#I fucking hate everyone who supports this shit

[featherymainffins]

Peace and love on planet Earth but if I see one more post NOT about recovery and, in fact, encouraging eating disorders in the ed recovery tag, I might just turn into a chimpanzee and tear everyone's faces off.

#ed recovery #are you people for real? #ONE. I'm asking for ONE tag. #how tone-deaf and cruel do you have to be to post your active ed behaviour absolutely without any trigger warnings #or forewords #you know what i foolishly expect in the es recovery tag? ed recovery. yes i know very presumptuous of me. #i expect people who are trying to recover or are in recovery sharing their experiences and maybe some body positivity #talking about how hard recovery can be; for example. etc etc. #you know what happens in the tag? of course you do. ana meal diaries. posts about nothing but how much you body check #talking about how much you hate yourself because you're trying to lose 10kg and yesterday you had a salad and now you're asking #for tips how to get better at restricting and continuing your ed. #everyone who does that is a ghoul. and I'm done being nice and ignoring that shit. #like. some fucking room check maybe? I'm sitting in my flat shaking from cold which is caused only partly by the room temperature #and I'm doing my best to avoid everyone i know because i can't stand the thought of them seeing my form and when someone #i know accidentally meets me on the street or somewhere i feel like shit because I'm disgusting and if it were up to me #i wouldn't even leave this flat at all. so you know. naturally. i try to get myself at least some form #of support. i try to look for positivity for people like me; who are trying to recover. i want an outside source to affirm that I am not #repulsive. that I'm not insane when i think that all bodies are cool and fascinating and that there's no way or shape anyone is #expecting me to be in order to earn their love or at least their lust. and what do i get instead? you ghouls #wonderful. lovely. think about all the people like me next time you decide to post that shit in the recovery tag. thanks.

[im-getting-help]

Another day, another panic attack.

I honestly don't know what to do, I don't know what I can do. I can't work and my country is speedrunning economic ruin thanks to our lovely president who hates people and common sense in equal measure.

Even if I can get a job, which is almost impossible at this rate, I won't be able to keep it, I know, and that's IF I can get out of the panic state I enter every time I think about working.

I woke up today and the first thing I did was have a panic attack, and it's been like this for days now. I have to open YT and distract myself cause nothing else works except for completely disengage with reality.

I can't even do the essays and reading for uni cause I get paranoid and start doubting myself, and there we go again to the next panick attack or crying session. It's been only a month and i'm already late on assignments cause the only thing I want can to do is sleep.

Hello depression and anxiety, I did not missed you guys.

In november of last year, when our current president won the elections, I knew that everything was going to go to shit pretty quickly. Here we are, 1 kilo of potato is $1400 pesos. WHO CAN AFFORD THAT? We spent at least $400.000 pesos every month only in food cause everything is so expensive, we are in debt just to cover basic necessities.

And I wish I was fcking normal, I wish I could just pick up any job and go to work and make some money, but I can't.

Yeah, anyways, im going to make some tea and idk pray I guess(???) pray that some psychiatrists in this miserable island gives me a fcking appointment and takes my inability to maintain a job seriously instead of dismiss me with a "well, I think you just need therapy, good fcking luck :)"

#vent post #i dont fucking know #i hate this country #i mean it #everyone i know says that Argentina is so beautiful and rich with culture and its truw #but when they say things like the argentinians are so kind and helpful #IS SUCH A LIE #kind people wouldn'v vote for such a piece of shit president #whose leaving millions in absolute poverty #whose actively fighting to change the fcking constitution to fuck us all for profit #who wants to sell the country to the US and exchange our culture for 2 dollars and 20 cents #argentinians aren't kind #they're extroverted #they're cheery #they're charismatic #but they are not kind #no one who supports that stupid piece of shit can be kind

[lord-squiggletits]

IDW1 must take place on an alternate Earth where no one has ever heard of ACAB and everyone wears "thin blue line" merchandise because there's literally no other way that a single Autobot killing a USAmerican cop in self defense would be such worldwide news that even Mexican journalists would go "OMG???? You like, killed a cop?!?!?!?!?!?!!?!?!?" and it wasn't even framed as like, "you killed a human," the phrasing every time any character talked about it was very specifically "he killed a cop".

