#this was harder to revise than i'd expected

[pencap]

my broken heart, i know that it is nothing short of a miracle that i can hold warmth into your bones when you wake shaking that i can kiss air into your lungs when you cannot breathe for screaming that i can curl a smile into your lips when you are worn from crying.

but my broken heart, i pray that somewhere in the vast unending stretch of worlds there is still a version of you that does not know the taste of gunmetal and still a version of me that does not know the sound of breaking bone and still a version of us that does not know the feeling of tragedy.

my broken heart, i hope in that world we taste happines that isn't tinged with iron and rust. in that world we speak legends that do not carry our names within them. in that world we blush pink with blood that isn't choked with ice chips and frost.

my broken heart, i promise even if in that world i do not get to hold you when you wake and i do not get to kiss you when you breathe and i do not get to make you smile when you cry

i would let you go, my broken heart so that you may be whole again.

- by sylvie (j.p.)

#spilled ink #poems on tumblr #poets on tumblr #writers on tumblr #writeblr #poetics #BACK IN MY DAY #when we used to make quote posts and have little tag lines for poems #this one was #'i'd pay in misery a thousand times over to buy you peace' #it did not fit in the revisions but i like it enough i wanted to mention it #this was harder to revise than i'd expected #gunmetal and ice chips these are familiar metaphors #pencap drafts

[richmondsims]

It was only a dog, Kyle told himself. It wasn't like he'd lost a family member or something... and yet...

He knew it probably hit harder because Baron had belonged to his father, one more link between them gone from the world. 

But it was more than that. The old dog had been a family member, at least to Kyle. 

Big loss that it was, his passing wasn't unexpected... Baron had been old even when he'd joined the household five years earlier. He'd been an unplanned addition, soon after Kyle's father had died. Willow hadn't been completely happy with the idea, especially as she already had a cat.

But in the end, even that hadn't been a problem.

Like Marie the cat, Willow had eventually, grudgingly, came to accept Baron - despite the fact that he was loud and largely untrained and, at his age, apparently untrainable. 

Kyle's daily walks would be a lot lonelier now.

It hadn't helped that Baron wasn't the only link to his father that Kyle had lost in the past year. It had been a huge shock when their landlord told Kyle and Cory that they were going to have to terminate the lease on the bookstore. The old building no longer met standards and it was going to need major work to make it compliant.

There was no one to blame - the landlord did all the expected maintenance and the shop looked tidy and sound to the untrained eye, but building standards were changed and revised all the time. And the landlord had gone out of his way to help them find a new building to move to.

The new shop was spacious and modern and nothing like the one they were leaving behind.

And, it was a lot better. Even Kyle had to admit that. 

The other building had been fine when they were small and starting out. But the shop was popular now, and it had been cramped and almost unmanageable in the old building during busy times.

It was another link to the past lost, but letting it go wasn't as hard as Kyle had expected it to be. A new beginning might be a good thing after all. Who knows, maybe even his father would have been looking for a bigger building, when their customer numbers grew.

And they kept some traditions alive - Willow was the first customer in the new shop, just as she had been in the old one.

From Kyle - Part 2

I am genuinely sad to see that dog gone from the game - partly because I'm writing this in the wake of losing my r/l 19 year old cat so it hits hard, but also because Baron really made himself a part of my hood. More than once I'd see Kyle walking him on a community lot while I was playing another family (that's where all the pictures of Kyle walking the dog come from). He also seems to have found his way into the background of most of the pictures I have of this household. I really notice his absence when I play the house.

#richmondsims #ts3 #the sims 3 #sims 3 story

[muzzlemouths]

I wanted to ask Every Question but I narrowed it down to 5!! :D

🪄 what is your post-writing/sharing aftercare? How do you take care of yourself or celebrate yourself when you've finished a fic?

💝 what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

✨ What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

🎀 give yourself a compliment about your own writing

💌 share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

🪄 what is your post-writing/sharing aftercare? How do you take care of yourself or celebrate yourself when you've finished a fic?

💝 what is a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

One of the first fics I posted here! Returning the Favor was originally just something simple I wrote up on a lighthearted bet from @doofnoof yet is somehow my most shared fic to this day. I've been meaning to write a follow-up chapter with Sun (it's already started) but I'm not sure when it'll get finished. Ironically, Sun is a much harder character to crack when it comes to comfort.

✨ What's a fic you've posted you wish you could breathe life into again and have people talking about it? (or simply a fic you wish got more credit)

Definitely It's Curtains for You! It's a little rough around the edges and was left to gather dust because it's my only fic (currently) involving the Glamrocks, and I'm worried about getting their characterization right.

I feel like this story always slips between the cracks compared to my other fics because it's not an out-of-the-ordinary au in the same way Dead Mall Dare is, and maybe it's not as interesting because of that...idk. I'm more upset with myself over losing faith in it than the actual lack of fans for the story. I was its very first fan, after all, I ought to be putting in the work to show it!

It still holds a dear place in my heart and I do plan to complete it one day, but it may go through some revisions before that happens.

🎀 give yourself a compliment about your own writing

Ooooh. errrrr. 😬 mm. I think I'm decent at writing emotions? - at least when it comes to angst or comfort, which is what I consider my specialty. I used to really struggle with descriptions, especially scenery, but I think I'm getting the hang of it now.

💌 share something with us about an up-and-coming work (WIP) that has you excited!

The next Lost in Transmission (VHS au) chapter gives you a better look at Eclipse - that is, how they appear when put under stress, a harsh comparison to the small and subdued appearance they have now. It's a reveal that's happening sooner than I'd originally planned, but I'm pretty excited to show it off.

Then in the next chapter of Dead Mall Dare you get to learn more about Moon's situation, some lore involving the mall itself (and some hints about what happened on that Fateful Day so many years ago), and even a scene involving a high-stakes chase and some mall parkour. I'm plenty excited about that, too!

Thank you for the questions!! :D

#ask games #this one was BEEFY sorry I talk so much lol

[skypied]

AO3 Wrapped Questions!

3, 5, 6, 7, 10, 11, 16, 20, 27, 28, 29, 30 :)

I'm guessing wrapped implies "works from this year" so I'm only going off those! Buckle uuuuup this is getting looooong like always

3. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)?

Hmmm, maybe Back Home. Most of my fics this year feel like mindless brain dumps, but this feels more like a complete work.

5. What work of yours got more feedback than you expected?

Probably hard feelings? It generally has a lot less hits and kudos than most my other work, probably because of it being angst without a happy ending (YET), but through the months it's gotten a lot of very sweet and heartfelt and/or heartbreaking comments.

Back Home also got a lot more feedback than expected - it was one of those venting fics that I didn't really expect to resonate and/or not be enjoyed by anyone else but me.

6. Favorite title you used

Hmmmmmmmm , I don't really think any of my titles this year stand out :p Maybe Catch of the Day, just bc it's so stupid.

7. If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most?

Most my titles from this year weren't song titles actually! Surprising, since I used to exclusively use song lyrics. There's only hard feelings (Lorde) and Can't Help It, I'm Obsessed (Sam Riggs).

(In 2021 we had Orla Gartland, Lizzo, Troye Sivan, Taylor Swift, Halsey and Maria Mena. Taylor and Maria were used twice: so they win. I think Maria would win overall for how many times her lyrics have been direct inspiration.)

10. What work was the quickest to write?

Probably a tie between the first chapter of hard feelings (started at like 10 in the morning when I was supposed to work, lol) - and Home (written while perched on the kitchen counter watching onions caramellize for onion soup). Both were around four hours, maybe one or two more for revisions.

Wait, actually, both chapters of Catch of the Day were mostly written in an hour or two each.

11. What work took you the longest to write?

Depends on whether you count hours spent on it, or stretch of time it took to finish it haha.

I do have wips I started last summer. Most of them are probably never gonna be anything. But I do have a wip that's almost done and I still intend to finish that I began... 14 months ago. oops.

But among published work - the ones that took the longest stretch of time is probably undertow and chapter two of hard feelings. According to docs, I began undertow on Christmas Eve last year (damn, didn't I have anything better to do?), so it tooooook... almost nine months? It's also kind of a mashup between three aimless wips that I eventually figured out went well enough to just patch together. hard feelings part two took seven months.

Most hours spent on it is harder to gauge, but maybe Can't Help It, I'm Obsessed. I remember I spent most my free time on it for maybe two-three weeks. (And then Annie kindly and graciously and perfectly finished it for me, thank god; I'd gotten myself in a real rut with it.)

16. What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag?

Oh I dunno. Most are generic things like genre, established relationship and aged-up characters. The only one that sticks out is probably Alberto Scorfano has ADHD.

20. Which work of yours have you reread the most?

Prrrroooobably Trust Fall! I think it's just sweet and neat.

