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#anyway i dont rly have plans to continue this i kinda just started making it to cope with some bad things
quodekash · 1 year
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i ran out of images in the first part (to no ones surprise) BUT IM HERE NOW, CONTINUING THE EPISODE
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...All The Times They Didn't Kiss - AU Edition?
"you might as well submit a love request" PLSSS GUN HAS SO MUCH MORE CONFIDENCE THAN TINN COULD EVER HAVE
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that's the wrong finger, buddy
HELL YES MV TIME
...well thats kinda boring
they just growl lightly at each other instead of the chinzhilla tribute
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THANK YOU PORRRR
EVERYONE SAY THANK YOU POR, TOGETHER NOW
THANK YOU POR
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HIS LITTLE "whee" AS HE JUMPED DOWN- BRJDFG I LOVE HIM
HIS NEURODIVERGENCE IS STRONG
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i can see inside gun's brain rn
hes like 'dont freak out dont freak out dont freak out this is normal this is fine I WANT TO KISS HIM- no shhhh, calm calm calm you are calm breathe in and out, in and out, aaaaAAAAAAA-'
"it makes you feel warm as if im hugging you all the time" GERJDGN
I LOVE HOW MUCH CONFIDENCE THIS TINN HAS
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soundwin standing next to each other 👀
i love the recreations of some of my favourite lines but from different voices, this is very funky
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hes so... cool now. there's no other word for it.
SOUNDS SILLY LITTLE HEAD BOP GJERNDGJ I LOVE HIM TOO MUCH
TINNSOUND HEADBANGING!! GEORSGL
I LOVE SEEING TINN JUST BEING SILLY AND DANCING AROUND THE STAGE AND HAVING A GOOD TIME
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hes too precious
we need to protect por at all costs
i love him so much
pls it takes me so long to watch these, im on 2/4 and its already 12:40am
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Neurodivergent Bird Sit
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TIW FIDGETING WITH HIS HOODIE BLANKET
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this is so strange
tinn being reprimanded
por and gun standing on the side of the principal's desk
gim the principal
photjanee the concerned and awesome mother
sound standing at the desk next to tinn
win standing behind, part of the group but not really, kind of new to this, keeping a stoick expression with his arms crossed
its strange
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bro if people would start randomly playing live music during class time i think most classes would celebrate
i know i would
live music is awesome
and that song is a banger
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THE MOTHER SOLIDARITY OMG
WE HAD MISSED OPPORTUNITIES FOR PHOTJANEE/GIM FRIENDSHIP
I WANT TO SEE THEM GIRLBOSSING AND SLAYING AND BEING INCREDIBLE AMAZING MOTHERS AND WOMEN
PHOTJANEE WAS ALREADY ICONIC AND NOW SHES EVEN MORE ICONIC I LOVE HER SO FREAKING MUCH
"i needed to close the shop to handle you here! you keep causing trouble. i told you, didn't i? do whatever you want but dont put me in trouble" HONESTLY? GO OFF QUEEN
"wont you fight for me mum?" "i wont! im not as kind as those mums in the series!" im so sorry maam, i hate to break it to you, but you... you're a mum in one of those series
KIND PRINCIPAL, STRICT MOTHER, I LOVE THIS
CLOSING THE CLUB FOR ONE YEAR???? JEEZ DUDE, NEVER MIND ABOUT THE KIND PRINCIPAL THING
gun's very vague plan which is the exact plot of the canon series, but bc hes gun hes explaining it very haphazardly to por and its very funny
"your baby" "...why are you so eager to speak in english?" "why? i can do so. im good at it, whats your problem" first of all, iconic. second, yes youre very very good i love you youre amazing and better than most english speakers (i know he only said two words, shut up, i need por to know hes doing good). third, im desperately hoping this is somehow related to something tiwpor
im rly rooting for more canonical tiwpor in this au
maybe some handholding
perhaps a cheek kiss
possibly even a kiss kiss (PLEASE P'AU)
"love while lighting the candle is like going to school in the rain" did the quote change or was this a translation error. cos thats not what tiw said.
OHH OKAY POR SAID IT WRONG
"it's the same anyway. i just said it backward, not a big deal. it's a mix of languages, you know. im not good at thai, im not fluent" interesting (picture the fish on my icon stroking my chin) very interesting
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THE OTHERS' INSTRUMENTS
i think
are those all just gun's dad's?
i mean tinn's dads
this is confusing
in this scenario is tinn's dad still an author aspiring musician?? or is he a musician? or is tinn's dad dead in this scenario but gun's isnt?? explanations pls and ty
or is that sound's electric guitar and yo's acoustic and stuff
gosh freaking darnnit im tired again, why does my body keep doing that to me
im gonna post this and go to bed and finish it like. tomorrow afternoon.
gejbsegdh i really feel like im gonna feel like im missing out but i cannot keep my eyes open
goodnight folks, i hope you all enjoyed the episode! bye byeeeee
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oworii · 3 years
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//hey kids ready for some angst(tm) ?
heres a bad end thingy :)
(long post, 15 images)
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//this is what i have in mind when i say sunny’s emotions are ugly
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squidsisterscallie · 4 years
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some Haru stuff
my joker was named Akira!
i knew Makoto more then in canon before joining the phantom thieves, idk if i would've called us friends but she was the closest thing i had to one before everything
i went to a college in Tokyo! it was close enough that i continued to live at home while attending, tho unless i was gardening i spent most of my free time at LeBlanc's
Sojiro and Akira gave me coffee making lessons... Sojiro would let me help out! and i taught myself a lot of those like fancy coffee tricks, like making the little foam animals and stuff! honestly i loved "working" there and if Takakura had let me work at the café i would've dropped outta school to do so, that and gardening were all i wanted to do really
oh! Ann and Shiho were dating, Ann brought her along to activities or LeBlanc's on occasion and she was really lovely
yeah i think my canon mostly follows the game, i know i was a lot more generous w my money tho and i honestly just didn't have a scale to understand it absksna it'd be like, "oh Akira let me pay for your subway fare" [gives him 10x the amount he needs]
oh and Akira didn't leave, his blood family just kinda didn't care abt him? so when he told them he was staying they were just kinda like yeah w/e dont get in anymore trouble. !
and Im pretty sure i majored in horticulture and minored in business, originally planned on doing it the other way around bc i rly did want to help out w Okumura Foods but had the realisation that i had the comfort if guaranteed work when finishing school anyway, so why not focus on the thing i love instead
i would frequently try and help Sojiro out w his finances but he would 99% of the time refuse, even tho i would tell him i had more money then i knew what to do with. anyway at one point me and futaba set up a little scheme (100% futabas idea) were she told Sojiro that she had started freelance coding to earn some money for herself/to help out (which he was still hesitant to take but he couldn't really say no to her most of the time) but it was really just me helping out ahajaha i think futaba might've actually taken up the work at some point tho bc I don't think you ever went to school in my canon, not physically at least, she definitely did get her like high school qualifications tho
Kasumi wasn't around in my canon at all either
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monohart · 5 years
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stardust. (idol!au)
ft. huang renjun, failure and a secret relationship.
i’m back after a long break, haha. this was an old writing that had been sitting up in my drafts for a while... happy 2019! please spend this year showing more love to renjun. :)
thank you, and enjoy!
when you were cut from the line up for sm’s new group renjun was 100 times more devastated then u were
u were like hey rj cmon don’t worry i’ll be fine??? i’m sure i can audition for another company or smth?? or wait for the next unit debut??
u even jokingly said maybe u could debut in an nct unit but he couldn’t bring himself to smile
and your chest :(( hurt :(( from seeing him so hurt ;;;
ofc for as long as you remember y’all had been talking about both debuting under sm at the same time so y’all could be chasing your dreams and not be too far away from each other
but that plan failed when renjun debuted first with nct dream and had his schedule Packed w nct promotions and concerts and stuff
he and the other nct guys would sometimes let u sit behind the camera in vlives
this one time omg
(( ok so refer to this for a visual :) ))
u sat behind the camera in the chenle jaemin renjun react to baby don’t stop vlive
even though u were hella scared to be kicked out chenle was like HEY DW I’LL FIGHT ANYONE WHO THINKS YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO BE THERE OKAY
so u snuck out of your practice session slightly earlier to watch them
renjun was so excited u were there but obvs he had to keep it together for the live
then!! lolololol rip your manager found out u snuck out of practice and found u in the room and pulled u out of the room
(u kno that moment when they all looked behind the camera and then turned down the music.. yeah issa bc ur crazy manager almoST ruined the mood)
manager scolded u outside the room for a good few minutes and then told u to get yourself together
and u stood outside the room for a bit longer after manager left
and u were literally about to leave but then guess who u ran into!!!
chittaphon knew about u and rj since the day he met u and him both
it was kinda funny really bc u and rj stood rly awkwardly next to each other at this company event a few years ago and y’all were standing around the other dreamies and some other trainees and suddenly renjun’s hand brushed the side of your leg and u glance at him and he smiles at u and u look away smiling
AND chittaphon, who happens to be taking a nice long sip of his soda SEES THIS and spits his soda out
accidentally sprays soda onto jeffery’s back
but yeah thats another story
anyway!!!!
ten sees u sulking outside the door and peers in and sees renjun and hears bds
u know that smile smirk ten does when he knows whats Up™.
yeah he does that and be like
“eyy why don’t u go in???”
then u give him a breakdown of what happened with skipping practice and being caught by the manager
and hes like :o
but chittaphon is chittaphon so he grabs you by the wrist and pulls you back into the practice room and hides you in a corner just out of view
and then he sneaks onto them!!
then jaemin... quick-eyed, lovely doe-eyed jaemin... sees u hiding and nudges renjun ever so slightly
he sees u and before he gets flustered ten’s all over him asking how the mv was and flustered rj tries to keep his cool while showering chittaphon w compliments
and u know how ten looks at him like That :^)
and jaemin keeps peeking over their shoulders
yeah :))
OK I SPENT TOO LONG DESCRIBING THIS
but anyway, on that night u were cut from the line up
after the news got to him he sits down and was just like
:(
because he knew how much debuting meant to u and
and... YOUR DREAMS TO BE TOGETHER :(( debuting together and always being close to each other
and u mentioned before that if u dont debut in the next five years u prolly would quit the entertainment industry
maybe go back to school and study some or idk work in a less chaotic industry
in that moment he remembered what u said and was a little heartbroken too
he tried to find you in your usual practice room but u weren’t there and he shouldn’t be loitering around so he gave up and let you have some space
bet u he sulked all the way home
you had travelled back to your dorm because u needed some time alone oof
it took u a good few hours to deal with the news and when u were ready to talk about it again, it was like 3am but u still gave his mobile a call
he picked up on the second ring and said to meet him outside your dorm in a few mins and y’all can go take a walk or smth for some fresh air
so u guys go to the park for a nice quiet walk in the dead of night hhh
u had so many things to say but mostly u were worried with your relationship w him and how y’all were supposed to balance that out given his priorities with nct and you as... just a trainee...
u didnt have to explain anything or other bc he suddenly goes
“what if we went public with our relationship?”
u look up at his face that was hidden behind a mask and his glasses
u deadass thought he was kidding but his that look in his eyes were like hella serious
“just think about it for a second. maybe we don’t have to bring it to the fans, but at least let the company know”
and u were like no way they’ll just do anything to keep yall apart
he didnt answer after that and not too long later yall started heading back to your dorm
it was almost 5am and the streets were still dark and renjun had an arm around your waist and you leant against him and yall walked slowly bc honestly u guys haven’t slept a wink and its been a Really Long day
your dorm was a street away from his
actually he stops about a street or two away from your dorm bc another idol group also lived in the same building as u and there were always sasaengs and people w cameras outside your dorm
u were a trainee so it didnt bother u but renjun was renjun :,)
plus he actually wanted sum privacy so he could kiss u.. so...
hsaksdnd
there was a narrow alley just around the back of the apartment block next to yours
u would never go there alone kasdnj it was scary at any time of the day
tbh
u wouldn’t go even if someone was there with u
maybe it was the heat of the moment or u were just so down that day
it didn’t rly bother u when renjun gently backed u up against the wall and hugged u n took off his mask n buried his face in the crook of ur neck
and that immediately put a smile on your face ur like baby wyd its 5am
hes looks at u like :(( and says “i miss u” in a quiet quiet voice & in his mother tongue
u knew what it meant and hearing him say it in chinese made you uwu to mars
then he showers u with like tiny tiny butterfly kisses and he wraps his arms around u to make u feel safe and warm
which u do!!
he holds u up too when ur knees buckle a bit but then just continues kissing u hehehe
its all sweet and innocent but his kisses last just a tiny bit longer each time, as if hes scared that you’d run away
after he finishes kissing u he meets your eyes and u literally watch his orbs go all soft and he hides his face in your neck again while u mutter about how much of a big baby he is
the goodnight was!!!
the hardest thing y’all had to do omg
he literally didnt want to let u go
and when he did and when u started walking toward ur building u kept looking back, wanting him to head off but he didnt and stood there waiting for u to go in
and u didnt want to go in without knowing he was on his way home and was safe on the walk back wdf it was almost 6am
then when u were almost at the door u saw he hadn’t moved an inch
so u run back to him
he was still standing at the spot where y’all parted - which was a few streets down and out of sight
he scolds u for running back out but he smiles when doing so and u snap his mask back onto his face and kisses him over the mask like 200 times and u couldnt see but hes like dying from the giggles
anyway eventually y’all go home :,) it just took forever :,)
the next day u head to the building in the afternoon to catch up on some sleep
u were a bit guilty to find out renjun went back to work at 7am which meant he practically didnt get any sleep
y’all brush shoulders in the cafeteria but he was walking w hyuck and his manager so u couldn’t stop and chat
tho u couldn’t help but notice his manager steal a glance at u when u walked by and he had this really weird smile on his lips
made u go like huh.,, maybe he recognises me from the many Brief encounters yall had before
anyway u were doing some vocal and keyboard practice later in the afternoon when the door to the private training suite opened and two loud boys stumbled in
made u rly surprised bc u never expected it to be them??
it was taeyong and winwin??
they were both looking at u like :))) as if they did something great :))
taeyong introduces himself formally but you’re like ,, um u know we’ve met before at this function and hes like OH,,, sorry
anyway they were there to tell u how renjun couldn’t shut up about u since he went back to the dorm last night and now all of nct knows about everything to know about u and him (if they hadn’t already)
you’re just like .,, oof what embarrassing stuff did he say
they’re like NO ALL NICE STUFF,, a bit cringey at times
but !! nct wanted to help u
so earlier today
johnny and jaehyun spoke to their managers and night night producers and asked if they could hire a third radio dj - yknow someone who also speaks english and is really nice and entertaining and funny and cool like u are!!
that idea is now In The Talks
winwin brought up a variety thing china line and their managers had been thinking about for a while and also asked if they could consider u
nct managers be like ok so who actually is this trainee and why are all 18 boys obsessively asking to include her in nct activities
later that day when u see renjun again he was just heading off but he came around your practice room to see u before he left
thankfully u were the only one left at practice as the others were away busy preparing for their debut or smth :,)
u didnt hear him come in bc u were sitting in the middle of the room on the floor scrolling replying to week old texts oop hehe
renjun sneaks up behind u and hugs u from behind and kisses your cheek
he got a bit scared when u didn’t respond as explosively as he thought... for a second he thought he got the wrong person poor bean he was so nervous hhh
you chuck your phone aside and tackle him and he falls onto his back and yall kinda lay there on the ground for a bit
and you told him about taeyong and winwin visiting u and he just smiles
“you inspire me.”
