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eff-plays · 1 month

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Not exactly a dadstarion truther either (mostly bc it took me a while to actually warm up to the idea and also hes NEVER having kids with my durge, only my tav (can you imagine this man parenting a Bhaalspawn? A dhampir Bhaalspawn?? Nonono.)) But I do find something a little compelling about the thought of this man who a) has had absolutely nothing of his own for as long as he can remember and b) sees himself as worthless and irreparably fucked up creating this tiny new person? Like, they're part of him, he made this precious little creature (with the person he already loves most)? This soft and innocent thing? (Which he would waffle awfully between wanting to keep innocent for as long as possible but also making sure they know about life's horrors so they can avoid them) Like sure the baby version is annoyingly loud and can't do anything and also gross and smells but he can teach the toddler to bite people. He is the absolute worst enabler, spoils the kid rotten. Teaches them to steal and pick locks and just lets them get away with murder. Parent #2 has to do all the actual parenting part cuz damn he's not doing the discipline thing at all.

Also the vain part of him likes looking at his kid and sort of seeing some of his face in them, since he can't use an actual mirror.

Well he'd be cured by the time he has the kid or soon after in my canon, so that last part wouldn't apply for me.

And yeah, when I say that I'm not a dadstarion truther I don't mean that I don't see it happening ever, but more that to me, that first step in itself is the one that I see as least likely.

Because I can accept that he would learn to love the kid, that he would care about it and spoil it. I can also accept (and would gladly explore) him having a complicated relationship with the kid, either early on in a postpartum depression sort of way, or further down the line in a "I can't find common ground with my teen/young adult" sort of way (or both lbr).

The problem, to me, is that I don't see Astarion going "let's have a kid!" I don't see him genuinely wanting one, and I don't see him finding any reason to lie about wanting one, and I don't see Hira believing any of those lies even if he does try. It's really the initial hurdle. The rest I'm happy to make as dysfunctional and weird as it would realistically be when a guy who shouldn't be a dad becomes a dad. One of the reasons I came up with Critter is because I find it compelling how much Astarion is not a dad guy, and how that would fuck up a person like Critter. That's juicy stuff. And also a way for me to work out my own daddy issues I guess lmao.

But getting that started? Actually inventing a reason for how Astarion would even agree to it? That's where I struggle. And that's why I'm torn. Cuz I do want to stay true to my own interpretation of a character, while also wanting to create a new character and put them both (and also Hira) in situations.

Like I'm happy for all the dadstarion peeps who have cool dhampir girlies running around on adventures and I'd love to join them, but I also think that if I were true to Astarion's characterization, that kid would have issues. Like maybe a lot of them.

#bg3 #i'm not in it for the squee of omg cute baby!!#i do not care about babies or kids in general it's not why i'm here #i have no parental instincts and do not personally plan to ever reproduce #nor am i in it for the nuclear faerûnian family fantasy #i'm in it for the 'my traumatized parents love me but couldn't help but traumatize me in small ways just by being themselves'#'cuz parents are also people and maybe they regret having me and maybe i made their lives worse'#'but they also can't imagine it without me because i'm part of them and they're part of me'#ya feel me???#like yeah i imagine most of the kid's life is excellent and both parents love them v much #but having astarion as a parent would defo do things to your brain that maybe shouldn't be done #hira would be passable if paired with a normal person but they wouldn't tolerate anything but complete devotion to their child #(which astarion fundamentally can't provide imo)#which is also bad cuz bby ur shutting down all communication and compromise and making asty feel like shit #like it would be very dysfunctional for a long while until the kid was like older toddler-age maybe #until the point where astarion would realize there's a person in there and not just a weird crying shitting bag of meat that his partner #inexplicably values over him #once that realization hits him i think he'd do way better #but until then he's fucked

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matchandelure · 2 months

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i fear that the undercover top secret government assassins are growing on me (cp9)

#I HAD ZERO THOUGHTS ABOUT THEM AT FIRST #IN FACT I WAS DEVASTATED THAT THE WATER 7 QUARTET WERE ACTUALLY CP9 #BUT THEN??????? I READ CP9'S INDEPENDENT REPORT AND. I!?!??!?@?!?#the thoughts are endless ive been having one piece dreams every night for the past few days and they have all been cp9 related the brainrot #is so bad. i am sodgjkadhg #i love one piece there are so many characters with each new arc i get to i get some new characters to obsess over i love it i feel so alive #ive been fighting tooth and nail avoiding spoilers for the latest episode BUT GOD IM SO SO TEMPTED TO. TAKE A PEEK #anyways last night i was once again doing a wiki deep dive and i found some silly things on cp9's pages #JABRA AND LUCCI ARE THE SAME HEIGHT!!!!! THIS IS SO FUCKING FUNNY #CAN YOU IMAGINE?!?!?! the kid you've had beef with since he was 13 (maybe even earlier since lucci alreayd knew him when he was 6) who you #used to have a whole head over is now at eye level with you i would actually be so embarrased #KAKU IS FROM EAST BLUE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! THIS IS OS IMPORTANT ACTUALLY!! THE MOST IMPORATNT FACT EVER!!!!!!!!!!!#so he knows the strawhats are...also from the east blue right?!? right??????! and ik the wg steals these kids early on to train them so i #doubt he has lingering attachments to his home sea but i still think this so both so so sad and so important :'((#also not getting over how oda's depiction of tiny kaku has him holding a toy boat BC ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!?! ARE YOU K IDDING ME #kalifa and jabra's favourite dishes are both lamb based!!!!!!!!! silly because her animal motif is a sheep haha #BUT ALSO considering how her father was also cp9 and she's probably been conditioned since birth to also follow his footsteps and how jabra #holds seniority in the current lineup id like to think that these two have known each other a very long time and there were influences #the most dysfunctional fcked up family ever. cp9 #blueno and jabra are both from the north blue!!!!!!!!!!!!! and that one falshbakc we see that the two of them plus 6year old lucci trained #together but also it would be so fcked up if the two actually knew of each other before being roped into the governemnt #idk how the wg works do they just??? routinely scout around and pick up a bunch of kids ata time???? were jabra and blueno taken together??#also wondering if ... kalifa jabra and kumadori knew each other the longest as fellow agents or soemthing #i feel like im entertaining a gazillion thoughts all at once its so hard ot balance but we know both kalifa nad kumadori have #parents in the governemnt/assassin profession that also influenced them right #idk maybe one thing they can bond over #cp9 to me is just a fucked up family of some sort. they are not found family they are like some weird forged family where they were all #forced together and somehow made it work and they all love lucci and care for his wellbeing enough to raise all that money to get him to a #doctor and they cared about each other enough to get off enies lobby together without leaving anyone behind and they went cafe hopping and #shopping and bowling together and they all care for each other in their own way

