#and we still didnt find everything that we needed

[wickjump]

hey.

would you like to hear an xtale siblings thought?

rhetorical question.

(abuse mention bc its the fucking xtale siblings)

so. according to jakei (via cornmayors twitter), xpapyrus is "the kind of person who would harvest his own food", which is pretty cute i think. ik corn has a comic abt xasriel being into gardening, and i think theres some canon stuff that might support that, too? so yeah neat, papyrus and asriel/flowey friendship prevails!! they have a common interest/hobby, thats pretty cute, yknow?

but like. i was thinking, right? what would make xpap want to garden? not that he necessarily needs a reason, but..

and i mean the (possible) explanation is pretty damn clear. its been shown before that xgaster doesnt care abt his kids and doesnt seem to provide for them most of the time. im guessing they went hungry a lot as kids.

and like xpap has been shown to be more outspoken, defying orders and/or talking back on multiple occasions (sometimes making cross step in to "correct" him to avoid or at least soften xgasters wrath), so i think if he was hungry hed just say it, and depending on his mood xgaster would either tell him thats not his problem or begrudgingly give them something (or make xalphys go buy food or cook or whatever)

but cross? cross wouldnt say a fucking word. he could be dying of starvation and hed say hes just fine to avoid the potential punishment of "inconveniencing" xgaster

so like. im thinking. what if xpap started growing his own food because he didnt want to be so dependent on someone who couldnt be assed to provide for them? because he was tired of going hungry and being punished for trying to get the only person who could do something abt that to actually... do something? because he was tired of seeing his brother suffer in silence because he was too scared to say anything?

i can see him finding some like.. tomato seeds or something. maybe just planting a slice from food xgaster finally brought them in the hope that it grows into a plant eventually. cross would definitely help him care for the plants. maybe xalphys would occasionally bring him books about gardening or new seeds or just tell him general knowledge so he could more successfully grow things.

idk like. we see a lot of cross caring for xpap (bc of course he would, hes his older brother), but xpap explicitly caring for and providing for cross in return makes me bash my head into the wall /pos like ik thats normal. to yknow. care for and provide for your family. but god damn.

they make me violently ill.

(this was very xpap centric bc im very normal abt him (lie) hope youre ok w that)

vomits glitter everywhere youre soright..!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! also dont worry ily xpapyrus ilysm..... xpapyrus u deserved better... i love any characters from any au theyre all so cool....

UGHHHHHHHHHH i love it when younger siblings take care of the older ones,,, ugh.. .., i mean xalphys is the youngest of the three, meaning papyrus would technically be the middle sibling but yk what. that makes it better actully imo. middle sibling takes ccare of the other two.

ANYWAY yes. xpap is the most outspoken, as you said, out of them all about xgaster's mistreatment. while cross is silent and alphys is indifferent (outwardly) towards xgaster, xpapyrus is the one with the strongest sense of justice. cross is anxious, xalphys pretty much had her will to fight stripped away from her, but xpapyrus still has that spark in him, and that spark remains despite everything. he'd tell xgaster that he's hungry, because he's hungry, dammit, and if xgaster doesn't feed him, he'll take matters into his own hands. i can imagine xgaster picking a burger up for him after hours of nagging, and xpapyrus plants the whole tomato slice in a bunch of dirt in a tupperware bowl for later.

xpapyrus would defend those plants with his life if he had to because to him, as a child, i think they'd be synonymous with 'he doesn't have complete power over us. look, this is something i did on my own, something he doesn't control'. it would be the first bit of independence he's ever really had. xasriel probably helped as well because he thought it was just a fun hobby of xpapyrus' and not a means to not starve. this also probably helped cement xpapyrus and cross' loyalty to the dreemurr family,,

im ill about them too UGH.... the xtale siblings (+ chara/frisk) are my favorites ever and i just...man!!! the way xgaster abused them all in so many different ways is SO overlooked in this fandom and its my number one duty to make sure eveyrone knows how terrible xgaster is,,.!!! hes a child beater!!!!!!! cross, xpapyrus, xchara, xfrisk, and probably xalphys were beaten children!!!!!!

