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#I know in the game as Ethan you can also technically use the knife
athunderstryke · 10 months
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LEON S(quats) KENNEDY and Ethan with how they deal with locked doors.
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This isn't Ethan slander, I love him with my whole heart. I just think its so funny that these two games handle these type of locks differently.
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trashcatsnark · 2 years
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Collapse DLC Spoilers part 2 electric boogaloo
I haven't done all the things in one run, but i have like beaten the dlc now, Wemod works for cheats, for anyone who needs them. More thots under cut
while i give some leniency to the fact that the dlc is in Joe Bro's mind, so, like his diseased little lump of gray matter is probably fucking things up. I agree that like some stuff just feels ooc for the seeds imo, and I also understand that for most of us our broad understanding of the seeds is more fanon than canon, due to the long distance between fc5, the dlc, (not gonna mention new dawn), and like the fact that in the og game you get like... 3 cutscenes per non-joe, technically 2, since Joe always stole one from each. (takes over the baptism, lectures in the bliss, and tells baby murder story while in cage) So, like, realistically... I get that the versions of John, Jacob, and Faith i have in my head are probably more from my head than from canon at this point.
Like John's little, "urges" speech is definitely feels like an oversimplification of what is a lot going on in that head of his. But I do like the idea that Joe was like ayyyyyyy jebus made you homicidal for a reason , John.
Here for Rachel slapping Joseph's glasses off. And I do find it... inchresting that Johnny Boy can put a knife to Joseph's throat and he's chill with it, but one slap from Rachel and he's ready to throw hands with the 5'2 tinkerbell lady.
I again, fucking hate this weird pseudo-incesty, was Faith/Rachel and him like... romantic energy thing they do. Like, his wife's name was Faith... really????? Really?????? We're doing that????? Really????
I did appreciate that the deputy did get something in the bunker, "the last member of his family" wanted more though. Like again, I know the siblings are the focus, but the deputy is such a weird non-entity in this dlc given their role as ya know, the protagonist in the og game.
And like... the real ooc moment for me and like I get that this is Joseph's voice showing him visions of what could have happened/supposedly would if the siblings had survived. So, it could be Joseph's fears and stuff, but... that's gonna bullshit and I'll explain in a bit. But, the most ooc moment for me personally, was the idea that Jacob would kill Joseph. I can 100000 percent see him becoming suicidal, but... he's dedicated his whole ass life to protecting his family and you're telling me a couple years into bunker life he's just gonna flip the script and kill his brother???? Jacob is the one who'd thrive the most in bunker life, lets be honest.
Now, as for why I think the "its joseph's brain, so of course that wouldn't really happen, its just his fears" is a idea I'm not giving much credence too is... Ethan's in his mind. And the reason, I say that kind of undercuts that theory is because this is meant to take place while Joe is still in the bunker with the dep, this basically confirms Joseph/voice can actually see the future. Because... how else would his brain be able to show him his whole ass shitty sequel son.
idk, like, again, I liked seeing The Seeds again, kind of got some worms wriggling for fc5 again. But... it most made me just wanna go back to the og fc5 game where the weird pseudo incest tones is limited to like one line.
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irresistiibles · 3 years
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so uh, this is a whole monstrosity, but beneath the cut is a plotting call for the event! i have included all of my characters, sorted by location, with blurbs about what they will be doing and possible plots for them. they are just some ideas i came up with and are absolutely not limited to what i put down! anyway, toss this a like and i will hit you up to plot! 
washington dc
asami sato / legend of korra / aware
recently aware and lowkey thankful cause she has more fighting memories from her real life. not actively running out and looking for a fight against these ridiculous creatures but she’s got a taser, real decent martial arts training, and a history of handling herself against much stronger enemies. she’ll be fine, probably looking for a place to bunker down and grabbing anyone who seems like they’re in danger as she goes. worried about korra cause she doesn’t have her memories so she doesn’t know if she can defend herself
plots: could help people. could bunker down with people. could fight monsters with people. could try and build some quick tnt to throw at monsters with people. could try and steal and hotwire a car to get away from monsters with people. lots of opportunities here it’s a party.
blue sargent / the raven cycle / aware
trying to keep out of the way. she doesn’t know if her powers will make the monsters more powerful, but she knows there’s a pretty solid chance and though she is feral enough to fight she doesn’t want to risk it. has a pocket knife and spite for defense but she is under five feet tall and absolutely should not try to take anything on. probably using the chaos as an excuse to steal convenience store tea
plots: someone trying to keep her out of fights. someone she’s bunkered down with. maybe someone with powers she can enhance who’s fighting or something that she helps. 
ciel phantomhive / black butler / aware
he’s tiny and has asthma this is not an ideal situation for him. he does also have a gun but ciel isn’t stupid (most of the time) and definitely knows how to pick his battles. intelligence battles he can handle on his own but strength? absolutely not. will be trying to run and bunker down and potentially find someone who looks bigger and stronger than him to play the pity card of ‘i’m young and tiny and only have one eye’ to try and get some protection.
plots: we aren’t built for fighting so we’re running and bunkering down crew. ciel will be faking some kindness in this event because there’s powers in numbers and if it comes down to it he can trip someone else while running from a monster. someone protecting him like mentioned above. maybe someone who comes and saves his ungrateful ass. legit anything
donna benviento / resident evil / aware
girl is not a fighter. in the game she relies on illusions to fight ethan, which she will be using with any of the monsters possible in order to create escape routes for herself. will be searching for someone familiar since all the people she knows here can be fighters and she hopes like her enough to help her out.
plots: not the type to necessarily help anyone since she’s focused on helping herself, but could give some encouragement to someone else struggling. maybe someone who gets caught in a hallucination she intended for a monster just cause that would be wild. 
entrapta / she-ra / unaware
she’s doing fine. this is the sort of woman who can make explosives on the go. not actively trying to fight monsters but not actively hiding either. she’s curious to an extreme fault and will be interested in all the weird things running around washington. though she knows it isn’t safe she desperately wants a sample and will be trying to find monster corpses or even something she can sneak up on to get one.
