Tumgik
#brain scramblies
strang3lov3 · 11 months
Text
Brain Scramblies
Joel Miller x Fem! Reader
Summary: Bubbly and sweet Reader slips and falls at Tommy and Maria’s anniversary party, hitting her head hard on the floor. Tommy tasks Joel, her grumpy patrol partner, with getting her home safe. In her dazed state, she spills to Joel how she really feels about him! Basically two idiots dancing around their feelings for each other
Word count: 3.6k
Warnings: Talk of traumatic brain injuries, but that’s it. Brief mention of smut but mostly goofy fluff. Joel is afraid of feelings lol
A/N: I actually don't feel fantastic about this story, but felt like you all deserved something new from me to satisfy the absence. Next week I'll have a bit more time to continue my bd!joel story and a few others! yes, the title is from wwdits. my other favorite show lol
if you like this story, please leave me a comment 🩷
masterlist
Tumblr media
It’s a beautiful night, laughter and music fill the air of the Tipsy Bison bar in Jackson, Wyoming. It’s Tommy and Maria’s anniversary party and you were having a ball celebrating with the two of them. Tommy and Maria loved you, and you loved them. You often babysat their child, took care of chores around their home, and brought them baked goods and other treats. They loved you like you were their own. 
The party was a blast, you spent the night dancing and chatting with Tommy and Maria and others. It couldn’t have been a better night.
Until you trip over your own feet. .
Boom. In one swift motion, too quick for your brain to process, your legs kick up into the air and your back slams the ground, your head following suit. 
Your vision goes dark then, voices fading out. You feel a strong pair of hands grip your shoulders and jiggle your face slightly. You open your eyes slowly, blinking a few times, and the figure in front of you speaks. “Hey, now. Wake up, wake up, Jesus, girl. What did you do?” he asks, but his words sound muddled, like he’s underwater. “Maria, go get Joel. I think she might have a concussion.” he shouts in the opposite direction.
Your fuzzy vision focuses then and you recognize the friendly face and long black hair in front of you. It’s Tommy. You squint your eyes and look around, confused as to why you’re on the floor. The lights are blindingly bright and the music is blaring. It’s too much for your senses. 
“Can you hear me, honey? You took quite a tumble and it looked like you hit your head pretty hard. Drink too much?” 
You struggle to respond, finding it difficult to form words and coherent thoughts. You feel dazed and foggy and there’s a pounding throb at the back of your head. and “Think I tripped,” you finally mumble out, carefully prodding the back of your skull. 
“Wouldn’t be the first time, you klutz,” he chuckled, tilting your chin and looking into your eyes. “Maria’s getting Joel, I think we’re gonna have him take you home. Infirmary’s closed at this time of night but we can get you checked out tomorrow, make sure you didn’t thump your head too hard.”
Joel. Your eyes widened at the mention of him. Now that was something your brain had no issue focusing on. “Your older brother, Joel?” 
“Yes, Joel, my older brother,”
“I like Joel,”
“I know you do, honey,”
“I really like Joel,” you say through a long sigh. “Isn’t he just lovely?”
Tommy looks at you with an eyebrow cocked, completely amused by your honesty. Tommy and Maria had a feeling you were crushing on him, but you stayed tight lipped about your feelings for him. “Yeah, sure. Lovely describes Joel perfectly,”
Joel was your patrol partner. He was tall, handsome, brave, and skilled. He had the most gorgeous brown eyes you had ever seen, and the prettiest gentle curls atop his head. And he couldn’t fucking stand you. 
You didn’t often go on patrol, but everyone pitched in with patrol around Jackson. Being so near and dear to Tommy and Maria’s hearts, they wanted the best for you and always put you on patrol with Joel. He’d keep you safe, they told you. 
And he did keep you safe. But not without constant grumbling and griping about your sprightly attitude and constant chatter. He thought he had it rough with Ellie, but she was a walk in the park compared to you, with your sweet and pure heart and bubbly personality. 
“What’s your favorite kind of cookie?” you asked him once while traveling horseback through a grassy meadow. It was a beautiful day, the clouds were big and fluffy and tall. The wildflowers were blooming left and right, painting the grass with violet and crimson. You held onto Joel tightly, pressing your face against his back. He tried his best to ignore how much he enjoyed the feeling of your arms around his stomach. 
“You ask too many goddamn questions,” he grunted.
“That’s not an answer,” you scolded playfully. 
Joel stayed silent. You were like an annoying, buzzing bee. If he ignored you, hopefully you’d go away. Easy, he thought. Just ignore the annoying, cute, thoughtful, and beautiful bee. 
You asked him again. Maybe he didn’t hear you, you spoke into his right side after all. Still, nothing. “Joel?”
You could hear him inhale and exhale deeply. He was definitely ignoring you. That just wouldn’t do. 
So you pinched his side.
He yelped in surprise. “Ow! What the fuck is wrong with you?”
“I asked you a question,”
“I’m not answerin’,”
“That’s rude of you,”
“Yeah, well, tough,”
You pinched him again. 
“Gaah!” Joel swatted your hand, nearly losing his balance. “Jesus, fucking snickerdoodles!” he hissed at you. Oh, how you got under his skin. Snickerdoodles were, in fact, his favorite cookies. He wasn’t just saying that to shut you up. His grandmother used to make them for him and Tommy when they were young. His heart broke a little at the thought of her, thankful she had passed long before the world went to shit. “Happy now?”
Yes, you were happy. You rubbed soothing circles into where you pinched him. 
The next day, you whipped up a batch of the best snickerdoodles Joel would ever taste. You dropped them off on his doorstep and left, not alerting Joel or Ellie to what you had done.
Ellie was the one to find your cookies. “Joel, what’re these?” she called into their home, shoving a cookie into her mouth. Joel looked up, rolling his eyes when he recognized the treats in her hand. “Give me those,” he grumbled. 
He took one cookie and examined it, then brought it to his lips. He took a bite, and melted when he tasted the sweet cinnamon and sugar cookie, so buttery and slightly tangy, just how a snickerdoodle should be. It was soft and chewy, just how he liked them.
