#also john my beloved youre so bitches

[karkatbug]

hs2 update has me giddy

#terezi's outfit is sooooooo cute i adore it #i love her sm #i love her ult!dirk hater era too go off queen #also john my beloved youre so bitches #(rip candy callie-jade davebot and aradia what are u gonna do) #anyways hey i love hs2 so much #im so happy i cant believe it #homestuck #my art #terezi pyrope #sollux captor #john egbert #hs2 #hsfanart

[m1ssunderstanding]

Understanding Lennon McCartney Rewatch Part 3.2

The thing is Paul just physically can't say what he feels. It's just an impossibility for him. So if he says reading a negative article about himself “doesn't help” or “it's not good” but it “doesn't get home” I just assume he means ‘It hurts, but I can't think about that too hard or I'll go into a self-hate suicidal spiral again’. 

I always love how Paul says Linda. “Linder is er, nature mad.” 

She!!

Hearing Paul talk about watching Mary be born makes me wonder if John was there with Sean? Also I wonder if Linda would talk about the experience so glowingly. Probably. She's tough as nails. I had a lovely experience, personally, after the epidural lol

“Dear friend . . . I'm in love with a friend of mine.” This is such a strange and beautiful song. It's a man who has to apologize to his friend for falling in love with someone else. At least, that's my interpretation. What's everyone else's?

I understand why he's so closed off. I do. But when John is going off every five seconds, we're missing half the picture here and it's turning out warped. They really are such a good study of attachment honestly.

“Nothing will ever break the love we have for each other.” White-knuckling my way through this section with this quote clenched in my fist.

Yoko, talking about John fighting with Paul: any couple will go from swearing to kissing and it's like that. What favors are you doing yourself here, babe? Maybe John's the PR mastermind between the two of them.

I find John's comparison of working with his romantic partner to being ambidextrous very confusing. Does he mean just doing two things at once?

“If I can't have a fight with my best friend, I don't know who I can have a fight with.” -- Intro slutty gender-fluid Wings Paul my beloved -- “Tell me why, why, why do you treat me so bad? So bad? When you're the best friend a man ever had?” I heard on some podcast somewhere. Someone was going on about how forward-thinking the Beatles were to refer to the women in their songs as “friends”. And I was like, nununununu do not give them that credit.

This is just soooo. In this era? 90 minutes in the middle of a recording session?

John: Sorry, my estranged fiance is calling, gotta take a break. Guitarist: again? Drummer: how estranged can they be if they call every three minutes? Yoko: should we just record the other parts or . . . John: (receiver cradled to his cheek, lovesick grin on his face) Hey, how was Heather's school program? Haha, yeah, I bet she was.

Okay, so you've made up with Paul and now you're done being homophobic? *Cardi b voice* well that's suspicious. 

The fact that John's asking Paul to play on stage with him in 1972?? Ugh! If it was just about legalities and money and shit I would be genuinely so pissed at Paul for not going. If only because Come Together sounds incredibly lame without his bass and piano. But also for the obvious fix-it reasons. I have to remind myself of how truly awful Klein was. By being the only one to stand firm against him, Paul actually ended up saving them all from a lot of trouble. But gosh would this have been good!

Things normal people say, for sure, for sure.

Okay in my head it went like this. John calls George and bitches about what an egomaniac Paul is because he won't do anything with him as long as Klein is involved. George gets off the phone and calls Ringo and they make a bet as to how long it is until John decides they should get rid of Klein. 

“Where's your audience, Paul?” “In the theater, Dave.” As he should. The cuntiness is unparalleled. Yeah, maybe people like to see a family friendly eclectic magic pixie sexy hard rock floor show? Ever thought about that, Dave?

Anyway, he seems genuinely pissed when the interviewer even mentions the other Beatles and he refuses to even admit he still talks to any of them. Why? 

John's just so benevolent and selfless. He's completely straight, of course, but he's always offering to do gay shit. You know. To be nice. 

I forget that not only was May their literal employee, but she was ten years younger on top of that. And yet, she managed to do so much good in that relationship. I have so much respect for her. 

There's obviously a lot going on behind the scenes that they don't say in interviews. Duh. But I wonder what it is that caused Paul to be so open and happy in this interview where he's asked about the other Beatles compared to before. I wonder if he and John had a really lovely talk, or if he's heard a demo of “I know, I know.” Or maybe it's just he's so reassured that they've got rid of Klein that he feels safe acting open to a reunion on record. Who knows, Yoko. 

So so smart to pair “In My Life” handwritten lyrics with the matching lyrics of “I know I know” playing at the same time. I forget about that connection (“I love you more”) because it's so overshadowed by the “than yesterday” right after. I seriously wonder if John thought he was being so obvious with this one the way he was with HDYS and half hoped people would ask him if it was about Paul and he could make up for the whole thing. Because it's just so heavy-handed. It's beautiful. I love it. I'm sure Paul loved it. But yeah. John's just beating us over the head with the references here. 

I also wonder (very tentatively!!!) if Paul was maybe a bit more emotionally vulnerable with John than we usually think. I would never think this except for the “you know I nearly broke down and cried” “I'm sorry that I made you cry” and “no more crying!” I don't know. What do we think? 

His little baby smirk. It's so silly and cute. He's being very positive about getting back together, and the interviewer asks if John would initiate that. Just a very coy, “a, well, I couldn't say.” I wonder if at that point if he'd said on live tv that he wanted to get together again if it would've happened. Seems like it might have, but I understand him being scared. 

Elton John taking pictures like a fan and John: I wanna impound all those photos till I get me green card. What a random idea for a commercial. I love it, obviously, it's hilarious. I wonder who thought of it. 

This doc is so good at implication. The smirk as “loving in the palm of my hand” plays. That's not a reference to hand jobs, is it? Certainly not talking to someone with beautiful hands?

Everyone go look up Nineteen Hundred Eighty Five on YouTube. The singing sex is something else, yeah, but I'm always so blown away by the piano part. The fact that he's self taught and doesn't read music and this man will go on to compose symphonies. 

#paul mccartney #the beatles #john lennon #mclennon #linda eastman #yoko ono #understanding lennon mccartney #ulm

[babydollmarauders]

SWISS MISS — MEDIA MANAGEMENT: SUMMER EDITION

y/ndevils00

liked by jackhughes, nicohischier, and 115,725 others

y/ndevils00 missed my swiss 🧀 (and got to see his family! it was a win-win!)

tagged nicohischier

trevorzegras YOU SAID YOU WERE GOING TO VISIT YOUR FAMILY!

y/ndevils00 and i did!

trevorzegras for what? a day? before you hopped on a flight to SWITZERLAND?!

y/ndevils00 ehhh more like 8 hours, give or take a few

jackhughes tell cap i say hi!

y/ndevils00 tell him yourself?? expecting me to give him messages from you— tf do i look like, a cell phone?

y/ndevils00 cap says hi back 😒

nicohischier i love having you here, bug ❤️

y/ndevils00 so grateful nina was able to help me surprise you <3

john.marino97 ME NEXT?

y/ndevils00 gimme a reason

john.marino97 because i’m your best friend number 2?

y/ndevils00 ehhh not good enough

john.marino97 because i love you and i miss you and i don’t know if i’ll survive without you until september?

y/ndevils00 did dawgson tell you to say this?

john.marino97 sorry the number you are trying to reach is no longer in service 🫣 🏃🏻

jackhughes i hope you’re having fun, my love! LSH and i miss you ❤️

y/ndevils00 awww you miss me? 🤭 (sap)

jackhughes yeah yeah 🙄 just come home

y/ndevils00

liked by nicohischier, siegenthaler34, and 112,521 others

y/ndevils00 went to a fancy shmancy wedding with Neeks and look who i found!

tagged nicohischier and siegenthaler34

y/ndevils00 my 2nd favorite swiss man! uncle siegs!

lhughes_06 what is this, a devils reunion? without jack and i?!

y/ndevils00 yes! timo is next! so glad you understand 🫶

dawson1417 ARE YOU HAVING FUN, BEST FRIEND (3) ?

y/ndevils00 I AM, BEST FRIEND (1)

dawson1417 i’m so glad! NOW COME VISIT ME NEXT

jackhughes smoke show 😮‍💨🔥💨

y/ndevils00 beloved, please never use those emojis again

jackhughes okay, understood

jackhughes that’s mine! 🔒❤️

y/ndevils00 who? ME?! 🤭

nicohischier thanks for being my plus one! i could’ve done without you telling everyone that i was your “whore on the side” though

y/ndevils00 is that not what you are??

nicohischier no?

y/ndevils00 could’ve sworn that title was in the friendship contract we signed

nicohischier once again, that was an NDA

siegenthaler34 it was lovely seeing you, y/n/n! can’t wait to see you again in September ❤️

y/ndevils00 you’re the sweetest swiss of them all <3

y/ndevils00

liked by tmeier96, jackhughes, and 108,492 others

y/ndevils00 is this what timo time really means? i think i love it

tagged tmeier96

lhughes_06 it’s like you guys are twins

lhughes_06 it’s creepy

y/ndevils00 that’s my big brother!

lhughes_06 …he’s not actually though, right?!

y/ndevils00 no? i thought you would’ve known by my lack of accent?

lhughes_06 look, i’m just trying to make sure there’s no risk of my brother getting his ass handed to him

jackhughes do you not have ANY faith in me?!

lhughes_06 @/jackhughes no

jackhughes switzerland, italy, back to michigan now please!

y/ndevils00 i’ll be home tomorrow, honey bun 🤍

jackhughes can’t wait to see you, my little honey nut cheerio

jackhughes “sheesh” - trevor zegras

y/ndevils00 oh.. no…

tmeier96 lovely to be annoyed by you again, little sis!

y/ndevils00 you didn’t expect me to NOT come and celebrate your contract signing, did you?!

tmeier96 well, it certainly wasn���t a possibility i had thought of

tmeier96 but i’m glad you did!

y/ndevils00 nice coverup 🤨

john.marino97 LOOK AT YOU

y/ndevils00 LOOK AT ME

john.marino97 BEAUTIFUL BEST FRIEND

y/ndevils00 THANK YOU BEST FRIEND 🤭

jackhughes back off Maraschino Cherry

y/ndevils00 @/jackhughes just think of John as my gay best friend!

john.marino97 i’m not gay?

y/ndevils00 but you’re also not trying to fuck me <3

john.marino97 very true. you’re not my type

y/ndevils00 BITCH???

nicohischier did you make him sing taylor swift too?

tmeier96 no?

dawson1417 BEST FRIEND YOU’RE GLOWING

y/ndevils00 🇨🇭 AND 🇮🇹 HAVE DONE ME WONDERS

trevorzegras ITALIA ☀️🛵🍝

y/ndevils00 TREVOR 🐀🥱🗣️

trevorzegras i am nothing but nice to you

y/ndevils00 who do you think you’re fooling?

#media management au! #media management series <3 #nico hischier imagine #jack hughes x reader #jack hughes imagine #nj devils #nhl blurb #nhl fic #nhl imagine #faithlynn’s insta edits <3 #faithlynn’s writings <3

[hotvintagepoll]

Propaganda

Eva Dahlbeck (Smiles of a Summer Night, A Lesson in Love, Kastrullresan)— Beautiful, formidable, funny. Ingmar Bergman called her a "battleship of femininity" and cast her in several of his comedies. It's a joy to see her pulling all the strings in Smiles of a Summer Night while her two boyfriends make utter fools of themselves.

