Harel #Inquisitor Lavellan

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la5t-res0rt · 4 years

Text

this was written several weeks ago in response to asks i was receiving i am posting it now it is very long the longest i have ever made and it is not very well edited but here it is in this final essay i talk about how shitty rae is about black people in her writing as well as just me talking about how her writing sucks in general lets begin

hello everyone

as you may know i have received a lot of anons in the last week or so about issues of racism in the beetlejuice community both just generally speaking and also within specific spaces

i was very frustrated to not be getting the answers i wanted because i typically do not talk about what i do not see but in an effort to be better about discourse i went looking through discourse from before my time in the fandom and i also received some receipts and information from my followers and from some friends

keep in mind that the voices and thoughts of bipoc are not only incredibly important at all times but in this circumstance it is important that if a bipoc has something to add you listen and learn and be better

i admit that when this happened i wasnt aware of the extent of what occurred and im angry at myself for not doing more at that time and i want to work harder to make sure something like this doesnt go unnoticed again

im a hesitant to talk about months old discourse because i have been criticized for bringing up quote old new unquote but this is very important and i am willing to face whatever comes from to me

lets talk about this

content from our local racist idiot that may be months old but its important

putting my thoughts under a cut to spare the dash but before i begin obviously this is awful

lets fucking unpack this folks

right out the gate op states that she supports artistic freedom but then within a couple words she goes against that statement

being entirely canon compliant isnt artistic freedom and even so if this person has so much respect for canon they wouldnt be out here erasing lydias obvious disgust for beetlejuice in the movie or ignoring lydias age for the sake of shipping that shit isnt canon either

also we love the quick jab at the musical there hilarious we love it dont we because god forbid a licensed and successful branch on a media have any standing in this conversation but whatever

now lets scroll down and talk about the term racebending

the term racebending was coined around 2009 in response to the avatar the last airbender movie a film in which the east asian races of the characters were erased by casting white actors in the three leading roles of aang sokka and katara

whenever the term racebending is used in a negative light it is almost always a case of whitewashing like casting scarlett johansen in ghost in the shell or the casting of white actors of the prince of persia sands of time instead of iranian ones

this kind of racebending erases minorities from beeing seen in media and is wrong

all that being said however racebending has also been noted to have very positive after effects like the 1997 adaptation of cinderella or casting samuel jackson as nick fury in the marvel movies nick fury was originally a white guy can you even imagine

i read this piece from an academic that said quote writers can change the race and cultural specificity of central characters or pull a secondary character of color from the margins transforming them into the central protagonist unquote

racebending like the kind that rae is so heated about is the kind of creative freedom that leads to more representation of bipoc in media which will never be a bad thing ever no matter how pissy you get about it

designing a version of a character as a poc isnt serving to make them necessarily better it serves to give new perspective and perhaps the opportunity to connect even more deeply with a character it doesnt marginalize or erase white people it can uplift poc and if you think uplifting poc is wrong because it tears down white people or whatever youre a fucking moron and you need to get out of your podunk white folk town and see the real world

the numbers of times a bipoc particularly a bipoc that is also lgbt+ has been represented in media are dwarfed by what i as a white dude have seen myself represented in media is and that isnt okay that isnt equality and its something that should change not only in mainstream media but in fandom spaces as well

lets move down a bit further to the part about bullying straight people which is hilarious and lets also talk about the term fetishistic as well lets start with that

this person literally writes explicit pornography of a minor and an adult are we really going to let someone like that dictate what is and what isnt fetishistic

similarly to doing a positive racebend situation people may project lgbt+ headcanons on a character because its part of who they are and it helps them feel closer to the character and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that

depicting lgbt+ subject matter on existing characters isnt an inherently fetishistic action generally things only really become fetishistic when the media is being crafted and hyped by people who are outside of lgbt+ community for example how young teens used to flip a tit about yaoi or how chasers fetishize trans people

but drawing a character with top surgery scars or headcanoning them as trans is harmless and its just another way to interpret a character literally anone could be trans unless if their character bio says theyre cis and most of them dont go that deep so it really is open to interpretation and on the whole most creators encourage this sort of exploration because it is a good thing to get healthy representation out in the world

as for it being used to bully straights thats just funny i dont have anything else on that like if youre straight and you feel threatened and bullied because of someone headcanoning someone as anything that isnt cishet youre a fucking idiot and a weak baby idiot at that like the real world must fucking suck for you because lgbt+ people are everywhere and statistically a big chunk of your favorite characters arent cishet sorry be mad about it

lets roll down a bit further about the big meat of the issue which was when several artists were drawing interpretations of lydia as a black girl which i loved but clearly this person didnt love it because they have a very narrow and very racist and problematic view of what it means to be a black person

and before i move forward i must reiderate that i am a white person and you should listen to the thoughts of poc people like @fright-of-their-lives or @gender-chaotic it is not my place to explain what the black experience is like and it certainly isnt this persons either

implying that the story of a black person isnt worth telling unless if the character faces struggles like racism and prejudice is downright moronic

why use the word kissable to describe a black persons lips now thats what i call fetishistic and its to another extreme if youre talking about a black version of lydia on top of that

the author of this post says herself that shes white so clearly shes the person whos an authority on the black experience and what it means to be a black person right am i reading that right or am i having a fucking conniption

how about allowing black characters to exist without having to struggle why cant a black version of lydia just be a goth teenager with a ghost problem who likes photography and is also black like she doesnt have to move to a hick town and get abused by racist folks she doesnt have to go through any more shit than she already goes through and if you honestly think thats the only way to tell a black persons story you need to get your brain cleaned

you know nothing about the complexities about being a black person and i dont either but you know wh odo black people who are doing black versions of canon characters they fucking know

lets squiggle down just a bit further

so the writer has issues with giving characters traits like a broad nose or larger lips if theyre a woman but if theyre a man suddenly its totally okay to go all ryan murphy ahs coven papa legba appropriation when approaching character design like are you fucking stupid do you hear yourself is that really how you see black men like what the fuck is wrong with you

none of the shit youre spewing takes bravery it takes ignorance and supreme levels of stupidity

do you really think you with your fic where a black lgbt+ woman is tortured and abused where you use the n word with a hard r to refer to her like that shits not okay its fucking depraved and yeah we know you love being shitty but like christ on a bike thats so much

can we also talk about this

what the fuck is this fetishistic bull roar garbage calling this black character beyonce dressing her up in quote fuck me heels unquote are you are you seriously gonna write this and say its a shining example of how to write a black character youre basically saying ope here she is shes a sex icon haha im so progressive and i clealry understand the black experience hahahaha fuck you oh my god

on top of that theres a point where this character is only referred to as curly hair or the fact that the n word is used in the fic with the hard r like thats hands down not okay for you to use especially not in a manner like this jesus christ

oop heres a little more a sampling for you of the hell i am enduring in reading this drivel

oh boy lets put a leash on the angry black woman character lets put her in a leash and have the man imply hes a master like are you kidding me are you for real and what the fuck is with calling her shit like j lo and beyonce do you actually think thats clever at all are you just thinking of any poc that comes into your head for this

also lydia fucking tells this girl that she shouldnt have lost her temper like she got fucking leashed im so tired why is this writing so problematic and also so bad

hold up before i lose my head lets look at some of her own comments on the matter of this character and what happens to her

hi hello youre just casually tossing the word lynch out there in the wide open world as if thats not a problem that is still real like are you fucking unhinged there have been multiple cases of this exact thing happening in our firepit of a country in the last five months alone like how can you still have shit like this up for people to read how can you be proud of work like this in this climate

and also what the fuck is that last bit

what the actual fuck

i dont speak for black people as a white person but you do!? im sorry i had to get my punctuation out for that because wow thats fucking asinine just because one black person read your fic and didnt find the torture and abuse of your one black character abhorrant doesnt mean that the vast majority of people not only in the fandom but in the human population with decency are going to think its okay because its not

i started this post hoping to be level headed and professional but jesus fucking christ this woman is something else white nationalism is alive and well folks and its name is rae

if you defend this woman you defend some truly abhorrant raecism

editors notes

in order to get some perspective on these issues more fully some of the writing by the author was examined and on the whole it was pretty unreadable but i want to just call back to the very beginning of this essay where the person in question talked about holding canon in high regard but then in their writing they just go around giving people magic and shit and ignoring the end of the movie entirely like are you canon compliant or nah

the writing doesnt even read like beetlejuice fanfic it reads as self indulgent fiction you could easily change the names and its just a bad fanfic from 2007

also can we talk about writing the lesbian character as an angry man hater like its 2020 dude and als olets touch on that girl on girl pandering while beetlejuice is just there like here we go fetishizing again wee

i cant find a way to work this into this already massive post but

im going to throw up

okay so thats a lot we have covered a lot today and im sure my ask box will regret it but this definitely should have been more picked apart when it happened

please feel free to add more to this i would love more perspectives than just my own.

