I was looking for a way to explain to my mom and stepdad about their relationships and looks like I found it. Also this is so true
Aang is not abusive to Katara,he is a 12 year old having his first crush and doesn't know how getting together with someone is supposed to be like.Katara is only two years older than him so she's just as much of a child as he is and is not 'too mature' for him and the fact that this is a widely widespread mentality in the atla fandom shows that they see brown girls as Actual Adults™ just because they're responsible and caring
Zuko and Mai are not abusive to eachother,they are two teenage abuse victims who had barely had healthy friendships in their lives when they first got together so they couldn't have known how to properly be good for eachother because of all their trauma that they never got therapy for.Teenagers-who are children-should be allowed to mess up and then apologize and be better without being demonized,especially if the adults in their lives screwed over their mental development,which is literally what happened to Mai and Zuko
The word 'unhealthy' exists for a reason.Use it instead of treating KIDS like monsters