Maureen O’Hara (The Parent Trap, The Quiet Man)—They called her the Queen of Technicolor. That right there should help introduce people to the fiery, wonderful, stunning Maureen O’Hara. She was from Ireland, born in 1920, and started in theater at the age of ten. At 15, she was winning drama awards, including one for her performance as Portia in the Merchant of Venice. At 16, she was the youngest pupil to graduate from the Guildhall School of Music. By 18, she transitioned to film, starting off with a bang alongside Charles Laughton in Hitchcock’s Jamaica Inn, and proceeded to work steadily up through the early 1970s. She was in adventures and comedies and romances, spent a lot of time in westerns giving merry hell to John Wayne (and less merry hell to the indomitable John Ford — she held her own even when he was verbally abusive and demeaning to her). She was in The Quiet Man, which was the first American-made film entirely filmed in a foreign country. She helped make American Christmas what it is with Miracle on 34th Street. She played a lineup of headstrong, forthright women second only, perhaps, to Katharine Hepburn. She was married three times, lived for a while with a boyfriend in Mexico, sued for custody of her daughter in the 1950s, AND sued a magazine for libel in the same era. After mostly retiring from acting, she edited a magazine. She eventually sold the magazine to spend more time with her grandson, but even then ran a ladies fashion store. She was an outspoken, brilliant, passionate lady, with amazing red hair, a career to envy, and — well — that face!

This is round 1 of the tournament. All other polls in this bracket can be found here. Please reblog with further support of your beloved hot sexy vintage woman.

[additional propaganda submitted under the cut]

Eva Dahlbeck:

Maureen O'Hara:

I thought she was one of the most beautiful women in the world when I was a kid and I have yet to really change my mind. Always loved her temper and her red hair. Plus she was kind of a MILF in The Parent Trap

Haughty, red hair, hot.

The hair. The accent. The figure. The acting chops. The perfection.

I would have to give up my passport if I didn't submit Maureen O'Hara but also have you seen her? Not only did she look like that (she was called the Queen of Technicolor, though she wasn't a big fan of that sobriquet), she was also very funny and tough as nails. She faced off against Walt Disney in a contract dispute and the legend goes that when someone mentioned her at his deathbed, he sat up and said 'That bitch!'. Her comment on that story is "At least he didn't think of me and say, 'That wimp'." She struggled to get serious roles for a time, saying ""Hollywood would never allow my talent to triumph over my face," so she plays the sexy princess/pirate/harem girl in a LOT of early movies that she referred to as "Tits and Sand" films, she being the tits in question. She also turned down so many leading men and studio bosses (Errol Flynn and Howard Hughes are among her rejects) that there were rumours spread that she was a lesbian. Many egos were battered it seems. I'm including the infamous Lady Godiva scene in the photo propaganda for the sheer Moment of it [link] . It was a bit of a flop critically, but it was one of Clint Eastwood's first film appearances and she said he told her later that he was very glad of the money at the time. She was a very proud Irish woman and when she went for her American citizenship they insisted on referring to her as British (the timeline of Irish independence is a bit wibbly wobbly, we won't get into it here). She refused to accept American citizenship under that condition and argued her way through every level of US immigration she could find, supposedly saying "I'm not responsible for your antiquated records here in Washington", until a judge finally gave up and said "Give her what she wants, just get her out of here". This made her the first ever person seeking US citizenship to be proclaimed Irish on the record! And while we don't embrace the leprechaun imagery quite so enthusiastically today, her dressing her dog up in a little shamrock hat is too cute for you all to miss so I'm including that in the photo propaganda.

*Marge Simpson voice*: I just think she's neat 🤷‍♀️

#maureen o'hara #eva dahlbeck #fuck that old woman #hotvintagepoll #ladies 1

[doeshrine]

Any general headcanons for doe; romantic or just regular guy stuff :]

You guys really wanna know MORE!? AHH I have had no one to talk about my beloved Doe with AH! Sorry sorry! I'm done gushing! Genuinely just happy to talk about them.

TW: YANDERE RELATED TOPICS

----------------------------------------

John Doe absolutely goes by he/they pronouns. No ya'll can't take this from me.

Even in their female form which is often referred to as "Jane Doe", I feel like that would just piss them off. I think just bc he changes his presentation doesn't mean you get to misgender them. I think despite presentation changes he'd still be himself and still go by John Doe.

So Regular Guys are pretty much pests in the Uncanny Valley. John Doe's eyes are kinda of explained in House Hunted 2 that he has to physically split his eye in half so he blends in. Personally, I think that's got to be uncomfortable all the time, so at home he does go from two eyes to one eye since he feels comfortable about it.

Many would think he's controlling which I think he can be occasionally, but not on purpose. Due to some of the things he has been through all alone, I think he views himself being controlling as protecting you, and while yeah he's a whole yandere I think he's more than willing to hear you out on making him comfortable while also accommodating your- freewill lol.

He hisses at people.

He stares at you when you sleep. There is no way ya'll convince me otherwise.

He doesn't require sleep but understands that you prefer to snuggle in bed with him at night.

He hates any of your plushies. He thinks if you hug them, you like them more than him- but he won't throw them away. He likes how soft they are.

He stutters a lot when trying to explain his feelings to you. He isn't used to people viewing him as a person over a pest.

Despite being a yandere, he is oddly good at communication if you teach him what it is and how to understand boundaries. He's going to slip up and you gotta understand that when going into the relationship.

He just orders takeout a lot. I have a weird headcanon that Regular Guys can make things from thin air so when he orders food he hands them money he just conjures. ((This man accidentally inflates the economy one eldritch magic dollar at a time.))

When he gets all hyper-realistic, he doesn't acknowledge it as "scary" to him he's sort of blind to it happening. While yes he is physically doing it, he doesn't see it so he just- kinda thinks you're being mean to him if you freak out. I think he's a visual learner so cues such as covering your eyes help him understand you're just uncomfortable, but don't love him any less.

He lets you pet his hair and despite the curls it never knots or tangles. Like it never knots up.

He isn't good with animals. Except crows love him. He likes crows.

He does try to clutter your home- and uh that's gonna require you explaining to him that humans need clean spaces to live.

Did I mention he's jealous? However, he can be really subtle about it. He just glares or waits till you turn to go hyper-realistic on someone.

He has an existential crisis in one breath, but in the next will ask you to pass the popcorn. (he is unwell)

For my FNAF bitches, he would listen to your info dump about the FNAF lore any day of the week. Any kind of hyperfixation or special interest of yours he will listen to you talk about it. He can keep up with however you talk and will never ask you to speed up slow down or stop talking. He just likes you.

He can help with chores, water CANNOT be involved.

In his Lil' Doe form (I HAVE DIBS ON THE NICKNAME >XP), he takes dust baths, but because he isn't human he doesn't have to take traditional showers. He can't too or his form does break down so please take care of him.

Despite him hating you taking showers, he learns to accept it due to the fact you explain it is a health thing. He realizes a human being is much more complex than a Regular Guy physically and requires more care than a dust bath.

He makes sure you eat. If you don't eat he becomes paranoid you will die.

Has he killed people for you? Yep.

Kinda running out of thoughts!

#character x reader #john doe #john doe visual novel #john doe x reader #john doe x you #tw yandere #johndoeshrine #obsessive yandere

[arthurtaylorlester]

RETURN OF THE KING: MALEVOLENT LIVEBLOG EPISODE 37 THE FARM

spoilers (you already know)

back at it with some humming!

JOHN MY BELOVED !!!! youre so bitchy i love him

HES SO PETTY HELP

harpers hill mention omg (harpers hill hijinks coming soon)

“MY BOOK HMPH 😤” girl 😭😭

“i didnt realise” yes because you cant see and john is like really really dumb

it kills me that john is bitching about oscar not finding anything but like what information have you contributed in the last 3 episodes

ive missed bullying john

malevolent is a comedy and i will stand by that

mmm rain sounds

HYPNOS GREEK GOD MENTION ‼️

“can you imagine hahah” yes i can it was the best arc of the show send tweet

well you havent seen his face

whys john being so quiet all of a sudden?

OH WHAT THEFUCK I SAW RHIS COMING

“i suppose ill just watch again” SOMEONE IS A JEALOUS GIRL

arthur ignoring john….. the girls are going to DIVORCE

“not you sorry ^_^” and then he goes back to ignoring john?? girl

oh wait that was very sweet

WHAT THE FUCK I JUST TOOK ABDHDNFN

sorry arthur speaking to john like that just destroyed me

I TRUST YOU AND YOUR MY FRIEND??? IM NOT TRYING TO IGNORE YOU?? THEYRE COMMUNICATING A

“its not because i dont care 💛” “…yes?” oscar this isnt about you

poor guy though he must be so confused

arthurs tone changes so much when he speaks to john

someone get john a pair of glasses either that or he was too busy daydreaming to see the turnoff

oh of course john would want to split off because he hasnt ever seen a horror movie arthur if you die then it’s your fault for not showing him the movie 🙄

“we might have to sleep in the car” okayyyy

oh so now john wants to give him info because he deserves to know

aaaand now he doesnt want to tell him. we love a hypocritical king !!!

return of the canadian sourry

you dont need to sound so smug that he looks hurt john 😭😭

okay oscar love the existential crisis while reading very relatable

is he gonna say arthur is his purpose

oh for fucks sake

NOT THE SOFT “oscar”

ok oscar is def into arthur and arthur saying “i don’t believe in god” is like rejection. this is how unrequited blindfaith can still win.

also god believes in you? well john and kayne sure seem to believe in him for what its worth

oscar nooo dont devote yourself to arthur that never ends well

john i dont care about oscar either but you have got to stop laying it on so think jfc

john the undefeated more like john the opportunist

“woAH” same john same

oooh so john can see auras now basically?

what monster are we gonna find in the barn 👀

oh that sounds fun actually though /j

AWW I KNEW HE WAS GONNA ASK IF HE WAS OK

ok i love how prominent the dreamlands are this episode i was just thinking about how good it was

john just wants his alone time with arthur because he cant answer his questions

“i need another set of eyes” thats like the one thing john can do it must be kinda sad to like, not be able to fully do the one thing you used to be great at

“ *gasp* a forgotten one :0” john dont act like you know what that means

hey is john a forgotten one then. is he. is he though.

can everyone except arthur feel the weirdness of places

NOT THE MUSIC BOX MUSIC IN THE BACKGROUND HARLAN WHEN ARE YOU GIVING US AN OST PLEASE IM BEGGIN YOU

ITS MIDNIGHT DONT GO IN THE FUCKING BASEMENT ITS RAINING YOURE BEING CHASED BY AN EDLRITCH THING

john its ok if you didnt see it you dont need to justify yourself ❤️‍🩹

john sounds almost scared to go in the basement lol

the stairs are gonna give out at a later date im calling it

what could possibly happen in the last 15 minutes

a door ajar omg is that a wtnv reference

did arthur almost die by getting crushed by a bunch of furniture

oh a barricade i know what this is about

oh happy halloween btw guys

OSCAR JUMPSCARE

my honest reaction too john

what… what did you just sink into….

oh hole in roof, cool

arthur pay attention oscar hes gonna set hjmself on fire on accident

the jarthur was too busy analysing the painting to pay attention to oscar

OH GODDAMIT ARTHRJ WHAT THE FUCK JOHN WHAT THE DAGGER? THE ONE HE SLIT HIS THROAT WITH

oh he wants to cut it off ok

jfc 7 minutes oh no

I CALLED THE STAIRS CAVING IN

GUYS HE WAS READING THE BOOK OFC HE KNOWS

question: how strong is arthur physically

“A TOWEL!” “A TOWEL?” as i said a comedy

WE GOT A “WELL DONE ORTHUR” LETS GO

you know its weird that i can handle this fine but couldnt deal with the michael torture in the woe.begone finale

NO ARTHUR ITS NOT OK

HES ISNT GOING TO MAKE IT

oh ok hes fine sort of ok

the music goes so hard again

that arthur was so scared

ok the arms alive run

or get john to arm wrestle it idk

“what thE fUCK WHAT THE FUCK” my daily vocabulary

and oscar was right :)

RUN YOU IDIOTS

arthur you could at least carry him instead of dragging him that poor poor man

i find it amusing that this mostly happened because of jarthur studying a painting and ignoring the man currently in possession of their braincells

indeed what do we do now

and thats a wrap! oh boy what an episode i have THOUGTHTS (oscar is not surviving this)

i know like maybe 2 people read this type of posts but i enjoy making and reading them back. so if youd like me to keep going with these i will :)

#malevolent #malevolent podcast #unhinged aromantics #arthur lester #john doe #john malevolent #arthur malevolent #malevolent john #malevolent arthur #oscar malevolent #malevolent oscar #malevolent spoilers #mr scratch #malevolent part 37

[elena-mayfair]

Letting go

Paring: Morpheus x f!reader, Sandman x f!reader Warnings: swearing, horror images, adult themes, reader discretion is advised Summary: The hardest thing one can do is to let go. But some feelings are not worthy of holding onto them. They drag one down, making it unable to move, to live. Is love one of them? Can Witch truly love the Dream? Word count: 6.3k Note: Gifs are not mine, credit to the authors.

