#for going 'i dont have expectations ' over and over again i sure wrote a lot huh

[falmerbrook]

what are your tes 6 expectations?

hmmm interesting question.

Firstly, it sounds like it's basically all but confirmed to be in Hammerfell based on analysis of that one "please shut up about TES 6" trailer by people who know more than me, and the fact that ESO has kinda avoided dipping their toes too substantially into the province despite covering the rest of them pretty thoroughly. On one hand that's sorta meh because if so it'll be the third game in a row to focus on a human province, but on the other hand ESO and Redguard have kinda gotten me into Hammerfell, so I won't be sad or disappointed if it indeed is. I've seen some say they think it will or want it to focus on the the Iliac Bay (so both High Rock and Hammerfell), but I think that's a bit of a cope.

In terms of everything else, I'm gonna be honest, I don't really have any expectations. I'm by no means a gamer, and the TES games are pretty much the only ones I play, so from my time poking around TES communities, I don't think I have as high or complex of expectations for my gaming experience as someone who plays games beyond just being weirdly obsessed with a particular game series. I'll also admit that I can be a bit of contrarian, so seeing people get genuinely angry at things they assume will happen with TES 6 as if they have already been confirmed to be happening has made me sort of be overly optimistic about it by default. I think by not having expectations I'm less likely to be disappointed if it is disappointing (which, once again, it sorta hard to achieve by my low standards), and I won't be too burned by being optimistic since no matter what, I'll probably just enjoy running around a part of Tamriel either way. It'll probably be fairly similar to Skyrim, but hell, I'm not a game developer. Who am I to say what direction they'll take.

If Oblivion supposedly had a lot of influence from Lord of the Rings, what might TES 6 have inspiration from? Maybe they'll see how well BG3 did and lean in that direction (writing wise) more? The new Dune movies have come out right as its started proper development, so maybe they'll take from that (y'know, deserts)? Maybe they'll just do their usual of building off of new systems they implemented in their last game (which would be Starfield, which I haven't played and don't know what new things they played around with, so I don't know what it will be) and/or the DLCs of the last TES game (although maybe it's been too long since Skyrim for that).

The one thing I am tentatively hoping for is that these like 4 years of pre-development shows in the worldbuilding and writing. But like I said, I'm not expecting much. Just trying to be contrarily optimistic.

Also I made this post awhile ago about what I hope they change about Redguard history if TES 6 is in Hammerfell. Not the same topic but I thought I might as well include it

So tldr: I don't really have many expectations period, positive or negative, but I'm cautiously looking forward to it. I don't really know what to expect outside of the typical Bethesda open world structure.

#mine #ask #tes 6 #for going 'i dont have expectations ' over and over again i sure wrote a lot huh

[malewifesband]

Here is a Labru fic I wrote over the last week or so. Post-canon. Extremely sexually explicit, 18+ only please. Trans male Kabru, and yes, Laios is a little chasery about it--be honest, you should expect this of him. 7.5k words.

Summary: With Marcille and Falin both gone temporarily from the castle*, Kabru and Laios have had a high workload, and the stress has started to get to them. Kabru has an ingenious solution to relieve stress, but Laios is not so sure it's a good idea: his feelings for Kabru are confused enough without adding the concept of platonic dick-touching to the mix.

*Will be followed up on in its own fic.

This and future fics will be filed under the tag #the compendium; because I dont like any fanfic sites.

Lots of things seemed to demand Laios' time: a deluge of common folk with grievances and indignant nobles angry at their recent vassalage and farm owners who didn't like whatever ordinance Laois had passed to increase food production because they didn't want to milk minotaurs and still more peasants complaining about the farmer he just saw, and on and on, forever, without end, it would rain pissed off subjects for forty days and forty nights and Laios could drown in the all the information they wanted him to track. Kingship was a nightmare.

He could and would say it was worth the pain to see when his plans succeed and happy faces of people whose lives were improved, but in honesty what actually made it bearable was the company and help of Falin, Marcille, and Kabru. Falin and Marcille were wonderful court mages and fantastic researchers, who made all his stupid ideas into real, actionable policy, and Kabru… Kabru helped him get even that far. It was incredible how quickly he would catch onto complex social dynamics and dissect them, remix them into something Laios could parse, and whisper it to him on the throne. All without missing the next beat.

And for the past month, he’s been over-relying on Kabru, and neither of them have been able to get away from the castle. Marcille and Falin have been having a rough patch, and decided they needed time together away from the castle. Which of course, Laios let them go take a vacation–he owed them that much. But while they've been away, tensions have exploded. The resurfacing of the Golden Continent has lead to droughts across the land as crop fields used to an abundance of rain from the coastline suddenly found themselves far inland, and foreign land holders were demanding compensation, and of course their rulers backed them as it meant they would not have to pay to feed the victims of an impending famine. (And no one seemed willing to farm monsters to eat despite their abundance. Close-minded jerks–it’s a necessity!)

The ordeal has been taxing on them both, and Maybe Kabru more than Laios. He’d been taking dinner in his quarters the last two days, and he's been standing about a foot further from the throne than he was before. Odd little distances from Laios he didn't take before. Laios feels like he's barely seen him in a week. He’d reminded him to eat and sleep plenty, and Kabru insisted that he had been. Laios wasn't sure what else he could really do.

A line of delegates had been leaving the dining room, a late meeting over dinner that perhaps no one wanted to have, one night when Kabru leaned in again, just as the door closed, and said, “Laios, can I talk to you about something, man to man?”

Laios was not sure how else they were meant ro talk, being as they were both men and thus couldn't talk, say, woman to woman or dog to dog, but he replied, “Sure, what's up?”

Kabru’s face darkened. “Not here. Let's talk in your chambers. I’ll meet you there in 30 minutes.”

It didn't feel like a long wait. He’d only really started to settle down when Kabru knocked at the door.

“Come in,” He called, kicking off his boots. Kabru entered, smiled at him, and then turned to bolt the door behind him. He took a deep breath and turned back to face Laios.

“You know I love this job,” he says.

“That’s great–” Laios starts to exclaim, but Kabru holds up a finger to silence him

“BUT. I have no time for women anymore, and it's been… frustrating.”

“What about Rin? She's a woman,” he said. She was pretty and they seemed pretty close.

“That's very true, Laois, Rin is a woman, but she's also like a sister to me. I could never date her.”

“Do you want time off?” He couldn't imagine running things without him, and Yaad insists that because he doesn't know how long he'll last in this world, that he should refrain from interfering so they do not depend too much on his service when he finally passes… Surely though, he’d be okay with filling in for Kabru for a couple of days? Maybe best not to tell him it's so Kabru can go on dates.

“No, it's not a real solution,” he says. He takes a deep breath, and his face flushes, getting darker again. “I don't think I could get away enough to meet my needs, I’d still be sexually frustrated.”

People get mad at you if you suggest they just go to a brothel for an hour or so, so Laios doesn't say that. Instead he tries, “You could invite a girl over for dinner, that seems like a cool date: dinner in a castle!”

The flush darkened.

“That's too serious. I’m not really looking for a girlfriend right now, not with how much work there is to do.” He averted his eyes from Laios' face, and crossed his arms.

“We could have an informal dinner–”

“Laios.” he said, firmly, like calling on a misbehaving dog. Something about that thought made Laios' heart flutter.”I’m trying to ask something of you. Please don't make any suggestions yet.”

He looked sweaty.

“Okay.”

He took another deep breath.

“I think it'd be easiest if we masturbated each other.”

Woah. Laois’ face fell into shock, open mouthed and wide-eyed like a fish gasping on deck.

“C-couldn't you just do that alo–”

Once again, Kabru cut him off, this time by touching his elbow.

“You’ve been pent up too,” he said softly, a small smile on his face, which had an odd effect with him still being flushed and sweaty.

Laios had been trying to pay attention to Kabru the way Kabru pays attention to others (it seemed fair to do that for him when he does it for everyone else), and so he knew this was the manner he talked to people he wanted to convince of something they already said they didn't want. In 15 instances of him doing this, Laios had seen him succeed 11 times. It seemed to work by making himself seem nonthreatening–he leans forward in a way that makes him smaller and exposes the neck, and his voice becomes quieter, almost like a purr, and he always smiles but never broadly in a way that shows his teeth.

He was starting to wonder how instance 16 would turn out. So he went quiet while Kabru went on.

“You’ve been as moody as I have, and I know what incredible stress you've been under with Marcille and Falin away, and your other friends unable to visit… We need to find a way for you to relax, and I promise it’ll be more satisfying if you let someone else touch you.”

That much, Laios knew, was true. Like trying to give yourself a hug, there was a certain sensation that was lacking–maybe the warmth of another person, or the fact that you can feel both the skin of your hand and the skin of your penis/body pressed together that makes it less powerful. He didn't have a ton of experience though, none of it with other men–though maybe that was for the best, since Kabru was not like other men and Laios was unsure what exactly to expect from him, genitally speaking. And all of his experiences had been transactional. And not that great.

Honestly, trying to navigate this strange social experience sounded far more stressful than a good orgasm could relieve. Just the thought of trying to figure out where to put his hands and at what point is it sex and can you have sex with your friends and just be friends and and and–

The hand at his elbow slid up to his bicep, and Kabru's other hand slipped around his opposite wrist.

“Tell me what's on your mind, Laios,” he said, gentle and firm.

“Do you have a cock? I’ve never held another man's cock and wouldn't it just be sex either way?” he answered all in a rush, heat rising from his neck to the tops of his ears. Kabru's grip tightened and then relaxed again.

“Yes and no to both,” he said.

“Wait, yes or no to which?”

“Yes and no to both,” he repeated, “If I have a cock depends on what you're asking for, and it's only sex if we say it is and we are saying it's not! It's not as complicated as you're making it out to be.”

Laios disagreed–this was already complicated. It seemed it would only get more complicated if they went through with it. And maybe even more complicated than that if they didn't after this conversation.

“I’ll be gentle, Laios, you're not the first virgin I’ve been with,” he said with a little laugh.

“Hm? I’m not a virgin,” Laios stated.

Kabru's eyes widened a bit, eyebrows raised.

“You… aren't? You had a girlfriend?”

Laios shook his head. “I had a fiancee, but I didn't really know her.”

Kabru exhaled loudly.

“You know what, it doesn't matter. You just need to tell me if you want to try it out.”

Laois really wasn't sure. Something about the whole concept seemed off, but maybe it was just that it felt so sudden and out of the blue. Maybe Kabru had been thinking about it a while, and this really was his best solution. He pictured Kabru calm and content, like how he looks when he takes his tea in the morning before the stress of the day creeps in. If it was really what would make him happy, it didn't seem right to deny him.

“Kabru…” he said low, unsure how to voice what was on his mind.

Kabru's hand slid into his. It was warm. Comforting.

“Yes?”

“Is this really what you want? You're not just asking me because you think I’d want it?”

This question was apparently very funny. He chuckled, then let his face spread into a grin, and laughed heartily. His hand stayed in Laois' and the one at his bicep grabbed at his shoulder now as if to support him.

“I am doing my best to convince you this is a good idea, and you're worried I just think you want it! Do you see how silly that sounds?” he said once his giggle fit wore down.

“I guess,” Laios replied, “But you lied about wanting to eat monsters.”

“I wasn't the one convincing you to eat them, though.”