And dear lord, it was orgasmic. The best snickerdoodle he had ever tasted. He prayed his grandmother up in heaven would forgive him for enjoying it so much, but this was definitely his new favorite. How dare you weasel your way into his heart with baked goods? What a contemptible thing to do. He felt his heart swell at the thought of you and your sweetness. And it fucking terrified him.
Joel put on his boots and practically sprinted to Tommy and Maria’s. Without knocking, he let himself inside and sat down at the table with Tommy as he tried to catch his breath. Tommy looked at him with wide eyes, completely perplexed by his brother. “You have to–” he stopped for a second, breathing in and out deeply. “You have to take her off patrol with me. I ain’t gonna be her partner anymore.” Joel’s heaving began to slow.
“And why would I do that, Joel?”
“She talks too much,”
Tommy let out a dry laugh. Joel Miller, ever the grinch. Heart two sizes too small. “Are we eight years old? Suck it up, big brother,”
Joel shook his head, squinting his eyes and squeezing the bridge of his nose. “She fuckin’ pinched me,” Tommy opened his mouth to speak, but Joel interrupted. “Twice!”
Tommy smiled at the thought of sweet little you pinching Joel. “I’m sure she had a good reason for pinchin’ you. What’d you do to her?”
“I didn’t–it doesn’t matter,” Joel sighed exasperatedly. He had a penchant for the dramatics at times. “You don’t get it. She made me cookies.”
Tommy gasped sarcastically. “No, not cookies. How horrible, Joel! What should we do with her, throw her in jail? Banish her? Feed her to lions?”
“Tommy,” Joel warned with a low voice. “I am not doin’ patrol with her anymore.”
“Joel,” Tommy warned back, matching his tone. “Quit your bitchin���. She’s a nice girl, and you’re gonna take care of her. She likes you, why, I haven’t got a clue.”
Tommy knew the real reason Joel wanted to stop patrolling with you. He was catching feelings for you. And Joel reacted exactly how Tommy expected. He was frightened of these feelings, terrified to let anyone new into his heart. He already made room for Ellie and her bad puns, he didn’t know if he had room for you and your snickerdoodles as well. He did. You were already there. 
Joel and Maria appeared in front of you then, your eyes brightening when you met Joel’s sour expression. 
“What’d you do now, trouble?” 
Trouble. That was Joel’s nickname for you. When he and Ellie finished your cookies, he returned your container to you on your porch.
“Thanks for the cookies, trouble. They were delicious,” he said, his voice was low and gravelly. “Didn’t need to do all that for me.”
“Trouble? Is that what I am?” you asked incredulously.
“Yeah, actually. Pinchin’ me. Talkin’ too much,” Joel did his best to bite back the smile threatening to form on his lips. “And now you’re tryin’ to make me fat, so yeah. You’re a troublemaker.”
Your glassy eyes scanned his face. “What did you do now, trouble?”
Joel bent down to meet your gaze and Maria checked the back of your head for cuts or swelling. 
“Maria says you’re hurt. What’d you do?”
“I tripped and fell,” Joel scoffed. “Figures,” Joel pushed Tommy to the side, crouching in front of you. He took your face into his hands, checking for any other injuries. Your eyes were unfocused and pupils blown wide. He held a finger in front of your eyes, moving it from side to side. You had difficulty following the movement.
“Ouch,” you winced, feeling Maria’s fingers on the tender spot at the back of your head. “I think she smacked her head pretty hard.” she told Tommy. “Very swollen back here.”
“She’s not following my finger. Think it’s probably a concussion, but I don’t know for sure,” he said. “She seems pretty out of it.”
In your fuzzy state, you reached forward and held Joel’s face, mimicking how he did to you. “Handsome,” you murmured. 
Joel felt his face go hot at your compliment. You thumbed his cheeks, savoring the feeling of his prickly hairs on your fingertips. “Uhh,”
“You’re so handsome,” you repeated. Not even drinking a barrel of whiskey could have pried that out of you. You did a number on your poor brain. 
“That’s nice, sweetheart,” Joel turned his head to the side and coughed, trying to hide his embarrassment. He gripped your wrists and pulled your hands away from his face as you pouted. “Think she needs to go home.” “That’s right. You make sure she gets home safe,” Tommy said. 
Joel looked up with a furrowed brow. “Me? Why can’t you deal with her?” his words came out more bitter than he intended, like taking you home was the biggest inconvenience of his life.
“Hey,” you whined. How rude!
Joel apologized quickly. “I’m sorry. Didn’t mean it like that,”
“Because it’s our anniversary, and I told you to keep her safe. Remember? Come on now, Joel. Be a gentleman,” Tommy motioned to Maria to help you up. Slowly, you stood up. On shaky legs, you felt your knees begin to give out. Joel lunged forward to catch your fall. 
He rolled his eyes with a sigh. Joel held out his arm for you and you wrapped your hands around his bicep. “Can you walk for me, trouble?” He didn’t actually mind leaving the party early. He wasn’t having too much fun anyway.
“I’ll do anything for you, Joel,” you erupted into a fit of giggles. “You’re so strong!” 
Joel felt his face go warm again as he cleared his throat. Wow, you really did hit your head hard. Joel was used to being flirted with, but this was an entirely different animal. You hit your head so hard it knocked your filter loose. What would you say next?
 His eyes darted to Tommy and Maria, who stood there watching you both, smirking. “Take good care of our girl,” Maria ordered.
Joel begins walking slowly, taking careful steps. You stumble along and can hardly maintain your footing as you make your way out of the bar. You’re still giggling and squeezing his arm. “You are so strong and so handsome!” you squeal.
“Jesus,” he whispered to himself. Was this real you or concussed you speaking?
You walked silently for a bit, gaining a slow and steady rhythm. The world around you blurred and moved quickly. 
“I have a crush on you,” you blurt out with slurred speech.
“That’s nice, trouble,” Joel said, not believing you. You might as well be completely wasted, the way you were making no sense. 
“I mean it,”
“I’m sure you do,” Joel replied sardonically. You tripped again, nearly falling over a second time. Joel caught you and held you tightly. Frustrated, he groaned.“Alright, no more talking. We’re playing the quiet game the rest of the way home,”
“Seriously,” you giggle. “You’re so fucking handsome. You’re the most handsomest man I’ve ever met,” You kept walking and stumbling awkwardly. It was as if you weren’t even walking, just floating along. Your legs didn’t feel real.
