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thesingingrevolution · 2 years

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today has not been daebak 🤙🏻

*rant*

ok so for a while now ive been trying to convince myself that id be fine not going to the bts concert today/this week (whatever), but today im realize that is definitely not the case lmao

ive been so busy this semester and tbh since i only became an army this year i only had a few weeks to truly be able to enjoy them without the crushing pressure from school and college apps.

literally the week butter dropped was the week i had almost all my ap exams. the best bangtan experience ive had was definitely when ptd was released cause i liked them enough to be seriously invested and i also had a few weeks left of vacation so i could afford to cry over the sope scene on twitter and on tiktok until 4am.

when the news dropped about the ptd on stage concerts i was quite surprised tbh, i didnt expect them to have a concert so soon (in relationship to the announcement date and just a short while after surely canceling their postponed 2020 tour) and in california of all places. but cool, genuinely happy for them

i followed the bloodbath that was ticket sales and was like "ooooh i cant put myself through that now, look at the stress im under already" and im probably not even gonna be in country then. well. its november 27th, Year of Our Lord two thousand twenty one and im sitting in nyc working on college essays i should have finished by tuesday. isnt that nice. i could have just tried hard to get tickets, finished my work early, enjoyed my thanksgiving, flown to california, seen bts, sent in my applications, finish the school year stress free, see my friend's show, spend Christmas happily and have a good time with my family cause its technically the last holiday season ill have living with them. like yea im getting ahead of myself, but thats what i feel will happen. im so unmotivated in general but especially after sending in my early college apps, i honestly think i have a good shot at most schools ive already applied to but gg. this sucks. i wish i could manage my time better. this rant went off track ugh.

the thing is, technically ive "seen" bts (someday i might talk about what i mean) but i would do anything to see them now and i feel bad cause realistically i could have gone to these concerts and its my own stupidity and disorganization that have made me upset. i feel so bad and im crying over yoongi for days now cause i have serious issues i should work on too. im literally an adult and so embarrasing. im lost, lonely, overworked and at my breaking point™️. i cant stop procrastinating even with my mom on my case. imagine when im at college and all alone? its gonna be a disaster. im genuinely concerned for myself. i love my mom but im just realizing one of the reasons i also cant see bangtan is cause im too much of a baby i am and i cant just tell her im a fan of them and have been for several months now. just cause fear of judgement or whatever. im so sick of myself. my brother makes out with his gf in our living room and i cant tell my own mom i like a boyband. wth is wrong with me.

my plan of action now is to get into college cause ive worked so hard for it, get my life together, work out my personal issues, go to a spa cause im losing my mind and need a break, tell my mom i love bts and wanna marry yoongi (my therapist knows we are working on getting over this together), use my new bank account (since im an adult *cries*) to pay for expensive tickets and go broke but at least feel happy doing it. and probably have to pay for my cousin to come with since she 1) loves concerts, 2) loves taehyung even though she knows 3 bts songs, 3) invited and PAID!!!! for me to go to harry styles with her. and i would love to have here there. like even if i told my parents its weird like my dad probably wouldnt approve of their fashion choices alone HAHSHSHSH and it would bee uncomfortable explaining some of their dance moves ~-~

but anyway. i hope to eat soon i havent eaten in eight hours. i hope to finish my essays for at least one college tonight. i hope all armys going to see bts today/this week have a gr8 time pls post pics on twitter. i feel dumb as heck for writing this instead of my essays but it feels good. im praying to get into college. stay safe and healthy, invisible audience. bless up

#the feminine urge to capitalize the is #after so much formal writing it's second nature hhahahaha #BTS - UGH!#im so tired #at this point im not gonna celebrate getting into college im gonna celebrate being done with work #also my fear of judgement is not unfounded #ive been judged so much for my interests before #one of the reasons this blog is kind of a safe haven #rant #i finished writing this at 21:12 #if you know me. no u dont #sad girl hours #everybody say no

