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#like i said i really genuinely do not like marvel knights spider-man and i think millar is a bad writer
softgrungeprophet · 1 year
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I know I said I don't like MK:SM, and I don't,
BUT
this single panel lives in my head rent free
(Peter Parker and Mac Gargan in Marvel Knights: Spider-Man #9)
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evilwickedme · 1 year
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🔥 any topic of your choice
I think we need to be more forgiving of people who are new to comics. Comics are a really inaccessible medium and especially if you're trying to get into one of the big two companies you're inevitably going to be confused and uninformed. I've been reading DC comics for about a year now (not including watchmen or wonder woman by Greg Rucka which I read years ago but didn't manage to get me into DC), and I've only really been a part of the fandom since July or August, and it's still really confusing and hard to tell what's fanon and what's canon. I have so many characters I haven't managed to read for at all despite wanting to, or only a handful of issues, or only minor appearances. I'd love to have read every single one of Roy Harper's pre-52 appearances but it's just not feasible, especially since DC particularly is inaccessible in another way - their app is only available to US residents. If you want to pay for comics then it's going to be expensive, even digitally - I managed to get Young Justice books 1-3 through comixology, which in itself is not a cheap subscription, but then the rest of the series is $20 a pop!! That's a lot of money!! And in print books go wayyyy higher, or even if they don't cost that much if you're buying a bunch then it's going to get expensive. But even if you're not paying it's confusing to just jump into something like this - don't get me wrong, this is what I've done both with marvel in 2015 and in DC last year, but it's not an easy thing to do and at first you're going to be fucking baffled. You're never going to know everything, it's not physically possible. Even for marvel, which, again, I've been reading since 2015, I haven't exactly come close to reading everything. I haven't even read every Deadpool comic, not even his main titles! I want to read gwenpool and moon knight and daredevil and non-spider-verse-related Spider-Man stories but it's just really fucking difficult to prioritize, not to mention keeping up with current runs.
And I'm doing my best, right? Like I recently finally managed to start reading superfam comics, and last year I started reading x men and scarlet witch, and as I said above I've been reading young justice, and I'm keeping up with like a dozen or more ongoings, and it's so fucking hard and I'm lucky to have enough disposable income and free time to do this. And people have been genuinely fucking mean to me. Like really super fucking dismissive bc how dare I ship the obvious most popular ship and not this more niche one when I haven't even read an appearance of that character!! How dare I not know everything about this run when I haven't gotten to that run yet bc I'm still trying to even track it down!! I can't prioritize comics I can't get my hands on when I have a shelf and a half of DC comics and I've only read about a third of it!!!
And it's worse for people who don't have the money and free time that I do . My parents pay my fucking rent and I only work part time, okay, I'm in a really privileged position. Some people are only reading the DC webtoons or only watching the young justice TV show and yeah it's frustrating to see so many people who don't know your favorite characters as much as you do, but I've been a Deadpool fan for close to eight years now and I've never gone onto anybody's page and told them that they're interpretation is bad and they should feel bad, I keep that shit to myself or AT WORST I complain to my friends in DMs or WhatsApp messages or whatever. The only stuff like this I complain about in public is stuff I consider genuinely harmful (the pit rage trope for Jason for example) or upon specific prompting, and even then I do it on MY blog, not somebody else's, and I don't tag it so people looking for content that they enjoy don't have to see it.
Like... Basically I feel like people are too harsh on casual, peripheral fans, or people who are new to the material, or even people who aren't new to comics but just don't know as much as you. A lot of people don't have any other options. You don't have to like the content they make. But actively going into their content or constantly making negative content about them is exhausting. I'm really tired of constantly seeing memes about how terrible batfam stans are. I don't even disagree, I just think you're annoying. But I don't reblog those posts just to shit on op. Maybe some of y'all should consider it.
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thisisthewaytomando · 2 years
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adored this video. I have to say, I agree with most of what he said (&I love video essays) I wonder what his thoughts are regarding the she hulk finale lmao
My opinion is this:
I’ve been a fan of the MCU for most of my life. But it has (imo) deteriorated as he mentions in the video above. I don’t think I could’ve put my sentiments as eloquently tho. I know people have been ranking MCU movies/tv shows for this phase so I’m going to do that (mostly because I can). These are all my opinions and I discuss this with respect (as I said I’ve been a fan like my whole life & I still am rn)
TV/Disney Plus shows
1. moon knight (although it feels separate from the MCU, & I kinda like that )
2. hawkeye (genuinely funny & I enjoyed it)
3. Loki (it’s Loki (#1) and 2 idk I enjoyed it)
4. What if (fascinated me & I’ve read marvel zombie comics although I do know that’s a separate project)
5. Wandavision (last episodes were the best imo, I was wondering what was going on at first )
6. The Falcon & Winter Soldier (Bucky and Sam are my favorite characters but this show sucked sorry not sorry)
7. Ms Marvel (cringey, I know it’s not for my age group but i thought it was kinda boring)
8. I am groot (respectfully wtf)
9. She-hulk (trainwreck, hated pretty much every second of it, with the exception of daredevil of course, imo they did her character dirty. I like Jen but this was just terrible )
MCU Phase 4 Movies (wakanda forever tbd)
1. Shang Chi (phenomenal)
2. Spider-Man No Way Home (I LOVE Spider-Man although Andrew Garfield is my fave)
3. multiverse of madness (more horror, liked it)
4. Black Widow (sorry but meh)
5. Eternals (😡🤮, felt like DC knockoff (and I’m not a DC fan) & I really didn’t like it, was disappointed bc I thought I would )
6. Thor Love & Thunder (🤮, absolutely horrendous)
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The Mask 1994
*I finally wrote the whole thing. I finally watched the movie that involved something I’ve been talking about A LOT. I think this took about an hour since I finished the movie. Forgot to mention Charlie.*
I wanna make this clear, even before I watched movie or ever writing this. I am legitimately a stupid and lazy person. Because my mom told me about this, and last week, my dad rented A Quiet Place Part 2. When I was trying to go to sleep but was looking up movies...I literally forgot my tv can do that too...and that I can rent or buy a movie...I rented the movie this morning, and deleted it afterwards...after all that talk...I could’ve done that...wow. I should do that more considering some movies I wanna see or like. Not too much though. My tv has DirecTV. Just a heads up.
But a few or couple of minutes ago, I finally watched The Mask film from 1994. This post is gonna be filled with spoilers and it’s gonna get long. Gonna be kind of a review. My overall thoughts on it. This was my first reaction to the whole movie.
I’d just wanna talk about this too. I like comic books, I like comic book movies. Mainly my favorites are ones like all of Zack Snyder’s DCEU movies, Spider-Man 1 & 2, The Suicide Squad 2021, Wonder Woman 2017, The Dark Knight(Despite whatever issues I have with it), and Joker 2019. Yeah, those are mainly DC films and two Marvel related ones. I don’t even mind Spider-Man 3 as well. I also forgot Dredd 2012 is another one of my favorites. Along with Batman 1989.
I was hoping The Mask could make that list of favorites. Because I read the comics first. I don’t think I ever watch the movie fully as a kid MAYBE. I’m a fan of the comics, I know this movie was gonna be a lighter take on the series. 
In a nutshell...I liked it. It’s possible it will be on that list of favorite CBM’s...but I want to talk about it. I’ll also admit I think what got me interested in seeing this film and this series was me liking Jim Carrey as Ace Ventura...now, let’s get to the point.
Yeah, I liked it. I thought the movie was genuinely entertaining. Despite seeing some clips before. But also Ryan Hollinger’s video about it. Revealing the ending, the twist, and other stuff. But I didn’t wanna watch more more that I haven’t seen yet.
I will be honest, it still made me laugh. Even some scenes I already have seen. I will admit, the Cuban Pete scene is actually one of my favorites. XD But what also surprised me is that at times, despite being a funny film. It can genuinely be touching in a way. And I am mainly talking about the developing relationship between Stanley and Tina.
I just wanna talk about the characters right now. I’ll just admit unless I haven’t already. I’m a Jim Carrey fan. Mainly because of his more goofier roles. Particularly his roles from the Ace Ventura movies, Liar Liar, and especially Sonic The Hedgehog. I also will admit this, Jim Carry nails playing Big Head or who they call...The Mask in this movie...I’ll nitpick about that later.
But yeah, Jim’s entertaining as Big Head in this film. He does make me laugh. But I think another role he does well despite there are some sillier moments, which is fine. I feel like in a way, Stanley Ipkiss in this version, is maybe one of his more normal roles. But I know I’m wrong considering whatever other roles he’s in. He portrays a likable good guy who’s sadly mainly pushed around. Which is quite the difference from the comics, except being pushed around. But that’s another topic. Yet for this story, even if maybe Stanley’s name could be changed. But him being a genuinely kind guy works for this story.
Even before I saw the movie, learning more about this version about the character. I can relate to Stanley in some ways honestly. Which is something that I like. He basically shines as a protagonist. 
He portrays both sides well. Despite at times...honestly, this Stanley is wacky. I shouldn’t be judging. Jim does a good stuff with what he played, and he’s the highlight of this movie. He also delivers possibly my favorite Jim Carrey line of all time now. Sorry if I get this wrong. I was looking for a clip of it to help me.
“Daddy’s gonna go kick some ass”. A literal line from Jim Carrey in this movie and I love it. He even brings a pistol with him.
I also wanna admit Peter Greene as Dorian is pretty good as a villain. The dude can be threatening and he works with what he is given. And he’s effective as an antagonist. I just wanna admit that I swear, one of these guys. One of them could’ve Walter in a way and I just think that could’ve been possible. But I’m not sure. Just one of Dorian’s henchmen looked like a huge guy. It just got me thinking about Walter from the comics.
Will admit, I think Kellaway is fine. And I just found out Christopher Reeve was one of the actors considered for the role...damn. But again, Kellaway was fine. He’s more like a supporting character and again, this is like an origin story. I do feel bothered Lionel Ray wasn’t added but replaced with this Doyle character. I will admit that Doyle is silly, which is the point of his character. I guess the writers and director didn’t want two sensible cops or something. I like Kellaway alright, but I’ll always dig Lionel too.
I really wanted to get this point. I thought Cameron Diaz was good as Tina Carlyle and Amy Yasbeck as Peggy Brandt. I will admit, I do strangely like the subversion with Peggy in a way with it’s twist. I get the idea if that it was going for that theme of, “We all wear mask” and Peggy turning Stanley into the mob said a lot about her character. While Tina was genuinely the one that truly supported Stanley.
I think was surprised me more was the fact despite Peggy turned in Stanley for selfish purposes such as paying for her condo. Yet what surprised me more was she was actually concerned for Stanley being killed, and didn’t want him hurt...which explains even more why she stuck around in the cartoon. And honestly, it makes me glad the director took out that deleted scene of her getting killed. So she wasn’t that heartless.
Also...it made me think that...my ideas and changes towards her character...maybe hold some weight.
I’ll just put this out there too. Milo is great, one of my favorite fictional dogs maybe. Good dog.
Trying to think what else, the score was fine. But the licensed music was good or something. Overall, I think my negatives could be just...nitpicks. Such as the Big Head part I wanted to talk about. Listen, I understand this is a different version. I just feel it’s weird to call him, “The Mask” instead of Big Head. I know other characters mask in their name or something. But...some reasons, the name Big Head is there. I guess it’s because of the title or something.
Honestly, I think my negatives are more that it feels short. And maybe Stanley becoming Big Head a bit too early. I sound kind of stupid, I know. But this was the 90′s and whatever else. This was a different take on the comics. But I did genuinely like it. Maybe I’m just a bit attached to those comics. Despite knowing the changes they did.
But I will admit, considering the development for this film. And learning that it was meant to be a horror film. But the director Charles Russell found the violence in the source material to be off putting. So he made it less grim, and more fun. I’ve also read somewhere that trying to make comedy with that violence was difficult.
Back to the point, to be honest. I feel like for that time and age. A more light Mask film was maybe the best choice to go. And we wouldn’t have Jim Carrey in it. I do also wanna say, I feel like The Mask series, you can do a lot of it. You can have something dark with it, or maybe more lighter.
There are still some of those darker elements. Mainly considering the moments with the gangsters and all that. But I will admit, learning that Charles mostly directed horror films. I think it’s impressive he made a more family friendly film and it worked. 
I liked it, despite my love for the comics. I thought when writing this, maybe some folks reading this may think I sound like fans who read the comics who first experienced this movie. But the film isn’t bad, it’s just a different take and a pretty nice one at that.
And to be honest, as much as I would of loved to see an actual sequel. And not that bad film known as Son Of The Mask. I understand why Jim Carrey dropped out, and I would’ve loved to see Peggy back because the director planned to bring her back reformed. But I feel like this film works as a one off in a way. And there’s also the cartoon, which works fine as a sequel despite some differences. Yet...I’ll admit, I would’ve loved The Mask 2 if we got Jim Carrey as Stanley again fighting against maybe someone like Walter.
The Mask 1994 is a good film. Despite changes from the source material, but the changes for this vision work. It’s cool this film has a cult following, and the fact I have used elements and story beats from it for The Mask Rebirth stuff I’ve been talking about. Even before watched this whole movie.
It’s a genuine fun flick. But I’m hoping down the line, if Warner Bros stops being fucking stupid with how they run things. Maybe we’ll get a reboot or how about an animated film that seems more true to the source material. 
I know The Mask/Big Head doesn’t have a big legacy such as the likes of Superman, Batman, and Spider-Man. But I do think this series could be reimagined and expanded upon. Using elements not only from the original comics, but even the movie and cartoon. 
And...despite it was because of Ace Ventura...I would like to thank @kaijuguy19 for being such a supportive dude, and talking about this franchise with me. Including wanting to talk about this movie long ago when I haven’t seen it. But I want to say...no...he’s one of the big reasons why I’m a fan. Because he’s one of the only guys I know who’s a fan. It started with Ace Ventura, but it was because of talking with Kaijuguy that I guess things started to escalate. So thanks man for talking about this stuff with me.
Also, Charlie was silly and he was fine as a character. I forgot about that dude despite wanting to talk about him. Gonna tag him too in case. Charlie schumaker
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athicfa · 3 years
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Marc Spector: Moon Knight Vol 1 #4 Marc Spector: Moon Knight Vol 1 #5 Spectacular Spider-Man Vol 1 #155 Spectacular Spider-Man Vol 1 #156 Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #329 Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #330 Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #331 Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #335 Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #337 Marvel Comics Presents Vol 1 #57 Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #341 Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #342 Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #343 Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #346 Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #347
Marc Spector: Moon Knight Vol 1 #4
Apparently, at least from reviews and comments I’ve seen online, Moon Knight fans generally hate this run so my expectations are low. I’m only here for Felicia anyway.
this issue exists solely so Felicia Hardy can serve us this look
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Marc Spector: Moon Knight Vol 1 #5
yeah that was awful
Spectacular Spider-Man Vol 1 #155
Did they drop the “Peter Parker” tag from the title of this series? Looks like it.
I thought they ended the gang war several issues back? k then
Fe’s just a cameo and the rest of this issue is just Weird
Spectacular Spider-Man Vol 1 #156
oh no have we entered demented redneck territory? dude I’m from Arkansas and this is one of my least favorite tropes EVER. The only acceptable version of the demented redneck trope is in RE7.
primitive existence??? because they live in log cabins and play the banjo??? man fuck you, writers, from the bottom of my primitive southern heart
dude they forgot her sleeve
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“I know you Gov’ment men and yORE lies” yeah nvm that’s pretty accurate
If you want to know how to NOT write a southern accent, read this issue. It’s insulting. This isn’t even the south it’s PENNSYLVANIA WHAT ARE THEY DOING
This is bad ED rep too. As if they couldn’t make it worse.
Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #329
Tri-Sentinel? Oh this sounds like a bad idea.
MJ doing Queen shit as usual. Prepping for her “Secret Hospital” role. We stan.
AH so we’re in the West Coast Avengers era? Neat.
LOKI WHAT ARE YOU DOING
why do they write Loki with a cockney accent?
Captain Universe? WHAT IN THE HELL
And here she is, showing up at the end of the issue for a cliffhanger with Flash. Because they really have to make her as vindictive and hateable as they can.
Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #330
we start with the Punisher blowing up an ambulance with a rocket launcher so everything is guaranteed to go downhill from this point
Felicia shows up to dinner with Flash and Peter’s going feral but can’t explain to anyone WHY he’s going feral because secret identity and all that jazz
OH MY GOD THAT’S HOW THEY KILL OFF EDDIE? OR AM I BEING SCAMMED WITH A FAKE DEATH AGAIN??? WHAT???????
I love you Aunt May
they break the fourth wall a lot in this and it’s always them going “haha that’s what YOU think Peter but we’re obviously going to make everything worse for you and you should know better you cheeky bastard”
Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #331
this is FUCKING AWFUL and I hate it so much
Felicia would NEVER put her hands on MJ like that. This is bullshit. Even if they’re trying to play her as a jealous ex, this is just STUPID. I hate everything about this story so much I’m about to have a fucking aneurysm istg.
oh so I was right Eddie’s fine he just faked his death
now some old lady just randomly slaps MJ WHAT??? second time she’s been physically assaulted in the same issue, and the third time in the past four issues I’ve read. WHAT THE FUCK MAN
they just really hate women I guess
Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #335
this is from #332 and I’m not talking about it bc It’s not relevant to Felicia but I just wanna say that this page was pretty cool
Hobgoblin looks genuinely freaky now
Aunt May is precious and needs to be protected at all costs
Flash’s outfit is a fucking crime
mmm Sinister Six is reforming and I couldn’t care less. that was anticlimactic.
Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #337
oh no Nathan’s dead. Poor May.
once again Fe’s serving LOOKS while Flash is dressed like the embodiment of glitter in the 80′s
him standing up for her is nice and all but Felicia would have already been throwing hands and handing out free kick vasectomies
Marvel Comics Presents Vol 1 #57
she broke into Versaille and is sleeping in the king’s bedchamber which, y’know, is actually pretty in character so I’m not complaining
Fisk is after her. Again.
that’s it. cute little story. now back to the main event.
Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #341
aaaaaand they’re taking Peter’s powers away because they obviously hate him
Felicia looks good. Flash is a neon mess. As always. Guys she would never date a guy that dresses like this I’m sorry but it’s true
MAY YOU SLY DOG I SEE YOU FLIRTING
Felicia being genuinely nice and friendly to MJ, as they should have had it from the start.
