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anhed-nia · 4 years

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BLOGTOBER 10/17/2020: SPOOKIES

What do we watch, when we watch movies? This question was sparked by my SOV experience with the very different, and differently interesting BLOODY MUSCLE BODYBUILDER FROM HELL and HORROR HOUSE ON HIGHWAY 5. Within the Shot On Video category, one can find inventive homemade features that are driven entirely by blood, sweat, and the creators' feeling of personal satisfaction. The results are sometimes fascinating, in their total alienation from the conventions and techniques of mainstream filmmaking, and after all, one rarely sees anything whose primary motivation is passion, here in the late stages of capitalism. But, all this talk about what goes on behind the camera points to a discrepancy in how we consume different kinds of production. The typical mode of consumption is internal to the movie: What happens in it? Do you relate to the characters? Are you able to suspend your disbelief, to experience the story on a vicarious level? One hardly needs to come up with examples of films that invite this style of viewing. Alternatively, we can experience the movie as a record of a time and place in which real people defied conventions and sometimes broke laws in order to produce a work of art. SOV production is usually viewed through this lens, where the primary interest is not the illusory content, but the filmmakers' sheer determination to create. We find some overlap in movies like EVIL DEAD, which simultaneously presents a terrifying narrative, and evidence of what a truly driven team can create without the aid of a studio, or any real money to speak of. See also, Larry Cohen's New York City-based horror films, in which a compelling drama with great acting can exist side by side with phony but beautiful effects, and exciting stories of stolen footage that would be dangerous or impossible to attempt today. I'm thinking about these different modes of consumption now because I just watched SPOOKIES, a legitimately cursed-seeming film whose harrowing production history has superseded whatever people think about what it shows on the screen. The lovingly composed blu-ray from Vinegar Syndrome includes a feature-length documentary that attempts to explain the making of the film--which is accompanied by its own feature length commentary track by documentarists Michael Gingold and Glen Baisley. The very existence of this artifact suggests a lot about the nature of this movie, in and of itself. The truth behind its existence is as funny as it is tragic.

I'm not going to do a whole breakdown of the tortured origins of SPOOKIES, which is much better told by the aforementioned documentary. To summarize: Once upon a time in the mid 1980s, filmmakers Brendan Faulkner, Thomas Doran and Frank Farel conspired to make a fun, flamboyant rubber monsterpiece called TWISTED SOULS. It was wild, ridiculous, and transparently fake-looking, but it was loved by its hard-working creators; as a viewer, that soulful sense of joy can rescue many a "bad" movie from its various foibles. Then, inevitably, sleazoid producer Michael Lee stepped in--a man who thought you could cut random frames out of the middle of scenes to improve a movie's pace--and ruined it with extreme prejudice. Carefully crafted special effects sequences were cut, relatively functional scenes were re-edited into oblivion, and the seeds of hatred were sown between the filmmakers and the producer. Ultimately, everyone who once cared for TWISTED SOULS was forced to abandon ship, and first time director Eugenie Joseph stepped in to help mutilate the picture beyond all recognition. Thus SPOOKIES was born, a mangled, unloved mutation that would curse many of its original parents to unemployability. For the audience, it is intriguingly insane, often insulting, and hard to tear your eyes off of--but in spite of whatever actually wound up on the screen, it's impossible to forget its horrifying origin story as it unspools.

As far as what's on the screen goes: A group of "friends", including a middle-aged businessman and his wife, a vinyl-clad punk rock bully and his moll, two new wave-y in-betweeners, and...a guy with a hand puppet are somehow all leaving the same party, and all ready to break into a vacant funeral home for their afterparty. Well, this happens after a 13 year old runaway inexplicably wanders in to a "birthday party" in there, that looks like it was thrown for him by Pennywise, and he has the nerve to act surprised when he is attacked by a severed head and a piratey-looking cat-man who straight up purrs and meows throughout the picture. Anyway, separately of that, which is unrelated to anything, the island of misfit friends finds a nearly unrecognizable "ouija board" in the old dark house. Actually this thing is kind of fun-looking, having been made by one of the fun-havers on the production before the day that fun died, and I wonder if anyone has considered trying to make a real board game out of it...but I digress. Naturally, the board unleashes evil forces, including a zombie uprising in the cemetery outside, a plague of Ghoulie-like ankle-biters, an evil asian spider-lady (accompanied by kyoto flutes), muck-men that fart prodigiously until they melt in a puddle of wine (?), and uh...I know I'm forgetting stuff. One of the reasons I'm forgetting is because of this whole side story about a tuxedo-wearing vampire in the basement (or somewhere?) who has entrapped a beautiful young bride by cursing her with immortality. That part is a little confusing, not only because it doesn't intersect with the rest of the movie, but because sometimes it seems contemporary--as the bride struggles to survive the zombie plague--and sometimes it seems like a flashback, as our heroes find what looks like the mummified corpse of the dracula guy, complete with his signet ring. So, I don't know what to tell you really. Those are just some of the things that happen in the movie.

Some people like this a lot, and have supported its ascendance to cult status, which is a huge relief when you know what everyone went through to make this movie, only to have it ripped away from them and used against them. I found SPOOKIES a little hard to take, for all the reasons that the cast and crew express in the documentary. It holds a certain amount of visual fascination, whatever you think of it; something of its original creativity remains evident in the movie's colorful, exaggerated look, and its steady parade of unconvincing but inventive creature effects. But then, you have to deal with the farting muck-men. What was once a scene of terror starring REGULAR muck-men, that sounded incredibly laborious to pull off, became a scene of confusing "comedy" when producer Michael Lee insisted that the creatures be accompanied by a barrage of scatalogical noises. Apparently this was Lee's dream come true, as a guy who insisted everyone pull his finger all the time, and who once tried to call the movie "BOWEL ERUPTOR". But, of all the deformations SPOOKIES endured, the fart sounds dealt a mortal injury to the filmmakers' feelings, and even without knowing that, it's hard to enjoy yourself while that's happening.

Actually, all the farts forced me to ask myself: Is this...a comedy? Like for real, as its main thing? As the movie slogged on, I had to decide that it wasn't, but I was distracted by the notion for around 40 minutes. I was only released from this nagging suspicion when the bride makes her long marathon run through throngs of slavering zombies who swarm her, grope her, and tear off her clothes, before she narrowly escapes to an even worse fate. The lengthy scene is strangely gripping, and sleazy for a movie that sometimes feels like low rent children's entertainment. Part of the sequence’s success lies in its simplicity; it is unburdened by the convoluted complications of the rest of the movie, whose esoteric parts never fall together, so it seems to take on a sustained, intensifying focus. The action itself is unnerving, as the delicate and frankly gorgeous Maria Pechuka is molested and stripped nearly-bare by her undead bachelors, running from one drooling mob to another as the horde nearly engulfs her time and again. Actually, it feels a lot like a certain genre of SOV production in which, for the right price, any old creepy nerd can pay a small crew-for-hire to tape a version of his private fantasy, whether it's women being consumed by slime, or women being consumed by quicksand, or...generally, women being consumed by something. I wish I could describe this form of production in more specific or official terms, because I genuinely think it's wonderful that people do this. Anyway, Pechuka's interminable zombie run feels a little like that, and a little like a grim italian gutmuncher, and a little like an actual nightmare. Perhaps it only stands out against its dubious surroundings, but I kind of love it--and I'm happy to love it, because apparently the late Ms. Pechuka truly loved making SPOOKIES, and wanted other people to love it, too.

Which brings me to the uncomfortable place where I land with this movie. On the one hand...I think it's bad. It's so incoherent, and so insists on its impoverished form of comedy, that it's hard to be as charmed by it as I am by plenty of FX-heavy, no-budget oddities. Perhaps the lingering odor of misery drowns out the sweet joy that the crew once felt in the early days of creation--which is still evident, somehow, in its zany special effects, created by the likes of Gabe Bartalos and other folks whose work you definitely already know and love. But I feel ambivalent, about all of this. On the one hand, I can be a snob, and shit on people for failing to make a movie that meets conventional standards of success. On the other hand, I can be a DIFFERENT kind of snob--a more voyeuristic or even sadistic one--and celebrate the painful failures that produced a movie that is most interesting for its tormented history and its amusing ineptitude. I'm not really sure where I would prefer to settle with SPOOKIES, and movies like it. (As if anything is really "like" SPOOKIES) With all that said, I was left with one soothing thought by castmember Anthony Valbiro in the documentary. At some point, he tells us how ROSEMARY'S BABY is his personal cinematic comfort food; he can put it on at night, after an exhausting day, and drift to sleep, enveloped in its warm, glowing aura. He then says that he hopes there are people out there for whom his movie serves that same purpose, that some of us can have our "milk and cookies moment" with SPOOKIES. Honestly, I choke up just thinking about that.

#blogtober #2020 #spookies #horror #supernatural #vampire #zombie #creature feature #old dark house #cursed film #thomas doran #frank farel #eugenie joseph #michael lee #vipco #twisted souls #brendan faulkner #maria pechuka

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setaripendragon · 4 years

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Trapped in the Amber - 1x01

I promise I’m not dead! I know I haven’t been posting anything lately, but that’s because what I’ve been writing is mostly... well, this. The most ridiculously self-indulgent bullshit I’ve written in a long time, and it’s also the longest thing I’ve ever written, and it’s still not even half way done. I admit, I’m very self-conscious about this, because the nastier side of fandom has infected me with some bullshit prejudices that I haven’t completely managed to exorcise yet, but... I’m tired of being worried it’s not ‘good enough’, and maybe, if people do like it at all, it’ll motivate me to pick it back up. So, here I am, retelling Supernatural right from the start, with a next gen OC tagging along, fixing things here and there. (...Yeah, god, I know how that sounds...) It’s going to start out... sticking pretty close to the Supernatural script, although I tried to limit the amount of times I quoted the show verbatim, it still happens sometimes. The story will diverge from canon more and more as the little changes start piling up and having an effect, but... That’s a long way off, tbh. (For anyone who cares and doesn’t know me well enough to guess, the primary future!ships are Dean/Cas/Gabe and Sam/Mia, but apart from the main character being a Dean/Cas/Gabe baby who loves her parents, there really isn’t that much more focus on romance than there is in the show. For now.)

Blackwater Ridge, Lost Creek, Colorado – Friday 11th November 2005

Landing in the past feels like hitting the emergency stop on a bullet train, like she left her internal organs behind somewhere on the timeline. Meira knows it’s the past because the timeline had felt thick and gooey as she fell. Falling in the other direction would have felt worse, but that doesn’t mean she enjoyed the trip. Add that to the sensation of her grace suddenly retreating to coil up under her skin like a wounded animal, and she thinks it’s no surprise that the first thing she does once there’s solid ground beneath her feet is throw up.

“Oh, son of a bitch.” She groans once her stomach feels like it’s settled mostly back where it’s supposed to be. She braces her shoulder on a tree that’s conveniently nearby, and tries to get her bearings. She’s in a forest, she sees, as she looks around. There are a lot of forests on earth. There are forests elsewhere in the universe too, but she’s… pretty sure this is earth, anyway. And she’s somewhen in the past, although she can’t get any sense of where she actually is on the timeline, and when she tries to reach out with her grace to find out, a sharp, awful pain lances through her soul. She groans and staggers, leaning more of her weight against the tree and forcing her knees to keep her upright out of sheer force of will. She is not trying that again.

The thought that there might be something wrong with her grace is terrifying. She’s stranded, and she can’t get home. She thinks she might be able to manifest her wings, she can still feel them, after all, so they’re not gone, but she wouldn’t be able to fly on them. She can’t fly. She can’t fly.

The panic sits sharp and cloying in the back of her throat, and she swallows hard, as if that might get rid of it. It doesn’t. “Motherfucker.” She swears, and hates that it comes out more reedy than fierce. She has no idea how this happened, either, which doesn’t help. Well, she has some idea, because Heaven, Hell, and everyone in between has been trying to get rid of her for her entire life, and if whatever’s wrong with her grace is why she fell into the past, then she’d say someone finally succeeded. Dad’s going to go ballistic, she thinks, not sure if it makes her want to laugh, or cry.

“Hey, lady.” Someone barks, and Meira flinches so hard she nearly falls over. It’s only a decade of various combat training that saves her from ending up on her ass in the dirt. She has never in her life been unable to sense the people around her before. She’s always felt the shades and shapes of people’s souls. Until now, apparently, with her grace trapped under her skin and unable to reach out to feel the nuances of her environment.

The man standing a little ways off is fairly nondescript, with short-cropped light blonde hair and a touch of stubble, wearing what looked like wilderness gear. Meira has no idea what lies beneath his face, whether she can trust him or not and it makes her uneasy. “What’re you doing out here?” He demands.

“Getting lost?” Meira sasses, because nervousness has never helped shut her up.

And then, another man steps out of the underbrush, but this one, Meira recognises. It’s her dad. Even though he looks so baby-faced and young, she’d know him anywhere. The relief is like a physical blow and she sags against another tree. “And my name’s Meira.” She adds. “Not ‘lady’, thanks.”