The cop was also threatening to shoot a group of surrendering/not-attacking/injured Autobots btw which is just the icing on the cake honestly lmao

#yeah i still think about how that plot point's handling in phase 2 was fucking dumb #you can't convince me that if a usamerican cop got shot by an alien people wouldn't be making memes about it #ppl would be making memes like 'you know a pig is a pig because he'll even shoot alien robots when they're surrendering' #i'm also mad bc the gun that that cop had was a replica of cybertronian guns that meg spread among earth's populace #and what's worse is spike and this other guy literally HEARD M EXPLAIN HIS EVIL PLAN ABOUT THIS #but somehow in phase 2 literally no one ever brings it up ever again #like not even spike brings up the whole 'yeah M had mind controlling guns that he did specifically to destabilize the population' #he was just like 'nah that autobot shot a cop the autobots are evil now' #but like. i wanna make the earth ac/ab memes so badly lmao #you know that ppl would be making 'officer down' jokes about some cop getting killed by an alien robot #don't try to tell me that it's bc they're alien robots people would suddenly support the US #ppl literally make 9/11 jokes bc they hate the US that much don't even try to tell me earth would suddenly unite over a usamerican cop #getting shot on the job no less #and this is also a story written by barber who's literally the ac/ab writer that gave OP shit for being a cop so like #it's honestly so baffling. like was he trying to make a point about police brutality #bc jazz is black coded and he killed a cop so that's why barber wrote everyone hating jazz for it? #idek it's just another one of those stupid plot contrivances i hate and make me unable to take the rest of the story seriously

[solradguy]

Some clowns are posting about it in the tag and I've gotten a bunch of new followers recently interested in GG Strive, so I just wanna take a sec and remind everyone that Strive's arcade mode, the part of the game where Bridget (with encouragement from Goldlewis and Ky to decide for herself how she wishes to identify) decides that she is a girl after all, doesn't have "bad" endings. It's not like the last games where certain routes lead to really obviously unfortunate outcomes. Bridget being referred to with she/her pronouns in text (like her official bio and ArcSys tweets) confirms that the ending where she realizes that she is a girl after all is her canon ending for the arcade mode. ArcSys do their localization (ie, translations) in-house so saying it's a mistranslation doesn't have even a toe to stand on either.

And for the love of all life PLEASE stop using machine translators for Japanese. They are all notoriously bad at Japanese because of how nuanced the language is. Yes, even DeepL.

#groomed #textpost #Sorry I keep posting about this specifically but god I wish I had encouragement back when I was questioning like Bridget #Goldlewis and Ky being supportive and making sure that Bridget makes this decision on her own but that she also knows she has support for- #-whichever decision she decides to make just hits me right in the feels #All trans people being into being trans is a stupid fucking no braincells take #I'm trans but I didn't know it was something you were allowed to do until I was like 20 #Everything I knew about trans people before then depicted them as a joke or everyone hated them or they 'regretted' it bc it was a story- #-written by some transphobe shithead #I WISH I had someone who sat me down and was like 'this is a thing you can do if it feels right to you but it's only a decision u can make' #I ALWAYS knew something wacky was going on with my gender but I never confronted it until I was like 24 #I had these feelings DESPITE being raised in an environment EXTREMELY hostile towards trans people #So fuck you if you think trans people can only be groomed into being trans #I wasted so many years hating myself and who I was because I thought if I changed my gender I would be hated and a joke #Then I finally did it and I'm so happy with myself now #I used to legit be unable to look at myself in the mirror I hated myself so much #Now I'm fucking jacked and wear whatever I want and I love myself so much #I'll crush every transphobe skull under my giant goth boot #Shit your guts out & die 1000 agonizing deaths if you think Bridget didn't make this decision on her own based on feelings she's always had #Her and I are transitioning in different directions (I'm trans masc) but her story is so relatable #I have absolutely no tolerance for anyone talking bad about her and I will fight on this hill until the day I die

[chalkeater]

The groomer you were warned about is now posting in the safeutdr tags with triggering content and using alts to invade anti-proship spaces. Still support them? tumblr(.)com/snowcollector/713865354217144320/

hey can you not fucking accuse me of supporting anyone. good that you made your callout post but dont send me asks about this anymore and especially PHRASED like this??