plots: someone trying to get her away from danger. someone hanging around her because even though she isn’t hiding she can blow up the monsters and seem safe. someone fighting monsters she’s latched onto planning to get a sample after they kill something
jaskier / the witcher / unaware
lmao he is not doing fine. even if he had his memories mans was a bard and though i think jaskier has a feral side that’s more for like bar fights than monsters. he’ll be working on hiding though he’s a little shit and won’t be able to stop himself from peaking out to try and get a story for a song from all of this. lowkey think he’ll run into a monster from the witcher and trigger some memories because i am ready to know some stuff if not everything.
plots: if anyone wants to offer this man any defense that would be cool. anyone he bunkers down with. someone stuck hearing his song ideas because he’ll probably be composing as he goes like an absolute fool. anyone who witnesses him get caught by a monster and have to stick with the defense of attempting to punch it in the face and run lol. i’m cool with whatever
karolina dean / marvel’s runaways / unaware
though she is unaware karolina is luckily aware of her powers and will be using them to get herself through this. her powers aren’t reallysomething she uses often and they do cause her to become exhausted after extended use so that’s definitely a possible problem.
plots: asdfaldsfkj
lavender brown / harry potter / aware 
just thinking about the last time monsters came to life in the city and is very unhappy about it. mostly trying to hide she did not fuck with this the last time it happened and she does not fuck with it now. knows a little bit of fighting magic if it really comes down to it. will follow people to where they bunker down
plots: someone she gets stuck fighting a monster with despite wanting to dip (could develop into reluctant fighting pals). hiding buddies.  someone who helps her if she panics and just trying to hide in a dark street. legit whatever
lily evans / harry potter / unaware
she is without magic or a wand or memories and doing her best with pepper spray and a decent chunk of anger. will be trying to help people despite her lack of defenses cause she’s foolish. very well may be dying in this because i want her memories back and this feels like an opportunity (considering the other ideas i have had are all awful)  
plots: anyone she helps. anyone who helps her/drags her away from danger when she attempts to run right in. if anyone wants something big she could die trying to protect someone i’m open to options
river song / doctor who / semi-aware
let’s be real this is not the most dangerous situation river has ever been in. i would love to say she’s using her competence to help people but unfortunately she’s probably using the chaos as an excuse to rob high end stores. may help someone in a real casual aloof way where she’s passing by and shoots and monster but it’s not really a moral obligation thing rip. a little worried about where her mom is cause she just found out she definitely has a mom, so she can’t just lose her.
plots: someone she casually helps and then tries to dip from immediately. anyone interested in theft. may go to some fighting for the fun of it so if anyone wants to join she will be down
michiru kaioh / sailor moon / aware
very unhappy about the situation. mostly wants to find haruka considering the last real bad situation in washington had her seeing her dead body so. may provide a little protection along the way but she’s definitely on the colder side and is not meant to be a full time protector for anyone. will probably be transformed in her sailor neptune form to be able to handle the situation as best as possible
plots: someone she helps but tries to ditch. someone who asks her for help who she refuses. maybe someone who sees her fighting and comes by to join only for her to be like ‘oh you got this? i’m out then thanks for handling it.’ 
pansy parkinson / harry potter / aware
planning on following her successful plan that she carried out during jumanji, raiding a liquor store and finding a place to hide. will not be as easy as it was during the storm of course, but i think she’ll still kinda manage it. may get in a fight or two on the way there but that’s about it. maybe she could get injured or something lol whatever works
plots: drinking assholes buddies baby! if she does get a little injured someone for that thread (where she would probably be stupid enough to try and clean out an injury with her drinks). could save someone by accident. someone who witnesses theft lmao and has whatever reaction you want.
quinn fabray / glee / aware
uuuh quinn has many skills but none of them are made for this situation. i guess she can run kinda fast from cheerleading so that’s her best hope. it’s her one and only plan and she will be attempting to just run and hide. is not making an attempt to fight because she’s not stupid and knows anything out there could snap her in half.
plots: someone who offers some protection/saves her from a monster. bunker buddies. some regular human she’s camping out hiding with where they’re both like ‘what the actual fuck is going on in this city???’
tessa gray / the infernal devices / unaware
so she technically has magic but does she know how to use it? absolutely the fuck not. might use a tiny bit in self defense because she’s understandably very freaked out by all of this. like she knows there’s some supernatural stuff but she’s never prepared for this level of things. kinda stuck between wanting to save herself and feeling like she should help people but not knowing how so she does neither as a result. her main plan of defense is stabbing someone despite having no idea how to do so
plots: some sort of help for this victorian woman trying to survive. someone around if she accidentally uses magic to defend herself with no idea how. someone she helps get to safety. 
toph beifong / avatar the last airbender / aware
lets be real she’s having a blast. loves to fight and loves fighting in a situation where she doesn’t have to worry about morals and wow should you hurt this person?? obviously monsters can be hurt so she’s in the clear and will be throwing boulders without any hesitation. lowkey thriving and running into chaos headfirst. 
plots: though it wouldn’t be out of kindness she could help people or shield them or whatever. fighting buddies. someone who decides to stick by her cause she can clearly take out monsters. anything.
zagreus / hades / aware
honestly has spent the most recent part of his life fighting his way out of the underworld so this is not too crazy for him. he’s also died a lot so his concern for his own life is minimum. will be fighting and trying to help because he is a well meaning boy who doesn’t think people should be involved in this stuff if they don’t want to be. though earth was supposed to be better than this and is kinda thrown off and maybe a little sad.
plots: anyone he helps by saving from a monster or leading to safety. could steal a weapon off of someone lol. someone he starts questioning mid battle about whether or not this a common thing on earth
zhongli / genshin impact / aware
this man is very difficult to kill. he can summon meteors and shield himself from damage lmao. probably trying to take out as many monsters as possible but like in a for the greater good to save the people sort of way. reasons killing things is more helpful in the long term than slowly saving on person after another. 
plots: could shield someone from an attack last minute. battle buddies. someone he accidentally frightens by calling down a whole ass meteor and handling that. will save people if they get stuck in combat just not helping people to safety or anything, so there’s options. 