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dilutedbeanibeans · 3 months

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Yee. Felt like a powerhouse before I took a 5-year hiatus of my own (Work on more original stuff before coming back, as the love still burns stronger than ever)! And sure, you can! It's always nice to have something that inspires others! (^^) I may do Terramix as either a full-on comic series or talk like this in catalogue (Or maybe even Storybook or PowerPoint) format, with some pictures to show for it!

Was there anything else you had in mind that you planned to implement with Terra, God, and Co.?

oh well!!! honestly like I said in my past tags, a lot of my focus is the x-zero series (ignore that I barely draw them they’re just. hard to draw😞) so I have a Lot more ideas for them but!!!

I am trying to figure out a sunstar backstory (kinda like. 60-79% ish done) if that counts

also trying to figure out some stuff for the other droids!!!! just. tackling one thing at a time and starting with my favs first😭

I plan to do more ra moon and stardroid stuff in the future though!!! they’re rlly interesting and it sucks they barely have any canon content :(

#I’m trying to think of anything else I’m gonna do with them #ummmm #probably make some silly aus or something after I’m done thinking abt all their stories #OH YEAH #the kupierdroids would still be relevant #I do believe mars and jupiter would get along best with them #I kinda see the the stardroids as some weird found family type but like.#slightly dysfunctional yeah #and then they have a whole buncha kuiper droids they have to look out for😭#oops rambled again #but. in all honestly kinda wanna focus on sunstar and terras dynamic #they r very neat 2 me #asks

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tj-crochets · 1 year

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Every time you post you make me want to make something!! How do you manage to start and finish so many projects constantly? I’m also disabled and its always so hard to find the spoons to finish my projects 😭

I definitely feel you on the difficulty finding spoons thing, I had multiple days this week where I did absolutely no crafting at all because I was just completely out of spoons. This explanation got long, so it's below a read more

For me, crafting is a...I'm not sure how to word it. A load-bearing hobby? Making a physical, tangible object gets me those good "finished task" brain chemicals while at the same time letting me learn a skill (one of my favorite things to do) and ending up with an object that I will probably eventually give to someone (also one of my favorite things to do, matching objects to the people who will love them). If I go too long without crafting I get antsy and grumpy and I get frustrated easily. Other load bearing hobbies for me are reading and making music; too long without any of them and I feel off-balance, metaphorically. I have a variety of crafts I keep supplies for on-hand for different spoon level days; for me crochet takes less spoons than knitting, which takes less spoons than all but the simplest plushie sewing, which takes less spoons than most quilting. There's some differences; plushie making is less physically taxing for me than quilting but takes a lot more focus, so if I'm having a good physical spoons day but a bad mental spoons day I might opt for quilting instead of plushies? The other thing that's helped me a lot is forgiving myself for unfinished projects. I used to feel guilty when I got hung up on a project and couldn't finish it, and I'd struggle through it and not want to craft and it would take forever and I'd be unhappy the entire time, or I'd set it aside and try to make other things but feel guilty the whole time because I thought I should be making something else. These days, I have gotten a lot better at accepting that I have limits, both physical and mental, and it's okay for me to respect them. Not finishing a crafting project is a morally neutral thing; for me, crafts are for enjoying, and if I enjoyed making the part of the project I made then I got something out of it even if I never finish it. I also think no crafting effort is wasted, you'll learn something from it even if all you learn is that you don't like that particular craft. The other other thing that helps me start and finish so many projects so often is that I am lucky enough to be able to keep the basic supplies for a wide variety of projects on hand at all times, so that I can make almost anything as the whim strikes me (like grumpy bunnies this week). I think of it like keeping a stocked pantry as a baker; you might not know what you'll want to make tomorrow, but you know you'll probably need sugar and flour and salt, and as you learn more about baking you can tailor your stock of supplies to what you like to make (for me in sewing, that means keeping a rainbow of minky and some faux fur on hand, so that I have many colors to choose from because I really enjoy working with color. In knitting, it means keeping a particular yarn in any color on hand because I pretty much only knit beanies these days and I don't care what color they are but do care about the yarn. Your "staple supplies" will vary based on your craft, your preferences, your budget, and your storage space, but I absolutely love being able to impulse craft things)

#ask away!#itsbumblebunnybee #long post #my methods are also what works for my particular disability and brain fog/executive dysfunction/possible ADHD #the methods that work for you might be very different #it's important to find the methods that work for you because everyone is different and has different requirements #the bit I didn't include in the load-bearing hobby thing #is that crafting is a very good de-stressing kind of hobby for me #and my weird allergy issues mean that if I get too stressed/upset I can have an allergic reaction to it #so crafting is part of how I manage my health #oh heck I also forgot to mention disability accommodations for crafts #my family keeps a chair in the kitchen so that I can sit down when cooking because standing in one place is hard for me #and I have a table next to my seat in the living room even though my dad dislikes the clutter #because having my feet up helps a lot with my low blood pressure issues #and I need a table for the yarn/needles/safety eyes/etc of whatever I am working on at the moment #I don't have a simple answer for you about how I do so much crafting #sorry! I tried to answer but I just don't have one singular answer

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kareenvorbarra · 2 years

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I just started fantasy high sophomore year and I really hope we get more hallariel content this season because I can’t stop thinking about her. what is her deal? what is up with her taste in men? what is her relationship with fabian like when she’s not completely out of it?