#long post #racism #raecism #im so tired #thanks for reading

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cecilbaldwin-fan · 3 years

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“The First Ten Years”: my thoughts

Updated: this is the review I wrote at Goodreads. Amazon won’t let me write a review, because apparently my account isn’t verified or some shit.

I have followed Meg and Joseph's artistic careers for a while, both through Welcome to Night Vale and the New York Neo-Futurists, so I was very excited to read this book, and I was not disappointed. It was moving, it was funny, and it offered quite a few insights into Meg and Joseph’s personalities and their life together. Both are very intelligent and insightful, and obviously very much in love with each other.

The book has a lot to say about change and growing up, adapting to new things together, falling in love with each other all over again as you find yourselves in a new place. There are fights and difficulties, but the story is generally very joyful and uplifting. Fights are not described in too much detail, and happy moments are given more weight. I found it interesting that they often don’t mention the same exact events. A small moment that meant a lot for Joseph might not be in Meg’s story at all, and vice versa. This makes you think about memory, how our emotions shape the things we remember.

This is Joseph’s first nonfiction book, and while I found his writing moving and vulnerable, I would say Meg is the stronger writer of this format. Her bits were raw, insightful, and often laugh-out-loud funny. That said, Joseph’s recollections of his father’s death are perhaps the most moving part of the book.

I felt a strong connection with Meg. Her painful relationship with her body was particularly relatable to me. She discusses her eating disorder, substance abuse issues, and insecurities about her body very openly. I also have an eating disorder and recognize that ongoing anxiety, as well as the negativity and hatred people throw at fat women. Joseph's kindness and acceptance of her body was something that made me happy; other guys could learn from that. But there’s something more to that feeling of connection with Meg, maybe just being a woman in this world. I recognized the fears when Trump won the election, for instance. When Meg said that living in a woman's body puts you at risk, I felt that deeply. I would be curious to know if a guy would feel more of a connection with Joseph instead.

There were a few parts I didn’t find it so relatable. For instance, I haven’t traveled much and have never been to the US. They talk a lot about very specific New York and New Jersey things, and I simply don’t have the frame of reference for those bits. Since I haven't gotten married, some of those thoughts felt more distant for me as well.

I found the earlier years were more interesting than the later ones, for some reason. Possibly because their relationship became more stable and they settled into a routine. However, Meg’s letter to their possible future child was a highlight. She is now expecting said child - talk about impeccable timing!

I was surprised by how little Night Vale stuff there was. I thought it would be this huge thing in their lives, but they talk mostly about the practical side of things, like the strain of constant touring. I started to question whether Night Vale was a bigger thing for me and other fans than it was for them. Of course, much of the Night Vale stuff was between Joseph and Jeffrey and Cecil, not between Joseph and Meg. That might be why it’s slightly on the backburner. Meg also writes about her work with the Neo-Futurists, which I personally found very interesting. You don’t need to be in the theatre scene to enjoy these bits, but it probably helps if you're into art in general.

The main thing that I felt was missing were photos. It would have been nice to see Meg in the outfits she describes, and perhaps some early selfies from before the Night Vale tours. Joseph describes a specific photo in detail, and it feels a bit odd to not actually see it.

All in all, I’m happy they wrote this book and that I got to read it. Maybe there will be another book in the next 8 years. Night Vale fans will obviously get a lot out of this story, but I would imagine it’s relatable for anyone who’s been in a long relationship, especially artists.

More personal thoughts under the cut.

I realized I have a lot in common with Joseph. I’m anxious and messy, I love fiction, I get nervous and stressed about everything. In other things, I’m not like him: I’m not good at making big changes, I don’t have have great confidence in my work. Meg says the world would be a better place if all artists had Joseph’s confidence.

Despite the similarities with Joseph, I felt more connected with Meg. We definitely don’t have as much in common. She’s neat and organized and wants to be in control. I’m messy and unorganized, and I like when other people are in control. Meg likes running and working out, I don’t. Meg loves to cook, I just love to eat. We do share a fear of change and a tortured body image.

Meg says she’s been a size 6 and a size 26; I’ve been ca. size 20 for the last ten years, and never really lost weight. I’d like to say I’ve had it harder, with my apple shaped body and not-so-pretty face, but reading the book, I don’t know. I think she’s so beautiful, and she really doesn’t talk about herself that way.

I’m used to reading a story that goes from fat and sad and weak to slim and confident and strong, and I honestly hate that story and was worried I would have to read it in this book

The book could easily have been very triggering if she had chosen to do that. Instead, I found an intensely relatable writer who wrote about her body at various sizes with that trademark self-deprecating wit. Sometimes she mentions insecurities regarding her body, other times she says nothing at all about it. There’s no “that year I was xxx pounds and then I went down to xxx pounds and here’s how I lost the weight and I feel great now” blabla.

I saw her use phrases like “fatphobic” and “thin privilege”, and referring to herself as “fat”. To me, these are signs of allyship. She’s obviously done some reading into the topic and given it a lot of thought. Her painful relationship with her body is something most women can relate to. Joseph is shown to be a caring and compassionate husband who has no issue with her changing body. (Her blonde phase, however...)

They mention they think of Helsinki as an “exhausted city”, because they were exhausted there. But I can say as a Finn that Helsinki really is exhausting. Nice to visit for a day, but wouldn’t want to live there. I was glad that there were a few mentions of Helsinki. Finland is never this exotic location that stands out, for anyone. Certainly not for people who have visited Australia and Hawaii.

Thats about all I have to say today. Maybe I’ll add some thoughts later when I re-read the book. I just really wanted to post this today .

#meg bashwiner #joseph fink #the first ten years #MEGSEPH #i love love love this book #personal stuff #very long post

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iridescentides · 4 years

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spontaneity can be fun! and it's so sweet that you're starting traditions with your gf ❤️💚 this is probably warranting another Read More (which i love by the way and you shouldn't feel ashamed of) but i know how much lela from teen beach movie means to you and i wanted to hear why? 😊 - 🎅🎁��

hi again friend! sorry for responding so late but youre right this will be another read more! thanks for asking such good questions!

i think at the heart of it, lela is my favorite for the same reasons that i like a lot of my favorite characters: honesty, genuineness, and resilience. having the bravery to love openly, to explore, and to believe in yourself enough to keep going, even when other people may not support you.

lela is unwaveringly kind, caring, and loving. in the first movie, we watch her dance around blissfully, spread compliments and positivity like confetti, and welcome mack and brady into her world like long lost friends. she is unafraid to show care and compassion, and she loves like its the most natural thing in the world for her to do. we watch her confront a fear and begin to learn how to prioritize herself, but shes a little hesitant. she is ready to grow, but she needs a little help. in the second movie we get to see her take agency over her own life and her own narrative, putting herself and her interests first, without sacrificing the loving aspect of her character. she continues to support and uplift others as shes learning to uplift herself. she wears her enthusiasm proudly, and she grabs every opportunity she can.