the island
albedo / genshin impact / aware
not gonna lie albedo is not nearly as worried as he should be. the man is bad at having emotional reactions to anything. if anything he’s really intrigued to be on a new location and will be trying to get plant and soil samples despite everything else going on.
plots: someone trying to get him to safety would be funny since it would be a very difficult task.  maybe someone also just vibing with him. a research partner who he just pulls in by accident because he’s like ‘hey get me some of those flowers over there’ and they’re thrown off or whatever to the point where they just do it. 
alec lightwood / shadowhunters / aware
a nervous man trying not to come off as nervous. will mostly be looking for magnus/issy, and turn out to subsequently be very unhappy when he realizes they aren’t there/are in washington (if one of them texts him). from there it’ll be about helping people and trying to keep people safe. this isn’t the sort of dangerous situation he’s used to dealing with (turns out you can’t fight the weather with a bow and arrow) but he’s heavily trained and will manage well enough himself and feels semi obligated to help regular humans survive
plots: any people he’s helping try to keep out of danger. someone aware of his concerns about his people back in washington. uuh literally anything he will be working real hard to play it cool but it’s hard when the people you care about are who knows how far aware and cell service is hard to get in a monsoon or lightning storm (he may try and find the tallest areas to scale just to try and get a text out so if anyone wants to join him they’re welcome to) 
esther mckinnon / harry potter / aware
mentally cursing magic and all of the nonsense that comes with it that refuses to leave her alone so she can chill. luckily, though she’s not amazing with much magic she was always slightly better with defensive stuff or charms rather than straight up attack battle magic. luckily she’s been keeping her wand on her more often than usual cause dying will do that to a person. trying to find/contact her family and survive
plots: sort of survival crew sort of deal. she’s probably half tempted to see if she can swim back to washington so someone should talk her down
gerry keay / the magnus archives / aware
similar to esther is real tired of magic stuff or cult stuff or whatever it is and is kinda pissed to still be a part of it. he’s kinda concerned this has something to do with the entities and will be running around a bit looking for answers at the start before deciding that isn’t happening and just being tired of it. also pretty sure he’s survived worse so don’t be surprised to see him smoking a cigarette through a storm somehow acting like things are chill. is nice and wants to help people even if he doesn’t seem like it so will probably move into action the second he sees anyone struggling.
plots: if your character is tired of this shit and wants to share a cigarette they are more than welcome. he will help people in whatever way he can. someone needs to tell him you can’t fight the weather with arson because that’s the only move he’s got.
glinda upland / wicked / aware
lowkey a little pissed she was not given a warning about all of this so she could at least show up in a proper beach outfit. real tempted to just hide in her bubble and float in that until this is over but isn’t sure if that would actually help. also has bad memories when it comes to extreme weather conditions. can use some magic to try and help herself with but glinda is not built for thinking under pressure so big rip
plots: someone offering her some help she needs it. someone who witnesses her attempting to keep her hair styled throughout all of this. literally whatever.
haruhi fujioka / ouran high school host club / aware
a little too confident and bad at accepting help. will be doing their best to get through this on their own, and probably semi managing but not as good as they could with some help, especially considering they are human and so many others are not. will offer others help even though their biggest and best plan is to hide however possible
plots: reluctantly accepted help. maybe the opposite of someone trying to offer help and haruhi adamantly refusing. a hiding crew of sort, where haruhi would stick with someone else under the assumption that more eyes in better and she’s still mostly handling herself.
jin ling / the untamed / unaware
stubborn like haruhi, but will recognize his limits much faster. kinda overconfident with a habbit of running headfirst into things and them directly going to shit. lowkey thinking he could get injured and get some flashes of his memories back but not become completely aware, just a sense of things. hoping his dog is safe back home
plots: please someone help this boy dear god. if i do go with an injury maybe someone pulling him out of whatever shit he gets himself into. any sort of group safety or help that can deal with him being a little mean because that’s just how he is unfortunately. 
kyoshi / avatar the last airbender / unaware
‘let kyoshi bend a meteor’ an admin said to me as a joke but you know what? she could so why not! will be attempting to utilize the bending she barely understands to get through the weather and will probably be semi successful considering she’s best at bending giant amounts of elements rather than precise bending. will be keeping herself safe but nervous about anyone being near her due to not feeling in control
plots: someone she saves with her bending. someone that could get hurt from her bending something into them accidentally (though probably not too seriously). someone hanging around her to stay safe but it’s just making her nervous but she doesn’t want to tell them to leave her alone so it’s a struggle all around
namaari / and the last dragon / aware
is used to surviving in difficult weather situations. not this bad but like, it’s not so far out of her comfort zone that she’s absolutely screwed. probably has a good instinct for it. doesn’t trust super easily so will not be super jazzed about joining a group but could go with a person or two.
plots: someone she impulsively helps. someone who helps her and she gets stuck feeling like she has to thank them and hangs around till she gets a chance to repay them (or she ditches them to save her own skin). working together but she’s clearly hesitant with them
pearl / steven universe / aware
she’ll be good. i mean very confused and concerned about how she got out of the city, but interested in finding out how it all works. will be trying to do some research around the horrible weather. is also a very fast builder and could probably manage some shelter. if she decides there’s nothing to find may try and establish a place to just stay at and deal with the weather. does have a moral compass and will attempt to help people.
plots: someone she helps/saves. any people interested in looking for answers with her that don’t have enough concern about the weather situation. can try and build some protection structures for people.
rita skeeter / harry potter / aware
real tempted to turn into a bug and just bury in the dirt until this is all over. may start that way even until earthquake kicks in and that doesn’t feel safe either. will be a beetle for some of it though. luckily most of her magic skill is in defense (she has always prepared for the day someone snaps and tries to punch her) so she’ll kinda manage, but is a selfish bitch only out for herself so do not expect much from her in terms of help. will try and start doing interviews on the island despite the craziness to prep for the article she’s gonna write after
plots: someone she starts trying to interview mid chaos. someone who pulls her out of danger while she’s filming something. lmao if someone wants to see her turn out of a bug for the laughs (or discovering she’s an illegal animagus) that could happen i’m down for whatever
victor nikiforov / yuri on ice / aware
sir is absolutely not built for this. nothing in his career has built him for this, it’s just made him a charismatic egomaniac with bad knees and ankles. probably makes a snapchat story along the lines of ‘someone come save me i’m a national treasure.’
plots: will cling onto people for help so anyone stuck with him. could offer money in return for people with any form of protection/support. making unfortunate snapchat stories/instagram posts as it goes. let him pull some people into the wildest selfies ever.