#rambling again #its my favorite au... xtale..wow... #xtale papyrus #xpapyrus #xalphys #xtale alphys #cross sans #xtale #underverse #utmv #undertale #xgaster #cw neglect #cw child abuse #cw child neglect

[i-cant-sing]

Me (an atheist) : Damn how am i gonna explain this one now

see i dont think i could ever be an atheist because I rely very HEAVILY on God to do miracles to solve my problems. Like I cant count the amount of times I've been pulled out of trouble when I had ZERO hope or chances of coming out alive, and then just a quick prayer to God/Allah and Im all set :)

Like this is not me trying to convince anyone to be religous or something, but like i dont think i could possibly function without God because i just need HIS HELP every single day.

Im sure if most of you sat down and recalled moments in your life where things just seemed to fall in line out of nowhere, when deep down you knew that this was more than just a random coincidence, that one problem you just couldnt find any solution to, and then BAM! Its done. Your issue is solved. Youre out of trouble. Your secret is safe.

Personally, I think that having a relationship with God is important for your mental health. Like Allah doesnt need me to praise him, thank him and stuff. I need to thank him for all the He blesses me with, because well- if I'm more grateful, wouldn't I be more blessed? Wouldnt He give me more?

Ofc its not like God hates those who arent grateful to Him, or that he takes away His blessings from people who dont thank him. There have been times that I hadnt been praying to Allah, hadnt been a good muslim, but... Allah didnt take away His blessings. He didnt punish me, He didnt even lessen His gifts. And yet, deep down, despite having everything in my life, I still felt... abnormal. Anxious. Depressed even. Maybe I felt so restless because I didnt have Allah with me. Which is weird, because why dont I have God with me? Isnt God supposed to love all his creations, his beings?

And thats when it hits you- Allah has always been there. He's still in the same spot, waiting for you- for me, to return to Him. It is me, you, the human who gets lost in worldly pleasures and moves away from God. And you know, Allah guides who He wills, so maybe thats why some of us feel restless even though we have everything. Sometimes Allah sends some trials our way, just to remind us of Him, to make us call Him for help, to run and return to Him. Sometimes Allah sends more blessings our way, so that we become more thankful, return to Him and ask for more- as is human nature.

And some of you may ask, as i did, "so if Allah only guides who He wills- if Allah has already planned everything, if He already knows everything, then why should I make an effort to do better? Maybe He made me this way? Maybe I was meant to not be guided?" and I think the answer to this is that the very fact that you're reading this post, the fact that you have such a dilemma about your relationship with God, the fact that you question your current belief system, maybe its Allah's sign for you.

I think that to do something, anything, we must first desire for it to happen. So... if you and I have this question about our relationship with God, and then develop a desire to improve this relationship, then maybe it is God's will to guide us.

Nothing happens without His will, so this post reaching your dashboard, you reading this despite knowing by the first two paragraphs that this is not a fic, this was Allah's will, hm?

#i would like to know everyones thoughts on this #atheist or not everyone can reply

[topaziraphale]

"Stop saying Crowley won't help Aziraphale in S3 he'd go back to him in a HEARTBEAT and nothing would stop him" I get it no one likes the idea of Crowley being bitter after what happened for a long period of time but like can we at least acknowledge that he's currently going through probably the most emotional pain in his life since falling? Can we agree that he's opened his heart entirely - something you couldn't pay him to do unless the world is literally ending and he's desperate - to Aziraphale, and got shot down? Can we understand that he did it AGAIN only to lose Aziraphale again? Not that what Aziraphale did isn't without Crowley's own shortcomings (hiding the truth of Heaven's cruelty from him) but like,,,,

The appeal here isn't Scorned Crowley Doesn't Love Aziraphale Anymore, or Never Wants To Help Him Again, the appeal here is Crowley learning enough self respect to not just walk back right to Aziraphale like nothing happened after Aziraphale has had a pattern of consistently refusing him. Going years ping-ponging between "We're not friends I don't even know him" to "That's what friends are for right?" and "We're friends, why would you even say anything?" and "Friends? We're not friends. We are an angel and a demon!"

