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rinbowaman · 8 months

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"Turn Around..."

One shot fic. (Not relating to any of the established series.) This is a bit different from what I normally draft up, kind of like the Robin Hood one shot, which is also a non-yandere fic like this one. Pls enjoy.

Thank you for taking the time and reading my stories and drabbles. To show your support, please consider donating into my ko-fi account ♥️

Warnings: Unprotected smut, breakup, lovers reunited, makeup sex, rough sex, a little bit of angst, taken for granted, apologetic make lead, regretful male lead, and drama. "Dont know what you got till it's gone" type vibe. not proofread but figured i'd get this out to keep yall busy until i get the next chapter of TO out 😉

Summary: You and Heeseung had a break up, despite all that has happened, you find out that you weren't the only one hurting.

“Hey.” he stands calmly at the door. You avoid making eye contact, too nervous and shy on what to say. A bit of a ridiculous notion considering you knew the man very well, dated for quite some time in fact, yet the lack of his efforts drove you to the point where you had to kill off the relationship, for our own happiness. The only issue was, that you’re not sure if you’re any happier now than you were when dating him. Nodding, you respond back with a soft “hey…”

Walking in, his initiative causes you to walk back. He lets himself in and gently shuts the door behind, never breaking his sight away from you. You kept shifting your sight from one area on the floor, to another. He continues to take his steps forward, and you keep taking them back. Soon, he has you pinned against the wall. Palming the wall, one hand off to each side, he traps you in his arms and leans in, wanting to get closer. You dip down and swoop under his arm to get away freely into the open space, walking over to the living room, much to his grimace dismay.

Sitting on one end of the couch, you cross your legs and prop your hands up to rest your chin. Intent on avoiding eye contact, you look away and kept your face in the opposite direction. He walks over calmly and sits next to you.

“Y/n….”

“Heeseung stop. Could you please just get your things and go? I’m not in the mood to talk.” you snap, rubbing your temples as you adjust your body to shift up and away, standing before the tall window, waiting for him to move along and to get out. But he doesn't.

Looking up from where you were just sitting, he remains on the couch wide eyed and slightly appalled. Sure, he went along with the break up, even dabbled and went on some dates even though you both had just broken up merely two weeks ago. However, it didn’t mean that he wasn’t hurting either. He only went and saw other girls just to try and take his mind off of you, but how are you supposed to know? He left you no choice, you didn’t ever see your relationship coming to an end. You worked and tried to get through to him, but he never listened, so then you were left with no choice but to break things off, yet you couldn’t help but feel stabbed when his nonchalant attitude and response to your initiation was given, almost too easily, as if he was thinking about breaking up himself.

Seeing you standing in that silk camisole dress, lazily covered with the matching satin short robe over it, had him feeling some type of way. How long has it been since he saw you like this? No makeup, hair laying freely and barely dressed. You looked so beautiful, stunning in fact, and yet your body language and attitude made you achievable for him to grab hold on. Did he really lose you for good?

“Y/N…” he tries once more, keeping a respectable distance away, so as to not add any fuel to the fire. “Can’t we just talk?”

That did it for you. NOW, he wants to talk? Now? After seeing a handful of girls, pretending like you no longer mattered after you presented him with the words “I’m not sure if this is working out…I wished you would just be more considerate, yet you just always put me off to the side. Maybe we should consider a brea–”

Remember the tone he had in his voice, he cut you off and finished your sentence, almost as if he was eager and looking forward to the word…as if he was taking your initiation as an opportunity to end everything without having to do the dirty work himself. “Break? Yeah sure, I think that would be good for us.” he told you. Never once trying to figure out the meaning behind your initiative, nor did he ever try to fight for you. But now, it seems he had a change of heart, but you weren’t wanting to hear any of it. Not after having a string of girls by his side the last few nights. What were you? A rebound? Were you just a safety net since it didn’t work out with those girls? What is this?

Turning away, you snapped in a harsh tone. “No!”

“What?” His voice was a little more firm, and he seemed a bit irritated by your attitude.

“I said no. I don't want to talk.”

“Why are you–” he pauses. “Y/n…you act like you’re the only one that is affected by all this. You’re not. I’m struggling too, you know.”

“Yeah, I can tell. You’re hurting so much, how many girls did you seek out for comfort? Five? We’ve only broken up two weeks ago and you never once wanted to talk, until now.”

Standing from his seat, he grew offended by your words and replaced his soft and gentle gaze with a more stern and harsh one. Walking over to you, he nearly traps you in as he breaches your personal space and begins to walk you back to the wall, again.

“What? You think those girls meant something? Seriously?”

“Are you kidding me? Don’t pretend you’re hurting, you nearly jumped for joy when I brought up the idea of taking a break. You think I don’t know? Get over yourself Heeseung!” Turning sharply, you try to get away from him, but his movements are quick and he restricts your fleeing attempts by hugging you from behind. You struggle and try to break free, yet the moment he pushes forward with you grasped in his arms, shoving you up against the wall chest first and his chin resting on your shoulder, burying his face in your neck, you begin to falter, but mentally maintain your resistance. Taming you, he senses your physical strength decreasing front he struggles, and continues to push you in, resting you on the flat surface as he closes the distance between your backside and his chest. Stroking his thumb, he caresses your waist as he hugs tightly. With small brush strokes of his lip, he softly pecks on the soft area of your neckline.