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pjo for any mix of 2, 5, 8, 14, 19, 20, and/or 21?
I have a bunch of asks for this meme but I have finally seen MY BOY again in Son of Neptune and I missed him desperately, so.
2) Emotional/moral weak spots
Percy “let the world burn to save a friend” Jackson’s emotional weak spot--his Achilles heel, if you will--is always the people around him.  Not always just friends, either.  Anyone he thinks of as his responsibility will qualify, from his civilian parents to his camp rivals to outright enemies (Ethan Nakamura, anyone?).  He’s good at muscling through it, at bearing up and fighting on, but deep down he’s still a twelve-year-old kid who’s risking his life for someone who lied to him and watching his mother turn to dust.  Deep down, Percy never really left that hill, and you can tell.
This is also the single most powerful trap that Percy’s good heart can fall into, the biggest moral blindspot he has.  Once someone crosses that line, hurts someone Percy considers his to protect, they’d better hope the judges of Hades have mercy on them, because Percy sure won’t.
5) Guilty pleasures
Percy mostly embraces the attitude that if anyone has earned some junk food and trash TV, it’s him.  He and Annabeth watch cooking shows when they’re too tired or insomniac to function--stuff like Cutthroat Kitchen, where they can watch people get really intense and high-adrenaline about relatively low-stakes issues.  They find it calming.  The closest Percy really comes to a guilty pleasure--in the sense of never ever admitting to anyone how much he genuinely enjoys it--is watching Annabeth’s architectural shows.  You know those shows on Netflix and YouTube that are just a couple of people gushing over weird buildings?  Annabeth loves those.  Percy has never retained a single piece of information from the shows themselves, but he likes to sit with Annabeth’s back against his chest and his chin on her shoulder and his arms around her waist, so that she can pause it every five minutes to provide color commentary without asking him to move.  Annabeth has Some Thoughts about the pseudo-brutalist concrete-facing-and-bulky-squares aesthetic and Percy can repeat that rant word for word.  He has no idea what half the words mean but he sure does know every single one of them.  He puts up a good front of being dragged into watching her nerd shit, but Annabeth Knows The Truth.
Also, related, but Percy finds it very soothing to have Annabeth on his lap or asleep on his chest and something like a firm couch or a wall at his back.  He thinks it’s something about the pressure--it’s a little like being underwater.
8) Bad memories/experiences
What isn’t, to be honest.  But I think for a while there after Mount Saint Helens, Percy was really, truly, deeply afraid of fire.  Hard to hold onto a phobia when you’ve got a world to save, but sometimes when he’s standing too near to a fire, he still feels the heat seize up in his chest and the instinctive craving for water.
14) Ingrained habits/forces of habit
Percy’s number one top habits are clearly being enthralled with Annabeth, taking over armies, and terrifying acts of demigod, based on the 20% of Son of Neptune I’ve gotten through.  In that order.
As far as headcanons go, I’m firmly convinced that Percy is the worst fidgeter in two camps full of fidgeters.  He plays with his necklace and drums Riptide on tables and knocks his knuckles into his ribs or knees or temple and clicks his tongue and paces and plays with Annabeth’s hair and and and--  Annabeth, whose ADHD is much more inattentive type than Percy’s raging combined type, finds it charming, her personal perpetual motion machine.  She jokes that if she hooked him up to a generator, she could power all of New York.  Really, some kind of pressure stim, putting him under five blankets or putting someone on his lap or something, is the only way to get him to hold still.
19) People they’ve hurt or indirectly killed, and how it affected them
I already mentioned Michael Yew, but honestly I think Percy is...pretty haunted by the Battle of Manhattan.  He’s a leader by nature and a soldier by training and a hero by blood and none of those things make him okay with knowing how many people died on his orders.
On a slightly less morbid and more ADHD note, Percy has a mental list in excruciating detail of every single time he’s made Annabeth cry and sometimes when he’s already in a bad headspace he finds himself kind of obsessing over it.  He thinks a lot about her face while she burned his shroud.
20) What Ifs/Alternate Timelines
I described this to my girlfriend as “Big Three kids but one to the left,” soooo.
When Annabeth is twelve, she tries to go home, because her father just moved to California and all but begged her to come.  It lasts like three weeks and then she’s got her bag and her knife and a sour expression and she’s...figuring out transportation back to Long Island.  “Hitchhiking” makes it sound so dangerous.  Technically the driver of this truck doesn’t even know she’s here.  She just waits for him to stop and bails out and counts her forty-nine dollars and tries to decide what she’s going to do.  She’s already used one of her three drachma to tell Chiron she’s on her way, and really she shouldn’t use any more until she hears that they’ve sent someone to meet her, and--
And gods she’s tired.  She thinks she’s maybe in Vegas?  It’s only October, so it’s not real cold, but she’s angry with herself, for thinking it would be different with her dad, and angry with the truck driver, for stopping somewhere so glittery and confusing, and angry with the whole damn world for being like this.  She’s so angry that she doesn’t realize she’s gotten off the Strip until she practically slams into a wide gilt-glass door, which a doorman opens for her with a huge beaming smile.
“Welcome,” the doorman says warmly as Annabeth eyes him.  “We’ve been expecting you.”
Annabeth spends a few hours in the hotel’s game room, before she finds a strange boy about her own age who mentions offhand that he’s expecting his mother to come get him, after the war has settled down a bit.  They talk a little, and then the boy blinks at her, narrows his eyes, and says, “Something’s--not right here.”
Perseus--Percy, he tells her after giving her his full name, with a rueful smirk like it’s an old argument with someone else--hauls her out of the Lotus Hotel and Casino just after the winter solstice, and he has a few hours to gape around at Las Vegas before every monster in a forty mile radius descends on them.  Percy, in something of a panic, yells, and an entire graveyard bursts out of the ground.