Series Masterlist Part sixteen: Dreams that came true

***

Morpheus watched as Y/N silently donned a black dress, black high-heeled shoes, and pulled out an elegant handbag and jacket from her closet. She hid her amethyst pentacle amulet and a vial of sand under her dress and hung a delicate elegant chain with a silver star and moon around her neck. She put her hair up in a loose braid, single strands of hair kept slipping out and dancing around her face. She did her makeup delicately, classy, it matched her outfit so well. As he observed her once again, he began to wonder if he actually knew humanity as well as he thought he did. Or perhaps in his hubris, he thought he did, but in fact, he had stopped paying attention to the complexities of human nature. For here she stood before him, elegant and beautiful, like the brightest star shining in a black sky, and in her eyes he saw a sense of relief mixed with torment.

"Beloved," he began in a gentle voice, "although I understand your feelings I do not think this is a good idea."

She did not respond. She secured the silver earrings in her ears in silence and slipped a bracelet and watch on her wrists. She didn't even flinch when he spoke to her, as if she had tucked all her feelings, the good and the bad, deep at the bottom of the well of her soul.

"Y/N," he continued, "I know you consider his death a direct result of your actions and my words have no meaning for you now, but…"

"They do have meaning to me Morpheus," she interrupted and looked at him, "but they can't change my mind. I'm going to his funeral. Yes he was a monster, yes he almost brought me to ruin, but he didn't deserve such a death." She sighed heavily and reached for a cigarette, "His mother will be there. I knew her, I spent few years with him," she paused and exhaled the smoke, "I hated the bitch but I owe her that much. After all, she's about to bury her only son."

"What about your feelings?" Morpheus asked, "You keep talking about what's appropriate, what you should do, what you owe to others. Tell me, my dear, where are you in all this?"

"My feelings don't matter," she replied coldly.

Morpheus stepped up to her then took her hand and drew it close to his heart.

"For me, they are the most important," he said and looked deeply into her gleaming eyes.

"If I allow myself," she began in a quiet voice, "if I allow myself to feel, they will consume me, flood me and drown me…" she swallowed her tears, not letting a single one escape from her eyes. "I hate funerals, they remind me of…. of everyone I buried."

"You should not hide your feelings, especially from me," he said softly, "I have seen your nightmares. I know what haunts you."

"All the more reason you should understand that I can't afford feelings now. Any feelings. If I open this door… it will destroy me," her barely audible voice sounded distant, cold as if emptiness had consumed her soul and mind and everything beautiful about her.

"I will not allow this to happen."

She was silent for a moment, gazing only into the endlessness of the universe in his eyes. He could see her emotions under the facade of calm. Boiling anger, rage, relief, happiness, shame. He wanted her to allow herself to feel, wanted her not to try to stifle them inside her at all costs. "After all, to feel was so very human. After all, she doesn't have to hide, not from me."

"John is also going, they knew each other for years. He promised to come and pick me up," she finally said, "you don't have to worry. I'm sure you have more important things than my ex's funeral."

For a moment, Morpheus felt hurt. "How can she think that I would let her go alone, even if accompanied by a friend. How can she think that I could leave her."

"Do you not want me to accompany you?" he asked.

"Of course, I want to I just…" she hesitated, "I thought maybe you would prefer, I don't know…fuck! I don't know what I wanted to say. Sorry..."

"I won't let you go alone."

They both turned their heads at the sound of a quiet knock on the door. Y/N slipped her hand from Morpheus' grasp and with a frail smile on her face went to open the door behind which Constantine was leaning nonchalantly against the frame. To her surprise, he had abandoned his tan coat that he always wore. He was dressed in a dark gray pin-stripe suit with a white shirt and black tie. "He looks elegant," she thought at the sight of him.

"Ready love?" he asked with a cigarette hanging at his lips, "Chas is waiting for us downstairs."

"Let me just get my blazer and purse," she replied, "are we driving Chas’ cab?"

"That stinky old junk? Nay, it doesn’t seems appropriate," he replied, "just as it's not appropriate to look so devilishly good at the funeral of an ex who blew his brains out," he commented sarcastically on her outfit, "have you seen yourself in the mirror?!" he called out after her entering the apartment, "you look damn fine love."

Morpheus upon hearing his words emerged from the living room and entered the hallway. He filled the entire space from floor to ceiling with his presence, causing Constantine to take a step back in surprise. He gave him an icy stare and the stars in his eyes lit up menacingly. Fear ran across Constantine's face.

"You should not comment on what is appropriate John Constantine," he said in a tone that froze John's blood in his veins. He would not tolerate such comments about her. He disliked the closeness they shared, and didn't believe in his intentions. He had known the Constantines in the past and knew that neither of them could be trusted.

"What, maybe I should look like a grieving widow?" Y/N sneered as she approached them with her purse in hand. It didn't escape Morpheus' attention that she had painted her lips dark red, "I'd rather look like the whore he was so eager to call me than like a sad weeping wouldn’t-be wife," she snarled then walked out of the apartment forcing them to follow her.

*

"How remarkable people can be. Death was right. Perhaps I had spent too much time away from them. Perhaps I isolated myself from them for far too long." Morpheus shifted his gaze from Y/N to Constantine then to his friend Chas. On the radio 'Unforgiven' by Metallica was quietly playing, everyone was silent and he could quietly observe them. An incredible palette of emotions was painted on each of their faces. Chas was visibly unnerved by his presence, glancing in the rearview mirror every now and then and fleeing with his eyes when he met his gaze. Morpheus could clearly see the droplets of sweat that formed on his forehead. John, on the other hand, looked seemingly calm, his fingers were tapping against his thigh to the rhythm of the drums as he let out smoke through the slightly open window. Morpheus, however, saw a grimace of displeasure and unease in his reflection. It was as if Morpheus' presence was clearly irritating him. He too glanced in the mirror every now and then only that his gaze stopped on Y/N. And she just stared numbly at the streets passing by outside the window. Her face expressed nothing, neither nervousness, tension nor sadness. She was turning the pentacle amulet unconsciously in her fingers, while Morpheus watched with fascination as faint sparks, invisible to human eyes, flashed from her fingers every time she touched it. "The wouldn’t-be wife…" he repeated her words in his mind and felt anger in his heart. Anger that someone else, someone as despicable as he was, could even have planned to call her his wife, envy that perhaps she was planning to call someone her husband. "I want to call her my wife…." he thought after which with a gentle motion he stopped her fingers dancing on the amulet. She looked at him and her face softened as he intertwined her fingers between his and clenched them tightly. She smirked but the smile did not reach her eyes. Ignoring the company of John and Chas, she moved closer to him and let him put his arm around her.

"Better?" he asked in a whisper.

"Mhm," she muttered and closed her eyes.

Out of the corner of his eye, he saw the surprised looks of his companions every now and then glancing at their reflection. Once again he felt within himself the desire to take her away, to take her away from prying eyes, away from the questions he was sure would follow in a moment. However, he knew that was not what she needed.

"When we get back," she began quietly, "I'd like to talk to you about something."

"About what?"

"Later," her gaze met the reflection of Chas' eyes in the mirror, "Chas! The road if you don't mind!" she snapped at him.

"Hey don't blame me! It's not every day that I have the opportunity to drive one of the Endless in my back seat!" Chas defended himself.

Y/N just sighed heavily and closed her eyes again allowing herself to drift off for a moment in Dream's safe embrace.

"At the funeral, there will probably be a lot of people who know me," she began after a moment, "I'm sure they will give you strange looks and ask uncomfortable questions."

"As apparently people are in the habit of doing," he replied, narrowly suspending his gaze on John's reflection.

"I hope the whole ceremony won't last long. It's not a party I'd want to stay at any longer than necessary."

" You should be worrying about that old crazy hag love," John turned around and gave you a wary glance.

"Maybe she's already forgotten about me, maybe she won't recognize me," she wished weakly.

If only Morpheus could make that dream come true.

*

You so badly did not want to go to the funeral yet at the same time you knew that it was the only right decision. "It's because of me that he's dead," the thought was circling in your head. You heard what Morpheus was saying to you, you heard his reassuring words, but you failed to register them in your consciousness. You knew very well what he had done to him. You knew why he did it. You knew that you were at the center of it all. If it hadn't been for you if it hadn't been for your nightmares if it hadn't been for your memories that Morpheus had discovered none of this would have happened. You didn't blame him. You couldn't find a shred of anger in your heart that you could direct at him. "He only wanted to protect me, only he knows what he saw in David's nightmares. He is not human, he does not feel and does not think like a human. I knew that from the beginning." You accepted his extended hand and let him courteously help you out of the car. Suddenly you noticed that his plain black t-shirt and tailored coat had changed into an elegant black Italian-style shirt with a high collar fastened under the tie with a silver pin and a perfectly tailored three-piece plain black suit.

"Stylish much?" you winked and for the first time allowed yourself a sincere smile. Morpheus only chuckled quietly after which, as was in his habit, he guided your hand under his arm.

"If needed I have a few tricks up my sleeve that are sure to rock the party," Constantine stepped to your other side and took a drag on his cigarette.

"Dancing zombies with holes in their heads?" you quipped.

"Can be done," he winked with a smile, "Alright let's get this over with. Shall we?" he asked after which he made his way to the entrance of the chapel.

Your wishes faded the moment you entered the chapel. People were few, after all, David was not a very likable person. You hadn't even had time to head toward the darkest and most distant corner of the chapel when your gaze met that of your wouldn’t-be mother-in-law. She was as cold as ever, the icy stern gaze of a hardened woman who had never known love in her life, who had never taught her son to love. Although her gaze made you want to run away, you saw that her eyes were red, she was crying. You squeezed Morpheus' shoulder lightly and he immediately led you away from the gathered people.

"She never liked me," you murmured quietly.