“Stop…” You whimper out, trying to ignore the beautiful sensation of how his lips felt gently kissing, and sucking on your skin. “Stop…please….get away…”

“You really want me to get away?” he mumbles, with a mouth full of your delicate skin in his mouth. “Then say it. Tell me in all sincerity that you want me to stop and I’ll leave.”

With your arms pinned to your body by his embrace, you reach up and lean your palms against the wall, pressing your body against his. You tilt your head back, resting it against his shoulder, you didn’t want him to stop, nor did you want him to leave. But you had to be strong, for the sake of mending your broken heart. So, with a shaky breath, you whined out.

“Get away…” you nearly whispered, your hair draping over your face and your robe coming undone, bearing the nakedness of your shoulders and cleavage. “Just…get away…”

A slight pause was present, before he leans in and resumes his efforts as he takes in a mouthful of your soft skin, just below your ear, this time he was less gentle and more rough in his manners.

“I said no….” you whimpered. His arms tightened around your arms and waist, and he slightly lifts you before shoving you further up against the wall, pressing your cheek to rest against the surface before whispering in your ear…

“I don't believe you.”

Shooting his hand around, he lifts the hem of your camisole up and fingers his way through panties. He called you out on your bluff and you didn’t seem to mind, because now you get to show how much you missed him, that you didn’t want to leave. You get to show him that you were hurting, and that he left you without any options or hope to continue forward, that you were just at the lowest part of your life. He knew it too. He wasn’t being his best self with you, in fact he was selfish and led you with so many false promises, it’s no wonder you proposed a break up. It didn’t hit him until you started to usher out those words, but before you could finish, he beat you to the punch, all because he saved himself from the heartbreak of hearing you say it, so he had to say it first. Figuring he would save himself by hurting you, then to be hurt directly, he found that it was all for nothing. Right after walking away and leaving you to go on your own, a sharp pain hits him inside, and he immediately regrets it. He regretted going with the flow, and letting you go so easily. Fact is, he turned around, wanting to run back after you, but seeing your backside facing him, walking in the opposite direction without so much as a glance back over to him, compelled him to look the other way and to move forward, after all, it seemed you had no trouble doing just that.

Taking your hand, he intertwined his fingers with your own, his kisses became more passionate and his embrace became tighter as his hands roamed. God he missed you. He missed how your body felt against his, and how your skin tasted. He missed how you sounded when he kissed that one little spot on your neck, and how your body shakes when he touches you. He missed you too much.

“Tell me you don’t want me to leave this time….tell me we belong…tell me…so I can do what I’ve really been wanting to do for the last two weeks…with the one woman I’ve been wanting. Tell me baby…”

Softly sobbing, you whimpered and gasped out, immediately trying to catch your breath as you cried out your words.

“I never wanted it to end in the first place…”

Peeling his head back, he stood slightly shocked at your words. Before he could ask questions, you finally let it all out. It was long overdue, and the most painful sense of release you ever felt.

“Why couldn’t you just have turned around?....I stood…watching you walk away. I mentally begged for you to turn around and come back…but you just kept moving on…you left me crying….and I just had no choice but to finally do the same….you didn’t come back. What was I supposed to do? Stand and wait in that spot forever? And those girls?....I just knew…you didn’t care….”

Your words hit deep and cut a wound that may never heal. He had no idea that you waited. He did turn back but he was too late…probably by mere seconds. The image he recalls of you walking away, was imagined with you displaying a calm and tranquil look on your face. Now, he understands that you made your way back home in tears that night, and longed for him to come back to you.

He gulps. In a single brief moment, your entire relationship flashes before his eyes, and he realizes that not only did he not give you his best during, but he didn’t give it to you after. Yeah, he tried to get his mind off you by going on dates, but how were you supposed to know that? He started to think how his behavior must have looked to you…how hurtful it must have been to hear about his rendezvous while you were sitting here longing for him to come back. But what killed him in all of this was that, had he just been less attentive towards his friends and set his priorities straight, none of this would have happened. How many times did he come home and skip eating the dinner you prepared, all because he decided to eat with the guys after work. Or whenever you asked to spend time with him, and he promised you he would have another day, one where he didn’t have plans, yet that day never came. How many times did he wake up, shower, and quickly breezed through the kitchen and sees that you prepared breakfast for him, yet instead of sitting and eating with you, thanking you for taking the time to feed him, he picks bits and pieces off his plate and heads out while jutting out the words “see ya!” and quickly leaves so he could be the first in line at the coffee shop…that coffee shop…the coffee shop you loved yet he never took you with. He knew your favorite order yet never brought you back anything. He was always so focused in grabbing his drink and heading to work, where he could spend nearly the entire day chilling out with the guys doing what they love, spending a great deal of overtime, before finally calling it a night. How many times did he have the opportunity to come back home, especially after seeing all his friends dipping out to go back to their loved ones that were waiting for them…and yet he stayed back, opting to hit up buddies who were single and could spare the time, instead of coming back home to you. How many times did he come back home so late at night, finding you already asleep. How many times did he crawl into bed with you, and instead of hugging you and kissing you, he turns the opposite direction and falls asleep, leaving you to not only feel lonesome during the day when you’re awake, but at night when you’re asleep too. Just how many times…did he take you for granted?