27. What do you listen to while writing?

That goes in cycles. Sometimes a playlist with classical music mixed in with movie soundtracks. Sometimes just whatever album I'm hooked on at the moment. I have some specific music for specific things, most are one song I'll loop for hours:

Downtown (feat Pri Pach) by BYOR, VINNE, Pri Pach. It's SO good for hyperfixating and writing smut 2am on a weekday. (Been a while since I did that, though.) There’s a reason it was my #1 on Spotify Wrapped last year, and #2 this year.

IDFC (feat. Ravenna Golden) by WHIPPED CREAM, Perto, Ravenna Golden. Same as Downtown. It tingles my brain.

River by Bishop Briggs. Great for emotionally charged and angsty smut.

I've spent HOOOOOURS listening to just 22:12 Until The End of Time from the Haven soundtrack while writing, no specific genre.

I generally listen a lot to Kevin Atwater to get into those Sad Boy Feelings (especially when writing about Alberto being too brainwashed by Christianity to admit his feelings for Luca. God I still love that AU, shame it's never getting finished.)

Lately I've been rewatching TV shows while writing, just to have something moving on the screen and something to listen to.

28. Favorite work you wrote this year?

Hmm hmm hmmmmm, feel like I'm repeating myself here but Back Home and hard feelings. Both feel like is the first complete stories I wrote. Most my stuff is just scenes, this was the first that spanned over a longer time and connected themes together.

29. Favorite line/passage you wrote this year?

Ahhh idk if I have the patience to reread all 50k I published this year, so I'm taking a couple that come to mind:

It’s stupid and predictable and sometimes Luca wonders when they’ll tire of this, when the intensity of the teenage crush will fade into something more mature, as his mother used to sigh when they were chasing each other’s tails around the bay. It’s been years, and he’s starting to suspect this is just what they’re like, perpetually snickering like kids breaking curfew, whispering secrets in a blanket fort and constantly one-upping each other. 

from Morning Routines. The whole fic is stupid, silly fun, but I feel like this passage sums up their relationship in a cute way.

You know him like the back of your hand, but he’s scarily good at slipping under your skin to hide. You convince yourself otherwise, but you can never really tell. Not really. But it’s yet another trust you have to fall into, accept the rush of gravity and hope he catches you. 

Trust Fall, chapter one

He looks at you, breathless and disbelieving. Disbelieving your love for him. When it’s the only thing you truly believe in, when nothing in this chaotic world makes sense without him, when it’s the seam keeping your life stitched together.  

You wish he could reach inside your chest, clench your heart tight and feel that it’s more his than your own. You wish you could put your mouth to his ear like a conch shell, and he’d hear the ceaseless waves that lap in the back of your mind whispering his name. You wish he could feel the magnetic pull from somewhere deep in your guts that makes you unable to stop orbiting him. 

You don’t dare imagine what would happen if he stopped letting you love him. 

Trust fall, chapter two

Both of these from Trust Fall are some of the rare instances that I feel like I’ve written analogies that feel complete and make sense for them and the work itself. 

You stare up like you used to, towards the incomprehensible lights of celestial bodies dancing on the surface, towards the never-ending fantasies of freedom forever pulling you towards the next horizon. Except now there is an anchor wrapped up in your tail, with a low, humming purr filling your body and quieting the restless whisper in the undercurrent of your blood and gentle claws tracing patterns over your ribs, all brazen ferociousness gone for listless limbs and a sleepy murmur whenever you shift.

There’s still a pull, a need to see, try, explore more. But maybe you don’t need to leave everything behind to feel free. 

from undertow. I feel like this is the closest I’ll come to writing something about Luca’s “teenage rebellion” need for freedom that might lead him to neglect friendships/relationships for fear of being smothered again, and becoming comfortable with intimacy and vulnerability and being tied down.

Also this line:

You don’t want him to be in love with you unless it hurts.

This whole thing from ch2 of Back Home:

“Do you still love me?” you ask again, but now your breath is slow and calm because you know the answer. But you have to ask. Just in case. 

You know the answer because he’s ripped your heart out and sown it back together; replaced old, festering scabs with gossamer threads of promises and gently placed it back inside. It’s still a fragile, ugly patchwork, but he’ll keep replacing bits and pieces of old hurt with new hope until it’s whole. You know it because he has scratch marks and bruises down his back and neck colored by your love and rage, because he lets you ruin him to save yourself.

You know it because you believe him more than you believe yourself.

“More than anything,” he says in a firm voice, as if it’s a fact as natural and definite as the sun rising and setting. He picks the smoldering stardust off the floor, breathes life back into the stars and places them back into your eyes. He smothers the flaming rage in your veins and replaces your blood with love. Because he loves you. You love him too. You love him more than anything and it hurts more than anything. But it’s worth it for the blissful, warm silence when he looks at you and you know he’s seen everything inside you and still he wants to. He makes your heart into a home and you let him. No matter how many times you tear it down in all-consuming fits of rage, he puts it back in order and you let him. He wants to make you better and you want to let him.

yayyy I love breaking Alberto and putting him back together again<3

30. Biggest surprise while writing this year?

Maybe how drastic the shift from only writing smut to never writing smut was? haha. Dgmw, I still write smut, but I just... don't finish it. Idk, it always ends up pushing up against things I'm uncomfortable with, or I write myself into corners. I feel like they're always things that aren't really a big deal, but they turn into massive hurdles in my head. And while writing smut is fun, I eventually end up feeling like I'm just writing the same things over and over. Which, y'know, is still fun and doesn't mean it's not valuable! I guess I just get really self-conscious over baring my ass on the internet.

On a more positive note, I think I've managed to keep a bit more distance to my writing. I do often get stuck with writing, and that frustration used to encompass everything and be... not great for me mentally. I used to obsess a lot more about feedback and get really bummed out about "underperforming" works and compare myself a lot to others. Now it's more like... I just chuck stuff I think is neat up on AO3 and don't think much more of it.

I’ve also experimented a lot more with style than I expected, and I guess found my voice a bit more!

ALSO how much Luca POV I’ve written. I still feel like I don’t understand the guy, but he’s fun to write. Alberto POV tends to become ... dark, lol.

#skypieposts #ty for asking! <3 #as always i ramble!

[rascalnikov]

don’t know how to feel about a ‘i don’t think your exam results are an accurate reflection of your abilities’ email 

#like i was fully expecting this because i did not work for them AT ALL #because i was in a depressive episode when i should have been revising #but now i've moved past it it's so hard for me to be sympathetic to my past self #now i'm just like bitch why didn't u just do the fucking work #and i do regret not trying harder #but i know it's easy for me to say that now #and i feel guilty because i'm at this amazing university but i'm just wasting it #like someone who works harder should have got my place #but anyway yeah so like on the one hand #it's comforting because my tutor is nice and the email is saying that she knows i can do better #which means my real exams should be fine as long as i work #but i still feel like i let her down and i know she'll be disappointed #and this will be a blemish on my record in any case #even if i do better in my real exams #and even though i always knew my results would be bad #it's harder than i thought it would be coping with the fact my results are out there now and they're bad #and they're permanent #and i'm getting stressed about finding them out even though ?? i always knew they'd be shit?? #and i'd come to terms with that ?? #anyway tbh i feel better having written out all that #i guess i just wanted to sort out the conflict of 'i knew they'd be bad but i still can't help wishing they weren't' #but like. it is what it is. #just gotta get organised for the real thing #thanks 2 anyone who read that #text

[yvesdot]

yves.’S 2021 YEAR IN REVIEW

(2018) (2019) (2020)

(view the image in highest quality here!)

A look at something I wrote every month in 2021. All of the above excerpts can be read in order at this link, and I've included a few notes below on the pieces and months in question. It feels as though I spent so much of my time writing for Patreon and editing Forest Castles and so on, but there was still a lot of fresh content every single month!

JANUARY - In Her Arms (unpublished)

COVID's been pretty bad, hasn't it? I think it's been pretty bad. Wrote this piece almost a year ago now to deal with it, and have workshopped it several times since. Eventually I'll get a version I'm happy with, and then you'll see it published!

FEBRUARY - KAY Valentine's Drabble 2 (read online)

I made sure to come up with something to post for Valentine's Day 2021-- a cute little moment between Kay/Atlas, and then Constantine/Julia. Still warms my heart to read over this... that transphobic dad of Kay's isn't always completely useless!

MARCH - mortālēs (unpublished)

I've had a lot of ideas for erotica this year (all excerpts here are SFW!) but haven't managed to post them yet-- I'd probably put them on a separate NSFW writing blog, as I've mentioned before. Well, here's one, inspired by my sudden apparent interest in historical m/f.

APRIL - Silvia (unpublished)

While in the car on the way to a more wintry setting, I listened through the entire Miike Snow self-titled album, and was struck by a sudden intrigue caused by this song. Here was something out of the box, intense, explosive in its unrequited emotion. I could see it all playing out in my head, so clearly I knew I was coming up with a 'true' narrative totally disconnected from the original... but, no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't set it to paper. I'm going to let it percolate.