He answered nothing but placed his hand on yours. His closeness and warmth made you feel somehow lighter as if he was taking a stone off your heart with his mere presence. You wanted to tell him how much it meant to you. How happy you were that he was here with you even though you were convinced that he probably didn't want to. How complete your life has become since he became a part of it. How complete you felt even here, in the chapel, at your ex's funeral, having him by your side.

"John, for fuck sake we're in church," you hissed as you saw John reach for a pack of cigarettes.

"What? It's not like they give a fuck, or like I give a fuck!" he snarled.

"But I do give a fuck!" you hissed, "lets at least keep up the pretense that we're fucking sorry for his death."

"It's a very human affliction to focus on keeping up appearances." Morpheus commented, "Why lie? Why present a false face?"

"Oh, for once I agree with Sandman," John nodded but eventually hid his cigarettes seeing your annoyed looks.

"A woman is burying her own son," you snapped angrily.

"A mean bitch if I remember correctly," he snorted, reminding you of your own words.

"But still a mother! Sorry ass mother but still a mother!" you furrowed your eyebrows, "I don't even want to imagine what a mother burying her own child must feel. No parent should bury their own children. It's not the natural course of things. It's not right."

"Everyone gets exactly the same thing," Morpheus spoke quietly, "A lifetime. However, a lifetime doesn't mean the same thing to everyone. When their time is up Death comes for them to lead them away from this world."

"And what next?" you looked at him and your voice sounded more pleading than you would have liked, "What next Morpheus? Where is Death taking them?

"I do not know that my dear," he replied softly, "I think even Death itself does not know that."

The pastor, however, claimed otherwise. The pastor confidently stated that David would be judged according to his deeds. He asked those gathered to pray for the salvation of his soul. "If I had prayed, I would have begged for you to burn in hell," you cursed him in your mind.

***

"This is not what I wanted," David wept, "You did this to me.! This is not what I wanted!"

"You wanted to escape the Dream of the Endless. You got what you wanted," a melodious voice sang in response.

"I wished to escape not to die," he could not hold back the tears that fell on the black floor mixing with blood.

"And you did escape. Exactly as you desired."

***

"I'll go pay my respects," you stated and moved toward the woman whom you once thought to call mother. You didn't want to do that. You didn't want to look her in the eye knowing that it was because of you that her son was dead. You despised her. Your contempt for her was only slightly lesser than the contempt you had for her son. For in truth, she knew what a monster her son was. She knew. She knew he abused alcohol, she knew how he treated you, she saw the bruises and scratches on your body and did nothing. The only thing she once managed to say was a short "You should leave him. He will never change." The only advice she ever gave you. Over the years of your relationship, she watched passively as he abused you and did nothing. You didn't know if it was out of fear or perhaps denial. Maybe she didn't really want to see her failure in her own son. After all, looking away was much easier. When you looked at her closely you did not feel contempt, you felt compassion.

"My condolences Grace," you said and hugged her awkwardly, "I'm really terribly sorry."

She reciprocated the hug. A brief, cool, conservative one.

"Spare me your sympathy," she replied with disgust in her eyes, "I don't know how, I don't know what you did but I know that it's because of you that my son is dead."

"Grace…" you began in an apologetic tone. You didn't have to turn around to know that Morpheus was already measuring her with one of his icy glares. "David and I split up years ago," you said.

"You left him," she interrupted you, "you broke his heart. He was never himself again. He started drinking more than before, I think he was using. He never stopped loving you."

"Grace, forgive me, but you don't have a picture of the whole story," your throat tightened trying to swallow tears of anger.

"And now what? You come here with a new guy pretending how sad you are about his death. You have no shame," she spat sourly through clenched teeth. "Perhaps it's a good thing that your mother is dead. She would be ashamed for such a daughter."

Your hand twitched impulsively as an unstoppable desire to slap her across the face took over you, and only Morpheus' strong grip on your hand prevented you from making a scene.

"I believe you have said enough," he said in a grave tone.

"Forgive me Grace…" you tried to speak softly but in your soul, you wanted for your screams and curses to echo throughout the chapel.

"Oh for fuck sake! Fuck courtesy," Constantine growled with annoyance, "Listen lady, your son was a piece of shit, a fucking sadist and sociopath! He got far less than he deserved. People like him destroy the lives of others with a smile on their faces, they blow through the lives of good people like fucking tornadoes leaving ruin and destruction! So yes, the world will be a better place without him. Or at least Y/N life will be!" he lit a cigarette ostentatiously, " Let's go! Nothing here for us. We need to open a bottle of whiskey and celebrate the death of the scumbag!"

Some part of you wanted to deny it, wanted to stop the stream of words pouring out of Constantine's mouth however you didn't. The other part of you smiled with satisfaction when Morpheus took your hand and led you to the exit. You knew you should apologize, you knew you should do something. But instead, you raised your head proudly and only threw her a fierce look. You felt sorry for the woman who buried her son, but you had no sympathy for the woman who stood by passively and ignored his abuse toward you for years. You didn't even say goodbye. You clenched your hand tightly on Morpheus' hand and, as you left the chapel, you left the past behind.

***

As you lay on the bed cuddled up to Morpheus, you felt calm, you felt safe. He laid on his back gently caressing your shoulder and hair, you knew he was watching as you breathed calmly with your eyes closed letting all the stress and tension drift away into oblivion. You listened to the steady beat of his heart as it carried you back to the shore of the ocean of Dreaming and, like its waves, washed away all your cares, it took away every worry with its every beat. He didn't ask anything, he didn't push, he was so understanding for which you were immensely grateful to him.

"Thank you for going with me," you said quietly, "I know you didn't approve of that decision but I needed it."

"There is nothing to thank for," he replied while his deep husky tone of voice brought a pleasant shiver to your skin.

"I can't believe he's gone, something…" you searched for the right word, "something doesn't seem right."

"I thought human death was nothing strange to you."

"That's not what I meant. Something…I don't know, I have a strange feeling," you clumsily tried to explain.

"You are a Witch," he said as if that would explain everything, "Your kind has always had keen senses for things unseen by others, sometimes even by us Endless."

You fell silent again. Your mind began to spiral thoughts again so instead of letting him do so you focused on Morpheus' heartbeat, on his breathing, on the touch of his gentle fingers brushing your shoulder. You desired nothing more than to disappear than to escape from the world and hide in Morpheus' endless night. "Desire" the memory of the red chamber of golden eyes and enticing smile made you snap your eyes wide open. For you realized that you had not told Morpheus about it, there was no time or opportunity.

"Earlier, you called yourself his wouldn’t-be wife," Morpheus began, and you could almost swear that you heard a trace of concern in his voice, "I would like you to tell me about it."

"I thought you knew all my dreams and nightmares?" you replied surprised by his question.

"Not all of them," he explained then continued as if knowing that this was not enough for you, "During my imprisonment, I was disconnected from the Dreaming, people still dreamed but I could not see their dreams. Including yours."

"Then how did you find out about me and David?" suspicion crept into the tone of your voice.

"I have read their records."

"Forgive me Morpheus but you'll have to give me more than that," you moved up to a sitting position and measured him with a suspicious glare. Morpheus only sighed with resignation.

"There is a library in the palace containing the records of all dreamt stories," Morpheus also picked himself up and sat leaning against the wall, "every dream and every nightmare of every living creature is written on the pages of the books that are kept there. But not only dreams and nightmares. Every story, every tale, every fantasy that has been conceived is written on the pages of the books in my library."

"So you mean to tell me that you have read my entire story for yourself?" you furrowed your eyebrows angrily.

"No," he replied calmly, "I have not read your entire story. Only the parts that coincided with David's dreams period. I had to confirm my assumptions, the human mind can be very treacherous." The stars in his eyes searched for understanding.

"You didn't have to, you wanted to," you corrected him, "You wanted to check it, you wanted to find out."

"Yes, I wanted to. I already explained it to you, he had to be punished," in his eyes and tone of voice you didn't find a hint of regret.

"And now he's dead," you commented coldly.

"Do you blame me for his death beloved?" the starlight dimmed as if disappointed by the implication of your words, "I find no remorse or regret for his death. The only thing I regret is that he did not suffer longer, that he found escape in Death. He should suffer for decades and centuries for the harm he caused you."

"How can you say that…" you whispered and your voice sounded more fearful than you wanted it to.

"That would be the only just punishment," the stars shone coldly.

So rarely did the realization of the power of his being actually reach you. You absorbed every new experience he brought you like a child delighted in discovering a new world. Although subconsciously you knew and understood that he was not human you rarely really noticed. Everything was beautiful and magical. It was so easy for you to forget that Morpheus was not only the King of Dreams but also of Nightmares.

"How can you be so loving and kind and yet so harsh and cruel at the same time?" you whispered in disbelief.

"And how can you be so compassionate and simultaneously so cruel?" the endless night gazed into your eyes, "You have so much compassion in you for others and at the same time you can be cold and merciless to those who, in your judgment, do not deserve compassion."

"My actions are nothing compared to your power."

"Which does not make them inferior. Which does not make your nature less complex than mine," he explained kindly, " Do not diminish the significance of your actions just because your power does not allow you to do what I do."

"I wish I knew what it would be like to be able to do what you do," you whispered in reverie.

"Would you have acted similarly then?" he asked.

You didn't answer immediately, you only smiled faintly, and stretched out on the bed again. Morpheus remained distant from you, so you extended your hand invitingly and he accepted it. He stretched out on the bed again and slid his arm under your head.

"Worse," you replied resting your head on his chest again, "Much worse."

Morpheus brushed your hair away from your face and kissed the top of your head.

"Everyone around me is dying…" you murmured into his chest, "Like I'm cursed. Don't get me wrong, I'm not sorry about his death, maybe it makes me cruel, but I can't grieve over this," you said while Morpheus only listened in silence, "I just can't get rid of this feeling that everyone who comes in contact with me dies sooner or later. Usually sooner. My mother, father, both grandmothers, people I couldn't save, now David. It's like death is following me taking everyone I ever cared about. It's as if there is no room in my life for anything else but a constant struggle, a constant fight against the Despair that lurks in every nook and cranny of my life."

"You are not cursed."

"Then how do you explain it? I don't want to make myself a victim or feel sorry for myself, people have it worse…"

"Comparing yourself with others won't make you nobler, it will only make you more bitter." he interrupted you gently.

"I know, it's not a point. I have accepted the fact that my life is what it is, but…" you sighed deeply, "I can't help but wonder about the nature of it all. Death, suffering, Despair, dreams…. I'm dwelling on the meaning of life cuddled up to the personification of Dream and a million questions are bouncing around in my head."

"Then ask them," he encouraged.

"Well, because if you exist in…hmmm…physical form, as a person with feelings and desires and free will then I have to accept the fact that Despair, Desire, and Death are similar to you. That they also have thoughts, feelings, and plans, they also take actions based on their will. But if I accept this fact, it is only natural that further questions will arise," you felt Morpheus' hand tighten on your waist and draw you closer to him.

"I understand where these questions come from, there is a reason why most mortal beings do not know about the existence of Endless," he sighed, "We exist because humans exist. We exist because humans subconsciously know that we exist. It is, in a way, a symbiotic relationship. If people did not desire, despair, die or dream we, the Endless, would not exist. But if we didn't exist people wouldn't be able to experience these feelings."

"But is the fact that we experience these feelings your doing?" you continued, "Is it, for example, that we desire because Desire wants us to, or do we desire arbitrarily while at the same time causing Desire to exist?"

"I do not know the answer to that question," his low voice sounded distant, sadly even, "Even we do not know what came first egg or hen."

