#a love letter to myself more like

[calmbigdipper]

What you mean to me

#jojo’s bizarre adventure #vento aureo #golden wind #giorno giovanna #guido mista #giomis #ness’ art #hi this is the longest comic I’ve ever posted so far. enjoy?! #I wrote the general idea for this and the dialogue around two years ago… #but I never went through with the idea because. wow. this is too long #a couple of months ago I found my old notes and sketches of this and um #now here it is #this is my love letter to this pairing because I’ve loved them dearly ever since I finished gw #the last page was originally a separate drawing unrelated to the comic but I decided to repurpose it for the narrative #I’m used to making humorous things so it feels a little weird to make something more sincere (although there’s still a little haha funny) #I feel motivated to make more stuff like this but at the same time I don’t really want to because of all the effort necessary #but um #happy that this project got finished!!! and not abandoned in the depths of my desk!!! yay!!! #and yes I decided against adding the other page I. actually reasoned with myself for once

[dreameroftheblue]

mentally I am chewing on him like a stim toy

#ha ha ha ha I said no more crowley until I finish some commission work #well. I made enough progress. that I allowed myself a two hour fervor with which to pump these all out #just opened some pics from the ref folder and there we go #kept thinking how well crowley would suit the black/white style like that; and I believe I was correct :3c #you know how someone's art really conveys what they love #I hope my love always rings loud and clear and obvious #love letters to him and mister tennant and you lovely folk who keep putting out nice things for me to see with my own eyes. for free. muah #crowley #good omens #good omens fanart #good omens crowley #anthony j crowley #david tennant #due for some more angel practice probably too #we shall s e e

[greenerteacups]

Hi! I am an ardent fan of your writing, and I hope to be as sorted and planned as you some day in my own writing journey.

My question is: you have a keen eye when it comes to planning character personality, dynamics, and such. I've also been wading through your ask replies, and your insights into how you write people and how you make them play off of each other is so wonderful to read. If it's not too personal a q, how did you learn how to write like this? Did you go to school for writing, does it come from years of observing people, do you have reading list recs for "how to write real people and real interactions"?

Thanks! This is a really flattering question. I'll try to answer it honestly, because I wish someone had been brutally honest about this with me when I was a young writer.

I didn't go to school for writing. I started doing it when I was about nine years old. It sucked very badly. I kept writing throughout high school, and it still mostly sucked, but some of it was occasionally interesting. ("Interesting" here does not mean "good," by the way.) I took a break in college, and then came back. I've been writing ever since. Sometimes, I feel good about it. A lot of the time, I don't!

I hate giving this advice, because I remember how it feels to get it, and it's the most uninspiring, boring-ass, dog shit advice you can get, but it's also the only advice that is 100% unequivocally true: you have to write, and specifically, you have to write things that suck.

I do not mean that you should make things that suck on purpose. I mean that you have to sit down and try your absolute hardest to make something good. You have to put in the hours, the elbow grease, the blood, sweat, and tears, and then you have to read it over and accept that it just totally sucks. There is no way around this, and you should be wary of people who tell you there is. There is no trick, no rule, no book you can buy or article you can read, that will make your writing not suck. The best someone else can do is tell you what good writing looks like, and chances are, you knew that anyway — after all, you love to read. You wouldn't be trying to do this if you didn't. And anyone who says they can teach you to write so good it doesn't suck at first is either lying to you, or they have forgotten how they learned to write in the first place.

So the trick is to sit there in the miserable doldrums of Suck, write a ton, and learn to like it. Because this is the phase of your path as an artist when you find what it is you love about writing, and it cannot be the chance to make "good writing." This will be the thing that bears you through and compels you to keep going when your writing is shit, i.e., the very thing that makes you a writer in the first place. So find that, and you've got a good start.

Some people know this, but assume that perseverance as a writer is about trying to get to the point where you don't suck anymore. This is not true, and it is an actively dangerous lie to tell young writers. You are not aiming to feel like your writing doesn't suck. You are aiming to write. You are aiming to have written. Everything else is dust and rust. And of course, you'll find things you like about your pieces, you'll find things you're proud of, you'll learn to love the things you've made. But that little itch of self-criticism, in the back of your brain — the one that cringes when you read a clunky line, or thinks of a better character beat right after it's far too late to change — that's never going away. That's the Writer part of you. Read Kafka, read Dickens, read Tolstoy, you will find diary entries where they lament how absolutely fucking atrocious their writing was, and how angry they are that they can't do better. A good writer hates their sentences because they can always imagine better ones. And the ability to imagine a better sentence is what's going to make you pick up the pen again tomorrow. And the day after that. And the day after that.

