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kirby-the-gorb · 1 year

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reply roundup!

would you believe I was actually planning to do this the very morning the [licorice gorb] got blazed (obviously it was a better idea to put it off until after it was over)

also someone reblogged it with a screencap where it says "blazed by notpikaman" under my username and tbh I am so glad I'm not the only one burdened by that information XD and thank you to everyone who said "good blaze op" or some variant thereof, a high compliment

anyway welcome all you new followers and also folks who just wanted to reblog the one thing and be on your merry way, I do this occasionally so that I actually get to reply to y'all's tags n such <3 (without making a lot of blog clutter)

we also have a couple new image descriptions! thank you to @cherrycreamsicle for the image description on [suitcase] and @istherewifiinhell for the image description on [kirbear]! both have been added as alt text to the original posts, with credit.

on [the last roundup] @cherrycreamsicle said: Hey no worries! Any accessibility is good accessibility! I'm always happy to help! Hope you and your wife are doing well ^_^

thank you! I felt like it was important to acknowledge that putting it in alt text is not as good for some people as putting it in the body of the post, but it is still definitely better to have. (and thank you! she's doing much better now.)

on [watch] @ceylonsilvergirl said: Do it!! Watch repairs!! Those skills are so niche and needed And especially good for people inclined to pay attention to the details

it just seems really fun! I love little mechanical things and building miniatures and stuff like that so it feels like something I'm capable of! (also I can do it at home for only a couple hours at a time and possibly still make money lol)

on [watch] @macro-microcosm said: i hope you guys make big bucks in a lil watch biz some day

thanks! I'm sure I'd badger my beige-loving partner into letting me make at least one of them my signature kirby-pink lol

on [eggroll] @ceylonsilvergirl said: You felt good enough to go out without mobility aids!! You felt that good! That’s fantastic news! Of course use them when you need them, they’re good! But your body was doing well! That’s whats important

yeah!! it's important to me to emphasize to others that it's not the not using the aids it's the feeling well enough to not need to, cuz it's a mistake that's like. pretty common and even popular. (consider "wow this wheelchair user walked the stage at their graduation and was clearly in pain the whole time" type of stuff. the ubiquity of that type of "inspiration porn" has a huge impact on the disabled community, especially because a significant portion of us are exposed to that first rather than the realities of being disabled.) but feeling well even for one day means my body is still capable of feeling well under the right circumstances, and that matters!

on [kirbear] @hobgirl told a nice story I feel weird about copy/pasting directly but yknow it's there in the tags as long as they choose to leave it up

stuff like that is scary, and the doctors and veteran patients know that! I'm glad you had something comforting with you, and that it was able to lead to even more support than just what it carried by itself.

on [printer] @angst-and-fajitas said: every time I've ever interacted with a printer it has always felt like this and @ceylonsilvergirl said: I have yet to meet a printer that will just friggin’ work

honestly like 90% of the time printers work fine and I don't even think about it, but that last 10% of the time feels like Such A Trial that it really dominates the conversation lol

anonymous asked: Happy kirby day mx gorb :>

thank you! this is what reminded me to actually draw kirby a little cake so it was helpful lol

on [licorice] @ceylonsilvergirl added the [link] for the exact candy I was thinking of

so glad they still exist tbh. don't even remember if I've ever had one I'm just glad they exist!

on [meds] @queenhippolyta said: Do you find that the cromolyn helps you? I started it maybe two months ago but haven’t really noticed a difference yet

it seemed helpful for me when recovering/restabilizing from my covid vaccine, which laid me out for months, but there was a lot of other stuff going on and it was more of a, well, stabilizer than an actual boost. I really don't know if it's doing anything for me now as high vs low compliance really doesn't seem to make a causative difference. (there is a correlation, because on bad days it's harder to get up and take it in the middle of the day, but that's like. definitely not causative.) it might be that different dosing would work better for you, or it might be that it just doesn't really help you! mcas is a tricky beast, as we all know. (I hope you actually find this buried in the roundup >n< )

on [corner] @ceylonsilvergirl said: dang kirbo’s on the ceiling again, grab the broom

this one just made me laugh

on [licorice] @thesleepingnini said: hay wanna draw some silly stuff like this again, baka may sponsor ng ipad diyan

good news, I will continue to draw silly stuff again whether I'm paid or not! additional good news, for those who want more specific silly stuff drawn commissions are open on [kofi] for a few more hours (~6 probably depending how long this post takes me to finish)

@sonisis asked: iEs El Kirbo!

it sure is!

on [licorice] @jenjensd said: It’s a good thing they clarified it’s red liquorice because I legit thought they just gave Kirby a super long tongue for some reason

I wouldn't put it past me tbh (which is why I specified XD )

anonymous asked: Hi your Kirbys are very nice

thank you! I love to draw a Little Guy

on [crowd] @ceylonsilvergirl said: Like when you’re singing to yourself, and then realize people can see you

whoops you've activated one of my fun facts! whenever I am Out And About by myself (which is very very rare these days What With The Illness), I am almost always singing. I am completely comfortable singing at full volume at any time and any place (aside from general noise decorum such as "not in the library" and "not while my wife is sleeping"). so I have not had this specific version of this problem in my lifetime lol

anonymous asked: “Art” that a four year old could do? Don’t quit that day job at target.

look ma, my first anon hate! I'm big time now!

for real though, like, I wanna answer this one kinda seriously even though I'm sure this was just a driveby, because I know it's a common insecurity. why are you upset? if anyone can do it, why shouldn't I? why aren't you?

I make very very very little money from this blog (I even looked up the numbers, in the nearly 5 years I've been doing this I've made a total of ~$1650 to date), but that's because I'm really not putting in effort to make it ~profitable~. my patreon is has no rewards and my commissions are closed (except for literally right now), I only put very rare purposefully designed products on my print-on-demand stores and I haven't made my own stickers to sell in over a year. so if you're mad about people giving me money, don't be. even if you very very conservatively assume only 10 minutes per drawing and also zero other time put into running this blog, that's bare minimum 295 hours I've put into this. in reality it's going to be way way higher than that, but even if you assume I'm only drawing 10 minutes a day for 1771 days and I'm only drawing with no other admin etc, that's only $5.50 an hour, or about $0.93 per drawing.

part of why I don't put in the effort to make it ~profitable~ is because I can't. when my patreon had actual rewards and my commissions were always open and I was still making stickers, that took a ton of energy, and yes it made me a little more money than I'm getting right now, those two years are the period of time the majority of it came from, but it was energy I don't have. I'm disabled, severely chronically ill, and very vocal about it. I don't have a day job to quit because I physically can't do that. but that's also why I can't put in the energy to make this blog a ~business~, and even when I was putting in more energy than I actually had, it was not exactly big returns. I think the biggest most profitable year was like. $800. for the whole year. I made 5 times that doing data entry for a couple hours a week before that company shut down the same year, and the data entry was easier.

so okay, I'm not doing it for the money. (money sure would be nice to have, and I appreciate the patrons who stick around just cuz and the commissions that got picked up this week, but clearly that's not my motivation because there's not much money in running this blog.) then why should I bother?

because making stuff is fun. I get to draw silly little things that make me happy and sometimes other people like them too. that's it. what's the harm in that?

#text #title text #reply roundup #asks answered #long post #readmore #cherrycreamsicle #istherewifiinhell #ceylonsilvergirl #macro-microcosm #hobgirl #angst-and-fajitas #anonymous #queenhippolyta #thesleepingnini #sonisis #jenjensd

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sin-sidejob · 2 years

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Hi! Can i have a ship? I am pansexual, my pronuons is She/Her. My skin is brown with many freckles and my hair is a bit long and straight, I have a pear shaped body and my style varies between coquette, dark academy and baddie. I like to read, sleep and dance. My personality is a weird combination of Fluttershy, Sasha Blouse, and Twilight Sparkle. I'm good listener and I am willing to give my support or advice. Thank you ♡ The english is not my first language so sorry if there is any mistake.😖

Hi! I just saw this, and found it in my inbox on my laptop but not on mobile weird, anyways

I ship you with Brett!

I feel like he'd absolutely enjoy hanging out with you, dancing you around to songs, and having an absolute blast wherever y'all two go. He is the type to spin you around or twirl you into a dance no matter where you two are or if there even is music playing. Doing errands and in the middle of the snack aisle? Brett's waltzing and asking about future plans. Taking a walk downtown and hearing music in the distance? Tugging you along to free space to spin you around and see your smile grow wide. He thinks you're a delight and such a wonder, finding it so enthralling to hear you ramble about the latest book you've read or play with your hair while your head is seated in his lap, listening to you talk or talking to you until you fall asleep. Brett's favorite thing is how you get when you are sleepy, eyes lazy and lids lowered, a bit ditzy but still as warm and lovely.

He would love how caring you are and how whenever something is troubling him when he can't be strong anymore, he can come to you and you let him talk and release everything. He loves that it's not just him helping you out but it is a partnership, with you two helping each other and giving support and aid whenever needed or requested. You two are always each other's hand in need and the person to help them back up when each other falls. And he loves you for it.

#brett hand #inside job ship #asked and answered #my inside job #personal inside job #brett x you #brett hand selfship #inside job brett hand #inside job brett #Netflix brett hand #inside job

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cybernexus · 1 year

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I have to catch up on a bunch of things but here's a post straight off the shitpost express about magic in my cyberpunk fantasy world (and regarding Raj + his fam)

Not me thinking about the fact that Raj has hidden magical abilities, that lay dormant in his family for like, centuries!! For a very important reason I'll get to later...

And the fact that his particular type of energy being fiery and passionate representing not having an outlet for your emotions. He chooses to bottle his rage because he fears it, and doesn't know how to deal with it.

He's been ignoring it and pushing it down, and trying to forget it ever existed, but sooner or later it's all going to come to an explosive conclusion. Sometimes when he overworks himself in a fight you can see the energy pulsing in his chest.

Something else to consider is that I put an extreme amount of emphasis on the fact Raj was built with the overheat flaw, so that he would be easier to control. They knew that given his emotions he'd run hot naturally anyway, and that's why they chose this flaw - among a few others.

Raj's fiery elemental affinity isn't a mistake of nature either - it reflects his personality and is what he's drawn toward. For example, someone else might be drawn toward water or electricity, but you can choose what you want to practice if you're aware of it.

When Raj eventually unlocks the ability to use his powers, he's going to use them at first in a very utilitarian manner to vent the excess heat from his body in a direct way.

So for example if he's firing lasers from his palms, that's that much less heat his body is accumulating.

Because this whole time, it's not just his emotions that's causing him to overheat - it's also largely this very potent magical energy that wants to come out, which made the Forge's overheat flaw all too effective and they kinda gave themselves too much credit because 75% of the reason why he overheats is his untapped magic. This is because all the energy skipped a few generations and ended up in him (and his sister oops spoiler).

Typically magic is discovered around or shortly before puberty, but Raj is a late bloomer because that just Happens Sometimes + he's also a cyborg which can sometimes delay discovering magical talents.