Like I get it, Crowley is a heartbreakingly forgiving person. Of course he's gonna forgive Aziraphale, I'll be surprised if he didn't forgive him by the time he walked out the bookshop door, but gdi he could at least grant himself the luxury of being at least a little irritated for longer than however long it takes to make a globe and some books float and angrily cry out to God in his flat. But due to the change of pace and dynamic that is establishing part of the conflict for Season 3, I just really like the idea of him for ONCE prioritizing himself and being like "Okay, fine. We'll get back at it when you're ready, then," instead of just taking Aziraphale back like his words and actions meant nothing to him, when clearly they have an effect on him.

What is Aziraphale going to learn if Crowley just accepts what he did so quickly, like he always has the entire time they've been friends? Idk maybe I'm just projecting too much darkness on their dynamic but I mean, if the pattern of Aziraphale pushing Crowley away/disrespecting him one day and then being fine with his friendship the next + Crowley never stopping to be like "Hey, that's not cool, at least give me a little credit" or smth was fine all along and will continue to be fine in the future, then why, after 6,000 years of being friends and loving this demon, can Aziraphale still not accept that Crowley is just fine the way he is, and instead got excited to promote him to an angel in a heartbeat once the opportunity presented itself? You can't blame all of it on Heaven when Aziraphale has demonstrated his free will/defiance to Heaven so many times. Or, I don't know, I guess maybe we can? Maybe I'm just craving too much angst to the point where I'm letting it cloud my analysis of canon. Idk.

#derpy speaks #good omens #good omens 2 #no i dont think crowley is gonna ever hate aziraphale for what happened but he's allowed to be angry #he's allowed to be done with it all. he's allowed to be exhausted. just look at his face when he drives away. #meh. idk. but i dont know how i'll feel if crowley just INSTANTLY accepts aziraphale back in a situation involving #idk - ''hey help me stop the new apocalypse'' #at least. without like. SOME pushback? it can even be something small like ''are you SURE you want ME to help you? do you really need me?'' #doesnt have to be a straight refusal but i'd like SOME kind of action to show that crowley is putting his foot down for once #he deserves that self respect #do NOT reply saying that im insinuating that aziraphale is actively malicious or doing it on purpose. #everything he has done up until now is his own complicated response to all the trauma and guilt he's been through #but despite that crowley is STILL allowed to be upset... it's messy. i can write a whole paper about how this whole thing #is just unfortunate on both ends. again. we didnt get queerbaited we got communication baited 😭 #but help me out here. am i just too fandom-brained to have these expectations from the story? #is there something obvious im missing that is making me sound like a complete asshole here? do i need to get my head out of the gutter? #someone please explain it to me if so because whatever it is‚ i can't find it #not queued

[lollytea]

Huntlow situationship gives me such intense brain termites you don't get it

#no i dont think its because Hunter needs time to heal first #i think if it was up to Hunter they would plunge into a committed romantic relationship immediately after the events of the finale #he would propose to her in like. 3 months probably #i know that sounds intense but i think this is what ''i literally died and came back to life'' mania does to a guy #he is so carpe diem minded hes become a little insane. he wants everything #no more waiting around. no more hesitating. he cant afford to do that anymore #would it have been the wise decision to enter a romantic relationship immediately #who's to say. but Hunter would have done it without thinking about it #its Willow that makes the decision to slow down and wait a while before they make any committments theyre not ready for #i dont think she's entirely learned her lesson about letting herself be emotionally reliant every once in a while #shes made progress but the events of ftf were such heat of the moment responses #once things are semi-stable she still needs to adapt to acknowledging that her feelings for Hunter are like. serious. and scarily intense #so like. yea Willow is slamming her pedals on the breaks for both their sakes. shes thinking about how this would effect Hunter too #but also. she scawwed. #when Willow tells him she wants to talk and she's like ''i think we should just be friends'' oh the face he makes is DEVASTATED #he didnt expect it was going in this direction at all. but like. once Willow explains how this is the most reasonable decision for now #he DOES agree. he understands what shes saying and he agrees that it's the best decision to take a breather before they jump into a romance #anyway even when theyre not officially dating the flirting continues insistently. they are very obsessed with each other and cant stop #Willow keeps trying to insist to herself that its just messing around. nothing serious. they find each other hot. its fine to kiss a little #but Hunter makes it very hard when he looks at her with big brown labrador eyes. looks at her like shes the entire world #i think if it was up to Willow they would have been trapped in that uncertain limbo forever. shes too scared to take the plunge #even if she wants to. she badly wants to #but Hunter just wont let that happen. every so often he says ''im ready whenever you are'' #he makes his intentions very known. he is not the shy boy from Camila's house anymore #Willow cant just playfully flirt with him without worrying that hes gonna reciprocate. he talks now. he expresses himself #shes a little afraid of that. but she adores it too. he makes her feel safe but also he wont let her stay in this comfort zone #hes giving her the push she needs to pursue this relationship. gives her to push to feel like she can go after what she wants #because god knows HE knows what he wants #they make me so insane