#fabian’s family was so deeply weird in season 1 and I feel like it was not….fully explored #he was clearly very loved and more well-adjusted than kristen or adaine but the seacasters felt. dysfunctional for sure #and his parents’ issues kind of felt like they were played for laughs until the very end #anyway now that hallariel is sober and in a new relationship I hope we can get a little bit of her personality #fandom musings

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princessnijireiki · 2 years

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Hi! I think its interesting that you point out that Q'orianka Kilcher forgot her ass wasnt white 😂😂😂 but I really think she forgot because she has actually quite a lot of white familial relationships and has a white family and is arguably white adjacent. Despite this, it's a shame that her white family will probably not put their necks on the line like you said. Also, I wonder how members of the Navajo nation (I believe it was the Navajo who adopted her in for her fame status and money?? Allegedly) will react

I wouldn't say she's white adjacent necessarily, because she's definitely built her whole brand & identity on embodying a certain kind of white gaze image of Indigeneity, so like... she HAS to know that physically, there's no way lol.

But I think she fell into the very cliché biracial trap of being surrounded entirely & exclusively by the white side of her family (except for her one other biracial brother) and letting that delude her into thinking she has access to their privilege, and can play by their social rules. Like she very very much forgot that she is not going to be treated like a young blonde ingenue when she commits a crime, and that despite her fans & her career, getting caught out with something like this just turns you back into a "scamming Indian" or "thieving Spic" in a lot of folks' eyes, and having a white mom, stepdad, and fully white brother will not save you from that!

And on top of that, the other white Kilchers don't really seem to fuck with her mama, or by extension, her. Jewel only even publicly acknowledged they're cousins SUPER recently, like promoed her being on Yellowstone, so I'm sure she's not eager to have her name associated with this. The Kilchers in Alaska who have a reality TV show have never mentioned that part of the family.

And whatever Tribal Nation she's been "adopted" into will not be sticking their necks out for her, either. Especially since that was really done as a way to network & access North American Native resources and acting roles for her, and not to like buy a fake heritage, they'll have no reason to even acknowledge this case.

I'm honestly expecting radio silence from a lot of folks, including her friends in Native Hollywood, because the kind of scrutiny she's under really is going to destroy her career. And especially in a moment where like, film & TV is just getting back on its feet since the start of the pandemic, Indigenous TV is having a big moment, and big studios have been making some long overdue baby steps into casting diversity, nobody wants to lose that momentum for HER, and there's a line out the door of equally skilled Native talent ready & eager to fill her place.

All of this may play out differently by the time this goes to court in August, so we'll see. But I anticipate she's really gonna be left high & dry on this one, and may even deserve it.

#horchatachinchilla #I do feel kinda bad that it's just very obvious her mom exploited her growing up & that that contributed to her isolation from her peers #like obviously isolation from her dad's side of the family + didn't maintain cultural roots for the kids #but also I think tied her up in such weird family shit that it affected her professional life too #but the flip side is this is a 32yo woman who scammed for $97k by faking a disability in a pandemic #and in a VERY narrow niche of an industry does not have any strong friendships/alliances that help her even when business is booming #like... that's on her at that point lol #and tbh there is clearly a family history of scammy bullshit between jewel's mom + her mom + now her #so I do understand all the family being wary of anyone who seems exploitatively ambitious and/or who hustles social svcs regularly...#but it also has a big ''I LEARNED IT FROM WATCHING YOU 😭'' vibe & it's not the other kilchers' first rodeo #like when you lay the family history out this DOES make sense lmao but that's just because they got a dysfunctional ass family.#q'orianka kilcher #qorianka kilcher

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cursezoroark · 3 months

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this panel is so good at scaring the shit out of me.

#I HAVE SO MUCH CONTEMPT. FOR ONE CHARACTER.#but yet i also have very complicated feelings this is the closest the manga will rlly get to unhealthy relationships in family #ruby was shown on TV being CAPTURED and you get mainly pissed off. there was a line that conveyed he was glad he was ok but. the imposing #pressure he emits is ASTOUNDING. Ruby views his time with his father as his best memory AND his worst nightmare. think.#note: i am aware that he actually Cares for Ruby a lot. he sucks shit at expressing it due to the loss of their shared interest.#anyways i should portray them in a weird dysfunctioning way. thats in my brain right now. weird father son dysfunctional family relationshi #talk #like dude. Dude. family therapy for both of you right now you're both emotionally repressed as hell and it does even more damage #i do have thoughts that are more in depth with norman as a character i never deny that. but that also means i get to deck him at least Once

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oncillabrigade · 12 days

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Consider:

The Bats all have personalized ring tones for one another, but everyone has both a civilian and a Bat ring tone. The civilian ones are chaos, with everyone choosing whatever they want for their various family members and friends. BUT! Everyone has a single Bat tone that all other team members use for them.

The catch? Bruce forbid them from choosing their own Bat ring tones because he proposed this plan back in Dick's Robin days and he IMMEDIATELY picked "Toxic." The choice was not well received.

Bruce: Dick, I will not be alerted to the fact that you're in danger by some Britney Spears song.

Dick: First of all, it is not some Britney song, it is the Britney song. That song finally won her a Grammy.

Bruce: *sighs*

Dick: Second of all, it won't tell you when I'm in danger... it'll tell you when Robin is.

Bruce:

Bruce: I'm taking the Walkman out of the Robin kit.

Dick: *offended gasp*

(Yes, Dick is old enough for a Walkman. No, you will not change my mind. Yes, the Tim-and-on siblings all find that hilarious. Yes, Jason has to be VERY careful not to mention that he borrowed that Walkman for years because he was uncomfortable taking expensive electronics out and about with him.)

Anyway!

Dick then proposes a slew of other songs for the whole team to use, all of which are pop culture references, e.g. the Scrubs theme because they're not Superman and also they're a dysfunctional family of coworkers; the theme from the Godfather because "let's be honest, B, we are basically our own mafia"; "Where is My Mind" by the Pixies because lol identity shenanigans, etc. The list is endless. Bruce spends weeks groaning every time his son texts him.

Eventually, they compromise on the version of "The Entertainer" from The Sting because they're hiding in plain sight to enact a mission defending good people in a hard world. Bruce, Dick, and Alfred are all so pleased with this that they each take a different section of the song as their ring tone.

Then Barbara becomes Batgirl, so she gets a section... and then Jason becomes Robin and gets one, too... and then Tim, then Steph, and then Cass is taken in, and... uh oh. That's a lot of people for one song.

