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hellodarling1357 · 4 months

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Flames and Embers - Cassian x Vanserra!Reader (slow burn)

Summary: As Beron's sixth child, and only daughter, you had spent your whole life being overlooked and under utilitised. It wasn't until Amarantha's reign that your talents were truly recognised for what they were - too bad you were forced to make a bargain to keep them secret

A/N: Hi! This started out as a request I received the other week but then turned into something completely different and so far from the original request that it’s now getting it’s own multi-part story

This will eventually become a Cassian x Reader fic with a bit of angst, fluff, slow burn, enemies-to-lovers, and all the other fun tropes we know and love!

Enjoy 🥰

Word Count: 3k

Being the only daughter of the Autumn Court’s High Lord, alongside having seven brothers to compete with, you had been overlooked for most of your life which was just fine by you.

You had used the cover of being just a female in an archaic court to your advantage and took the time to observe and learn whatever you could. After being forced to witness how your brothers treated Lucien, you had always tried to have his back, which only went so far when any show of defiance from you was met with a beating. When Lucien had been forced out of your home, you had been heartbroken it had come to it but also happy that your youngest brother could finally become his own person and escape the cruelty that had followed him around his whole life.

Eris had always tried to keep an eye on you. He wouldn’t give up the façade in front of the others, however, he would find the time whenever he could to take you out riding into a long-forgotten part of the woods where he would teach you how to fight. The day you landed him on his ass had been one of his proudest moments, but that didn’t stop him from upping the pressure, forcing you to become stronger and more tactful in each step. Knowing that you could easily take on the rest of your brothers is what kept you from lashing out at their comments and actions towards you; with Lucien gone, you had become their next punching bag to which your father turned a blind eye.

Then Amarantha showed up and everything was turned on its head.

It was in no way a pleasant 50 years, however, you managed to stay out of harm’s way, no doubt at the hands of Eris' doing, and managed to avoid most of the horrors that occurred. However, once the human girl, Feyre, had arrived, you made yourself more present in the ongoings of Amarantha’s court, unable to leave the girl fully alone and fending for herself. Your need to help her was further spurred on upon realising that Lucien appeared to be her friend.

Lucien. The thought that your brother, the one who had managed to escape the past 50 years of torment, was now here as well had you feeling as though you had somehow let him down, even though it was completely out of your control. You hadn’t been present the first time Tamlin had sent Lucien to seek out Amarantha, the time when she had so viciously carved out his eye that even some of your brothers seemed somewhat affronted. However, you were there now. You had watched on in horror as Lucien defended Feyre, and then the 20 lashes Tamlin was forced to give after he helped with the first task…

Once Lucien had been allowed to retreat to his room, you had spent the next hour finding out as much as you could about Amarantha's plans for Feyre and your brother. With healing supplies in hand, you ventured into the sprawling court to where you had been told Lucien resided. With a quiet knock on his door, you entered the room and felt your heart break at the shaken, broken form of your brother. Despite the clear pain he was in, he had leapt off the bed at the sight of you and was quick to pull you into a tight embrace.

“Y/N,” He had exclaimed, carefully surveying you for any signs of injury. “Are you alright? What’s happened? Cauldron, I’ve missed you.” Then he was pulling you into another hug that left you in tears.

When was the last time you had seen him? It had been decades.

“I’m fine,” You brushed him off and made him sit so you could assess his injuries. “You look like you’ve seen better days.” He made a non-committal sound in response, taking in a deep breath at the sting of the healing balm you helped spread across his back. You pushed onto your heels, assessing the damage and your makeshift attempt of bandaging the wounds.

“What can I do?” You asked, feeling just as helpless as you did when growing up.

“Check in on Feyre. Please. I can’t…I can’t do anything, not now. And whatever game Tamlin is playing, he won’t go see her. Please. She’s all alone.” You hesitated for a moment but found yourself nodding.

“Of course. Of course I’ll go and see her.” You lowered your voice, not trusting that anywhere in this place was truly safe. “Does she truly love him?” If she did, then you all had a chance of getting out.

“She does.” Lucien answered, a small smile tugging on his lips.

“Anything else, let me know, alright? I’ll go and check on her.” You gave your brother a final hug and then slipped from the room, making your way towards the dungeons.

*****

“Feyre?” You whispered into the darkness, the guards were in the middle of their rotation, so you had few valuable minutes to slip in and out undetected, the limited healing supplies and food you managed to take with you were clutched tightly into the folds of your dress.

An incoherent groan sounded from further down the dark, cage-lined corridor. You hurried over, halting in your steps when you saw her sitting against the wall still covered in blood and mud, a pained expression on her weary face.

“Feyre? I’m Y/N. I’m Lucien’s sister, he asked me to check on you, see how you were holding up.” You tried to stay optimistic but the wound on her arms was nothing that you could fix. Maybe before Amarantha stifled everyone’s magic you would stand a chance, but not now when all you could offer were some clean rags, a bit of water and a scrap of bread.

You knelt on the floor in front of her cell, unable to get in without your magic or access to the key.

“I know it hurts, but are you able to move a bit closer, I can’t help you from here.” You cringed as you watched Feyre grit her teeth, slowly moving across the floor, pain evident on her face.

“Y/N?” She asked in a strained voice, you nodded with a small smile, passing her the bread which she quickly bit into. “Lucien told me about you. Said that you were here.”

“I don’t have long, here, give me your arm I’ll do my best to clean it but there’s not much else I can do. At least not right now.” You wiped away the blood and muck that lingered from the first task, trying not to grimace as you took in the severity of the wound. The sound of movement spurred you on, quickly ushering her to drink the water and finish the bread so you could leave before getting caught.

“I’ll try to get back here soon, okay?” Feyre was already making her way back towards the rear wall where she slumped against it. You were almost out when a small voice called out.

“Y/N? Thank you.”

*****

Managing to obtain some of the healing balm that you had used on Lucien's injuries, you kept to the shadows as you made your way back down to the dungeons.

You had been keeping an ear out for what Amarantha’s plans were for the girl; if she planned on healing her before the next task or leaving her in the dark cell to fend for herself. Either way, you couldn’t be too obvious in your efforts to help, lest you get caught and wind up dead for the blatant disregard of Amarantha's orders.

The sound of voices had you slowing in your steps as you overhead the back end of a conversation. Someone was in Feyre’s cell with her.

“Oh, that’s wonderfully gruesome.” You recognised that voice, but surely it wasn’t…

Feyre swore at the male, earning her a chuckle as he taunted, “Such words from a lady.”

You edged closer to the cell, unsure what your next move would be from here but still unwilling to leave her to fend for herself against Rhysand.

“Get out,” Feyre’s voice was frail as she tried to show her strength against the High Lord.

“Don’t you want me to heal your arm? Or is that what Y/N Vanserra is here to do? I know you’re there, Y/N.” His voice called out to you now.

Shit.

You approached the cell; it was too late to turn back. Your best chance was to play along with his games, there was not point in running, not when he knew you were there and that it clearly wasn’t your first visit.

“Hmm, wiping away the grime was a valiant effort, and what’s this you have?” The healing balm disappeared from your grasp, reappearing moments later in Rhysand’s hand. “Well, that’s not going to do much against the infection and broken bones.”

Rhysand turned back to face Feyre, “But how about a trade? I’ll heal your arm in exchange for you. Two weeks every month, two weeks of my choosing, you’ll live with me at the Night Court. Starting after this messy three-trials business.” You desperately shook your head, trying to tell her he couldn’t be trusted.

“No.”

“No? Really?”

“Get out.”

“You’d turn down my offer – and for what? A fool’s chance that this healing balm will work? Or are you holding out for your friend – for Lucien, correct? After all, he healed you before, didn’t he? Then convinced his dear sister Y/N to come down to tend to you after the first trial.”

Now Rhysand turned to face you, giving you a look that had you thinking he could see your every thought, which, you remembered with dread, he probably could. You had never been taught how exactly mental shields worked but you did your best to block him out. It clearly wasn’t enough judging from the chuckle and assessing look he gave you before facing Feyre again.

“The way I see things Feyre, you have two options. The first, and the smartest, would be to accept my offer.” Your eyes widened in anticipation as Feyre spat at his feet, but Rhysand continued pacing the length of the cell.

“The second option – and the one only a fool would take – would be for you to refuse my offer and place your life, and thus Tamlin’s, in the hands of chance.”

Rhysand had stopped pacing, staring hard at Feyre who had turned white as a sheet and looked as thought she may pass out at any moment.

“Let’s say I walk out of here. Perhaps this healing balm will work,” He tossed it back to you, desperate in your attempt to grab it before it could shatter to the floor. “Perhaps Lucien will come to your aid and offer his magic. Or perhaps he won’t come at all. Between you and me, he’s been keeping a low profile after his rather embarrassing outburst at your trial. Amarantha’s not exactly pleased with him. Tamlin even broke his delightful brooding to beg for him to be spared – such a noble warrior, your High Lord. She listened, of course – but only after she made Tamlin bestow Lucien’s punishment. Twenty lashes.”

Feyre started shaking, eyes darting up to you in confirmation and what looked like betrayal. You hadn’t told her about the lashes.

“Although, from what I heard, the punishment wasn’t overly effective seeing that the wounds somehow healed over within a few hours without the assistance of magic. You would almost think that something like that healing balm you've got there, Y/N, was used despite Amarantha’s order that there was to be no assistance provided.” Rhysand tutted as he turned to you with a smile that made your stomach coil but said no more on the matter.

“So, Feyre, it’s really a question of how much you’re willing to risk it. I don’t need to invade your thoughts to know that you’re wondering if that fever of yours is the first sign of infection. I already know that you’ve slowly been realising that you’re dying.” There was a beat of silence in which Feyre stared back at him with such hatred, you felt your pulse quicken at the thought that it may be too late to help.

“Well?”

“Go. To. Hell.”

Before you could react, Rhysand lashed out and twisted Feyre’s arm, her scream echoing throughout the cell as she thrashed against him. But he kept his grip, twisting the bone a final time before releasing her arm as she half sobbed and panted through the pain.

“This is the last time I’ll extend my assistance. Once I leave this cell, my offer is dead.” Feyre spat at him again but remained silent.

With a disappointed sigh, Rhysand began to ripple with darkness. You weren’t sure what to think; you couldn’t trust him but if Feyre really was dying and this was her only chance of survival…

“Wait.”

The darkness around the High Lord vanished, solidly appearing again with a grin as he faced Feyre.

“Yes?”

“Just two weeks?”

“Just two weeks. Two teensy, tiny weeks with me every month is all I ask.” He was kneeling in front of her now as he purred out his terms. As if suddenly aware of how much time you had already spent down here, your senses picked up, listening closely for any sounds of the returning guards, but there was nothing.

A surge of magic had you turning to face the cell just as Rhysand grabbed Feyre’s arm. She let out a scream before fainting, head falling against the wall.

“What did you do?” You yelled, banging on the bars of the cell in a futile attempt to get in.

“Exactly what we bargained for. Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten about you, Vanserra.” Before you could process his words, Feyre was suddenly sitting up, with the blood and mud completely gone you could do nothing but watch as some colour finally returned to her cheeks. Letting out a sign you offered her a small smile, at least he had kept his word and healed her arm. The remainder of the bargain was something to think about later when you all got out of this mess. If you all got out of this mess.

“What have you done to me?” Only then did you notice the black swirls that covered her skin and the large eye tattooed in the centre of her palm.

“It’s custom in my court for bargains to be permanently marked upon flesh.”

“Make it go away.”

“You humans truly are grateful creatures, aren’t you?” Rhysand stood back up, darkness wafting around him again. “I think I’ll wait to tell Tamlin about our little bargain. I do wonder if he will be as appreciative as you are. Rest up, Feyre.” And then he was gone in a shadow of night.

“Feyre? Are you alright?” You knelt on the floor outside the cage, surveying her for any signs of potential harm caused by Rhysand, but she just looked tired, troubled.

“I’m fine. My arm is fine. I just feel stupid, he didn’t do that to help me, he did it to hurt Tamlin.”

You let out a sigh, “We’ll deal with that later, alright? At least you’re not about to die, so we will take that as a win.” Standing back up you surveyed her again; she was so young and had already faced so much more than most of the fae here. “I’ve been here too long, I need to go before the guards return. But, Feyre, I’ll be back. I promise.”

*****

You slipped out of the dungeons and hurried down the corridor, quickly ducking behind a corner at the sound of the guards returning.

“Hello, Y/N.”

You jumped at his voice, heart hammering in your chest as you turned to face Rhysand where he casually leant against the wall, picking at his jacket as he surveyed you with mild interest.

“I was starting to wonder about what you had been getting up to after all these years here. We never see you at any of our Lady’s…festivities.”

“I must have missed the invite.” You tried to step around him. You had gone this long without piquing the interest of any of Amarantha’s cronies, managing to stay relatively to yourself, and you’d be damned if you were forced to show your face now.

“Interesting,” His violet eyes continued to assess you. “You know, it doesn’t surprise me really. I remember back when we were just children, playing court whilst forced to join in on the formalities. You always managed to remain in the shadows, yet even back then, you somehow knew everything and got away with so much.”

You stared back, eyes narrowing as you waited for him to continue. He clearly had some angle he was getting at.

“Yes. Those particular skills may be useful to me one day. And while I’m in such a giving mood, how about a bargain of our own? You be my eyes and ears,” You scoffed, already shaking your head as you attempted to walk away again. “And in return, I’ll keep your role in all of this quiet. You wouldn’t want Amarantha to know that it was you who helped Lucien, and now Feyre, would you? After all, I’m sure she would be pleased to be reminded of your presence in her court.”

Glaring at him, you knew he had you cornered. The satisfied smirk that played on his face told you that he knew as well.

With a reluctant sigh you stretched out your hand which he firmly grasped.

“Fine.”

“Lovely.”

You refused to break eye contact with the High Lord as you felt his magic encase your upper arm and shoulder, no doubt leaving a similarly intricate pattern to the one now splayed across Feyre’s arm.

You looked down to see if there was any visible evidence of the bargain, but it was completely covered by your dress. Good. At least that would stop any questions from being asked.

“I’ll be seeing you around, Y/N.” And then he was gone in another shadow of darkness.

#cassian x reader #cassian x y/n #Vanserra!Reader #cassian x you #cassian imagine #cassian acotar #acotar #acofas #acomaf #acosf #acowar #marley writes

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mazeinthemiroh · 1 year

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hii! may i request a skz scenario where they accidentally leak their relationship with reader (also an idol) ?? love ur work btw !!!!!

skz when they accidentally leak their relationship with their s/o

genre: angst af like you guys aren't ready, tad bit of hurt / comfort too, idol! reader

word count: 1k

warnings: so angsty ahah slayyy

pls like and reblog if you enjoy! feel free to request anything <3

bangchan

"do you trust me?"

it was a question you never thought you would have to think about when it came to chan. but now, with the paparazzi outside the hotel you both stayed at last night, it was hard to say. there was just so much uncertainty.

speculations about your relationship rose very quickly and now, in this situation, it was one photo away from being revealed.

but you did trust chan. so you nodded. he took you by the hand firmly and guided you outside the hotel lobby, where you were both greeted by the paparazzi.

and with one swift movement, your lips were on his. you were shocked at chan's choices but you melted into his touch while the cameras flashed around you.

they had broken him. and he didn't care. no more hiding anymore. and that's how he wanted it.

lee know

he was on a live stream when it happened.

just the usual catch-up with stays. something he has done hundreds of times before. nothing much. no pressure... right?

he was showing the stays watching something on his phone until he accidentally swiped to his home screen. which happened to be an exclusive, never seen before picture of you and him together. it was a candid photo seungmin had kindly taken at the time. a very cute, aesthetically pleasing and well-thought-out couples photo. and now, everyone had seen it.

"oh uhh," minho turned his phone off immediately when he realised. "anyway, i'll have to be off now. bye, bye."

he ended the live abruptly, his eyes wide and his breath quickening. he had never been so careless before. what had he done?

changbin

"are the rumours true? can you confirm, officially, that you are, in fact, dating y/n?"

changbin was expecting this question. but that doesn't mean he wasn't still underprepared and absolutely dreading it. for such a confident man he had never felt so nervous and unsure about a situation before.

but he had to do what he had to do.

