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#but honestly my only free day this week is thursday so we'll see how that goes

ciaossu-imagines · 4 months

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Hey did you get my pms? Hope you're well today

Hey there! So…I've been told by several of you lovely readers that you really appreciate how I'm always really kind to all of you and really understanding. And I try really hard to be kind, to make this a happy, peaceful, fun blog for you guys. And I'm really sorry for anyone I'm going to disappoint here because I'm not going to be as nice as I normally am.

I have received your direct messages. I was sleeping because it was late at night when they came in Thursday night. So I wasn't able to read them until Friday morning before work. I then worked a full shift, as I do have a job that takes up quite a bit of my time, so I wasn't able to answer right away and honestly, I needed to take some time and think about how I wanted to reply to them because of things I'll cover later on. This came into my account around the time I was eating an early-ish supper on Saturday, so the messages hadn't even been sitting unanswered for very long, to be honest. As said, I work a job, volunteer with Mental Health, have to sleep and eat, have regular therapy appointments, have friends in real life I try to see in person or reply to their texts with some regularity (even though sometimes it can take me days or even a week to even answer friends texts) so I don't have as much online time available and what time I have online is largely spent lately writing the actual requests and posts for the blog (mostly in advance, and then finding the time to proof and then post them), clearing my inbox and draft folders. I've been honest and upfront always on this blog that I'm very much trash on replying to private messages and that it does take me a while to find the extra time, and social battery as I am an introvert and sometimes just can't find it in me to want to talk to people directly, to want to message back. On top of that, I had five other people waiting for replies to their direct messages to me that I hadn't replied to either at that point, now four of them, and some of their messages have honestly been sitting there for over a week. I am working on answering people back, but please respect the fact that it can take time and, maybe because of my neurodivergence, but reminders that the direct messages are there and hey, answer them because someone is waiting make me feel really pressured and stressed and definitely not eager to reply or talk to a person.

Now, since you brought this into a publicly answerable space by coming into the inbox, and because honestly, I've been really struggling with how to respond to your messages, I'm going to respond publicly, because most of it I would like to share with everyone who reads this blog. I mean no active disrespect to you by doing so, and will apologize in advance if you take it that way. Below is the private messages sent to me.

First, I do want to say, I do see the compliments in the message. I really appreciate them, they're very kind words, I appreciate the time you took to write them and the fact that reading my posts inspires you to write as well. Thank you very much for every compliment written.

Now, we'll tackle the answers, and things I did want to say, not only to this person but to everyone, step by step. I'm really glad that this person, and many of the others who read my stuff, do see the amount of effort I put into each and every one of my posts. Especially with the AU's, for most of them I really do take at least a day or two, sometimes longer, to really think them out, build up the worlds, figure out how the characters would really translate to this newly built up world, how they'd interact with each other in it, how their relationships in canon can be translated over. For some AU's, I do go and do research to build the actual world…going to use the most recently posted AU here, the mall AU with Eyeshield 21. As mentioned in that post, I went and actually pulled up maps of a mall to consider all the potential stores and since Deimon was really the focus and I set them working at a Cabela's like store, I was like…I know I've been in a Cabela's but how are the stores laid out again, what are all the different sections in a Cabela's and not only did I go look on their website but I phoned a friend I'd been meaning to hang out with anyway and was like 'shopping date? Only thing I ask for stores is that we stop by a Cabela's and you don't make fun of the fact that I'm not going to buy anything, just want to walk the store haha'. With the AU's, the match-up's, the headcanon requests, I'll sometimes even get stuck on whether an idea in my head really matches up with the character and does truly feel right, so I either go watch clips of the character or research, see what trivia I can dig up to either double-check what I already know, or see if I missed anything. So you are right in that, yeah, there is a lot of effort put into my posts and my writing. And I am so, so, SO happy and not at all bothered by putting in that amount of effort. Writing these posts, coming up with the ideas, spinning everything out, it is fun for me, it is something I enjoy, so please don't think that I am complaining about that, just wanting to explain why I'm going to go the direction I am in this reply.

Plain out blanket rule on this blog - if you see something on here you love and you come up with story ideas, with additional headcanons, with something you want to write, draw, do anything creative with? Please, please feel free to do so and to share those things publicly if you are comfortable. I do ask that you give me or my post credit for inspiration, because that would be the polite thing to do and tagging me in it so I can see what you did and geek out and love up on it would make me very happy, but I will be able to shrug it off if you don't, with the only exception to this being The Ever Young, where I do demand credit at the very least because that is at least a year, if not more, of solid world building and character building on my side.

Honestly, even though the AU's and even some of the headcanon posts have given me serious story ideas and I would love to, and plan on, finding the time and creative energy to properly write them out, the fact of the matter is that as writers, based on that one idea, both me and someone else can write it as a story and our stories are honestly probably going to be drastically different, because we'll have different ideas, different views of characters and relationships, different styles and tones to our writing. And I get being inspired by others - I've never made it a secret that the delinquent!Shouhei fic I write and post on here is inspired by some absolutely brilliant and inspiring headcanons shoheiakagi (if you're a fan of K and not following them, please click the link and check them out because they are wonderful and I personally really love their blog and how they help keep the K fandom so alive and active) wrote on their blog and that without those, the fic wouldn't exist.

This particular person though? I'm not sure I love the idea of you taking my ideas and running with them for one very important reason, and maybe it's really mean and petty of me, but it's the reason text on that screengrab of the messages is highlighted. Please make no mistake - what I do on this blog, the headcanons, the AU's, the match-up…everything, really. This is all very, very VERY much writing, just as much so as writing fic. I've written, in my storied fandom career (which started on Quizilla, way back in 2002 guys, yes I am the cryptkeeper), short fic, long fic, roleplaying posts - both as an original character and as canon characters, comfort letters to people from their favourite characters, quizzes, choose your own adventure stories, and what you see posted on this blog and my former one polycanons. And I can absolutely guarantee you that they are all forms of writing, that they all can be extremely time-consuming and hard to write in their own ways, that they all take effort and creativity. To reduce what I do on this blog into 'not exactly writing'…to be honest, I struggled with whether to even answer the messages and how to do so because I do accept my neurodivergence means I might overreact to things at times and I wanted to give my brain time and space to really think on what you sent to see if I was potentially overreacting. But honestly, it's now Sunday, three days after the messages were sent and while I would have liked a little more time to process and think about this, this person seems to want a more immediate answer so… I might be overreacting and I might be being petty, but I am also stating my truth when I say that the way that was worded came off to me as so incredibly dismissive of my hard work on my posts and a little disrespectful of me as an actual writer, to the point where it really invalidated any compliments you did give.

