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your-fave-jewish-magical-girl · 8 months

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EPISODE 61 SPOILERS BSD Anti-Delulu theory post: Why [REDACTED CHARACTER] dying from [REDACTED EVENT] would probably be a good thing.

This is reposted from Reddit. So Episode 61 just came out which luckily ties up a lot of the cliffhangers from the manga and serves as an ending point to the vampire infection arc--which is making me party on the inside because holy shit has that been going on for awhile. But now we have more cliffhangers. The last two minutes teasing a new arc, Sigma's fate, whether or not the armed detective agency are still criminals and ambiguous character fates. Oh yeah, and one of the main villains for the past 3 seasons might be dead.

I've seen people saying that he's not dead, and if he is, he shouldn't be dead. But I would like to propose a second opinion.

I feel like it is likely that Fyodor is dead from the helicopter crash. And that seems like a pretty good way to end this arc. It puts an end to the 'I outsmarted your outsmarting' stuff that's been going on for over a year at this point in the prison and it proves to Fyodor from his insulting of Dazai and Chuuya's relationship previously that their bond was NOT superficial. The thing that he ultimately doubted was what killed him and It's such wonderful irony. It also ties back to his biggest flaw, how he didn't trust the people he couldn't use and how just being a super smart 100000 iq guy doesn't matter in the face of sheer arrogance, which Mori commented on all the way back in season one. His overconfidence and lack of regard for other people stabbed him in the back, which serves as a great contrast to Dazai even brought up by Sigma. Dazai does not use the armed detective agency, he is a part of it, and his trust in the agency and in his friends was what kept him alive. But Fyodor can't do that, we don't know much about him, but from what we've seen, he doesn't really value the people in his life, he didn't value Chuuya, not Nikolai, Sigma, not his subordinates in the Rats in the House of the Dead. And that being the thing that kills him is great.

**Please do not take this to mean I don't want to see more of Fyodor or that we SHOULDN'T have more**

I do genuinely think that we need to know his power and his motivations as a character, not to mention. This episode they teased a certain man that Dazai lives up to that we don't know about. So how can you develop on that if he's dead?

Well from a story perspective, I hope he doesn't survive the helicopter crash. That would be such a cheap ending to something that was built up so well, pretty much nulling any impact for the finale, twin darkness, and Nikolai's character. But what I think will happen is that Fyodor is going to live on. Someone smarter than me mentioned this, but the words he says when he dies were the last words Jesus said before he came back three days later. That is obvious foreshadowing if I've ever seen that.

But keep in mind, Jesus died on the cross. There was no fake out.

So while I do believe Fyodor died in that crash, he is coming back in some way. There are theories that he might live on through Sigma which I find to be an interesting concept, helping us understand his backstory. And I think that him serving as an antagonist beyond the grave through memories, mind games, and manipulation would be such a Fyodor thing to do. If he does get revived, I wouldn't want it to be a respawn basically. Living on through the book, his orders, subordinates would honestly be a great way of preserving him and moving the story forward passed the whole "Dazai and Fyodor do mind game death note stuff" thing that he's been basically reduced to, liberating his character and moving forward in the story to this next arc. I don't know exactly how it would be done, but there are ways to kill him in that helicopter that don't involve throwing out his entire character, past and ability. From what we’ve seen, Asagiri seems very capable of writing a workaround to that. And knowing him, he probably has at least something figured out.

As for the body, Fyodor making a fake arm in theory sounds smart, but there is just too much bullshit involved. He wasn't injured when he came in right? how could he predict all the damage done to his arm with the bandages wrapped exactly as they were when they got on? How would he survive the copter in the first place, didn't look like he was escaping when the entire screen consumed his being? How would there be enough TIME to make a fake arm. I don't care how smart you think this guy is, that stuff takes time to make, and there was like what, 30 minutes overall inside that prison? No matter what way you slice it, you need to make at least someone in that scenario Mary Sue levels of big brained to pull that off and that's not really the kind of writing Asagiri does. Not to mention, it's a total copout.

As for the lack of body, yeah we didn't see it, but he also got blown up in a dang explosion, for all we know, the arm was the only thing that was left after he got blown to smithereens. And it didn't seem like Nikolai teleported to save him since he didn't really move, so what would that be? He has Kenji's powers now?? And even if somehow he DID survive all of that, also, even if he did survive, Fyodor doesn’t have the antidote, Dazai does. And we only have one antidote. So even in the best case scenario, Dazai would be thrown under the bus and there’s no way in hell dazai is dying yet, even more than Fyodor. All of those theories are even bigger plot holes and oversights than if he actually died.

So what does all of this mean, well Fyodor is almost probably dead (check his wiki). But that doesn't mean that his character and arc are over. He'll get immortalized somehow in a way that serves the oncoming arc without cheapening the finale for the prison arc, Dazai and Chuuya's relationship, and the absolute horror Nikolai was experiencing at the death of his friend. Yes it was painful, but if it turned out Fyodor was actually alive the entire time, that moment will have gone to waste.

Basically, anything can happen, but if I see Fyodor crawling out of that broken helicopter, I'm throwing hands.

#bungou stray dogs #bungo stray dogs #bsd #fyodor dostoevsky #fyodor bsd #bsd season 5 #bsd season 5 episode 11 #bsd theory #bungo stray dogs theory #anti-delulu #I could totally make a follow up to this #keep in mind that Fyodor does not have the same plot immunity as Dazai #anyways I love this season finale #sigma please be ok

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raycatz · 27 days

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I'm not including a situation where someone might be injured because in that case I'm thinking the bed goes to them by default or they are nominated for it. anyone who wants to be chatty goes to join the living room floor gang.

What are your thoughts and headcanons? Do you have thoughts on how the boys tend to approach assigning beds in inns? Who do the chain choose to sleep near when camping and why? What are their dynamics like when settling down for the night and getting ready for the day?

In "Mirror Vs Open Closet Door: Fight!" by Gintrinsic (here) Four refers to the chain's decision on how to split up between inn rooms as the "Link-per-room ratio" which I find very funny. He, Sky, and Time also talk about their thought process behind why they do or don't want to sleep in a room with some of the others which I find fun and interesting.