"It's so frustrating!" you exhaled and sat down again. You pulled your knees up to your chin and gazed into space "You have free will! You make decisions arbitrarily of the nature of your existence. So if I accept that, then I have to assume that Despair is similar to you. Does that mean it can intentionally bring suffering into my life? For some reason to cause all these nightmares in my life? If Desire is like you then are my feelings even real? Is the love I feel for you real or is it just the result of manipulation? I love the Dream and I question whether this is even possible." You spoke quickly, pensively, without taking a breath or thinking about the implications of your words. Only when Morpheus leveled his gaze with yours you understood. The stars in his eyes shone with a radiance you had never seen before. Intense, piercing you to the core, full of hope, full of longing and love.

"Say it again…" the request emerged from the abyss of night.

"That night you said that if I let you, you will love me until time ceases to exist, " you looked into the endlessness of his night but you were not nervous, despite the questions crowding your head you felt calm, you felt certain. "But I said I don't know if I can love again…." As you gazed into the glittering stars in his eyes you made the decision that they would become your beacon, that you would follow them even to the end of the world and time and existence, "…that was a lie," you smiled seeing the splendor of the stars burning more intensely, almost blinding light, your calling, your calling to let go and let yourself be carried away by your dreams. "I love you Morpheus. I cannot let you love me because my heart, body, and soul already belong to you."

"Say it again…" his face was so close to you that you could share a breath.

"I love you."

A passionate kiss stole the words from your lips as Morpheus closed the space between you. His arms wrapped around you and pulled you as close as if he wanted you to become a part of him. He didn't have to say anything, words meant nothing when his actions said everything. Every kiss, every touch was a silent declaration of devotion and love. His endless night surrounded your senses when, in the rapture of love, you became part of him.

"It's not fair how much I love you…" you whispered as your skin ignited under his touch, "How unreasonably in love I am with everything you do. Be good to me…" you pleaded.

"You are the earth of me," he whispered in your ear, "I know exactly what I want. I want this life that I can create for us inundated with the fated thought of you," he silenced your quiet moan with a kiss, "My Heart, I am old but know that I exist to press my head between your shoulder blades at night when light is fading. Be my love, my Queen, my undoing."

"How can it be, I am so flawed…” you wept.

"My Heart, don't cry," with a kiss he brushed a tear from your cheek, "I am here, all yours. It's what my heart just yearns to say in ways that can't be said. It's what's engraved upon my heart in letters deeply worn. Today I somehow understand the reason I exist. Be mine…"

"I am all yours…"

***

When you call to me asleep Up the ragged cliffs I scramble A single thread hangs limply down And I breathe not now, not now And I find you all unwoven Trying desperately to sew I know the kindest thing Is to leave you alone

When your seams have come unknitted And you cry out to the sky "I've run out of my words, my song Just let me die, me die" The rockrose and the thistle Will whistle as you moan I could try to calm you down But I know you won't

All the pins inside your fretted head And your muttered whens and hows All your mother's weaves and your father's threads Let me rob them of you now 'Cause I'll darn you back together When you think that you're bereft And you'll wail, you'll scream, but I'll never stop 'Cause it's all that I have left

I wake and hear you calling And up those cliffs I climb And I find you with a thimble weeping May I, I ask, may I? And you gently gift it to me 'Cause you've no clue how to sew And I know the kindest thing I pray to god it's the kindest thing I know the kindest thing Is to never leave you alone

"Your soul sings in your sleep," Morpheus smiled at her and drew her close to him. Her arms and chest were marked with fresh stitches of colorful threads, with which Morpheus stitched her back together. The wind howled between the cliffs on which they stood but Morpheus only wrapped her tighter with his cloak protecting her from the menacing gust, "Is this how you see me? As someone who can stitch you up again? You are not treated beloved."

"Just because I can mask the tears in my soul doesn't mean they don't exist, " she replied, "but you, you mend them every day and every night. Before I met you, I didn't think it was even possible." She freed herself from his grasp and stood on the edge of the cliff. She was dreaming, and he, the Lord of Dreams was with her, there was no threat to her, "And even though it hurts sometimes I am grateful for your grace Morpheus."

"I think we both darn each other, like in your song," he replied, "I see why you like it so much, the lyric could not be more accurate. At first I thought the kindest thing I could do was to leave you alone. Now I know that the kindest thing is to never leave you alone."

The wind blew harder making her lose her balance for a moment.

"What would happen if I fell?" she asked looking into the abyss beneath her feet, "Would I die?"

"Sometimes you wake, and sometimes, yes, you die," Morpheus replied, "But there is a third alternative…"

"Which is?" she asked, stretching her foot over the edge of the cliff.

"Sometimes you fly."

She knew he wouldn't let her die so she leaned her entire weight forward and let her body fall weightlessly into the abyss. She felt wonderful, light, blissful, so free, so liberated. The world around her blurred into a shapelessness of images and voices. Colorful threads sprang from space and began one by one to weave marks on her body. Each needle sting released droplets of blood that formed images, memories. A sting of the needle and she saw the faces of her dead grandmothers, they were waving at her as if saying goodbye. A stab of the needle and the image of the Jefferson family formed, they were smiling, enjoying family life after death. There was no fear or dread, just the warmth of family ties. The needle stung again forming the image of the Turners, they cried with joy at Jessica's wedding. Whole, complete, surrounded by love and warmth. Jessica beamed with happiness when her heart's chosen one put the ring on her finger. The needle pierced again making a silent cry of pain escape her lips. Blood hung in the air only to form an image of David a moment later. David as she met him, handsome, charming, caring, sober. He looked at her and smiled kindly, silently uttering Forgive me. She wept. She kept falling into the abyss and her black silk dress flew in the wind like wings. She saw her own tears suspended in the air as a ripping scream cut the air when the needle pierced her skin again. From the tears, blood, and screams, an image of her parents emerged. They danced hugged in an embrace of love, smiling carried by the sound of music. There was no sickness, no pain, no death, no tears. Dad gazed at Mom with eyes filled with love as on their wedding day, and Mom smiled dreamily, loved. Morpheus could feel her pain as the needle pierced her skin time and again, mending the wounds, he heard her quiet crying when her parents stopped dancing and looked at her, "It's time to let go daughter, my darling daughter," said mom. "You have your whole life ahead of you don't waste it looking back. Remember what I told you, life is only moments, enjoy every one of them. Live. It's time to let go."

And when the needle pierced her skin one last time sewing up the last wound she let go. Morpheus caught her in flight and carried her in his arms. She threw both arms around his neck as he slowly made his way toward the ground carrying her like a bride. She rested her head against his chest and closed her eyes.

"Never leave me alone…" she whispered.

Part eighteen: The horror and the ruin - Part 1

~~***~~ Author note: When I originally sat down to write this chapter it meant to go in a completely different direction. It even had a completely different title. But somehow story let me here and here we are...I'll be honest I got slightly emotional writing the last part. I want to make this clear, I did use fragments of songs by the unbelievably magical band The Amazing Devil in the dialogue in the second to last scene. Songs that I incorporated are Fair and Marbles and the whole lyric is of the song The Rockrose and the Thistle. I love them so much and their music is a huge inspiration for me. If you are interested you can find them on Spotify, iTunes etc. Their music is pure magic. Anyways, I'm gonna stop my ramble. I do hope you enjoyed the chapter. Dream Lord only knows that I enjoyed writing it, even though it was hard in parts. For now, as always Dear Reader, I thank you for reading. ~~***~~

Tag list: @mycrazyfandom @unavoidabledirewolf @calicoevening72 @uzumaki-mj @thegreatestsandwich @parabatai-winchester @munsonmunster @consistentreader578 @jupiterclipse @fangirlmary @clown-princesa @galaxypox @dilfsandtherapy @kc-265 @midnxghtblue @sallysal9 @0shippingtrashaway0 @lu123sworld @octo-octopie @asmallhobbitruinedmylife @xxbeckybeexx-blog @jesllianaquilesrolon @dollfaceyourfear @shaewithyou @heavenmaycare @moon-enthusiast @home-of-disaster @xmxrfx @missnightingale1971 @lilfoxyqueensworld @fate-huntress @bionic-donut @kaifloof @mischiefmanaged71 @beakami @mm2305 @redbircl @floatingintheupsidedown @chaoticmessneutralplease

@goingwiththewind @sapphireonline @thecrazytealady @hedwigprewett12 @mikariell95 @asianfrustration13 @seninjakitey @boofy1998 @killerqueen-ofwillowgreen @22carolina08 @aurorarevenclaw1927

#morpheus x reader #sandman x reader #the sandman x reader #the sandman #Morpheus imagines #the sandman imagine #Morpheus x you #Morpheus fanfiction #Morpheus fic

[heartofstanding]

Rank the Lancasterlings in order of (your) interest, go

(- wonder-worker)

I know I asked for this but what have you done to me? 😂 I feel like being asked to pick between my (hypothetical) children. I love them all so much - whoever's in sixth place is not a shitty, shitty loser, they are still my beloved. And really this is just how the ranking turns out at this specific moment. If you'd asked me a month ago, the order would be different. Ask me in a month's time and I'll have shifted things around.

Henry V. Logically, he wins every time. There's so many things about him that fascinate me and link up with things that interest me - the daddy issues, the squad of brothers, the perfect king thing, the potential queerness, etc etc. He's also why I got into medieval history and why I fell in love with the Lancasterlings.

Thomas, Duke of Clarence. I love him so much. He's so much fun to write and I'm convinced no one understands him like I do. 😂

Blanche of England. Her life is so short and sad, there's so very little about her and she's been so badly treated by Anglo historians... and I have so many feelings about her.

Philippa of England. I'm very picky about how she's written about (I don't... love the whole feral Philippa thing the Histories fandom was doing) but I adore her and I'm trying to learn Swedish so I can justify dropping $90 on the one (Swedish-language) biography of her that exists.

Humphrey, Duke of Gloucester. I love my disaster boy. Researching him is so like a two-for-one because either my girl Eleanor Cobham is mentioned or I get to imagine how she fits into it all.

John, Duke of Bedford. I love John! I love him a lot! I almost ranked him over Humpers but Humphrey's wife won it for him. His brand is boring and reliable but he seems to have been a messy bitch in France, Anglo historians just don't care to cover it. We're supposed to get a new biography of him late this year!

#asks #wonder-worker #lancasterlings

[jadejedi]

Fantasy Book Review: The Tarot Sequence (Books 1-3) by K.D. Edwards

JJ’s rating: 4.5/5

How feral did it make me: 5/5 

My book reviews

Okay, I read these kind of randomly, not really sure what I was getting into, and oh my god. Oh my god!! Okay, so most of the sci-fi/fantasy books I have read other than these were written by AFAB authors in their 20s and 30s. Which is great, and fine, but that’s a fairly limited perspective. These novels were written by an asexual man in his forties (sorry Keith, just sort of guessing on your age here lmao) and is it weird to say that it’s kind of refreshing to read a mlm romance actually written by a queer man? No, I don’t think so. These books, despite the dark topics they sometimes cover, feel like warm coziness to me. Reading these books feels like following along with a group of your beloved friends. God. I love them. 

Summary time! In a world in which Atlantis was a secret society of demigods called the Arcana (all named after tarot cards) before being destroyed in a civil war with humanity, the remaining Atlantean society has relocated to the island formerly called Nantucket. Rune St. John is the last son of the Sun Court, the rest of the Sun Court destroyed in a mysterious attack that left Rune with emotional, mental, and physical scars. Rune and his Companion (think platonic soulmate meets bodyguard), Brand, hire out their work essentially as mercenaries to scrape by. When a son of Lady Justice goes missing, Rune and Brand are hired to find him. Also, they acquire an orphaned teenager? Are they fathers now? They might be fathers now. 