Honestly, while I love each and every single one of you, my constant, lovely readers, and will terribly miss you (my heart will, honestly, ache a little over the loss and I will carry you lovelies in my heart and wish you well) I will ask, as I'm asking this person, that if you really honestly and truly hold the opinion that what I do here on the blog is 'not exactly writing', if you can't even give me that baseline of respect, then please unfollow me and please do not use the ideas that I, as a writer, come up with.

#admin talk #i might be being a bitch #i might be overreacting #but this is how i feel and honestly #those words really hurt both my feelings and my brain #so i am truly sorry for being mean #but I couldn't think of any other way to answer this #like genuinely i am almost crying posting this because i hate being this mean #but i don't know how else to answer because not answering and/or blocking seemed even more horrifically rude and a little undeserved

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justaredheadf1fan · 10 months

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O canada, my beloved

Well, I haven't been here much but heyaaaah!

So, after the turmoil of a weekend lived in Barcelona a couple weeks back, where I didn't even find the words to comment on how cool it was watching the race from the Main Stand, I'm back.

It took a week to deal with the fact that we have to wait another year to go back there, but it was awesome. Especially with a Merc 2-3 on Sunday, which was memorable. What a result, what a feeling seeing the boys up there, what a feeling see it pretty closely. No words.

But now it's time for a very lovely track that I hope brings a tone of chaos this weekend. So, time to check all parts of this. I'll have a late schedule this weekend so Saturday and Sunday, I'll be watching during work or after at home probably. We'll see how much work we have first.

Press conference - Thursday

I honestly haven't been able to watch the interviews because of my schedule and a tone of things I had to do these days, but I just need to comment on Lewis crushing Kevin about his age 🤣

My dude is just one year older than me, leave him alone! 💀 We know he's a dad but he doesn't look old, for fuck's sake Lewis 🥲

Free Practice 1 - Friday

So, the FP1 has started pretty badly for Alpine in general. Pierre stopped on track trying to restart his car and Esteban still in his pit. The session was Red Flagged due to Gasly's impromptu stop on track.

This is taking way too long now for a car stopped on track, but that's just my opinion. What do I know. But it's too long 🤣 Now seriously, the car has been long gone, so what is really going on?

Okay, so apparently it's a CCTV issue, since it's not working and therefore the session cannot be restarted. It looks like it might take a while or even the whole session.

And indeed, the session has been deemed "cancelled" and FP2 will run for one hour and a half instead of just the usual one hour. Super fun for those at the track especially, I bet.

Free Practice 2 - Friday

90 minutes to go in a session where they need to try it all today. Must be stressful, I don't remember any other time when this happened (not that it never happened, I just never saw it).

Not much going on until Nico's engine went to shit causing a Red Flag, generating some very nasty-looking smoke they had to put out with fire extinguishers. It reminded me of Kimi's engines back in 2005, almost every race. Ah, the good times (the year, not Kimi's burning engines weekend in weekend out 🤣).

The Alpines are fucked this weekend, what the hell is this? Between Esteban causing yet another Red Flag and Pierre trying to control the car and barely getting out alive, I don't know what the hell is going on with them. I hope they can fix it for tomorrow.

That rain was something I expected more of in Barcelona, but hope this time comes in time. And indeed, in Canada we trust. That looks fucking insane. This weekend might just make my year.

Lewis ending up P1 after more than half the session or almost all of it at the very back of the list is a sight for sore eyes. One I hope keeps repeating itself but in Quali/the race. If only that 3rd one was Sharl...

Free Practice 3 - Saturday

Well, way too late after getting back from work, but I have FP3 in the background. I just see rain and more rain.

I'm just trying t watch a little without falling asleep if possible, but nothing's going on besides a couple incidents due to such heavy rain (thank goodness in Barcelona the rain was so light despite the dark clouds over us). Carlos spinning and losing half his car around the track was the one that took the cake after a few minor issues.

I'll watch Quali directly tomorrow, I can't take how tired I actually am right now...

Peace out!

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pbandjesse · 5 years

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I don't feel so good. I don't know what hit me all of a sudden but I just feel bad. My jaw started hurting really bad and I started crying and so I took some medicine and the pain is going away but I just feel sick. I think I'm going to have to go eat something. Not fun.

I really prefer James last night. And today. But he was just so sad. I understand why he's hurting so bad about losing something so important to him. Thankfully he does have a second bike but it's not the bike he's had since high school. It's not his favorite thing. And the other bike has to be fixed and that's going to cost him almost $100. We're having terrible bike luck lately. And I hate seeing how much pain he was in.

We slept okay. I think he was just emotionally exhausted and passed out. I slept okay because of the air conditioning. And we woke up around 8. Had a slow morning. James stretched and took a shower. I got dressed and played on my phone. And we left a little bit after he ate a muffin.

We walk to the pet food store and got Sweet Pea stuff. Cat food. And then we walked back to my apartment. James talked to his friend on the phone. And we got back to my place. On the way back in the alley we found two really nice bar stools. So we carried them back to store for when we move. Hopefully we'll have a bar or counter we can use them with because they're really nice.

Our plans were kind of changed because we are originally going to go for a bike ride. Couldn't do that because James is other bike is broken and the bike store wasn't open on Memorial Day. So instead we walked to the bus and went to Patterson Park. It was a nice day out. And I didn't want to waste it.

I felt very anxious about lots of things today. But it was nice being with James. We took the bus and we got up there and my jaw was hurting all of a sudden. So we walked along the edge of the park and went to the Rite Aid. Got some extra sunscreen and aspirin headed back.

And we walked around the pond. Tried to balance a Furby on a lily pad. She only got a little damp. I liked touching the water. And seeing all the fuzzy milkweed looking stuff flying in the air. It's nice just being outside with my boyfriend.