So! If you have thoughts and want to share them! *gestures to the post!*

#linked universe #linkeduniverse #alrighty! now for my answers-#for the ranch question I think it varies which is why I'm asking in a poll. What do you think happens most often though?#each answer is a fun scenario so it's difficult to choose #but I think they'd try to act politely around Malon and Time for the first couple visits with straws or rock paper scissors #or showing generosity by offering the bed to someone else. (I bet Malon saying they're charming is quite the incentive #for more possible compliments. The chain as a whole would want to prove her right xD )#Once they're more comfortable in the house though I can totally see Wind and Legend making a mad dash for it while Wars yells after them xD #Wind probably ends up sharing with Four a lot since they're the littles #or Wind snuggles in with Wars Legend Wild etc #Wild and Twi/Wolfie have claimed the spot on the floor by the fireplace.#For inn rooms / castle rooms / camping - I tend to group them by how they're grouped a lot already #but a lil mixed up #Time - Sky - Wars are the good rest trio. they want a good night's rest please let them get their beauty sleep. often joined by Four #Wars goes between this group and wherever Legend is depending on how chatty he is that night.#Twi - Wild - Hyrule are snuggle/proximity buddies #Legend is attached to Hyrule's hip or sets up near Warriors to gossip and gripe. I can also see him setting up near Wild #in the eye of the storm as it were or just an interesting place to be. Wild and Hyrule can get to chatting about everything and anything #so if Legend wants background noise (Hyrule and Wild podcast omg)-#or a conversation he can be half a part of and jump in and out of while getting ready for the night or in the mornings-#this is a good place to be. add Wind and things get a bit more chaotic.#Wind gravitates to Wars and Legend too when curious and chatty. He gravitates towards Time when he wants something calmer.#Four tends to be near Sky or Twi or to Legend's group for the same reasons #I can see Four and Twi having a little book club going during downtimes where they talk about what they're reading. Sky likes to listen. <3 #Wind thinks they're nerds but so is he and he can't resist a good story so he orbits and sometimes settles in and peppers questions.#it's funny that Time Sky and Wars want to sleep the most but Legend follows Wars to chat (and ends up bringing people with him xD )#there could be some conflict there oooo #Twi is by Time #it's almost a circle but with clusters of sleeping bags near on top of each other and filling the gaps

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mae-dwrites · 4 months

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Tom and Jack are brothers - mainly DPxMLB (can be DPxDCxMLB)

It was clear from the moment Jack was born that he was Gina’s son, no one could doubt that overzealous nature, and while Tom didn't have the same level of entustatsum as his mother and brother it didn't mean he wasn't an excitable person either. Truly Roland had no idea how he didn't die living with them, the man didn't realize how much he was like them nor really saw how much Jack would go on to be like him in some ways.

One thing was for certain the boys loved their parents, the Fenton luck and sanguine as well as the Dupain passion and vigor were ever-present in the household growing up. Gina loved her boys very much, they were the only reason she stuck in one place for so long. However, she was able to convince Roland to take them all over the U.S. and Europe.

Jack went on to have a passion for inventing and ghosts, both of which Roland looked down upon but Gina was his biggest supporter followed by Tom. Tom ended up enjoying baking with his father. (Jack tended to forget a meal or two when he got too into his work. So it worked out.)

Jack would move out (taking his mother’s maiden name) and go to college in Wisconsin and meet Vlad and Maddie and fall in love and all that! Tom though opens a bakery a few years of baking for some personal events and such, and meets Sabine who moved to Paris to go to school, they fall in love and she takes business courses to help better run the bakery. Roland does his…thing and he never approved of Jack’s hobbies either, “that's not what job a family man takes on” or something, he of course doesn't try to contact him. He gets to be a grumpy old man in (guilty) peace.

Tom and Jack have never missed anything, they're best friends and each other’s biggest supporters. Best man, holiday’s, etc. So of course they make sure their kids have plenty of meetings despite being an ocean away. They couldn't have been happier that their kids were so close in age, which meant they wouldn't struggle to connect.

It was quick to be seen none of the kids showed signs of the Dupain shape, oh well maybe they’d still get the strength? Or perhaps the Fenton luck would just be much stronger. To say where the kids got their size from was an understatement, and to say very amusing to their wives and mother.

Marinette loved her cousins and didn't like how it was only every so often she got to see them. And her aunt and uncle were very cool, and reminded her of Nonna Gina. It was fun to see Uncle Jack lift her papa up, he was the only person she’d ever seen who could pick up her papa.

Jazz and Danny loved the Dupain-Chengs, they seemed to help level their parents out and they actually set aside their ghost obsession to just be a family. Not to mention they made the best food, going to their home was the best, you never got attacked by the food!

Jazz, Marinette, and Danny were as thick as thieves as their dads were, they were a unit. Which meant Marinette had called Jazz and Danny after she had taken the earrings off, and Danny had called Marinette to tell her about how he was dealing with his powers after dying.

And the next time the Fenton’s came to the Dupain-Cheng’s maybe Marinette and Danny hugged a little longer and a little tighter than usual, and Jazz spent her time glued to the younger girl’s side.

#jack and tom are brothers #danny and jazz are practically marinette’s siblings #dp x mlb #this could totally also be a dp x dc x mlb #danny and marinette totally comforted each other through their bb #blond bullies #jazz tries to help Marinette through her crush ptsd. especially after socquline goes and can't be there for her #jazz definitely went and threatened chloé and kim after that. NO ONE hurts her baby cousin #that's why chloé wasn't so hands on the next year of school. she was scared of it getting back to jazz #in my head it’s marinette was born between jazz and danny #which means danny dies the year following ladybug becoming a thing #i haven't seen a single jack and tom being related and that is a crime. like ITS RIGHT THERE PEOPLE!!!#gina dupain’s madian name is fenton #like the similarities between the dupain’s and the fenton’s make my brain go brrrrr #blue eyed dark haired child who ends up being a hero because it’s needed and have parents that don't really pay attention to them so #it makes it easier to be a hero and has a very clear crush and has an older but close-in-age figure who will kick ass for them #also danny and marinette like getting the greatest responsibilities in the universe (if you ghostking danny route)#also let all three of these scrawny kids the dupain strength!!#it would be so funny #dp x mlb prompt #dp x mlb crossover

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glittter-skeleton · 26 days

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Hello OUAT fandom, I bring you Emma’s emotional cheating in s4

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kyouka-supremacy · 1 year

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WAIT YOU AREN'T AMERICAN???