"Still support them?" I care about the issues. I made my stances about these topics already. Do you care about this problem at all or do you want to point the finger at me now just to get me to reblog your post? For context this makes you sound smug. and i dont appreciate that if you actually want to give me new info to educate me (see what its like to be accused of.)

yeah i agree you shouldnt post unsafe/mature shit in safeutdr. but wow you dont make it any better either. I dont want to be involved in this and I never did so stop sending me anything related to this anymore. Why do you accuse me of being friends with ANY OF THEM I have no idea who they are!!!!!

#get fucking away from me i already had a had a whole episode because of the grooming issue. READ MY POSTS OR GET OFF MY FUCKING PAGE #also yeah letting this ask be published because. rubs my fucking temples. if anyone wants to see the link there it fucking is i guess #might as well let yall judge on your own this fucking shit motherfuckign i hate everyth hashtag emo hashtag scene hashtag anger hashtag die #im mostly just angry about the 'still support them?' get off anon right now. get off anon you coward. why are you afraid? #and putting ME on the line? #might delete later (never does) #ask #anon #grooming #I hate grooming and groomers i hate incest what do you want me to fucking say #fuck everyone who does #and the reason i refuse to reblog callouts is because ive been on tumblr since 2014 and sometimes they go south so fast in MANY different w #ways. pulls at my hair #i dont want my name associated with ANYTHING. FUCK INCEST FUCK GROOMING is that what you want because i DO Believe that

[immamapletreekid]

work anxiety starting before work itself hahahahaahahahahahahhhaha

#IM BAKCIJ THE FUCKIGN BUIDLIGN .AGAIN. AUSUSUXHEHWHGLHKF #im grateful i have an internship for this summer with the way the job market is like currently. #im grateful that i have the opportunity to lessen the burden on my parents shoulders. im grateful that this job can pay rent and groceries #and tuition for a few terms im grateful i get to gain experience while still in school that will hekp me in the future #IM GRATEFUL FOR ALL THIS!!!!! BUT STILL I FUCLING HATE EVERYTHJGN #i hate being unable to eat anything ir sleep at night bc all i can think about is shit i have work tomorrow i have to email this guy and #finish these tasks and impress my manager and be approachable and enthusiastic and eager to learn and not make any mistakes #and not fail anything bc im getting graded on this its alwags grades its always the fucking grades #isnt it. it was the grades that had me crying on walks home from school when i was 9 and it was grades that made me waste away 9th grade #it was grades that made me unable to stomach anything during weeks with tests and it was and is still grades that #dictate every single fucking part of my life #and even tho the ppl who used to yell at me for getting a B in math in 5th grade are no longer yelling at me for getting 60s in linear algeb #ra and stats and calculus and cs #haha.ha when ur university is famous for its.. horribly high suicdie rates #i find that the yelling comes from me now. ive replaced the adults who would sit beside me at the dinner table #yelling bc yea guess what 8 year old me didnt understand division at first #god i hate this school so much. i hate what im studying im gratefula nd am so privileged to be ahle to further my educarion and receive #all these experiences mot everyone can have but god everytime i return to the city where the school is #i feel like throwing up and sobbing and just never ipening my eyes again #haha yea. i hope i csn get a job to support myself in the future #i hope i can still have time for hobbies #why si everyone at school so good at everything #ive met more people who have passed their rcm 10 and arct exams for piano than those who havent #i have classes with people who have already published research papers with professors in the states #my classmates can breeze through a cs assignment while still playing fir varisty teams. working out everyday. goijg ti parties. #eating and cooking balsnced meals each week. having a social life..the whole combo #meanwhile i get overwhelmed because i have to respond to an email and finish an assignment in one day #how do i become like them #why was this about work anxiety at first and why is it about the eternal imposter syndrome and lack of self confidence #i just want money man... i dont give a shit about snything anymore

[izzy-b-hands]

I really wish blocking someone meant their stuff wouldn’t wind up on your dash at all. Like I understand why it doesn’t, but. still.