“me? inspire you? you’re huang freakin’ renjun, and i, of all people, inspire you?”
“yeah”
“don’t understand u sometimes”
he turns his head to look at u and u turn to look at him and he kinda just admires you for a while then reach over and touches your cheek
it wasnt even a sweet caress or anything he literally just
touched
your cheek
“renjun what the heck”
then he laughs and u laugh and u snuggle against him and for the first time that week both of u feel completely at ease bc even though the dream u guys shared at the beginning was completely shattered,
y’all would still find a way around it
and knowing so many people around u still supported u guys meant so much
especially to renjun bc u were his everything and he’d do anything for u
and i mean it!!!
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hyungkyun · 6 years
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(^:
HENLO!!! this is ur actual bday present, not that Gross thing i sent earlier lol. again, do whatever u want with it!! u dont have to post it or anything. it’s just easier to submit stuff like this than to, idk, send u an email like a señora lol.
ok so im doing this in bullet point format bc the last time I wrote a coherent, well-written paragraph was like 5 years ago or smth. anyway!! since u hated soooo much my beautiful, amazing, unique goths au im going with the loser couple au… which was also a college au of sorts?? dskjhksjdf this isn’t even an au, since y’all are already losers tbh (^: this also got out of hand…. this shit is eight pages long. idk enjoy bithc.
first of all, ck the kind of dude everyone’s lowkey scared of bc he’s silent and serious af. also he does seem kind of a weirdo, tbh?
youve seen him around, maybe you’re in the same dorms but u have absolutely no idea what he’s majoring in :o and u ask around but no one has any idea either!! oh wow a mystery~~
BUT he’s kinda cute hmmm (^: and u probably find the weirdo vibe interesting
however it’s so hard to get to talk to him. u always run into him when you’re out with friends or in a hurry to get to class so :///
but destiny works in mysterious ways~~~ and once u meet it’s rly. so unexpected.
actually, it’s awful since u get locked out of ur dorm sound familiar?? during winter break, rly late at night after a long study session at the library yes, the library, fight me. so u kinda just. sit down miserably outside ur room, since ur roommates are gone, cursing everything and everyone. u will eventually go looking for someone to help u out or smth but right now u need to Whine.
but oh my!! enter mister im changkyun!!! that weirdo who actually lives a couple of doors away from u (how come you never found out wtf???)
he sees u basking in ur misery and actually. finds u rly cute??? bc you’re pouting, cursing a little under ur breath, fumbling with ur phone. but u also look angry as fuck, ready to kill a man??? and yet you’re really fucking cute what the hell!!!!
so he comes up to u and asks u what’s wrong, to which u answer not so nicely without even looking up from ur phone, bc you’re rly so done with this situation ://
but then u look up and u See who it is fuck fuck fuck fuckfucbicvufkhkcfj
but since ck’s Nice and he understands that u must be having an awful time (and also bc he thinks youre cute) he offers to help u. you’re kind of skeptical since he’s just another student, what could he do???
until he tells u he knows how to pick locks lmaoaoaoaoa. that lil weirdo (‘:
anyway he saves ur night. but since he’s an annoying lil shit he’ll tease u abt it every time he runs into u for the rest of winter break.
since that day y'all basiclly become an old, bickering, married couple fnsdjdj
u never stop annoying each other…. you’re wearing a hoodie? he’ll probably pull the hood all the way down until it covers ur eyes, and u get him back by messing up his hair which, by the way,is so soft….. hmmmm
u call each other nerd and loser and dumbass all the time lmao. he’ll constantly bring up the way u met just to jokingly say that you’d be lost without him :/// he rly is a lil shit.
it’s funny bc everyone figures out u are falling for each other… except u two. and i rly do mean everyone. ur friends. his friends. ur roommates. ur cat. the janitor, too, probably. it’s so obvious it hurts.
one time someone implies u would be a cute couple and y'all literally go all ‘no???? haha me??? liking that loser??? pfft not in a million years’
it’s the biggest lie, of course (: and ever since that person suggested u would look good together, both of u kind of realize it’d be… nice. more than nice. actually, super nice.
but since both of u are dumb tsunderes,  as ive said before, u will literally be the embodiment of this scene… except it goes both ways. honestly u are so gone for each other it’s GROSS.
but we need some angst up in here so y'all dont get together for a reaaaaaaally long time :/ smh. the pining is Real. ppl come and go in ur lives, and each person u go out with sees that u already fell for someone else—and that’s why all potential relationships don’t last much–, but sdjkfhksjdhk!!! neither of u want to openly admit it.
it’s A Mess bc u are actually good friends and u tell each other abt ur dates and stuff—secretly hoping the other will do something—but y'all looove being dumb so u act like it’s all cool and be like ‘o rly!! good for u, i hope it works out’. right. :/
y’all keep dancing around each other for several months until one Merciful Soul gets tired of ur shit and forces u to sort things out. im talking abt locking u up in some room and not letting u out until u stop pretending u aren’t disgustingly in love with each other. or smthequally cheesy (: u know ilove cheese
((obviously everyone eavesdrops through the door bc cmon, theyve been waiting for this for sooooo long))
at first u two are just annoyed at the Merciful Soul betchait was minhyuk, and u spend ur time yelling and cursing them for doing this (all while claiming that this is pointless, since u have NO feelings for each other. none. nada!)
after a very long time, it’s ck the one that confesses first lmao. youve been whining and being grumpy the whole time youve been locked up together and it kinda reminded him of the way u met… damn. here come The Feelings.
he’s tired, and there’s nothing left to lose. so he tells u The Truth.
[suspenseful pause….. what’s going to happen next?? :OOOOO]……… tune in next year to find out, in the continuation of Cristina’s Cheesy Birthday Present!!!
jk, proceed to the next bullet point pls.
obviously u tell him u feel the same way [insert ppl crying in the background] and he’s actually shocked when u say u like him back…. and gosh, he does look cute when he’s surprised…
so yeah!!! it’s until then that u FINALLY go on a date during the weekend!!. hallelujah. thanks minhyuk,u beautiful soul.
so!!! ok!! first date!!! a rly cute fairground in the evening!!!
u try to be fake mean to each other like u used to but everything feels different~~~ (^:
so instead y’all act bashful as hell, and blush at everything jjdfghjfhd. hands brushing accidentally?? BLUSH. eyes meeting? BLUSH. BLUSH BLUSH BLUSH!!! u also laugh at everything bc both of u are so nervous oh gmhg fdknjjkdsfjoidf this is gross.
he’ll tell bad jokes to make u laugh and they’re rly so so so bad that he actually keeps u in stitches. if u look rly closely you’ll see his huge ass heart eyes bc !!!! he made u laugh!!!! and u look so pretty when u laugh omg!!!! dis-gos-tinnnnn
it’d be such a cute date tbh im crying just thinking abt it (‘’’’: obviously he’s a gentleman and he lets u choose what to eat, which ride to go to first, etc. u could literally tell him ‘hey let’s just sit down and do nothing’ and he’d say yes. he’s so gONe, ifmgfjdmf.
he’s kinda quiet and a lot shier than u wouldve expected but youre literally melting bc that’s a new side to him that you’d never thought you’d see.
u end up having so much fun (‘: u gross lil idiots, u.
oh and he’s def the type to ask if he can kiss u at the end of the night EYYYYYY
even if u find that incredibly endearing you’ll probably roll ur eyes with a huge ass smile on urlips lmaoaoaoao and call him a dummy for even asking when you’ve literally be in cloud nine since ur date started kjkhwjeqdkwjlk  
[hello, brief break to clarify that from this point i forgot this was actually a college au lmao, so the rest of the bullet points are literally just. random facts abt u two dating hhhhhh. We dont even know what ck’s major is odjfngnfdj]  
at first things are a lil awkward in ur relationship tbh
catch ck googling ‘how to relationship’ on a daily basis dnfndkfjdncn he is sort of clueless abt how to handle The Feelings. mostly bc this is Important and the last thing he wants is to mess it up )^:
that goes away eventually, tho!! he’ll start being his weird little self real fucking soon, so Get Ready
u still call each other nerd and all that stuff, but ur voices are dripping with fondness when u say it… literally everyone around u gets cavities from it, ew.
he’s not that big on planning dates but from time to time he’ll take u to rly cool, unexpected, interesting places :o  and eventually he’ll show u his favorite secret spots ((’:
study dates are a thing. i bet he’s that type of person that enjoys reading in weird ass positions… his legs are like, halfway off the couch and his arm is bent in a way that looks almost painful… what the hell….?? but it’s fine (: it goes so well with ur study methods, those that are Too Weird for the library, yeah?? (:
he will also stare at u a lot bc u look cute when you’re rly focused on smth that is, when u stop  whining abtstudying…
every time u catch him doing that you’ll go all ‘stop staring at me!!! wtf are u looking at u weirdo’ and he’ll answer ‘you’re so pretty~~~ ♥️♥️♥️’. you’ll blush like a lil idiot, naturally (^: hmmmm
and yea, yea. nap dates are a thing too :/// with sleepy forehead kisses and raspy voices and tangled limbs. all that sappy stuff. he’s a lil shit tho, so he’ll sometimes poke ur ribs to tickle u lmao.
buuuut he’ll also take a lot of pics of u sleeping bc he thinks youre cute )))): his faves always end up being his wallpaper for months.
he’ll get strange gifts for u, like rly bizarre plushies and rare books on topics he thinks u will like,  tacky anime memorabilia, etc. he’ll always give them to u at random times bc he just saw them and reminded him of u ♥️  
he makes a lot of playlists for u too!!! pls listen closely, he puts a lot more thought into them than he lets on.
u like his selfies??? well he’ll send u a lot of those. unfortunately, bc he’s a lil shit, he’ll mostly send double chins and weird ass faces from equally weird angles  
from time to time he’ll send u a Nice One tho ((((^: and u know, tongue selfies since youreSO fond of his(and I quote) “5ft tongue”. and oh gosh! is that a tongue piercing…??? eyyyyyy
if u want to take couple selfies then you’re gonna have a real hard time bc he’ll always be making weird faces and poses just to be annoying. eventually u will make dumb faces too tho (’: what a couple of losers
expect weird random texts: he loves telling u abt whatever is on his mind—probably aliens. he thinks a lot abt aliens and the universe. throw some conspiracy theories in there, too—. he’ll also send obscure memes. and a lot of russian cats!!
he’ll love ur cosplay hobbie. he thinks it’s super cool. he’ll call u a nerd but don’t be fooled! he totally brags abt it with his friends (^:
oh! and this is unrelated but at some point y'all will look like an emo goth couple. u won’t even realize that you’re both wearing black and looking Edgy, it’ll just happen spontaneously. tragic 😔
there are a lot of comfortable silences when u hang out, but late night deep convos are also fundamental :o!!! bc y'all are Smort.
he’ll act like f*cboi from time to time tbh?? he’ll tell lots of dirty jokes LMAO. u roll ur eyes at him a lot bc they’re rly. so bad.
if he winks or does Eyebrow Things then u can’t rly roll ur eyes and act like you’re annoyed bc (: u like it (: and u think it suits him (: and he knows it (: (: (:
u get back at him by telling him he’s cute tho, and he’ll get all shy and he’ll stutter and saying “noooooo” while also fighting back a smile
he will also howl or bark at u to annoy u jdfhkjdf. damn f*rry ://
on that note, he loves to embarrass u in front of ur friends bc he’s a lil shit :DD
But he’s also the sweetest??? whenever he sees you’re feeling down he’ll start doing weird shit to make u laugh. if that doesn’t work then he’ll hug u real tight without saying anything else, bc that’s Enough, u know?? (’:
ok time to get Domestic lads!!!
Idk who the hell is going to cook bc y'all are a damn mess in the kitchen. u two try to cook Nice Meals sometimes. seven times out of ten u end up ordering takeout lmao.
be prepared: he sings in the shower, and he does so terribly. (he might do it a little louder and a little more off-key sometimes bc he knows it makes u laugh)
random kisses are a thing!!! he kisses ur cheek or ur shoulder or ur nape or literally. any body part he can get his lips on when u two are just hanging out, watching movies or smth. it’s so soft and cute )^: wtf im crying
but also stolen kisses!! he’ll kiss u at the most unexpected of times and it alwaysleaves u breathless
he’ll constantly put his head on ur shoulder and make this face at u (^:  
can’t sleep??? don’t worry!!! he’ll sing to u with that pretty, soothing voice of his
anyway. what I meant is that y’all would be such cute little idiots together this was long af. wow. im so sorry. happy birthday??? lmao
I HAD TO PUT THIS UNDER A READ MORE BC ITS SO FUCKING LONG NAT U DUMBASS ICB U DID THIS KFJSKFJSLKDJFLKJ THIS IS SO CHEESY AND GROSS and it also made me realize that u know too much shit abt me. what was that t*ngue part. im not talking to u ever again. aNYWAY U RLY ARE AN IDIOT I WAS SMILING SO BIG THRU THIS WHOLE THING MAYBE I SCREAMED A LITTLE?????????? FUCK U!!!!!!!! WHATS WITH ‘The Feelings’ PART I HATE THAT I ALMOST DIED FUCK OFF IM NOT LIKE THIS!!!!!!! I DONT HAVE FEELINGS!!!!!! U CANT DO THIS TO ME SKJFHSKJDHFKSLDJFH 
icb u rly did the fairground first date i rly fucking hate u why did i even tell u these things i knew it was gonna fire back im fjjgjkknknnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn ur ‘tragic 😔’ when we become a goth couple :/ u dont understand goth love
why the fuck did u make him howl. i wanna fucking die rn. what the fuck. he fucking would. fuck off.
i dont wanna talk abt all that domestic shit how did u even write all of that without dying i literally wanna rip all my limbs off i wont make any comment. i didnt need to know what that would be like but u looooove ruining my life so :)
i rly hate u ksdjfhskdjhfksjh icb u did this thank u i wanna die??????????? wtf nat !!!!! no but rly thank u :( u took the time to write this long ass college au (is it????? whats cks major tho rly :/ ) and just skdfjsjk u remembered all the weird shit i told u thats cute and also Really Bad what else do u know that i forgot i told u skdfksjh im literally always screaming at u abt this shit how did u !!! remember all of this!!!!! dldskfjshljhlakjsh this is so cute and horrible nat wtf how could u :( now im gonna cry :(
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Hi sorry if I'm bothering you but I love your legacy so much and I was wondering, how do you get attached to you sims so you continue to play them? I've made lots of sims and tried stories and stuff but I never seem to begin to love them. Thanks in advance :)
hiiii!!! not a bother at all! it took be a really long time to truly fall in love with a family for my legacy, i stopped and started so much and even got to the point where i fell out of love with my original simblr fam (rip the montgomerys 3)
HOWEVER!! i’ve found the key for me personally is to not force myself to play with them! you want to take a break from simblr? DO IT! ive done it so many times and who cares! i know the people who love my legacy will continue to read it if theres 3 hours between posts or 3 months! (is now a bad time to mention my queue runs out in 3 days? anyway)
another massive thing for me personally is that i love story driven legacies! i have a google doc where i plan everything and i find that seeing my goals for my own legacy rly motivates me and reminds me why i love them and why i want to continue sharing them with u all!! 
now thats out of the way, to sims themselves - don’t be afraid to scrap a fam and start anew! im absolutely in love with my lil aspyn clarke, more than ive ever loved a sim but dw it took me a few tries. but here’s some things i found useful: — build them a personality outside of the traits - aspyn might be squeamish, perfectionist and romantic but shes also driven and proud of her work as well as a lil insecure and nervous around people she likes and also can be overly proud and kinda full of herself.. these arent traits obviously but theyre things i think about her and helps me shape her as more than just a sim. dont make them perfect people with perfect traits, theyre not people let alone perfect but u get my gist. — also for me, i share dumb quirky things with haley and jills that you cant replicate in the sims but thats how i see my own sim and thats why i love her - jills sent me this random photo of a girl with pride flags and loser written in the bg and said it was aspyn and it was true! getting your pals involved in your sims helps a lot and if you dont wanna to share with your friends, you can share with me (im ur friend but besides the point here anon)— also pinterest boards!! i love pinterest boards omg. i have some for aspyn and lucy (as well as some future charas we havent met yet) but they also help me visualise how i see my characters and inspire me.
this is very long and very ramble-y i hope it helps u a lot its 3am im sorry im a lil frazzled i just really wanted to answer this for you ♡♡
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hi ash! sorry that im a little late, ive been a bit preoccupied these few days, but im glad you like talking to me :D i rly like talking to you too <3 i appreciate that you put so much effort into answering everything T-T i do have discord actually! id love to continue talking over there after this :D also this is crazy long so dont rush yourself sjhdjdjd
if you want any nct music recs in the future you can come to me 😌 i really love hello future!! i say this about every title track during every comeback but its really my favourite one right now! 