the thing that sets lela apart from every other character for me is the way that she truly exemplifies confidence. to me, confidence is the most important thing in the world, the most crucial trait for a person to have, and lela came to me at a particularly impactful and influential time in my relationship with myself.

i was 16 when teen beach 2 came out. i hadnt really cared much about the first teen beach movie; i liked it, but i wasnt obsessed. when the second movie came out, i was right in the middle of a very transformative 2 years of my life, where i had decided that i was going to learn to love myself at all costs. i made conscious efforts to step outside of my comfort zone, i read a ton of self-help articles, i wrote myself affirmations, and i just generally reworked my entire brain to become a more confident person. i started to lean more into media, music, and friendships that made me feel good, and to unapologetically enjoy things. i was also learning a lot of new things about feminism and about society as a whole. and for the person i was at the time (and the person i wanted to become), lela came at the exact right moment.

i understand that some people may see lela as an embodiment of surface-level, hashtag girl power disney channel feminism (esp with the “girls can do anything boys can do” line in the first movie). i know that she may seem cheesy and maybe unrealistic to some people. i get that. but as a role model for some of the important changes i was trying to put into place in my own life at the time, she was absolutely perfect.

society teaches women specifically not to like themselves. to never be “too much.” to never be too smart, too loud, or too into themselves. thats misogyny 101. we learn to conflate confidence with arrogance, and to worry that if we’re nice to ourselves, if we think well about ourselves, then it MUST be arrogance at that point, which is a bad trait to have. we learn that if we express ourselves, embrace our ideas, and push to be heard, that thats selfishness, and we’re taking from other people when we take up space. this is simply untrue; a confident person coexists on an equal plane with others, giving themselves the same time, attention, and care that they would give to other people. i was working to internalize this idea at 16 when lela became the perfect example. in growing her confidence and her power in tb2, she never gives up the person she was in tbm. she doesnt negate all of her wonderful qualities, like passion and care and genuineness, when she chooses to have new experiences.

yes, she walked out of her movie and left the wet side story characters behind, but it wasnt for nothing. she left an environment that wasnt fulfilling for her anymore in pursuit of a fuller life. she still had lots of love to give, and she set out to find mack and transfer her love and energy into their relationship. (shes gay your honor!!! but the point is) she chose to live authentically and knew that she deserved to become her best self, and when she returned to the movie, she brought back the lessons that she had learned in the real world.

in the real world, she got to do calculus and chemistry, make new friends, wear new clothes, invent, create, and excel. she gained admiration for her skills and the content of her character, rather than for the role she played in other peoples lives. she can rebuild a motorcycle AND lead a musical number, and she learned those things could coexist. her femininity could be part of her strength, rather than being seen as a weak point or something that precludes her from going on the bigger adventures. i cannot stress how important it is to see her embrace all of these pieces of herself, unapologetically, in a positive light, and without losing the people close to her!!!

lela is a fictional character, but she has always been my role model for living an honest, passionate life full of love both for myself and for others. lela queen of the beach was a result of the positive impact she had on her world when she used her newfound power, skills, and self-assuredness to enact change. wet side story transformed from being an antiquated narrative that young people had never heard of and didnt enjoy, to being a movie (lela queen of the beach) that mobs of teenagers bought tickets to watch on the beach, passionately dancing along, unified, to the opening number. it became the movie that inspired girls like mack to surf, and girls like alyssa to talk to their crushes. it was subversive and progressive for its time period, making it a classic that remained prominent for 60 years. and all of that power and influence came from one young woman, who was inspired by another young woman. role modeling is a multilayered theme in the teen beach movies, and personally, lela provides motivation for me to give my all, unapologetically, in situations where i can exert a positive impact.

lela symbolizes beating your fears and doubts, stepping out of your comfort zone, creating your own power, and becoming independent, all while staying true to yourself and honest with others. for all those reasons, she will always be a source of warmth and comfort for me.

#bro tell me why i cried writing this #shes so important to me #thank you again for asking all the best questions!!!#this is really fun i love pouring my soul out under read mores #answered asks #anons #gcwca secret santa #Anonymous

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yvvaine · 5 years

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ASOIAF hot takes ?

I’m not in the best mood right now as I have been working on an essay on the legality of war crimes all week (which is very uplifting in case you were wondering), but that kinda means I want to take out my frustration on something SO LETS JUMP IN:

1) Not much of a hot take but Dany is going be a villain, loves. Don’t misunderstand me: NOT. CRAZY. Nor will to be a sudden, last-minute twist either, looking at you Dumb & Dumber. She’ll be fully in control of her actions, impulsive with violence like she has a long habit of being, and it will end up having dire consequences that solidify her tyrannical tendencies. She’ll hurt and kill a lot more innocent people (more than she has has already….which is still more than a lot of people are comfortably admitting). And it will only become more apparent as the books continue. As the GRRM approved Meereenese Knot Essays basically stated: the dream sequence in the last novel was ultimately a turning point for Dany toward an even darker path where she embraces the family motto to a draconian degree.

2) It’s worth saying just for the record that I love Daenerys’ idealism and her crusade for a more just, equitable world (how much you think that crusade is actually for personal gain, survival, and/or ambition under the general guise of righteousness is on you though), but it ended up being pointless and ill-executed.

2B) On that point, I’m vehemently against those who counter any criticism of her crusade, specifically how she handled the crucifixion of all men wearing togas (which were a symbol of wealth, not just of owning slaves) over the age of 14, as being “pro-slavery” when that’s usually far, far from reality. I’d argue that though she tried to make the situation better, which is again admirable, she eventually becomes a glorified slaver herself, literally. “Mysa is a master”. Think about it, I mean at first she “liberates” cities based upon opportunity, and impulse, and what they can offer her, at that moment. But it’s a short term power/resource grab, and all she ends up doing is creating a bigger mess for the mostly-innocent people that live there, sentencing them to lives in horrid conditions like hunger, death, violence, and poverty. In Meereen she uses the people that she liberates (and its not like these “ex”-slaves had better options other than to follow her, or families elsewhere, etc. … plus to them she’s this albino goddess come out of ashes to save them who has these magical, thought-to-be-extinct dragons; it seems reasonable she’d amass a following on that alone) as her unpaid labor force in various inhumane conditions. Then the city becomes so mismanaged, chaotic, and violent because she is so inept at actually, ya know, ruling, that she allows said people to sell themselves BACK into slavery, SO LONG AS SHE GETS A 10% CUT…. sort of like A SLAVER. I just don’t think the metaphorical America in GRRM’s Afghanistan, considering how anti-war he is in real life, and how disastrous he’s said that that expression of imperialism actually was, is going to end up being the good, ethical guy you want in charge by the end of his novel allegorizing the triumphs and pitfalls of power. His whole point is that good intentions don’t guarantee good actions or good outcomes, however honorable that they might be. Short term decisions are just that; short term.

3) Sansa is not like Lysa in any way besides their casual connections to Littlefinger (of totally different natures) and their red fucking hair. I see a lot of gifsets or meta —usually by extreme Arya stans (which to be fair: you do you! I’m not about to sit here and tell anyone how much they should or shouldn’t love a particular character; the whole point of literature is that its entirely subjective and based off of emotional connection) — that states to some degree or another Arya = Lyanna and Sansa = Lysa when like….. no. I agree its very apparent that Arya shares a lot of personality and appearance-related attributes with her paternal Aunt, but that does not foil to her sister and other Aunt. If anything Arya has a stronger Lysa-connection with the whole “jealous of the more beautiful and dutiful red-haired older sister” thing. But that’s a silly and superficial parallel at best, just like claiming a connection to Lysa/Sansa because of shared geography and a “Tully look”. Moreover, on the Tully note, there’s nowhere that it says Sansa and Lysa look alike the same way the text explicitly says Arya and Lyanna do. They just both have red hair and blue eyes. That fact alone is not enough to constitute a parallel; in the books their face shape, eye color, physical figures, and other attributes like cheekbones are described totally different. Even the color of their red hair is described in different shades.