[cocolacola]

do not even talk to me about any "my fav is doomed by the narrative" shit unless u witnessed the Sylvanas Incident of 2018-2022 because that was my final straw

#infodump in tags #not even the narrative. she was doomed by the narraTORS #Edge of Night is one of the most powerful and beautiful works ever added to the WoW canon. #and then it got retconned for alien lava worms. all because we needed a way to get to the shadowlands. #a truly morally gray character turned into this weird poster figure for some antagonistic force the writers werent sure how to handle yet #i am actively exploring the reality where EoN is still canon and she never became warchief #i miss her bickering with garrosh it was such interesting tension for the horde and also was a very interesting way to characterize her #like how she stuck up for kul tirans and didnt approve of the theramore attack but still did everything she did to gilneas #THAT was some REAL ethically questionable shit that i will actually find interesting. #not whatever the fuck bfa/sl was. #she makes me so sad. #warcraft #sylvanas windrunner

[zevrans]

.

#it's my last shift in 2 days and then i'm leaving this job i'm actually so happy i no longer has to work there! 🎉 #i need to find a new one asap of course but i never had energy to do so on my off days so i'll focus on that now #i've endured the hardest shifts with freezing -25-30 °C where the heater conditioner did absolutely nothing #shifts with the roof leaking trying to not let the orders of customers get wet constantly wiping shelves throughout 2 days on top #of everything i has to do #these past 2 days sewage system froze and i had no water to wash my hands or use the restroom properly..🤦‍♀️ #i know the wet hand wipes are bad for ecology but man they continously saved me and also i had to wash my hands using water from kettle and #i had to do it outside freezing of course because the sink and restroom are in another building and i didnt have time to constantly walk #there.. and this on top of 2 last weeks of december being especially batshit crazy stressful and having heated karen encounters each shift. #and it was so hard on me because i am a nonconfrontational person and i don't like arguing with people #but i learned so much in these months of working there and for that experience i am still grateful :") #it's bittersweet that i won't see the friendly regulars that were always kind to me anymore tho 😔 and my coworker came yesterday #and we spoke for like an hour or so and he said he is is sad that i'm leaving because i'm such a nice person and a great coworker 🥺 #ngl this made me sad too but life goes on.. he said he'll be leaving in a month too #said he didn't think that i'll leave first 😂 #i woke up almost an hour ago from 3 bg3 related dreams in a row btw 😂🤦‍♀️ i need to play 🙈 ok i need to get up first..��� #tbd

[andragoras-in-vanity]

i got a new mug and a face mask today, i am so tired but lets call it self care and not what it is (poor spending habits while unemployed).

#winnie the pooh #agender #glasses #sorry #fibro #cfs #find the little things and let them make you happy cause everything else...is..exhausting. #i needed this and we should all just be glad i didnt get the other mug too okay #but also when i hold it in my left hand as i usually do #tigger is visible and that makes me so happy he was always my favourite yes i cried during the christopher robin movie #when he bounced out and started singing his little tigger song #bawled like a baby and got made fun of for it ON MY BIRTHDAY IT CAME OUT ON MY BIRTHDAY AND THEY WERE STILL MEAN TO ME OVER IT #but my skin feels so nice rn #its so soft and smooth and not super dry rn #i feel amazing and i wish i could afford this all the time

[snaileo]

honestly if i could i would quit my job right now and try to make my art work again , at least to help cover some bills before finding a new job because im just so tired