Flash is being really sweet and all but dude I still just can’t see it happening between them. He’s too much of a “jock”, to put it as nicely as I can. I know they’re trying to make it turn into a genuine relationship between the two of them but it just. This does not work.
Peter (as Spidey) is in trouble without his powers so Flash and Felicia rush in to help him and MJ is worried about all of them, even Felicia, which was a sweet moment.
“I can’t break your heart if you’re dead” sure Felicia not like you actually just don’t want Peter to die or anything
Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #342
they’ve promised me Felicia protecting Peter from the Scorpion this issue and they better give it to me or I might cry
Peter having to cope with not having his powers anymore is genuinely interesting but it’s hard to trust that they’ll do right by him based on how they ALWAYS do shit just to hurt him. And also having it be his choice is just??? Dude I doubt it. That doesn’t feel like a Peter Parker move AT ALL.
they keep having Felicia randomly refer to the Black Cat from a third person perspective and I hate it
she knows something’s wrong and she gets him to fess up to it
“Flash is a good guy and I wouldn’t never hurt him just to get back at you” REALLY MARVEL WHERE WAS THIS ENERGY AT, I DUNNO, THE BEGINNING OF THE ARC???
next day. Scorpion nabs Jameson. Felicia brings Peter’s Spidey suit to him, even though he’s powerless now. Nice that she still has faith in him but this is objectively a very bad decision from both of them.
Fe protecting Peter from Scorpion like they promised me??? FUCK YES
they’re letting her have a lot of nice moments in this fight I’m shocked they’re FINALLY showing her an ounce of respect
she kicked the shit out of Scorpion I LOVE it
Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #343
Actually love the dynamic reversal right now. It’s like when Felicia had no powers, except it’s Peter in her shoes now. Still hate how we got here but at least I can enjoy it reading again. For the most part.
AH THERE’S THE FAMOUS PHYSICS-DEFYING PURPLE DRESS
no but seriously she went to borrow jeans from MJ and came back with THIS
more badass Felicia moments so I have been placated. For now.
Why did they draw her with claw feet in one panel though when she’s supposed to have normal boots on lmfaoooo
he fiddles with Dr. Turner’s device and gets his powers back right as Felicia’s getting overwhelmed.
“At least they didn’t break my nose” followed by a cute little cheek rub, as she DESERVES
oof she’s in bad shape
the machine took her powers away somehow so...okay
so she’s gonna quit being the Black Cat? BULLSHIT. She was the Black Cat before she had powers. It’s something she’s NEVER gonna be able to give up, just like Peter can’t quit being Spiderman.
At least Felicia, Peter, and MJ are all on good terms now which is more than I expected from this awful arc.
Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #346
VENOM
she wants to come help Peter so I guess she’s NOT giving up the Black Cat completely like they said? Which...okay. But he won’t let her come help anyway because he knows she’ll get trashed by Venom.
Venom feels like a real threat which is great because most of the villain set-ups leading up to this have been lame af
Amazing Spider-Man Vol 1 #347
UH
Venom in the background of this is hella creepy
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Felicia and Flash are fighting bc she’s worried sick about Peter and pissed she can’t do anything, so she’s lashing out and refusing to go to some stupid concert with him. And then immediately changes her mind because what is consistency in a character am I right, Marvel?
May and Willie are cute
He had to fake his death to get Venom off his back and you know...I think I kind of like it. It was an unusual finish to a story but it does a good job at painting Venom as an unstoppable force, which will make his eventual defeat way more rewarding than most of the one-and-done villains that show up, get their asses kicked, and then disappear for thirty issues.
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I honestly would love to see Black Cat and MJ just hang out more. Because of the love triangle I’ve always heard about how much they ‘must’ hate each other, but honestly I could picture Pete waking up one day, finding MJ and Felicia in the living room having coffee and asking what she’s doing here and MJ just says, “Dude we meet up like twice a week to hang. We’re going bowling tonight.” or something.
They’re relationship is actually more complicated than simply being catty rivals or some such. 
The harsh truth is, for better or worse, writers pitted the pair against one another lightly in the 1980s, famously the first instance of this was in the iconic ASM #258, the issue both immediately after MJ reveals she knows who Peter is and where Peter learns the truth about the black costume.
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Initially the animosity was more on Felicia’s end than MJ’s, whether she meant it or not, she briefly felt Peter was better suited to Black Cat.
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MJ became Peter’s confidant not too long before he and Felicia broke up and when she was later reintroduced into the titles MJ became more clearly down on her. This is epitomized in Spec #119 (a great Felicia story).
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That issue also  ends though with MJ admitting she has complicated conflicting feelings towards Felicia, the complications of which are wrapped up in her complicated feelings for Peter. In the story Felicia single handily takes down Sabertooth.* In a sense she defended civilians and Peter in doing so and thus MJ is caught between admiration and jealousy.
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Their romantic rivalry becomes more out and out mean in Spec #123 and ASM #288 which follows up on that subplot. In the issues MJ resolves to set her and Peter’s ‘will they won’t they’ thing straight only find Felicia in Peter’s apartment (he saved her earlier that day and she needed somewhere to regroup). At the end of that adventure though Felicia basically forcibly stayed in Peter’s apartment so MJ was none too pleased to find her there when she showed up to make Peter breakfast in bed.**
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The pair remained in disdain of one another after this but also didn’t interact face to face again until after Pete and MJ got married and more specifically after Peter lost his cosmic powers defeating Tri-Sentinel. Felicia had learned Peter had gotten married and as revenge began dating Flash with the intention of breaking his heart to hurt Peter by proxy. She also delighted in makig him and MJ uncomfortable though.
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When MJ and Felicia interacted one-on-one Felicia was shockingly straight up assaulting MJ!
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At this point MJ obviously didn’t like Felicia but she was not giving as good as she got. Things began to shift not too long after in a storyline that saw Peter give up his powers and Felicia begin to develop genuine feelings for Flash. During this storyline Felicia stepped up and began acting as the muscle for the powerless Peter. MJ still didn’t like Peter was starting to reluctantly recognize her as more of an ally than an enemy. In particular the story ended with Felicia powerless and deciding to temporarily retire and date Flash sincerely.
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Whilst they weren’t exactly friends it did get to a point where MJ was okay with going on double dates with Flash and Felicia, considering the latter was no longer out to get her/hurt Flash/steal Peter away.
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However a significant turning point occurred in Web of Spider-Man #80. The story short is that Peter/Spidey is missing after he and Mj got attacked. MJ turns to Felicia for help, citing the fact she still cares for Peter and that’s common ground for them to work with for the moment. She gives her a tracking device Peter made to zero in on him. She even admits she’s out of her league on this front and it’s up to Felicia. Felicia of course helps save Spidey and whilst initially claims her locating him was due to their ‘connection’ (meaning their romantic history) she admits MJhelped witht he tracking device. The issue ends though with Felicia admitting that MJ’s device actually didn’t work, meaning Felicia simply let the Parker couple think it did out of kindness to MJ. This didn’t turn the pair into friends, but it showed they were clearly mellowing towards one another.
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This didn’t make them chummy as catty remarks still occurred during later interactions (noticably from MJ). I’m skipping over stuff to get to some highlights, the next of which is a big one. 
In Felicia’s first ever solo mini-seires MJ not only appears int he first issue but they are actually hanging out...together...as friends!
Or at least as frenemies. It’s clear there is still some underlying jealousy or jousting to be had, but they’re very open about it and Felicia is actively confiding in MJ, even talking about how she feels regarding Peter. And not just Peter in general, his then current state of being. This was back when Peter was unravelling due to the aftermath of the Robot Parents crap and becoming more anti-social and obsessive about his Spider-Man life, spending less time out of the costume. It got Felicia and MJ concerned. A very significant line of dialogue in this scene is MJ saying she’ll call Felicia later. It implies that they have hung out together before or are at least okay with doing do again in the near future. 
Also this was at Felicia’s home, so for MJ to have voluntarily gone to the home of the woman who once assaulted her says a lot about how things have changed.
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Again skipping over some stuff but the next big moment for MJ and Felicia came in Web of Spider-Man #125 where MJ once again calls upon Felicia’s aid to find Peter (though he’s not in trouble, she just needs him present). The circumstances are decidedly different from Web #80. There is no jousting going on. Partially this is due to their relationship having grown deeper but it’s also due to MJ being pregnant and amidst the chaos of the time (Peter was on trial for murder, Aunt May had just died and MJ had been recently abducted by Kaine) she was clearly feeling very vulnerable. 
Vulnerable enough in fact that Felicia can clearly tell MJ is upset and outright hugs her, offering some support and comfort. 
This time Felicia isn’t seeking out Peter less because she cares for him and more because she wants to help MJ and the baby. If ever there was a moment clearly demarking the pair had fully transitioned into real friendship, this was it. 
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Whilst MJ and Felicia don’t directly interact in Web #128 Peter makes a reference to MJ and Felicia talking on the phone for hours.
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Skipping waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay ahead now. The tl:dr is that Felicia clearly began to develop some feelings for Peter again during Howard Mackie’s run. This became more significantly a factor in the Evil that Men Do Limited Series where Felicia is putting the movies on Peter and also refers to MJ derogatorily. 
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Something to note about Evil that Men do is that it gets a lot of details wrong and it’s continuity is wonky. the first half came out when Peter and MJ were seperated, but the second half came out years later and used then contemporary continuity from when Peter and MJ would’ve been back together. The important thing to note is Felicia went back to having the hots for Spider-Man and also being down on MJ
To my recollection the next time I recall MJ and Felicia having a significant interaction was in Marvel Knights: Spider-Man #5. In the issue Felicia has rescued Peter from the Vulture and is helping him investigate Aunt may’s recent kidnapping. Peter was badly beat up so Felicia and Mj were nursing him back to health. The scene where Peter wakes up clearly conveys that there is some tension and competitivness going on between MJ and Felicia even though they are talking in a friendly manner to one another. When Felicia leaves MJ looked really bummed out, which might’e been due to some insecurities regarding Felicia or because of their financial troubles at the time (she was keeping them from Peter).
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Later on in Marvel Knights #10, when Peter has resolved to break Norman Osborn out of jail in order to save Aunt May, Felicia going along with him for this, MJ blows up at Felicia and basically tells her to back off from Peter.
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In defence of MJ here, Norman Osborn has pushed them to the edge big time so I think she’s having a major wobble regarding Black Cat.
Anyway, she’s not wrong about Felicia as the remaining issues of the arc make it clear that Felicia is absolutely in love with Peter again if Evil that Men Do didn’t make that clear enough.
Next up in Spider-Man: Breakout #2, MJ is similarly pissed off about Peter contacting Felicia for help tracking down the U-Foes.
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Frankly...I find this instance rather out of character but I thought I might as well mention it.
Then we have Spider-Man Unlimited volume 3 #14. In this issue, as payback for helping him bust out Norman Osborn, Felicia demands Spider-Man help her steal something from Doctor Doom. Peter isn’t happy about this until it turns out that the item in question was a spider tracer with his finger prints on it, meaning Felicia was trying to once again protect Peter. MJ wasn’t happy to find out Peter was hanging out with Felicia but acknwoeldged she helped protect them.
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The next notable interaction was during Civil War when Peter was unmasked, the Parkers were fugitives and Peter was half dead from a beating via the Rhino. Felicia upon learning of this sought out the Parkers and volunteered to even the score with Rhino. When all is said and done, MJ asks Felicia if she wants to give Peter a message from her.
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We then transition into shitty post-OMD continuity and frankly I’m not touching 90% of that sans one notable story (Web of Spider-Man volume 2 #11-12) in which Felicia, who has totally forgotten who MJ and Peter Parker are, nevertheless befriends MJ after an adventure to save Peter.
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I bring up this story simply because your original question was regarding MJ and Felicia friendship.
This story’s canonicity can be debated for a few reasons, it doesn’t make sense in general because the mindwipe was asinine shit and it has 0 follow up. In fact it doesn’t even really jive with later appearances of MJ or Felicia. It is amusing though that it completes a sort of trilogy wherein MJ and Felicia become more friendly in Web of Spider-Man.
Anyway, that brings you pretty much up to date.
Essentially there are two distinct eras for MJ and Felicia’s relationship. The 1980s-1990s where they have a clear arc transitioning from acquaintances who’re not that fond of one another to rivals to frenemies to outright friends. 
Then you have the 2000s and beyond which pits the two against one another again but in a very different dynamic to before as MJ is Peter’s wife and recognizes Felicia’s as an ally.
It’s not impossible to reconcile the two narratively but I’m not going to do that here. 
I think the second era might’ve been done in order to inject more tension into the Spider Marriage and in fairness, it did work. It was dramatic.
But I personally prefer the second era much more as it portrays a clear character arc. As a bonus I should mention that, since it diverged from Spider-Man continuity in the late 1990s, in Spider-Girl MJ and Felicia’s relationship continued to develop in a friendly manner to the point where Felicia would pay Mj a visit in her office and the pair would chat about their daughters and their mutual problems. In MJ’s case a difficult pregnancy and in Felicia’s her rebellious daughter who wasn’t fond of her same sex partner.
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To bring this right around to your OP, the scenes of friendship have more or less happened in canon and in stories that are pseudo canon. 
*Bear in mind this was the same decade where Sabertooth participated in the infamous Mutant Massacre storyline where he and his peers mass slaughtered a bunch of defenceless mutants. Readers knew he was no pushover.  
**Because you see according to Joe Quesada, Steve Wacker, Dan Slott et al Mary Jane was clearly not dating Peter at this time and I think we’ve all brought groceries to our ex’s apartment (that we own a key to) in order to make them breakfast in bed. It’s the single most platonic gesture possible.
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I WANT TO TALK ABOUT THIS
I have seen plenty of hot takes and crummy opinions about this situation and I wanna talk about it.
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HOW THEY ARE NOW: WHAT IS THIS?
These are some new “hip” “hello-fellow-kids” teen superheroes by Marvel. ““Safespace”” (who i’ll call “Pink” for now) is a “big, burly, sort of stereotypical jock” as described by their official bio and can create force fields for anyone but himself. ““Snowflake”” (who i’ll call “Blue” for now) is non-binary and can create ice shuriken. From the bio, we know that their story will be them dealing with the social issues surrounding the non binary community.
This would be good IF that wasn’t the only characterization they had. Instead, Blue and Pink are described in their bio as being obnoxious social geniuses, “hyper aware of modern culture and optics”, and just for extra “rEliaBiLITy”, as quoted from their official bio, “They’re probably streaming this.” They feel like what older people think is cool with the kids, like a PSA mascot who punches drug addiction in the face and flies away with his catchphrase “Don’t do drugs, Fam!” or “Drugs are NOT LIT, ok boomer?”
Correct me if i’m wrong, but I’m pretty sure nobody would want the only major representatives of their community in an otherwise oppressive and excessively masculine field to be unlikable douche bags. Why can’t they just be normal, maybe even (heavens forbid) LIKABLE characters with real human emotions and experiences?
We don’t have much more than their bio’s to draw from but we do have a picture and you know what they say, “A picture is worth a thousand words.”
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THIS is OFFICIAL ART from the OFFICIAL WEBSITE!
WTH!?
Correct me if i’m wrong, but THIS looks like a weak, frail, surprisingly feminine non-binary person turning to their strong, confident, masculine partner for comfort and protection because they’re too weak to face their own problems. Correct me if I’m wrong, but I thought the nature of safe spaces is not to patronize and baby people but to support and encourage.
This is ENTIRELY CONTRARY to the message Marvel is trying to put forth! If they’re trying to support and display the community as strong and worthy of recognition, THIS is not doing that AT ALL! What’s gonna happen is comic readers uneducated in this field will see this character, hate them because they’re unlikable, and see non-binary people as weak and in need of a masculine pillar of protection.
This is HORRIBLE representation.
I would like to propose what they COULD have done and maybe, still can be done to save these characters.
FIXING THEM: PHYSICALLY
I have seen many videos critiquing and bashing these characters and I found them to be … misguided (I won’t name names). People have expressed dissatisfaction with their powers and designs, comparing them to other marvel heroes.
This is unfair. these characters are just kids. they don’t have to have Hulk or even spider man level power. They are crime fighting teens, working the small time, not universe-devouring god-killers. I think these limited powers are cool and interesting. They necessitate creative and interesting combat and problem solving.
In action it could be like this, Blue is agile and mainly on offense, dealing tons of damage and applying pressure, hardly worrying about defense. This is because Pink runs alongside them, keeping up and fending for himself as he casts barriers for Blue when necessary based off their psychic synchronization.
Alternatively, Pink could be on the offense while Blue darts around, getting in the enemies way so that Pink could cast a barrier over Blue. It would effectively be an agile shield orbiting and protecting Pink who deals massive damage without much concern in regards to defense. Blue could keep up some pressure and add chip damage from behind the barrier with their shuriken.
Their design on the other hand, is honestly dumb
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They’ve got soft, boring silhouettes that are far too similar. The skin tight clothes are classic marvel style but are super outdated and honestly the worst. The matching hair is dumb and stupid.
I have seen some alternate designs by other more talented artists. Unfortunately, some of them are horrible and betray the characters and their overall message.
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It’s very well made and the artist is super talented, but it plays into the hyper sexual old Marvel comics and makes Blue ultra feminine, something i’m sure the original artist and writer where desperate not to do, instead making Blue into an amorphous lump.
I have made my own redesign that I hope is closer to the writer and artist’s vision.
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I gave them stark contrast and distinguished silhouettes. I tried hard to give the two of them more personality. Hopefully, you can all agree that it’s better than the original.
That was pretty simple, but now, I’ve got to do something about their douchbagieness
FIXING THEM: CHARACTER-WISE
To begin, let’s get better names. I saw some awesome new names from SpyV on youtube in their video “Redesigning “Snowflake” and “Safespace” | Marvel’s New Warriors Blunder”. The names they used were “Hail” for “Snowflake” and “Haven” for “Safespace”.
Now for their story. I don’t want them to feel like hokey PSA mascots, spouting slogans to the youth like “Be nice” or “Don’t be homophobic”. I want them to be actual people and characters.
These two are students at highschool. (grade 11/12) Haven is a crowd pleasing jock, valued for his physical ability and his participation on the football team. Though not exceptional, his stature and teamwork skills make him an invaluable asset that everyone loves out of necessity more than anything else.
Hail is as witty, snappy, confident person who stands up for their immediate friend group and the LGBT+ community in their school. They are still subject to the social conflicts and abuse that arise due to being non-binary in the socially harsh highschool environment. Due to the constant micro-aggression, Hail has grown abrasive and unapproachable as a self defense mechanism. The only person they can be genuine with is their brother, Haven.
