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dfortrafalgar · 20 days

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I'm Losing You

Having a family isn't always as easy as fairy tales make it seem.

Warnings: Read chapter 1 for warnings. This chapter contains medical trauma in an emergency room, as well as pregnancy loss.

I was going to do my usual thing and post this tomorrow, but i felt too bad making yall wait so you get a one-two punch of pain today (on the bright side, and i promise this, things start to go uphill from here, if you could believe it <3)

Taglist: @phsycochan | @mirillua | @augustanna | @chaixsherlock

Chapter 16

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The darkened operating theater’s focused silence was sharply interrupted with the sound of ringing coming from the phone tucked away in the circulating nurse’s back pocket. It was very obviously from Law’s phone, but the entire surgical crew kept their heads lowered and honed in on their work. It was quite difficult to break your stride when someone’s body was cut completely open and their beating heart was framed by a metal cage keeping the layers of fat and muscle from closing. The nurse was checking oxygen levels of the patient and simply let the phone continue to ring. No one said a word.

The ringing stopped.

Then it started again.

“Just let it go,” Law mumbled. He couldn’t be bothered, not when he was quite literally inside someone’s heart. A mitral valve replacement required just as much care as any other open heart procedure, despite being a relatively easy operation for his skilled hands.

The ringing stopped. The nurse stepped away from the monitor and made a circle around the team, checking instruments, patient vitals, and needed materials.

Then the ringing started again. This time, a few glances were tossed around the room by the attending surgeons and nurses, but Law kept his head down, neck-deep in his work. The nurse pulled the phone out of her back pocket and assessed the screen. Your photo and name were displayed.

“Doctor, it’s your wife,” she announced.

“End the call and text her that I’ll get back to her when I can.”

Following his instructions precisely, the nurse tapped the red End Call button, opened her doctor’s phone with his passcode from their previous go at this very situation, and navigated to his text messages, pulling up your conversation. She had to suppress a smile at the photo that was set for your contact- a photo of you and what she assumed to be your dog, both grinning brightly at the camera. She began to text.

Hi, this is Doctor Trafalgar’s circulating nurse again! He’s currently in the middle of an operation but he’ll call you back when he’s done!

She was about to put the device back in her pocket when it buzzed with another incoming text message.

Wifey

This is Law’s friend Shachi. Idk operating room etiquette but his wife was taken to the emergency room from her job, im here with her and another friend. Can you relay the message somehow? Thanks.

The unsuspecting nurse felt her heartbeat grow anxious. She herself didn’t really know how to properly announce that information to her supervising doctor, let alone the entire room of fellow technicians and nurses surrounding a patient with his chest fully exposed and heart cut open.

“Everything good?” the tired voice of the lead doctor called from his position, slightly hunched over the body under the bright lights and protective sheet. He had stepped back only mere centimeters to let an attending nurse go in with sutures.

“Uhm…” the circulating nurse felt her palms grow sweaty beneath her blue medical gloves. “It was one of your friends, your wife is in the emergency room, apparently.”

Law felt his blood run cold. His head shot upward to look at the poor nurse who was now unfortunately involved in this, staring at her with wide, golden eyes below his magnifying hood. He must have looked profoundly stupid partnered with his surgical mask and bright blue hair net. “What did he say?”

“That was it, he just said to call him back as soon as he could,” she responded nervously.

“Doctor, the surgery’s almost completed if you–” one of his technicians began before being interrupted by the doctor.

“No, I’ll never leave the operating room until the procedure is finished. Don’t worry about me, continue your focus on the patient.” But for the first time in Law’s entire professional life, his focus was everywhere but the patient. Why were you in the emergency room? Why were you taken from work? What in the world had happened?

Were you having another miscarriage?

No matter how hard he tried, he could not bring his focus back to the unconscious patient on the table in front of him. He felt like a ghost out of his own body, merely observing his rigid frame standing amongst his colleagues, frozen in time and place, glued to the cold tiled floor. Petrified. Chills were creeping up and down his vertebrae, spreading out to the very tips of his fingers, making him wish he could run. Run as fast as he could, run to the next building to where the emergency department was and run through every room to find you. He needed to find you.

The surgery could not have ended sooner. As soon as he was given the clear that the patient was in the recovery ward, he was sprinting with all of his might through the halls of the cardiac ward, out through the lobby, and into the bright summer sun that seemed to be mocking him in his frantic state. His lab coat trailed behind him and passing nurses and patients jumped out of his way as he barreled down the bright sidewalk of the hospital complex, passing small bundles of blooming flowers that almost shook with how fast his feet were carrying him. He felt like his heart might evacuate from his chest, or that he would surely lose his lunch with the stress of the unknown.

He rounded a corner and entered the emergency wing through a back entrance using his ID, sprinting to the nearest nurse’s desk barely catching his breath. The young woman behind the counter, caught off guard by his sudden burst into the space, was staring at the man with wide, blue eyes, her fingers frozen mid-typing on her mechanical keyboard.

“T… Trafalgar. Where,” was all he was able to gasp out as he clung to the counter catching his breath. He never was much of an athlete.

The young nurse hurriedly picked through the screen of her computer monitor. “Room 114.”

“Thank you,” he wheezed as he pushed himself off again, this time speed walking through the large corridors of the emergency room, not wanting to cause an issue with the attending doctors. He passed by empty gurneys and folded wheelchairs, idle medicine carts and nurses chatting with one another, another ordinary day for them. Room 114 seemed so far away.

Finally, the number appeared on the wall to his right. The door was wide open, multiple bodies hunched over the bed. Shachi and Ikkaku bolted upright from their chairs, mouths open about to speak to Law, but he pushed past them and into the crowd of nurses.

Your wrists were strapped to both handles of the bed you occupied, your eyes squeezed shut and an oxygen mask was forcefully strapped to your face, so tight your skin was visibly pinching through the hard elastic straps. The hose extending from the mask and into an on-board oxygen monitoring machine seemed so foreign on your beautiful face. A few heart rate electrodes were placed on your chest, picking up a well above average heartbeat. Your feet were weakly flailing under the covers as multiple nurses had their hands on you, assessing your blood pressure, your oxygen, hands on your abdomen, your legs, your breasts.

Law saw red.

“BACK THE FUCK UP,” he shouted, finally drawing attention to himself from the surrounding nurses. Hospital etiquette could fuck off for all he cared. His wife had her wrists bound. “GET AWAY FROM HER.”

“Doctor, please,” a man from beside your bed rushed forward toward the cardiac surgeon, placing his hands on his shoulders. “Please don’t yell-”

“Why the hell is she tied to the bed?!” he demanded, every fiber of his being forcing him to maintain at least some level of composure. Behind him, Ikkaku grabbed Shachi’s wrist and dragged him out of the room, not wanting to put their friend under any more stress.

“She was thrashing in the ambulance, we needed to restrain her,” the male nurse explained, attempting to push Law back from your bed.

Law looked past the nurse’s shoulder and screamed once more. “I SAID GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM HER.”

A much larger male nurse stood up from his place around your bed. When he stepped aside, his legs revealed a bright red biohazard container on the ground, a mere glimpse of the pants you were wearing that morning peeking into Law’s field of view.

“Doctor, calm down or I’m going to call security,” the bigger man threatened, stepping toward Law and giving his shoulders a firm shove backwards. He was built less like your average nurse and more like a basketball power forward, and the force of his hands against Law’s shoulders sent the black-haired surgeon stumbling backward.

“Don’t tell me to calm down,” he seethed. “What kind of nurse ties a patient to the bed when they’re panicking, huh?! Is that what they’re teaching you ingrates?! Tying a panicking woman to a bed to keep her still?!”

He forced his way past the larger nurse, much to the man’s discontent, and pushed through the other employees surrounding your bed. His first action was to loosen the straps of the oxygen mask on your face, giving your skin room to breathe. His deft hands ripped the velcro blood pressure cuff off of your bicep, tossing it back to a nurse who had stepped away, shocked by his actions. The oxygen monitor on your finger was next, followed by the restraint on your left hand, which fell limp next to your body. Your wedding ring was missing.

“Where’s the ring?” Law asked, forcing the blood oxygen monitor into the hands of the same nurse who took the cuff from him.

“What ring?” the basketball nurse asked, visibly angry with the doctor’s intrusion.

“The wedding ring on her left hand. Where the hell is it?”

A very small, meek voice piped up from across your bed. “It was removed in the ambulance because the paramedic was afraid she’d hurt herself with it.”

“Hurt herself, or hurt you?” snarled Law referring to the confused gaggle of nurses that had come into contact with his wife, already fed up with whatever excuses they were giving him. If he was more rational, he could argue that they were simply doing their jobs, but even from his standpoint, what they were doing to you was clearly too much. “I want every single one of you out of this room, and I want an attending doctor here immediately. I need one of you to find that damn ring and bring it back to me. Don’t make me ask twice.”

A few nurses took the opportunity to scramble from the room, visibly frazzled by the surgeon’s fit of rage. The two male nurses from prior, however, stood their ground.

“You’re not in our department, doc, I’m afraid we can’t take orders from you.” The larger nurse crossed his arms over his chest in defiance as Law stood between your body and the man.

“Then take my directions as the family member of a patient. Get. The hell. Out.” If Law were to see himself, he’d have absolutely no idea where this authoritative side of him came from. He was never one for verbal or physical confrontation, more used to shutting down and bottling in his feelings than displaying them outright, and never would he ever think to get in the face of an extended colleague, but now was not the time for rational thought.

The first nurse to put his hands on Law placed a hand on the shoulder of his fellow nurse, pulling him toward the door. The larger man finally relented and followed his coworker out into the hallway and around the corner out of sight. Silence had finally settled over the room and Law rushed to the other side of your bed to unstrap your right wrist from the metal barrier. Your heart rate on the monitor was slowly starting to even out, but was still maintaining a fairly erratic pace. His new position allowed him to get a glimpse into the red biohazard container that was improperly placed next to your bed. Your pants, the ones you had purchased when out with your friends a few weeks prior and that you were excited to finally wear to work, were completely soaked with bright red blood. The rest of your clothing was in the bucket, specks of blood on your socks, and the lower portion of your flowy summer shirt. He shoved the bucket out of the way with the ball of his shoe, forcing down the nausea that crawled up his throat.

He placed his hand on your forehead, leaning over you, his face contorted in an agony that mirrored your own.

Your eyes slowly opened, your body completely spent and exhausted. He barely wanted to know what kind of ambulance ride you had endured that had rendered your usually-energetic and upbeat form into a shell of your former self. Your irises were filled with sorrow, and your eyes immediately began welling with tears at the sight of your husband standing above you. You gasped into the oxygen mask, almost choking on the breath of cold, spicy air that flowed through the hose and forced its way into your body. Law was quick to pull the mask off, breaking every form of protocol he was familiar with. He knew his outburst and actions easily risked his integrity as a high profile surgeon, but as he took in the sight of you, completely burnt out, humiliated, scratched up from the binding on your wrists and straps from the mask on your face, he couldn’t find the time to care about his integrity anymore.

Finally free from the confines of the mask, you sucked in a shaky breath, heavy, salty tears flowing down your cheeks like a waterfall. You weakly reached a hand up to his, and he took it in both of his warm, calloused ones, clenching you tightly, funneling all of his love into you.