"i am."

there was a collective gasp that filled the room, not only by the interviewer but also the by audience.

"and i am the happiest man i have ever been. and i plan on continuing this happy life with them for as long as they'll have me," he looked at the camera with a serious gaze, "no matter what."

hyunjin

hyunjin was very bad at hiding the fact that he had much affection for you.

it was so clear. the way he gazed at you in reality shows. the way he pined after you during award ceremonies. he wore his heart on his sleeve when it came to you because you were the love of his life. how could he not?

he was a naturally private person but for him, it didn't feel natural to hide such an overwhelming amount of love. it was only a matter of time before the truth came out.

"i'm so sorry y/n," hyunjin barely whispered, "i couldn't keep this secret any longer."

the tears started to collect in his eyes.

"i need to love you freely."

han

"oh shit."

one drunk night and this happens. headline news: 'han jisung caught kissing kpop idol y/n.' and that someone was you. his partner. his not-so-secret lover. his soulmate. his everything.

he can't believe he had let this happen.

he stared at the phone in disbelief and ran his fingers through his hair, the anxiety bubbling in his chest.

he wondered who would kill him first. his manager? chan? even you? this relationship was secret for a reason. for many reasons, in fact. the questions and thoughts and worries flooded his head until he felt dizzy.

what was he going to do?

felix

'felix is dating y/n??'

that's all felix saw. every social media platform he went on, there that question was.

a harmless playlist he made for you. a playlist confessing his love and absolute adoration for you that was somehow leaked.

the tears spilt from his eyes and his bottom lip quivered uncontrollably.

"lixie, don't worry," you hummed to him as he curled into you. for both of you, it was an anxious time. but you had to be strong. at least, for him.

"i'm sure everything will work out alright. it always does." you wiped a tear away from his freckled cheek and cupped his face in your hands.

at least he still had you.

seungmin

there was a lover's duet you would sing for each other's ears alone. it was your song. just meant for the two of you.

but you sounded so sweet together. so good that you just had to record the duet together officially. after much persuasion from the other members, you both finally gave in to the thought. and it was beautiful and raw and emotional and everything seungmin could ever dream of in his ideal relationship.

and all of that joy and love was being taken away when someone leaked the duet online.

the speculations started, and seungmin slowly felt like he was sinking. his privacy, his intimate feelings, and his precious thoughts of the one he loved most had all been exposed.

jeongin

it was an accident.

it was such a reckless and unfortunate accident that jeongin could never ever forgive himself for. how many times had he been told to make sure that every picture he posted was perfect? without fault? avoiding any suspicion?

and yet one photo he posted of himself on bubble slid under his eagle-eyed radar. he thought it was harmless, but soon he was being spammed by fans. 'who's that in the reflection of the mirror?' 'who is that person with you jeongin?' 'is there something your not telling us??'

he couldn't breathe. he felt trapped in a helpless abyss of dread. and there was nothing he could do.

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thefrogdalorian · 4 months

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The Best of Both Worlds - Chapter Three

Din Djarin x Female Reader Modern!AU

❁ Series Masterlist ❁ My Masterlist ❁ Read on AO3 ❁

Word Count: 8323 Rating: General Summary: Your internet bestie arrives in preparation for the Star Wars convention you will attend together. Everything is set for the greatest weekend of your life! Until you arrive at the con and find yourself overwhelmed by all the crowds and noise. At least you have numerous incredibly realistic Mando cosplays to distract you from how stressed you feel, and there's one in particular which is uncannily accurate... Content Warnings: Reader struggles to eat due to nerves and feels anxious due to crowds. Also, not sure if it's really a warning, but there's some allusions to fandom discourse in this one, particularly how men in the SW fandom can behave towards women. So warning for fandom wank, I guess, but reader goes off on them ;) Author's Note: A very long update, wow. Honestly, this chapter was semi-autobiographical lmao. It was my exact response to how busy SWC was last year, even down to hiding under the stairs! Except I did not have a cool internet bestie (just my uncool irl bestie), nor did I stand up and speak in a panel like reader does. I did however see many amazing cosplays and the picture of the Din cosplayer is one I took there! :) Hope you like this one. Not sure for how long me updating every two days will last, but my mind is fully focused on this story for the moment, so who knows! Thank you once again to the wonderful @suresnips for being my beta! Couldn't do it without you ♡

3. This Is Why (I Don't Leave The House) [Reader's POV]

You could scarcely believe that the person you had spent so many hours of your life gushing over The Mandalorian with online, was really here with you in your little flat. Ria had arrived a few hours ago and you two had instantly gotten along famously. Somehow, it was as though you had always known her, even though this was the first time you were actually meeting in person.

You had left your flat earlier in the evening with a mix of trepidation in the pit of your stomach and overwhelming excitement crackling like electricity as it coursed through your veins. The prospect of finally meeting someone who meant so much to you was both daunting and exhilarating. There were so many things that could go wrong, since you had never spent any time together in person and were unsure of your dynamic in that sense. There was pressure, too, particularly bearing the distance Ria had travelled from the U.S. in mind, plus the money you had both spent on ForceCon tickets.

It was a big deal for you to invite someone over to your flat to stay with you like this. From morning until evening, the two of you would be in each other’s presence constantly. At least it was only for five nights… Ria was leaving first thing Tuesday morning as you had to get straight back to work. You quieted your nerves with the thought of how brief her visit would be, until a notification lit up your phone and made your stomach drop:

[thisistheslay]: 18:36: I’M HEREEEEEE!!!!

Ria must be here at the station. You searched around frantically for her, trying to spot her amongst all the commuters that were barreling through the station. You realised, then, that you had no idea how tall she was compared to your own height. That was something you had never needed to know online. Finally, you spotted the brown hair and thick black glasses that you instantly recognised as your internet best friend’s, making her way towards the barrier and the incredible weekend of nerdy fun that lay before the two of you.

After approximately five seconds of being in each other’s presence, you knew that all your fears were unfounded.

As Ria had fumbled with her phone to make the contactless payment and make her way through the gates, the way her face had lit up at the sight of you instantly allayed your anxiety. The bone-crushing hug she had pulled you into had helped too, it was hard to believe she was actually here with you. This hug was for all of the hard days you had endured, separated by many miles when the two of you had just wished you could wrap the other in your arms and be there for them.

It struck you how poised Ria was in real life, too. At the end of the day, the two of you shared a pretty nerdy hobby, it would have been understandable if she was quiet and a little nerdy. But here your internet best friend was, pushing her way through the busy rush hour crowds and throwing the death glares of the commuters, mainly old men in suits, who had glared at the two of you for daring to embrace in the middle of the station hall and block their way from making it to the next tube.

It always baffled you to witness how eager people were to push and shove their way through others for the sake of arriving at their destination just two or three minutes earlier. Somewhere along the way, it felt as though a basic human kindness had been lost in how Londoners seemed to interact with each other when it came to public transport.

But that was a gripe for another time. Your best friend was here, you would not let anyone ruin that. As you emerged from the station and onto the street, you found at a loss for what to say, other than asking about her flight. Luckily, Ria filled the gap in conversation by incessantly babbling about her travels here and the shady characters she had encountered during her two layovers, as she chatted all the way back to your flat. All the guilt you had felt at having her make her own way here – you had wanted to meet her at the airport but work had prevented you from getting away on time – vanished as you saw how much confidence she possessed. Her bubbliness was almost overwhelming, you could scarcely get a word in edgeways. But secretly you were glad of it; ordinarily you found that you were a little awkward in the presence of people you had just met as you adjusted to their presence and their energy. Ria more than compensated for your social shortcomings and fortunately, your dynamic appeared as though it would translate from online into the real world.

Ria burst into your flat after you had met her at the station, full of enthusiasm, lighting every corner of your abode with the warmth and humour that had always been present online. It was incredible how much energy she had actually, considering the fact she had just endured a transatlantic flight. You marvelled at her energy levels, considering you felt exhausted after merely going to the shops. It was so amazing to have her here with you, though.

You had laughed before meeting her about how bizarre it was that internet friends always seemed to know the most intimate details about your life, in a way that you never felt comfortable sharing with real life friends… but you had never seen each other’s legs! Yet, now Ria was here, legs and all.

The two of you were inflating the air mattress for Ria to sleep on, keen to get an early night after so much travelling and how early the two of you would need to be up to make your way to the Dockside Convention Centre for the Con the following morning. You positioned the air mattress underneath the TV, on which you had just spent hours watching your favourite episodes of the show that had brought the two of you together. Of course, you had only intended to watch one episode. But with Mando, there was no such thing as only one episode. Once you started, you just couldn’t stop and you had ended up watching most of the second season. Both you and Ria agreed that the second half of it was incredible, but it was a bit of a slow start. Overall the pair of you preferred the first season, which was a pretty popular consensus amongst fans.

Ria had no qualms about her sleeping arrangements. London was an extortionate city at the best of times, but accommodation when ForceCon was in town – especially close to the convention centre – had meant that your offer to allow Ria to stay in your flat was the only way she had been able to afford to come. It was a debt to you that Ria was grateful for. You didn’t see it as any kind of debt though, you knew she would do the same for you.

Plus, there was no way you could not offer to help her. If something as ridiculous as actually encountering Mando happened, she would never be able to forgive you if she was not by your side.

Ria had always been your closest friend since you had first met her online and you were so relieved that there had been no hint of awkwardness between the two of you. Ria had made herself right at home, and you had struggled to believe as the chatter and laughter continued that this was genuinely the first time the two of you had ever met in person.

You watched in awe as Ria moved around your flat, her brown hair which she usually wore in a bob, now tied up ready to sleep. The glasses with thick-black frames were still on her face, a sure sign she would be scrolling on her phone, probably replying to people on her wildly popular blog, before she finally got some sleep.

Now that she had changed into the tank top and shorts that she would sleep in, you could see more of the extensive tattoo collection she possessed, including a few Mandalorian tattoos. There was an outline of Mando’s helmet that was so well-done, it made you want to rush out to the nearest tattoo shop and get one for yourself. You knew there would be tattoo artists at the Con too, but you also knew you would inevitably chicken out.

With her confident nature and collection of tattoos, you were both in awe of, and utterly intimidated by your best friend. You thought, as you watched her climb onto the air mattress with a giggle, as it tossed her around, that Ria seemed so much older than you even though she was actually eighteen months younger! But that was the bizarre thing about being in your mid twenties, people either seemed to be fully formed adults or still more like teenagers. There was rarely any inbetween.

You shouldn’t have been surprised that the two of you had gotten along so well. After all, you and Ria shared a similar sense of humour, had a similar taste in music (that wasn’t the Mandalorian soundtrack) and a love of books that had allowed your friendship to blossom into something more than purely an entirely Mando-centric friendship that you felt like you shared with some of your other online friends. It wasn’t as though the friendships were shallow or that you didn’t get on with them or anything, but you had just not spoken more deeply about other parts of your lives in the same way as you had to Ria.

“How’s the air mattress?” You asked with a smirk as you watched Ria toss and turn as the unpredictable surface tossed her around.

“It’s fine! Just a bit lively but honestly now I’m lay down, it’s super comfortable. I’ll be asleep in no time,” Ria smiled.

“Good,” You nodded. “Still can’t believe you’re really here. I thought about this moment for months but now it’s actually here, it’s surreal,”

“I can’t believe I’m here either. In this flat, which I’ve seen so many times on FaceTime. It feels so weird in the best way!” Ria laughed. “We’re going to have the best time this weekend.”

“We are. It’ll be incredible,” You breathed, trying to contain your excitement so that you would actually be able to get some sleep. The thought of being surrounded by so many fellow Star Wars nerds was electrifying.

“And don’t forget that panel tomorrow, when we finally meet Mando!” Ria exclaimed. “I’m sure he’s going to fall in love with me at first sight.”

“In your dreams, Ria,” You rolled your eyes playfully. “Goodnight, see you bright and early in the morning.”

“Goodnight bestie, I need to get my beauty sleep for Mando,” Ria added with a wink.

You shook your head with a grin on your face as you made your way into your bedroom, still utterly bemused by Ria’s utter conviction that the two of you were somehow going to encounter the man who was sworn to complete secrecy. You kind of admired Ria’s utterly unshakable confidence in the matter, even if it was a little delusional. At the end of the day, though, you knew it was all lighthearted. She wasn’t the type of person to try to hack into CCTV cameras or bribe the doctors and nurses at the hospital where a suspiciously-realistic cosplayer had surprised sick children. Ria loved The Mandalorian a great deal, but she also had other hobbies and interests.

As you tried your best to convince your body that it really needed to sleep before the Con tomorrow, you were struck by how surreal this all felt. Tomorrow, you would travel to what would become, for the next few days, the nerd centre of the world. It was an event that you had dreamt of going to for years, where all of the latest Star Wars projects were announced. Yet, you had never imagined it would be possible to attend, due to how expensive a trip abroad would be. Luckily though, ForceCon travelled around regularly and the stars had aligned to make this possible for you. When it had been announced that the next one would be held in London, you knew you had to do whatever it took to be there.

After almost an entire year of anticipation, you knew that in just a few short hours you would be there, at the event where everyone who was anyone in the Star Wars world and the people who admired them were to be found.

There was just one exception, though. Mando would never get to see how much the fans appreciated him. Keeping his identity a secret meant that he would never be able to feel the amount of love that fans held for him. Your heart constricted as you thought about it. Even though you had tried in vain to convince yourself that you didn’t really care that much about not knowing who he was, you thought it sad that the man, who was so beloved by people young and old, might never know how truly appreciated he was. You just hoped that one day, on his own terms, he would allow himself to feel some of it.

It was a thought that lulled you off into sleep, underneath the large poster of Season One that hung above your single bed.

The familiar sound of the opening theme to The Mandalorian jolted you awake. With its rhythmic drum beat and melodic bass recorder, it was really the perfect alarm. What wasn’t so perfect, however, was the ungodly hour at which it had interrupted the peaceful slumber you were enjoying. You fumbled around, bleary-eyed in the early-morning light as your hand felt around the nightstand to turn it off, frustrated at being awoken. Until you remembered precisely why you were awake at five in the morning.

For a second you lay there and closed your eyes, attempting to compose yourself and stop the fluttering in your stomach as the realisation dawned upon you: It was ForceCon day!

Finally, after months and months of anticipation, you would finally get to have one of the best weekends of your life. The big day was finally here and you and Ria did not want to miss a single second of time there, hence the early start. The venue for the Con, the Dockside Convention Centre, was a considerable distance from the outskirts of the city where you lived in your rented flat, which somehow fell within your budget despite how close it was to the tube station.

The journey to the convention centre was even further than your daily commute to the museum where you worked. The thought of a journey that would take upwards of an hour to start your day, before you had even contended with the crowds at the convention, was slightly distressing to you. But you knew that with Ria by your side, there was no doubt that you would be able to get through it.

Getting up at five meant that you had ample time to get ready for the event. Your outfit was comfortable and practical but still showed your nerdy side. It had been somewhat of a project for you in the run up to the convention, with a denim jacket that you had walked past in a shop window and fell in love with, decorated with various iron-on patches that were a nod to your favourite characters. You coupled it with a comfortable pair of black jeans that weren’t too tight – a must when doing as much walking as you were about to do this weekend – and your trusty favourite pair of shoes.

You wandered into the main room of your flat, quietly watching as Ria sat on the small couch and expertly applied the finishing touches to her make-up. Suddenly, she snapped the handheld mirror shut and turned to face you.

“Are you ready for the greatest weekend of our lives?!” Ria asked enthusiastically.

“Yes… but no… but yes!” You exclaimed, still unsure how to process the rush of emotions that you were feeling about the day ahead.

“Let me just fill my water bottle up and then I’m ready,” Ria said as she jumped up from the couch and grabbed the titanium bottle that was covered with various Star Wars characters.You chuckled at that. Despite how effortlessly cool your friend seemed to most people, even you, it was reassuring to know that at heart, Ria was still a nerd.

After one last check that you both had your passes for the event, you grabbed the backpacks you had carefully packed the previous evening, between episodes of The Mandalorian, and headed out, to where a weekend of nerd heaven awaited.