Actually, I just need to get better abt checking source urls before I reblog. I try to be mindful, but now and again I Forget and have only myself to blame lmao

#text post #I would love to reblog their art and be supportive in that way at least but tbh #every time I accidentally reblog it I remember checking out their blog and seeing how they talked abt fans that like Izzy and the izcourse #and it's like oh no that's right you hate ppl like me and ur art might be gorg but maybe we just shouldn't interact #they do their thing and I'll be over here doing mine #what really needs to happen is I need to remember to check urls on fandom art to make sure it isn't any of the folks I had to block lmao #but sometimes I get excited bc the art is genuinely lovely and i do like it and think the person is v talented! #and then i forget to check and it's only after scrolling my dash that i see my reblog and the url and go 'oh. fuck. that's right. damnit.' #it's a weird feeling to be like yes I want this person to have fun and make gorgeous art but also it seems #they've made it p clear how they feel abt folks like me and so maybe they would prefer i just fuck off #which i tried to do by blocking!! and yet. here we are #i delete the reblogs whenever this happens so they don't have me in their notes but #i do hope they know their art is lovely and I appreciate their hard work even if we wouldn't otherwise get along with each other #idek why I'm blogging abt this I guess bc I feel like usually it's either or online? like u either hate each other or u don't #but I don't hate the folks who sent shit to me or the folks who condoned it i just wish i had found a way to get along with them instead #as useless a wish as that probably is #and i don't talk abt it a lot but it really bugs the fuck outta me sometimes that we can't just start over and try to interact generally #no messages no trying to be friends just reblog from them if u like and otherwise ignore each other #which has been a thing that's worked fairly okay in other fandoms tho things have happened in others to change how workable it was #but for some reason in this one i feel like im just always walking on eggshells to interact w/anyone bc it feels like everyone is waiting #for someone else to say something they vaguely disagree with and instead of just like. blocking and moving on w/the fandom experience #it turns into a massive mess that even if ur on the fringes of it all you still get pulled into or sent shit and just. #idk it doesn't matter bc ultimately none of this does but dang it the show has been special to me and hits all my special interests #and it's hard to let go and accept that there's no changing how things went and how they are and how this fandom experience for me is often #very fucking lonely even when i'm bursting at the seams to share and to hear from others what they think abt anything and everything w/it #no one is gonna read this tag essay lmao pls scroll on

[pirate-in-daps]

beware controversial uk football opinions below i don't watch football or follow football so don't come for my jugular please and thanks

i'm not a man city fan but the bare hatred people have for them is wild like

all footie teams but esp premier league teams are the same babes join us lot in league 1 if you're saying your team isn't "like that" and you'll see how "like that" they are

#my team literally just sacked hoey barton none of our teams are pious #newcastle is just sportswashing on steroids like #also fuck man city all my homies have a complicated relationship with the club their father supports also fuck man city #and fuck chelsea too i used to support chelsea and a chelsea fan made me miss my bus the other day fuck chelsea dudes #also also fuck man city their women's team took sunderland's place in the super league #i am indiscriminate i hate all teams equally especially my own and especially especially our derby partners #everyone always hates whoever is top of the league and then some the only virtuous team is everton who will never be in that position #also liverpool is blue also fuck everton also also yeovil town have the best colours #i am legally required to hate yeovil town #best merch is mackem but shit colour scheme #'you don't follow football you don't get an opinion' football follows me so yeah i do #if you take any of this seriously then the joke is on you bestie

[skyteglad]

the desire for people to stop diagnosing their abusers with stigmatized disorders when they are literally not a psychologist and most abusers literally do not care about psychology or therapy at all 😩 they don’t care about getting help, so how do YOU know they have this disorder without using stigma as a basis?

#i keep seeing a lot of talk about 'narcassistic abuse' and people diagnosing every abuser in their life w npd and #LIKE YES SOME PROBABLY HAVE BEEN DIAGNOSED BUT YOU'RE JUST DIAGNOSING THEM USING STIGMA. THAT'S... THAT'S CRUEL LMAO. #saw a post calling everyone w npd an abuser and being the cause of people w bpd and its like... honey... #my abuser who caused my bpd? she doesn't have npd. afaik she hasn't seen a fucking psychologist since she was 16 because she doesn't care #abt therapy. a lot fo abusers.... DON'T CARE ABOUT THERAPY OR GETTING HELP. #you can BE abusive without Abusive Personality Disorder tm (WHICH ISN'T A FUCKING TIHNG BTW.) #it's so gross please guys don't speculate on people's mental health some people are perfectly neurotypical and functional... #and are jsut abusive as shit! #you don't need a mental illness to be abusive and THINKING like that is going to end with you thinking incredibly ableistly!!! #grumbles a lot #things i love value and support: self diagnosis! #things i loathe despise and hate: diagnosing others when you aren't using good faith. #sorry for rambling i'm just so mad dghfkjdkd 'everyone w bpd has bpd bc of people w npd' shut the fuck up are you kidding me kffghdkhgj #i wasn't abused with 'narcassistic abuse' as a child i was abused with physical and emotional abuse. the other thing isn't a fucking thing. #when i WAS abused with what fits 'narcassistic abuse' - it was fucking emotional abuse my guy. that's what it is. the listing of everything #you claim is this is actually fitting into emotional abuse. idk if they have npd i dont CARE if they have npd i only CARE #that i had been abused and harmed. their mental health means NOTHING to me now because they shouldn't have done what #they did no matter what and it isnt an excuse OR an explanation!!! thank you -bows- #riot.txt #i forgot all of my text tags so i hoppe that's the right one