“Law…” you tried to speak, but your voice came out more like a croak. He felt his heart shatter, splintering into toxic pieces of fiberglass that ripped at his flesh, that stung the soul and pierced the very heart he gave to you. Your lips were violently quivering as your body shook with suppressed sobs, not having any more energy to scream. All you were able to do was mouth the words, ‘I’m sorry.”

Law’s resolve shattered. Whatever was left of his pride, his dignity, his status as your strong, unmoving, supportive husband, was fractured. He crumpled above you, his legs shaking as his head fell to your trembling chest, his hands that held your own remaining close to his own lungs as the tears he had wanted to cry for the past two years of trying for a baby finally escaped from his eyes. He sniffled, snot rapidly pooling in his sinuses as a result of his tears, but he continued to hold your trembling hand in his as he bit his lip so hard it stung, the scorching hot tears leaving his eyes feeling like trails of magma down his skin. The smell of hospital sheets did not belong on you.

The world seemed to implode in on your weak form in the hospital bed, your husband’s defeated body hunched over your own.

A crackled, broken sob exited his lungs.

#x reader #reader insert #fem reader #law x reader #trafalgar law x reader #one piece x reader #op x reader #trafalgar d water law x reader #trafalgar d water law #trafalgar law #i'm losing you

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cuddl3s4shur1 · 10 months

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•𝐎𝐁𝐒𝐄𝐒𝐒𝐄𝐃 𝐁𝐔𝐒𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒•

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐍𝐆: Earth 42 Miles x F! Y/N

𝐏𝐀𝐑𝐓 𝟏: 𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐆𝐈𝐑𝐋 𝐈𝐍 𝐓𝐎𝐖𝐍, 𝐌𝐀𝐒𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓

𝐒𝐂𝐄𝐍𝐀𝐑𝐈𝐎:Miles owns a business to help with his job as The prowler, he gets a new assistant thats trying to end his marriage .

𝐀/𝐍: I was scrolling on tiktok and let’s just say , I got some inspiration. Lowkey got bored towards the end also it dosent have the much spanish which is ny fault

𝐖𝐀𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆:Cussing,Spanish might be a little choppy ( blame google) IM TRYING YALL IM TRYING For the story HE US AGED UP

Inspired by : Obsessed-Movie and Some random TikTok I saw .

You were at home relaxing ,I mean you couldn’t do that much sense you were 6 months pregnant.

You are waiting fir your husband to come home . You haven’t seen him all day since he goes to work so early.

You hear keys jingle at the door , who could it be…. It’s your husband. He smiles as he sees you getting up to greet him. “. ¿Cómo está mi mamá bebé descalza? (Hows my barefoot baby mama going )“ he jokes to you . “Im doing well baby daddy “ you joke back to him.

“ Cómo te fué en el trabajo ( how did it go at work)“ you ask him as you penguin walk to the couch.

“it was good but rico is on a family vaction, así que tengo que contratar temporalmente a alguien( So I have to hire someone temporarily)“ he tells you

“ok well you know , contratar a alguien que sepa hacer el trabajo (hire someone who knows how to do the job)“ you tell him.

he nods and heads to the bedroom as he stsrt to undo his tye.

You continue to relax , the baby starts to kick your stomach “baby come get your daughter “ you laugh .

“ Qué está haciendo ella ahora(What is she doing now)“ he asks , he walks out of the bedroom in sweatpants and a tank top and sits on the couch next to you .

“Digamos que le gusta patear (Let’s just say she likes to kick)” you say . “Sound like she might like track , cross country or soccer “ he says “I’m thinking soccer, she kicks really hard “ Yall both laugh.

“I need a break from work, you know how i said we are temoraroy hiring people“ he asks you . “Yes babe“ he tells you . “Hiring today was horrible I don’t think people was reading the qualifications for this job like at all “ he tells you , you start to chuckle.

“What happened,” you ask him .

“So this guy comes in , he sits down so I’m like “do you have any experience with research and finance “

So he like “to be honest no, mi mamá dijo que están contratando y no me quiere en su sótano (my mom mama said they hiring and she tired of me living in her basement )“

so I’m like dang ok . “Do you have any experience with cleaning because we have a janitor job” I tell him

“yeah my moms she made me clean and wash dishes , she made me wash the floor and the walls“ he told me

“Ok , I’ll contact you in two weeks to let you know about the janitor job” I told him

“Yo man thanks “ he said then he walked out .

“Baby , that man was so honest” he says he also made me want to laugh.

“That was definitely something“ you tell him

“I'm going to start with our dinner, tonight we are having chicken with rice “ he says and smiles . “Yum” you tell him

“Voy a ser chef’to(I’m going to be a chef) “ he laughs

“Mhm, tengo mi propio Gordon Ramsey( Mhm , I got my own Gordon Ramsey )you joke

“No no, Soy mejor que eso(I’m better than that)he says .

“oh is that so ,Yo seré el juez de eso(I’ll be the judge of that) “ you tell him.

“Cariño, recibí una llamada del tío( Baby I got a call from uncle), he probably talking about business “ he says . “That’s fine you can answer “ you tell him.

Miles starts talking with his uncle , basically talking about business and other stuff . You usually work him , since you guys are duo “Mrs. Prowler and Mr. Prowler. From then till now , you have experienced all of that job has for offer and you don’t have want that while your pregnant.

He hangs up the phone and really starts cooking . “Baby I got an assistant “ he smiles . “Uncle Aaron chose her and the assistant starts tomorrow “ he says . “That’s good that means you don’t have to worry about hiring “ you say

“Yup and that’s what I like ,Estoy de vuelta en el negocio, cariño(Im back in business baby). “ he says you smile.

“Alright business man how’s the cooking going “ you ask him .

“My bad , ill start now ,No puedo matarte de hambre (I can't starve you) “ he jokes

“At least you know “ you told him.

He cooked and you guys would eat dinner together .

But little did miles know that tommorow he got an assitant from ....

Hell

𝐒𝐄𝐑𝐈𝐄𝐒 𝐓𝐀𝐆𝐋𝐈𝐒𝐓: @not-aya @html-nae @khamanix

#prowler x reader #the prowler #miles morales prowler #prowler miles morales #atsv prowler #prowler miles #prowler miles x reader #prowler miles morales x y/n #prowler #earth 42 miles x you #earth 42 miles morales x reader #earth 42 #earth 42 miles x reader #earth 42 miles morales x black!reader #earth 42 miles morales #earth 42 miles #earth 42 miles angst #earth 42 miles fluff

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rusmii · 6 months

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Can I request a oneshot where Dazai has a dream ab reader ( fem iydm) and it’s rlly detailed ( the dream ) and everything feels real? And when he awoken she was sleeping beside him which did not help his situation.

๋࣭ ⭑dream surreal ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁

osamu d. x fem!reader

╰ back to navi

syp: dazai can't help but overthink a fight that might never happen. but somehow learns how to respect you as a person even more now.

tw//: dazai centric(no literally y/n is nowhere to be seen during most of it), timeline jumps a bit(a lot at the end), arguments, it's implied that dazai is nonchalant asshole whenever an argument happens, hurt/comfort, learning experience, dazai accidentally tortures himself in his sleep, mentioned drug, im kinda too tired to tag everything but since its dazai yall know the drill, i'll leave the rest up to interpretation lmk if im missing any tags

♡: IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK ME SO LONGGG but i rlly did not like how i wrote this.. did not go the way i wanted and i tried fixing it but didn't wanna postpone it anymore so i hope i didn't dogshit it😭🤕

wc: 6k

dazai hums to himself, skipping on the way home from work. today was your guys' 3rd anniversary, and the two of you had reserved dinner at the beachside in Yokohama. it wasn't expensive, but it didn't have to be with it having more sentiment value. it's where the two of you had your first date after all.

he fishes through his pockets to grab his keys, the tiny chinkle dangling in the air as he unlocks the door. as soon as he opened the door, he kicked off his shoes and ran into your shared bedroom, "belladonna!! are you excited for-"

"osamu." you said with venom laced in your tone. dazai stopped mid sentence, his arms now loose to the side as he stood by the entrance of the doorway. "hm?" he tilts his head, "what's the matter, bella?" dazai asks. he noticed an envelope in your hands, and pictures scattered across the bed you were standing in front of.

he could feel your glare boring holes into his soul. "don't bella me. the hell is all this?!" you nearly yell despite your close distance with each other. he looked at you with a confused face. what could have made you so mad that you were practically screaming in his face for... oh.

as dazai stepped closer to the bed he also saw the pictures more clearly.

it was pictures of him from his mafia days, along with pictures of his closest companions. ango, chuuya, mori, kouyou, the old man and oda. his breath is caught in his lungs as he stares at oda's picture. it had 'couldn't be saved' , 'RIP' , and other similar things written in a thick black marker.

there were also other multiple pictures that were taken of him murdering or torturing people from his teenage years. he bit the inside of his cheek, he remembered all those moments, the moments he couldn't take back or erase from his memory. everything was there. from the moment mori found him and brought him to his clinic, to chuuya and him meeting for the first time, and to when oda was dying in his arms.

everything was there, and he couldn't deny it. the evidence of who he really was- was shining through the roof, and he heard you opening the envelope you were hiding earlier.

he watched your movements like a hawk, watching as the contents of the envelope spilled onto the bed. there were very few bullets he used to kill his victims, the gun used; all dirty and worn down(he's pretty sure it's still broken), the drugs he's taken; the empty bottles lay around as the syringes with empty needles bounce off the bed, and lastly a paper.

you held it up, and his body went stiff as you read the contents. "dazai osamu's list of crimes. 1073 in total." dazai pursed his lips into a thin line. whoever was documenting everything couldn't get his crime count right. he committed more than 1073 crimes in total. but you didn't have to know that, did you? not when you were freaking out about his fraud.

he chuckles to himself, wait till you find out about his killings.

"what's so funny?" you squint your eyes. "nothing, but... wow.." he says, astonished as he picks up a photo of oda's orphaned children. just before they went boom. "whoever recorded every one of my moves did one hell of a job! we should invite them to our dinner date to applaud them, don't ya think [name]?" he laughs heartily.

if looks could kill, he'd for sure be near earth's core with how intense your glare was. "[name]?" he asks as you grab your phone and charger, going to the closest to grab the nearest jack you could find. "[name!]" this time, it was dazai whose voice had gone serious, "what are you doing??"

"what's it look like?" you spat back. he bit back the urge to tell you that you were overreacting and that he's a changed man, so he wouldn't ever act as he did back in the port mafia.

too bad this was dazai osamu. he didn't care about the consequences if he didn't have to think about it. you'd always come back running into his arms after a week anyway. "so what if I acted like a teenage dirtbag? I've changed, so shouldn't that matter now; and only now?"

you gawked at him like he just said something stupid, which he did. "did you just seriously say that?"

"what's the big deal?" he shrugs his shoulders, "what's done, been done."

"what's done, been done?" you repeat, "what's done, been done?!" you yell. "this- that's murder osamu! how could you just... act so nonchalant about it!?" you couldn't believe this was who your osamu really was. you'd always assume that he had a rough past, and you weren't wrong, but you got the story wrong.

"it is, but you get over it quickly. trust me on that."

you stare at him. how could you trust someone who's been lying to you the entire time you've been together? lived together? breathe the same air and become intimate with each other? your head was starting to turn from this boom of information. "It's the past. get over it." his voice now low and threatening. was this the same voice he used for his teenage dirtbag years?

