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puppyeared · 5 months

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28 for the ask game !!!!! ^_^

28: do you collect anything?

send me a number!! 💌

#also very fun conversation starters!!! i like to think it helps people get to know me a little #my favorite pairs rn are my spirited away soot sprite socks and my i need to pee socks #the soot sprite socks are knitted and the material is nice and breathable. and it has a cable knit along the middle its rly cute ^_^#the i need to pee socks is like this guy on a horse and hes holding a flag that says 'i need to pee.' and at the foot it says 'again'#that one is actually one out of three blue q socks which are probably my favorite brand cause theyre so silly and good quality #the other ones say pro wrestling!! why? because!! and these wrestlers beating each other up. on the sole it has a guy #saying somebody bring me a folding chair!! and the third one says 'i am going to get shit done' and on the sole it says 'later'#id love to get more blue q socks but theyre a little hard to find around here besides ordering online #i wear different funny socks every day of the week and its fun to see peoples look of delight when i show them #ask #ask game #answered #doodles #yapping

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dykeinthedark · 1 month

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venting in tags about gender n shit (long as hell) (u can comment and talk 2 me as always :3)

#okay so i got a really masc haircut about a month ago and i know it's just a haircut but holy shit has it changed EVERYTHING for me #like.... i've always leaned masc except 1) before i came out 2) when i was actively in love with someone who i knew liked femmes #and they always described me as a fem. because that's what i showed her. because i wanted to be with her.#but lowkey whenever i'm in a not-impressing-anyone raw-dogging-life-no-crush era i always resort to a very masc style #like masc being my default and i'd only lean fem to impress people whether it's for love or peer pressure in a specific setting #like ''dressing up'' has always been a form of drag to me. like something i HAD to do to fit in or impress my parents (scott favor core)#but ever since this haircut i've realized... i could just BE masc innately like i really don't have to be womanly if i don't want to #which i usually don't. again i have only ever dressed fem for other people. but it's not even being masc that attracts me on its own #it's like. being masc in a distinctly lesbian way. as in whenever i look in the mirror i don't wanna be like a Guy i wanna be a dyke.#like lesbian as a gender identity too sort of thing honestly. okay i've been waffling but basically i sort of want to call myself butch #but i don't know if i like... can?? if i'm allowed to???#everyone always says it's MORE than just wearing boy clothes and not wearing makeup and having short hair (which i already do all those)#i mean i've always id'd as genderqueer because it literally just means gender weird and i experience gender in a queer way #what's probably the most telling is that my friends (all queer) CALL me a butch lesbian #like every time they do i feel really internally validated. it's not just my clothes but my personality too ig is what people tell me #i have a higher pitched voice relatively speaking but apparently the way i talk is quote ''very clockably into women''#which?? gender euphoria asf. my best friend specifically he (gay trans guy) always uses butch to describe me very intuitively #people have also noticed that i ''transitioned'' in all aspects except hormonally. like ppl have commented and noticed my masculinzation #but at the same time i always feel rly haunted by my ex relationships because one wanted me to be more masc #(she's the one who came out as straight and would treat me like a man) which i didn't like and i didn't like playing up being fem either #bc now it feels like she (butch) won't believe me if i called myself butch too bc she remembers me being femme #idk i feel like there's her voice in my head all the time that sees everything i do through her eyes (i'm lowkey still in love)#i feel like even though this comes so naturally to me i must be putting on a performance #even though i've actually read stone butch blues and done research into the history and i truly love and id with the culture like i rly do #that im still just a sad imitation of a butch lesbian and can never really be a part of it because i used to enjoy dressing up sometimes #like it's so stupid but can i still be butch if i wore a dress to prom and i think i looked good in it??#even though i was envious of my friends who wore suits?? that i used to try goth makeup?? that i liked long dresses??#that i enjoyed stacked necklaces and rings on every finger???#and tbh ALL OF THAT CAME FROM A CONCIOUS EFFORT TO FEMINIZE MYSELF IN JUNIOR YEAR OF HIGHSCHOOL WHEN I WAS 16 #because omfg it was 2 months before junior prom and i was worried that i was too masc and wanted to get comfortable with being fem

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ecoamerica · 1 month

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rexscanonwife · 1 month

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Grrggh...good morning everypony = w = I rewatched the episode of the ppg reboot where Utonium gets a girlfriend...