“I still don't get how it's not just sex though.”

“Think of it as platonic sex between friends if you must then, just don't go telling people we're having sex or they'll get the wrong idea. Actually, please just keep this secret in general.”

Why does sex always have to be some secret thing no one should know about?

Content that Kabru really did want to have not-sex with him (and now discontented with many other things), Laios was ready to give his answer: “Okay, we can do this.”

As soon as the words were out of his mouth, Kabru started leading him to the bed.

“Oh you meant now,” he said.

“Did you… did you want to wait?” Kabru said cautiously. Their hands were still held together. Warm. Comforting. If none of the rest of this was fun, Laios would like to start holding hands with him more at least.

“Now is as good a time as any,” he answered.

“Because it’d make you nervous anticipating it otherwise.”

It wasn't a question, because if Kabru says something about what you think, it's usually because you did and he knows it. And it would make Laois nervous, sitting on his throne, listening to all those people, and having Kabru lean over him all day knowing what they'd be doing later. Which makes it sound very erotic, too. But in that romantic story way where you can just skip over the part where you have to do a lot that day and it'd be weird and honestly kind of strenuous to just be horny all day long: i.e. not actually all that erotic.

Then again, that last hour of waiting…

“Laios, sit on the bed, please.”

He sat on the bed as commanded, while Kabru put out the lights. Perhaps the dark made it less like sex. He left one dim candle and returned.

There was a poof as Kabru sank into the feather mattress beside him. It was quiet for a second.

It felt like Laios should say something, but what? It felt like all the thoughts had emptied from his brain, it was overwhelming, something was about to happen and it felt as dark inside his head as it did in the room. Like a flickering something in the back of his skull that he couldn't look straight at or it would blind him, but it was too dim to reveal anything else on its own.

“I’m going to undress. You should too, let's not overtax the launderer.”

Commands were good. He could follow commands. He stripped off his doublet and shirt sleeves–he had already ditched his finery as soon as he could get away with it–and started unlacing his breeches. His eyes were quickly adjusting to the dim glow, and now he could see Kabru’s outline.

His shirt was off, and he was bent double to remove his own shoes, showing off his back. He was lean, but you could see the strength in him, like a runner or a gymnast. He sat up, shoes tossed aside, and suddenly bucked his hips, and his pants and underwear dragged down his legs. With a little kick, they too lay discarded in the dark and leaving Kabru’s crotch exposed. Thick pubic hair shined there, but no external genitalia that Laios could see, at least not at this angle.

He was actually very curious about it. Certain monsters endogenously change their sex, such as Basilisks and some varieties of Merrow, under certain environmental or social pressures. Sometimes even due to unique genetics not found in others of their species! Kabru had said that he’d been taking a masculinizing hormone since he was old enough to start puberty naturally (apparently elves were rather accepting about such change), so he didn't develop breasts, but what effect that has on human genitalia, Laios was uncertain of. The monsters he knew of that could transition naturally did not have human-analogous genitalia, so he couldn't really conjecture.

“Your breeches are still halfway down your thighs, your majesty,” Kabru said. He laughed.

“Um. Sorry…” Laios hurriedly finished undressing.

And then it was still again.

“We don't have to do this if you don't want to,” he said. They were almost shoulder to shoulder, close enough that Laios could sense his nearness of him by the radiating warmth alone. He felt cold sitting there naked. He wanted to get closer. He didn't know how.

“...I do want to. I just…” he muttered. Kabru didn't prompt him to continue. Instead he put his arm around his shoulders and waited. After a second, he found the words to say, “I feel like I don't know what to do here, or what you want from me. I don't –I don't want you to not like it.”

“You can start by not trying to ogle me,” he replied.

“O-oh, sorry! I just want to know about how sex transitions work for humans! You see, a basilisk hen can become a rooster under specific circumstances, but they have cloaca, so their external genitalia remains the same, and it's similar for merrows, which you might know as the fish-type of merman–though I suppose you could use certain kinds of healing spells to create a penis and testes if you wanted one–”

“Laios, my friend, can we please focus on the task at hand?”

He sounded angry but didn't pull his arm away.

“Sorry! I’m nervous!”

Kabru sighed deeply again.

“If you need me to tell you what to do, then I will. But you better do it the way I tell you. And if you do…” he leaned in closer, the whisper of his breath grazing Laios' ear, “then I will enjoy it. Understood?”

A lump had just formed in his throat, so Laios could only nod once, animated enough for three.

“Good. I’m going to start by touching you. Try to stay still or lean against me.”

The hand at his shoulder began kneading there–at first it was a dull ache, but it soon began to melt into that warmth-comfort that being held by Kabru felt like. He groaned. Kabru's other hand snaked around his waist, more caressing than the deeper massage at the shoulder.

“You carry a lot of tension lately.” Kabru's voice was so quiet, and spoke directly in Laios' ear now, not an inch between them.

The kneading hand moved from the flesh of his shoulder to his neck. His fingers would press gently against his carotid, and the intimacy of it felt exciting. Like a wolf exposing his neck to his packmates, an ultimate show of trust. ‘You could kill me, but I know you wouldn't because of how much I matter to you.’

His nails dragged against his skin, just barely catching as he pulled his fingers back.

Kabru rested his head against Laios' back, nuzzling the nape of his neck, making his hair stand up. The caressing at his waist became firm, then Kabru dug his thumb into the hollow of his hip. Laois' cock twitched.

With excruciating langor, Kabru pushed that thumb down towards his groin, to the crook of his thigh. His knuckles brushed against his shaft as he began rubbing his inner thigh. The increasing tightness in his groin was becoming impossible to ignore.

“Should we kiss?” Laios blurted out.

Kabru paused his ministrations. And that was agonizing too.

“You want to kiss me?” he asked.

“It feels like we should be.”

He started rubbing his thigh again, but on the top of it, not the hypersensitive area near his half-erect cock.

“...We can try it,” Kabru answered. He spoke so slowly and softly, it was more like he was talking to Laois' shoulder than to Laios proper.

He pulled his hand away from Laios' thigh and cupped his jaw instead. Laios turned towards him, and tried to mirror him, bringing a hand to cup Kabru's face too.

It felt incredible to touch him, it made him feel silly that he hadn't been touching him before now. His skin felt so soft, with a hint of the roughness of stubble down his jaw. He rubbed his thumb over the apple of his cheek, where the flesh was plumpest. He wondered how Kabru's lips would feel.

He didn't wonder long.

Kabru pulled him closer by the nape of his neck until their lips pressed together. The feeling was difficult to describe: Kabru's lips felt soft against his, pillowy, but also a bit rough because they were a bit chapped, like he hadn't had enough water, but it wasn't really those qualities that seemed to matter most–it was this almost electrical feeling, like a static shock that surged through him through his heart to the base of his spine. Laois threaded his fingers into the hair at the back of Kabru's neck, enjoying the silky texture, and tried to deepen the kiss, get more of this feeling–

Clack!

Their teeth clashed and Kabru drew away quickly. He took his hand back from Laios' thigh to tend his teeth.

“Try to walk before you can run,” he hissed behind his hand.

“What does that mean? You're trying to have us masturbate each other and I’m just trying to kiss!”

“If you want to stop–”

“No, I don't want to stop! I just want you to make sense!”

“You are so frustrating!” he cried and fell back on the bed.

It just doesn't make sense! There was some essential divide between the way Kabru was acting and what he was saying and it bothered Laios. For once, he didn't feel like he’d done something wrong here. Except hurting his teeth (his own ached a little too).

“I’m sorry I hurt your teeth,” he said.

“It's fine.” He didn't sit back up.

“Can you please tell me what it is you actually want? None of this makes sense to me. You say you're sexually frustrated, you need to get laid, but we don't tell me to touch you or how you want it–”

“I was going to when I was ready.”

“You couldn't wait to do this, I don't believe that if your goal was quid-pro-quo orgasm, you wouldn't want to go first.”

“And why is that so unbelievable that I’d want you to cum first?”

“I don't know, it was just weird how you were making it all romantic and sensual but you say you don't want it to be romantic.”

He still wasn't getting up, so Laios fell back with him. Now they were both laying down with their legs hung over the side. Laios' erection flopped onto his belly.

“I can't believe you're still hard right now,” Kabru huffs.

“I can't control it, it does what it wants,” he answered.

Kabru chuckled, but then went quiet. Laios wasn't sure what to say. He hoped he hadn't ruined it–he really was enjoying it.

Laios turned towards him on the bed, to look at him, and said, “It’s fun, even though I feel like I don't understand you.”

Kabru didn't turn to face him, he stayed on his back, looking up at the ceiling. But he did talk again.

“I’m sorry. I–I don't know why I thought this was a good idea.” He sounded upset.

Laios grabbed his hand, and hoped that it felt as nice to Kabru as it felt for him.

“Laios…” he said, squeezing his hand, “I think I like you. Romantically, not just as a friend. I’m sorry I’ve made you uncomfortable.”

And that… That made more sense.

“Why didn't you just say something?” 

“I’ve tried so many times and the words just die in my throat! Do you know how hard this is? I’ve never liked guys before and now I do and it's you! You, who I spend so much time with and none of it alone–the few times I’ve gotten you alone and tried to flirt or drop a hint or anything, you just don't seem to get it! And then I get so nervous about how to get through to you, I feel ill.”

“You weren't actually sick?!” 

That made Kabru turn around. He slapped his hand to Laios' cheek and pulled. 

“Focus, stupid!” he said.

“Okay, okay!” 

His hold released. But the hand stayed. Laios couldn't help but smile: it really was nice.

“I like it when you touch me,” he said, realized how that sounded, and corrected, “Not just sexually but all the time,” realized how that might sound also, “But I’d like it if you touched me more just maybe as like a boyfriend instead of whatever it is you were doing before!”

Kabru pulled closer to him again–another kiss. This time, Laios let him do what he wanted. It was tender, it sent a shiver through Laios to try not grab him like he was trying to devour him whole, but he couldn't stop himself from cupping his hand over Kabru's and squeezing tight.

Too soon, Kabru pulled away again. He pressed his forehead to Laios' so the tips of their noses touched.

“I’ll fuck you as a boyfriend then,” he purred.

The blood rushed back to Laios’ dick so fast that it left him dizzy. 

“Just lie like that a minute, I need to grab something.”

He did as he was told, but he did peek. 

The candlelight only offered a glimpse of Kabru's silhouette as he got up and knelt by his bag–Laios hadn't noticed he'd brought one. He dug around, and Laios heard the clink of glass against glass. When he stood back up, he held a bottle, some larger, translucent object Laios couldn't make out, and what looked like a bunch of leather straps, and he held something else behind his back. He placed the leather straps and the glass bottle on the end table, and held out the larger object. It was a glass phallus, complete with textured bumps and a tapered end to keep it in place once inside someone. It was fairly small, as phalluses go, but it looked like it would feel perfect inside you. 

“Get up on the pillows, and lie on your back.”

He scooched up and fluffed the pillows.

“Can you guess what I'm going to do with this?” he asked, very cheerily.

“Um. Put it in me?” He’d typically used his fingers when touching himself, and didn't have something as nice as this. 