To not make Raj too overpowered, me giving him magic is basically my answer to him not having any medium to long-ranged attacks and giving him a smidgen more mobility. Right now he can run fast, but ideally only in straight lines and short bursts. So with magic, this upgrade is like, just imagine some I/ron M/an-like energy beams out of his palms plus the ability to fly with his energy lol

#file | ooc #lore | Raj #// secret lore hour #// yeah yeah I realize show and not tell but sometimes you just gotta infodump

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queen-beefcake-sqx · 1 year

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Choose violence ask game for Disco Elysium - 2, 7, 19!

I THREW myself out of bed to come answer these at a computer so I didn't have to deal with mobile's bs and could focus more on being unhinged. And then I had to go lie down and go back to bed and finish typing this after work because I got light headed. SO YEAH. 2. a compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom Okay one a reminder to all our friends out there that topping or bottoming, to me, have less to do with position and giving/recieving and more to do with CONTROL, you know? So I hope you all are ready for the SPICIEST fucking take ever because Harry? Harrier Du Bois? Sobered up, he's a service top hands down. Think about it -- people always mistake service tops for bottoms, you know? Because all they want is to make sure you're taken care of. And then next thing you know they're telling you all the things you want to hear and you're coming like a teenager discovering sex again. And also like... being a bottom is actually kind of hard when your partner is super quiet and your head is going a million miles an hour and even the best dick can't get your brain to shut off like!!!!! Speaking from experience!!!! So full submissive bottoming is like an exercise in patience and not making himself cry when his voices are mean to him. So anyway just imagine Kim Kitsuragi, who has never bottomed a day in his goddamn life, suddenly realizing Harry has him wrapped around his (incredibly thick and handsome) finger and is can-opening him while they're fucking and just mentally completely loses all his composure over it. And Harry gets the railing of his life while putting his overactive brain to good use making sure Kim is satisfied. It's perfect, I'm right, send tweet. 7. what character did you begin to hate not because of canon but because how how the fandom acts about them?

Jean. I was honestly expecting him to be more irrationally bitter and angry when I finally ran into him and like... I need to finish out the game, but first impressions? I think the fandom steers Jean too vitriolic sometimes. He's angry and he's hurt and he's been abandoned but he also reminds me of the kids in my class who tell each other to fuck off lovingly when they're annoyed at each other because any kind of emotional vulnerability is too much for them. May revise this once I wrap up my first run though. 19. you're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like... Joyce. She's the right combination of terrible traits that'd draw me in and say, "She's the lesser evil." Regardless of how true it is.

#say more sadie #I have so many more to answer....

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yostresswritinggirl · 3 years

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@butterfly-mochi Rewrote this freaking thing thrice because it keeps getting deleted wth tumblr agjvahkfajkvk- I enjoyed writing it a lot tho and since I’m too weak to the characters I ended up writing for all of them (except for Sucrose, im sorry bb huhu, I ran out of brain power). This is my first time writing for so many of them in one go so please excuse me for any mistakes or blandness ywy thank you for letting me write for my baby Ganyu too hhhhh

Universe Reversal 2

Genshin Impact Character Reader and Modern Players with Zhongli, Childe & Ganyu (how they simp for you) (event masterlist / Part 1 / Part 3)

Zhongli the F2P

The most relatable out of the bunch because this man is still broke and can only rely on the primogems he can farm. And he had a LOT. The one thing he doesn’t have a lot on, however, is his luck.

So how did he manage to pull you?: Well after exhausting all his primogem on your banner with nothing but weapons and other characters, he has lost his resolve. But by some weird luck, there was a character bug that was fixed and in his email was the almighty consolation primogem. Enough for ONE pull. And by the Gods he FINALLY got you.

He’d nonchalantly post his screenshot of pulling you using a single acquaint fate in his friend group without any words and everyone else just loses their shit. “You got them in one pull?!” “Yeah” A riot.

This was partnered with the fact that not only is Zhongli an F2P player, but also barely has any five star characters.

He looks calm and apathetic over the news, but behind the screen he’s exhausted and relieved, silently livid.

He has no primogems left to squeeze for a constellation so you’re instead pampered with the best weapon suitable for you (because that’s all he keeps getting).

Zhongles spends most of his time farming for materials to quickly level you up, unlocking all your stories and voiceline, but he fucked up on your build (his artifacts are messy).

He follows communities, forums and videos regarding your character to know all the things he needs to perfect your build. You can barely make a dent against normal mobs, so he knew he was doing something VERY wrong.

Is the type of person to keep refreshing the page for new content, very updated.

Ask him a question about your character and he’s gonna bring you the word vomit that is his research. He’s not gonna stop- probably accidentally developed a copypasta for you.

Also follows your VA in both Tiktok and Twitter to indulge in every bit of content. He also has that screenshot of his pull saved and locked.

On his birthday, a friend of his gifted him a chibi plushie of you and he has treasured it ever since, treating and handling it like its a figurine.

“It is merely pure luck and grace from the gacha gods that I got this character, and I will make sure that they know I am very grateful for this fortune.”

Favorite Voiceline: Birthday Message

Childe The Whaler

This lucky wealthy bastard with no remorse for his money whales for EVERY character. He’s making a collection, which is to get all the characters, especially the five stars. So when your banner finally popped up, he’s gonna square up and trigger a whole ass meteor shower.

How he pulled you: Money. His luck with this games are actually not the best so he always compensates with money, he got you halfway through the first failed pity, almost giving him a heart attack that he might actually break the bank just to get you.

And then he pulls more to raise your constellation lol.

The first thing he does is look over your character info and read through it all; constellation infos, your base stats, artifact compatibility.

At the end when he’s maximized everything, he would then focus on playing around with your character *coughs climbing noises coughs*

He thought you’d just be another part of his collection but playing with your character was very enjoyable and in-line with his playstyle- oops 100 screenshots with the Kamera-

Any and all merchandise that he fancies would be his, and he’s definitely flexing it to the other sweetie nerds who call themselves simps. He’s fighting for the simping title, and he’s currently neck and neck with this fanartist in Pixiv.

Speaking of that fanartist, he definitely commissioned an expensive and detailed portrait of you, full rights and everything. No one else was allowed to use it but him.

Was also the first one with the audacity to call out your VA to create an account on Tiktok to create more content with your voice. He was successful.

His obssession also comes in the form of self-indulgent contents, and had been keeping track of the ship wars happening. During conventions, he cosplays as the character shipped with you the most (or the character he thinks should end up with you).

Silently scrutinizing those who cosplay you, only ever taking pictures with/of the best looking one, sorry haha

Definitely flaunts that you are his waifu/husbando and will fight for best girl/best boy during debates or polls. Has mobilized the community to vote for you once. He’s very persuasive.

“Hm? Why I’m just the best collector in the game, and I am more than happy to let everyone know that I am their number one fan haha, everyone who claims otherwise is definitely wrong!”

Favorite Voiceline: More About (Y/N) I-IV, (Y/N)’s Hobbies...

Ganyu the Employed

Ganyu, our dearest overworker, is one of the players in the older stage who actually has a job but still plays Genshin for their past times. The gorgeous sceneries and the music is her main focus in playing the game, not much of a try-hard but still decent in the combat mechanics.

How she pulled you: You came home within 50 pulls! And you appeared again after another 10 pull! Ganyu was so SHOOKT and so distressed because oh goodness, what does she do? She doesn’t know anything much about you!

Will rewatch your three trailers to try and understand your skills better, ended up saving the soundtracks from them because that was such a nice trailer music! Tnbee gains a new follower!

Ganyu will take a while before she can properly play or build you up because she’s so busy with work, she only ever plays when she feels fully done with her work.

During her break she plays with your character while multi-tasking on eating, earphones plugged in and sight on the phone as she farms materials and artifacts for you.

The moment she gets more help from her player friends tho, holy shit, you just ended up being so OP. She had so many good artifacts and weapons for you because she didn’t know what they were for before.

She loves how you’re so easy to use and can easily solo the enemies and even the boss fights. A huge breather, because now Ganyu can cheese the battles that takes a while, to give her more time to focus on the storyline and lores.

Since Ganyu plays for the story and aesthetic, she’ll find you almost always in her team. Still very proud of her pull, she makes the best screenshots of your fights or in the best angle through exploration.

Treasures you so much she starts talking to her phone- “Ah, no, please don’t fall.” “There’s violetgrass up there, let’s try and get it”

Blushes everytime you produce a sound when climbing, doesn’t change you anyways tho

Hums to your trailer music while working, and if permitted, would have the song on repeat while she buries herself in work. She finds it really refreshing and the time she spends in work miraculously flies by fast when she gets lost in the sound.

At one point, when she was given a day-off or if the convention was on her free time, she attends to look for cosplayers of you and take a picture. No one rejects her because she’s so adorable and cute when asking shyly.

Had brought a decent amount of merchandise, preferably the functional/practical ones like a phone cover, mug or keychain. Also has an earphones clamp with your little chibi self as the holder.

When asked, she would shyly announce that she likes your character the most.

“Their character theme and music really soothes me during work, it feels nice to have them, and I have not once regretted ever pulling for them. They are the best.”

Favorite Voicelines: Good Night/Afternoon..., About Us, Something To Share..., Interesting Things...

so enjoyable...

@moaa @zelos-simp @legionqueensav @dandelion-dreams @snackgod @rxsalinee

#genshin impact x reader #genshin impact #zhongli x reader #childe x reader #ganyu x reader #genshin impact zhongli #genshin impact childe #genshin impact ganyu #exile.circlet #exile.flower #sojourner specials #reeeeeeeeee #gender neutral

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queenshelby · 3 years

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The Last Semester – Part 21

Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader

Words: 1,856

Warning: Pregnancy, Angst

A week had passed since Cillian found out about the pregnancy and he had been nothing but gentle, helpful and responsive since. Every day, he asked you how you were feeling. He brought you prenatal vitamins and constantly reminded you to drink enough water. He even risked a black eye on several occasions when running into your father who was struggling with the situation and has refused to speak to Cillian again. He was furious and blamed him for everything, thinking that he should have been the responsible adult.

You weren’t sure whether Cillian did all this simply for the fact that you were pregnant or whether he wanted to get back together with you and, whilst you hoped that the latter was true, you wouldn’t make it so easy for him this time around. He had to fight for you if you were what he wanted.

You loved him, but part of the trust you had built throughout your relationship had faded after he pulled away from you for the second time when he faced what you thought were just a few small hurdles. What you didn’t know was that, in fact, the hurdles he was facing, weren’t so small at all. He was deeply conflicted and being with you could cost him much more than his friendship with your father. It could also cost him his career and this was something he began to slowly realise.

***

It was a Sunday afternoon and Cillian was waiting for Nadine, his ex-wife, to pick up the boys from his home.

As usual, she was late and his sons were getting frustrated having to wait around for her once again.