Waking up so early had meant that the two of you could take your time getting ready and then head out to the convention before the main rush hour began on the tube. Much as you loved your sleep and wanted to feel well-rested, being able to avoid the worst of the crowds was a deeply appealing prospect. Plus, you would have a chance to stop for breakfast closer to the convention hall and eat food that wasn’t horrendously overpriced.

But as you sat there, staring at the sandwich you had ordered and barely taken a few bites of, you seemed to have a mental block when it came to actually finishing the thing. You wanted to, you knew you needed to get some food in your body to give yourself the fuel for contending with the crowds at the convention. Try as you might, though, your mind was not onboard.

“Too nervous?” Ria asked with a knowing smirk as she munched on some fruit.

“I guess,” You shrugged, feeling as though your stomach had tied itself into knots and was attempting to strangle itself.

“You can always bring it with you. We’ll probably have to get in line and wait around for a while before we go inside. Perhaps you’ll feel like eating then,” Ria suggested.

“Yeah, good idea,” You smiled, suddenly feeling immensely relieved that you had someone else here with you. “I don’t know how I’d do this without you, Ria. Thank you.”

The two of you left the cafe with your takeout coffee cups and finally headed towards the convention centre. As you made your way towards the crowds of people, your stomach dropped as you noticed just how busy things were going to be. For the first few hundred feet, things weren’t too bad as you were sent down what appeared to be a wide, service road, built into the side of the convention centre with the masses of people who were all heading in the same direction as you.

You stuck to the side of the walkway, where you could see the roads and city below, and feel the fresh air on your face over the barrier that bordered one side of the walkway. As long as you could still see daylight and the crowds were moving, you were fine. Slightly stressed, but you could cope.

However, the sight that greeted you at the end of the walkway was like something from your worst nightmares. It was your first glimpse inside the packed convention hall, where you had been so certain that you would have the greatest weekend of your life. But if it involved walking into something as stressful as the sight before you, you were not so sure that it would be the incredible experience you had built it up to be in your head.

As far as you could see, in the biggest room you had ever stepped foot in, there was an endless sea of people. The space was enormous and industrial, with a black floor and white sliding doors at the far left end that opened sporadically to let attendees into the main hall. You felt sick as you looked at it, you couldn’t survive more than a few minutes in that space, especially without knowing how long you would be there for. But no one you encountered appeared to have any idea as to how long you would be in this space. You were just glad that you had arrived a little before the doors to the con opened.

You had expected that, given that ForceCon was officially endorsed by Lucasfilm, it would at least be professionally organised. Instead, though, it seemed as though there were a small number of stressed out volunteers responsible for herding the attendees into a series of pens, with no security or leadership in sight. The poor workers looked incredibly stressed and overwhelmed by the influx of people.

“Ria, I don’t know if I can do this.” You mumbled when you noticed the crowd of people that you were being swept towards as the volunteers motioned for you to fill one of the pens. It seemed as though it would never end, as far as your eyes could see there were people. You felt panic rising in your chest, how were you ever going to get out of here?

“Just breathe, bestie. Breathe.” Ria said, placing her hand upon your back soothingly. “This won’t last forever, it’ll all be worth it. Think about the Mando cosplays! Look, there’s one over there!”

But it was no use. Not even the greatest Mandalorian cosplay in the galaxy would be able to comfort you now. Panic was rising in your chest, you felt overwhelmed by being stuck between two metal barriers in a pen full of people.

You tried your best to focus on her words as you took a seat on the cold, hard floor of the hall. The buzzing in your head was back, it grew louder and louder. You shut your eyes and stared at the floor, hands covering your ears as you willed time to go faster.

“Won’t be long now. I promise,” Ria said reassuringly.

How was she always so calm and composed when you felt as though the world was ending over a few people in a room together? It seemed almost unfair. But you knew that Ria would not want you to feel bad, she just wanted to make sure that you were going to be alright.

Mercifully, before too long, the con opened and you eventually began to move out of the enormous room. At that moment, you felt excitement bubbling up in the pit of your stomach as it dawned on you that you were about to enter Star Wars heaven. You glanced for the first time at the various incredible cosplays that surrounded you, in awe of the hours each person had dedicated to their craft.

Any relief you felt was short-lived, though. The main hallway was not much better. You couldn’t move, or stop to think. The crowd continued plodding down the hall towards a destination unknown. You were sure it was the busiest place you had ever been in your entire life.

“Just keep swimming, swimming,” You chanted to yourself under your breath as a way to soothe yourself.

You took deep breaths and concentrated on the rhythmic thudding of your feet as you stared up the ceiling and continued on your way. You instantly felt lighter, the beginnings of a smile traced across your features when you looked up and saw a giant poster of Mando hanging from the ceiling. If you could just make it to him, you would be most of the way down the corridor and then you would almost be at your destination: the main hall.

Focusing on the Mando poster helped and before you knew it, you were there, surrounded by a dizzying variety of stalls selling more Star Wars merch than you had ever seen gathered together in one place in your entire life. You thought you had a pretty impressive collection yourself – having a proper, adult salary had made it easier to give into your whims and purchase a variety of collectibles – but this was really something else.

You were like a kid in a candy shop, mouth open as you wandered from stall to stall, taking in the wares of the various vendors. You felt like Mando the first time he visited Tatooine. He had wandered around just like you were, amazed by the variety of produce on display. Unlike Mando, though, you were unable to get even remotely close to the stalls. There was a throng of people gathered at each one. You were not the least bit assertive in crowds, you had no desire to engage in a battle with your elbows through a gaggle of fellow nerds for some slightly-overpriced collectibles.

“Shall we find somewhere to sit and catch our breath before the panel?” Ria asked, sensing your discomfort. For someone that you had only met face-to-face the previous evening, she was more perceptive than some people who had known you for years.

You headed out of the main hall, desperate to find any relief from the overwhelming noises and sounds that the thousands of people crammed inside the Dockside Convention Centre were currently creating. The first place that you noticed was a staircase. You ducked under the metal bar that surrounded the bottom of it and flopped down unceremoniously on the floor, finally feeling your nerves begin to settle as there was a physical barrier between you and the rest of humanity for the time being. Things suddenly felt a lot quieter and more manageable as the buzzing in your head began to subside. Ria sat opposite you, her blue eyes looking into yours concernedly.

“Ria, I’m sorry I’m such a nervous wreck. It’s just… it’s so much busier than I was expecting.” You admitted.

“Girl, shut up. This place is crazy. Like, the craziest place I have ever been in my entire life. I suffer with this shit too.” Ria admitted. “I think I’m just running on, like, the adrenaline of thinking about Mando being at that panel.”

“Ria, he’s not going to be at the panel!” You laughed. “Please stop being delusional!”

“Sure, there he is right now!” Ria giggled breathlessly as she pointed towards the main hallway, which had emptied somewhat since you had fought your way through it just a few minutes ago.

You had fully intended to make another jibe about Ria being delusional, but when you turned your head, the sight caused all coherent thoughts to leave your brain. You were transfixed at the sight before you. It was as though you had suddenly been transported a long time ago to a galaxy far, far away. The most incredible cosplay you had ever laid eyes upon was heading straight towards you. The armour itself was immaculate, the details on it really looked as if they were forged out of Beskar by a Mandalorian armourer. Of course you knew that screen realistic cosplays existed, you had obviously seen the viral footage of a Mando cosplayer visiting a children’s hospital a few months ago. But it was more than the armour that made your entire world pause on its axis. It was the way this cosplayer carried himself: the self-assured, confident swagger that you would recognise anywhere. The way his hands were held at his side, somewhere between relaxed and tensed, ready to put his finger on the trigger at a moment’s notice. For one brief, fleeting second: you could have sworn that the real Mando was actually walking towards you.

“Wow… that’s…” You stuttered, failing to find words that could capture your feelings towards the sight before you.

“Um, excuse me! I’m the one who gets called delusional and obsessed with Mando, but look at you!” Ria said with a knowing smirk, clearly where words had failed… your face had betrayed you. “You’re getting flustered over a cosplay!”

You couldn’t even deny it. You were feeling more than a little flustered. It was the first time you had ever seen a Mandalorian in real life. Nothing could have prepared you for it, the presence that the man had, even from this distance. Watching the way he carried himself as he had swaggered down the main hallway had been intoxicating to behold. It was also the way with his T-visor, that you never knew exactly where his eyes were trained. They could be right on you or they could be looking right past you, you would never know. As far as you were concerned, he had picked you out from the crowd, his eyes focusing on you and only you as he walked down the hall. It was an electrifying thought, you felt little bolts of electricity all over your skin. You had half a mind to run up to him and beg him to bring you in warm or cold, he could decide, you really weren’t fussy.

“Hellooooooo, bestie!” Ria said sarcastically, waving her hand in front of your eye line, which was still trailed off into the distance where the cosplayer had disappeared into the crowd. “Anyone home?”

“Sorry.” You said, shyly. Now that the Mando cosplay had walked past, you had sadly realised that he was not making a bee-line for you to sweep you off your feet, you felt a little embarrassed. “I just couldn’t stop staring. That was an amazing cosplay.”

“It was. Or maybe… it was really him!” Ria said, throwing her arms like a conspiracy theorist gif that your groupchat had sent one too many times.

You both collapsed into full belly laughter at that. Ria was so devoted to the bit at this point that you just went along with it. You silently called a truce: you would stop calling her delusional, it was a fun joke that had distracted your anxious brain from the throngs of people that surrounded you, just beyond the metal railing of your refuge under the stairs. Despite the distraction, they had not magically disappeared.

“The Mando panel isn’t for a couple hours yet. Is there anything you want to do beforehand?” Ria asked, once the two of you had finally stopped laughing.

“Uh. I don’t know. We could go and have a look around, find where the stages are maybe and then have lunch?” You suggested, not feeling like working your way through the hordes of people by the stalls again.

So Ria and you did exactly that, getting your bearings and orienting yourself in the massive convention hall. There seemed to be so much to see and do, you were so grateful in that moment that you had splurged on four day passes. It would probably take you four days to walk around the entire thing! Your exploration of the centre meant that by the time the panel came around, you were grateful that you would be able to sit down, you were more than ready to rest your tired, achy legs.

As you made your way into the room where the panel would be held, you went out of your way to thank the staff on the door. You knew most of the people who worked here were volunteers and a lot of the panel goers were looking straight through them. Manners cost nothing though, a simple “thanks” and a smile and nod were enough to make someone feel valued when they perhaps felt as though they were doing a thankless task. You couldn’t understand why more people wouldn’t take just two seconds to say thank you.

Your heart was thundering as you took a seat in the hall. For a strange moment, you felt as though you were back in a lecture at University. Everyone sizing each other up, wondering where to sit – should they leave a gap or get close to others, maybe strike up a conversation? Personally, you wanted to place as much distance between yourself and others as humanly possible and the thought of speaking to strangers made you freeze up in terror. But Ria, ever the extrovert, was quite happy to strike up a conversation with the guys next to you.

They were fans of Mando, but you could tell pretty quickly that they were casuals. They did not have the deeper love for the show that you and Ria held. After a few minutes of sitting around, the people who were hosting the panel emerged, walking down the gap between the neatly-arranged chairs to take a seat on the long table that sat on a raised platform so everyone in the room was able to get a good view of them. The room was long but narrow and you and Ria were sitting around 10 rows back. As you glanced behind you, you realised that it had filled up rather quickly. You were glad that you had been here well ahead of the scheduled start time to ensure you got a good seat.

The guys running the panel began messing around with their laptops so they could get the powerpoint they had created on the screen. They were certainly not what you were expecting for this panel. You had expected it to be on a bigger stage, with more fanfare. But it was actually just a small panel hidden away at the back of the convention centre, up a flight of stairs that people might have missed. You had wondered, momentarily, whether you should get up and leave… Yet something was telling you to remain seated and stay. Just because it hadn’t been what you were expecting, didn’t necessarily mean it was going to be a bad thing. The audience seemed to be friendly too, a combination of people who you hoped would ask some thought-provoking questions and wouldn’t turn this all into baseless speculation over who the actor behind Mando really was.

When it got started, though, it soon transpired that this was not going to be the discussion you thought it was. The guys running the panel were sharing their views about Mando as though it was one of the online Star Wars podcasts that you avoided like the plague. There was little room for audience participation. The chair of the panel, a man with a backwards baseball cap on, which was slightly cringeworthy considering he must have been pushing fifty, was called Jeff.

Jeff was very American, thrashing his limbs around exaggeratedly, imitating Mando’s fight style as his voice got quicker and higher pitched in enthusiasm for the tough warrior. Jeff and his colleagues were definitely the kind of people who watched The Mandalorian just to see him fight bad guys and kill them in cool, new ways. Obviously you enjoyed that too, but there was really so much more to the show and the character than just fighting. You wished that they could see that too, especially considering they were running a damn panel about it!

You were so utterly tuned out by their incessant ramblings that you turned your head towards the back of the room to indulge in a bit of people watching. Principally, to see if the two guys on your row that Ria had chatted to before the panel began were as bored as you were. It seemed that even they were utterly uninterested in Jeff and his buddies. You found that your relative boredom was mirrored on the expressions of numerous others in the room who were just as unenthused by Jeff and co’s surface-level analysis of the show you all loved. You felt at that moment that if you and Ria had somehow been able to lead a panel it would have been much more exciting.

You would have actually introduced some nuance and character analysis as the title of the panel had suggested would happen. Ria’s wild theory that this would be the place that Mando would reveal himself to the world had soon gone out of the window, too. Out of all the places in the world that he could choose (or not) to finally reveal his identity, a room tucked away in the far corner of the Dockside Convention Centre did not seem the most likely.

But your stomach dropped in the familiar way that it had when you were crouched underneath the staircase, catching your breath after the bedlam of entering the Con.

It was him.

The same cosplayer was back.

He was sitting on the last seat in the row, two rows behind and opposite you, perfectly straight with his shoulders back, hands resting on his knees. It was almost uncanny, the way he held himself… it was so much like the way you had witnessed Mando sit so many times on the show. When he visited cantinas or sat in his ship, Mando held himself in an uncannily similar position.

You shook your head, mentally telling yourself to snap out of it – you were being ridiculous! If Ria was thinking these thoughts, you would tell her to stop being crazy. You were usually the grounded, rational one. For even you to be getting caught up in such delusional thinking, well that was truly concerning. Perhaps it was thanks to the early start and crowds. Either way, it seemed as though you were really losing it.

You blamed it on Mando, all logical thought went straight out of your brain when it came to him. Of course the best Mando cosplayers would be here at this con. It wasn’t really him, but it sure was uncanny how realistic both the cosplay and way he sat was. Extremely uncanny. You didn’t have time to dwell on it, though… because Jeff was asking a question to the audience. One that you were keen to answer honestly and defend the character that you loved so much, with as much ferocity as if he was really listening to your every word.

“So, finally, we wanted to leave a few minutes for discussion about what the character of Mando means to all of you, here. You must be pretty big fans of the show to have found us all the way back up here!” Jeff joked, to a few laughs from the room.

You had gotten the sense since you had walked into this panel that Jeff and his buddies viewed everyone here with a baseline level of contempt. It was something that you couldn’t quite place your finger on, but you felt as though if a person did not entirely agree with his point of view, then he was not impressed by them.It was a shame, really, you loved hearing the opinions of others. Even if you didn’t agree with them, you always found out something new about yourself.

Jeff had only just finished speaking, and already there was a steady stream of people flocking to queue at the microphone positioned in the aisle. There was nothing on earth that could motivate you to go up there, so you sat, with your arms folded, and leaned back into your chair. This would all be over in a few minutes. Then there would be a hopefully much more interesting panel about historical parallels with Star Wars, something you were truly interested in, that you wanted to check out with Ria.

The first few audience comments were pretty dull. You disagreed with all of them almost entirely as they again reduced the concept of understanding a character to things such as seeing a face and knowing a name. Jeff just responded hollowly, thanking the speakers for their thoughts. But it did not provoke any deeper discussions like you had been hoping for.

That was certainly a disappointment, but it was not a reason for you to lose your temper. You just felt slightly numb to the whole experience, wishing it was over as soon as possible and already plotting your route to the next panel. It was dull, but inoffensive.