“Wrong! I'm putting this one in me–though if you ask nicely, I might let you do it. But this–” he pulled his hidden hand from behind his back. Held in his grasp was something Laios had never seen before. It was certainly also a phallus, certainly human shaped (complete with balls), but of a material he’d never encountered–not glass, nor the stuffed leather ones they sell in sex shops with the irritating looking stitches, but something stiff yet flexible enough to bend with the incredible girth of the thing. Maybe rubber? You couldn't easily get rubber on this continent since the trees won't grow here–it must've been expensive. 

“This is the one I want to put in you.”

Laios gasped. 

“That thing is massive! Are you sure?!”

He put the smaller one on the end table, and dropped the big one on the bed, letting it fwump and roll into Laois' side as he got busy putting on his harness. Laios was quickly coming to understand what he meant by ‘I have a cock depending on what you're asking for’. He meant to thrust it inside him like any guy with one growing out of his crotch could.

“Calm down, Laios. I’m not going to just shove it in there. I'm just putting it on, for the feel of it. We’ll stretch you out first.”

Laois could feel himself blush from head to toe. His unattended cock twitched painfully, but he didn't dare touch himself before Kabru got back on the bed and touched him first.

Thankfully the buckling and snapping came to an end. Kabru leaned over to grab the massive dildo, and secured it in place. The straps dug into the flesh around his hips and thighs, and wrapped around the base of the cock and the balls, almost fusing it to him. He uncorked the bottle and poured some of the liquid into his palm, then began stroking himself with it.

“The natural rubber can catch skin and hair if left dry, and it's really uncomfortable. This will help it feel more natural, and we’ll apply more once you're ready of course.”

“Can you get back on the bed now?” Laios said impatiently.

“Ah, now that you're thinking of me ‘like a boyfriend’ you know exactly what you want?” he said.

“Yes! I thought we were clear on that. Do we have to talk more? I’d really rather you touch me again,” he replied, increasingly aggravated every second Kabru was keeping him waiting like this wasn't his idea.

“I don't think I understand you,” he said, but to his credit he was on the bed now, “Any time I try to tease you and flirt with you, it blows up. I say the most humiliating thing I’ve ever said, completely lose my composure, and that's what works. Everytime.”

Laios huffed. He really thought they'd gotten over this by now. He grabbed Kabru's wrist and pulled him closer.

“Just say the thing that you mean first, and you won't be so embarrassed later. Fucking hell,” he said as Kabru toppled on top of him.

Kabru got back up, supporting himself by one elbow as he readjusted his cock, which was currently trying to rut itself into the crease between Laios' thigh and hip.

“Fine, here's my true feelings: you are such an ass.” He slapped his dick down on top of Laios' and dropped down, squeezing them between their bodies and winding Laios. He tried to moan, but with all the air pushed out of his lungs (on purpose!), all he could manage was a gasp.

“You still *gasp* like me though, right?”

He didn't answer, he just nuzzled into Laios' shoulder, kissing the skin where it joined the neck, and then slowly rocked his hips. He wasn't really expecting what it felt like–maybe it would've felt like a handjob did, but it didn't. It felt gentler than that, gentler than the constricted feeling of penetrating someone, yet with firm pressure on his sensitive shaft and head. The weight of Kabru on top of him, pressing their bodies together, felt incredible. He whimpered, his arms moving on their own to hold Kabru around the waist.

“Now you're the one who doesn't make sense. Be more confident that I like you even though I think you're a stupid asshole.”

Laios gasped again and turned to putty–Kabru picked up the pace and kissed his neck in earnest. Laois wanted to wrap his legs around him too, just take every part of him into himself, just absorb him, but Kabru's hands at his hips were locking him in place, and it would take an extreme force of will to try lifting them when it risked Kabru letting go. He went faster, and faster, kissing and tonguing his neck, until–

Kabru stopped abruptly, panting a little (Laois panted a lot). His dick throbbed with need.

“Don��t stop now…!” he whined.

Kabru sat up on his heels.

“I have a mission, Laios,” he said. He leaned over to grab the bottle of lube. He uncorked it, poured more in his palm, recorked it one-handed and put it back. With much squelching and spurting, he lubed up all five of his fingers and the palm too. He positioned himself so that his thighs created a wedge pillow for Laios' hips to rest on. Then, he pulled him up. Kabru's strength was always impressive–but maybe it was more his familiarity with the human body and how it moves, and how to use its natural points of leverage against someone–or for them, if he was about to fuck them in the ass–and that was even more impressive.

It was lucky that Laios tended to keep himself clean to facilitate his own masturbation, because Kabru didn't seem to think about that at all. He took a deep breath and got ready for what he expected next.

Probing finger number one entered, hooked upwards to seek out his prostate. He stroked in and out until he found it, and hit it hard. Precum shot from the tip of his dick. His sphincter clenched from the sudden excessive stimulation.

“Agh! Don't be so rough!”

“Sorry,” he said in his sweetest voice, “I was having fun.”

With a much gentler hand, he stroked it slowly. Once Laios relaxed again, he inserted a second finger. He rubbed at that hollow of his hips as he stroked, then began scissoring his fingers, a little wider each time. he was methodical, trying to work him out as fast as he could. Laios grabbed for his free hand again–he missed how comfortable it was beneath him, and it felt like all he could do was anticipate when Kabru would decide to come down to him again. He put in the third finger.

All of this felt so new, mostly because it was. He’d never had anyone else inside of him, even if he’d done it himself regularly. He’d had sex, but not with a close friend, not with someone who he enjoyed clinging to like slime. It was nerve-wracking, it was exciting, it was a fourth finger squeezing inside.

Kabru whistled.

“To be honest Laios, I was not actually confident I’d be able to get it in tonight, but it seems we will. Good job.”

“Th-thanks,” he said hoarsely. He’d been moaning nonstop for the last ten minutes, so his voice was about spent.

Kabru kept thrusting his fingers, brushing Laois' prostate on every third plunge in exactly, never really letting Laios lose himself in the rhythm of it, or letting him go ahead and cum. He got down to the last knuckle of his hand, and stretched all four fingers inside wide.

“You have definitely done this before,” he said.

“Um, just–ahhh–just to myself.”

Slowly he closed his fingers and withdrew them.

“I think you're ready. Now you get to get me ready.”

Once again, he returned to the end table, pulled the bottle of lube and the much smaller dildo. He handed them to Laios, who had sat up to see what he was doing.

Kabru laid back on his elbows, and lifted his legs to give Laios better access to his crotch.

“Put some lube on that and stretch me out a little so you can put it in,” he said.

Laios rubbed the dildo with the lube, making sure to coat his fingers as he did so.

“Bend down to get to me,” he instructed.

So Laios bent over, ducking the monstrous cock he was going to be taking very soon, and at this angle he could get a good look at Kabru's anatomy.

He had been wrong about the lack of external genitalia–his clitoris hung outside of the labia majora, engorged and standing at half-attention despite the weight of the skin and fat sitting above it.

“Yours is huge,” he said, awestruck. He touched it, holding it between two fingers, stroking it not unlike how he would the tip of his own and eliciting a moan from Kabru. He wondered what it would feel like against his tongue. “Could I suck it? Just for a minute?”

Kabru went very still for a second.

“Please do.”

Laios dove for it, using one arm to support himself, and the other to feel what he couldn't see in the dark, and letting the showy dildo flop onto his head. He took it into his mouth, licking the underside with the flat of his tongue and pressing it into his pallet. He had neither sucked dick nor eaten pussy before, so he couldn't truly compare, but he liked that Kabru's…–well, it should be fine to call it a cock even if there was a much larger artificial one above, dirtying his hair right now–Kabru’s cock was almost exactly a mouthful. It made it easy to loll it about on his tongue, testing the weight and density of it. And all his play seemed to be working wonderfully for Kabru–his thighs shook and his breathing was a bit shallow. He found a rhythm he liked and focused on using his fingers now. He spread apart the lips, and tried to finger him.

His head was unceremoniously pushed away. The heavy dildo flopped down onto the bed.

“You haven't fingered anyone before, have you?” Kabru asked, voice a little shaky.

“Ummm… No.”

Kabru just nodded.

“I’ll show you another time. You won't stay stretched forever,” he said, scratching at Laios' scalp for a second before continuing to push him away, “Go on, lay back as you were.”

He picked up the smaller dildo–which Laios had forgotten in his eagerness–and slowly worked it into himself. Once it was in, he left it there, no further fussing with it. He instead turned his attention back to Laios and his splayed legs. But instead of wedging himself under Laios again, he climbed over him, straddling one of his thighs, and said, “You still have to finish lubing it up, though.”

With a sweet smile, he passed the bottle to Laios again, who uncorked it while he stared down the massive, heavy battering ram strapped to his royal advisor. He poured the viscous substance directly onto the shaft of it and passed the bottle back to Kabru to deal with. He took it in both hands, pumping it slowly, being sure to fully coat it. Kabru hummed in contentment.

“Can I ask something?” Laios said, careful not to stop his work as he talked.

“Hm? Sure, go on,” he answered. He sounded almost blissful.

“If you can't feel it, why do you enjoy this?”

“Um. I suppose…I just like to watch.

“So you’d like it if I sucked this one too?”

Laios could see his Adam's apple bob in the dim light.

“Yes. Yes, I would. But stay focused, please,” he said. He stayed Laios' hands.

In a few swift motions, Laios' ass was back in Kabru's lap, the head of his dick pressed against his sphincter. That slim and strong body holding him in place, readying to fuck him–Laios figured he could understand why Kabru liked watching his partners. It felt good to know you made someone else enjoy themself; it made him feel sexy to see Kabru so focused on him.

Man, he really didn't get to feel sexy often. People didn't seem to really desire him like that. Granted, it's been uncomfortable a lot of the times he's noticed someone else was interested in him, though he wasn't sure why. Why should they be interested in a body like this? There was nothing cool or special about it. It just was. It didn't feel sexy.

So then why did Kabru liking him feel different?

The head pressed past the ring of his asshole, spreading him wide all at once. He inhaled sharply, his legs reflexively tightened around Kabru, forcing him in deeper. Kabru caught himself before he pushed too far too fast. He kept his pace slow and Laios tried to hold his legs still, but couldn't stop the way they twitched. Soon, the head brushed against his prostate. The sheer girth of it as it moved past made it feel like it’d been getting hammered. And still it kept coming for what felt like hours before Kabru finally bottomed out.

When he did, he leaned forward, pushing even deeper, forcing a deep moan from Laios. He couldn't reach Laios' face, but he could press his face to Laios' chest and pepper it with kisses. He ran the tip of his tongue around a nipple, and it made Laios shudder. So he locked his legs around Kabru, squeezing their bodies together.

“You can start thrusting; I’m ready,” Laios said, voice husky with desire. His cock ached for release.

Kabru complied, slowly and carefully at first, but gathering speed each time. The pressure on his prostate on the up-stroke was immense, and as the strokes came faster and faster, the ripples of pleasure coursing through his body were becoming crashing waves. Small gasps and moans too were becoming louder, and if he didn't control himself, the whole castle was going to hear him getting his back blown out. He bit down on his hand to muffle himself.

Soon, he came: thick ropes coated him and Kabru's bellies. He expected Kabru to slow down and stop, but he kept up his feverish pace. The sensation left him feeling dizzy, fuzzy in the head and weak in the limb. It certainly wasn't bad but he was going to pass out if he kept this up.

“Kabru,” he tried to say, but it was so hard to speak like this. He tapped him on the shoulder.