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an-animagoose · 3 years

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Abel info dump 2 me about ur ocs challenge

alright its 12am and i dont expect this to make sense, read at your own risk but heres a bullshit couple paragraphs on ashley underwood,

this is mostly ash because i think about her the most and this will make no sense because i haven't talked about her in literal months. ash is very complicated to me because i messed a lot with her characterization for a while and i still do, and i constantly wonder if I'm just shoving her into something convenient and stereotypical and therefore lessening her value, and then i decided that shes not real and i can make characters that don't make sense to anyone else but myself and i no longer also have to watch someone else take away pieces from her while i sit silently confused and hurt like i did before. anyway, she's very special to me because i put myself in her in a lot of small ways because she was the first oc i properly created. i made her originally for a fantasy storyline i was doing with some friends, and i thought she was very cool because she could do magic (doctor strange-esque, im not original) and then i gave her some trauma because its the next logical step. now i mostly think of her in all the modern aus that were created, and a lot of its with her old love interest (they had a very cool dynamic, sometimes childhood best friends to lovers, both with no idea how to be functional members of society, but i dont know if I'm like legally allowed to discuss them anymore so if i mention it once or twice my bad i just like knowing how my ocs act in relationships). i don't really know how I'm supposed to write things so I'm just going to put some general information and then ramble for a billion words cool sorry

general things!! shes a disaster bisexual whos 5′8″ and surviving on coffee and spite, she has freckles and tan skin (half Spanish on her mom's side- speaking of her parents died when she was 10 either in a car accident or a murder I didn't make my mind up) very curly brown hair and worrying bags under her eyes. she can look intimidating at first because she has one of those resting bitch faces and a dislike of being alive (there's a little bit of mental illness as a treat) also I'm really tired writing this I'm so sorry

she's an English major- she loves books, spent most her teenage years with her nose in one because it was easier than talking to people and also they're Fucking Good, she has shelves filled with them and two copies of her favourites so she can fill one with notes and annotations and she cries is she ever accidentally ruins one, she never sleeps when she should, staying up till the early morning and then napping at every chance she gets (she has fallen asleep on all of her friends so often, and never makes it through the second hour of the movie unless it's important), she starfishes when she sleeps and is a nightmare to wake up because she will tell you rather impolitely to “leave her the fuck alone” (getting out of bed means dealing with the world and it's so tiring to do it over and over), she’s constantly cold, wrapped up in sweaters and if she's comfortable enough, clings to the closets human heater. speaking of, it takes her a while to warm up to people, used to absolutely shut herself off from getting close to people in fear of them leaving before going to ~therapy~. she gets top grades in school because she works until shes burnt out and puts an overwhelming amount of pressure on herself, breaks down when she cant understand something in the first few tries because it feels like a failure, she does debate and writes poems and lyrics in beat up notebooks, hides them when people come over and owns like 3 guitars, sings unreasonably well and has scarily specific playlists, has round glasses she only wears when she has to because she cant see shit far away, catches colds often, brushes them off till shes forced into a bed, she studies the stars because theyre beautiful and unattainable and reads psychology books and likes true crime but only when theres a satisfying ending, she shows love through acts of service and physical touch, likes receiving quality time and words of affirmation, she takes polaroids of all her friends and sticks a bunch to her wall so she can stare at them and know that things are worth it now, has posters and art to remind herself of the little joys in life, will fight you about the star wars movies, overly competitive in a lot of things (mario-kart is a dangerous fucking game), curses a lot, stress bakes and cries when something goes slightly wrong, accidentally collects a following on tiktok from shitposting at 4am and having a nice aesthetic (and being pretty), would be the mysterious girl who you see/works at the bookstore/coffee-shop and fall a little bit in love with, writes essays last minute due to chronic procrastination and still aces it, is a ravenclaw, would be a child of hades in the pjo universe, would play outside hitter in volleyball (yes there was a haikyuu au), would be bassist in a band. i think this is all i can think of tonight because my eyes hurt but feel free to ask questions/ say anything honestly i really missed talking about my ocs and i have: many more that i will also talk about if anyone wants me to, (please. my inbox is so open please tell me abt ur ocs too i think its so fun)

#ok tagging this now bc tumblr fucking broke immediately after i tried posting this #heres ash! it doesnt make loads of sense but its not 12 56 and this is a lot of words #im sorry for the bad formatting and stuff i kinda just wrote what came to mind and can make another version of this another time #fr please skmeone ask me about these mfs i #i gots lizzy n cece n chris and characters ive barely explored n m too tired to but mayhaos #anyway yeah <3 #writing #oc #original character

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awkwardhumann · 3 years

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I need you to know I just got fucking vibe checked by your music uquiz I got Chronic Procrastinator I'm taking this quiz at 4AM putting off sleep and an assignment due monday night and a midterm i have on tuesday but rest assured I will now be going to bed solely bc of this quiz and because as you said, i need to grow up just a little bit ♡

first of all thank you for telling me u liked the quiz this will be enough validation for me to feed on for the rest of the day. second of all its literally 4am for me and i have a midterm and essay due in 9hrs so we are in the same boat my friend ✨❤️❤️. yes i also need to grow up. or at least get off tumblr and do schoolwork.