[starii-lins]

hi guys i identify as fucking done and my pronouns are sick&tired

#the world is fucked up and im fucking done #kinda vent post?? #palestine congo sudan libya all that fucking shit #why are people so fucking selfish what did anyone do to deserve any of this??? #wars are SO FUCKING STUPID #genocide is FLABBERGASTIJGLY DUMB #I KNOW ITS OBVIOUS BUT APPARENTLY THE PEOPLE WHO ARE ACTUALLY IN CHARGE DONT UNDERSTAND IT?? #FUCKING DONE IM FUCKING DONE #istfg we are living in a dystopia #free palestine #free congo #free sudan #free everyone who is suffering #rant #im so fucing angry i hate this #what next what other countries are being silenced what other people are being attacked and fucking suffering #why is this all happening now why is it happening at all #fuck you #fuck you sincerely anyone who supports the colonizers in this situation #fuck you humanity for being so fuckign cruel #vent #stop this fucking genocide #stop the genocide #is it that hard to have basic fucking empathy

[femmeroi]

kill yourself faggot

Our relationship is rough right now, but in a few episodes we will be married.

#Pretty sure I know who sent this considering... everything #If you manage to see this even after I blocked you heres a list of reasons why I blocked you- since you want to know so bad #1.) Your views on sex work are regressive- I don't like how you demeaned that line of work simply because a of model was mean to you #2.) I am not comfortable with the way you talk about trans people- you are casually mysgonistic and transphobic when talking about them #You being trans does not give you a pass for this imho #3.) For all the posturing you do about the ZeXal skirts you and your friends are weird about under age characters + the post about #Edo being “apparently legal” was just gross to me. Your friend being weird about Yuri is how I originally found and blocked you. #4.) I don't like how you called someone a bitch just because they blocked you- you said you gave their art “nothing but support” #Before they blocked you. People do not owe you kindness or time or patience just because you liked their art. #You are not entitled to friendship or courtesy or anything at all just because you rebloged someones art. #5.) You hate Yu/ bel so much you call them a “child predator” I REALLY don't think you'd like following me considering they're my angel #When I have time again I want to dedicate more of my posts to Judai/Yu/ bel/Jun content and you'd fucking hate your life seeing that #So I blocked you before that became an issue. #I had you blocked for a while but when the VRAINS discourse happened I unblocked you so I could easily see what was up #Unfortunately I forgot to reblock you and I only remembered about your whole existence after you interacted with me #Usually I say shit like “Not everyone is going to like you and you just have to accept that as okay” #But in your case- there's a reason so many people have you blocked. #It's not because you have a “problematic fave” like you claim- it's because you have rancid fucking vibes #I'd rather people not interact with or acknowledge this post btw- I'm going to ignore anything further because idgaf about it all #I just wanted to annoy mr deranged by yu/beling all over their ask lol

[pepprs]