#Sorry akdbrvekkdbrjekbdke this is just. not the first time I receive an ask of this kind and I really can't figure what makes this idea–#come across and how to stop it akdmbrkskdbbeksbdbeksk #I am. very much not. Besides I feel like my English is super broke so I thought at least *that* would give it away!!!#people asks me stuff #It's just. There's a big modern cultural colonization by the usa of my and other European countries–#which... Eh... Doesn't make me... Well... Uh... Very fond of the usa to put it that way #And I KNOW it's unfair towards the people and I love all of my friends from the usa deeply and truly #But like. I totally get this is just a small thing but like... It's hard to explain.#But you need to understand the influence the usa has on Europe is BAD. And at least in my country it's utterly terrible.#And it's more of an extension of a deep capitalist structure than all usa's fault but like... My country is currently undergoing a–#privatization of healthcare and education following a blatantly american model which is BAD. There's like one (1) thing that our country–#has going on which is free healthcare and some of the current leaders want to change that just because for them if that's how it works in–#the usa then it must be good. It's bad. it's screwed up. Once every year someone brings up making of the country a federal state–#like what the fuuuuuck what is wrong with everyone. Not to mention all the media we consume comes directly from the usa and contributes–#spreading the idea the usa is on top of the world and all other countries are underdeveloped compared to them. You see why it's bad #But like. God this is an awful and faulted way to reduce an extremely complex subject I really can't dwell on because an entire thesis–#could be written on it. But there's a huge cultural colonization in Europe that makes people feel like there's no possible alternative to–#late stage american capitalism which is sooooooo so so so fucked up.#Because capitalism wins the moment people start believing no alternative is possible

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medicinemane · 12 days

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#I get tired of people trying to explain what lens I should view the world through; what way I could think that would make everything better #forgive me but I don't care; I do what I do and I do what I can and you don't see the work I do under the hood #I don't want advice on self validation or whatever; I want... I want someone to hold a mirror up so I can actually see myself #by which I mean I want input on how I'm doing; if it's good enough; if it's worth anything; if anything I make is good #everyone things I'm nice; everyone has always thought I'm nice #but given nice leaves me profoundly isolated I don't think I care #not to mention in my opinion what nice in this instance means is that I'm capable of listening #it's mostly that I have manners rather than some quality about me #I'm well behaved and polite and can listen; and that's perceived as nice or even sweet #and it's not like I'm offended by people seeing me that way; but maybe you can get why... I can't do anything with that information #but if I'm doing enough... if I provide any value to the world... I might have heard that less times in my life than years I've lived #that's where I'm totally blind #people don't tend to offer any input; and also people don't tend to let me know what they're thinking #and I in fact am not a mind reader; I can often accurately infer things; but no of that means a thing till it's confirmed #and... well... hopefully no one reads the stupid shit I say and especially not the tags so this is safe and hidden #but truthfully people just like to hear that stuff they're doing is wanted and matters #and I do not #I don't know... gotta go do more cleaning cause I need to #and I have no idea if... I've got a reason for fighting so hard to clean; but I get very little input so... I expect... well...#and thankfully I don't think they read my tags so I can say this #but I really expect they won't take me up on my offer to come out here and get away from their parents; so there will be no pay off #not that I blame them in the slightest... it's just the only possible pay off for this cleaning would be helping someone I like out #and a scrap of company #but then again... in many ways anyone coming out to live with me is the worst thing they could probably do #sorry... I have a rather bleak outlook on many things surrounding myself purely cause of what I infer from the past #there is never pay off; only more shit I need to get done #I will never be loved; I will never be wanted; I will always just kinda be an afterthought that's occasionally worth venting to #no one will ever be particularly interested in anything I'm interested while I'll chase their interests or at least try to #certainly let them talk about them when they want #...though I take that over my normal total isolation... better to at least be permitted to follow in someone's shadow than have nothing

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hellborg · 3 months

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I know i drew a fox before. but I need a dragon fursona and a ram fursona... wanna have a ram with emo hair... it'd be so cool

#talking to myself tag #i drew like vance fox and vance dragon #i also think his fursona would be a spider/dragon mix not a woolf #i just like wolves and foxes lol #also need to draw anthro orion because i could totally see an au where he's got a full exotic conversion #need to make an chromed up exotic oc #if u follow me and dont know cyberpunk please know that 'exotic' is a term from the lore for people who get anthropomorphic augments TwT #I hate the term in the setting to be fair #it was made in the 80s osehfiuwahf #i think they should just be called like animal augments or something species conversion ?#exotic sounds sooo dated and weird

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aroaceleovaldez · 1 year

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okay that is all i can muster for tonight. my insanity will have to wait.

#AALV TSATS liveblogging #please just mentally picture me chewing on this book #luckily i dont follow too many RR blogs so i am relatively safe from spoilers *[STARES POINTEDLY AT ALL OF YOU]*#nobody send me spoilers i swear #ftr i am still taking literally everything in this book as Optional Canon #im enjoying the writing so far but. bro. you cant drop a major continuity error like that. its just blatantly incorrect.#and then say it's Totally Canon And Actually A Major Thing For These Characters IT DID NOT HAPPEN!!#IT PHYSICALLY COULD NOT HAVE!!#do not misquote the ancient texts to me witch. i was there when they were written #but Writing Is Decent. thankfully Nico's narrative voice is not as jarring as i was expecting #tbh he's actually written here kind like how i write him which is. delightful vindication.#also if we could STOP RETCONNING THE UNDERWORLD that'd be GREAT #will we ever get one trip to the underworld where it is consistent with literally any other trip down there? nope.#none of the details line up. none of the descriptions. ever. any of the times really. in any part.#youd think theyd make anything with Nico and the Underworld and Hades and their powers consistent for this book #based on the book tour is sounded like Mark sure tried #but like. yknow. Nico has a room in the underworld! in BoO his dad literally says ''Yeah you always have a place down here''#and theyre on good terms! also in BoO Nico uses dream powers! it's heavily implied he can inflict nightmares on people #we've known that since TLO actually #anyways. hrmhrhrmhrm grumble grumble #writing good. details i am biting. will keep posted #if yall do want my more unhinged thoughts i am also posting updates as i read in the discord #the ones im posting here are curated for your enjoyment

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silent-partner-412 · 1 year

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sometimes i’m reminded that the kaga saga games exist and goddamn i’m glad i chose not to add those to the scope of “fire emblem” games to get to during my marathon of them bc that would’ve been way too overwhelming

#fire emblem #i actually own vesteria saga on steam #so i could play it whenever i want #but with love i will not #at least not for a while #all i know about these games is that tear ring saga is so close to fe that it got kaga in a lot of trouble w nintendo #berwick saga is cited as the quote unquote best fire emblem game of all time by certain circles #despite it being like totally different in most ways #and then i want to say ppl call vestaria saga a true follow up to thracia #but i could be making that up #either way #i will play them one day #but not today and probably not this year

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saviourkingslut · 1 year

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finally finished s2 of the alienist... uhmm why was this season abt everyone BUT the alienist. hello. daniel brühl turn on your location i just want to talk