But it's family tradition! They can't stop now. That would be so unfair to the new kids, B!

So they start using alternate arrangements of the song. Bruce has mellowed slightly on the "no choosing your own" thing. As long as it's a version of "The Entertainer" (within reason) he'll allow it.

Tim retroactively changes his ring tone to a weird groove-ska arrangement Bart randomly sent him on YouTube because have you met Tim Drake? Of course he went for hilarious obscurity. (Bruce grits his teeth and approves it after lots of prompting from Dick and Alfred). Steph makes it her mission to find a weirder one (Bruce agrees because he's too tired to deal with accusations of favoritism).

Cass creates her own arrangement on theremin because apparently she knows how to play the theremin. No one is sure why. Upon inquiry, she just says, "spooky noises are fun," but does not elaborate further even when she's asked to do so. A Batgirl's gotta have her secrets—Babs taught her that.

When Jason starts working with his family again, he pays an aspiring music producer within Red Hood's ranks to create a minor key remix of the original Robin II ring tone. His siblings (minus Cass) are VERY jealous he has his own personalized arrangement. Dick, Tim, and Steph end up paying this goon who owns Garage Band to do ones for them, too. Duke does the same when he joins the team.

Meanwhile, in a fit of little brotherly pique, Damian steals Tim's original ring tone. He hopes to rub salt in the Robin replacement wounds. He fails! Tim finds it beyond funny that Damian's ring tone is groove-ska. So Damian quietly pays the amateur producer to make him one that's cooler than Tim's. He pays a ludicrous amount, though, because Steph paid for one cooler than Jason's and Tim paid for one cooler than Steph's.

(Dick wanted one cooler than Jason's too, but he had $63.02 in his bank account at the time and Bruce flat out refused to use the Batbudget on "a super cool ring tone that's better than Jay's." Eventually, Dick just paid himself for an averagely cool one. In installments.)

At this point, the Bats have single-handedly given this fledgling producer enough money to quit being a goon and start an indie music studio. His first customers are mostly superheroes from out of town who like what the Bats have going on and want their own team ring tones. Harley and Ivy get in on that action, too.

Then, as word spreads, every local crook/henchperson with a side band (there are many) flocks to the studio to have their stuff produced by one of their own. Gotham rogues suddenly have an unemployment problem, while the city finds itself with a flourishing indie music scene that puts Metropolis' to shame. The entire state of New Jersey is celebrating the dual victory.

Dick has never been so glad someone doesn't like Britney Spears' magnum opus.

#batfam #bruce wayne #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #damian wayne #stephanie brown #duke thomas #cassandra cain #barbara gordon #harley quinn #poison ivy #the bats are all secret goofs and I love them #actually some of them are openly goofs #cough dick grayson cough #he's living his best life #jacey writes

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eileennatural · 2 years

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this past weekend i saw my seventh grade math teacher again for this first time in years and yeah. he was exactly as hot as i remember him

#tbh i think the only reason i was so into him was bc i was pretty obv one of his favorite students. but he wasnt weird abt it #and as the youngest child in a very loud and somewhat dysfunctional family. well being the favorite really did it for #13 yr old me not gonna lie

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religion-is-a-mental-illness · 10 months

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By: Chloe Cole

Published: July 28, 2023

On Thursday, her 19th birthday, Chloe Cole testified to Congress with a “final warning” that medical treatments to change the gender of confused children is horrific. Cole, who was given surgery as a teenager to become male and soon regretted it, said what she needed most was therapy, not a scalpel. Here is what she told lawmakers:

My name is Chloe Cole and I am a de-transitioner.

Another way to put that would be: I used to believe that I was born in the wrong body and the adults in my life, whom I trusted, affirmed my belief, and this caused me lifelong, irreversible harm.

I speak to you today as a victim of one of the biggest medical scandals in the history of the United States of America.

I speak to you in the hope that you will have the courage to bring the scandal to an end, and ensure that other vulnerable teenagers, children and young adults don’t go through what I went through.

Deceit & coercion

At the age of 12, I began to experience what my medical team would later diagnose as gender dysphoria.

I was well into an early puberty, and I was very uncomfortable with the changes that were happening to my body. I was intimidated by male attention.

And when I told my parents that I felt like a boy, in retrospect, all I meant was that I hated puberty, that I wanted this newfound sexual tension to go away.

I looked up to my brothers a little bit more than I did to my sisters.

I came out as transgender in a letter I sent on the dining room table.

My parents were immediately concerned.

They felt like they needed to get outside help from medical professionals.

But this proved to be a mistake.

It immediately set our entire family down a path of ideologically motivated deceit and coercion.

The general specialist I was taken to see told my parents that I needed to be put on puberty-blocking drugs right away.

They asked my parents a simple question: Would you rather have a dead daughter or a living transgender son?

The choice was enough for my parents to let their guard down, and in retrospect, I can’t blame them.

This is the moment that we all became victims of so-called gender-affirming care.

I was fast-tracked onto puberty blockers and then testosterone.

The resulting menopausal-like hot flashes made focusing on school impossible.

I still get joint pains and weird pops in my back.

But they were far worse when I was on the blockers.

Forever changed

A month later, when I was 13, I had my first testosterone injection.

It has caused permanent changes in my body: My voice will forever be deeper, my jawline sharper, my nose longer, my bone structure permanently masculinized, my Adam’s apple more prominent, my fertility unknown.

I look in the mirror sometimes, and I feel like a monster.

I had a double mastectomy at 15.

They tested my amputated breasts for cancer.

That was cancer-free, of course; I was perfectly healthy.

There is nothing wrong with my still-developing body, or my breasts other than that, as an insecure teenage girl, I felt awkward about it.

After my breasts were taken away from me, the tissue was incinerated — before I was able to legally drive.

I had a huge part of my future womanhood taken from me.

I will never be able to breastfeed.

I struggle to look at myself in the mirror at times.

I still struggle to this day with sexual dysfunction.

And I have massive scars across my chest and the skin grafts that they used, that they took of my nipples, are weeping fluid today, and they’re grafted into a more masculine positioning, they said.

After surgery, my grades in school plummeted.

Everything that I went through did nothing to address the underlying mental health issues that I had.