Dad quirks a grin, enjoying her sass, and then says, with every ounce of cocky bravado she’s ever seen him use and then some; “Nice to meet you, Meira. I’m Dean.” He glances over at the other guy. “And this is… I’m sorry, what was your name again?” The question is so obviously insincere, and Meira chokes on an incredulous laugh, because she’s seen her dad playful before, even bordering on mean when he’s trying not to admit something’s wrong, but that was something else. It’s macho-posturing, she realises, with a mixture of hilarity and dread. He’s showing off, like a twat, for her.

Oh, god. She’s going to have to nip that right in the bud, or she’s going to throw up again.

“Roy. Roy Roberts.” The other guy replies through gritted teeth, glaring at Dad – at Dean, she’s going to have to get used to that, or she’s going to slip up, and things are going to get awkward real fast – with enough venom to bring down an elephant.

“Hey, mind if I tag along with you guys?” Meira asks, to diffuse some of the angry tension in the air. Absently she wonders if this is before Dean has admitted that he’s into guys, too, because that might explain some of that. Roy is a fairly good looking guy, after all. He reminds Meira of that guy who played Bond in those movies Dad likes from before she was born. That… probably haven’t even been made yet. Damn it. She’s going to have to be careful with things like that. “I have no idea where I am right now.” She adds, because Roy does not look convinced.

“We’re heading further in, not back out.” He warns her.

Meira shrugs. “You’re still a better option than trying to make it by myself.” And she has absolutely no intention of going anywhere without Dad. It’s not really very rational, but he’s her only point of reference right now, and until she can get her feet under herself and figure out what the fuck to do, she could use the illusion of support. So she grins into the face of Roy’s unimpressed glower. “You know I’m just asking as a formality, right? If you say no, I’ll just follow you anyway, because what the hell else am I gonna do?”

Roy’s glower shades towards resigned, and Meira knows she’s won. Her grin sharpens, and he rolls his eyes, but nods his acceptance. “Come on, then, if you’re coming.” He instructs, heading back the way he came without any further ado, leaving Meira alone with her baby-faced father.

There’s a brief moment where they stare at each other, both of them at a loss, and then Dad – Dean – jerks his head towards the bit of forest Roy disappeared into, and Meira takes that as her cue to fall into step with him. “So, before you were getting lost, what were you doing out here?” Dean asks, looking at her with open curiosity. Then his eyes flicker down and up again, and Meira catches herself before an Enochian exorcism can fall out of her mouth on instinct.

Instead, she switches to the first lie she can come up with that might make her dad stop looking at her like that. “I was running away from a dickbag who wouldn’t take no for an answer.” She says without looking at him.

There’s a beat of silence, and a glance shows Meira that Dean is grimacing. “What an asshole.” He comments, just as they catch up with the others again. Roy looks sour, but he’s attentive, scanning the surroundings with a keen eye, which Meira appreciates, and standing nearby is Uncle Sam. Only he’s a squishy-cheeked, smooth-faced, gangly-limbed baby-Uncle now. Meira has to bite back the urge to coo and possibly pinch his cheeks.

The other two in the group are people Meira doesn’t recognise, a teenage boy with close-cropped hair, and a young woman with cute dimples that show when she smiles at Meira in greeting. Meira smiles back with extra warmth. “This is my brother, Sam.” Dean says, taking it upon himself to do introductions. “And this is Haley and Ben Collins. Their brother’s gone missing, which is why we’re here, looking for him.” He explains, gesturing.

“I hope we find him.” Meira says, specifically to Haley. She’s just decided that Haley is her salvation, and she offers her hand to the other woman to shake. “I’m Meira.” Haley takes her hand with just a hint of befuddlement.

“Alright, let’s keep moving.” Roy calls, before Meira can add anything else. She does let her hand linger, though, just a touch, before she retracts it. Their group moves off again, and Meira makes it a point to walk beside Haley.

“Tell me about your brother?” She asks, just to strike up conversation.

Haley glances at her sideways, but obliges. It’s clear she loves her family, just the way she talks about them, and Meira catches herself smiling for real, and not just as a flirtation, although it’s that as well. She does make a point to tell Haley how admirable she thinks it is, that sort of devotion to family, and Haley ducks her head with a rueful smile, bashful.

Behind them, Sam snickers. Meira glances back and catches a disgruntled pout on her dad’s face before he smooths it out into something more neutral once he realises she’s looking. She makes a bit of a show of glancing between Haley and Dean, and then grins, unrepentant, and shrugs in faux-apology. Dean snorts and waves her off, conceding defeat gracefully enough.

When Meira turns back around, Haley is watching her, one eyebrow arched. Meira refuses to feel sheepish at being caught out, and just nudges her with her shoulder, gentle and teasing, and asks her another question about her life. Haley rolls her eyes, but answers.

The conversation carries them on through the afternoon, until they reach a point where Roy stops. It’s almost a clearing, if it wasn’t for the waist-high undergrowth. “This is it.” Roy says, looking about them. “Blackwater Ridge.”

“What coordinates are we at?” Uncle Sam asks at once. Roy answers, and Meira aches a little at just how incomprehensible the numbers are. Before, she would have just known where she was, and she feels a little sick, being made aware of just how little she can tell about the world around her now. She looks around, hating how small she feels, how muffled everything is. She doesn’t dare try to reach out with her grace again, but she wants to, just to make that feeling of wrong go away.

“I’m going to go take a look around.” Roy announces.

Meira whips around to give him an incredulous look. He might not be in the know, might not realise that Sam and Dean are probably on a hunt right now, but even so, it seems reckless for anyone to go off on their own. “You shouldn’t go off by yourself.” Sam points out, so Meira doesn’t have to.

“I’ll go with you.” Meira offers, since no one else seems like they’re about to.

It earns her incredulous looks from all quarters, and a disparaging one from Roy. Meira gives him a hard look in return, the sort of ‘do you really want to try me, bitch?’ look that Pabbi has always told her makes her look like her qaada. And she might not be able to bring her grace to bear along with it like she usually does, but she is still an angel, no matter how constrained, and it would take a tougher man than Roy Roberts to not even blink in the face of heavenly wrath.

“Look,” he says in a carefully reasonable tone, “I know these woods, and I’m just going to have a look around, see if I can find any signs of people. I’ll be fine. You’ll be safer staying here.”

“You’d be safer staying with the group, too.” Dean interjects, making no effort to sound inoffensive. Roy gives him a sour look.

“Why don’t we all go?” Haley suggests, all false brightness and impatience.

Roy raises his hands in frustrated surrender, and heads off into the woods. The rest of them follow along like good little ducklings. They do spread out a little as they go, looking for any signs of other people in the area. Meira is not an expert woodsman, but she’d learned a few things growing up with a hunter family, and she tries to pay attention, to be helpful.

“Haley! Over here!” Roy shouts suddenly. Everyone bolts towards the shout, and they come out in a clearing with three tents lying there in mangled wreckages, blood-splattered and torn. “Oh my god…” Haley breathes, sounding horrified. Meira doesn’t blame her. She feels a little bit sick, too, and it’s not her brother’s campsite. The thought of something like this happening to Jace makes her want to smite something, and her grace roils under her skin, pushing at the boundaries of her physical form and aching every time it brushes against the inside of her skin.

“Looks like a grizzly.” Roy remarks, cool and practical.

Meira thinks not. Not only because if it was, it’s unlikely her dad and her uncle would be here, but also because there would be more blood and less wanton destruction if it had been a normal animal. If a bear had been hungry enough to hunt people, there would be a lot more blood, at least, and if it was pissed at them being on its territory, there would be bodies. But there aren’t. Just a bit of blood splattered about here and there, and a lot of claw marks.

Haley begins shouting for her brother, and Meira grabs her arm before she can walk any further into the camp. “Don’t.” She warns, eyeing the surrounding woods warily.

“What?” Haley demands, eyes a little wild. “Why not?”

“Something might still be out there.” Sam interjects, giving Meira a respectful nod. She tries to smile back, but she’s not too proud to admit that she’s scared. She ought to be able to tell what did this, to feel the spirits and souls around her and know. But she can’t.

“Sam!” Dean calls, and Sam heads off at a brisk clip.

Meira heads after him on instinct. Haley follows her for about three steps before Ben calls out in a voice that wavers despite his best efforts, and she turns back to him without hesitation. Meira catches up to Sam just in time to hear Dean saying “-tell you what, it’s no skin-walker or black dog.” Then Dean turns and stalls at the sight of her. “Uh…” He says, staring at her like a deer in the headlights.

In other circumstances, Meira might glory in making her dad look like that for once, instead of the other way around, but she’s still feeling unnerved enough that it’s hard to wring any humour out of the situation. “Why are we ruling out skin-walkers and black dogs?” She asks, propping her shoulder on a tree and crossing her arms. It looks less pathetic than curling her arms around her sides, but it still serves to make herself feel better. What would be best would be a hug from her dad, but there’s no way she’d ask for that when he’d probably just take it the wrong way.

“You-” Sam begins, realisation dawning in his expression.

“You’re a Hunter?” Dean demands.

“More or less.” Meira agrees. It’s never been a title that sits right on her shoulders. Not when she’s spent her whole life surrounded by people who actually dedicated themselves to the job, while she’s always felt more like a kid mucking about with a hobby. At Dean’s sceptical, bordering on suspicious look, she elaborates. “I was raised to it, but I’ve never… dedicated myself to it.” She hedged. “I just help out here and there when something crosses my path.”

“Right.” Dean acknowledges, and then jerks his head towards something behind him. Meira comes closer to look, and Dean explains the tracks. It’s almost like being a kid again, with Dad schooling her on this or that aspect of hunting.

“A skin-walker or a black dog could drag a person away, but you’re right, the tracks just stopping like that is weird.” Meira acknowledges, wracking her brains for what could do this. “A phantom cat could, too. Or a wendigo or a moonfiend. Or a harpy, maybe. It’s too early for a werewolf.”

“Werewolves don’t tend to drag their victims off, never mind vanish with them.” Dean points out.

“What’s a moonfiend?” Sam asks.

Meira blinks, reminded suddenly that this is not really her uncle. “It’s a… It’s kind of like a mothman, but less aggressive. They’re mostly harmless, actually, really shy, but if they’ve staked out a territory, you don’t want to go wandering into it.” She explains absently. “It’s just that they can fly, which would explain…” She gestures at the vanishing tracks. “Like Harpies. Wendigos are strong and agile enough to lift a human body, and phantom cats are spirits. It’s possible a phantom cats could transport a victim that way, but they don’t tend to drag people off, either.”

“Phantom cat. That’s the animal version of a poltergeist, right?” Dean checks.

Meira nods. “Yeah, pretty much. Although normal poltergeists generally just want to hurt or kill you, but some legends suggest that phantom cats steal souls.”

“The pattern of attacks would suggest it’s hunting, not protecting territory, so I don’t think it’s a moonfiend.” Sam adds with a grimace.

The three of them look at each other, all of them coming to the same conclusion, none of them actually willing to say it out loud. Before someone can muster their courage, the forest air is shattered with a shout.

“HELP!”

Meira startles, and then lurches into a run before she’s had time to think. Of course, Dean and Sam are already on the move, too, even as a second, and then a third cry echoes through the forest. They converge with the others, a wordless scream that sounds closer than ever egging them on. Then the forest goes silent, and they slow to a stop, wary and alert, listening hard. “It seemed like it was coming from around here, didn’t it?” Haley asks.

Meira feels painfully vulnerable, and she tests her grace, to see if she can conjure her blade. It’s made from her grace, and it’s still there, so the blade should be there, but when she tries to manifest it, a lance of white-hot pain ricochets through her, and she clutches at her wrist, gritting her teeth against the agony.

“Everybody back to camp.” Sam orders, and Meira obeys on instinct. She’s never felt so vulnerable before in her entire life, and it only gets worse when she realises they’ve fallen for a trap and all their gear is gone. Before, she wouldn’t have worried. She’s an angel, she can survive off the ambient energy of the universe if she needs to. It’s not fun, but it’s possible. But now, she has no idea what she can and can’t do. Her grace is still there, warming her bones, but every time she reaches for it, all she gets is pain.

“Alright, listen up.” Sam says briskly, looking around the camp with a tight expression on his face. “It’s time to go. Things have gotten more complicated.”

“What?” Haley asks, incredulous and irritated.

“Kid, don’t worry. Whatever’s out there, I think I can handle it.” Roy says, and Meira’s tempted to deck him for the condescending arrogance in his voice.

“If you don’t even know what it is, you have no idea whether you can handle it.” She snaps. It seems to startle everyone, but Meira doesn’t care. Yesterday, a wendigo wouldn’t have frightened her. She could move faster than it, could burn it to death with just a touch of the holy light in her soul, but today, she’s as helpless as Roy Roberts, and it pisses her off that he’s not as scared as she is.

“Sweetheart, when you’ve been hunting as long as I have, there isn’t much the woods can throw at you that you can’t handle.” Roy retorts smugly.

Meira scoffs incredulously, suddenly hating him. “Oh, that’s what this is. Did Sam taking charge just now wound your fragile male ego? Are you really going to put everyone here at risk because of your god damned pride?”