#WHERE was laszlo #literally they only gave him a bunch of scenes with lara pulver so they could?? send him off to europe at the end???? huh #he barely did anything at all the entire series. even for the case he was barely there to offer assistance #i get wanting to do a little more for sara's character but now it was HER show more than his #and no offence. but im watching the alienist. for the alienist.#my sister and i were SO disappointed by the last ep too #john marrying a woman he doesn't truly love just so he can? have a child?#laszlo fucking off to europe and leaving his whole ass institute behind?? WITH THE PATIENTS HE CARES ABT???#sara ending up in that classic 'strong independent women don't need a man they can be successful without them' hashtags feminism #as if wanting to be in a relationship with someone. makes you anti feminist or something.#society has progressed past the need for the independent strong women trope #where are the women in loving relationships with men who agree with them and their views and who wholly support them #women don't need to be alone/unhappy in their love life to be feminist characters. please.#i can't believe i dropped s2 ages ago and then finished it bc of daniel brühl and he's actually barely in it at all. incredible #if he's not in a possible follow up season i am not watching it. again it's called the alienist and that's what i am here for #curry rambles #ALSO WHY DID THEY KILL MARCUS?? that was totally unnecessary esp in a last ep like that.#cheap effort to get the audience emotionally involved #AND SPLITTING UP THE MAIN THREE CHARACTERS?? if you want your series to succeed. NEVER split up the #found fam at the end #is2g nothing kills my goodwill for a piece of media faster #the alienist

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phantomdecibel · 1 year

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Emitting a long and continuous high-pitched aaaaa over the fact that I just had a VIVID idea for something I want to draw

But.

I’m currently unable to get started on it. This is slaughtering me it is turning me inside out I am dying. I want this image to exist outside of my head SO BADLY but I can’t yet and now I am in pain.

Send help.

(y e s it was inspired by an Epic: the musical song leave me alone. I’ve been consumed it’s not my fault)

#the epic the musical brainrot strikes again #the song I was listening to was Full Speed Ahead specifically but the playlist has since moved on. now Polyphemus echoes through my mind.#totally gonna throw together a sketch the SECOND I get my hands on a sketchbook #although for clarity this idea is a digital painting #I just don’t want to forget #I heard ‘follow the birds- they will lead us to land- there we’ll hunt for food my second in command’#and an image of Odysseus standing on deck looking up at some birds in the distance or something took over my vision #I WILL make this a reality don’t even test me #wait no it was ‘watch where the birds fly’ yeah that was it #epic the musical #also I am no longer ‘a’ing thanks for asking #although I suppose it was more like an ‘e’ sound #it pains me to not have access to a SINGLE piece of paper for the moment #but rest assured I’m on a mission now #still feeling slightly inside out tho :/#wish I didn’t have to get up so early tomorrow so I could actually sit down and work on it smh

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afieldinengland · 1 year

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#thinking about back when i passed for a dorian myself. do you think i still do?#ah. too old in the eyes and the liver now maybe. my own fault— something’s harder in my middle. i suppose it’s adulthood #which is of course different to maturity. i already had that. i’d like to think at least #either way. i don’t know if i pass for a prince anymore. something else something else #would i want to? has there been a change that was total?#more like a wounded knight really. well it’s the pretty word games i miss— seducing with taboo. i’m telling stories again #only once or twice have i had the opportunity. dorian did it every day #ganymede narcissus…. hyacinth. warm dead boys #harri can you lighten up a little? you’re nineteen. twenty in july. youth.#there is absolutely nothing in this world but youth. nothing lonelier #i’m becoming my father. mad and soft and cynical #i doubt dorian could drink like i do. no weak london stock you’re wiltshire blood #shoulders to carry buckets. a stare to melt a canvas. i don’t know. i worry #talking talking talking. forgive me it’s been a while since i’ve loosened my tongue like this #i don’t know if i could be coveted. i know i have been. these things coexist #but i’m old now and i’m tired and i want to taste blood when i bite as well as tar-paper #conjuring up bloody idols to make a friend’s insides less haunting. shouldn’t even say that #just…. thinking. thinking thinking about prettier words that make men blush. i think i’m just lonely #dorian got sick of it too. emerging from the attic. now only dogs will follow me

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iamthescalesofjustice · 2 years

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had a dream segment that was so perplexing that i literally ignored the next part of my dream to sit down and analyze it.

#on one hand yeah sure what if dean winchester and the yiling patriarch were at canaan house. sure okay why not #on the other hand i dont fucking go to whatever fandom that second character is from and my understanding of the first is derived #largely from osmosis that itself apparently draws almost entirely from early and very late supernatural with massive gaps in between #where its just question marks that ive never cared enough to even make a cursory attempt to fill #there were other characters from other stuff there too its just that those two stood out bc i at least know the other characters #here is the sum total i know about the character called 'the yiling patriarch': they are referred to by this title instead of their name #commonly enough that i have seen it on the internet. they are from something written by the same person who wrote scum villain? there is #apparently necromancy in that setting. and thats it.#the connections i know of between that setting and the locked tomb are as follows: necromancy happens. also many of the characters have #multiple names and titles which they are referred to by which makes attempting to look into the series to get a feel for it and see if you #may want to get into it an exercise in frustration #this is all stuff i hashed out when i was ignoring the rest of the dream as it unfolded around me bc i was busy instead wracking my brains #for it bc i couldnt just look it up bc i would have to wake up to do that and i didnt want to yet if i could avoid it. which was the right #move bc i did end up getting back into the dream plot towards the end but i literally missed a whole middle segment and the introductory #stuff to the scenario of the last big segment before i woke up bc of this. bc i had to process that right after it happened

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mostlysignssomeportents · 5 months

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“If buying isn’t owning, piracy isn’t stealing”

20 years ago, I got in a (friendly) public spat with Chris Anderson, who was then the editor in chief of Wired. I'd publicly noted my disappointment with glowing Wired reviews of DRM-encumbered digital devices, prompting Anderson to call me unrealistic for expecting the magazine to condemn gadgets for their DRM:

https://longtail.typepad.com/the_long_tail/2004/12/is_drm_evil.html

I replied in public, telling him that he'd misunderstood. This wasn't an issue of ideological purity – it was about good reviewing practice. Wired was telling readers to buy a product because it had features x, y and z, but at any time in the future, without warning, without recourse, the vendor could switch off any of those features:

https://memex.craphound.com/2004/12/29/cory-responds-to-wired-editor-on-drm/

I proposed that all Wired endorsements for DRM-encumbered products should come with this disclaimer:

WARNING: THIS DEVICE’S FEATURES ARE SUBJECT TO REVOCATION WITHOUT NOTICE, ACCORDING TO TERMS SET OUT IN SECRET NEGOTIATIONS. YOUR INVESTMENT IS CONTINGENT ON THE GOODWILL OF THE WORLD’S MOST PARANOID, TECHNOPHOBIC ENTERTAINMENT EXECS. THIS DEVICE AND DEVICES LIKE IT ARE TYPICALLY USED TO CHARGE YOU FOR THINGS YOU USED TO GET FOR FREE — BE SURE TO FACTOR IN THE PRICE OF BUYING ALL YOUR MEDIA OVER AND OVER AGAIN. AT NO TIME IN HISTORY HAS ANY ENTERTAINMENT COMPANY GOTTEN A SWEET DEAL LIKE THIS FROM THE ELECTRONICS PEOPLE, BUT THIS TIME THEY’RE GETTING A TOTAL WALK. HERE, PUT THIS IN YOUR MOUTH, IT’LL MUFFLE YOUR WHIMPERS.