YOU PLAYED DRUMS?? thats so cool :O ive always found drummers rly attractive sjshjehdjsh 
the have i evers :
i have never! been to a concert, ive just never had the chance :/
i have! sneaked out, but it was with the help of my mum where my dad didn't know lmao ehejenjdhen
i have! gone through both a one direction and bts phase. 1D came first and it lasted for almost half a year i believe? and i discovered bts in 2018 thanks to my friend, but i started exploring and eventually drifted apart from them in early 2020. jungkook still has a special place in my heart tho :)) 
i have! had a irl crush actually :'D he actually knew i liked him but did nothing at all and we remained pretty good friends, but he stopped talking to me about over a year ago, and i lowkey don't wanna admit it but i miss him sometimes :') 
i have! pets. i have 3 dogs and a cat currently, and i have 6 other unofficial dogs and a idk how many fish which are at my grandma's side :DD
i have! performed in front of a crowd, i was in a storytelling competition when i was 9 and 10, and then i learned to play the erhu when i was 12 and performed a few times :)) 
i have! fic wise, i also love by-moonflowers fics sm! T^T i read her tokyo ghoul au and i actually didn't have a clue what tokyo ghoul was, i looked it up on wikipedia before reading it djbfkdhdjd and her exes confront each other series was really amazing too. and im rambling but her jeonghan magic au, all the stars we steal, that was probably the first fic of her's i read and it hit something in me and i really wish i could read it again like it was the first time 😔 i really loved it sm. book wise, i will never forget jodi picoult's small great things. and also like any book reader, ps. i love you is definitely a favourite of mine :') it was so touching and i just genuinely really love that story. 
i have! there's quite a lot of moments like that, but this one where i went on vacation in the mountains? we stayed at a very nice place. on the first day i was really tired so i slept til the evening, and when i woke up it was drizzling and there's was quite a breeze, so i sat in front of the open door of my room. in front was a swimming pool so i just put on some music and watched the rain drop into the pool. it was the most relaxed i had felt in a while and i wish i could go back :') 
i would say i have! when we can talk anon off i'll tell you which one, but i really enjoyed writing this one drabble/oneshot and im glad other people seemed to like it as well :DD
and ofc i have! i met seventeen when i was pretty down, and i treasure them the most now. they helped me through a lot and really changed me and im really grateful to them
i wanna know your answers to these too! so, have you ever
been to a place/been in a particular mood after a specific event that you wanted to stay in forever?
written a piece of work that sparked energy within your fingertips?
met a person/have someone in your life who you now just treasure so deeply?
the next mission is out dkhdkdhfj but i'll continue for now, would you rather (pls dont hate me after this)
only listen to seventeen or txt forever
spend a week with soobin or chan
only eat bingsu or only watch 1 studio ghibli films for the rest of your life
sign with sm or yg or jyp
know how to play every single instrument or speak language in the world
be a master at something you love (singing, dancing, writing, that kinda thing) or something unique (like having a photographic memory or like ice carving? or even mouth reading)
i also suddenly remembered, but knitting is also one of my many hobbies :D
- 💎 anon loves you and wishes you a good day!
you can reply whenever you are ready anon. it excites me that we've been having a steady back and forth but sometimes life happens and you should definitely prioritize any other responsibilities you have!! i'll always be here 😌 knitting is a fun hobby anon!! i used to do that and crochet a lot too ,,, i should get back to it. what do you make?
before i go ahead and answer these can i just say how much i love that you personalized it?? that really means a lot to me <3 anyways~ here we go!! when we get to turn off anon i would love to hear some nct recs!! most of my irl kpop friends ult them and i'd love to get to know more!! and discord would probably be the best way to share because the asks just get longer and longer LOL (i love them)
drums yes!! i've been told that i look like i'd play the piano instead bahaha but i think drums are pretty neat :3 i also saw this person ask huening kai about band txt and he said soobin would play the drums :O need i say more?
thank you for your answers!! we definitely gotta talk more about them once we can chat on discord!! i loved reading them and they were just so lovely <333 for the last 3:
i don't think so? i have yet to be in a moment where i am completely lost in the energy - but the closest i've been to that level of peace would be the late nights where i'm playing my favourite music and about to drift off to sleep. i feel almost content, and sometimes wish i could stay in my dreams forever :3
my very first fic!! flights and feelings - i was writing it on a whim at 2 am? and i wasn't planning on posting it until i did randomly and now i am a tumblr writer :O
seventeen like you said! i don't think i would have made it through the rest of high school without them, and as of now they've been one of the things keeping me going :)
the next mission is out owo playlist making do i see? anyways onto these first!! how dare you write these anon my head is SPINNING
only listen to seventeen or txt forever ...seventeen, they're my ults!! but also because they have more music released atm, we have yet to see the amazing things txt have planned!! i wouldn't be surprised if i start ulting txt in the future as well :3 i...bought 3 of their albums a few days ago
spend a week with soobin or chan // WHAT KIND OF QUESTION IS THIS ARE YOU TRYING TO GIVE ME A HEADACHE (moots please look away) soobin <3 i love them both very much but i think soobin and i will vibe more maybe it's my delusions THEY'RE BOTH MY ULTS and i'm scared of talking to both D: but soobin is slightly younger than chan so that's why i think he'd be easier to talk to T_T the thought of spending a week with soobin makes my head spin
only eat bingsu or only watch 1 studio ghibli films for the rest of your life // bingsu!! i would not mind that one bit :3
sign with sm or yg or jyp // as someone who is a terrible singer and dancer, i would not survive in either of these companies. however, under the assumption that i can do these things, i would say... jyp. i don't think there's an entertainment company that treats their idols completely right but out of these 3 i feel like i'd cry less in jyp. is kq entertainment an option? idk all the details but they seem to treat ateez okay, or maybe IU's company...again i don't know all the deets
know how to play every single instrument or speak language in the world // speak every language in the world!! it upsets me everyday that i'm not close to my culture because of this :(
be a master at something you love (singing, dancing, writing, that kinda thing) or something unique (like having a photographic memory or like ice carving? or even mouth reading) // i'd say maybe something unique!! it's kind of thrilling to always be looking for ways to improve on something you love <3 so i'd go with something unique...a photographic memory would be very helpful for studying!! but maybe i'd like to have a talent in making people smile!!
thank you for these questions anon!! i'm heading out to work now but i'd love to write you some more would you rathers later on :) i should have packed more questions into this reply but i really gotta go now sorry :( so instead just tell me how are you!! also i would like to know your answers to these ones!! you are very creative with these btw :3
which of your biases would you want to spend a week with?
what food would you be okay with eating for the rest of your life?
would you rather:
sign with sm, yg or jyp?
know how to play every single instrument or speak language in the world?
be a master at something you love or something unique?
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shytiff · 3 years
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May Small Wins
1 - lazed, went to racheel’s place and put my motorbike there, went to slipi jaya with silvi devi reza to watch seobok (it was fun!!), had iftar at the yumz green sedayu. It was raining when we get back. prayed maghrib and isya in some random mosque. went back and arrived at like 8 past sumn. showered, slept like a babyy
2 - lazed, slept and woke up at like 11, went to nila’s house, practiced doing eyeliner by borrowing nila's (focallure brand), iftar at green sedayu foodcourt (originally intended to go to the yumz but it enforces actual distancing) with angkot ppl minus tik will. Arrived home at about 9-ish.
3 - magang as usual. Went to rm. Took mrt to lebak bulus. My inaco salary finally came. My head kinda hurts after tarawih. Ended up skimming over bj alex lmaooo. Did not shower today lol,,,,
4 - added dr dafsah's revision to the excel database otw to rsf. Pak nardi took a while to arrive. Left rsf early to go to the bank. I (((finally))) activated m-banking lmaooo wow the features are neat wow im not jahiliah anymore. Found this method of just let it sweat anyway during tarawih lmaoo. Preferably with long sleeves bcs somehow you feel less of the sweaty feel compared to tshirt.
5 - sampling - data entry - RM as usual. Theres no new RM. Read a goood dramione fic by bex chan even if its not complete, its okay. Im okay :"))). Iftar was soup, salad, chicken katsu and french fries. Its been 2 days that i practiced sleeping-to-rain-sound. The first night was spent as a dreamless quick sleep (its over before you knew it), but tonight i dreamed abt almira's wedding lmaoo.
6 - no sampling today!! Still went to rsf tooo go to the mall w regen lmao. Did some data entry. Went to PP by mrt. Went back by going to halte gbk and thankfully the kalideres one arrived after only waiting for 5 mins. Its surprisingly quick, compared to lebak bulus - pesakih trip. Took abt 20 mins to jelambar.
7 - no sampling today too. Dr vera gave us lebaran cookies! Did gcp for bu suryati a5. Went to rm, finally finished the available rm. Went home early. Can finally relax since its the weekend.
8 - literally laid in bed til my body hurts. Rly want to read sumn but dunno what. Finally decided to read momoiro heaven. And rere hello. And after iftar i read lack of love. And just like tht, my saturday was gone. Cant bring myself to do things
9 - its another day of lazying (or self sabotaging, cant tell). Read spy family and its effin hilarious. Wasted my sunday. Cant bring myself to even move and i just laid in bed all day.
10 - last day of work in the weeekend lmao. Felt better than being in AR, but still not that much productivity. Went to RM. Phone call w fianti along the way to plan food in almira's bridal shower. Went back at 12-ish. Picked up my dress from risma busana. Walked to and fro halte kebon jeruk. Prayed zuhur close to ashar in kfc's mushola. Felt better after ~8k steps. Had homelab's green tea mixed with vsoy. It honestly made me feel better. Matcha, or caffeine, sure is amazing. At least i had a sense of normalcy before losing all the will to self-care
11 - consumed internet entertainment u til i was sick and tired of it. Watched a lot of cut videos. Granny came and stayed over. So i slept upstairs
12 - same as 11 but upstairs. More relatives came near iftar time so i excused myself to shower. Slept in mom n dads room at like 12-ish. Watched hp goblet of fire since keisha and karins newest obsession was draco. We squealed together over liking enemies to lovers trope haha,,,,
13 - Somehow all of dad's jakarta relatives came for lebaran. the last time i checked, there were some bridges being burned. prayed eid at home. watched perempuan tanah jahanam (which was surprisingly not scary). ate. napped. talked about personal things w keisha and karin. i cant believe the time has finally come where we talk about this kinda stuff. watched you’re next (it barely has any plot, just gore). they went back at about 8 pm and i just sleptttt yall lmao i didnt shower today. disgusting, i know
14 - cam barely get out of bed. Managed to shower at zuhur time. Watched dalbang and laughed like crazy bcs its just that funny. Read fanfics. Tiktok. Ate once and had greenfield yogurt at the evening. Fell asleep. Woke up at 1 and snacked on 1 pack of oat krunch
15 - run bts. Originally planned to go to flavola but it was still closed, so i went to dm's dunkin. Ordered orange juice and oeanut choco donut but somehow the price wasnt package price hhh. Turns out my clires account was somehow banned. So i contacted the admin. Instead of doing dr dafsah's excel i ended up taking off the makara sticker from my laptop. Bought some stuff for almira's bridal shower. Bought arirang at hari2 (its funny bcs yesterday i was seeing online marketplace, planning to buy it, but turns out hari2 the magical place had buy 2 get +1 deal for arirang.
16 - run bts. Managed to move my body a bit. Did 20 squats (ill elaborate on this later). That improved my mood. Tidied up some of my stuff. Saw the paper bag of random memorabilias by friends.
17 - went to rsf by tj. left kalideres 06:45 and arrived at RSF 8:15. sampling. went to RM (still no new ones). picked up by mom. went to salemba for almira’s bridal shower. originally planned to get padang at citra minang behind BK but it was closed. so we drove around looking for open ones. ended up buying it in a small (but crowded) padang place near a big padang restaurant lmao. was the first one to arrive at acacia. checked in, pulled the bed near the wall. showered. its hilarious sometimes with a bit more serious discussion anjayy. went home w febby who drove and clara
18 - went to mcd to get lunch (since everyone’s fasting) and tried to muster the will to do something. i didnt manage to do anything except shopping online (brought dusty pink hijab at hijup). got spicy chicken and iced coffee. (spoiler alert: tomorrow i got mencret2 lmaooo). read my suha and beyond the skidipapap its actually rly good
19 - went to RSF (with mom as usual. quickly snapped RM pictures while mom was waiting. went with her to mami’s house bcs she and uwak will fly to banjar. finally got to meet haekal, he’s such a smiley babyy its basically free therapy. planned outing with nisa lmao. from soekarno hatta we went to vintage vibes lmao since we’re already out. vintage vibes is more crowded now. and there’s less good findings now. went back emptyhanded. ate chicken arirang since there’s no food. fell asleep at like 06:30 until early morning lmaooo
20 - woke up at 2-ish am, played my phone, fell asleep at like 9?, woke up again at 11 lmaooo. went to sbux. had matcha latte. did some inaco work. todays the most productive ive been this week.
21 - went to gi with febby to also meet up with fi, bought falsies and glue (later proved to be of a horrible quality), siraman and pengajian almira (first time seeing an actual siraman), went to blok m w nes ren ara gen. Tried naruto takoyaki at little tokyo, went to daitokyo (i didnt eat anything), and got matcha cake, sakura and mango raspberry gelato at kebun ide. Picked up by mom. Renata gifted me bts 2021 winter package photocard 🥺🥺
22 - iluni internship webinar by dr naldo. Grabbed fried chicken master. Stupid time management etcetc made my start makeup at 12 (febby went out at 13:30). My falsies and hijabdo was done by herrr thank god for the help. Went to swissbel. Didnt take a pic w almira bcs time. Almiras wedding at damai indah golf pik. My skin was TERRIBLE at the wedding. The make up didnt stick prolly bcs of vitacid. Thank god for masks,,, went back home w febbyy. Made tiktok lmao
23 - lazed. Went to flavola. Its finally daytime caffeine again w kopsuscok. Did dr triya's translation work and finished it at home. She transferred the fee at like 11pm
24 - off to RSF with mom. no new medical records. wrote fuad’s name on the medrec borrowing form. continued to nisa’s place w mom. lazed, played w haekal, put some patient’s phone number on the inaco excel. Off to GBK with nisa and sarah. parked at abc field (shouldve parked near GBK’s H gate). saw moja museum 2.0, took lots of pics. mo paint (moral lesson: draw the background first!! not the foreground). finished at 16:30. ashar at masjid al-bina. nisa dropped me off at gbk tj station. prayed maghrib on the bus since the traffic was so ughh. met atikah in lippo puri. decided to eat seirockya so we walked to puri. talked about a certain someone along the way. we rly talked about it while walking until we arrived at seirockya. atikah treated me uyeyy since she and racheel will stay in depok for 2 weeks starting tomorrow. got the shoyu ramen and gyoza. took the taxi to atikah’s place. mom’s waiting there lmaoo i was like “noo dont wait at jco, just wait at atikah’s”. still felt energized that night in my bed. no sleepy2. like 100% awake. 