We did that for a while looked at the community pool and found out the prices. When we walked up to the main street to find lunch. Pizza place where we're going to go was closed for the holiday so we went to the cheap pizza place down the street. Which was fine but used a little bit too much cheese. And then we had a back and forth about carrying the leftovers. Because I wanted to put it in tin foil and put it in my backpack. But James want to carry a box and for some reason that stress me out real bad. I don't know why the idea of having that box made me so on edge but it really did. Even if I wasn't carrying it. But James got his way and we went back out.

We went to the thrift store that's on the Main Street that I passed on the bus yesterday. Didn't buy anything but it was fun looking around. And then we went back to the park to see the pagoda.

The Pagoda is funny. It's very pretty and it's a landmark but James didn't really know the history of it. There's no real sign. And so we looked it up and it turns out it was originally called The Observatory. And you can see a lot of different parts of Baltimore from it. Back when everything was shorter. And it was really interesting to see that there really isn't any point to it. It's just pretty. And it was made just to be pretty. They almost demolished it in the 50s but they were stored it in the late 90s. That's cool. It's a really nice building.

We sat in front of it for a little while and then we walked up to go to Rita's. I got water ice. My first water ice of the season. James. Peach and I got Cherry. Poured most of it into my water bottle to save for later and then we went to wait for the bus to go home.

Again I was anxious about the bus but it came. And then we took that and transfer to the free bus to go back to my apartment. I loaded up the cart for James to bring back home with him in our slow move. Just a couple things that fit and I didn't need in my day-to-day life. And then we said goodbye.

I think that's been the hardest thing about packing because I'm still living in this apartment that it's hard to decide what I can give up on the day-to-day stuff. I took down all the art from all the rooms except for my bedroom. And I took a lot of books and put them in suitcases. Still got a lot of books that didn't fit but it's something.

We're making progress though. I think a bunch of my trucks are going to be going half to his parents house and half to his apartment in the coming weeks. I finished packing the one trunk with all of my nick-nacks. Not all all but a good amount of them. Pretty much everything from the bookshelf. And I do have one empty trunk back in my closet then I'm going to be able to use. But I'm trying to use as few cardboard boxes as possible since I have so many containers. And suitcases. And trunks. But it's progress.

I was frustrated with myself because I had just had four days off and I don't feel very rested. Honestly feel stressed out still. I do feel better than I did last week but I just wish I had more time to do nothing. Not that that will make you feel better but I need to finish my lesson plans and I need to finish that to sculpture for the dentist for our trade and I just couldn't get myself to do it. This week I will do that. Tomorrow is the kids art show so I'm not getting home till late but I plan on working on that shoe sculpture and finishing it before Friday. And I'm going to finish my lesson plans on Wednesday on Thursday morning. I want all that done before the end of the week. I'm giving myself a hard deadline. I have to get my act together. Never honestly just been a little overwhelmed by life and everything but the school Year's almost over.

Actually the Saturday is me and James this one year anniversary. We decided that we're going to celebrate on Friday when we both have the day off. And I'm really looking forward to it. Can't believe it's been a year though. Here's to many more.

I'm going to start getting ready for bed now. I have a long day tomorrow. Museum school kids art show sculpture time it's going to be a long day. But I hope it's a good day. And I don't get rained on too much.

I hope you all feel good out there. Sleep well. Good night

#ootd #babe #selfie #tired #good day #weird dog #day off #monday #cat #boy #furby

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tea-and-toblerones · 6 years

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Unison Chapter 4- We'll Blast the Stereo and We'll Drive to Madagascar

Are you ready for a date- Teddy Style?

As always comments, feedback, whatever is encouraged. Every like, every reblog, every comment makes my day!

The first part of the week had flew by mostly due to work and the fact that everyday seemed to be a new catastrophe that left me there long after I was due to leave. Slowly I had fallen back into my old routine. Waking up, going for a run, shower and off to work. When I had climbed out of the shower Tuesday to a text that read ‘Have a good day at work x’ I giggled. Actually giggled. I would like to say it made my day, which it did. Until I got to work and had to sit through a long meeting complaining about how deadlines were being missed and too much time was being wasted on frivolous things. Someone’s muttered comment about this being the biggest frivolous thing, (Most likely Louis) that had ended up extending the rant for at least another fifteen minutes.

Then came Thursday. When I had called about getting more contacts I was told that I was due for my exam and I should just come in. I hated the eye doctor. The puffs of air. The ‘one or two’ ‘two or three’ when they all ending up looking the same. I had messaged Ed that morning asking if today really had to exist.

“Why? What’s wrong with today?’

“I hate going to the doctor.”

His response was almost immediate “Are you okay? Are you sick?”

“I’m fine, it’s an eye appointment. I just hate going to them.”

I was sitting in the waiting room, half watching house hunters that was playing on the tv. My fingers tapping against the arm of the chair. I almost didn’t hear my notification go off, I was so wrapped up with worry.

“They’re a pain, sure, but to want to skip the whole day. That’s bit extreme, innit. Why do you hate them that much?”

“It’s a long story that I really don’t want to type out.”

I heard my name called and slid my phone back in my pocket and went back into the exam room. After the standard routine, the doctor put her clipboard down. “Now let’s get a good look at that left eye. Have you noticed any loss of vision, blind spots, things look slightly skewed or wavy?” I shifted a bit as she was listing off problems. She must have noticed because she looked up from what she was doing. “Adelia?” It almost sounded like she caught a naughty child reaching into the cookie jar.

“Yeah…I’ve noticed that I have problems seeing stuff that’s in front of me. Kinda like I can’t focus on it. It’s like it can tell something’s there but it can’t tell what…” I drift off, staring down at my hands. I had just gotten into the habit of closing it whenever I needed to focus on something.

“Let’s see what’s going on in there, shall we?” After alot of hmms and ahhhs, I was told to stop wearing my contacts and to come back in a month to see if it had improved but it had looked like there could be new scar tissue forming. I trudge out of the office slipping on my sunglasses. I knew that I was most likely going to get bad news which is half the reason I kept shoving it off. I had told myself that I just needed a new prescription, nothing more. I still held a shred of hope that it wouldn’t get any worse.