#jane journals #self insert talk #🔬 starkissed scientist 🔬#i woke up at 5 in the gah damn morning and MY HEADPHONES are gone so im gonna have to ride the bus w/o them >:[#hell on earth 10 dead 4 missing!!!#and i choose to do this before i go ajfjg #anyways this sucks #like im not bothered by love interests but this whole reboot is ass and the characters are badly written #but theres like....at least one or two cute moments where utonium is smooth with it >//<#it cant even get the FIRST THING RIGHT ABOUT HIM THO #in literally THE FIRST EPISODE he says that spiders creep him out and they basically just. not even ignore but contradict it entirely #for why? the purpose of this ep where the love interest studies spiders and turns into one ig #they could say that hes PRETENDING to like them because he likes her. but they didnt do that #ALSO why spider? why not werewolf? that would be hot #and the love interest is that bland brand of 'adorkable' thats so disingenuous #on the other hand i DO like spiders. and the way she talks to one and like treats it like a pet...yeah id do that ._.#and idk they always write utonium as way more harsh than he'd usually be especially with bubbles #he wouldnt tell her shes being SELFISH by not wanting to give away her last piece of popcorn to a spider #especially when she barely got any #maybe he'd remind her that its GOOD to be generous BUT NOT CALL HER SELFISH #but yeah....theres maybe a moment or two 😒#like when his love interest spoils a whole MOVIE for the girls and ofc theyre upset #but he holds her face and says 'everything i need to see is right here'...>//<#THAT was smooth #and idk they don't play with the idea of the girls wanting to break them up ENOUGH #they just write one fake email and its done. then spider reveal #it sucks maybe i shouldnt have started my day this way 😂😂😂#whatever hopefully work is good!!#and i always have og utoniom to think about 🥺👉👈💖💘💖💘💖💘💖💘💖💘💖💘💖💘💖💘

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astranauticus · 9 months

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a handful of chinese songs that give me big robit energy

translating cpop songs is like my second favourite hobby so it's frankly surprising I haven't made this post sooner

Him - Floruitshow (马 - 福禄寿)

I've talked about this song on here before but this is the 3.7 song for me

the second chorus is definitely MR-SN but i like to think of the first chorus (Let me take a good look at your visage as we count down the time till the curtains’ close. Forgive me for holding back my voice so soon, do you know, in your graceful escape, all I see around me is disaster?) as VR-LA during the flashback sequence

specifically 'all I see around me is disaster' because yeah not wrong

'This time I’m not here to bring you home' just kills me like the please please take care of yourself because I can't be there with you anymore of it all

'Oh spring, oh warm sun, please come sooner, grant him a smooth and safe journey' same point, just the desperate plea for the universe to protect VR-LA because he can't do it himself anymore

How can I make you stay - Floruitshow (我用什么把你留住 - 福禄寿)

(conveniently I have actually done a full translation of this song!)

definitely one of the Maxim songs of all time

"You’ve believed that you can let your life pass in numbness, but [...] why do your tears fall in the moment of letting go?' YEAH because we've seen so many times how Maxim keeps trying to convince himself that he can stop just caring but it never works

'You say don’t fall in love, yet you’re unwilling to let go' same point, this man is in such denial about how he just can't stop caring

specifically the second verse feels a lot like Maxim waiting for VR-LA to return from Tu'narath

'You stay silent, holding onto starlight as you wait through your darkest hour. Your mind is struck, when familiar murmurs pierce your ears once more' aaaAAAAHH

the bridge (?) as a conversation between VR-LA and Maxim, VR-LA inviting Maxim to see the beauty and wonders of the world ('Do you want to see the sea of flowers blooming?', very 4.5 wedding invite honestly) but Maxim's trauma just would not allow him to take that risk ('If none of them come back, then who should I live for?')

fun fact the second version of the bridge in my translation ('You must stay to see the flowers bloom' onwards) is exclusive to that live performance of the song so it's not in the spotify version i linked here. as for which version you think fits Maxim more.. well.