These characters guys. Holy shit. They are perfect to me. K.D. Edwards was really out here like, what if I just… smash every toxically masculine stereotype out there? What if I make a snarky bodyguard character who unabashedly loves his best friend? What if these two men who have known each other all their lives are not afraid to be open about how important they are to each other and how much they genuinely LOVE each other? What if I make a romantic interest who is patient and kind and loving and not at all threatened by the relationship between his boyfriend and his boyfriend’s oldest and most important relationship? What if I create a relationship between these three men that blurs the lines between romantic and platonic?? What if I create an urban fantasy society in which queerness is normal and accepted, and where polyamory is normal and accepted? What if I make a group of characters who need a family and then FIND ONE WITH EACH OTHER???? WHAT. THEN????? (then we all cry, that’s what)

FUCK! 

These books are fun, witty, full of monsters and villains, but also some of the most heartwarming characters and relationships I’ve ever read??? Like, god. These are some of the few books that I have bought both audio book and e-book copies because I could not put them down. I *had* to be reading them, if I were at home, or at work, or in the car. And as soon as I finished them, I picked up the first one and reread them. 

This series is planned to be a trilogy of trilogies, with books 1-3 currently finished, and book 4 being written right now. I am so excited for more of this series, I can’t even tell you. Dear god. 

There is some dark content covered in these books, specifically based around what happened to the Rune on the night when his father’s court was destroyed, so if you have any questions about trigger warnings, don’t hesitate to ask. 

These books are an absolute DELIGHT. They are the queer fantasy I’ve always wanted to read, because Edwards understands that what makes the queer community special is the COMMUNITY. It’s about finding and CHOOSING your family, bitch!

Here’s a meme I made a while back to convince people to read these books (yes I spelled dinosaur wrong. oops):

READ THEM!!!

#the tarot sequence #fantasy book review #mlm #soulmates #guys i just finished reading these for the third time #SO GOOD #book review #urban fantasy #alternate history

[theancientdarkbeauty]

Payday 3 theory for New Character Designs

This is hella long, so the rest of it is under the cut, but if you want to see why that "Collar" is on Wolf and Dallas, from a lore and character design perspective, please click the "Read More"

Alright, you clicked, so you wanna know, what do I think the metal collars on Wolf and Dallas's necks are. For Wolf, you might think he was committing to the Dog Bit TM, but then you see an identical one on Dallas's neck, and he has no associations with canines of any sort in all of his years of being The Face of the Payday Gang (except for, of course, liking dogs on a casual level, he was on a team with John Wick after all, which could be counterargumented (Not a real word I know) by "but Jacket was on that team as well, and in his games, he is known for killing a good score of Doberman Pinschers" which is a bit of a theory for a different time) So the next thing you can assume, as you dirty minded Tumblr users, and as I've seen some other people say, is that they're just kinky bitches, to which I say BEGONE THOT! But in all seriousness I don't think Starbreeze would intentionally add something so noticeable to two of their most beloved characters and their only reason being "The tumblr and 34 community can logically go ApeShit now) Oh no no no my friends, if I can entertain your eyes for perhaps a paragraph longer, I'll tell you why that kinky shit in that google doc for Payday 3 with WolfHox using that collar thing would quickly devolve into more of a bloody angst story, logically.

You see, in short, these collars are helping them breath. Weird, right? But let me explain! Because, when you think about it anatomically, it will actually make a lot of sense. Lets take a look at our heisters in question real quick:

Wolf and Dallas respectively. Now, do you notice anything? (Besides, Dallas being bugged, this game works as intended) The collar is on the same place on both of their necks, right in their jugulars (yes you have 2, one for each side) Right on the Interior Jugulars/ Internal carotid arteries, though, considering the circumstances, probably the carotid arteries. This is common place knowledge, but for those who don't know, Wolf is very close to Hoxton, shown in game through various nicknames they give each other, and Dallas is the oldest of the OG four, being 44 at the time of Payday 2 (since I don't know the exact gap in time from 2 to 3, but if it is 10 years, like rumored, that means he is 54 as of "today") For reference, the other oldest character, Chains, was 37 at the time of Payday 2, Wolf 34, and Hoxton being a fucking child at 32. So, Dallas is an old man, and he's been smoking since... well the first game (that is 100% confirmed.) so his lungs are fucking WRECKED. But, why is this related? If Dallas's lungs are heavily damaged, running, vaulting, sneaking around, and doing normal heistery stuff, his lungs wouldn't be able to keep up with the oxygen needed to run his brain/other body functions. So, Dallas's lungs are wrecked, yeah, duh, but why would Wolf, the second youngest little man, need this "collar"? Also simple, he's a heartsick bastard.

Wolf lost his best friend, Hoxton, for 2 whole years, do you really think that this man, who basically lost everything, his company, his wife, his kids, his sanity, and now his best friend, wouldn't take to some pretty destructive habits? 2 years of chain-smoking and drinking and doing whatever he could to get his mind off it (be it committing violences or building machines) wouldn't take a toll on him? His lungs would be 100% destroyed, even after only 2 years, because, if I had to take a guess, he started those bad habits when he initially lost his job and went on a rampage. That man has probably been smoking for at least 2 years casually (with periods of mental breakdown chain-smoking) and then 2 more years of hard chain-smoking, non stop, destroying his body. Though, statistically, it takes 15-20 years to fuck up your lungs as bad as maybe Dallas's would be, so whatever Wolf was doing to get himself on that collar device thing must have been pretty hard core.

BUT I'M GETTING OFF TRACK!!! You clicked read more because you wanted to know what I thought the collars did! My thoughts? They artificially pump oxygen into our beloved heisters blood streams, to give them the stamina and brain function they used to have, but still probably being cheaper than a lung transplant. (A quick google search will show you that, for both your lungs transplanted, it would be $1,295,900 in America. Crazy shit, especially for 2 people. Also, if the lungs and heart were damaged, the collar things would be basically a necessity if the guys wanna run around as much as they do in game (don't ask me why you can sprint for like a minute in a half straight in a light ballistics vest when they are all old men, I couldn't tell you). Why doesn't Hoxton have one? Probably because he's a stubborn bastard. Why doesn't Chains have one? He's just built different. The fact that these things are adding extra oxygen to people's blood would mean that the collars are imbedded in their necks, which means if some pulls on them, major ouchies (plus theirs a lot of nerves there and it's really just a whole mess of a time)

THERE YOU GO! This took me 4 days to write, off and on, so for the love of god I hope I got everything right. My area of expertise is reptiles, not humans, but story writing and character development were my first things studied. But this is all head cannons, nothing concrete yet! Anyways, thank you for sticking with the ramblings of a mad lad, and have a wonderful day/night!

#payday 3 #payday wolf #payday chains #payday #payday hoxton #dallas payday #payday dallas #This was unreasonably long I'm sorry #BUT I'M SO PROUD OF MY THEORY CRAFTING GUYS!

[daincrediblegg]

okay your turn if nobody else has asked: TOP FIVE JH CHARACTERS GO

... girl... how does one choose? how does one??? when there are so many beautiful boys??? ok. OK I'll give it a shot.

5. Captain Crow - The Sea Beast This film is just incredible on every front. One of my favorite concept artists worked on it (which I did not know until a few weeks ago but now that I know I feel like kicking myself because I REALLY SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THEIR STYLE WELL ENOUGH BY NOW). But I remember watching this, and screaming when the credits began to roll because WAIT?!?!?! THAT WAS JARED HARRIS??? OH!!! WHAT A DELIGHT!!! I LOVE THAT GUY!!!! (oh babygirl wait a few months it's gonna hit you so bad). He's great. I hope we see more of him in the sequel that would be great for me.

4. Hari Seldon Honestly. What a little shit. "But Egg," you might ask "If he's such a little shit why is he on here?" well. He's hot. Really I am not over how hot this dude is. I know I couldn't fix him not in a million years. But idk. Something about him always makes my brain go brrr. So he's on here. Also I just love how fucking atypically written this show is and I have a wee soft spot for asimov. They didn't have to cast Jared as Hari and make him unbelievably hot. But they did. And he's so enigmatic. I love that.

3. John Lennon Egg's love for Jared Harris Origins. I was a Beatles girlie, ok? I'm not ashamed to admit that. It was my introductory fandom experience at the ripe old age of baby, and I really ate it up. I remember going into this movie being like "oh it's some dumb TV movie about John and Paul how good can it be?" Very good, as it turns out. And having assigned myself a John Lennon girlie I literally could never get over this depiction. The mannerisms, the fucking tripped-out way he philosophizes in conversation, the softness, and ofc the old friends tension. Jared got it all. Of course I'd seen him in stuff here and there, but this was the one that cemented him as a beloved actor in my mind for me (I literally re-wound the kiss scene as well like 20 times don't judge me but that awakened some stuff in me). Been following him ever since.

2. Lane Pryce - Mad Men This dude broke me for real. I didn't get into Mad Men until college, and binged it all on my friend's hulu account. And lemme tell ya. Did NOT see his final episode coming. Did not. And it made me genuinely weep. He was a highlight in the show. He was one of the only guys I could actually say is a good dude in that show, and he deserved so much better than he got in the end. I look at him and I'm just like... leave ur wife. Leave your job. Lets just go out of this capitalistic hellscape. I want to make him Well. I will love him forever for how he just completely destroyed me.

1.Francis Crozier / Valery Legasov - HA! you thought I was not going to tie them? WRONG! I can't keep these bad bitches apart.

Francis really needs no explanation at this point. I am so actually genuinely in love with him I'm writing a whole ass gothic romance novel of a fic for him, as you all know (and which has summarily turned out a BANGER of a modern AU as well). I made a bloody self-insert oc for him. Gothic Cinema is literally my favorite genre and Francis is the most Gothic Hero of all time, honestly (well besides Valery obviously). The serotonin he continually gives me makes my meds redundant. He is my sweet husband who I love with my whole life and that's that.

And Valery? sorry you can't put a babygirl of a man like that in front of me and not expect that I would want to jump his bones like? Not only is the constant existential dread relatable, but as much as people tell him he's not brave, he IS without a doubt, and honestly, just by virtue of uttering the most iconic logline ever fucking created he deserves this spot on this list. Both of these dudes make my soul ascend in a certain way not just with how brilliantly they were written, but with how incredibly Jared executed them (for which I want to kill the academy for not giving him awards on either). Top Beloveds forever and ever and ever amen.

#ask games #top 5 #jared harris #ofc there's a secret sixth one that only cherry knows about but it's ok y'all don't have to know #shout out to moriarty as well he was technically my first proper JH introduction before JL but #there wasn't room I'm so sorry y'all #I love him tho a lot wait I have regrets but I'm too tired to fix and debate with myself on this list anymore

[starscelly]

Talk Hockey To Me

(tag game)

tagged by @eliooliver83 and @oetter mwah love u both kisses

Tell me about:

1. The thing that got you hooked on hockey

oghhh long story for Sure. i became like. distantly enamored with it watching the bruins with my dad/brother during the 2010-11 playoffs like that and soccer were the only sports i could bother watching. then in 2019? i re-read check please, became obsessed with it on that read through, started following the players some characters were based off of - namely sid and segs. then segs lead me down a path of delusion and insanity forever. so like. either the 2011 bruins cup run, check please, or tyler seguin.