25 - woke up at like 9:30. i basically did nothing today. didnt even shower lmao (i showered last night). read the good teacher in one go. zoom meeting w dr eva. i rly need some structure in life, goshhh
26 - showered and went to mcd. got nasi uduk, breakfast wrap and milo for 26k (thanks mcd app promo and mcd duta garden’s menu machine, i dont have to interact with another human). planning to do dr dafsah’s excel after all the data is complete, and still no new inaco data, so i ended up.... online shopping at bobobobo....... (bought outer and white culotte). tidied up the writings on my stickies (plenty of words has accumulated). ordered onejai for emir juan (expensive!!! 79k no promo lolll but free delivery. i was baited by gojek’s 1k 2 week subscription and felt like hmmm i should get something since we live in the middle of nowhere and free deliveries felt significant at that particular time when im holding my phone lmao). fell asleep after drinking vsoy + matcha lol its soft caffeine no longer works i guess
27 - woke up late as usual, went to sbux at 1 pm. tried white peach matcha frapp. the peach overpowers and u can barely taste the matcha. tried to read something useful (in medicine) but skimmed 2 ppt and then i saw solid’s bitly for isip. finished reading banana fish. couldnt bawl my eyes out because im outside.
28 - checked out rsf. Still no new ones. Immediately went back. Lazed and wasted my time
29 - iluni webinar. Here comes the impending life crisis. Ate nasi uduk and mie goreng telor today. Tried vsoy golden grain with matcha. It has almond aftertaste. Line call with kris for almost 4 hrs until 11 past sumn pm.
30 - more iluni webinar. Dr Eric, SpPD, PhD was rly cool. Tried daily box (butter soy chicken). Quite tasty. Mkg w regen. Videocalled in the mall w silvi racil bcs its ale and nadaa's wedding today. Bought gooma 500ml matcha w gofood pickup discount. Ate sushi go (the shoyu has mirin btw). 50k+ you get 6 piece of sushi (2 salmon) and matcha cake and ocha. Quite a nice deal. Talked abt cryptocurrency lmao. Went back and forth w TJ. All hail tj
31 - planned to do at least some productive stuff at home. turns out nila is outside and had some time to spare. so we went out. i met her in citra 6. we went to pik’s white beach. its scorching hot since its 2 pm. spent like 15 mins there. we had wanted to stop by monsieur spoon but THERES A QUEUEEE even if its a hot afternoon. so we ate tom sushi at green sedayu. talked a bit afterwards in nila’s place and then i was picked up by emir. tried gooma’s matcha. its not sweet like sbux. approved by mom (who doesnt like sweets). but its more expensive than sbux’s 2L 100k promo lol. (45k after gopay pickup promo for 500 ml). reread bj alex lmaooooo found new tidbits
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upward-movement · 6 years
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tell me abt ur ocs
damn… idk who this is and also i hate my ocs with a burning passion but im not gonna turn down this oppurtunity
i have four, and two separate universes
the kind of heavier concept is the one with lazuli and jupiter. dumbass names i agree w/e. its honestly been at the back of my mind for at least a year now but im still super fuzzy on the details hdbfkdbnk. basically, lazuli and jupiter are two astronauts in a futuristic setting that go on a space expedition - eris 1 - thats kinda doomed from the start and everyone knows it. the aim is to study a black hole. so my two bitches here dont rly wanna be alive anyway so theyre kinda like ‘fuck it, heres to science’ and they go through all the billions of qualifications required to go through w/ whats basically a suicide mission. jupiters parents are dead. she seems rly sweet and calm and shit on the outside but shes super depressed abt it despite however many years have passed. she kind of is taking a more optimistic outlook on her role in the mission - like this isnt suicide, she could and maybe should continue living on earth but… its better she does it than anyone else, she doesnt have much to live for anyway and shed never want to take an opportunity at life from someone else. lazuli probably had abusive parents, and maybe a little sister that she tried to take care of? w/e, shes a mountain of angst. rly obviously depressed lol. so lazuli and jupiter (jupe) are the two that are assigned to the mission, and they book it off the planet for a decades long expedition that they have no control in. everything about the flight is planned out from the beginning, its not so futuristic that theyre piloting some cool craft and meeting aliens and bs no its Lame. anyway, guess what, they fall in love. doomed space lesbian shenanigans ensue. they probably, somewhere along the line, start wanting to live again and wish they never left earth. but strangely theyre kind of ok with it now. uhm heres where it gets fuzzy: either they survive the expedition and make it back to earth and live happily ever after with renewed will to live and a wife, or they die out there. thats the thing about them just being kind of a concept in the back of my head, this story never needs to have a conclusion or a set storyline - it just is.
the other one is a lot more lighthearted and dumb haha. it follows gwendolyn, whos the stereotypical obnoxious teen princess to some old-ass medieval civilization, and ?, whos literally just an eldritch abomination in tiny teen girl form. ? runs a little store fortune-reading or whatever place. crystals and herbs and all that jazz. but see the thing is she never actually does anything people just walk in and she kinda stares at them until they leave with a sinking feeling that the entire life theyve lived and will live is all for naught. ?s just here to have a good time tbh. i should stress again that shes literally an eldritch abomination and she wears a fancy little mask to hide the fact that her mouth is a writhing mess of oily tentacles. so meanwhile gwen is this arrogant princess that sees this creepy girl on the outskirts of the city and is like…… hot. so they fall in love. and gwen is all like DAD, i L O V E H E R and at first hes kind of like ‘….? shes? a girl? and also more importantly im pretty sure shes not even human?’ but gwens like ‘i L O V E H E R WHY DO YOU SQUASH ALL MY DREAMS I HATE YOU’ and hes just like. whatever. so anyway theyre in love and they get married and surprisingly no one in this huge ancient kingdom really bats an eye at lesbians and eldritch abominations. and thats… kind of all there is to it. (ive been playing with the idea that gwen nicknames ? ‘amy’ but that probably isnt really a name of the time-period. w/e! its fun)
thanks for reading as you can see my ocs are legitimately the most one-dimensional assholes ever but yknow what are you gonna do.
5 notes · View notes
bipolyjack · 7 years
Note
Please tell me more about why you like sheith, I'm very curious to hear the rest of it.
(alright luckily i had the beginning of this saved elsewhere when tumblr just randomly sent it early so imma just begin by pasting. also spoilers for voltron s4 obv) 
the original ask was something like “curious why u like sheith? ive thought abt it and i think i prefer klance”
rubs hands 2gether Thank U for Asking
first of all, thats chill! if klance is ur thing, fuckin go for itmy dude, have a great time with that shit. the fandom’s huge andtheres tons of content. im all for ppl shippin what they want and imnot here to tell someone to ship or not ship something. if u do trulywant to know why im a sheith tho, buckle the fuck up cause im awashin sheith feelings at every moment and i got Things 2 say
alright so the main thing with sheith is that it feels realhealthy and good. (well it did. things are weird this season bc shiromay or may not be a clone but up until his disappearance at least.)they’re rly good abt checking in with each other to see how theother one’s doing and feeling, and they lean on each other a lotfor support. they also treat each other as equals and respect each other’s choices (again, with minor exceptions in the current season). they got that good good hidden backstory together. they got that good good star crossed lovers thing goin on where the universe keeps ripping them apart, fucking them over and tossing them back together more fucked up than before and my dude i Eat That Shit UP. also that good good height difference.the show gives them lots of moments where they’re either alone in a room together havin a private moment or havin an equally private moment in front of the whole fuckin team where fuckin everybody can see them (like the first Hug tm). they’re openly physically intimate with each other (which keith is not with anyone else) and they’re not like. ashamed of that. there’s so much canon content i cry daily. 
here lemme break it down
we know they knew each other in the garrison, and not just like in passing, like acquaintances, but enough that keith was the only person there to see shiro off when the kerberos mission launched. in s1ep1 lance says of shiro “omg that guys my hero” and of keith “you’re my rival” but neither shiro nor keith know who lance even fuckin is. bc presumably they didnt hang out. everyone in the garrison knows who keith and shiro are but they - keith especially it seems like - dont keep track of the other students. also theres this whole fanon thing where shiro and matt were best friends in the garrison and hung out all the time before kerberos, but in s4 when matt greets shiro hes incredibly stiff and awkward and calls him sir and shiro just goes “pidge never gave up on u buddy” which i guess could be a clone thing but could also be him bein like “i totally did give up on u tho, whatever” (and i can totally buy that considering how pidge’s whole personal arc this whole time has been looking for matt and their dad, and while shiro has been supportive of that, he’s also been like hey dude that’s not our top priority as a team). so from that i infer that matt and shiro werent best buds in the garrison, and that he must have spent a lot more of his time with keith bc in s2ep1 keith makes it clear that shiro made a significant impact on his life and that he still thinks about things shiro said to him before kerberos. which we havent seen. bc theyre hiding the pre-kerberos backstory from us and i cry. also their flashbacks in s1ep2 (i think, i dont exactly remember which ep but i think its that one) when they all put on the headsets and we see their fondest memories, shiro’s is the day they were separated and keith’s is the day they found each other again like jesus.
then there’s keith’s first scene in the show. the first thing we see him doing is kicking the shit out of like three garrison guys to rescue shiro. we get that close up of him touching shiro’s unconscious fuckin face and his first line in the whole show is him saying shiro’s name. like shit dude how am i supposed 2 not ship that. the first time keith and lance interact, its lance butting in on that moment and keith being like “who the fuck are u” and its. uncomfortable. we also know that keith has been livin alone in the desert and obsessing over these lion carvings bc he got kicked out of the garrison for basically insubordination sometime after shiro went missing. we get that scene in the shack where keith talks abt feeling lost until shiro showed up and everyone else in the room looking all confused and uncomfortable as these two dudes who clearly already know each other well and have been separated for like a year just stare into each other’s eyes or what the fuck ever. also the scene outside the shack where keith comes and finds shiro and puts a hand on his shoulder and asks him how hes doing - theyre alone for that part. also worth mentioning is that keith has no hesitation touching shiro’s galra tech arm, whereas lance hesitates before shaking his hand. we see a bunch of times that keith is touch averse with almost everyone except shiro, in a way that indicates a degree of prior familiarity and a good understanding of boundaries that keith hasnt had the time or inclination to set up with lance, hunk, pidge, allura, coran etc. also the one time he holds lance when sendack attacks the castle and lance is unconscious, lance sort of blows it off later and basically goes “no homo” when keith brings it up so that was a bummer
i also love some of the Pauses they put into shiro and keith’s dialogue, some of them are just. so choice. like when keith proposes a crazy plan that puts him in danger and shiro just takes a sec, closes his eyes, then goes “alright i’ll back u up, do what u gotta do” like!!!! boi!!!!!! thats good shit. also in s2ep9 during the blade of marmora trial when keith is basically having this nightmare about shiro rejecting him because of his connection to the galra, (which real actual shiro can see because this whole ep was a fuckin fanfiction) and he does that same thing where hes like “shiro... *pause, close eyes for Just a sec* you’re like a brother to me” which! by the way!! i have said the same thing!! to a friend i had a crush on!!! who was straight!!!! and i was a little baby who didnt know i was into girls yet and we used to say we were like sisters bc i? didnt know i?? was gay???? we shared her bed whenever i stayed over and she really did see me as a sister and i would just lie next to her and daydream about touching her boobs,, anyway keith is so relatable there i could yell forever but continuing on,
can we, real quick, talk abt the first time keith flies the black lion? bc in s2ep1 hes not the black paladin yet. real shiro is still around. and keith legit goes up to black, puts a hand on her big ole nose and goes “ur boi is in trouble, we gotta help him” and she goes “yeah dude hop in” like?????????????? thats some fanfic shit again! black Knows! also dont even talk to me abt how many times keith and shiro yell each others names in that ep its unreal. also the trope (that i eat the fuck up every time) of one member of the otp lying trapped and injured somewhere and talking to the other member of the otp thru a helmet comm or whatever and they cant see each other but they can hear each others voices, so they have to keep talking to like reassure each other they’re both still alive and okay?!!! im such a sucker for that shit!!!! ummmmm the fact that shiro keeps reassuring keith that hes fine when theres a gaping glowing wound in his side and hes like visibly in pain, clenching his teeth, eyes closed, groaning, sweat beading on his forehead, the whole fuckin thing?? and josh knocked it outta the park with shiro’s voice in that ep making him sound like he was trying not to sound hurt and exhausted so that keith wouldn’t worry too much like Fuck me up!! smiling thru the pain when keith talks abt how much shiro changed his life and made him a better person??? boi!!!!!
then there are the times when shiro talks abt something happening to him and keith taking over as voltron’s leader, and keith gets all panicked about it like he cant stand the thought of losing shiro again (this happens a bunch of times but the ones that are coming to mind are s2ep1 and s2ep9 bc. again. those are the fanfic episodes). and then he Does lose him again and he’s so clearly grieving, lashing out at the rest of the team, super obviously feeling shiro’s loss more than the others (and lance is a real dick about it a bunch of times which really rubbed me wrong), going out to look for him over and over bc he wants to believe so bad that shiro’s out there somewhere. omg the “please no” when the black lion accepts him that shit Fucked me right up!! he wants to honor shiro’s wishes!! but some part of him knows that’s like admitting that shiro’s gone and isn’t coming back. and then!!!!!! when they find kuron and its just the red lion and the galra ship floating alone in space just like. gently drifting toward each other. keith’s little tired smile there. fuck me up. and then we find out in the next scene that keith has been the only one in shiro (kuron)’s room while he’s recovering and shiro (kuron) hasnt bothered to shave or cut his hair or get dressed yet and he lets keith see him like that and not the rest of the team. fuck. keith looks Exhausted in that scene. hes got bags under his eyes, hes kinda hunched in on himself, arms crossed, like something in him Knows this isnt his boi but he wants to believe it’s him so bad and its. god. its a lot. and Then when hes turning to leave and kuron is like “how many times will u have to save me before this is over” and keith’s face just relaxes into this legitimately genuine smile when he says “as many times as it takes” like!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! fuck me
this is where it starts gettin awkward with them bc kuron isnt shiro and he doesnt treat keith the way shiro would but he Tries, like after keith fucks up that one mission and kuron comes and finds him (again, in private) to touch his shoulder and be like “im proud of u boi” when keith clearly Did Not Do A Good Job and keith just looks bummed like “thats. thats not tru” and it Hurts me bc we know real shiro doesnt do fake praise. also kuron orders keith to put himself in danger more than once and doesnt give a shit that keith and the others get hurt because of it which also real shiro would never do - we’ve seen him react when his teammates take hits before, but especially keith, like during the bom trial. then theres s4ep1 where keith sort of drifts away from team voltron in order to do more stuff with the blade of marmora and everyone’s pissed at him but then as hes walking out kuron’s like “you know we’re here for you if you need us” and keith gets that soft smile again like “i know and i cant tell you how much that means to me” and then they do that good good hand clasp that turns into a hug which by the way is a stark contrast to when other people hug keith and they just kinda grab him and he goes all stiff and it takes him a sec or three to put his arms around them if he even does that at all - with shiro they do the hand clasp first and then walk into the hug together and keith buries his face in shiro’s fuckin shoulder and smiles and closes his eyes and i wanna die. and theyve done this twice now which makes me think they probs did it before kerberos too and that also hurts me. 