#the apartment is falling apart and we need to get it clean but my dad and i are just so exhausted #and making my art or comms work is just a dream bc i cant even draw rn with everything #and like i wish i didnt have to be in a position to find a new job rn but my current one is going down the drain #like if i could just have a month off to get everything back on track #that would be great but thats not possible at all #when i have free time my brain either wants to be asleep or distracted by playing a game #when if i could just get it to want to be distracted by cleaning #that would be great #like we still havent done anything about cleaning her room or going thru her stuff - not that theres a time limit on that #idk im just rambling

[jvzebel-x]

🦋

#i still havent been able to get the pic of my entire family celebrating the holidays together out of my head. #my parents ruined every christmas they could. every holiday. every birthday. everything. there could be nothing special #w/o my dad calling my mother a fat pig or my mom interrupting his dinner prayer to call him a lying hypocrite. #w/o police getting involved&having to explain why my dad had my mom in a headlock or my mom had punched him in the face. #we could have nothing bc their need for misery outweighed their desire to give their children any fucking joy #every fucking time. #but i have to sit here&wonder if im in the wrong bc im being gaslit into missing a family+memories we all know damn well #never fucking happened. i blacked out half my fucking childhood&still know thats true. #i have to wonder if maybe-- just maybe-- they would actually apologize for everything they did if i ever called or wrote. #if maybe they would welcome me back w/o expecting an apology From Me. #but then i remember how the first thing my mother said when getting in touch w me after two years was how disappointed she was in me #for not thinking to tell anyone in the family that i was homeless. how selfish i was for it. #how she only contacted me after getting my email address-- the same one ive had since high school-- from family #bc shed been crying to our entire extended family about how worried she was about me so they managed to find my gofundme #&not a single person in my family donated to it-- but they all had a lot to say about it. didnt they. #&somehow i know that theres nothing for me w any of them. nothing at all but more disappointment. #&photos of all of them smiling that i have to remind myself are definitely not real. #bc how many of those exact photos had i been in? no matter what the answer is i dont remember a single one being real.

[476b]

.

#hm well. #i finally cut ties with the guy ive been seeing for the past 14 months #since im moving and im not his primary partner anyways even thiugh he was mine #and so it isnt even a real Breakup i just told him i didnt want to keep hooking up #because i need something more than what we have and if i have him to fall back on i wont be as commited to really finding someone #hes respectful and agrees and everything is fine #except that it still hurts really bad #like i let go of a leaky liferaft in open water #it wasnt great but it was the best i had #but its fine #i plan on having fun this month #and seeing old friends and making new ones #and ill be happy again soon #i should have done this months ago but... i like him.....

[piplupod]

people defending their precious white man of the week and ignoring BIPOC pointing out his racism Yet Again. i'm so tired. i'm so tired. i'm so tired!!!!!!

#im literally shaking right now im so fucking mad #''he's not racist what are u talking about show me proof'' #[one google later] oh wow i found all this proof with literally one attempt at googling. crazy. i wonder why u couldnt find that on ur own #and then they say ''no he said this thing so its fine :)'' i go look at the thing. it is white saviourism. again. as always #''he's keeping the culture alive :)'' he is twisting it beyond recognition actually. he just took it and ran with it. #and now he's trying to cover his ass! #and white ppl will just eat that shit up lmfao. #''wow what a mature response'' says his adoring audience and his response is literally just ''i can do what i want bc im white'' #i will not get involved in the replies of a post. but man. i'm fucking livid. literally shaking right now. #im so fucking tired of anti-indigenous racism being brushed aside like it doesnt matter #yall just bulldozed us all over and then tried to wipe us out when we didnt respect yall and now you continue to fuck us over #and then get upset when we try to say we would like A FEW THINGS TO OURSELVES. INCREDIBLE #the white ''i need access to everything all the time no matter what'' attitude is SOOOO blatant #this isnt even going into his antisemitism lmfaoooo #literally a list a mile long and ppl still plug their ears and close their eyes and yell LALALALA IM NOT LISTENINGGGG #also here's your necessary ''not all white people''. i know. i'm aware. theres some good ones sure but they shouldnt need to be coddled #and reassured every time somebody complains about white people general behaviour. let me complain!!! its a pattern of behaviour!! #pippen needs 2nd breakfast

[tboyautism]

the idea of forearm crutches is. so nice. i feel relief just thinking about them.