“How dare you suggest-”

“Hey, relax.” Dean interjects. Even though it isn’t directed at her, Meira can’t help but subside, too used to Dad mediating arguments between her and Jace, or her and Rob, or her and Pabbi that way.

Apparently, Uncle Sam hasn’t gotten the memo, though. “She’s right.” He says, as if Dad hadn’t said anything at all. “You have no idea what’s out there, what it can do. I’m just trying to protect you.”

“You, protect me?” Roy scoffs. “I was hunting these woods when your mommy was still kissing you goodnight.” He spits, getting into Uncle Sam’s face.

“Isn’t it about time you retired, then?” Meira snarks.

“You shut your mouth.” Roy barks, rounding on her.

“Okay, that’s enough!” Dad snaps, getting between them with both his hands out as if to physically hold them away from each other. “Just chill out, okay?” He prompts, giving Uncle Sam a pointed look. Meira tucks her arms around herself and tries not to freak out any more than she already has. Haley putting a hand on her shoulder makes her jump, but the comforting squeeze she gets helps a little.

“We don’t have time, Dean. We have to get these people out of here before this thing eats them alive.” Uncle Sam protests furiously.

“Look.” Haley speaks up, interrupting whatever Roy had been about to say in answer to that. “Tommy might still be alive.” She states, and Meira knows what’s coming next. She knows, because it’s what she’d say if it was Jace out here, in the claws of a wendigo. It’s what Dad would say if it was Uncle Sam. “And I’m not leaving here without him.”

“Then we’re going to need fire.” Meira says. “Lots and lots of fire.”

Blackwater Ridge, Lost Creek, Colorado – Saturday 12th November 2005

They build up a large campfire, and several smaller fires, too, and Meira helps her dad draw protective symbols around their camp. And then they sit and wait for morning or the wendigo, whichever comes first. The hours draw on interminably, and Meira sits right by the fire, close enough that she feels a little feverish with the heat baking her face, but it’s close enough that she could grab one of the big branches out of the fire if she needed to.

Sitting and waiting isn’t the best plan though, she thinks grimly. For morning, yes. Wendigos don’t really like bright sunlight, so they’ll have that small advantage once the sun rises, but after that? Haley isn’t leaving without her brother, and her brother, if he’s still alive, will be in the wendigo’s lair. Which they’ll need to find, and get into, and get out of, without dying or getting caught themselves.

“What’re you thinking?” Haley asks quietly, nudging her.

Meira glances at her, sees how worried she looks, and musters up a smile. “I’m trying to figure out how we’re going to find Tommy.” Haley blinks, then almost smiles, except not really. Meira knows the feeling, and goes back to staring at the fire. “Even if we kill this thing, we’d still need to find him, and… Shit, that’s a lot of wilderness to comb through.”

“We’ll do it.” Haley insists stubbornly. “I’ll do it.”

Meira smiles, slanting a fond look at her. “I know.” She assures her. “I have a little brother, too. I’d take on a wendigo for him, too.” That wouldn’t really have been saying much before, but now? Like this? She still means it.

“A…” Haley falters, frowning. “I’ve heard of that before. Isn’t that some sort of Native legend or something?”

Meira nodded. “Algonquian peoples, primarily. They tended to live more northward, where the long, lean winters often led to starvation. And starvation sometimes led to people who who looked at their families and friends, and saw not people they loved, but food.” Haley shudders in distaste. “And once they’ve eaten someone, they start craving it, and every time they eat someone else, they turn a little bit more monstrous.”

Haley gives her a sharp look, fear buried under anger. “You mean this thing’s going to eat Tommy?” She demands in a harsh whisper.

“It’s planning to, yeah. But it probably hasn’t yet.” Meira reassures, reaching out to put an arm around Haley’s shoulders. Haley grabs her other wrist in a desperate, unthinking motion, clinging to hope. “Wendigos are born of deprivation, they know what it’s like to go hungry, and they hate it. They tend to hunt in spurts, and hibernate for long stretches of time in between, but they don’t gorge themselves. They’ll take people alive if they can, so they have food for later.”

Haley squeezes her eyes shut. Then she sets her jaw and nods. “How can we kill this thing?” She asks in a hard voice.

Meira looks away. “I’m starting to wonder if we should.” She admits.

“What?” Haley asks, so sharply that Sam and Dean look over at them from where they’re sitting together across the fire, heads bent together and discussing something.

Meira opens her mouth to explain what she’s thinking, what she doesn’t want to be thinking, but before she can, someone out in the woods calls for help. She cringes, even as everyone else leaps to their feet, those with guns aiming them out into the night. She knows that it’s the wendigo, knows that it isn’t some poor bastard getting chowed on, but… well, before, she would have known, would have felt it, would have been able to tell for sure that, no, the only soul out there is the corrupted one of the wendigo. Now, all she has to go on is cold logic. It’s enough to convince her head, but not her soul.

Some part of her still feels the need to go and check, to be sure, because what if she’s just sitting here, listening to someone die when she could have helped them? Then the gunfire starts up. “I hit it!” Roy shouts suddenly, and Meira’s head jerks up just in time to see him dodging around one of their extra fires and rushing out into the woods.

She’s on her feet before she can think about it. Then she hesitates. What is she going to do, without her grace? But she can’t just leave him to his fate, either, no matter how much she doesn’t like him. “Don’t move!” Her dad orders, right before going after Roy himself.

That cinches it, really. Meira’s not leaving her dad out there with a wendigo. She snatches up one of the burning sticks, and bolts after them. “Meira!” Uncle Sam shouts, reaching out to try and grab her, but Meira’s played that game a million times, it’s habit to flex her grace to give herself just a little bit more speed so that she’s not where he expects her to be.

And this time, it works.

It’s such a relief she nearly stumbles, but she doesn’t have time to waste, so she catches her balance and runs on. She’s right behind Dad, and Roy is up ahead, and she can hear the wendigo in the trees. “It’s over here!” The wendigo calls with someone else’s voice, and Meira can see it reaching for Roy. The world blurs as she lunges, practically tackling Roy out of the way just as the wendigo’s hands flash out and the claws sink into her face.

She could retaliate, she has her stick, but she remembers the thoughts that had been plaguing her earlier, and doesn’t.

The wendigo jerks her, hard, but Meira’s grace isn’t gone. It’s just trapped, which means that when her neck snaps, it’s nothing more than a minor inconvenience. Painful, sure, but her grace heals the damage almost as soon as it’s been done. The wendigo gives her another shake, nearly breaking her neck again, and then wrenches the burning stick away from her, tossing it back down to the ground. She lets it, because she doesn’t want to have to heal being eaten, and then plays limp ragdoll as the wendigo darts off through the trees with her. It won’t fool it forever, but it should fool it long enough for it to take her back to its lair.

They drop back to the forest floor eventually, and then further down still, underground, Meira realises. A cave, or an abandoned mine, perhaps. She’s tossed into a larger cavern, lets herself roll limply along the floor, and the wendigo retreats. Meira’s just going to have to hope that her dad and uncle can keep Haley and Ben alive through the night.

“Ugh.” She groans and sits up, rubbing at the back of her neck. She’s human enough that that sort of damage is still unnerving, and leaves her feeling vaguely squeamish for hours afterwards. So worth it just to know her grace still works, though.

“Holy shit!”

Meira stills, looking around. The cavern is not, in fact, pitch black. There’s faint light seeping in from somewhere above her head, moonlight, and it’s just about enough for her to see by. There’s a man strung up from the rafters that looks enough like Haley and Ben that Meira feels pretty safe in guessing “Tommy Collins?”

“Yeah.” Tommy says breathlessly. “I thought you were dead.”

“That’s what I wanted it to think.” Meira tells him with a shrug, clambering to her feet and dusting herself off. “Now, let’s see if we can’t get you down.” She wishes, briefly but intensely, for her blade. It’s right there, sitting inside her soul, and she can’t manifest it. Instead, she casts about for something in the cave that they’re in, and settles on a broken shard of rock from the floor of the cave. It worked for prehistoric people well enough.

“How- how’d you know who I am?” Tommy asks after Meira’s been sawing at the ropes for a few minutes. They’re starting to fray, finally, which is a relief.

“Your brother and sister have come looking for you.” Meira tells him. “Brought me and a couple others along with them.”

“Oh, god.” Tommy groans. “Are they okay?”

“Worried about you, but otherwise, yeah. Last I saw, anyway. And D- Dean and Sam know how to handle a wendigo. They’ll look after them, I promise.” Tommy lets out a shuddering breath, nodding to himself.

“I think this is backwards.” Tommy says in a tone of forced cheer. Meira hums curiously, scowling at the rope as she continues to work at it. “We’ll the beautiful damsel is rescuing the handsome knight from the monster.” He points out.

Meira snorts her way into laughter, and leans back to get a better look at him. “You are cute.” She acknowledges, and in other circumstances, she might have flirted back, because she’s gotten the feeling that both Haley and Tommy are straight. “But your sister’s cuter.” She adds, going back to her work. The rope gives way before Tommy manages to muster up a response to that. He staggers when he drops, having been strung up for so long and deprived of sustenance that his balance is shot to shit. Meira catches him and slings one of his arms over her shoulder. “Do you know if your friends are still alive?” She asks him. There’s no one else in this cave, she doesn’t think, although she can’t be entirely sure of that with her grace locked down like this, but she’s pretty sure this won’t be the only place the wendigo has to stash its snacks.

She feels more than sees Tommy shake his head. “N-no, it-” He stammers out. “Oh god.” He says, and Meira recognises that tone well enough to shift the way she’s supporting him so that when he doubles over and retches, she doesn’t get covered in bile.

“Easy.” Meira soothes, rubbing a hand over his back. He dry heaves a few more times, but manages to regain control of himself after that. “Yeah, I can’t imagine watching something like that was any fun.” She muses, tugging him back upright and setting off. She hopes she can remember the way out. “Let’s get you out of here.”

“What about- about that thing?” Tommy asks her as they stagger along, into the first of several pitch-black tunnels.

“It’s almost certainly out in the woods right now, hunting the others.” Meira tells him, which she is aware is not as comforting as it could be, given that ‘the others’ includes family for both of them. Tommy swears, and Meira grimaces, figuring she can at least help a little bit. “Sam and Dean know how to handle something like this.” She assures him. “And they have plenty of fire. They’ll keep Haley and Ben safe. And I’m going to keep you safe.”

“In normal circumstances, that would sound ridiculous.” Tommy mutters.

“Don’t be sexist.” Meira chides, but she keeps her tone light, and gives him a gentle little jostle with her shoulder to let him know she’s mostly teasing. Then she sobers, because short of actually eating her alive, which admittedly is a possibility, the wendigo can’t kill her, but it could definitely kill Tommy, and if he’s going to play machismo bullshit because she’s a lady, she really does need to nip that in the bud. “But I’m serious. If it does come back, if we run into it, don’t you dare try to play the hero, alright?” She puts a touch of divine command into her tone. “I am not your responsibility, do not wait for me, do not come back for me, do not try to throw yourself into harms way to protect me. Am I clear?”

“Yes, ma’am.” Tommy mumbles, resentful and bewildered.

The rest of the slog out of the mines is made in silence, save for Tommy’s ragged breathing and Meira’s occasional curse when she makes a wrong turn and they have to double back. Finally, though, Meira picks out a hint of light and follows it to the exit. It looks like it might have been boarded up once, but the wendigo has made a neat little opening for itself, and she and Tommy stagger out into in the dim grey-blue light of false dawn.

Tommy chokes back a sob of relief. Meira grins at the sound and shifts him higher on her shoulder. “Come on, we don’t want to get caught here if it comes back.” She points out, and that convinces Tommy to pick up his pace. It’s still slow going, because he’s still pretty unhealthy after two days chained up in a cave with minimal sustenance. The wendigo probably wouldn’t have fed him, but they had been known to give captives water. They also have undergrowth to contend with now, and Meira might heal a broken ankle, but Tommy won’t.

“Where… are the others?” Tommy asks.

Which is a hell of a good question. “I have no idea.” Meira tells him, feigning cheer. “Right now our priorities are water and some way of making fire.” She informs him, and Tommy drags them to a stop.

Tommy clearly knows more about wilderness survival than she does, because within a few minutes of her pointing out a need for it, Tommy has somehow managed to get a small fire going. They’re still too close to the wendigo’s lair for Meira’s comfort, but having a weapon that might actually do something to it is more important than trying to escape something that could outstrip a bullet. They build up a campfire, draw some protective sigils, and Meira fashions them both makeshift torches, wishing bitterly that she wasn’t reduced to such primitive tools all the while.

Meira risks leaving Tommy alone with the sigils to protect him just long enough to see if she can find any hint of running water nearby. She does, so they relocate, going through the whole process of warding all over again, this time closer to the water. Tommy looks a lot better for the chance to drink and wash his face, and then they have to figure out what the hell to do next.

“Finding the others ought to be priority over killing the wendigo.” Meira muses. “There’s just the problem of how to actually go about that.”

Tommy nods grimly. “If it wasn’t for the monster out there that wants to eat us, I’d say set up a base camp, search outwards, leave signs.” He summarises. Meira is about to suggest that they should do exactly that, then, when a furious snarl echoes through the woods. Tommy flinches so hard he falls over where he’s sitting, only barely catching himself with one hand in the dirt.