4) People need to stop discounting Sansa’s connections to Lyanna. Yes, they are not alike in looks or personality the way that Arya and Lyanna are, but their stories align very closely in many ways that Arya and Lyanna’s do not. Both were Northern princess with broken betrothals to “Baratheons”. Both were debatably romantically involved with Crown Princes. Both were given tourney roses. Both “kept/imprisoned” in the South. Both’s strengths were underestimated because of their beauty (Porcelain, Ivory, Steal, vs. You saw her beauty, but not the iron underneath). Their siblings went to war for them (and independence too) and their fathers and brothers were executed in the south, on the King’s orders. Both have strong song motifs, rose motifs, etc. And they share a lot of literary quotes besides their famous beauty v. metal parallel (i.e. “like a ghost, dead before her time” is repeated once in regards to Lyanna, and once again by Sansa, no other times). Just…. stop discounting them.

5) Arya’s story is not one of duty and ladyship, stop trying to fit her into that mold. She doesn’t want to be the wife, mother, or queen. In her own words: “Thats not me, that’s Sansa”. She’s finding herself and trying to survive while being true to who she is at the same — that’s her journey of personal growth. To accept her rebellious nature, her untamed wildness, her adventurous spirit and know it doesn’t make her a freak or bad at being a woman. While I know a lot of people might hope that the end of her journey is like, “I’ll be a queen of the people sitting at my desk doing paperwork and running a castle and kingdom and all that it involves”, but I would be sorely disappointed if that’s her endgame, the woman they’ve been trying to mold her into since the beginning. I can understand why: she understands the common folk and their needs, wants, and humanity, in ways that no other contender for queen does. Daenerys has always been a degree removed from the people, even when she wast technically supposed to be a part of them re: her marriage to Khal Drogo, and she has become further and further removed from the people she rules over ever since. Margaery doesn’t truly, truly care about them, but rather sees them and their love as a source of popularity/power. Cersei is Cersei. Sansa bought into the role of the “high dignified lady” and the class system that unwittingly upholds the duty she’d been taught to model, and though she is learning that its a load of crap - especially as the “bastard” Alayne - and has always been very, very kind throughout her imprisonment in Kingslanding to dealing Sweetrobin in the Eryie, she still has a long way to go before she is truly a lady of the people, (which i think is the crux of Sansa’s journey).

I think I’ll stop there - thats enough ranting for one day! It did make me feel a little bit better though, I have to say! Thank you for the ask dear

#Anonymous #asoiaf meta #meta #daenerys targaryen #sansa stark #arya stark

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deniigi · 5 years

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Hello! Just about to sit down and read your newest fic, so excited about it! I had a question for you (you very well may have answered this already, so sorry in advance!), but do you have advice for writing? Advice in terms of getting start, plotting out stories, helping get the creative juices flowing? I have all these ideas but seem to lack the drive to get things written out. I know the best advice is to just write, but I'm having a horrible time starting. What do you do in those moments?

Hello my dear!

Sorry for taking so long to get back to you. The lord has blessed me with a head cold and ruined all my plans of productivity for the day, so I can finally answer this ask! I’ll talk a little bit about both how to get started with a story and then some little things that help me motivate myself.

I have started a tag for writing advice here: http://deniigi.tumblr.com/tagged/writing-advice

This is going to be a long post, sorry mobile users.

I am going to preface all of this with the understanding that I am technically a professional writer in terms of like, a handful of ways, but I have absolutely zero training in creative writing, so take everything I say with a grain of salt!

So, I personally find that, on the whole, that psychological hurdle of getting started comes a lot from the anticipation of the kind of response a story will get (how many hits, how many comments, how many kudos) in addition to a bit of anxiety or fear over theloss of sustained interest in that story (by yourself and/or by your audience). I find that this can be alleviated by really, truly internalizing the understanding that you are allowed to write your work however you damn please, for whoever you damn please.

There will be work you write for others, and there will be work you write for yourself. Not all work needs to be published; sometimes, it is really nice to just write shit for yourself; it is a plus for humanity if you decide to share it with others, but you do not have to do that.

Furthermore, I would like to present you with this:

This is what my current folder for under fire looks like. And you might notice that there are almost always multiple drafts per chapter. Yes, I did in fact rewrite chapter four 5 fucking times, you bet your ass I did. And I’m not ashamed of it. I think the story is better for it. And that’s the important thing here: you do not need to produce a perfect draft the first time around. You will not produce that perfect draft. Accept this. Embrace this. Embrace it and your cat at the same time to really ingrain it as a warm, fuzzy feeling.

Liberate yourself from the pressure of needing to produce the perfect, most right draft and you may find starting the piece overall to be a much easier, more pleasant experience.

And along with this beautiful, uplifting spiritual advice, I also bring a practical thought: when it comes to getting started, a lot of times, people feel like they need to set the stage, yadda yadda yadda. Ha. No. Fuck that.

That’s a surefire way to bore the shit out of yourself. Start right in the middle of a scene that captivates you if that’s what you want to write. It’s a free platform. No one’s gonna arrest you if you stick Spiderman upside down in trash first thing. They might even applaud you actually, because you didn’t make them slog through some of that ‘It was the evening of the 25th and it was cold out in the streets” bullshit we all learned from Dickens.

Alright. Now let’s talk about actually getting started making words appear on paper.

So, from my knowledge there are generally two ways that folks write creatively. You have what I’m going to call the planners and then you what I’m going to call the monsters (I call them this entirely affectionately, I’m sure there’s a better word for these folks, but I don’t have it atm, all I have is a headcold). Planners are folks who sit down and work out their major plot points, who write outlines, and who create the scaffolding of their work before they set out on their magical journey. I think of these folks as architects.

And then you have the monsters and these are those fuckers who just sit down and write stream of consciously like the heathens all our high school teachers tried to teach us not to be.

I am both a planner and a monster. And a lot of that depends on the length of work I’m going for. I have never in my life planned a one-shot, for example. I just attack that as it is. I follow my heart, if you will. But when it comes to longer chaptered fics, I really do think that some outlining is super helpful.

You might find it useful for one-shots, though, I dunno. Maybe give it a try and see what happens?

The two main fics I’ve done proper outlines for are Inimitable and under fire and I actually find outlining to be immensely helpful in psyching me up to write the story (I go through and re-read my outlines when I start to lose interest or diverge too much from the plot outlined there in the actual writing. 9 times out of 10, re-reading gets me stupid excited to write all over again) and it also helps me keep momentum going throughout the plot.

Here’s a pic of some pages of under fire’s outline.

Physically writing the work is really important for me because it forces me to only put down key points/feelings/ideas I want to include, whereas typing gives me far too much room to get lost/distracted by extraneous detail. And since my handwriting is a teacher’s worst nightmare and I cross out shit and write huge with emotion, I’ll give you a little bit of what the middle page here says:

Miles-

there’s something thrumming

vibrating in his ears wherever he goes

-closes his eyes and somehow enters blackness- emptyness (Stranger Things style)

beat

“help.”

–BACK - everything is gone

closing his eyes doesn’t bring the space back

–it makes him panic. He doesn’t know why. His heart is pounding. He’s sweating He has a horrible feeling of doom.

beat

its gone.

he goes home anxiously. Pretends everything is normal.

his neck crawls

So basically it’s less of a formal outline and more of a collection of stream of consciousness feelings and screenplay directions which I’ll flesh out in the actual story.