MAY - Forest Castles (first two chapters)

Again, I did edit FC year-round, so I only displayed it here in months where I honestly couldn't find any other new writing (probably hiding in the depths of my Drive.) This was a fun scene to write, though who knows if it'll survive later cuts.

JUNE - THE LOVER RISES FROM THE ABYSS・恋人が黄泉から生えてくる (read online)

I wrote this flash piece in either early June or late May, and then I was stuck revising it for quite a while. You can read about the process of that on Patreon! I worried over it until I felt it couldn't be worried over one second more... and then I edited it as I posted it on Tumblr ^__^

JULY - Something Weird I Heard About Rebecca (available in BLOOD&BREATH zine)

I wrote this so long ago! And, honestly, I expected to spend even longer editing and submitting it, but when the Blood & Breath submission form came around, I knew it was perfect. Preorder the LGBT vampire zine before January 5th to read the story in beautiful, physical form!

AUGUST - Forest Castles (first two chapters)

Day One Hundred And Seventeen Billion: Eliza Is Still Stuck In White Castle. To be fair, though, I remember when I thought I'd never reach White Castle! I hit quite a block around here, which I am still unsnarling, and I like that I've chosen to lean much harder into Eliza's princess nature.

SEPTEMBER - WTWBingo drabbles (read online)

Oh, God, what a timesuck! In addition to The Death of The Author (more shortly), in joining the WTWBingo event, I found myself tormented by hundreds of ideas for drabbles! Thanks so much to the WTW folks for inspiring me to write 10,000 words of these stories.

OCTOBER - The Death of the Author (read online)

I love Halloween. I love Halloween writing, and I love Halloween Episodes. More than all of that, though, I love murder mysteries, and so I am thrilled to present to you, with no further context whatsoever, The Death of the Author.

NOVEMBER - The Proposal (unpublished)

More erotica, with an eerie amount of people waiting on it. Very, very simple romcom MILF nonsense, which apparently is not only a thing I can write but something other people might want to read. I absolutely loved this piece, and it was responsible for my incredible 8K start on Day One of NaNo.

DECEMBER - Exhaustively (read online)

Exhaustively's had a big edit, and I'm now formatting it to release in limited edition paperbacks, in honor of beloved Archivist Max @goose-books! I highly recommend taking a look at it in this graphic (instead of just in the transcribed version) for full formatting joy. Also, I wrote 10,000 words in a day... but that didn't make it in here.

Man, was I prolific this year! I really enjoyed my writing, and I explored all sorts of artistic nooks and crannies (as Patrons especially will appreciate, what with all the experiments and behind-the-scenes things posted to Patreon this year. Fun Patreon surprise coming for free shortly...)

I also spent a lot of time on non-writing writing things, such Exhaustively's formatting, and, well, this Year in Review! I tried to show myself how much of my work wasn't just sitting and writing but reading and thinking and promoting and posting, and I think it worked... though I do miss just-plain-writing this week, as I wrap up all these New Yearly loose ends.

This upcoming year, I want to work more steadily on Forest Castles. It's hard to fit in with all my other priorities, especially when I don't have too much time to write a day. Do I need to set aside an amount of time daily to get it done, or is it better to dedicate full days? That's something I am still exploring.

Finally, this year I began using 4thewords, and I quite like it! Makes writing addictive and much more naturally fun. If you'd like to join up, feel free to DM me any questions, and my referral code is LOMDY47116.

And please, if you feel inspired by this post, make your own! That links to my template, which shouldn't be too painful to use. Just hop in there and change my name to yours, and tag me when you're done so that I can see it!

As always, you can read all of my posted writing here, and if you’d like to support me, I have both a ko-fi for one-time donations and a Patreon for exclusive monthly content. Thanks for being here this year! It's been a big one for so many reasons, and I'm so grateful to have had you along. Have a wonderful 2022, and I'll see you then.

#wtwcommunity #writeblr #year in review #writers on tumblr #writeblr community #writeblr meme #writeblr game #tag game #(Though I'm not tagging people because as always IF YOU WANT TO YOU SHOULD JUST DO IT!) #txt #i have to say the first and most important thing to me is whether i like how it sounds... #2021 #year in review 2021 #summary of art #summary of writing #year in writing #excerpts #writing meme #writing game #important writing updates

[studyjournalblr]

this is a semi rant, feel free to delete if ur uncomfortable

I'm in icse 10th grade, sem1 results were very very bad it was only 85% and i really expected 90 atleast. these were mcqs and I had studied super duper hard for these exams.

sem 2 are even harder and I need atleast 95 (so 37/40 in most subjects and 40 in atleast 3 subjects) but exams are on 25th April, my prelims are in 3 days and i couldn't do anything these past few days. ive only finished like 4 chapters and these exams have no leaves and God, I just... my anxiety is killing me, I don't know what to do..

i just wanna ask.. how do u motivate yourself? how do u stay focused and not get distracted...

First of all, I'd like to say: This is exactly what I (still) do before every exam. I waste my time. Panic a lot while wasting time. Complete very little over the huge chunk of time I had and end up with 70-80% of the portions still left. Most of the time, I haven't even done the first learning of the chapter: The day before the exam is the first time that I even read it.

I actually have severe focus problems, more than I let people see, but there are some things that I do to get things done.

I don't know about what you have in 10th grade ICSE, but from my 8 years in an ICSE School, I'm assuming that the large amount and detail does make it harder to keep track of everything. And not spreading your learning over a week or so before exams will account to losing out marks here and there because you haven't revised those points.

What I've been doing so far is basically prioritizing important portions and marking stuff that I feel would be asked. If it's too gruelling to read, either find a video (ik ICSE vids aren't as common as CBSE vids, but there are definitely gonna be some of them) or read it out aloud to listen to yourself.

Most importantly: do as many sample Question Papers as possible. Familiarize yourself with it's pattern. This is a Board Exam, so it's pattern is gonna be recurring, and once you know what type of questions are asked where and for how much, you'll be able to prioritize better. Eg: Question 7 is always a numerical from a chapter that you aren't good at. Learn how to solve those kind of questions. This will save you a lot of time you'd spend on revising less important things, and increase the probability of scoring marks.

Preparing according to the paper is like training in combat to fight one particular enemy, rather than just doing a bunch of exercises. You're spying on their moves by seeing the sample papers. And when you start covering it like that, it's easier to remain motivated and feel some movement and progress.

I've also recently found out that doing aesthetic notes and romanticising my work gets my ADHD brain to hyperfixate on the right stuff, so if that helps you get at least something done, then it's great! 👍👍 (it doesn't necessarily apply to everyone, so don't worry if this doesn't work for you)

Also, don't feel disheartened if you still procrastinate. It's not easy to get over it, so what you gotta do is work around it. Forgive yourself for what is happening, and face the fact that your brain works in a different way.

Sorry for replying a little late... and don't hesitate to ask me stuff!

I hope this helps you, and one more thing-

Note down/ log your preparation in the preps, compare it with the result and plan your board preparation. That's also gonna help.

#ask studyjournalblr #desi studyblr #studyblr #study journal #cbse #icse #anon #student #desi

[morimakesfanart]

Sindria's Prophet #16

[1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] [11] [12] [13] [14] [15]

[AO3]

~POV Sinbad~ Mori wasn't just a Prophet, she had immense knowledge of her own that was going to make Sindria untouchable. Sinbad was going to achieve his dream much sooner than he had ever imagined. Mori was special; intelligent, clever, capable, and she could read the waves of Fate. Was there any other woman as attractive? The unknown craving that had plagued him for the past week was placated. Delicious wine, beautiful women, delicious food -none of his normal pleasures had fulfilled whatever that feeling was, but for some reason this moment with the his Beautiful Prophet was. "And now you're *my* kind and generous King Sinbad, ... Right?" Mori's bashful confidence was always endearing, but hearing her call him 'my King' in person made something snap in him. They were in a corner and Mori is small; he could easily block view of her in case any of the magicians turned around. He wouldn't even have to lean that far to get a taste of her. "DO EITHER OF YOU Have an ounce of self awareness??” Ja'far popped the bubble that had formed around the two.