hi update things are fucking terrible and my eyes hurt from sobbing. lol

#purrs #delete later #not to liveblog and be tmi or whatever but i feel terribly alone and terribly miserable so this is in fact a cry for help lol. or really #comfort bc im fucking going insane. so for context last spring when i was still an intern another intern orchestrated this back channel #where everyone was supposed to talk shit about our supervisors (my dearest most belovedest mentors) and all of us hid it for months and it #all came to a head at asb 2022 because there was a lot of drama witb the asb student facilitators and our staff team. and it was sooooo ugly #and messy and horrible and probably played a direct role in one of my dearest beloved est mentors (who was the point person for asb) fucking #getting a new job and abandoning us in july lol 😃😃😃😃😃😃😃 and so i became a full time staff member and me and my remaining dearest belovedest #colleague besties fucking carried the world on oh r shoulders and put on amazing programs as just 3 of us in the core staff and we thought w #we were doing a really good job with the asb 2023 leaders and that there were no drama dynamics or whatever and guess fucking what. tonight #we found out that half of them hate us for reasons we still don’t know and all of them are at each others throats and also some of the #participants feel a type of way about us. and i know i am being a fragile sensitive crybaby over it but i have had terrible cramps all day a #and have barely slept since ive been here and feel like ive been bending over backwards to support the leaders only to find out that half of #them think we’re evil and i just… i couldn’t take it. so i cried and now im beating myself up for crying. but it’s like come ON. i know we #did a pretty imperfect job of preparing them for this. and i should just take responsibility for that and not be defensive. but it’s like… i #have NEVER seen this program in person before or been part of the planning of it. i was just a student last year like all of you. and also #HOW many fucking times did we create space for you to talk to us and invite us in. and still this shit happened. and i just feel like a #failure. and i couldn’t react to that information in any way except cry liek it’s all so over my head and out of my depth and im not as #emotionally mature as my colleagues bc im the youngest and this is my first time dealing with this and i feel so incompetent and like i #failed. failed the first time by not speaking up when i was implicated in the stupid fucking Google form back channel situation last year #and now failed the second time by not being able to prevent this stupid drama bullshit from happening again and for not catching it. and jfs #like… im in excruciating physical pain and haven’t slept and haven’t eaten well and my life is falling apart and we were ABANDONED BY THE #PERSON WHO WAS RESPONDIBLE FOR THIS (i know we weren’t abandoned she literally just got a new job i just have psychological issues) and #we’ve been running at a million miles per hour with absolutely no break and now you’re mad at us and not even telling us and it’s impacting #everyone’s experiences but you want to pretend this is fucking high school and keep secrets. i am TIRED of drama. i am TIRED of this stupid #bullshit. and not to say this bc i don’t know if asb 2022 drama factored into her decision to leave but if it did i get why * left now. i #get it. bc this shit makes me want to jump out the hotel window. i do not want to face any of them tomorrow and deal with more bullshit. i #am emotionally unstable and incompetent and not equipped to deal with this in a mature healthy way. i want this to be over NOW. im done. #ok i think that’s it um. sorry about that i just needed other people to know i am suffering and i will suppress the shame i feel about that #just this once. esp bc i denied myself the opportunity for my colleague besties to comfort me while i was crying and i regret it now lol

[bunny-heels]

i think fnaf needs to die like real bad like im not joking

#the bun talks #i shouldnt be ranting about the things i hate but god i hate fnaf #its so shit the whole community is in shambles everyone acts like kids people STILL SUPPORT SCOTT and hes STILL INVOLVED IN MAKING THINGS #FOR IT EVEN THOUGH HE ''RETIRED'' #the games are all bad security breach is janky and gross and ugly the story makes no fucking sense the dlc isnt any better #the fact that today i saw someone who f/od monty say that they didnt even finish the fucking game so they dont even know if he dies like.... #and now vibingleafs reimagine came out right after fnaf+ got supposedly cancelled #i just i cant. take shit no more please. please let this stupid fucking franchise die im fucking serious #please make your own thing make your own mascot horror or whatever just stop touching fnaf

[mcnuggyy]

how is it that my parents manage to guilt trip me into letting them borrow more and more money from me as soon as I make progress towards my saving goals… like man…. I know they’re pretty good about paying me back but I can’t help but feel like I’m just constantly going to be trapped in this back and forth forever and never be able to leave this house… man…..

#callate guero #:-( #sigh #it’s complicating I won’t get into it #and I know they need it but ough #i finally reached my next milestone and just like that I lost half of my savings because of poor planning and decisions on my DADS part #anyways #i hope it’s worth And god really does give back in double because wow do I need a miracle to ever leave this house 😞 #growing up in an abusive household where your parents are still nice to you enough some of the times where you feel guilty for not giving #them what they need and knowing it’s complicating because your poor and the abuse was cultural but you know you’re well within your right to #still hate them especially after the threats they made towards you at 15 but also they made a 180 and support you now even if they don’t #understand but also they’ve never apologized for the physical and emotional abuse of the past and it’s weird and complicating and also they #have given up so much just being in this country for you risking it fucking all but also you know you will never ever ever be able to be #your true self around them without fear or judgement or worse #if ur a child of immigrants who grew up w a shit ton of generational trauma and an abusive conservative household raise ur hand <3 #bonus points if everyone makes excuses for their behavior because it’s ‘cultural’ yippieeee