Personally, I love writing these kinds of things because they get me pumped for the story I’m about to tell. I get to write out the key scenes and work through all the hard parts first, and then, while I’m writing, I work through the little fun details and banter and I have to write to figure out how we get from one scene to the next and I love the challenge of having to fit those pieces together. I very rarely stick strictly to my outline, (as anyone who is currently reading under fire can tell you right now), but I do try to stick to the main plot points in it and my writing is certainly better for it.

So yes. Outlining is very good, but it is even better when you do it to some kind of music. I listened to What’s Up Danger from the Into the Spiderverse soundtrack on repeat while I wrote this outline to kind of transfer some of the relentless pace conveyed in that song to the piece’s plot.

I highly recommend using music to set the mood of your piece while/before you write a piece of any length. It helps get you in the right headspace (excited or somber or angry) to write. You need emotion to write creatively. You can’t just make that happen sometimes; you need a little help.

A couple other things which might help:

1. Leave your house or the space you’re normally in. Go to a cafe and find a nice corner and have a think and a try in there. Sometimes moving to a different space helps you escape cyclical thinking patterns.

2. Write what you want to read. Don’t bother writing for other peoples’ interests; that’ll just bore the shit out of you all over again.

3. Find an atmospheric mood sound to listen to on Youtube or smth (I personally like Rain on a Car Windshield for slightly somber fics, but you might be into ocean storms or dripping caves or whatever).

4. Heat your feet. I don’t know why but I am entirely unproductive when my feet are cold. Maybe this one is me-specific, but whatevs. Heat the feets!

5. If you’re still having trouble just sitting down and pounding the story out, that’s okay! Maybe it’s not ready to be written yet. Maybe you’re not in the right headspace yet. Sometimes that’s just how it is. One story makes its way out in like, a hour, and the next one takes like, months to finally be written. We all work at different paces. We all write for different reasons.

It might help to figure out why you want to write a story before you write it. Like, if its for attention, it’s gonna be hard as hell. But if there’s an idea that you feel like is important or if there’s a mood you’re trying to work yourself into or out of, then that might be a little easier. For example, I wrote a piece called make it work which is about Fogs finding his motivation to be a lawyer and fight for justice when Kavanaugh was confirmed and I felt super helpless in the face of our present justice system. That story kind of wrote itself and it needed to be written, I feel, not just for me, but for others who were feeling just as helpless.

Writing is catharsis in that way. Maybe you just need to find out what you need to wring out of your soul.

Sorry that got very metaphysical. But I do want to stress that getting started and ending a story are the hardest parts of writing them, so you are definitely not alone if you feel like you’re ramming your head into a wall here.

I hope something here helps you, my dear!

#fic #writing advice #fanfiction #managingmischiefsince1988

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the-kipsabian · 5 years

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Please do this at your convenience but like. Can you put me together a playlist of what you consider to be Danny's best vocals? Or his best work in general? Nsp, starbomb, skyhill? I just want a good starting place

dude, honestly tho? i would be absolutely honored to do this

k so aaaAAAA lets start with. skyhill i guess since thats the first one on the line? (technically i think northern hues is the first band he was in that published stuff but i havent listened to it myself so i dont knoooow anything about it other than what i just read from a comment on a youtube video and that is that it definitely sounds like the kind of music dan would have made in his stoner days which probably was true lol)

skyhill has a lot of really good chill songs tho? i personally really love ‘the city as you walk’ and ‘black & white’ the most i think - both are like lyrically really nice to listen to and the chorus especially in black & white is just hnggg. its so good tbh. but really any skyhill songs are good! they arents. as advanced vocally as his later stuff obviously, since this band is like. 12 years old at this point at least but its nice chill stuff with honestly really nice but simple lyrics if you want some good stuff to listen to as a break from all the dick jokes and whatnots that nsp and starbomb have to offer tho!

starbomb is honestly a bit more difficult tho cause its like. much more arin-heavy with the raps and such? but! lets not have that fool us cause there are still plenty of quality songs with pretty vocals by dan tho! ..also hahaa i think its needless to say but hey heres a heavy nsfw warning for these songs

‘mega marital problems’ is a personal favorite, mostly cause dan does like. three different voices in this one? and its hilarious. also if you listen in the chorus parts, you can hear the layered singing he does and its honestly just so good mmmm

‘crasher-vania’ i feel like im gonna betray myself if i dont put this on the list for multiple reasons. 1. its EASILY the most popular song on the album. 2. its freaking fantastic, with the story and the lyrics. 3. the chorus, again? (as dan most often did the chorus work on the first album!) it sounds beautiful and especially in the second chorus, you can hear him emoting it out with the lyrics. 4. the background music. if you stop to listen to it, its honestly so good? like, its very simple, yes, but it works and it just sounds awesome. always brings a smile on my face to listen to those tasty keyboard jams ~

im gonna add ‘regretroid’ here too, as its a personal favorite too. but also his voice. goes so high? and it sounds nice?? also this song is just banging with a female feature vocalist! which is real nice!!

as for the second starbomb album! im separating it a little cause woo the boys honestly improve a lot between the albums (which is crazy cause theres only like. a year? year and a half at max? between these two albums so i cant even think how good the third one is gonna sound with five years between albums and how good current nsp sounds lol)

‘smash!’ i gotta mention cause its like. the single song from the album i feel like? also cause mark is in it! and they all sound rad and yeah it doesnt have exactly too much singing but what it has sounds. so freaking good tho mmmmm i lov

‘glass joe’s title fight’ is a must on this tho cause like. this is the one starbomb song thats so much more sing than rap heavy and hngggg its so good

‘god of no more’ okay but. dans vocals in this are gorgeous. and its a super fun song too. so its a win-win

and as a personal favorite, im just gonna throw ‘robots in need of disguise’ here cause i love this song. no other reason really lol

and thennnnn we arrive to the glory that is ninja sex party! i could be a little shit and just say to listen to all lol, but im gonna try to pick things here and there among my favorites! trying to also go by album order with these ~ also nsfw warning for this but idk what you expect with a band called ninja sex party tho

‘nsp theme song’ i mean. come on. you gotta start somewhere so lets go with this lol. and its hilarious (and kinda cute but maybe thats just me lol) and the lyrics are just. well what you’d expect with the name of the song. its very simple vocal-wise, but other than that, grade a stuff tho

‘dinosaur laser fight’ is just a classic, so here you go. its wonderful and weird and animated by arin so aaaaaa!

..also i wanna add ‘objects of desire’ here cause this song is like. lyrical genius tbh. its fucking weird but its also like a ballad so theres some nice vocal stuff here too so yay. thingssssss

‘unicorn wizard’ i honestly wouldnt be true to myself if i didnt add my FIRST nsp song to this list, the one that got me listening to these fools cause mmm. this song is ridiculous and but also lyrics? are so good?? idk how that combo works out but it does and its beautiful. also dannys vocals in the chorus are mmmmm. so solid

‘fyi i wanna f your a’ im not even ashamed to say this is one of my faves tbh. its just. the glorious kind of weird and this is like one of my favorite examples of how well these nerds write lyrics tho? also such a hard song to learn the lyrics tho, but its so worth it, trust me lol. aLSO DAN HARMONIES IN THE SECOND PART GIVE ME SO MUCH LIFE HOLY SHIT

‘let’s get this terrible party started’ gets a special mention cause of the badass jams tbh. also the lyric ‘its a ninja sex party party’ gets me every fucking time. even after five years of listening to this song lol

oooof attitude city is so hard to pick just few songs from tho aaaa. but, as ive done about three from every album so far, lets try that with this one too. tho honestly just. listen to the entirety of attitude city its so good mmm. but. lets start with what i personally feel is the most underrated song on the album, ‘peppermint creams’. i dont think i need to say more than holy shit the emotions tho? especially in the chorus cause mmm. my heart

‘attitude city’ gets here too tho cause like. im personally very nostalgic for this song as it was the first real hype i had for the album so yeah. also its honestly just a really good song. also the video. includes dancing. and we all should know how i feel about dan dancing so mmmMMM im biased as shit i admit it