Oh boy howdy is Olympus not amused at the sudden appearance of a son of Hades, two days after Zeus’ master bolt goes missing.
Also ft Bianca as a pine tree forming the gate to Camp Halfblood, and Thalia and her baby brother Jason, children of Poseidon, running scared from a manticore.  Thalia martyrs herself saving the quest to recover Annabeth, Bianca becomes lieutenant of the Hunters, and eventually, a kid who calls himself Nico shows up not long after Percy disappears.
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cosmicsnowcryptid · 7 years
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The Egos in Markiplier TV, and Why We Should Be Worried: A Theory
Obligatory disclaimer: This is a long ride, so buckle up and keep your arms and legs inside the vehicle at all times.
Mark was very clear that the egos who were invited to the meeting in Markiplier TV were chosen for a reason. Some of the choices seem a little... odd, though, don’t they? Wilford and Dark make sense, but Ed Edgar? Silver Shep? If you recall, Mark couldn’t even remember who Bim Trimmer was, and asked fans in a live stream if they could remember what video he was in. So it’s clearly not about fan favorites, nor is it about Mark’s favorites. It must, therefore, be about the talents and abilities of the characters, and not the characters themselves.
They each serve a very specific purpose for either Dark or Wilford. 
We know Dark and Will are the leaders here. Look at this exchange between @markiplier and @fear-is-nameless:
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Dark and Wilford are equally matched in both power and stature, but they share one common goal: control. This is what the meeting was all about in the first place. Dark says as much when addressing the problems with Will’s idea: the fundamental issue is, “how is this supposed to help us take back control?” and then, later, he says, “I think you’re missing the point of this endeavor.” These phrases indicate that the entire purpose of the meeting was to discuss the issue of control. This leads back into the original question: what was the purpose of the other egos being there, then? Why were they invited? The answer is actually quite simple:
Dark and Wilford have different ideas of what “taking back control” really means, and they each brought the most powerful associates they have to help them in regards to their own interpretations.
Take a look at the table.
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The seating arrangement here is no accident. In fact, the order is very specific: For both Dark and Will, their literal “right hand man” is the most important to them, followed by the one on the left. The second person on their right-hand side is more of an outside consultant, one that could potentially see the more niche problems that could arise in their plan. 
Dark wants control of the audience, and the way to accomplish this is through the channel. Wilford wants control of the channel, and the way to accomplish this is through the audience. 
This is why they chose vastly different types of people to bring with them. 
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Dark wants to be adored. He wants to have millions under his thumb, hanging on his every word, helpless to his influence. The channel, for him, is a means to an end. It’s just a way to get to us. The egos he brings with him are there because, collectively, he can use their skills to aid him in controlling us.
Dark’s resources focus on knowledge.
With The Host on his right and Google on his left, Dark has the ability to know the past, present, and future. This is crucial for him, as the way he gains control is by social and emotional manipulation. He already knows how to get into our heads, but recruiting these two brings him to the next level. With Google, he can learn any information he may need, and with the Host, he can know what the reaction will be when he uses that information. (This is based on the fact that the Host can narrate events faster than they happen, but does not seem to have any control over them, meaning he must simply be predicting them.)
His outside consultant is the doctor. He is not “on Dark’s side” and has no strong loyalty to one over the other, which is why he has no problem expressing his approval of Markiplier TV (nor did he have a problem with participating, as it seems he enjoyed making his little dramatic segment.). He’s there, rather, to give input on his specialty, which is the medical field. Mark has confirmed that Dark isn’t really part of our reality, but he bleeds into it, as is the case with Wilford. Now, Will has a fundamental misunderstanding of how much a person can take. He regularly kills others, but we’ve seen him express confusion and regret over this. When talking to Ethan, he explains that he was stabbing someone, and “I was laughing, and he was laughing, and then he just died.” He also mentions in the “Bubbles” segment that he is haunted by those he killed, and he’s starting to realize that “maybe it wasn’t a misunderstanding” where he was trying to “tickle them with a knife”. He clearly doesn’t have a good grasp on the effects of his actions or why they’re bad. We have every reason to believe that Dark is also unsure of the way that he physically effects others- the difference is that he is aware of his lack of knowledge, which is why the doctor is a valuable presence for him. The doctor, who has both experience with regular people and the egos, can help him toe the line between manipulation and psychological torture, keeping him from pushing his audience too far and achieving the opposite of the desired outcome. 
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Wilford really, really does not care much about the people. To him, they are the means to an end- the end being control of the channel. Wilford wants to have creative freedom and liberty. To him, the reason his endeavors keep going wrong is because other people are limiting him. We saw his frustration with his crew years ago, during his interview with Phone Guy, and it was evident again during Markiplier TV, when he argues with Kathryn and has his program interrupted by a “technical difficulties” screen. The way he sees it, these people are trying to stifle his creativity. His new tactic is to pander to the audience until he’s famous enough that he gets to call the shots. He sees no reason why this wouldn’t work- no one tries to tell George Lucas he’s wrong anymore, do they? People love him, so he gets to do what he wants. In Will’s eyes, that’s all it takes.
Wilford’s resources focus on entertainment.
His associates may not have powers as strong as Dark’s, but they know how to have a stage presence. Or, at least, Will thinks so. With Bim, he has an ally who knows how to handle non-fiction situations, like game shows (which, as we saw, he really, really needs help with.) Shep, on the other hand, can help him with a more fantastical genre. 
His outside consultant is Ed Edgar. While Will doesn’t fully understand what he’s doing wrong, he has to admit that he isn’t as great at winning over people as Dark is. Will’s foolproof thought is this: Trying to make people like him is hard. He’s basically trying to sell himself and his personality to these people. Well, who better to help him with that than someone who actually sells people for a living? Bingo! The choices he makes here really demonstrate how out of touch with reality he is. Well, how out of touch with our reality he is, I should say.
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Will’s lack of insight on the situation is made abundantly clear when we find out that he promised television spots to the people he brought with him, and didn’t deliver. This is why even those he brought are upset with his idea. The only one who seems receptive is Dr. Iplier, and only because he’s in it. Will alienates him rather quickly, however, by stealing his catchphrase. It’s safe to say that Dark, the Host, and Google were unaware of exactly what Will’s plan was, since Dark can barely control his rage, and Google mentions that he feels like they deviated from their primary objective. (Notice he says “our” primary objective and not “his”. He’s referring to the collective and not his own.)