And my doctors with their theories on gender that all my problems would go away as soon as I was surgically transformed into something that vaguely resembled a boy — their theories were wrong.

The drugs and surgeries changed my body, but they did not and could not change the basic reality that I am, and forever will be, a female.

Depths of despair

When my specialists first told my parents they could have a dead daughter or a live transgender son, I wasn’t suicidal.

I was a happy child who struggled because she was different.

However at 16, after my surgery, I did become suicidal.

I’m doing better now, but my parents almost got the dead daughter promised to them by my doctors.

My doctor had almost created the very nightmare they said they were trying to avoid.

So what message do I want to bring to American teenagers and their families?

I didn’t need to be lied to.

I needed compassion.

I needed to be loved.

I needed to be given therapy that helped me work through my issues, not affirmed my delusion that by transforming into a boy, it would solve all my problems.

We need to stop telling 12-year-olds that they were born wrong, that they are right to reject their own bodies and feel uncomfortable with their own skin.

We need to stop telling children that puberty is an option, that they can choose what kind of puberty they will go through, just like they can choose what clothes to wear or what music to listen to.

Pseudoscience

Puberty is a rite of passage to adulthood, not a disease to be mitigated.

Today, I should be at home with my family celebrating my 19th birthday.

Instead, I’m making a desperate plea to my elected representatives.

Learn the lessons from other medical scandals, like the opioid crisis.

Recognize that doctors are human, too, and sometimes they are wrong.

My childhood was ruined along with thousands of de-transitioners that I know through our networks.

This needs to stop. You alone can stop it.

Enough children have already been victimized by this barbaric pseudoscience.

Please let me be your final warning.

Thank you.

Might as well call her a murtad and kufr.

"The medical industry mutilated me, maybe don't mutilate other kids," shouldn't require bravery or renouncing an ideology.

Reminder: A minor under the age of 18 is too young to agree to a cellphone contract. 🤦‍♀️

#Chloe Cole #detrans #detransition #gender ideology #queer theory #medical malpractice #medical scandal #medical mutilation #gender affirming #gender affirming care #affirmation model #double mastectomy #gender cult #sex trait modification #genderwang #religion is a mental illness

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demontonic · 1 year

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Ethan Landry - Perverted

There will be undoubtedly a part 2 since i realized this was hitting 2000 words and i wasnt about to make you guys wait another three days till i put out the smut so take this background as a starter so i can finish the rest! Also let me know if you want to be on my taglist for part 2

Word Count: 2274

TW: Blood, Knives

Ethan had always been quiet around you, unless you were with the others but even then there was very little interaction. At first you thought he didn’t like you, then you thought maybe I’m too loud for him- but that couldn’t be it. If that were true he wouldn’t like Chad, and he was worse than you. Countless possibilities rushed through your mind every time you saw him and it slowly tumbled into a sick infatuation. You started to take note of who he talked to, especially if it was another girl. Watching even the smallest of mannerisms and remembering what his body language meant. At some point you decided to ask for his social media from Chad, of course he teased you about it immediately making sense of why he caught you staring at the nerd. After that Mindy found out and of course told Tara who told Sam and Quinn, nothing could stay a secret for too long in this dysfunctional family.

The gang decided to help your seemingly innocent crush on the curly haired brunette, however they had no idea what you really thought about him. You had always been one to get too involved with the people you had liked. Sure it was a long running joke that girls had the skills of FBI agents, but combine that with no social life… it’s almost concerning. You had always gotten weird vibes around him, call it intuition but you had never imagined your feelings to be remotely correct. One night you were out late, making a short walk back from the small market on the corner of your street. You decided since the gang went out -and you had zero social battery left- you would simply drink by yourself tonight. You stuffed the plastic bag filled with a few medium sized bottles of vodka and some cheap berry blend juice into the small backpack you had. Going to the small pizza restaurant and picking up the pizza you ordered for when you inevitably got the munchies. It was a short walk back to the apartment, maybe 15-20 minutes at most. Besides, you had done this many times before but what you were about to encounter would change the course of the next month.

Most of the surrounding apartments housed students from Blackmore University, it was afterall a close walk to the college. If your music hadn’t lagged when it did you would’ve missed the noise coming from the dark alley. What a cliche. You and Mindy were horror fanatics and after Woodsboro you knew better than to go into the pitch black void filled with shuffling noises. The cool air that racked against your exposed arms only added to the adrenaline that began to pump through your veins as you finally came to the realization that you had been standing and staring into the alleyway for a minute now. The small pizza box now being set on the top of a dumpster as you paused the music blasting in your eardrums, placing the small earbuds in their case so that you were now fully aware of your surroundings.

You pulled out the butterfly knife you had trained yourself to be moderately skilled with in times like these. The purple handle being grasped tightly in your fist as you crept slowly towards the sound you had yet to find the source of. There was a corner about mid way through, a small light illuminating that portion as you peaked your head around the corner. At first it took your eyes a second to adjust to the sudden change but once you did you realized that the boy you had been truthfully stalking was more than met the eye. He was crouched next to a dumpster, his surprisingly toned torso lightly splatter with specs of blood. Black jeans and doc martens being the only thing on him besides a black wrist watch. However upon squinting you see a blade entirely covered in blood, the crimson liquid falling into a small puddle between his legs. A Ghostface mask hung on the edge of the dumpster, the usually white face having the same crimson adorning it only in the shape of a handprint. You wanted to believe that maybe it was a costume, but you knew he would never do that with the people he associated with. You watched, frozen, as he wiped the blade on his thigh to rid it of blood before shoving it into a backpack. He pulled out a blue polo shirt, slipping it on as he shoved -what you could only assume was the rest of the Ghost face robe- in before placing the mask on top and zipping it closed.

You took a few steps back, going to hide yourself behind the few trash bags that were leaned against the walls next to you. It was too dark for him to notice you, wearing mostly black you blended in with the shadows. He turned the corner, walking out the way you had entered only he paused. Ethan didn’t turn around to face you, not his body or even a slight turn of his head. You held your breath, your heart pounding in your chest, you felt like he could hear it.