Wired didn't take me up on this suggestion.

But I was right. The ability to change features, prices, and availability of things you've already paid for is a powerful temptation to corporations. Inkjet printers were always a sleazy business, but once these printers got directly connected to the internet, companies like HP started pushing out "security updates" that modified your printer to make it reject the third-party ink you'd paid for:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2020/11/ink-stained-wretches-battle-soul-digital-freedom-taking-place-inside-your-printer

Now, this scam wouldn't work if you could just put things back the way they were before the "update," which is where the DRM comes in. A thicket of IP laws make reverse-engineering DRM-encumbered products into a felony. Combine always-on network access with indiscriminate criminalization of user modification, and the enshittification will follow, as surely as night follows day.

This is the root of all the right to repair shenanigans. Sure, companies withhold access to diagnostic codes and parts, but codes can be extracted and parts can be cloned. The real teeth in blocking repair comes from the law, not the tech. The company that makes McDonald's wildly unreliable McFlurry machines makes a fortune charging franchisees to fix these eternally broken appliances. When a third party threatened this racket by reverse-engineering the DRM that blocked independent repair, they got buried in legal threats:

https://pluralistic.net/2021/04/20/euthanize-rentier-enablers/#cold-war

Everybody loves this racket. In Poland, a team of security researchers at the OhMyHack conference just presented their teardown of the anti-repair features in NEWAG Impuls locomotives. NEWAG boobytrapped their trains to try and detect if they've been independently serviced, and to respond to any unauthorized repairs by bricking themselves:

https://mamot.fr/@[email protected]/111528162905209453

Poland is part of the EU, meaning that they are required to uphold the provisions of the 2001 EU Copyright Directive, including Article 6, which bans this kind of reverse-engineering. The researchers are planning to present their work again at the Chaos Communications Congress in Hamburg this month – Germany is also a party to the EUCD. The threat to researchers from presenting this work is real – but so is the threat to conferences that host them:

https://www.cnet.com/tech/services-and-software/researchers-face-legal-threats-over-sdmi-hack/

20 years ago, Chris Anderson told me that it was unrealistic to expect tech companies to refuse demands for DRM from the entertainment companies whose media they hoped to play. My argument – then and now – was that any tech company that sells you a gadget that can have its features revoked is defrauding you. You're paying for x, y and z – and if they are contractually required to remove x and y on demand, they are selling you something that you can't rely on, without making that clear to you.

But it's worse than that. When a tech company designs a device for remote, irreversible, nonconsensual downgrades, they invite both external and internal parties to demand those downgrades. Like Pavel Chekov says, a phaser on the bridge in Act I is going to go off by Act III. Selling a product that can be remotely, irreversibly, nonconsensually downgraded inevitably results in the worst person at the product-planning meeting proposing to do so. The fact that there are no penalties for doing so makes it impossible for the better people in that meeting to win the ensuing argument, leading to the moral injury of seeing a product you care about reduced to a pile of shit:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/11/25/moral-injury/#enshittification

But even if everyone at that table is a swell egg who wouldn't dream of enshittifying the product, the existence of a remote, irreversible, nonconsensual downgrade feature makes the product vulnerable to external actors who will demand that it be used. Back in 2022, Adobe informed its customers that it had lost its deal to include Pantone colors in Photoshop, Illustrator and other "software as a service" packages. As a result, users would now have to start paying a monthly fee to see their own, completed images. Fail to pay the fee and all the Pantone-coded pixels in your artwork would just show up as black:

https://pluralistic.net/2022/10/28/fade-to-black/#trust-the-process

Adobe blamed this on Pantone, and there was lots of speculation about what had happened. Had Pantone jacked up its price to Adobe, so Adobe passed the price on to its users in the hopes of embarrassing Pantone? Who knows? Who can know? That's the point: you invested in Photoshop, you spent money and time creating images with it, but you have no way to know whether or how you'll be able to access those images in the future. Those terms can change at any time, and if you don't like it, you can go fuck yourself.

These companies are all run by CEOs who got their MBAs at Darth Vader University, where the first lesson is "I have altered the deal, pray I don't alter it further." Adobe chose to design its software so it would be vulnerable to this kind of demand, and then its customers paid for that choice. Sure, Pantone are dicks, but this is Adobe's fault. They stuck a KICK ME sign to your back, and Pantone obliged.

This keeps happening and it's gonna keep happening. Last week, Playstation owners who'd bought (or "bought") Warner TV shows got messages telling them that Warner had walked away from its deal to sell videos through the Playstation store, and so all the videos they'd paid for were going to be deleted forever. They wouldn't even get refunds (to be clear, refunds would also be bullshit – when I was a bookseller, I didn't get to break into your house and steal the books I'd sold you, not even if I left some cash on your kitchen table).

Sure, Warner is an unbelievably shitty company run by the single most guillotineable executive in all of Southern California, the loathsome David Zaslav, who oversaw the merger of Warner with Discovery. Zaslav is the creep who figured out that he could make more money cancelling completed movies and TV shows and taking a tax writeoff than he stood to make by releasing them:

https://aftermath.site/there-is-no-piracy-without-ownership

Imagine putting years of your life into making a program – showing up on set at 5AM and leaving your kids to get their own breakfast, performing stunts that could maim or kill you, working 16-hour days during the acute phase of the covid pandemic and driving home in the night, only to have this absolute turd of a man delete the program before anyone could see it, forever, to get a minor tax advantage. Talk about moral injury!

But without Sony's complicity in designing a remote, irreversible, nonconsensual downgrade feature into the Playstation, Zaslav's war on art and creative workers would be limited to material that hadn't been released yet. Thanks to Sony's awful choices, David Zaslav can break into your house, steal your movies – and he doesn't even have to leave a twenty on your kitchen table.