2. Your first ever fandom friend

was trying to think of tumblr moots but ! technically predates my hockeyblr era by a couple yrs. met @stickypucky through. s. stephen johns discord/minecraft server. in 2020! i think!

3. The jersey you would most like to own

it feels sacrilegious that i dont own a roope or robo or otter jersey?? so any of theirs. Need. would also kill for a mooterus jersey sorry that design fucked

4. YOUR player (you only get ONE so choose wisely)

if i said anyone other than miro i think i would collapse dead.

5. A pairing that deserves more fic

listen. i agree with 2124. u all might expect me to say 424. however. i would pay the first person to write 455 or 42455 a billion dollars. i need harls hero worship turning into "oh hes a bitch and i like him so much" ness. i would cry tears of joy .

6. Your favourite on-ice moment

OKAY . niche roopemiro moment i am abt to throw at u. first thing that came to mind was when they had a FLOP ASS zone entry moment and miro just barrels straight into brick wall roope and they have to giggle abt it from last season. it was one of my first gifs and ik there are better sets of it but. here's mine. sooo pathetic and stupid and uncharacteristic of their perfectly in sync asses.

THEN

link someone else's art/fic/etc that you love & think everyone should check out

first of all everything stars hyacinthed has written i hold sooo deep in my heart especially the 1053 fics. THIS ART STUDENTS ROBOHINTZ FIC... so special 2 me for reasons i am sure u can figure out. many more fics tbh but ummmm there are sooo many beloved hockey artists/poetry ppl/gifmakers/editors/etc i love the work of i have to fire off here. this is not all of them by FAR but. follow all of them Now.

adelphenium / stillfertile / kitnita / 39oa / txstars / ghostgeno / oetter / teex / castilles / cats0p / nash13 / suburbanbonfire / nhlportraits / a million more i am POSITIVE i am forgetting...

AND

link something you made & are proud of & want people to see

ummm. most stuff in my art tag but especially fond of this miro and this intense delly recently. also my flying stars au..... also my miro sacrificial lamb edit...... many such things i actually am proud of shockingly !

no pressure tagging, sorry if you've already been tagged or did it and i missed it or u dont do these things etc etc:

@rookiestars @veryconfusedunlabeledguy @icecoldversace @saltandpepperbox @stillfertile @stickypucky

#had to let this fella marinate in my drafts overnight... rlly important #this was so fun actually yippee #tag games

[frosty-the-killer-doll]

What are your Charlie headcanons? If you don’t mind me asking

ofc i don't mind my dear beloved anon

canonically genderfluid and pansexual; to me, they're also quioromantic, aceflux, polyamorous and dates exclusively queerplatonically, as well as switching pronouns often. in the polycule au, notable partners of theirs include zari tomaz, frost, nate, sara, ava, amaya, etc etc

obviously her sisters were abusive to her. lachesis was mentally manipulative and atropos was more on the physical side. they were also transphobic toward her, unaccepting of her fluidity and the way she utilized her shapeshifting. part of why charlie broke the loom was so she'd never have to be forced into being only and forever the gender the fates were assigned.

idk what he's got but its not neurotypical

xe considers "clotho" xyr deadname

^on that point, the legends have a running habit of desecrating statues of cl*tho with xyr real name, as well as any textbooks that include it. zari joys in fighting wikipedia articles, citing "dude i'm dating xem trust me" as her source

the reason i headcanon charlie as quoiromantic is because how similar this hairstyle is to the colors of the quoi flag, and i think charlie would get a kick out of quoiromantic's original name being wtfromantic;

considering charlie chose to stay in the 1970s, nowadays you can see her fighting in various movements of that time; women's rights, queer rights, etc. if there's a riot, protest and/or march in london, charlie's going to have been seen there. no legend is surprised when charlie shows up in photographs of those times, and they regularly reach out to her if there's a mission in her area/time. she's still something of a part-time legend in that aspect

she likes the marvel show cloak and dagger; she likes how whimsy it gets with new orleans mythology

when visiting the present, she's in a band with black siren and the canaries called the big bad aftermath.

charlie and the enchantress have definitely hooked up at least once. in fact, i think the enchantress was one of the first women that truly caught charlie's eye and made him realize he liked girls

john and charlie often talk shit abt the greek deities like gossipy little bitches

that's all i can think of rn comrade 🫡

#frosty answers #arrowverse asks #legends of tomorrow #dc's legends of tomorrow #lot #arrowverse #charlie #charlie clotho #lot charlie #arrowverse polycule au

[millenari]

if you aren't tired of "bitching" about the broadway revival, what are your thoughts on the changes to tugger's number? i find a lot of the characterization in the choreography got destroyed but i'd like to hear your take

My first problem with Tugger's number happens before the song even starts.

It's that little bit they changed, where Munk sings the 'Jellicles ask because Jellicles dare / who will it be?' and then Tugger echoes him for the start of his song. I get why they added that bit (to strengthen the plot, to remind the audience that the Jellicle Choice is the point of all of this) but I've mentioned why I dislike the idea that the cats are ALL competing for the Choice before, and of all of the cats I think reasonably Tugger ought to be least interested in the honor. So having him echo Munk as if indicating interest in being the Choice is bleh to me.

Believe it or not I don't hate Tugger's new number… I don't like it, but I don't dislike it as much as Jenny's number. Given that John Partridge's Tugger in particular is so iconic & beloved, nothing they were going to do was going to satisfy me (or most of us tbh) and I admire that they tried to go at Tugger's character at another angle instead of trying to blindly recreate something they knew they wouldn't be able to recreate.

That being said. I don't like it. In Cats, the way a cat moves is indicative of their personality. The styles they're assigned speaks of their nature, I mentioned that in the Gumbie post: Jenny has tap because it has more of a militant vibe than flowy ballet. Victoria's very romantic and sensual subplot does get flowy ballet. The dances/songs that Bomba leads are all jazzy and sensual and provocative like her. I could go on. Tugger in particular is based off of the glam rockers of the 70s and 80s. He's a rockstar, and like those rockstar figures he's sexual, provocative, unapologetic, wild, fierce, ambiguously bisexual--

He's confident and horny. Let’s put it at that. And the way he moves and dances reflects that. He doesn't crawl much, (In 98 he doesn't crawl ever I don’t think), he struts when he moves, his 'default' position has his hands on his belt right near his crotch, like a solid 30% of his choreo in Lynne's version is hip thrusts… That's how he's been characterized for a long time. In the Bway revival, they take him in a different, less slutty direction.

& to be frank, you usually would have immediately lost me at 'less slutty' but I'll admit that some of the heavy-eye-contact-plus-pelvic-thrust elements of 98 are a little. Weird. So I do protest removing the sexuality from his number (not only because I'm pro-horny and not only because I respect Gillian Lynne's horndog vision but also because I think it's vastly unfair that the Macavity number is barely touched but this one is toned down pretty aggressively. Even in the Bombadance the female dance is present and just as sexual (you know, the bending over part) but the bit where the boys join in is pretty much removed. Why are women shaking their asses as objects to be admired acceptable but abstract depictions of actual sex/sexual elements aren't? Ugh.) buuuuut I see why they would have wanted to change it. Less slutty doesn't inherently mean less good, after all, right? And he is still a little slutty, it's not like they Kids Bop'd him.

But then they also add this element of insecurity to him. Where original Tugger is oftentimes unshakable, Revival!Tugger tries to slap the shit out of Munk and Alonzo for delivering the 'terrible bore' line (And usually I prefer Misto having this line but plenty of productions give it to these two instead so whatever), he hisses at the group of cats sliding up on him near the end, and you can see him kind of primping in the background when Old Deut is announced, like he's nervous.

This… is fine, I guess. Giving your characters more depth is usually not a bad thing, but I protest Tugger + insecurity on the grounds that

A) Bomba and Demeter's (the main Female Horny Cats) sole interesting skill is apparently flirting, and yet Tugger (the main Male Horny Cat) has to have all these hidden depths, and

B) this element in addition to how they seemed to be deliberately casting (for the bway revival AND us Tour 6) Tugger as younger-sounding and also kind of sillier, he comes off more to me as somebody's lost fratboy who needs therapy instead of a famous star. And it really leaves me questioning why all these characters are supposed to like him so much when, again, he kind of gives the impression of being a bratty frat boy.

So yes, I agree on the characterization. I admire that they tried something new, but I just don't really care for what they tried, and I think the changes actively work against the core of the character, which is: the obnoxious horny guy with so much charisma and confidence that he keeps pulling anyways.

But enough on Tugger, onto the actual song.

I really like the layout of the classic Tugger number because everyone is pretty finely split up by how they think of him. You've got:

his baby fangirls on his left doing their cute little fangirl dance

his hornier, older fans just to his right (Plato in the front) who are doing a dance that's a bit more provocative

his backup buddies on the far right who seem to be less attracted and more deferential to him

a group of cats just behind him doing a dance that strikes me as neither particularly sexual nor particularly platonic (who melt into the previous two groups during certain sections of the song)

the elders in the far back, watching on with disapproval

Bomba, Munk, and Misto, who each watch on alone(ish), indicating perhaps that each of them has a unique relationship to Tugger there.

(Sometimes there are additional watching cats, depending on how the number is set up. In 98, Alonzo also watches him alone, as well as Cori).

But I love how after only a minute or so of watching, you can tell what the majority of the cast thinks of Tugger, and who agrees with who. It's super efficient storytelling. In Broadway Revival Tugger, pretty much everyone is one of Tugger's backup dancers. There are some elements of Elder Disapproval (Jenny standing up to him, Skimble trying to shoo others away) and you can see some sections of the dance are the girls fawning over him while some are the boys backup dancing for him, but they're real quick. The song has a lot of [group of cats do a dance near Tugger] [group of cats move away] [Tugger spends a couple seconds there just kind of doing nothing] [another group of cats come up] [repeat]. Compared to the classic, there's not a lot going on, and yet it still feels more disjointed.

So anyways, the song starts, Tugger poses for Google Earth, (always taking pictures), some cats come and go & backup dance for/with him, Alonzo and Munk do the terrible bore and nearly get slapped for it, Jenny and Skimble try and fail to interrupt, and then Bomba's section happens.

I don't like this part especially; it bothers me that Tugger and Bomba don't really dance with each other during her section. They just sing their lines while staring at each other and kind of walking around. Not only does it feel kind of boring, but I really love that butt-to-butt dance they do in the original, and it makes me so sad that it was removed. [smacks fist against desk] it was SO bisexual. So, so bisexual…. Plus having Bomba kneel in front of Tugger for the following 'nah' is so strange, because honestly it looks more sexual than Tugger dipping her, and makes it way less obvious that he's rejecting her after (potentially) leading her on. I'm not sure a first-time viewer watching from far away would even realize he's saying no to her. Also this section includes the entire(ish) cast lining up behind Tugger in two different ways over the course of like 15 seconds. Why.

Then Tugger admires himself in the mirror after 'Horrible muddle'— which is fine, but I like it less in conjuncture with the self-esteem thing. After that comes the little dance break, which is my favorite part of the whole song.

First, I love having Plato and Victoria doing a little dance in the background, it kind of builds up to their later dance and I think the idea of them bonding over liking Tugger is the cutest. Second, I love the Tuggoff dance that happens at the same time.