“Stalking someone you don’t even talk to isn’t a good look,” his voice sounded like he was smiling, it held pride and darkness. Your eyes widened as you readied your knife, preparing yourself for the worst case possible. He took a few steps back, stopping right in front of you as he dropped his backpack. A hand grabbed at the wrist that held the small blade, pulling you to your feet as he stared at you with empty eyes.

“Being covered in blood isn’t exactly a good image either,” you scowled as he only looked at you with a smug expression plastered on his annoyingly perfect face. “You’ve had plenty of time to try and gouge my eyes out, kick, scream, grab your knife with your free hand and yet you stare at me- now that’s a bad look Y/N.” Ethan was right, you swallowed the lump in your throat as you snatched your hand from his grip, slicing his palm open in the process. He hissed lowly as he retracted his arm, assessing the wound before licking it. Your mouth gaped open as you stared at the seemingly psychotic man in front of you. “Did you know your saliva can help the healing process for wounds? I’m sure you’re thinking I did that for show but there's a reason behind everything I do. I’m surprised you didn’t find me out sooner, considering you never stop following me, watching me.”

“Yeah well that was before I knew you were a killer, so take that with a grain of salt-“

“So you think it’s justified? Stalking an innocent college boy- or nerd as you love to call me.”

“Innocent isn’t exactly how I’d describe you, but if it helps you sleep at night,” what are you thinking? He’s a serial killer, a COPYCAT of someone who almost killed you. Your conscience was bellowing inside of your head, however here you stood face to face with the guy you’d been drooling over since the start of the year, with full knowledge of his true agenda. “What helps me sleep at night is knowing that someone as sick and perverted as you can be so stupid as to stay here and chit chat with someone who’s quite literally trying to kill your friends.” You scoffed… you scoffed “Real smart revealing your entire plan-“

“How desperate are you? How insane are you to stand here and hold a conversation with me? Or am I just that hot-“

“Shut the fuck up you are so full of yourself I’m surprised you’ve gotten this far-“ Sirens. Police had begun to pull up to the apartment buildings, your heart beat picking up as this scene looked very sketchy. You talking with the killer calmly in the alleyway outside of a crime scene wouldn’t hold up well in court. Ethan groaned as he took off running the opposite side of the alleyway opting out on a long way home rather than the route you were taking. Without even processing what was happening you emerged from the alley, grabbing the pizza box and walking home. You wish you could say it was peaceful but your thoughts were consumed by the interaction… and the rush it gave you.

The next morning

It was a weekend, you woke up around noon, the pizza box being thrown to the floor and your bottles tucked away in the crevice between your bed and nightstand. Your head spun lightly, a slight headache setting in but nothing you couldn’t handle, you were practically a pro at handling hangovers. At first you ran through your morning routine like normal, mind fuzzy and not fully recalling the events from last night. That was until you walked back into your room realizing there was a small gift bag on your nightstand. The gift was black and covered with white ghosts, tied with a red ribbon. “What the fuck,” you muttered under your breath before opening it. The contents poured on to your stand, your knife accompanied by a small piece of paper fell out. You stopped breathing for a moment as reality crashed down on you; he was in your room while you were sleeping. You opened the small note, reading the neat writing in red ink.

you’re stupid enough not to notice that I took your knife? and that was before you were shit faced, you were out pretty cold, you almost looked cute.

p.s. thanks for the free pizza❤️

For a second you let yourself forget everything you just read, reverting back to your sick infatuation with the seemingly quiet nerdy boy. He called me cute. You knew you were twisted when your heart fluttered while reading the note like it was some stupid middle school crush. He called me stupid and broke into my apartment. You crumbled the note up, going to throw it away but you hesitated, why are you second guessing this? You didn’t know, but you flattened it out, folded it, and placed it back into the bag and left it in your nightstand. As for your knife you placed it back into your bag before getting dressed to hang out with your friends, unfortunately they still think you’re head over heels for Ethan. As you emerged from what they referred to as ‘your cave’ Tara and Quinn greeted you.

“Seems like you had fun last night, did you have any company over this time?” Quinn interrogated before sitting down on the white sofa. “You know I never-“

“We heard someone in your room last night, did you finally make progress with Ethan?” Tara, surprisingly not fumbling her words, questioned as she shook you by the shoulders enthusiastically.

“Oh come on guys you don’t seriously think… you heard someone in my room and didn’t say anything?” It finally dawned on you that they heard him, while you were passed out and thought you were fucking, great.

“What if it was ghostface? I could be dead right now!” Tara folded her arms, her mood noticeably more dull, “Did something happen that we should know about? Did you get a call?” Again, you froze, standing there with your mouth gaped open as you looked into the eyes of someone you considered family.

“No I just- come on you guys know I’d never have someone with me. I was probably just drunk and stumbling around my room looking for something.” You rambled before walking into the kitchen to grab a bottle of water, still questioning why you hadn’t told her. Yes you had a small obsession with the boy, but it was much more than that now. Your face turned a light shade of red when you read his note, your heart swelled at the thought of him sneaking into your room to return your knife. The sight of him staring down at you in the cold dark alley, you could smell the blood and cologne on his skin from how close-

“Earth to Y/N! Hello Hi sweetie we need to get going, we’re meeting up with the boys for lunch.” Quinn said as she waved her hand in front of your face before walking towards the apartment door where Tara already stood. You quickly grabbed your water and followed the two girls out of the door trying to ignore your internal moral battle.

You waited in the mostly empty quad at a bench, Sam had yet to turn up and Chad had gotten here shortly after Mindy and Anika. Only one you were missing was the person you were sweating bullets about. You sat patiently, quietly, observantly, until your phone dinged. By now the group was over their usual paranoia but when you saw it was from Ethan you swiped it away at first… instantly regretting it.

“It’s rude to ignore people,” a whisper from your right side startled you, causing you to jump forward. By the time you turned around and the group noticed his presence he was standing up right, acting innocent like he didn’t scare the shit out of you.

“Ethan! Took you long enough shit, were you jacking off in the shower?” Chad joked as he slung his arm around the now quiet boy.

“Oh- ew! Grow up, can’t you talk about anything besides your dicks?” Mindy expressed quite passionately before beginning to lead the group to a small restaurant.

Sorry to end it so abruptly i genuinely needed to put this out so i could take my time perfecting the last half so hoped you like it let me know what you would want in part 2 i might take some notes. heres my masterlist if you wanna check that out!