"it doesn't involve you. it shouldn't and never involve you." dazai softens his voice once he realizes what kind of tone he is using. "ever," he clenched his fists, "so drop the topic."

your gaze never left the list of crimes that you let fall to the floor. you shook your head, acknowledging that this relationship wasn't going to work. not when this relationship was built on lies. "I'm sorry, dazai." you used his last name this time.

"so this is it?" dazai says, "we're ending things because I did stupid shit back then? is that it?" he presses the questions on you, but you ignore him as you slip your jacket on, opting to get your stuff later. "no dazai."

"then what?!" his voice was starting to become more frantic as soon as he realized that this might really be it. this wasn't like your usual arguments with each other. it always ends up with you crying and dashing out the door, leaving for a week, then coming back without him ever needing to apologize or talk about it.

"tell me!!" he stalks up to you and grabs your arm, but you shove him off you. "think about how I feel once in a while, you selfish jackass!!" you scream and stomped out of the apartment. dazai trailed after you until he stopped at the doorway of your guy's apartment.

"there's nothing to think about when you're a mindless, brainless worm who thinks they know what they're doing!"

you gasped at that. was that what he really thought of you? "oh! well, I'm sorry I'm too stupid for a genius like you!" you stopped midway in front of the door, "in fact, why don't you find a one night- bed to bed bitch who's willing to sit on her ass and half listen to your bitching for some cash!!"

and that was it. you walked away as he yelled at your back, not once trying to come after you. you'd return to him after a week of anger. he knows you will.

Day 1:

he marked the date mentally in his head. he always made sure to keep track of your fights. since today was the 1st day, he wasn't worried about it in the slightest bit. but he groaned. his head throbbed as he sat up on his bed, taking in the leisure sun.

it was about time to head into work, but he was already a minute late, so why rush?

he dipped his feet out of the bed, walking into the bathroom as he prepared to shower. the sound of the water running was heard as he stripped naked. once he checked that the water temperature was to his liking, he stepped inside and sighed, the water running down him, giving him a slight euphoric sensation.

for a moment or two, dazai was relishing in the water. his head was tilted back as he closed his eyes.

his mind whisked him back to the night before. the fight you two had was nothing like the others, where it'd usually formed from a petty squabble. this time, it came directly from an unknown source, and he'd like to know who recorded his timeline of events.

"come back! you don't know what the hell you're doing!!!"

he could hear himself screaming at your back. his voice loud and clear, but his bungled mind and rigid body said otherwise. he physically cringed inside the shower as he recalled every little thing he said to you.

"you need me! you can't leave me!!"

"[name], are you really going to leave me?! after you said you'd never leave!? damn hypocrite!!"

he cringed at that. of course, you'd never leave him. why would you? you love him after all! you'd never leave him! he didn't have to worry because you'd never leave him!

right?

he let out a long breath and banged his head on the wall. well shit. maybe he should really apologize this time.

"dazai-san!" he heard his subordinate call out to him, "hmmmmnn?? what is it atsushi-kun?~" dazai couldn't sleep a wink the past night, but despite all that, his cheerful self still remained for the day.

he was currently at the agency, sleeping his ass off as he watches the tanizaki siblings go at it

"um, a package has arrived for you." the young boy holds out a small box— just a plain brown box with his name on it. To Dazai, from.

he took a look at the box, and his eyes wandered down to where it was sent from. "who sent it?" he asks, taking the box from him and setting it down on his desk. by this point, almost everyone at the agency had stopped what they were doing to nose into this situation. even kunikida had stopped writing and looked over from his desk. "dazai, what is that?"

"why, a box, of course!" he laughs and ranpo sniggers from the side, "open it, you'll regret it if you don't."

dazai became intrigued at what the lollipop sucking boy said. it wasn't everyday ranpo would warn them of something so trivial. he cut open the box from a box cutter he asked from kunikida; him complaining about how dazai never is prepared for anything.

"yeah, yeah." dazai brushes his lecture off as he opens the box, "look! it's.. a note.?" now that got his attention. he stares at it for a bit as he holds it up, inspecting the strange note that was written on black paper, the ink in white.

an argument will ensue.

what the fuck? "dazai-san, what does that mean..?" Atsushi, who was already by his side, asked out loud, "I don't know.."

was it referring to yesterday? dazai felt as if his saliva was stuck in his throat. he bit his lip as he recalled the fight you two had last night. "dazai, what's wrong? is everything okay?" this time it was from kunikida, who looked a little worried from his lack of expression.

"yeah." he whispers below his breath, "yep!" his voice now as loud as it was when he barged into the office late, "everything is A-OK!!"

"are you sure?" yosano asks, not convinced. dazai winks at her as he gives her a thumbs out, tongue sticking out. she sighs, knowing that she isn't going to get an answer from him. "well, if it isn't bothering you, then it doesn't bother us."

kenji nods in agreement. "if anything happens, don't forget to tell us." kyouka follows up, dazai smiles, and soon everyone is back to working like normal.

well, dazai is sleeping as usual.

Day 2:

dazai has woken up to the sound of someone repeatedly knocking on his door. at first, he thought it was a door to door salesman and went back to sleep, hoping that they'd get the hint and go away. but when the knocking persisted and didn't stop, he groaned, getting up from bed.

he stares at the box sitting on his nightstand, the note still inside of it. he wondered if this mysterious ghost watched every single one of your guy's previous fights.

just as he was about to grab the box again, the knocking turned into banging. dazai jumped from the sudden change of pace and hissed at the cold, hitting him as he rolled out of bed. "coming, I'm coming!" he yells from the hall of the apartment.

the banging still didn't stop, and he started to think about every single curse word he spewed at the person as soon as he opened the door.

"what?!-"

but unfortunately he doesn't get to do so, because as soon as he opens the door he is met with nobody.

"-the hell??" he replaces and looks from right to left, checking to see if anybody ran off. he didn't notice anything off, but he saw a sign that read: look down, with an arrow pointing to the ground.

as dazai looked down, he saw another plain brown box on his doormat. one that you'd absolutely insisted that this lonely place needs. he crouched down to inspect it, making sure that it wasn't an enemy trap before picking it up and slamming his door shut with his foot.

the box was bigger, not as big but certainly not as small as the one from yesterday.

he placed the box down onto the kitchen island and walked around to find a knife. as soon as he found a small knife, he turned around to cut the tape down the middle.

the sound of the knife cutting through it; the flimsy flaps of the cardboard hovered up and down. he sets down the knife and pulls open the flaps, being met with another note and a few photos.

he picks up the note first, reading the contents.

she's upset. brush it off.

dazai threw the note to the side, not wanting to overanalyze so early in the morning. he then picks up the photos, there were two of them.

one of him and the other of you.

the photo of you was when you received a yellow envelope and the same plain brown box from the doorstep, and the other was a photo of him smiling as he held up a few things from his mafia days.

brush it off.

his eyebrows furrow as he remembered the last line of the note. "ughh!!" he groans, "it's too early for this!"

kunikida looked like he was about to burst a fuse, "dazai!" he called out to the brunette who was lazing around on the couches. "hm?" dazai looked up from where he was at, eyes going blank when he saw the red-faced kunikida stomping towards him. "get back to work!!" he yells down.

"eww!! kunikida-kun's spit particles are all over me now!!!" dazai waves his arms around, "i've been infected by the W-V!!!"

"huh?! W-V?!" kunikida spurts out, whipping out his notebook and grabbing a nearby pen, "tell me, what else do i have to look out for when identifying the symptoms?"

"hmm, let's see. since i've just gotten it, like- a second ago, the first symptom would be that you'll feel veeeeerrryyyy tired early in the mornings!!"

scribbling could be heard, "i see. what else?"

"next would be how stressed you'd get! i mean, seriously!!- kunikida, have you ever gotten yourself checked?!" dazai lets out an exasperated gasp. "oh my.. kunikida-kun...!"

"what!? what is it??"

dazai stays silent, his eyes widened, a feigned fearful expression on his face as kunikida dreads his answer. "you've been..."

"infected..!" dazai whispers the last part and kunikida's eyes blew wide open, "huh?!-"

"just kidding." dazai yawns and kunikida threw him across the room.

"what even was W-V, anyways dazai-san?" atsushi suddenly appears in his view, "hah.. atsushi is so swirly!! haha!!" he bursts out laughing, and atsushi just sighs.

"forget it, it's just another thing he made up." kunikida pushes his glasses back into place, "dazai, stop brushing things off. you'll regret it one day."

the said man stays silent, watching the blonde man walk back to his desk. whether atsushi noticed his silence or not, the white-haired boy sticks out his hand with a smile.

"i think kunikida-san is right. please don't brush the problem off."

Day 3:

"walk back safe!" atsushi waves to dazai, kyouka nodding her head, and dazai smiles at them; in acknowledgment of their words.

stepping out from the elevator, he couldn't help but think about how peaceful his day has been today.

and the words that kunikida and atsushi had said yesterday. don't brush it off. just like the note. he didn't know if it was just a coincidence or if it was related; dazai sighed as he walked past the florist shop that he used to always stop by when you used to work there. it held some great memories of his failed attempts at flirting and your coworkers hyping him up.

he looked at the 'closed' sign on the glass door: closed today! sorry for the inconvenience!:(

that's weird. usually, they were open every day. dazai glanced to his sides, stepping closer to the glass door after he made sure no one was there to witness it. he pressed his face against the glass, peering into the dark shop.

the flowers stuffed in bouquets, and potted plants scattered all around. there were rows of flowers and plants aligned on the aisles, a simple description of it under each of them. he scanned around for a few minutes before finally eyeing the flower he was looking for. the flower was your favorite flower.

he sucked in a breath as he remembered how happy you were when he gave you those flowers for your guy's third date. how surprised you were when he remembered what your favorite flower was. sure you had multiple, but there was this one flower you could name on the top of your head with ease.

it made him smile, knowing that you were happy. at that time, he didn't know that your happiness was his.

after staring for a couple minutes, dazai knew it was about time to head back, so he glanced one last time at the flower before turning on his heels and leaving for good.

a few twists and turns, and soon, dazai was back at the apartment. a shortcut! he'd like to call it. 'zai, that's stupid.' you'd laugh every time he found a new way to shorten the shortcut. 'whaaat?? it's my specialty!' he'd always reply back.

bickering would always ensue afterward, but just like all the other times, it was over within a week.

as dazai made his way down the hall of the apartment complex, he noticed someone turn down the hall and disappeared from plain sight. he didn't bother to chase after them, thinking it was another resident of the building.

he let out another groan. "of course, it'd show up at one point." he spat under his breath, speed walking closer to his door to pick up the plain brown box. as he was about to pick it up, he stopped his tracks. his mind immediately jumped back to the mysterious person who turned the corner. could it have been him?

he crouched down to the box's level, carefully picking it up to check it out. rotating the box, he shook it slightly, feeling the object inside moving.

'it's light.' he confirms. he looked back at the end of the hall where the mysterious person went to and got up with the box clutched in his arms. he stalks down the hall, his footsteps heavy as it echoed through the silent hall.