#asks #anon

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casisonabender · 6 years

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10 facts about myself

So @laifis has tagged me in this like a month ago and I’m so bad i’m only doing it now what is my life. Thanks for tagging me!

this is gonna sound so lame but here we go

I am the worst procrastinator ever. Hence me doing this so late. I hate this about myself, because although I have so much anxiety I could die, I always end up doing things at the last moment or just delaying them forever. It’s the reason I cry when I have to write essays two days before they’re due or why i still don’t have a driving license.

I looove cooking! Okay this may sound weird but in the last few years I started to cook more and more and I love cooking and finding new recipes to try; nevermind the fact that I always cut and/or burn myself when I cook.

I love foreign languages I’m a Foreign Languages Major, duh. Nothing is more satisfying to me than hearing a person talk in another language and being able to understand them.Ugh, I wish I could learn all the languages, but hey I already know 5, not that bad.

I have some weird ass dreams all the time, but my most favorite dreams are the one where I’m able to dream about the things I love. Favorite band? I dream about being BFFs with them. Favorite actors? I dream about them cooking pancakes, shirtless, in my kitcken. Favorite anime characters? I bring them to life bitch, and they’re having a convention in my room.

Okay this is weird but i’m such a contradicting person. I literally can’t decide between things, I just can’t. If I have to make a big decision I have to make a pros and cons list because I simply cannot choose. I’m a WALKING CONTRADICTION (okay sorry) because sometimes I like doing something and another times I do the complete opposite of it. *insert Oprah ‘so what is the truth?” gif here*

I’m a mom friend. Yeah i’m in the mom squad, i’m such a mother hen with all my friends, I don’t know why, I hope they don’t hate me for it LOL

I’ve been a fan of ruck music since I was a kid. One of my oldest memory is jumping on the couch while the video of Green Day’s Minority was on tv. The first English song I’ve ever learned is Don’t Look Back in Anger by Oasis. I’ve loved rock music for so long and I’m so glad I’m able to see my favorite bands live in concert.

I am obsessed with fanfictions. No, literally. I have an unhealthy need to read fanfiction 24/7, I don’t think I could go more than a day without reading one. I love reading about my otps, even more when I join new fandom and I have new material to read. Of course I love books but since I spend so many hours on the computer I read a lot more fanfictions. They are so beautiful and I feel blessed everyday, especially when I find one good enough to keep me up reading until 4am drowning in my tears.

I’m a low key kleptomaniac sometimes. Okay I don’t mean I go around shoplifting and such, it’s just that when I find something unattended and alone on the ground or on a desk I have the desire to grab it. I found one of my favorite pens in the courtyard in my uni LOL. Also you know those toiletries they always leave you in your hotel room? Yeah, I always take those home with me.

I wanna name my children after my favorite fictional characters. Sooo, last but not least. I’ve always liked the name Dean and after I started watching Supernatural I was pretty much done. And I also know I want to name my future son Shouyou after my favorite sunshine boy Hinata Shouyou, hope he’ll bring some sunshine in my life. why am i so emo

So here’s that! Thank you again to @laifis for tagging me and sorry i’m so late!!