“Think it noticed we’re missing?” Meira asks rhetorically.

They sit, tense and wary, in the ensuing silence, waiting for something to happen. It doesn’t for long enough that Meira begins to wonder if she should do something. Then the yelling starts. “Help! Help me!” Meira clenches her hands into fists, heart squeezing.

“You know that’s not going to work, right?” She calls, standing slowly and bringing two of their burning sticks with her, one in each hand. Tommy hisses at her, grabbing at the hem of her coat as if that might make her sit and stop baiting the monster. A snarl answers her words, echoing oddly as the wendigo moves mid-sound and the doppler effect turns it multi-toned. “What? Pissed because you couldn’t kill me? We’re pretty tough prey, I bet you’ve figured by now. All this exertion must be making you kinda hungry.”

The roar that follows shakes the forest, full of fury and malice, and Meira nearly giggles hysterically. She only has the barest idea of what she’s doing, and her hands are shaking with the terror of having a predator that’s bigger than her focused solely on her, but she knows, she knows from painful, bitter experience that making someone angry makes them sloppy in the short term. And any advantage she can wring out of this situation, she needs.

Tauntingly, she steps a little closer to the edge of the protective sigils. And there it is, sprinting too fast for the mortal eye to catch, close enough to make the underbrush rustle right next to where Meira is standing, but not quite close enough for her to hit with one of her torches. Meira doesn’t want to start a forest fire, but oh, boy, is she tempted right now. “Is that supposed to scare me?” She mocks.

The wendigo rushes by again, and then- stops. In plain view. Not even looking at her. Tommy makes a choked noise of horror, and the wendigo doesn’t even twitch. Meira is so tempted to lunge out of the sigils at it, but it’s too easy, and she hesitates. She hesitates like an idiot until it’s suddenly gone, bounding off into the forest, and she realises what must have happened.

It heard something she couldn’t. Something that was easier prey.

“For fuck’s sake!” She explodes, and goes after it, even though it’s probably going to get her eaten.

“Hey! Hey, wait!” Tommy calls.

“Stay in the circle!” Meira calls over her shoulder. “If it comes back, set it on fire!”

The wendigo appears in front of her in an instant. Meira swings on instinct, a little too slow because she’s so off her game right now, but a little too slow is still something, because the flames pass by the wendigo’s emaciated flesh with inches to spare, and it must feel the heat, because it shrieks, an awful, too human sound of pain. A huge clawed hand strikes out, and tears right through the sleeve of her leather coat and into the flesh beneath. “Shit!” She curses, pained and indignant in equal measure, because if she’s guessing right about the limits on her abilities, she’s not going to be able to fix that.

“Meira?!” Uncle Sam’s voice shouts.

The wendigo ignores him, which means Meira succeeded in pissing it off. She ducks the second set of claws aiming for her throat, and then swings both torches up and in. They crash into either side of the wendigo’s head, and the smell of scorched flesh fills the forest just as Sam skids into view. The wendigo screams, rearing back and disappointingly not dead. Meira gears up for another swing, and the wendigo bolts. It’s gone in a flash, and Meira is about to go after it, to press her advantage, but then Uncle Sam is right in front of her, eyes wide. “Are you alright?” He demands, looking between her face and her arm.

“I’ll be fine.” Meira assures him, lowering her arms and hissing when the wound pulls. “My jacket on the other hand…” She bitches, tugging at the shoulder to get a better look at the tears. She whines when she gets a proper look at the damage.

“You bitch-slapped a wendigo in the face with a medieval torch, and you’re just upset about your jacket?” Sam asks incredulously.

Meira considers that. “I… huh. That was pretty cool, wasn’t it?” Sam snorts, shaking his head like he genuinely can��t believe her. Meira grins, before the situation catches up with her, and she jerks her head back the way she came. “We should get behind the wards I set up if we’re going to catch up.”

Sam, though, shakes his head. “I’ve gotta-” He gestures after the wendigo. Meira is just about to point out that running off half-cocked is going to get him dead, despite the disorientation of having to tell her Uncle that, when he goes on. “It took Dean and Haley.”

Meira stares at him for a long moment, then tips her head back. “Oh, you’ve gotta be kidding me!” She whines at the sky. “I just got Tommy out!”

“You got Tommy?” Sam echoes, brightening.

Meira nods, and realises there’s really only one thing for her to do. “I’ll wait with him while you go help the others?” She offers, and Sam nods once, sharp and decisive. Meira thrusts one of the torches at him. “Here. Take that.” Sam does, muttering a quick thanks before he’s rushing off again, and Meira goes back to sit with Tommy.

It’s not even half an hour later when she hears footsteps, people moving through the woods, and then the others appear through the trees, all of them in a straggly exhausted group. Haley and Ben both let out cries of relief when they see their brother, and stumble into a sort of run while Tommy clambers to his feet in order to embrace them.

“Wendigo’s dead?” Meira checks.

“Yeah.” Dean confirms. “Shot it point blank with a flaregun.” He adds proudly. Meira whistles, impressed. Dean grins back at her. “Heard you hit it in the face with a torch?” He asks, jerking his head at Sam to indicate just where he heard that. “Pretty awesome.”

Meira shrugs, grinning bashfully. “I did what I could.”

Then she realises that Roy is watching her very intently. He looks more than a little worse for wear, something a bit wild around his eyes that suggests he’s not taking the existence of the supernatural very well at all. “You’re alive.” He says when Meira catches his eye.

“Yeah.” Meira confirms.

Roy swallows. “Coulda sworn that thing broke your neck.” He says, all of a sudden not quite able to look at her and instead staring somewhere over her shoulder.

“Oh, man, it tried.” She replied, grinning in a strange, giddy relief at the memory of how easily her grace had healed her. “Shook me like a ragdoll. But I’m fine.” She adds to reassure him, because he still looks a bit haunted.

Roy nods. There’s a long pause, and then he clears his throat. “You saved my life. When I was being an idiot.” He adds briskly, grimacing at himself. “Thank you.”

Meira shrugs, smiling ruefully. “Just because you’re an asshole, doesn’t mean you deserve to die.”

Dean snorts in amusement at that, and interrupts before Roy can say anything else. It doesn’t look like he knows what to say in any case. “Come on, let’s get back to civilisation. I don’t know about any of you lot, but I’m getting a little sick of these woods.”

No one’s going to object to that, so they get themselves organised, and follow Roy’s recovered GPS out of the forest. Along the way they discuss what, exactly, to tell the authorities, getting their stories straight. Meira’s mostly quiet as they hike, trying to figure out what she’s going to do now. Ideally, she wants to stick with Dean and Sam, but she isn’t entirely sure how to go about inviting herself along. She knows from her dad’s stories that he and Uncle Sam had been kind of codependent when they were younger, and trying to insert herself into such a close-knit dynamic is going to difficult.

She still hasn’t come up with any good ideas when they get back to a road and call the paramedics. Then it’s all chaos as everyone asks questions and gets medical attention. Sam tries to point the paramedics at Meira, but Meira dodges them with the excuse that it was just a scratch, she’ll be fine. “Hey.” Someone says behind her, and she turns to find Haley standing there, looking exhausted and overwhelmed.

“Hey, you alright?” Meira checks, touching her lightly on the arm.

Haley nods. “Thanks to you.” Meira shakes her head, but Haley presses the point. “You saved Tommy. You saved my brother.”

Meira relents with a smile, and shifts her hand up to brush her knuckles lightly over Haley’s cheek. “I’m glad I could help.” She says sincerely. Haley huffs, smiling incredulously.

“You never let up, do you?” She asks.

Meira shrugs and retreats. “I do mean it.” She points out.

Haley considers her for a long moment, then nods. “Yeah, I got that.” She acknowledges. Then she glances over to where Dean is finally escaping the paramedics himself. “I should go and say thank you to them, too.” She says, and Meira nods, watching her go. She watches them talk for a moment, before an idea occurs to her, and she hurries off to pickpocket a ranger, talk to Roy, and then circle back around to Haley. She gets there just in time to hear her say “Must you cheapen the moment?”

“Yeah.” Dean replies, as if it should be obvious.

Haley shakes her head, catches sight of Meira, and rolls her eyes. “The pair of you, I swear.” She huffs, and Meira grins. She’s heard it before, mostly from Qaada. Dad always protested that she’s way more like Pabbi, but given that the pair of them are the same flavour of irreverent flirt, she figures that’s one and the same.

Meira flips her stolen pen over in her fingers and proffers it to Haley. Haley takes it with a quizzical expression, while Meira shoves up her sleeve and presents her arm to her. “Gimme your number, and once I can get my hands on a new phone, I’ll text you.”

Haley narrows her eyes playfully. “And why should I?”

For once, Meira doesn’t rise to the bait. “Because then if you get into any other trouble, or if you see anything else weird, you can call me.” She explains. Haley’s eyes widen a little, and then she nods and scribbles a phone number onto Meira’s arm.

“Smooth.” Dean comments, half complimentary, half resentful, and Meira elbows him in retaliation. He elbows her back.

Haley shakes her head at both of them again, and then, surprising the hell out of Meira, she leans in and kisses them each on the cheek, Meira, and then Dean. “I hope you find your father.” She says to Dean, who sobers at that, and then Sam and Ben amble over and Haley guides Ben off to go to the hospital with their brother.

“You going to be alright getting home?” Dean asks, startling Meira out of watching the little family leave in the ambulance.

Meira winces, trying not to think too hard about exactly how far away from home she really is. Dean catches it and raises his eyebrows at her. Over his shoulder, Sam is frowning in concern. “Don’t really have one of those anymore.” She admits quietly, since it’s mostly true. She’s just muddling her tenses a little bit. She swallows and glances sideways at Dean. “Mind if I hitch a ride with you guys?”

Dean glances back at Sam, who shrugs. “Sure.” Dean says, a little uncertainly. “I guess.”

Relief makes Meira’s shoulders slump. “Thanks.”

“You really don’t have anywhere to go, huh?” Sam asks, sounding sympathetic.

Meira gives a slightly bitter laugh at that. “No, I don’t. It’s… it’s all gone.” She raises her arms a little in indication. “This is everything I have right now.”

“Shit.” Dean breathes. “What happened?”

“What always happens to hunters.” Meira hedges, tucking her hands into her pockets and hunching into her coat uncomfortably. It’s not even entirely a lie. “They missed one, and it came back to bite them.”

“Well, you can stick with us for a while.” Sam offers.

“Thanks. I don’t mind helping you look for your dad for a while as repayment.” Meira replies, and they both nod their acceptance. Then Dean tips his head towards the Impala, and Meira goes, aware of the pair of them following along behind her.

She’s pretty sure she’s not really meant to hear it when Dean says, in an undertone. “Sam, you know we’re going to find Dad, right?”

“Yeah, I know.” Sam agrees heavily. “But in the meantime… I’m driving.”

There’s a long pause, long enough for Meira to reach the back door of the Impala and turn to look at them. She’s just in time to see Dean flip the keys across to Sam, and she ducks her head on a smile. As long as she’s stuck here in the past, this is exactly where she wants to be; with her family.

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rocknrollbodhisattva · 5 years

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The Paranormal and the Sitcom: A So Weird & Girl Meets World Crossover Essay

Inspired by @fi-phillips | @thats-so-weird | @boymeetsworldconfessions | @rilaya | @rileymatthews-xo

Introduction

From 1999 to 2001, Zoog Disney aired a paranormal show named So Weird, the Disney version of the X-Files. Micheal Jacobs revived Boy Meets World with a continuation called Girl Meets World. On the surface So Weird and Girl Meets World have nothing in common. The former show filmed in Canada, the latter was filmed in California. Cooksney and Jacobs couldn't be more different, Jacobs is known for comedic sitcoms like My Two Dads, John Astole and producer Jon Cooksney, focused on speculative fiction. Astole worked on Stargate, and the 1980s Twilight Zone revivals. Disney Channel hosting their television shows is their only commonalities so far. What made these programs successful was pushing Disney's Astole limits on what considered acceptable. As a result, So Weird was the darkest show Disney Channel aired where Girl Meets World was one of the smarter television shows of modern Disney Channel. Audiences don't think of Disney tackling death acceptance, religion, or feminism

Fiona "Fi" Philips (Cara DeLizia) along with her older brother Jack, join their mother Molly Phillips (Makenzie (Phillips) on her comeback tour. Having a Rockstar mom isn't easy, especially when evil spirits begin stalking Fiona. When Annie (Alexz Johnson) arrives a paranormal panther follows suit. Riley Matthews (Rowen Blanchard) along with her best friend Maya Hart (Sabrina Carpenter) continue the lessons her father learned almost Boy Meets World. At six years old I loved stories about hauntings and dark creatures, so, So Weird naturally appealed to me. Nostalgia over Boy Meets World influenced my decision to watch its sequel and the quality of it surprised me. This cross-over essay's purpose is dissecting these shows popularity and their similarities rather than their differences.

