lusalemaart

[lusalemaart]

The tiniest conductor

#THEN whatcha gonna do? What ya gonna do? What? whatcha gonna do when i'm fucking small like one inch tall #you won't see me coming at all! #early post bc i will fg probably if i dont #PRETTY FACE TRYNA CHASE THE TRAIN #AND I COULD LOOK THE OTHER WAY BUT IT STILL WON'T ERASE THE PAIN #so i load up my train playlist which features exactly 1(one) song by Train bc i felt i needed to have at least 1 Train song in the #train playlist even though none of their songs are ABOUT trains to my knowldegde but #regardless. that one song is the 50 ways or whateevr the hell. bc. as embarrasing as it is i kinda always liked that song for some reason #anyways. it comes up and im like. drawin okabe and im like. oh shit this is a song about mayuri LMFAO #UH OH! #steins gate #steins;gate #okabe rintarou #rintarou okabe #rintaro okabe #okabe rintaro #sg #s;g #god my music taste is a disaster and a half #omg i used to have a tag for him specifically i fg what it was #was it #mcos #???? #mr. conductor okabe-san #man idk. #mr conductor okabe san

[lusalemaart]

doodles oodles

#bruh #fk #botdbs

[lusalemaart]

#dont know what version of this i liked the best doesnt matter ayayayayaay #I look to the heavens and my poor spirit guide looks down on me in this fashion and something tells me #that the last time i saw him in the 'flesh' over on the other side he likely wasnt wearing tiger stripe coats and probs didnt have green #hair but he does now and like. woops. sorry bro. hey in my defense ive asked him on multiple occasions if its all right for me to do that #and he said he doesnt care he said whatever makes me the most comfortable in a very vivid dream #GOD why is he so cool. swag master actually. why is my guy so COOL I CANT EVEN FATHOM IT. i digress #fk #c-cfk #....can i fucking help you? #M FK

[lusalemaart]

brain hurts. i dont think he hears you milord man

#i literally spent 4 hours one mornin recently again dissecting nonsense that has no concrete terrestrial answer #until i took a step back and was like #fuck its the oh see dee again eating me alive again. #i was like i need to fucking stop. it was getting real bad so i decided #to convert it/feelings into doodle format. thus this. #also been listening to viagra boys a bit lately #absolutely funny as hell actually. i like Liquids. every single lyric is like a slap to the face #fk #does my eph have a tag idk #i hate tagging things with there actual tag #but. whatever #ephraim #fess #Doodles to Have A Mental Breakdown To #c-cfk #m fk #:( im just im just :( #thinkin bout Future :( everything is scary i just want to:( give:( up tired of being:( so Sick i cant bear it :( #miserable tos hours sick of ss bs tired of poor healthcare so fucking fed up i want to Die #tired of jumping thru hoops for naught bc its a fucking disaster system and hope is useless so Tired

[lusalemaart]

crop only doodle

#wish i was like. whats the word... hmmm Not Bad at everthing #so just. miserable drawing anymore actually #i hate how i hate everything except like those few things each year that are flukes #whatever #rotp #fk #:( #i fg my tags again

[lusalemaart]

weird lookin' frog

#bleh #super mario rpg #mario rpg #smrpg #mallow #prince mallow #nintendo #super mario #HE is shaped like mashed potate #mallow color palatte said TRANS RIGHTS

[lusalemaart]

uwu

#fk #c-cfk #this one pissed me off bc i forgot to give him eye brows but like... now im not so sure he needs em #i think its fine without. its kinda funny as is. #HOWEVER was pissed when i realized i drew him blushing on both sides of his face #had intended not to do that but i did subconsciously. it is what it is #on that topic i went to *n*m*nyc this past friday bc i really wanted that dr*wf** b*bby h*ll charm so god damn bad #i pulled all four with no dupes but i got bobby last lmao #and im honestly happy abt that bc i wanted them all. just bobby the most #regardless thats not my point. my point is i dont sweat on my right side generally seeing as its physcially fucking impossible usually #BUT every now and then my nerves function just a bit and like the Average normal person probably wouldnt be excited about the fact that #they are sweating but let me tell u. i was sweating on my right collar and it was UNCOMFORTABLE and STICKY and GROSS #but also it was GOOD bc i noticeably dont sweat usually. so like. little sign that things Work sometimes over here was nice #THEREFORE my Screwy Little kyle can blush on his right side Occasionally. If the circumstances allow it. #sersiously on that scrungle grind

[lusalemaart]

sgribble

#lylian laurestine #she.... #me at age 15 designing lyl with the biggest moral scrup ever and all her black and white color palatte and left handed and and and-- #bc my projection knew no bounds. some things never change #oc #my man on the left still doesnt really have a name. i dont know what his name is but he doesnt need one he is the little Guy. #sometimes i think about the Them #misc #og

[lusalemaart]

#more doodle time #only want to draw my fucked up little guy #botdbs #fk

[lusalemaart]

Google Maps screenshot doodle study

#i swear to god i only log into this and ig to post my art right #and then i fuck off #i swear to god the ui changes every damn time and its always for the worse #im sick of it i hate it i hate it so much i need to #leave #what frustrates me is that there is not a single place anymore where i can have a decent place to store my art #bc its so much easier to just dump it on ig these days #but like you cant tag anything and its annoying. i also hate how you cant temp disable over here #its like. its . i cannot fathom how these platforms still exist. i cant put this into words. im rant #i cant remember how i would tag somweything liekfls hishofsjh fiohj iorejr #scenery #i guess #misc #places #to be fair i havent done one of these in Litcheral years #og