#i have no idea how to fo about mobility aids #for context: im unmedicated right now. conpletley. #after an mri didnt find any swelling they took me off my meds cause my arthritis seemed like it wasnt active #granted now everything hurts more and is somehwta swollen #pain clinic in several months and im suspected for having fibro or another pain amplification disorder #but god #my hips and knees are so bad walking has become so painful #stairs jesus christ #i have to go up them every day for school and i dread ir #my physical therapist also thinks im ready to graduate from physical therapy #because of how strong ive gotten #and the initail reasoning for me to not get a cane or anything was because we were focusing on strengthening my body #but everything still hurts. lol. #the idea of being able to put my weight on something other than my knees sounds so nice #im so tired #ugh #fibro #arthritis #disabled #tagging this because i kind of need advice

[nomaishuttle]

uninstalled all the dating apps which ws like 8nof them . in the morning ill tell the guys i was talking to that i overestimared how ready i was and hopefully theyll understand andnjust drop it

#i dont feel stable enough for like . any relationship platonic or romantic andnit fucking..rly sucks bc i want to have friends but like #with what happened with daj the other day im like. i dont think i can be like . idk. ik daj said it was ok and she understood but im so #upset that i lashed iut abt that and i keep trying to get into therapy but i fucking..cant find one. at all #im trying to be more reasonable witj mymoney and i know like. i need therapy bc i Need to work this out and i am not able to work it out #with myself. i need to see a professional abt this . so ik it wouldnt be frivolous to spend money on a therapist if i cant find one in #network. bc the in network thrapists dont accept/dont specialize in working with patients with bpd which i like. thats..my issue. im almost #posiitive. ive done a lot of research and it matches up with like . all of my experiences #ik everybody feels unstable after a breakup buti genuinely like. i dont feel whole. and im looking back on how i treated myself and thiught #abt the relationship and its like. i stopped talking to all my friends i stopped talking to my family i literally dropped out of school i #moved across the country i dropped any interest that we didnt share i literally like. i gave up fucking everything and thats not. healthy. #and he never aksed me for that and its not fair of me to resent him for me doing that bc he nevrr asked me to #but i feel like. everytime i think abt him it feels like im being torn in half like . i put him on so incredibly high of a pedestal i #literally thought of him as perfect that was..recurring. and when i was upset with him i took it out on myself horrifically and thats not #normal . and jow thinking abt him literally physucally hurts bc theres still that part of me that thinks hes perfect and that im a mistake #and a failure and i didnt Be connor right. and then theres a part of me that . doesnt think of him that way #and its just like. aughhf. even outside that relationship im looking back on past friendships and how like..obsessive i get with them #and then when they 'betray' me i just. immediately turn on them and like. thats not normal.. #and my sense of identity is um. Well you guys have seen. you know. #ive looked into it a lot and i rly think i have it and im not like. 100% positive but i feel like even if i dont itd be good to work with a #therapist who Has experience with that. since the experience is so similar. yk. idk #i just feel insane and i feel like bod would make like. so much of my life and the way i act and the way i react to things like..it makes #sense when i look at it as if i have bpd. and if i dont it literally seems completely irrational and erratic like. IDK. so basically i need #a therapist who can work with that but none of the ones in network specialize in that and then i was researching and found out a lot of #therapists specifically Dont work with bpd patients and like. judge their peers who do for woriing with bod #which is 1. Actually disgusting 2. Straight up stupid 3. Terrifying. so i only want to work with a therapist whi explicitely says I #specialize and work with patients with bpd 👍 but i literally could only find 1 and theyre out of network and its 15p for visit and id #prefer to do weekly visits if possible but thats . 300 per paycheck for therapy . biweekly itd be better but thats still 150. and i have to #save up for the trip home and then the new apartment immediately after #and i have to get credit card . #and in an ideal world id hold off on the therapist until i get my new apartment so that i can fully focus on coping with myself and learnin

[scattered-winter]

as lonely as being aro can be I honestly wouldn't have it any other way because as a kid I felt like my life would be over in my 20s once I married and started having kids but the first time I realized I didn't have to do that shit was akin to a bird getting released from its cage