Borrow - Mao Buyi (借 - 毛不易)

finally banging out a translation for this song was kinda the inspiration for me to make this post actually

the tldr of this song is that it's an unnamed/unidentified speaker asking to borrow various small things for the sake of somebody else (like 'an inch of frozen sunlight' to provide warmth in a cold world) so you can probably see where i'm going with this

'A simple ‘we have plenty of time’ etched into the soul to prepare for the chance of forced separation' ouch ow okay

'Those blown apart by these winds will say that they never loved deeply' / 'There is a sincerity that cannot be blown apart by this wind' DX-TR betraying the old crew vs VR-LA fighting through so much just to get them back

'There are tears that cannot be washed away by this rain' this line just haunts me. like in general

'An acre of land for him to call home, an ordinary life for him to live' as MR-SN watching over the old crew like I can't be there for you but I hope you will find peace and a home...

#rolling with difficulty #rwd starship #rwd professionals #my feel good hobby! as opposed to art: my feel bad hobby /j #im actually learning to play how can i make you stay on the guitar right now its a lot of fun but ow my fingers #ive also found a score for him but its super outside my skill level so we'll see how that goes #bmadd11 my beloathed #/also/ working on a little something based on that song but that wont... come into play for at least the next few weeks so #its an absolute monster of a project and school has started so i dont have high hopes for getting it done soon #i dont think i got to mention this on the actual post for borrow but ive literally been spinning that song in my brain since like 2020 #genuinely. i've been thinking about how to translate that song for upwards of 3 years #grammar is just weird sometimes #i was gonna include let's go wandering by bibi zhou but i couldve SWORN i wrote a translation for that song before i just cant FIND it #spent 30 minutes hunting for the doc in my drive thats 30 minutes of my life wasted #but 'lets go wandering with a smile because we carry our home in our hearts' just fucks severely #also considered including forget your sorrows when the flowers bloom by zhou shen #bc im not gonna make a cpop post and *not* try and subject more poeple to zhou shen #but like that songs vibe is too... cottagecore to really make a good point there im just obsessed with one specific line #'If my memories are stolen and I forget all my love; I'll say to you “Hello!”#post amnesia vrla to the old crew??? the 'i dont know you. id love to get to know you again' of it all????#did this instead of my programming homework :|

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mejomonster · 6 months

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To get good at telling stories... writing stories... one must... practice by writing stories ;-;

#rant #i tell u what i think id have functioned well in a wrbnovel publishing format. but i dont think #any good sites for that exist in english as of yet? (i think theres one but its contract is Yikes i heard)#but just like. the idea of publishing chapter ever 1-2 weeks until youre done. maybe 20 chapters maube 2000. maybr you never finish.#most of the chapters free and maybe idk you make some advertizing money on ads viewed on your chapter page. or make the last couple extras #paid only idk. but the big thing? the point im getting to - sorry i got lost in the sauce -#my point is: you probably DO write shit at first. or write fine with some SHIT ARCS or rushed chapters to hit ur weekly updates #and 5 years from then youll look back and wanna overhaul some of those fucking stories (weve seen many a jjwxc writer revise later).#but wow will you have practiced writing a LOT.#youll have 100k 500k 1 million 5 million words worth of writing under your belt in a few years #and youll probably be a hell of a lot better at knowing how to make more chaptwrs on average interezsting and Building Consistently to your #main plot and arcs. you'll probably get much bettwr at raw scheduling of wriitng and pre-planning that works for you and structure mapping #youll have a much better idea of your personal strengths whrn you need to lean on them for a rough month when your story's turned #into a mess. youll value your own writing more (i hope) cause LOOK how much you fucking accomplished.#like. npss? dmbjs author? idk about others but i can definitely see the improvement in wriitng skill #between dmbj book 1 and the recent heihua book and mountain village book #(in terms of style in word choice. and goals for the story set out to be told)#i look at priest and newer novels by priest are as impressive as any literary novel ive ever analysed #(and older ones while i also love i do see their slightly rougher word choice and how some were executed a bit #more up and down/not as tightly)#i just. agh. i am :c feeling that ill probably write 200k words this year #and none of it will be as good as i want. but i NEED to write these first 200k #because the only way i get better. get to the way i want to write. is to make the progress of improvement with this first 200k.#ToT fun fact i wrote 170k words this year. WOW. and maybe 400k words of fanfic in the 4 years prior (so 100k words on average)#i know i am imptoving. i just gotta keep at it.#also? annoying i cant focus my attention lmao. 160k words is mkre than enough to finish a 1st draft novel #but me? i split those among like 20 projects this year. so the novel most written so far is still only at 40k #and im probably going to need 60k more words to finish it