That was, until the next two speakers boiled your blood with their assumptions and cruel jibes.

“When I first started watching The Mandalorian I loved it. I really thought Star Wars was back!” A man in a Darth Vader hoodie, who was probably in his late thirties, said proudly as he echoed the empty talking points that you had heard over and over since The Mandalorian premiered. You scoffed and rolled your eyes. This guy was clearly someone who thought that Star Wars was all bad now. He probably bought into all the theories that his precious sci-fi franchise had been ruined by women. He continued his tirade: “But now, it’s just the same thing every week. A hollow, emotionless tin can man strutting around from planet to planet, taking guys out. Like, it was cool the first few times but it’s just getting boring now. We need to see his face!”

Your blood was slowly boiling as you heard all of these hollow criticisms of the show you loved so much. It truly upset you that a place you had believed would be full of fellow fans who would be eager to enthuse about the show alongside you and Ria had been nothing of the sort. Instead of the welcoming, open-minded environment you had expected, things had been wildly different, as the next speaker was about to prove once again.

The next man who spoke had long brown hair. He was dressed in a Mando t-shirt and jeans.

“I mean, don’t get me wrong, I love the show and all. But I just feel like we don’t know that much about Mando. It’s as if we, as an audience, are being held back from connecting with him fully because of some diva’s selfish demands to keep his identity hidden!” The man exclaimed. Several people laughed and applauded. He was probably around your age but it stunned you how drastically different your opinions on the show could be. Perhaps he spent his time online in different circles than you. In fact, you were almost certain that you had seen these conspiracy theories about Mando’s actor pushed by people who swore it as the gospel truth, even though there was absolutely no proof of it. But he was not done yet, levelling a final cruel jab at the actor who played Mando: “Seriously, the guy who plays him must be such an asshole. Imagine having to work with that guy!”

Your head was burning… that was too much. Once people got personal about the actor too, that did it for you. It was one thing to criticise the show, but to level insults towards the person behind the character, who clearly did not want his business in the public eye, was enough to compel you to speak up.

Before you really knew what you were doing, you had somehow risen from your seat, stumbled over a few bags and outstretched legs and now stood in front of the microphone. Jeff looked at you expectantly, the eyes of everyone in the room were on you. Suddenly the gravity of what you were about to do had dawned on you, you felt your pulse thundering in your ears. But then you remembered what the previous guy had said about Mando, and you opened your mouth to launch into a passionate defence of your favourite fictional character of all time.

“I think tying Mando’s identity to his name and face is a pretty narrow way of viewing how we can understand who someone truly is inside and what exactly motivates them. I mean, I think I’ve connected to his character pretty well without ever seeing his face or knowing his real name. That’s because Mando has proved time and time again what kind of man he is. The way he has risked his life multiple times to rid the galaxy of threats and evil shows that he is committed to securing a brighter future, even if he is not around to see it. This man is willing to sacrifice himself for the greater good. Sure, we don’t know his name or face or a lot about his origins, but I think to us, that should prove that he has nothing but noble intentions. That human side of the man beneath all of the armour allows us to connect to him on a far deeper level than just seeing a face and learning a name ever could.”

Jeff began to thank you for your thoughts, using the same hollow phrases that he had used for every previous speaker, but you were not done yet. For the reason you had stood up to speak was not only motivated by the way people had spoken about Mando, the character. It was not just accusations against the fictional man that you were here to refute, but also the way that they had tried to turn on the man beneath the Beskar.

“Also, I know no one outside this room will probably ever hear what had been said at this panel, but I think attacking the character of the man who portrays Mando, simply because he wants privacy, is unfair. I think we should always talk about people, online and publicly, as though they can read or hear what we say. We don’t know why he won’t say who he is, but I trust that he has his reasons. Even then, he doesn’t need to have a good reason,” You argued passionately, noticing how the trembling in your voice had ceased the more you spoke. “Everyone is entitled to their privacy for the simple fact of wanting to be private. I just think that we see Mando go from planet to planet, connecting with locals and communicating with them respectfully. He leaves every place better than he found it… I wish more people would take those lessons from the show, too, rather than how skilled Mando is at fighting and killing,” You made a pointed effort to look straight at Jeff as you made that last quip about his fighting skills, but he just stayed slumped in his seat, hand resting under his chin, looking utterly bored. Your words had done nothing to get through to him.

You walked back to your seat, head down, trembling. Speaking that much in public had been a lot more than you would ever have expected yourself to be able to handle. Ria was staring at you dumbfounded, her mouth open in shock.

“Who are you and what have you done with my best friend?” Ria asked, astonished.

“I… uh….” You stuttered.

“Look, I knew you loved Mando, but that was insane!” Ria whispered excitedly, while beaming at you. “You defended him as if he was a real person, like he was actually here in the room! That was awesome, beyond badass! He’d be so proud of you, bestie.”

“Thank you.” You whispered, face suddenly feeling hot. You were sure you were visibly shaking after your public outburst. But it had been worth it, you had meant every word.

A few more people offered their thoughts but your head was still buzzing with the emotional exertion of public speaking, so you did not pay them much mind, even if they still repeated the same old tired arguments about Mando that you had just tried to argue against.

Finally, Jeff drew things to a close and then it was time for everyone to leave. He had invited people to come and speak to him at the front after the panel if they wished to, but you were definitely not going to be taking him up on that offer. You had believed that anyone given such an incredible opportunity to speak about something they loved at an event as prestigious as ForceCon would be nothing less than delighted. But clearly, you were mistaken. Jeff had seemed utterly bored throughout the panel, not least when people he did not agree with had spoken. You were not a fan of him and his backwards baseball cap in the slightest.

As the panel ended and people began to filter out, you glanced around to where the incredible cosplayer had been sitting. But it seemed that while you had been distracted by your emotional state after speaking so publicly, he had already made his way out. You were disappointed, you wanted to compliment him on his cosplay and maybe even get a picture with him.

Just being in his presence twice had been intoxicating, you had been unable to look away from him. When you saw him, it really felt like you were actually in the world of The Mandalorian. You had a strong desire to be near him again, but you were too late. The man was apparently long gone. But you didn’t want to dwell on that and ruin the rest of your experience. You still had three more days here. So it was time to get over your disappointment, even though you were still kicking yourself for not pointing him out to Ria.

As you made your way down to the main hall of the convention centre, you couldn’t help but feel your chest swell with pride when you remembered how you had spoken in such a surprisingly eloquent manner at the panel. It had really been so many steps out of your comfort zone, but you had proved to yourself that you could do it. This entire weekend, really, was out of your comfort zone. But so far, you were matching every hurdle before you.

Perhaps speaking up at the panel would be the start of a new, more confident you. A you that was unafraid to stand up for what she believed in.

But then, the idea of a simple panel at a sci-fi convention being some sort of life changing experience was surely an absurd notion.

Wasn’t it?

Next Chapter

Taglist: @toxic-seduction

#my fics #tbobw #din djarin fanfic #din djarin x reader #din djarin x you #the mandalorian x reader #din djarin fanfiction #mando x reader #mando x you #the mandalorian fanfiction #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfiction #i am also titling chapters now lmao this one was a paramore song

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strayheartless · 4 months

Text

Okay let’s torture Zack today: ADHD PARALYSIS STYLE!

Getoutlfbedgetoutofbedgetoutofbedgetoutofbedgetupgetupgetupgetuplazazylazazylazy-

This has been going on for too long now. Why can’t he just get up, huh? Why does this have to be a fight every fucking time? Just get the fuck up dude!

He doesn’t move. Instead his thumb shifts to scroll past another video. He knows Angeals about to bang on the door and demand to know why he’s not out of bed; he knows it’s going to spark a lecture, and he knows his brain is going to feel like it’s been lit up like a firework just hearing anything other than silence. He’s not doing it on purpose. He knows he needs to move.

There’s a knock at the door, and that gets him moving. It doesn’t sound like Angeals knock, it’s too hesitant. Also nobody has walked in which means they don’t have a key…

He opens the door to Cloud who’s standing there looking a little unsure. “You good?” He gives Zack a once over, closing off a little at whatever he finds, pulling his scarf over his mouth in nervous habit.

“Yeah I’m fine why?” Zack blinks. What did he forget?

“We er, we were going to meet for lunch.” Cloud looked away from him, and Zack feels like a grade A asshole. “It’s okay if you changed your mind, it’s just- a text- I mean… a text would have- it’s fine.”

“Cloud I’m so sorry!” He cried trying to stumble around looking for clean cloths from the pile of washing that’s mixed with the dirty laundry on the chair. “I completely lost track. I’m- I- I’m reall-“

He hadn’t realised he’d started crying until Cloud makes him stop with a hand on his arm, and he takes a huge stuttering breath. Why does he keep doing this!? Why does he keep forgetting these things and then upsetting his best friend!

“Zack breath,” Cloud says, kind of commands actually.Zack stops and focuses a little more on taking some breaths.

“Good, that’s good. Just… did you forget or did that thing happen again?” Cloud asks and Zack holds up two fingers to indicate option 2.

“Okay,” Cloud sighs and tries a little smile that he only ever seems to give to Zack. “Okay, that’s fine. I’m sorry I shouldn’t have put that pressure on you. Do you want to eat here, or do you think you need to get moving to kickstart something?”

Zack took another breath and struttered “m-moving.”

“Okay, I’ll leave you to get dressed then. 300 second okay?”

“Okay.”

Once Cloud closes his door again Zack moves around the room like lightning. He shoves on a shirt that smells clean, does his belt, grabs his phone and wallet and shoves his feet in his shoes.

Outside Clouds holding Zack’s coat out already and helps him into it.

“283 seconds. New record.” He bumps his elbow into Zack’s side lightly, making the other man laugh breathily.

“Cloud I really am so-“

“Don’t. I know you are and you don’t have to apologise. I get that it’s hard for you.” Cloud cuts him off.

Zack just looks at him. How can one person hold so much acceptance in one tiny body? How can somebody who’s known him for no more than a year accept and help him in ways not even his parents could.

Cloud never makes Zack feel bad for this. he never gets mad at him, when he has every right to. All Cloud has ever done is occasionally been insecure himself and even then he changes his approach when Zack explains.

“I really love you, you know that right?” He asks, wrapping his arms around Cloud. “Like, a lot,”

Cloud blushes “shut up,” he says, leaning into the side hug.

He doesn’t say it back, but he doesn’t have to. Zack knows Cloud loves him to and that makes all the difference in the world.

#oh oops this was meant to be angst #oh well #here have some fluff #ffvii #cloud strife #zack fair #crisis core #zakkura #implied zakkura #can be read as platonic if you like

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dreamcubed · 2 years

Text

masterlist

[<- return to navi.]

welcome to the library!

- use any pronouns for me, i am a mere entity

- proper grammar is used in the actual fics

- all fics are character x reader

- click here for my lover anthology of oneshots

- click here for my reputation anthology of oneshots

| continue scrolling for my full masterlist, sorted by character |

Golden Trio’s Gen;

harry potter;

i forgot that you existed (ex-lovers)

summary; it’s quite difficult to forget your ex when he’s the infamous boy who lived, but somehow, some way, you were finally getting there

daylight (s2l)

summary; after providing for yourself and your two sons alone for so long, you were foreign to the concept of help, and the last person you expected to receive it from was the infamous boy who lived

george weasley;

cigarette daydreams (forbidden love)

summary; george didn't expect to meet the ghost of a hufflepuff descendant when he went for a walk one night, and he certainly didn't expect to learn a truly tragic life story of someone long forgotten, either

girls on film (forced proximity)

summary; in an attempt to connect more to the muggle world, hogwarts started a broadcasting club, which looked to be a massive aid in you finding more about your best friend’s crush for her. only, you didn’t expect to find a crush of your own along the way

soon you’ll get better (established relationship)

summary; george was a broken man after the untimely death of his built-in best friend, and as his lover you were at a loss of how to help his grief

me! (accidental marriage)

summary; after waking up in bed with a red-haired stranger and no memories of the night prior, you run off as quickly as you can. it isn't until months later when you're trying to buy a house that you learn that you can't just leave that forgotten night in the past

fred weasley;

death by a thousand cuts (ex2l)

summary; past relationships were meant to stay in the past, hence the name. however, it soon became clear that fred weasley wanted you back, and was willing to do whatever it took to fight for your love

end game (established relationship)

summary; all the times you and fred joked around in ways that reflected your prankster reputation, and the one time you had to be serious

london boy (s2l)

summary; after taking the plunge and moving across the world, you are unsure of how to form a new social circle and support system. it appears there was no need to worry, as you soon meet a charming man who runs a joke shop with his twin brother

enchanted (s2l)

summary; maybe volunteering to sing at the yule ball would mean that your crush would finally notice you, and maybe you could have a wonderfully enchanting night as a result

ron weasley;

dress (bff2l)

summary; why couldn’t your best friend of over three years realise that you saw him as so much more than that? maybe he just needed a glaring sign, and there was no better opportunity for that than the yule ball

oliver wood;

more than a woman (s2l) || one | two ||

summary; y/n was one of many who fancied the obsessive quidditch boy, and to her surprise, she was of interest to him as well

afterglow (ex2l)

summary; during your relationship with oliver, your friend groups fused to form one - so, when you broke up over a deemed “petty reason” and refused to go anywhere near each other, your friends decided to do something to fix the “split custody” situation they had found themselves in

draco malfoy;

don’t blame me (s2l)

summary; y/n was surprised to find herself relating to the family pressures draco malfoy faced, and it soon opened up the question of... would their bond help them fight back and choose the good side, or will they both be too weak to not give in?

cruel summer (forbidden love)

summary; their relationship was never meant to be, and y/n knew that, but a part of them hoped that draco would be willing to fight for them and their love in the face of familial expectations

call it what you want (forbidden love)

summary; his entire life, draco had it drilled into him that anything to do with muggles was bad- impure, even. but after his father is imprisoned for life, he decides to venture into the muggle world- just as a temporary thing, of course

lee jordan;

drug dealer (s2l)

summary; if anyone thought hogwarts students didn't have means to get weed, they were wrong - it was a widely used drug within the castle, and y/n was a new customer to the resident drug dealer

pansy parkinson;

this is why we can’t have nice things (break-up)

summary; you had already given pansy a second chance, but she really had proven that she couldn’t be trusted, and that your relationship had to be ended for good

mattheo riddle;

king of my heart (arranged marriage)

summary; your refusal of marriage led your father to relinquish permission for you to choose your own husband, allowing him to make the decision himself and ensure the most status and wealth possible. the problem? the man he chose for you was closed off and arrogant

lover (marriage of convenience)

summary; born into a loveless family, you had been denied the opportunity to marry for many years. that was, until, a duke noticed your situation and gave your parents an offer that they simply couldn't refuse - but would it be a love match?

i don’t wanna live forever (ex2l) [18+]

summary; ever since you began dating, you and mattheo had been a fiery and toxic mess of breaking up and getting back together - only, when you finally try and date someone else, you realise that you miss and crave the unhealthy pattern that came with mattheo riddle

…ready for it? (fake dating) [18+] - NEW

summary; following the war, mattheo is suffocated by the association with his father, and decides there is only one way to make people see that he is nothing like him. you, on the other hand, want to prove to people that, in the year you’ve been in hiding, you have changed from the naïve goody-two-shoes you

so it goes… (s2l) - coming soon

summary; the first muggle at hogwarts, courtesy of very special circumstances— how would you fare?

theodore nott;

delicate (s2l)

summary; when your childhood friend daphne decides to drag you out to her family’s californian beach house with her slytherin friends during the summer holidays, you are reluctant to come out of your carefully crafted shell. and then, out of nowhere, you find yourself relating to the quietest boy on the trip

i think he knows (not actually unrequited love)

summary; you had fancied the mysteriously quiet slytherin boy for as long as you could remember (since first year), and, quite frankly, your best friend was sick of you going on about it without ever making a move

you need to calm down (e2l) [18+] - NEW

summary; after returning to hogwarts for a subsidiary 8th year to make up for the loss of 7th year due to the war, you are a completely different person, and muggle-born-hating theo finds himself obsessed with you

cornelia street (s2l) - coming soon

summary; elusive and unknown, you slunk along the walls of hogwarts without ever being noticed. that was, until, a boy who everybody knew spotted you

fleur delacour;

gorgeous (s2l)

summary; you, like everyone else, were drawn to the part-veela fleur delacour when beauxbatons visited, only she thought that you hated her because you made it your mission to avoid her

blaise zabini;

false god (arranged marriage)

summary; you had been betrothed to blaise zabini practically your whole life, and while you moved in the same friend group, he had always avoided you. you tried to understand, you really did, but were you really so undesirable?

lorenzo berkshire;

the archer (s2l) - NEW

summary; lorenzo's cat hates everybody but you

[more to be added when fics are written]

Marauders’ Gen;

remus lupin;

girls like me (soulmates)

summary; after becoming a werewolf over the summer holidays, y/n returns to find that remus lupin, a famous marauder, has an air of attraction around him that she never noticed before

new year’s day (s2l)

summary; after a troubling christmas with your not-so-nice family, you hurriedly make your leave on boxing day without checking the weather. and, after a whirlwind series of events, you find yourself snowed in with a mysterious stranger

james potter;

the man (fwb2l) [16+]

summary; you hated it. james could go around sleeping with as many different people as he liked and get praised for it, while you did the exact same and only ever got slut-shamed. the worst part? james didn’t seem to understand that, despite being your most frequent fling

sirius black;

miss americana & the heartbreak prince (s2l)

summary; after making an impromptu transfer from ilvermorny to hogwarts, you are thrust into a world of british boys and pranks - with one in particular catching your eye

regulus black;

back to black (s2l)

summary; autumn was your favourite season of all time, and not even your lack of parents or friendships could ruin it for you. but, maybe a brooding boy in your year could

[more to be added when fics are written]

Other Gens;

tom riddle;

the loch ness monster (ex-lovers)

summary; y/n had watched their lover become a despicable man capable of no good, and it pained them that he still had a hold over them

she’s my collar (soulmates)

summary; most people were destined to never find the person who was born with a matching tattoo to theirs - you weren’t one of those people, but you were forced to endure your soulmate creating horcruxes and the effect it had on your soul

i did something bad (s2l)

summary; an orphaned boy with sinister plans for the future, and a new girl who is about to discover she may be just as bad as her parents. what happens when they meet?