Which is what I mean, and probably what all those other annoying, preachy advice-givers mean, when we say: a good writer is just someone who writes every day. It's that easy, and that hard.

#by the way a lot of this draws on ideas inspired by 'letters to a young poet' by rainer maria rilke if you're interested #that's a formative text for me as an artist #it won't teach you how to write but it will teach you how to think perhaps #and once you know how to think. well. life is just pretty good #and i can't say the writing gets easier but when life is pretty good i find myself enjoying it a lot more #this word vomit was prompted by the question 'how do you write real people and real interactions' #because that's like — i'm not trying to be pedantic but— #that's kind of just 'how do you write literature'? #because that's all literature is. what are human beings? how do you write a person? how do they interact with each other? #like shoutout to the void if you know for sure how to write real interactions then please for the love of god tell the rest of us #because i think most of all authors in history have just been giving it our best stab #'this is how the world looks for me. is it how the world looks for you?' #so my advice on that score is: try to see how the world looks for you #and then try to share it with me #don't worry about whether it looks the same for me. it won't

[junk-heart]

Suggestion I got from a moot^^

#homestuck #homestuck fanart #kanaya maryam #gamzee makara #this dude's shame globes got crushed #rip gamzee's shame globes #you will not me missed #jkjk i love the clown #but i love Kanaya more #jade blood representation lets goooo #I really outdid myself with their expressions #idk what it is about them #but yeah #the composition looks like letter H if you squint

[anaalnathrakhs]

i feel it's so fucking stupid and ungrateful but it still hurts a little when someone gifts me something i just don't like. i don't know. i know it's dumb and inaccurate to astrain that much meaning to a simple gift, but it feels kinda like they don't know me. i guess it feels like people don't see me, like a reminder that the person i reflect and the person i feel like are incredibly different.

#two fairly recent examples jump to mind #last year my class did a secret santa #the guy who got my name barely knew me so instead he asked our litterature teacher for tips #i was doing an effort to participate a lot in her classes and discuss stuff and i felt like she was an adult i could really trust #and adult who Gets It #and she picked just. the wrong gift. a classical philosophy essay. #stuff i hate reading. stuff i hate thinking about. #i said thank you to both of them and tried to read it during christmas break still. but i was right. i hated it. #and this year's christmas #recently i tried patching things up with my parents and we are a lot more communicative now #so they've opened up that my demand not to receive any gifts was painful to them #so we had an agreement: we write open-hearted letters to each other on christmas. #and they can gift me something if they'd like but no pressure if they don't find anything they feel would be a good gift #bc i myself opened up about the whole ''inaccurate gift'' thing being one of the reasons i dislike receiving stuff #and guess what. christmas comes. they got me a printed card from an artist whose work we saw at a local art thing earlier that year. #that artist does mainly either plants or nice architecture. stuff i love. #they picked the ONE work of hers that doesn't look like that. some reinterpretation of the great wave of kanagawa #a piece which i dislike with a passion for aesthetic reasons #i had promised i'd be honest if their gift missed the mark but tbh i couldn't. it's just an aesthetic thing it's completely begnin. #it's not like they spent lots or tried to pick something that was USEFUL #so i smiled and the picture is hanging with other stuff in my room #and i thanked them and i can't express how genuinely glad i am we have a better relationship #but man i felt my heart break a little under the tree in that moment #idk #i know it's silly but it makes me feel weird. and cold. #broadcasting my misery #vent

[icewindandboringhorror]

There's always a slight yearning in the back of my mind wishing I had been born in the right place, time, family situation, income level, etc. to have just lived in one single house for my entire life. Imagine being born in a place that still suits you, even through all of your personal evolutions and etc. The idea of deep familiarity with an area because you've lived and explored it for 40+ years, being encased in a web of memories and connections. Being able to clean out your old childhood bedroom and find personal artifacts, to dig in the yard and remember. I know those lives can still be plenty imperfect, but there's just something so seemingly solid and stable and Grounding about it that I sometimes wish I could have.. (At least from my outside perspective as someone who's moved around a bit geographically and even within the same area, never lives in the same house/ apartment /etc. for more than a few years usually.) Like... having a place that is printed upon, fully your own, rather than chronically a visitor, every thought of a space always tempered with the notion that one day soon you'll have to pack it all up again, etc. There's something peaceful about the permanence.