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andragoras-in-vanity · 1 year

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isekai is such a popular genre right now, and its taken a clear shift from 'i got isekai'd and now im a fantasy hero!' to 'i got isekai'd and now i get to live a quiet and happy life in the countryside/as a librarian/pharmacist' and obviously a lot of it is just......someone wrote this to kill time and draw boobies, but Parallel World Pharmacy was so good???? i cried so many times, and i love the shift in tone the genre has gained with stuff like that

#Maybe because i wish for the same thing but only if my dog and two best friends can come too #but that one and grace of the gods is just devastatingly gentle #its not a power fantasy its just im tired and hurt anf i want to thrive instead of survive because our society doesnt make me happy #but someone or soemthing takes mercy and kindness on them #but that one was especially profound with regards to his sister while maintaining the control of 'end this disease with a physical punch'#and we lack that kind of control we want that kind of control over literally anything in this life #also it was so pretty #not unique but still very soft visually speaking and funny but not taking away from the content #and again the characters are kind #dont get me wrong id totally like reincarnated as a slime too but thats mostly for the non gendered shapeshifting #also dragons and i wanna befriend the orcs and wolves #but id probably end up a goblin in that one....#anyway isekai when done well is so healing even when it has almost no plot #i love intense anime but god some of the gentle and beautiful ones are all i ever need #and i crave fantasy so much i adore magic and creatures and demons so much and the softness of some of these plots #but idk that one grabbed me by the throat and slammed me into the bricks #i didnt actually like ascendance of a bookworm all that much i kond of found parts of it annoying and i didnt love the artstyle #but i did absolutely love the fact she was disabled whether they called it disability illness or magic #she was for all intents and purposes disabled in the same way i am and it was heartening to see how much love they had for her #and how good her family was ngl i cried about her father and i wish mine came even a little close to that but thats a DIFFERENT topic #dont ask me about yakuzas guide to babysitting #i dont like the realizations that one gave me #but the more that come out in this genre the better it is and the more representation will drop into it hopefully in all directions #for gender and sexuality as well as disabilities #because this subgenre is so well equipped for disabilities especially because its soft and slow and so full of love #ranking of kings isn't isekai but i think it could open door for fantasy in general too because its a light genre even when its serious #its just ...pure and light and ready to welcome hardships without trauma #the characters are always kind and the setting is new and magic affords accommodations other genres dont #magical mobility aids that dont erase the disability will always be infinitely more interesting to me than heavy machinery that #that you have to strap into but that also means finding other accommodations too like having bojji read lips instead of getting an implant

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ecoamerica · 2 months

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jesterwriting · 7 months

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I can only agree that it's very relaxing and if you do something simple where you don't have to count, then it's really nice to crochet while watching something in the background :)

The comfort character I'm working on rn is Sal Fisher from Sally Face. He's like, the only cc I have whom I feel kinda possessive over? But I guess that's because the Sally Face fandom isn't too big or active so there aren't that many fellow fans I'd encounter anyway 🤷🏻‍♂️ I almost got his arms done and I need to add the rest of the hair and then I only need to make him some clothes and he will be finished! I made his shoes and his mask already too :D

yessssss thats one of the things i love to do. put something on in the background and then go wild. thats usually what i do whenever i write. if im not writing to music, i have jerma on in the background, though i havent done that in a while. i might do that now…

ALSO OMG I KNOW SALLY FACE. i played the game a year or two ago in a single night, it was so good. i should play again sometime, i really enjoyed it. sal is such a good character to crochet a doll out of! im glad hes almost done :3 i bet hes gonna look great when youre finished!

#.jesterasks #also i get feeling possessive over ccs! it happens sometimes especially when you really really like a blorbo #i dont really get possessive personally but my qpp does and whenever we get into something together we have to divy up the ccs #like a custody arrangement #its so funny #BTW ID LOVE TO SEE THE FINISHED LITTLE GUY WHEN YOURE DONE :3

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opens-up-4-nobody · 1 year

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...