#fanfic #ethan landry #ghost face #ghostface x reader #ethan landry smut #ethan landry x y/n #ethan landry x you #ethan landry x reader #ghostface smut #ghostface ethan #ghostface x you #Spotify #demontonic #D3M0NT0N1C

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iridessence · 9 months

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I would like to take a moment to acknowledge myself and say that I am elated and proud to have manifested some of my major goals since 2018-2019. Basically before then, 2014-16 I struggled with depression and suicidal ideation quite frequently due to not having steady income, as jobs in retail seemed the only available and “safe” options, but long shifts standing at a registers or posts were damagingly hard on my body. In 2017 I got a desk job that set me on the path of financial stability and reduced physical load, which did absolute wonders for my mental health but it was an absolute blight to my existence over time due to terrible management and the usual corporate garbage. I knew that staying there was fine for a time but not sustainable in the long run, so change must come eventually.

also around then, I continued to explore self portraiture and personal style but I really wanted to perform/create Burlesque acts and book them, and invest in and actually have choreography/technique and beautiful costume pieces that looked like the visions refining themselves in my head through research. I was also perpetually struggling in the dating sphere with the deficit of romantic fulfillment that I deeply wanted. and while they weren’t hostile, things were definitely weird with my family (dysfunctional, literal small town energy, upset that I didn’t want to be around them more in the suburbs but lots of interpersonal toxicity and lack of emotional growth).

I knew that in the coming years I wanted to…

quit my soul sucking job and set out to be a full-time or at least professional level burlesque performer, creating the qualitative and classic show girl acts I dream to see on stage

work on the floor at a boutique or mom-and-pop type shop that sells goods or services that are interesting to me, especially aesthetically, such as an antique shop or a jewelry boutique etc., but a place where I could sit intermittently as needed for my physical disability. Also, ideally it would be a position where I could express myself through style at my choosing and it would be received well, and also my hours would not be very early or very late.

find a loving and supporting partner who I could lavish equal amounts of love and support on to, live with and hopefully marry

Achieve/maintain financial stability enough that I have a reduced risk for homelessness and sometimes treat myself to things that I enjoy.

Figure out why the relationship with my family was such a struggle and do things within my power and desire to fix it.

In a world that isn’t a corporate machine devoid of empathy, none of that seems like a tall order to ask… but I live in America so… It took some time, but I’m starting to see the fruits and returns. Honestly sometimes things feel like a blur and I’m not exactly sure I could say there was a huge system to what I did overtime to make it work, but I know the work was there.

As of today, September 9, 2023:

I am a respected professional burlesque performer with costumes I figuratively gag over and acts that come closer and closer to hitting the aesthetic nail on the head for what I want to embody. (I quit that shitty desk job at the beginning of 2019 and haven’t looked back since. Sent a whole ass company wide message with a long and detailed “fuck you” too.😂🙈)

i’ve managed through burlesque, social media work, donations and savings, and —since the global pandemic—,odd jobs and grants/minimal loans, to continuously pay rent and ward off homelessness

I live with the love of my life, to whom I am engaged and actively planning our wedding (we looked at a venue yesterday!)

I’ve helped my mom on the growth of her emotional intelligence and commitment to learning more about values under the race, gender, and sexuality umbrella, as well pushed her to examine the enabling and entitlement dynamics with her adult children that take advantage of her. While my relationship with my brother and sister is not great, my relationship with my mom has been steadily getting better since the pandemic. we had a breakthrough at the beginning of this year where she acknowledged and apologized for guilt tripping me for not being around the family more, when I was (she quoted) “actually protecting myself like she should have been.”

and litcherally within the past week I was offered the job at a local boutique I interviewed with a year ago and didn’t get, and I signed an offer letter to begin work within the month.

To say I’m happy with the way things look right now is an understatement. The world still terrifies me, but I have no choice but to carve out a sliver of its beautiful experiences for myself, and I am doing just that. It may not be perfection, but it’s pretty damn good and I’m going to do everything in my power to keep it that way and make it even better. I am living my ancestors' wildest dreams!!

for anyone reading who might be struggling right now to make things work, I hope you hold on to hope that it can get better. A beautiful life is possible even on this hell scape, even for the marginalized.

#text post #life #faq #long post #well long-ish

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liagazed · 2 years

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𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐩𝐬 , 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐩𝐬 ; 𝒇. 𝒉𝒂𝒓𝒈𝒓𝒆𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒔

summary: five and (y/n) decided to "chat" in the bathroom after coming back from the 1960s timeline.

tags: five x gn!reader. makeout session. kind of fluffy. 15+. implication of smut, but no actual sexual intercourse. takes place in the beginning of season three.

a/n: i wrote this at 5am while sleep deprived, i'm sorry if it's weird

word count: 1.4k

April 3rd. It was the day after coming back to your designated timeline. Well, not exactly.

Either way, you and Five's dysfunctional family needed a break after trying to save the world from coming to an end twice in the span of a month. But mainly you and Five, after enduring years of torture from the spending time– forty five years– in the apocalypse and the commision. So for the 58 year old teenagers, a break was very well deserved.

Everyone else was sleeping, so Five decided to take you to the bathroom to "chat".

He'd closed the door, locking it, and kissed you softly, and you obviously kissed back. The kiss was sweet and passionate, becoming slower and more heated as Five pressed you against the counter gently. His hands roamed your back and sides, eventually landing on your waist. You'd situated your hands on his shoulders, already moving a hand to fiddle with the hair on the nape of his neck.

Five slowly lowered his hands, positioning them on the back of your thighs as he brought your body closer to his, away from the counter.

"Jump." He mumbled against your lips, and you obliged. You wrapped either of your legs around his waist, Five gripping your thighs a little harsher to hold you tighter and sit you down on the empty space on the counter he had cleared prior to your visit from your own room.

Five pulled away from your lips the slightest bit, admiring you as he did. "Missed you." He flashed you a breathless smirk.

"We were separated by rooms for a couple of hours, Five." You responded, a hand making its way up to Five's hair, messing with already disheveled hair at the top.

"That's way too long." Five replied, pressing his lips against yours harsher than before, causing you to be taken aback a little bit, kissing back afterwards.