The point here – the point I made 20 years ago to Chris Anderson – is that this is the foreseeable, inevitable result of designing devices for remote, irreversible, nonconsensual downgrades. Anyone who was paying attention should have figured that out in the GW Bush administration. Anyone who does this today? Absolute flaming garbage.

Sure, Zaslav deserves to be staked out over an anthill and slathered in high-fructose corn syrup. But save the next anthill for the Sony exec who shipped a product that would let Zaslav come into your home and rob you. That piece of shit knew what they were doing and they did it anyway. Fuck them. Sideways. With a brick.

Meanwhile, the studios keep making the case for stealing movies rather than paying for them. As Tyler James Hill wrote: "If buying isn't owning, piracy isn't stealing":

https://bsky.app/profile/tylerjameshill.bsky.social/post/3kflw2lvam42n

If you'd like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here's a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/12/08/playstationed/#tyler-james-hill

Image: Alan Levine (modified) https://pxhere.com/en/photo/218986

CC BY 2.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/2.0/

#pluralistic #playstation #sony #copyright #copyfight #drm #monopoly #enshittification #batgirl #road runner #financiazation #the end of ownership #ip

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therealbeachfox · 3 months

Text

Twenty years ago, February 15th, 2004, I got married for the first time.

It was twenty years earlier than I ever expected to.

To celebrate/comemorate the date, I'm sitting down to write out everything I remember as I remember it. No checking all the pictures I took or all the times I've written about this before. I'm not going to turn to my husband (of twenty years, how the f'ing hell) to remember a detail for me.

This is not a 100% accurate recounting of that first wild weekend in San Francisco. But it -is- a 100% accurate recounting of how I remember it today, twenty years after the fact.

Join me below, if you would.

2004 was an election year, and much like conservatives are whipping up anti-trans hysteria and anti-trans bills and propositions to drive out the vote today, in 2004 it was all anti-gay stuff. Specifically, preventing the evil scourge of same-sex marriage from destroying everything good and decent in the world.

Enter Gavin Newstrom. At the time, he was the newly elected mayor of San Francisco. Despite living next door to the city all my life, I hadn’t even heard of the man until Valentines Day 2004 when he announced that gay marriage was legal in San Francisco and started marrying people at city hall.

It was a political stunt. It was very obviously a political stunt. That shit was illegal, after all. But it was a very sweet political stunt. I still remember the front page photo of two ancient women hugging each other forehead to forehead and crying happy tears.

But it was only going to last for as long as it took for the California legal system to come in and make them knock it off.

The next day, we’re on the phone with an acquaintance, and she casually mentions that she’s surprised the two of us aren’t up at San Francisco getting married with everyone else.

“Everyone else?” Goes I, “I thought they would’ve shut that down already?”

“Oh no!” goes she, “The courts aren’t open until Tuesday. Presidents Day on Monday and all. They’re doing them all weekend long!”

We didn’t know because social media wasn’t a thing yet. I only knew as much about it as I’d read on CNN, and most of the blogs I was following were more focused on what bullshit President George W Bush was up to that day.

"Well shit", me and my man go, "do you wanna?" I mean, it’s a political stunt, it wont really mean anything, but we’re not going to get another chance like this for at least 20 years. Why not?

The next day, Sunday, we get up early. We drive north to the southern-most BART station. We load onto Bay Area Rapid Transit, and rattle back and forth all the way to the San Francisco City Hall stop.

We had slightly miscalculated.

Apparently, demand for marriages was far outstripping the staff they had on hand to process them. Who knew. Everyone who’d gotten turned away Saturday had been given tickets with times to show up Sunday to get their marriages done. My babe and I, we could either wait to see if there was a space that opened up, or come back the next day, Monday.

“Isn’t City Hall closed on Monday?” I asked. “It’s a holiday”

“Oh sure,” they reply, “but people are allowed to volunteer their time to come in and work on stuff anyways. And we have a lot of people who want to volunteer their time to have the marriage licensing offices open tomorrow.”

“Oh cool,” we go, “Backup.”

“Make sure you’re here if you do,” they say, “because the California Supreme Court is back in session Tuesday, and will be reviewing the motion that got filed to shut us down.”

And all this shit is super not-legal, so they’ll totally be shutting us down goes unsaid.

00000

We don’t get in Saturday. We wind up hanging out most of the day, though.

It’s… incredible. I can say, without hyperbole, that I have never experienced so much concentrated joy and happiness and celebration of others’ joy and happiness in all my life before or since. My face literally ached from grinning. Every other minute, a new couple was coming out of City Hall, waving their paperwork to the crowd and cheering and leaping and skipping. Two glorious Latina women in full Mariachi band outfits came out, one in the arms of another. A pair of Jewish boys with their families and Rabbi. One couple managed to get a Just Married convertible arranged complete with tin-cans tied to the bumper to drive off in. More than once I was giving some rice to throw at whoever was coming out next.

At some point in the mid-afternoon, there was a sudden wave of extra cheering from the several hundred of us gathered at the steps, even though no one was coming out. There was a group going up the steps to head inside, with some generic black-haired shiny guy at the front. My not-yet-husband nudged me, “That’s Newsom.” He said, because he knew I was hopeless about matching names and people.

Ooooooh, I go. That explains it. Then I joined in the cheers. He waved and ducked inside.

So dusk is starting to fall. It’s February, so it’s only six or so, but it’s getting dark.

“Should we just try getting in line for tomorrow -now-?” we ask.

“Yeah, I’m afraid that’s not going to be possible.” One of the volunteers tells us. “We’re not allowed to have people hang out overnight like this unless there are facilities for them and security. We’d need Porta-Poties for a thousand people and police patrols and the whole lot, and no one had time to get all that organized. Your best bet is to get home, sleep, and then catch the first BART train up at 5am and keep your fingers crossed.

Monday is the last day to do this, after all.

00000

So we go home. We crash out early. We wake up at 4:00. We drive an hour to hit the BART station. We get the first train up. We arrive at City Hall at 6:30AM.

The line stretches around the entirety of San Francisco City Hall. You could toss a can of Coke from the end of the line to the people who’re up to be first through the doors and not have to worry about cracking it open after.

“Uh.” We go. “What the fuck is -this-?”

So.

Remember why they weren’t going to be able to have people hang out overnight?

Turns out, enough SF cops were willing to volunteer unpaid time to do patrols to cover security. And some anonymous person delivered over a dozen Porta-Poties that’d gotten dropped off around 8 the night before.