I’m gonna tag @yeah-sure-its-me @shouyou10 @haru-shihoudani @pwrandcntrl @noblefloweroll and @cupofkoushi it’s just for science y’all don’t have to do it if you don’t want to LMAO

#tagged #tag game #text #personal #what is my life #i'm sorry

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vicetaes · 6 years

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okay sooo everyone always asks questions about the au (which makes sense lol) but im gonna switch things up a bit and ask you a really hard question: why do you ship yoonmin? and like, when did you get into bts and after how long you started shipping ym? 👀 i’m sorry i ended up asking you three things, hope you don’t mind! and thank you so much for everything, i love your au and your personality xx

hello! okay so +here’s how I got into shipping yoonmin and becoming a hardcore yoonmin enthusiast! also surprisingly, I started stanning bts like after the BBMAs! I have a friend who’s really into kpop and stuff so I was kind of aware of groups but didn’t know who and honestly I remember being so gobsmacked that seventeen had thirteen members cause I used to struggle with one direction’s 5 members at one point. so I had a general gist and a few years ago I heard snsd’s oh and 2ne1 try to follow me which I really liked but you know how you sometimes you just listen to music and that’s it, that’s how it was. never got into kpop but I was interested by it and knew some familiar faces.

then came the bbma’s and obviously they were trending on twitter and it was during exam season and instead of studying and revising for my exams, I was on twitter and saw one of the viral tweets about jin. everyone was like who’s the third guy from the left and I was like hold up, who is the third guy from the left? so I searched them on youtube and listened to blood sweat and tears. I was hooked. I listened to that same song like 50 times in the course of 2 weeks. fast forward half way through my exams, I was over at one of my friends and we were all drunk and browsing youtube. one of my friends is like guys have you heard of this kpop group and my drunken self is like UM YES? but she actually meant super junior and she showed us this video and we were all too smashed to know what we were doing so I was like ladies settle down, let me introduce you to my some amaing guys BTS. so I play blood sweat and tears and someone falls asleep, someone’s arguing with dominoes on the phone, another in the bathroom puking everywhere, but I was still dancing to bst alone. maybe its cause I was drunk, but I remember watching the music video and crying cause I was so into them?? I was like I’m going to protect you boys!!!!!!

you know when you should be revising for your very important exams but instead you go to extreme lengths and procrastinate instead? that was me. I realised I’d listened to bst 1000 times already so I clicked on the suggestions and heard save me, fire (which sounded so familiar like I had heard it before which looking back, I probably had), not today, I even went way back and listened to we are bulletproof part 2. I loved the lyrics to their songs so much. then I watched their dance practice for bst then watched people reacting to it and cause I wanted to see my friends reacting to it, I played it at breakfast the next day literally to my entire hall just to see their reactions. I think I really got into it when I watched the fanmade english speaking compilations and taehyung was so freaking cute. then I obviously had to find out where each video in the compilation was from and then I was watching hustle life and rookie king and all their appearances on variety shows. then I discovered bangtan bombs and vlive. that was it for me. I had an exam the next day but instead I was going to watch RM’s recent vlive.

exams finish but my obsession had only just began. I did some research and found out that their festa was soon then I set an alarm and watched it. live. that’s when I realised I was in too deep. cause I was watching 7 men who I still didn’t know 100% who was who speaking a language I didn’t have experience with. during the summer, my obsession with them tripled. I had more time to waste so even when I was on holiday, my mind was still on bts. I think the fact that there was so much content of them online is what ultimately did it. you’re like okay let me just watch this bangtan bomb, then you’re on a random compilation, a shipping video, on vlive, watching their dance practices. it’s neverending. the good news is that a year ago, I didn’t know who these guys were and neither did my friends but now, every single one of my friend is a fan. I have successfully converted several dozen people and that might be my proudest achievement. every time we do pre drinks, someone willingly puts bts on (mic drop remixis the most played noawdays). my housemates love them and even my mum thinks RM is attractive. AND ALL because someone retweeted a tweet about jin onto my timeline.

when it was revealed that they would perform at the amas, do you know how many texts and calls I got that day? my friends who didn’t know their names were letting me know about the news. and when they were doing their interviews? every single groupchat I was in during the AMA promotion period was 90% bangtan. ‘the blonde one is so precious’ ‘whichever one fell when the fruit hit the glass is my new favourite’ ‘THEY’RE EVERYWHERE’ and my favourite ever, when one of my housemates sent me a random text at 4am, even though her room is right next to mine, saying ‘V is my bias but RM can get whatever he wants’

it’s really weird that I became a fan literally earlier this year because it feels everyone I meet has been a fan since debut. so there’s so much I missed and honestly getting into bts and just kpop was such a trip. I would watch bts performances and it would always say ‘comeback special’ or something and I was like ‘WHERE DID THEY GO?’ so many terms I had to learn. I also tried to listen to other groups too cause I assumed they’d all be like bts but I couldn’t get into any as hard as I did for bts. nowadays there are other groups I listen to and really like but these guys have a special place in my heart.

this was really long omg I’m so sorry I’m lowkey making this long cause I know my inbox is filled with angry readers right now sjlkjdsksj

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lizlemonlacroix · 5 years

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I climb a lot of stairs

Friday, Funday?