"shit." he says once he's reached the end, "what the fuck..?"

the wall that's staring back at him; mocks him. he turns around to find the same dead-end wall on the opposite end. the stairs down being elsewhere.

dazai bit his tongue, slowly backing away as he retreats back to his place. now, he knew he had problems with his head, but one thing for sure was that he did not hallucinate. and the note in front of him, stuck to his door, confirmed that all right.

don't run, face the problem. open the box. remember. happy, is she?

dazai ripped the taped paper from his door and unlocked it, almost ripping the door off its hinges. locking the door as soon as he got inside, dazai set the box down next to the other brown box on the kitchen island. he moved around it to grab a knife and walked back to stab it open.

he didn't particularly care about its contents anymore; having been fed up with the daily gifts his admirer gave him.

opening the box, he was met with a flower and another note.

he couldn't pay attention to the note. not when the flower was staring right up at him, a few petals already having been scattered around inside the box. the flower in question was your favorite flower. the stem was cut off, but the petals still retained their color. it must have been recently that the stem was cut off.

dazai slowly picked up the note. it was something he didn't expect: do you feel guilty yet?

he froze. so whoever this mysterious ghost was surely had to know about his situation. but the question was, how, though? was there a break-in? were there cameras around that he didn't know about?

that was impossible, dazai would've known if he was being watched. he was being thrown for a loop, not understanding the motive of this person. was it trying to get him to apologize? for which fight? he didn't know, but now he needed to figure it out.

as he walked to the bedroom, another note was plastered on the bedroom door.

the guilty verdict.

Day 4:

dazai had decided to take the rest of the week off. when asked why, he shrugged them off, only answering in shallow replies. they were worried, of course, but didn't want to push him. he was dazai after all; you don't question dazai.

but in actuality, dazai was focusing all his attention on his secret admirer.

he pins the notes to the corkboard, the pictures, and the flower next to their respective notes. colored yarn used as lines are a jumbled mess; crossing each other. everything was dated as well as the plain brown boxes sitting beneath the corkboard.

dazai also had a whiteboard, small but will make do.

he starts by writing down every encounter and event that could clue him closer to the culprit.

• 1st - note appears from the agency - small plain box - nothing inside • 2nd - note appears from his doormat - slightly larger than the box from 1st - 2 pics - repeated knocking • 3rd - note appears from doormat - mysterious suspect runs - dead-end - note on door - note on bedroom door - [name]'s favorite flower

that was all for now. it had been three days (four if you count today). he was anxious, awaiting the next arrival of the box. from early sunrise to the bright afternoon, there hadn't been a single commotion or hint of the next note.

dazai starts pacing back and forth in the room, his hair all shriveled and messy from the frustrated hands that ruffled through his hair.

it had been an hour after he had fallen asleep. he didn't know when or how, but he had the sense to wake up; his chest heavy as a weight sits atop him. he couldn't move, and by now, dazai could feel himself travel down memory lane.

the dark ceiling of his place; a place that he would have never considered calling home before he joined the mafia. he shivers in the cold, the lack of heating and insulation in general made him sweat like he had just gotten fighting with chuuya, and the chilly coldness of the crisp air hitting him like a storm on random nights during the monsoon season.

night after night, he would always never have enough sleep. the container being too dark for him to properly rest; the young teen is always on the lookout for nearby assassins. at some point during one of his usual sleepless nights, dazai felt a strange weight on top of him as he dozed off.

snapping himself awake, he was met with eyes that matched his, the shadow that loomed over him had no emotions, but his words spoke through dazai's core.

dazai's eyes became wide as he shot up from his spot, scrambling to sit upright as he narrowed his eyes up to the look-alike of him sitting right in front of him. "what— who..— you're me." he manages out, feeling the words clog inside his throat.

"i'm you!" the shadow happily announces, clapping its hands.

the shadow leers at dazai, the wide blood filled eyes looking right into his soul; through him as if he's reading him. "so?" dazai asks as he crosses his arms, "what did you come to tell me this time?"

the shadow titters for some time before inching closer; and closer; and closer; and closer.. until dazai can feel the cold air fanning him. "to tell you what to say whenever you're in the wrong-" it's finger poking at his chest; his heart, "-sorry."

he moves his finger up slowly, "that's all you have to say." the shadow whispers, the finger now pointing to the center of dazai's head, "or would you rather have her gone?"

"hah!" dazai guffaws, "do you really think-"

"were you thinking?"

dazai glares silently, his narrowed eyes flickering between the bed and anywhere else but him. "of course I was." he says, and it laughs, this time mockingly. "ah yes, of course you were thinking, totally thinking!!" — "shut up!" dazai screams, throwing his pillow at the shadow who disappears on impact. dazai breathed heavily as he closed his eyes, his head lolled to the side as he succumbed to slumber.

Day...

dazai sat alone on the chair, his meal getting cold as he waited for you. normally, you'd do the cooking, but this time around, he decided to do it.

it had been two weeks since you left; there was no need for a calendar if he marked every single date mentally anyway. dazai stabs the egg on his plate, the yolk oozing out of it. he had his phone charged and on at full volume at all times, waiting for a call or text, but he had received nothing.

it had been radio silent from you for the past two weeks, and it was killing him from the inside.

the silence had been deafening in his once cozy home. most of your stuff was here, but you still didn't make any indication of coming anywhere near the place. he also hadn't received any notes from his suspicious lurker.

he sighs, maybe another week?

Month...

dazai sat alone on the chair, his meal getting cold as he waited for you. normally, you'd do the cooking, but this time around, he decided to do it.

it had been a month and a half since you left; there was no need for a calendar if he marked every single date mentally anyway. dazai stabs the egg on his plate, the yolk oozing out of it. he had his phone charged and on at full volume at all times, waiting for a call or text, but he had received nothing.

it had been radio silent from you for the past month, and it was killing him from the inside.

he sighs, maybe another month?

Year...

it had been close to a year since you left; there was no need for a calendar if he marked every single date mentally anyway. dazai stabs the egg on his plate, the yolk oozing out of it. he had his phone charged and on at full volume at all times, waiting for a call or text, but he had received nothing.

it had been radio silent from you for the past few months, and it was killing him from the inside.

he sighs, maybe another?

Years

dazai stares at his shaken self.

"what— who..— you're me." he manages out, feeling the words clog in his throat.

“i'm you!" dazai happily announces, clapping his hands.

dazai leers at him, his wide blood filled eyes looking right into his soul; through him as if he's reading him. "so?" he asks as he crosses his arms, "what did you come to tell me this time?"

dazai titters for some time before inching closer; and closer; and closer; and closer.. until he can feel the cold air fanning him. "to tell you what to say whenever you're in the wrong-" his finger poking at his chest; his heart, "-sorry."

he moves his finger up slowly, "that's all you have to say." dazai whispers, the finger now pointing to the center of his head, "or would you rather have her gone?"

"hah!" he guffaws, "do you really think-"

"were you thinking?"

he glares silently, his narrowed eyes flickering between the bed and anywhere else but him. "of course I was." he says, and dazai laughs, this time mockingly. "ah yes, of course you were thinking, totally thinking!!" — "shut up!" he screams, throwing his pillow at dazai who disappears on impact. he breathed heavily as he closed his eyes, his head fell to the side as he succumbed to slumber.

#765#567#

dazai opened his eyes, "[name]?" he asked in confusion, your figure in the tv that was in front of him. dazai found himself restricted and unable to move around, his arms and legs locked in place as the chair rocked with every movement.

he makes an annoyed sound, looking around for ways to escape, but there was nothing. dazai didn't know what kind of room this was. it was a solid plain black room filled with the void. it seemed as if he and the tv were floating in mid-air.

just then, the tv started flickering on and off, the screen glitching as the background played.

you were lazing around the house, propped on the couch, as you were mindlessly scrolling through your phone. for a minute or two, all the footage was just you laying on the couch. suddenly, the doorbell rang, and you immediately looked up with a scrunched up face. you weren't expecting any visitors this late into the night, so you assumed it was probably another door to door salesman. it wasn't until the knock came for a second time, then a third and so forth until you couldn't ignore it anymore. you got up to go confront whoever was annoying you this late at night.

suddenly, the tv was switched to a different channel. dazai could barely make out the two voices talking, the footage showing you and a shadowy person next to you. it was holding a yellow envelope, he didn't know what it was telling you but you seemed to be in disbelief as you were handed a light box filled with unknown contents.

another click, and the channel switched again. this time, it was back to where the other channel left off. you opened the door and were greeted with no one. looking around, you stepped out of the apartment a bit to scan the hall. much to your dismay, there was no one, and you had just been ding dong ditched. or at least that's what you thought before glancing down and noticed a plain brown box with a yellow envelope on it.

dazai screams from where he was, telling you not to pick it up yet. it was pointless, of course.

the channel is turned again, and it's an entirely new scenario. his yelling had stopped at that point, but it didn't ease his anxiousness. what was it going to play next? he could probably guess, but he wouldn't, wanting to witness it for himself.

he braces himself for whatever is going to play, finally feeling self-aware of everything all of a sudden. he could feel the cold, humid atmosphere surrounding him. the background noise of the tv; static.

he flicks his eyes everywhere, never leaving his sight on one thing.

dazai lets out a surprised sound when his eyes meet yours. your face in full view on the tv, the glitch having suddenly fixed itself as well as the static noise. it felt eerie as your teary face stared back at him.

"[name]?.." dazai calls out to you, "yes?" his eyes grew big, not expecting you to respond back to him.

dazai didn't know if he should keep talking or if he was starting to go crazy. "[name]?" he asks again, not believing that you were talking with him through the screen. you wipe your eyes, "what is it?"

"what's wrong, osamu?" this time, it was you asking the question. he stayed silent. "osamu?" you ask again, tilting your head as you leaned closer, your face zooming in on the screen, "hey, what's wrong? why do you look like that?"

when he didn't answer again, you lifted a hand and placed it somewhere. he didn't know where it was since it was out of frame, but he could feel the slight warmth of your touch on his hands. it was a weird feeling since both of his hands were still restrained. "osamu."

you kept calling out, "osamu-" — "i'm sorry."

it came out as a surprise for the two of you. your eyes were as wide as his, not expecting him to apologize out of the blue. "i'm sorry," he says again.

he could feel the other touch of your hand being placed onto his. "i'm sorry." this time, it was louder, his voice echoed throughout the void. your warm touch rubbing circles on his palms and the back of his hands. "i'm sorry." a broken sob left him, "im sorry; im sorry."

dazai didn't know what came over him. for some reason, he found himself unable to stop repeating his apology. it was so half assed, he could barely voice it out, and when he does, it comes out as a sob. he's sure that you could barely hear it, his voice being just above a mumble. "im- i don't know how to, i'm sorry." his head was hung low, tears dropping onto his lap; his arms and pants getting wet. he couldn't face you, not when he was snot ridden.

"you do know, and i'm proud of you." he could feel your faint lips on his forehead, a hand moving some of his bangs to the side. "don't cry samu', you're okay. you can do it, we can do it."

"what are we doing?" he sniffles.

"fixing our trust in each other."

dazai brought his head up, and your soothing voice matched the small smile you were giving him. your eyes so full of emotion and.. vulnerability. he felt shivers run down his spine, the eye contact you guys were making made him feel open. too open for his liking.

he wanted to turn away, shut down, and run away again. there was no fight, no argument, no running away if there was no problem, right? each turned down fight proved his logic to be true, the two of you always returning back to your usual routines as if the fight never happened a week ago. it was the perfect formula, a set one that the two of you established over the next few fights.

it was unfortunate that dazai would always reject your input and feelings; refusing to communicate with you because of his logic.

he didn't know what to say, all working gears in his brain stopped turning. everything was stuck, and he sat there, confused. "how?" he croaks out.

he could see your smile getting longer, the hope in your eyes brightening. "let's talk," both of your hands clamped around his, "together?"

it came out as a question, but it sounded happier.