then theres s4ep6 where keith has gone the whole season feeling like he was a bad leader. it seems like voltron doesnt rly need him and his friends dont need him and shiro doesnt need him and hes been hanging with the bom who have their whole philosophy of not going back to rescue their own guys if it means putting the mission or the rest of the team in danger (which keith already was saying when allura was captured - how very galra of him) and now keith’s having to readjust to that mindset after being part of such a close knit team. so when he sees a way to take that shield down, he just fuckin goes for it. hes started to see himself as expendable. when shiro thinks hes about to die, we get all kinds of flashbacks, the first of which is him and keith alone outside the shack. there are no flashbacks with keith. he just closes his eyes. and shiro (kuron) congratulates him. like obv its before he knows what keith was about to do, but still, thats some fucked up shit. 
now this wasnt rly part of ur question, ie u didnt ask me how i felt abt klance, but i feel like i gotta say: lance just grates on me. im sorry i know lots of people who love him but he just. isnt my cup of tea. and i do think the relationship shown in the show between keith and shiro is a lot more mature and healthy than the one shown between lance and keith. lance has some good moments! but canon lance and fanon lance seem like two entirely different people to me a lot of the time and thats all cool and fine if ur lookin for that, again im not here to stop ppl from having fun, but there are so many good sheith moments in the show and im just glad to see the relationship between two dudes depicted that way regardless of whether it becomes canon or not. also lance in the show is only shown being attracted to girls, and in kinda a skeevy way - like ive met guys who treat me like that and been Very off-put by that kind of behavior. and it would put me off if after all that they got him together with keith. like hes just superficially interested in all these hot girls but keith, who he has very few heartfelt intimate moments with onscreen, is his True Love? like thats,, not good bi rep. i Do rly like the bond hes been building with allura since they switched lions, that seems like its going in a direction that could turn out to be very wholesome and sweet. but again, if klance is ur thing, by all means have a ball.
k that was a lot but tl:dr i like 2 cry and sheith provides me with lots of opportunities to do that,, if u read it all then thank u deeply and truly for ur attention, u probs Understand me as a person a bit better than before lol
36 notes · View notes
yeobai · 4 years
Text
Planning WILD 4hr
Okay so I really like the idea of YJ asking why did you stop? And SY continues. The question is when SY gives in and YJ fucks her senselessly. After SY cums twice. How does on finish YJ off. I kept thinking just how exactly to fuck her lmao. So I can paint the whole picture
i like YJ flipping SY and fucks her senselessly and maybe she’s already close after making SY comes twice? and maybe she gets closer when SY starts begging her
people can also cum from the other end of strap - coz the friction and maybe YJ is the kind who gets off by giving others pleasure aksjakaj
Okay takes intensive notes haha
what do u mean exactly by SY ‘giving in’ btw?
She begs.
ogay so we're on the same page
yea I can see YJ just flipping her - so she's the top now and fucks her senselessly they can cum together
Coming together and cumming  together iconic(edited)
lmao the ideal that can happen - or SY can help her to cum after that
Alright so let the paint the whole picture. I know what happens in middle and the end but how did we get here. Aka I'm in charge you do all the work.
the one in charge is YJ right? power bottom
Mhm
(lmao im still trying to process YJ fully bottomingm, Im-)
Please collect yourself. It was a lot for me to imagine too. maybe there's somekind of power struggle in the beginninng
and SY shoves YJ to the bed
and just climbs her at firsr
when YJ wants to flip her, SY resists
__
Okay starting with a playful vibe...
So picture it, their bed, it's night. SY shoves YJ to the bed. They start kissing and as it escalates flips them and the SY pouts.
Bruh please tell me why my brain wants her to dead ass say, I want to be on top. Haha brain is doing the most
or maybe whe YJ wants to flip them, SY shoves her again to the bed, "Stay there."  Cause right now nothing would be fucking hotter than her "lightly" grasping her neck and pulling her in for a kiss but I digress sjsgshdkdj
when SY finally gives inn before YJ flips them
Now so SY climbs on top? Or is she already on top when she tells yj to stay put.
she's already on top I guess?
so she shoves YJ, climb and straddle her (so she's on top now), they make out, and it gets hot YJ wants to flip them but SY resists
So basically I need to set the space where YJ literally decides not to move lmao. I'm trying to connect the stars. Maybe she takes it as a challenge when SY tells her to stay put. But then i feel like it's projecting cause im purposely problematic sksksk
ok but does power bottom also means that she gives her a detailed order 'what to do'
i need to revisit the concept of pwer bottom tbh lmao
Seeeeeee that's the thing ime power btms are talkative af and I just couldn't see it. Lmaoooo
right, maybe we dont assign roles here but just  focus on the action dem activity maybe we can list down what can happen: - SY riding YJ
I was thinking SY just handcuffs one of her hand to the headboard lmao but that's for another time. or maybe use her tie lol  Omg, omg I like it. I like it alot. So SY tells her stay put and she stradding her and she starts particularly undressing YJ and she uses the tie to restrain just one of YJs hands. This is a mood skskssksk
just one or both bc, ”no touching”
One just in case SY wants to voluntarily use the free hand to touch... herself adagshsjs
like, it doesnt matter if SY use YJ’s hand on herself or on Young Jin , Im into it aksjakaj
Lmaooooo we on the same page
i have that kink when u just guide ur partner’s hand like that akskakaj
Lmaooooo we on the same page
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 10:45 PM
but its very hot if SY just ‘borrow her hand’ like that
and guide it between her legs
while whispering sth into her ear (im still thinking what lmao)(edited)
anyway what if SY wears lingerie
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10:52 PM
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and thats why she keeps YJ down there
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10:52 PM
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coz she wants the other woman to enjoy the view
ihyuniYesterday at 10:55 PM
Ah okay SY is already ready for bed when YJ comes home in uniform and SY is wearing something a little special. Okay issa vibe.
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 10:55 PM
maybe with YJ's coat outside?
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10:55 PM
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just to hide her lingerie inside?
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10:55 PM
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lmao
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10:55 PM
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RIP Young Jin
ihyuniYesterday at 10:55 PM
You and this coat kink lmao
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 10:55 PM
its a look
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10:57 PM
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also - its practical to just, take off the coat for the 'big reveal' lmao
ihyuniYesterday at 10:58 PM
I'm think lingerie but modest aka something like a slip design but very short lol.
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10:58 PM
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The first question why are you wearing my coat in bed lmaooooo
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 10:59 PM
well she waits from the living room
ihyuniYesterday at 11:03 PM
But see if we do that we need connect A (them in the living room) to B (them getting to the bedroom. Let's focus on breaking backs like glow sticks lol
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:04 PM
akdsjgalkg
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11:04 PM
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i thought they can just make out all the way there
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11:05 PM
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their place is very simple, its just a few steps from the living room to the bed
ihyuniYesterday at 11:07 PM
Well when you set it up like that it's impossible to say not to want it hahah.
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11:08 PM
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Yes I can see this bumping into the wall. Giggling. Okayyyyy
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:08 PM
yep, cute
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11:08 PM
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and when they arrive in the room, SY shove YJ to the bed asap
ihyuniYesterday at 11:10 PM
Forget lingerie what when YJ comes home she's wearing one of her work shirts. Thirst 3636537%
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:10 PM
yes that too
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11:10 PM
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can be both tbh hahahah
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11:10 PM
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the white shirt
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11:10 PM
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only the white shirt
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11:10 PM
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and its kinda too long - so its a look
ihyuniYesterday at 11:11 PM
Lmaoooo or she pulls a wifey and layers but I like only the white shirt
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:14 PM
lmao
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11:14 PM
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i thnk SY would look great wearing YJ's only white shirt tho lmao
ihyuniYesterday at 11:17 PM
I have received the thirst message loud and clear lol.
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:18 PM
alsfjglajg
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11:18 PM
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sry I just have a thing with white shirt lsadjglsadgj
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11:20 PM
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ok so
ihyuniYesterday at 11:21 PM
Oh I thought you were stressing that there was nothing underneath asghfxj
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:21 PM
yea but also the white shirt
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11:21 PM
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a sight
ihyuniYesterday at 11:21 PM
Lmaoooooo got it.
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:23 PM
ok but what happens after SY borrows YJ's hand
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11:23 PM
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aslgdj
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11:24 PM
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tbh imo guiding ur partner's hand would be hotter if they're blindfolded but this is not the case here aksdjgajg
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11:24 PM
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bc SY wants her to see
ihyuniYesterday at 11:29 PM
Um did we reach this place yet lmao. I just remembered her tying the hand. We brainstormed the thirst lmao
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:29 PM
yep
not yet hahah
yea tie her hand only
ihyuniYesterday at 11:33 PM
Oooh I know you said the white shirt is a vibe but it's even more of a hit when its open so maybe she unbuttons it in a few but we'll insert later.
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:33 PM
maybe after YJ got tied up bruh
ihyuniYesterday at 11:34 PM
Brain is slowly melting rn so then
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:34 PM
like after she tie one of YJ's hand
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11:35 PM
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(with her tie)
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11:35 PM
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SY unbuttons 1-2 buttons
ihyuniYesterday at 11:35 PM
We forgot something important lol.
Suave-AlpacaYesterday at 11:35 PM
the strap?
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11:35 PM
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ksadgkjdsagjadsg
Yes, the freaking strap.
ok so before SY shoves YJ to bed
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11:37 PM
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she unbuttons YJ's pants first
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11:37 PM
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and puts the strap on her?
ihyuniYesterday at 11:39 PM
We generally fix this error later. Let's skip back down lol
asdlkgalgj
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11:39 PM
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honestly if SY just rly want to mess up with YJ, she just tie her up and fuck herself givin a show
Anywho so say she goes the whole 9 yards and pleasures herself while on top of YJ even using YJ'S hand the whole shangbang. After she cums... (???)  [YJ is like untie me right now]
"I'm not done with you."
(ok YJ looks mighty fine on screen and my thirst goes off the chart)(edited)
Then a stride for a magical ride.
ya
SY just tugs the strap
before she positions herself at the right spot and takes it all slowly  But I digress so when SY starts to get close and YJ can tell. SY can barely keep her eyes open, maybe YJ reaches over and unties her hand but doesn't act. She's waiting... hmmm
what if SY is into choking and she use YJ's other hand to choke herself lmao while riding her
I'm going to need you to log out for me baby. This is a mess. I can't focus skskshdh
ok but its a sight at least lajgdlakdsjg
It is. Every is a sight cause the white shirt is open,  her hair is probably in her eyes, and the moans are probably nonstop And i am not okay--'
like maybe at first YJ just use her hand to touch YJ around her chest (because the shirt is open) and SY just guide her free hand up and up to her neck, to choke her
The way you're trying to casually slip this in is fucking me up
i mean choking is valid 
maybe SY would start slow, and YJ's hand would just roam around SY's skin - I mean her shirt is just hanging open and YJ just can't resist untl SY puts YJ's hand on her neck like that
"Tell me what to do."
Okay, Ill embrace this. Slowly. Bruh please tell me why my brain just hit that double rated R
(me, zooming on KSH's hands for research now
Im screaming sksgskdvsjd
because choking? asldjglkdsagj
No because earlier she came on YJs hand and my brain was like she put YJ's fingers in her mouth and I have ascended
Maybe SY drags YJ's hand up and up to her mouth so she can taste herself first
We both need to log out jesus
go all out
This is it. The porn of all porns we have composed lmao
but if SY rly wants YJ to watch maybe she sometimes leans back
so u know - its a clear view down there(plus its more torturous for YJ because her free hand can't really reach So Yeon?) wait maybe she can, asdlkgasglj i cant function but anyway she's not close enough to YJ and its torturous enough for YJ lmao
Okay, image noted.
so maybe the choking happens after that lmao
Alright let's progress before I lose what little conscious sense I have left.
Are we still doing the "beg" vibe. After YJ YJ unties her hand when SY is clearly close.
im into it personally
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12:26 AM
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if we went with SY "tell me what to do."
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12:26 AM
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(while choking)
ihyuniToday at 12:29 AM
Okay, the choking has  a permanent place
Suave-AlpacaToday at 12:29 AM
(what would YJ say)
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12:29 AM
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"Fuck me."
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12:29 AM
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but is it in character?
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12:30 AM
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then SY has the ride of her life
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12:30 AM
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(while YJ's choking her)
ihyuniToday at 12:32 AM
Sis wouldn't say fuck me, that's your brain talking.
Suave-AlpacaToday at 12:32 AM
which is why im double asking lmao
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12:32 AM
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because that doesnt seem like her character
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12:32 AM
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(but its hot so)
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12:32 AM
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anyway
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12:32 AM
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what would she say
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12:33 AM
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what would prompt SY to ride her like there's no tomorrow
0 notes
ketterdamns · 6 years
Text
a brief history
so anyway i’ve been doing a lot of work over the last year (hence why im kinda awol and maybe less positive than I used to be) and the biggest thing that has always come up is to stop retreating when I need to be honest about the things that have happened to me, when acknowledging the things in my life that have damaged me and also as an exercise to let trust my friends and others not to use this information to hurt me- the only power of these words in the hands of others is what I perceive them to have. if i give it away freely and own it it can no longer be used to hurt me, or at least, that is the general idea i might regret this. i might not. i just think i need to try because im so so so tired. 
Anyway, under the cut; csa, parental and spousal abuse, rape, trauma,drugs, addiction, basically all of the triggers. a slightly optimistic ending tho!!! 
Additionally; if you read this, please can you in some way acknowledge that u have, via text, whatsapp, dm, pm, messages, likes (no reblogs pls!!)  just so i can keep track of who knows what ty!!!!
its really hard to admit that ive never had a stable home life. never even had a stable home, from the moment i was in the womb my mum was running, away from my dad (who never let her go), from my dad’s mum- who wanted me dead for reasons my mum has never been able to divulge, from poverty and homelessness throughout my formative years. 
That’s when it started maybe, I was about 3-4/5 we ended up having to move in with my uncle (my dads brother) and his wife. it was an uncomfortable situation for all, we were a family of four intruding on newlyweds, but we were desperate and immigrants to a new country without qualifications for work or money to support us or even a job to hold down. My mum tried her best, but my brother was one and i was two years older. I ended up spending a lot of time with my uncle, who often “took me off of her hands” for afternoons. I don’t rly remember those afternoons, except that I would always play up beforehand, not wanting to go. At some point, my aunt caught on, and instead of talking to her husband, or throwing his pedo ass out, she took out her ??jealousy?? on me, and started pinching me so hard i bruised. she would blame me for my uncle’s behaviour. i was a “madame” pretending to be his “princess”, my mum caught her hitting me, and packed our bags immediately, despite my father not allowing us to leave. we had to stay in that house for another two months, and this is when my mum would never want to let me out of her sight again. And this is also the beginning of the pattern that my dad would allow these things to happen to me but I was just a baby. I didn’t understand. I didn’t know what was happening or why they were. No-one spoke to me and I had no one else in my life at that time. 