[lusalemaart]

#actually i have this too OK Now im done and dont want to draw anything for an indefinite period of time again #its like. i dont even 'burn myself out' per se. im not even 'art blocked' #its just. you cant burn something out if it was never ignited. #and god am i tired. #alt #my zombie boyo tho ohh hoooo #fk #c-cfk #lyrica was literally the Zombie Medication tho. now im just gonna associate my zombo kyle with lyrica #and a supcla scar naturally. #i eat a yummy dark choco kit kat i eat a yummy dark choco kit kat i eat a yu

[lusalemaart]

fou r Last but also least

#thats everything im tired goodbye im never drawing anything ever Again adios #fktober #fk #misc #doodle dump #c-cfk #rotp #botdbs #WATCH as i stop caring wahoo! #but mostly body just too bad most days

[lusalemaart]

three

#i Deadass Do Not Want to Do this anymore #fktober #rotp #mackylemore #that day i lost my mackyle charm was the WORST 24 hours of my life. #i was actually crying. tears streaming down my face. it was embarrassing. #but. i found him. #god hasnt abandoned me just yet. #i used to think that god abandoned me bc of my f*rdek*le-ing #but nowadays i know better. i know that god for me is f*rdek*le. and if i ever lose sight of that? #THEN that would actually be god abandoning me. #im wise now. i know better now. my brain.... is massive... #botdbs #c-cfk #fk #m fk #alt #cant wait until oct is over so i can. be free.

[lusalemaart]

part.2..

#i want to go to fucking sleep i never want to wake up #ran out of melly toe nin and i been suffering bc of it #need that shit to sleep man. finally hot some more today #like. yeah i guess it has been helping i was surprised. bc taking melatonin i fall asleep at like 11-12 #and then when i dont i fall asleep at 5 (if im lucky)nd wake up at 7 #finally. sleep. please. #fk #tag later #i just. i jus. i just. i. i cant. i cant . i cant bear using social media goo bye #the moment i realized i converted completely into an old man was the moment i was like. #fucking social media makes me want to kms im gonna not do it anymore #and like since then (summer 2021) ive tried to get ack into it but god i cant. its fucking terrivle #theres not a single platform worth my time. #ironic i know #but this isnt social media for me this is place to dump my *rt #for me bitch #rotp #c-cfk #mackylemore #botdbs #fktober #out here in 2023 with a worse body than i had in 2019 but im like actually doing it #im with a worse body and with less incentive too. but im doing it more than i had back then :I #not sure if im proud of myself. or beyond baffled. #whatever. doesnt matter. #i really like what i drew on the 8th. that one... make me soft #that last one was just a misc doodle #as for macktlas. mack at last? macklas? idk. bro #27 year old man is given a bk crown and hes rather bitter about it. how fucking young do you think i am?????!!!!!

[lusalemaart]

hergaberhahdjx

#tag later i want to to f*cking D*e to d*ath #fk #order is fake. idc anymore. oh my god. i did ten days thus far. #thats already better than four years ago but like #i actually hurt so bad im like. maybe ill kms on november 1st lol. pain too bad #but at the same time 10 days means nothing if its all shit #:( #notirious for fuckin' everything i touch up. and i cant learn either bc i have Problems that hold me back. #doesnt matter if my brain remembers. the synapses. the skill.. its futile. its useless. #i cant command a body that works. so its stupid. #fktober #botdbs #c-cfk #day 5 was kinda cute to do tho :) reminded me of when i was young #rather the way i used to draw. #mfk #......:( #gucci forde #con. te. partiroooo

[lusalemaart]

#I don't think I can breathe. I don't think I can read. I don't think I can think. I don't think I can see-- #FUCK. #SOMEone call the par.a.MED.IC. #I can't speak. It's. All. Phonetic. #Made me forget. E-ver-y word cause like. THAT'S A LOT OF LETTERS #ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ #AHHH TAGGING FUCKING SUGCKS #fire emblem the sacred stones #fire emblem 8 #fe8 #forde fire emblem #fire emblem forde #in my scrunkly art regression era bc trying never gets me anywhere and i dont give afuck! about anything fuck everyone and fuck everythgin #(ahem. I give a fuck. about everythng i love everyone and care aboutr everything). #fess #fk #c-c fk #m fk #fire emblem sacred stones #fire emblem

[lusalemaart]

#my... uwu #upside down because why the fuck not #not happy with this. shocker. gave me an entire months worth of panic attacks nearly everyday #odd thing is i def like it better than my 2021 draw and 2022 draw combined. and yet i still fucking #hate it #like. 'i could do better' #or so i wish. #sigh. #oh well #at least i did somehting!!!!!! #my arms is fucking killing me #rotp #fk #gucci forde #he... #what ive learned is that it doesnt matter how much time i put into anything #1 minute or 1 hour or one day or one month or one year. #i'll still never be satisfied. it'll never be good enough. #trying doesnt get me anywhere. but neither does not trying. so im just stuck in an endless cycle of tortuing myself #HAPPY BIRFDAY MY MAN AH AHAHAH i couldnt stop crying earlier and i have no idea why.ugh #im tired of living