"you're not mad?" he asked. "no, why would i be?" your soft expression remained. "because..." dazai faded off. he thought he would have known the answer to you confidently, but his genius self falters for a bit. "because.. you'll leave me anyway.."

"will always leave me, slamming the door in my face. leaving me like how everyone i tried opening up to left, died even."

by the time he's done with his rant, he's out of breath. he said it pretty fast, but you weren't his partner for no reason.

"guess even prodigies like you can be dumb as fuck sometimes." you deadpan. now that appalled dazai, "huh? what does that mean!" he felt insulted but at the same time he couldn't help but feel as if you were right.

you laugh to yourself, "osamu," you laugh, "is that what you think that i think?"

he was even more confused. why were you laughing?? this was a very serious matter, and you're just... making fun of him. "yes..? it's what everyone thinks of when they're with me."

"don't laugh!!!" he barks from the chair, "sorry! sorry!" you wipe the corners of your eyes. "what?" he pouts when he notices your distant stare.

"let's take a step back, 'kay?" you say, and suddenly the warmth of your hands disappears from his. take a step back? "don't think about it from what you've experienced. think about it from my perspective." he listens intently, taking in what you said.

"so.. you're not going to be mad at me?"

your lips curl a bit, "never. you don't have to tell me every single detail of your life, but i at least deserve the right to see you as vulnerable in front of me as i am to you."

he nods his head, finally starting to understand why you never came back after a week this time. the repressed feelings he forced you to hold back had exploded under its pressure, unable to pile anymore stress onto it. "i promise to do better for you, [name]- be better. i promise."

you gave him a teary-eyed smile, holding up your pinky, "promise?" dazai couldn't move due to his restraints but still held out a pinky nevertheless, "promise," he was looking at you so tenderly, "i promise."

the tv is turned off, and a time is displayed on it. he could hear beeping coming from somewhere. before he could try to identify where the sound was coming from and what was happening, dazai felt his slightly dried up tears roll down his cheek as he cracked his eyes open.

the beeping sound was coming from his right, and when he turned to over, he saw it was an alarm clock going off at the time you set for him to get up for work.

"what?.." he groans, wiping his wet eyes as he scans the room. it was still dark out, and the beeping kept going. "shut up." he hisses as he slammed his hand down on the alarm clock. he sighs, reaching over to your side of the bed. he knew that it was going to be another hopeless day of waiting for any calls and messages from you.

he attempted to grab more of the blanket and a pillow from your side but was met with something; someone already there. dazai jumps back surprised, not expecting anybody to be sleeping there. since it was still dark out, he couldn't really make out the shadowy person on his bed.

"hn.. dazai?" you groan, feeling him poke at your side. when you got no answer, you turned around in concern to see an upright dazai staring down at you in shock. "dazai?" you question him, slowly sitting up.

"you- you're back.."

you stare at him in confusion, "uh- i've been here?" he stares back. you could see the glisten in his eyes despite it being dark out. "dazai?" — "i'm sorry." he cries out all of a sudden.

you were being tackled onto your back, "what- dazai?! what's wrong??" you caught yourself before you fell off the bed, quickly wrapping your arms around him as you massaged his head.

"dazai! answer me!" you say, trying to push him off of you to no avail, "dazai!-" — "please don't leave." his voice was barely above a whisper, "just- stay. please. i'll talk to you.. when i'm ready."

you could tell he was in hysterics. you didn't know the reason why or how he came to be, but you laid there, giving his back and head gentle massages. "okay, i'll be right here with you then. you gave him a gentle kiss on his head, holding him in your embrace.

°° ©churuai ; don't repost my works to other sites, copy/plagiarize my works, or translate my works into a different language without my permission. if you intend to use most of my ideas from a post of mine, please don't forget to credit ♡

rbs and comments appreciated <3<3

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd x reader #dazai x reader #dazai #bsd dazai #idk what else to put #this oneshot was so bad im sorry anon forgive me😭🙏#[⋆⋆⋆] — runi's works ♡#[☆] — anon

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maneaterss · 1 year

Note

HIHIHI, your stories r soso cute and there’s a disrespectful lack of ney on here so I’m here to request 🙏.

a fluff w/ ney where he’s cooking smth for y’all and you randomly say marry me and he’s like 🧍 I FEEL LIKE THAT WOULD BE SO CUTE 💔💔

pairing: neymar jr x insert

summary: reader compliments neymar in a way that makes him blush.

cw: marriage mentioned (is that even like idk), cute neymar.

authors note: this is an insanely cute rec lawd. also i literally need to write more for neymar omg. AND GUYS IVE BEEN AVOIDING THE SMUT ONES UNTIL IM IN THE MOOD TO WRITE ITTTTT yall dont even know the type of willpower it takes to write good smut and i literally cannot so be patient w me!!! anyways keep uo the cute recs its adorable.

you came home from a hard day of work, you were starving and you just wanted to take your stupid heels off and go to bed, you could smell many different seasonings and the sizzling of a dish being cooked.

you peeked your head in the kitchen, the sight before you making you smile.

neymar had always been a good cook, you liked to cook for him but when he did it for you it was such a thoughtful gesture it made your heart flutter- you needed this every now and then, especially on a day like today.

"oi, bebe!" he noticed your gaze on him, dropping the wooden spoon as he rushed over to hug you. "how was your day so far?"

"good, im so tired." you kissed his cheek as you hugged him back, he held you for a minute. "what are you cooking?" you asked as your surroundings and senses came back.

"(your favorite dish)." he smiled cheekily, "i know mondays aren't easy." he still had his hands ok your hips for a moment until he rushed back to the stove, continue to mix the food.

you could tear up on the spot at his sheer thoughtfulness. "thats nice baby." you followed close behind him- taking your shoes off and placing them on the ground next to the chair you sat down on.

you say across from the stove, your nails tapping on the island. you looked around your shared apartment, you eyed him carefully.

he finally placed the meal in the over before leaning on the other side of the island, looking into your eyes as well.

"you're so kind." you said, "i just want to spend the rest of my life with you." you continued to look back him- not thinking much of the comment- but his face turned red as his smile grew.

"you want to marry me?"

you smiled at how simple he was, "eventually." you laughed, putting your hand over his.

this is criminally short but i had to post and im SO SORRY IT WAS SHORTTT. im so drained so i need to sleep but i promise ill post 2-3 long reqs tomorrow, again i am SOOOOO sorry. somethings better then nothing i hope!!!

#neymar angst #neymar headcanon #neymar fluff #neymar smut #neymar x you #neymar imagine #neymar imagines #neymar jr #neymar x reader #neymar

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1whore1gang · 5 months

Text

it’s the little things🤍

hey y’all! this is part 6!!

catch up HERE

sorry this took so long to get out to y’all, been working like crazy and had some writers block, BUT IM HERE TO FEED YALL

warnings: SMUT SMUT SMUT SMUT SMUT SMUT

MDNI!!!

Taglist: @gaymistakeboi@batw3nch@thedevillovesflowers@almightywdm@ghostslittlegf@sketchyfandomgirl@under-the-dirt@clear-your-mind-and-dream@darkangel4121@vreselia@llemes @stargaliz @rockcollector3000 @nottrosaxx

as always please yell at me if i forgot you!

You lay in your cot, your body aching from the long days of hard work. You had just gotten back from a shift, your phone ringing as your back hit the fabric. You had super shotty service, so a call coming throigh was a miracle.

“Hey baby, I hope you’re well.” You swiped to answer the call. It was your John.

“Hey honey, just tired as hell.” You chuckled a little as you laid on your side, placing your phone next to you.

“I know you don’t have much time to talk and need your rest but I wanted to not only hear your voice but let you know I met the babysitter today. She cleared the background check and she loves the boys.” You could hear his smile in his voice.

“That’s good.” You replied, your eyes closed as you felt your body relax to his voice.

“She’s young, 19. She’s a spritey thing, lots of energy. She’s bubbly and super great with the boys. Her name is Tia. I think she’ll be good for them, be able to keep up.” He sounded excited, and you were happy he’d found a girl you could trust to watch the boys.

“I’m glad babe, hopefully they don’t chase her away. How much is she charging? Is she staying on base?”

He chuckled, “I’m paying her so don’t you worry about the money doll, as for her, she’s staying in my room. I’m giving my room a deep clean and washing my sheets before I leave.”

“She’s sleeping in your bed?” You opened your eyes at this and propped yourself up on your elbow.

“Yeah, comfier than the couch.” He said it so casually, but it somewhat bothered you that some babysitter was sleeping in his bed before you were. Yes, you chose not to, but it still bothered you, the idea of a much younger woman sleeping in his sheets, using his room for herself. “Baby?”

His voice broke you out of your thoughts. “Yeah, but the couch isn’t too bad. I’ve been sleeping on it. I would prefer it over my current situation.” You heard John laugh a little.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be out there before you know it, I’ll make sure you stay comfy and get rested. Tia though-“ He continued to ramble on about how Tia did with the boys and what he thought of her. He spoke about how she’s coming again so he can give her a rundown on everything she’ll need to know, and make sure she doesn’t have any questions. He said he’s going to spend the day with her and the boys so she can get acquainted.

It bothered you a bit. You knew deep down it was nothing, John wouldn’t sleep with a 19 year old, nor would he cheat on you. Right?

“But, I’ll let you go my love, get some rest. I’ll see you in 4 days.” You big your goodbyes as he hung up.

You quickly fell into a deep sleep.

“Lieutenant! Get your ass up and get to your post!!” You woke up to Captain Snyder’s voice booming. “You’ve got 20 minutes until your shift, get moving.”

“Yes sir.” Your voice was hoarse as you arose from the rough cot and threw on the missing pieces of your uniform you didn’t sleep in. Your eyes were heavy as you hobbled to your post, taking the jeep to the embassy.

You noticed your soldiers were in a similar state? you were all starving and restless. Some soldiers had been sent home because of their sickness, being considered critical. You did your best not to push your squad, letting them take breaks and rest up, but more and more were falling ill, including yourself.

Unfortunately, being the leader, you weren’t allowed to go take a break or go rest up to feel healthy. You had to push through and manage, and that had caused you to become a shell of yourself. You had continued to lose weight, lose energy and motivation, even feeling i’ll yourself. You weren’t able to eat from lack of appetite, anything you ate came back up within an hour.

You felt like death, and you were scared for John to see you this way, but he was bringing backup to replace the soldiers who had been rushed to hospitals.

At night while you were watching transports, you dreamed of him getting off that plane, the way his arms would save you from the trouble you’d endured here.

The worst part of this mission though? Captain Snyders team was completely fine. They were all healthy, rested and none of them had fallen ill. They weren’t being pushed like your squad.

There was something fishy here and you couldn’t put your finger on it. You didn’t have the energy to even put thought into it.

You were so close to John’s arrival, only 36 hours until he arrived. You were on duty when you were checking someone into the embassy and you felt your field of vision turn black. You grabbed into Private Frag next to you as you felt yourself begin to collapse.

You woke up 32 hours later. Captain Snyder was in the med tent with you and the nurse. He looked pissed. “Lieutenant, nice of you to join us. What the hell were you thinking?! You have a crew to take care of!”