This explains why these specific egos were chosen to attend, and why they had such strong reactions. It explains why they sat where they did and what their motivations were. And yes, that’s all well and good, but why does any of this matter?
Well, think about this for a moment: Dark’s methods are more subtle. Just like his choices in allies, his methods are more well thought out, less impulsive, more tightly controlled. Since Will wants the channel, of course he’d shine a spotlight on himself- but Dark wants the people, and to do that, he needs to stick to the shadows. As he learned when he tried to take over Mark’s date in February, it doesn’t work to simply present yourself in full. No, to win their hearts, you have to capture their minds. You have to pique their curiosity, get them interested in the mystery, toy with them. They start to hang on your every word simply to find out if it’s really you. Tell them just enough to draw them in, and keep them oblivious enough that they stay there. 
Give them a reason to believe you’re coming back. Give them a reason to believe you’re still there. Give them a reason to wonder if you ever truly left.
We don’t get to see the ending of the meeting. We don’t know what happened after the camera shut off. What we do know is this: there are two heads of the table. One of them just presented their idea.
What about the other?
What was Dark’s plan?
Did it get better reception? Good enough to be put into motion?
And if so,
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is it working?
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Dead people don’t text back.
Clara is my friend from school. I was 17 years old by then and I miss her so much. I want to tell you this story because a week ago I had a dream with her after so long and since then I feel different. Nowadays we can write things up over here. In the dream we were together as we used to, talking about school, D&D, movies and philosophy. As we were sitting by the lake, it was my chance to tell her my feelings so I finally do it: I get close to her and say "I love you Clara". My emotions are exploding, I feel my heart pounding incredibly fast until I realize she looks at me, gently caresses my cheek with her right hand, stabs my stomach with a held knife in her left hand. I slowly feel colder, staring at her asking her why but no voice coming out of me. I had been muted with a death call while she's smiling at me, jiggling and pushing harder, destroying all my hopes of living... and my hopes of staying alive. I was liking it, the idea that my life had been lost since then, and finally we could go together, somewhere. But then, all fades out except for her smile, and I can't look away, can't look away. Her smile was staring at me and I started to fear, fear so much... It felt like an eternity and I just could not get out of the dream, and all was black except for her face in front of me, smiling and watching me fall apart.
I woke up immediately after that. Sweating and crying, managed to stand up, write down the dream to not forget it and get on with my adult life. But I felt different... since yesterday I've been feeling a weird tickle within me...
She and I were really close friends, so much so that our parents knew each other: they had been somewhat close since we met in primary school. We occasionally did things together whenever she had the chance. I was of course always available for her, but she used to go out with her friends instead of going out with me and I didn't want her to do that. It was rude after what I'd done for her. However, out of all the other guys in class, she preferred to be near me, just as I had thought since the incident in the school bus when two guys were bothering her: I pushed one of them out of the window and kicked the other one out through the entrance stairs. Naturally, that suspended me from school for some days, but so it did for these two bullies. Ever since, no one else had ever bothered her especially if I was nearby.
The days after, we were talking and I told her that no one would ever be bothering her if we stayed together, because I was invincible, and it was my duty to protect her well-being. I felt this was my duty as her friend. She responded me with a timid smile. I realized she was the shy type of girl, and that she was definitely okay with that.
Our friendship long lived. And as I had mentioned, we were like peanut butter and jelly, especially the first years. We always used to hang out to the lake or to be at each other's home, even texting each other whenever it was too late to meet and talk about the usual: it seemed that we were like a couple. However, we never had a romance: I never had the courage to spit out my feelings: her silence used to defy my heart, and everything stands still whenever I was having the need of sharing to her the inexplicable. So, I always decided to keep it for a special moment.
Things changed suddenly though. I never understood why, but sometimes I used to feel resilience from everybody else towards me, particularly while being close to her. I didn't care, we didn't care. At school we would always be kinda separated from everyone else, but lately she had been joining with a group of friends I didn't know about. They seemed so rude and careless... She had been absent for some days, so I had been memorizing this speech in which I'd ask her why she'd been away from me so much, and so close to those airheads, as if they were more important than my protection. How could she forget my protection? nobody was close to her thanks to me, to my sacrifice in that school bus the year before.
I snap out and suddenly I see her in front of me, with her new "friends" behind, while we were in the cafeteria. - why are you staring at me like that? are you jealous? - she said. I stayed in silence, shocked as I could not believe the insane level of treason. I couldn't believe how she spontaneously spoke to me that way, with that tone... I had never heard her voice with that timbre, as if she was another person, another being. At some point I answer something, maybe part of my well thought speech, but I can't remember, I can't, and it hurts me so much. I want to know why everything ended up so bad, I want to know if it was my fault. I can't even remember what happened clearly, I just remember I was being constrained by three guys, as if I was some sort of monster... I also remember everybody looking at me, terrified. That really terrified me too. I felt I was like an endangered species, being threatened by humankind, so I ran away, as fast as I could. I just wanted to ask Clara why had she done that to me, why. I really wanted to, but there was no other choice but to retaliate... her well being was being compromised by those school dangers, and I had to do something about it. She didn't even realize this... but I had to be the one opening her eyes.
Some days had passed and I was suspended from school. The third day after I decided to call Clara. I had to do something as I was losing my mind. So I sneak downstairs and take the wireless phone from my parent's house, because my phone had been taken away and I call her immediately.
- Clara, is it you? - I asked. - Yes. Who is it? - Me, Ethan. I miss you. What happened? - I don't wanna talk to you, Ethan. - Why? What have I done? - Are you seriously asking me this? Ethan have you lost your mind even more? - This makes no sense, I'm coming to you. I need to know why you're being so mean to me. - Ethan... no.
As soon as we hung up, I could already feel her tears rolling down her cheeks, but not mine. Let me tell you: love is a sick thing of humans. We're quite rational, we think, but in the end things come down to desire and are dictated by some incomprehensible realizations within our minds.