[more to be added when fics are written]

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lovejosephquinn · 1 year

Text

I woke up with an idea with sudden inspiration for a new mini series. (I love when that happens.) Depending on what you all think, there will be a part 2 and I'm excited to see how this turns out. This part is purely to set the scene.

Summary: You're marrying a man for an easy life, yet you're so in love with your best friend it hurts. What would happen if everything changed drastically between the two of you before you were due to be wed?

Under 18's DNI. Warnings: Angst, slow burning frustration, friends to nothing or friends to lovers? Word Count: 2.5k

Part 1 ✨ Part 2 ✨Part 3 ✨Part 4 ✨ Part 5

The preparations were complete, you were set to marry a man that you weren't sure that you loved yet just accepted it based on the fact that your parents approved and everything was taken care of, all for an easy life, you went along with it. The start was great, but the more you thought about it; was he really the one? He was a man that was from a well off family, someone who would provide and look after you for the rest of your life, but is forever long enough to be with someone when you're not as happy as you could be?

There was always a burning thought in the back of your head of what if? You'd always loved your best friend, since a very young age, but it was always the wrong time to get into what felt such a crime. You'd always admired one another from the side lines, your friendship meaning way too much for your own liking to ever do anything about it. Prom night was the only exception.

You spent a night together, losing your virginity to each other after the consumption of alcohol at the after party, it was awkward yet beautiful, a moment shared and a moment cherished. You'd never spoke of it again after that, both of you too shy to admit that there was something there that had clear been around for quite some time, burning and eager to get out of your systems, so you went about your teenage lives, getting into other relationships, supporting each other when times got tough, doing the general best friend thing and being around when the other needed it most.

Entering your twenties was a crucial stage and the jealousy became worse every time you had to witness him with somebody else, but you still remained quiet, as close to him as you were you always longed for more but it just seemed like it was never to be.

Then you met the man you were with today, a brief meeting at a family event where several people attended including a lot of friends of the family which extended into hundreds of people being at the venue. You were happy at first, or so you thought but it always came back down to your best friend and every waking moment you spent with your new beau, the more you'd wish that he was him. Nobody had ever been good enough and that was the mistake you'd made all along.

The moment you realised that your best friend loved you just as much right back was your 29th birthday party, your boyfriend proposed to you that night in front of the entire crowd, up on a large stage with a beautiful serenading quartet and a large screen filled with images of the two of you over the last couple of years, you'd turned around to see your now fiancé down on one knee.

The pressure forced you to say yes, but when you looked back into crowd of people, all eyes were on you but you noticed one particularly pair of burning, crushed retinas. Joe. Your best friend for almost all of your life was the one stood there with a pressed line to his lips, you could almost see the single tear that dropped from his bottom lid, he took a deep sigh, parted lips and enforced a fake smile of his own to try and be happy for you. He of course joined in the applause but with a sense of laziness from the broken heart that had now smashed to smithereens to see you betrothed to another.

Time stood still, the ring slipped onto your wedding finger but your gaze still fell upon that of your best friends, you took a large gulp and your sights matched upon the one he was still indistinctively pulling. You should've been happy, you should've been jumping for joy that you were engaged to the person you'd been with for the last two and a half years, but better still it just wasn't the one you'd hoped for.

The speed of sound caught back up with you, up roars of cheers found you looking over to your parents who were hugging in utter joy for the announcement that their daughter was to be married, but they just didn't understand, purely because they didn't know how you truly felt. But would they ever understand? Your mum was married to your dad for exactly the same reason, but she accepted it and over time she fell in love, she'd never admitted that to you personally, but you'd read her diaries from a long time ago that you'd found as a kid so you were well aware of the situation.

Truth be told you were hoping that getting over Joe in time would work and it'd slowly fade away. You were crazy to believe such a thing because that would of happened years ago if it were supposed to, turning back to your now fiancé was the hardest thing you'd ever had to do, kissing him, showing the party that you were elated to be in such a position; yet you were so repulsed you almost showed it.

Every flashback remained of Joe, every time you'd hugged, every time you'd shared yours or his bed in an innocent way, every time he'd made you laugh and the one time you'd had sex, it was sloppy but the kissing was something out of a fairy tale, it was saved in your padlocked memory and to your upset that's where it would remain and wouldn't ever become a reality again.

You'd mingled with every other person, being smothered by such congratulations that it almost hurt to breathe, you needed to get out for a second, give yourself some you time, be by yourself and allow your thoughts to rekindle themselves before you went back into that hell hole again. You breathed in the winter air, tilting your head toward the night sky, reaching back into your bag and pulling out a cigarette and putting it to your lips, ruffling to find your lighter, stressed and uttering profanities under your breath because you couldn't find it. A voice interrupted you suddenly making you turn around in a startle.

"Need a light?" Joe.

"Lifesaver." You let out an almost desperate smile, glad for the lighter Joe hovered in front of your vision, but secretly excited to have him close to you, alone and without any other creeping eyes.

He lit your cigarette and pulled out one of his own to join you, you walked over to the set of swings of a little playground situated next to the hall and he followed you like a lost sheep, you were glad he'd taken the silent hint to stick around.

You leaned your cheek against the ice touch of the chains of the swing set, closing your eyes as you took a drag of your cigarette, releasing the smoke out of your nose, breaking the silence you heard the crushing words of congratulations come out of the mouth you didn't entirely want to hear.

"So you're engaged now, congratulations are in order I guess princess." You pushed the swing to the side to nudge his arm, not even taking a second glance as you both stared to the ground.

"Thanks love." You swallowed your regret.

Joe had always called you princess, since you were from an entirely wealthy family yourself, he meant it as you were royalty, the untouchable as he'd relayed to you a few times throughout your friendship, something that both pulled at your heart strings and also made you want to punch his lights out. You'd had no choice but to accept the nickname because he'd refused to not call you anything but. Surely it couldn't have had a deeper meaning, especially now you had the incline that he felt the exact way you did. Joe was an exceptional actor so he could've been putting on the whole façade, yet he was letting this one slip quite badly.

"Everything's changing fast, I don't like it." Joe let out without even a thought.

"What do you mean?" You finally looked over to your best friend, anxious on his delayed response. You watched him throw the last of his cigarette, palms slapped to rub together, trying to work out what his emotions were actually to mean, the whole switch of mood was hard to figure out.

"My best girl's engaged, it's all worked out for you. I'm so happy about that, but I can't help to feel like somethings missing." A hitch of his throat saw you almost ready to vomit the words back out of your mouth, he loved you, like really loved you, you were sure. Then why were you so dumb founded towards it for all this time, why was it so subtly obvious now?

"Quit swerving around the real answer Quinn, tell me." You felt like getting serious was the only thing you had left. Honesty was all you needed and then you could make a decision.

"That's the real answer, somethings missing." He said lowly.

"But what's missing?" You furrowed your brow.

"Your true happiness. I saw the way you looked over at me." Was this supposed to be a joke? A role reversal to the way Joe had actually looked at you the second your fiancé got down onto one knee.

"You mean the way you looked at me?" That made Joe instantly swerve to glance at you, his eyes burning something dark, something yearning inside of the chocolatey gaze which screamed that he felt upset by the entire ordeal.

"Yeah, like that." You folded your arms, your blood beginning to boil, no room to simmer. Why couldn't he just speak the truth? It would make it so much easier for you to then break your walls down to your own feelings and shout them out loud and clear for him to hear.

"Don't know what you're talking about princess." There it was, the whole performance about to begin, his acting senses creeping out of him, keeping in the reality and bringing out the fictional.

"Stop calling me that." You raised your voice, your whole head was full and you were screaming inside, you just wanted to shake your best friend, make him say it, force him, but you knew you couldn't and that's what hurt so bad, for if you were wrong about everything then you'd look quite the idiot.

"I'm sorry, I just don't know if I can be a part of this, a part of something I don't support."

"A part of what, my life?" You'd totally done it, you'd thrown the baton back at him, you weren't being verbally abused, you weren't willing to be crushed through your regret of agreeing to marry someone that you weren't sure about.

"Not your life, your life with him, I can't be around to see you unhappy." He knew you too well that was all well and good, but you were seething to see what he was saying was true, maybe him not being around would help you out in your journey to get over Joe, but you knew deep down you weren't willing to even entertain the thought.

"I'm happy."

"Fuck right off." His own voice raised right back.

"Fine I will." You huffed a violent sigh. Getting up off of the swing, all ready to walk away from the situation when you were pulled back by the freezing touch of bare skin, Joe's hand gripped to yours like his life depended on it. It's like the world stopped right there, the touch confirmed it all. Your lips parted together, you were caged between his legs to where he'd dragged you back, almost stumbling but saved by his stiffened body, now your hand captured in the palm of his, you'd not felt this close to the one person you truly felt for in such a long time.

"I didn't mean it literally."

"Then what did you mean Joe?" You licked your dry lips and Joe stared at the way your tongue moved in slow motion, you'd be blind not to have noticed the way his eyes lingered for a second.

"Don't lose yourself to him is all I'm saying." Where's the god damn love confession? You'd heard just about enough for one night.

"We done here?" You closed your mouth and gritted your teeth.

"Congratulations again and uh, happy birthday." Joe stood up, tall yet slumped in front of you, with a stroke of the back of your hand from his thumb, he let go and walked towards the exit of the venue, over the hill and to the car park to leave.

You called out his name so clearly, but he didn't turn back around he just disappeared from the lighting and into the darkness of the night. This whole loving your best friend was so fucked and now you were in the worst situation of all, swallowed into a world of your own loneliness, lost without Joe by your side once again. You were damned if you did and damned if you didn't run after him, but you couldn't. The ring on your finger, a sacred anchor that weighed you down and just wouldn't allow it.

Slumping back onto the swing Joe sat on previously, your tears flowed out softly, was there something you could've said that would of allowed the truth to come out? Or was it destined to be kept in for the rest of your life. You felt worthless on what was supposed to be the best night of your life so far. There's a saying of time heals all wounds, but this was one that would just scar, remain and kill you slowly if something wasn't done about it.

#joseph quinn fluff #joseph quinn angst #joseph quinn fanfiction #joseph quinn imagine #joseph quinn x reader

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itsfeckinwimdy · 2 years

Text

Arm - Max Verstappen

Max Verstappen x Reader

Reader Pronouns: She/Her

Prompt: after holding their hand, the sender releases the receiver, but slowly glides their hand up the full length of their arm, lingering on the upper arm, then the shoulder, then resting their touch against the side of their neck.

Word Count: 0.8k (830 words)

Formula 1 Masterlist

Published: 28/06/2022

The brightly lit room in the FIA building was unnerving.

Hospitals. Hospital lighting that glares down at you. That bright fluorescent light capable of haunting your dreams or of putting a wide-awake child to sleep within minutes. The horrible lighting of death. That was what the room reminded her of.

The eighteen drivers had piled their way into the room almost an hour ago now, the young Schumacher unable to attend after his crash and Sebastian Vettel had obtained Covid. Thankfully the younger German was fine and nothing worse had happened to him or else she didn’t know how she would cope.

The adrenaline junkie children had all come to the same conclusion within twenty minutes of them all discussing the topic at hand. None of them wanted to continue with the race here this weekend. Would they get listened to though? Fuck no.

The following hour passed slowly as she tried to keep herself occupied and not sink into the waves building up in her chest threatening to pull her under.

More people entered to room. Team principles. Bosses. Head of departments. FIA staff members.

Her eyes flittered around the room as she searched for faces she knew, the floor of the steps beneath her now feeling scratchy and course to the skin. Her body temperature began to rise, the red bull shirt feeling uncomfortable, the mask on her face too restricting. She clenched her fists, her bitten nails only providing pressure to the center of her palms rather than ripping open the flesh.

Everything was too much.

She didn’t want to be here.

She didn’t want to race this weekend.

It’s too hot.

There's too much.

She wants out.

There's too much in the room.

Mick’s not here.

Where's Max?

Why.

Just leave.

Her head dropped down as she wrapped her arms around her torso, her leg starting to bounce without her realising. She was crying. Why was she crying? No, stop crying.

She tried to control her breathing which only caused her to panic more.

Max had been deep in conversation with Charles and Lando as he took another sip of his Redbull. He was bored of waiting for this meeting to come to an end and all he wanted was to sleep in the surprisingly comfy hotel bed next to his partner ready for the race tomorrow.

He looked up and around the room to see where she was, or if she had moved from where they were sat before he'd been forcibly dragged away by the Monegasque lad. His eyes landed on her and upon switching his attention away from the conversation, slight panic filled him.

Max immediately made his way over to her, pushing past people in his way, not caring if he was being rude. It didn't matter to him at that moment and being honest, wouldn't matter to him later. All that did, was getting to her.

He crouched down in front of her, his right knee clicking in the process. That wasn't something he focused on, probably just a build-up of pressure from him being stood up to long. She was more important at this moment.

Not just this moment, every moment.

"Schatje," He began, attempting to get her attention without touching her, "It's me."

His eyebrows creased as he noticed her rapid breathing pace and the tears falling freely from her eyes, "Schatje, I need you to breathe with me okay?

"In," he spoke counting to four in his mind, "An out. Keep doing that for me, okay?"

He slowly reached a hand forward and gently placed it on hers, waiting for her to turn her own over to hold his before he made another move, all the while talking her through breathing. He knew what he was doing, how to help her. At the same time a part of him wished she didn't have to suffer through anxiety attacks, he was determined to learn every way to help her.

As time passed, her breathing evened out, and her hand which she ended up turning and clasping Max's with, loosened from the tight grip she enforced on it. Her mask was damp and stained with tears so she was now focused on changing it. It was better she drew her attention to that and Max, rather than the accumulation of stares the fellow drivers had on her. They just wanted to see if she was okay.

Max gently removed his hand from hers, causing her eyes to focus on his movements. His hand dragged up her forearm, his touch gentle as he reached her bicep, pausing to see if she was uncomfortable. Seeing her make no move to push him away, he continued his hand's movements, his hand coming to a stop against her neck.