“I’m sorry sir, I haven’t been feeling myself lately.” Your voice came out so quietly, your voice lost somewhere.

“No excuses L.T. You’re here because I recommended you. Your commendable leadership in previous missions was what got you here. Your behavior on this mission has been unacceptable, and therefore you’ve been sentenced to 24 hour duty. You will watch the embassy starting tomorrow at noon, and finishing the following day at noon with no breaks.” You felt your breath catch, there was no way he expected you to do that in your condition. You could barely speak! Barely move!

“Sir, I don’t mean to talk back but-“

“Then don’t speak.” You felt the feeling of crying, but no tears came due to your dehydration. “You are allowed the rest of today to rest, but I want to see you well and alive tomorrow at noon at the embassy’s back entrance to begin your shift. Now, if you excuse me I have to go welcome to incoming squad and Captain Price.”

You sighed at his name, your John was here. You began to breath unevenly, emotion taking over you, but you were too tired to cry. “Sir, if I could just-“

“No Lieutenant. You will not speak any longer. You are to remain silent when I am in your presence. I do not want anymore inexcusable behavior from you and if there is, I will be forced to punish you accordingly.” He was stern as he threw his cap on and exited the tent.

You felt helpless as the nurse shushed you and began to administer more fluids into your IV and tried to give you some food.

A couple of hours later, you were up and walking. You were hardly doing it, but the nurse needed the bed for a soldier who had gotten a stomach parasite while in the desert. You were on your way back to your tent when you saw Captain Snyder.

His cocky smirk made your stomach sink. “Lieutenant! I see your back to your normal self!” He landed a hard pat to your shoulder, making you nearly topple over.

“Sir, please, I really need a couple of days to recover, I’m not well.” You looked up at him with your droopy, sunken in eyes.

He laughed. “You think I’m going to allow you that? I am your superior and you are going to listen to me. You answer to me and take orders from me. If I tell you you’re fine and to fulfill your 24 hour tomorrow, that’s what you do. Clear?”

“Captain, sir, please-“

“I said clear?!” His voice echoed as he shouted in your face, his grip tight on your upper arm.

“Sir-“

“I’m sorry.” You heard a cocky voice fill your ears. “What did you just say?” It was a voice that began to fill your soul with life.

“Captain Price.” Snyder kept his grip on you as he turned. “I was just telling my Lieutenant here-“

“Your Lieutenant?” John chuckled lowly as he slowly stepped closer, foot by foot.

“I am her Captain now, she takes her orders from me.” His grip tightened on you as he straightened himself to stand taller. You whimpered at the brusing grip of his fingers digging into your skin.

John’s laugh brought your eyes up to him. Your knees about gave out at the sight of him. He was in full uniform, his guns hanging from his hip, his boonie cap hanging low on his forehead. “Last time I checked Captain,” He spat the man’s title. “Her vest says 141, so does her file. That makes her my Lieutenant.” John cocked his head to the side as he crossed his arms over his chest.

“You are not apart of this mission Price.” Snyder kept his arm on you, almost like his bruises in your arm would claim you as his property.

“Get your hands off my officer before I lay mine on you.” John’s voice was a growl as he threatened Snyder. “Now.”

You felt the fingers dug into your arm slowly release as you wobbled, now standing on your own. You fully faced John, seeing him fully. His gaze softened at your state. “She will only ever take orders from me, her Captain. She will not take anything from your mouth. She is my Lieutenant, and will report to me and only me.” He gently grabbed you as he escorted you to your tent, leaving Captain Snyder speechless.

“Oh Y/N, my dear.” He set you on your cot, coming to sit with you, letting you lean against him. “What is happening here?”

You sniffled as you took in that homey scent of him. The sweet cologne mixed with cigar smoke. He was here, your John was here. “How’re the boys, I miss them.”

“Oh your voice-“ He began to draw circles into your back as he ran his hand through your hair, shushing you. “Don’t talk, save your energy to rest, love. I’m so sorry this is happening.”

You look up at him, staring into his eyes. “Kiss me.”

He doesn’t hesitate to follow your instructions. His lips meet yours briefly, yet the kiss was so full of love and care. “Darling…”

“John?” You said.

“Yes dear?”

“What was that out there?”

“What was what?” He cocked his head, raising his eyebrows as he stared down at you.

“Your Lieutenant?” You smirked, kissing him again.

“You are mine. That man has no right to talk to you that way. Only I can boss you around, only I can order you around. You’re mine.” His eyes darkened as he spoke, his voice a low growl.

“John?” You cooed.

“Yes Y/N?” His eyes were hooded as he looked at you.

“Make me yours.” John flinched forward to kiss you but quickly stopped. “John?”

“I don’t wanna break you. You’re so pretty and you don’t feel well.” His hand caressed your cheek.

“I don’t care, wreck me.”

John’s whole demeanor changed as he roughly captured your lips with his, his hands groping around your body, holding on tightly.

“Look at ya, all needy for me.” John’s voice ran shivers up your spine as his breath tickled against your neck.

His lips left marks all over your neck as he began to rid you of your shirt. “Lemme see ya-“

“John-“ His eyes met yours as you began to breath quicker in anticipation. He looked at you as you nodded and he quickly left you without a shirt or bra.

His hands massaged your breasts as his mouth took home on one of your nipples, sucking and playing with it. His gums of satisfaction caused sparks through your nerves. You let out a few quiet moans, and at that he made it his job to bring more out of you.

He loved that sound and wanted to drink it in, hearing it over and over. You put your hand in his hair as he continue to give your breasts attention, but you needed him elsewhere. You took his wrist in your other hand as you let it to your center. “John, please.” You begged.

His eyes were blown out as he looked up at you, practically ripping your pants off as he took his stance between your legs, his face inches from you. “You’re soaked baby.” Two of his fingers dragged through your folds. “All ready for me aren’t you?”

Those two fingers pressed inside of you, moving around, feeling the way you felt. John let out a moan at the feeling, beginning to scissor his fingers to stretch you out. “Gotta make you comfortable baby.” His fingers then pumped in and out of you slowly as his mouth latched into your clit.

You let out an unholy moan at the pressure. “John!” His name kept leaving your lips along with strings of curses.

“You gonna cum for me doll?” His voice had a hint of teasing to it, having you coming undone so quickly. “Do it, cum around my fingers, all over my mouth.”

And you did. His beard was coated with a glaze as he sat up and began to undo his belt. “Come here sweet thing.”

His thumb guided your chin as you sat up, mouth open and ready for him. “Mmm, that’s a sight.”

“I love you John.” You said with doe eyes, staring up at him from the edge of your cot.

“You’re gonna really love me in a minute baby.” He pulled his boxers down and freed his hard cock, it springing free in front of your eyes.

You stared as he pulled his pants all the way down and discarded his shirt. His cock was large, but it was beautiful. It had a vein running up the bottom of it, curving up slightly and his pink tip was shiny with precum. You licked your lips as your left hand rested on his thigh, your right wrapping around his base.

You heard his breath hitch at the contact and you looked up at him as you took him in your mouth, then locking a stripe up the bottom of his cock. “Fuck baby, yes.”

His hand came to dig into your hair to guide you along him, you sucking and pumping him to absolute ecstasy.

His groans were music to your ears. You continued to keep eye contact as he began to take control little by little. You felt his hand gently push against the back of your head as you took him deeper and deeper into your throat.

You could tell he wanted to fuck your mouth. You pulled off of him with a pop and brought his face close to yours. “John honey?”

“Yes?”

“Do it.” John let out the most gorgeous moan at your words as he stood back to his full height and tightly held your hair. He shoved his dick all the way to the back of your throat, causing a small gag to come out of you.

He was singing your praises as he stayed there. “That’s it baby, relax for me.” He spoke slowly, calmly.

Continuing to take deep breaths, your nose was buried in his hips until he moved, and he moved quickly. His pace was reckless and you could feel a bruise forming at the back of your mouth from his tip abusing it. The sounds and grunts coming out of him were dirty and it made you wet thinking about how his cock would feel inside of you.

Your hands squeezed his thighs as you felt him begin to stutter. “Fuck.”

He grabbed your shoulders as he lifted you up and bent you over the small desk in your tent, quickly shoving himself deep in your pussy. “So fucking tight, mm.”

He paused for a second, breathing through teeth. “Fuck baby, relax a little.”

His thumb rubbed your lower back as he felt you become more comfortable with his size. He bummed as he began to move, slow at first.

He grunted as his arms crossed, hands grabbing your hips to reinforce himself as his hips began to quickly snap against your ass. You were a moaning mess as his balls stimulated your clit. “Fuck! Yes!”

“Who do you belong to?” He said it between grunts and the question caused you to moan in response. “Who’s. Are. You.”

“Yours! I’m all yours John!!” You we’re shouting, the pleasure he was giving you was out of this world.

You felt the coil in your stomach tightening as he continued to plow into you. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum.” You said, your legs beginning to shake.

“Cum for me darling.” A couple more thrusts and you were a mess under him, your hips were beginning to ache and your legs were jelly.

“I’m close.” He growled lowly, grunts pouring from his mouth as his hips moved sloppily. “In or out?”

You couldn’t even respond as he continued to wreck your insides. “Baby, I need to know.”

“In.”

John released as soon as the word left your mouth, filling you up. His pulled his cock out and quickly shoved two fingers in you, keeping his cum from leaking out. “Look at how pretty you look all fucked out.”

“John…” Your voice made him switch immediately, removing his fingers and swooping you up in his arms as he put you on your cot.

“I’ll be right back, I promise.” John kissed your forehead, leaving the tent.

You laid in the afterglow waiting for him to return, and when he did you began to tear up. He walked in with your favorite pajama pants and one of his hoodies and a towel.

He was dressed in his pajamas as well. He cleaned you up, helping you into the clothes he brought you. “I couldn’t come see my girl and not bring her something from home when I leave.”

He laid down behind you, your back against his chest as he pulled your hair into two braids, out of your face. “I really do love you John.”

“I love you too, and don’t let Snyder get to you. I will take care of it okay? You will be here resting as long as you need before you’re healthy again. I won’t let him mistreat you anymore. You’re my girl.”

You turned to look up at him as he planted a long kiss on your lips. “I won’t let anyone hurt you ever again.”

You kissed him again before settling in against his chest. “Thank you…”

“Always my love.”

#captain price x reader #modern warefare 2 x reader #soap mactavish smut #soap mactavish x reader #tf141 x reader #cod mw2 #simon ghost riley #johnny mactavish #john price #kyle gaz garrick

165 notes · View notes

xoxo-greed · 7 months

Note

Ayo your stuff are so good, they give me more delulu but I can't complain 😩 honestly, I've been thinking for a long time about Floyd Leech himself just fucking reader on one of mostro lounges couches when no one is around, since it gives him the kick. This bastard is probably often horny change my mind.

Sorry Azul, I don't feel ashamed for doing it on YOUR couch of YOUR workplace while YOUR probably in the next room while YOUR friend and coworker gives me the time of my life💅

AN: teehee pookie bear yk yall always give me the freaky ones but this one is just perfect 🤭 and Azul’s pretty and all, but Floyd is just mm mmm MMM 😼 enjoy !!!! this is a f!reader fyi, if u want male, tell me!

you sit on one of the mostró lounge’s couches with a sigh, you agreed to help the Leech brothers with the cafe, but the moment Azul pulled out a paper for you to sign, you knew it was a bad idea. Of course, in all your ego, you decided against the little voice in your head that you’d help them, and holy shit was is tiring. You turn over to your side, seeing as Floyd approaches you. “Hey little shrimpy,” He says in a passive voice, he seems to he over worked as well. “How ya holding up?” He asks, sitting beside you. “I’m okay, thanks for asking, but I can’t seem to fall asleep or anything, I gotta lose some more energy.” You tell him, you have to lose the remaining bolts of energy coursing through your body.