‘cookies!’ i wanna put this here cause it shows the how stupidly versatile these nerds are with their songs, cause this is badass and silly cute at the same time and hngg. also visually? demon!dan is way too much of a guilty pleasure. judge me all you want i donT CARE

..also i just gotta mention ‘samurai abstinence patrol’ cause of the vocal work. and just cause this song was in progress for four years before this final form and its beautiful honestly. also ‘danny french kissed a girl like he was the king of versailles’ will never get old to me gosh

I SWEAR IM DONE WITH ATTITUDE CITY AFTER THIS but also ‘6969′ is a must to mention. its an eight and half minute song but its just. amazing at everything. beautiful jams and awesome vocals. its gorgeous tbh, a masterpiece

‘cool patrol’. first of all cause apparently i “traumatized” one of my friends by making him watch the video to this and yeah. this is vocally one of my absolute favorites from them tho, dan sounds amazing in both styles, and its just. so positive and cute and aaaaa. its just such an uplifting song i love it

‘danny don’t you know’ cause this one made my cry the first few times i listened to it and its just. so relatable. also fucking beautiful vocals tho and yes the lyrics are personal which makes it even more emotional song. hnggg i love this so much tho cause it just. goes from kind of a ballad to a more of a rock song and its amazing. development similar to the story its telling

‘first date’ i mean. i gotta put my current fave song of theirs here, right? RIGHT? personally i love this cause its just a positive song, in a way i guess, but it stays true to the original nsp style and the lyrics are just perfect for their song about dating tbh. especially with how it just keeps getting gradually weirder and weirder. its just perfection hnggg i love this song. so much. god its so good (honestly tho if you give me a lyric like ‘i’ll take you back to your place and we’ll craft the perfect alibi’ idk how you expect me, a thriller writer, not to absolutely love this song to hell and back)

‘courtship of the mermaid’ idk how you expect me to make a list without this. the emotions in the vocals of this song are beautiful and its, again, hilariously absurd. as a mermaid princess i highly approve of this song

‘mansion party’ its so sad there will probably never be a video of this song cause they want to film it in an actual mansion and so far they havent mentioned that they got a chance to do that so mmmm. cause this song is so fucking banging it deserves a video honestly. the chorus is like. one of the few things in this world that makes me wanna dance. and also theres so many genius lyrics in this that its just pure gold all the way through tbh (also how do you smoke champagne? asking for a friend)

one more i swear, but the whole cool patrol album is so good hngg. but! ‘smooth talkin’’! in all of its absurdity is a must to listen to. its just what the title says, about how smooth danny is with talking to ladies. im not gonna explain more just. it goes as well as you’d expect at this point

..this is already super long but hey did you know we are still missing the two cover albums tho??

‘everybody wants to rule the world’ this one makes me wanna cry every single time. its so nice and emotional and just. a+ vocals. its just beautiful

‘subdivisions’ idk what it is really with this song but these lyrics just fit together with dan’s voice so well its just. hnggg so gorgeous? i mean it might be cause its a rush song but also yeah. its so good

‘africa’ i mean i already told you, but his vocals are so nice in this and they fit into the style of the song so well. plus africa is a beautiful song to begin with so its a win-win really

‘pour some sugar on me’ cause oh boy my pal isnt this song just banging mmmmmmMMMMM

and for the finale! ‘heat of the moment’! like. everything about this song is just really good okay? the vocals and especially the music itself is like mmm i love it?? also the cowbell. idk what it is with that in this song, but it just. it sounds so good with dan’s vocals and aaaaa

..have i rambled enough? is this a good list?? literally just mmm anything from any of these bands is a good listen, these are just mostly my personal faves or what i feel like would be the best representations of what they are about!

#oooof this got long lmao #at least it kept me from taking a nap cause this took like. over an hour to do lol #its all good tho im more than happy to spread the word of my favorite babes! <3 #..i was also originally gonna add in a couple of my fave grump remixes but i think this is already long enough as it is haaaaa #maybe some other time!#anyways i hope you enjoy this and my small descent to madness that you can probably see in this LOL #<33 #coughedfeathers #thank you for asking! <3

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angelreys-blog · 5 years

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Change...it's inevitable.

Life is a guarantee of only one thing....change. It seems we are always experiencing some form of it whether in relationships, employment, finances, living conditions, etc. In some of these cases we want and crave change and it seems to come slow. Other change comes unexpected and is sadly often tragic or traumatic. But change comes none the less. In fact, some life changes we have actually named. Menopause is known as "the change" for women and "mid-life crisis" for men. Yes, I believe men go through menopause. Lol! When all of our children leave the house, which is a huge adjustment in the world of change, we call that "empty nest". Of course the hardest changes are those that involve relationships and finances.

Friends come and go, only few are lifelong, if we have the privilege of experiencing a life long friend. Sometimes family or those we deem family separate themselves in some way or another, sometimes through divorce, and ironically sometimes through marriage. Other times it is just due to life taking people in different directions or those people trying to figure out the direction of their life; whatever the case...change will come and how we deal with those changes has a great deal to do with the core of our charcter as a human being, the growth or deterioration of that character.

The last couple years in my own life have been the most challenging I have ever faced in my adulthood. My life was introduced to financial disaster, loss of loved ones, friends, businesses, credit, our credibility, and sadly whatever good reputation we had because people judge based only on what they see right in front of them or worse what they hear from others. What we had worked to build over years was lost in what seemed like a moment. A loss so great for us as it involved every aspect of our lives. It hasn't just been financial in losing our businesses, income, and properties, including our home. We lost friends that were family to us. We saw separation within our immediate family. We walked through an immediate family member recieve a diagnosis of cancer and within a few months was gone. It was all incredibly devastating.

I had never felt more alone in life and many times asked God to let me die because I couldn't figure out how to overcome this life-altering place I was in. At that time we lived in a town that printed everything in the paper and to put it mildly we were a weekly occurance due to the lawsuits from the downfall of my husbands company. We tried to sell whatever we could, pay what we could, but ultimatley the debt was so large we couldn't seem to make a dent. The downfall of my husband's business and the people it hurt nearly destroyed him. He went into a dark place that I didn't know he would ever escape from. He wanted to drown out the voices, the death threats, the bill collectors, and the loss he couldn't fix. Our marriage nearly ended and frankly I don't really know how we were able to survive except for the love and grace of God.

I found myself hiding away rarely ever leaving the house unless it was absolutely necessary. I would pray I didn't see anyone because I couldn't take hearing another person tell me they saw our names in the paper again with their judgement and disdain. Not that they intended to be hurtful, or most anyway, they didn't understand how awful it had been and any reminder of it only threw me backwards. Only a few people actually took the time to find out the whole story, most just believed whatever they read or whatever someone else told them. The hardest part was that most of those who were Believers with us never reached out with any form of real help or advice even when we sought it. I saw a side of Christiandome that I hope I can be part of changing.

It seemed when we were doing well we were accepted, supported, help was more then available. When our world fell apart it was as if we had leprosy and everyone scattered. I am not talking about one church in particular. We knew people that attended several different churches. I'm talking about the church as a whole. I am not angry or bitter. I even somewhat understand because I used to behave the same way before this to some degree. Not that I realized it then but certainly do now.

We had only God and some small shred of hope that we had some kind of fight left in us.

Now, a couple years later, still walking through the aftermath of it all as we face the only choice we had left to attempt to rebuild our lives; we see so many things we could not see until healing began.

We don't blame "the church" or those Christians who chose to judge rather than to help. They were just following the examples set before them that sadly teaches when your doing we'll God is blessing you and when your not it must be because your disobedient. Though I realize my situation is not fully comparable to Job's, and though I cannot claim that we didn't make some mistakes and bad choices along the way, I certainly have an understanding about how he must have felt that I didn't have before. I have also found that I am certainly less likely to assume whats happening in someones life than I once was, which I am truly grateful for. God allowed this for a purpose and my part in all of it is to take responsibility of my own behaviors, actions, and decisions. For me to learn and grow and use it to help others. Especially those in similiar situations reminding them they are not alone.