These two share a psychic bond that allows a deep level of emotional sympathy between the two. Hail vents to Haven and relies on his emotional support. Haven tries his best to help but Hail’s circumstance is so different from his own that he can’t do much more than listen and accept Hail for who they are. Haven provides a safe space where Hail can be genuine, recuperate, and process their emotions during the tumultuous time that is highschool.
Hail is supported by Haven’s acceptance rather than his confidence and masculinity. Haven never white-knights for Hail and tries to solves their problems for them but, rather, provides support, acceptance, and encouragement, allowing Hail to fight their own battles.
Maybe, later on in their arc -  hear me out here - Haven discovers that he is gay and is thus ostracized by his peers at school and their roles are reversed. Hail must be a supportive and encouraging figure for Haven as his world changes around him.
In regards to their super hero team, perhaps someone in the team could act as a foil to Hail, being maybe not so subtly anti-LGBT+.(*cough*cough-screentime-cough*cough*) Maybe Haven is gay for one of the other members (B negative maybe?) and the feeling arn’t mutual and it’s kinda awkward but that’s the whole point. Sometimes, a crush is just a crush and it’s not meant to be and that’s part of growing up.
In the end, they both graduate and realize that all the drama from their school days is gone. They realize how big the world is and move forward, forging a better world.
CONCLUSION
I really hope that those comics arn’t absolute garbage and the LGBT+ community can get some decent representation. Correct me for anything weird or inaccurate I said. Please don’t obliterate the writers or the artists. Thanks for reading.
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Siobhan Reviews Movies: the 2019 Re-review
we may be a month and a half into 2020, and maybe at the end of this cinematic year I’ll actually do this on new years. But anyway. It’s very obvious when you read a few of the reviews that my rating system is based on how I’m feeling about the movie as I sit through the credits. Because that’s when I write the reviews. But my dad gave me an idea yesterday - to rank all of the movies against each other, to come up with a better rating system. So here goes, I guess.
29: Dora and the Lost City of Gold
I saw this with my friend for my birthday, which was a mistake, but in our defense, there actually wasn’t anything else on, and it’s a tradition. The big problem was that we weren’t the target audience, but then, we couldn’t work out who the target audience actually was. 
Original Score: 4/10 New Score: Also 4/10. (not actually bad enough to beat the lowest score on here, transformers 5, the one with the knights of the round table story line)
28: Alita: Battle Angel
I saw it twice, and I regretted it both times. I regretted it so much the second time that I actually downgraded my rating. It was that bad.And now, I’m going to downgrade the rating again.
First Score: 6/10 (What was I thinking?) Second Score: 5/10 New Score: 4/10
27: Dumbo
I don’t even really know why I went to see Dumbo. I’ve never been a Disney fan. I don’t even think I’ve seen the original Dumbo. It was a cg horror-show, and not in the fun way. Sometimes you should just leave movies as the original 2D animation. 
Original Score: 6/10 New Score: 4/10
26: Maleficent: Mistress of Evil
Again with the disney movies. I actually enjoyed the maleficent movie. it was nice. But the second? it was weird and unnecessary. The only redeeming feature was Michelle Pfieffer.
Original Score: 6/10 New Score: 5/10 (I mean, it was pretty, so it had that going for it)
25: It Chapter 2
I’ve never been that much of a Steven King fan. But some of his movies are decent. It Chapter 2 was decent. But it was weird. I kinda like my horrors on the non-alien-clown-side of weird, thanks.
Original Score: 5.5/10 New Score: 5/10
24: Fast and Furious: Hobbs and Shaw
I mean, they should really stop with the fast and furious films. They really should. It was enjoyable, as long as you suspended your disbelief at EVERY SINGLE PART OF THE MOVIE. They’ve decided to go straight into actual scifi, with no reason why.
Original Score: 5/10 New Score: 5/10
23: Pet Sematary
You know what I said about Steven King movies? Same deal, but at least Pet Sematary was coherent. To an extent. It still had that weird, second story-line that wasn’t resolved. 
Original Score: 7/10 New Score: 5.5/10
22: Avengers Endgame
I gave it a high score on the day, but it wasn’t that great. It was... a big screen spectacle where they didn’t actually put that much effort into making it make sense. which was sad. But anyway, now I’m only going to watch Thor movies. I like Thor movies.
Original Score: 8/10 New Score: 6/10
21: Aladdin
It was really pretty, and really lovely. Was it an outstanding movie? nah. 
Original Score: 8/10 New Score: 6/10
20: How to Train Your Dragon 3
It really bugged me that the light fury was feminised when literally none of the other dragons were. It was like “how do we show that this character is a love interest and not just another character?” But other than that, it was a decent movie. 
Original Score: 7/10 New Score: 6.5/10
19: Rocketman
I think, in my head, I was trying to compare Rocketman to Bohemian Rhapsody the whole movie. I tried not to, but alas, sometimes it’s difficult not to compare similar movies. Anyway I liked it, but I felt weird watching a biopic about someone who helped make it. I can’t really explain it.
Original Score: 6.5/10 New Score: 6.5/10 
18: Godzilla: King of Monsters 
It was a monster movie. It was pretty. There’s not actually much to say besides that. 
Original score: 7/10 New Score: 6.5/10
17: Spider-Man: Far From Home
Look, it was pretty enjoyable, and I really liked Jake Gyllanhal as Mysterio
Original Score: 7.5/10 New Score: 7/10
16: Charlies Angels
The new Charlie’s Angels was fun. it wasn’t necessarily well written, but it had the same appeal as a fast and furious movie. It was action packed, it was cheesy, it was fun. I’m looking forward to more movies like it.
Original Score: 8/10 New Score: 7.5/10
15:  MIB International
It was silly, it was ridiculous, it had aliens. MIB International was everything I wanted.
Original Score: 8/10 New Score: 7.5/10
14:  Hellboy
I know I’m supposed to not be comparing movies to other movies, but I was hard pressed not comparing the new Hellboy to Guillermo Del Toro’s early 2000s movies. Which I love dearly. It was violent and gruesome, and sat about even with the old ones, but for different reasons. 
Original Score: 8/10 New Score: 8/10
13: Black Christmas
I’ll always watch a movie that frames the american college sorority/fraternity system as a cult. Especially if it has aesthetic.
Original Score: 7/10 New Score: 8/10
12: John Wick 3
John Wick 3 was funny. And it was pretty. What more do you need from a hyper-violent action movie?
Original Score: 8/10 New Score: 8/10
11: Yesterday
Yesterday was a really lovely movie. it was a beautiful feelgood movie, but not in the lame way.
Original Score: 8.5/10 New Score: 8.5/10
10: Detective Pikachu
I re-watched detective pikachu today. Man I love that movie. It’s sweet and funny.
Original Score: 8.5/10 New Score: 8.5/10
9: Captain Marvel
Despite how much I’m starting to dislike marvel, I really did like Captain Marvel. Probably because, if you ignored the links they put in to prove that it’s part of a franchise, it could actually stand alone. 
Original Score: 10/10 New Score: 8.5/10
8: The Lego Movie 2
YOu know when movies self reference, or reference other movies, and it’s super annoying? The Lego Movie 2 did those things, but in a not annoying way. It a “this is really stupid but in an enjoyably way” kind of way.
Original Score: 10/10 New Score: 8.5/10
7:  Zombieland 2: Double Tap
So it was a shameless cash in on a very fun movie, but that didn’t make it less enjoyable.
Original Score: 9/10 New Score: 8.5/10
6: Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark
I’ve heard that Scary Stories wasn’t actually super well received, but I really enjoyed it. It had everything in it that I wanted to see, which is really all I need from a movie.
Original Score: 10/10
New Score: 9/10 (Okay, so it does need to go down just a little bit, since it’s number 6 on the list.)
5: Knives Out
In a year of sequels and franchises, Knives out was a refreshingly original movie. A whodunnit where you thought you knew who the killer was for 70% of the movie. With interesting characters who all got what they deserved. It was awesome.
Original Score: 8/10 New Score: 9/10
4: JoJo Rabbit
I don’t watch war movies, as a rule. JoJo Rabbit is an exception. And a brilliant one. They managed to make light of very, very dark subjects,but not in a way that trivialised any of them. Nothing felt trivial in JoJo Rabbit, despite the comedic take. It was beautifully done.
Original Score: 9/10 New Score: 9.5/10
3: Happy Death Day 2 U
The perfect sequel to the perfect groundhog-day-slasher-flick. and I say that with all the love in my heart. I’ve watched Happy Death Day and its sequel so many times. They just makes me so happy. 
Original Score: 9/10 New Score: 9.5/10
2: Us
Us was my number one movie of the year until Ready or Not came along in all its slasher flick glory. It ticked all of the boxes: compelling story, beautiful cinematography, and outstanding acting. It deserves every award, if only they’d give the big awards to genre films, which they don’t, for some reason.
Original Score: 10/10 New Score: 10/10 (even if it’s not my favourite movie of the year, it’s my second favourite still) 
1: Ready or Not
Genuinely the most fun movie I saw this year. The aesthetics were great, the action was amazing, and the story line was coherent. I was laughing with impressed glee the entire movie.
Original Score: 10/10
New Score: 10/10
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Most Overlooked Movies in Oscar History
Well guys, its official, Green Book was awarded the highest honour a single film can be given. Best Picture. If you spent any time on Twitter the day after the 91st Academy Awards you will have noticed that film nerds were not exactly thrilled by the decision, film Twitter immediately erupted into a discussion about all the films that didn’t receive the nomination that may have been more worthy winners than Green Book. Films like Eighth Grade, The Miseducation of Cameron Post and If Beale Street Could Talk appear to have benefited far more in regard to free publicity than any of the actual nominees. Of course, this isn’t the first time that the academy has failed to acknowledge the real best of the year and it certainly won’t be the last. So, in the spirit of being mad at the Academy let’s take a look at some of the worst historical snubs of all time.Well guys, its official, Green Book was awarded the highest honour a single film can be given. Best Picture. If you spent any time on Twitter the day after the 91st Academy Awards you will have noticed that film nerds were not exactly thrilled by the decision, film Twitter immediately erupted into a discussion about all the films that didn’t receive the nomination that may have been more worthy winners than Green Book. Films like Eighth Grade, The Miseducation of Cameron Post and If Beale Street Could Talk appear to have benefited far more in regard to free publicity than any of the actual nominees. Of course, this isn’t the first time that the academy has failed to acknowledge the real best of the year and it certainly won’t be the last. So, in the spirit of being mad at the Academy let’s take a look at some of the worst historical snubs of all time.
The Avengers (2012)
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Actual nominations: Argo, Amour, Beasts of the Southern Wild, Django Unchained, Les Misérables, Life of Pi, Lincoln, Silver Linings Playbook, Zero Dark Thirty.
The Academy has historically looked down on superhero films with no comic book adaptation receiving a Best Picture nod before Black Panther earlier this year. While The Avengers may not have been the most artistic or dramatic film of 2012 it is hard to deny it’s impact. When future generations look back on the films of the 2010s The Avengers will likely stand out as one of the most important releases. With the Marvel Cinematic Universe feeling like a part of everyday life it can be hard to remember just how big a risk this movie was at the time. Think pieces were all over the internet about how the film would ultimately end up as an unwatchable, convoluted mess of ideas that would end Joss Wheadon’s career. How wrong they were.
If the Best Picture award is supposed to honour the greatest and most important achievements in modern cinema then The Avengers absolutely deserved to end up on the ballot, but we don’t live in the universe where The Academy does cool stuff like that.
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind (2004)
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Actual nominations: Million Dollar Baby, The Aviator, Finding Neverland, Ray, Sideways.
How on earth did this happen? It truly amazes me that more members of the academy felt that Finding Neverland deserved more acclaim than Eternal Sunshine. Going of the assumption that the ‘best picture’ should be the film with all its filmmaking elements working perfectly together then Eternal Sunshine should win every year. Charlie Kaufman won the award for original screenplay and Kate Winslet received the only other nomination for lead actress, this film didn’t even receive a nomination in any of the technical categories. The treatment of Michel Gondry’s masterpiece by the Academy should be seen as a permanent black spot on the ceremony’s reputation.
Who Framed Roger Rabbit (1988)
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Actual Nominations: Rain Man, The Accidental Tourist, Dangerous Liaisons, Mississippi Burning, Working Girl
Hear me out on this one. Roger Rabbit is one of my all-time favourite movies and for that, I’ll admit, I’m a little bias. That being said I truly believe that this is one of the finest achievements in cinema history from a purely technical level. The nominees for the 61st Acadamy Awards are solid (for the most part wtf is going with The Accidental Tourist?) but none of these films are as impressive as what Robert Zemeckis and his team were able to achieve by mixing live action film with 2D animation. Roger Rabbit is more than just a gimmick however, this a very entertaining and genuinely compelling detective story at its core. Once again, the term ‘Best Picture’ feels perfectly defined while discussing this film, a film that wasn’t even considered for the award.
Donnie Darko (2001)
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Actual Nominees: A Beautiful Mind, Gosford Park, In the Bedroom, Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring, Moulin Rouge
Excuse my language but Donnie Darko is a fucking great movie. Here is another year where the nominees were pretty solid but come on you can’t tell me that Donnie Darko was too weird and abstract when you nominated Moulin bloody Rouge! Donnie Darko is the sort of film that is still being discussed to this day with so many incredibly well thought out details both in the direction and the screenplay. When you ask a film lover what is so special about the medium it is films like this that they will point to, with an excellent score, great performances, hypnotically simple editing and masterful direction it doesn’t put a foot wrong. Do I really have to spell out what the words ‘Best Picture’ mean again?
WALL.E (2008)
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Actual Nominees: Slumdog Millionaire, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, Frost/Nixon, Milk, The Reader
Let’s talk about animation for a bit. Only three animated films have ever been nominated for top prize (Beauty and the Beast, Up and Toy Story 3) considering the amount for excellent animated film are not those three I had a lot to choose from. With the likes of My Neighbour Totoro, Toy Story, Aladdin, The Little Mermaid, The Lion King, Princess Mononoke and The Nightmare Before Christmas going completely unnoticed the academy has found a way to further segregate the medium of animation from live-action film by introducing the ‘best animated feature’ award at the 2002 ceremony. This addition has led to films like Spirited Away, Finding Nemo, The Incredibles, Ratatouille, Frozen, Inside Out and most recently Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse receiving an award without having to let them compete with live action films. There are no academy rules that state animation cannot be considered for Best Picture it just doesn’t happen. I have singled out WALL.E because I think it showcases exactly what modern animation has achieved. WALL.E is a largely silent film with gorgeous visuals and a strong environmental message that is still accessible to general audiences, including children. Surly one of Pixar’s finest achievements deserves to be held in just as high regard as David Fancher’s 8th best film.
 Ps. You will notice a distinct lack of The Dark Knight in the 2008 nominations as well.
Psycho (1960)
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Actual Nominees: The Apartment, The Alamo, Elmer Gantry, Sons and Lovers, The Sundowners
Another genre historically left out of the running is horror. Only 6 horror films have ever been up for the award (The Exorcist, Jaws, The Silence of the lambs, The Sixth Sense, Black Swan and Get Out). Horror is a genre that is often looked down upon in the film community for being ‘low-brow’ and not as artistic, a similar struggled as the one faced by the superhero genre. With important releases such as: Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Suspiria, Halloween, Alien, The Shining, Let he Right One In, Night of the Living Dead and perhaps most surprising, Psycho going unnoticed by the academy it is clear to see that there is a bias against the genre somewhere in Hollywood. Psycho is also emblematic of another problem with historic best picture nominations. What on earth is the academy’s issue with Alfred Hitchcock? Psycho is not the only of Hitchcock’s classic films not to receive the nomination, in fact North by Northwest, Vertigo, Rear Window and Dial M for Murder were all snubbed.
On a related note despite being nominated 5 times Hitchcock never received the Oscar for best director putting him in the prestigious company of: David Lynch, Terry Gilliam, Ridley Scott, Wes Anderson Quentin Tarantino, David Fincher, Edgar Wright, Spike Lee, Charlie Chaplin, Orson Wells and Stanley Kubrick. So, I guess you could say that it isn’t just the Best Picture category that doesn’t make sense.
 These were 6 examples I felt I could make a point out of, it is important to remember that many more examples are out there of revolutionary masterworks that went unrecognised come awards season. People don’t take into consideration what happens behind the scenes at the Oscars. The ceremony needs good ratings, The Academy needs to honour films with progressive messages that are easily digestible, and everyone has an agenda and wants to see their friends win. The Oscars are a lot of fun, it gives people like as a chance to talk about the films we loved that year hopefully see our favourites given some well-deserved recognition but let’s not take it more seriously than we should. Next year when the Academy inevitably choses to honour mediocrity remind yourself that The Third Man wasn’t nominated in 1950 or you could remind yourself that Singin’ in the Rain wasn’t nominated in 1953, alternatively mention that 2001: A Space Odyssey was snubbed in 1969, The Matrix in 2000, Back to the Future in 1986, Pan’s Labyrinth in 2007, Cool Hand Luke in 1968. Or if you want your could run into the street and shout about how, Duck Soup, Modern Times, His Girl Friday, Night of the Living Dead, The Shining, The Good, The Bad and The Ugly, Oldboy, Reservoir Dogs and The Big Lebowski all weren’t nominated for god dammed thing.
Nathan Needs A Username’s Must See Movies: https://letterboxd.com/nathan_r_l/list/nathan-needs-a-usernames-must-see-movies/
Nathan Needs A Username’s Avoid At All Cost Movies: https://letterboxd.com/nathan_r_l/list/nathan-needs-a-usernames-avoid-at-all-cost/
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popculturebuffet · 5 years
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Analysis of X: Uncanny X-Men #159 “Night Screams!”
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Happy Halloween! For our Halloween special, I take my first dive into Claremont’s classic X-Men Run proper, as Claremont’s future New Mutants partner Bill Sienkiewicz drops by just in time for the X-Men to battle Dracula for the soul of Storm! Get your stakes ready and join me after the cut.