He’s on top of you now.

“I have a solution for that.”

———————————————————————

“faster..” you tell him, you feel it deep in your stomach, the urge for the tip of his cock to touch your cervix. “deeper!” you whine out, your mind in-between your thighs and hole, surrounded by heat and lust. “Give it time little shrimpy, this little hole is a bit too tight today..” he lets out a giggle, this maniac.. this.. pleasure causing maniac who’s ramming his hips into yours, oh so good is all that fills your mind. Juices covering your cunt and his member in a surprising amount, so good, so deep, and he groans gutturally with the way your warm and sticky walls press onto him.

“Hitting my limit.. hitting.. my limit..” he whispers out through gritted teeth, your moans and whines for him to go faster is music to his ears, hitting the finish mark with a final thrust as your walls go from pink to white from his cum.

“Azul’s gonna get on our ass if we don’t clean the couch.” He laughs.

a/n: hey guys, sorry for leaving for like 3 months i was lazy to write things 🔥 anyways im BACK and i got horny (and my bf cant always text me so like) i got one question chat id this w or L rizz chat 😼

#W rizz tbh #Floyd Leech smut #twst smut #floyd leech x reader #floyd x reader #fuck the tags 🧍

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weixuldo · 4 months

Text

Enigma// ch 28

anakin x reader

A/N: Hiii- just so u know this chapter is pretttty long and very plot heavy- just wanna remind yall im not a medical professional lol so sorry any misconstruing of info (i tried my best)!! i hope u all enjoy! i’ll explain more abt the chapter in the notes at the end :)

it’s a month before the baby is due and Anakin gets some news that may alter your future

warnings: cursing, pregnancy, liver failure, hospitals, whump, medical procedures, birth

____________________________

September 26th

It had only been a few weeks since you and Anakin were wed and his health had already deteriorated significantly.

He was now at the point where he was only able to leave the house to go to his weekly check-ups at the hospital.

When he was at home, he tried to be more active and help you out, but you insisted that he take it easy… you wanted him to meet the baby and it seemed that he didn’t have much longer so you didn’t want him to rush the process.

His pain levels changed with every hour, though some days were worse than others. After his episode on your wedding night he had to start setting alarms to remind him to take his pills so that the medicine would be working at the optimal rate it could.

He headed your requests for him to “take it easy” but he still did so much for you (much to your chagrin).

At dinner he would get up from his chair to help you ease into yours, he would run bath’s for you and sneakily clean up the kitchen while you bathed, and he would stay up with you when you couldn’t rest.

You really couldn’t ask for a better husband.

As for you, the baby was really taking a toll on your tired body- Taking care of yourself, your baby, and your husband was a difficult feat.

Somedays you wanted nothing more than to roll over and not wake up, but you were never in those moods for long.

Today was no different- You woke up with sharp pains in your lower back but brushed them off, you had been having them all week. Rolling your eyes, you got out of bed.

Anakin was sitting stiffly on the sofa with one of his mechanical arms wrapped around his side. He was in pain.

“Ani?” you said, barely above a whisper.

He turned his focused gaze towards you and his furrowed brows softened, “Hey Angel- how’d you sleep?” he asked in a strained voice.

You didn’t miss the way his jaw clenched when he tried to shift into a better position.

“Not too well, but I’ll be ok. How about you? Are you alright?” you asked, walking towards him.

He quickly nodded before you came closer, “Yea-’m ok, I just need to take my pills- I’ll get them in a minute” he said through gritted teeth.

“I’ll go get them for you, Ani,” you said, turning towards the kitchen.

Before you knew it, his cool metallic grasp held your arm and made you shiver.

“No!” he exclaimed before clenching his eyes shut and sucking in a sharp breath.

“No, I’m ok- you need to rest baby” he said, attempting to guide you to the couch as he hoisted himself up.

You were about to protest when you felt an uncomfortable sensation in your lower abdomen,

“Shit!” you exclaimed, gripping the armrest on the couch.

“What is it? What’s wrong?” he asked, rushing from the kitchen, pills still in his clenched hand.

“Nothing- just a harsh kick” you said, attempting to suppress your grimace.

Anakin didn’t leave.

“I’m ok Ani, really” you said before he nodded and went back to finish taking his meds.

The baby had been moving a lot lately, but your doctor said it was normal for babies to be more active if the mother was under stress (which you definitely were).

____________________________

“I’ll see you in a few” Anakin waved as he headed out the door with his jacket to meet Ben at his car.

Ben and Ahsoka had been taking turns driving Anakin to his weekly appointments since he couldn’t drive himself and it wasn’t safe for you to drive either. They had been a huge help and you would never stop thanking them.

“Bye Ani” you said before kissing him one last time.

The ride to the hospital was mostly silent between Ben and Anakin, save for the radio that played classic 2000’s hits.

“How have you been feeling?” Ben asked as he pulled into the hospital’s parking lot.

“Peachy…” Anakin lamented blankly.

“I’m being serious Anakin,” Ben sighed.

Anakin took a deep breath, “honestly I feel worse by the day but I don’t want to tell her- she already has enough on her plate…”

Ben’s brows furrowed and he stroked his beard.

“Ben, I don’t know if i’m gonna make it to the birth-”

“Don’t think like that Anakin” Ben cut into his friend’s thoughts abruptly.

“You’ve got to have hope”.

Anakin nodded silently before allowing his friend to help him out of the car and into his wheelchair.

Anakin could still walk, but it was better for him to conserve the little energy he had.

Of course, he absolutely hated using his chair- but it was the best option.

The clinic was abnormally warm today and Anakin was getting uncomfortable in his sweatshirt. Ben sat in the chair next to the exam table Anakin was laid up on; head rested against the wall and arms crossed.

“You didn’t have to stay Ben, I’m sure the news is going to be the same as always” Anakin sighed, staring at the ceiling.

Anakin’s usual doctor had just taken a few samples to run labs on; a routine procedure for him- all there was to do was wait around for the results.

“I didn’t want to just leave you in here, It’s perfectly fine Anakin” Ben smiled.

Before Anakin could answer the doctor knocked on the door once more; in his hand a thick pamphlet along with his usual clipboard.

“Mr. Skywalker…We have some unfortunate news…”

Anakin felt his stomach drop- he didn’t expect there to be good news, but he didn’t expect anything other than the ordinary either.

“Yes?” he asked with a waiver in his voice.

“I’m afraid you have developed acute liver failure… This is when a patient develops sudden and severe liver failure without a history of long-term liver disease. In these cases, an urgent liver transplant may be their only life-saving treatment. And from what your labs are showing- a transplant may be your only saving grace, sir”.

Anakin’s eyes closed, he needed a moment to process this.

“Alright, how long do I have?”

The doctor sighed, “There really is no telling sir- but not long…not long at all. Most likely in the next two weeks”.

Ben sat up in his chair, “So what are we going to do for him? There are at least seventy slots before him on the donor list!”

The doctor turned his attention to the bearded man; “We are admitting him to our hepatology and gastrology ward to monitor his condition- we will keep him here as long as we can and try to find a donor that matches his needs.”

“So what I'm hearing is you’re going to stick him in a room and hope he doesn’t die before you can find a plausible liver?” Ben argued but Anakin stopped him.

“It’s fine, Ben,” he said before directing his attention to the doctor, “I don’t care if I’m miserable, please just try to keep me alive long enough to see my wife deliver our baby.”

“Of course”.

______________________

You were lying on the couch scrolling mindlessly through your phone when Ben’s number flashed across your screen.

Odd, he usually wasn’t the one to call.

“Hello?”

Hey- umm, we have some bad news.

“Oh…Oh God-” you sat up immediately.

Anakin’s condition has turned into acute liver failure and he is in the final stages… He was admitted this afternoon and probably won't-

You heard Ben sniffle on the other line as your own tears dared to fall.

-won’t be going home again

You felt your world spinning and you had to brace yourself on the couch arm, “Can I see him?- I want to see him,” you said firmly, rising to your feet.

“No, Visiting hours are over for the day” you could hear the frown in Ben’s voice.

They closed around the time he was finally admitted, so I didn’t even get to see him- but I have his stuff, want me to drop it off?

“U-umm does he need it?” you asked, hoping to delay the blow of reality.

“C-could you just hold onto it for now?”

Of course

“Thank you” you said before hanging up quickly.

You tossed your phone on the other side of the couch and covered your mouth with your hands. This was real- not just hypothetical dates and times… He was really at the end.

As much as you didn’t want to, you just couldn’t hold back your agonizing cries.

Anakin would really be gone soon.

____________

You had a terrible night sleep and felt like absolute shit- not only were you worried about Anakin, you couldn’t get a grasp on the pain you began to feel through your body.

Thankfully Ahsoka was supposed to come over in a while for lunch and to take you to see Anakin at the hospital.

About an hour after you had gotten yourself together for the day, you heard a knock on the door and Ahsoka came in with two to-go boxes.

“Hello!” she said in a sing-songy voice, “How are my two favorite people doing?”.

You weakly laughed, “not two just yet! But it sure does feel like it's gonna be soon” you exhaled as you rose to your feet. Ahsoka always knew how to lighten a mood.

“Are you feeling alright?” she asked, putting the food on the counter.

“I’m not sure, I’ve been feeling off this week- It’s probably just normal pains though” you said, joining her at the table.

“How are you feeling about…” she began.

You bit your lip and attempted to keep your smile.

“I’m… not great, but I’m just hoping for a miracle. I-I just need Anakin to be ok”

Ahsoka nodded and rubbed your upper arms.

“I understand- I.. Just know that if you need anything or help when the baby comes- please never hesitate to ask”.

You hated that she spoke as if his fate were already sealed, but it mostly was. He had been living with a failing liver longer than he would have admitted to (especially evident in the fact that he never asked for the extra labs on his liver because of his past of alcohol abuse) since he just was trying to ignore the facts until they just went away (they never did).

“Thank you Ahsoka, It really means a lot” you said, before you felt another sharp pain in your lower back.

“Woah, are you sure you’re alright?”

You nodded with gritted teeth, “Yea, It’s fine- Probably just slept wrong”

“You sure? I can take you to the clinic if you’re worried” she offered.

“No no, I think I’m fine- let's eat!”

The boxes had just been opened when you felt another jolt of pain shoot up your spine. You shut your eyes and clenched your jaw.

Ahsoka sprung to your side and placed a gentle hand on your back, “Hey! Are you sure your-”

She was cut off by your labored breathing; your chest heaved as you slid your chair back.

“I-I think I just need some… fresh.. A-air” you said, getting to your feet.

She shook her head, “I think you should stay seated” she coached.

Your world was spinning as pains washed over your body; you focused on your breathing and eventually got yourself to a decently normal cadence.

You got up to head to the bathroom to splash some cool water on your face when you had to grip onto the sofa for support. You let out a painful cry and your eyes widened when you felt something wet running down your leg.

Your water broke.

“A-Ahsok-” you stuttered; you had barely processed what just happened when she was already by your side.