Since I had the rest of the day off I went home after picking up my new glasses,.I felt slightly guilty, though I only left two hours early. After a couple hours had passed I had remembered that I had been chatting with Ed before I went in. I still wasn’t used to having steady conversations with somebody. Most of them were either work related or quick ask a question, get a response, end of story types of conversations. Nothing with substance. “Why don’t you tell me about it over dinner? Like tomorrow night?” I instantly perk up. It’s confirmed, there’s a date. I knew I shouldn’t have been surprised but there was a little part of me that was worried he would be put off by my brashness. Once it had clicked in that this poor boy had sat in suspense for hours waiting on my reply, I didn’t let the fact I really couldn’t really see my screen stop me. “If kove to! What tike shuilf I meet upu?” I had hoped that my fingers would just know where each key was. The fact that my phone was ringing told me they had betrayed me. Guess I haven’t texted enough for the keyboard to be committed to muscle memory. I guess I’m a terrible millennial. “Cough twice if you’re being held hostage and you need me to come and save you.” He asked jokingly “Is that what it takes for you to come running over?” Keeping my voice light and teasing “That’s mean, innit?” His reply was heavily ladened with mock pain “Besides, you don’t want to be the girl who cried sheep.” “I think- I think you mean wolf Ed. It’s the boy who cried wolf.” “Is it?” There was a brief pause, “I thought he went around going 'the sheep, the sheep.’” The high pitched way he said the sheep and the fact I could practically hear his arm waving around caused a laugh to bubble up. “Hmm…Anyway, don’t do that unless you want a very upset Teddy on your hands. Just ask me to meet up.” “Well we wouldn’t want that.” I pause “I gotta ask-” He already knew what I was asking before it left my mouth. “It’s a nickname from when I was younger. People that are close to me call me that still.” I had the image of a small red headed boy with fuzzy looking hair that went everywhere. It brought a smile to my face. “It’s fitting. You’re pretty cuddly.” After it came out of my mouth I cringe. That’s what every guy wants to hear. You’re cute and cuddly. “Not always.” There was something about the way he said that that made me think there was something more to it than what he was letting on. Before I could ask or put more thought into he had started talking again. “But onto more important matters. I’m guessing that message was saying you saying yes?” “It was. What time should I be at your suite?” “Let’s say 7? Does that give you enough time to get ready after work?” “Plenty. I can’t wait to see what you’ve got up your sleeve.” “I honestly don’t know how I’m gonna top the Simpsons date. That’s usually like what, a third or fourth date? We’re going backwards.” He had a point. We had already spent the night together, but who says we have to follow some strict dating flowchart? “That’s what makes it fun, innit?” Mimicking his often used phrase. “Though we did have a meal first, so I’d say that’s cliché.” “In our pajamas. At 2 in the morning.” “Yknow what we should do then? The most cliché date ever. Dinner and a movie.” He was silent for a moment as he thought it over “How 'bout dinner and let me plan what comes after?” “Oh?” I reply slyly “What do you have in mind?” “Oh aren’t you dirty. You’ll just have to wait and see, love.” His voice dropping to a sultry growl when he said love that caused me to shiver. “Mmm, either way, I can’t wait to see what you have planned.” “See you tomorrow.” I could hear the smile in his voice “See you tomorrow Ed.”

******************************************************* Ed’s POV

I was in the middle of lunch when I hear my phone ring. I almost didn’t answer it, whoever it was could wait until I was finished eating. Yet I found my hand reaching for the small device. When I saw Adi’s name on the screen I hit the accept button. It was the middle of the day so it must be important for her to call while she was at work.

“Adi, are you okay?” A variety of scenarios were running through my head. She got hurt, she got fired, somebody died.

“Hey, Ed.” I could hear regret tainting her voice and my heart both sank and somehow leapt in my throat. “I might have to push our date back a bit. They just dropped alot of work on me because apparently Nobody knows how to enter shit into a computer. And this all needs to be in today. I’m hoping to be out of here by 6 but I thought I’d give you a heads up in case I’m running behind.” I could hear some furious clacking in the background.

At least she’s not cancelling on me. “I’ll be here waiting for you whenever you get done. Just keep me filled in okay. And hey, don’t be too hard on yourself. Or that keyboard.” I hear her huff but the clacking didn’t lighten up. “Oh and if you’re thinking about skipping lunch, don’t. Angry Teddy, y'know?”

The clacking stops and I hear a drawer being pulled open and what sounded like a wrapper crinkling, “There, are you happy?” Her mouth full, apparently to make a point that she was eating something. The typing had started up again, but was significantly less agitated than before.

“There had better be more than that granola bar.” She had mentioned she kept some in her desk when she needed a pick me up during the day. Since she had produced something on such short notice that had to be it.

There’s a long silence before, “How’d you know it was a granola bar? Are you here now?” Her voice creeping up. I could picture the bar sticking out her mouth so her hands were free to continue typing, her head turning, frantically looking for me lurking in a corner.

“No, you told me you kept some in your desk, remember?”

“Oh, oh that’s right. I did didn’t I?” A breath of relief fell out of her mouth. That was a bit odd…though I guess I would be weirded out too.

“You know what they say, work hard, play hard.” I hear her snort and mutter something about all she got was a hard time. “But you go, work and get that done so we can have fun tonight.”

“Okay, well I’m going to go tackle this.”

“Okay, see you tonight”

I close my phone, setting it on the table before returning to my lunch. Being in the music business I was used to plans shifting. Nothing was ever set in stone. People come around asking things like hey, so and so is having a gig, want to swing by? Or there’s a wicked party happening at this house, wanna hit it up? She was annoyed, that much was blatantly clear. Even in her texts I could tell her mood hadn’t improved much. It made me wonder just how much work they had shoved on to her. By the way it was looking she would be out before 7 so everything would still be on time. I had started getting ready and at 6:45 she had messaged saying she just left and was just going home to change and be right over.

The place I had picked was nice, with a laid back feel to it. I wasn’t a fan of overly fancy places. Last time I had dined at one they looked at me like I had rolled in filth and sat down at the table when I asked for a bottle of ketchup. Ever since then I’ve avoided them as much as I could. Plus the food was amazing, the best I’ve found in the city.