I take my backpack with the board games and head right out to her house, 10 minutes walking, but I run. I arrive quite soon and I knock the door but no one answers. I feel Clara was disappearing from my life, so I started yelling at the door her name: CLARA! CLARA! and no one was ever answering me, until somebody opened the door: it was her dad. He told me I must go or else he was going to call the police. What nonsense is this? He knows CLARA is my friend, we've always been! So I push this idiot and force my entry, head upstairs. I was engulfed in a cloud of rage, I could not control myself. Clara is in her room, frightened... I tried talking to her, then hugging her, but she wasn't moving. Then I cried, and I felt the sky was falling, as I had lost the most important thing in my life: her confidence.
Apparently I was taken away that day. I then moved to an institute of advanced studies on philosophy some hours away from the city. The place is so exclusive, you don't get to go out, could you believe? You are secluded to exploit your talent as a thinker and you're paid very, very well. You also get the opportunity to meet so many great thinkers... it's a sublime environment, I really like it. Even my parents are proud of me now, before they weren't even happy with me. Maybe I was meant for this, to innovate the world with out of the box ideas alongside my colleagues, come up with unconventional solutions for the actual problems that condemn the development of humanity. In the end, not everybody can be very intelligent.
I've been living here since then, and here you have me. We have this chance to express ourselves now since some months ago. At least, to several of the researchers, me included. It's a test from some other researchers that manage the rest of us: they're considered the faculty of the institution, and sometimes they come up with these things since there are several open experiments to which all of us are subjected to in order to study the human brain superiority over the species, or so they say. In any case, it's just technicalities and I seriously understand it.
Anyway. After the dream, and since last week, she suddenly started texting me again just like before: "Hey Ethan how are you?", "wanna go out sometime?", "I miss our D&D afternoons...", "remember when we used to shatter to pieces the theories of Descartes? Really, who could believe such things".
But I don't get it. Why is she texting me after so long? Something is there telling me something's odd about this. I really wanted her to be here with me these years and now she comes to me under such circumstances? I can't leave my academia now! I have so many things to do: on top of the thinking process and development, everyday I must manage my other friends and I'm the designated opener of the cafeteria. The colleagues say that I still have some duties to do before I can be free again, which makes sense! I haven't even been able to finish my own theory of the Evil genius, and I also receive visits from my parents from time to time which is okay. Why doesn't she try visiting me instead? I really don't understand.
I go into deep introspective. There must be something I can do, right? I mean, she might be thinking that I don't want to see her again. Texting back or maybe even calling would be better, however my colleagues told me that's something so far prohibited, therefore I must wait to do so. In the meantime, I'll act normal and casually mention this event to my friend Karl.
- Hey Karl, how are you? - Ethan. It's been a while. These days you've been thinking huh?
Didn't expect that clarity from him. Apparently I've been spacing and not being myself. He is already telling me things without even intending to.
- Yeah, being in this institute sometimes makes us forget about what's around. I feel my memory fades sometimes. - That's normal, actually.
Karl has always been knowledgeable, even under dire circumstances. That's why I want to know what he thinks about these unconventional happenings.
- So Karl, you know... I've been wondering. You know this girl, Clara? the one I told you about. - yes? - Well, she's been texting me, after so long. - What? - Yeah... as if we were settled up again. I was expecting her to text me for so long! Can you believe? I need to text her back after this! I mean, and specially after that dr- - Ethan... - dream! If you'd knew about my dream, it was so scary be- - Ethan... - because she appeared out of nowhere and suddenly I was fr- - Ethan... - frozen and then all blacked out except for... - ETHAN! - what? - Ethan... Dead people don't text back.
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Resident Evil 7 biohazard Review
I have spent an awful lot of time trying to work out what the hell Resident Evil 7 (or Resident Evil 7 biohazard to give it its full, weirdly formatted name, which I will never use again) actually is. It’s obviously not an isometric tank-control game like Resi 1 to 3, but neither is it a full-on blast-fest like Resi 4 to 6. Despite what you may have thought from pre-release videos, it’s also not an Outlast-ish stealth horror game. It’s something rather unique.
The best way I can think of pigeonholing it is to say that Resident Evil 7 is what I imagine Resident Evil 1 would’ve been like had it been made today, with no preconceived notions of how the series should be. It’s routinely creepy and has more than a few jumpscares, but it’s also got a fair bit of combat. That combat never feels particularly comfortable, though, because you’re almost always low on ammo and health items, and you’ll have to do a fair bit of inventory management to make sure you’re carrying what you need yet still have room for any other goodies you might find. All of which, I think, sums up both Resident Evil 1 and Resident Evil 7 quite nicely.
Also, you collect weirdly themed keys and solve highly implausible puzzles to continue on, but I think that’s true of almost every survival horror game since Alone in the Dark. It also has a sense of humour about this: “Who builds this shit?” asks the protagonist after a ludicrous shadow puzzle – and later on, you might stumble across a building contract for that very shadow-operated door. A brief bit of levity in something that’s unrelenting gory, grotesque, and dark.
This should set the tone nicely, I think.
Key difference number one is that, while other Resi games tend to cast you as some sort of staggering badass (from world’s-greatest-rookie Leon Kennedy to Chris Redfield, the only man to have smuggled watermelons in his biceps), Resident Evil 7 puts you in the shoes of some random nobody.
Protagonist Ethan’s wife Mia disappeared, and three years later, he receives an email from her asking him to come and get her. Said email leads him to a dilapidated rural estate… and then things go more than a little wrong. Fast-forward a little way past a couple of shocking scenes, and Ethan is desperately fleeing the murderous, nigh-immortal family that live there and really want to introduce him to the horrors within.
This is probably the stuff you’ve seen, but – while the family are your fiercest foes – they’re not particularly common threats. Most of the time they only patrol set areas or will only appear during fixed encounters, and they’re not usually too hard to escape as long as you keep your wits about you. This does absolutely nothing to make Resi 7 less scary.
Well, that doesn’t look foreboding at all.