We spent some really uncomfortable years in uncomfortable places, but honestly being homeless for that year, and then moving into council accommodation was sort of the least of my worries. I was eight years old the time I was sexually and emotionally abused by my other uncle (also my dad’s brother). It was my first trip back to our home country My grandma spent all her time telling me I was awful (it turns out... she’s a piece of shit) all because I refused to call her “Mum”, she wanted to kidnap me and my brother, and idk what else. but we scuppered her plans by not going along with it. It was a very toxic and scary environment, so when my Uncle would invite me into his next door flat, and treat me with kindness, I was overjoyed. Finally, another adult I could trust! My grandparents used to police food, and essentially only allowed me one meal a day. Back in the UK we were very poor, and rarely got to have sweets unless they were gifts from other people, so my uncle already had the perfect tool to entice me. That first summer, I ate sweets and let him pamper me, slowly giving him more and more affection like sitting on his lap etc, because it meant more sweets for me and my brother. he was my favourite person in the world and i was sure that he was the one person i could truly trust and talk to about anything. I used to dream of moving in with him and living peacefully, well fed, in a quiet cosy environment. The next summer, I was nine, and my dad had almost finished his uni, meaning we were expecting more money. I had my fill of sweets. He bought me toys instead. Slowly, his requests for affection turned into demands. Slowly, his affection turned into something twisted and horrible, something dirty. I once tried to raise the point to my grandma, that sometimes my uncle did things that scared me. she told me off for being a coward. I didn’t say anything. I was getting toys, my little brother was being fed, my mum finally had a friend in my dads side of the family in him. I knew enough about unstable homes that the slightest disagreement could lead to homelessness again and I didnt want that. Maybe my silence was my strength. 
This was confirmed when he raped me when I was 12. It is the last time I will ever see that side of the family. I was in shock the whole time, I didn’t know what to do. When we got home, back onto firm cold soil and the safety of our shitty one bedroom council flat in the roughest estate , I opened up to my dad that for years i’d been terrorised by my uncle and afraid of saying something. Dads were supposed to protect their little girls from big bad men, even if that man was their brother. 
All I got for my troubles was another man who began to hurt me. Outraged that I’d ever speak something so horrible my dad began to beat me. Constantly. And if my mum got involved? He’d beat her too. she didn’t even know what was happening, but there was a point she also went silent, and it was all on me to bear the pain I’d tried to share. The following summer, my uncle died in a freak accident When I heard the news I laughed because I couldn’t help myself, and getting hit for it was worth it for the news. I never had to see him again.  He died and I was free. Except my dad never quite forgot what I had said, and he never forgave me for it. 
Anyway by this point I was a teenager, we moved again and constantly over the years until we properly settled and actually bought a house and I had a strong group of friends who didn’t mind my weirdness and my lack of skills. My mum at this point couldnt bear that I was branching out from her bubble, and something snapped in her too, she started to search my room, stalk my friends, refuse to let me out. honestly.. no i dont blame her (even tho her behaviour hasnt changed and im 23, but at the time? it increased how trapped i felt)
I was a teenager and I had a best friend. She loved a boy named DJ who was 18. DJ used to stalk me, and I kept quiet because I knew she liked him and I knew speaking up would cause me more trouble. I could look after her, and myself. DJ assaulted me one night at a party. I shouldn’t have been there and I shouldn’t have been doing what I was doing. I was already experimenting with drinks and drugs because I was dead inside anyway. he hurt me and then told my best friend that i’d hooked up with him and hoodwinked him into getting with me because i wanted to hurt her. within days that story was around school. i was the easy kid who would sleep with anyone for the drama, and i was quiet. i was terrified news would get to my mum, or my little brother who was also starting at that school. but most of all i was terrified of telling my side of the story, and to be hurt more than i was hurting already. I unfriended them all, and even though DJ continued to stalk me i kept quiet. DJ sent me a necklace with a dove, explaining the significance was that the dove was my innocence or some other weird creepy crap. my mum found it in the bin where id tried to bury it under rubbish i told her a fraction of the truth, I was being harassed by a boy and I didn’t welcome his advances. I didn’t tell her it was already too late. The school of course told him to keep away, and he did for the most part, and one time he tried to corner me while I was skiving off of a class and there was no one around, I ran and went to tell a teacher. I got told to “grow up” and sometimes “we have to get along with people we dont like”. I was the villain in their eyes. I swore  I would do everything in my power to get out of this school, go to the grammar in a new city where my reputation . DJ was arrested this year for online grooming an d sharing child pornography, and it honestly breaks my heart that its been going on for so long. maybe i should have said more, but who to? 
My time at school wasn’t all bad. And i had my first real positive experience with an older man. My english teacher once caught me unawares and I had a panic attack at being alone with a man-- he was gentle and kind, and worked with me to get to where i wanted to be grades-wise. he let me borrow his books and told me stories about his own son and i understood what real love meant, and it broke me that i’d never experienced it. 
My brother had grown so big now, and threatened my dad. if he ever lay another finger on one of us under our roof, my brother would kill him. my brother spent his childhood learning to fight, he’s in the runnings for the Olympics. My dad recognised the threat was real. And never hit me when my brother was home. However, when my brother wasn’t home... that was another story. my silence then was another kind of strength. I couldnt tell him the truth, because if he followed through on this threat, his life would be over. My dad got more sneaky, he would avoid my face, he’d grab my ankle and twist it so tight that it’s now forever fucked up. 
Despite all my fucked-up ness I did make it to grammar school, despite my parents not wanting me to go there. And im so glad i did. I finally had two years with minimal assault. My dad hurt me sometimes? The first night after my induction class because summer break, my dad took my prized hockey stick- one I’d worked long days to afford, and smashed it on my leg. I had to get crutches and didn’t leave my house for most of the summer, because I didn’t want to explain what happened. I couldn’t play my sport ever again properly. I lied to my friends and told them i was in my home country for the summer. i legit did not leave my house unless it was for doctors appts. 
 occasional nights he would be tired of me doing nothing but homework or making projects, or being loud. Alternately, he’d hate it when suddenly i became withdrawn and uncommunicative. when i physically couldn’t move etc. anyway turns out these were symptoms of my MI which wouldn’t be diagnosed for a long while, despite trying to find what was wrong with me from this point onwards.  but!!! for the most part! it was great! my school was in another city! i had freedom for a couple hours every day to do what i wanted! i made friends who embraced my weirdness! i had no reputation and i had my very own laptop finally so i could finally have some privacy!
too much privacy, i refused to give my mum my laptop password. hearing this, my dad threw my laptop down the stairs. 
i used what little money i had from part time jobs to fix it, but its something im resentful of to this day. my mum, in her eagerness to protect me, just let him hurt me again. 
anyway blah blah blah i moved to london and it was amazing i ran away i was free everything was going to change and i was finally going to be the person i always knew i was destined to be! chic and cosmopolitan and cool and confident and most importantly, safe, and comfortable, and in control. And I was. and then three weeks before halloween it happened again. i’d been away from home for two months now, and i’d started dabbling in harder drugs than weed, but that night i was not high. i was not in withdrawal. i was only drunk. i got raped again. this time, i did report it, but only because my housemates knew it had happened. i got rushed to A&E where they are legally required to call the police. the police took me to their HQ and i was interviewed. they arrested him. none of this was my choice, and my lack of silence led to a lack of control. I know ive been detailed already, but i wont go into detail about the rape kits they have and the questions i got asked and the journalists who dogged me and the nosy gossips who wanted to know the juicy deets. I don’t want to go into detail about how i realised I was a victim and was always going to be a victim, and i cant go into detail about the most recent abuses, not yet. All I know is i once thought i was in love with a boy called ‘T’, and what he did to me was worse because he made me believe this was all I could get and that I had to settle. He made me believe that him getting off on my trauma was love, instead of him picturing me as a child repeatedly brutalised by my male relatives. The moment I came to my senses and he was gone, I realised I was alone again. I failed my second year of uni, because the day before my final exam, my rapists wife found my house in london, idk how. She and her child begged me to help her husband’s appeal. I sympathised with her, she was a non-native with broken english looking after her kid. She reminded me of my mum. I told her for her chid’s sake and for her sake, I couldn’t. She cursed me and nothing has been the same since. actually, the lovely people of tumblr helped me raise the funds to complete summer school and carry on with my life. i now hold a masters degree. i remember each and every one of u who donated or signal boosted. i also remember my choice to keep his wife out of it, and not mention her. silence was golden. 
This year my rapist  was deported after raping another person when he was released for good behaviour. 
anyway. despite all of this magnitude of shit that has happened to me. despite my numerous addictions that im still working thru (im sorry if u knew me when i was nothing but a junkie. at 19/20 I was not a good person and anything I said that was thoughtful or provocative came from a bad place. I gave bad advice and abused my medication alongside brown and alcohol. My manic episodes got worse than I’ve ever experienced and usually led to me some very dark very scary places. I’m mostly better now but the last year has Been A Lot. I tried to kill myself twice. Once, I was saved by police, which is... embarrassing and I lied my ass off (and brandished the fact i was a MASTERS STUDENT OF LAW and they had entirely the wrong end of the stick) and another time, i was saved by chance. I am making so much progress tho. I’m proud of me. I’ve become more independent. I’m not afraid to speak out when I’m dissatisfied now. I know strength comes from knowing what you want and what you don’t want, not settling for the worst because unknown reactions in my imagination are worse than whatever reality has in store. 
im graduating from my masters next week. i feel as tho ive lost a lot of friends and people i cared about- all i can say is im sorry. i’m trying. but if i fuck up, its on me. if i speak too loudly and it hurts you, please tell me. if i dropped away, its because i had to work on me, and im sorry, and im ready to come back, if you’ll have me.  I’m really excited about the future, but im scared too. the last three months have been so hard and every day i feel like giving up again, but I won’t. there has to be a reason i survived all this, and im yet to find it, but i hope i will. im still going thru shit. my dad is still the worst. but i have a really lovely partner who is so so so patient with me- more than i deserve, im in touch with a doctor and a sleep therapist, my brother is looking out for me and im getting in touch with old friends, and im making new ones all the time. thank you for sticking by me, and sorry for the long read. i just had to get it out there you know? its my truth and the silence was killing more than anything else in this stupid story is. ive left lots of details out, but parts of my story interlink with others and other parts im still holding onto, i cant share everything online i think thats enough oversharing for a long long time. 
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cheswirls · 6 years
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a quick sum-up of che’s future career plans, bc reasons
im halfway through the dive!! anime show that came out this summer season, and i’m having a lot of thoughts, and plus i finished going through all the footage i missed today of skate america while i was at a bball game, and it’s made me realize different things i guess? 
it might be mid-long length so its going under a cut, but to gain intereststart off, this is all about my desire to be an athletic trainer for the usa olympic center at colorado springs, co !
ive been an at(now when you see that abb. you know what it means hah!! not assistant teacher hmm) student since my freshman year of high school, and i’ve loved it a whole bunch. back then i was set on going to columbia U for their writing program, and i wanted to major in graphic design afterwards/during/it wasnt super planned out i was a fr. i didnt know what bfa or mfa stood for yet. it wasnt until end of sophomore year than i thought about being an at for realsies.
but i also still loved gd. so there was a confliction there.
junior year i took a break from working volleyball in the fall and did my one and only year of football and it was terrible primarily bc the team i worked with didnt know how to function as a group and half the group were selfless bitch whores but like thats another storyyy, secondly bc i jus really discovered i didnt care abt football at all. it was mostly for the experience and i gained it and i liked it bc i hung out w a lot of people from helping out w varsity (i was one of two our of the five juniors that had been there since my fr year and was only on jv bc it was my first year w football, but one of the seniors had to work a bunch so when they needed an extra person i was the one w the most experience so i was w them a lot,) point was it was fun!!! and you have fun w ppl you like that you dont work w all the time and i shouldnt say fun bc lots of times it was awful,
basically! it was fun being w the varsity trainers which were the seniors and the other junior that had been around since fr year. volleyball was fun but it had always been a one-at-student-per-team sport , so it was different jus being w other ats that shared the same team and not the same sport(which in the us is made up of at least three different teams, a fr,jv,and varsity). it was a more open environment and so it inspired a lot of talk with the at grad students we had that semester (we got 3-4 every semester in a partnership w the D1 uni in town, it was always cool to hear stories from them!) and anyway i remember talking w a couple of the grads one practice and we were discussing all the different occupations athletic trainers could have, and what they wanted to work with in the future, and the topic veered towards professional sports and the olympics.
i thought it was really cool when we were talking about it, and then we got busy and it flew out of my mind. i dont remember when it came back and became a focus, but sometime before my senior year, i had decided i wanted to work at the olympic level.
real quick i mentioned gd and the struggle, so to bring that into focus, my junior year i took a whole bunch of different tech classes (gd&i, compsci, webtech) and in one of those, i had the opportunity to go to a ... i cant remember what the term was for it, but it was kinda an event for gd students and it had a little competition and stuff, and it was really fun! nd you got a lot of info abt the community college hosting it and i learned their program was really good, so the gd versus at internal struggle continued, and i remember talking to my sponsor teacher (she actually taught all three of my tech classes that year aaa i loved her) about how i didnt know what to do and shit and i dunno what she told me but like, i think she was trying to be encouraging but she basically said it was up to me, like she didnt try and nod me into a direction, that i can recall.
so SOMEHOW bc i honestly cannot remember, by senior year i’ve decided that im gonna jus fuck it and pick BOTH and double major in gd and athletic training. AND i had it all planned out, where i was gonna get a degree in gd and open up an online business, and then go into a masters program for at and then enter into the olympic field. 
by this point creative writing is still cool and a great hobby but i couldnt possibly double major AND have a minor that’d be too much. id still love to take a cw course tho one day.
basically a buncha crazy stuff happened that first semester but by winter break i had an acceptance letter to a uni a couple hours north of home with a good accredited undergrad program (accredited basically means you graduate w a masters in four years so its fasttracked which woulda been great but uh..) and by the time i found out that next semester that they were doing away with the accredited program i was already too emotionally invested to consider panic-switching(panic bc it was february and id already been admitted hah...) but i decided it’d be okay. basically if you dont remember/werent around one of my school’s head ats died in a car crash died around early october ‘16. she went to undergrad where i go now, and i’d talked to her about it september that semester wondering if she knew anything abt their program and uh surprise, she’d done the same program small world. after the funeral in november and a ton of thought i applied there. (november was.. crazy in general last year. rly crazy)
may was when i started adding on sports to the future olympics job, bc i started thinking about it and after finally getting a friend to watch yuri on ice, he started making his was through all of sochi’s figure skating stuff, and then the 2010 vancouver olympics, and i decided i wanted to recap a bit on that too.
the 2010 olympics was really my first experience with figure skating. i’m a west texas gal and so theres not a lot out here to get exposed to, so seeing these best-of-the-best class sports was fun, and the earliest experience i can remember of such. i was in fifth grade so i dont remember a ton, but i do remember being captivated by korea’s yuna kim, who won gold that year in fs. shes an fs legend at this point, so if you’re into figure skating and don’t know who she is, go look her up. you wont be disappointed.