Welcome everyone to my special Halloween Edition of Analysis of X. I love this holliday: Scary movies, adorable children in costume, more sugar than I probably need… it’s the best. And it’s on this sacred day I’ve decided to take a second look at one of my faviorite X-Men stories and see if it still holds up to me the second time around. I first heard about this story in the back of Wizard Magzine in this old beatup issue I got from my brother,  and was blown away by the descrption of an event we’ll get to towards the end. When I finally read the issue years later thanks to an issue of Classic X-Men, it exceded my expectations, and hence here I am to see if it still holds up. And since the few bits of exposition needed can just be done as we go, let’s sink our teeth into “Night Screams”
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We open on the Uncanny, the powerful, the misunderstood, the brave X-Men!... barging into someone’s apartment and being confused by the occupant. Naturally both parties are confused: The young lady because it’s her damn apartment and suddenly a blue elf, a smelly hairy Canadian, a metallic Russian, an African goddess and a masked teenager come rushing into her place. The X-Men are confused because this apartment belongs to their friend Misty Knight. Those of you who watched Netflix’s excellent Luke Cage series probably remember her from that. In the comics she’s not far off from where she ended up by the end of the Netflix/MCU partnership: a private eye who used to be a cop and has a robot arm, in the comics provided by Tony Stark because back in the 70’s and 80’s tony would make some sorta gadget for anyone who pulled a dump truck of money up to his house. As I mentioned in Excalibur, Chris Claremont never really forgot any character he ever had anything to do with, and since she was a major supporting character during his run on iron fist along with her partner in asskicking Colieen Wing, who you may remember as the best part of Iron Fist’s own Netflix series, he had the two pop up in his X-Men run during a time when they thought the professor and jean were dead, because no one bothered to pick up a fucking phone. As such Misty had apparently offered her place to the X-Men any time they were in the city proper… but herself didn’t pick up the damn phone and tell her in the past few months she got a roommate, so said roommate is understandably pissed off to find a bunch of strangers in her place.
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As the above should make obvious, the young lady is Harmony Young, famous model and misty’s new roommate. At this time Mary Jo Duffy had taken over Luke Cage, at the time Power Man,’s book and, in an attempt to keep the book from being canceled, brought Iron Fist in as a second protagonist and made the book into a buddy picture with the two’s contrasting personalites and backgrounds playing off each other. Having read this run, it’s fantastic and well worth a read and is the backbone of later runs of Luke and Danny while creating one of the best friendships in all of Marvel.  As for how the hell this relates to this story, Harmony is a supporting character from that run and at the time, Luke’s Girlfriend and thus moved in with Misty when Misty needed a roommate.
With the confusion cleared up the X-Men try to smooth things over, minus Logan who, now knowing he dosen’t have a fight on his hands is going to get drunk because logan frankly has three states: boning, drinking and killin, and Kurt’s already swooping in there, and while you’d think hitting on Luke Cage’s girlfriend would be dumb, Luke is not above a three way. I mean why do you think danny sleeps at his and jess’s place every other Sunday? Storm being the leader she is offers to leave, but Harmony, seeing three handsome young men and likely having an open relationship with Luke, decides what the hell and lets the X-Men stay. Kitty scoffs at her and.. oh god I’m going to have to talk about the Colossus and Kitty thing aren’t I? Fuck me…. Yeah for those of you who weren’t aware, Kitty had a crush on Colossus.. a grown man at the very least 6 years older than her. They eventually DID enter a relationsip, that THANK CHRIST, wasn’t sexual till Jim Shooter, in one of the few times he actually made sense as Marvel’s Editor in Chief outright told Chris to cut it out and broke the couple up himself by having Pitor fall for someone else. And while that whole romance was forced and rushed, it both ended an annoying subplot and gave us a DAMN good issue of Uncanny I’ll get to some day. We soon find out WHY the X-Men are in town in the first place:
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I do like the story progression so far: it feels organic and the opening of the X-Men barging in on an apartment is a nice hook and the following pages quickly explain the situation without feeling too clunky about it. But yeah Kitty’s Parents want to see her and while as Ororo notes she dosen’t have anything to wear, Harmony being a true friend to this person she just met offers up her vast wardrobe which Kitty herself quickly gets herself a piece of. The two get dressed and head off to meet the Prydes. We then get a short scene of Cyclops, whose on vacation visitng his brother Alex alongside his space pirate dad. As you can tell i’m not really going that much into it as it’s only one page of the isssue and has nothing to do with the rest of the plot other than informing us Professor Xavier’s in a coma, which tells me why he wasn’t with the rest of the team.  Back in NYC, Kurt is still flirting with Harmony when the team gets a call from Kitty... who wonders if Ororo got home okay. Kurt’s instantly put on alert because she’d told kitty she was heading straight back.. hours ago. And as we see bellow, she’s been attacked with two marks left on her neck... which can only mean one thing.. NEIL BREEN HAS KILLED AGAIN.. or you know vampires. 
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Storm is rushed to the hospital and Logan and PItor soon get the call thanks to Storm’s wallet to come get her. While the doctor wants to keep her overnight Storm is.. oddly calm, finding the night realixing and getting the feeling something’s watching her, but shaking it off. The fact she’s not CONCERNED about that or seems chipper after having her throat torn open just screams red flag don’t’ it? Storm returns home to rest , shooing the rest of the X-Men away and well. if you were wondering when the hell this turned into a vampire story besides the whole neck bites thing... 
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The scene is haunting and well done and Bill, since his last name is hard to spell and I’ve mangled enough names as is on this blog, does a fine job with it, portraying the horror of it as well as how entrhaled Ororo is well. IT’s this sort of moody atmospheric stuff that would serve him well when he became artist on New Mutants and thare’s damn good reason his run is where the book really starts to pick up steam. Kitty returns home.. and is greeted with the news Storm has turned ill. When kitty tries visting storm is afraid of the sunlight, has a mysterious scarf from an admierer with a large D on it, and flinches when Kitty’s star of david brushes up against her. Kitty, sensing the obvious heads off to do some errands. Later that night Ororo lets her her “lover” and the one behind all this...
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Yup. I wasn’t lying or exaggerating in the teaser: The one behind all this is DRACULA. That Dracula, not some alien or some other vampire. The prince of Darkness himself has designs on Ororo. And if your wondering if this is just some one issue weirdness… NOPE. Around this time, Dracula had his own ongoing started in the 70’s, Tomb of Dracula and what I’ve read is excellent. As a result Dracula was a part of the Marvel Universe, had his own backstory and enimies, and fought the likes of Dr. Strange and Spider-Man and earlier this year was the center of a major plot in Jason Aaron’s Avengers run. But before he can turn her, help arrives..
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IT’s kitty who got a nifty Van Helsing getup and a cross.. but in an intresting twist on the mythos the cross does nothing. But not for the by this point cliché reason of “we’re just not using that old chesnut”, no in the Marvel Universe one needs genuine faith for the religious symbols weakness to work… and as the star of david showed earlier, Kitty is Jewish .. but when Dracula tries to choke a bitch, it’s said star of David that saves her. Tragically, Storm is too brainwashed to run and leaves with Dracula, begging Kitty to forget her and leaving the poor child in tears as her surrogate older sister leaves with a monster, possibly forever and there’s nothing she can do to stop it. On a side note though nice entrance line. While it’s no “Begone monster you do not belong in this world!” it’s still pretty sweet. 
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The rest of the team burst in and Kitty explains what’s going on: that while she didn’t know it was DRACULA till now, she was supscious but rightly suspected the others wouldn’t belive her and Logan dosen’t, trying to write off the scarf as Harmony or Misty’s.. but Kurt shoots it down, stating that Kitty is no child and her word means as much as Logan’s own, with his own time in Bavaria telling him to not take vampires lightly.. ESPECIALLY Dracula. Even if Logan still isn’t buying it, Kitty does point out that wether she’s right or not, Ororo is too injured to leave out in the wild, let alone with some strange man who may or may not be Dracula. Given this is a superhero comic, a fight naturally breaks out, with Dracula summoning his wolves, where’d he purchase those, to fight while Kurt tries fighting the big man himself.. and quickly gets his fuzzy blue ass handed to him. Colossus and WOlverine take the wolves out and prepare for the big man himself. 
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As you can see Dracula is handing them their asses.. which is no surprise: not only are the X-Men two members short, and even if they weren’t Dracula would still be able to take them. It also helps ease him into this shared universe: the reason why he hasn’t been beaten for good with so many heroes out there is simple:  besides having the cover of being so famous that most wouldn’t belive he’s real, he’s also really damn powerful and only one vampire hunter after him has any sort of powers, that being Blade who was introduced in Tomb of Dracula. And while he’s a vampire, he dosen’t have Drac’s broken number of extra powers.
With it now being clear given he fuck slammed Colossus that Dracula is out of their league Kurt suggests a straight up fight won’t work and they need plan B.. and with that we get the best scene in the issue, the one that made me want to read it in the first place. 
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Just as a recap, in a brilliant callback to a few pages ago, Wolverine tries, cleverly, to use his claws as a cross.. but as Dracula mocks him, it won’t work. Like Parappa the Rapper says you gotta belivie.. and unfortunately for Dracula, Kurt does in what is, to my suprise, the first time his religion comes up but it works well and adds a sizeable amount to his character. Sadly as fucking epic as this is, it only holds him off for a second and he soon sendds lightning after him because.. apparently he can do that now? I dunno.  While this goes on Kitty runs into the castle which Dracula has morphed into his own kinda castle, and while Kitty dosen’t find dracula she does find an almost turned storm and readies a stake, though Ororo points out it won’t do much good.. and we get another powerful scene as Kitty decides she’s right. 
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While that goes on, the rest of the team presses on but have no more luck and soon Dracula has them beat and Storm arrives seemingly having slain kitty.. only to shed her Dracula outfit for her uniform and start kicking Dracula’s ass, kicking off an awesome fight between the two.
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She ends up slamming him into a party where Drac, being a sore looser, tries to force her to submit.. but she stays her ground and he gets desperat holding a hostage to try and get her to submit
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But as seen she will not and refuses to.. and Dracula admits defeat, realizing he was genuinely attracted to her and he’d have to snuff out what made her worthy of being his queen to do so. Granted he’s still a creepy mind rapist, but it’s still a nice character touch. He books it out of there, and being good at evading people as his solo would show, tells Ororo following would be a fools errand and givne how beaten down her team is , even with her back to give them the edge, he’s right. So for now he escapes, but the X-Men have one the night and Ororo is free and back to being just a mutant again and tearfully reunited with kitty at misty’s place.
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With that touching scene done, our heroes runite with Harmony, with Misty and Coleen now present and celebrate their narrow victory. There’s also a quick stinger with Moira MacTaggert telling the X-Men xavier’s condition has gotten worse, but for the most part, it’s a happy ending as our heroes, however narrowly have won the day and I thankfully got this done before Halloween ended.
Final Thoughts: This issue is every bit as good the second time around, if not more so now I know who Harmony is and have read some of Dracula’s own title, though it’s not a necessity as none of the stuff from Tomb is important here, and Harmony is introduced well enough. This issue is a masterpiece, having atompsheric moody horror, the drawings well done and there’s so much I didn’t show that’s just awesome and Bill would only get better from here. The character work is also great as most of the X-Men get moments to shine. While wolverine is mostly there for his usaul schtick as is Colosus, how easily dracula manhandles them shows just how strong he is without feeling forced. But the real stars are Kurt, who gets one of his finest moments here and even after that fails still presses on anyway, Storm whose transformation is truly horrifying and whose ultimate victory is made all the sweeter and Kitty, whose at her best with: her youthful naivity matching well with her refusal to give up as she stares down both Dracula and her big sister in equal amounts. The issue is a must read for what’s left of this Halloween and every one after it and a great little done in one. Even with the btis of other storylines, it’s still easy to read and understand on it’s own and is one of the best one and done issues i’ve ever read and still holds it’s position in my eyes as one of the best X-Men stories period, taking what should be a rediculous premise and owning the hell out of it. A must read if i’ve ever read one. 
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traincat · 5 years
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What do you think of Johnny and Namorita?
Johnny and Namorita confuse me. Not in terms of the actual pairing of the characters – I think if any work had been done with their relationship, it could’ve been cute, and I like their initial scenes together. And obviously there was a lot to explore there potentially, what with Sue and Namor’s own history, and the Fantastic Four’s long relationship with Namor. So you’d think the comics could have built an interesting romance or dynamic out of that! 
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I admittedly haven’t read that much with Namorita, so I don’t know what is or isn’t out of character for her, but it doesn’t really matter, because once the relationship gets rolling she’s barely present anyway, which is, you know, odd, considering they’re supposed to be dating. They spend so little time together that it’s actually remarked upon in Fantastic Four v3 #55:
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“I had this funny idea a guy was supposed to spend time with his girlfriend.”
Ugh, so, this in and of itself is not actually uncommon for Johnny in his relationships, which is part of what makes his reputation as a playboy or womanizer particularly mystifying. Post-Crystal, all of Johnny’s relationships get Weird in one way or another. There’s his relationship with Frankie Raye, which 1) is fairly shortlived in terms of the time they actually spent together, and again, we don’t see much of that time, 2) implies that Frankie was only attracted to Johnny because her own latent fire powers were reacting to his, and 3) takes place in a plot that hinges on Frankie and Johnny never having been naked together. Literally that is important to the plot leading up to Frankie discovering her powers. Oh, and then she leaves him for Galactus. Then Johnny’s next serious relationship is with Alicia Masters, which has uhhh the chemistry of a beige wall. Anyway, then they get married. Then Alicia turned out not to be Alicia at all, but a Skrull named Lyja, which flips the entire marriage and relationship on its head. And that is all of Johnny’s serious romantic relationships (discounting his high school girlfriend and several flirtations that never go anywhere) up until Namorita. So that’s already looking a bit dicey on his end; it is essentially his first relationship after his “marriage” and what I would label his fourth “real” adult relationship.
Though Johnny and Namorita knew each other beforehand, things take a flirtatious turn in New Warriors v2 #3:
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It’s some pretty chaste flirting. Namorita and Johnny bond over the price of celebrity at dinner, then sneak out and kiss on the roof. It’s a cute scene overall. The problem is that’s… kind of the end of it. I mean, they’re apparently, after this point, in a relationship, it’s just that we see very little of it. 
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In New Warriors v2 #9, Namorita reacts to the news that the Fantastic Four have joined with Doctor Doom (who is really Reed trapped in Doom’s armor) with anger. We never see her and Johnny talk about this, which is funny, because we certainly do see Johnny talk about it with someone in the pages of Fantastic Four:
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(Fantastic Four v3 #27) With most other characters, a scene like this would happen with their love interest, but when Claremont picked who he wanted Johnny to discuss things he went with… Spider-Man. Because again: Johnny doesn’t spend time with his girlfriend. 
He and Namorita don’t break up after this – they’re vaguely together for a while longer. She’s spotted here with Johnny while an alternate Frankie Raye makes a “fire and water” comment:
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Fantastic Four v3 #46 – as you can see, some time has passed, enough that you’d expect me to be able to pull up some scenes that are more romantic. Nope. I think maybe they might have kissed a few times in here but if they did it wasn’t interesting or pretty enough for me to have saved to my refs, and I save like, everything Johnny-related. 
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Namorita did attend some promotional event for Johnny’s movie, the Rawhide Kid, with him in Fantastic Four #50 (which is a nuff said – no dialogue). This, combined with the shared celebrity setup of the beginning of their relationship and the fact that even Ben remarks that Johnny doesn’t really spend time with her, leads me to sort Johnny&Namorita into a Johnny Relationship Category I called the Celebrity Relationships. This is a subset of Johnny’s relationships where he appears to be invested in them not because he’s genuinely romantically interested in the other person, but because both of them are public figures who receive boosts in the media for being seen with one another. Namorita is actually the first incident of these – and I think it’s very interesting that this is a trend that only starts happening after the end of his “marriage” and relationships with Lyja. (Warning for heavy discussion of sexual assault in that second link.) The other two Celebrity Relationships are with Kourtney, a supermodel he dates on and off during Marvel Knights who seems generally bored with him and breaks up with him after the Fantastic Four lose their fortune (although they do later get back together):
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(Marvel Knights 4 #2)
And Darla Deering, a pop sensation, who Johnny even explicitly admitted he was dating because he was attracted to her lifestyle, not to her:
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(FF #16)
Johnny’s a celebrity, and he loves being a celebrity, but he is also bad at being a celebrity and he has massive self-esteem and self-image issues. Pre-Lyja, Johnny’s obsessed with falling in love and getting married. Post-Lyja, Johnny starts entering these relationships that seem to be about staying in the public eye as much as being in the relationship, and Namorita seems to be the first of these. I do think he genuinely liked her; I just don’t know if I think he was attracted to her. (The first thing he does in the scene where they flirt for the paparazzi is compliment her new, more covered costume up.) We don’t know when they break up, exactly – it’s not on the page (what is) – but in Human Torch (2003) #11, which describes their relationship as “intense, passionate, and mercurial” (to which I ask: WHERE) Johnny says Namorita left him, while Namorita blames Hollywood and also states that she didn’t want to be swallowed up by the Fantastic Four:
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Annnd then they part ways again after reconciling a little bit. It’s kind of a weird issue because we never actually see any of these “passionate, mercurial” fights, really. They’re just sometimes on the page together and then they’re not, and this comes in with an explanation that doesn’t really fit with what’s on the page. Which, to be fair, is not unique to Namorita when it comes to Johnny’s romantic relationships. I feel like writers try to make relationships work for him and then when the characters aren’t clicking they just sort of… fall by the wayside. And I think that’s what happened with Johnny and Namorita.
So ultimately my opinion is that I would have really liked to see more between them. The public eye aspect, the Namor aspect, the long history between their families, the obvious fire and water metaphors – I think there were places to go here, but they just didn’t happen. 
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chopperpirate · 5 years
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MCU Retrospective
I've decided to, in honor of Avengers Endgame, write about my thoughts on the MCU as a whole. Well, obviously I love it, but am cautiously optimistic about its future. It's easily one of my favorite film franchises, and though I don't think it ever really reaches the highs of The Dark Knight, it's better than any other Superhero related thing in the realm of Live-Action film, with the only things like Logan and The Dark Knight surpassing it in my heart. I still think DC animated films can sometimes be better, but it shouldn't be a competition.
I've been seeing people participating in this "One Marvelous Scene" thing lately, so I'll do that as well after ranking every MCU film I've seen from best to worst. I won't bore you with too much writing, though because I know I'll get flack, I'll try to justify my top and bottom 5 with some comments. With that said, here's Chopperpirate Mun's MCU film ranking!