#christ. so i was selected as the top candidate for the program i interviewed with on Friday #and im very annoyed and very pleased and also annoyed that im pleased #im pleased bc it means that they were impressed with what ive done to this point and they think i communicate well. which is cool #and the project is very very cool and id love to work on it #am annoyed bc this does put pressure on me to accept bc they can only put one student forward so if i dip out then thats it for them #which i find extremely stressful. and everything is just so much more complicated if i go to the uk for a phd #and i dont get the luxury of faffing about and taking a bunch of classes like i could in the us. ugh but it would b so cool to go back to #the uk and i wouldn't have to fucking drive. ugh. this project.#ugh its like my boss said #sometimes the project is more worth it than the school. id have crazy cool opportunities to learn things on this project #but at the cost of taking a lot of classes in the us. but every project is what u make of it #but im so fucking dyslexic thst its hard to learn outside a classroom bc i cant concentrate and i dont have a person talking me thru the #info. so idk idk. hopefully when i visit the other school ill kno how i feel #god but i loved living in the uk. and i could travel so much more freely there bc the trains and all that. im so fucking restricted bc im #so terrified of driving. i dont have good reaction speed and i space out too much and i get intrusive thoughts #sigh... but id be a whole 24hrs of travel away from my family instead of the 10hrs thst i am now #so id probably only get to see them once a year maybe? in contrast to 2 or 3 times #and im just worried something terrible will happen and then ill be like fuck i wasted all my time making myself miserable so far away #idk. im so tired. we had like a mile abd a half hike out to a site one way and we left at 7.30 got back at like 4 #it was a long fucking day. and im tried. and i have no filter. and when i talk too much it really annoys me #also! i got confirmation that i fucking suck at recording data. wow im so shocked. its basically designed for me to be terrible at #but its still slightly embarrassing. like srry i fucked up ur data. i cant write words correctly #literally i kept writing my Ls upside down today. why? idk that not how i see them. my brain just cant make Language right lol #whatever. my parents r calling tomorrow and i can info dump at them abt my dyslexia knowledge and my academic knowledge of biblical history #bc instead of listening to anything useful to my job. i choose to listen to lectures on neurology and theology. bc fucking idk #its interesting im relearning my bible lore from a non religious perspective. theology is fucking fascinating. ugh anyway #i shoulf sleep im so fucking tried #unrelated

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arolesbianism · 8 months

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Bro what do you mean endori is only 4 events from the graduation event. Stop it stop it Now

#rat rambles #band posting #bro theyre on the yukiran event rn with crying ran its so jover #yall arent allowed to be catching up thats illegal #well ok saying theyre catching up is egagerating a bit but still thats so scary #I only noticed this because Ive been thinking abt yukiran again because I alas love them still and I found out thats the current event in en #bro once mygo is in en thats rly when its going to be jover #and you know if endori does succeed in catching up one day theyll be in shambles immediately afterwards #although who knows I havent been keeping up with endori so maybe its miraculously become a functional english server again #like idk endori has never been perfect but at least its almost always been more usable than ensekai lol #bro the song list ui alone is enough to make me wanna beg ensekai players to delete it #its ridiculously ugly and unprofessional and also I hate a lot of the english names for songs (~close to grey~ is the big one for me)#also just in general ensekai is incredibly ugly and unstable even by sekai standards and it has done nothing to earn my trust in any regard #like idk if you care at all abt the actual rhythm game part of it I see no reason to not get the japanese version #like I get wanting to have a convienent place to read all the stories translated (even if I do Not trust the translators)#but like even with bndori which I started and played on endori for well over a year I still ended up drifting to jpdori as my main #the massively expanded songlist and up to date events just seem impossible to give up to me if you know how to access them #like ofc I wont go yelling at ppl to play on jp servers (plus theyd make multilives Much more unbarable) idc that much lol #but still I think if you can its a good idea to make a jp account if only so you can play jp exclusive songs if you want #this applies to both sekai and bndori to be clear although Id forgive an endori player for wanting to savor the old ui while they can lol #sekais new ui is fine but bndori's is literally sooooo ugly such a massive downgrade #also while I dont hate the new art direction as much as some ppl I definitely think its worse than the old one by a lot #its so dusty now </3 #anyways I got off topic there time to stop talking

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todayisafridaynight · 11 months