Kabru responded, his own voice hoarse and gasping now, “I’m close, I’m so close!”

No stopping him now–Laios clung for dear life onto Kabru's shoulders. He was flaccid now, but every stroke past his prostate forced more seminal fluid from the tip of his dick, milking him dry.

With a moan and a shudder, Kabru finally relented. He rested his head on Laios' tits, just a moment, giving a few soft kisses while he caught his breath. Laios rubbed his shoulders, keeping his touch light, not wanting to risk arousing him again (he could not handle it if Kabru tried to rut him again so soon).

“Kabru,” he mumbled, too tired to talk properly.

Kabru looked up. His face looked blissful and sleepy. “Hmm?”

“You gotta pull out, man, I am so tired.”

He pushed himself up back to the kneeling position and carefully pulled out. And so Laios immediately fell asleep.

A few moments of sleep later, he woke to Kabru climbing back in bed with him, holding a warm towel.

He was dressed in his night wear, and more candles were lit again so it wasn't quite so dark.

“Here,” he said, pressing the towel into Laois' hands, “Get cleaned up, and put your bed clothes on.”

Laios took the towel and began to wash up what he could. He couldn't have been asleep for very long, as the mess on his stomach hadn't completely dried down, but the feeling of the lube was starting to itch. It was kind of awkward with Kabru just sitting there, and it seemed Kabru felt the same, since he decided it was a good time to talk.

“So… you're feeling alright? No pain?”

Laios hadn't been prepared to talk yet. His mouth felt sticky.

“Mm. Mostly. Just feel kinda sore.”

“Well, let me know if you need a healing spell or anything.” He drummed his fingers on his legs, pointedly not looking at Laios. For his privacy, Laios guessed, though that did feel silly to be concerned about with a guy you were just inside of.

“Water would be nice,” Laios answered.

“Of course, let me grab your glass,” he said, springing back to his feet. He was just acting kind of weird in a way Laios couldn't place.

Kabru had brought in a jug and a couple glasses when he'd come back, along with the hot towel. If anyone saw him passing by, they’d probably think Laios had been sick–at least that's what Laios would think.

Laios finished cleaning himself off and bunched up the towel to put in the laundry later just as Kabru turned back to him with the water.

“Thanks,” he said, taking it and gladly chugging it.

Kabru sat on the bed in an awkward silence while Laios picked up discarded clothes and the towel and got himself into something clean, and he was still waiting like that when Laios sat down with him again.

“Are you, like, okay?” Laios asked, trying not to yawn. But fuck was he still tired.

Kabru exhaled hard. He was sweaty again–he was sweaty a lot though.

“What exactly did you mean by saying you wanted me to ‘touch you like a boyfriend’?” Kabru said politely, his focus entirely on Laios. Scanning him, almost.

Laios had not thought of the statement as ambiguous, but pressed to answer he wasn't now sure what he did mean by that. Why the hell did he say it that way?

“I mean that…You're my friend, and I care about you a lot, and I couldn't do any of this kingly mess if you weren't here…” Kabru's stare was intense, and it was making him nervous, “and… You know you're really handsome? And…” he was turning red and sweating, talking was getting physically more difficult, “and… tonight, that was nice? We should… again. Sometime.”

‘Be more confident that I like you…’

Why couldn't they talk about all this before milking his prostate and continuing to fuck him for like ten extra minutes?

An arm snaked around his waist, pulling them close. Laios just wanted to go to sleep like this, pressed against him. He rested his head on top of Kabru's–his hair smelled nice, probably some perfume he used inbetween washes.

“Would you like to be my boyfriend, then, Laios? Is that what you're trying to say?”

Laios dared lay a kiss in that bed of curls; he dared to wrap his own arms around Kabru.

“Yeah, it is.”

“We’ll have a lot to discuss if we want this to work,” he said.

“Probably. Being king doesn't help,” Laios answered, “But let's worry about that in the morning. I just wanna sleep with you now.”

Kabru squeezed him tightly, nuzzling his neck again, breath against his pulse, speaking softly.

“You should phrase that differently–I could go for another round.”

Locking Kabru in a hold, Laios fell back on the bed.

“You're insatiable! Let me rest!” 

They laughed together for a minute as Kabru broke the hold and got up to put out the candles. Laios yawned deeply, and got under the covers, and made space for Kabru. He pushed a pillow over for him. When Kabru climbed into bed, he laid face to face with Laios.

He looked so beautiful in the moonlight, soft and happy, and his eyes seemed to sparkle. Being with Kabru made him happy, even if they didn't always understand one another. He could trust him, and he felt like Kabru trusted him too. He wanted to kiss him again, fall asleep close that way. So he did. They lay curled around each other, lost in dreams.

All that mattered that night was that they wanted each other's company: Everything else could wait.

#the compendium #labru #kabru #laios touden

[dykesagainstgojo]

geto suguru, gojo satoru, and fatalism

im here once again with a long rant that i didnt really bother to reread. if you squint you can see it as a jujutsu kaisen 0 analysis. theres a part where i talk about geto in what can be seen as someone presenting passive suicidal thoughts, but its neither heavy nor explicitly about that so. just warning.

lately ive been thinking a lot about geto being left alone to do whatever he wanted for 10 years because gojo, the only person strong enough to defeat him, simply never tracked him down. almost as a consequence, i eventually put this together with the fact that, even though yuta was the one who did the "difficult" part of defeating geto, gojo was the one to deliver the final blow

one of the first things geto said after seeing gojo in that alley was "to think you'd be the one here at my end", but lately, i cant help but think: wasnt that actually the most obvious end? was there ever any other option of closure for them? and ive been into the idea of stsg + tragedy (as a genre) since i wrote this post, so this somehow resulted in me looking at them with some kind of lazy fatalistic lens

i really like stories where the character tries to flee from an imminent tragedy, but always goes back to the same place, because that is his fate. and, to me, this is exactly what happened with gojo when he tried to avoid killing geto. he didnt go after him, he spent 10 years standing still, believing the distance would be enough to run away from that moral duty

and then geto came back

and then geto went after gojo students. and then geto was the one who made their meeting happen. and then geto was the one who broke that barrier gojo had put up to avoid thinking about that unhealed wound. suddenly gojo was back to shinjuku, ten years ago, with geto saying that killing him or letting him go was his choice and that there would be a meaning to it

and i keep asking myself what was going on in his mind at that moment when geto appeared at jujutsu high? did he acknowledge that irony? did he acknowledge how that seemed like a bad joke being played on him? how long did it take for him to accept what that meant? was it in the classroom, after their talk, looking at the sunset and thinking about how they were actually quite similar to yuta and rika? changing the place of their conversation to the middle of the street, the same place where rika died her premature death? did he think about how they were also stuck at each other, cursed by love, and how the one who placed the curse must be the one to remove it? how, as said by the novel, the curse of geto suguru was a burden only he would be able to carry?

and this whole thing also made me think about geto. we know for a fact he thought that their friendship was over, that he wasnt someone gojo held dear anymore. we also know he thought gojo deserved to hate him, to curse him, to not take that last meeting of theirs and waste it treating him kindly so, to geto, what justified the fact that gojo never found him? i genuinely dont have a theory. im not even sure if i have a hypothesis that is in any way backed up by canon. but, what i can say almost for sure is that he never got it right. and him thinking gojo and him were best friends is proof of that

then the question thats left is: was geto ever aware of the tragic irony of his death by gojos hands? was dying by gojos hands ever a tragedy from his perspective? the way he never put up a fight against that possibility says otherwise. looking at his ideals, living a meaningless life seems a far more tragic thing for him. but wasnt that what he was doing already? doing his best for a goal he knew made no sense? whenever i think about geto saying he didnt expect gojo to be the one there at his end, i cant help but wonder: was that said in a positive way? was that a surprisingly satisfactory means to go? being killed by the person who cursed him and also the person he loved the most; to geto, was there a more meaningful death than that?

#jjk #satosugu #also yeah i know yuki would put up a good fight against geto since she was also a special grade but come on #i cant think of a single argument that would convince her to buy this fight #and also. its pretty much canon gojo was the only one from the four special grades to be above geto so. #jujutsu kaisen #gojo satoru #geto suguru

[randomwriteronline]

To the man that is claimed to be looking for me.

My name is Ingo, warden of Sneasler, Lady of the Mo. I shall be very earnest in my writing, and as concise as my long-winded nature allows me to be: seeing the means through which your message has been relayed to me, I highly doubt of your existence.

If you were, indeed, a real person - not a ruse or a fabrication of sorts - I would pity the choice of your herald, as he has shown to be unreliable when expressing his honest intentions, witholding information about them or very plainly not stating them. As such, I cannot take his word as is.

I do not expect a response. If I do get one, my cautionsess will assume it is yet another trick; the work of your chosen messenger. If you do recieve these harsh words, I deeply apologize. I simply cannot risk raising hopes in this situation.

Kind regards. Almighty Palkia be with you.

-

To who I doubt is my brother.

I am Emmet. I recieved the letter. I understand. I don’t trust my messenger either. I think he wrote your letter to trick me. He would have no reason to be so mean to himself, but I don’t know how his mind works. I don’t care. If he did write it he will read this and know I know. Maybe he’ll keep writing. I don’t care.

I miss my brother a lot and he knows, so he definitely will use that against me if he has some motive. It’s nice thinking he might actually keep his word and I’m writing to my brother. Not that nice that I’m being so rude after so much time.

Goodbye.

-

To the man that is claimed to be looking for me.

If you do exist, I am sorry to hear about your brother. I hope your separated tracks will merge once again soon, and the two of you will be able to reunite into a single double-car train at your station at the end of the line. I wish you the best of luck.

Kind regards. Almighty Palkia be with you and bless your search.

-

To who I doubt is my brother.

You’re very nice. Thank you.

I read the first letter again. I looked up Sneasler. It’s an extinct Pokémon from Sinnoh. So you would be in old Sinnoh. He’s told me as much. He said you’re a warden and you wrote that too. I still don’t think you’re real.

I don’t know what Palkia is. But thank you for that too.

Goodbye.

-

To the man that is claimed to be looking for me.

Palkia is - if professor Laventon is right - what is called a ‘legendary’ Pokémon, personification of and ruling over space. The Pearl Clan has venerated them as theirour deity and creator of Hisui - the ‘old Sinnoh’ you speak of. I have heard rumors of a change in name for the region, in honor of its true creator deity, as its name (Sinnoh) and role were erroneously assigned to both Palkia and a sibling legendary of sort, Dialga ruler of time.

It saddens me to hear that my lady’s kind is no longer with you in the supposed future in which you live. She is very dear to me.

If it can help, though I am not sure of how it could, I still doubt of your existence as well.

Kind regards. Almighty Palkia be with you.

-

To that motherfucker.

trains arrived in hisui in 1910 and hisuian sneasles were already turning from fighting to dark type by then you son of a bitch i fucking knew it you dumb fucker you think i cant open a damn history book? you said he didnt remember shit. you said he didnt remember shit but you know how we speak and you had to make it as close as possible and you forgot he couldnt have known trains were a thing by then. you almost got me because im used to it. well not anymore. dont ever talk to me ever again. slide another letter under my door and im going to burn it.

go to hell you fucking piece of shit.

-

To the man that is claimed to be looking for me.