Guardians of the Galaxy  Vol. 2 - Anyone who knows me knows how much I love things that value the connections between ragtag "nakama" who aren't related by blood, but were brought together by circumstance and are now the closest thing each member has to family. Not to mention that this film has emotional payoffs for Nebula and Gamora's heartfelt rivalry, Rocket's tsundere hangups, and Peter's heritage that I'd say are all easily the most emotional resonant things out of the MCU. The comedy in the film is probably only rivaled by Thor: Ragnarok. My two personal favorite jokes being the Mary Poppins bit, and Drax shouting "MANTIS! LOOK OUT!" mere seconds after Mantis was already hit and knocked unconscious.
The highlight for comedy is easily Drax, but his speech to Mantis about why her perceived ugliness is a good thing because if someone loves you despite your ugliness, they love you for who you are, really might be one of my favorite moments in the film. Same with Yondu's speech to Rocket about how they're the same. Believe it or not, I cried more during Yondu's death than I did for Tony Stark's in Endgame. I can't really tell you why. Something about his last line just reminded me of Whitebeard from One Piece.
Yondu's death scene aside, my favorite scene in the film is easily when he, Groot, and Rocket are slaughtering the traitor Ravengers to the tune of "Come a Little Bit Closer."
On that note, the villains of this film are some of the best. They aren't bland, generic evil points of contention for the film to have a climax! Taser Face is hilarious, The Sovereign are hilariously arrogant and I find the fact that they only engage in combat through arcade simulations to be perfect for their personalities, and Ego might be the best Marvel Villain besides Loki up until that point in the MCU. The reveal that he killed Meredith was shocking, and might very well be the best "Wham Line" in the MCU to this date. His death scene showed a lot of depth to Peter, and like a good villain, he had a lot of parallels and contrasts to the protagonist instead of just having a clone of their abilities for the sake of a final boss fight.
The Winter Soldier - Captain America at his finest. Bucky was awesome, Black Widow was finally given a lot of vulnerabilities and depth as she bonded with Steve, Falcon was alright, HYDRA as a collective is an amazing source of paranoia fuel, and this movie might have the best action out of any MCU film, or at least my personal favorite brand of action. Instead of CG magic and shit, we get to see visceral knife fights, punches, kicks, and close-quarters martial arts. It's surprisingly brutal for a PG-13 film. I recall one point where Bucky kicks a SHIELD agent into a helicopter propeller.
As for my favorite scene in this film, I'd have to say it's the Elevator sequence. The build up was perfectly suspenseful, and the payoff of the line "Before we get started, does anyone want to get off?" felt badass and perfect for the character of Captain America, who, instead of being snide or arrogant, shows that he's ready to fight, while willing to let his enemies back out if they so choose.
This film might also be Nick Fury's finest. I was very disappointed that Captain Marvel didn't enhance the character more than this film did, but oh well. The way Fury communicated words with Steve while showing him what he really meant through writing was clever while also perfectly exemplifying his character. Fury is very secretive, never showing vulnerability or letting himself get attached to others, yet we can tell from his actions and concerns that he is a good person, even if he isn't a nice person. The way he says one meaningless thing while displaying another more pressing thought really shows that the Russos understood the character.
Infinity War - The Empire Strikes Back of the MCU. Thanos is an amazing villain protagonist, and arguably the only character with a full arc in this film, Gamora is probably at her most interesting here, and a lot of the interactions between characters who never got to interact before this film are some of my favorites. I'm especially fond of the chemistry between Doctor Strange and Tony Stark.
Despite how dark and serious this film is, it understands how to keep up dramatic tension while never losing its sense of humor. The same film with Vision dying willingly and pointlessly at the hands of his lover is the film with lines like "Why is Gamora" and "I am Steve Rogers." It's probably the most perfect film in the MCU in terms of story structure and emotional stakes. It's just lower than the ot hers because it lacks the personal love from me that the above films had.
Avengers: Endgame - Now that I've had time to stew on it, this film isn't as good as Infinity War, but it's still great. To clarify, Infinity War was a better structured film and a more entertaining one for the most part. I'd say the first two acts of Endgame were somewhat weak by comparison, but the final 1/3 was so perfect that it almost tempted me to rank it above Infinity War, even if Captain Marvel's presence ruins a lot of things.
I want to remain positive for the most part here, so I won't talk about too many of my gripes, but because I know I'll get asked why I think Captain Marvel ruins the stakes, let me explain. In the MCU, Captain Marvel can canonically move at Lightspeed, and probably faster too. So... when she got the Infinity Gauntlet in the final act's little "Hot Potato" portion, why didn't she just fly to another galaxy and hide the gauntlet away with some trusted civilization, come back to help defeat Thanos' army, then bring the gauntlet back to return the stones to their timelines? Remember, because of this plot hole of MCU Carol Danvers being so overpowered and fast, yet not doing anything to help, Tony Stark is dead. � We know the meta reason is because RDJ and most of the Phase 1 actors are done, but you guys can now totally blame Captain Marvel for it In-Universe.
Positives though! This film made me genuinely love Nebula. She fits so well with The Avengers (arguably better than with the GotG), and the small details of her pity and attachment to Thanos during his early death adds a lot of pathos to her character. Thor's "Big Lebowski" phase was hilarious, Tony and Thor getting closure with their dad/mom respectively was sweet, and the final battle was one of the greatest spectacles to behold. I don't know if it's controversial or not, but I personally loved that Captain America got his happy ending (even if it creates a huge plot hole with this movie's time travel rules). It just lacked the oomph of Infinity War.
Thor Ragnarok - This film saved Thor, made him entertaining and interesting, and gave us yet another great villain in the form of The Grandmaster! It has a similar issue, villain-wise, in my opinion, to Black Panther, in that the secondary villain is far more entertaining than the main villain. Great comedy, Loki's redemption is emotionally fulfilling, and Korg is my MCU waifu. My only issue is that Hela is kind of boring, and the stuff on Sakaar is far more engaging than the "important" plot.
Guardians of the Galaxy The Avengers Spider-Man: Homecoming Iron Man Doctor Strange Captain America: Civil War Iron Man 3 Ant-Man Ant-Man and the Wasp Captain America: The First Avenger Iron Man 2 Black Panther - Very overrated. T'Challa is far less interesting here than he was in Civil War, Wakanda is far better in Infinity War... Really, it's not a "bad" movie. It's just not that special. It's more comparable to the Phase 1 films between Iron Man and Avengers than it is to, say, Wolverine Origins. Glad I saw it. Wouldn't see it again. Didn't care of Killmonger either. Sue me.
Avengers: Age of Ultron - This gets... better on rewatch, but it still sucks. It's a garbage standalone movie, but if you look at it as an in-between film that's setting up things for the Thanos arc, it's actually not so bad. Could've used more scenes like the "Trying to lift Mjolnir," or "chilling at Hawkeye's house" scenes. Just The Avengers hanging out and interacting in low-stakes environments. Instead we get empty, loud, almost Michael Bay-esque action scenes.
Thor: The Dark World - On rewatch, it was surprisingly more entertaining than Thor 1 in a lot of ways. Mostly involving Loki. The human characters, especially Jane and her friend, are horribly boring, and I think we should be thankful that Natalie Portman left the MCU out of frustration for her character being an empty love-interest! She made the right call. Thor isn't really interesting yet, but at least the death of his mother gives him and Loki some legitimate character arcs.
Thor - Eh... it's just kinda bland. Not much to comment on. Loki isn't really fun yet, the human characters are boring, and Thor is probably the least interesting Phase One Avenger aside from Edward Norton's Bruce Banner. It has its moments, but on my most recent MCU rewatch, we were most bored with this one.
Captain Marvel - The most insulting installment of the MCU. Captain Marvel insults people for having those evil Y chromosomes. It's the story of a strong, brave, powerful, beautiful, flawless, overpowered woman who just wants to... umm... be an Air Force Pilot, I guess. She's apparently never met a supportive male in her whole 30+ years of living, because all of her memories are of cartoonish archetypes of men with 1940s values telling her that she can't become a pilot. After all "You know why it's called the cockpit, right?" Ugh...
Not only is the feminist message forced, but it's one of those negative feminist messages that I hate so much. Instead of preaching equality between the two genders, women being just as good as men, it preaches that women are amazing, brave, beautiful, powerful creatures and men are pathetic morons who underestimate women at all times. There's even a scene where her father is yelling at her for crashing a Go-Kart in pure anger and disdain instead of, I dunno... calling a doctor and worrying about his injured child? This movie is... ugh...
Carol herself is either boring and unremarkable or irritatingly condescending depending on the scene's writer. If I recall there were like... 4 or 5 different writers and it really shows. But anyway, she's annoying. She constantly "Womansplains" things to Nick Fury, and her tone is just so smug that it makes me want to slap her. Listen to the way she says "I'm here to stop the shapeshifters that are infiltrating your planet. You don't have any idea what's going on, do you?" It's so demeaning to have Nick Fury, the coolest character whose presence is so demanding and badass that even god-tiers like Thor and a war veteran like Cap shut up and listen when he speaks, be talked to by an unproven character just so Kevin Feige can get some feminist brownie points.
This carries into Endgame where she basically calls Rocket "furrball" and retorts his complaint by harshly explaining why she's not around. In response to this, Rocket, who is characterized in the first film by getting so angry at being called names for his oddities that he almost attempted to murder Drax for it in the bar, simply nods, lowers his head, and says "that's a good point" in a defeated tone. WOW! YOU GO GIRL! CAPTAIN MARVE IS SO TOUGH THAT SHE CAN TALK DOWN TO NICK FURY AND ROCKET AND THEY KNOW BETTER THAN TO COMPLAIN! WOOOOW!
Speaking of feminism, the movie skims over the whole "Air Force discrimination" subplot within under a minute, so we can't really connect to that. As such, one would expect the fact that she's "the most powerful hero in the MCU" to be the big feminist selling point, but she didn't work for that power at all. She got it through sheer coincidence by standing too close to the Tesseract powered engine before it exploded. As such, I suppose the moral is, "Girls! If you wanna be a strong, brave hero, go stand next to an exploding engine!" If so, I caution all viewers to not do that.
Nick Fury is mostly okay in this movie, but he feels underutilized. The retcon of his eye being scratched out by Goose is embarrassing and infuriating. It makes the line from Winter Soldier "Last time I trusted someone, I lost an eye," meaningless and if you were to count this movie as non-canon because of it, I'd be right there with you. He just keeps getting demeaned and treated as a joke, and strangely, the eye retcon isn't even the worst part. I groaned even harder when Carol's friend's daughter says she might build a space ship some day, Fury doesn't know. And Carol replies by saying "You're right, he doesn't know." Pushing the feminist message by knocking Fury down a peg instead of by preaching equality. :\ It wasn't like he said anything misogynistic throughout this film, so I have no idea why he's often the film's punching bag.
Oh, and just a side-note. You wanna know something hilarious? That friend's daughter shows Carol some photos of them together from six years ago. Literally the same actress. Literally the same age in the photo. This child hasn't aged a day in 6 years, so I welcome you to reply with some crack theories so that we can call the writers geniuses instead of incompetence? Is the kid a watcher? A time lord?
Incredible Hulk - Boring, boring, boring. Edward Norton was always a terrible Bruce Banner, the plot is as generic a hulk story as you can imagine, and the character of "Bruce Banner" is almost nonexistent aside from turning into The Hulk when stressed. This Bruce Banner is a handsome, tall, athletic martial artist. If I had to praise it anywhere, the fight between Hulk and Abomination toward the end is actually pretty decent, but aside from that, this film is an embarrassment. It's very telling that the MCU and all its executives swept this one under the rug. It's difficult to find in your Best Buy's "Marvel Studios" section.
There. Proceed to insult my opinions. :D
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davidmann95 · 6 years
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This weeks comics?
So much to cover, and just so we’re all clear upfront, SPOILERS ahead.
Sideways Annual #1: I’m not sure I’ll ever be able to forgive the cover for simply reading “All-out Action, guest-starring Superman” rather than the declaration of “The Champion of the Oppressed is BACK–JUST WHEN THE WORLD NEEDS HIM MOST!” it demanded, but otherwise what a delightful comic. It’s a mess in so many ways given Morrison’s working with what DiDio laid down for him (which he seems to demonstrate hilarious contempt for when he almost literally drops a bridge on the no-hoper who’d been set up as the arc villain before he can do anything) and jumping on mid-stream to boot, but it’s basically just an extended excuse for him to put dialogue in Superman and the Seven Soldiers’ mouths again and remind everyone how rad his takes on them are, and thereby shame us for abandoning the former. Plus give us a taste of what his voice for Spider-Man would be, which it turns out is a perfectly fine one in spite of his past professed skepticism that he could pull it off. And above all to assure us with a smile and the proper send-off (a particularly satisfying one for me personally given my arachnophobia) we never got before that even if we never see our pal cop-punching, bank-busting, casual Fridays Superman again, he’ll be out there, along with all the other cast-off good Superman ideas, helping out wherever he can.
Also, who else caught the nudge and wink about the Tailor, and how that tells devoted Seven Soldiers fans just how much of role Morrison really played in saving his take on Superman?
Batman #60: Batman is…Batman is weird lately. I honestly don’t have anything else to say about this issue, except that the bit with Alfred cleaning was obviously killer.
The Unexpected #6: So Ronan Cliquet is bad, right? Like, we can all agree that dude is just bringing nothing to the table? I’ve never seen pages so plain look so simultaneously cramped and barren. This book has been such a damn disappointment: clearly promises were made about how much space Orlando would have to work on this that have been entirely broken, he’s cutting past what was clearly intended to be dozens of issues of buildup and fleshing-out of the concept to the grand finale, and he’s already obviously and understandably checked out. This should have been one of those “hey, you never heard of _____, but it was quietly one of DC’s best books for awhile there!” titles you learn about 20 years after the fact, but it was stillborn and unable to explore even the slightest sliver of its potential. It’s almost reached a point where it can make me think its coming conclusion is a mercy killing, but then, said conclusion is the problem.
Justice League #11: The debut of the Super-eyepatch! Otherwise, while it’s definitely not my favorite issue thus far of Snyder’s Justice League, it might be the one that feels the most well-realized in terms of getting his vision on the page thanks to Francis Manapul. I desperately hope he sticks on the book past Drowned Earth, because as much as I absolutely love what Jorge Jimenez and Jim Cheung are doing, his vision feels the most in line with the, as Snyder put it, ‘magisterial’ tone this title is going for a lot of the time.
The Green Lantern #1: Not my favorite Morrison title of the week in spite of its lack of clutter and outside influence, to the point where I’d honestly say it initially left me pretty cold, but much as with Morrison’s last major #1 in Action Comics, a reread did wonders for me once I knew what sort of tone I’d be grappling with. I do think it was oddly structured in a way that didn’t benefit it, leading with the mundane-flavored-with-cosmic with the alien beat cops rather than Hal’s more grounded perspective leading into the awe-inspiring, but given it sets up an immediate contrast with his ‘civilian life’, I’d call it a calculated risk that didn’t quite pay off. Hal himself is interestingly realized, this blunt, bored dude who only really comes alive when he’s on the clock, who’s as hyper-competent at his job as you’d think the Greatest Green Lantern Of Them All would be but almost seems to be sleepwalking through his days. It’s when we reach Oa with the mission statement for the Corps that the book really comes together, meshing up the beautiful design sense, an evocation of some of Morrison’s past recurring themes and elements, and raw high concept into the most powerful evocation of the basic idea of Green Lantern’s Deal I’ve ever read. And Liam Sharp mostly does justice by it; I know some find his style off-putting and his anatomy wonky, but he sells the what-if-GL-was-a-2000AD-strip sensibility, and his work has a framing and structure and a tangible, doughy 3Dishness that recalls the flavor of some of Morirson’s best prior collaborations. Not that, to be clear, I don’t think plenty of those prior collaborators couldn’t have done a much better job with this, but I think this’ll pan out just fine.
On top of that a couple minor notes: I suspect David Uzumeri might have been right regarding the possibility that this could be the book where Morrison delves into the basic question of whether superheroes are by nature cops, and thereby police brutality (Maxim Tox and Hal himself both have some startlingly severe moments in here) and the moral feasibility of the whole business. Rather than rethinking his process in his time away, Morrison’s storytelling tics are as prominently on display here as just about anything he’s ever done. And I was genuinely shocked to see the acknowledgement of Manhattan in here - a landmark chapter in The Last War In Albion in the making if ever there was one - right alongside addressing Snyder’s Justice League, making this to my knowledge the only book in the company’s lineup to acknowledge both contenders to the throne of DC’s current actual Important Cosmic-Scale Story. I suppose Lantern is the place where that makes sense, but both bring interesting elements of their own, as with the Source Wall Morrison’s going right on in and acknowledging how other creators have brought his ideas and spirit to the forefront of the DCU in the last several years, and with Manhattan, having a Grant Morrison DC Comic acknowledge the presence of Watchmen characters as parts of the grand scheme of things makes that whole bizarre business feel real in a way even Doomsday Clock itself hasn’t for me.
Adventures of the Super Sons #4: What a charmer! I harped a lot on Pete Tomasi by and large sucking on Superman, because by and large he sucked on Superman, but put that dude on just the right project to play into his strengths and he absolutely shines.
The Dreaming #3: Wound up in my pull file since I’d unsubscribed so recently, and decided to give it one last chance. It’s pretty and confident in what it’s doing and I’m sure lots of people are rightfully getting a lot out of it, but I’m not one of them and it won’t be getting another shot.
Border Town #3: It feels odd to think this given how much positive attention it’s been getting and how well it’s sold for a modern Vertigo book, but Border Town absolutely still feels like the sleeper hit of 2018. It so feels like the sort of comic that I usually can acknowledge the quality of but doesn’t do it for me personally, so I keep picking it up expecting to not quite gel with a given issue, but each time I’m dead damn wrong. It’s brimming with energy and personality on every level, and it’s still early enough that I can’t possibly recommend enough that anyone who hasn’t given it a chance yet jump onboard.
The Wicked + The Divine: The Funnies: Speaking of titles that I can acknowledge the quality of but rarely do it for me, I’ve followed W + D from the beginning on the understanding that the fairly subdued joys I take from it on a month-by-month basis will be eclipsed by the scale of my love for it on a full reread, as was the case with the team’s Young Avengers. But boy did this one buck that trend, because it was a hoot. Honestly couldn’t tell you which was my favorite short, because like half the book is made up of front-runners.
Death of the Inhumans #5: Because Death of Some Inhumans, But Don’t Worry Not Any of the Good Ones, Other than Maximus wouldn’t have shifted as much copy. Donny Cates is establishing himself as a solid mid-tier superhero writer alongside your Tim Seeleys and James Tynions, and Ariel Olivetti’s a treat, but I have to call this one a miss.