#like idk. i remember watching my mom growing up. no time to read or paint or sing or do anything she wanted to do #because she was always doing chores and housework and taking care of the kids #and she said she chose that life and was happy with it but it felt like a cage to me every time i thought about it #and in the ''religion'' i grew up in anyone with ovaries was supposed to get married and have lots of babies as soon as they could #so yk. 20s. #and as a kid growing up in that environment i Literally thought i would only get to live for 20/25 years #and then i'd be miserable and locked inside the house for the rest of my life #and all my friends growing up Wanted that !! they wanted marriage and a million kids and all the things we were told we needed to have #and im sure a lot of this was just the culture we grew up in. even now after leaving years ago im still struggling to unlearn things #and as kids ?? we didnt know Anything. #but idk. i remember watching brave and connecting with merida so much because i didnt want to get married either !!! #but i thought i had to !!! literally that movie made me cry so many times fr #but finding out what aromanticism was was literally so insane it was like. i dont have to do any of this bullshit actually. #it was literally the most radical thought i'd ever encountered at the time #it felt like i was defying everything i've been taught and it took me a long time to separate myself from the mindsets i grew up with #and then longer still to eventually separate myself from that environment completely #but idk. im a little lonely sometimes and my siblings and friends are all getting married and paired off #but i dont have to. my life isnt over and i can live it however i want. #idkkkkkkkk im feeling kinda emotional rn. being aro is incredible fr #winter speaks #queer #personal

[magnoliamyrrh]

i also love how this whole generation discusses enthusiastic consent and consent which isnt coerced at all and etc etc etc but they cant understand how consent cant be bought, especially when were talking abt +95% of cases of harsh poverty related prostitution. like. what the fuck is not clicking (why am i even asking whats not clicking; its that theyre literally so fucking afraid to think for themselves and to even question the dominant narratives theive been parroting that their entire brains just shut down ((because even questioning these things already makes you the worst person ever in the groups they hang out in)) just repete the mantra babes! sex work is work! just repete the mantra, mindlessly! you say something enough times and it becomes true!)

#its scary man like. apart from everything...... i find it straight up fucking scary #...... were adults now. these people are adults. and yet they still.... like im sorry to say it but so much of this generation #is just sheep #i love actual sheep but this isnt cute its really not #its fucking scary #this generation is SO EASY to manipulate and will fall SO EASILY for cult tactics i swear to god #a whole bunch of people who parrot everything and who are terrified to be even analytical of things much less critical. is exactly what we #dont need #which as i said before is part of why i post about this. because look! im saying all the things that arent allowed and make me an evil #bitch! lmao. except wait my fingers didnt turn to ash my tongue didnt fall out and i didnt suddenly become the devil #anon hate? okay. so? a bunch of westerners irl who dont know shit who are mad at me? okay? so? #the thought crime police can sentence me to 1000 years in jail if they want but it doesnt seem to have worked so far

[rexscanonwife]

Work got me fucked up but know that I'm always ALWAYS on that loving Rex forever and always grind too 🥺🥺💖💖💕💕

#brie babbles #self insert talk #💙 oh captain my captain 💙 #SCREAMING AND CRYING TONIGHT CAUSE THE FEELINGS ARE STRONG #im thinking about how much we GO THROUGH together ; w ; #lately ive been thinking about like...the repercussions tbh #like during the war there were probably lots of times where rex just needed to be held and allowed to cry #and to be the one that he trusts to /break down/ in front of #even though it takes a while for him to accept it #he can finally let out those feelings. that grief. that anger and sadness #he can let me catch it in my hands and help him put it to rest #because he never needed to be tough all the time for me. i always knew that he was the strongest even when he didnt feel it #for continuing to fight and to keep going on and being the best person he could be for his brothers that still lived #there were lots of times where we were all alone in my room and he was allowed to just cry and be held and kissed #until he felt at least a little bit lighter #but then order 66 happens and we BOTH lose everything #and we spend a few months without each other feeling like there was nothing left #and then we FIND EACH OTHER again and suddenly there's hope again #but it still doesnt mean we dont break down and have to lean on each OTHER from time to time and now we can do that #we can be rocks for each other and rebuild everything we lost #and through everything we ALWAYS had the love we shared #ok tag rambling over i gotta sleep ajfjgjf