I'm sticking to this- so far.

Remember how I said I'd write again this week?

BOOM, here I am.

Not entirely sure how substantial this will be, however.

So, just to get this going, how about I list what I've accomplished so far today? Eh? Yeah?

You're thrilled.

After a decent night's rest, I attempted to roll over about 4am when I realized I couldn't because of the cat wedged between my legs. After pushing him off, forcefully, and waiting for my alarm to go off about 6:45, I actually got out of bed and went about my morning routine as such:

Struggle to load the keurig for coffee, brew said cup

Carefully walk down all the stairs to let the dog out, without tripping on either Proxy or Stanley (who's still annoyed at me for kicking him off the bed before sunrise)

Carefully climb all the stairs to start sipping said coffee cup

Shake out dog kibble in her "slow feeder" pink bowl, mix her Prozac pills into some peanut butter, ponder the long-time usage and its effect on my dog's overall health

Skim all the headlines, while listening to the exact same headlines on GMA from some anchor I'm ignoring unless it's Michael Strahan

Exchange brief conversation as husband goes about his morning, prepping for class and filling his shiny, brand new 20z coffee mug with multiple kpods (it's good I buy them in bulk)

Kiss goodbye

Ignore Proxy as she whines to me literally seconds after inhaling her food, damn you slow feeder bowl.

Finish coffee

Climb more stairs

Get dressed for a cooler than usual morning run, after walking Proxy of course

Force myself to warm up by pushing my running intervals, sprint a few bits, drag dog along, repeat for about 20 minutes or so.

Come home to inhale fried eggs over spinach (forgot to make bread this week, oops), sip more coffee, and clean up for my looming physical therapy session

We're up to 11am guys!

Physical therapy was fine, nothing unexpected or worse than usual. It was my final evaluation day, huzzah! I've improved across the board EXCEPT for my inner thigh strength, for both legs.

I figure the "weakness" (my thighs are fine, it's just that I'm a 3 instead of a 4 on a 4+ scale) is from me no longer riding horses. A pretty large part of my former exercise regimen primarily existed so I could ride my absolute best in dressage and over fences. And when I was holding myself up with 1200lbs between my legs, 5x a week, I bet my thighs were topping strength charts.

I'm not sweatin' it though; I passed along the notes to my personal trainer and she'll tweak things as needed.

Oh, also- Interlude, soap box, whatever- Gym memberships are great for people who are already in a routine, have goals and have the know-how to reach them; I see home gyms the same way (and prefer them, now) BUT if you're just now beginning a fitness journey, I HIGHLY recommend working one-on-one with someone who can help you realize goals, chart a course and get you there! Also, if working-out isn't fun, then you're not going to do it. Sharing those kinds of feelings with a personal trainer will help you figure out a program that works best for you mentally and physically.

Interlude over, because if I don't stop I'll end up spiraling down this tunnel for hours on how I feel about personal health

Fast Forward to me rushing through Wegmans, checking off shopping list items in the Cozi app (GET THIS APP GUYS)

Yes, I ate my spicy tuna roll in the car before I left the parking deck, even though I swore no food would ever be eaten in my new car. Husband was right, per usual.

Drove around, finished a couple other errands and somehow ended up at home after 3PM, where the heck did my day go?

Flew through some other items on my to-do-list, prepped our pizza dinner and here I am.

Writing to whoever finds this.

That's not weird, right?

I'm sure there's plenty I've left out about this oh-so-exciting-Friday, but I should go ahead and switch to photojournalist mode as I finalize a few job applications and website updates.

My writing away here was mostly a procrastination tactic but I'm leaning on the promise that I made a few days ago to make another post this afternoon to justify our time together.

Have a wonderful weekend!

More TK

#writing #blog #post #writing is my therapy #trying this again

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