About half of the fear factor is the atmosphere. The rotting house is a seriously eerie place to explore, especially with the excellent use of shadows (I jumped at my own shadow more often than I’d like to admit) and sound design, with all sorts of ambient creaking present to freak you out when you’re exploring somewhere new. It never really made me so scared I had to pause and Alt-Tab away, but it also never left me feeling entirely content to proceed. Thankfully, there’s no battery hunting for your flashlight or anything like that. Ethan apparently knows how to buy a torch with a running time of more than two minutes.
The other half of it is the sheer discomfort the gameplay mechanics create. Finding a room containing a save point and a stockpile of ammunition would be good, if it weren’t for the deep-seated (and usually painfully accurate) sense that things are about to get a bit rough. Beating a boss should be a moment of relief, except that it usually tanks your health and ammo and means you’re going to have to limp carefully through the next section.
The Molded are your regular enemies (and the only ones you can outright kill with your weapons) but – despite their freaky looks – they stop being particularly unnerving fairly quickly.
It probably says something that, even when you’re armed to the teeth, you still never feel comfortable until pretty much the very end of the game. It doesn’t take too long before you’ve got a bevy of weapons – a shotgun, a flamethrower, a fucking grenade launcher – but you still worry about what’s around the next corner, simply because of how frail you are and how little ammo you have. Yes, you could kill that horrible oozing monster by exploding it with a flame round, but then you’ll have one less flame round for the future. Risk multiple handgun shots to the head while backing off? Maybe try some knife-to-face combat? Good luck.
Backwards movement is slow and ponderous, and in traditional Resi fashion the only in-depth indication of your health is whether the little ECG reading on your wrist (should you have it) is green, yellow, or red. All of this, again, smacks of classic Resident Evil. And no, the game will not pause when you go into your inventory to mix up a healing item.
All of that said, combat is arguably one of the game’s weakest points up until much later, when you can finally cut loose a little and wreak some havoc. The wonderfully satisfying shotguns aside, few of the weapons feel particularly effective against the regular enemies, and there’s very little feedback as to whether or not you’re doing much damage. Enemy design is also a little weak, as there are only about four different types of foe throughout the entire game, and none of them are particularly unique.
In the end, I reasoned that David Cameron had put worse things down a pig’s throat, so…
Combat isn’t regular enough to become infuriating, though, and actually looking forward to the combat would lessen the horror a little, so – while I’m not convinced this is a deliberate design choice – it turns out it works alright. Desperately pumping round after round into a seemingly implacable foe as it lurches towards you works very, very well to ratchet up the tension of every encounter, and taking on one of the Bakers with weapons is about as effective as fending off the Xenomorph in Alien: Isolation. There are many, many cases where discretion is the better part of valour.
Slightly less fitting are some of the boss battles. The initial ones are clever and manic set-piece encounters, but then things disappointingly amble towards dull bullet sponges. There are some nice ideas present in these, too, but spamming out shotgun rounds and grenade launcher blasts is far less exciting than… well, let’s not spoil too much.
I’m going to say it again, though: that sounds an awful lot like Resident Evil. Maybe not for the best reasons, but hey.
I have no idea if this “tip” is trolling or not. This popped up after a death in which I did lose my leg (and found it as an interactive item) and I did die of blood loss, but it felt a lot more like an extended death scene than anything.
But Resident Evil 7 isn’t content to merely ape its legendary predecessors and adds some devilish twists of its own, of which one of the best is the VHS system. As you explore the Baker House, you’ll come across video tapes recorded by other ill-fated visitors, and these little playable slices tend to have a strong bearing on your immediate future. Some might give you a hint on where to find a key item, but (and I’m very cautious of spoilers here) one of the game’s most beautiful and elegant brain-teasers revolves around a bit of clever thinking based on what you saw in a video. It’s the sort of puzzle I’d expect from a top-tier adventure, and does not involve sliding any bookcases or rotating any statues.
I also like that Resi 7 isn’t just a linear trek through areas, and instead offers up a hub and a fair amount of (interesting) back-tracking. Once you’ve finished the first “area” and gained access to further parts of the estate, you’ll still have left various sections of that first bit unexplored because you lack the items needed to access them. Some of these are entirely optional (and there are a lot of entirely missable secrets tucked away; rushing will leave you far less equipped than you’d think), while others are required for progression. It helps make the estate feel more like a location than a series of corridors and rooms, and I approve greatly.
Hiding from and sneaking around the Bakers – and, inevitably, getting jumpscared by the bastards – are easily the most tense moments throughout.
It’s also not a game that overstays its welcome. Depending on how much exploring you do, you can probably expect your first runthrough to be somewhere between the 6-10 hour mark. That might seem a little short, but throughout that time it doesn’t feel like it’s boring or repeating itself; it routinely offers new twists and ideas and feels fresh throughout. I’m hungry for more, but with a sense of satisfaction rather than “What, that’s it?” and I’m planning a second playthrough already.
Another thing that Resident Evil 7 handles wonderfully is in the way it ties into the larger Resident Evil mythos. It’s playable entirely as a stand-alone experience, and for most of the game it feels that way, but pay attention and you’ll see both little call-backs and the ways in which this actually slots into the rest of that fictional world. It does a damn good job of keeping most of this (and, indeed, the mystery of just what the fuck is going on) behind the curtains and merely hinted at for quite some time, though.
On a technical note, I stand by what I wrote earlier. I suffered two crashes during play, which isn’t entirely unexpected when taking lots of high-res screenshots and alt-tabbing regularly. I did also lower the shadow quality to Medium to make the framerate a little more stable, and yes, the inventory is still kind of shit on mouse and keyboard… but that aside, it works wonderfully well on PC. Some slightly rough texture work, but the overall effect is damn bloody good, and it both plays and controls wonderfully. The only thing I might take issue with is that the “use” prompts can be a little finicky, requiring you to stand in very particular places and face a very particular spot to trigger them.
But that’s all boring complain-y stuff, and while Resident Evil 7 has its issues, it’s actually better than I’d hoped. It’s tense and thrilling, varied, well-paced, and seems to be the revitalising shot in the arm the series needed. It’s far from the scariest of games I’ve played (it creeped me out, but I played it at night, for crying out loud) but it’s still a bloody good time.
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