King Sinbad froze. Everyone in the room was watching them. Sinbad stood up straight. He shouldn't exactly continue his plans with an audience. He removed his hand from the window and crossed his arms. Yam was practically shaking the magician next to her. "I wasn't the only one to see it this time!” An older magician with a beard laughed and said something like 'to be young.' Another said something a long the lines of "So it's like that then." Ja'far was still grumbling about his King's behavior -he should know better by now, he promised he wouldn't, etc. but 1. Sinbad didn't do anything wrong, and 2. he said he knew what he was doing -he knew how to handle flirting with Mori; he never said anything about not flirting with her. "And you, Lady Prophet," Ja'far changed targets. 'Oh?' Sinbad didn't expect Mori to be reprimanded for his flirting -although, she did flirt back. Ja'far continued, "You said that you knew about Sin's habits so wouldn't fall for him or-" "AAAAAH" Yamuraiha yelled over the other General as she crossed the room as fast as she could, and clapped a hand over his mouth. She turned to the King and Prophet with wide eyes and a forced smile. "Your Majesty! Mori! Would you like to see the spell again with our new changes?!" She didn't let go of Ja'far. The group of magicians started supporting her suggestion with "Let us show you," "I'm sure we've got it this time," and reciting the changes to the formula. They were clearly trying to stop Ja'far from discouraging Mori. Sinbad had no idea why they suddenly decided to become his wingmen, but it was convenient for him since he planed to do more than flirt with her later. Mori walked up to the Generals, although she only addressed Yamuriaha. "Yes, please! Even if it's not perfect I'd like to see your progress!" She spoke with the same forced enthusiasm as Yam. Sinbad only got a glimpse before Mori's back was to him, but her face was definitely a brighter red than it had been a moment ago. She was getting better at flirting with him, but she couldn't hold her composure for long. The King laughed as the head magician practically body checked Ja'far out of her way and left him out of the group before they preformed the newly revised spell. This time it produced a mostly clear stone. It wasn't a high quality diamond, but they had done it. They would have to be careful with this though since it could lower the market value of whatever they make. As they figured out the specifics for every substance they needed, Sindria could become fully self sufficient -they would still deal in trade so as to not completely leave the rest of the world behind. It was amazing. His magicians were amazing for being able to figure this out in such a short time, and his Prophet was just as -if not even more- amazing for knowing all of this and being able to explain it to them. When the excitement around the magic spell died down they finally showed him the microscope. It was a prototype so they had to be gentle with it. Two pieces of glass with water squished between them were slid under and when Sinbad looked through the lenses he saw the strange small creatures that Mori had written about. Seeing them forced him to accept that what Mori wrote about 'germs' had to be true too -and those were even smaller than these things. Looking at those things squirming around and knowing they were everywhere made his skin crawl. The King stopped looking through the device. "They really are real." "Yup." Mori responded plainly. "And now that you all know and have proof. There's going to have to be a lot of changes. The way illnesses are handled is obvious, but there's going to have to be a lot more changes to how food and housing and things are handle to better maintain sanitary environments. I know a bunch of sanitation procedures so I can help there too." Ja'far was rubbing his temples. "This is going to be a logistical nightmare. Do you realize that we are going to have to fix all those things and get all Sindrians to understand without having it affect our production or

trade??" "It's not like we're doing this alone." Mori tried to comfort him. "We'll figure something out." The conversation moved to this new problem. His Beautiful Prophet really was something else. She had solutions to problems they didn't even know they had. Mori had a habit of using her hands whenever she talked -even more when she was excited. She was cute and deserved to know, but she was in the middle of helping his people so he would hold his tongue and just watch her. If Sinbad was honest, he had stopped listening to the conversation a while ago and was just looking for an opportunity to finally ask Mori -and Yam of course- if they would join him for dinner so he could get all of his Generals more aquatinted with her. Someone mentioned a specific scroll in one of the libraries. Before the whole group could drag Mori out of the room, King Sinbad raised a hand and got everyone's attention. "I know there's a lot to do, but I have some things to discuss with my Beautiful Prophet as well." Mori looked back at him. "What is it?” It seemed that nickname wasn't as affective as before -hopefully it was just the timing. "Is it something we can talk about here?” "I was thinking we could talk over dinner," Sinbad paused to see how she would respond to the implications. Mori's eyes widened and her shoulders tensed, and best of all that blush came back. "With all of my Generals, of course." Mori blushed harder realizing he was messing with her. Yam looked disappointed at first -his Generals cared way to much about him finding a wife- but then she looked content with being a part of the plan. "You might have met them, and know them from reading Fate but they still don't know you yet." He finished. Yam spoke first. "This is a great idea. Pisti was just telling me that she wanted to get to know Mori." Mori regained her composer. "I'd like to get to know everyone personally too, so I'm find with this." It was a roundabout way of saying 'yes.' Her blush was gone but she was still embarrassed. With that settled, Ja'far let Yam and Mori know when dinner would be ready. It was a little earlier than he normally ate but this would give them more time to mingle before they'd be completely out of sunlight. "Well then," the King turned to his Prophet, "since we have some time beforehand-" "OH no you don't!" Ja'far cut in. "You've already had a long enough break *and* you plan on ending early today? The least you can do is work your butt off until then." --- ~POV Mori~ The King was pushed out of the room by his right hand man. I had a mix of relief and longing watching him go. "You'll see his Majesty again soon." Yam had a sweet smile on her face, but I knew better than to trust it. All eyes were on me and they were no longer the eyes of academics; they were hungry for gossip. I was not ready to explain why shipping us was a bad idea. "So about that scroll you mentioned earlier..." I completely shifted conversation back to the eventual rebuilding effort and luckily one of them obliged me.

I was lead to one of the libraries and handed a few scrolls on the construction used in the country. I had read a little on ancient construction methods out of interest and some on modern methods since my uncle worked in the industry. I had a little bit of experience with construction when I worked at a community theater, but it wouldn't be anything the people here wouldn't know. That paired with these documents showing how magic was used in the process made what little I did know completely useless. 'Can't know everything I guess.' I turned my head up towards the ceiling. I wasn't sure how much time I had left and I decided to use it soaking up the ambience of the library. The smell of paper, the maze-esc layouts, the quiet feeling; it's like a gentle space separate from the rest of the world. The libraries of the Black Libra Tower also had huge windows to let in a ton of natural lighting. I was really going to enjoy working in this place. --- Yam and I ended up lost in conversation, so someone ended up being sent to bring us to the dinner. When we finally arrived and opened the doors to the dining hall my nose was filled with the smell of herbs and delicious food. This was my first meal that wasn't paired with bitter medicine. I might have been procrastinating subconsciously to avoid the medicine I was no longer taking. Everyone was already there chatting. The long table was covered with food, but I couldn't make out any of it from the door. King Sinbad was sitting at the head of the table at the other end of the room with a goblet in his hand. Yamuraiha started in ahead of me and called into the room. "I'm sorry we're so late! We were talking about magical proofs and," she rambled in her explanation. I heard a few comments of congrats for getting better and said "Thanks" reflexively more than consciously. As I got closer, I ignored the Generals at the table to look at the spread. There were a few different types of fish, meat of some kind, a bunch of vegetables, and bread. It brought tears to my eyes; It was so beautiful. The Imuchukk laughed at my obvious interest in the food. "What are you waiting for? There plenty for everyone." He was sitting closest to the door. I didn't look away from the food when I answered. "I'm small with a small stomach so I'm going to need to pace myself to be able to eat a little of everything. If I save the best for last like I normally do then I might not even get to eat it." That garnered laughs and comments. I ignored them; I was too busy weighing my options. As the guest of honor I was placed at the opposite end of the table from King Sinbad. Thank goodness, because I didn't think I could handle being super close to him all evening. Even with the direct line of sight, I had distance to protect me. Yam sat on the other side of Hina from me. Pisti was on my other side. Sharrkan was across from Yam. Spartos was between Yam and Ja'far. Drakon was across from Ja'far. And Masrur was between Drakon and Sharrkan.

I picked up my plate to get food. "Alright. I've decided to just grab my favorites. If I have room later then so be it!" I was used to being watched while I eat so their stares didn't bother me. I covered my plate in all of the types of fish and some vegetables. "I take it you like fish?" Sinbad asked while I was taking some of the fish that was on his end of the table. "It's my favorite!" I answered excitedly. I could tell as I placed the grilled fish on my plate that it was going to be heavenly. It was already flaking and letting the smell reach me faster. I couldn't wait to get back to my seat and took a bite of the fish. It melted in my mouth. I let out a squeak of approval as I grabbed another bite. After a moment Sinbad asked me another question. "What do you think of greasy foods?" It felt pointed. "I'll eat it if it's the only option, but I'm not a fan." The Generals made some comments that amounted to, "They have the same taste." I was too busy enjoying my food to think about what they were saying. Pisti asked me her own pointed question as I sat down. "Do you like alcohol?" They were comparing me to Sinbad. I suddenly remembered the Official Character Encyclopedia. According to it, Sinbad's favorite food was fish, his least favorite was greasy, and his favorite snacks were the types that paired well with alcohol. "I'm not a big drinker, but it's not like I dislike alcohol. I'm just allergic to sulfites." "Huh?" The group asked in unison. Time to explain one of my allergies again. "Sulfites are a very useful preservative so it was also added to a lot of foods back home including alcohol. All grape wines produce sulfites naturally. When I ingest about 2 shots of a drink that contains sulfites I will struggle to breathe for about an hour." As soon as the words were out of my mouth, the goblet of wine I didn't realize was in front of me was grabbed by Hinahoho. They all looked panicked at each other like they had just dodged a bullet. In an attempt to relieve the tension, Sinbad asked Yam to catch everyone up on the meeting from earlier. Yam started ranting about the progress we had made with the alchemy magic. While they focused on reclaiming the mood, I focused on the delicious food. I tried a root vegetable on my plate. It was a little earthy with a subtle sweetness. The seasoning added to the sweet, but also had a little spice similar to cracked pepper. It had been streamed so it wasn't crunchy. I was asked to repeated what I told Sin and Ja'far earlier about the tech of home, Their questions had me explain more about my world and many of the things I had done: volunteer work to get scholarships, marketing for some networking organizations and some other companies, an assistant and teacher in out of school programs for 6 years while also working at a theater to pay for my own education. I only mentioned some of the places I had traveled to. I didn't even get to the things I did as hobbies or in working toward my dream of being a full time writer&artist. "I'm surprised by how much you say you've done." Drakon commented. I had heard similar before when talking about my past. "Is it really that shocking? Considering my age, I think it makes sense for me to have done a bit." It's more shocking that I was doing all that while getting so sick from my chronic illnesses that I would be fully bedridden and need a machine to breathe at least once a year until I turned 15. But I had also ate up inspiration porn as a child as a motivation to not let my body hold me back if I could. "Aren't we around the same age?" Yam asked me in response. I laughed. "Do I look 23 to you?" I've been mistaken for much younger than I actually was for as long as I could remember. It 1st became a problem when I turned 18 and got told I was clearly 12 with a fake ID when trying to buy an M rate game (Devil May Cry btw). "You're not?” ”Nope.” I rested my elbows on the table, interlocked my fingers, and I placed my chin on top with a smile, "But I'm curious how old you all think I am now." At 25 I was mistaken for a 14