in 2012 was the london olympics. i remember a lot from it, like watching the opening ceremony with my parents and seeing the queen jump out of a helicoptor(which is like,, still cool to this day wow) and being fascinated my michael phelps and all the swimming he did so grandly. it was also my first real exposure to diving. the oldest i could recall anything abt the sport was at a pizza hut somewhere.. in town i think, and i was w my best friend at the time and my mom was there so i think maybe we were on the way back from the lake??? sounds right, i think. and we were talking abt how i always held my nose when i went underwater bc i didnt know how to not get water all up my nostrils and be underwter(and i still dont to this day aha) and she mentioned like, joining a diving team would be cool! would help me get over it and all! and i like recalling it dunno what she was talking abt bc we lived in dirt city nothing so i highly doubt there was or is any sort of diving sport happening. swimming, yeah maybe, there were lessons at pools and bodyworks areas around town, competitive teams im not sure tho, but not diving like at all so??? dunno.
so my next and technically first real experience with it was watching the london olympics. and i thought, wow, this is so neat!! i watched from that one day like the opening events, and i think i was old enough to search online like yea i had a laptop by then so i looked up the schedule for the things i wanted to see most of, and i ended up watching i think most of the diving events (i missed a couple for.. archery, i think? maybe?) and absolutely loving it. iunno what it was, maybe something i never thought i could do?(bc not hold my nose?? while i dove???????? scaryy) but i enjoyed it a bunch.
i was older when sochi was a thing, my 8th grade year. i was able to appreciate things a lot more. when i tuned into events, tony hawk and snowboarding were the main focus, but figure skating was on a lot as well. i had a tv in my room by that point, so if i didnt like what was playing on the main tv, i could go watch another event. i learned a lot of names and faces through that, and so while my bff was watching it our senior year if i was with him id point out skaters and their nationalities and stuff, like yuzuru hanyus always been a modern day household name w figure skating, but i leanred abt him BECAUSE of the sochi olympics, and he was one of the ones i’ve never forgotten. i really really liked it, so much that i watched worlds after, and around the same time my fr year, i tuned in to just the worlds championship again. i didn’t pick up trying to watch grand prix(which is their regular season, for those unaware) season until my junior year, and most of it was day-or-two-late videos from youtube, since the ice channel i think it a paid-for thing (i still dont know much abt it hah) and nothing was on tv otherwise, aside from the skate america event. but since that first time after sochi, ive always been around watching worlds fs near the beg of each year. i’d familiarized myself by senior year with the fs world, and actually,
early (i think march?) of my junior year, i searched up trying to find a figure skating anime at the time. and what did i find?? ginban, the only figure skating anime at the time. i watched like maybe all of one episode, it was abt a girl who shared her body w the ghost of a former figure skater while she was competing in events, and it was.. okay? lackluster, in the animation dept, but it was a 2005 show so.. yeah.
so after that i was like kk that wasnt good lets find another. and i didnt. not yet, anyway. instead, i found an announcement for violet evergarden’s animated adaptation, and yuri on ice, a realistic adaptation of the sport of figure skating. thats bolded bc its important. i found that shit abt yoi before it even had a promo poster, certainly before the pv came around that got everyone hyped up. i found it bc i was looking for figure skating in the first place. in fact, i think when the pv came out and got popular, i didnt even relate it to the upcoming fs anime i’d read about previously. it took me a bit to connect the dots. 
watching yuri on ice at the same time as the gp 2016 season was surreal, but really interesting. i got my bff into it before the second to last episode came out, and i only remember that bc he finally showed any interest when he found something on twitter abt it being gay (newsflash/// hes gay, and before yoi his fav show was no6 bc that was as close as it got. he still rly likes it, we both do, but his solid favc is now definitely yoi. representation matters and all) and was like well now i HAVE to watch it and i was all yes it ends soon so pls. and he watched it twice in a weekend, and thrice before the finale came out, and then a few more times after that, iunno how many times but certainly more thn i have(i went back after the .. maybe ep 10? w/e ending had the after party reveal that changed everything, so i went back to analyze everything before the next ep) and between the week of 11 and finale 12, he started watching the sochi fs competition, and then the 2010 after the show ended w ep 12. 
seeing this great fs show and getting a friend into the world of figure skating really renewed my love for it all. before the semester went out i went back and watched the reruns of the sochi fs stuff. and by may i’d decided i wanted to cosider that to be the sport i worked with.
with diving, it took a similar twist. in the form of the rio 16 olympics. i was all over that shit, i downloaded an nbc app on my phone so i could watch events live while i traveled with volleyball to a tournament in dallas and while i was at practice w them at home and generally jus away from the house and a tv. i planned that shit out had a schedule and everything for what i was watching live, and a lot of it was swimming, but a whoooole lot of live stuff was the diving. 
in the hotel room in dallas the tv would always be on to w/e olympics events were airing at the time, either track or diving tho, one or the other, or recaps. quite a few girls ended up in the room in the evening and we’d all do stuff and watch in passing at the same time, and it was suuuuuper fun. watching the chinese women perform flawlessly and walk away w all the gold was fun, but finding a good commentator to actually say such was a disheartening challenge( one of the most memorable moments w live commentary that year was hearing a woman say of one of the chinese ladies that she’d done better before, after they revealed her personal best score ever like rly cmon be unbiased and jus passionate abt the sport youre covering pls.
ive always been super fond of the diving scene. it may not be as much as fs, but honestly, i wish i grew up in an area w a diving team now, or wish i could try it out now, bc thats how much fun it seems. i still wanna go up to the big city like 30min away from uni and learn to ice skate in the civic center there, but hands down if i had to pick a sport to join tomorrow or die i’d pick diving. 
so also by may, and throughout the culmination of senior year, diving was the second sport on the olympic to-train-for list. you get a five-year contract w the olympics, now i think it’s usa as a whole and i think its by center so say, if i get a job in colorado springs i cant apply in another five years to chula vista or even like lake placid, but iunno for sure. the five-year thing is involved somehow bc i’ve heard it from a physical therapist and trainer-that-works-in-a-sports-med-clinic duo in one body named sarah, who’s been contracted out from the clinic by my high school since junior year also, bc she knows people who’ve worked w the olympics, and then another from church that worked w olympics that knows my family uh iunno how well but i know of him, i think he also works in the clinic as some sort of on-hand surgeon but a diff person than who sarah knew. so its five years somehow and then i’ll take my bfa in gd and open my online business and do that from a studio at home and look after my owl/cat pet combo.
since may, it had been ‘olympics, with either figure skating or diving’. and it stayed that for a long time. now, since a couple weeks ago, and this is again while gp season is happening for fs, its diving. i wanna work w the usa olympic diving team as their team athletic trainer, and i cant do it this summer bc i have to have completed two years of uni, instead of a certain standing, like be a junior, but so NEXT summer, before my senior year of uni, (i came in a sopho so 6 sem only ah) i’m applying for an internship at the center in colorado springs, and that’s the team i hope i work with. 
now i tell people, diving, but if i get offered figure skating, i’ll take it, but diving is the goal now. if i love it and wanna continue professionally, great, i can do that and have an online gd shop. and if i decide i want something different? i’ll work olympics and then join w a professional-level figure skating i actually dunno how it works. coach, and their skater in turn. coach, with multiple skaters under them. a culmination of diff usa skaters. w/e, something in the professional fs world.
and thats uh, thats it! dive has been so much fun to watch, and i realize i talk a lot on here about working w basketball and being an at student in general and the vast majority have no idea what i mean, so hopefully this clarifies. thank you!!
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photonconductor · 7 years
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i dont have an ao3 but shout out to my homeboys
once upon there was a gay on th e moon bc of a really lovng alternate au idea where elc turened BAD and klaus had a 1000 year nap and it'd take too long to fucking explain this so just roll with it ok. this gay--its elcrest btw hes also a Bad Boy now; he rly likes hot topic and thinks those t shirts with sarcastic sayings are actually rly funny but we all know they aren't--was feleing emo bc he couldn't see his bf xen o bc he betrayed him. so he stayed in his room whining abt how fgay he was until eve showed up
"hey whats wrong elc mother is here for u" even tho shes like 5000 years old and looks like shes 2 and also a rock (but im not rockist guys i promise). elc looked at her with his optics shining in the pale argentate light. good thing hes the seme here bc otherwise he'd start crying. in reality he rly wanted to fucking bone xeno bc obviously they had a lot of gay sex b4 they tried to kkill his mom once nad staring at rocks all day kinda sucks.
a;so burnign alive but hes kind of over that phase.
"im sad my bf left me for 1000 years can i pls go back to earth my raging hard on can't be satisfied bc rocks. my dicks not a jack hammer even tho im jacking it all the time (thats what guys do right bitch i dont know)" eve was so offended she put her hands on her giant rock self thats not just herself. its rly fucking complicated shut up u came here for the gay sex not instructibles on how physical forms manifest.
"we dont say ROCKS in this household young man!!!!"
"BUT MOOOMMMMM sorry i forgot to turn off my seme voice lemme adjust my mic it happens when my dick is hard" elcrest coughed twice "ok sounds good, BUT MOM I RLY NEED TO NUT. YOU KNOW NUT I'M SAYING... ITS ALL OR NUTTING BUT MOSTLY NUTTING IN XENO'S SWEET HOT BUNS"
"stop talking abt nuts u disgusting boy fine, god, if u leave me alone u gaylord"
and then eve punched him so hard in the dick that elcrest landed on earth in a giatn crater. how hes still alive is bc he still had some continues left like in mario even though this is a srpg game. once elc recovered he struck a pose and laughed evilly while twirling his mustache.
"finally...... I have RETURNED for xeno's hot man breasts! the world cannot stop me now!!" he cackly cackkled and quickly ripped off the fake mustache he put on just for this one scene. then elc went on a quest to find where klaus was and bc the author is too lazy to write any tansitional scenes.
elc found him chilling in his bed reading a book that was called Sweets and You: Do sweets make u inherantly Gay? elcrest made the PFFT noise. ofc they make u gay, fuckiing idiot book. he could write better than that author. in fact, elcrest was gonna do that when he got home bc obviously if this trash is published any shit elc wrote would be good.
NO! he had to focus! but he couldnt stop staring at xenos man boobs and felt his dick get hard again. elc got a nose bleed too bc thats what happens in anime right. i played persona 4 i know what im about
"damn u xeno." elc said thru his nosebleed and klaus looked up bc the author cant fucking rmemeber who is klaus and who is xeno and was surprised i remmebred his name but could not remember remember the 5th of novemember
"what"
"XENO IT IS I" since h e was caught red handed he just kickflipped through the window anyway. he did a sick flip then stood in the middle of klauses room. klaus made a gay gaspp
"alto! what are u doing hre!?" klaus said, bc in this AU that was his codename. elc wanted to be currently doing that but eve said no. fuck his mom. except please dont bc i know you sick fucks are thinking abt it.
"I HAVE COME TO BRING YOU BACK TO THE GAY SIDE, XENO WE HAVE COOKIES. bc i really miss that bammin slammin bootilicious sex we used 2 have and you are in fact bammin slammin bootilicious. also have u heard the word and gospel of our savior mother" elc said gayly
"dude no please stop preaching in my house im a changed man now" xeno pirouetted out of bed
"cmon man im ur seme u cant refuse we made like a yaoi blood oath u cant go back on ur word" elc pushed him back on thebed bc he'd have his ass yet anyway so no real use getting up. bc what is consent anyway hes Bad
"o shit really huh" klaus paused in thougt and bad elc laughed evilly. his plan was working!! all he had 2 do was the final touches! i mean besides touching xenos dick or whatever we're not yet. sorry u have to suffer for ten more paragraphs for sweat boy on boy. elc then turned around an produced a kitty keyboard from the recesses of his coat tails. xeno made the :O face and elc sat down bc playing while standing rly fuckin g sucks
"i wrote this for u on the moon so you'll be hypnotized by my sick beats" then he pulled the mic out of the keyboard and made a sick beatbox noise. No i dont know what the fuck it sounds like just google it. klaus blushued and made another gay gasp and elc made the >:3 face
then be started to play the piano keyboard. he was playing cruel angel thesis, their theme song that they had decided at 1am while xeno was drunk af.  it was their theme song despite none of them speaking fucking japanese but they just felt it in their SOULS. it was rly gay. elc was going so fucking hARD that his hard on was getting 40 hard ons. and thats four tens the hard ons. and its rad.
except the ebst part was it was all in meows so it spoke 2 klaus' furry soul.
klaus nyaed softly in surprise and suddenly all his memories of being xneo were restored!!! he gave into the desire that he craved in his soul and opened his big man arms bc for some reaon everyone thinks dudes are thirsty af. dont ask me why
"elc1!1 pls take me!! but be gentle my ass hasnt been ravaged in 1000 years (sick reference to hilda and altos magical wedding night by sorunort like, comment, subscribe for more sick referneces like this one)" xeno mewled like afucking furry and elc nodded once. xeno walked up to elc an touched his man boob sensually even tho xeno is like 60 feet taller than elc just imagine it ok
elc now has sunglasses just bc i think its a funny image
"xeno...... lets do it" elc said softly
"o h elc senpai......." xeno meowed
"and i'll keep my sunglasses on bc i hate the sun #moonlifeforever" and xeno gayzed into his emotion shields sensuallyier. then elc kissed him passionately and their tongues battled for dominance but we all know klaus is a fucking bottom bitch as stated in hilda and altos magical wedding night by sorunort paragraph 17 and 18 bc it was a dialogue.
then elc ripped off his clothes bc hes fucking JACKED and jACKED OFF and xeno gay gasped forlike the third time in this fic. elc was fuckign shredded. legends told of his abs but this time it was real. almost like the fact that shaved ice flavors dont actually exists the syrup is just food coloring.  his dong dangled in the breeze and xeno was turned tf on so he took off his clothes too bc hes not a god damn animal god whats wrong with u elc.
except elc didnt take off the sunglasses like he promised so those were still on dont worry readers i got you covered.