Surface Similarities & Differences

At the surface level SW and GMW's similarities are minor., Fi Phillips and Riley Matthews are our brunette primary protagonists; Annie Thelon and Maya Hart are our blonde secondary protagonists. Fandoms hated Annie and Riley because they interfered with the fandoms' favorites then subsequently blamed for the lackluster third seasons. Celebrities Carpenter and Johnzon used their shows as advertisement for their music careers. Actually Disney gave Carpenter a record deal before casting her as Maya. Carpenter is talented but still sounds like a Disney pop star, however, Johnson has more experience. SW had better music because there was a larger variety of genres like Rock, Pop, Blues, and Celtic music. SW alluded to Celtic and Greek mythology like changelings and sirens. GMW alluded to BMW and nothing else like Cory and Shawn's jellybean scene. Both shows had actors who appeared in crime shows including Carpenter and Eric von Detten.*1

What else SW and GMW had in common was that they had realistic friendships and family dynamics. Friendships weren't used as problem-solving devices but to deepen the characters. Jack (Patrick Lewis) and Clu (Eric von Detten) hung out because they wanted to not because the plot required them to. Parents were written as people. Molly struggled with widowhood and had goals outside of being a mother. Irene felt inferior to her younger sister and Ned Bell was a biker before he married Irene. In addition, Cory taught History yet offered fatherly advice to his daughter and her friends. Single mother, Katy, struggled with her part-time job and caring for Maya. As siblings, Jack/Fi and Riley/Auggie neither fought constantly nor always got along. 'Singularity' Jack and Fi do nothing but argue but in 'Medium' Jack uses "colourful language" when a psychic angers Fi. In GMW, Riley and Auggie argued in 'Forgiveness' then have a touching moment in 'Christmas Maya.' When writing only children Jacobs and Astole never relied on only child stereotypes instead showing the complexity of being one. Not to mention, as an only child myself, I loved this. Maya and Annie weren't spoiled were confused over siblings concepts, like sharing. Trapped in endless detention, Annie's confused by Jack standoffishness finding out that he falsely believes that Annie's replacing his sister. After assuring him that was never her intention, she and Jack become friends. Likewise, Maya confuses Rucas' (Riley/ Lucas) relationship with that of a brother-sister one because she doesn't understand how siblings act. Siblings are loving and friendly but also bicker like Lucaya (Maya/Lucas). Eventually, they develop sibling dynamics with other characters, Annie/Jack and Maya/Lucas.

Neither show's focus was on romance. SW focused on family while GMW focused on friendship and love interests didn't appear in more than one episode. Jack's girlfriend, Gabe, appeared in 'Angel.' Ryan was Fi's first kiss in 'Second Generation' and GMW had two date episodes. 'Brother' was about Cory and Topanga's date night; 'First Date' was about Lucas and Riley first kiss. If romance wasn't plot important then why did GMW develop a shipping war while SW was immune to such disputes? In comparison to GMW, SW had limited couple options meaning there weren't many options before couples became slash or incestuous Those options are: Annie and Fi with either Clu or Carrey. GMW avoids this pitfall with a diverse amount of characters but started shipping wars by introducing the leads and love interest simultaneously. Fanon favourites were Jack/Annie, Carrey/Molly, Lucas/Maya despite the intended couples are Cory/Topanga, Riley/Lucas, and Fi/Clu.

Why did Anti-Annie fans hate her less than Anti-Riley fans? Again, the fandom hated Riley more because of differences in character casting. If a Jerkass character is among the main cast the fandom automatically absolves them, giving their retribution to the kinder characters. Maya's the "broken bird" so fans will prefer her and discount Riley giving fans reason to pair Maya in a love-hate romance. For extra information on this, TvTropes offers an analysis using Nickelodeon television as examples. SW main characters aren't jerkasses toward their friends meaning Annie gets less hate and Friend-Lovers are on equal levels with Love-Hate ones.

Seekers: Fiona & Riley

Seekers of the 12 Archetypes are constantly searching for expanded knowledge of the world at large or themselves. Riley and Fi want to understand other people's perspectives in a worldly sense (Riley) and supernaturally (Fi). However both are open-minded toward unproven phenomenon as opposed to our blond protagonists who rather "go with the flow." Also as the primary protagonists they possess the most contradictions of their worlds. Fi's an amateur parapsychologist but wants a normal life to protect her family. ('Lightening Rod') Fi is a computer geek struggling academically but loves learning new subjects ('Tulpa', 'Escape', 'Vampire'). In comparison, Riley succeeds with her schoolwork but is naïve to the world around her. ('Pluto') She insecure often becoming victim to peer pressure but craves uniqueness away from her peers ('Popular', 'Jexica') Riley and Annie love feminine hobbies – makeup and shopping – but love masculine pursuits too. Both of them love the outdoors, athletics, but are terrible at sports. ('Ski Lodge' in GMW and 'Sacrifice' in SW) Riley can't make the cheerleading team but loves basketball; Fi fails at baseball but tries appreciates the sport. ('Singularity', 'Rah Rah') Contradictions make them rounded characters but causes internal conflict when they attempt to form a stable Ego.

Upon waking up in the middle of the night, Riley eavesdrops on her parents where she doubts if she's good enough compared to her parents. After all Topanga is a successful lawyer, Cory is a successful teacher, and have a perfect fairytale love. ('Cory & Topanga') Unable to connect with her father, Rick, Fi seeks resemblances between herself and him. Just like Riley's atelphobia, Fi feels disconnected from her family because of her paranormal interests. An example is 'Strange Geometry' where Fi feels betrayed that her mother kept Rick obsession a secret. Since Lucas doesn't differentiate between Riley and Maya during the love triangle, Riley further doubts her worth as a girlfriend. In the pilot and a deleted 'Upstate' scene, Riley molds herself into Maya so she'll have an identity. Constant identity searching is another aspect of the Seeker archetype.

Caretaking drives our protagonists to seek out the world's answers. Fi wants closure with her father yet her investigations aren't just for her benefit, but for the benefits of her loved ones. Molly's friends Rebecca left when she was Fi's age, thus Fi confronts Rebecca's "daughter" so Molly will have some closure of her own. Reluctantly, Fi leads the two of them to Rebecca's house where history repeated itself again; Rebecca's family disappeared again leaving Molly more betrayed and confused. 'In Forgiveness' Riley back talks to Kermit wanting answers as to why he left her best friend when she was younger. Town members become annoyed by Fi when she forces them to remember the alien invasion the day before. ('Memory') Fi helps a coma girl's mother and grandmother with technology to revive the girl from her coma even though these people are strangers to her. ('Lost') Riley invades her friends' boundaries so Maya will have hope ('Master Plan'), tries jumping into a bull pen to save Lucas ('Texas'), and keeps her friends in a stairwell so they'll reflect on their surroundings ('High School'). Fi challenges Bricriu to hangman so he'll stop possessing her brother. ('Will-o-Wisp') Riley gives up her relationship with Shawn, her godfather, so Maya will have a father. She forgets her affections for Lucas so Maya will have a chance at love. ('Texas', 'New Years') Occasionally their actions cause annoyance among their friends but its for the greater good. Sacrificing one's own desires is the key component in the Caretaker's goal.

Creators: Annie & Maya

Creators turn illusion into reality and similar to Seekers, Creators are invested self-identity and possibilities. When we're introduced to Annie and Maya both are immediately drawn to creative fields. By the ending of 'Lightening Rod', Annie confides in Fi that she's always had an eerie connection to music and find inspiration from something as insignificant as a stick. Furthermore, Mr and Mrs Thelon inform Molly that Annie has the ability to master most any instrument. 'In the Darkness', the theme song, shows Annie playing as well as popular instruments like the guitar. Maya gained that same artistic guidance from the stars or a paint war. ('Meets Boy', 'Upstate', 'Maya's Mother'). Partly due to Carpenter portrays her, Maya masters singing and guitar quite easily. ('1961', 'Creativity') An added bonus to Annie's is that they act as retrocognition from her past.

Both blondes quickly give up old lifestyles for chances at an art or singing career. For example, Annie's ecstatic she'll join Molly's band on tour, granted her parents reason this is so Annie will have a normal and balanced life. ('Lightening Rod') Impulsive, Future Maya leaps at the opportunity when she receives a SoHo gallery internship. ('Bay Window') Creators share the fear of not having an identity. When a recording agent steals Annie's voice and likewise when the art teacher grades Maya's painting as incomplete, the girls doubt their self-worth. In 'Carnival' Annie's reflections mock her abilities when she rescues her friends from an evil ringmaster. Season one Maya wonders if Riley was right and Maya's troubled past is responsible for her artistic ability. What's more is that the Creator archetype gives the character a dangerous duality; either they're practical with their art or they drown themselves in their disillusion. Which is why the Orphan archetype lurks beneath the Creator.

The Thelons and Hart families are alive but their actions produce an orphan effect on their daughters. Traveling across the globe before the So Weird eventsprohibitedestablishing permanent roots somewhere. Kermit's physical abandonment compounded with Katy's emotional abandonment ensured that Maya wouldn't have a support system. Although being an only child isn't problematic, not having someone to depend on made connecting with others difficult. Neither would form a real connection until they made surrogate families out of the Phillips and Matthews families. Its not surprising their friends would find them selfish at times.

Death Acceptance

The major difference between Cooksney and Jacobs is Cooskney never intended lessons for So Weird whereas Jacobs' moralizing hindered character development on Girl Meets World. Jacobs's lesson was the vague statement, "People Change People" I'd argue his actual moral is not taking people for instead. Cooksney's moral, if you could consider it one, was sacrifice. Fi gets lost camping and sacrifices immediate help to save Big Foot. ('Sacrifice') Barring those morals, the writers over-arcing themes of both were acceptance. SW's primary theme was death acceptance for the Phillips and Matthews family with the minor theme of childhood acceptance Annie) and Maya. All stories lead back to sex and death, Disney's not going to discuss sexuality, but death resounds through every film since Disney's inception. Also no SW or GMW character was exempt from death confrontation. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross's Five Stages of Grief: Anger, Sadness, Denial, Bargaining, and Acceptance aren't linear and one may never gain acceptance. All the characters are stuck in one of the stages and only Fi gains acceptance.

Earnest Becker's seven reasons why people fear death are as followed:

1. Fear of pain

2. Fear of not knowing what becomes of our bodies

3. How our dependents will manage after our death

4. How our loved ones will cope emotionally after our death

5. Fear of an afterlife, such as eternal oblivion, or Heaven/Hell

6. Fear of dying with an unlived life

7. Fear of dying with uncompleted projects

Thantophobia is why humans behave the way they do. Rick's untimely death when Fi was three-years-old affected her because she has no memories of her father. She often resented her brother and mother because they knew him and she did not. Rick/Fi's shared fear is emotionally coping of his death. Maya struggled with coping with the metaphorical death of her father, possibly thinking he's dead to her. Kermit intentionally abandoned his family, whereas Rick intended on returning to his family, but he didn't plan on evil spirits murdering him. Fi and Maya are stuck in the anger phase of grieving. When her grandfather is visited by a banshee, Fi tracks the creature down and asks Death personified the fairness in taking her father away from her. Death responds that it will even the imbalance by extending her grandfather's life for a time. But for seasons 1 and 2 Fi copes with death by actively seeking the paranormal afterlife to escape and accept death.

Jack's death phobia is similar to Fi's except he fears losing his sister and mother like he lost his father; his nightmare is a manifestation of that fear. In the midst of gang's lucid dream, Jack leaves them for a method to awaken from the dream but is transported to the night of Rick's. Dream Rick promises he'll return, but knowing the future Jack chases after his father. Fear trapped Jack in Grief's denial stage subsequently causing his resentment of the paranormal his dad loved so much. And it's not until 'Changeling' when Jack accepts his dad's death when he starts singing again. Surprised, Clu comments that Jack hadn't sung since Rick died. Jack responds with, "Well, maybe it's time I started again."

Minor episodes such as 'Fall' (SW) and 'Gravity' (GMW) discuss death on a smaller scale. 'Fall' details Ned and his childhood friend, Sam, on the death anniversary of their other friend's drowning. Haunted by the memory, Sam is literally haunted by Pete's ghost leading to Pete's recent. The men's responses to death are vastly different; Ned would rather forget Pete's death and Sam tries to confront it. Both are part of the grieving sequence but overall, 'Fall' discuses the myriad of complex emotions after death. Childhood deaths are rightly considered "Bad Deaths" whether or not loved ones are complicit with the death, we often feel that we could've prevented it. Sam is stuck in the bargaining and grieving stages before he can move on. As the men relive that fateful day admits he was scared of dying and can finally accept death now. In 'Gravity' the teens are crushed when a beloved bakery owner dies leaving the bakery to Topanga. The episode ends with Auggie opening his gift with a note reading "It's not My-Kranian bakery, I'm dead." Cory phones telling him that he is glad Feeney isn't dead, perhaps this was an allusion to 'I Dream of Feeney' when Cory wished him ill. Riley gives the eulogy and everyone learns to cherish their loved ones while they're alive.