“Thank you,” Joel mumbles. He was never good at accepting compliments. But you seem so insistent on informing him of his good looks, he might as well take the compliments in stride.
“You have such pretty brown eyes. Did you know that?”
“I did not,”
“You do. And you have pretty hair,” you paused for a second, catching your breath. “And you have a nice butt,” Joel rolls his eyes, biting back his smile. “I want to have sex with you.” 
“Woah,” he barks at you, unable to contain his shock at your sudden boldness. Where is your fucking filter? Is this even real? Joel will be thinking of this night for weeks to come. “You have brain damage,” he tells you. “Need to stop talking like this,”
“You have brain damage!” You giggle, your feet crossing with Joel’s. Bam. It’s his turn to hit the ground now. You couldn’t walk in a straight line to save your life, even with Joel supporting you. “Oh, shoot. I tripped you.”
“Okay, that’s it,” Joel stands up and without asking permission, he lifts your body over his shoulder. He tries to ignore the fact that your ass is so close to his face. You erupt into laughter, absolutely tickled by his actions. “I know this probably isn’t great for your head, but we need to move. Almost home anyway,” 
“Fine by me, handsome!” you poke his back and his sides. He’s trying to fight off the tingles your touch leaves on his skin. “Are you gonna take me home and have sex with me?”
“Behave,” he warns you. “No, I am not having sex with you. I’m puttin’ you to bed and going to try to forget any of this ever happened. Now quiet, you.”
You let out an angry groan, but oblige. You’re running out of steam, fogginess filling your head even more. You can hardly keep your eyes open. 
Before you know it, Joel is at your doorstep and sets you down. “Where are your keys?” he asks you. 
You slap your thigh, indicating that your keys are in the front right pocket of your jeans. Joel pulls you close and quickly pulls the keys out of your jeans, looking up into the sky to avoid your gaze. He’d need to drink an ocean of alcohol to forget this night. 
Joel fumbles with the keys, trying each one and jiggling it in your door. He figured asking you which key was futile, you were so far gone.
As he’s working diligently to open your door, you can’t help but sigh in admiration. His back muscles tense through his shirt, the fabric stretching and moving back. And god, his ass. So round and plump in his tight jeans. You can’t help yourself. It needs to be pinched. “You really do have a nice butt,” you whisper.
You reach forward and pinch his ass with your thumb and pointer finger. Joel jumps and whips around. “What is wrong with you?” He looks at you with a furrowed brow, but his frustrated heart softens when he sees your expression. You’re smirking, eyes big and without a single thought behind them. You have no idea what you’re doing. He knows that. The real you would probably die of embarrassment if she knew of your flirty and bold antics tonight. He can’t help the smile curling up on his lips. You have to mean all of it, right?. All the compliments and confessions. He knows they’re all true. At least, he hopes they are.
Joel grabs your hand and helps you inside. He leads you through your house, checking each door to find your room. He could ask you, but he really doesn’t want you talking. You need to relax.
Once he finds your room, he turns on the light, leads you inside, and helps you sit your bed. Your room reflects your personality perfectly, so bright and colorful. Decorations everywhere. 
Then, he leaves. 
You feel like crying. Your head feels so murky and full, and the pounding has worsened. “Joel?” your voice is thick. 
No answer. He just left without saying goodbye?
Your bottom lip wobbles and you feel tears well up in your eyes as your heart begins to break. How did you even end up here? What even happened tonight? All you knew is that you felt cold and sick and all alone. Your head feels like it’s going to fall right off. 
You sniffle and hear a thump in the distance. And then another. And another. They’re getting louder now. Footsteps. 
Joel returns and your heart blooms. He always kept you safe, even when you drove him fucking nuts. Of course he wouldn’t just leave you. You see that he has a glass of water in his hand. 
He sits on the bed and faces you. You smile gently, admiring all of his features. His scars, his freckles. His sparkly brown eyes. His salt and pepper mustache. “You didn’t leave?”
“‘Course not,” he grips the back of your head softly and tilts it back, then presses the glass to your lips. “Gotta make sure you’re safe, right?” He doesn’t let you respond to his question and tilts the glass into your mouth, forcing you to take a little sip of water. 
“You take such good care of me, Joelie,” His cheeks turn rosy at his new nickname. How sweet it sounds from your lips. He presses the glass to your lips again and makes you drink. 
“You’re so handsome,” Sip. “Did you know I have a crush on you?” sip.
“I did, actually,” Sip. “Now drink. You need to finish the glass.”
Sip. “You have such gorgeous brown eyes. Like coffee beans,” you whisper. Sip.
“Is that right? Coffee beans?” Well, that’s a thoughtful compliment. He doesn’t bother hiding his smile anymore. 
“Mhm,” Sip. “And your butt–”
“What about my butt?” he teases you with a raised eyebrow. You won’t remember any of this anyway, he might as well play along. 
“Like a peach,” “A peach, huh?” He presses the glass to your lips again, this time not pulling it away. You drink the rest of the water. 
“What about a peach, Joelie?” you question. Your eyes are big and lost. It’s as if the last thirty seconds didn’t happen. 
Your forgetfulness would have worried Joel, but he was no stranger to concussions. Had a few of his own. His daughter, Sarah, also had sustained a few concussions from flying soccer balls. She’d be like this too, acting goofy and speaking incoherently. She was always back to normal within a day or two. You would be okay too. 
“Nothin’, sweetheart,” Joel lifts your legs onto the bed and takes off your shoes, plopping each on the ground. He pulls a knitted blanket over your body and gently leans your head back into your pillows.
You stare into his eyes, his gorgeous coffee bean eyes, let out a big yawn. Your eyes are heavy now and your head feels like a weight, like you couldn’t lift it even if you tried. Joel stares back at you, the gears in his head are spinning. He places an experimental hand on your head and combs his fingers over your scalp.
He continues stroking your scalp, soothing you. Your eyes fall shut, and within seconds you’re in a peaceful slumber. 
He doesn’t leave. He stays with you for another minute, making sure you’re really asleep. 
He still doesn’t leave. One more minute passes. 