"get on ur knees dude and give me a wet willy but like on my dick" elc demanded
"wtf no"
"dude u cant say no its a smutfic"
"ok yeah i guess i kinda do like sucking dick or somethign"
"PREPARE TO EAT YOUR LAST DICK, XENO" elc cackcled and then xeno succed his dick like no tomorrow. elc practically creamed right there bc he couldnt get his rocks off on the moon for 1000 years (hahaha no im not gonna stop makign rock jokes). also xeno has no gagreflex bc he succed dick like a thousand times. once that was over elc just punched his dick in xenos hot cross buns and xeno meowed again
"why are u still a furry after 1000 years" elc asked but continued to Ravage The Promised Ass
"do u nyat like it erucu-kun???" xeno purred and elc shook his head
"no ur still banging its ok"
NUT THEN (i wanted to write but but i typoed and decided to keep it its funnier this way) xenos ass started 2 glow with a new holy light
"WHAT tHE FUCK" elc yelled
"my ass was actually the only way we could turn u good again! the more u fuck me the gooder u are!" and elc gasped gayily! no! his plan was working against him! he could alredy feel the goodness (haha get it bc fucking is hot i guess) turning him good! he had 2 pull out but found he couldnt. xeno was just too bammin slammin bootlicious
"HOW DARE YOU TRICK, I, ELCREST THE CONDICKTOR" he roared and xeno was tuned on again bc roaring is prolly a furry thign im not a furry im sorry
"it was for ur own good elc bc i love you!" xeno dokied so hard there were shoujo sparkles and even elc got shoujo sparkles. his azure optics glew like stella glow and u could almost see constellations in them. except there were sunglasses so u couldnt actually see it but the reader can. xneo was right. he was his tru  love..... not the Mother..... his mom was lame anyway all she did was talk to rocks
"xeno.............." elc said wiwstfully before bangin xeno harder. their bangin was so intense everyone could hear it in the kngihts barraks. it was so loud that even ana in her coma woke up for like a second to be like The Gays are At It Again. soon enough the banging was sucessful. elc glew in a beautiful magical girl ligtht and he was become good again. xeno shed a single tear but licked it away
"im cured! xeno ur ass did it! plus that was hot" elc smiled and im pretty sure xeno cried bc look at that man. hes so beautiful. please take the $2 from my purse. they embraced in a gay way. it was cute and xeno did a thumbs up and ana's face appeared at 20% opacity in the bg and she was also winking
"elc i am so glad u are back and i love u" then they made out. for a rly long time too bc theyre so fucking GAY good lord how could stella glow keep this under wraps. then they decidd they had to punch eve in the rock bc she was a dickw hile elc was being emo and stuff. BUT FIRST, xeno got porked lke 80 more times b4 then bc 1000 years does a lot do u.
the end remember to like, comment, subscribe for more fics like this one, seeya
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trulymadlysydney · 7 years
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(dick appointment anon #2 lmfaooo) okay so there's this kid in my economics class who is SO FUCKING HOT LEMME TELL YOU. so this whole quarter i've been peeping him and like every time we talk we're always so so so flirty with each other and other's comment on it so it's not like all in my head lmfao. ANYWAY last class (which was last thursday) we got assigned this project and we were paired as partners (i still thank God) so i basically invited him to my apartment so we could work on it (1/?)
and so he texts me today and is like "we still on for tonight?" and he texts me this shit at like 6 am this morning so i'm still hella tired and i'm like "oh shit what did i do" not realizing I TOLD HIM TO COME OVER TO LITERALLY DO SCHOOL WORK?? IM SUCH A HOE??? so i remember and confirm the plans and what not. so i didn't have any classes today so i just went to the library the whole day bc i'm bffs with one of the librarians lowkey. BIH THIS BOY IS THERE HE JUST WALTZ IN AT LIKE 11 am (2/?)(3/?) ALL HIGH AND MIGHTY AND IM NOT KIDDING YOU I TRIED SO DESPERATELY TO HIDE FROM THIS BITCH BC I HAD NO MAKEUP ON AND MY HAIR WAS DOING JTS ON THING I LOOKED LIKE A FUCKIN SEWER RAT BUT LOW AND BEHOLD (i need a name for him let's just use his actual name) CHRIS FINDS ME AND SMILES AND DOES THE HEAD NOD THING YOU KNOW WHAT IM TALKING ABOJT GIRL4/?) and he walks over to me and sits down I DONT KNOW HOW TO DESCRIBE THIS BASICALLY ANNOYINGLY COCKY TMH HARRY WANNABE SITTING ACROSS FROM YOU IN A SCHOOL LIRBARY WITH A BIG ASS SMIRK ON HIS FACE??? and we just start talking and shit but then he's like "ok i'll let you do your work lol sorry for interrupting" but me being the thirsty ass bitch i am go "oh no it's fine i was kinda lonely anyway" but i go to retrieve a book i needed for my lit paper (literal bullshit) and CHRIS FOLLOWS ME(5/?) i have no idea if this makes sense but my library at my school is huge so the book cases like move to reveal more books so i'm at the back of this godforsaken library and this BITCH CHRISTOPHER IS STILL ON MY ASS AND IM BENDING OVER TO FIND THIS DAMN MASTERPOST and i finally found it right so i turn around and HES SO CLOSE TO ME HIS MOUTH WAS INCHES AWAY I COULD FEEL HIS DAMN BREATH I WAS SHTTINF MYSELF BUT I THINK I LOWKEY CURVED HIM BC I JUST HOPPED OUTA THE WAY BC I RLY DIDNT FEEL LIKE(6/?) doing a dumb ass movie scene (kissing in the library how cliche) so we walk back to my little desk and he just goes "i gotta head out but i'll see you tonight then?" and so i'm like ye it's lit daddy see u then. girl i do not mean to exaggerate he put his god carved hand on my shoulder and like squeezes it (u know the gesture hot boys do sometimes idk how to explain) and smiles down at me (bc i was sitting obv) and then leaves I LITERALLY NUTTED BYE(7/?) idk how i haven't gotten blocked from sending u shit by now but let's continue. later that night (i told him to come over at 6) it was like 6:15 SO THIS FUCKBOY WAS LATE he finally shows up and i'm going to skip all the boring shit but about 30 minutes in (we were actually doing work i swear) he takes my BOOK OUTA MY HAND??? AND GOES "so idk if you feel the same way and i know this is kinda weird timing but you're cute and super funny i just wanted to let u know i kinda have a crush on u(8/?) I AM AT LOSS FOR WORDS YO I HAD NO IDEA WHAT IN THE FUCK TO DO LIKE??? IS THAT SHIT NOMRAL I WAS LOST but ig i got shy bc I DO AROUND CUTE BOYS SOMETIMES ESPECIALLY WHEN THEY ADMIT THEH GOT A CRUSH ON ME so was like teasing me on how red my cheeks were and all that shit god how disgusting. long story short he darted tickling me AND A BITCH HATES BEING TICKLED I WILL SWING AT YOU but i kid u not it turned into an unrealistic fanfic we ended up on the ground (him on bottom me on top)(9/9) AND I JUST WENT FOR IT IT WAS ONE OF THOSE TENSION KISSES YOU FEEL ME AND YOOO IT GOT HEATED SO DAMN FAST HE KEPT TELLING ME HOW GOOD OF A KISSER I WAS AND GIRL HIS TINY LITTLE MOANS I STG I WAS IN HEAVEN BUT ME BEING the nun i had to be a cock block and was all like "maybe we should go slow" and lord bless he was breathing so damn hard and his hair was EVERYWHERE and he just nodded so slowly i was shook as hell but then we cuddled & watched dory this boy is bf material would YOU SAY??-----------OKAY SO at first I though you were gonna have sex in the library and I was like YOOOO but then when you curved him I laughed because that is me as hell. Anyway YEAH WTF THIS IS SO CUTE AND IM SO HAPPY ABOUT ALL OF THIS?!?!? MAKE IT HAPPEN PLEASE I AM SO HERE FOR THIIIIIS
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tigren · 7 years
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im going to do the 30 day neopet challenge but im going to do it in one post under a readmore bc i will almost certainly forget it within the first week if i do it the proper way, i don’t think anyone is going to care about my responses in particular and i don’t want to spam people daily, and most importantly: im super bored right now
Day 01: When did you start playing Neopets and how old is your current account?
my first account got purged but i saved the date that i created it. i had my 14 year neopets anniversary last month WOW!!! my current account will turn 11 in may.
Day 02: How did you find out about Neopets?
i think my brother made a neopets account when he was like 10ish, he didn’t get super into it but my dad also made an account and got really involved with the site!! i was like 6 or 7 and i just really liked poogle solitaire (rip). i don’t think i actually knew how to play but it amused me and my dad let me continue playing because he got stuff for it. but eventually i guess he got sick of me being on my account and made one for me. my first username was bleubaby_72, which is named after a doll i had as a much younger child (Blue Baby, misspelled) and i don’t think the 72 means anything. my first pet was a yellow aisha whose name i don’t remember... my dream pet was a desert aisha (would still die for a UC desert aisha, i wouldn’t say theyre my fave but THE SENTIMENTAL VALUE.......)
Day 03: Favourite Neopets species?
i love boris! and yurbles recently shot up my list of fave pets, but i don’t like a lot of their colors. i generally prefer neopets that are mammalian (but not as a rule necessarily) and have features of real animals but can’t necessarily be pinpointed as a certain real species. like, aishas and wockies are cats, gelerts and lupes are dogs, grarrls are tyrannosaurus rex, elephantes are duh. and thats fine and good i still like a lot of those species! but yurbles for example have that hedgehog/bear thing going on but they also have their weird spiral ears and neck ruff. and thats my favorite thing. 
i also really like unis because i’ve been a horse girl since childhood n never grew out of it, and they have great colors. and aishas were my first fave and will always be one of my favorites. so i can appreciate pets that can more easily be represented by 1 animal. 
Day 04: How many pets do you own and which is your favourite?
ummmmmm 14 i think? there might be a few other pets rotting on sides that i kinda forgot about, i’m too lazy to check. Abbur is my favorite, he’s my pink bori baby boy and i just care about him with all my heart. i really like his customization and none of my pets have any real “stories” or anything but most of them have vague personalities and histories and his is more developed than any of my other pets. Alabryss is another fave, i’ve had him for FOREVER and he’s always been a uni but he’s gone thru a billion color changes. he’s royal now and will almost definitely be royal for the rest of his life. his name is a misspelling of the petpet Alabriss (i think i made him 1 day after they were released) which i didn’t totally do on purpose.. like obviously i got the name from the petpet but i didn’t realize until a while later that i had subconsciously used it. anyway i’m not complaining, i still love him and he has an alabriss petpet named yuni
Day 05: Favourite Paint Brush colour?
OHH HBOY that’s hard!!! off the top of my head w/o looking through colors or anything i like royal and desert bc they’re generally more Elaborate w/ the clothes options and stuff. but i also have a big appreciation for cheap colors like cloud and ghost.. they look good on almost every pet imo. i like starry a lot too, big obnoxious iconic neopets stars. i especially like when starry pets have orange accents.
Day 06: Favourite Labray only colour?
is robot labray only? robot is cool. i guess there’s the robot zapper thing from the dr sloth plot forever ago but does that count?? i think chocolate would be my next choice. i can’t even remember all the labray only colors
Day 07: Favourite Petpet species?
this is so hard!!! i’ve always loved petpets SOO much. i’ve recently started to have a big appreciation for the super like.. generic, classic petpets.. like the kinds youd find in the neopia central petpet shop. they have a certain charm to them and i love them. i’ve always liked crokabeks a lot, theyre sooooo square shaped!! square crows! gruslen & doglefox were my faves as a kid. 
Day 08: Favourite Petpet colour?
birthday is rly cute
Day 09: Favourite Petpetpet species?
uhhhhh i don’t know all the petpetpets and never had THAT much of an interest in them. what’s the one that looks like a praying mantis??? i’ve always liked those
ok wait i just looked up a list and petpetpets can be p cute actually. i still like the praying mantis dude, moach, but i also love: cooty, fleaf, lightmite, and zytch. i don’t tend to like art of petpetpets in games and stuff but they’re cute in their regular images.. theyre so small......
Day 10: Favorite Neopian world?
UHHHHHHH since i was a kid i’ve always liked: faerieland, lost desert, and mystery island.
Day 11: Which team do you pick for the Altador Cup and why?
always darigan citadel. i don’t really know why i picked it my first year... i was never like an Edgy Goth Kid or anything. they got 2nd place the first year and i thought that was awesome, and i had also gotten involved with a really fun DC chat group so i joined them again the next year. then they won and that was awesome!! other people in the chat group started joining other teams and there was no reason it needed to be a DC only group (it was called the 30 trillionaires... our “goal” every year was to collectively make it to 30 trillion goals during the season. which is impossible but idk that was what made it kind of fun i guess.. it was just casual yooyuball grinding and chatting with friends lol) so i wasn’t “stuck” with the team but even after they stopped doing so well i stuck with them out of loyalty. i used to be SUPER into the altador cup but i lost touch w/ the chat group and never got into it again
Day 12: Favourite Avatar?
ANOTHER HARD QUESTION!! i’ve always LOVED the bon appetite kelp one.. which i still don’t have. generally i prefer the “older” style of avatars where they were simpler, mostly animated but in a simple way and a lot of the time w/ pixel art elements. i feel like a lot of newer avatars have a way heavier focus on animation, like theyre just lil gifs, they lost a lot of that simplicity. i also tend to be biased toward avatars that have odd shapes rather than just being squares. like gloomy and jazzmosis and taelia. even the circle ones that still have regular borders are pleasing to me
Day 13: Which chat boards do you usually chat in?
i don’t use the boards much... i lurk newbie chat a lot and sometimes try to get involved and talk w/ people but i never keep it up. i was an avatar chat girl as a kid and that’s still the place i feel the most comfortable i guess.
Day 14: Are you in a guild?
nope! i LOOOOOVED guilds and 10 year old me would be so upset to find out that i’m not involved in the Guild Life anyway. imo it’d be really cool if guilds got a rehaul.
Day 15: Favourite Faerie?
mira is my girl.. i like the battle faerie a lot too but i can’t remember her name. 
Day 16: Do you have a gallery and does it have a theme?
i have one created but i don’t even know what’s in there, i don’t pay much attention to it. i think i just have a few plushies and petpets and random items i thought were cute or charming. i like the idea of one day having a guild with a cool theme.
Day 17: Do you use the Battledome?
not really. i have my dad’s old account now with a super super powerful battle pet (he was Famous in the BD and i think for a while his pet was one of the most powerful pets on the whole site) so i guess i should take advantage of that but i don’t
Day 18: Do you use the NC Mall?
nah... i use the free NC when i get it, usually. i think i have some accrued on a few different accounts that i just don’t use. it’s kind of a pain in the ass to worry about NC items in customizations on diff side accounts. 
Day 19: Favourite shop to shop at?
i rarely even look at neopets shops lol. when i was younger i really liked the faerieland petpet shop. that’s all i got for u
Day 20: Favourite game?
i feel obligated to say spinacles bc it’s my blog title but i don’t even like spinacles, i’m just good at it and there were a good few months when i got a good number of people who aren’t normally super into neopets obsessed w/ beating my score and it Amused me. i’m not even like a spinacles Master but i do know how to get gold Very easily. anyway uhhh i think let it slide is fun and i’m fairly good at it but i hate playing it for np because it feels like it takes forever and it gets boring. i feel the same way about assignment 51 which i also like the Aesthetic of a lot. i have a love/hate relationship with ultimate bullseye II
Day 21: How many items are currently in your Safety Deposit Box?
Items: 1,900 | Qty: 2,828
Day 22: Whats the most amount of Neopoints you’ve ever had at one time?
i hit 8mil recently and then spent some of it on a royal pb. i had planned on going for 10mil before spending any (so i can get that sweet bank account upgrade) but i got impatient. 
Day 23: Do you use the Stock Market?
occasionally. i don’t check it every day but i have a decent portfolio
Day 24: Favourite Daily (ex. Coltzan’s Shrine, Tombola, etc.)?
i kinda like the discarded blue grundo plushie or w/e in faerieland. i don’t know his whole stupid name but i remember when he was just a tiny pixel in faerieland that didn’t do anything, so it’s cute that he’s a daily now and gets visited by people more often. 
Day 25: Do you decorate your Neohome(s)?
not at all
Day 26: What is a Paint Brush colour TNT should release next?
honestly why dont they just make pet pb colors out of colors that are currently petpet exclusive? birthday and valentine? fuckin.. picnic might be harder to execute but it’s out there and it’s a fun one. 
Day 27: Favourite hero? Favourite Villian?
i’m not as educated about neopets lore as i’d like to be i think..... i like nabile, shes a hero right?? and i’ve always like balthazar. he’s a piece of shit. 
Day 28: Favourite plot or site event?
my biggest regret is not being more involved in plots as a kid :( i read the comics but didnt participate. i really liked the LDP comic and wish i’d been part of the actual puzzles and stuff. 
Day 29: Are there certain items you collect?
i kind of collect cute petpets, i love them and don’t usually get rid of them once i acquire them. same with cute plushies. also i like the poorly drawn items from the “artists day off” days, smelly jelly is one of my faves i think
Day 30: Why do you like Neopets?
there’s... so much to do!!!! like yeah the site is dying and jumpstart is digging its own grave and sooo many parts of the site are dead or broken or whatever but there’s still just, always a new goal to strive toward and a new thing to get into and i think that’s cool.
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