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WHAT DO YOU MEAAANNN "MID" THAT COMIC GOES SO HARD AND NOT FOR ANYTHING... THAT WAS MY FIRST THOUGHT VERBATIM... THIS GOES HARD. Incredibly effective composition and symbolism and use of values and shadow on the first page ESPECIALLY (I would love to hear what the third eye symbolizes as mentioned in your tags :) ) but. But. But like. Masato being Arakawa's comfort and not recognizing it and certainly not remembering it when he's older... despite how much it means to Arakawa in the moment... owwww owwie

I was gonna ramble about how much it hits home to depict Yoko as non-human because the nightmares that have stuck with the most about my mom were like that But Enough Of That We Get It... at any rate, as always, take care and I hope you get some good news soon!

thank you so much ♪(´▽｀) !! it generally felt like somethin i dont really post (but horror/blood is something i really love and love to draw), so its why i was especially excited to share it and see what people thought: im glad people like it from what i see (❁´◡`❁) ! and im glad the lack of color wasn't anything detrimental- it might have worked better in this instance. maybe.

i dont ever 'title' things per say since i feel weird doin it BUT i guess captions serve as the title sometimes. so the caption 'matrophobia' is really ironic with that whole aspect in relation to masato being arakawa's Everything: on the one hand, it can just be a general fear of your mother, but on the other hand it could also be the fear of becoming like your mother. if i ever intended to go through with a jo variant, 'patrophobia' would for sure be the title with that ambiguity in mind, but (and i suppose in both instances) with this its more ironic here since masato is the one who ends up the most like his parents' abusers- which ultimately just makes things more bittersweet in that moment dont it (´▽｀ ;;;) on top of masato being arakawa's comfort, it's not just masato himself being the only reason: tying back into the alt. meaning of matrophobia, it's also a relief for arakawa in that he didn't turn out like his mother- which, again, makes everything so bittersweet in the end. its like spiders in my brain when it comes to that whole aspect in regards to the arakawa family's history and dynamics...... it makes me insane to be blunt ☠️

ah but yeah ! i decided to make her an actual perceivable monster so people who. DON'T. have issues with either of their parents could get a better feeling of what it is like to have a troublesome parent/s (id rather see wolves in my dreams than my mom on that note- even if they were going to bite my face off ( ´◡` ;;; ) ). i ran out of tags before i could make any more notes i had while drawing （；´x｀） but i do have more and i'll be glad to explain the missing eye bit ! under the cut since it'll just be me rambling bout symbolism ig and its gonna get long (´▽｀;;; )

when it came to the third/center eye being missing specifically, i did it in relation to how the third eye can relate to enlightenment or higher knowledge. definitely just as a result of projection, but its cause all the time when i was growing up my mom would not only assert and act as if Her Way Was The Right Way and that she knew everything, but that i should only go to her if i needed help and no one else could help me- hence it being missing being a reflection of how that notion isn't true (or always true i should say). as en extension, it's also a dig at how enlightened persons are supposed to help others reach enlightenment- yk, guide them. yet, again, in this case, they're only doing harm.

that's all for the third eye bit, but also just some other things i didnt have room to ramble bout last post: i had her lips be torn away to constantly show her fangs since. well. i dont have to explain it i guess: its just meant to highlight the never ending feeling of danger when around her (and the promise of danger). her nose being gone is purposeful too: in animals, the smell of your family's significant and it helps you find out Which One Is Yours right. in her nose being gone- again, more projection and personal problems on my part- it's a way to emphasize the separation between mother and child: 'you're no longer my kid anymore, i can't even recognize your scent'. of course, that's only to the mother: she is the only one no longer able to say they're family because she can't smell that shared scent anymore. in reality, they could very much smell the same, it's just the mother's unwilling to accept that anymore.

i know i mentioned the flowers in my initial post, but her wearing a flower shirt really was convenient since it allowed me to add those thorns and vines. when you have a troublesome parent like that, the feeling of not just being trapped is there, but it's painful- it's not something you can deal with quietly. even if you're not interacting with the parent directly, the thought of their presence or the unfortunate thoughts that come about as a result of having been around them so long are a constant thorn in the side. if i may make a pun ( ´uゝ` )

alright NOW i think i've covered everything i wanted to. without all the symbolism aside, i hope she at least looks grotesque for people to enjoy without the added thought- and i hope i didn't overdue it. in any case im glad you enjoyed it !! i hope you'll enjoy the next comic i get out (❁´◡`❁) if i ever start it and i dont abandon it midway through ( ❁´◡`❁ ;;;)