“Ok- Ok, umm- Just breathe- I’m gonna get you to the hospital! It’s gonna be ok” she said, trying her best to stay calm.

You nodded and closed your eyes to focus on controlling your breathing- This was really happening.

__________________

Ben sat in the big blue hospital-grade chair beside the exam table; he was reading a history book Satine had gotten for him on wars of the past.

Anakin was lying wide awake on the uncomfortable exam table; currently he was occupied with the small cracks in the ceiling- at least he was keeping his mind busy.

Soon enough another physician came in to observe him; Anakin was just about over random people coming in and out of his room like a revolving fucking door! Why did so many doctors need to come in to tell him the same verdict? Wasn’t hearing that he was “gonna to die soon” once enough?!

They began talking him through what the last few days may look like and if Anakin needed someone to talk through his emotions with (He thought that was stupid- why have someone else tell him how to read his own fucking emotions?) .

The doctor left to grab something (again) and Anakin turned to Ben.

“Do you think Snipps is bringing y/n over soon?” he asked tiredly.

Ben looked up and shrugged, “I assume so, they probably just got a late start”.

The doctor came back in and began to drone on about some other “experimental treatments” when Ben’s phone started to ring. He excused himself and went into the hallway- it was Ahsoka.

“Hello?”

Hey Ben! So um… we’re not gonna make it to visit Anakin today- y/n’s water just broke and we’re on the way to the hospital now.

“Maker! She isn’t due for another four weeks!” Ben exclaimed.

I know- Skyguy wasn’t picking up. Just let him know what's going on. I’m pretty sure she wont be up there to see him anytime soon though.

“Alright, I’ll let him know, be safe- And good luck y/n” Ben said before hanging up and swiftly making his way back to Anakin’s room.

Ben quietly knocked but urgently entered the room; the doctor and Anakin’s focus both shifted to him.

“Ben, You alright?” Anakin asked- he could read the worry all over his friend’s face.

“Anakin… y/n has just gone into labor”

Anakin’s eyes widened and he sat up abruptly before grabbing his side in pain.

“Woah, take it easy Mr. Skywalker” the doctor informed, placing his steady hands on his patient’s shoulders.

“I need to see her!” Anakin exclaimed, trying to push himself up.

“No, you don’t need to overexert yourself, you’ll just worsen your condition”

“Doc, she’s a month early- I need to be there for my wife” Anakin protested, pushing himself off of the examination table.

Thankfully he was already wearing his prosthetics today; even though it wasn’t recommended he was allowed to wear them some days (much to his physician’s displeasure).

The doctor ignored his protests and kept him sat.

“Sir I cannot let you leave, you are my patient and I need to look after your wellbeing and exhausting yourself by going all the way to the maternity ward is not in the interest of your physical wellbeing!”

Anakin’s gaze hardened and he looked over the physician’s shoulder to Ben, “Is she alright Ben? Maker-Please tell me she’s alright” he begged.

Ben gave a sympathetic look before sighing, “I’m not sure, Ahsoka didn’t give many details”.

Anakin threw his head back onto the plush table and let out a defeated sigh.

“I am very sorry Mr. Skywalker, but I need to continue your exami-”

Anakin shot up again, this time with all of his strength. His eyes conveyed desperation, sadness, anger, and worry as he wrapped a mechanical hand around the doctor’s wrist.

“We both know my condition is a death sentence- unless I miraculously get a donor in the next week, I’m not gonna see the end of the month. So hear me when I tell you I will not sit idly by when my wife is scared and alone giving birth for the first time. I will not leave her feeling like i didn’t care” Anakin physically shook with emotion.

Ben came to his side and tried to talk him down; even if he disagreed with the doctor’s order, he was the more level headed between himself and his friend.

“She is my wife and I will be by her side to see our baby born- even if it’s the last thing I do, at least I was there with her and left her knowing I'd come when she needed me.”

The doctor’s own eyes began to water once he was released from Anakin’s hold, but even so he shook his head, “I-i’m truly sorry sir, B-but I do not-”

“I could drop dead any fucking day! Can you not just let a dying man be there for his wife?! For Goddsake, my wife is delivering four weeks early?! She’s probably terrified down there!” he practically screamed.

The doctor looked to Ben for guidance but only found the bearded man casting a disapproving gaze his way.

“He will find a way to leave regardless of what you prescribe” Ben warned.

Finally, after a moment of contemplation, the doctor nodded and shortly left the room, “I hope you realize, this is not a wise decision- I will have to refer you to a different physician”.

Anakin’s eye twitched at the man’s words, it was basically a “fuck you” to him. But he didn’t care, what he cared about was getting to you.

____________________________

Ahsoka drove like a madwoman to get you here quickly; once you arrived you were taken from the emergency room to the maternity ward. Ahsoka wasn’t allowed to come into the room with you, so she was left pacing the waiting room nervously.

Another wave of searing pain washed through your body as you clenched your eyes shut. You bit back a scream and clawed at the hospital grade mattress beneath you.

Maker, you were never doing this shit again.

Your whole body trembled as you let out a strained cry. You weren’t due for another month- why was this happening now? Was the baby going to be alright?

After another cry you managed to get one of your many questions out.

“W-Where’s Ana-anakin?” you huffed out to a nurse (who definitely had no idea who you were talking about).

“What’s that darling?” she asked, trying to be as comforting as she could.

“My h-husband, Wh-where is he” you asked desperately- your mind was in a whirr and you were not thinking straight.

“Does he h-have his legs on? Or d-does he need my help-”

“I’m sorry mam, I don't understand?” she offered.

You were about to speak again when another sharp pain nipped at your lower back; you groaned and pushed your head back into the pillows behind you.

What if Anakin wasn't coming, what if something happened?

You trembled in pain and fear- this was all new to you and you were alone…

After what felt like ages another midwife came in to assist- she seemed more experienced than the first one; once she saw your scared state she immediately went to comfort you.

“ts all gonna be alright, Hon. We’re gonna fix you up with some pain meds and make you as comfortable as we can- The baby ‘s gonna be alright ‘n your husband’s comin’ soon- just try to breathe'' she spoke with a warm southern accent that almost made it seem like what she was saying was true.

You nodded and took one of the ice chips she offered you. The cold chip felt nice as it melted in your mouth; they provided some much needed cooling from your uncomfortably warm body.

Your eyes were soon shut tightly from pain, “I-I don’t th-think I can do t-this” you cried as you braced for another rush of pain.

In the moment the sensation reached its peak, the door burst open making you gasp; you couldn’t help the overwhelming sobs once you realized who it was.

Anakin- he was standing tall and covered in the required scrubs; they fit him terribly and one of the other midwives had to hold them up as he stumbled towards you.

“Angel!” he called once he was by your side.

“Ani! You came?!” you exclaimed, desperately reaching for him.

“Of course I came, Sweetheart, I wouldn’t miss it for the world” (and that was really true).

“A-are you going t-to be ok? What about your l-liver?” you fretted over your husband’s condition.

“I’ve got it taken care of, just focus on breathing for me, ok?” The calmness of his voice helped your worries subside.

Your eyes opened just enough to look over his worried features before you screwed them shut once more. You pushed your head into the pillow as your back arched in pain.

“A-Ani” you cried as you grabbed onto one of his mechanical hands; good thing he couldn’t actually feel your grip because it definitely would have pained him.

“Shhh- it's all going to be ok princess. you’ve got it” he said sweetly as he ran his other hand over your hair.

“I-I’m sorry Ani” you sobbed.

“No, no! What do you have to apologize for? Nothing baby- nothing” he said, pressing kisses to your temple.

“The baby wasn’t due for f-four more weeks- I put them in d-danger”.

“What? No, they just wanted to come see us early- that's all. You’ve done nothing wrong” he tried to smile.

He was a good actor, but you knew he was hurting just as much as you were.

With what little strength you had left, you pulled him closer; “I-I’m scared…What if the baby doesn't make it Ani?”.

His brows upturned sadly, “Oh no, baby- don’t think about that now, you’re doing great and so is the baby”.

Somehow his words calmed you (even though he wasn’t the least bit certified to be telling you these things).

You nodded and asked him to hold you closer and he did the best he could.

You fell in and out of consciousness but were still able to follow the midwife's instructions. The whole time Anakin stayed by your side comforting you (and hiding his own pain from you).

“She's losing a lot of blood” a midwife relayed to the doctor, who then barked some orders to another nurse.

“Did you hook her up to the IV?” one of them asked.

“What?! What’s happening?” Anakin demanded, walking closer to the nurse at your feet.

“We’ll have to do an emergency C-section” the midwife said to the doctor, ignoring Anakin’s worried questions.

“Is she going to be alrig-” Anakin started.

“Sir, Please back away- we’re handling it.”

He was about to respond when you tugged weakly on his arm begging for him to come back. He bit his lower lip and quickly made his way back to you. Your eyes were unfocused and glassy.

“A-ani, I can’t- I c-can't-” you croaked out as your body began to wear down.

“It’s going to be ok Angel. It’s going to be alright, just stay awake for me” he repeated as he brushed the loose strands of hair out of your face.

After a particularly painful contraction you fell limp and Anakin’s heart skipped a beat.

“Y/n!? Baby, please wake up for me- please” he begged as he caressed your flushed face.

He felt his tears falling- he never thought he would be the one to lose you.

After a moment your eyes hazily opened and closed; Anakin’s pulse was racing as he attempted to gain your attention.

“That’s it Sweetheart! Just try to stay awake for me please” he cried as your eyes finally landed on him (thought they were still unfocused).

“A-Ani-”

A midwife began to unlock the wheels of the hospital bed; an odd feeling washed over Anakin and he stood still for a moment gripping onto the bed rail for support.

“Sir, Please move your hand off of the bed” the nurse sternly asked.

No response.

“We need to take her into surgery right now. Sir, I’m going to have to ask you to-”

Anakin collapsed onto the floor with a thud- the nurses initially figured he passed out from the stress of watching his wife give birth, but once he started clawing at his side in agony they realized it was something else.

You heard his painful howls and snapped back into reality (just for a moment).

“Anakin!” you exclaimed as you watched him struggle on the floor beside you.

“Sir- Sir what’s wrong?” one attempted to ask.

“He’s in the last stages of liver failure- He needs a doctor!” you cried.

All you wanted was to go to him, but your own pain was immobilizing. The next moments were a blur; first they wheeled you down to the operation room- you cried on the way, begging for them to let you stay with Anakin (you were not in the right head space to be making any decisions).

Anakin was left on the floor as they took you out of the room- was he ever going to see you again? He felt himself slipping away…

He felt the darkness clouding his vision.

He felt…

***

a/n: it’s getting hella juicy… i hope this chapter wasn’t too everywhere haha… i’m not gonna lie idk that much abt liver failure but i do know abt acute liver failure. the next chapter is gonna have some medical stuff too and some of it is pretty rare, ngl (mostly pertaining to the birth) just cause im a sucker for drama- so sorry if it’s not the most realistic (everything i’ll write in the next chapter is possible tho/ just in very specific circumstances hahah)

Also i’m not the best with timelines and not entirely sure how long some of these medical things last… oops- that all being said!!! thank you all for the support and interest in my story :)

taglist : @dnamht @sxoulohvn @angeelcoree @wtf-andys @httpeachesblog @katsukiswrld @jetiikote @poisonedsultana @imarimone12 @fallinlovewithevil @sythe-skywalker

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