year old. At least, a few months back someone thought I was legal (they guessed 19). Most realized I had to be older the more they talked to me, but their impressions never fully dissipated. As frustrating as it was, I found amusement in times like this by turning my age into a guessing game. Sharkkan had the face of someone fearing they had hit on someone too young. "You are at least 20, right?” They all suddenly looked worried. "I'm definitely older than 20." I answered. Pisti laughed. She was also short with a baby face; she knew my struggle. "Maybe she's older than Ja'far!” Of course she would make the closest guess. "There's no way she's older than me." Ja'far scoffed. "I am older than 25 though.” I could have teased him but I held my tongue since he already seemed annoyed with me. "How old are you then?” Hina asked. "I'm 29.” I smiled at everyone's surprise. I might only have surface levels similarities to Sinbad, but when you're a simp for a fictional character does that really matter? "I was born on April 7th so I should only be 5 days younger than King Sinbad since he was born on the 2nd. However, I don't know if there's a time dilation between my world and this one. The day we met was Oct 3rd for me back home. It wasn't the same date here, was it?" Sinbad is 29, Ja'far is 25, and Masrur is 20 during the Balbadd arc; their 2nd set of ages are 30, 26, and 21 respectfully. Ja'far's birthday is Aug 30th and Masrur's is Dec 27. Those 2nd ages listed can't be for right after the 6 month time skip because no matter how you calculate it the shortest distance between those 3 birthdays is 8 months. I was really interested in how the current arbiter of this world was going to figure this out. "It was Oct 3rd here too." "Oh. Well, that's convenient," was what I said while my thoughts were cursing the arbiter. 'That lazy son of a bitch synced the worlds so they wouldn't have to deal with a time dilation. I can feel it. Hold on... I arrived on Oct 3rd; the coup was 4 days later on the 7th. 6 months later would mean Sinbad arrives back in Sindria on my birthday. Did some 'real me' somewhere plan a b-day present for myself in some self-indulgent fanfiction??' ((Yes. Yes, I did UwU & I plan on making Mori panic then too.)) King Sinbad had that smile on his face that told me he was ready to flirt. "I didn't realize we were so close in age." No colors got in my way when he talked. That was good. I was desensitized again, and wouldn't have to deal with unnecessary distractions. I couldn't tease Ja'far, but I could tease his Majesty. "I know, right? It's amazing what the difference of 5 days can do for one's complexion." Sinbad froze and his expression went blank. Something that was probably wine sprayed across the table as Sharkkan had a spit take before erupting into laughter with Hinahoho and Pisti. "Oh my" Yam murmured with a hand over her mouth. Drakon , Spartos, and Ja'far stared at me in disbelief. Sinbad still wasn't responding... Maybe teasing him about his age was a bad idea. So far, unless it was something important I flirted with Sinbad since that was the best way to get on his good side; hearing something like this from me must have hurt a bit extra. I had been so wrapped up in my thoughts that I forgot just how sensitive he was about his age. I ended up flailing my hands from nerves, and to get his attention. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have said that when I know how self conscious you are." He flinched. "I don't know if this will make you feel any better, but you won't look any older than you do now 5 years from now..." "I uh.. Is that so?" Sinbad asked as he started to regain himself. "It is. You'll be just as-” "If you're willing to talk about the future, does that mean you are finally ready to explain about those calamities you mentioned in Balbadd?" Ja'far cut in with a fierce look. He had been waiting for any mention of the future to bring this up. The King spoke with a gentle but stern tone. "I don't know if this is the time for that conversation. This is Mori's first meal with

everyone after all." "I'm fine. I made a promise and I intend to keep it. As long as everyone else is willing to talk seriously for a few mins, I don't see the problem." I had been avoiding this conversation for long enough. There were things I still planned to keep secret, but I couldn't avoid having this conversation forever. And besides, I could feel in the waves that Ja'far wasn't going to let this night end unless I explained some of it. ((I have the next 3 chapters written but it's going to take me a bit to draw all of illustrations & comics. Also, good luck to all the students reading this. I know classes are starting up again. Be safe out there.))

#magi prophet fanfic #sinbad x oc #magi sinbad x oc #king sinbad #sinbad magi #magi fanfic #magi sinbad #yamuraiha

[khaleesiofalicante]

i met a 7th grader today and she was so?? nice??

we had an extra break today and I was sitting there reading a book while she was revising for her test.

personally i've had absolutely shitty seniors and when i became one i wanted to let the younger ones know im willing to help them with anything because i know a bunch of shitty people from my grade too.

anyway i knew they had a test today because i'd seen a bunch of other girls from her grade studying the same thing in the morning.

i tossed her a piece of candy and then everything went quiet again with us doing our own stuff. then i started talking to her about the notes in her hand and asked if i could help.

i started explaining them to her (DAMN IT THEY WERE MUCH HARDER THEN THE STUFF WE DID IN GRADE 7 LIKE WTF??) and we just started talking about different things.

her friends were such bitches ugh. she was obviously trying to get some space from them and they come and just go how their class is in trouble for some shit (been there) and like bitch wear your mask properly??? istg they really started discussing cheating plans in front of me like??? hi i can report you??? istg kids these days have no respect.

She told me how she was failing in a bunch of her classes and i offered to tutor her for free because it's not like i have 5 tests in the next week...nervous laughter.

i gave her my number so she could text me anytime she needed help with things. she even complimented my accent and that made me feel so nice because I've been made fun for my accent before and have been called "burger" which basically means I'm a show-off and a pick me kind of person and even though it was a long time ago i still feel insecure when speaking and try to shift my accent so it meant a lot when she complimented me on it.

now we're friends because i say so.

also she was so surprised when i mentioned which grade i was from like she was expecting me to be younger and it kind of hit me that oh shit I'M the senior now y'know?

This got long but overall my day went really well. I got to skip Programming because i was sick (THANK YOU COFFEE) and got some pretty good writing tips from our english teacher and found a really cool book in the library. and of course, the extra break and my new friend!!

ok this got long=

It's always nice to make new friends. And it's always nice to help people have better experiences than we did. I'm proud of you.

And I'm so glad you had a good day. This was long overdue, wasn't it? You deserved this.