#long post #snap chats #every day i think of the nice tags someone left about how they really love analyzing my comics so ive tried to put more effort into them #im glad its payin off ♪(´▽｀) i hope ♪(´▽｀;;; )#ALSO OOPS I RAMBLED VERY LONG #my sister told me to go to therapy but therapy's expensive and i already know what my problem is so this is close enough ig LMAO #in that sorry for turning you into my therapist（＞人＜；）it wont happen again. ill still complain bout my life tho LMAO just not so directly #did i have anything else i want to add..... ill think over it carefully this time unlike last time so i dont type an essay again #OH I REMEMBERED buddhism is. crucial to me #its always weird to refer to buddhism as a religion imo and i dont like to label myself anyhow so i wont confidently say im buddhist #plus id feel ashamed for calling myself one when im such a sporadic person ☠️☠️#but ive followed it for years and i turn to it whenever im in especial peril and i generally keep it in mind when. Existing #so thats an extra personal reason for the third eye bit #alright NOW im done speaking (*￣▽￣*) now lets see if i actually draw today ☠️☠️#i hope i get good news soon.. if not this ask was definitely lovely to get so i'll be fine i think- so thank you again for writing ! (❁´◡`❁

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milf-harrington · 2 years

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me batting my eyes and twirling my hair while sending my cousin(20) the most passive aggressive text message regarding my birthday

#she hasnt said if shes coming yet or not #and on its own its not really enough to make me grouchy BUT there's also been tension between her snd my sister lately #and i am so goddamn loyal to my sister that like. my cousin is on Thin Ice already and she hasnt even done anything to me #but theres a chance that shes not gonna be there for my birthday bc she'll be waiting for something better to do #so im like *cracks knuckles* 'hey just checking that youre gonna be there bc id love to see you <3'#i sent my sister the draft but she took too long to respond so i just sent it AND THEN she goes 'mm maybe try this instead'#and i was like *sips drink* 'too late' and she just laughed akdjs #i always send my sister the drafts of my more important messages bc i dont always notice when im being rude about something sjdjsjdj #captain speaks

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smrookie · 2 years

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i think i change my mind on richard siken's crush

#the first time i read it i called it beautiful but like mostly incoherent and incohesive #i reread some bits today and maybe its bc i havent gotten the change to pick apart poetry in a fun way in too long but. actually #i appreciate it more noq #now #also i think his poetry is best when its read aloud. i found some channels on youtube that do that and they all have like under 1k views #but r so well done!!!!#anyway. sorry to mr siken i get what u r trying to say purely based on vibes #i wish i could know what was actually going on in his mind but i think theres fun in never rly knowing #you are jeff is a personal favourite now #actually i'll talk some more: i think i said this last time but the recurring motif is violence and love always coming together is rly #special #bc its not just shallow violence sometimes its gore and its uncomfortable but u rly. Get It #hani pretentious hipster side is coming out but.... i wish i got to pick apart poems like these in school #the ones at school r also great but usually its stuff thats more easy to write essays abt LOL i mean im glad #if little beasts came out for a levels i think id piss myself #anyway. i also read a lot of quora posts to see what other ppl thought. soooo cool how one thing can be interpreted so differently

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sundewa · 2 years

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Hey, I wanted to ask if I could make a skin based off of your watcher Joe design? :D

that would be so cool omg :o hell yeah!!!!

#i do not have a tag for asks but leaving the tags empty seems a bit sad. hello there. hope ur havin a great day #ALSO!! omg id love to see it when its done (absolutely no pressure though!!)

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this-doesnt-endd · 2 months

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I used to have a really giant family like tons of tias and tios and cousins and i say used to cause like it seems like after my grandparents died on both sides both families seemed to never speak again and i had no chance to even try and keep hold of those ties i was in elementary school watching my parents marriage crash and burn in real time dealing with major death in the family and then subsequent family abandoning me at the tender age of 11. Hell my brothers were older and jumped ship it was just me and the horrors