#I think also because I'm a very nostalgic person - THOUGH not in the way that somep poeple mean when they say nostalgia because I've realiz #ed that to some people apparently it means like.. more of a sad emotional thing? Or when I talk about being nostalgic they say 'me too' and #then describe how they're always depressed dwelling on the past wishing they could revisit it and replaying it and feeling sad and etc. #Whereas for me - it's not in a deep or emotional way at all. It's very detached - kind of like someone who is doing like a scientific #cataloguing of something? I don't feel any remorse or sadness or longing or sitting there sobbing for hours over people/pets I've lost or #etc. It's more like a fun contemplative excercise and extension of self analysis plus just documentation. Like I know your memory fades as #you get older OR even as stuff is actively ongoing humans have terrible recall - even the ones who are less emotional/more focused on #accuracy our minds still twist things or etc. SO I looove to have documentations of everything possible so that in the future I will have #as full and complete of a view of myself as I possibly can. sure the image will undoubtedly be a little distorted but having real evidence #of how something was at a time is very valuable. You look through old messages or letters or something and you always find other alternate #versions of yourself. Not in a worse way like inherently inferior Previous Models Of You who haven't yet been perfected but even just in a #neutral way like 'what they're saying is not a BAd thing but also is not how I would say that today.' etc. ANYWAY I find it really interest #ing to document and remember things and love revisiting the past - not in a sad way - but just like. curiosity. reminiscing and recalling #and filling in gaps. or trying to have the same feeling I felt at a previous time so I can remember what it was. Collecting information for #documentation purposes. Like for example - I would love to go back and tour all of my old childhood houses/apartments. Not to like #sit in the middleof them and cry and go 'ohhh my childhood waughhh' - but literally because I want to take detailed photographs so I #can remeber exatly what they looked like and recreate them in sims or some other digital way. Why? idk. just to gather the information. If #I ever live to like 80 years old and I'm still reflecting on my life curious about the dteails of it. I want to be able to fire up my #ancient windows 10 laptop I've kept all these years and open up the sims 4 and tour my old home with accuracy etc. ?? #Not sure why really. Maybe an extension of how I generally care a lot about having an 'accurate' view of things? Like I would rather be #accurate than be happy. I don't understand 'ignorance is bliss' because I would always rather know. I always always in any situation am mor #focused on 'what is the well researched practical truth' than about 'how does this make me feel' or etc. Truth above ALL else even if it #were to make me miserable. Aka why I'm a 'boring' 'annoying' 'UM actually..' type of killjoy lol because it's very hard for me to understan #that some people can enjoy something or have a good time even not knowing the full facts of a situation or etc. BUT anyway. since that is #some core driver of my personality for whatever reason (just the plague of ennegram type 5 perhaps lol) maybe that also drives me to my #kind of minor obsession with like 'I must have a complete view and calatoguing of my life that is as accurate as possible within the means #i have' . Is it REALLY important for me to know the exact layout of on of my first childhood bedrooms? no. materially it does nothing for m #in life. BUT hey. it would make a great addition to the Accurate Life Story Catalogue lol. ANYWAY.. But I think a lot of wanting to live in #one place forever is not just the ease of documentation. but the sense of having a constant. Much of what i crave most in life is stability #& familiarity &routine bc of how my brain works. And it just would feel so good to be Settled. Never uproot again. One little place FOREVER

[99probalos]

siddex throughout the ages ...