I cannot know what is yet to come or how all of this will work out but my God does. This has not turned me from Him but has pressed me into a deeper place with Him. I could be angry because He could have stopped all this but He never promised me a wonderful life on earth. Yes, he did say we would have life abundantly but that is very different than comfort and ease though sometimes He does allow us those pleasures. However, the definition of abundant is actually this...existing or available in large quantities; plentiful. I don't believe Jesus was talking about money and comfort here but instead he was talking about Himself. That He is available to those who believe in Him and call on His name and accept with thier whole heart that He is the life, the truth, and the only way to God, the Father. He was saying that with Him at our side, no matter what we face, we will have life abundantly because of the inner joy only He can provide. That peace passes all understanding. In fact, He told us that in this world we will have trouble but not to worry because He conquered the world. He is the abundance, not what the world has to offer.

He has shown me there is so much good in all of this hardship and loss. These irreplaceable understandings and lessons that are priceless. Without this dark place my character could not have further developed positively, my faith would not have been rooted deeper, and my eyes could not have been given a greater depth of vision to see hardship differently.

Here's my conclusion...

Don't assume...if you want to know ask but only if you want to know because you truly care about the well being of the person your asking. Otherwise it is just for the sake of gossip.

If you are afraid to ask but genuinely want to help, don't speak what you don't know but instead pray fervently for God's will in the life of whomever you are praying for or whatever situation you are praying over.

If you are the one going through a great hardship, let yourself feel but don't give yourself that permission without also being in the Word to help guide you through it. The enemy will always use our dark places to attempt to turn us against God. We must guard ourselves.

If you are facing a situation you cannot fix, especially one that has caused hardship for others, you have to decide to trust that God is fixing it in His time. We do not often understand God's ways and He reminds us of that when He says in the Word...My ways are not your ways and my thoughts are not your thoughts. God never allows something that won't end up benefitting many. Whatever He is teaching you through your situation, He is using to teach whomever has been effected what He wants them to learn as well. Trust in His timing even when others talk about you, say you have no right to do God's work or even proclaim to be a Believer. Don't ever forget they said those same things about our Savior and He reminds us in His Word that we are not greater than our Master. So stand firm and walk out the path God has you on however long it may take to make things right.

Lend a hand. When you see someone hurting, no matter what you may feel, take them for coffee or dinner. Make them laugh or simply listen and then pray with them right there. We all need to hear and feel those prayers so don't be afraid to be bold in that. It is truly the most encouraging and uplifting thing we can do for one another.

Even if you disagree with someones opinion, don't argue. If what they seem to believe doesn't line up with the Word and they claim to be a Christian ask them how often they read the Word. Most of the time they aren't reading and studying it. Being in church and listening to a preacher or listening to other preachers, speakers, or teachers is not listening to God. God is our teacher first. Everyone else should simply be confirmation of what God is teaching us and if they aren't, stop listening! Encourage others in love to read what the actual writer Himself wrote. Even if its only two verses a day to start. Then pray over them every time you think of them.

Lastly, do unto others as you would have them do unto you. We live in a world that screams...ITS ALL ABOUT ME! ME! ME! Thats not what Jesus taught us. Attempt to put yourself in someone elses place. Get to know them and learn a bit about where they come from and what they have walked through and you might find yourself surprised at how understanding someone can change your perception.

There it is again...change. It may be inevitable but how we respond to it often holds more power and influence than we can understand.

Learn from every situation and change well.

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fuckmogai · 6 years

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whats the story

OK so i had this friend in hs. actually she was my best friend and we had a whole friend group, etc. senior year she gets this bf (after the longest, most irritating and dramatic sequence of events) and starts ignoring me completely. removing me from group chats, telling me to not come to group events, etc. it was literally the worst and my self esteem was at like zero. and at the end of the year, she and her bf break up and the aftermath is so bad (bc of a stunt she pulled) that she literally drops out of hs to finish her shit online.

so anyways. we graduate, go to separate colleges hours and hours apart, and i dont see her for a year. and i grow. i find a bf who i adore and love and a group of friends who genuinely care about me and try to uplift me. im happy. and towards the end of college she texts me.

she’s changed, apparently. shes gotten a new bf, and a new group of friends, and apparently shes grown. so im like fuck it, whatever. i hang out with her this summer.

it took two weeks for me to realize she hasnt changed at all. shes still a really awful person, just this vicious, judgmental beast. so basically were sitting in her car and she asks me why i didnt reach out to her after she dropped out of high school. and i told it to her straight- “i didnt try to contact you because i didnt want to. you were a bad friend.” bc thems the facts lmao. and she pulls out this excuse: “my bf told me he didnt want me to talk to you.” a damn lie bc i was friends w her bf before they dated. but i was like, ok whatever. lets pursue this line of thinking. so i say, “why does that matter? he doesn’t control you. you made the conscious decision to be horrible to me for six months.” and she tried to say it was bc of her depression. and i told her that that didnt matter. then she told me it was bc everyone hated me and she was embarrassed to be around me. which really stung, but i knew it wasnt true, bc ppl continued to hang out w me after she dropped out.

THEN she tells me that she was assaulted when she was thirteen. and i was completely speechless. she had never told me that before. after a moment of shock i asked how that was relevant to our conversation. she said “im willing to do anything for my partner, even if it means abusing people.” girl BYE. i told her that didnt matter. and she tried to be like “you dont care that i was raped??” and i asked her where i said that.

anyways the conversation devolved into this cycle of me saying “thats not an excuse for your behavior.” bc i just wanted her to own up to the kind of person she is and i mean now ik im never gonna get that but anyways. it just kept going and i just gave up. once someone has it in them that they can emotionally abuse their friends and partners bc of their own issues theyre completely hopeless. anyways i wasted 2.5 years of my life on this dumbass and i wish i could get them back bc i wouldve had way more self esteem and better friends than i did. her recklessness and attitude led to me getting shit from ppl that was undeserved just bc i was her best friend.

and to be perfectly honest, i was afraid of her. i was afraid to stand up to her, afraid to leave her. that conversation was the most taxing one ive had in a very long while. i had to call my boyfriend to have him calm me down, just because i was very close to a panic attack from it. my relationship with her was not healthy at all- it was extremely unbalanced and toxic and horrible and until she figures out how to reflect on herself and her own personality and actions and learn how to treat others, she will never be happy.

so anyways. ppl who try to use their own trauma as an excuse to abuse others are Trash and should not be dealt with.