You seem exceptionally upset.

As I mentioned, your messenger is untrustworthy and prone to witholding important information. In this case, however, it has proved directly unhelpful to whatever goals he had if he wanted to manipulate you, and has put me in an equally embarassing situation.

I was the one to warn you of his words, wasn’t I? And while you immediately noticed how strange it would be for him to start off his fake correspondence with such a harsh judgement of himself, now that would be an easy way to explain the fallacy in his retelling: because he did not tell you the whole story, I, as the primary source he made up, would and could easily correct him.

So how can I assure you I am real, now that you have proof otherwise?

I know I am. I know I am writing these letters. I do not know to whom, if to Emmet or to nobody, mere pawn in a scheme I know nothing about, though I do hope at this point that you are real.

I do not remember my life as it was before Hisui, that much is true - I have no idea where I came from or if I had any family. But despite this, I still have managed to recall some things, minuscule memories: words of a vocabulary I can’t say I fully understand (since, as you noted, their subject hasn’t come to Hisui), a partner Pokémon which lead through the darkest night, something of machines which are hidden, a man with my likeness who I cared for. Is that you?

I don’t know what will become of this letter. I want to prove my existence but I have no way to do so. I don’t even know if I should trust your outburst as much as I want to believe it’s honest. I hope I’m I hope I a I

Almighty Palkia be with you.

-

To to Ingo To who I hope is not a trick.

I burnt twenty-seven letters. He slid them under the door for a month. They were all copies of yours. He was worried I wouldn’t have read it. I read a copy first; then he gave me the original. He used completely different paper from yours. And he signed the number of the copy on the papers. That’s how I know they were twenty-seven.

His handwriting is nothing like yours. I forced him to write and he couldn’t do it. Not even if I didn’t look. So. I guess you are real.

I am terrified. If you are, I yelled at you. If you aren’t, I am getting manipulated. No win.

I need you to be real so badly you have no idea.

I put an image of me here. I’m not in uniform. So you know it’s not just a drawing over an image of you. If you look like that. We have solved the mystery.

Please be real.

Goodbye.

-

To my brother

(the letter is covered in ink splotches that make it illegible, and half crumpled. A photograph from an extremely old portable photocamera is wrapped within it.)

-

(the letter seems to have been heavily wet and later halphazardly left to dry up. Tearstains smudge every single word and make it illegible.)

-

[Emmet laughed when he saw him in person. He laughed and started coughing to try and not cry. Ingo held his face in his hands and shouted that they were so alike and then burst into tears. Volo looked at them crumble on each other like a badly made house of cards and felt a little lighter.]

#pokémon #submas #submas ingo #submas emmet #pokemon volo #pokemon legends arceus #random writing #epistolary fic babeyyyy #it could definitely be longer. then again! what the hell would they talk about #volo has been living for a long time and thought man its fucked up i just did that to some guy #hes trying to make up for it like #honestly! genuinely! no second motive. none. #bbut of course. hes not trusted. and i mean. can you blame them #volo himself is like. yeah fair ive shamelessly lied and manipulated the people i knew and actively attempted to rewrite the world #hes trying tho! hes had a long time to think as i said

[typho-draws]

Can you drop some Fred lore??? I'm rlly curious

hi hi yeas sure!! info under da cut. i wrote a bit more than i expectedddd. i tried splitting it up as best i could.

**cw/tw for unreality dealing with death, alcohol**

ok it'll be a little all over the place and i'll give the bare bones because it's a lot. he's a dude that i like fitting into maaaany universes (like most my dudes) but i'll explain the two main ones.

-----------------------

**CW/TW alcohol**

basic info bout fred: he's a 30 something year old fruity german guy who is, unfortunately, a werecat. fred's got a lot of mental disorder type issues (for example he every now and then has explosive self-destructive episodes.) both bc of past stuff and the whole... werecat thing... he uuuused to have a really bad drinking issue, but it's not as bad now.

**END OF ALCOHOL STUFF**

his personality type is mostly quiet and solitary. he can talk to people if he wants to/needs to, but prefers being alone. he loves being helpful when he can and is def a problem-solver. fred also cares deeply for others even if he generally seems distant!! very righteous guy too who will take matters into his own hands. big initiative taker.

-----------------------

**BRIEF WERECAT STUFF**

the whole werecat thing isn't something he was like... 'infected' with. i have a couple sketch pages i intend to pretty up and post at some point explaining ailuranthropy. it's either an infection thing or genetic thing. FOR FRED it's like a recessive hereditary disorder that was forced out by like. human interference if that makes sense? ailuranthropy's not necessarily cyclical with full moon phases either. it *can* be by coincidence, but in fred's case it can happen at random sometimes (or on different phases.) say... 80% of the time he's on a schedule with it; the other 20% are the fun moments when he least expects it!!! yippeee!!!!!

and when he's shifted to werecat, fred's like a hungry rabid animal. and it's always a 50/50 waking up to something regrettable (cough cough dead people cough. or ending up on the news somehow as a "panther-like creature.")

ANYWAYS yea he has a lot of issues :-D!!!!!!

-----------------------

OKAY. TIMELINES.

#1 ----- the major timeline i think of and have thought about a lot started sometime early highschool? maybe earlier?? in this universe (and the other) fred's kind of like... an anomaly. and there's tons of other people in his same circumstance (with or without the whole werecat problem.)

**CW: UNREALITY /W DEATH** to make a long story short, fred was born quite a bit ago! give or take a hundred or so years. he ended up dying (bc of someone else who's an evil asshole and who also shows up again later on) but some weird shit happens where he comes-to in a different time and place. it's kind of like that theory people have where if u perish in one universe, your consciousness or something will pick up in another (and u dont actually die die.)

HOWEVER he still has some good memory of pre-death stuff. as time goes on it's less and less on his mind (although it does come up in... usually valid outbursts.) he has to readjust to the timeline he's in too.

IT'S MORESO LIKE... death and time travel and not necessarily death + completely different universe (like alien environments or sumn. or soooo far forward into the future that humans dont exist no more.) it's kinda like donnie darko type stuff (not directly inspired, but that's something i can think off the top my head that has a similar time thing going on.)

** END OF UNREALITY STUFF**

in THIS universe thingy he starts off having to skip town to town because of stupid werecat incidents. eventually he ends up in a little town (US east coast baby!) that he hasn't had any issues in... yet.

i like to think he probably works as a university philosophy + history professor (adjunct probs) or something in that field. the past towns he was in will have been other jobs... probably not to that level of profession though. my thought process for him being able to land that job (or any really) was that lev (another oc of mine who i MUST make more art of) would help fred forge shit bc lev coming across him was like "OMG HEY I KNOW YOUUU!!!!" from waaay back pre-death time. and wanted to help him! but that also means he's back to gleefully annoy fred 😭

-----------------------

#2 ---- the second timeline type thing was one i thought up with my bf a handful of years ago. still the same death and time switch type thing except he ends up like. way further in the future. he's all nasty and smelly like a dirty sad little stray and the luckiest thing happens to him. world's richest ginger named alfie finds the loser sitting all alone by himself and takes him in <3 and then they get married (yaaay!)

-----------------------

tbh if i were to start a project of sorts with fred, which i have seriously thought about since early highschool, i'd prob go off of timeline #1. i have other ideas and dudes for that story too other than fred. i'm going to start animating (or trying to) a bunch of things having to deal with him. i have an amv/pmv cooking thats like. 7 minutes long. that i HOPE to be able to work on again soon :-p

THANK YOU FOR ASKING ABOUT HIM AND THANK YOU FOR READING!!!!!!!!!! i tried condensing it down as much i could ; _ ;!!

#fred #not art #anon #cw death #cw unreality #cw alcohol #tagging just in case people need that *salute* #i'm not great at writing sorry i think in pictures not word :-( #i love talking bout my guys tho!!! ima messy writer unfortunately u_u #my ocs

[lanawinterscigarettes]

A Natasha scenario you could do is the reader's car stalls in a snow storm and our lovely Russian woman comes to the rescue with her own warm car ! Who knows, hope this helps your want to write :)

This actually helped with my writer's block a lot <3 I dont have my driver's license yet and I have very little knowledge on how cars work so I kept putting it off to get this finished because I'm worried something I wrote was inaccurate but oh well (also I'm literally posting this during spring. Really wishing it was still cold enough to snow right about now sigh)

Car Trouble (Natasha Romanoff x reader)

Warnings: swearing, mention of snowstorms, car trouble ig?? (Idk if those could be considered as warnings but better safe than sorry)

"Shit," you said as your car suddenly stopped, not wanting to go any farther no matter how hard you slammed your foot on the gas. "Oh, come on." You turned your keys in the ignition a few times, trying to get it to work, but it was no use. Your car sputtered before giving out a sad, strangled choking sound, and that was it. It was clear at that point your car was dead, and you were screwed.

"Well, that's just great," you muttered. You thought about maybe using the jumper cables you usually kept in the trunk of your car to give it a well needed boost of energy before remembering you'd taken it out the day before, needing the extra space for the groceries you'd needed to pick up. Of course the one time you needed it was the one time it wasn't there.

Sighing, you pulled out your phone to double check the forecast for the day. It was currently 30° and dropping, indicating the snow storm you weren't expecting to receive until next week was going to be arriving early.

"Wonderful." You were stuck in your car, about to be hit by a massive snow storm, groceries in the back, no jumper cable, and your phone was at seven percent. No one you knew would have the time to just drop everything and come pick you up, except for maybe one person; your girlfriend.

You quickly dialed her number and sat there anxiously as it rang. When she didn't answer the first time, you called again, hoping she would pick up. Then, on the third ring, she did.

"Hello?"

"Nat! Oh, thank God," you breathed out a sigh of relief. "Look, my phone's about to die, so I don't have much time to say what I need to say, but my car's being a dick, I don't have the jumper cables on me, and I'm pretty sure the snow storm predicted for next week is coming early. Please send help," you fake pleaded, only half joking.

The other end was silent, causing you to think maybe your phone had already died until you heard shuffling and the distinct sound of jingling keys on the other end. "I'm on my way. Text me where you're at if you can, if not, Friday has GPS systems installed in our cars for a reason."

"Oh my God, Nat, you're the best. Thank you."

You could hear the smirk in her voice as she gave her response. "Don't thank me yet."

Less than twenty minutes later, you heard the familiar rumbling of a car engine as Natasha's car pulled up beside yours. "Hey stranger," she said as she got out.

"Natasha!" You felt a tremendous amount of relief as she got out the jumper cables and made her way over to you.

"I'm gonna pop the hood so I can get this done and we can go home."

You watched as she tinkered with the stuff under the hood of your car for a couple minutes before giving you the go ahead to try to turn it on.

You gleefully honked on the horn as your car suddenly roared to life, causing Natasha to shoot you a dirty look. "That was my ear you just honked in."

"Sorry babe, my bad." You gave her a sheepish grin as you got out of your car and went to stand behind her. You wrapped your arms around her waist and squeezed. "Thank you so much for helping me with this today."

"Of course, I couldn't just leave you out here to freeze." She turned around to face you after shutting the hood of the car. "I've got to get back, but make sure you get home safe, okay?"

"Don't worry, I will." You gave her a quick kiss before getting back in the car. "I love you," you called out before shutting the door.