There was a knock on my door a little after 7. I pulled door open, my eyes falling on Adi, who’s face quickly broke into a smile. She had chosen a sleeveless dress with a white lacy top, with a deep reddish purple collar. The skirt was the same reddish purple shade, knee length, the type that flairs out when spinning. A small silver purse was across her body. I also noticed her glasses were different. The frames were a bigger, yet the edges were actually thinner. They still black but less rectangular and looked more like an upside down trapezoid. They suited her quite well.

After I found my voice I stutter out “Wow, you look amazing.”

“I wasn’t sure what we were doing so I thought I’d play it safe. You look pretty good yourself.”

I look down at what I was wearing, a navy blue button up and jeans. I grab my key and card before closing the door behind me. Her mood had drastically improved since the last time I had talked to her. She was practically skipping down the hallway.

“I hope you like pasta, the place we’re going has an amazing penne alla vodka.”

She let out a pretty unlady like snort “Who doesn’t like pasta?”

“People who choose not to eat carbs.”

“You don’t want those types in your life anyway. They’re usually bitches. Probably wouldn’t be so cranky if they’d eat some damn bread.” She shook her head in disbelief.

“Then you’re going to love this place.”

“Good cos I’m starving.”

**********************************************

As we walked through the restaurant I turned my focus on her. She was looking around the room with a sort of child like wonderment. The top half of walls were covered in thousands of old vintage photos that were placed close together while the bottom was covered in wood planks. There were party lights strung along the walls between the photos adding a light party vibe. The tables were covered in a red and white checked pattern, surrounded by either dark wood chairs with either red or green cushions or red booths. I nudge her arm and point up to the ceiling that was covered in posters. Since I had came through a couple times I had a good rapport with most of the staff. They had led us to a separate room, so we could dine in peace. There was more of an intimate feel, the lights were dimmed and the ceiling was covered in a wine rack, with vines and bundles of grapes woven through to mimic a vineyard. She slid into the booth and I debated on whether I should sit beside her or not. Eventually deciding to just sit across from her.

“Ed this place is wonderful!” Her eyes sparkling as she looked at the pictures on the wall. That smile playing across her face again.

“I wish it was warm enough to sit outside. It’s decorated like a plaza in Italy. Busts, fountain, you’ve got this,” I point the the ceiling, “I don’t know what it’s called, spanning over head. Light music playing.”

“It sounds delightful, but I love right where we are. Now, down to business.” She flipped her menu open scanning through the dishes. I put my hand on the menu lowering it down. Her eyes flicked up. They were a light green shade today, with specks of moss and a bit of bark around the edges.

“I should probably add that dishes are served family style.”

“So we’ll be sharing.” She flipped the menu closed. “I’ll let you pick.”

“Are you sure? I’m okay with eating whatever-” She waved her hand, brushing me off.

“I saw the way your eyes lit up when you were talking about the vodka penne. There is no way I’m denying you that. And I want to see if it’s as good as you say.”

This woman…the last girl I was with was picky about everything she ate. Not to mention she went through every food fad you could think of. It made going out to dinner a real hassle. Not that we really did alot anyway, with me being away all the time.

By that time that time the waiter had arrived, the same one I usually had, a fellow by the name of Phillip.

“Ed! It’s so great to see you again. Oh, you brought a lady this time. Fine choice I must say and a good decision bringing her here too.” Sending a wink her way causing her skin to gain a slight pink glow and laugh to fall from her lips. “Now, is it going to be the usual or are we going with something different? Shall I suggest the spaghetti and meatballs? Have yourself a real 'Lady and the Tramp’ moment.” His eyebrows wiggling.

“Well Phillip, I talked the penne alla vodka up and now Adi wants to try it.”

He glanced over to her, which she nodded in agreement. “It’s true. If you could have seen his face…well I’m guessing you have, considering…how could I say no to that?”

“If there’s anything you’d like to sample, just let me know. One of the best things about being seated at the chef’s table is you get to try a bit of everything.”

She looked surprised for a second, her eyes darting around the room before she responded “I like pasta.” Which caused me to snort because she was usually so full of words. She seemed to realise this wasn’t a complete thought so she added “So whatever you recommend us try will be alright with me.”

“See, at least one of you is adventurous.” He shot my direction, with a teasing smile, “Now, drinks?”

I ponder for a moment, nowhere near an expert on wine pairings. “Whatever pairs best with our food.” I turn to Adi “Do you have a preference?”

“Not usually, but I’m feeling red tonight.” There was a small smile on her lips. Like an inside joke I wasn’t in on.

Phillip nodded, scooping up our menus. “I’ll be right back with your wine.”

As soon as he was out of earshot Adi whip around to me “This is the chef’s table?” she hissed.

“Yep, the kitchen is right through that door. Why did you think there was only one table here?”

She shrugged. “Didn’t put much thought in it really. Make sense I 'spose.”

Sometimes by the way she talks and reacts to things, it’s almost like she forgets who I am. That I’m not just a dorky English boy here for Uni or a holiday. Well, I guess I was technically here on holiday. Poor choice. It did bring up one concern for me. How would she handle being linked to someone so well known. Would she melt under the scrutiny? Would it all go to her head and I create a horrible monster? Would she turn out to be just like Al? Cold, greedy and only out for herself? Dropping people as soon as they weren’t any use to her? As I watched her laughing and joking with Phillip, I shoved that thought out of my mind. No she’s too sweet to ever be that cold.

Once Phillip left after dropping of our bottle of wine I decided to turn the subject to something that had been eating at me for the past 36 hours.

“So, why do you hate the eye doctor so much?”

She was taking a sip of her wine, savoring the flavor before she swallowed. “Okay, wow, that’s great wine.” She set the glass down, “Because I don’t want to hear I have to have another surgery on my eye.”

“Another surgery? So you’ve already had one?”

I saw her shift slightly, “Yeah…to fix the damage from when this happened.” She pointed to her scar. “There’s a chance that more scar tissue can develop that would cause them to have to go back in and fix it again.”

“Can you see out it?”

She nodded. “Yeah, but it’s, oh how did the doctor put it….” She thought for a moment before shaking her head. “I can’t really focus on things. It’s like how when you wake up in the morning and everything’s out of focus.”