Shatterstar #2: As I expected it didn’t grab me as much as the first issue since the tenants aren’t front-and-center, but I’m still digging it to a truly startling extent!
Marvel Knights #1: Okay? I mean, I liked it (aside from the unbelievably poorly-chosen ‘I can sort of see even though I’m blind’ line - had to be a dozen better ways of putting that), but aside from that it’s gritty and involves some of the characters with notable history in the imprint, I have no idea why this is the Marvel Knights 20th Anniversary book as opposed to just a random Marvel miniseries that I suppose could be published under that imprint if you wanted. The conceit feels so odd for the intended purpose.
The Immortal Hulk #8: This book is SO FUCKING GOOD ALL OF THE TIME AT EVERYTHING AND YOU ALL NEED TO BUY IT AND TELL YOUR FRIENDS ABOUT IT. CHRIST. Still the best super-shit on the stands.
DC Nation #6: Yanick Paquette needs to write Batman explaining science so as to teach us how to better fight crime for as long as he lives, if not in fact longer.
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steviemcfly · 7 years
Text
Side note: I saw Spider-Man: Homecoming the other day (a friend gave me a few movie passes), and these are my thoughts:
NON-SPOILER:
In the sequel(s), I want to see Bryan Cranston or Michael Shannon as Doc Ock, and I want to see Idris Elba as Norman Osborn/Green Goblin.
I love the John Hughes-iness of it.
Ned is clearly Ganke, which is one of the biggest indications (aside from screen tests with black actors that were confirmed during the negotiation process) that Marvel intended to do a Miles Morales movie before Sony demanded the character be white in those leaked e-mails from the character sharing negotiations. I like Tom Holland’s Peter Parker, and I’m not mad anymore, but man. I still wish they’d done a 1960s-set Peter Parker Spider-Man show for Netflix and had Miles Morales in the movies.
I like the diversity of the cast, and it really highlights just how universal the characters really are.
SPOILERS (below the cut):
I liked the Liz-as-Adrian’s-daughter twist. Most audiences probably just assumed she was a new love interest, but they set up comics nerds to assume she was Liz Allan. So when that reveal happened, I was genuinely surprised. I was like, “Oh yeah, they never actually said her last name, there was little reason for me to be so sure she was Liz Allan.”
I didn’t like the “Michelle is MJ” twist. I thought it was corny when they did it with Joe Blake being Robin at the end of The Dark Knight Rises, but that was the end of that series, so they didn’t have to actually follow that thread. In this case, they’d have to make effort to retcon it if they decided to take another approach going forward. If they hadn’t said her name at all until the end (there was no narrative reason to mention it prior, except to throw us off the scent so the twist would land), but revealed it to be Gwen, that would have been cool. Gwen Stacy has been portrayed a number of different ways over the years, and that could have been cool. I really love the Michelle character as written and played, and I’m glad to see more going forward. But MJ is supposed to be this unattainable girl that people underestimate because of her appearance--including Peter--which creates a lot of territory to explore. How people experience beauty, the assumptions people make about feminine women, the ways men (even the best-intentioned) perpetuate bullshit expectations and project the same things onto women who fall into certain categories of gender expression and/or aesthetic sensibility. I have no doubt the character is going to be dope, but I think they could have explored more with an MJ that’s more like the one in the comics, especially since they did literally none of that sort of sociopolitical exploration in Raimi’s trilogy and MJ didn’t make it into Webb’s movies.
Ned’s last name is Leeds. Is he gonna be Hobgoblin eventually? Are they gonna skip Green Goblin? Are they setting us up for that? I hope not. That would be a bizarre choice.
I thought it was an odd choice having Flash not be a meathead jock, but I did like this version of the character.
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Spider-Man: Life Story #2 Thoughts
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 Very mixed feelings....again
SPOILERS
 Let me get this out the way Bagley is the man on this book.  Beautiful art work, beautiful  colouring, the works. I especially love him drawing a MJ reminiscent of his 90s take on her but with more modern art flourishes.
Now onto the nitty gritty.
For the last issue I said I had mixed feelings because the premise for Life Story seemed at odds with what was advertised.
Reading ahead for the solicits for the series it became clear that what we were apparently going to get was the events of Spider-Man’s life playing out in real time wherein each of the stories still happened in the decade/time period they originally occurred in but Peter himself would just be the age he’d realistically have been. For example if Peter was 15 in 1962 then in theory when he deals with Kraven’s Last Hunt in 1987 he’d be 40.
Reading this issue though...even THAT isn’t what this book actually is.
What this book actually is... is Chip Zdarsky’s fanfiction.
It’s just a general Alternate Universe.
It’s not even a What If wherein you presume history to be the same up to a point of divergence then explore the repercussions of that divergence.
Like you’d think wouldn’t you that the changes in Spider-Man’s history would be as the natural result of either him aging in real time or him or at least the natural repercussions of dealing with real life history more realistically. Like you’d have thought in the last issue Norman Osborn going to jail would be because of the Vietnam War in some way.
Nope.
He goes to jail because Peter just decides in this universe to spill the beans on him.
Even before that Peter’s history was different because how and when Norman confronted Peter about his identity was radically different as well, not to mention Gwen learning his secret.
Gwen is perhaps the centrepiece of why this is just fanfiction and nothing more.
Zdarsky is very plainly a Gwen stan and you can tell from this as well as his OTHER alternate universe in his Spec run where he had Gwen and Peter also end up together.
So here Gwen and Peter got married and were married for a long while and that’s the status quo we’re jumping into.
Gag me.
But it goes deeper than that.
I’ve never been impressed by Zdarksy as a Spider-Man writer and this issue is perhaps a microcosm of why.
This story, this series had a central premise but that’s not the real premise the real premise is for this to be just Chip Zdarksy randomly remixing and changing pieces of Spider-Man’s history anyway he desires.
Like He’s going to vaguely hit certain beats per decade.
In the 1960s Norman will find out who he is and Flash will join the army.
In the 1970s Gwen will die and maybe MJ and Peter will hook up and there will be clones.
In the 1980s if the cover is to be believed he will be buried alive.
In the 1990s we’re probably getting clones.
But it’s superficial. It’s hitting the beats in spirit but not in sunbstance.
Gwen for instance does not die via a bridge, a Goblin and a misplaced webline.
She dies because Harry (not Norman) throws a bomb at a clone of Gwen stuck in a test tube who was actually the real Gwen.
The issue’s quality honestly very much depends upon how far you personally are willing to buy this AU as being just randomly different.
Because of the false advertising it’s curtailing my enjoyment for sure.
But more than this my enjoyment is curtailed because an awful lot of the changes I strongly suspect are not the result of Zdarsky actively choosing to change things but Zdarksy simply being a crap writer and not understanding the characters in general. Also just being bad at common sense things in his writing.
Let’s go through some of those things:
·         Mary Jane getting drunk. Nope. Sorry. Mary Jane was all about her party girl facade and keeping people at a distance, she’d never have compromised her cover and potentially allowed herself to lose control like that. She loved to party and yeah probably enjoyed alcohol but in a controlled manner
  ·         MJ chewing out Peter for allowing Flash to die. WTF was that? MJ knew Peter was Spider-Man and was alternatively sympathetic towards him or else repressed that knowledge because it upset her. It took the Puma invading his home and endangering her life very directly after YEARS for her to finally let that out. Here she sips one too many martinis and it slips out? Not to mention MJ NEVER blamed Peter for Gwen’s death nor Captain Stacy’s. She understood that he couldn’t do everything even with his power and that was when she knew Peter was the guy who literally snapped Gwen’s neck by accident. Does she blame Iron Man and Giant Man for also allowing Flash to die. How does she, or Peter in fact, know Peter would’ve been in Flash’s platoon to protect him in the first place?
    ·         MJ being engaged to Harry. ARE YOU SERIOUS! MJ had COMMTMENT ISSUES why the fuck would she be engaged to him! She also never regarded their relationship as serious at all and broke up with him FFS! This is like screwing up Peter’s origin!
  ·         MJ and Peter tolerate Harry’s drug abuse. Errrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr what?????????????????? Peter ‘guilt/responsibility’ Parker...just sits back and allows his best friend to kill himself with drugs? Mary Jane does that too? MJ whom it was implied in the Drug Trilogy KNEW about Harry’s problem and drifted away from him because of it? WTF Zdarksy.
    ·         MJ is...a DJ...Um....huh? I suspect all of the above can be explained via Zdarksy adopting a simplistic, superficial and frankly possibly somewhat sexist attitude to MJ’s ‘party girl’ label
  ·          Why is Norman still in jail? We know from Marvel Knights he had a contingency in place if he was ever jailed wherein Aunt May would be kidnapped and Peter thus forced to liberate him, a plan he had in place since shortly after he found out Peter’s identity. In this universe Norman knew Peter’s secret for ages BEFORE acting on it so he had plenty of time to dream up that plan but here the plan he made AFTER he was jailed was to get his son to hire a professor to create a clone of himself upon which to pin the blame for his crimes???? That doesn’t even make sense since it doesn’t exonerate him!
  The general public would just find out that in spite of the overwhelming evidence the Green Goblin wasn’t Norman Osborn just someone who looked like and had his exact genetics (could genetic science even detect a difference between an original or a clone back in the 1970s?). How does that exonerate him? Wouldn’t someone question if maybe Norman just had the clone created after the fact which is exactly what he did?
    Why even go to the trouble of doing that, you might as well have someone with plastic surgery or a mask look like Norman Osborn and reveal they framed Norman for some reason. Or have ANYONE ELSE dress up as the Goblin instead, like Harry for instance instead of having him be...ugh...the Black Goblin...In Hobgoblin Lives Macendale revealing he wasn’t the original Hobgoblin created enough doubt that his case stood a better chance surely Norman could pull the same trick...you know....like he has in canon...twice...Also what was Norman’s plan anyway, the clone of himself gets jailed then he gets free and then...he goes back to being the Goblin...what?????????????
·         Norman considering Peter his true heir makes no sense. Yeah eventually Norman dreamed up that scheme but it took him years and multiple defeats by Peter whilst feeling harry was a failure. In this universe none of that history is there, he even respects Harry to a degree so why would he feel Peter was the better choice for his heir?
  ·         Norman dreamed up the clone scheme because he wanted to shatter Peter’s sense of identity. If his hang up was Peter would make a great heir for himself back during the Clone Saga or even after why the fuck did he try to recruit the real Peter instead of just creating a clone for himself? Because to Norman a clone is genuinely a lesser, not a true person at all. So why make a clone Peter in the first place?
    ·         Why do the clones of Peter and Gwen adopt the last names ‘Parker’. Surely a guy called ‘Ben Parker’ who looks just like Peter Parker, who’d dead uncle was Ben Parker, who is also married to a woman who looks like Peter Parker’s dead wife, named after the mother of Peter Parker’s dead mother-in-law would raise some questions. Was Zdarsky really so adverse to just calling them ‘Ben and Helen Reilly’
  ·         I get that they are both clones but the implication here is that Ben and ‘Helen’ are now in a relationship. Why? Ben couldn’t possibly have all of Peter’s up to date memories and Helen was presumed to be the real Gwen ever since she and Peter got married (I’ll explain why in a moment). That means from Helen’s point of view the man she married and was in love with was Peter and not Ben and from Peter’s point of view, sure he married a clone and not the real deal but...so what? From MJ’s point of view in the 1990s Clone Saga most of her relationship with Peter, including their marriage had actually been with the clone not the real Peter, but he was the person she had that history with and was in love with. Helen IS the woman Peter loved and married and she even implies as much when she states because she has all of Gwen’s memories she and MJ will always be friends. So why are she and Peter breaking up? Why is Peter acting like the woman he actually married and had many years of matrimony with dead when in effect he loved two identical women and one of them died. He’s acting like he’s a widower and Helen is meaningless which doesn’t make any sense. Same with Helen, she’s just hooking up with Ben because he’s a clone like her and is nearly identical to her husband but...he isn’t. Peter is the man she loves, Ben hasn’t got all his memories or anything. It’s just a mess
  ·         What was Warren’s plan here? Replace the real Gwen with a clone, put her in a test tube and then somehow this will allow him to be with her? I know Warren is nuts but his mania when it comes to Gwen always made sense within his warped logic
  ·         Warren cloning Gwen and giving her away doesn’t even make sense. Warren only cloned Gwen because she died, he wanted to in a sense bring her back to life. He never tried to clone her when she was alive and practically engaged with Peter. He didn’t even like the idea of any version of Gwen potentially being with Peter, which is why he created a clone of himself to hook up with the Gwen clone he created. Here he’s created a clone of Gwen to what? Trick Peter into marrying the fake while he gets to keep the real one in mint condition in a tank? What??????????????????
  ·         The reason I say Helen must have been the one who married Peter is because there is no way in Hell Warren would have walked the real Gwen down the aisle to marry Peter. Not ever. But if that is the intention...it makes no sense
  ·         Why is Warren nice to Peter? In those silver age stories he was gruff and not that nice to him a lot of the time precisely because he was jealous of him. What, because he has the real Gwen that means he’s okay with Peter?
  ·         Doc Ock is a reformed bad guy because in spite of the age difference and the fact that he’s nearly died multiple times (like I dunno in the accident that gave him his powers in the first place) marrying Aunt May and having a heart attack made him change his ways. Um...no...No, no, no those things would absolutely not cause Doc Ock to change his ways. He never really loved Aunt May, he just had affection for her because of his own Mommy issues and he’s nearly died countless times. Like surely the fact that he remained a villain after all those times, including his near death misses across Superior Spider-Man and Slott’s run, barely sort of reforming right at the end of ASM #800, is proof Doc Ock isn’t the guy who stops to smell the roses after a near miss. Not to mention in this universe I guess Spider-Man didn’t stop the wedding in time so Otto actually married Aunt May and then...was content to just wait until she died to get that island she inherited....
  ·         Zdarsky apparently loved those Marc Webb movies because he not only wrote Gwen closer to Emma Stone, not only shipped her with Peter, but also leaned in on the Osborn sickness thing and decided to borrow the whole ‘Peter is a better son than you Harry’ angle from the Raimi movies too. Because why use the real canon I guess
  ·         Why does anyone blame Peter for not helping Flash when fucking Iron Man and Giant Man are in Vietnam too?
  ·         Why kill Flash? Again, wasn’t this series supposed to be Spider-Man’s life just in real time? You’ve just blown up all those Hobgoblin and Agent Venom stories playing out in real time because you wanted to do something arbitrarily different that also wanted to pretend like MJ would be super angry about Flash dying because Peter could have saved him...somehow...what?
  ·         I’m sorry but...how the Hell is the Vietnam War still happening if Iron Man and Giant Man are involved? In the actual 1960s-1970s you had to suspend your disbelief about heroes involved in the war because realistically they would have altered it’s outcome, much as Superman could’ve ended WWII in a day. But in this AU Captain America, Iron Man AND Giant Man, super powered beings with immense intelligence and tech resources are actively involved in the war. Why the fuck are the Viet Cong still a thing at that point. I’m not trying to diss the real life Viet Cong, but realistically they might be able to fend off the then contemporary united states military but IRON MAN too? No absolutely not, Stark would’ve found a way to deal with them very easily just as Doctor Manhattan did in Watchmen
  ·         Why is Iron Man even involved? Wasn’t Tony Stark’s whole origin about him realizing weapons are bad, war profiteering is bad, it hurts everyone. Why then is he using his weapon of war, the Iron Man armour, to help fight the Viet Cong??????????????????
  ·         And on top of all this shit...the timeline doesn’t even make sense. This is essentially the Clone Saga/the Death of Gwen Stacy reference right? Okay cool...the latter happened in 1973 and the former in 1975...so why the fuck does this issue happen in 1977 with the epilogue in 1978????????????????????
  I guess if you just entirely turn your brain off and treat this as akin to the Ultimate Universe where things are different for the sake of being different and all the riffing on the original history is fanservice then it’s enjoyable enough.
  But as advertised, as obviously intended...its immensely problematic.
  And frankly, once and for all this issue alone has convinced me Zdarksy is not a good Spider-Man writer because he clearly does not get these characters.
  P.S. The redesigned costume looked...nice....but again it plays into the ‘this is different for the sake of being different’ thing rather than actually being a change that’d be natural due to the alterations in history.
  P.P.S. Once again the real life historical aspects of the issue aren’t really relevant to the primary plot of the issue, and are window dressing at best. Actually they’re even more window dressing that issue #1
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eridianshores-blog · 7 years
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The MCU vs the DCEU
Warning: There be spoilers ahead! The films Man of Steel, Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice, and Suicide Squad are discussed at length! Many of the films in the MCU are discussed in more general ways as well. Continue at your own risk!
Which do you like better?
I want to like what DC is doing better, but it’s pretty obvious that Marvel is doing the better job with its characters.  Honestly I wish Marvel had chosen a different set of characters to follow rather than the Avengers.  I get that there’s a lot of legal shit tangled up with all that, but it doesn’t change that I don’t see heroes like Iron Man, Hulk, Captain America, etc. as superstar heroes.  I think the X-Men would’ve been the strongest starting point - and for the record I’m not the biggest fan of the existing X-Men movies or the mega-focus on Wolverine.  However, I think the modern MCU approach towards the X-Men might’ve worked out alright.
Before we really get into it I guess I should clue you in as to my level of “experience.”  Throughout this entry I am talking purely about films - those that are official a part of the Marvel Cinematic Universe and the DC Extended Universe.  I realize that Marvel’s TV shows take place in the same universe, but I haven’t seriously watched any of them so they’re excluded.  DC’s TV shows take place in an entirely separate universe (do they all even exist in the same one?) so obviously they’ll be left out of these talks as well.
I’ve seen all 3 DCEU films and I’ve seen them multiple times; I’d say I know them pretty well.  When it comes to the MCU though, I’m a little more in the dark.  I’ve seen Avengers 1 & 2 several times along with Civil War.  I’ve also watched all 3 Iron Man’s, Hulk, the first Thor, and Guardians of the Galaxy.  I know, I’ve missed a lot, but I do feel like I’ve seen enough of the earlier films to say what I want to say here.  Feel free to disagree or tell me where a movie directly contradicts something I’ve said, I’m cool with it.  Honestly I wouldn’t mind seeing the rest of the MCU movies just to see them, but most of them are still $20 and I’m not ready to shell out a couple hundred bucks for movies that I know I probably won’t love.