He’s still sitting there, stroking your head. He can’t bring himself to leave you. He needs to make sure you’re safe, just like Tommy and Maria told him to. 
He’ll stay here all night, gently stroking your head and your back. Telling himself he’s just making sure you’re safe, that’s all. “Goodnight, trouble,” he whispers. 
He’ll deal with his feelings later.
Part two: troublemaker
Tumblr media
@swiftispunk @rosaliedepp @pedrotonin @kittenlittle24 @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @brittmb115 @bigboiseason123 @laysmt @venusdemonroe @guiltgoldglory @aubreysylvain @leeeesahhh @oliveg95 @ifall4dilfs @alloftheboysivelovedbefore @harriedandharassed @vickie5546 @louisxosblog @southernbe @ravenouswild @luvrking @r02eg0ld @amythenortherner @walkintheprk @zpandaqueen @silkiers @angel-with-a-heart @kdogreads @boofy1998 @theoremrobin @ihatespoilers @2valentines @happy--birthday--kiddo @elissaaa @paleidiot @brie-annwyl @str84pedro @sesigsss @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @palomaluvsdilfs @kyloispunk @tiredbuthappy @yuk-for-president @jazzy-music-cat
4K notes · View notes
sonnybonowig · 25 days
Text
Tumblr media
New pic from cary
92 notes · View notes
pretend-erin · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
🌀🧩IT’S MANDY MONDAY🧩🌀
.
.
.
Finally cosplayed Amanda over on my tiktok!!! (Mx.Velvita) - Reverse Bear Trap built by @fennecphoebe
50 notes · View notes
raindropwindow · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
fools literal FOOLS
689 notes · View notes
thewitchofstjohns · 1 year
Text
Happy Superb Owl Day!! Enjoy your parties but don't get the brain scramblies 🦉🦉🦉🏈🏈🏈
Tumblr media
182 notes · View notes
m0tleycoll3ctive · 10 months
Text
Didnt think id ever make my own post but it is 1 am and my brain is doing things to me
My partner talks about Laszlo crying alot, but I’m imagining Sean crying. Something happens, maybe he gets into a fight with his wife or something, and he’s in tears. Im imagining it at the party before the hypnotism. Once she left he would smile and apologize to Laszlo, “Man, I’m really sorry, we haven’t fought like that in ages, made me look like an asshole. You need anything?” Acting fine with tears down his face. And since he’s going to make sean forget later anyways, he hugs him and comforts him. This is probably super stupid because im half asleep but i am UNWELL over them.
15 notes · View notes
enby-witch · 2 years
Text
Tumblr media
reading the May 12 letter and thinking about this
118 notes · View notes
keen4sheen · 2 years
Text
the whole “Guillermo loses his mind trying to help Nandor plan the perfect vampire wedding” is really silly and sounds like a grand old pine time until you remember how many times brain scramblies is a plot point in this show. 
i don’t like it i don’t like it i don’t like i don’t -
29 notes · View notes
cleopatrachampagne · 2 years
Text
am rewatching “brain scramblies” (one of the best episodes of wwdits, if not all of television) and i can’t stop thinking about the first time i showed it to my mom and was laughing really hard and she glared at at me and angrily whispered, “your dad is right in the other room. don’t be rude.”
while it’s absolutely true that she took a nice chap from the streets, made him her husband and now he’s a useless boiled potato i’m pretty sure i’m not the one who just brought him into this.
17 notes · View notes
strang3lov3 · 10 months
Text
Troublemaker (Brain Scramblies 2)
Joel Miller x Fem! Reader
Summary: Joel is bad at feelings and distances himself from you after your concussion, and faces his feelings on patrol with you.
Warnings: Smut smut smut of all varieties, so like oral m and f receiving, PIV. Ya know the drill!!! 18+ MDNI! Joel is bad at feelings. Kind of slow burn, asshole Joel. Very sweet sex! Age gap oops
Word Count: 4.9k
A/N: SURPRISE MOTHAFUCKAS!!!! BRAIN SCRAMBLIES 2 AT 10PM ON WEDNESDAY NIGHT!! My bf recently informed me you’re not supposed to sleep when you have a concussion so my bad guys sorry for giving you all brain damage that's on me ALSO THANKS FOR ALL THE LOVE ON BRAIN SCRAMBLIES! Here’s part two for all who asked!! Like brain scramblies, I don't love this but there was an overwhelming demand for part two and I was concerned for y'alls sanity. Also I changed the title again oops.
Read the first story here! It can be read as a standalone but I highly recommend reading Brain Scramblies first!
Please please please comment and reblog if you enjoy!
Tumblr media
Joel ended up falling asleep with you. He woke up early and quietly excused himself from your bed. God, how pretty you looked sound asleep. With your puffy lips and quiet snoring. The way your hair fell across your face. He pushed your hair away from your eyes and left. 
Stupid. So fucking stupid. 
You didn’t mean any of it, any of what happened last night. Joel was a fool for indulging in your concussed words and letting himself believe any of it was real. He placed too much meaning on last night. 
He’d need to work hard to erase the way you made him feel. He needs to forget how he loved taking care of you, how he wants to be the one to make you feel better after a long day or when you’re sick. How he wants to spend all of his time making you smile. He needs to erase all of his love and adoration for you. 
In the morning, Tommy took you to the doctor. Your head was still sore and pounding slightly, but the doctor assured you that with a week’s worth of rest, you’d be back to normal. Honestly, you’d be better in a day or two but it’s best to take it easy for a while longer, just in case. 
You were in the waiting room while the doctor prepared some medicine for you. Some tea to help with the headaches and nausea, and some pain meds. Tommy was sitting right next to you. 
“Feelin’ alright, honey?” he asked you. 
“Yeah, I’m okay. Hurting a little but I’ll be fine,” you replied. Your head was still tender, and likely would be for a while. 
“Up for dinner on Friday? As long as you’re feeling okay, of course,”
“Yeah, yeah. Only if Maria is cooking, of course,” you teased him. Tommy wasn’t a great cook, unfortunately. 
Tommy chuckled. “Well, that’s a given. Joel will be there too. You remember him taking you home last night?”
You shook your head. “I thought you and Maria took me home. It was Joel?” Your memories were fuzzier than you realized. 