‘This sucks dad’ Charlie growled, causing Cillian to calm him down whilst, deep down inside, he hoped that Nadine would arrive soon as he had invited you over for dinner that evening and, the last thing he wanted, was having you and Nadine in the same room together

Until recently, Nadine had again broken court orders, withholding contact to the boys on several occasions. If it wasn’t for the fact that Charlie had his own mobile phone, Cillian wouldn’t have been able to communicate with them at all for weeks.

It was like a game to her. Whenever Cillian was even remotely happy with someone else, she would come out to play and he soon regretted having given her another chance earlier that year before he took the teaching position in London.

When she found out about you, all hell broke loose. She felt humiliated and embarrassed especially knowing that her attempts to get him back were futile.

And the worst of it all was that she knew about you for a very long time, using you as leverage against Cillian until he finally gave up and let you go.

It was that night, when he called you, breaking up with you when he found out that you were his friend’s daughter, that he slipped. He slipped with Nadine because she was there to pick up the pieces when he was at his worst.

Whilst this little hiccup didn’t result in anything more than a few kisses, it was a mistake and he knew that it was a mistake. The worst of it all was that it gave Nadine hope in a situation where there was none. After all, he loved you and not her.

Of course, Nadine was willing and able to use this against Cillian. She had already threatened him on many occasions to make public the many façades of their marriage and how he chose a young girl over the mother of his children.

This was exactly what his agent was worried about. He knew Nadine for many years and he knew about the skeletons in Cillian’s closet and, whilst there weren’t many, they could become quite scandalous.

Being with you and loving you was too difficult. It was an against all the odds type of situation. A twenty-year age gap was hardly going to be successful. Was he going to risk everything to simply give it a try?

***

Finally, at 6 o’clock, Nadine’s car pulled up in Cillian’s driveway and she quickly jumped out of her seat and ran towards the front door.

‘I am sorry I am late. I got caught up with a friend’ she said in a haste.

‘You could have called’ Cillian then said before allowing her inside.

‘Why, do you have a date?’ she then chuckled, causing Cillian to sigh and call out for the boys.

Just as they emerged from their bedrooms, you also pulled up in the driveway and Cillian immediately knew that this would be problematic.

You noticed Nadine’s car but walked towards the front door of the house anyway and Cillian was quick to let you in after giving you a polite kiss on your cheek.

‘Hey’ you said, greeting Nadine who didn’t bother to say anything to you but, instead, roll her eyes.

‘What is she doing here?’ Nadine then asked Cillian, ignoring your presence.

‘I invited her. Why?’ Cillian asked somewhat annoyed and Nadine immediately huffed in disapproval.

‘I don’t want her to spend time with my children. It sends the wrong message to them’ Nadine explained.

‘And what message may that be Nadine?’ Cillian asked rather irritated before Nadine escalated the situation and, once again, insulted you.

‘You think it’s a good idea to show the boys that this is ok? Being with someone that much younger who clearly isn’t compatible in any sort of way?’ Nadine then said before Cillian told the boys to wait in the car as he didn’t want them to hear the conversation between him and their mother.

‘Can you not do this in front of the children?’ Cillian asked angrily after the boys left with their Gameboys.

‘Do what? You are the one who is fucking a uni student, not me’ she then shouted and it soon became too much for you to listen to.

‘Hey, listen, I am going to go. This is awkward and I don’t want to be in the way, really’ you then said, feeling uncomfortable.

‘Wait on Sweetie. I am not finished’ Nadine said and you turned around at the door, rolling your eyes at her as you did.

‘Did he tell you that, when he visited Dublin a few months ago, he spent time with me? Just the two of us?’ Nadine then asked before telling you how she was very well aware of Cillian’s needs and that you were likely too young and inexperienced for him and he would have realised this by now.

‘Nadine, that’s enough!’ Cillian growled, interrupting Nadine as she went on.

‘I am going’ you then huffed out, irritated and upset. She was taking it too far and you didn’t need this in your life.

‘Y/N, hold on’ Cillian said, trying to hold you back but you shook your head and left. You didn’t want to deal with this.

‘Just remember what I have against you Cillian. Surely, if this becomes public, Y/N might get some ideas. Poor thing, so young and innocent. Also, the boys are staying with me for the next two weeks’ Nadine chuckled somewhat amused.

‘Fuck this, Nadine. I have had enough of this crap. Fucking do it, eh! Send it to the fucking paper just as you have threatened for years. I no longer give a shit and in so far as the boys are concerned, I will be in contact with my lawyer tomorrow. A fit and proper person doesn’t use their children as leverage. Fucking wake up, would you’ Cillian growled before storming outside with the boys’ backpacks and putting them into Nadine’s car before giving each of them a hug and saying goodbye to them.

‘Love you guys, see you on Wednesday’ he said with a warm smile before getting into his own car with the view to drive after you to apologise about Nadine’s behaviour and having you get caught up in this.

***

As expected, just before Cillian arrived at your house, he received a call from his agent Brian who was clearly upset and annoyed.

‘We have a problem Cillian’ he said with an almost terrified voice.

‘I know. Her name is Nadine’ Cillian chuckled.

‘I have seen it. Just then. She sent it to me via email’ Brian said concerned.

‘Did you enjoy it?’ Cillian laughed.

‘You need to take this seriously Cillian. Nadine also told me that you are back with the girl’ Brian then said.

‘She held this against me for fucking years and I played along for the boys’ sake, but I can’t keep going like this’ Cillian then explained, causing Brian to sigh.

‘This and the fact that you are with a 20 fucking something year old who also happens to be your friend’s daughter is a fucking disaster mate. You need to break it off’ Brian argued.

‘She is pregnant’ Cillian then said, knowing that this would annoy Brian even more.

‘You are fucking kidding me. Fuck mate. For your career’s sake you need end it with this girl quietly, pay her, get her to sign an NDA’ Brian explained.

‘No Brian, I won’t be doing any of these things. Let me tell you something. I married Nadine because she was pregnant with Charlie. I never loved her. I simply did what others told me was the right fucking thing to do. This is probably why our relationship was so messed up. I was about to do this again, listening to what others tell me is right or wrong and what is good for me. Listening to you, to Nadine, John and my mother. But, luckily, this time, I just came to my fucking senses’ Cillian said just before he pulled up in front of your apartment building.

‘She is twenty years younger than you, what do you think will happen in twenty years? Will she still be around? Will she be worth all this?’ Brian then asked somewhat upset.

‘I don’t know, but I am keen to find out’ Cillian said as turned off the car.

‘This could be career suicide Cillian’ Brian said.

‘Perhaps. So, I suggest that you work hard for your commission while you still can and use these connections of yours to make publication of what Nadine has sent you hurt as little as possible’ Cillian chuckled.

‘It’s a sex tape Cillian. What the fuck do you want me to do about it? Censor it?’ Brian asked.

‘If you do, keep the good parts, eh? I need to go’ Cillian said.

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jawabear · 3 years

Text

1 of 10 (Bucky Barnes x Reader)

Not my GIF (look at this man...)

A/N: so here’s that Bucky fic I’ve been talking about. This took me too long to write but I like it? I’m absolutely loving Falcon and The Winter Soldier! I’ve mentioned this before but Bucky Barnes is my all time favourite fictional character. This is set before the events of episode one but maybe like a week or so before. I hope you enjoy. Sorry for any mistakes. Stay safe.

Genre: fluff, angst

Warnings: fem!reader, tfatws spoilers, Bucky being awkward, nightmares, therapy, Bucky isn’t as smooth as he was in the 40s but he’s still cute

Summary: Bucky has ten contacts in his phone. One of which belongs the the girl he feels he has been searching for for 106 long years.

The times in which he found himself now were more than confusing. But that was the best way Bucky could think to describe them. For him though it seemed a lot worse than for others. For others, they had a gap of five years missing. For Bucky, he had far more than that.

From 1943 to 2023 there was a lot missing. He remembered it however. He remembered everything. The good, the bad, and the horrifying. What was meant by missing was that it wasn’t him who was living. He had missed out on living between those years. He had missed out on everything. And he knew, like the billions of others, he would never get those years back.

But now he was a civilian. Working to make amends from his past after being given a pardon. However, settling into his new easy life was proving far from that. It had been a few months now since the whole ordeal with saving the blipped half of humanity, Bucky included, and it had been a few months now since Steve went back in time and started a new life leaving him and Sam behind.

Sam. Right.

Sam was an avenger. More so than Bucky could ever be. So he was off doing his avenging work while Steve’s shield gathered dust in a wardrobe somewhere he was sure. Sam didn’t have it in him to take up the mantle of Captain America. He felt the shield belonged to someone else. It was Steve’s. It only ever could be.

More often than perhaps Bucky would like, he would get texts from Sam. Asking him how he was and telling him about missions he was going on. Bucky never replied. He didn’t know how to half the time and he didn’t want to.

He didn’t know how he was. He didn’t know if he was okay. He was forced to go see a therapist but all he did was lie to her.

“Have you had any nightmares recently?” She would ask him.

Bucky would think back to the night before their meeting and all the others as well. Each night he’d have to be faced with the horrors of his past. Every mission he carried out. Every person he carelessly killed.

“No” he would answer. And it wasn’t like he was wrong in his answer. The things he saw in his sleep were not nightmares they were memories. The nightmarish horrors he was were his reality, so when he said no in response to her question, he found it difficult to be accused of lying.

There were few things he could agree with her about. But the one thing he could see eye to eye with her about was the fact he was alone.

Sure, he had Sam. But only when Bucky wanted to acknowledge him which had not been often as of recently. And as his therapist so kindly pointed out he only had ten contacts on his phone. But in his defence, he still wasn’t used to the whole world of mobile communications and internet. So his phone was basically redundant to him. His mind was still in the 1940s where you’d find a date, what would now be classed as, the old fashioned way. By looking in person and talking. Not just texting or swiping left or right on an app.

Granted, Bucky did try his hand in online dating but it was far too much for him. It wasn’t only hard for him to figure out but also he saw too much of people he didn’t even know. The openness of the internet was something that was mind boggling to him. So that was thrown out of the window pretty quickly.

But what his therapist had failed to note was one name in his contacts. The name of his neighbour and quite possibly the one he wanted to end his loneliness with.

Back in his time, when he didn’t just have the looks of someone in their 20s, Bucky was in fact quite popular and good with the ladies. But the ladies, he found, of this new age were completely different to the ones of his time. Not that there was a problem, he just knew that he couldn’t used the same moves now as what he could back then.

He met (Y/N), his neighbour, as he was first moving in. After coming back, loosing Steve and getting a pardon, Bucky thought it be best to try and start a new. He did that by moving back to his old home of Brooklyn. His old apartment was obviously gone and with little money to his name he couldn’t afford the one that replaced it. It was far to big for him anyway. But he managed to find a smaller more affordable one and he much preferred it. If not only for the quieter location then the others in the building too.

(Y/N) was the first person he spoke too when back in Brooklyn. She was sweet and kind when introducing herself. She offered to help him move in but he really didn’t have that much stuff to use in making his new apartment more homely. And he had no food either. So (Y/N) did the neighbourly thing and invited him in for some food. A meal of sorts although she didn’t have much food either at the time. Even so, it was nice for him to be in company for once. And it was such warm company. They didn’t speak about much but he learnt a few things about her.