Closing her eyes she leant forward and rested her forehead against his. No more words were spoken as they ignored everything happening around them. Just the two of them present in their little bubble.

#max verstappen x reader #max verstappen imagine #max verstappen fanfic #max verstappen fluff #type: romantic #pronouns: she/her #fic: drabble/imagine #f1 x reader #f1 imagine #formula 1 x reader #formula 1 imagine #formula one x reader #formula one im #tree writes f1 fics #tree writes stuff

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ghosttownwherenoonegoes · 1 year

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I find it quite difficult to swallow my medication every day. I have to tip my head right back, way up to the ceiling, and hold my hand over my mouth with my eyes shut tight. I might pace or I might stand still, but I can’t just put the tablet in my mouth, take a swig of water, and swallow immediately. I can’t do it, I worry about choking or swallowing my tongue or (insert irrational thought here). Sometimes I hold it in my mouth so long that my jaw starts to ache but I still can’t swallow. I have to take deep measured breaths, distract myself with something, and then I can swallow the tablet. It is a pain in the ass process and the size of the tablet has no effect on it. I will always struggle before I can take the damn tablet.

This is what I think of every time I take my medication; Eddie helping me with this part of my day as with all other parts. I really do it for him 🫂❤️

So imagine that you struggle like this too with taking your medication, whatever it is. The first time you went through this, Eddie didn’t really understand why you were just standing there in the middle of the kitchen, staring up at the ceiling, a hand firmly over your mouth. He watched your throat move as you swallowed everything but the tablet multiple times but still you didn’t release your hand from over your mouth, and only after you let out a frustrated groan, your gaze and body language showing signs of anxiety, did Eddie realise what was going on.

“Having trouble getting it down, sweetheart?”

You nodded, looking at Eddie helplessly as you rolled your eyes at yourself because your jaw was aching but you hadn’t been able to swallow the tablet down yet. Your breaths were getting deeper, more concentrated, as your inability to take the tablet was beginning to make you panic. You had to swallow, you had to. No one else could take your medication for you, but your throat wasn’t cooperating, and neither were your thoughts telling you that you could choke, either on the tablet or your tongue, even though you knew you wouldn’t. You couldn't, either.

But you always had to process these anxieties before your throat would let you take the tablet. It was the same, every day, it never got any easier, and you envied those who could take tablets without thinking too much about it. You hoped to be like that one day, too.

Eddie approached you, his chocolate browns fixed on your throat, which was still showing signs that you hadn’t taken the tablet yet. He hovered one hand over your own, still pressed to your mouth. “Mind if we, uh, swap? You don't have to, I, uh... I just wanna help."

You do as Eddie asked, trying to swallow but still not being able to, and Eddie’s hand easily, lightly, pressed down over your mouth. He’s gentler with his touch than you were and you found yourself pushing your face into his hand, wanting a firmer grip.

“Eyes on me, Y/N,” his voice was a smooth one, his words easy, his tone light as your eyes snapped to his face. “Just look at me, Y/N, don’t think, come on,” the upward lilt in those last two words made you smile as it reminded you of when he gently pressured the Hellfire members to make a decision, and your throat moved again as the tablet slid down a bit more. Your eyes widened, heat flooded you from the inside as you worried about choking either on the tablet or your tongue, but Eddie stopped you, his curls like dark lightning as he shook his head “whoa, hey, sweetheart, no, that can’t happen, it’s okay, just keep looking at me.”

How he knew what you were afraid of, you didn't know, but you were grateful for his emotional intelligence and ease in helping you.

A few minutes ticked past and your jaw hurt so Eddie changed his tactics as he raised his other hand to lightly stroke down the length of your throat. "Easy, sweetheart, easy," he leaned in to kiss your forehead, one hand still over your mouth, "doooown the hatch, that's it," he continued to say similar sentences and you closed your eyes to listen, took a deep breath and -

You swallowed the tablet.

Your eyes shot open as you breathed a sigh of relief, Eddie's wide smile matching your own, which was revealed to Eddie as he pulled his hands away from your mouth and throat. "There you go! That was so fuckin' metal!" At your incredulous look, he insisted, "it was! Look at you, anxious but you did it anyway. I'm proud of you. When's your, uh, next dose? If - if you have one."

You filled Eddie in on your medication routine and no matter how easy or complex it is, he paid proper attention that first time, learned quickly, and now every time you take your medication, he's there right in front of you, a hand lightly over your mouth, the backs of his knuckles stroking up and down your throat, his words kind and tone gentle as he coaxed you and your body into swallowing the tablet(s) you had to take.

No matter the time of day or night, Eddie is there with you, reminding you if you find it difficult to remember to take your medication, making it as seamless for you as he can. Eddie doesn't shy away from any part of you or your life, he loves you for you.❤️

#eddie munson x reader #eddie munson #eddie munson fluff #stranger things 4 #stranger things #joseph quinn #joe quinn

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just-someone-who-likes-to-write · 1 year

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... Long Story Imgine...

(( This is based on my dear friend @tokoyamisstuff story "Scandal", which is a "Loki x Reader" Story. She stopped writing it because of horrible people who pressured to continue writing. I think the idea is really amazing and I had a different approach for it.))

((Alot of OOC, and screw Odin he can never be redeemed in my eyes))

Loki was madly in love with one of the ladies of the court, Lady (Y/n). She was the daughter of the not so known Nobel family who roamed around the castle now and then to serve the Royal family.

The first time he met her was by coincidence, as she had sneaked into the library, which is only for the Royal family, but Loki being the "Understanding" person he is, he agreed to keep her secret, in hopes of using this information to blackmail her to do his bedding. But the more time he spent with her, the more his feelings changed towards her, he saw as a friend, then a partner in crime, then finally he fell in love hard.

Loki no longer felt jealousy towards Thor because he had all the attention and friendship he could want from Lady (Y/n). He no longer desired the throne of Asgard because he had the whole world in his arms when he wrapped them around his beloved. Nothing and no one else nattered as he took care of his Lady-wife throughout her pregnancy, making many promises on how he would be a great father for their child, talking of the many things he would teach them, and assuring his wife that he would "Never" teach their child how to prank, which they both know is not true.

The second Prince had everything he ever wanted and would need, his world was perfect, but it all came crushing down the day of the birth.

He refused to leave the room as his wife gave birth, wanting to add her through it. He did not expect the scream of terror that the midwife let out as she held the babe, almost dropping it, and as he looked upon the newborn, he understood why. The baby boy has blue skin and red eyes, the appearance of a frost giant. Shock went through him as he left the room, ignoring the calls of his wife, who pleaded him to come back, his mother who waited outside took his place in, confused by her son who ignored her as he left them.

Loki went to their shared room, where he finally allowed his emotions to get out and trash everything, tears of anger poured from his eyes as realisation settle in, that Lady (Y/n), his best friend, his love, had betrayed him him with a frost giant, he doesn't know how or when, but the evidence he saw coming out of her womb was proof enough.

Meanwhile, (Y/n) was confused, scared, and sad. He doesn't understand why he child is a frost giant. She thought maybe her babe was cursed or maybe she ate something that she shouldn't have, but she couldn't ignore that the fact is still there, that this blue crying babe in her arms was her son. She called for Loki, wanting to see him to talk to him to assure him that she didn't commit the great sin of betraying her beloved husband. But the only one who came forward was Queen Frigga, who put magic around the babe so that (Y/n) can touch them without being harmed by his ice powers.

"I did not betray Loki, I swear it! Queen mother, please believe me! I love Loki too much to commit such a thing!"

"Don't worry, my child, I believe you."

When (Y/n) heard those words, she was a bit calm, confident that the Queen would find her husband and talk to him to come back to her so they can discuss what happened to their son. She didn't expect that the next time she would see Loki would be in a courst room, standing in front of Odin and other members of the Court, in a trial to judge her her for her "Betrayal" of not only her husband who was the second Prince of Asgard but also of the "Betrayal" of Asgard itself for if she was able to meet a frost giant to commit such sin, she must have been able to betray them in other ways.

"You are here by sentenced to be exiled from Asgard permanently."

"No! I did not betray anyone! Please, Loki, look at me! I never did that!" Loki looked away, his eyes filled with pain, she turned to Frigga. "Queen mother, please, you belive me-"

But Frigga only gave her a sorrowful look as she averted her eyes away in guilt. The only person who stood by her was Thor.

"Father, we have known Lady (Y/n) for centuries before she met my brother. She has always been a loyal and devoted subject of Asgard. I can not accept even the possibility of her betraying us. There must be another reason for the child to be-"

"SILENCE!" Odin booming voice, echoed throughout Asgard. "It is not up for discussion, for it is clear that she can not be trusted, not anymore."

"Then please punish me, not my son. He is but a babe and holds no blame."

"Don't worry, for you and your babe shall go to where you belong... in jotunheim."

"NO! PLEASE!!... LOKI!! LOKI PLEASE! YOU KNOW I WOULD NEVER DO SICH A THING TO YOU!! PLEASE! HE IS OUT SON-"

Her words were cut off as Loki left the courtroom, refusing to meet her eyes as she was being dragged away by gaurds. The only person who wanted to act was Thor, who was held back by his mother. In the Bifrost bridge, Thor was able to wrap around her a heavy coat, hopping that it would keep her warm enough for they didn't even give her a chance to wear anything proper before her sentence.

In jotunheim, (Y/n) wondered for hours, walking around in hopes of finding anything or anyone that could help them. Hiding behind rocks when seeing beasts hunting. During that, almost half her fast as well ass her left arm was numb from frost bites she was sure parts of her skin broke from the heavy cold but she did not care as long as her son was safe. She was exhausted and just wanted to lay down and sleep, but she refused to succumb to it, but it wasn't until she saw a frost giant coming her away that his weapon held up at her demanding how and why she was there. The only thing she could do with her left eye now completely shut is to lift her son to him with her left arm shaking, barley being able to move it.

"P ..please.....mmm...m....my...my son...."

Then everything turned black.

When (Y/n) woke again, she felt warm, slolwy looking around she saw how she was covered in heavy furr, and in the middle of the room there was large controlled fire that kept the room warm. She was still in a daze that it took a while for her to realise that her body was bandaged, but when she came to her senses, the first thing she asked for was her son. Luckily, in the room with her, she was a female frost giant who looked a bit smaller and different than the first one she met. She assured her she was safe and even ordered to bring the child from nursery so she could hold him to calm her further. (Y/n) cried in relief as she saw her son sleeping peacefully.

She was so focused on her son that she didn't notice when Laufey came into the room to speak with her and know the origin of the babe in her arms.

"Now, tell me little one, how did you come here, and more importantly, where did you get him?" He said pointing to your son.

(Y/n) would be lying if she said she wasn't afraid, but looking around her and at herself, she assured herself that he doesn't want to harm her, so she speaks. She speaks of her punishment, the reason behind it, of her husband, who turned her back on her.

"The Queen Frigga did nothing."

"Yes, she kept assuring me that my child was Loki's, but during the trial, she said nothing."

"Well, of course, Frigga does have a good heart, but she would hide away if it meant aiding her coward husband."

"What ... what do you mean?"

"Oh, you poor thing, of course you don't know the truth, nor does your husband know of his true origin. For your see, Loki is my son."

Seeing the confused and shocked look, the king explained and revealed the truth. Centuries ago, during the great was between Asgard and Jotunheim, his beloved Queen, who was from a tribe of smaller frost giants, was giving birth to their son, but unfortunately, she died during child birth. Consumed and blinded by his grief, the king left the child in an abandoned temple. However, when he came back to his senses and returned for the babe, he found the temple had fallen, and he assumed that his son had died in it.

"I never forgave myself, and refused to take another after her, I was just waiting for the time when I would go and meet them in the afterlife. But now here you are in front of me, holding a jotunheim babe, claiming it's your husband's who is the second prince."

"Are you....are you saying that...that Odin..."

"Odin probably found Loki when he was a babe, and instead of returning him to me, he kept him claiming him as his son."

"B... But why?!...why would he do that?? Why would he hide his origin from him?... Why would... my child...he was ready to kill me and my child to hide this secret. What would he do when Loki finds the truth, was he planning to keep it a secret his entire life?!"

"You have the right to feel this outrage towards him, Odin always puts his own interest before others. Unfortunately, I also don't know his reasons."

"......what now?"

"What do you mean?"

"What will you do? Now that you know that....that your son is alive and that he lives on Asgard, not knowing the truth....That you have his wife...previous wife...with you here with his son, your grandson. What will you do?"

"....I heard stories of the woman who stole the heart of the god of mischief. I believe that he might come here searching for you."

"You mean for my corpse?" She replied bitterly. "He turned his back on me."

"He didn't know the truth."

"He didn't even give me a chance to speak to him. Even when Odin gave the sentence, he didn't even dare to show a hint of remorse or hesitation or even attempt for a lighter the sentence. He abandoned me... if he abandoned me like this without a question, that means he has always doubted me..."

"... if he did come for you, what would you want to happen?"

(Y/n) was shocked that Laufey was even giving her the free option on what to do, to the son he thought he lost no less. But she was still grateful that at least this king was giving her a chance, unlike Odin, who she followed blindly.

"I don't want to see him... Even if he found out the truth... he made his choices."

(Y/n)'s emotions were running high after giving birth, and immediately going through what she did would force her to make hasty action. But as she looked down at her son, whose skin changed colour after she touched him, she assumed it was Frigga's magic so she could touch her son without being affected, she understood that this was no longer about what's good for Loki but what is good for her son, and if it means to stay in Jotunheim to keep him safe from the horrors of Asgard so be it. She is no longer the wife of Loki Odinson but the mother of Liam Crown Prince of Jotunheim.

It was a month after the trial that Loki No longer could stand the hole that was left by his Lady-wife. He was too attached to her. He loved her so much. At first, he tried to force himself to forget her,reminding himself again and again of her infidelity, but then he didn't even care if she betrayed him or not, the sound of her cries for him hunted him every second of his existence, her tearful eyes hunted his dreams. He wanted her back. Even if it meant to be exiled with her, he did not care he just wanted his beloved (Y/n).

That's how he found himself standing in front of Laufey after being dragged by frost giants who found him roaming around their territory, looking for her.

"You have come a long way, Asgardian."

"Where is she?" Loki demanded not being intimidated by the Jotunheim king.

"Where is who?"

"My wife! She was here with an infant, where is she!"

"Ah, you mean the woman whom you left for death? No, I haven't. "

His words triggered Loki as he used his magic to teleport himself to be near Laufey enough to press his dagger against his neck.

"If you did as much as harm a hair on her head I will-"

His angry words were cut off as Laufey took hold of his wrist, and instead of his arm freezing to the bone, it was only his clothes that good shattered, but his arm was fine, that wasn't the only thing that shocked him as he saw his skin turn blue. When Loki pulled his arm away, the king let him go, and he watched as his blue skin slowly turned back. The Prince still looked shocked as his eyes looked from his arm back to Laufey.

"What kind of magic-"

"It is no magic of mine, but rather the magic of Asgard." Loki looked at him confused. "If you seek answers, I advise you to go to the all father for them."

Back on Asgard Loki goes immediately to the Vault to where the Casket is, not noticing that behind him was Odin, who knew of Loki's travel to Jotunheim and hurried after him after knowing of his return. Seeing him near the Casket terrified, he tried to stop him, but it was too late. Loki found the truth.

"Why? You were knee-deep in Jotun blood. Why would you take me??

"You were an innocent child-"

"Oh, don't act like you care for the fate of an innocent infant now. You took me for a purpose. What was it?"

When Odin doesn't answer, Loki lost it.

"TELL ME!!"

"I thought we could unite our kingdoms one day, bring about an alliance, bring about a permanent peace... through you. But those plans no longer matter."

"So I am no more than another stolen relic, locked up here until you might have use of me."

"Why do you twist my words?"

"You could have told me what I was from the beginning. Why didn't you?"

"You are my son. My blood. I wanted only to protect you from the truth."