#ask #this is the condensed version btw #im omitting some details bc she has a tumblr and idk if shell see this but idc anymore bc she cant hurt me

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tinysidestrashcaptain · 7 years

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I'm back but I don't feel like a stalker yet thats probs a bad thing Anyway I got some numbers for you 2 3 8 15 17 18 and one you want to answer but no one asked yet

2. You know, I can't say as I've ever found a writer who thinks EXACTLY like me, but @cefmua56 thinks a great deal like me and @pirate-patton writes adorable fluff that always makes me squeal with glee!3. Well, in this Fandom I identify with Logan and Patton a great deal. In Doctor Who, I identified with Donna Noble a lot...and the Ponds. In Harry Potter, I identified with Neville, Remus and sometimes Hermione. In LOTR, my favorite character were Merry, Pippin, Boromir and Faramir. I'm very loosely into Dan and Phil and Jacksepticeye as well, though I wouldn't say I'm more than a casual part of those fandoms. 8. Oh jeez, music! My musical taste is all over the place. The thing is, as much as I love it, it's not the artists themselves that I connect with. It's the music that moves or inspires me, so to ask what musical ARTIST I connect with, well the answer is no one. I don't ever go digging into their personal lives or look for info on any of them. I know that's going to seem odd to a lot of people, but it's the truth! I could probably bump into some of my favorite musicians and not even realize it. It's always surprising when I see a live performance or spot an article that has a picture and I go "huh...so that's what 'insert name here' looks like....". I guess I'm just weird that way. 😶15. Five most influential books? Little Women, because I read it in 4th grade and decided I could be like Jo and be who I wanted to be, without apology. The Velveteen Rabbit, because it fundamentally changed me as a person. When little Me read that book, my whole perspective on toys shifted. I have some very cute stories I could share, but I think I'll save them for a Tiny Sides story. George's Marvelous Medicine, because that book brought me closer to my brother in a time when our relationship was contentious at best. We both loved it, found it hilarious. Where The Sidewalk Ends, because Shel Silverstein inspired my love of poetry. And finally Maus (the graphic novel), because my school didn't go nearly as far into the horrors of the Holocaust as it should have, and that book made me ask questions and seek education that made me the kind of person who values kindness and compassion.17. Ahhh, a tricky question! Yes, in that this is definitely who I am, but also there is more to me than simply this. I don't put up a front or present an idealised version of myself, but I don't always share everything, either. There are struggles I face that I endure privately, or things I don't mention sometimes. And it isn't that I'm "hiding" anything, it's just that I am a relatively private person and I prefer to keep this blog as an uplifting place where we can all go when we're having a bad day to feel a little better. I am far more likely to be down or self-deprecating on my main than here. So...yes and no.18. What's my patronus? Logan Freaking Sanders. He destroys all my enemies with his rap battle skills.

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qcrip · 7 years

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the idea that the reason people date mentally ill people is to ‘save us’ or some ‘savior complex’ is super uncomfortable to me because like, yes people do this, but the trope is like way too common

Like I could never point out the reasons but when I was young it made me feel like it was toxic that I repeatedly fell for other mentally ill people when in reality it wasn’t because I wanted to save them. They just understood my experience better than neurotypicals and respected my access needs and knew how to hold space and use trigger warnings and understood when I displayed visible symptom and knew how to gently call me in when my symptoms were unproductive and/or harmful.

And in the same vein it made me worry no one would ever love me if they weren’t saving me which made me feel like I had to lie to people i loved (even platonically) that they were the one finally fixing me somehow, and probably was super toxic for them because it’s a lot of pressure to have someone put that kind of responsibility on you especially bc it wasn’t even real.

And the point is even when that trope is turned on it’s head it’s showing relationships where one person wanted to save the other and it didn’t work (cough paper towns cough) but I can think of very very few stories thats just… People loving mentally ill people let alone mentally ill people loving each other where it’s healthy and not about curing each other and not about aggravating each other for the plot arch either.

Like being mentally ill and managing healthy relationships is super hard when you have 0 examples of how it works and I know a lot of us who figured it out and do it, but also a lot of people who don’t even know what a healthy relationship would look like while having symptoms/illness especially younguns and like, we need to really uplift any content we find that has that and make more of it whenever we can.

#long post #5:30 am rants?#this is a ok to reblog

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fanfictionlive · 5 years

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A Melancholic Rant (and Cautionary Tale)

(This isn't a request for advice, just me getting something off my chest. I imagine I'll be called out for being a baby but oh well..)

I've been loving this subreddit. So far, most people I've met here have been supportive, kind, and super enthusiastic for writing. Its been such an uplifting thing to read everyone's posts here and I'm so glad I found this little nook of the internet.

But seeing a million posts of people saying "I got a massive review today!" or "I was PM'd by my favorite author and they said they love my story!" has made a little green eyed monster appear in my head. I don't begrudge these people at all, I'm happy for them! But I also wish I had some of their success...

Me and my buddy have been working on a longfic for quite a while now. It was started a few years ago, taken down when we felt like giving up on it, and then re-uploaded when we realized we couldn't stay away. Some of you may know that it's considered bad form to take down a fic you've given up on, as doing this prevents anyone who used to read your story from rereading it. We didn't know this at the time, as we were total newcomers to Fanfiction. Now, I deeply regret that we did this.

We thought reploading would ultimatly be a net positive, as we were better writers by this point and we could redo our old chapters to make them better written, more emotional, full of more life and whatnot. Surely, we would get back to our original count of followers/favorites, and then probably surpass it, right?

Wrong.

Our fic's reupload has released 8 chapters by this point, and over the last few months, after getting us into 8 different communities, uploading advertisement posts on our fandom's subreddit, and reaching out to authors and readers willing to give us feedback, we've gotten 4 followers who seem to keep up with us regularly, no favorites, and one guy who wrote a review of chapter 1 after I swapped stories with him. A few others ff writers have read it after I asked for feedback, and they've all said some version of "Its super well written, but not my cup of tea."

Ouch.

I know this isn't really a problem. At least no one has said they think its downright bad, so theres that. And for my buddy, this is not a problem at all. He doesn't write these chapters as if anyone is listening anymore, content to simply write what he thinks is fun and entertaining to read. I'm proud of him for doing that, and I know I should follow his example. Also, I in absolutely no way begrudge anyone who has passed us over, told us its not their thing, or been silent in the review section- I get it. Not everyone is going to be inspired by our work and nobody owes us anything.

Honestly, I even get why our Fic is probably not doing well: Its a very hard sell. Its a slow burn adventure drama, very wordy in prose, super out there in concept for an AU, and it focuses very heavily on a large cast of OC's, which our fandom is absolutely downright notorious for writing poorly (which, yeah, is pretty fair.)

But, man, all that being said, I want what yall' got so very badly. I just wish one person would speak up, reach out to us without us begging for it first, and let us know that theyre looking forward to our next update. Thats good enough, for me to know we're preforming to a crowd which, no matter how small, is truely excited to know what happens next.

We used to have a little circle of people who did stuff like that. They used to read every chapter, tell us which parts made them laugh, leave reviews criticizing our bad transitions, and so on and so forth. We loved it! It was our own little circle of writers, giving each other ongoing feedback and being pleasant with each other. But it seems all those fellows have departed from the site since then, perhaps having moved on from writing Fanfiction. I hope they're all doing well, they were some very friendly people. But nowadays? Nothin' but radio silence.

Im practically begging for compliments, I know, and Im aware of how thats pretty pathetic. Which is why Im not going to plug my fic here; because I dont want pity points. But dont any of you also find it disheartening to see others try their best and win crowds-worth of people's follows/kudos/favorites, only to then try and do the same to no affect? Someone on here said a commenter actually wrote a little scene in their review that was essentially a fanfiction of their fanfiction. That's awesome! I so envy any of you who have accrued that level of feedback and praise.

Despite all this, I don't have any plans to give up on our fic. At the end of the day, I believe earnestly that we're telling a story that is, despite its (probably many) flaws, a story worth hearing, and collaborating with my friend on it makes me genuinly happy as it has helped us stay in touch over the last few years. That's good enough reason to see it to completion. But I cant deny that something about all of this feels remarkably lonely.

And let this be a lesson to any of you who haven't yet committed the sin of taking your unfinished fic down: There's no reason to assume anyone will come back after you do so. Just mark it as "Permanent Hiatus" in the description and come back when you feel ready, or leave it up to be discovered by someone who might at least enjoy whats there. My situation likely wouldn't be different had I left the original one up, but it would be nice to look up some of those old reviews and remember the good old days. Now I can only hope that previous success will return to us.

Anyway, I just wanted to share my woes. No advice needed, besides perhaps a reminder that writing for its own sake is what really matters.

submitted by /u/-SpookitheGhost- [link] [comments] from FanFiction: Where Magical Ponies battle Imperial Titans https://ift.tt/2ObOuUG

#fan fiction #writing #fanfiction #tv show #series #movie #fan #write

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