And now, on most Thursday evenings, he’ll find himself with her in her apartment eating a meal, sometimes she’ll cook, sometimes they’ll order take out, but he enjoys it regardless.

It was clear from the offset that she knew who he was. He frantically explained to her that he wasn’t what he used to be anymore and explained the terms of his pardon and how he’s making amends. But he needn’t have waste his breath on it. She didn’t seem to care about it. About who he used to be. She told him that she doesn’t live in peoples pasts and that she wanted to get to know him for who he is, not who he was. Those words meant a great deal to him. And from that moment on he had fallen for her.

Bucky sighed as he dragged himself up the stairs to his floor. He desperately wished there was some way of getting out of these therapy sessions. But he was tied to them. He couldn’t stop going to them even though he wanted too. But there, it wasn’t really like he had anything better to do. Nothing but either sitting at home in silence or walking around busy streets constantly looking over his shoulder. Those were his only other options.

As he walked to his apparent at the end of the hallway (Y/N)’s door opened and she walked out dressed for the outdoors, it was getting cold so it was smart of her to be wearing a warm coat. “(Y/N)” he called gently to her. She lifted her head after locking her door and gave him a warm smile.

“Hi James” She said, she always called him James rather than Bucky. He didn’t know why but he didn’t exactly mind. “How was your session today?” She had memorised the times at which he went to his therapy sessions. She probably knew he schedule better than he did.

Bucky shrugged “the usual” he told her making her laugh a little.

“That bad huh?”

“I guess” he said scratching the back of his neck.

“Well, I’m heading to the store to get some food if you wanted to talk on the way? Don’t feel you have to”

“No, that sounds good” he tried to smile but it was a little awkward, but she didn’t seem to say anything and just motioned her head for him to follow.

The shop wasn’t too far away so it was a quick walk. Bucky wasn’t the talkative type, not really anyway. Especially not to someone he didn’t like. And Dr Raynor was someone who he didn’t like. He was sure that deep down she was a lovely person but he didn’t like the fact she was insistent in getting him to admit his feelings. Although that was her job.

It wasn’t long until they arrived at the store “so what happened?” (Y/N) asked as she picked up a basket.

“Just the usual...she asked me if I had a nightmare-“

“Did you?” Bucky didn’t answer and just looked away from her. “James, you know that it’s her job to help you. And it’s in your best interest to let her”

“I know...but at the same time...I don’t see the point. These things are mandatory. So if I don’t want to go then I don’t see it being helpful”

“I can understand that” her eyes flicking between two boxes of cereal as she inwardly decried in which one to get, but her indecisive nature got the better of her so she opted to get both. Her indecisiveness, Bucky thought, was incredibly cute. It linked in with her kindness, on their Thursday evening meals together it takes ages just to decide what to have. “But still,” she continued, Bucky following her like a lost puppy “like you said, it’s mandatory. And there are people who would love to be in your position. Getting therapy I mean. So you should at least make the most of it while you can”

“I mean...yeah. I guess. But...I don’t know I just...well it’s easier to talk to someone like you then it is to talk to her” (Y/N) smiled at little at this as she finished putting on the last few items before making her way to the till.

Neither of them said much else. Expect for (Y/N) making light conversation with the cashier as she paid although both (Y/N) and Bucky knew that the cashier really didn’t want to be there. Luckily it didn’t take long for (Y/N) to bag her items and pay for them before they were both leaving the store.

It had gotten colder outside then when they left originally. (Y/N) shivered and pulled her coat around her a little more before they both began walking back to their apartment building.

“So what is it about me that makes you find it easier to talk?” She asked, she brushed her hair from her face as a sudden gust of wind blew it out of place when she turned to look at him.

“Well...” he muttered shoving his hands into his pockets “for one, you don’t sit there with a passive aggressive notebook ready to write shit about me” this made her laugh a little, she always found it funny when he’d talk about this notebook Dr Raynor had. She didn’t really know why he hated it so much, and she knew she shouldn’t have found it funny but he never stopped her from laughing about it, in fact often times he would join in thereby encouraging her.

“Yes, that is something better I guess. Although, I’m sure I could find a notebook if you wanted” she teased.

“Oh god. Please don’t” He said holding back a smile.

“Anything else?” She asked him.

Bucky thought for a moment. There were many things about her that made it easier for him to talk to her, but he couldn’t list them all. For one, that would be embarrassing, and two he didn’t think he’d have the breath to do it. “Well-“

He was cut off when he saw (Y/N)’s smile fall and her pace began to slow right down to a stop. Bucky stopped and looked at her “everything okay?” He asked her, his voice full of concern.

She turned sharply to the side so she was facing the road “y-yeah..” she stuttered nervously “just...my ex is walking this way and I really don’t want him to see me”

Bucky felt a strange feeling inside him. He didn’t even know she had been in a relationship. It must’ve been a recent thing right? Unless it was a really bad break up in the past, or this guy had done something to her to prompt her being so on edge. Bucky turned to try and scope out this guy but he didn’t have a clue what he was looking for. So he reached over to her and pulled up her hood on her hoodie that she wore under her coat and pulled her into his side so that her face was hidden from view.

“Tell me when he’s gone” Bucky muttered to her. She nodded her head and let him walk her along the path, she kept her eye on the path ahead as best she could while still covering her face. But she was now more focused on two things, his arm around her and his wonderful smell. Never did she think she’d ever get this close to him. She never thought he’d let her, but here she was attached to his side with his arm wrapped around her, holding her protectively against him.

And his smell. It was just as comforting as she dreamed it would be. A mix of his cologne and what she could only describe as Him. All she wanted to do now was to just melt into his strong and warm embrace and just stay there forever.

In all her daydreaming she didn’t notice that her ex had long since walked by and they had reached the entrance to their apartment building and she didn’t tell him he could let go or that it was safe for her to walk properly.

Bucky came to a stop and slowly slipped his arm from her “I mean...I take it he’s gone now right?” He said a little nervously. (Y/N) stood up straight and pushed the hood from her head and nodded quickly, her cheeks burning in embarrassment.

“Yeah. Yes, right. Sorry. Yes. He’s gone. I um...I just wanted to make sure he didn’t suddenly turn around you know? That’s all” she said in an unconvincing tone. But Bucky himself was too flustered to actually care that she was flustered as well.

“Of course, that’s smart. Well we made it back” he said stepping up to the door and pushing it open for her. She nodded and thank you and quickly hopped inside the building, Bucky following after her.

The walk up the stairs was an awkward silence. They felt like teenagers after their first ever date. Who says something first? What do they even say? Luckily for them, this wasn’t a first date, and they weren’t teenagers. They were fully grown, mature adults. But that doesn’t mean adults can’t get flustered in the presence of their crush...right?

After what felt like hours, but was more like five painstaking minuets, they finally got to their floor and walked down the hall, both briefly forgetting that they lived right next to each other.

(Y/N) stopped at her door and placed her bag of food on the floor to fish out her keys from her pocket. “Uh...you want to come in?” She asked whilst fiddling around in her pocket to find the keys. “I know it’s not Thursday but we didn’t really talk as much as usual...” her voice seemed to trail off as she finally found her keys and put them in the key hole before unlocking the door. “You don’t have too..”

“I’d...like to...” he said in a soft voice with a gentle smile to try and put her at ease even though he too was freaking out inside. She smiled back and picked up her bag before walking inside her apartment, he did too.

They both made their way into her small kitchen and he made himself at home by sitting in his usual seat at her white kitchen table and she began to unpack the shopping “Do you want me to help?” He asked her as he went to stand up but she waved off his offer.

“No no, it’s fine. There’s only a few bits anyway” she told him as she began to pack each item away in its rightful place.

“So uh...” Bucky began quietly as he scraped his metal finger again the wood table. “This ex of yours...what’s the story there?”

Bucky was a little cautious of his words. He didn’t want to say anything to hurt or offend her but at the same time he wanted to know what about the guy made her so on edge earlier.

“Oh uh...” she muttered as she pulled two cups from her cupboard.

“You don’t need to tell me if you want want to. Sorry..”

“It’s fine” she assured him “nothing really happened I guess. It was just a bad break up. He didn’t really take it well and for a few weeks after that he just kept texting me and trying to call me. He came round to my place too to try and get me back. He never did know how to take no for an answer. But about a month ago he finally got the message and stopped all contact with me. Seeing him today...I was just worried that he’d try it all again”

“He sounds like a real asshole” Bucky said flatly making her laugh a little as she went about making some tea for the both of them. “But in his defence, if I lost a girl like you, I’d struggle with taking no for an answer as well”

(Y/N) let out a nervous laugh and almost dropped his tea cup from the shock of his comment but she was a little more used to his flirtatious nature that would sometimes make an appearance when they were in her apartment. After he told her about his boyish charms back in the 40s she noticed how he would often slip back into that era. It was cute to say the least.

She set down his tea in front of him and he flashed her a “thank you” smile before wrapping his fingers around it.

There was a brief silence in the room. She was greatly over thinking is earlier comment. But so was he. Maybe he shouldn’t have said it. He meant it though. But what if he had pushed the limit a little too far?

“What was the other reason?” She asked him, her finger nail scratching again the tea cup trying to avoid eye contact with him at all costs.

“Huh?” He questioned looking over the table to her.

“Earlier. You were going to give me another reason why I’m easier to talk to. What was it?”

Bucky’s muscles tensed as his fingers gripped the tea cup handle as he stared into the black tea she had made for him. “If I’m being honest...” he began slowly “I think...there are too many reasons why I find talking to you easier. But I guess one is that you don’t do it because you have to or it’s your job to. You do it out of kindness. And it’s...easier to talk to someone who’s listening because they want to. And yes, I get that Dr Raynor probably does want to help me but I also know that at the end of the day, it’s all for a pay check. But with you...you do it because you want to. Or at least...I think you want to”

“I do want to, James. I’ll always be around to ask if you’re okay. And to make you okay when you’re not. I care about you...”

“And...I care about you. Another reason I prefer talking to you is because...I like you...a lot. I just think you’re the most beautiful woman, and you have such a sweet and caring nature and a good heart that is wasted on me. But I can’t help but like you...” he couldn’t really believe he just said what he did. He wasn’t mean to tell her that. It was meant to stay a secret within him into the end of time. But there was a shift in atmosphere that just made it all slip out.

“You...you like me?” She asked, still not looking at him.

“Yeah...” he said. There was a little more confidence in his voice as he admitted his feelings towards her.

“I like you too..” she too held a little more confidence in her voice as she admitted her returned feelings. It felt...good. Especially since she knew he returned the feelings she had harboured for him since they met.

She stood abruptly and held her hand out to him. He looked at it and looked up at her again before taking her hand. She pulled him to his feet and a little close to her.

He smirked a little as he looked down at her “you want me to kiss you or something?” He said almost proudly.