It’s 6:30 am, there are almost a thousand people in front of us in line to get this literal once in a lifetime marriage, the last chance we expect to have for at least 15 more years (it was 2004, gay rights were getting shoved back on every front. It was not looking good. We were just happy we lived in California were we at least weren’t likely to loose job protections any time soon.).

Then it starts to rain.

We had not dressed for rain.

00000

Here is how the next six hours go.

We’re in line. Once the doors open at 7am, it will creep forward at a slow crawl. It’s around 7 when someone shows up with garbage bags for everyone. Cut holes for the head and arms and you’ve got a makeshift raincoat! So you’ve got hundreds of gays and lesbians decked out in the nicest shit they could get on short notice wearing trashbags over it.

Everyone is so happy.

Everyone is so nervous/scared/frantic that we wont be able to get through the doors before they close for the day.

People online start making delivery orders.

Coffee and bagels are ordered in bulk and delivered to City Hall for whoever needs it. We get pizza. We get roses. Random people come by who just want to give hugs to people in line because they’re just so happy for us. The tour busses make detours to go past the lines. Chinese tourists lean out with their cameras and shout GOOD LUCK while car horns honk.

A single sad man holding a Bible tries to talk people out of doing this, tells us all we’re sinning and to please don’t. He gives up after an hour. A nun replaces him with a small sign about how this is against God’s will. She leaves after it disintegrates in the rain.

The day before, when it was sunny, there had been a lot of protestors. Including a large Muslim group with their signs about how “Not even DOGS do such things!” Which… Yes they do.

A lot of snide words are said (by me) about how the fact that we’re willing to come out in the rain to do this while they’re not willing to come out in the rain to protest it proves who actually gives an actual shit about the topic.

Time passes. I measure it based on which side of City Hall we’re on. The doors face East. We start on Northside. Coffee and trashbags are delivered when we’re on the North Side. Pizza first starts showing up when we’re on Westside, which is also where I see Bible Man and Nun. Roses are delivered on Southside. And so forth.

00000

We have Line Neighbors.

Ahead of us are a gay couple a decade or two older than us. They’ve been together for eight years. The older one is a school teacher. He has his coat collar up and turns away from any news cameras that come near while we reposition ourselves between the lenses and him. He’s worried about the parents of one of his students seeing him on the news and getting him fired. The younger one will step away to get interviewed on his own later on. They drove down for the weekend once they heard what was going on. They’d started around the same time we did, coming from the Northeast, and are parked in a nearby garage.

The most perky energetic joyful woman I’ve ever met shows up right after we turned the corner to Southside to tackle the younger of the two into a hug. She’s their local friend who’d just gotten their message about what they’re doing and she will NOT be missing this. She is -so- happy for them. Her friends cry on her shoulders at her unconditional joy.

Behind us are a lesbian couple who’d been up in San Francisco to celebrate their 12th anniversary together. “We met here Valentines Day weekend! We live down in San Diego, now, but we like to come up for the weekend because it’s our first love city.”

“Then they announced -this-,” the other one says, “and we can’t leave until we get married. I called work Sunday and told them I calling in sick until Wednesday.”

“I told them why,” her partner says, “I don’t care if they want to give me trouble for it. This is worth it. Fuck them.”

My husband-to-be and I look at each other. We’ve been together for not even two years at this point. Less than two years. Is it right for us to be here? We’re potentially taking a spot from another couple that’d been together longer, who needed it more, who deserved it more.”

“Don’t you fucking dare.” Says the 40-something gay couple in front of us.

“This is as much for you as it is for us!” says the lesbian couple who’ve been together for over a decade behind us.

“You kids are too cute together,” says the gay couple’s friend. “you -have- to. Someday -you’re- going to be the old gay couple that’s been together for years and years, and you deserve to have been married by then.”

We stay in line.

It’s while we’re on the Southside of City Hall, just about to turn the corner to Eastside at long last that we pick up our own companions. A white woman who reminds me an awful lot of my aunt with a four year old black boy riding on her shoulders. “Can we say we’re with you? His uncles are already inside and they’re not letting anyone in who isn’t with a couple right there.” “Of course!” we say.

The kid is so very confused about what all the big deal is, but there’s free pizza and the busses keep driving by and honking, so he’s having a great time.

We pass by a statue of Lincoln with ‘Marriage for All!’ and "Gay Rights are Human Rights!" flags tucked in the crooks of his arms and hanging off his hat.

It’s about noon, noon-thirty when we finally make it through the doors and out of the rain.

They’ve promised that anyone who’s inside when the doors shut will get married. We made it. We’re safe.

We still have a -long- way to go.

00000

They’re trying to fit as many people into City Hall as possible. Partially to get people out of the rain, mostly to get as many people indoors as possible. The line now stretches down into the basement and up side stairs and through hallways I’m not entirely sure the public should ever be given access to. We crawl along slowly but surely.

It’s after we’ve gone through the low-ceiling basement hallways past offices and storage and back up another set of staircases and are going through a back hallway of low-ranked functionary offices that someone comes along handing out the paperwork. “It’s an hour or so until you hit the office, but take the time to fill these out so you don’t have to do it there!”

We spend our time filling out the paperwork against walls, against backs, on stone floors, on books.

We enter one of the public areas, filled with displays and photos of City Hall Demonstrations of years past.

I take pictures of the big black and white photo of the Abraham Lincoln statue holding banners and signs against segregation and for civil rights.

The four year old boy we helped get inside runs past us around this time, chased by a blond haired girl about his own age, both perused by an exhausted looking teenager helplessly begging them to stop running.

Everyone is wet and exhausted and vibrating with anticipation and the building-wide aura of happiness that infuses everything.

The line goes into the marriage office. A dozen people are at the desk, shoulder to shoulder, far more than it was built to have working it at once.

A Sister of Perpetual Indulgence is directing people to city officials the moment they open up. She’s done up in her nun getup with all her makeup on and her beard is fluffed and be-glittered and on point. “Oh, I was here yesterday getting married myself, but today I’m acting as your guide. Number 4 sweeties, and -Congradulatiooooons!-“

The guy behind the counter has been there since six. It’s now 1:30. He’s still giddy with joy. He counts our money. He takes our paperwork, reviews it, stamps it, sends off the parts he needs to, and hands the rest back to us. “Alright, go to the Rotunda, they’ll direct you to someone who’ll do the ceremony. Then, if you want the certificate, they’ll direct you to -that- line.” “Can’t you just mail it to us?” “Normally, yeah, but the moment the courts shut us down, we’re not going to be allowed to.”

We take our paperwork and join the line to the Rotunda.