[unproduciblesmackdown]

as ever like: no two things Need to be juxtaposed, much less like material vs material deathmatch Only One Can Be Good, much less am i thinking i have thee objective word on fuckall b/c who does and it's like perfectly boring & unserious whenever someone just throws out Takes that are just "i think...[xyz] is [adjective]" like okay.

but anyways thinking of how, though differing in execution in a lot of ways ofc, deh & bmc start out in a v similar place & explore a journey to self-acceptance from a despairing starting point....it feels like a lot of the hindrance in deh's exploration of its own Theme there is in like, hey. :) hand on your shoulder. it's okay b/c you'll be able to be more normal. whereas w/bmc it's that it's okay b/c you'll be able to be more abnormal

#like hell yeah. and Normality is fake the way that things like Gender is fake so. what's more universally relevant here #versus like. the idea that a winning takeaway re: deh is Talking With Your Parents / Kid like #yeah that could be an improvement? in other situations; that Talking is dangerous &/or just not going to happen / be irrelevant #meanwhile nobody is ''normal'' & the idea of Normality & its Moral Goodness / Requirement does affect everyone #meanwhile that bmc is clear on jeremy's gaining supportive relationships means support for his relationship w/himself #whilest he's also able to feel better insulated from feeling Defined by whatever instance of feedback/input #whereas with deh it's like. All These People....but log off & all you need is at least one parent who doesn't hate you No Matter What #including your unfortunate abnormality....Just(tm) make the phone calls am i right? well now he at least has a part time job #meanwhile difficult to compare w/e's going on w/zoe/evan vs mpdg4mpdg jeremy/christine. latter are cute & a coherent relationship #former are [nothing] to [i'm taking psychic damage] & fuck if i know what's going on besides The Ultimate Romance(tm) (negative) #he was a boy she was a girl they could politely tolerate each other's presence. maybe forever :') #i really don't know what's supposed to be going on there so like. for real share Any reasons you like each other in Either love song abt it #anyways like No Need To Compare but for me the juxtaposition is natural b/c it Does feel like they can be looked at re: a v similar Essence #but one is fumbling around w/it & really Not sticking the landing especially while the other just does exactly what it's trying to do #and ofc it could only help that deh had to go so far from the original [???] ideas & more Farcical approach #vs i don't think bmc's envisioning ever changed so fundamentally along its development at any point #like deh's story does feel like it still has the remnants of the earlier farcier versions even in its bway form #story of A Bunch Of Wild Shit Happens To Our Protag Whaaat & sure ppl are humanized but you still never made room for like a quarter of the #alana & jared? they're alright but they died #anyways & in all these things it's like It's Not A Big Deal lol i am not here to strive to have thee true & final word #right tf on if you as well know them both & like deh more / think It was the more successful execution of its story #though i have natural enemies like say [trt loyalists who are Like That] or forever [deh haters who are Like That]....we're different #erased a tangent also mentioning how i like the Parent Approach of mr. heere's arc better than any parents in deh lol. like of course #it's Not about his Feelings or being Imperfect or Human. like ofc he has the feelings & is human & imperfect #but he just gets energized & focused like welp bummer but ofc i gotta give my kid more support w/whatever he's going through rn #like hell yeah. one fun song we're good to go #bmc #deh

[notascreepyasyouthink]

fuck me man i am not doing good

#transphobia is getting to me #not just from the media and government but also just. from my family and the people around me #i feel like i've waited too late to transition #maybe i'll just stay semi-closeted for the rest of my life #the world is intimidating and cruel and negligent #i am reminded of when i was with my toxic ex last year and he made me feel so inadequate and ugly and broken bc i was trans #except now it's not just him it's most people out here #i'm scared of trusting people because what if they treat me like he did #idk i just wish i was cis. i wish i wasn't mentally ill #i am so fucked up and i try not to let it get to me and do my best but it hardly ever works #everyone's been kinda treating me differently because i might be bipolar and that's 'one of the bad ones' #and i hate it because i've been like this for most of my life it's just now i'm seeing a professional who knows what i've got #and i haven't even told my parents yet because they'd lose their shit but i wish i could tell them bc i really need support #i feel so alone right now #anyways