Here is to more <3

#mutuals

[lilangliham]

first quarter as a freshman bsa student.

hello.

i have been using tumblr for 4-5 years but i haven't really figured out how tumblr environment works.

thus i'm here posting for the first time, for myself!

actually, i had already written this last week but my phone hanged, lost the urge to type again, and took at as a sign to post after midterms week!

long post ahead !

class starts at sept 2021━

before setting my foot at my current school, i have decided not to pursue studying at my dream school due to personal (literally intrapersonal) factors. but i am gradually moving on, sincerely grateful for my friend who made me feel that i am not alone c:

i attended my school exactly 3 days after enrolling (may palugit pang 3 days to mentally prepare eme.) which is unfamiliar to me. i was internally panicking. again, grateful for my fellow classmates haha.

my professors were okay, i guess. compare to what i have expected, they are a little bit better. i guess it is just that i have not adjusted, thus making some profs okay, some were less okay. the school accommodated me warmly and the fear of triggering my vulnerability did not show up c:

my first prelims went okay. some of my subjects gave us prelims and i guess it went okay knowing i have not adjusted yet. costacc activities got my whole world spinning, but it is bearable at this point!

class at oct 2021━

everything went okay━much harder than shs, which i have expected. however, i got a failing grade on my 2nd basic finacc quiz (shit.) i was on the verge of breaking down that afternoon, but no tears fell. i have mistakes and i acknowledged it. the "review process" i went through before that day wasn't my effective study habit (and i am still experimenting more ways to effective study habits), the place where i took my quiz was the source of my distraction (mother went to my location non-stop back n forth) , time-pressue is my weakness, and i literally just cannot focus comprehend that day. sucks. i was traumatized. lol.

that was my wake-up call.

consequently, i started organizing myself and my surroundings. in that way, my thoughts would be in order and i can prioritize, control, and manage everything at least. aside from weekly planner, i made my own daily planner, made a studyblr (yes, this.), discovered the pomodoro technique, and read a lot of study tips. it was discouraging, but i prayed too (i don't feel of giving up, heck, i am just starting ?!). prayer helped a loooot!

another quiz came by from a core subject. i got the highest grade. i applied a preferred study habit, and it was indeed effective. i hate how my study habit is tiring and time consuming tbh :( i'm looking for more ways how to revise it and seek its effectivity in a short time.

i just finished my six-day midterms week! i feel like dying! studying! literally! sleep costs a fortune to me and i sacrificed it for this week. accounting subjects are indeed tough though i already had the basics (shs), it was still not enough. i am worried for my major midterm exam grades. i am certainly not satisfied with everything. still, i am not efficient, but i'd like to think that i am slowly improving. little progress :( hopefully after academic break, i will be better than the last quarter. btw these days, reading bible verses and prayer empower me. it gives me energy and just... power. i do not socialize a lot, but i am glad i have scriptures to guide me along the way (bago pa ako masiraan ng ulo). it is my companion before i strive the day c:

p.s. excuse for the photos. pasensya, walang study table. pati salamin ko pagod na sa'kin HAHAH

goals after academic break:

make studying a daily habit

practice ! practice ! practice !

prioritize academics !

time management

write notes as early as possible

make time for advance reading

listen to every discussion (please 'wag na lutang)

enjoy and value every moment

hopefully, i can make it.

1 Peter 5:7━lilang liham.

#lilangliham #studyblr #studyblr ph #first mail

[rogerstoast]

Garage Band//Roger Taylor x Fem Reader

warnings: fluff ig, really simple and cute

AN: I wrote this a long ass time ago and never revised it so apologies in advance for errors.

You were in your second year at Imperial College, and struggling to get through your second set of finals this year. Only three more exams to get through and you could finally say hello to summer.

The fact that you have been sitting at your desk studying for the last six hours, didn't help with stress either. No matter how much you studied, you just couldn't seem to grasp any bit of information from the papers in front of you.

Figuring it was going on six, and you have been sitting in an old wooden chair since noon, a well deserved break was needed. Capping your pen, you got up, stretched, grabbed your jacket and headed out of your dorm for a walk.

As you were walking down the streets of London, subtle music began to play in the distance. It wasn't half bad either. Quite decent actually. The music grew louder and you noticed a few, small groups of people, mostly girls, were gathered on the driveway of the house.

You looked both ways before crossing the street to see what was going on. Once you reached the house, it was hard to get about considering so many students were crowding the lot. Squeezing through and shoving past all the bodies was a struggle, but you managed to get to the front and into the garage.

Just as expected, it was a band. Now that you're here, you remembered your friend telling you about them a few days ago. But you weren't expecting them to be this good. The group was made up of three uni students. A tall one with wavy dark hair playing the guitar, and another dark haired guy, a little shorter, playing the bass. They both were singing. Along with the fella who caught your eye instantly. He had blond, wavy hair and played the drums wonderfully. Never missing a beat, and harmonized with the group beautifully.

About two songs in, you felt a tap on your shoulder.

"(Y/n)! What are you doing here?" It was your friend Lorali, the one who told you about  the band.

"Needed to get some fresh air after sitting at that desk for so long. Thought I'd see what was so special about this band you were telling me about" I told her.

"Well I'm glad you came! Wanna go get a drink with me? Bars inside."

Accepting the fact that it was a Friday night and you studied enough for the day, you gave into her offer.

"Sure thing!" Following Lorali to the door located behind the band, you figured you would steal another glance at the drummer, as you were about to past him. However, he seemed to have caught your glance just as they were finishing their song. You immediately looked away, and followed your friend through the door, as you felt a slight blush rise to your cheeks.

"What are you blushing about," she asked you, noticing your obvious flushed complexion.

"Wh-what? Nothing. Just need a drink that's all."

"Oh please (y/n), what kinda twat do you think I am. Do you really think I didn't see you making heart eyes at the drummer a second ago?"

Damn it Lorali.

She could always see right through you.

"Oh shut up! Doesn't matter, it's obvious he's the womanizer of the group, what should it matter to me?" But before she could deny anything, I poured myself a shot of whisky and downed it as fast as I could. Feeling a wave of relief already, I gave her a look as if to say alright, go on.

"The night is still young, (y/n). Let's go back out there, they're almost done!

Following her back out to the garage, you noticed it had got darker outside, and string lights lit up the garage as students gathered around a fire pit on the driveway, smoking and dancing along to the music.

Lorali led you to the couch up front, and you took a seat right next to her, each with a beer in hand. Facing the band, they sang and rocked their hearts out to their closing song. You happened to really like it. Wether it was the subtle head bops, or the perfect rhythm he managed to keep, you couldn't keep your eyes off of the drummer. He played perfectly. The song then came to a faster, more rock n roll bit and the guitarist played a rif while blondie hit the drums harder and faster than before.

This time when he caught you staring at him, you didn't look away immediately right after. Same goes for him, giving you a wink and a cheeky smile. Doubting the possibility he could be looking at you, you turned your head around to see if the group of girls from earlier was behind you or something. Only to find them outside, and groups of guys behind you instead. When you turned around, he seemed to notice your disbelief, and subtly laughed to himself. You blushed and looked down, feeling slightly embarrassed that you thought he wasn't gesturing towards you.

Drinking from your cup, they finished the song and ended it with harmonizing their voices and it sounded like the most spectacular thing you have ever heard before.

doooiinnn allllllrrrrrriiiggghhhhhtttt

The guitarist then spoke into the mic, "Thanks for coming out everybody, we really appreciate it!"

You sighed to yourself, that the live music was over for the night. But just as a record started playing from the corner of the room, you stood up for your spot on the couch, next to your friend. In need for a quick smoke, you informed her you were going to stand outside for a bit and warm up by the fire.

Noticing people have either left or gone to get their second round of drinks, you stood next to the fire pit, struggling to warm up. Pulling a pack and a lighter from your coat pocket, you were slightly disappointed to see that you were all out.

"Having a bit of trouble over there?" You heard a deep voice ask you from behind, causing you to turn around.

Crap. It's him. "Oh I uh, I uh, I'm all out, that's all," you awkwardly chuckle and look down.

"No worries," the drummer then pulls out a pack and offers you a cigarette.

You take it as your fingers lightly brush over his. "Thanks," you say, with a small smile.

You both light your cigarettes and you allow yourself to really let it sink in before taking a long breath out.

"I'm a, I'm Roger by the way," the drummer offered is hand out for you to shake

"(Y/n)," you reply, shaking his hand in return. 

"Wow, that's a nice name. How come I've never seen you around here before?" he asked.

You blush a little and turn to meet his eyes. Wow, you thought. It was the first time you saw his big blue eyes. Just as you were about to get lost in them, you remembered he asked you a question.

"Oh, I uh, I came with my friend. You guys were amazing by the way, should've come around sooner."

He chuckled and took a small step closer to me, "Thanks, I'm glad you enjoyed it. I feel like I've seen you around." his mention came off more as a question.

"Yeah, im a uni student. Second year actually, majoring in fashion design. What about you?" I asked him, bringing my cigarette back up to my lips.

"Dental student. Doesn't seem to be working out well. Hoping this band thing works out," he said, looking back at me.

"Ah I wouldn't worry about it, you guys were amazing," I reassured him with a smile, hoping I wasn't coming off too obsessive with all the compliments I was giving him.

But Roger loved how you would blush and gawk over the band. Although you never noticed him until this night, he has noticed you since the beginning of his second year at uni. He sat at the very back in a class you two shared with each other, but you never seemed to noticed he existed until today. Roger on the other hand, was the total opposite. He noticed you the first day, and couldn't get over how beautiful you were. The way you concentrated so hard in class to make sure you took all the right notes, and the way your tongue would poke out of your mouth when you were focused. Roger admired all of it. Everything about you. But, he never had the courage to talk to until tonight. It was almost as if he had been intimidated by your perfection, and it made him nervous, which is not in his nature. Being known as the womanizer and all. 

"If I don't know any better, I'd say you have a little crush on the band," he brought up, trying to mess with you.

"Oh shut up!" you joked back, nudging his shoulder with yours, both of you lightly chuckling. It was only then when you realized how close you too actually were. Standing there, shoulder to shoulder.