Next is Molly and her death phobia in the series. Molly's emotions toward her husband are erratic in all three seasons. It's been over a decade since Rick's death and she still hasn't accepted it. In the Christmas episode 'Fountain' Molly admits to a young Fi that her loss bothers her. In 'Medium' Molly began to resent Rick's memory because she felt haunted by him wishing that she could forget him. Molly misses being a lover but is guilt-ridden because she feels like she is betraying her husband. ('Fathom') And in season 3's 'Muse,' Molly and the band travel to the town of their first concert to recapture the inspiration she felt there. Molly never gains acceptance over death and I loved that this option was shown as well. Not everything is wrapped up in a happy ending.

The final lesson is accepting your own death. Self-death may be literal like the episodes 'Rebecca', 'James Garr', 'Angel' or 'Grave Mistake'. Or death can be metaphorical like Riley becoming new personas, Maya losing herself, or the death of love. The former episodes dealt with the concept of immortality and coming to terms with one's final moments. Fi investigates a girl claiming to be Rebecca's daughter in truth, she's Rebecca herself. Amazed at how much this immortal girl knows and has seen in her years, Rebecca refutes this saying that she hates her immortality. She can never marry, she had to leave Molly, her only friend, behind. Who wants to live forever? 'James Garr' is about the titular character undergo cryonic preservation as a cancer cure. The procedure's successful, but James Gar hasn't a soul anymore with this realization he gives his life to an elderly patient Jack met. In the subplot that elderly man dying of cancer beleives that whenever death comes for him he will greet death with willingness and bravery. James Garr realizing his hollow life switch places with the man so he can live a little longer. 'Grave Mistake' is about a family friend of the family who's been receiving death threats and runs to Annie and the Phillips for help. With Annie's guidance, the woman discovers her dead husband wrote "You're dead" so that she'd remember she died. It's rare that a children's show relays the message that death isn't ominous, it's part of life.

During an interview Cooksney admitted that if Disney had allowed them to, Fi would descend into Hell to rescue her father's soul.*2 Jack would have discovered his past life as a Celtic knight who begged that his next incarnation would be as Fi's older brother. Moreover, it explains that dragon's fear of Jack in 'Strangling' and aside from familial bonds, knight life explains his overprotection of him mom from a mermaid siren. ('Fathom') A tenet of the Order of the Good Death's death positivity is "I believe that my open, honest advocacy around death can make a difference, and can change culture." Cooksney probably didn't intend for SW to have so much death focus but it's applicable to the show.

'Yearbook', 'Triangle', and 'Ski Lodge' are examples of metaphorical death. Whenever Riley embraces different personas, she's undergoing an Ego Death in an attempt to discover her true self. She becomes a Goth Girl so her classmates visualize her shadow side. Contrary to her masquerade, Riley's shadow side isn't Goth but is a metaphor of her dark side coexisting with her light side. Maya lost herself during her dalliance with Lucas to understand her relationship identity contrasting he singular identity. Later on during the love triangle's conclusion, Riley's first comment is "This love triangle needs to die. Nature knows that it needs to die." Of all her friends Riley mentions death the most, examples are 'Yearbook', 'Gravity', and 'Pluto.' Continuing with this death theme involve the teenagers' fantasies as a metaphor for the death of their romance. During their respective daydreams, Riley and Maya inform each other that their dream romance isn't reality. In Dream Riley's fantasy she dies, in essence, the girls kill their ego and their romances to grow.

Childhood Acceptance

Transforming themselves from childhood trauma are Annie and Maya's ultimate goals within the series. Annie's panther and Maya's hope are key in reaching their transformations. For this essay portion, I'm using Widow's Walk', 'Pen Pal', and 'Annie's Song.' For Maya's episodes, I'll use are 'World of Terror 3', 'Forgiveness', and 'Goodbye.'

Symbolically the panther represents the death-rebirth cycle and confronting fears. According to Spirit Animal's website, those with the panther guide are blessed with powerful protectors. In addition, panthers indicate supernatural journeys with occult leanings. Therefore her character's introduction served a purpose in So Weird despite being unplanned. Finally as Annie's panther endows her with strength to confront any obstacle before her.

'Widow's Walk' acts as a transition between death acceptance into childhood acceptance. Tired of her age limiting her privileges Annie swaps ages with an elderly woman. Shocked by her transformation she finds a bottled message from the woman's husband. Desperate for her youth back Annie begs the woman to reverse their ages. Selfishly, the woman refuses due to her thinking that her husband's waiting for her at home not realizing he died in sea storm that turned the woman into a widow. Growing weaker daily Annie knows if she can't convince the woman of the truth she will die. When Annie feints in an attempt to reach the woman and true to its nature, Annie's panther appears at her side giving her strength to continue on. Obviously Annie's successful getting her age back. What's interesting are the contradictions between the elderly woman and Annie. Both characters fear death desperately clinging to life, but Annie's aware of death while the woman would rather delude herself of human mortality. At the climax the women's remorseful of her selfishness wishing she knew how to reverse her wish. Annie's regrets her wish understanding living in the present is better than living in living in the future.

Similarly 'World of Terror' along with 'Pen Pal' shows the girls' adolescence if their positive influences were absent in their lives. By befriending Jennifer and not meeting Riley, Annie and Maya become rebellious Goths. Maya no longer believes that she deserves good things; Annie pushes her friends away. Following this change, Alternate Annie's panther is a worthless tattoo, Alternate Maya begins bulling Riley for not letting her in her bedroom. . Deprived of hope or understanding our alternates protagonists cannot accept their pasts. Being Disney, these girls defeat their alternates. Annie through using her panther power, Maya through befriending Riley in the parallel universe.

These last three deal with Maya and Annie discovering the truth and making amends with their childhoods. In 'Forgiveness' Maya writes and letter to her father, Kermit, in an attempt to forgive him as part of Cory's homework assignment. That following day Kermit returns to town hoping what his daughter said in her letter was true. Unable to forgive Kermit, he leaves once more reducing Maya to tears. As a result Maya realizes she's forgiven herself for believing she had caused Kermit's departure. By forgiving herself, Maya's ability to accept her past and find a new father figure in Shawn Hunter when he adopts her in 'Goodbye.'

In the penultimate episode the characters travel to a Native American reservation as a break from touring. Unlike her friends Annie can't enjoy her day off with strange flashbacks coming to mind. Coyote possesses the tribe's leader when a little girl becomes lost in the forest, forcing Annie to remember her childhood memories. Years earlier the Thelon family visited a jungle for a research assignment, little Annie awakens before her parents do and wanders into the forests. She happens across a petrified tribal man and it's only when a poisonous snake attacks her she realizes the danger she's in. As her parents discover their daughter's disappeared, the man rushes her to his village in an attempt to save her life. With shaman magic, the man's father removes the venom and takes Annie to a location where her parents will find her. Grateful Annie sacrificed her life to save his son, the father promises to protect her all her life in the form of a panther. With full understanding of her childhood, Annie manages to accept her past as Maya did.

Conclusion

Girl Meets World and So Weird are different shows catering to wildly different audiences. Still, each character follows similar archetypes as well as themes people wouldn't expect of Disney Channel to allow on their network. More importantly, the fact that it does shows its capability to portray mature, darker subject matters for all audiences. Readers may disagree with my argument but these are shows the current generation should watch. Girl Meets World is a television show that my generation should watch. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my essay and I would love it if you gave me your opinions on each program, as well.

End Notes

*1 – Many Disney Channel actors starred in Law & Order: SVU episodes. Von Detten, Carpenter, and Kimberly Jean Brown as examples were in that Law & Order spinoff. Someone even wrote a crossover fanfic of GMW and SVU. If a fan theorist could invent a theory that Disney and any crime universe are connected I would be ecstatic.

*2 – Walt Disney has had hell landscape stories since the 1930s. Silly Symphonies' 'Goddess of Spring' had Satan-Hades drag Persephone to Hell. Fantasia ended with the song 'Night on Bald Mountain' where Demon Satan tortures souls only stopped when Holy light/God intervenes. Frollo damns Esmerelda to Hell if he can't possess her and little mentions God and Satan. (Hunchback of Notre Dame) CoCo takes place primarily in the afterlife. Disney Channel could've done a Hell episode.

Links

www . orderofthegooddeath resources / death-positive-movement

so-weird . proboards

Disney . wikia wiki / So_Weird

www . youtube user / OrderoftheGoodDeath (Ask A Mortician)

www . youtube user / littlemissfuneral (Little Miss Funeral)

www . youtube user / UnderTheKnifeShow (Under the Knife)

www . fanfiction s / 6178294 / 1/Love-As-True-As-Time

www . fanfiction s / 6067416/1 / An-Ultimate-Hey-Arnold-Essay

www . spiritanimal . info / panther-spirit-animal /

post / 125280313440 / so-weirdgirl-meets-world-parallels-these-are-my (SW & GMW)

#so weird #girl meets world #mine #fi phillips #annie thelen #alexz johnson #cara delizia #maya hart #sabrina carpenter #riley matthews #rowen blanchard #disney #disney channel #the disney channel #comment leave notes #reblog

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bnfbc · 4 years

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The Lost City of the Monkey God - by Douglas Preston - March 2020 - selected by Gabe

Andy: “This was an enjoyable read. Preston is an engaging writer who did a good job making you feel like you were in the jungles of Honduras. I could have done with some more history and background. I found the part about the Mayan king who had broken bones from the ball game to be fascinating. The part about Leish was interesting as well but didn't fully fit.” B+

Gabe: “Overall, I liked this book. I thought the author did a good job bringing in his excitement for the exploration without being too overbearing or inserting himself too much into the story. I also enjoyed learning about the Lidar process, and thinking about the question of whether to leave artifacts in the ground where they might be looted but could still be studied. My main beef is that the part about leishmaniasis felt unnecessary, but it was interesting nonetheless.” A-

Jachles: “It’s nice to read an entertaining book. I feel like they hyped up the White City and Monkey God legends a little too much, but whatever pays the LIDAR bills I guess. Between the crazy fixer guy and the hardcore British mercenary dudes, it was a great cast of characters. I’m assuming this will be made into a movie soon, so listen up all you casting directors...Nick Nolte as Bruce Heineke and Val Kilmer as one of the historical White City grifters...would be a virtual lock for multiple Golden Globes. I really enjoyed the unexpected left-turn that happened in the last section of the book where they explored tropical infectious diseases. I loved that it featured quotes from Dr. Fauci long before he was gracing donuts at Donuts Delite.” A-

Paul: “While it didn’t quite jibe with the romantic adventure images suggested by its cover and title, it actually did something much more interesting than just tell the story of some white dudes “discovering” an ancient civilization. In discussing the history, technology, politics, sociology, and immunology involved in the exploration, Preston painted a fairly complete picture of the state of modern archaeology and all of its far-reaching effects on the world. Bonus points for the dope pre-COVID Dr. Fauci appearance.” B+

Tommy: "This book gave me a new respect for just how sketchy the jungle is from a human safety perspective. If you can somehow avoid the venomous snakes and insects, there's still plenty of infectious bacteria and viruses to go around. It was fascinating to learn about all of the ethics surrounding archeological digs and the contentious relationships among archeologists. Who knew that there were so many rivalries? It's quite impressive to see what the experts can deduce about a society based on a few artifacts and eroded piles of earth. The book also benefited from some real life people, like the fixer and various mercenaries, that seem like they're straight out of a fiction novel. The last section felt like an odd divergence as Preston detailed his own infection, but I was sucked in and interested in the outcome. It's baffling to me that this guy would venture back into the jungle after his tribulations, but he has to outshine his brother somehow." B

GPA: 3.40

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harrisfoster · 5 years

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My Top Ten Games of 2018

Hi Friends! 2018 was a year that just got better and better. Except for the PAX Prime food poisoning. That was bad. Let’s review the year real quick:

January 1st - February 28th: I was working at a horrible game studio and was incredibly depressed.

March 1st - December 31st: I started working at Finji, doing work that actually matters and I am very happy

Okay now that we’ve got that out of the way, let’s talk about video games! I’ve heard a lot of folks say that 2018 was an “eh” year for games and I just don’t agree with that. Due to the sheer number of great games I’ve played this year, I had a hard time picking out and organizing my top 10. Reviewing my notes, I played a total of 26 of this year’s releases. Here are my favorites.

10. Sea of Thieves

I’m very happy this game made it onto the list. All things considered, Sea of Thieves brought me great joy this year. My friend Devon put it best, describing the game as sitting around a campfire with friends as you chat and drink beer. Sure, every once in a while you’ve got to get serious and address a giant megalodon or another ship full of players, but for the most part you’re just mindless dinking around a gorgeous seascape with your mates, goofing and gaffing from island to island.

9. Mahvel’s Spiderman

Spiderman 2 on the Gamecube was one of my favorite games growing up, so when Insomniac finally made another good Spiderman game nearly FIFTEEN YEARS LATER, you know I’d be there for it. I’m not much for superhero stories, but the swinging around the city is the funnest traversal I’ve ever experienced in an open world game. But like, it’s 2018. Peter Parker is a big enough shithead to dab. There wasn’t one dab in the game. What gives.

8. God of War

BOY.

7. Return of the Obra Dinn

There’s a spoiler moment when I was streaming Return of the Obra Dinn that made me alt tab and put it on this list. That’s all I’m going to say. It’s a fantastic piratey Ghost Trick and you should spend $20 on it you penny-pinching buttlicker.