"Protect me? By hiding who i am from me, by allowing me to marry an amazing woman who you knew our children would be like me, and instead of telling me the truth then you decided to stay quite and tell lies of her being untrustworthy and disloyal to keep your image in front of your people. Why?because I am the monster parents tell their children about at night? You don't want Asgard to know you have a monster for a son?"

"Don't-"

"It all makes sense now. Why you favoured Thor all these years."

"Listen-"

"Because no matter how much you claim to "love" me, you could never have a Frost Giant for a son, or having his offspring running around and forced to claim them as grandchildren ,or even the chance of one of them sitting on the Throne of Asgard!"

During Odin's sleep, Loki was so consumed with rage and hatred that he planned to kill Thor so his "parents" could feel the same pain he felt. So he constructed a plan, he tricks Thor into taking the challenge of living as a Midgardian, leaving his hammer in Asgard to assure he won't cheat. And Thor does, and during his time there, after meeting jane and the others, Loki sends assassins and killer tools to end Thor.

In the end, Thor was safe. Seeing he is unable to kill, Thor Loki goes to try and Kill Odin himself, but he gets caught by his mother, who used her powers to stop him.

"Why would you do all this to your family, brother?"

"I am not your brother, and you are no family of mine, not after you tried to kill my own."

Thor was confused by everything, but Frigga understood, and she cried as she apologized profusely to Loki. But it was for no use as he escaped Asgard completely. After Odin was awake, he tried to swipe everything under the rug and claim that Loki simply went mad after the betrayal of his wife, but Frigga puts her foot down and tells the truth to everyone, of what happened, or Loki's origin, and how Lady (Y/n) was innocent.

After the news spread wide, Odin tried to save face by sending soldiers along with Thor to bring her back, only to be met with Laufey and his own soldiers trying to chase them away from Jotunheim. But Thor wouldn't budge, not after learning that she was with Laufey.

"Return who you took Laufey or else!"

"...."Who I took?"...if I remember correctly, it was you Asgardians who banished her and her newborn to my realm in the hopes for her and her child's end." He mocked the Prince, which only made him lift his hammer to fight until a voice called.

"Please do not taunt the prince your majesty, for he has short temper and might start a new war."

It was (Y/n) who came out from where she was hiding with handmaidens following shortly. But her face was covered with a hood, but it didn't make Thor any less happy to see and hear her again. He tried to come close, but the frost giants stopped him and (Y/n) allowed it.

"I'm not coming back to Asgard."

"...But ...but why?"

"Are you truly asking me why? After everything I went through?"

(Y/n) revealed her face and the sight hurt Thor. There were scars from the frostbites littering the left side of her face. Her left eye was stuck, being half lidded while the right eye could open and close normally.

"If it wasn't for King Laufey who added me in time, I would have died a long time ago along with my son. I know you mean well Thor, after all, you were the only one who came to my defence against your own father, but will not return to the king who punished me for a crime he knew I didn't commit, to a queen who turned a blind eye for the sake of her king.... and to a husband who turned his back on me on the first sign of doubt."

"Loki still loves you! He never forgot you!"

"He should because I hold no love for him anymore."

"...you...you don't mean that."

".....goodbye Thor." She turned and left, ignoring Thor's calls for her.

(( After the events of the Avengers and Loki being captured))

The only reason Loki took control of Thanos army is because he wanted to build a new world for (Y/n) and their son. A kingdom just for them, away from anyone that could harm them, a haven for his beloved family. It was all delusions caused by his time being tortured under the mad titan.

After his capture, Odin wanted nothing more than to just imprison Loki away but Frigga and Thor were there defending him.

"He tried to kill me."

"And you tried to kill (Y/n) along with thier son."

It was Thor who spoke this time. And reluctantly, Odin allowed loki to meet his mother and brother during his imprisonment. He didn't react to them at first at their attempt to speak with him. Even when his mother provided him with comfort he did not react, it wasn't until Thor mentioned (Y/n) that Loki finally not only looked at him but also spoke.

"You saw her?"

"Yes, I did"

"Where was she? Is she hurt? How is my son?" He threw one question after another.

He explained to him that she was in Jotunheim under King Laufey's protection, that she was well, aside from the scares, which he could see Loki physically flinch at the mention of them, feeling guilt that his love was hurt because of his rash actions.

"I need to see her."

"I'm afraid you can't brother."

"Then bring her to me, tell her that everyone knows now that doesn't need to hide away among the Jotunheims."

"You don't understand, brother. She is aware that everyone on Asgard knows the truth, including you... She just refused to return her, not after everything, including returning to you."

This broke Loki.

He refused to believe that she gave up on him, so he wrote a letter with many oages and gave it to Thor to give it to her personally. Only for his brother to return with the letter back not even opened. He tried again and again, not only letters but also sent Symbolic gifts that he hoped would ignite her love for him again and remind her of what they had.

The last gift he sent were Heliotrope flowers, the same flowers he gave her the day he asked for her hand. It was their thing to communicate through flower language, giving each other one flower that could explain their deepest feelings without having to speak it.

Loki prayed to the gods that she would accept it, but his hopes were shattered when Thor returned again, but this time, his head was down in shame, as he showed him the flowers but they weren't returned as they were like the previous gifts but were torn.

"She got really angry, and Laufey banished me out of Jotunheim. I can not return there even if I wanted to, I'm sorry, brother."

Meanwhile, (Y/n) was crying angry tears. The last gift felt like an insult. How dare he try to proclaim his "Eternal love" to her after hurting her so much. It hurt her receiving those gifts that only pained her as she remembered each memory they held in them, her memories when her and Loki were blindly in love, but the flowers were the last straw that broke her for they held the memory of what was supposed to be the happiest day of her life.

Laufey was enraged when he saw her cry, he come to care for (Y/n) as the daughter he never had. He first cared for only only because she was the mother of his grandson, but with time, she became more than just that, even declared her a princess of Jotunheim. So the princes to try and use those gifts to guilt trip her into returning was unforgivable.

And by his words, Asgard was completely cut off from Jotunheim.

For years, Loki was depressed. Dark thoughts filled his mind as he came to the realisation that he had lost everything. Thor and Frugga tried to cheer him up. They even went as far as forcing Odin to set him free to return to his old life, back to his freedom, but it only worsened his condition as people in the court started looking at him even more wearily than before becoming of his origin, his day to day life felt empty, and even his room who he used to hide in for comfort felt cold for the one who always comforted him was (Y/n) and she was gone.

One day, Haiemdal cane into the courtroom, saying how Laufey sent a massage. The mention of the King caught the attention of the royal family, especially Loki, who stood face to face to him.

"He said that he hopes that we will accept to renew the treaty between Asgard and Jotunheim."

"For what reason?" It was Odin who asked, and as much as everyone wanted to scold him for doubting a peace offering, they also we curious of the reason.

"It appears that the crown prince Liam wishes to know his father."

Those words made Loki cry with joy. His son wanted to meet and come to him. Such news made everyone at high alert. Many preparations were done to welcome the prince. They prepared a room filled with everything a boy his age might enjoy. They prepared a feast just for him, and many more things that the prince might find enjoyable. A bug celebration just for him.

Loki, Thor, and Frigga were in the middle of the rainbow bridge waiting patiently. Loki wanted to wait inside the bifrost by Frigga, which forced him against it, for they didn't know what reaction they would get. Once the bifrost stopped working, they could see coming out of it were few frost giants who stood gaurd as they shielded who was coming behind them. Loki was nervous as he knew very well who they were shielding. He fixed himself and stood straight as the gaurds finally came to a stop and moved away to make way for another frost giant who was smaller than them, but this one was special as he carried none other than princess (Y/n), whose face was covered with a heavy hood. The frost giant knelt down so she would be able to come down.

"Welcome, (Y/n), I am happy to see you well again."

"...Queen Frigga." She replied simply with a nod, her voice nonchalant.

Hearing her voice again made Loki weak on the knees. He wanted nothing more than to run to her and hold her in his arms as he apologized against and again, begging her to return to him. But he stayed quite not trusting his voice.

"Sister! I'm really happy to see you again! Please come we made quite the feast for you both, come and let me tell you of my adventures in midgard."

"That won't be necessary as I will not be staying here."

"You won't?" Asked Frigga with sorrowful look.

"No, I won't." (Y/n) started. "As I said last time, I won't be stepping in Asgard ever again. The only reason I am here to see MY son off and to assure his safety."

Loki flinched at the emphasis.

"M..my love-"

"Don't you even dare."

That made Loki flinched again at her harsh tone.

"I am no longer an Asgardian... nor am I your wife..."

"No, you will always be much more than that."

At those words (Y/n), finally let down her hood, allowing Loki and Frigga to see the scars that Thor spoke them off and that made guilt erupt in Loki as he unknowingly moved forward wanting to examine the scars, to kiss them and comfort his beloved, only to be blocked by frost giants who used his weapon to stop him. But (Y/n) was still visible, and he could see the deep frown she had as she looked at him before turning away.

"Liam, you can come now sweetheart."

From the back, a small figure came forward, and Odin's family eyes widened in awe at what they saw. Standing there was a boy who looked 12 years of age, he looked at the spitting image of Loki aside from a few features of (Y/n).

Liam looked at them with equal awe, but his eyes focused on the prince in green. When he was young, he was always curious about who his father was. He never lacked a father figure as his grandfather filled that role perfectly, but there was always something that he longed for. So a few months ago, when he finally asked his mother of who his father was, (Y/n) didn't want to make the same mistake that Odin made and told him everything.

"I might not hold the same feelings I had in the past... but I know that he still cares for you deeply, so don't let our reasons for separation hold you back to what you want. If you wish to meet him, then I am all for it."

Liam was hesitant at first, but after a conversation with his grandfather, Liam decided that he wanted to meet Loki, so that he can decide whether he wants to continue to have him in his life or cut him off like his mother did.

Liam ran to his mother and hugged her, causing her to giggle as she hugged him back. Loki's heart melted at the scene, wanting to join the hug. Liam turned to Loki and walked up to him, forna second Loki thought that his son wanted to hug him too only to be met with a raised hand.

"Hello, my name is Liam (Y/n)son, crown prince of Jotunheim, and from what I am told your son."

He chuckled at his own joke, making Loki smile proudly at him as he held his hand for a shake. When their hands touched, their skin started to change to blue. Loki was silently horrified as he never accepted his Jotunheim self, unlike Liam, who only chuckled as he let go of his father's hand.

"Sorry, the spell always breaks when I touch other Jotunheims."

Loki's skin turned back to normal, but Liam's stayed the same, which confused not only Loki but also Frigga and Thor. So (Y/n) stepped in to explain as she wrapped her around around her son.

"Liam has control over his appearance. He can switch from Asgardian to Jotunheim."

"My Asgardian appearance is just an illusion. I will always be a Jotunheim."

Liam proclaimed proudly, having no issues with his Jotunheim appearance, unlike Loki, who gave a weary look, not knowing how he should feel.

"Liam, why don't you go and .ake sure you have everything." When her son left back to his luggage (Y/n) to Loki and gave his a warning. "The only reason I am allowing this is because Liam deserves to make his own decisions, and I'll support him through. But I'm warning you, Odinson, and to those who hear me that if ANY harm comes to my son from ANYONE or ANYTHING, I will personally make you regret your existence. Am I understood?"

"O..Of course my lov- I mean your highness." He corrected himself when he saw her frown deepen.

Before leaving, (Y/n) hugged her son goodbye before going back to the frost giant who carried and left, leaving 2 frost giant gaurds to protect the crown prince, proving further that she doesn't trust them.

"Why is the frost Giant carrying her everywhere?" Asked Thor.

"My mother can't walk long distances." Liam hesitantly explained. "Because she was in Jotunheim's cold, not properly protected her muscles and bones aren't that strong, the healer says the only reason she is still able to walk was because she kept moving."

Images of (Y/n) fighting the cold weather with their son in her arms hunted Loki, imagining all the worst ways that she might have suffered because of him, feeling dread creeping on him as his breaths quickened slowly and so did his heart rate. But hearing his son call him pulled him out before it can consume him again.

As he looked down at Liam, Loki swore that not only would he be a great father to him but also to try and win (Y/n)'s heart again so his son may get the loving family that he deserves. As they made their way to Asgard, he started thinking of all those ways that he could tempt Liam with to stay more with him and hoping it would also persuade (Y/n) to come back.

....

I couldn't sleep until I could write this. This is one of my long imagines. I hope you enjoyed it, and I'm sorry that the timeliness doesn't make sense.

#loki x reader #jotun loki x reader #loki x y/n #loki x f!reader #loki x female reader #I wrote this instead of sleeping

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aintgonnatakethis · 2 years

Text

I got top surgery on Wednesday 9th November 2022 and thought I would record the experience here in case it could help anyone. Basically a step by step of the process (with a few problems along the way). I’m happy to answer any questions anyone might have.

The receptionist confirmed who I was, my address, and how to contact my next of kin, then checked I'd had no covid symptoms for the past 30 days and no one in my family had any them in the past 90. We still remain super careful due my grandmother being 91 and my mother being immunocompromised so everything was good.

My ward nurse took me to my private room. I was very pleased about not being on an open ward as I can have odd sleeping patterns. She said my name and then my deadname which after I stiffly corrected her she apologised and pointed to her nametag which said her name was my old one. Ironic and much better than the first thing the medical staff doing being deadnaming me lol

She went through my list of meds with me (quite a few) and gave me a special sponge to use in the shower to disinfect myself and change into a medical gown. Despite the radiator not being on the room was sweltering (in November) so I had to ask them to open my window. Was definitely thankful for the warmth after I got back from surgery as I was very cold then.

A woman with a massive menu came round and asked what I wanted in my post-op sandwich, for dinner that night, and breakfast the next morning, I'm normally an NHS patient (not really sure what the equivalent is in the US, maybe medicare? - but it's basically the underfunded underpaid free healthcare and I was referred to a private hospital because their waiting lists were too long.) With the NHS you get whatever food you get and this place was like a fucking restaurant!

The surgeon then came by to draw lines and dots on my chest, then the anaesthesiologist to go through my meds again. When I told him I had a phobia of needles he said he'd be happy to provide me with laughing gas before he put the canula in. The nurse then fitted me with compression socks, which help prevent blood clots post surgery. They weren't uncomfortable at all, just felt like regular socks but with no toes. I have to wear them for 2 weeks after the surgery.

I waited in my room for two hours so even if you're not staying overnight I'd recommend you bring some form of entertainment. I brought my laptop with some books downloaded onto it and obviously a direct line with home so I could keep them up-to-date.

A new nurse then came in, got me into a dressing gown and took me down to the operating theatre. They didn't undress me until I was unconscious, just rolled down one gown sleeve to put a blood pressure cuff on. The surgeon rubbed a local anaesthetic into the back of my hand and had a bit of trouble finding a vein for the canula (which wasn't unexpected as I have very poor circulation). While he was doing this the nurse held the laughing gas mask over my face, which made me light headed and a bit slurred when I spoke.

There wasn't any slow falling asleep or blur out like on TV when he injected me with the anaesthetic. One moment I had the laughing gas mask on, then I blinked and had an oxygen mask on and was in the recovery room. I didn't realise everything had been done, but my body certainly knew something was up as it almost immediately went into shock.

Would NOT recommend doing that!

Can safely say it was the worst pain I've ever felt, a sharp stabbing sensation across the whole of my chest. The only thing I could think was that if I moved it would be worse so I had to stay as still as possible. It took a dose of Morphine and 3 doses of Fentanyl before the pain lessened. I was too out of it know how long they took between doses but they seemed pretty on it so even though it felt like a long time in that level of pain it probably wasn't. They were insistent on verbal responses from me between doses.

I was wheeled back to my room and have a foggy memory of three nurses clustered around me all quite worried about how blue my fingers were. Things got better from there quickly though, had no nausea or dizziness when a nurse helped me up to go to the bathroom, so had a sandwich and they gave me Tramadol for the residual pain. Ate dinner without a problem (rich peoples' hospitals and their actual food, dude!) and had no constipation from the anaesthetic.

Didn't sleep well but I never do in places that aren't home, and the nurses were coming in every 2-3 hours to check my blood pressure and the drains. In the morning the left drain had a lot more blood coming out than the right so the surgeon decided to keep me in another night. In the end we had 50ml in the right and 300ml in the left and I bled onto the bed quite a bit around the area where the left drain was in. Apparently one side just sometimes bleeds more.