That explained why she shot pool with one eye closed. It threw her off if she tried it with them both open. "So, do you have to have surgery?“

“No, not yet but I have to go back in a month to check it again. She thinks there might be some starting. We’re going to see if my new glasses help.”

“No more contacts?”

“No more contacts.” She seemed slightly upset about that.

“Well, not that you asked but, I like you with your glasses Especially those new ones.”

“Oh?” She reached up and adjusted them. “I’ll have to keep that in mind then.”

When Phillip brought out our meal Adi’s mouth dropped open. One of the things they pride themselves in is making sure you don’t go home hungry. The dish took up the majority of the table, roughly the size of a large pizza and it was filled way past the top in a glorious mountain of pasta.

“That’s alot of pasta.” She stuttered out. She doesn’t know about Teddy Two Meals. She’s going to learn tonight.

Phillip laughed “You said you liked pasta. And your date, really, really likes pasta. Trust me, you’ll be grateful when I bring out some others to try.”

“Ed, there’s no way we can eat all this! And more? No way. Nun uh.”

I grab a fork and begin digging in. “You underestimate my power, love.”

Her eyebrow flew up with a slight smile. “All that power but you don’t have the high ground so…” She winked before sticking her fork in her mouth, her eyes falling closed and moaning. “Oh my god, this is amazing.”

So, she reacts that way to pasta, I wonder how she’ll react to my…no, Ed, don’t go there. I shove the thought out of my head and decide to vocalise “You know Star Wars?” instead.

“Mhmm, me and Nate used to watch them all the time when we were little.”

“I’ve got a lego Death Star that I put together while I was on tour. Ended up getting dropped while being moved but I got another one and it’s at my house back home…” Okay, well she probably thinks you’re nothing but a giant man child now.

“You have any now?” She was spearing a couple noodles onto her fork. Phillip had brought us separate plates but both of us seemed perfectly content eating it straight from the bowl.

“What, any legos? No, why?”

She shrugged “Thought it was something we could do on down days. You seem to enjoy building them by the way your face lit up.”

“I’m definitely going to pick some up now.” Is she even real? There’s no way I find someone like this after how low I’ve sunk. That’s just not how the world works.

I soon found out I had no reason to worry about being childish. She had flipped one of the noodles around in her mouth and was now blowing it like a whistle while crossing her eyes, causing me to spit some of my wine back in my glass. She grinned as she chewed, seeming pretty proud of herself. Part of me wondered if the wine had something to do with it. She was definitely alot more giggly than she was earlier. When Phillip brought a smaller plate of spaghetti and meatballs she turned to him and blurted out,

“Those meatballs are huge! You’re killing me Phillip. You’re killing me with pasta but if that’s how I go, that’s how I go.” She stuck her fork into it, cutting off a piece. A part of me wanted to say I had plenty of practice with big balls since I washed mine everyday but it seemed a little too crude to say at the table in a restaurant

. Despite what Phillip had said, the first time I came here I sampled everything so I knew what to expect. She was right, the meatballs were huge, the size of tangerines. I decided to pay her back for the recorder noodle by doing the same thing with the spaghetti. It backfired, slapping against my face, splattering sauce all over me and my glasses causing her to burst out laughing. Another perk of being at the chef’s table. We could be as loud as we wanted and not disturb another diner.

When the chef came out, Adi leaned forward and whispered “You think he’s gonna yell at us cos we’re being obnoxious?” Turns out he was pleased with all the laughter. According to him good food should bring about lots of laughter and joy. He wasn’t wrong. We chatted a bit with him, before he left and came back with our final dish, a giant slice of cheesecake topped with cherries. He was beaming with all the praise she was giving him about the food and said we deserved it. When he set the slice on our table she groaned saying how there was no way she could eat cheesecake on top of all the pasta.

“Ah come on, there’s a second stomach for dessert.” I sang as sank my fork into the thick, creamy filling. I held my fork out for her to take a bite. She stared at it for a moment before leaning forward and taking it into her mouth. She muttered fuck it, grabbed her fork and dug in with me.

Once everything was finished and plates cleared away (Adi muttering in disbelief that we ate every bit of it) we chatted for a little bit before we went to the second part of the date. Her hand found mine on the ride, her head resting on my shoulder. I was starting to worry that maybe it was too much food and I had put her into a food coma when I saw her eyes were closed, with a smile on her face. When the taxi stopped in front of Uni’s she perked up, looking slightly puzzled.

“We’re not recreating our meeting our we? I don’t think I could handle that hangover two weeks in a row. Also, I don’t think the food will taste as good coming back up.”

“No, I saw that they had karaoke so I thought we could enjoy a show. That way we can still talk if we want to.”

She patted my arm in an apologetic way. “Karaoke Night is Saturday. Friday’s are performances.”

“Still good, innit? They aren’t all metalcore are they?” I didn’t think I could handle another round of blaring metal music.

“No, they have a pretty big variety come through here. It’s usually acoustic stuff.”

We head in and Adi leads me upstairs to the staging area. I glance at the pool table where we were playing a week ago, a smile coming across my face at the memory. There wasn’t as many people here tonight, so we were able to get a table with a good view of the stage. I went to get drinks as she settled in, asking for a whisky and coke. As I was waiting on the drinks the guy who was performing tonight came on stage. Lightly teased light brown hair, slight beard. Plain grey sweater with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, pair of jeans and what looked like vans, holding a guitar. He certainly didn’t look like he played metal. He gave off more of a folk music vibe. I sat down beside Adi, placing her drink in her hands. She thanked me, taking a sip.

After he finished tuning he began singing. His voice was on the deeper side, with a definite folk sound. He sounded pretty good, I could tell he was used to playing in front of people because his stage presence was solid. He’d play an original song, then a cover to keep everyone involved and interested. He also took requests that were shouted out and his banter was light and fun. Mostly poking fun at himself.

“So come on, get higher, loosen my lips Faith and desire and the swing of your hips Just pull me down hard And drown me in love.”

I look over to see Adi with her eyes closed mouthing the words along with him, swaying in her seat. Her fingers idly playing with the stir stick in her drink. Once he finishes the song I lean over to her “Do you know him?” Of course she could have just known the song but the way her face brightened when he started talking told me better.