6. Tetris Effect

This might be the most beautiful game I’ve ever played. The final sequence of journey mode had me, slack-jawed on my couch, being both the most relaxed and focused I’ve ever been in my life. My neighbors probably hate how loud I cranked this game on my surround sound system, but fuck ‘em. Tetris Effect regularly caused me to stop thinking, which for a guy with anxiety, is kinda a big deal. I hope Enhance never stops making video games. I will buy every single one of them.

5. Hitman 2

One of the best just got better. There’s not much to be said about Hitman 2, only that it improves in pretty much every way possible on the original. The new locations are complex as they are beautiful, the new stealth mechanics and alert notifications make you feel like you’re pulling off badass maneuvers in a way that the original never did, and for once I cared a little bit about the story? The modern Hitmans (Hitmen?) are games that I greatly admire and want to see more and more of. Buy this game.

4. Jackbox Party Pack 5

This is one of the tightest Party Packs in years. The return of You Don’t Know Jack, the social manipulation of Split the Room, the 2nd time playing Mad Verse City where you’re all on your toes, and most importantly, Patently Stupid. I think Patently Stupid is up there with Quiplash and TeeK.O. as some of Jackbox’s finest work. No other game has my friends rolling on the ground laughing as I’m pitching them the concept of a PISTOL to SHOOT CLOWNS. Gah. So good. Also, you’ll notice I didn’t mention Zeeple Dome. That’s because I never got around to it. Sorry.

3. Beat Saber

This is one of like... 3 VR games that I think are cool. Would I ever recommend someone buy a VR headset? Hell no. Would I recommend someone play Beat Saber? Hell yeah. This thing is going to be my ticket to fitness next year. Oh, and they added 2018’s bop of the year, POP//STARS.

2. Super Smash Bros Ultimate

This is pretty shocking. I picked up Ultimate seemingly on a whim, and proceeded unlocking all the characters while on a trip to Vancouver. Sitting next to Gabe and Felix, we drank beers, swore at each other, and had a grand ol’ time. And this is all coming from someone who has never been a big Smash guy. The first one I bought was Brawl on the Wii, and it was mostly due to the fact that it was the easiest way to exploit the console at the time (sshh..). With my Smash come-up taking place on that version, I mained Snake - and when I found he wasn’t in the WiiU iteration of the game, coupled with the fact that my roommate unlocked all of the characters while I was on vacation, I fell back out of the series. Ultimate brought back Snake, made hits feel a lot harder, and fits in my backpack.

1. Dead Cells

Dead Cells is the most video-gamey-ass-video-game I played all year. Many games have attempted run-based, souls-like combat in RNG dungeons before, but Dead Cells is the first one to really nail it. I spent many hours on this game, and I only ever unlocked one of the many traversal upgrades, only about half of the weapons, and only ever made it to the final boss once, but damn did I have fun the entire time. There was seldom a death where I felt cheated, a feeling I believe to be common (and biggest detriment) of the roguelike genre. Every year I try to get my Souls fix. This year, it was Dead Cells.

Thanks for reading! I’ve got a few honorable mentions too, but that’s probably a separate article. Anyway, here’s to 2019!

#blog #me #me blog #goty #goty2018

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rocknrollbodhisattva · 5 years

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So Weird & Girl Meets World Crossover Essay

Introduction

From 1999 to 2001, Zoog Disney aired a paranormal show named So Weird, the Disney version of the X-Files. Micheal Jacobs revived Boy Meets World with a continuation called Girl Meets World. On the surface So Weird and Girl Meets World have nothing in common. The former show filmed in Canada, the latter was filmed in California. Cooksney and Jacobs couldn’t be more different, Jacobs is known for comedic sitcoms like My Two Dads, John Astole and producer Jon Cooksney, focused on speculative fiction. Astole worked on Stargate, and the 1980s Twilight Zone revivals. Disney Channel hosting their television shows is their only commonalities so far. What made these programs successful was pushing Disney’s Astole limits on what considered acceptable. As a result, So Weird was the darkest show Disney Channel aired where Girl Meets World was one of the smarter television shows of modern Disney Channel. Audiences don’t think of Disney tackling death acceptance, religion, or feminism.

Fiona “Fi” Philips (Cara DeLizia) along with her older brother Jack, join their mother Molly Phillips (Makenzie (Phillips) on her comeback tour. Having a Rockstar mom isn’t easy, especially when evil spirits begin stalking Fiona. When Annie (Alexz Johnson) arrives a paranormal panther follows suit. Riley Matthews (Rowen Blanchard) along with her best friend Maya Hart (Sabrina Carpenter) continue the lessons her father learned almost Boy Meets World. At six years old I loved stories about hauntings and dark creatures, so, So Weird naturally appealed to me. Nostalgia over Boy Meets World influenced my decision to watch its sequel and the quality of it surprised me. This cross-over essay’s purpose is dissecting these shows popularity and their similarities rather than their differences.

Surface Similarities & Differences

At the surface level SW and GMW’s similarities are minor., Fi Phillips and Riley Matthews are our brunette primary protagonists; Annie Thelon and Maya Hart are our blonde secondary protagonists. Fandoms hated Annie and Riley because they interfered with the fandoms’ favorites then subsequently blamed for the lackluster third seasons. Celebrities Carpenter and Johnzon used their shows as advertisement for their music careers. Actually Disney gave Carpenter a record deal before casting her as Maya. Carpenter is talented but still sounds like a Disney pop star, however, Johnson has more experience. SW had better music because there was a larger variety of genres like Rock, Pop, Blues, and Celtic music. SW alluded to Celtic and Greek mythology like changelings and sirens. GMW alluded to BMW and nothing else like Cory and Shawn’s jellybean scene. Both shows had actors who appeared in crime shows including Carpenter and Eric von Detten.*1

What else SW and GMW had in common was that they had realistic friendships and family dynamics. Friendships weren’t used as problem solving devises but to deepen the characters. Jack (Patrick Lewis) and Clu (Eric von Detten) hung out because they wanted to not because the plot required them to. Parents were written as people. Molly struggled with widowhood and had goals outside of being a mother. Irene felt inferior to her younger sister and Ned Bell was a biker before he married Irene. In addition, Cory taught History yet offered fatherly advice to his daughter and her friends. Single mother, Katy, struggled with her part-time job and caring for Maya. As siblings, Jack/Fi and Riley/Auggie neither fought constantly nor always got along. ‘Singularity’ Jack and Fi do nothing but argue but in ‘Medium’ Jack uses “colourful language” when a psychic angers Fi. In GMW, Riley and Auggie argued in ‘Forgiveness’ then have a touching moment in ‘Christmas Maya.’ When writing only children Jacobs and Astole never relied on only child stereotypes instead showing the complexity of being one. Not to mention, as an only child myself, I loved this. Maya and Annie weren’t spoiled were confused over siblings concepts, like sharing. Trapped in endless detention, Annie’s confused by Jack standoffishness finding out that he falsely believes that Annie’s replacing his sister. After assuring him that was never her intention, she and Jack become friends. Likewise, Maya confuses Rucas’ (Riley/ Lucas) relationship with that of a brother-sister one because she doesn’t understand how siblings act. Siblings are loving and friendly but also bicker like Lucaya (Maya/Lucas). Eventually they develop sibling dynamics with other characters, Annie/Jack and Maya/Lucas.

Neither show’s focus was on romance. SW focused on family while GMW focused on friendship and love interests didn’t appear in more than one episode. Jack’s girlfriend, Gabe, appeared in ‘Angel.’ Ryan was Fi’s first kiss in ‘Second Generation’ and GMW had two date episodes. ‘Brother’ was about Cory and Topanga’s date night; ‘First Date’ was about Lucas and Riley first kiss. If romance wasn’t plot important then why did GMW develop a shipping war while SW was immune to such disputes? In comparison to GMW, SW had limited couple options meaning there weren’t many options before couples became slash or incestuous Those options are: Annie and Fi with either Clu or Carrey. GMW avoids this pitfall with a diverse amount of characters but started shipping wars by introducing the leads and love interest simultaneously. Fanon favourites were Jack/Annie, Carrey/Molly, Lucas/Maya despite the intended couples are Cory/Topanga, Riley/Lucas, and Fi/Clu.

Why did Anti-Annie fans hate her less than Anti-Riley fans? Again, the fandom hated Riley more because of differences in character casting. If a Jerkass character is among the main cast the fandom automatically absolves them, giving their retribution to the kinder characters. Maya’s the “broken bird” so fans will prefer her and discount Riley giving fans reason to pair Maya in a love-hate romance. For extra information on this, TvTropes offers an analysis using Nickelodeon television as examples. SW main characters aren’t jerkasses toward their friends meaning Annie gets less hate and Friend-Lovers are on equal levels with Love-Hate ones.

Seekers: Fiona & Riley

Seekers of the 12 Archetypes are constantly searching for expanded knowledge of the world at large or themselves. Riley and Fi want to understand other people’s perspectives in a worldly sense (Riley) and supernaturally (Fi). However both are open-minded toward unproven phenomenon as opposed to our blond protagonists who rather “go with the flow.” Also as the primary protagonists they possess the most contradictions of their worlds. Fi’s an amateur parapsychologist but wants a normal life to protect her family. (‘Lightening Rod’) Fi is a computer geek struggling academically but loves learning new subjects (‘Tulpa’, ‘Escape’, ‘Vampire’). In comparison, Riley succeeds with her schoolwork but is naïve to the world around her. (‘Pluto’) She insecure often becoming victim to peer pressure but craves uniqueness away from her peers (‘Popular’, ‘Jexica’) Riley and Annie love feminine hobbies – makeup and shopping – but love masculine pursuits too. Both of them love the outdoors, athletics, but are terrible at sports. (‘Ski Lodge’ in GMW and ‘Sacrifice’ in SW) Riley can’t make the cheerleading team but loves basketball; Fi fails at baseball but tries appreciates the sport. (‘Singularity’, ‘Rah Rah’) Contradictions make them rounded characters but causes internal conflict when they attempt to form a stable Ego.

Upon waking up in the middle of the night, Riley eavesdrops on her parents where she doubts if she’s good enough compared to her parents. After all Topanga is a successful lawyer, Cory is a successful teacher, and have a perfect fairytale love. (‘Cory & Topanga’) Unable to connect with her father, Rick, Fi seeks resemblances between herself and him. Just like Riley’s atelphobia, Fi feels disconnected from her family because of her paranormal interests. An example is ‘Strange Geometry’ where Fi feels betrayed that her mother kept Rick obsession a secret. Since Lucas doesn’t differentiate between Riley and Maya during the love triangle, Riley further doubts her worth as a girlfriend. In the pilot and a deleted ‘Upstate’ scene, Riley molds herself into Maya so she’ll have an identity. Constant identity searching is another aspect of the Seeker archetype.

Caretaking drives our protagonists to seek out the world’s answers. Fi wants closure with her father yet her investigations aren’t just for her benefit, but for the benefits of her loved ones. Molly’s friends Rebecca left when she was Fi’s age, thus Fi confronts Rebecca’s “daughter” so Molly will have some closure of her own. Reluctantly, Fi leads the two of them to Rebecca’s house where history repeated itself again; Rebecca’s family disappeared again leaving Molly more betrayed and confused. ‘In Forgiveness’ Riley backtalks to Kermit wanting answers as to why he left her best friend when she was younger. Town members become annoyed by Fi when she forces them to remember the alien invasion the day before. (‘Memory’) Fi helps a coma girl’s mother and grandmother with technology to revive the girl from her coma even though these people are strangers to her. (‘Lost’) Riley invades her friends’ boundaries so Maya will have hope (‘Master Plan’), tries jumping into a bull pen to save Lucas (‘Texas’), and keeps her friends in a stairwell so they’ll reflect on their surroundings (‘High School’). Fi challenges Bricriu to hangman so he’ll stop possessing her brother. (‘Will-o-Wisp’) Riley gives up her relationship with Shawn, her godfather, so Maya will have a father. She forgets her affections for Lucas so Maya will have a chance at love. (‘Texas’, ‘New Years’) Occasionally their actions cause annoyance among their friends but its for the greater good. Sacrificing one’s own desires is the key component in the Caretaker’s goal.

Creators: Annie & Maya

Creators turn illusion into reality and similar to Seekers, Creators are invested self-identity and possibilities. When we’re introduced to Annie and Maya both are immediately drawn to creative fields. By the ending of ‘Lightening Rod’, Annie confides in Fi that she’s always had an eerie connection to music and find inspiration from something as insignificant as a stick. Furthermore, Mr and Mrs Thelon inform Molly that Annie has the ability to master most any instrument. ‘In the Darkness’, the theme song, shows Annie playing as well as popular instruments like the guitar. Maya gained that same artistic guidance from the stars or a paint war. (‘Meets Boy’, ‘Upstate’, ‘Maya’s Mother’). Partly due to Carpenter portrays her, Maya masters singing and guitar quite easily. (‘1961’, ’Creativity’) An added bonus to Annie’s is that they act as retrocognition from her past.