Waving to her as she drove away, you put on your seatbelt and got started on the drive back home.

~

Taglist: @anxiously-sad @iloveentrapta @ghot-girl @taecube @blkroyalty1 @nevilleismywhore @multiyfandomgirl40 @xxromanoffxx @your-next-daydream

#mcu #mcu imagines #mcu imagine #mcu x reader #mcu fic #mcu fluff #marvel #marvel imagines #marvel imagine #marvel x reader #marvel fic #marvel fluff #marvel cinematic universe #natasha romanoff imagines #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff fic #natasha romanoff fluff #avengers #avengers imagines #avengers imagine #avengers x reader #avengers fic #avengers fluff

[red-might-be-dead]

You should theoretically use this ask as an excuse to ramble about the prince au👁️👁️

Theoretically

tigers101? THE fnc guy? in MY asks? what a day

(i totally didn't spend ten minutes screaming at my beta reader about this, nope, nuh uh (she says hello))

heads up im pretty sure im a shitty writer so dont expect too much from this fic lmaoo

as of right now the au doesnt have a name (weeps and cries) i have only ever named one of my wip fics well and it took like two months (weeps and cries AGAIN)

the whole au is set across their lifetime from 7-9 to 25-30 (possibly to older if i do an epilogue who knows) and its probably going to contain a lot of my attempts to be funny, as well as my attempts to be romantic and angsty, we'll see what happens!

i have only written one chapter so far, its about 2k words that i wrote in one night and then edited in two (its a blur, dont ask). its set when the albatrio are around 8 and their older siblings (Ava, Lizzie and Edyn) are around 14-15. maybe all of the chapters will be about 2k words? i might fizzle out and die though so... then again i have a 10k wip in my drive that was supposed to be multi chapter, i dont know if i will ever publish that lmaoo

i think most of the fic will be in chips pov since i feel like i write him the best, maybe some gill pov?? jay pov even?? who knows! not me thats for sure!

it wont only have fnc in it, it actually has more waning crescent in it as of the first chapter. i think it should have some clockwork rivals as well!!

i might not even finish it though, but ive had like a fuck ton of support for it over the last few days which is MENTAL, like i haven't even started it yet, where did you all come from???

also expect british spellings. i am sorry. i might have to use the word mum. or colour. im so sorry.

i dont really have much else to say about it other than the fact it's plot was though up during a three hour car journey and there is like an unconventional arranged marriage trope??? i don't even know if im using that word correctly but im to sleepy to care.

also the entire google doc is in multicoloured comic sans because i am incapable of taking myself seriously, goodnight :D!!

#asks #jrwi fnc #jrwi riptide #red rambles relentlessly #this time about my fic!!

[monstersinthecosmos]

🤲💋✨️💝💌

(writing asks!)

🤲what do YOU get out of writing?

OMG I DONT KNOW! Like why do creative people feel the need to make stuff, I can't explain it. I just know that it's what I want to do as a creative outlet. And like usually (NOT LATELY BECAUSE THE LAST COUPLE MONTHS MY LIFE HAS BEEN A DISASTER) I reserve 9-10pm every night as WRITING TIME and like, it's not a chore for me! It's like a reward at the end of the day. So I spend all day thinking about what I'll write at 9pm when it's writing time. :D So there's like the half of it that's creative & spiritual to do, and also the half that's just like, my little Me Time that I allow myself that helps me unwind. :D

💋when you leave comments on a fic, do you want to hear back from the writer?

I DO but I don't get offended if they don't reply lol. But like ngl, if I notice a fic author doesn't reply to comments, I am less likely to leave a huge comment. Like one time I left a BOOK REPORT on a fic and the author replied to like, everyone EXCEPT me who was leaving emojis and stuff? And I felt really bad like I made them uncomfortable or something. So like. I tend to comment as I read and I like to copy & paste lines in and stuff, but if the author never replies I'm less likely to take the extra time to do this because I don't know if it's well received. 😅

✨What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

jkgald wording it like that makes me squeamish but I felt like the gangbang fic I wrote for the BDSM zine kinda flopped 😬 like it has some comments and people who did comment were really excited but like, proportionally to my other Sheith fics it didn't do well. And I wasn't sure if it was like TOO MUCH or something, bc it got a lot of hits but not so many comments, like it made me wonder if people opened the link out of curiosity but then noped out. Like I have Sheith fics with less hits that have 2 or 3x the comments. Whoops! And I wonder if I overcomplicated it. IDK!!!!!!!!!! But I was happy with how it came out so it's not necessarily that I would want to like fix or anything. I just felt sad that no one liked it. 😂

💝what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

I think maybe The Front ? I was a little overwhelmed by the response bc I thought I was being like extremely self indulgent and niche about my own kinks and people wound up being like SO excited and kind and generous with comments it just really surprised me. 😳 LIKE YOU DONT EVEN LEARN KEITH'S NAME FOR 21K, I was calling him "the creature" LMAOOOOOOOOOOO it just was like so extremely catered to my own individual needs I was surprised. 😂

💌share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

For Sheith right now I'm back to working on my fic Tonight the Stars Revolt! which is like a retelling of canon if they were friends with benefits who kept fooling around after near death missions to relieve stress and like I WROTE THE FIRST 50K IN A MONTH on my break after my first ship contract and I didn't intend for it to get so complicated and plotty and I also absolutely did not intend for the last few chapters to be like A YEAR APART FROM EACH OTHER but I kept getting distracted doing exchanges and stuff, and I kinda try to like alternate Sheith and VC so I'd write a chapter, then write a VC fic, then it was time to go back to Sheith but I had an exchange, then VC, then a zine, then VC, etc. It just really got away from me but like it's my baby and it's where I pour all my meta and headcanons and I think about it constantly so every time I return to it I'm very exciting! The upcoming chapter includes a flashback about BABY KEITH and his DAD and a SNAKE and I'm really excited about it. :)

FOR VC IM FOAMING AT THE MOUTH OBSESSING OVER WRITING A FIC ABOUT THE YEAR MARIUS WAS HELD CAPTIVE AND THE SEXUAL TENSION BETWEEN HIM AND HIS CAPTOR AND THE STAGES OF GRIEF FOR HIS FREEDOM, I hope to start writing it maybe in the new year hdkjslgasgdjal I can't stop thinking about it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[yarrayora]

end of the year book stuff tagged by @carriagelamp

How many books did you read this year?

does comic books count? if yes then i didn't count, if no then i'm pretty sure just two (but comics should absolutely count btw)

Did you reread anything? What?

i always reread servamp all the time so i can write Essays. also i reread katekyo hitman reborn for nostalgia and crossover reasons. TECHNICALLY i reread dante's inferno even though i never finished it because i'm not used to classic so i have to repeat the paragraphs before Getting it

What were your top five books of the year?

GIDEON THE NINTH!!! also Superman Smashes the Klan. the rest of the top 5 is servamp, unfortunately

Did you discover any new authors that you love this year?

if i have never read tamsyn muir's homestuck fic before then it would have been her, but because i have that means she's an old fave-- oH i guess ryohgo narita counts? i knew he wrote durarara but i never truly managed to appreciate his writing until i read dead mount deathplay

What genre did you read the most of?

fantasy, duh

Was there anything you meant to read, but never got to?

too like a lightning by ada palmer. i keep forgetting i already have an e-book of it

What was your average Goodreads rating? Does it seem accurate?

i dont use goodreads thumbs up emoji

Did you meet any of your reading goals? Which ones?

yeah, finally reading original novels again. im trying to beat my ADHD so i can devour books the way i did during childhood

Did you get into any new genres?

new genre huh uhhhh... no. i know what i like

What was your favorite new release of the year?

i don't follow new release i just browse the bookstores and hope something speaks to me

What was your favorite book that has been out for a while, but you just now read?

gideon the ninth

Any books that disappointed you?

i dropped a lot of books and nothing this year has disappointed me enough for me to remember their titles

What were your least favorite books of the year?

bungou stray dogs look the light novels are still REALLY well written. i also appreciate how beautiful the translation can be. but the canon storyline fucking sucks. it betrays its theme when it comes to handling abusers by making this little girl who gets physically abused by her dad as a form of discipline to look up to him as a hero because dad's a cop

What books do you want to finish before the year is over?

i don't care about something like that

Did you read any books that were nominated for or won awards this year (Booker, Women’s Prize, National Book Award, Pulitzer, Hugo, etc.)? What did you think of them?

i don't follow book awards either

What is the most over-hyped book you read this year?

i tried reading blue lock and it's the worst sports manga i have ever read. i can't get over how stupid the premise is. soccer is a team sport you idiot (note that this book didnt disappoint me because i never had any expectations for it in the first place)

Did any books surprise you with how good they were?

oh yeah JK Haru is a Sex Worker in Another World. I went into it expecting a cheap smutty story but turns out it's a pretty feminist narrative about sex workers and how no matter talented a woman is as long as the environment around her is aggressively and violently patriarchal those talents that would make men a hero would make women accused as demons-- but that's okay because you don't need the power to slay an entire army to change the world. sometimes, eating at a cafe in a world where women arent allowed to go outside without a chaperone is more revolutionary than magic that can burn a horde of monsters into cinders

How many books did you buy?

more than five

Did you use your library?

there is no usable library around me

What was your most anticipated release? Did it meet your expectations?

i dont follow new release remember

Did you participate in or watch any booklr, booktube, or book twitter drama?

oh yeh i watch them from the sideline with popcorn and all, thats crazy

What’s the longest book you read?

dante's inferno

What’s the fastest time it took you to read a book?

back when i was a kid i read three pjo books in one day. i don't do that anymore

Did you DNF anything? Why?

i read reeeeeeally slow now so it's less not finishing and more like taking long breaks inbetween

What reading goals do you have for next year?

finish gideon the ninth so i can read the next one

#yarra speaks

[stitchkiss]

hey, love! can u answer all of them?

WHAT DO YOU MEAN ALL OF THEM!!!!! okay i will do it but only because you asked and i love you very much

✨What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

well i only have 5 fics posted but probably this one because it’s my longest fic but i didn’t really expect a lot of recognition anyway because it’s a rare pair from a show that not many ppl like. it's not the best writing but worked hard on it and i’m proud of it and that’s really all i can ask for.

💫what is your favorite kind of comment/feedback?

i really love when ppl point out sentences/situations and other things they like.

🌈is there a fic that you worked *really fucking hard on* that no one would ever know? maybe a scene/theme you struggled with?

i struggled really hard with my first thiam fic. the responses are all amazing but i found it so difficult to write something so vulnerable

🌻what makes you want to give up on writing? what makes you keep going?

something that makes me want to give up is the fear that i wont be able to write how i want. what keeps me going is all the lovely cheerleaders in my corner<333

🌿how does creating make you feel?

happy. i love getting my ideas out there and i like practicing writing

🍉in what ways has writing helped you process trauma and/or navigate through your own life?

tbh what i've written so far have all been fantasies. i haven't explored issues i face through writing yet but i do have ideas. i think my thiam stargazing fic was a kind of reflection of how i felt in a moment

🎀give yourself a compliment about your own writing

im funny sometimes

🎈describe your style as a writer; is it fixed? does it change?

there are literally year long gaps between my fics so yes they def have changed. i feel like im more sure of myself and my writing each time i post and hopefully my writing gets better every time too!