I would safely say that it’s difficult to discuss this “Golden Age” of superhero movies without at least acknowledging what came before.  I’m familiar with a lot of the older stuff, such as the first 4 Batman films, the first 4 Superman films, and Nolan’s Dark Knight trilogy, plus other random oddities like Spawn, Steel, Blade, and probably others I can’t remember. My knowledge is patchy when it comes to those early years of superhero movies where all kinds of shit was cranked out: Daredevil, Elektra, those couple of Punisher flicks, Hellboy, Raimi’s Spider-Man’s, Sony’s Spider-Man’s, all those damn X-Men and Wolverine movies, Green Lantern, Green Hornet, the Fantastic Four movies, Catwoman, the Ghost Rider movies, and what might’ve been the best of all of them, Superman Returns.  I’ve actually seen a fair number of these in passing, and truthfully, it kind of turned me off to superhero movies by the time Marvel started figuring out what went right and what went wrong and started something new.
When it comes to the DC guys, I like a lot of the heroes they’ve chose to focus on better.  I mean you’ve got Batman and Superman, heroes who Marvel is hard-pressed to compete with.  I also like the idea of getting into Wonder Woman’s story.  Beyond that we’ve got a rich Bat-family which, if handled correctly, could be great to see onscreen: characters like Robin, Nightwing, Red Hood, Batgirl, Red Robin, the Outsiders, etc.  When it comes to potential, I think DC has a slight edge.  Now when it comes to actual execution, well, DC could learn a thing or two or three or four from the MCU.
A big reason why the MCU is so successful is because it started out slow, making easily digestible, standalone movies that basically anyone could sit down and follow from start to finish.  They didn’t rely on the viewer’s extant knowledge of the source material, they didn’t over-extend themselves with complicated plot lines, and they weren’t too heavy-handed with placing references to future films.  Most of them are also fairly light-hearted and don’t take themselves too seriously, further increasing their appeal across multiple demographics.
The plots of these early movies have never been anything stunning; instead, the focus of the films has been largely on characterization.  I will admit that, for the most part, the various writers and directors have done a pretty good job at achieving this goal.  By the time the first ensemble film rolls around we’ve developed a decent rapport with most of the characters...there’s some unevenness that’s not beyond criticism, but the intent is clear and by the time everyone is on screen together it feels more or less natural.
Moving back over to the DCEU for a minute, they haven’t done anything close to the MCU’s approach, except for possibly Man of Steel, although it was tonally different than the standalone(ish) MCU movies (we’ll get to that soon). In defense of the DCEU, I’ve heard some say, “well they don’t have to do it like Marvel does!”  Obviously they don’t have to, but the problem is that DC is so blatantly and desperately trying to get themselves where the MCU already is minus a dozen or so films.
Let’s break it down real quick: Man of Steel was a pretty good flick in my opinion.  I’d probably say it’s the best Superman film so far.  Say what you want about the old Donner films, but they’ve become quite dated over the years and the bar for superhero movies has risen well above spandex and Hackman’s cartoonish version of Lex Luthor.  The movie is a little too long and structured oddly, but it’s one of those things that makes a lot more sense the second time around.  Unfortunately, as the beginning of the DCEU, it shouldn’t take repeated viewings to “get it.”  
Already Man of Steel is a) not easily digestible, b) over-extending itself, and c) not light-hearted at all.  Personally I think some of the “Clark Kent wanders the earth” scenes should’ve been cut, and the rest of them should’ve been put in order to give us a more linear experience.  As it is, apart from the spectacular intro sequence, the first half of the movie jumps between present day and some random point in Superman’s past as a child / teen / young adult on earth.  I think it’s actually a pretty good origin story, it’s just too jumpy to get into and the non-linear format is going to be a huge turn off to most moviegoers.  Normally I don’t give a shit about what appeals to “most moviegoers,” but the problem is that this format doesn’t seem to be done for any real reason.  I think it would be more interesting to watch Superman grow into his powers over the years and go through these changes with him rather than the scattershot backstory we’re given.
It’s not all bad though.  MoS differs from the MCU in one important way: the darker tone.  I said that the MCU could attribute part of its success to the lighter flavor of their films and I still believe that, but for me personally, I like the darker and more serious feel of Man of Steel.  Call me crazy, but if it was up to me, all this shit would be straight up R-rated, no holds barred, balls-to-the-wall crazy shit.  I know it would destroy the commercial viability of the films, this is just what I’d prefer from a purely artistic standpoint.  Anyway, the DCEU has caught criticism for not being as “fun” as the MCU, but I see this as a good thing.  I just don’t care for all the wisecracks and one-liners from Tony Stark or the fish-out-of-water giggles courtesy of Captain America, or the Sam Jackson-ization of Nick Fury...I know a lot of folks eat this shit up but it isn’t for me.  I don’t mind some subtle humor or the insertion of an honest to God good joke, but lightening the mood just to, well, lighten the mood, feels like pandering to all the wrong fans.
Man of Steel is a somber film.  Superman is genuinely confused about his place in the world.  He watches his adoptive father die.  He deals with surviving Kryptonians who attempt to embrace him only to find that he doesn’t share their ideals, yet earth isn’t ready to accept him either.  We get a lot of inner conflict from this guy who’s basically invincible.  If you can forgive or at least look past the missteps in pacing and structure, there’s a very human story at the movie’s core about acceptance and identity.  And this is where the serious tone makes all the difference.  When the film takes itself seriously, I take it seriously.  In the MCU, it’s hard for me to truly accept that the end of the world is on the way when we’re being treated to sarcastic quips and sight gags involving Iron Man’s armor.
Until now, I’ve only addressed the first half of MoS.  The second half is well worth the wait and one of the most worthy climaxes of any superhero film to date.  I love that Superman is up against a real threat - Zod turns out to be Superman’s equal; his inexperience with earth’s environment is compensated by his tremendous combat skills and military training.  Some have criticized the battle as overly long, but I think it’s awesome.  I also think it’s clearer and less muddled than some of the big MCU fights, namely those in Avengers and Avengers 2.  The way these 2 titans decimate Metropolis is spectacular.
A lot of people criticize Superman’s killing of General Zod, saying stuff like, “why didn’t he just cover Zod’s eyes,” or a number of other things.  I hopped on this bandwagon for a while, but then I got to thinking, and I think the point of the gesture was to show that nothing short of death was going to stop the General.  Whether it was today or tomorrow or in 200 years, Zod was a zealot who would never, ever stop.  Maybe Superman didn’t have to kill Zod right that second, but I think that in that moment, Superman realized there was no other way for this to end, especially after the already monumental loss of life.  Alternatively, maybe the DCEU Superman is OK with killing in some circumstances...I don’t know that we’re ever treated to a scene where Superman vows never to take a life.  Batman’s behavior in BvS lends some possible credence to this theory, as he very plainly takes the lives of some of the thugs in the car chase.
Besides the increased seriousness over the MCU, another plus in the Man of Steel column is the presence of a strong villain who drives the plot.  General Zod was a fantastic villain precisely because he didn’t see himself as a “bad guy.”  He saw himself as a visionary, a pioneer, the savior of an extinct race, the one avenue of possibility that his people had of living on.  And can we really blame him?  Would the last (or one of the last) humans simply shrug their shoulders in resignation about the death of their species, culture, society, everything?  If there was any possibility, wouldn’t they at least entertain the thought?  What if the last human landed on a planet full of ants and could potentially bring back the human race at the cost of all the ants’ lives?  What if it was a planet full of dogs?  Gorillas?  Homo erectus?  Where do you draw the line?
In some ways Zod’s arc was one of tragedy, aside from what could be considered treason back on Krypton.  (Although sometimes there is a very fine line between sedition and patriotism.)  General Zod didn’t fight for himself, or for power, or for material gain, he fought for the rebirth of his people.  Sure, he didn’t mind killing all of earth’s population to do so, but this was just a side-effect of terraforming; I don’t think it’s necessarily a case of Zod being hellbent on destroying humanity just for the hell of it.
Now Man of Steel doesn’t exactly go out of its way to portray General Zod as a sympathetic character, and I guess that’s OK...I think the most important thing to take away from the film is that the writers actually spent some time on General Zod.  They took the time to develop him and give him some depth.  Movies in the MCU have very deliberately chosen to not focus on the villains except as a means to an end.  Loki is the closest thing we’ve ever really had to a well-developed antagonist.  If you look at the other bad guys - Whiplash, Ultron, Ronan, Abomination, Mandarin (ugh) - they’re as flimsy as a wet noodle and twice as forgettable.  I’m not saying we necessarily have to care about the villains, but the core conflict between hero and villain should be adequately explored.  Instead, the MCU seems more content to use bad guys as a way to tell us more about the good guys.  There’s nothing wrong with that, it’s just that it seems like that’s all the villains are good for.
I even remember reading a statement from one of the directors or producers or some big-wig over at Marvel Studios where they said that these films weren’t about the villains, but that they were about the heroes.  Is this really the right way to go?  Could this be why the MCU films feel a little less than awesome to me?  I don’t need a film specifically about Whiplash or Ultron or whoever, but I do want the film to center on the conflict between hero and villain, and not on some other situation whereby the villain basically ends up being a consequence of whatever else is going on.  Marvel should know as well as anyone that heroes and villains do a lot to define each other, and I think they’re making a huge mistake by giving such unequal focus to the 2 parties.
This may also have something to do with Marvel’s picks not having the most memorable of villains.  One of their biggest cards - Thanos - has been teased for the last 8 years or so and everyone else has been sort of bleh.  (Though that’s not really an excuse; the MCU could make them not-bleh if they tried.)  Iron Man doesn’t have a Joker to go up against, Captain America doesn’t have an Apocalypse, etc.  I’d really like to see MCU change this as time goes on.  Sure, maybe we don’t know as much about these bad guys, but that’s precisely why Marvel should spend some time introducing these villains and fleshing them out.
Let’s shift back to DCEU’s shortcomings as we get into Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice.  I don’t really know where to start with this one.  I appreciate the film’s ambition and scope, but the story is so choppy and muddled plus DC made a really weird decision to adapt this particular story/stories this early in their timeline.
Marvel quietly did its thing with the standalone flicks and established not only its characters but also the world in which they live.  The DCEU barely got started on this with MoS.  BvS picks up 18 months later and throws us smack into a whirlwind of plot threads where the only thing capable of keeping the viewer afloat is previous knowledge of the comics.  One thing I found 100% bizarre was that the entire film was predicated on the loss of life resulting from the battle between Superman and Zod.  What I don’t understand is how anyone can hold Superman responsible.  Yes, a shit ton of people died, but if Superman hadn’t done anything, it’s highly probable that everyone on the fucking planet would’ve died.  Even if some other random heroes came out of left field to stop Zod, he’d probably at least level Metropolis before they made any progress.  How can anyone even begin to blame Superman for the loss of life?  If Superman hadn’t done anything, all those same people would’ve died any damn way as Zod’s World Engine thoroughly raped the shit out of Metropolis.  Why the fuck does this point seem to be lost on every fucking person in BvS, especially Senator Finch and damn Batman!!??
Aside from the aforementioned stupidity, I can understand Batman’s trepidation about Superman.  He’s super powerful, we don’t really know much about him, and even though he basically saved the world, it’s still difficult to predict his future intentions or actions.  The film had some interesting subject matter to work with, but it’s really hard to put together a coherent story out of what’s going on.  We’re always jumping from one setting to another, maybe with different characters, we’ve got no clue how much time is passing, and we don’t really get any quality time with any of our characters.  It’s extremely hard to make an emotional connection with anyone in this film.
This next point hits at the DCEU on a deeper level, but it’s a point worth making.  Excuse my French, but quite frankly, DC blew its load way way way too damn early.  I guess I can understand DC’s decision not to want to produce the second Batman origin story inside of 10 or 11 years, but they didn’t have to jump forward 20 years into Batman’s career.  We’ve got 2 huge DC events wrapped into one here: The Dark Knight Returns / Batman vs. Superman, and the Death of Superman.  
Of all things, Ben Affleck as an older, hardened, more weathered Batman / Bruce Wayne actually works fairly well.  The problem is that he spends a lot more time as Bruce Wayne and we don’t get to know much about his whole Batman side.  Hell, we don’t even really spend any time in the Batman mythos - we’re fully steeped in Superman mythos and Batman is just sort of a “guest.”  The actual fight between the Dark Knight and the Man of Steel is viscerally satisfying, but the problem is that we don’t have any emotional investment in either of the characters.  Yeah, we’ve sortta bonded with Cavill’s version of Superman, and yeah, the film works very hard to make sure we understand Batman’s perception of Superman (even though we know he’s not the problem) so there’s some emotional resonance there, but it doesn’t achieve nearly what it could 4 or 5 years down the road and with a little more DCEU context to draw from.  Think about it: the stakes would be so much higher if we were 10 or 20 films deep and the possibility of Batman or Superman dying was more real.  But the death of such a giant so soon?  Not even.
Furthermore, we know that neither Batman or Superman is going to die (nor is one going to be responsible for the death of the other) this early in the DCEU, so in many ways the fight is predictable.  I mean I love Batman’s preparation and I love his ingenuity and I really dig that he basically won the fight, it just bugs me that there was so much more potential that’s ultimately been squandered forever.  However, we did get one amazing quote out of the whole thing and Affleck actually delivered it perfectly:  “Breathe in.  That’s fear.  You’re not brave.  Men are brave.  I bet your parents taught you that you mean something, that you’re here for a reason.  My parents taught me a different lesson, dying in the gutter, for no reason at all.  They taught me the world only makes sense if you force it to.  You were never a god.  You were never even a man.”
Then of course we have the big battle with Doomsday (who’s never quite named, Luthor simply introduces it to Superman as “your doomsday”), the stuff with Wonder Woman, the kryptonite spear blah blah blah and Superman apparently dies.  We all know damn well Superman isn’t dead (especially with the announcement of a Justice League film for God’s sake) so what the fuck is the point?  Why have him “die” when we know it isn’t real?  There’s no emotional impact.  It feels like nothing more than setup for another movie.  I mean seriously, the death of Superman could’ve been a big deal.  It could’ve been a major turning point in the DCEU...but instead, it’s just a wasted gesture.  The first time I saw BvS I sat there and thought why are they even including this!?  It’s not even like we think he’s not dead, or he’s probably not dead, or maybe he’ll come back one day...we straight up know that he’s not dead!  C’mon DCEU.  Seriously.
We’ve also glossed over a good deal of Batman’s backstory, which is why we really should’ve had some sort of DCEU Batman film to introduce him.  We know that the Joker has come and gone and we also know that Batman has become a little less idyllic and a little more disillusioned and less principled than the version we typically think of.  It’s very obvious that he’s already spent a long time fighting crime and that what he’s seen and done has had a profound effect on him.  This is not Batman in his prime.  This is Batman in his golden years.  Nothing wrong with that, but it just seems like a really strange way to introduce a character.  Of course the films can play with time and we can certainly have movies that take place earlier, but this could potentially make for a very messy shared universe.
The relationship between Batman and Alfred was also pretty lousy.  Batman was too old and Alfred was too young; there was no father-son chemistry between the two, it was more like Alfred was Batman’s hacker-sidekick.  Batman at his best is a lone wolf, and it’s through Alfred that we often learn a lot about who “Bruce Wayne” / Batman truly is.  The relationship here was poorly, poorly handled.
Jessie Eisenberg as Lex Luthor was the casting travesty that we all thought Affleck as Batman was going to be.  He’s squirrely, twitchy, nervous and neurotic...nothing like the charismatic business man that Luthor was.  Luthor was always a super-nerd underneath, but on the exterior he was smooth and debonair...this version is unlikeable to the core and worst of all, way too young.  The role itself was interesting enough and fit into the film appropriately; the problem is that the role just wasn’t Lex Luthor.
Forever ago I said that the early MCU films were good about not dropping too many setups and whatnot for future films.  Well in their desperation, DC filled BvS with this crap.  We get the whole Wonder Woman / Flash / Aquaman / Cyborg montage which was basically pointless. we get Wayne’s dream-sequence with Flash (durr huh?) and most egregious of all, every single scene with Wonder Woman.  I appreciate seeing Wonder Woman on screen as much as anyone, and I think she has great potential as the focus of a movie, but there is just no reason in the world for her to be involved in the events of BvS.  It’d be nice if we at least had some kind of bullshit reason why she got involved, but we don’t.  She’s just there for the audience to get familiar with and to do 99% of the Doomsday asskicking.  I mean she looked great and I enjoyed watching her hold her own against Doomsday, but that doesn’t change that she just didn’t really belong in the film.
The movie is better with repeated viewings, but it’s not as good as Man of Steel.  I still want to know why why why DC chose to inject some of its biggest moments into the DCEU so early.  Let’s get on to number 3...
DC chose to go in a really weird direction for its third outing.  Forget Batman and Superman, let’s take a bunch of third and fourth rate villains and make them the protagonists of the movie! Why oh why was this a starting point for...anything!?  We could’ve had a Batman movie dealing with the Joker and Harley; instead we have Harley’s introduction, but since Harley can’t really exist without the Joker, we have the Joker and Harley’s backstory sortta forcefully wedged into all this Suicide Squad stuff....even though the Joker has nothing to do with the Suicide Squad.  Had this been done correctly, we’d already know who Harley was, have no need for the Joker, and more time could’ve been spent on Suicide Squad’s simultaneously confusing and inept plot - maybe we could’ve even delved into the romance between Harley and Deadshot...?
It’s hard to give a shit about most of these people.  Captain Boomerang (I feel goofy just typing that) could’ve been introduced in a Flash movie.  Maybe we could’ve gotten a sort of “Bat-family” movie where we see Katana as a member of the outsiders and another Bat-villain like Deadshot or Killer Croc.  I feel like we should’ve been somewhat familiar with at least half the squad, and very familiar with at least 2 of ‘em.  Trying to mix origin stories and “team: assemble” plots is too much for a typical movie to handle.
The good news is that Suicide Squad starts off as something different and quirky.  We have the goofy intros, Amanda Waller’s ball-busting dialog, and an overall interesting perspective on the average superhero movie.  Oooh a watching a bunch of bad guys is gonna be fun but how are they gonna make us care about them?  Turns out that the movie has a hard time answering this question.  We had a pretty good movie on our hands up until the (first) helicopter crash and we spend 15 minutes watching everyone walk down 37 alleyways and talk to everyone else.  