Tommy’s lips curled in a sly smirk. “Yeah, no. It was Joel. You don’t remember anything you said to him?” You shook your head again. “Well, you were flirtin’ pretty hardcore.”
Your cheeks burned and flushed. “No,” you groaned, burying your face in your palms. 
“Oh, yes. Called him handsome left and right. Never seen him so bashful before. He was pink as a flamingo, honey,” he said. “Course, that was only at the bar. He didn’t tell me if you said anything else about your little crush when he took you home.”
“No, no. You’re lying, Tommy,” you whined. This cannot be fucking happening. What did you do? 
Tommy shook his head. “It’s the truth, I’m afraid,”
You were embarrassed. Actually, you were way past embarrassed. Mortified. Humiliated. 
Tommy could see what you were thinking, the excuses you were making up in your head. “Don’t you think about canceling dinner, now. Maria’s making your favorite pot roast, with all those carrots and potatoes,”
Your eyes were pleading with his, his own twinkling with amusement. You opened your mouth to speak, but the doctor interrupted. 
“Alright, now. Tea is for the nausea and headaches, it can be a little bitter so I’d suggest adding some honey. These pain meds will help with the throbbing,” he said. He instructed Tommy to keep an eye on you, make sure you’re hanging in there. 
You both thanked the doctor and left the infirmary then. Tommy relented his teasing, seeing as how you were so close to combusting in embarrassment. 
The week passes slowly. It’s boring, so fucking boring. You do puzzles, read your favorite books, work on your blanket you’ve been knitting. Sip your tea. And each day, all you can think about is Joel. What you said to him, what you don’t know you said to him. 
It’s Friday. Tonight’s the night you’ve been dreading all week. As you make your way to Tommy and Maria’s home, you go over your plan in your head. Just be polite, like always. Apologize to Joel and make nice. Then go home, and the next time you’re on patrol with Joel it will all be back to normal. Right?
No. Not right. 
“Hi,” you say to Joel. Tommy’s setting the table, Maria is putting the finishing touches on her meal. 
Joel only grunts in response, never once meeting your eyes. You might as well have said hi to a brick wall or a houseplant. 
“How’s your week been?” 
“Fine,” he grumbles. “Your head, uh, feelin’ any better?” He speaks like he’s in pain, like each word stings and aches as it rolls off of his tongue. 
“Yeah. It’s better, mostly. Tommy said you walked me home, and I guess–”
Joel cut you off. “Dinner’s ready,” 
Wow. So it’s like that. 
You sit next to Joel at the table, who never once speaks to you the entire meal, save for a “Pass the potatoes, please,” or “I need the gravy,” here and there. You’d never experienced such an awkward dinner before. And Joel was never your biggest fan, but he had never been so rude and short with you before. You felt it was a little undeserved, given you had no control over the situation last week.
Luckily, Tommy and Maria fill the air with conversation to make up for Joel’s shitty and impersonal attitude. Within a few hours, dinner is over. Tommy begins clearing the table as you and Joel get dressed to leave. You bid all of them goodbye, and then leave. Dinner didn’t go the way you planned, but nothing ever does. At least it was finally over. 
“Walk her home, Joel,” Maria says sternly, watching you through the window. “Come on. It’s the least you can do after icing her out all evening.” “She’s fine. Concussion healed.”
“Don’t care, brother,” Tommy interjects. “Walk her home, or you’re cleaning the stables for the next six months. Go. Think y’all have some stuff to talk about, anyway.”
“This is ridiculous,” Joel mumbles as Tommy and Maria both hug him goodbye. But he does it anyway.
He meets you a little ways away from their home, the crunch of leaves under his footsteps startling you. “Let’s move. I’m walkin’ you home again,” he says. 
“Oh, that’s nice of you,” you reply, surprised. No doubt Tommy and Maria forced him into this. 
Joel says nothing. He’s silent the entire walk home, silent as he leaves you on your porch. 
You’re in disbelief. You were expecting to maybe laugh a bit over the situation last week, but not this. Who knew Joel hated being flirted with so much? He takes quick steps, never once looking back to make sure you make it inside your home okay. 
Fuck it.
“Joel,” you call out. “Come here.”
Joel turns around, eyeing you with a frown. “What do you want now? You’re home.” 
“Come here.” your voice is stern and demanding.
He rolls his eyes and shakes his head, true to dramatic Joel fashion. When he steps up onto your porch and stands in front of you, he stares at you with a blank expression, his eyes are cold. “What,” he says flatly. No trouble at the end of his sentence, like he usually calls you. It stings.
“What happened last week? When you walked me home, after my concussion.”
“Nothin’. Nothin’ happened,” 
“Are you sure? Because Tommy said I was flirting with you at the bar, and I don’t know if I said something rude or what but I…” you trail off. “I don’t know. I just want to know what happened.”
Joel sighs deeply, pinching the bridge of his nose. “You didn’t say anything rude,” 
“Then what? What did I say?”
“It doesn’t matter,” 
“Then tell me,” 
“I said it doesn’t matter,” 
“It matters to me,”
Joel steps away from you, sitting on one of your chairs. He won’t look at your face. “Fine,” he says gruffly. “You called me handsome.” 
“Tommy told me,” you say quietly, your voice is small. “Listen-”
“About a million times, actually. It’s all you could say for a minute there,” His tone is beginning to soften, but he’s still grumpy and bothered. “Gave me a nickname, too.” “I did?” 
“You did,” 
“What was it?” you step closer to him, taking a seat in the chair next to where he’s sitting.
“Joelie,” he says. “You called me Joelie.” 
“Joelie, huh?” you mumble, half to Joel, half to yourself. “Was that all?”
Joel is looking off into the distance, the cool air is biting at his ears and nose. “No, there was a little more,”
“Are you gonna tell me?”
“No, I don’t think so. No reason to,” he pauses for a second, remembering. “I’ve got a fuckin’ bone to pick with you, though.”
“Clearly,” you reply with a sarcastic tone. “What’d I do, other than call you handsome?”
“You fuckin’ pinched me. Again,” he turns to face you. “You have a real problem keepin’ your hands to yourself, you know that?” he scolds you angrily.