You then realized your beer was empty when you went for another sip. Figuring you walked here, maybe it would be best to start heading back

"Well, i uh, I should get going I guess."

"Wait"

But just as you were about to walk away, Roger grabbed your hand to turn you around. Very quickly actually, resulting in your noses almost bumping each other as your faces grew closer all of a sudden. Neither of you said anything for a second, but just looked at each other. Both sets of eyes quickly looking down at each other's lips, then back at each other's eyes. Yet the awkward tension took over, making the moment suddenly uncomfortable.

"Let me get you another drink at least?" He offered.

You easily obliged with a simple, "okay," and a small smile.

He took your hand and led you through the garage past the bunch of people who were still there, and into the house to the kitchen.

While Roger went to the fridge to grab two beers, you hopped up and sat on the corner.

"So Rog, is this your house?" You asked curiously. 

He walked over to stand in front you, and handed you the can.

"Yeah, I've been rooming with Brian for a couple of months now."

You don't know why, but you felt so at ease around him. A sudden wave of confidence washed over you, causing the next question to come out of your mouth without a care in the world.

"I assume that means you have your own room then?"

Roger knew what you were intending with that question. He raised an eyebrow with a smirk on his face as he walked closer to you, standing in between your legs.

"I suppose it does," he replied, your faces merely a few inches away from each other.

Roger placed a hand on your thigh, taking you  a bit by surprise. But you allowed it, and you couldn't help but feel more at ease because of it. The moment, it felt so right. But why? You barely knew him. You feel like you did, but you didn't.

"Hey (y/n)" Roger whispered, as our faces grew closer

"Yeah"

"I know you barely know me, but I need to be honest. Ever since I saw you the first day of uni, I thought you were absolutely stunning. I always sit at the back of class, and I can help but admire your perfection. It kills me, everyday when I see you."

This took you by surprise even more. That's why Roger looked familiar to you. But what he just confessed to you made your heart skip a beat, and cause butterflies to literally explode in your stomach. You were blushing uncontrollably and had a huge smile plastered on your face. Why? You didn't know. Even though you barely knew each other, everything felt as if it was meant to be happening.

"Roger, I-"

But before you could say anything, he leaned in and crashed his lips into yours. It was fast, but sweet and loving at first. You flung your arms around his neck, running your hand through his hair. He brought his other hand up to your cheek as the kiss became more heated. Both of you craved each other, need each other. Roger has been the missing thing in your life all along.

Roger then took his hands, slid them under your thighs, signaling for you to jump on him. Which you did, wrapping your legs around his torso as his hands made their way under your ass to hold you up. He then started kissing you down your neck, leaving love bites all over. The feeling completely melting your insides, you grabbed his face with both hands and connected your lips together yet again.

Before you knew it, Roger had already carried you upstairs. Your lips not letting go for even a single breath of air, the two of you pushed the door open, only for him to slam it shut with his foot, ready for night of his life.

——————————————————

#80s #classic rock #queen #rogah taylah #roger #roger taylor #brian #brianmay #freddie mercury #deacon #bohemian rhapsody #ben hardy #rami malek #gwilym lee #joe mazzello #fanfic #roger taylor x reader #ben hardy x reader

[whippedkoalas]

could you do a drabble where noora is stressed about school and william comforts her? I've been having exams all week and I'd love to read something nice❤

Hello! Good luck with your exams! I hope you’ll love your drabble. I apologize in advance for the mistakes. I wrote this in an airport on my phone, lol.

Two years ago, Noora had underestimated the level of stress William and Chris had been under and she realizes that now that her exams are starting… Soon. Too soon. 

Noora doesn’t work well under pressure. She loves to be organized, to know what she has to do and to do it in time. Younger, she loved to do her homework for the week during the weekend, just to be sure she would not be late. 

With the traditional Russtinden also happening right now, and Vilde putting even more pressure on her shoulders, she feels like she’s drowning. 

She has always been a great student and she knows that this year, she could fail. Because she didn’t study enough, because she had to befriend people who care about being social and Russ, because she decided to follow them to parties more time than she should have, because she chose to move in with William just a few months ago. (they never spent a night apart, it was ridiculous to pay for two rents.) 

Now, sitting alone on her bed, surrounded by all her school stuff, she finds a billion of reasons why she’s in that situation right now. 

The truth is: it’s not anyone’s fault. 

It’s not William’s fault; he leaves her alone when she’s studying, tries to help her understand things she doesn’t get because the program didn’t change that much in two years. He also tries to cook for her and to do a maximum of the house chores, but he’s in his first year of law school, which is a lot harder than he thought it would be and therefore he’s also stressed out and spends a lot of time studying too. 

It’s not Vilde’s fault either. Even though she still gives a high importance to their bus and Russtinden, she has partially calmed down. She doesn’t lose sleep over this anymore, which is great. Vilde never forces her to go to parties or to participate. 

She chose to go to the parties, she chose to be a Russ, and she chose to be with William. 

In the last two years, her life drastically changed. The lonely girl who didn’t really care about having friends and thought she would never date anyone doesn’t exist anymore. Maybe she never existed in the first place, Noora isn’t sure. But the reality is there: she’s now dealing with the problems she didn’t want to deal with when she was 14. 

“no friends, no boyfriend, just studies and hard work” she had said angrily. Well, that didn’t really work out. 

If she was rational, she totally would know she’s not failing. Far from it. But when Noora is having a panic attack, logic doesn’t apply. 

She feels like she’s drowning, like she’s suffocating and nobody can save her. 

With a huge sigh, she lets tears fall down. She closes her books and puts them away. She lays down and closes her eyes. 

She opens them again when she hears William coming home. 

She knows he’s gonna try to find her to say hello. 

She also knows that if he sees her like that, he’s gonna worry for her and try to make her talk to him. 

When she hears him coming her way, she pretends to be asleep. 

William opens the door carefully and looks at her. She expects him to close the door, but instead, he goes to the bed, undresses, puts everything he finds on the bed away carefully and lays down next to her. 

She should know by now that William knows her as well as she knows him. 

He doesn’t touch her, doesn’t talk. He acts like she’s asleep, even though he probably knows that she’s just pretending. 

His presence is soothing her already. After a few minutes, she gives up and moves closer to him. He immediately puts his arm around her and kisses her forehead. 

“what’s going on?”

“nothing. I’m fine” her voice betrays her but she really doesn’t want to talk about everything now.

“Noora” he starts. “what’s going on?”

She sighs. A few tears fall down again. 

“did something happen?” he tries again. She can hear worry in his voice. She hates that he still worries about his brother because that bastard never got punished for what he did to her. She couldn’t face him, she didn’t want William to face him either and it's…. Unfair. 

Her crying intensifies. 

“Noora, I’m here. I’ve got you.” William whispers. 

“nothing happened. I promise. Everything is okay”

“Well, clearly, something is not okay, babe”

She bursts into tears. “I’m gonna…. “

“no. You’re not gonna die.”

“are you sure?”

William moves a bit and takes her chin in his hand. 

“Noora, I promise you. You’ll be fine. Whatever it is that’s bothering you, we’ll deal with it.”

She nods and rests her head on his chest. 

“it’s too much. Exams, Russ. I’m gonna fail.” she whispers. 

William plays with her hair. With her head on his chest, she can hear William breath a sigh of relief. 

“you’re gonna smash your exams babe. I know that. I’ll help you if you need. But hear me out for a sec, okay? If you do not graduate this year, then you don’t graduate this year. You won’t be a failure because you have to take those exams again. It doesn’t matter. Just do your best.”

“it does matter because I’ll be a year behind and… “

“Noora. No. I’m sure it won’t happen, but it’s not the end of the world. You know school systems are social constructs that do not mean anything. Your grades do not define who you are. You wouldn’t be a year behind. You just would take those exams again. But, again, I’m sure you’re gonna be brilliant as you always are.”

His voice is even more soothing than his presence. Noora calms down, listening to William breathing. 

“you know that you sound just like me? It’s scary. That’s something I would have said to someone else.” she huffs.

William caresses her back and smiles. 

“You’re inspiring, you know. Sometimes it’s difficult to apply your own advice to yourself so I’m just the messenger. That’s why I’m here for.”

Noora stays in William’s embrace for a while, but then reality hits her again. She has to study. 

“I should go back to studying. Can you handle dinner?” she tells him, a slight smile on her lips. 

“Noora, you’re not studying tonight. You won’t be concentrated enough and all you will manage to achieve is giving you a headache and another panic attack” William points out. 

“but I’m already behind on my schedule and I really need to revise this chapter tonight because tomorrow it will be too late and I need to study”

“okay. As you want. I’ll be in the living room. Promise me that you will call me if you don’t feel well?”

Noora nods and grabs her biology book. 

Not even fifteen minutes later, William sees a very tired Noora sitting down next to him. Her eyes are red and swollen so he takes her in his arms. 