#cw eyestrain #tw eyestrain #70sgi #im so sorry if sids guitar looks fucked up. #but anyways HAAYYYYY #i decided that bc i overzoom a lot that im jist gonna not let myself zoom in on art anymore for like. a while. at least until i get better & #more comfortable with it. for the sake of improvement #and i'm really proud of how this came out :]] hehehe #ahhh le 70s siddex. how ive missed thee #i still love drawing normal siddex too. its just been a while since ive dipped into 70s au art #but anyways. anyways #i hope u all enjoy... :] #rlm #gorilla interrupted #siddex #dex #sid #red letter media

[bittersweetresilience]

something i haven't seen a lot of people talk about before is that commenting actually INCREASES my appreciation for a fic. i'm the kind of person who reads constantly and tag browses and is subscribed to a billion authors so i often find myself in a sort of consumption fugue state where i'm theoretically enjoying my time but really am just kind of scrolling transiently through walls of words. but commenting is taking a mental step back from that state to actually consider a fic and give myself space to feel things about it and appreciate what i love about it, picking up on small details i might have otherwise missed, sort of like a gratitude journal or mindfulness practice and we all know what the science says about that 💕

#i'm not interested in those posts that make out commenting to be some kind of moral requirement or necessary writer fuel or whatever because #in the end people should put out what they put out because they want to and work on having a healthy relationship #with whatever naturally comes out of that (this is a reminder to myself as well) #but i'm coming to realize commenting is a genuinely fun and rewarding practice for everyone involved #the reader first and foremost! it's like being back in book club #and bonus you might even get a really nice reply from the author hehe asukiess if you see this your replies made me very happy today 💘💘 #i would LOVE to hear your fic ideas or read more of your writing or send more love letters anytime!!! #ah these tags are so long. hit post #🌃

[toastytrusty]

fundamental amrev experience is being assigned the legend of sleepy hollow as required reading in your highschool english class and freaking out A. because it's by washington irving, who was discussed extensively in that one nancy isenberg essay about aaron burr's sexuality, and B. because it Won't Stop Talking About John André, who, of course, is john andré

#everyone raise a glass to john andré #reading tlsh while watching turn was actually such an experience #it's so fascinating? how much of an impact he and his death had on american culture #especially because yk. he was british. and turned benedict arnold who the average american does Not like #something soooo fascinating about arnold being demonized and andré being glorified #which i'm sure was in no small part to be arnold being entirely unpleasant to be around and andré being like #everyone's favorite guy ever #choose your fighter: #ben “i can recall no instance where my affections were so fully absorbed in any man” tallmadge #marquis “i made the mistake of allowing myself to acquire a true affection for him” de lafayette #alexander *writes a 3000 word letter to laurens about how much he loved andré* hamilton #and more #and yeah just. #the fascination that tlsh makes clear people had with him #is SO interesting to me sorry idk. that's america's favorite brit right there #also. washington irving never beating the gay allegations idk #the achilles and patroclus mention was crazy #john andré #john andre #benjamin tallmadge #ben tallmadge #marquis de lafayette #alexander hamilton #i probably should have written all that in the actual post and not in the tags but. Whatever

[m0e-ru]

HAPPY ANNIVERSARY to the day my brain was literally rewired and my gender was being changed by the second SO HERES A GAS STATION SPECIAL before this joint was even a gas station in the FIRST PLACE !!!!

FUCKING FREAK

#kommento #// theres a whole love letter in here dont open these tags it's a readmore equivalent #p4 #⛽️🌫 #moel gas station attendant #tohru adachi #boot.tingting #arttag #// sneak peak before the manager became a manager and only put the uniform on to see how well it would fit and hasnt taken it off since. #// im tearing up because i hate how it's been three years and also i cant find the other notebook so i went through gphotos instead #// also that i miss blorbo so much i miss my old self so much she was so sweet and genuine and the passion and love and everything #// STUPID SEQUENCE OF PHOTOS the way my brain was so fucking rearranged i had to get up and make memes and take screenshots and then #// draw then COME BACK AGAIN to watch the thing that changed my life forever. AGAIN #// sorry was having technical difficluties in yokohama im back istok im normal (affirmation ) #// this is literally all me before i started thinking about myself and wondering about my gender then the dysphoria came rushing in like #// some freshwater spring about to make a waterfall and i had to let it settle and get used to the ecosystem with two more years #// took a month where p4gsteam was booted up and i made my own save at some point and finished it on july 8 #// clasped my hands and had a honeymoon period over. mimi <3 then the day after rolled around and i watched the .chair car adventure #// literally my first p4 doodles were mimi and adachi theres no fucking denying it theyre the og. theyve been with me from the start #// theyre so important to me theyre so personal they made me who i am thats why im so mad with the community i have to share them with #// because theyre all so different from me and i took that personally #// IT'S KOKAY !! look at how far ive gone. this is the biggest archival effort ive ever done my entire life ive grown branches #// farther than ive done before ive put such a variety of skills to use just to make myself food and manage this damn station #// and keep some sort of love alive which was all from me and is still from ME !!! #// crying while writing these tags now sorry okyakusan i'll clean it up soon #// these doodles really explaining my mindset from the start and how the grindset has never really changed at all #// it was all friendship for three years and still will be i love adachi i love gas station attendant so much THERE I'M SAYING IT #// cherry on top friend just dm'd me to get an actual job at a gas station IM SHITTING MYSELF #// happy anniversary to my genderest best friend and the most problematic uncle ive ever had #// we're all holding hands and theyre treating me to topsicles because it's all i could ever shamelessly want