Having the drains out the next day was... an experience. I was still on the Tramadol and the pinch of pain wasn't so bad, but the sliding sensation of a rather long tube coming out of me felt real weird. The background pain dropped a LOT as soon as they were out. Minor leakage around the left wound, but nothing too bad.

Had fresh bandages put on then two nurses wrapped me up in a binder like a burrito. The stiff material of the binder is gonna be right up in your armpits so I'd recommend you do something about any hair you have there before you go. I ran a hair trimmer over both pits.

I can't really offer any advice about if you have a long car ride home. I had a 90 minute drive (as the passenger obvs) and I had black edging into the corners of my vision by the end of it. Standing up before getting into the car was fine, but then not being able to breathe properly plus the movement of the car made me feel very light-headed and nauseous. Went straight to bed when I got home and feel much better since I've woken up. Can do basic movements of putting on a button up shirt, brushing my teeth, etc, but was standing up for twenty minutes to talk to someone and that was enough for me. Have been taking codeine as a painkiller as that's what I take for other issues - have a little burning and aching across my chest (and chafing in my my armpits >.<) but nothing I wouldn't expect from just having had surgery.

#trans #top surgery #trans men #trans masc #transmasc #transgender #mine #antony fitton

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sociallyanxiouscryptid-writings · 1 year

Text

Robbery Part 2

Here we go, Part 2! Hope you like it.

Blurb: Villain has been robbed, a task that should have been impossible, but worst of all they have no idea who, how, or even what was taken.

Based in the OC world of a bigger project.

Part 1

CW: Mentions of torture, painful memories, swearing, capture, injury, interrogation

The room Civilian was put in was surprisingly nice. Not nice as in, it was a hotel they would stay at, but nice as in its not the worst kind of cell they could have been put in. It was a small, the centre taken up by a table and chairs, the side with the uncomfortable cot they laid in. Their hands were cuffed in front of them, which was a little rude, but at least their shoulder was wrapped in bandages and their knee had some sort of brace… thing… on it. Honestly they hadn’t thought that one was that bad, but if someone wanted to spend resources on them, Civilian wasn’t about to stop them.

On one side of the table, the side closest to them was a bottle of water and a snack bar. Beside the bed was a truth that Civilian ignored, holding their breath as they sat up. The room span but after a couple of seconds settled until they began the process again. They took in a long and steady breath before standing, using their good leg as the main support before experiment with pressure on the other.

They could put some weight on it, and the pain of pushing it was bearable. It was looking down at themselves during this process that they realised they were in different clothes. Some grey slacks and a plain shirt, at least not a hospital gown or something. But, worst of all, Civilian realised they had removed their sunglasses, Civilian eyes bare for the world to see. They let out a sigh moved passed it and limped to the table, taking a seat in front of the water and food.

They pushed both aside, looked up at the camera’s staring down at them, the little red light glaring back.

“Can we get this over with please,” they said, “I have a busy schedule.”

A very busy schedule, one they can’t even begin to figure out how to resume. How the fuck were they going to get out of this. They can barely walk and they expect to be able to escape Villain of all people? While their whole attention is on Civilian? There is no way they aren’t fucked, no way this isn’t the end and yet there is no way they can let this be the end. One way or another they are going to get out, they have to.

The door hissed, followed by a clunk before it opened and in walked, not Villain. Civilian knitted their brows together.

“Who the fuck are you?”

They closed the door behind them and with a sharp clank the door was locked again.

“I am Right Hand,” Right Hand said. “Villain is a little busy right now.”

Civilian snorted. “Sure, whatever you say.”

“Villain is a very busy person, lots on their plate. They don’t have time for little issues like you, that’s my job. To deal with the things Villain doesn’t have time to worry about.”

“Wow, that’s a low blow. Unfortunately for you I don’t have much of an ego to bruise.” Civilian leaned back in their chair. “Besides, what you are saying is absolute bullshit. I know what I stole, and I know that Villain cares a lot about it. If that thing got in the hands of the Heroes, or some megalomaniac Villain? Everything they have worked for would be destroyed.”

Right Hand cocked his head. “But you are neither of those things.”

“Do I look like either of those things?” They vaguely gestured to themself. “I am a nobody.”

Right Hand stood at the side of the table, leaned on it.

“A nobody who broke into the most secure facility in the entire world, and just killed a small army of people. That’s a lot for a nobody.”

“Now you are just trying to flatter me.”

“Not really,” Right Hand’s eyes narrowed, “I want to know how, because for obvious reasons we can’t have that happening.”

Civilian waved a hand. “Don’t worry, everyone else is too scared of Villain to try something like that. If it were that easy the heroes would be crawling through here by now.”

“So you’ve achieved something not even the heroes together could achieve?”

“I didn’t say that. What do they say about beginners luck and all that?

Now Right Hand’s brows furrowed as he studied Civilian, trying to understand the person sitting in front of him.

“I am going to cut to the chase,” They said.

“Finally,” Civilian groaned.

Right Hand glared. “You get one opportunity to tell me what I want to know before I take the information myself.”

Civilian scoffed. “You want to torture me? Good luck.”

“No, we don’t find torture an effective method of information gathering. People will say whatever you want them to, to make it stop. We have much more efficient and accurate ways of retrieving information. So, what will it be?”

Civilian leaned forward, a stupid grin on their face. “Well now I am curious what this method is, option B please.”

Right Hand withheld another sigh.

“Very well.”

Right Hand stepped around Civilian, disappearing behind them.

“This will not be pleasant,” Right Hand said.

Civilian smiled and looked up into the camera.

“We’ll see about that.”

Right Hand placed their hands on Civilian’s head and Civilian stiffened, Right Hand closing their eyes. After a second Civilian’s closed too.

It felt like what Civilian imagined it would feel like to have your brain grabbed by someone’s bare hands while you were awake. There was a yanking sensation and Civilian fell back into themself, appearing in a library. Not a big, grand one with towering ceilings and beautiful architecture, but more of a run down school or council library, shelves lining the walls, old wooden tables and chairs placed in the centre of the clearing they stood. From the clearing there were six pathways made up of bookshelves, leading off into darkness. Civilian sat down on one of the tables as Right Hand looked around the place.

“Wow, this is pretty cool,” Civilian said. “Is this my mind?”

“Yes,” Right Hand said. “This room is based off a place very dear to you. Sometimes a place you don’t even remember. From here I can access every single one of your memories, and if you don’t tell me how you got in, and where the things you stole are, I am going to go through each of your memories until I find it.”

“Oh, I see. So you get to just go through everyone’s personal shit to get what you want.” They leaned back on the table, “hm, and I am guessing the person gets to experience their memories while you go through them.”

“Yes,” Right Hand said, “it can be very emotionally taxing and for some people, extremely unpleasant.”

“I can imagine,” Civilian said. “There has to be a way you know what you are looking for though, otherwise that’s a lot of shit for you to sift through.”

“I have ways,” Right Hand eyed them, “I don’t think you are appreciating what’s about to happen here.”

Civilian smiled, bubbling with excitement and anticipation. “Probably not.”

“This is your last chance to give me what I want.”

Civilian just smiled.

“Suit yourself.”

Right Hand turned and headed towards one of the paths, glancing back at Civilian one more time only to see them still grinning. Their expression creased but Right Hand kept moving approaching the first pathway.

However, before they could walk through, a silvery barrier stopped them.

“You people are always so cocky,” Civilian said now leaning forward, elbows on their knees. “Thinking you can do whatever, whenever you want just because you’re powerful. Heroes and Villains, honestly these days there isn’t much difference between you and you all seem to think you are the only ones.”

Right Hand turned around, unable to hide the shock in their face.

“Are you stopping me?”

“What ever do you mean?” The sarcasm dripped from their voice. “You’re the one invading my mind, how could I possibly have any power against you?”

Right hand glared, walked to a different path but was once against met with the same silvery energy. They turned, looked around and suddenly all paths had a silvery sheen blocking it.

“How are you doing this?”

Civilian shrugged and hopped off the table.

“You’re the one who made the mistake of going into the mind of a person you don’t understand.”

They waved their hand and a chair appeared out of no where, ramming into the back of Right Hand’s knees and forcing them to sit. The moment their limbs touched wood, the wood twisted and grew, wrapping around them, holding them in place. Right Hand struggled, but the wood bit into their skin.

Right Hand looked up, mouth open but all words failed them. They were no longer in a library, there was only a single bookshelf here, between the tv and the couch. They stood in a wooden cabin, snow falling outside the window.

“How…”

“Hey you’re the one who opened up a connection between our minds, not my fault you thought you were the only one who could use it.”

Civilian said striding over to the bookshelf.

“What are you doing?”

“I might as well get some information while I’m here.”

“Stop,” Right Hand pulled against the chair.

They did, turned around and smiled.

“Oh darling don’t stress,” suddenly they stood directly in front of Right Hand. “Here why don’t you relax a little, go for a walk.” They kicked the chair and Right Hand flew back.

The room vanished and Right Hand fell.

Their life flashed before their eyes, every moment consuming them in an instant. They felt all the pain they’ve ever felt, all the joy, the sadness, the terror. It was a vortex of everything funnelling through them, around them. Right Hand had no sense of anything, no sense of how much time passed or even what was happening. They saw faces of people they never wanted to see again, memories they had pushed down deep, sorrows they had fought to move past. And perhaps even worse, they saw the happy memories connected to those, the good parts of their life long behind them, ended abruptly and painfully.

Right Hand plummeted, and suddenly they weren’t.

Everything stopped all at once and Right Hand was back in Civilian’s library, except now the tables were broken, books scattered and Villain was their, holding Civilian by the throat, blood dripping from their nose.

Right hand couldn’t catch their breath, couldn’t stop the memories.

Villain appeared beside them, hands on their now free arms.

“Hey, you need to breath, focus on breathing, draw it in slow, let it out slow, long, deep and controlled, ok?” Villain squeezed their arms, “in,” they released the pressure, “out.”

Right Hand struggled to take in a breath, following Villains pattern of pressure.

“Good, nice and slow.”

Right Hand looked up, met Villain’s eyes, then looked passed them. Civilian had been pushed against the wall, the material bending itself unnaturally around their wrists to hold them place. They glared, the first real look of emotion Right Hand had seen since walking into that room. They glared at Villain, but the anger went further out then that.

Without thinking Right Hand stood, gaze fixed on Civilian. Villain stepped back, letting Right Hand walk forward.

“You are looking for something,” Right Hand said.

“I’m not in the mood to talk,” They said.

“You’re angry.”

“This has put a dampener on my day, yes.”

Right hand stared at them, head cocked brows furrowed as the picture, the feeling blurred a little.

“You are hiding it from me.”

Civilian scoffed, “of course I am hiding it from you, why wouldn’t I?”

Villain came to Right Hand’s side and placed a hand on their shoulder.

“We should go before they regain control,” Villain said.

Right Hand nodded and without hesitation broke the connection.

Everyone shot back into their own mind and a migraine began forming in Civilian’s head. They groaned, pressed their palms into their forehead.

“You’re right Right Hand that was unpleasant.”

Right Hand stepped back, balling the hands into fists to try and stop them shaking. Villain was beside them, removed their own hands from Civilian and looked to Right Hand.

“You go, I’ve got this from here.”

Right Hand nodded and left without a single hesitation. Civilian watched them go out of the corner of their eye, watched Villain come around them.

“You just keep getting more and more interesting don’t you.”

Villain rounded the table and Civilian raised their head to watch them.

“What can I say, I’m an interesting person.”

They stared each other down, Villain now standing on one side of the table, staring into those silvery eyes. But that wasn’t the only interesting part about them. The silver leaked out of the bottom of the pupil, like paint dripping out of its container, creating three uneven lines under their pupil.

Civilian had the advantage at least. They knew Villain, knew what they were capable of, their history, their goals. Villain was an open book who had shared their pages with the world. Civilian on the other hand was a nobody, a mystery. Villain knew nothing about them and would continue to know nothing until such a time Civilian decided to share, and that was never going to happen.

“So, what are we thinking here?” Civilian said, snapping the silence. “You’re friends trick didn’t work, and unless you want a mind to mind fist fight, you attempting the same thing won’t work, and I don’t feel like sharing much of anything with you.”

“Yes, we seem to be in a bit of a situation don’t we?” Villain took a seat. “It must feel nice, having the upper hand on the city’s greatest villain.”

“I really couldn’t care less about it,” Civilian said. “I’m not really into that kind of stuff.”

“And yet you stole from me,” Villain said.

Civilian scoffed, “what? Do you think I did that as some sort of power play? You had something that I needed so I took it, its not much more complicated then that.”

“It is though,” Villain said, the darkness in their voice startled Civilian a little. Damn that’s intimidating.

“Because,” Villain continued, “you didn’t take just anything from me, you took three of my most powerful and dangerous weapons, three. The book and the amulet I can understand, they have many uses and if one figures out how to use them, you can essentially do whatever. However, I am struggling to understand what possible use you would have for a reality bending bomb.”

“Are you worried I am going to hurt someone with it?” Civilian asked.

“No, I am worried you are going to fuck up my plans. I have built a very careful structure in this city and its still growing. Its not yet self sufficient, and a chuckle head like you coming in with a bomb and a Dark Grimoire would really fuck with me day.”

Civilian nodded, “that does sound like it would be annoying.”

Villain sighed and let irritation into their expression, studying Civilian. Clearly showing off wasn’t the point, because this would be the perfect moment for them to boast about their triumph. They have some sort of mission, a reason to need what they stole, but other then destroying the city, if not the world, Villain can’t think of what they may want. A bomb is a bomb, there are limited non-destructive goals with that, and the grimoire, well that could be anything.

“Do you even know magic?” Villain asked. “That book has killed many people trying to use it, if you don’t know what you are doing it will swallow you whole.”

“Are you trying to scare me into giving it up?” Civilian laughed, “is that the tactic you are going with?”

Villain shrugged, “you aren’t giving me much more to work with.” They leaned back, crossing their arms. “I could start threatening you. I could threaten to find your family and kill each of them until you give me my stuff back.”

There is a flicker of something in Civilian’s expression, not so much a hint of something but rather a sudden and purposeful lack of expression, as if they were working to hide a reaction. Villain studied it carefully.

“It doesn’t have to go that far though, just give me what I want, and you walk out of here scott free, without a second thought in the world.”

Civilian scoffed.

“You don’t believe me?” Villain asked.

“No, because even if I give it back to you, you still don’t know how I did it. You won’t let me leave here until you know exactly how I did it.”

“Hmm,” Villain hummed, “that is a good point. You are a security risk now, and I can’t have that.”

“So we are at an impasse here because I am not giving anything up and you aren’t letting me go.”

An impasse indeed…

“What are you looking for,” Villain asked.

Once again that purposeful stoic-ness lined Civilian’s features and their eyes shifted to the side.

“Why out of all the questions I’ve not answered do you think I will answer that?” Civilian asked.

Villain shrugged, “you kind of already have. You just confirmed for me that you are looking for something. Does it have to do with family?”

“If you think you’re going to-”

“So that’s a yes,” Villain said, “is it a family member or something else?”

Civilian’s jaw tightened.

“You’re looking for a person,” Villain said. A smile found their lips. “You have a terrible poker face by the way.”

Civilian glared at them, silvery eyes fierce and shining.

“This still helps you none,” Civilian said.

“On the contrary now I know you want something and I have something to offer you.”

That twisted Civilian’s expression, their brows furrowing, lips curving.

“You want to offer me a deal?”

Another shrug from Villain, “why is that surprising? If your ultimate goal is something else and I want my stuff back bad enough, it makes sense to take away your need for my stuff and help you achieve your goal.”

Civilian’s jaw ached from clenching it. It was an absolutely horrendous idea, and Villain shouldn’t be trusted for even a second. Not to mention the fact Villain is leaving the security risk aspect out of this and that Civilian has no confidence that at any point Villain will willingly let them go.

But they know that already. They are already planning to escape on their own and if Villain can help them, then they would have even more chance of escaping…

Civilian let out a breath, looked at Villain.

“I am looking for my son.”