"Fuck, you're so perfect, you know that?" Five mumbled against your lips as he tilted his head to the side a little, deepening the kiss, his hands sliding under your shirt to rest on your bare waist.

You let out a muffled moan into Five's mouth, slowly pulling away to retrieve a hand from his neck and bring it to your mouth, covering it in embarrassment.

"Did you just–" Five asked, his eyebrows furrowing a little. "I might've" you replied, sounding muffled. Five just chuckled in response. "You're cute." Five removed your hand and replaced it with his lips, kissing your cheeks and forehead as well.

"Thanks," you mumbled with a shy smile, a roseate shade dusting your cheeks as you watched Five smile at you, a soft and endearing smile that could melt the hearts of anyone within a hundred feet from here.

Five was quick to bring his lips back to yours shortly after, but more gentle. This time, he let you lead him on, whether to carry on with your session, or to just go to sleep. You obviously wanted more, so kissed back harshly, a devilish grin now being plastered on Five's face, which you could feel against your lips.

Five got carried away, letting his tongue slip into your mouth, causing you to grip onto his hair tighter. He pulled away for a second, catching his breath as he did.

Five didn't hesitate to pull you back in for a kiss as soon as he could. You kissed back with the same amount of pressure he did, causing him to grip your waist tighter and pull himself closer to you. He placed a hand flat on your back under your shirt, rubbing small circles onto your back gently.

"My pretty baby." He murmured against your lips, your stomach tossing and turning as if it were a gymnast.

Five moved his free hand to rest on your thigh, gripping it slightly as he hovered over you a little.

Five pulled away slightly and admired you. He watched your every move as you pant in an attempt to catch your breath.

Five's lips find their way to your jaw, leaving a trail of kisses from there to behind your ear, which he knew was one of your weak spots. "Oh, God, Five." You let out a quiet moan as he smirked against your skin, trailing kisses down your neck, marking the territory as his.

"Y-you're gonna leave marks," you whimpered under him, your hand massaging his scalp as you did, causing him to groan slightly.

"Good. You'd look so pretty with my marks on your neck, sweetheart." Five mumbled into your skin, leaving a deep, crimson bruise on your neck that he soothed with his tongue. He admired his work with a grin, continuing to leave a trail of sloppy kisses down your neck.

You fumbled with the hem of his button-up pyjama shirt as he kissed his way back up your neck, eyes meeting with yours once he was done.

He placed a hand on your cheek, the other on your waist as he flashed a soft grin again. That damned grin. "I'm glad that since we're officially retired, we can do this now." He said as he leaned forward and planted a kiss on your forehead. "Yeah, me too." You replied, glancing at his lips when you did. Five smirked at that and began to kiss you once more.

Jeez, do you ever get tired?

You kissed Five hard, grabbing his collar to pull him closer. He grabbed your hips and pulled them closer to his own, shifting a little in front of you.

You fumbled with the first button on his shirt, undoing it, along with the second one. Five messed with the waistband of your pants, slightly moving it down. You grinned into Five's mouth, thinking you were about to have the time of your life, until–-

"HEY!" you and Five both got startled with the machine gun knocking at the door. "FIVE, GET OUT, I HAVE TO TAKE A SHIT!" someone yelled. It was Diego. "AND I AIN'T USING NATURE'S BATHROOM!"

"WE'RE BUSY, COME BACK LATER," Five responded as he continued to kiss you slowly, a low, delighted hum being released against your lips.

"We're– IS (Y/N) IN THERE?" Diego asked loudly once again, but this time, you heard groans coming from Klaus and Luther, so you chuckled to yourself as you pulled away from Five's lips. "Yeah, I am." You smiled as you turned your head to face the door, causing Five to pout at you.

"STOP SCREWING, AND GET OUT SO I CAN PISS!" Diego yelled, knocking at the door maniacally again.

"We AREN'T SCREWING!" Five replied. "We were about to," Five smirked at you, "But you interrupted us!"

"Ew, gross, just get out." Diego retorted in disgust, rattling the door knob.

"Why must you be so loud? It's two am!" you heard Luther let out a muffled groan.

"Let them fuck in the bathroom, use the outside one, it's not all that bad" Klaus replied. "Let them be horndogs!"

"No! They can be horndogs later, I have to shit!" Diego rattled the door knob harder then before.

"Okay, okay, fine, we're going." You aforementioned rapidly, looking Five in the eyes, then his lips, and back to his eyes.

Five's annoyed expression softened once he looked at you. "We can continue this later, my love," he spoke softly, pressing a gentle kiss to your lips.

Five helped you off of the counter, readjusting your clothes after and fixing your hair, along with Five's. You both stood in front of the mirror as you fixed yourselves, Five buttoning his shirt again as you straightened out your clothes, Five sending you a wink as you got composed, causing you to smile and blush.

You unlocked the door and opened it, eyes being met with an unhappy Wish™ version of batman, Diego fuckin' Hargreeves, who had interrupted your time with Five Hargreeves.

"Good morning, pendejo." You said, standing in the doorway as Five stood behind you, wrapping an arm around your waist.

"Yeah, yeah, get out– is that a hickey?" He asked as he pointed to the mark on your neck Five had made. You were quick to cover the mark, Five smirking as you did.

"Nope, go take your shit." you walked off as you pushed Diego into the bathroom. "It is a hickey." Five whispered with a devilish grin as Diego walked in, shaking his head as he shut the door and locked it.

You and Five walked away from the door frame and stood elsewhere in the room, Five wrapping his arms around your waist and placing his head on your shoulder. "Let's go to sleep, shall we?" He murmured softly against your skin, placing a gentle kiss on your hickey. "We can continue that later, sweetheart." Five whispered into your ear, kissing the shell of it gently, sending shivers down your spine.

"O-okay." You chuckled nervously. ❦︎

a/n pt. 2:

Have a good day idiots, ily <3

- vee ☕

#the umbrella academy #five x reader #five x y/n #five hargreaves x reader #five hargreeves #tua season 3 #tuaedit #multi fandom #fanfic #klaus hargreeves #tua luther #luther hargreeves #diego hargreeves #tua season three #tua x reader #tua diego

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