If you’ve seen James Bond: A View to a Kill, you’ve seen the San Francisco City Hall Rotunda. There are literally a dozen spots set up along the balconies that overlook the open area where marriage officials and witnesses are gathered and are just processing people through as fast as they can.

That’s for the people who didn’t bring their own wedding officials.

There’s a Catholic-adjacent couple there who seem to have brought their entire families -and- the priest on the main steps. They’re doing the whole damn thing. There’s at least one more Rabbi at work, I can’t remember what else. Just that there was a -lot-.

We get directed to the second story, northside. The San Francisco City Treasurer is one of our two witnesses. Our marriage officient is some other elected official I cannot remember for the life of me (and I'm only writing down what I can actively remember, so I can't turn to my husband next to me and ask, but he'll have remembered because that's what he does.)

I have a wilting lily flower tucked into my shirt pocket. My pants have water stains up to the knees. My hair is still wet from the rain, I am blubbering, and I can’t get the ring on my husband’s finger. The picture is a treat, I tell you.

There really isn’t a word for the mix of emotions I had at that time. Complete disbelief that this was reality and was happening. Relief that we’d made it. Awe at how many dozens of people had personally cheered for us along the way and the hundreds to thousands who’d cheered for us generally.

Then we're married.

Then we get in line to get our license.

It’s another hour. This time, the line goes through the higher stories. Then snakes around and goes past the doorway to the mayor’s office.

Mayor Newsom is not in today. And will be having trouble getting into his office on Tuesday because of the absolute barricade of letters and flowers and folded up notes and stuffed animals and City Hall maps with black marked “THANK YOU!”s that have been piled up against it.

We make it to the marriage records office.

I take a picture of my now husband standing in front of a case of the marriage records for 1902-1912. Numerous kids are curled up in corners sleeping. My own memory is spotty. I just know we got the papers, and then we’re done with lines. We get out, we head to the front entrance, and we walk out onto the City Hall steps.

It's almost 3PM.

00000

There are cheers, there’s rice thrown at us, there are hundreds of people celebrating us with unconditional love and joy and I had never before felt the goodness that exists in humanity to such an extent. It’s no longer raining, just a light sprinkle, but there are still no protestors. There’s barely even any news vans.

We make our way through the gauntlet, we get hands shaked, people with signs reading ”Congratulations!” jump up and down for us. We hit the sidewalks, and we begin to limp our way back to the BART station.

I’m at the BART station, we’re waiting for our train back south, and I’m sitting on the ground leaning against a pillar and in danger of falling asleep when a nondescript young man stops in front of me and shuffles his feet nervously. “Hey. I just- I saw you guys, down at City Hall, and I just… I’m so happy for you. I’m so proud of what you could do. I’m- I’m just really glad, glad you could get to do this.”

He shakes my hand, clasps it with both of his and shakes it. I thank him and he smiles and then hurries away as fast as he can without running.

Our train arrives and the trip south passes in a semilucid blur.

We get back to our car and climb in.

It’s 4:30 and we are starving.

There’s a Carls Jr near the station that we stop off at and have our first official meal as a married couple. We sit by the window and watch people walking past and pick out others who are returning from San Francisco. We're all easy to pick out, what with the combination of giddiness and water damage.

We get home about 6-7. We take the dog out for a good long walk after being left alone for two days in a row. We shower. We bundle ourselves up. We bury ourselves in blankets and curl up and just sort of sit adrift in the surrealness of what we’d just done.

We wake up the next day, Tuesday, to read that the California State Supreme Court has rejected the petition to shut down the San Francisco weddings because the paperwork had a misplaced comma that made the meaning of one phrase unclear.

The State Supreme Court would proceed to play similar bureaucratic tricks to drag the process out for nearly a full month before they have nothing left and finally shut down Mayor Newsom’s marriages.

My parents had been out of state at the time at a convention. They were flying into SFO about the same moment we were walking out of City Hall. I apologized to them later for not waiting and my mom all but shook me by the shoulders. “No! No one knew that they’d go on for so long! You did what you needed to do! I’ll just be there for the next one!”

00000

It was just a piece of paper. Legally, it didn’t even hold any weight thirty days later. My philosophy at the time was “marriage really isn’t that important, aside from the legal benefits. It’s just confirming what you already have.”

But maybe it’s just societal weight, or ingrained culture, or something, but it was different after. The way I described it at the time, and I’ve never really come up with a better metaphor is, “It’s like we were both holding onto each other in the middle of the ocean in the middle of a storm. We were keeping each other above water, we were each other’s support. But then we got this piece of paper. And it was like the ground rose up to meet our feet. We were still in an ocean, still in the middle of a storm, but there was a solid foundation beneath our feet. We still supported each other, but there was this other thing that was also keeping our heads above the water.

It was different. It was better. It made things more solid and real.

I am forever grateful for all the forces and all the people who came together to make it possible. It’s been twenty years and we’re still together and still married.

We did a domestic partnership a year later to get the legal paperwork. We’d done a private ceremony with proper rings (not just ones grabbed out of the husband’s collection hours before) before then. And in 2008, we did a legal marriage again.

Rushed. In a hurry. Because there was Proposition 13 to be voted on which would make them all illegal again if it passed.

It did, but we were already married at that point, and they couldn’t negate it that time.

Another few years after that, the Supreme Court finally threw up their hands and said "Fine! It's been legal in places and nothing's caught on fire or been devoured by locusts. It's legal everywhere. Shut up about it!"

And that was that.

00000

When I was in highschool, in the late 90s, I didn’t expect to see legal gay marriage until I was in my 50s. I just couldn’t see how the American public as it was would ever be okay with it.

I never expected to be getting married within five years. I never expected it to be legal nationwide before I’d barely started by 30s. I never thought I’d be in my 40s and it’d be such a non-issue that the conservative rabble rousers would’ve had to move onto other wedge issues altogether.

I never thought that I could introduce another man as my husband and absolutely no one involved would so much as blink.

I never thought I’d live in this world.

And it’s twenty years later today. I wonder how our line buddies are doing. Those babies who were running around the wide open rooms playing tag will have graduated college by now. The kids whose parents the one line-buddy was worried would see him are probably married too now. Some of them to others of the same gender.

I don’t have some greater message to make with all this. Other then, culture can shift suddenly in ways you can’t predict. For good or ill. Mainly this is just me remembering the craziest fucking 36 hours of my life twenty years after the fact and sharing them with all of you.

The future we’re resigned to doesn’t have to be the one we live in. Society can shift faster than you think. The unimaginable of twenty years ago is the baseline reality of today.

And always remember that the people who want to get married will show up by the thousands in rain that none of those who’re against it will brave.

#gay marriage #gay rights #gay history #gay

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