Both blondes quickly give up old lifestyles for chances at an art or singing career. For example, Annie’s ecstatic she’ll join Molly’s band on tour, granted her parents reason this is so Annie will have a normal and balanced life. (‘Lightening Rod’) Impulsive, Future Maya leaps at the opportunity when she receives a SoHo gallery internship. (‘Bay Window’) Creators share the fear of not having an identity. When a recording agent steals Annie’s voice and likewise when the art teacher grades Maya’s painting as incomplete, the girls doubt their self-worth. In ‘Carnival’ Annie’s reflections mock her abilities when she rescues her friends from an evil ringmaster. Season one Maya wonders if Riley was right and Maya’s troubled past is responsible for her artistic ability. What’s more is that the Creator archetype gives the character a dangerous duality; either they’re practical with their art or they drown themselves in their disillusion. Which is why the Orphan archetype lurks beneath the Creator.

The Thelons and Hart families are alive but their actions produce an orphan effect on their daughters. Traveling across the globe before the So Weird events prohibited establishing permanent roots somewhere. Kermit’s physical abandonment compounded with Katy’s emotional abandonment ensured that Maya wouldn’t have a support system. Although being an only child isn’t problematic, not having someone to depend on made connecting with others difficult. Neither would form a real connection until they made surrogate families out of the Phillips and Matthews families. Its not surprising their friends would find them selfish at times.

Death Acceptance

The major difference between Cooksney and Jacobs is Cooskney never intended lessons for So Weird whereas Jacobs’ moralizing hindered character development on Girl Meets World. Jacobs’s lesson was the vague statement, “People Change People” I’d argue his actual moral is not taking people for instead. Cooksney’s moral, if you could consider it one, was sacrifice. Fi gets lost camping and sacrifices immediate help to save Big Foot. (‘Sacrifice’) Barring those morals, the writers over-arcing themes of both were acceptance. SW’s primary theme was death acceptance for the Phillips and Matthews family with the minor theme of childhood acceptance Annie) and Maya. All stories lead back to sex and death, Disney’s not going to discuss sexuality, but death resounds through every film since Disney’s inception. Also no SW or GMW character was exempt from death confrontation. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross’s Five Stages of Grief: Anger, Sadness, Denial, Bargaining, and Acceptance aren’t linear and one may never gain acceptance. All the characters are stuck in one of the stages and only Fi gains acceptance.

Earnest Becker’s seven reasons why people fear death are as followed:

Fear of pain

Fear of not knowing what becomes of our bodies

How our dependents will manage after our death

How our loved ones will cope emotionally after our death

Fear of an afterlife, such as eternal oblivion, or Heaven/Hell

Fear of dying with an unlived life

Fear of dying with uncompleted projects

Thantophobia is why humans behave the way they do. Rick’s untimely death when Fi was three-years-old affected her because she has no memories of her father. She often resented her brother and mother because they knew him and she did not. Rick/Fi’s shared fear is emotionally coping of his death. Maya struggled with coping with the metaphorical death of her father, possibly thinking he’s dead to her. Kermit intentionally abandoned his family, whereas Rick intended on returning to his family, but he didn’t plan on evil spirits murdering him. Fi and Maya are stuck in the anger phase of grieving. When her grandfather is visited by a banshee, Fi tracks the creature down and asks Death personified the fairness in taking her father away from her. Death responds that it will even the imbalance by extending her grandfather’s life for a time. But for seasons 1 and 2 Fi copes with death by actively seeking the paranormal afterlife to escape and accept death.

Jack’s death phobia is similar to Fi’s except he fears losing his sister and mother like he lost his father; his nightmare is a manifestation of that fear. In the midst of gang’s lucid dream, Jack leaves them for a method to awaken from the dream but is transported to the night of Rick’s. Dream Rick promises he’ll return, but knowing the future Jack chases after his father. Fear trapped Jack in Grief’s denial stage subsequently causing his resentment of the paranormal his dad loved so much. And it’s not until ‘Changeling’ when Jack accepts his dad’s death when he starts singing again. Surprised, Clu comments that Jack hadn’t sung since Rick died. Jack responds with, “Well, maybe it's time I started again.”

Minor episodes such as ‘Fall’ (SW) and ‘Gravity’ (GMW) discuss death on a smaller scale. ‘Fall’ details Ned and his childhood friend, Sam, on the death anniversary of their other friend’s drowning. Haunted by the memory, Sam is literally haunted by Pete’s ghost leading to Pete’s recent. The men’s responses to death are vastly different; Ned would rather forget Pete’s death and Sam tries to confront it. Both are part of the grieving sequence but overall, ‘Fall’ discuses the myriad of complex emotions after death. Childhood deaths are rightly considered “Bad Deaths” whether or not loved ones are complicit with the death, we often feel that we could’ve prevented it. Sam is stuck in the bargaining and grieving stages before he can move on. As the men relive that fateful day admits he was scared of dying and can finally accept death now. In ‘Gravity’ the teens are crushed when a beloved bakery owner dies leaving the bakery to Topanga. The episode ends with Auggie opening his gift with a note reading "It's not My-Kranian bakery, I'm dead." Cory phones Mr.Feeney telling him that he is glad Feeney isn’t dead, perhaps this was an allusion to ‘I Dream of Feeney’ when Cory wished him ill. Riley gives the eulogy and everyone learns to cherish their loved ones while they’re alive.

Next is Molly and her death phobia in the series. Molly’s emotions toward her husband are erratic in all three seasons. It’s been over a decade since Rick’s death and she still hasn’t accepted it. In the Christmas episode ‘Fountain’ Molly admits to a young Fi that her loss bothers her. In ‘Medium’ Molly began to resent Rick’s memory because she felt haunted by him wishing that she could forget him. Molly misses being a lover but is guilt-ridden because she feels like she is betraying her husband. (‘Fathom’) And in season 3’s ‘Muse,’ Molly and the band travel to the town of their first concert to recapture the inspiration she felt there. Molly never gains acceptance over death and I loved that this option was shown as well. Not everything is wrapped up in a happy ending.

The final lesson is accepting your own death. Self-death may be literal like the episodes ‘Rebecca’, ‘James Garr’, ‘Angel’ or ‘Grave Mistake’. Or death can be metaphorical like Riley becoming new personas, Maya losing herself, or the death of love. The former episodes dealt with the concept of immortality and coming to terms with one’s final moments. Fi investigates a girl claiming to be Rebecca’s daughter in truth, she’s Rebecca herself. Amazed at how much this immortal girl knows and has seen in her years, Rebecca refutes this saying that she hates her immortality. She can never marry, she had to leave Molly, her only friend, behind. Who wants to live forever? ‘James Garr’ is about the titular character undergo cryonic preservation as a cancer cure. The procedure’s successful, but James Gar hasn’t a soul anymore with this realization he gives his life to an elderly patient Jack met. In the subplot that elderly man dying of cancer beleives that whenever death comes for him he will greet death with willingness and bravery. James Garr realizing his hollow life switch places with the man so he can live a little longer. ‘Grave Mistake’ is about a family friend of the family who’s been receiving death threats and runs to Annie and the Phillips for help. With Annie’s guidance, the woman discovers her dead husband wrote “You’re dead” so that she’d remember she died. It’s rare that a children’s show relays the message that death isn’t ominous, it’s part of life.

During an interview Cooksney admitted that if Disney had allowed them to, Fi would descend into Hell to rescue her father’s soul.*2 Jack would have discovered his past life as a Celtic knight who begged that his next incarnation would be as Fi’s older brother. Moreover, it explains that dragon’s fear of Jack in ‘Strangling’ and aside from familial bonds, knight life explains his overprotection of him mom from a mermaid siren. (‘Fathom’) A tenet of the Order of the Good Death’s death positivity is “I believe that my open, honest advocacy around death can make a difference, and can change culture.” Cooksney probably didn’t intend for SW to have so much death focus but it’s applicable to the show.

‘Yearbook’, ‘Triangle’, and ‘Ski Lodge’ are examples of metaphorical death. Whenever Riley embraces different personas, she’s undergoing an Ego Death in an attempt to discover her true self. She becomes a Goth Girl so her classmates visualize her shadow side. Contrary to her masquerade, Riley’s shadow side isn’t Goth but is a metaphor of her dark side coexisting with her light side. Maya lost herself during her dalliance with Lucas to understand her relationship identity contrasting he singular identity. Later on during the love triangle’s conclusion, Riley’s first comment is “This love triangle needs to die. Nature knows that it needs to die.” Of all her friends Riley mentions death the most, examples are ‘Yearbook’, ‘Gravity’, and ‘Pluto.’ Continuing with this death theme involve the teenagers’ fantasies as a metaphor for the death of their romance. During their respective daydreams, Riley and Maya inform each other that their dream romance isn’t reality. In Dream Riley’s fantasy she dies, in essence the girls kill their ego and their romances to grow.

Childhood Acceptance

Transforming themselves from childhood trauma are Annie and Maya’s ultimate goals within the series. Annie’s panther and Maya’s hope are key in reaching their transformations. For this essay portion I’m using Widow’s Walk’, ‘Pen Pal’, and ‘Annie’s Song.’ For Maya’s episodes I’ll use are ‘World of Terror 3’, ‘Forgiveness’, and ‘Goodbye.’

Symbolically the panther represents the death-rebirth cycle and confronting fears. According to Spirit Animal’s website, those with the panther guide are blessed with powerful protectors. In addition, panthers indicate supernatural journeys with occult leanings. Therefore her character’s introduction served a purpose in So Weird despite being unplanned. Finally as Annie’s panther endows her with strength to confront any obstacle before her.

‘Widow’s Walk’ acts as a transition between death acceptance into childhood acceptance. Tired of her age limiting her privileges Annie swaps ages with an elderly woman. Shocked by her transformation she finds a bottled message from the woman’s husband. Desperate for her youth back Annie begs the woman to reverse their ages. Selfishly, the woman refuses due to her thinking that her husband’s waiting for her at home not realizing he died in sea storm that turned the woman into a widow. Growing weaker daily Annie knows if she can’t convince the woman of the truth she will die. When Annie feints in an attempt to reach the woman and true to its nature, Annie’s panther appears at her side giving her strength to continue on. Obviously Annie’s successful getting her age back. What’s interesting are the contradictions between the elderly woman and Annie. Both characters fear death desperately clinging to life, but Annie’s aware of death while the woman would rather delude herself of human mortality. At the climax the women’s remorseful of her selfishness wishing she knew how to reverse her wish. Annie’s regrets her wish understanding living in the present is better than living in living in the future.

Similarly ‘World of Terror’ along with ‘Pen Pal’ shows the girls’ adolescence if their positive influences were absent in their lives. By befriending Jennifer and not meeting Riley, Annie and Maya become rebellious Goths. Maya no longer believes that she deserves good things; Annie pushes her friends away. Following this change, Alternate Annie’s panther is a worthless tattoo, Alternate Maya begins bulling Riley for not letting her in her bedroom. . Deprived of hope or understanding our alternates protagonists cannot accept their pasts. Being Disney, these girls defeat their alternates. Annie through using her panther power, Maya through befriending Riley in the parallel universe.

These last three deal with Maya and Annie discovering the truth and making amends with their childhoods, finally able to put the past behind them and move on. In ‘Forgiveness’ Maya writes and letter to her father, Kermit, in an attempt to forgive him as part of Cory’s homework assignment. That following day Kermit returns to town hoping what his daughter said in her letter was true. Unable to forgive Kermit, he leaves once more reducing Maya to tears. As a result Maya realizes she’s forgiven herself for believing she caused Kermit’s departure. By forgiving herself, Maya’s ablity to accept her past and her new father figure in Shawn Hunter when he adopts her in ‘Goodbye.’

In the penultimate episode the characters travel to a Native American reservation as a break from touring. Unlike her friends Annie can’t enjoy her day off with strange flashbacks coming to mind. Coyote possesses the tribe’s leader when a little girl becomes lost in the forest, forcing Annie to remember her childhood memories. Years earlier the Thelon family visited a jungle for a research assignment, little Annie awakens before her parents do and wanders into the forests. She happens across a petrified tribal man and it’s only when a poisonous snake attacks her she realizes the danger she’s in. As her parents discover their daughter’s disappeared, the man rushes her to his village in an attempt to save her life. With shaman magic, the man’s father removes the venom and takes Annie to a location where her parents will find her. Grateful Annie sacrificed her life to save his son, the father promises to protect her all her life in the form of a panther. With full understanding of her childhood, Annie manages to accept her past as Maya did.

Conclusion

Girl Meets World and So Weird are different shows catering to wildly different audiences. Still, each character follows similar archetypes as well as themes people wouldn’t expect of Disney Channel to allow on their network. More importantly, the fact that it does shows its capability to portray mature, darker subject matters for all audiences. Readers may disagree with my argument but these are shows the current generation should watch. Girl Meets World is a television show that my generation should watch. Anyway, I hope you enjoyed my essay and I would love it if you gave me your opinions on each program, as well.

#so weird #girl meets world #fi phillips #fiona phillips #annie thelon #riley matthews defense #riley matthews #maya hart #rilaya #mine #boy meets world

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