“Yes..” she said “but first...I want to know something”

“What do you want to know?” He asked her. She squeezed his hand and dragged him out of her kitchen.

She lead him to her bedroom and noticed the worried expression on his face when he looked at her bed. This was what she wanted to know.

“You don’t have a bed in your apartment...” She told him quietly. (Y/N) turned her body so she was facing him completely, he cautiously lifted his hands to settle on her waist.

“I know...” he mumbled.

“Why?”

Bucky paused but he felt safe enough to give her an honest answer “I...I’m...scared. Of them”

“What is it about a bed that scares you?” She whispered, her fingers gently trailing down his cheeks. Bucky didn’t answer right away, for one he was to busy focusing of the beautiful touch of her hands, and for another, he didn’t really know the answer to her question. But he could take a guess.

“Because I...I don’t think I’ve slept in one since 1943. And I...after everything I’ve done...I don’t deserve to lie in such luxury...” his voice was quiet and barely audible, had it not been for the close proximity they were in, she probably wouldn’t have heard him.

“James...” she laid her forehead against his and he instinctively griped her waist a little tighter. The comfort and warmth she was bringing him was something he didn’t want to loose. She was someone he didn’t want to loose. He felt safer with no one but her. For once he actually felt...okay. But he felt he was holding her too tightly, but if he was she was wasn’t willing to tell him that.

“You know that you have no reason to be afraid. You are changing. You are becoming a good man. You do deserve to live in luxury, even if that starts with sleeping in a proper bed. Maybe it is scary for you...but...if you’ll allow me, I’ll help you face it”

“Please...” he whispered with a nod before pressing his lips to hers.

05/04/21

Taglist: @lunaserenade @phoenixhalliwell @slytherin4ever

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #Bucky Barnes fanfic #Sebastian Stan #tfatws #marvel #fluff #angst #fanfic

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utilitycaster · 2 years

Note

I was hoping for your advice on a character build bc you always have such good mechanic points. I want to do a hexblade/swashbuckler with a double bladed scimitar and the revenant blade feat (which makes the double bladed scimitar finesse, and I can summon any weapon w Pact of Blade/Hexblade)

The problem is that to do rogue things, I still need to have a good dex, so the hexblade split sort of loses the major appeal. Would a paladin dip/split be better, due to the same proficiencies, the Blessed Warrior fighting style for cantrips, healing, and extra attack if I go far enough? I thought about doing all three, with a 2 level dip for paladin, at least 5 in warlock for the invocations Extra Attack and Improved Pact Weapon, and then starting 3 Swashbuckler for skills, but that's a little...hmm. I am starting at level 6, which helps with the delay in coming online.

I know it's all over the place, but I'd like to be able to hold my own (med armor + rakish audacity + healing/ranged spells) be mobile (bonus action dash + fancy footwork) and have out of combat utility (the amount of skills from starting rogue + expertise and either warlock or paladin spells)

I think you are wanting too many things, and I recommend deciding which ones you want less. Which is not a choice I can make for you, so I can't give you any build specifics, but I'd look hard at the list of things you are trying to achieve and edit it ruthlessly.

I think some people do mistake utility for being able to do absolutely everything, and that's in the end not the case; I think they also expect it at low levels, and that's also not the case. Wizards are one of the highest utility classes, for example, but they usually don't have much in the way of physical protection/damage and they can't heal. But that's fine, because presumably there are other people in the party. Utility is about being able to fill various roles, but it's not about being able to fill all roles. Now, some characters do end up able to fill nearly all roles, but usually that's at like, level 13+, so worrying about that at L6 is not helpful.

Part of why I don't like rogues, actually, is that they get a reputation for utility that wizards don't despite being equally if not more limited: they get access to more skills, but from a very limited range; they get expertise; and then they can (usually) do like one type of damage which is only significant under specific circumstances and their HP isn't very good and they can't heal. I don't want to knock skill proficiencies - I play bards a lot, after all - but utility means a lot of things and rogues represent a rather tiny segment of those things and, crucially, unlike most of the other utility classes, can only really reperesent that tiny segment.

Anyway: if you want the extra skills? Human with the prodigy/skilled/skill expert feat, or half-elf. Is the main reason for using up a feat on revenant blade to have the double-edged scimitar specifically? If so then if that's a vital part of your aesthetic, fine, but like...longswords do more damage and you can just like, do that and take the mobile feat. I don't see the point in trying to get a couple d6 of sneak attack if you're going to have L3 divine smites. Basically: hexadin with a smart feat/invocation build is going to be better at literally anything except stealth and lockpicking than a multiclass of hexblade or paladin with swashbuckler, and if you really want you can take a criminal background to gain those proficiencies too.

And if you really are dead set on swashbuckler but with healing spells? I'd mix that with swords or valor bard instead of hexblade or paladin and use a rapier, or in this case you've got a zillion skills/expertises anyway and can actually take the scimitar feat comfortably. It's a primarily charisma/dex build anyway since bards still need to use their physical stats to attack, and you get medium armor and shield proficiency from the bard subclass at L3 and the extra attack at L6.

#d&d mechanics

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writingwithcolor · 4 years

Text

Indian-Scottish character practicing Hinduism from boarding school

@viola-cola said:

I have a half-Indian, half-Scottish character named Niraj Ajit Sonar (Ajit being his father's name) born in Scotland. His father is Marathi and immigrated to Scotland, while his mother is white. I'm mostly confident this name makes sense, but thought I should check anyway. My primary concern with this character is showing that he is a practicing Hindu when the story takes place in a boarding school. Beyond him going home for certain important holidays, how might he practice on a daily basis?

The Obvious:

If he’s had a thread ceremony, you could show that he wears it under his clothes at all times. Many Hindu boys tend to have a thread ceremony performed before they are 16.

He might be used to taking his shoes off in his dorm room, as many diaspora South Asians do at home (The American/ British habit of wearing shoes at home still puzzles me to this day, given their preference for carpeting).

The Less Obvious:

Whether or not he chooses to be vegetarian depends on his personal convictions, his family and also his assimilation within the UK, but as a Brahmin who openly consumes and prepares beef, even I have a certain level of guilt about consuming beef, so that’s another cue that communal dining in boarding schools might offer. I can imagine lots of family tension around meals at home where the father has issues with beef that the mother’s family just doesn’t understand (This is heavily pulled from my own life). I’ve made the mistake of almost eating beef in front my Hindu relatives when they come to visit and oof.

Sonar/ Sunar is a goldsmithing last name, so it might be fun to have relatives back in India sending him jewelry (like gold chains) or metal statues of Ganesha or Saraswati (For luck and studies) that he debates over bringing to school. It’s very typical for South Asian relatives who can afford it to send gold jewelry to favored children as gold is perceived as protective in many South Asian cultures. More practically, gold is a highly liquid asset in India. Explaining to my family that I couldn’t possibly wear the elaborate jewelry they sent me in a Western environment or the risks of displaying a sterling silver statue of Ganesha in my dorm room was a particular struggle growing up, but in this case, it could serve as a subtle nod to his caste background as well. In my case, I abandoned the silver Ganesha statue, but I did keep a prayer altar in my room that I offered incense to on a regular basis. Thankfully, my roommates had no issue, but California is also very strict about the protection of religious expression.

Coding Hinduism in British Environments

I think the best way to code his Hinduism is frankly to explore the tensions that the climate of traditional Briish boarding schools/ Oxford/ Cambridge type can provoke for people from former colonies. This struggle strikes me as largely consistent with his Scottish/ Gaelic roots, particularly if he grew up speaking any form of Scots. For all the social mobility opportunities they offer, British boarding schools present real challenges to a person engaged with their non-British heritage. He’ll hear a lot of views on colonialism and his father’s culture (arranged marriages, dietary restrictions, stereotypes, pro-British sentiment, etc.) that directly conflict with his parents’ relatives' stances in borderline offensive ways (Particularly for the Indian side). Even geography lessons could be a potential trigger. Starting from when I was a kid, states like Maharashtra started replacing the British names for regions and cities with their pre-British names (Did anyone wonder why Bombay, Madras and Calcutta became Mumbai, Chennai and Kolkata overnight?).

I recommend talking to people of mixed desi heritage living in the UK about their experiences with British racism and xenophobia. Tiktok has a lot of great “POC at Hogwarts” clips that skewer British parochialism with great flair.

- Marika.

He might practice by praying to an idol he brought with him, or wear an elephant necklace. It doesn’t have to be an expensive metal, for the reasons that Marika mentioned. That’s what my dad would do. Mom says he would get up at five AM every day and pray while working as an oncologist.

- Jaya

#racism #xenophobia #diaspora #boarding schools #Hinduism #colonialism #asks #Indian #Scottish #Mixed race #Hindu

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hwrryscherry · 3 years

Text

The one where the reader meets Harry as Jack

characters: HARRYxREADER!FEM

blurb: Harry is filming Don't Worry Darling in Palms Springs while Y/N is moving in in her new house in the neighbourhood where the movie is being filmed. Turns out the fate wanted to cross Harry and Y/N's way as a box full of books is very intriguing to Harry and Pride and Prejudice becomes Harry's new favorite.

word count: 2.7K

author's note: Heyy guys, it has been SO LONG and honestly I don’t think this is best work yet lol but anyway, I had the worst writer’s block of my life so it was so hard for me to write a single word. Honestly, I felt kinda pressured to write. I felt like I was pressuring myself for that so I had to take advantage of this block and take this idea out of my mind. I want to say something important too; I really want to say that the only story of mine that I’ll keep the face claim is HARRYxMODELY/N, just because I like to use the photos to make instagram posts sometimes. I will no longer describe types of hair as I used to say ‘’long strands of hair’’, it will be neutral for you to imagine yourself in the story. It’s all about you guys and how you can visualize the story and the character, if you want to imagine a face claim that’s cool but if you don’t want to it’s cool too. Feel free to read and visualize, it’s all about you. Thank you for the support on my account and my writing. I’m aware that I’m not the best lol, but I also think that I have so much to learn from you just as I have to teach. I’m so grateful for everyone who reads and like my stuff. Never forget that you’re unique, you’re loved, you’re so golden and treat people with kindness always.

"Why is it so hot in here? It's fucking December!", you'd think to yourself as you drove your new car through the streets of Palm Springs. The thing is that after you moved from Columbia to reside so many years in New York while you were studying English Language and Literature in Yale, you just got so used with the usual colder weather from NY and it's just a different vibe from California. You had such a hard time to decide what you wanted to do after graduating, though. And after a few weeks and some long conversations with your family, you decided you would go to California. Palm Springs, to be more specific. You decided that because you remembered all the times you went there when you were a kid because your grandmother lived in there before she passed. You remember spending your summer vacation with her and how cool it was. It was in the early 2000′s and there was many kids on your age that lived on her street. You remember playing with them all day and then getting back into your grandma’s house and feeling that cinnamon scent that for some one only her house had. It wasn’t a usual cinnamon scent. It had something special in it. It made you feel so warm and welcomed. You remember helping her to bake the most delicious cookies, brownies and cakes in her kitchen. You remember the kitchen had a yellow counter, but the entire kitchen was white. All very pale and then the cheerful yellow in the kitchen that colored everything. You remember going to play bingo with her and how it made her happy to having you around. You both were so close and you had such a hard time when she passed, but the most important was she taught you so many things during your time together, and you’d never forget those things and her.