It's weird, because a lot of the time I look at the bway changes and I can't really figure out if the new choreo means anything or is trying to say anything the way the original often was. (Like that screenshot I posted just a couple paragraphs up. Why is everyone lining up behind Tugger? To show that they're all on his 'side' in regard to his interaction with Bomba? Why do they do it twice? The answer is probably just 'because it looked cool'. Tragically.) But this little Tuggoff dance is weird because it’s one of the few sections where I can easily make a guess as to what they were trying to say do/say with the choreo. I talked about it in the tags on this post, I won't type it all up again.

Tugger deliberately passing by his attention-hungry fans and grabbing Misto chilling off by himself, and then pulling him into the literal spotlight is just so on point to their relationship I made a post about the same concept not too long ago. Like this whole idea of Misto being the only one to give Tugger the space he needs and Tugger returning that sentiment by giving Misto all of the attention and spotlight he needs, is just. 10/10. No notes.

After that point I don't have much commentary. Everyone dances together for the end: I don't love that part but that's mostly just me not liking the overarching style of the new choreo than anything to do with this number in particular. I also don't like the new ending but I can't really pin down why, so I think it's just me not liking change? I'm not sure.

So yeah, don't love it, don't hate it. I have to say though: I think it's kind of incredible how this choreo has already aged in comparison to the original. The bit after the mirror where Tugger basically nae-naes makes me want to beat my head against the wall due to Cringe, and that choreo is only like 8 years old! The original is nearly 40, and it still stands up fine! It's just wild how much effort they put into making Cats 'modern' and before a decade has passed those changes are already dated!

(Though I think the cats taking a 'selfie' with the big prop camera at the end was kind of hilarious. Maybe we can have some modernization.)

#cats fan on main #jelliclerants

[silverpelt3600]

Halo 2x8 Spoilers!

It is time. It took me a WEEK to find the time to watch this goddamn finale.

Y’all know the drill, this is just stream of consciousness as I watch the episode. Whether it’s coherent or not, either way I’m losing my mind likely!

- pre-episode recap editing goes CRAZZYYY

- okay first scene who is he talking to I’m lost already

- the microscope view was so confusing for a second LMAO. Also this Jeanine girl is literally losing it.

- ALRIGHT YEAH SHE KILLED SOMEONE LMAO. Crazy virus thing? Also the happy music is killing me lol.

- Kai and her team yay! KAI AND HER TEAM OH GOD. Casual explosion that fucks it all up.

- “Master Chief, I speak for the entire UNSC when I say how happy I am to see you back with us” THIS BITCH.

- OOOHHH YEAH JOHN YOU HANG UP ON HER

- OOH. THATS NASTY WHAT JUST CRAWLED OUT OF JANINES MOUTH.

- fuck I feel so bad for John. Totally torn, and the admiral’s little comment of “there’s nothing anyone can do for them” is just the cherry on top. She pisses me off so much lol

- “you have no idea what I can do” FUCK YEAHHHHHH. THATS WHAT IM TALKING ABOUTT, YOU KNOW I LOVE THAT SHIT.

- Cortana my beloved really hoping she’s okay

- Lmao Kai “you ever fire a plasma rifle? You never forget your first”

- NOOO PEREZ

- “What the hell is that?” THAT MY BOYYYYYYY YEAHHHHHH

- THE SLOMO WALK I’m crushing so hard

- oh god the people frozen in the hallways is so creepy…

- OH GOD WHAT THE FUCK THATS SO GROSS FUCKIN TUMOR ARM. THE GUARD TOO? Oh for fucks sake this is nasty

- FOR FUCKS SAKE pulling the Halsey card is wild.

- ooh she’s helping him now. AND AGAIN WHO THE HELL IS HE TALKING TO.

- “you wouldn’t understand. She knows me” what if I cried. What if I started sobbing.

- OUR GIRL SHES IN THE SYSTEMS.

- “You don’t know everything” WHAT THE HELL IS HE DOING SINCE WHEN COULD HE DO THAT. Is it because of the artifact’s in the ship?

- holy shit he’s on the Halo. And THE MUSIC. AND CORTANA MY BELOVED.

- “so nice to have you back” I LOVE THEM SO MUCH.

- “do you think it’s been waiting all that time? For you?” Alright y’all are gonna stress me out there’s too much to comprehend.

- Holy shit Kai’s crazy. “How hard could it be” well YEAH but come on. “This is gonna hurt”. NO SHIT. Jesus Christ I can’t handle this much emotional strain.

- Alright SHITS HITTING THE FAN IN COMMAND. Oop but that solves the Admiral problem!

- EUGHH THERES SO MANY. Hold up. Hold the fuck UP. Kwan is having a moment. The “Cohesion” needs to FUCK OFF.

- oh fuck. OH FUCK HALSEY HAS IT.

- GIRLY WHAT ARE YOU DOING GODDAMNIT. Ohhh. I see now. Goddamnit.

- OOOH SHIT CRAZY DUEL TIME NOW. Damn John getting his shit rocked before GETTING BACK UP LIKE A BADASS. “We’re not done” DAMN RIGHT!

- oh damn now I feel sad for the covenant homie.

- yooo okay cryofeezing Halsey that’s an idea.

- KAI. BABY GIRL OH MY GOD PLEASE BE ALRIGHT.

- “that can’t be good” well yeah if I saw several spires shoot out of mountains I’d be pretty worried too.

- Again talking to this guy? And he apparently also talks to Makee? YOO WHAT THE FUCK ITS A LITTLE ROBOT????? And the crack in his visor! I’m so confused now have those conversations been in a different time or in John’s conscience or what??

- And then the episode ends, and with it so goes my sanity.

Alright y’all, end of the season! One hell of an episode fr. Without a doubt season 2 has been a fantastic season, developing so much of this storyline in a profound way. The finale sets up for a lot to be handled in Season 3, so here’s to hoping they get the green light to make it.

John has absolutely become a favorite character of mine, and this season has only reinforced that. So much of my emotions while watching have been in empathy for John, which makes these episodes land so much harder.

And shoutout everyone who’s stuck around just for these little posts I make. I started making them just for fun but I kept up with it since y’all seemed to like it, which is cool because now I have a little catalogue of what I was thinking during the episodes that I can look at in the future. And FOR THE RECORD I’m not gonna disappear until season 3 comes out. I still need to get caught up on the storyline in the games lol.

Alright that about sums everything up I think.

*bows to an applause while a single spotlight shines on me and flowers are thrown onto the stage.*

#halo #halo tv show #john 117 #master chief #halo season 2 #halo spoilers #stream of thoughts #stream of consciousness #losing my mind

[pesterloglog]

Karkat Vantas, John Egbert

Act 4, page 1907

CG: OK IT'S A FEW MINUTES LATER.

CG: LOOK HOW SANE AND LINEAR WE ARE BEING.

EB: yeah!

CG: OK AWESOME, NOW FUCK YOU AND GOODBYE.

EB: wait!

CG: WHAT.

EB: i was just looking at all these rascals, and i was wondering...

EB: how they go back in time and become us and stuff.

EB: does it have something to do with the reckoning?

CG: HOW DO YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT.

EB: you told me.

EB: we had this great dare going.

EB: to see who could be the least helpful and informative.

EB: and you totally lost, dude!

EB: you were hella helpful.

CG: I WAS OBVIOUSLY JUST SPITING YOUR STUPID POINTLESS HUMAN DARE.

CG: WHAT IS A DARE ANYWAY, IT'S NOTHING.

CG: SOMEONE SAYS DO SOMETHING AND THEN, OH LAUGH LAUGH, YOU LOSE IF YOU DON'T DO IT.

CG: THAT ISN'T ANYTHING THAT DESERVES A WORD.

CG: WE DON'T EVEN HAVE A WORD FOR DARE IN OUR LANGUAGE.

CG: THE CLOSEST APPROXIMATION WOULD BE "WORTHLESS FUCKING BULLSHIT WASTE OF TIME FOR SILLY LITTLE CHILDREN"

EB: oh, wow.

EB: is that the title of a movie too?

CG: YES, IT'S THE TITLE OF EVERY DUMB MOVIE YOU EVER LIKED.

EB: ha ha, that isn't even true and doesn't make sense!

CG: ANYWAY, HOW COULD WE HAVE MADE A DARE IF I'M MOVING BACKWARDS ON YOUR TIMELINE.

CG: YOU WOULD DARE ME TO DO SOMETHING, THEN I WOULD DO IT NEXT TIME, BUT THEN YOU WOULDN'T EVEN REMEMBER THE DARE.

CG: BECAUSE WE DIDN'T MAKE IT YET.

CG: THAT'S WHAT ISN'T TRUE AND DOESN'T MAKE SENSE YOU DAMP BAG OF PUKE.

EB: well yeah, the dare never happened, i was joking around and made that up to give you hard time.

CG: YOU HAVE SOUNDING STUPID DOWN TO SUCH A SCIENCE.

CG: WHERE IS YOUR LAB COAT AND TEST TUBES DOCTOR BRAIN PROFESSOR?

EB: i am wearing a lab coat!

EB: sort of...

CG: YOU LOOK LIKE AN ELF.

EB: that's bullshit!

CG: YOU LOOK LIKE YOU SHOULD BE BLOWING INTO A FUNNY LITTLE SHELL, AND LIMBERING UP FOR A SILLY COOKIE DANCE.

EB: do you even have elves?

CG: YES, LET'S COMPARE WHICH FANTASY CREATURES THAT DON'T EXIST WE BOTH DO OR DON'T NOT HAVE.

CG: WHAT A GREAT FUCKING IDEA, JOHN!

EB: uh, what?

CG: YOU ASKED ABOUT THE RECKONING, SO WHY DON'T WE TALK ABOUT THAT INSTEAD OF ALL THESE PRETTY MUCH TERRIBLE THINGS.

EB: ok.

CG: YEAH, SO WHEN THE RECKONING STARTS HAPPENING, ALL THESE PARADOX CLONES GET SHIPPED OFF TO METEORS, FLUNG THROUGH SKAIAN DEFENSE PORTALS, AND SENT BACK TO EARTH.

CG: END OF STORY I GUESS.

CG: BYE.

EB: wait!!!

EB: so that means...

EB: we are all sort of like superman?

CG: UH YEAH, I GUESS.

EB: cool!

CG: YOU ALL TRACE THE MYTHOLOGICAL FOOTSTEPS OF YOUR BELOVED HUMAN SUPERMAN WHO'S REALLY JUST A MUSCULAR CAUCASIAN ALIEN.

CG: IT'S HILARIOUS HOW HUMANS WORSHIP HIM AS A PINNACLE OF HUMAN HEROISM AND VIRTUE BUT HE ISN'T EVEN HUMAN.

CG: ACTUALLY IT'S INCREDIBLY PATHETIC.

CG: BUT ALSO IN A WAY KIND OF ADMIRABLE.

CG: BECAUSE IT MEANS DEEP DOWN YOU ALL MUST REALIZE WHO YOUR DADDY IS.

CG: WE ARE, BITCHES.

EB: yeah, superman is pretty cool, i guess.

EB: did you know nicolas cage was almost going to play superman one time?

CG: OH MY THROBBING PHLEGM LOBE, WHO GIVES A BARFING FUCK ABOUT THAT.

CG: JOHN EGBERT, YOU HAVE ASSASSINATED MY PATIENCE.

CG: ADIOS LOSER.

EB: wait!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

EB: get back to me in a couple minutes, ok?

CG: SD;LKFJSD;LKFJSDLFKJ;

CG: FINE.

#homestuck #karkat vantas #john egbert #homestuck act 4 #page 1907