[spacedlexi]

making the prologue choices for s4twdg like "hm which assortment of horrors shall i put clem through this time?"

#me sitting there weighing options like im tasting wine #i really appreciate this feature you can make so many clems so quickly (and i do) #i love s4 so much!!! its one of those things that i just find myself loving more and more with each playthrough :') #truly just feels like a love letter to the series so many little lines here details there and overall just a great send off for clem :'') #its also visually STUNNING the music and sound design is beautiful and theres a lot of great shots and sequences UGGH so inspiring #like truly its up there as one of my top inspos no joke i cant look away that graphic style is Everything and the Colors 😭 #not me missing dialogue choices because im too busy staring at the environment and taking screenshots #it speaks #twdg

[nedlittle]

[alt]

2x21 "crisis" really is a perfect episode

#mash #i cannot BELIEVE the plot of this episode was really it's cold and we need to snuggle for warmth #the supply line got cut off so we need communal sleepovers for Morale Reasons #it's PERFECT! #i just know frank is that kid who's like 'can we please be quiet and go to sleep' #frank thinks they're gonna get in trouble if they're too loud #i'm going to finish s2 today and i really enjoyed it overall! #i think it's stronger than s1 (understandably) and the episodes have more rewatchability #however on the other hand there episodes like for want of a boot and as you were that feel like all set up and no payoff #similarly dear dad 3 didn't really feel committed to the epistolary format and didn't do anything interesting or meaningful with it #also bc i am a person who loves spoilers and context i know what happens to henry so every passing episode i am filled with dread #that's my DAD what do you MEAN he's gonna get shot down over the sea of japan!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! #also mclean stevenson is giving possibly my favourite performance. he's just Saying things by accident #not one word in his mouth has ever been there on purpose he is possessed by the spirit of your dumbest uncle #i'm still lukewarm on trapper. the vulture instinct i feel on account of him looking like buddy the elf has settled #i no longer want to tear that man to shreds out of primal rage i only wish he'd get his own plot & a more distinct personality #those are all my thoughts rn #i have to bribe myself with the Very Special Gay Episode so i can finish this cover letter #id in alt text

[impossibledial]

“Dearest Belle,

I have all the possessions for which a man may dream. My castle is spacious, I have the finest of furniture, and I possess spools of gold.

But I have no heart.

Black as it may have been, I once had it working again. No. You had it working again. It was you, and it was yours. And you took it. You took it from me — my heart. You took it and you left. You hurt me, and I hate you. I hate you. Because I love you, and you made me need you. And I don’t care that I told you to go. You’re gone! You left! You’re gone and I will never forgive. Never forgive. I wish, I wish you were dea…”

#rumbelle #rumple’s letter #skin deep #this letter solidifies why i can’t bring myself to hate them to be honest #enchanted forest rumbelle you will always be known and loved by me #or is it dark castle rumbelle #deserved more flashbacks like skin deep instead of having them reunite at the end of season 1 tbh #id like to have known what regina would’ve used belle for #idk #is good writing too much to ask

[procrastinationaccount]