As you drove, you’d remember those streets vaguely. You’d pass through the soccer court you typically used to go with the other kids and spent hours playing in there. You were vibing with the song in the stereo as you started getting closer to your new house’s street. It was Carolina by Harry Styles; you have to admit you’re not the biggest Harry Styles fan in the world, but you were definitely a One Direction fan when you were around 16, but you couldn't be considered a directioner either. You just listened to a few songs and thought it was good. But anyway, this specific song is one that you particularly like. It may have something to do with the fact that you’re from Carolina, of course. But it’s more about the vibe and the melody that by being animated it could actually cheer anyone up and the lyrics were undeniably good though, a little sexual, but good. It’s more about the vibe and the melody that by being animated it could actually cheer anyone up and the lyrics were really good though, a little sexual, but good.

When you turned the right way into the street of your new home, you came across much more than you expected to see on your moving day. There were, as it seemed, paparazzi. Apparently they were shooting a movie right in your street, and it had also many people with many cameras and trailers that probably were dressing rooms. Naturally, you knew that thousands of films were shot in California, that’s obvious. But you didn't expect one to be shooting exactly on your moving day and specifically in your street, let alone that the street would be this crowded since the world is experiencing a global pandemic, ironic. You observed some of the people walking down the street, or should you call it a set? You don't know, but there were many people and many cars, at least they were all wearing masks. It had many classic cars, probably in the 40s or 50s style. They were colorful; vivid colors, though. Colors like yellow, blue and lilac was really present. To resume, the whole street looked like a movie from the 50s and for sure that was the intention because you could notice some extras walking around the set dressed up as 50s people used to.

As you carefully drive through the street, you’d notice that from what seemed like a divine miracle, there was a vacant parking spot right in front of your house and you can’t help but smile when you see it. The first time you came here to see the house. You were with your family, and that was about four months ago. You just loved the house completely as it had such a different vibe from the place you used to live in New York, and honestly, just the thought of the house made your creativity activate as it had some really cool colored walls and you bought some colored mobile as well. Anyway, you stopped the car right in front of your house finishing the engine and grabbing your mask and putting it in your face as you'd use your hand to get rid of the seat belt and your other hand to open the car door and get out of the car.

After closing the driver's seat door, you go around the car walking to the trunk where you use the car key to open it. When you open it, you are faced with two cardboard boxes. One was full of books. Books of all kinds, books of period novels, books of suspense, books of investigation and etc. Books that piqued your curiosity and made you want to finish reading it as quickly as possible. The other box was already full of clothes, those last clothes that you would finally be taking home. Your mother has done the biggest job in the moving issue; she was the one who was bringing the furniture and your things while you finished packing the rest of your things to leave New York. You try your hardest not to pay attention to the set of recordings and the people who walked back and forth, at the same time that you tried hard not to make any noise, because if you accidentally disturbed a scene, you would feel extremely embarrassed and would probably not even show up at the gate until the end of filming, but that was not the case. You removed the two boxes from the trunk just before closing it completely. You chose, perhaps, to enter the clothes box first. You bent down taking the box in your arms and walked to the door of the house where you used the key you received from the real-estate agent to unlock it before entering. You immediately noticed that some sunbeams reflected on the living room floor due to the white linen curtain that covered the glass windows. You observed the contrast of the sofa in such a light tone with the lilac wall just behind it. You walked with the box in hand by the door extension to the room where you placed the box on the small coffee table in front of the sofa. Returning out of the house, you can see the figure of a tall man dressed in a brown suit crouched in front of the box of your books. He had brown hair and properly cut. It didn't look like he was messing with your books, but he was definitely looking at them and it seemed like he was trying to read the covers of it for some reason. You slowly got closer to the man's body without making too much noise while you analyzed him, you crossed your arms upon your chest as you noticed the book cover he was looking at: Love is a mixtape by Rob Sheffield.

— This one is amazing! — You said, surprising the man that stand up fastly with the book in his hands connecting his green gaze with yours. He was tall, really tall by the way. His suit seemed perfect, just as his hair. He had a black mask on as a protection but the 16 year old teenager inside of you could never mistake those eyes. It was Harry fricking Styles. You considerated being quiet as you, yourself were pretty surprised now, but then you took your gaze to the book in his hand and then back at his face — It's like comparing love to a popular song that we usually search to define love. Just to find out that love is like oxygen, or love is a kind of drug, or a battlefield for some... — You said referring to the book with a tender smile on your face that Harry couldn't essentially see, but talking about a book that you loved caused this on you. And as you talked you didn't notice that Harry had a smile on his face as well. Maybe it was because you completely ignored the fact that he is Harry Styles and he was messing up your books as he's on the set filming a movie, or maybe it was the fact that he loved this book just as much as you did. He'd use to say this is probably one of the books that if he had to read just one book to the rest of his life, he'd chose this one and he usually had so much to talk about this book and so much to put on an argument about it but now he was completely speechless. He was just tongue tied. He was tongue tied about your reflection of one of his favorite books and how it looked so identical to his own personal reflection. He was tongue tied for the number of great books that he always wanted to read that was on that box. He was tongue tied at the owner of those books and her beauty, her intelligence of her voice and her voice as well so he just chuckled. A nervous chuckle as he leaned his head to look at the floor for a second before looking at you and holding out the book in his hands to you that calmly took it from his hands.

— I know! It's one of my favorite books! — Harry'd ultimately manage to say it as he observed you admiring the cover and running your fingers through it as a truly book lover would do — It's very interesting the interpretation you have of it.

— Don't you agree? — You'd interrupt him rising your head to examine at his face. He seemed paralyzed by some way, little did you know that Harry was mesmerized. He enjoyed the informal way you were speaking with him, and it genuinely felt like you already knew it each for years.

— That's the intriguing part. We have the same interpretation! — He'd say serenely, and then running his hand through his hair as he frown a little because of the sun that just hit on his glowing eyes.

— Well...Maybe you're just trying to imitate me to impress me! — You'd joke, with a mocking expression on your face making Harry giggle at your words and your face. It was the sense of humor to him.

— Oh really? And what makes you think I'm trying to impress you? — Harry'd say back with the same mocking tone that you formerly used. He'd observe your face go from playful to thoughtful in just as you to come up with a response.

— I mean...you were the one looking through my stuff, mister! — You say raising your eyebrows as you utilized one of your hands to take some strands of hair out of your face.

— Right... — Harry said with a defeated voice before as he compressed his lips together and moved his suit away from his shirt a little as he places his hands on his waist — I'm sorry about it, though. There was this box hanging here and I guess I was just intrigued! — He said shyly making you start walking towards the box walking closely to him causing him to feel a hot warm from your body as you passed. You'd bend over to grab the box but was stopped by Harry taking the heavy box from your hands — Let me help you with this! — Harry said as he held the box on his arms.

— There's no need for that. It'll ruin your splendid suit! — You'd say gently to him as he was standing up in front of you carefully holding the loaded box. Legitimately, he looked hot. He properly looked like a 50s husband helping with the moving with this outfit — And if you piss off your costume designer because of me I'll die! — You'd complement receiving a loud laugh from Harry's lips that shook his head while looking at you.

— She’ll be fine! — Harry'd argue back, then get a sigh from you before nodding at him as a statement.

— My house is right there! — You'd say using your right hand to point at your house, watching Harry turn his back to you and start walking towards it. You followed him through the door that was already open. Harry looked at the house immediately. It had a good vibe, and he wouldn't deny it. The choice of colors was exceptional, but he also noticed it was not very tidy, which would probably indicate that you were moving today.

— Where do I leave it? — Harry asked, referring to the box as he went farther into the living room.

— You can just leave it on the floor — You serenely said crossing your arms together and watching as he left the box on the floor and turned around to face you, but then deflecting his gaze to the ceiling before staring at your face again.

— It's a beautiful house! — Harry said as he moved his gaze through the room. He observed everything. He likes to observe. He likes to notice things that maybe other people didn't — Just like the owner, if I might say — Harry said cheekily and charming hearing your giggle invade his ears as you started walking towards the box of books that he previously set on the floor.

— The owner says thank you — You said bending down and starting to take the books out of the box and place it on the coffee table beside you as Harry watched your movements. You shyly looked at him thinking for a second and them smiling under your mask — For both compliments! — You said getting your attention back to the books. It's not that you don't want to give him your attention. It's that you genuinely think that he's just being nice, and he's probably not even interested in anything that you say.

— So... I have to go back to the film now but maybe you can give me your number so we can talk about your interpretation of my favorite book — Harry said shyly. His words took you by surprise actually but you couldn't hold back the smirk you had under your mask as you stand up again turning to face his green eyes. You noticed that he had his phone on his hand, hoping and waiting that you'd give him your number even though both of you knew that the book excuse was nothing more than an excuse as he was truly interested in knowing you.

— Well, it depends... — you said slowly as you took a deep breath before actually saying anything — If you agree to read my favorite books too, I'll give you my number!

— I'd be honored! — Harry chuckled after letting a sigh out feeling relief that you asked for something so simple that he'd love to do if that would make you happy — What's your name? — Harry said as he unblocked his phone screen and started to save your phone number.

— Save it as Elizabeth Bennet in there! — You said fastly with a proud smile on your face as Harry giggled and did as you ask and then looked at your face as he put his phone back on his pocket.

— Only if you save my name as Mr. Darcy when I call you! — Harry said knowing that after this, Pride and Prejudice would definitely become one of his favorite books ever.

#hwrryscherry #harry and y/n #harry styles and y/n #harry x reader #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #harry styles au #harey styles blurb #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles blurb #harry styles one shot #boyfriend harry styles #harry styles imagine #harry styles imagines

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littleoddwriter · 3 years

Text

Hope | Roman Sionis x Male!Reader

Guess what - It’s another vent fic! I promise to keep going with the requests I still have open, very soon. Be patient some more, please. Inspiration comes and goes pretty quickly at the moment. Anyway-

summary; You are being rejected by another potential therapist you contacted and you’re not dealing well with it, but Roman’s here for you to make you feel better.

Notes: TW // RSD (Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria); Self-Harm (cutting); Bad experiences with therapists mentioned; (mild) Dissociation; Implied Suicidal Tendencies; Hospital Mention. Emotional Hurt/Comfort; Hope; Hugs; Love Confessions; Soft Kisses; Roman is trying his best.

For over a year, you’ve been searching for a new therapist to go to. Unfortunately, you kept being rejected left and right and were therefore forced to fight everything on your own for the time being. You couldn’t go back to your previous therapist for several reason, the biggest one being that she wasn’t good for you. She’s put you down a lot, mocked you, laughed at you, never helped you with anything you’ve told her, and you’ve finally reached the point, where you’ve officially had enough, taking all your courage to stop seeing her.