You can’t help the giggle that escapes your lips. “You probably deserved it! You always do, you’re such a dick,” 
Joel scoffs, it’s almost a chuckle. “Maybe. I wasn’t actin’ like a dick that night, though. Not enough to warrant you pinchin’ me,”
You’re puzzled. Why else would you pinch Joel, if not as a punishment for acting like an asshole? “Then why did I pinch you?”
Joel turns red then. Like, really blushes. His ears and cheeks are bright and rosy. He’s flamingo pink, just like Tommy said. 
“Why, Joel?”
“You said I have an ass like a uh…a peach,” he whispers. “And then you–”
It’s your turn to blush now. “No,” you interrupt. “I didn’t. Joel, tell me I didn’t pinch your ass.”
He nods, silently. 
“I am so fucking sorry, Joel,” you apologize frantically. You were a fucking menace!! “Please. That was so inappropriate.”
“It’s fine, trouble. Was kinda cute, actually. You said I have eyes like coffee beans too. Never heard that one before,”
Trouble. 
“And that’s all?”
“You said you’ve got this great, big, humongous, gigantic crush on me,” he says through a sigh, his tone is defeated. Sarcastic, even. “That was really it, though.”
He doesn’t mention all the times you asked him to fuck you. He’s not a sadist, you’re embarrassed enough already. In fact, you’re so embarrassed and in your own head that you don’t even pick up on the sadness in his voice. 
You open your mouth to apologize, to explain. Joel speaks first. 
“Don’t worry about it. I know you didn’t mean any of it,”
And then he sits up, making his way to step down off of your porch. He turns to you one more time before leaving, you can’t place his expression. He looks almost sullen, almost heartbroken. 
“Goodnight, trouble.” 
He leaves. Once again, you weaseled your way too close to his heart.
And that’s the last you really speak to Joel.
You’re not on patrol with Joel very often, but he’s even quieter when you are paired up. Not in the rude kind of way like at dinner, but in a sheepish sort of way. Like he’s embarrassed, or sad, or feels nervous to speak to you. The confident, cocky Joel is long gone. He rejects all of your attempts at conversation, and it leaves you heartbroken and baffled. 
If only he knew how you felt about him. If only he’d let you speak. 
✧・゚: *✧・゚:* *:・゚✧*:・゚✧
It’s a chilly and rainy fall day, you and Joel are holed up in an old home on patrol together. It’s been maybe a month, a month and a half since that night on your porch.
He’s not really speaking to you, except to give you instructions here and there. You’re getting sick of his attitude. So standoffish and cold.
You wonder what went wrong that night. He was never all that friendly with you, but he was never like this. He looked right past you, like you were a phantom. Not really there.
You’re knitting your blanket, sitting on a window seat. The rain is pitter pattering against the glass. Joel is stoking the flames in the fireplace. The only sounds are the clicks of your knitting needles and the crackle of the fire. There’s a tupperware of snickerdoodles you brought for him, sitting untouched. It was your olive branch. He didn’t even thank you for them.
“What do you think of my blanket?” You hold the blanket up for him, various shades of green yarn arranged in a rippling pattern. 
Joel takes a quick glance, barely even looking, then grumbles something. 
“Joel? I didn’t hear you,”
“I said it’s fine,” he snaps at you.
You sigh, knitting your blanket furiously. What a fucking dick. “You know what? You don’t have to be such a fucking asshole all the time, you know that?”
“Fuck are you talkin’ about?”
“I said that you don’t have to be an asshole all the time,” you spit.
“I’m not–”
“You are. And I don’t even know why!” you laugh wryly. “All you do is fucking ignore me. And I don’t get it, Joel. I don’t know why I even try with you.”
Joel tries to speak, but you don’t let him. 
“I get it, okay? I made you uncomfortable when I called you handsome and pinched your ass and everything that night. I’m sorry,”
Joel is still stoking the fire, giving you no attention.
“I’m serious. I had a fucking brain injury, I had no control over my actions or my words. And I’m sorry,”
Joel’s not listening to your words. He’s so in his own head, he’s not absorbing any of it. All he hears you say is “I didn’t mean anything I said, I don’t feel anything towards you,” Rub it in some more, why don’t you? I’m not in love with you and I don’t think you have nice eyes like I said.
“I do have a little crush on you, okay? You do have nice eyes and a nice nose, and you’re the most handsome man I’ve met in my life. But it doesn’t give you the right to act like this,” you snapped. “I know it made you uncomfortable because I’m too young for you or whatever, so I want you to know I am sorry. Genuinely. Can you please drop the dickhead act now?”
Joel freezes, thrown off.
“Joel,” you demand. 
“Say that again,” he says. He’s looking at you finally.
“I’m sorry,” 
“No, not that,” he waves his hand. “About my nose.”
“I like your nose,”
Joel never liked his nose. But you do. The strong shape, the freckles and scars. It fits him perfectly. “You mean that?”
“Of course. Why else would I say it?” you say bitterly. God, he is so far up his own ass you wonder if he even knows what the sun looks like.
“Why?” he asks you, a smile is threatening to curl his lips upward. 
“The shape, I don’t know. Your freckles,” you say through a sigh. “That’s what you’re getting from this? Can you please just let me apologize for harassing you?”
“No,” he responds. “Tell me more. About my eyes, again.” Joel stands up now, looking at you from a few feet away.
You shake your head. Haven’t you embarrassed yourself enough for him? “Why? Thought I told you they look like coffee beans,”
“Humor me,” he says, his voice low, stepping toward you now. Your heartbeat picks up its pace as he considers his next move. He sits next to you at the window seat. He’s so in love, melting into a puddle before you. God, the way you’ve ruined him.  
“You have nice eyes. Dark and deep. I like the way they shine amber in the sun,” you whisper. You can’t help the growing smile on your face, the same smile when you’re alone and thinking of Joel’s handsome face. “Happy now, asshole?”
There’s a silent moment between you both after you speak, Joel’s looking at you in a way he never has before. The butterflies in your tummy flutter a little faster now, his eyes darting back and forth between your own and your lips. 
“Joel,” you sigh, “Quit looking at me like that.” Your words are more desperate than you intend them to be. You wanted to sound more stern, like him. 
He doesn’t say anything as he carefully places his hand on your cheek, his thumb swiping back and forth against your skin. Your eyes flutter shut. 