“Mhmm, that’s Levi. He’s one of the regulars, he plays here at least once a month. He was a part of our group. We kinda fell apart when this place caught fire. Chances are this is his first time performing since they’ve reopened.”

“Why don’t you invite him to have a couple drinks with us once he’s done?” My question seemed to surprise her.

“You sure? We are on a date after all.” She took a swig of her drink, draining the last bit of it.

“Yeah, why not? We had the romantic part.” She snorted, probably remembering the sauce splattered all over my glasses. “Okay, we had the dinner part.”

She shrugged “Okay, yeah, it’ll be great to catch up.”

It wasn’t too much longer he was wrapping up his set. Adi had hopped out of her chair and weaved her way to the edge of the stage where he was putting his guitar away. She tapped him on the shoulder and when he turned around I could see the surprise on his face from where I was sitting. He had pulled her into a hug and I hadn’t realised how tall he was until then. Granted, Adi was short, I had at least five inches if not more on her but this guy. This guy towered over her. When they had reached the table I had stood up.

“Levi, this is-” Adi had started, but he had cut her off.

Dammit I was curious at how she was going to introduce me.

“Oh, I know exactly who this is.” He didn’t look star struck or even remotely surprised. No, I couldn’t quite put my finger on that expression. His voice was pleasant enough. My face however must have looked worried because he clapped a hand on my shoulder. “No worries, everyone’s a family here. You’re safe. What happens at Uni, stay’s at Uni. Unless you take them home with you.”

He held his hand out, which I took, my hand dwarfed in his. I was also surprised by how rough it was. “Nice to meet you Levi.”

He nodded, pointing at the bar. “I’ll buy the next round. What are you guys having?”

When he left to get the drinks I looked over to Adi “Did you tell him who you were here with when you asked?” I asked casually

“No, I just asked if he wanted to join me and the guy I was with for drinks. Why?”

Well, that’s vague. “Because he didn’t seem surprised at all to see me. It surprised me as all.”

“Don’t know what to tell you. Maybe he doesn’t get starstruck easy. Besides, I thought you like that?”

“I do.”

She reached over and grabbed my hand. “He wasn’t lying when he said no one would say you were here.” Before I could answer he had came back with our drinks. He pulled a chair up from the neighboring table and settled in across from Adi. I decided to strike up a conversation “So Levi, what do you do for a living, or do you sing full time?”

“I’m a contractor, but singing professionally is a dream of mine. But you don’t want to hear about my boring life. Your life is where it’s at. What’s it like touring and being on the road?”

“Lonely.” I had said, without really thinking much about it. Both of them looked at me, Levi confused, Adi with sympathy. Deciding that I was not about to bring the mood down, I quickly add “But it’s never a dull moment. Seeing all these different places. It’s surreal. It really makes you appreciate the little things though. Like beds and a homecooked meal. God, I haven’t had a proper fry up in ages.” I added as an afterthought.

“What’s a fry up?” Adi chimed in. “Oh, um, it’s breakfast.”

“It’s different in Britain?” Levi had asked, mildly curious

“Yeah, kinda, it’s similar, but there are some differences. You don’t really find it here in the States.” I shrugged it off, taking a drink of my beer. I didn’t want to spend the night discussing the difference between English and American foods.

Levi’s attention had turned to Adi “So, what have you been up to? Surely you’ve gotten that promotion by now. You were working your ass off to get brought up the last time you were here.”

“Ah…no…not yet…I’m still chugging away, yknow doing all the stuff they’re too lazy to do themselves.”

He shook his head. “They’re idiots then. No one deserves it more than you.”

“Yeah, well try telling that to Greg.” She muttered bitterly. “I almost didn’t get to make our date because of him.”

His eyes widened at that, and for a brief moment there was a look of shock that rushed across his face. There it was, the reaction I had been waiting for, even though he tried his best to conceal it. “Wait, if you’re on a date, why am I here? I’m intruding.”

He made to get up but I stopped him, “Nah mate, stay.”

“You sure?” He was half hovering over his seat.

“Yeah, stay. Everything’s funner with friends, innit?”

He sank back down, taking another swig of his beer. I wasn’t sure why I wanted him to know that she was here with me. He hadn’t been acting like he was interested in her. They really did seem like nothing more than old friends. It was just something about the way he said I know exactly who this is. There was almost a distrust or anger behind it. Then it clicked. He’s saw the articles the gossip sites have wrote about me. How I was quickly burning out, spiralling out of control with alcohol and drug abuse. How I cheated on my ex. How my holiday was a ruse and I was really in rehab. He must have believe all of it. Even if most of it was lies, people just love a scandal. He thinks I’m bad news…maybe he’s right…

We had spent a majority of the night with me telling them about crazy celebrity stories and what he had to look forward to when he made it big. I had promised to send a copy of his demo off to some bigwigs in the industry.

“-I ended up waking up in Jennifer Aniston’s sun room. Not even shitting you. I didn’t even know where I was. I just knew it was bright as fuck and my head was throbbing. It took me a minute to remember what had happened the night before. She probably had no clue I passed out there. I just got up, grabbed my shit and left.”

They were both laughing hysterically, Adi’s cheeks were flushed from laughing so much, mixed with the amount of alcohol we’d consumed. I could feel the warming effects myself. Levi pushed his chair back and stood up.

“Well as much fun as it’s been kids, I’m gonna call it a night and head home.”

He gave Adi a quick hug and me another handshake before heading out the door. I look over at Adi and I could tell she was getting tired as well.

“You want to head out too?”

She nodded, stifling a yawn behind her hand, the other one coming up under her glasses rubbing her eye. She such a cute sleepy girl. I settled the tab and we headed out the door. The cool air waking me up a bit.

“I only live a block away from here if you wanna walk there.”

“A block away, huh? Alright, lets go.” As we were walking I remember her saying something about the bar catching fire. Which explained why some of the bricks were blackened. I just assumed it was some jackasses playing around with booze and lighters, seeing how could make the biggest fireball “Hey, didn’t you say they had to rebuild this cos it burned down?’

"Yep. Took out most of the block.”

“So…you were living here when it happened.”

“Yep…..” She paused, “I was actually supposed to be there that night. I fell asleep and got woken up by all the commotion. The firetrucks, people running through the halls banging on doors telling everyone to get up.”