Yet, you hadn’t expected to not find one willing therapist to take on your case. It was extremely frustrating and hurtful. It made you lose hope of ever receiving the help you needed, and deserved. You didn’t want to live from hospital to hospital. The last time you’ve been there, it didn’t really help you anyway. So you wanted to keep away from them for now. You just wanted to have a chance on living your life, while you were being treated for your issues.

A while ago, you’ve received another therapist’s data from your social worker. It took you a long time to fight your anxiety over the pending phone call. Eventually, time was a little pressing, since you wanted to have some results to show to your social worker at your next appointment with her.

So you forced yourself to call in the morning before you did anything else and could potentially put it off any longer.

Trembling, sweating, and with a pounding heart, you picked up your mobile phone and dialled the number, checking it five times to make sure it was the right one, and after a minute of encouraging yourself verbally, you hit the green button to make the call go through.

It didn’t even ring, after the dial, it clicked and the therapist’s voice rang through your ears. She sounded as if she had just gotten up, which surprised you and made your anxiety spike even more. You greeted her and stated that you were looking for a therapist, hoping that your smile was audible and that you seemed friendly.

“How’d you get this number?”

You faltered.

“M-my social worker gave it to me. She said I should give you a call?”

“Ah. Well, the earliest that I’d have time for a first session would be in a month at the earliest.”

“That’s okay,” you replied quickly, lightly. It wouldn’t have been a problem to wait another month after all this time.

“Do you have any diagnoses? What are your issues?”

Quickly you listed off your diagnoses, making sure there were no surprises this time. You had even written it all down, just in case your anxiety would have gotten the better of you.

“I can’t help you with that.”

It was the same as always. You had expected that, especially since she wasn’t the type of therapist you were recommended by others. Your social worker had insisted on trying different approaches, though. Which is exactly what you’ve told this therapist, but she wouldn’t even consider it, only repeating that she wasn’t the right one for you because she didn’t even cover all the disorders you had. After that you already said your quick goodbyes.

You carelessly let your phone fall onto the table, trying hard to hold back tears. The rejection just wasn’t something you could handle very well; it ate you up, ripped your heart apart and fogged up your brain.

Shaking your head to clear it a little, you got up and went straight to the guest bathroom. Roman was showering in your shared one at this moment, and you were glad about it, even though you had to be quick anyway.

On autopilot, you opened one of the drawers under the sink and got out the small blade you kept there, hidden and kept safe in a paper towel. You disinfected it, just in case, and then looked at it for a moment. Now was the time that you could still put it back and stop yourself from ruining your recent best streak. Before you had even realised it, though, you watched yourself press the blade into your forearm’s skin, drawing a short line. Blood quickly welled up from the new wound.

It wasn’t enough. You were almost there, but it wasn’t enough. Only an inch below the spot you’ve just cut, you nicked your skin once more, creating a smaller, but just as deep, incision. Sighing, you put the blade back where it was, nursed your wounds and got out of the bathroom.

The twin band-aids glared at you. You could see them out of the corner of your eyes at any given moment, which made your insides fill up with guilt all too quickly, choking you from within.

Trying to ignore the evidence of the mistake you’ve just made, you sat back down at the table and looked through your phone, while you were anxiously waiting for Roman to be done with his morning routine.

Eventually, Roman walked over to you, putting his hands on your shoulders and kissing the top of your head. “How did it go?”

You just scoffed, “Same as always. Already got rejected on the phone.” Roman stayed put behind you, so you pressed your arm against your stomach, hoping he hasn’t already seen the band-aids.

“Fuck! I told you I can pay them a visit for you, I’m sure someone would take you then,” Roman offered for the umpteenth time in the past year.

“No, I wouldn’t feel comfortable with that. Thank you, though. It’s sweet of you.”

Clicking his tongue and then humming thoughtfully, Roman ran his hands down your arms, prying your injured one from your body. You didn’t really put up a fight then. It was a lost cause anyway.

“Aw, baby, no. That cunt wasn’t worth it,” he cooed, leaning over you and lifting your arm to take a closer look at the plasters.

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled, feeling your heart clench painfully.

“It’s not your fault. Still, I’d have liked for you to wait for me, or come to me. You’d have been very welcome in the shower, you know?” He gave a quick kiss to the band-aids and let your arm down gently.

You chuckled softly and nodded, “I know, I’m sorry. It all just sort of happened, as if I was completely on autopilot.”

“I get it,” Roman sighed. “Stand up.”

Without questioning it for even a second, you got up from the chair, while Roman took a step back to make room for you. As soon as you stood there and turned around to look at him, he was on you, embracing you. You melted into the hug immediately, burying your face in the crook of his neck, inhaling the sweet, pleasant scent that was his cologne.

“We’ll find someone for you. Eventually, someone’s just got to take you in, baby. I promise. Just hold on for me until then, ‘kay?” he spoke softly into your ear, which made you shiver slightly and had you hug him more tightly.

“I’m trying as best as I can, Roman. I swear, at this time, I’m only staying for you anyway.”

Instead of giving you a verbal answer to your confession, Roman leaned back a little, effectively making you look at him; and then he kissed you, oh, so softly. Those kinds of kisses were rare to be initiated by him, which only made you treasure them more. You smiled into the kiss and reciprocated it, sighing.

All of a sudden you felt so light and carefree, as if none of the other things had ever happened. You never wanted it to stop, it was just too heavenly, and you couldn’t bear the thought of returning to the hell on earth that your current situation felt like.

Yet, you had to admit that maybe it wasn’t just all hellish.

Roman cared about you and made you feel it. He comforted you when you needed it and didn’t shame you for the things you did. He really was your anchor in this world, the only thing – person – keeping you somewhat afloat and fighting every day. He made it worth the pain. In a way, he was the hope you so desperately clung onto.

It was one of the many reasons why you loved him so much, why you would never dare to leave him, even when your brain was screaming at you to do so for whatever new reason it had come up with that wasn’t real.

“I love you, Roman. Thank you,” you whispered when you two finally broke the kiss.

His eyes turned so gentle and soft for a split second, and he lifted one of his hands from your back, cupping your face with it, and stroking his thumb over your cheek. “I’ve got you, my prince,” he replied.

It made your heart flutter. You knew it was his way of saying ‘I love you’ back to you. You appreciated it more than you could ever truly put into words.

#tw self harm #tw suicidal #ok to reblog #x male reader #male reader #male reader insert #roman sionis #roman sionis x male reader #roman sionis x reader #roman sionis fanfiction #mlm fiction #ewan mcgregor #ewan mcgregor x reader #ewan mcgregor fanfiction #so anyway this happened yesterday and i really wish i had roman IRL with me to comfort me like that because damn I need it

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whatifxwereyou · 3 years

Text

Don't Forget to Breathe

Kung Lao + comfort

I have a lot of nervous energy right now and things are chaos in my life. I sat on my floor packing and just wrote this nonsense. It made me feel a little better. I hope it makes someone else feel better too.

I can’t figure out how to do the read more shit on tumblr mobile to save my life, so rip. It’s short anyway. Thanks @aexonian for helping me figure out the below the cut nonsense!!

Your chest was tight. It had been for days. Things kept piling up and while you tried to juggle a million responsibilities, you kept dropping things you needed to carry. It seemed your best just wasn't good enough- but that was all you could do. Your best.

It was the little things now that were your undoing. Spilling a drink. Not being able to find a pen. Too many people talking at once. The overstimulation sent you from zero to bitch in a snap. Then you felt terrible about snapping and the cycle repeated.

You needed a break but life didn't stop just because you hoped it would. The anxiety wouldn't go away just because your wanted it to either. What a terrible malfunction. An instinct designed to protect that instead kicked into high gear sometimes for days and weeks at a time without any relief.

But you had learned to function with it years ago so that very often, no one could even tell you were struggling to do the little things. Eat. Sleep. Wake up. Bathe yourself. It was easier to complete tasks for other people- much less so to do something for yourself. Then when someone did notice your struggle? You were told to relax. Or that your carried it well, that was if you mentioned your were anxious or stressed.

Like relaxing was something that was easily done. Even when you sat still to do nothing, to meditate, you were stressed. There was no magic off button- just bad days and okay days. Your body waged war with your brain.

Today was particularly difficult. Not that anything incredibly bad had happened or anything. It had just been harder than most days. When you'd snapped at Kung Lao for interrupting you, you hadn't even been able to explain why it had upset you. He'd laughed which had never bothered you before but your anxiety-brain was bothered by it now.

It was embarrassing not to be in control of you mind and body. They were all yours, after all. Shouldn't you be able to control them?

For the thousandth time since this had returned a month ago, you meditated. You grounded yourself. You sat alone and tried to clear away anxious thoughts. Sometimes it helped to silence your brain but it rarely did anything for the grip in your chest. But the effort wasn't wasted. In your more frustrated moments? It felt it.

In truth, you were trying. You tried so damn hard. Sometimes you had to try ten times harder to complete a task that someone without anxiety wouldn't give a second thought. You had to give yourself some credit. That was hard too. You felt fake. Like you didn't deserve that credit even if you knew that you did.

Brains could be exceptionally cruel.

"I was told not to bother you." Kung Lao sat next to you, legs stretched in front of him, leaning back on his arms. You didn't look back at him but your moment of quiet reflection had been broken. Not that it had been helping. "Liu said you were figuring things out. That meditation probably helped."

You didn't say anything. Was he looking for an apology for snapping at him earlier? You had already said you didn't mean to.

"I think he gets it better than I do. This whole thing you're going through."

You finally looked at him. He was smiling, watching you with curiosity. Maybe he wasn't looking for an apology.

"This whole thing?" You thought you carried it well.

"You strong silent types. Always waging war in your head. Don't know why you can't just stop it." He shrugged. You didn't know why either. Whatever happened happened no matter what your anxiety had to say about it. You knew that but still, there it was. And it was so loud. "But I can't weigh in on something like that. Doesn't happen to me. Not like it does to you. Not like it does to Liu."

"You don't have to do this." You knew that Kung Lao wasn't exactly the sentimental type. When he was, it swept you off your feet in the weirdest way.

"Do what, y/n? I'm just talking." He was good at that.

"My mistake. Talk away." You didn't mind him talking. It didn't stop you from overthinking but it did keep that inner voice from taking advantage of the usual silence.

"I can't imagine what it must be like, to have something going on in your body beyond your control. Liu said there was no explaining it if I hadn't ever experienced it. He didn't try very hard, admittedly, but he was probably right."

"Do you have a point?" You didn't mean to sound short with him, but you were so tired.

"I just wanted to say you're doing great. Whatever thing you're dealing with? You're doing great." Kung Lao couldn't have possibly known that but there he was with his false confidence. "I think you are at least. If my brain screamed at me all day then you'd never hear the end of it. You never complain."

You laughed and he beamed as if proud of himself for getting you to at least smile. He slipped a comforting arm around your shoulder and you leaned your head against it. Then you sat in silence and for a brief time that was all it was.