He takes the opportunity to pull you close, his lips just millimeters away from yours. “I’m sorry,” he whispers to you. “I wasn’t bein’ fair to ya. You said all those things to me when you weren’t in your right mind,” he trails off, bowing his head. “I’m no good at this.”
“Try me,” you whisper back, your eyes still closed. 
“I don’t know, trouble,”
You pull back, looking into his eyes. They’re big and full of adoration and insecurity, a brutal combination. “Thought it wasn’t real?”
Joel can only nod. The man who always has something to say, suddenly choking on his words. His hand is still on your cheek, holding you steady. 
You want to kiss him, so badly. You want to kiss him with every fiber in your being. But you fight it. He’s going to be the one to kiss you, it’s going to be how you always pictured it. This, you’re certain of. 
Joel’s eyes are frantic and unsure. 
It feels like minutes. 
Hours. 
Days. 
An eternity before he finally does it. And then finally, he kisses you, slowly and gently. It takes you by surprise, sweeps you off your feet. His lips are soft and slightly chapped, he tastes so distinctly Joel. You sigh and moan against his lips as his tongue mingles with your own, you curse yourself for the desperation you exhibit. As if he cares. 
You kiss like that for a while, softly. His gentle and loving kisses are a stark contrast to his gruff and domineering personality on patrol. He’s dissolving under your lips, feeling love he’s not felt in a very long time. Everything he can’t say with his voice he says with his kisses. 
You break the kiss, trailing your lips down his jaw, the scratchy hairs of his beard feel amazing on your skin. You kiss down his neck, something you’ve fantasized about thousands of times. 
“Wait,” he rasps out. 
You pull away, noticing the tent in his jeans. “Want me to stop?”
“Yes,” he breathes. Your eyebrows raise and your head tilts slightly. “No. Not like that. I just, I want to do this right. Treat you right.”
“Joel?”
“Yeah?”
“Shut up,” you speak into his neck. “Need you to fuck me.”
He lets out a breathy chuckle as you continue kissing his skin, trailing back up his thick neck and nibbling at his ear. He’s panting and moaning beneath you, you never expected he’d fall apart like this. “You know,” he starts, “You told me you wanted me to fuck you when you had your concussion.” Your face grows red and you stop kissing him for a second. “Did not,”
“Did too,”
You ignore him and pretend like he didn’t just tell you that. You kiss his skin, it’s hot and slightly salty. You feel his pulse under your lips and then, you pull away. 
His brows furrow as you smile. He’s so fucking cute like this, way cuter than any fifty-something man should be. “Your turn. Tell me what you think of me, then we can continue,” 
Joel’s confidence is back and fully fledged now, it’s a welcome return. “I think you’re nothin’ but trouble. Honestly and truly,” 
“Yeah?”
“S’right. Makin’ me fat with your damn cookies. Makin’ me crazy with all your pinches. And you’ve got me fallin’ in love now. You’re a goddamn troublemaker, and I’ve known it since the day I met you,” 
It’s everything you ever wanted to hear Joel say. He’s falling for you.
He continues, “And when we get back, I get a redo. Doin’ this the right way with you, baby. Gonna make you dinner and all that. Like a gentleman,”
“You better,” you mumble, kissing him again. Your hands find their way to his jeans, fumbling with his belt. His cock grows harder beneath you, he swats your hands away and helps you free it, his member springing up between you both. 
You kneel in front of him, wrapping your fingers around the base of his cock. You lick a long stripe from the bottom all the way to the top of his dick, swirling your tongue around the blushed tip. “Troublemaker,” he sighs. “Don’t tease me now, sweetheart. Please, baby.” His eyes are screwed shut, face contorted in pleasure.
You love the way he calls you baby. And troublemaker. And sweetheart. You’ll be his baby and his sweetheart and his troublemaker for the rest of your life. 
You take him into your mouth, tongue paining his cock with swirls of saliva. His cock parts your lips, you love the smoothness of his skin. He tastes like skin and slightly salty, you hum against him as he bucks into your mouth. “Fuck, baby,”
You bob your head up and down, making a sloppy mess of saliva all over his lap. He pulls you off, suddenly. 
“My turn,” is all he grumbles when he picks you up and drags you to the couch in front of the fireplace. He makes short work of discarding your clothes, unbuttoning your jeans and your jacket and shirt. You’re naked in front of him, suddenly feeling vulnerable. You cover your breasts and bring your knees to your chest.
He notices and promptly begins removing his own clothing. “I know, I know,” he soothes you. “Evening out the playing field and all. Don’t hide from me now, I’m gonna make it right. You’re fucking beautiful, baby.” 
He’s naked now, kneeling in front of you and spreading your thighs apart. Your pussy is wet and glistening for him, you feel his hot breath on your center. He looks at you with wide eyes, his silent way of asking permission. You answer him clearly by carding your fingertips through his scalp, tugging on his head to where you need him most. You thrust your hips towards him, begging him with your body. 
“Eager, are we?” he mumbles. “Been dreamin’ of eatin this pussy, baby.” 
“Please,” you beg him. 
“Since you asked so nicely, trouble,” 
He doesn’t tease you, doesn’t spend any time kissing and biting your thighs. He dives right in, his tongue exploring your most intimate parts. It trails up your lips, through your folds. His tongue dips in your wet hole, tasting your slick. You jolt and gasp his name at the feeling. Your thighs clamp around his head, his scratchy beard is abrasive against your flesh. You welcome the feeling. 
He parts your thighs again then, a little rougher than the first time. His tongue slides through your wetness once more, then finds home at your clit, swollen and needy. He flicks upward, alternating between long and languid licks and short and quick kitten licks. One of his hands meet your center, his middle two fingers enter your pussy and punch upward until he finds the spot that makes you tick. He hasn’t touched a woman in a long time, but still remembers all the best ways to make her see stars. 
“Fuck, like that,” you gasp out. “Fuck, don’t stop.”
Joel says nothing as he eats your pussy, sucking and licking at your center. It’s not long before you’re coming undone on his tongue, your slickness making a mess of his face. Your moans are breathy and quick, he savors each one. His eyes are wide and dark with lust.
Barely recovered from your high, you grasp and paw at his shoulders, encouraging him to come up and meet you for another kiss. You taste yourself on his lips.