#my moms dad and my dads mom were like the heads of their families and they both died really close to each other #but my grandma and a tio on my moms side died within 3 days of each other after being in hospice literally 3 doors away from each other #for months and my parents both took the roles of like taking care of everything and being the descision makers cause no one else would #which im sure was super traumatizing in everyway possible but their siblings both seemed to resent them in ways #when they didnt want to be those people but had to be and they arent even the oldest siblings they are both like 3rd youngest #but like it just ruined the families and me and mom and my dad were all at the hospital or hospice center for months #we were there every day and night i remember it so much i can get anywhere in any hospital in my town using the stairwells #like i knew them that well #it also likely ruined my parents marriage which was bumpy before the intense major tragedy #which like yaknow what fair it was a lot to deal with ontop of like trying to crawl ur way out of the recession #but after all was said and done i talk to no one on my dads side i bearly talk to my older brother #and i talk to like my nina and two tias on my moms side and occassionally a few cousins #when theyre arent being fucking insane and unhinged #idk i loved having a huge family the like going to 5 houses on christmas type #going to birthdays or weddings and seeing everyone taking at least 45 mins to say bye to everyone #and now its gone and i wont ever get it back #and its by no fault of my own cause i was literally 11 and every adult decided i was gonna pay the price too #like i think abt when i get married its not gonna be what i thought itd be or when i get my first movie in theatres #im not gonna have the major family celebration ill have all my friends which im so greafull for #but its not the same yaknow #and id love to have that relatiomship with my family again but like where do u start when its been over 10+ years #like they remember 11 year old me if they remember me #and thats part of the problem #like on my moms side specifically i have some family who acts like theyve never met me before when i used to see them every weekend #and it was a major failing on my part as an 11 year old for not keeping in touch even tho we did my mom calls everyone and she tried #but people didnt want to return it #and as for my dads side its the same and if it was a moral failing for me as an 11 yr old to not reach out and they didnt like my mom much #my grandma fucking loved her but the rest of the family didnt and like i lived w my mom and was fucking 11 i couldnt go anhwhere by myself #and i didnt like not being places without a parent and i hated sleepovers i refused and they took it so personal #and they stopped talking to my dad and bad mouthed him and still do nd ill never allow that around me my dad isnt perfect but hes a good man

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steampunkedparm · 7 months

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i really need to get better at setting boundariessss

#and maybe also stop getting excited and word vomiting on Instagram about certain things #but i just. fuck. i wish my friend would stop. i dont want to say encroaching but yk. assuming things when it comes to plans?#its not that i dont enjoy spending time with her #but me paragrpahing about potential things i want to do if im able to go on this school trip (moreso the after the school trip) isn't an #immediate hey you should do this thing with me #because travel can be Fairly cheap from place to place in Europe (or so my professor has told me) i think itd be kinda cool to go to #scotland after we're done with the school trip in england #and my friend just kinda. made something im excited for. about her bemoaning how her parents probably wouldn't let her join me #in scotland (i. didn't invite her to join me to potentially go to scotland.)#and like!! who knows if i can even do that!! i would love to go there!! because apparently my family is oart scottish or smt! but also!!#its fucken scotland lmao. i mainly want to just chill by myself in a place i may never go to and take a bunch if pictures for my mom while #im there (and get yarn for her to lol. i think id win favourite child with that one /hj)#so i dunno it just feels. weird that she'd assume something like that i guess??? i feel weird and a little uncomfortable :(#i love my friend dearly don't get me wrong but her immediate jump into assuming I'd want someone to come with me.#on plans ive only just started thinking about. and just #blargh. shes also been wishy washy with bigger plans and i can just. see her cancelling on me last minute if for some reason i do agree to #her comin with #which!! agaun!! this is just an idea!#i hate this

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mejomonster · 1 year

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Justice in the dark, I'm begging u come back ;-; if youku won't share any info on wtf is going on then I'm asking u to return without notice ToT just asap please for Me

#justice in the dark #rant #lol feel free to ignore #i just. i ALSO wouldnt mind another danmei show airing #to see if its allowed period or if it gets stoppwd too and thats what jitd did #cause like. im still super annoyed youku didnt give info #if its a danmei issue then! just say its on unknown hiatus youku!#if its just the usage of a photo kpop thing then SAY its in editing and will resume airing once done!#if its about fitting into airing schedule then SAY WHEN U THINK AIRING SCHEDUKE CAN FIT IT AGAIN #agh.#on a personal note tho i had a bad time and tje universe should be nice to me by giving me the other 22 episodes i think #that or giving me 2ha drama. but im gonna be real i love modu more #so id prefer to just have all of jitd asap. thanks ToT

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