Silence.

It wasn't easy to make that kind of anxiety go away but maybe you were doing all you could. Every day was a struggle but you weren't alone.

That was more than you could ask for.

#one off #kung lao x you #kung lao x reader #anxiety #stress #overthinking #mortal kombat #fanfiction #fanfic #drabble #you can do this #you are doing great #one shot

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lumini-317 · 3 years

Text

Hello!

This will be my official “introductory” post!

My real name is Erica, but I go by many names. My nickname repertoire includes but is not limited to: Lumi, Lumini, Cricket (I have a habit of rubbing my feet together, lmao), Jinx, Eri, Er, EriJoy, Sunbaeby, and Aceir (my real name but in alphabetical order).

This is my first ever Tumblr blog. I’ve had it for a while but have rarely posted anything, that along with the fact that I’m on mobile is kind of a mess so I apologize for mistakes and all that.

I have 3 older brothers, an older sister, and a younger brother.

I’m an ambivert. Sometimes I love hanging out with bigger groups of people, other times I dread it.

I’ve taken the “16personalities” test 4 times and all 4 put me in the “Diplomat” category, however I got “Advocate” (INFJ) 2 times, and “Protagonist” (ENFJ) and “Mediator” (INFP) 1 time each.

I am LGBTQ+. I’m asexual, aro+panromantic flux, and while I feel like I’m genderfluid, the changes are very subtle and so I sometimes just go with agender, gendervoid, or neutrois. It’s a lot less complicated that way. I’m ambiamorous, and also pronoun apathetic!

I love whump. I’ve loved it for as long as I can remember but only found the whump community maybe 3(?) years ago.

I also love K-Pop, C-Pop, J-Pop, and Asian dramas, mainly K-Pop and K-Dramas, though.

I’m a HUGE multistan. ATEEZ, SKZ, TBZ, EXO, BTS, Red Velvet, SHINee, iKON, MONSTA X, TWICE, TO1, WANNA ONE, SuperM, X1, MIRAE, Ciipher, Golden Child, Purple Kiss, BAE173, SF9, IU, ONEUS, ONEWE, The Rose, PIXY, LUCY, STAYC, WEi (which I pronounced as “way” for an embarrassingly long time), Dreamcatcher, Brave Girls, TXT, ENHYPEN, SNSD, KARD, AKMU, SHAUN, Gaho, NCT, GHOST9, 1team, SE7EN, Cross Gene, D1ce, AB6IX, CRAVITY, BLACKPINK, CIX, VIXX, f(x), 4Minute, CLC, YEZI, B.I, Wonho, (G)I-DLE, EVERGLOW, SEVENTEEN, BROOKLYN, Ha Hyunsang, DAY6, GOT7, Teen Top, BAP, TREASURE, UNIQ, etc! It goes on, far longer than I can list. I am also very much against fanwars, they disgust me.

I’m also a HUGE animal lover, and a big softie. I can’t even squish insects. I don’t care that they can’t feel pain and don’t experience emotions, I just can’t bring myself to. I make it my mission to save any type of animal I come across. I find toads in our koi pond and immediately pick them out and take them to a safe place. I help turtles across the road. I got a mouse out of a puddle and revived it, releasing it when it was healthy enough. I saw a snail on a piece of wood that was going to be thrown on a fire and carefully pulled it off and put it somewhere else. So far I’ve found 5 stray cats (Piper, Toothless, Felix, Kai, and Kit Kat—all were found as skinny, sickly kittens) and took them in, raising them as my own. I rescued a chipmunk from certain death-by-cat. I’ve even saved a few baby raccoons, ducklings, lizards, spiders, and snakes in my time. And I’ll keep doing so for as long as I live.

I love writing, drawing/sketching, and painting, however I’m not confident that I’m good at any of those things, lmao. I mean, I don’t think I’m the worst, but my finished “works” often leave me unsatisfied with my “skills”. But of course, that won’t stop me from trying to improve!

I’m a maladaptive daydreamer. This can cause issues in some places while helping me out in others. On one hand, it makes doing chores and such kind of difficult. Like one time I had to take care of my dad’s pigeons while he was fixing our shed and one time he pointed out how slow I was with the chores. His words were something along the lines of, “I’m already almost done with what I have to do and you’re still working with the pigeons.” Also, it (and maybe ADHD if I do have it?) made school a nightmare for me. But it’s also helpful because then during church it’s really easy to keep myself occupied while the pastors go on about their Magical Sky Daddy™’s son throwing a tantrum and killing a figtree because it didn’t have any figs and how that story should “challenge” us or something.

The characters in my daydreams are weird, though. They merge and separate with each other to make different characters depending on the situation. Most of them don’t have definite genders. Only a handful of them have names because they’re always merging and separating like some kind of Shadow Clone Masters or something. Stuff like that.

One of my characters is for sure a demi-boy, though, and his name is Kyler.

I brought this up because I was watching The Andy Griffith Show and Andy was giving Opie a lecture on how many poor kids there are in the world and used the ratio “one and a half boys per square mile”. Opie then says that he’s “never seen a half a boy before”. Kyler just sort of pops into (fake) existence, jumps off the couch, and throws his arms in the air while saying, “Half a boy, right here!” I burst out laughing. Thankfully it didn’t seem weird, since my parents started laughing at Opie and thought that I was just laughing at it, too.

Any-who.

If I daydream while I’m standing, I’ll often pace and gesture with my arms while moving my lips. Sometimes I’ll even whisper. If I’m sitting down, I usually fidget a lot (such as pick at my shirt and rub my feet together), stare into space, and move my lips or whisper. My family sometimes ask me, “Why are you whispering?” Or, “What are you grinning about?” And I just shrug because I don’t know how to explain it to them without risking them calling someone to pray over me, lmao. I mean, I wasn’t even allowed to have imaginary friends because that was “evil”. When I was about 7, I told my parents about my imaginary unicorn friend and they gave me a lecture and “prayed over me”. It was embarrassing and awkward for me.

I’m suspicious that I might have ADHD, but don’t have the money to actually get a professional diagnosis. I’m also too scared to ask my parents about it.

Speaking of which, my family and I don’t see eye-to-eye. I mean, they don’t know it because I’m good at hiding it, and they think I agree with mostly everything they do but boy, is it a mess.

You see, they’re evangelical conservative Christians. “LGBTQ+ people are going to hell”, “ThE LeFt ARe eViL AnD ARe TrYiNg To BrAiNwAsh OuR ChiLdrEn”, “Trump was sent by God”, “Intersex is fake”, “Women must submit to men”, “You should get married no later than in a year or ‘the temptation’ to have sex might become too much”, the whole bit.

Meanwhile I’m over here with my (imaginary) pride flags, just existing as an agnostic leftist who wants everyone to have equal rights, regardless of gender identity or sexual orientation, and would rather redo my horrifically atrocious kindergarten closing program role than pray to a god who (if they/he/she/it/whatever exists) gives cancer to kids and killed millions of innocent animals and people in the Bible.

But they have no idea that this is how I feel and now expect me to be baptized within the next month to show that I have “accepted Jesus Christ as my savior”. Yeah...that’s gonna be an awkward discussion...

Anyway, that’s just some things about me. Sorry that I got sidetracked a few times, lmao!

I look forward to posting more and maybe even making friends!

Thank you for reading (:

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xnchxntmxnt · 3 years

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How would Kageyama and Oikawa react to an insanely talented and skilled volleyball player during the timeskip? Hope you don't mind making this a headcanon!

Setters Meeting a Talented Volleyball Player

Characters: Oikawa Tooru, Kageyama Tobio CW// maybe light cursing I don’t remember Reader info: Gn!reader, adult reader LIGHT TIMESKIP SPOILERS

please don’t repost my edits but you’re welcome to use them for icons & headers & things just credit me

Sorry this took so long! Writers block and/or depression has been kicking my butt lately but I’m trying. Headcanons are great to get my brain going

I am s o bad at writing Oikawa but I tried my best! I hope you like it

Sorry for any spelling mistakes my thumb was kinda screwed up when I wrote this & I mostly type on mobile & grammarly doesn’t always catch everything and I’m a lazy editor lol

Oikawa Tooru

can we talk about how FAST this man would fall in love

Like especially if his first time seeing you would be during a game

So he’s playing beach volleyball right and he’s about to start another game

And he’s being his playful flirtatious self beforehand

Joking around, kinda teasing you a little (probably for being short if you’re shorter than him, if not, then for being absurdly tall) (doesn’t matter if you’re only taller/shorter by like a half inch he’s still gonna tease you about it)

He’s talking a little smack, y’know, now being a jerk but being competitive

And then he seems you play

The first time he sees you serve he’s so awestruck that he freezes and forgets to hit the ball

And promptly is kinda yelled at by his teammate (how I wish it was iwa 😭)

But he can’t keep his eyes off of you seriously

He’d probably start flirting with you when your game is done (or even during the game)

But still be in absolute awe of you like

“Where did you learn to do that? That's amazing??”

*insert answer here*

“That’s actually--you're so brilliant i've been playing since i was a child and I couldn't do that till high school--”

Someone bless this sweet summer child i love him a lot

(^^ I guarantee you one of my friends is gonna shoot me for saying that I used to absolutely H A T E oikawa and now I have a very strong love hate relationship with this guy. Idek anymore)

But anyway

He’s trying to keep his cool but it’s not working lol he’s geeking out because he thinks you’re so cool

He’s charming & charismatic tho and slips in something about practicing together

So you agree to practice together one day which turns into more practices and eventually a formal date and mwah *chefs kiss* it’s great

He started out as a simp and he’s still a simp and no one else sees it so they think ur crazy when you know how whipped he was for you on day one

Kageyama Tobio

Anyone else remember the face he made when he say hinata at karasuno in ep 1 for the first time

That

That's the face

That's the face he makes because he's in such s h o c k that someone is as good as him/the people on his team

The Adlers went on this little vacation thingy as a kind of team retreat thing and none of them know how to get away from work so of course, they were playing volleyball

These idiots I love them

You watched the game for a little while until the round was over

And ran up to kageyama and asked if you could play

The socially awkward dude that he is stumbled out an awkward “yeah sure” and soon you were on his team for the next round against hoshiumi and ushijima (because that’s a fair match up lol)

The first time you spiked a ball passed the two of them he just

S t a r e d

He was in such shock he didn’t see ushijima serve and the ball hit him straight in the face

Which resulted in a bloody nose and the game to end a little early

Ushijima apologized of course but kageyama was more embarrassed than anything

He got all patched up and found you a couple minutes later

His nose was a little swollen and he was still pinching it trying to get it to stop being painful, but hey, he got to talk to you again

You offered to take him out to drinks one day when he felt better, to which he agreed and you two went on you first formal date later that week

Anyway thats on be being dumb lol anyway I hope you enjoyed! I hope that’s what you wanted lol i realize the last one I did might have been me interpreting it a little weird. But whatever these are always fun to write, thank you for sending in asks! My inbox is always open if you have ideas or reqs

Sending love to you all <3

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