I'm going to lose my fucking mind

#For context: I was going to make a post complaining about how lesbians don't have enough good musical theater duets #(like we have the love songs from 'The Color Purple' which're alright but doesn't match the passion or desperation present in the book imo #'Changing My Major' which is a great love song but doesn't hit that sweet duet spot #'Dance With You' and the last verse of 'You Happened' from The Prom are sweet but the girls barely get to actually sing about each other #Honestly 'Oh Well' from Love In Hate Nation comes closest to what I want but it ends on a bittersweet note unless you see the show live #If only Elphaba and Glinda were canon... #But anyway. I can't believe that there's an adaptation of The Color Purple coming in the year of our lord 2023 and this is #how they're talking about Shug Avery. Her *role model*. Lock up your *husbands*. Ick. Pfaff. #I mean they're going to be gay. You can't get around that. But Shug is the love of her life. Can we please talk about that in the character #Don't mind me I'm just over here overreacting #From what I've read one of the biggest adaptational changes in the musical is her reaction to Shug's affair. #Like in the book Shug is the one light in her life. I sobbed myself to sleep over her nosedive in self-worth when they took a break #In the musical she's just...fine with it? I get why that's more satisfying emotionally but I still think it undermines their relationship #I don't get the curse thing either. I'm a little fuzzier on this part but in the book doesn't she just leave him and she's able to thrive? #Then when he asks her to get back together she's able to just know that the worst with Shug or alone is better than the best with him? #This book man. I hate that there isn't an adaptation as devoted to the Celie/Shug relationship as the book is. #Hate that the only recommendation I've seen calling it a sapphic book was from someone who thought that Celie's letters were to her lover #I remember watching this steamy adaptation of a Shakespeare play in soph Eng and seething because they only kiss once in the 1985 movie #Ig I can't expect too much from 1985 but...it was in the book! It was one of the most important parts! They don't even live together in it! #This was all to say I wast a lesbian 'Green Green Dress' a lesbian 'Home' a lesbian 'Natasha & Anatole' a lesbian Legally Blonde finale #The list goes on #I'm sure The Color Purple (2023) will be a good adaptation and movie. I will not pop blood vessels while watching it. #Maybe I should just avoid press releases and the movie will surprise me in a good way.

[darabeatha]

/ GAP MOE!!

#;m.oriarty #do u do u understand- evil mastermind math professor but he is also a human with feelings of course #and like like like- he's like a peacock showing his feathers and trying to look cool and show off (bc ruler m.oriarty is into that- #extravagance in a much more 'obvious' manner compared to archer m.oriarty's showing off) #AND- he's soooo confident about his intellect and he has all that well earned pride BUT #he thinks he looks soooo cool; the type that would do something and immediately look from the corner of his eye if u were staring #OBVIOUS! #im a SUCKER for those kind of characters actually #its about the 10 stages of denial and then the x1000000 pinning like a shy victorian era gentleman writting love letters #like j.ekyll; but jekyll's kind of yearning is like #'goodness gracious i dont deserve anything good in my life and i will torment myself every time it happens' #yeah #also adding a.rjuna to that trope #a.rju m.oriarty and j.ekyll spinning around like that monkey gif

[boyfeminism]

idk sometimes i wish we used emails more because like social media messages are fine but the expected tone seems to me "omg this was really good" when sometimes the tone i want to have is "this touched me deeply" in a more ambling way. like i want to meander, i want to wax poetic, i want to give you my case without a character limit and 7 messages. ya know.

#speaking #idk i messaged someone on twitter just bc twitter is All they had n was like #hi sorry i wanted to email you and it would have been better but here we are #like what i Really want to do is write you a letter but an email is a stand in for a letter but dms are a stand in for a conversation #ya know. like what i want to say is not a conversation it is a slow letter #i know its like fun and popular to hate emails but i actually really like emailing like #the Worst part is just the overhwelming amount of ads/marketing ones you recieve but unfortunately #the same can be said about every single thing really #so in a practical sense i love emails i feel like i have an easier time expressing myself in a more formal but distant setting #and if its not necessarily a business/professional email i have more freedom to speak elaborately and like #idk Dramatically which im more inclined to do which i never really get the chance to do bc of like messaging #anyways. fingers crossed this podcast guy gets back to me idk how popular this podcast is so