“Need you now, Joelie,” you breathe, breaking the kiss. 
His nickname still sounds just as sweet as the first time you whispered it, all those nights ago. 
“‘Course, trouble. I’ve got you.” he says against your skin, his tongue darting out to play with your nipples. He’s dragging the tip of his cock through your folds. “How do you want me?”
“Just like this, please. Just fuck me,”
Your wish is his command. He slides the tip into you slowly at first, making sure it’s not too much. It’s not, of course
He pushes into you all the way, you sigh in pleasure at the fullness. He fits inside you perfectly, like he was made for you. His tip presses at that sweet spot inside you with each thrust, almost effortlessly. 
“Fuck, sweetheart,” he moans. 
“Yeah, Joelie. Just like that, baby. Don’t stop,” 
He fucks you like that, not too hard and not too soft. A deliciously and devastatingly pleasant pace, with such care and love. 
And then the lightbulb goes off in your head. His butt!! 
How you wish you remembered pinching his ass that night. 
“Joel?” your voice is clear, not moaning or breathy. 
He stills inside you, taking heaving breaths on top of you, like it’s taking everything he’s got not to keep going. He looks at you with concern, afraid that he might have hurt you. “Everything okay? What do you need?” 
“Can I squeeze your butt?” 
Joel says nothing, just looks at you with a puzzled expression. He furrows his brows and squints at you before rolling his eyes.
Hey, at least you’re asking permission this time. 
“Please?”
“Yeah, dummy. It’s all yours, now. Don’t wear it out,” he grumbles, but you hear the playfulness in his tone. 
You giggle, reaching down to grasp a handful of his ass. It’s round, plump and fleshy. You dig your nails in slightly, pinching him a little. He winces slightly, shaking his head at your mischievous expression. Your eyes are bright and silly with your bottom lip pinned under your teeth in a grin.
“Hey now, trouble” he scolds you with a smile. “Behave.”
He kisses you, continuing his motions. His thrusts are so fluid and confident, you’re getting closer now, so is he. 
“Fuck, baby,” he pants. “Can’t hold off much longer. What do you need?”
You pull one of his hands from above your head and place it at your center. “Circles, please,” 
He adjusts his grip on the arm of the couch and moves his fingers to your clit, slick with your wetness and his spit from before. “You got it,”
His thrusts become sloppier, he’s letting out strangled gasps and groans. You’re moaning, crying his name as your orgasm begins to bloom inside of you. It’s intense and hot, it feels like sparks through your blood. 
“Joel, Joel,” is all you can say. He fucks you through your orgasm, chasing his own. “Fuck, Joelie.”
“I know, I know. I’m right there. Hang on for me baby, doin’ so good,” 
With a few more shuttering thrusts he’s spilling inside of you, painting your insides with his hot come. You feel every pulse and twitch of his cock, and he slumps on top of you. His skin is hot and sweaty, you don’t mind. You’ve been dreaming of his body pinning your own down for ages. 
You stay like that, just catching your breath together. He kisses your neck as your fingertips trail up and down his back. “I love you so much, Joel,” you whisper. “I really do.”
“Love you too, sweet girl,” he says softly. You love the way his voice sounds here, soft and gentle. All for you and no one else. 
He pulls out of you then, you whine at the loss. He lunges off the couch to reach for the tupperware container of snickerdoodles you baked for him.  
He pulls off the lid, grabbing a handful of cookies and shoving one in his mouth. Apparently Joel was still a typical man, snacking after sex. 
You giggle, grab a cookie of your own and kiss his cheek. He wraps an arm around you and pulls you close to watch the flames in the fireplace dance. 
“God, you’re evil,” he says, his voice muffled by the cookies in his mouth. “Force feedin’ me cookies and makin’ me fat.”
“Busted. You got me,” you say, smiling. “Gotta keep your ass nice and squeezable, hm? It was my devious plan all along. You figured it out, Sherlock.”
“Shut up. Fuckin’ troublemaker,”
tags:
@swiftispunk @rosaliedepp @pedrotonin @kittenlittle24 @walkingintheheartbreaksatellite @brittmb115 @bigboiseason123 @laysmt @guiltgoreglory @aubreysylvain @leeeesahhh @harriedandharassed @southernbe @ravenouswild @luvrking @r02eg0ld @amythenortherner @walkintheprk @zpandaqueen @silkiers @angel-with-a-heart @kdogreads @boofy1998 @theoremrobin @2valentines @happy--birthday--kiddo @elissaaa @paleidiot @brie-annwyl @str84pedro @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @kyloispunk @tiredbuthappy @yuk-for-president @nopealoupe @blackvelveteen1339 @monboudoir @darleneslane @bbyanarchist @@spideysimpossiblegirl
(if you don't see your @, i got rid of the ones tumblr wouldn't let me tag. Leave me a comment if you'd like to be on the taglist!)
2K notes · View notes
thecruxshadow · 2 years
Text
Jonathan over here talking about cudgelling his brains. And my response be like
Tumblr media
14 notes · View notes
pretend-erin · 3 months
Text
Tumblr media
New issue of Charms & Hexes is out now on GlobalComix!
32 notes · View notes
tallsaints · 1 year
Text
rly struggling w putting down in words how i feel, maybe due to never having a consistent train of thought that makes cohesive sense which i wouldn't want to post bcos what if i look stupid and don't make sense + what's even the point! but ultimately i feel so drowned in shame of myself bcos i think i'm rubbish why would i want to give myself the time to even acknowledge how i feel? rly trying to work against these thoughts bcos i know they're holding me back but i have to start somewhere by typing this out phew
3 notes · View notes
vergilsfavoritebee · 2 years
Text
ppl on social media supporting Russia because Ukraine is a bastion of capitalism and Western ideology have the same vibe as ppl who misgender a trans person whose politics they disagree with
1 note · View note
sonnybonowig · 2 months
Text
Turning back into a Shizaya monster brb
0 notes
claracaboozle · 4 months
Text
you know it's time to take a break when you're drafting an email about a work plan and your brain, unbidden, utters the phrase "my hair is no longer hair it is a grubby little mustard puppy"
i'm gonna go eat glass or something
0 notes