Once the real fighting starts things become a little formulaic.  Deadshot and Flagg form some kinda insta-bond over God-knows-what with Deadshot saying shit like, “I gotcha back!”  Katana sides with the criminals despite professing that she isn’t one.  Harley, believing that the Joker is dead, decides the best place for her is the squad, despite being 100% free to go (since Joker disabled her neck explosive nanite thingy).  Croc says something that could almost be considered selfless and heroic when it’s time to plant the underwater bomb.  Seriously, we have all these hardened criminals who suddenly begin talking utter nonsense and copious amounts of cheese.  This total shit is laughably epitomized when Diablo, seconds before his self-sacrifice, says, “I already lost one family, I ain’t losin’ another!”  BWAHAHAHAHA what?
The movie skips straight from “expendable thugs” to “mildly heroic individuals, all capable of redemption” and skips the middle.  Suicide Squad really needed to break with convention to stay true to itself, and although it held for a while, unfortunately it slipped straight into the conventions that make this type of movie unsuccessful.  I can understand having one character capable of or in search of redemption - El Diablo - and one totally bad seed who just doesn’t get it - seems to be Boomerang judging by the ending - but this little mission doesn’t cure Harley of crazy, or diminish Deadshot’s capacity for killing strangers for money, or undo the lifetime of mistreatment that turned Croc to “Killer.”  It’s not just hokey, it’s bad writing.  And it’s made even worse after what was a largely successful first act.
Even if you push all that aside, we’re still left with DC’s penchant for crafting nonsensical plots.  Do we ever really get any explanation for all this shit with the Enchantress?  Waller keeps her heart in a box to control her but it doesn’t control her but she still needs it to destroy the world even though she’s already summoned her “brother” who seems perfectly capable of destroying the world himself.  Huh?  And why was what’s-his-name included?  Slipknot, that’s right...just to prove the nanite bombs work?  Just to prove that Waller and Flagg are basically just as sick, twisted, and cold-hearted as their team full of criminals?
And then there’s that scene when they “complete” their first mission, just to find Waller in a room surveilling...something.  What the hell did any of that even mean?  And then Waller just executes like 4 or 5 government employees for what reason?  I mean I just don’t understand any of that shit.  It doesn’t really bode well for the squad either, as it basically just pushes them all away - well, until Flagg somehow inspires them to be a team and get shit done - or what the fuck ever.
The showdown with Enchantress and her bro isn’t as dazzling as it should be.  First of all, from what we’ve seen of the pair and what they’re capable of, there’s no reason that they shouldn’t have been able to wipe the floor with at least half of the Suicide Squad before they even blinked.  Diablo’s Aztec-God Kotal Khan form was pretty damn convincing as a worthy adversary for the duo, but Harley and her baseball bat...?  Boomerang and some boomerangs?  Flagg and a gun?  What the fuck are they even doing here?  The Suicide Squad really should’ve gone up against something a little more human for their first outing.  Most of them are basically normal - crazy, but physiologically normal.  Croc has his strength, Katana has no inherent powers but she does have a somewhat mystic sword, Diablo of course has “real powers,” but the rest of them are just highly skilled at whatever.  And we’re supposed to buy that they went up against this 6,000 year old witch and prevailed with a few dead government red shirts and a couple of scratches?
I’m also not sure how much I agree with how the whole “Suicide Squad” concept is handled.  The whole point was that a bunch of ho-hum villains were thrown together to pull off crazy jobs for the government and that it didn’t really matter if they died because a) they’re bad guys, and b) they’re fairly insignificant bad guys.  We don’t really get a “real” death in the movie, at least not one that’s caused by the “dangerous mission” at hand.  Slipknot dies, but it’s just because he’s an idiot and because climbing / grappling is a stupid “power.”  Diablo also bites the dust, but it’s an act of self-sacrifice.  This goes back to what I just said in the previous paragraph, but couldn’t the Enchantress take a least one of them out in the heat of battle?  A quick blade through the chest?  Maybe one of those weird molten-metal-Matrix-tree-branch appendages from her brother?  Deadshot and Harley have too much star power to go down - I’ll accept that.  Boomerang is perhaps too worthless to matter, but what about Croc?  Isn’t he sort of a pained, tragic character?  Or what about Katana, crying at her sword-imprisoned-husband before battle?  Oooh ooh or how about Flagg? Then we could have another stupid moment where we find out how much the team respected him or some shit.  Really, I just wish someone had gotten the axe because right then, right there, on that day, Enchantress (or her bro) got the better of them.
Suicide Squad is full of logic holes and blatantly pathetic writing.  It’s one of those films where I want it to be better than it is, but if I’m honest with myself I know it just can’t get there.  This might be one of the coolest concepts so far in either the MCU or DCEU, and it’s a shame it couldn’t be any more fun and original than it was.  This is a movie that really needs a foundation to build off of, and the DCEU hasn’t yet laid any of the necessary groundwork.  And like BvS, we get odd little clues to a universe as-yet-to-be-revealed to us, such as during Harley’s intro where we’re flat out told that Robin has been murdered, presumably by the Joker, with Harley as an accomplice.  DC!  Why you do this!?  You could make a fantastic, poignant, widely discussed film where Robin freakin’ dies!!!  Will we get that?  Who the hell knows.  But even if we do, the surprise is already ruined, because we know that at some point, in this universe, at least one iteration of Robin dies.  See what I mean about DC blowing their load too early?
I think - assuming DC was just hell-fucking-bent on an ensemble “assemble” flick - they should’ve given us the Teen Titans.  I know the Titans have some unfamiliar faces, but not any worse than the Suicide Squad I would think.  Anyway, a Teen Titans movie would've been a great intro to Robin (wherever the hell he fits in...), and since the other members are a little more unfamiliar, the movie could’ve simply introduced them without the audience feeling like complicated backstories full of exposition via flashbacks were necessary.  It would also introduce us to Cyborg, which can only be a good thing going into the upcoming Justice League film without much information on anyone.  With a Teen Titans film in place, maybe DC would push the Justice League film back a couple of years (to keep from being repetitive) and in the meantime we could get proper standalone films for Batman, Flash, and Aquaman, as well as perhaps a proper follow-up to BvS (all in addition to the upcoming scheduled Wonder Woman movie).  These films could’ve also introduced - at the very least - Deadshot, Harley (and Mr. J), and Captain Boomerang (and at the most Katana and Croc as well), which would then provide an appropriate segue into a Suicide Squad film!  Ta-da!  Ain’t that plan grand?
Ahh...now we get to this part.  I think most Batman fans and cinephiles alike were just holding their breath until the inevitable next Joker.  Ok, maybe it wasn’t as urgent as actual breath-holding, but damn near everyone was blown away by Ledger’s performance and they knew that one day, sooner or later, someone else would don the white face paint.  Whether you creamed your pants over Ledger’s version of the Joker is pretty much irrelevant at this point - the point is that Ledger’s Joker has become the de facto standard for the character, almost instantaneously influencing the Joker’s portrayal in video games, comics, cartoons / animated features, and beyond.  Ledger took the character from “weird clown guy” to a dark and dirty place, filled with chaos and mystery.  And whether or not the next Joker would be “better” or “worse” than Ledger, one thing was for sure: it was going to be different.
And lo, Jared Leto, who you might remember from Requiem for a Dream or My So-Called Life or maybe even the crazy-ass Mr. Nobody (or the band 30 Seconds to Mars), ended up with the green hair and purple suit. [Sighs]  I don’t know what I think of this version, and I’ll tell you why.  First of all, it’s difficult to label him as an essential piece of Suicide Squad, and a big character like this hanging around on the outskirts leaves the audience feeling one of two ways: a) we should be seeing a lot more of him, or b) why the hell is here in the first place?  More often than not I find myself leaning towards Option B.  It doesn’t really have anything to do with the performance; rather, it has to do with his scenes feeling forced into a movie just so the movie can say, “look, it’s the Joker!”  On some level I get that we “needed” Harley’s backstory, but on the other hand, we weren’t treated to the same level of backstory when it came to Deadshot or K.C. or Captain fucking Boomerang.  
The other fundamental with Leto’s Joker as he exists right this moment is that he has virtually no connection with Batman.  The whole point of the Joker is to act as the antithesis to Batman - Batman is the hero who looks like a villain, Joker is the villain who looks, at the very least, like an innocent clown (I know, not really, but if we weren’t so heavily inundated with Joker’s appearance, the connection between “clown” and “innocence” would be more obvious) - Batman is meticulous and methodical and exacting, the Joker is reckless, wild, and impulsive - and then what really worries Batman is that part of him likes beating the shit out of bad guys, and part of him knows that “Bruce Wayne” is the real mask, and he sees those aspects of himself in the Joker, and it’s immensely threatening for him to think of himself as so close to a line that he considers the Joker to have already crossed.  Alright that was long-winded and poorly structured but the point is that Batman and Joker are peas in a pod, and it’s difficult to enjoy / understand the Joker without viewing it through his conflict with Batman.  I’m not saying it’s impossible, but I am saying that we need to be properly introduced to the Joker via Batman before we start trying to follow Joker sans Batman.
And last but not least we move on to Leto’s actual portrayal and interpretation of the Joker.  From what I’ve seen so far, I have some really mixed feelings about it.  Remember the conversation in Tropic Thunder about “going full retard?”  If not, go YouTube it and watch the scene - it’s a quick scene where one actor explains to another that he’s never going to win an Oscar by “going full retard” and then uses examples from actual cinema, his advice ultimately being that, even when playing a “retarded person,” you can’t go “full retard.”  My explanation is not a substitute; go watch the scene!  Replace “retard” with “crazy” and you’re approaching what I think about Leto’s Joker.  So far, it feels like Leto is going “full crazy” which just ain’t gonna work.  We’ve got to have something to latch onto besides all out batshit crazy (pun intended).  For instance Ledger’s Joker was devious and, whether he was completely conscious of it or not, he had an excellent understanding of human emotion and behavior.  Need proof?  How about his manipulation of others with his ever-changing and equally disturbing “origin” stories?  Or forcing Batman to choose between Rachel and Dent?  Or switching the detonators on the boats?  Or his little pep-talk with Dent where Two-Face was basically birthed?  In some ways he’s got that whole “insane-genius” thing going on...but I’m really, really not seeing that spark of “genius,” however heinous and depraved as it may be, in Leto’s iteration of the character.
I will reserve full judgement until we’re able to see more of the character, but so far it just seems like we’re getting Leto’s personal version of “weird” and while distinctive and memorable, I’m not sure if it’s enough to carry this version of the character to greatness.  Another point of contention is the new Joker’s apparent penchant for stereotypically gang-like activities.  I mean he’s hanging out in the club, all blinged out, driving the (alleged) Lambo...for all intents and purposes he’s a street thug.  Maybe a totally bizarre street thug, but still a street thug.  Maybe this approach could’ve worked prior to Ledger’s Joker but now...well now I think the audience expects more, much more.  Having a materialistic and vain Joker just doesn’t feel right nowadays.  Granted Suicide Squad doesn’t show us much and there could be several other explanations behind the club scene besides the Joker acting as some sort of Godfather (which is kinda what it looks like), but it’s still hard to imagine our current Joker looking like part of a hip-hop entourage while our previous Joker burns gigantic piles of money.
Man, ok, I know I flew the hell off topic there with Suicide Squad...I guess I had more to say about it than I thought.  Like I said though, I want so badly for it to be a better movie than it really is.
I guess by pointing out all these issues with Suicide Squad I’ve by default discussed why and how the DCEU is so far behind the MCU.  To sort of start wrapping things up here, I think DCEU is in a lot of trouble.  While I can 100% appreciate the ambition behind all 3 of their in-universe films, they’re full of systemic issues that Marvel has gotten around by simply taking their time and building something from the ground up.  DC seems to be doing too much from the top down, and I fear that the upcoming Justice League movie will be just as problematic; sure, we’ll know Wonder Woman better by then, but we still won’t know much more about Batman or Superman and we’ll have at least 3 other characters to juggle for the first time (Cyborg, Aquaman, Flash) if not more.
If you’ve read this far, then I’m positive you’re aware that both Marvel and DC have a lot of TV shows on the air as well as many others planned.  Marvel has smartly decided that their TV shows will also take place in the MCU.  This is great - it leaves the door wide open...if each and everything little thing doesn’t connect, that’s ok, because that’s how universes work.  However, if the situation permits, they’ve got an assload of material to work with should they choose to do something epic and massively rewarding for fans.  DC, well, DC is just being a dumbass about it all.  They’ve got lots of shows - Gotham, Supergirl, Arrow, Flash, probably more on the way (something based around the “Birds of Prey” I think?  or is that already a thing...?).  DC has a perfect, golden opportunity to play catch-up within this medium, but what do the do?  Drop the fucking ball.  They’ve said conclusively that the TV shows do not take place in the same universe as the films; furthermore, they seem to be on the fence or downright confused as to whether or not all of the TV shows are happening in the same universe.  If I remember correctly, there was some sort of Flash / Supergirl crossover but instead of treating it as a full-fledged crossover, the pulled some comic book trickery and said some shit about one show existing within “Earth-2,” implying that the visiting show was outside the “normal” continuity of the home show.  How fucked up is that?  And why?  Wouldn’t it actually be easier to sit down and work out the connections from the beginning rather than doing what the fuck ever year after year and completely destroying what could be a built in fan base for all DC-related / inspired media...?
As painful as it is to watch DC dig this hole, I’m equally interested in how the MCU is going to grow and evolve in the next couple of years, particularly as this “first generation” of heroes gives way to a new group.  Now in a comic book the writers can keep on cranking out Iron Man stories one after the other for years on end, but somehow I don’t think the MCU will work out this way.  The simple fact is that we’re not going to be following Iron Man and Cap and Thor and Hulk and whoever else indefinitely.  Maybe one of these days these sorts of franchises will become so incredibly lucrative that these companies will “breed” and groom actors to play a certain role indefinitely, but I think I can comfortably assert that reasonably well known actors like Downey Jr. and Evans and Hemsworth and Jackson don’t want to be associated with these characters for the rest of their careers.  I’m sure the paycheck is nice, but from an artistic perspective, these guys and gals are going to want to move on at some point, whether it’s 3 or 9 or 16 movies down the road.  
I sincerely hope the MCU can keep the momentum going but I do have some doubts...after all, our A-team (both actors and heroes) of Iron Man, Thor, Cap, and Hulk got knocked back a few notches between Age of Ultron and Civil War - compare the previous cast the the “new” team of Avengers: Cap, Vision, Scarlet Witch, and Falcon.  
I guess you can count Hawkeye and Black Widow in there somewhere, but honestly, I’ve got 3 words for those 2 characters: dead fucking weight. ��And really, Johansson is way too damn hot to be thrown in the background set on “dual-wield” while Hulk runs up buildings and Thor obliterates giant bio-organic floating skeleton creatures with a hammer and Stark whizzes around popping off plasma bolts and Cap sets his shield to physics = null.  C’mon Marvel, she’s freakin' gorgeous and all you can do is put her in dumb scenes with the Hulk, who is easily the least interesting Avenger outside of battle.
I digress.  For the record Margot Robbie was insanely hot in Suicide Squad - 50% of that is just ‘cause she’s a good looking chick, but the other 50% that really sets my loins aflame is the whole kinderwhore-inspired look.  (For the record, she also played Jordan Belford’s (Leo DiCaprio) wife in Wolf of Wall Street and she was pretty damn hot there as well (I didn’t know that was her until I specifically looked up what else she’d been in)...but the kinderwhore-ish look just pushed her into a whole other realm of fucking sexy.)  But then of course you get into that whole “2-kinds-of-hot” thing...Robbie, Suicide Squad version, is hot in that, “agh I want to fuck that right now” sort of way, whereas Johansson - although most absolutely definitely fuckable - also has that sort of classic beauty about her.  In addition to being very sexually attractive, she’s just pleasant to look at.  A chick can definitely be of the former variety without possessing qualities of the latter, but I’m not sure I can think of any time where the latter doesn’t also possess the sex appeal aspect...it may not be as urgent or immediate, but it’s still there.
Still digressing.  Most of this post is one big digression.  I apologize and applaud anyone who’s made it this far.
Let’s finish this up, shall we?  I’ve been writing this for days upon days and I got other cool toy shit I want to hurry up and write about before I forget it.
In summation, I will continue to keep faith in the DCEU, at least for another couple years worth of movies.  I like what Marvel is doing and I think they’ve landed on a workable formula, the problem is that I’m just not tripping over myself to see films about Ant-Man or Doctor Strange or even guys like Iron Man and Thor, simply because I’ve never really been that interested in them.  I mean I guess it depends on who you are and what you were exposed to, but as a kid I was interested in other heroes and really, even the big shots like Iron Man, were more or less just characters I knew of in passing.  Perhaps the MCU isn’t doing enough to make these characters interesting - perhaps these characters just don’t have the same built-in appeal as Spider-Man or Batman, etc.
When these MCU films start dropping in price and I can start loading up on 3 - 5 movies for $7.50 - $12 at Walmart, I'll be glad to give them a fair shake in the comfort of my living room, but as long as we’re at $20 a pop I’m sorry, I just don’t have $20 worth of give-a-damn when it comes to the Winter Soldier (holy shit a metal arm (I know, I know, everyone says it’s a great friggin’ movie)) or damn Ant-Man (I know I know, everyone says it’s a great friggin’ movie).  And in my defense, there were lots of really, really crappy superhero movies that came beforehand.
Bottom line:  DC, I love your characters, but you need to get your shit together.  Take it slow.  You don’t have to one-up the MCU just yet, and you’re on the road to potentially ruining what may be the greatest hero of our times, Batman.  And please, do something about your godawful TV situation.  To Marvel: I think you’ve got a lot of stuff figured out, but I think your entire universe would benefit from injecting a little more dirt and grime into your films.  They’re a little too light and a little too popcorn friendly.  Don’t go down DC’s road and make incomprehensible crap that masquerades as complexity - don’t do that shit - but man, let’s get a film with some gravitas, with some balls.
So, what in the hell do you think about the quality of the Marvel Cinematic Universe versus the DC Extended Universe?  Lay it on me!  Did I nail it down pretty good or am I way off base?  Should I keep my mouth shut until I’ve dredged through the whole of the MCU...?  Is Ant-Man really that fucking good?  Was the tie in with Winter Soldier and Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. really as brilliant as the rest of the internet seems to believe?  And while we’re at it, is anything in the DC TV-verse (what the fuck do we call it?) worth watching, or am I in the clear by being as dismissive as everyone else?  Tell me tell me tell me!
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