🎉how often do you celebrate completing & posting a work? how often do you give yourself the credit/ validation that you seek from others when you post? (if you don't, you should!)

every time. i love treating myself. i try to hype myself up by reading what i wrote and it works sometimes.

💞what's the most important part of a story for you? the plot, the characters, the worldbuilding, the technical stuff (grammar etc), the figurative language

all of these ofc but i think characters because they're the driving force of all my writing amd im scared i dont write them correctly or they dont come off in the way i want to. i also feel like specific word choices and phrases really make or break a fic.

💝what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

the thiam stargazing one. you guys went nuts over it fr so thanks

🤍what's one fic of yours you think people didn't "get"?

i havent written anything really profound but i will say that there is a lot in my 18k caswen fic that i wish ppl would acknowledge.

🕯️I was there a fic that was really hard on you to write, or took you to a place you didn't think it would take you?

thiam stargazing ofc. when i wrote it i felt like i was bigger than myself. idk how to explain it

💥find your least kudos'd fic - say something wonderful about it.

ohhh my anne/winnie fic! i will say that this was very bold of me to write because this pair is rare. so rare in fact that my fic was the first posted on a03 for that ship! pretty girlboss of me

🍭why did you start writing?

because i had ideas in my head and i needed to get them out.

💎why is writing important to you?

i think it's important to me because this is a way for me to take a break from my life by writing others'

🪄what is your post-writing/sharing aftercare? How do you take care of yourself or celebrate yourself when you've finished a fic?

every single time i've posted a work i eat chinese food then take a phat nap to distract myself.

🎙️which one of your fics would you like someone to make a pod-fic of?

probably the thiam cod one bc it's funny

🤲what do YOU get out of writing?

i like contributing to fandoms and ships and if i get praised along the way then that's alright with me too

💋when you leave comments on a fic, do you want to hear back from the writer?

ur comments on my comment. did i understand it? did you think what i said ab x thing was funny? idk everything. im a social butterfly i thrive off communication

☯️how do you think engaging with each other through tumblr, twitter, comments, kudos, creates healthy fandom experiences? How do you deal with that if you're not a social person/experience social anxiety?

encouragement literally creates art. and friendships! i literally made so many friends by commenting on their fics and interacting with them in general. fr this has been a very fun two months for me inthe teen wolf/thiam fandom. im thriving here in a way i didnt in other fandoms because i actually took a chance and talked to ppl. i have aniety but i love talking to ppl so it worked out

🦕(i can’t find the stupid blue emoji thing so ur getting a dinosaur) what steps do you take to not take things personally if a fic doesn't do well, or if your writing/ posting/sharing experience isn't going how you'd like it to?

if my fic doesnt do well then that's not my business. ppl like what they like and yeah it's a dick move to not tell a creator/artist you like their stuff whether through comments or kudos bc its so east to click one little button before swiping out of the tab but! the real ones have my back and i know it. i dont expect a lot when i post for thiam because the show ended literally five years ago and this ship is relatively small compared to others so i dont think much of it. if my fic doesnt do well its not on me because i know i did good

💌share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

mmm okay i know i posted a wip game last week but i only did half so i'll drop the other half here (this is a treat specifically for you jaque).

cuddle monster liam: liam is a leech and he clings to theo when they sleep. theo's a little confused but accepts it anyway. i have this scene i want to write and it's one of the first times liam cuccled with him and it the basic part of it is liam just nudges his head under theos arm like a puppy and nuzzles his face into theo's chest bc he's cold.

look you: this is more of a concept than anything but basically theo and liam have thing thing where they say "look, you" or some kind of variation of that when the other is being a little shit or self depreciating.

tfw you do a 30 day relationship challenge when ur not even in a relationship: so corey and mason do a 30 day relationship challenge and they rope theo and liam into doing it too. i got the challenge off some website and i was like yes. there's gonna be 31 parts in theory but they wont be super long i think. i need all the creative juices going for this one.

getting shot with an arrow had never been this fun: theo and liam are complete idiots and they manage to get impaled with the SAME arrow and are stuck together for Reasons. it's shenanigan city up in here as they navigate how to get help. the important thing is that they have fun !

the morey split: mason and corey break up (or take a break or just arent talking i havent decided yet) and its up to theo and liam to get to the bottom of this and get them back together! they are terrible at it.

okay i think im done now

#this is sort of long so if i need to put some of it behind a keep reading tab i will just lmk #ask #stitchkiss

[bonesandthebees]

I have absolutely no idea if i sent this ask or not, bc i know i meant to but i also know that I have opened this app multiple times with the ask bar open and then closing it and forgetting about it 😭😭

So ignore this one if i have already sent it, and if not then hi LMAO

I saw a post on my feed about Mermay with a different fandom and it reminded me of your fic "what the water gave me" which is still one of my all time fav one shots Ever

Like genuinely, it gave me so many more emotions than I was expecting from a simple mermaid fic and aaaaa

You're honestly one of the few authors I'll read pretty much anything from. Like before you, I'd never had Any interest in mermaid fics, at all hahaha. Like i didnt have a problem with them!!! But they weren't really my thing? And then what the water gave me comes along and i was like "yknow what, let's give it a try. It's bee's writing so I'm sure I'll love it." And yeah, I fucking loved it.

Ooohh my god, it's still one of the most emotional reads of my life, I DONT EVEN KNOW WHY BUT JUST... WILBUR BEING ACCEPTED INTO THEIR FAMILY:((( WILBUR FINDING OUT HE *IS* FAMILY, HOLYSHIT BRO IT DESTROYS ME EVERY TIME

The click scene is still one of the cutest things ive ever read HOLYSHITJSJDKFKFKSKD

And honestly i was like "maybe i was just feeling extra emotional that day" BC I LITERALLY CRIED... LOTS OF TEARS... WHILE READING IT and yeah no, i reread it and while i didnt cry as much, i still cried. It's such a good fic rahhh

I also have great memories of it now lmfao bc my friend and i were both using the fic react channel at the same time, and i was crying over found family and he was crying over the fic guided evolution which had dream being evil and stuff LMFAOOO, Two VERY different emotions happening in the chat hahaha

These are still some of my fav screenshots ever LMFAO (pfp art by wolfythewitch^-^)

But yeahhh, now im gonna go reread it again. And cry, again. Love ur works bee!!!

awww this is so sweet thank you icyfox!! tbh I love what the water gave me so much. I came up with it and wrote it in a few days near the end of may last year, and it's still one of my favs to go back and reread

it means so much to hear that you'll try out fics you're not sure if you'll like just bc i wrote them. like that's seriously one of the highest compliments i feel like i can get as an author. i'm so happy you enjoy my writing so much :D

the clicking scene!! god I had so much fun writing that. still one of the best ideas I've had imo

I didn't think anyone would cry omg!! hope your eyes were ok after that lol

tysm!! this reminded me I have to brainstorm for mermay since it's may again and I have zero mer ideas currently... uh oh guess we'll have to wait and see if i can come up with something again

#ask #icyfox17 #what the water gave me

[jjstein2]

i dont know if ive mentioned this before, but jackie and jameson have a short list of "rules" that both of them follow within their dom/sub relationship. this is mostly for jameson. he told jackie that yes, he would really be interested in a relationship like this, but he is very very anxious that he will be disobedient in some way, or do something wrong in jackies eyes. because with anti, there were always these unspoken little rules that they had where if jameson did something wrong to anti, he would be in big, big trouble. even if he didnt know he wasnt supposed to touch anti's knives. even if he didnt know what anti wanted for supper. even if he didnt know the rules that anti randomly made up for jameson to break so he could hurt him.

so jackie decided that having a set, clear list of rules for jameson to follow would help guide him in their bdsm relationship, and would alleviate a lot of jameson's anxiety about the whole thing. safety and communication is jackies biggest priorities here. so he wrote it out, sat down with jameson, and told him to read off all the rules to him aloud so jackie could explain them and ask for feedback.

rule #1 is that jameson is not allowed to say sorry. he is not allowed to apologize without jackie's permission. this bothers jameson at first because he is VERY apologetic, all the time. which is the point of not being allowed to say it unless jackie tells him to. a big part of what jackie wants for jameson is to build his confidence and make him less self-depricating and uncaring for himself. so essentially making him not constantly fawn is part of that.

rule #2 is that jameson will make jackies bed every day. and he is not expected to do anything else. one thing that jameson does all the time as well is do chores around jackie and chase's flat. which is all fine with them, until jameson has a bad day and doesnt get to doing all the dishes or vacuuming, which he has literally had panic attacks over. again, he had expectations with anti, and when they were broken even the slightest, he was punished. so this is both a rule that cements jameson's role as jackie's submissive who does things for him obediently, and also makes sure that he knows hes not expected to do every chore in the house all the time with having only 1 small expectation.

rule #3 is that if jameson wants something, he needs to ask for it. along these lines, if jameson needs something, he is required to ask for it as well. if he is tired, he will tell jackie. if he is hungry, he will say something. if he wants sex, or cuddling, or attention, he is going to have to ask for it. this is sort of an obedience and master/servant kind of thing, but also. jameson does not ask for things. ever. he struggles to communicate his needs and wants, and so in this way, jackie can better take care of his boy, and jameson can care for himself in a way.

rule #4 is that jackie expects obedience, but will not ask for more than jameson can give. he wants to push jameson past his limits, but he will never harm him by pushing him too far. this is in place to make their roles clear, but is also jackie promising jameson he will not ask for overly difficult or unrealistic things from him, and punish him when he cant do them.

and rule #5, of course, is that jameson is safe. always, he is safe. this is the most important one for jackie. as a dom, he wants his sub to feel comfortable with him, and wants his trust. and jameson does trust jackie. but jackie wants him to know this more than anything. despite what anti did to him for those years, he's safe with jackie. always. he will never hurt him, never yell, never do anything that isnt consensual or anything forced. hes safe here. always.

#again its a short list but theyre all important #at least to jackie #ego shipping #dapperhero

[souryogurt64]

hey sarah, when fob collaborate with someone, i get that the music is probably hard to put a hard line between who came up with what, but with lyrics is it safe to assume that if it's patrick singing it's probably a fob (pete's) lyric? or is it a case-by-case thing? i know you interview ppl so i figure you know how those processes work better than me, thank youuu <3 also if you dk that's cool ily and your blog!!

i am not sure, but i think pete contributes to a lot of the collabs because they sound like his writing. the guest verses in sunshine riptide and the mighty fall especially just sound like something he would write. i also feel like foxes verse in just one yesterday sounds like him attempting to write from a womans perspective. courtney loves verse sounds like her and not pete, i listen to hole lol

OK i just checked all the credits on all their album booklets and it does say big sean helped with the mighty fall and courtney love helped with rat a tat, and butch walker and john hill helped with my songs but it doesnt say if it was words or music. elton john does not have any writing credits which is unsurprising since i think he had a partner that wrote a lot of his shit. pete and patrick split a lot of TTTYG, they go into detail in the BTS dvd. jay z wrote his intro in thriller which i expected. “waters of nazareth publishing” is credited on wams, i feel like i read once this was a zine or some shit.

i have always loved carpal tunnel but it does not sound like him, thats because he was sued by wes eisold of american nightmare and some girls over it but theyre still friends i think (same with legal drama with sean muttaqi lol). wes eisold is credited for “tear catcher” in i slept with someone and he also helped with golden and bang the doldrums.

someone named carlo montagnese is credited on last of the real ones but again, does not specify music or lyrics. same with jonny coffer on hold me tight or dont. there are 3 other people credited on church and 2 on champion but unclear if music or lyrics. burna boy is not credited on sunshine riptide for music or lyrics so i was also right about that (altho dils has pointed that out as well).