“Jesus, that sounds awful.”

“Yeah…yeah it was awful…” She had a far away look in her eyes but snapped out of it pretty quickly. “But luckily no one got hurt. So there’s the silver lining I guess.” She pulled a door open and we began climbing stairs. Flight after flight after flight. “Sorry, I live at the top…If I would have thought about it I would have just used the elevator.” Her voice echoing through the empty stairwell.

We finally reached the top and she led me to her door. She lingered outside it for a moment. “I had a great time, though I’m pretty sure I could have a great time with you anywhere.”

“Oh? Well, we might have to test that.” Grinning at her.

“What you got?

"Off the top of my head? Traffic jam.”

“Oh, you mean an impromptu sing along? Blast the stereo and just jam? Oh, god, the horror.” I laughed, then realised I was being kinda loud so I bit down on my bottom lip. “You’re fucking sexy as hell when you do that.” she uttered it almost like a confession.

My mouth was on hers before she could react. She wasn’t thrown for long, her arms coming around my waist, pulling me tighter to her. I gently backed her into the door, pressing her against it. My hands running down her body, brushing over her hips. She responded by sliding her tongue into my mouth. Her hands had slid down and was now gripping my ass, tongue still expertly exploring my mouth. I slid my hand under her skirt, dragging my fingers along her bare thigh. She didn’t pull away, if anything, it seemed to spur her along. I glided over to her panties, rubbing her over the fabric, which caused her to moan lightly. I moved the fabric aside, running a finger along her slit, which was beginning to become slick. When I slipped my finger inside she moaned louder into my mouth. When I added my middle finger she groaned loudly. Her hold on me tightened and I continued to slide my fingers in and out of her curling them inward slightly as I did so. Then, without warning, she broke away.

“No, not like this Ed.” Her voice was soft

“Wot? Do you not like it?” I asked confusingly. She seemed to be enjoying it a moment ago.

“ I do, just, not while we’re drunk. I want you but not like this. I don’t want sloppy drunken sex. I want…” She trailed off, her eyes falling to the floor.

The drunken haze seemed to lift and I realised the indecency of the situation. The skirt of her dress as bunched up to her stomach, her panties shoved aside. I was finger fucking her in her hallway for anyone to see. She was right, I wanted her but not like this. She’s not an one night stand, someone that I’d fuck and never see again. I pull my fingers out and adjust her skirt for her.

“Jesus fucking Christ, Adi, I’m so sorry. I’m a fucking ass.”

She unlocked her door, pushing it open. "You gave me plenty of time to say no and stopped when I did.“ She jerked her head toward the door, "Now, come on, let’s get some coffee in you.”

#ed sheeran #teddy sheeran #code ginger #ed sheeran fanfic #ed sheeran mature fanfic #ed sheeran smut

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justaredheadf1fan · 1 year

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Back to hell in Jeddah

Well, hi!

Second race weekend take the cake? I'm not an optimist taking into account Sharl is starting the weekend off with a penalty. Way to go, yay!

I'm gonna keep the same structure as last weekend, I like the organization better. Just gonna add up some color to the subheadings, seeing all the text in white and trying to find the thicker font is giving me a headache. I'm late watching and writing it all since as usual I was entertained by other things. I might even start the chaos of watching everything quite late as last summer since I might be starting work on Formentera almost a month earlier. We'll see how I manage this this time around.

Press conference - Thursday

Honestly, the only interesting comments from the first press round were coming from Yuki. I'm biased, he was the only interesting driver for me on there, but you know. I have to say though, seeing Lando talking about how they need to improve the car and all is so funny to me. Suck it up, Buttercup.

I like how Yuki talks, so eloquently, more analytically maybe, or at least he seems super focus. I'm more used to seeing him they way he's always shown, shouting in the car or joking around with Pierre, but this calmer version of him is also good to see. I really find him super endearing, honestly.

The second press round looks much better, at least 4 of the drivers are worth listening to.

Poor Estie Bestie talking about the hundred different penalties he got during the race 2 weeks ago. I hope he gets a better race this weekend, at least.

I wanna hug Lance, seriously. It's still a wonder how he's there after breaking his wrists, having surgery, coming back right away and all. Braver than the US marines, my boy.

We don't care about Checo unless he's fighting with his teammate, so moving on. Last but certainly never least, Lewis glowing all around, he's so calm, he's so chill.

Free Practice 1 - Friday

Sunny FP session this afternoon to start the weekend. That must be a hell of a hot day.

Honestly, not much has been going on apart from the stupid rumblings of the Spanish commentators, to which I no longer pay attention at this point. It's a good thing that this is a quiet session since this track is Hell.

There have been a couple of close calls with a Haas and another car that I can't remember now, but it could've been scary material if you know what I mean. And a few off track trips on Turn 22 maybe? But other than that, not much else. So, that's why I've been making the most out of the session since I barely had to look at the screen to begin with. Nice (?)

The one really fantastic update that's worth mentioning above else honestly is the helmet cam on Lewis. Now, that's a view I enjoy.

Just a few problems for Checo I see and that's about it and it's right at the end of the session anyway so 🤷🏻‍♀️

Free Practice 2 - Friday

I may be speaking way too quickly but the second session of the day is looking quite like the first one, calm and quiet.

And indeed it was. I haven't paid that much attention due to the lack of interesting stuff going on. A few problems with the traffic, but not much else. I mean, yeah we already know RBR are leading, Aston Martin are pretty much crushing it and blah blah blah.

The most interesting was seeing Sid the Sloth almost going up against the wall a few times, but we can never get that lucky as to seeing him scratch the car enough as in 2021 during Quali. Ah, good times.

Anyway, more tomorrow and hopefully Quali's a kicker.

Free Practice 3 - Saturday

Sooooooo, here we go again with another session of nothing and a little bit more of nothing. Same as yesterday, I'm afraid.

I hope we get a little more excitement in Australia during Free Practice since it's not this hellhole, at least the chances of half the drivers killing each other accidentally will be a tad lower.

Yeah, definitely a truly quiet breakfast experience watching this at 2pm. There's nothing to comment on about this session, honestly. So I'll just leave it here.

Quali better be something else, for the love of all things... interesting? However that phrase goes 🤣

Peace out!