“I’m such a mess,” she tells him, hiding her face in his neck. 

“no, you’re not.” he says. “you’re just stressed.”

“I don’t understand anything to biology. I’m going crazy.”

“Isn’t that Sana’s thing?” 

“Yes, but she isn’t patient enough to teach me. I’m fucked.” Noora sighs.

“Ok, this is what we could do. We order pizza, you relax a bit while we’re waiting, we eat together and then I can try to help you with biology. Chris nailed his exam, so we can always call him if we don’t understand” William suggest with a smile.

Noora nods and smiles. “great idea, boyfriend! I think a little make-out session might help me relax.”  

Noora is back, mission accomplished. 

#drabble #noorhelm

[ybyg]

久しぶりでしょうね？ Let's catch up.

I haven't been diligently studying Japanese due to... just life. Some unavoidable things happened and I had to live through the nightmare. It's all right now. I think. I'm here to update you about how miserable it's been trying to catch up with what I've missed and maybe talk about the time I spoke to JO1's Sho who can speak English and I wanted to make an effort to speak to him in Japanese but failed (without sounding like a twat who's showing off).

Continue reading under the cut.

Note: I barely edited it, so if it sounds out of place, or my Japanese sounds awkward... tough luck, I'm probably not going to edit it.

1. Wanikani update

レベル１０に入ってでした。正直は、まだレベル9ですね。This thing levels up as soon as you learn everything there is on the level you formerly in, without taking into account if you have complete at least a round of revision on the last thing that you've learned (they call it 'review' on WK).

The SRS thing is proven to be the best method to recall phrases and kanji. I'm paying for Wanikani (okay, the thing is good. I like it) and have Anki installed and haven't reviewed anything since I created my decks. But it works alright. I may have the worst memory/information-retaining brain and it might've taken me forever to recall what 予 is (it's beforehand, apparently), but I can still remember the ones I've learned the longest; basically from levels 1-4. (I'm learning 予 in the latest level, that is level 9. I'm still suffering turbulence here.)

I haven't seen my stats. Let's have a look, shall we?

I live by the words 'it could've been worse.'

My percentages used to be at least in the 90% across the board, but I just jumped straight into reviewing and clearing over 900 radicals, kanji, and vocabulary without revising, hence why I've done terribly and now it's bringing my stats down.

Radicals I can't believe I fucked up my radicals. They were supposed to be the easiest. I have no words.

If you need a single tip to start learning kanji, you can start by learning its components, and that is the radicals. It'd be easier for you to create stories for mnemonics. Other than that, try Heisig's Remembering the Kanji.

Kanji I am aware I could've done better at this, but kanji itself is just confusing. It's sometimes easy to predict some of the words, like ち that's used for earth or soil (地) and pond (池)--and not to mention the difference is just the radicals soil and tsunami--but I deduced that some aspects of nature fall under the ち umbrella.

And then there are devils like 他 and 地. Ugh. I'm going to leave it here.

Vocabulary

I know what the word 交じる stands for, and then you have 交わる which is thrown into the mix just to confuse me, and that just pisses me off every damn time.

I honestly know the meaning better than the pronunciation... which is dumb because if I were to speak in Japanese, I'm supposed to say the words majiru or majiwaru, not to be mixed or to intersect.

One thing about WK: you might understand the meaning differently. For example, they may offer the word substitution, but I would think of another word, replacement. Unless you input the word 'replacement' into the system, it would still be wrong in your reviews, and you're expected to remember substitution instead. And as an ESL, well, sometimes I'm just expected to drill the word substitution into my brain. I barely use the word daily anyway. So, you're expected to do extra work in order to learn, which is not a bad thing, but it can be annoying sometimes.

To recap, I don't do terribly despite not doing WK for a few months, but I could've done better. It's still in the okay territory, but I'll do my best to improve my reading skills and expand my lexicon.

What's next? I still have to clear up 92 lessons which include the level 9 that I've yet to cover and the entirety of level 10. On top of that, the tens and hundreds of reviews need to be cleared out daily... it's still going to be a rigorous routine when it comes to this one.

2. Grammar (and Reading)

In order not to spend my own money on learning materials, I persuaded my mum to get me みんなの日本語 (MNN); both workbook and notes for Level 1, and I chipped in with my Kinokuniya discount card. Yes, I am 26, but my finances haven't been the greatest as of late, so if anyone needs to hire a writer/social media manager, please send me a DM.

I digressed. Anyway, I've reached the 4th chapter, and it's been great so far! The workbook is completely in Japanese, and as someone who can read hiragana, and to some extent, katakana, it's definitely a great book that helps me improve my reading skills. I wish WK and MNN were at least streamlined because the kanji on WK has the tendency to be more scattered due to the complexity of certain kanji despite them being N5-N4 kanji.

[I edited out a paragraph on Kanji levels and complexities but would like to highlight the inconsistencies in the kanji levels that's shared on the Internet, including in WK. I suppose you will never find the one true answer as to which level does 傘 (umbrella) belongs to: is it N5 per stated in Jisho, or is it N1 as stated in WK? I guess you will never know...)

I prefer MNN over Genki as Genki explains points in English and annotates translation/furigana as bright as day underneath the Japanese texts. As a high-functioning English/romaji reader, my brain isn't doing the hard word; it's just reading the English and romaji. MNN forces me to read in Japanese and makes me translate the sentences on my own, so I am actively learning from the activity. Whilst it has a separate book that explains the chapters in English, I find it very helpful for me to immerse myself in Japanese then flip through the English version of the book just to see how well I understand the lesson. I would suggest Genki for absolute beginners and MNN for those who are in the lower-intermediate level.

I've been reading JO1's mails and articles related to them with varying degree of successes. The shorter ones are simpler and more manageable, but reading longer ones make me quit halfway. I should be reading more so it'd be easier for me to recognise the ones I've yet to learn and strengthening those I've learned.

3. Active learning (Speaking, Listening and Writing)

I've tried to speak in Japanese to myself, and it's mostly え、なんだろう今。。。、ヤッバ、マジ？、いいですね！、ほんまに？ and the latter being 'really?' in Kansai dialect (関西弁), thanks to half of the members of JO1. Since I'm learning 'textbook', formal Japanese, I'm still finding it extremely difficult to communicate in vernacular/colloquial Japanese. Not that I'm familiar with 敬語 (keigo/honorific language) either, just trying to fit the よ, ね, です, します, ません et cetera have racked my brain and I'm at the precipice of trying not to lose my mind. Perhaps, if I tried harder, I'd be able to use it comfortably. But for now, please let me suffer from my stupidity.

Since I wanted to 'try harder', I'm currently going through Making Out in Japanese (it sounds crude, but so far it's been very mild and helpful)

I haven't been writing in Japanese, which is horrible, because what's the use of reading when you can't write. I tried making my own flashcards which ended up taking too much time so I turned to digitalised SRS instead, which can be both annoying and unhelpful sometimes. I'm not a fan of learning through the screen as it takes too much space on the table and plays a part as my focus destroyer. But I can't complain as these devices do make things infinite times easier for me.

For the past couple of weeks, I've interacted with more Japanese JAMs (that's what JO1 decided to christen their fans) and have made the effort to type in Japanese, albeit broken Japanese. I employed my brain, Jisho and the untrusting Papago and Google Translate (the translation sites merely help me check if my sentences make any sense). I bet they're reading my tweets and messages thinking, 'What the fuck is this person on about?' Well, I don't know either.

And here comes the horrible part.

I won yonton (용통 in Korean, basically a video call) and had the chance to speak to the JO1's leader. Which is awesome, yes? I had a week to prepare and that particular week leading up to the event had given me multiple heart attacks. Some dramas happened, an interview happened... and I had only a few days left to prepare. Towards the end of the week, I decided I was going to do 自己紹介 (self-introduction) in Japanese. I know enough to say *キラです。クアラルンプール出身です。マレーシアJAM です, though that sounds super awkward. What I did on the day was the exact opposite.

Well, it's a known fact that the leader speaks English. Heck, it's an open secret that we know he went to a school that had an English department, whatever that means. As the owner of this brain who've spent approximately weeks and hundreds of hours on Japanese, I think know enough to say those words. But what did I do?

I spoke to him in English.

Of course, like everything, it takes a while to set in. That evening, it occurred to me that not only I had spoken to him in English, I also didn't let him speak. I didn't let him finish his sentence.

To be fair, it was only for 30 seconds. I don't need him to speak, and I wanted to, for once, assert my dominance. (The running joke here is that he plays the character of a freaking flirt, and as a lesbian whose compulsory heterosexual crush is him, I have the inclination to get the man to sit down and shut up for once. I guess I did?)

It's not me if there's no faux pas. Anyways...

Today's the 290th day since I started using WK, basically the beginning of my journey to relearn Japanese. Will I be able to communicate at least on a conversational level by the time I'm 30? We will see.

If you're reading this and needs recommendations on resources that are free, hit me up!

またね。

#qila learns nihongo