SO i was right about foxes. i knew a real woman would never say that shit that was pete wentz who believes all women are conniving vindictive harpies

also i would bet actual money pete has borrowed from chris at some point but would never publicly admit to it and chris is too in love with him to sue

#also on cork tree it says ‘left off thanks list ‘hey chris’’ bro 😭 #also doobie snacks okeefe lmao #ALSO ‘pete wants to thank his mom’ FREUD WOULD LOVE YOU #also dirty is listed as beer maintenance #lmao

[westywrites]

2012

Rays

In terms of concept, this might be one of my oldest stories. I have notes about these characters and this world from when I was 9 years old! But I didn’t do any actual drafting (that I can find at least) until 2012. That year and the year following, I wrote 16,000 words for this story before giving it a rushed ending and calling it done, even though I was super unsatisfied. For the past few years, I’ve been tinkering around with the story and slowly rewriting it. The concept is a lot of fun, and I still think it would make a great middle grade fantasy.

Excerpt:

"You are members, very special members, of a species called Rays. We, Rays, are a very evolved species made, literally made of, energy from the suns rays, thats why we are called Rays!" Mrs.Petal said matter-of-factly and enthusiastically.

"How does that work?" Ash asked staring at her hands with a strange look on her face as though she was expecting them to explode or something.

"We dont know, that's one of the many mysteries of our kind."Mr.Coal said,"Another mystery is why some are more powerful than others or why some, like all of you, were born into human families. There's just somethings we'll never know and others we cant wait to find out."

"All Rays have a specific power that is uniquely thier own, some powers are similar but none are the same."The Professer said,"The most powerful are rare and special always the kings and queens of our kind, we call them the Potentials. I myself am currently king and it is my jo-"

"You're a king?!?"Esme interrupted withher mouth hanging open like a dead fish staring at The Professer with a look of amazment.

"Yes, but that is completely besides the point, my j-" The Professer started again.

"How can that be besides the point? You're a KING!!!!!" Alexander said with the same look Esme still had on her face. Esme turned towards Alexander and they started going on about some random stuff that I didn't even listen to. I was distracted by the furious look on The Professer/ Kings face.

"WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP FOR JUST ONE SECOND!!!!"The Professer exploded. Esme and Alexander went silent immediately.

"Thank you."The Professer said,"Now where was I? Oh, yes my job. My job, the reason I am here, the reason you are here, is that I am to train the next Potentials to take over when I die. Which shall be soon."

Beings literally made of sunlight. Such a cool concept. Later in the story, I even described how their blood glows (and they glow while blushing, it’s cute). If only I had known how to spell Professor. Or use apostrophes and other punctuation. You can tell this one was just me and not edited/handed in as an English assignment like Monday’s excerpt from 2011.

For the fun of comparison, here is the equivalent scene in the rewrite of Rays (though this is getting somewhat old now itself…) In the rewrite, the exposition is both more detailed and more split up. This was the biggest chunk of it I could find. Definitely better than the long-winded speech the teachers give in the original.

Ms. Petal’s smile was light and dreamy. “I am sure you have often felt out of place. You have felt unloved, unwanted. I assure you that that ends today. We have brought you home to the Castle of the Sun.”

“Please, hear our words and know that they are the truth.” Ms. Crystal stepped forward once more, so she was in the centre of our semicircle. “You are Rays, part of an ancient species that has existed longer than humans have roamed this Earth. Rays are creatures of light and energy, made from the concentrated power of the sun alone. The days ahead of you are not easy, but you have survived until now and will survive long into the future. All will come to make sense in time.” 

“Are you saying we aren’t human?” Esme stood and looked at the teachers with wide eyes. Mr. Coal shot her a look and she suddenly froze, her eyes glazed over slightly and she sat slowly back into her chair. My mouth fell open and I looked at the others to see if they had seen it too. 

“What did you do to her?” Fear marked Gabriel’s face. 

“As we said, we are part of a species called Rays. Each Ray has an ability that is uniquely their own.” Mr. Coal smiled somewhat cruelly. “Mine is that I can influence people to do as I wish.”   

#west's words #writers on tumblr #writeblr #amwriting #westywrites 5 year anniversary celebration #Rays #not sure but i think ive technically posted about it before so it might have a tag #i do love these characters #but in general it's very middle grade #and im not often vibing with writing middle grade when i want to write #so the rewrite is a long and slow process haha

[johnconstantinekissesmen]

7 rebirth spoilers (on chapter 11)

complaining about a few things mostly

do not understand roche coming out all this way to fight cloud, clearly to the death to escape whatever fate is waiting for him, only for the fight to pointlessly end in him magically poofing into new clothes. i mean i get it, i get why the writers did it, scare cloud further. but like why do it this way youre just beating us over the head with a hammer at this point like i fuckin get it (cloud was also already effectively Terrified after what happened with tifa at the last reactor)

it was also just...goofy. like why not Kill Him because he js so desperate to not become like the others. but also him suddenly having a robe is going to send me thru the roof

also Do Not understand soldier degredation being such a heavy theme here when its about the EXTRA sephiroth related experiments hojo is performing on soldiers? as far as i can tell????? its starting to irritate the hell out of me bc thats not the same fuckin thing as regular soldier degradation. the way its being written is beginning to grate on me which is.....a bummer. i get its also partially to make new players over look certain things about clouds behavior, i assume, but thats also getting to be kind of frustrating bc my god there is nothing wrong with a hint of subtlety. really funny im saying that now when i was So afraid during remake they /wouldnt express his mental illness

think im extra frustrated about it bc the layout of the manor is still throwing me off on top of wondering why th hell i had to get sent into another one of hojo's underground labs. again, i get it. he experiments and makes monsters. got it. i think having So much experiment space takes away from the mansion itself and its role in the story, personally. need to check the map in crisis core to get my bearings about this

and doing one boss fight against an incredibly fast paced boss, forced to use a party member i Dont Use, and then walk out into ANOTHER fast paced boss fight. both of which were honestly, frankly, kind of pointless.

seeing Vincent become a monster was rad as hell but at the same time. why the fuck was i fightning vincent

going to be honest about this i dont really like cid or vincents role in this game. wishing they had either had introductions that led them to joining the party or just not been in the game at all

i know its like! cool to see them and fun and im sure just done for the fans and i dont Hate it so much as it just.....feels like a huge waste to do it this way. id rather them have plots that let me get to know them than waste their character introductions on cameos bc the devs know itll be another 5 years before they drop the next game. i can wait. id rather wait

IM JUST.....really thrown off by the pacing or the writing of this section of the game i guess 😔

i thought tifa and cloud by the bridge was really good. tifa sometimes throws me off in 7r but her lying straight to clouds face was great. so down for that

yuffies response when you get to the reactor was really good i liked that a lot too. tho i did think she was literally going to steal my shit and leave the party. i know she does that in 7 and i thought mayb this was going to be how they wrote it......which i woulda been so mad but not at the Writing. i kept saving every 3 seconds worried about it GBFBGH

think i just had too much of an expectation for what going in to the manor would be like and not only was that not met but it also wasnt very good. (the cid and vincent of it all isnt really related to that but it did solidify how i was already starting to feel in response to cids role in rebirth)

BBBLLGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHGGGHH HHHHH HHHHHHHGGHGHH

#iv got to go off a little about this somewhere or ill lose my mind #also dont want it to sour the rest of my experience bc there is so much that i care about and am enjoying in this game #just a little frustrated #please do not misunderstand.... #putting this as a read more for a reason #exorcising the demons

[4kids2dogsandabreakdown]

Dashi Birth Story

Okay so, its been 6 years and much of this is from memory. I know I wrote a diary while I was in the hospital with Dashi but I cant find the damn thing!

Monday 8th January 2018, Was having contractions in the morning, we got the kids ready for school and nursery. My best friend and David were there, once the kids went off I dont think it was long before we were heading to the hospital. My friend was laughing hysterically at me because I was 'mooing' with each contraction :D

We'd had a number of meetings with the hospital before going in for this delivery and it had been agreed that I would be able to labour in the midwife led unit without constant monitoring. I know the doctors had reservations about it, but it genuinely made the labour so much easier for me.

I was in the birth pool the whole time, I coped well with the pain and only had a bit of gas and air all the way through.

We were given space and privacy for most of the time between them checking the baby/me so we were alone when the waters burst. The pool became murky which seemed like something we should be worried about so we asked the midwife to come back in.

At that point I was starting to want to push. I think they checked how dialated I was, then I was pushing. Two midwives were assisting, catching her. She was very briefly put on my chest and then taken out of the room. I was informed that she had breathed in meconium and was struggling to breathe properly.

She was born at 2.15pm, before the kids had even finished school.

I was....scared, but kind of numb too, like I daren`t think too hard in case I went off the deep end completely and lost my shit.

So me and David were just sitting alone in this labour room eating toast and having a cup of coffee wondering if our baby was dead.

I felt like shit, but Id just given birth so it was kind of expected. I tried to go to the toilet, I managed to stand up but as I did a LOT of blood fell out of me and I hit the deck. I dont remember being lifted or put on the bed, there were suddenly loads of people running around (David had pushed the emergency button).

I really thought I might die, Ive been through a fair amount of scary situations but I think this one was the closest Ive come to not surviving. David held it and me together. I was rushed to a delivery room and they started manually removing clots from my womb (without an epidural) but they couldnt get me to stop bleeding. So it was decided Id have to go to theatre and hopefully stop the bleeding in there.

Luckily I only had to have an epidural instead of a general but it being in theatre again was horrific and not something I ever ever want to go through again.

I was taken to a ward afterwards, Im not sure where david was, I think Id sent him to watch over Dashi. They said I couldnt go and see her until I was more recovered. I was absolutely not having that. I managed to get a nurse to take me to the toilet, sadly because of the epidural and pessary they'd given me I shit all over her (I felt SO bad for her!) but she just cleaned me up and was really professional about it.

So, 10 hours after she was born I finally got to meet Dashi properly. I really cant remember if I held her that night, I think I did, I remember her being placed on me attached to all the wires and things.

The kids came to NICU to meet Dashi while she was still in the incubator, it was all very overwhelming for them. My bestie also snuck herself in by telling the nurses she was my wife and the other mum!

The next couple of days Dashi was kept in NICU because the meconium had caused an infection in her lungs and then the machines they'd had to use to get her to breath caused a hole in her lung to develop.

I walked 19000 steps the first day taking breastmilk to the NICU ward. The only thing I could do was provide milk so I was going to do it SO DAMN WELL. I asked a nurse for something to collect colostrum and she handed us a 5ml syringe....I was like, either give me 10 of these or something bigger XD

Eventually after a few days she was well enough to come out of the incubator and into the mum/baby special care ward with me. Being able to dress her and feed her was amazing. I was really missing home though.

We went home on Sunday, so 6 days in hospital all together. Hizashi Jasmine.

#birth story #Dashi #hizashi jasmine #christ that was a long story #congrats if you read all of that!