He didn’t have any words. He felt hurt…he felt a great deal of pain, and it was nothing that you did, you were great…you were perfect in fact. The one that hurt him was himself.

Remaining silent, he leans back into your neck. Shoving his lips against your ear, feeling the shrug of your shoulders as the oversensitive sensation of feeling his lips pressed against you was immense and triggered potent arousal. Whispering, he merely tells you “I’m sorry…”

His soft whisper made you cry even more. Feeling you shake as you sobbed harder, he holds on tightly and kisses you on that soft spot again…and again….and again. Until your sobs turned into moans. Sucking on your neck, he reaches up and grabs onto your throat, gently but firmly holding on as he pulls your hips back. His free arm hugs your waist and tugs onto you, while his grab around your neck keeps your face and chest close to the wall. Pressing his groin against your derriere, he takes in a large whiff of your scent, that subtly sweet perfume that he liked so much…he missed it. The one thing he grew complacent in taking in daily, yet the moment he thought he lost it forever, he realized it was the most beloved scent produced in this world. The feel of your touch, your skin, hair, and your soft lips, was something he didn’t realize how much he loved. It had been longer than two weeks since he last felt you, growing too comfortable and spending more time away from you throughout the course of your relationship, it had been a while since you both were last intimate. It wasn’t that he didn’t love you or cared, he just didn't have his priorities straight. He just always thought that no matter what, you were always going to be around for whenever he needed or wanted you. But when was that? When did he express how much he needed or wanted you? When did he last make you feel appreciated and desired? More importantly, when was the last time he made himself available to you? Knowing that you wanted and needed him, yet he never was there for you.

“God…I’m such a fucking idiot…” he hums out with a mouthful of your skin sucked in to his mouth. Lifting you once more, he flings you over and softly lands you on the couch, laying atop your backside as you rest on your stomach and chest. “He–Heeseung…”

“Why was I so fucking blind…” his words gasped out in a near whisper, it was gentle and calm, yet the manner of his physical touch was the exact opposite. Nearly ripping off your dress, the straps snap loose as he roughly pulls it down, and tears your panties off. Hanging by the bits of thread and pieces of fabric, it loosely hangs on your thigh while he smooths his hands over the softness of your smooth skin, grabbing onto your cheeks firmly as he squeezes your derriere.

“Why did I not see what was in front of me?” Leaning forward, he places his lips on your back shoulder, and sucks on various regions. Firmly holding onto your waist, he fishes out his stiff member and rides it in between your cheeks, squeezing it to nestle in between as he strokes it up and down. “How could I not see that I had the best thing that’s ever happened to me?” Taking a hold on the back of your neck, he slowly feeds himself inside your cavity, pressing in. You weren’t entirely ready, and the lack of prepping made it hard for you to take him in, not to mention it had been so long. Yet his eager desire to have you made him impatient, he needed you now…he wanted you…he wanted to please himself but also, to please his queen.

“Why did I not show you just how much you mean to me….why didn’t i do it sooner?” Thrusting in hard, his groin smacks against the soft plumpness of your cheeks, you screamed out as he rams himself in, reaching the depths of your gut as he pushes through all of your stagnant walls. Fully in, he pauses before continuing. He had to take a moment to enjoy the feeling of burying his cock deep inside you….after missing out for so long.

“Why wasn’t I better for you?” Sliding out, his tip breaches its exit, providing you with some relief as you catch your breath, only for him to shove it back in with fierce momentum. “He–Heeseung!” Gripping onto the sofa cushion, you brace through the pressure of pain and pleasure as he roughs up your womanhood. He was being so demanding with the way he was thrusting, yet his words were so beautifully spoken with genuine sincerity and sympathy. He truly was sorry, and now, he wanted to show it, even if it meant he had to mix his love with fucking you into pieces.

“Why didn’t I tell you how I’ve felt all this time?” Thrusting, he jolts forward and bucks his hips, causing your body to rumble and shoot forward, only to be retracted back as he pulls you in, all to repeat his performance in jutting his cock back into you deeply, shiting your body forward.

“Why wasn’t I home often?” Thrusting and pumping his cock fiercely, you felt the sting of his thickness tearing you open. It had been too long, your body nearly forgot what it felt like to have someone, much less him, pelting you with their girth. Even though you were devotedly waiting for him, and yearned for him, he left you empty and unfulfilled so many nights, and you spent each evening alone and drifting off into a dream where you weren’t sleeping lonesomely on an empty bed. Now, he was here, and for the first time in so long, he was not only making love, but he was fucking you like his life depended on it. He didn’t want to take it easy, or slow, he wanted to go in deep and hard. He wanted his performance to match the ferocity of his love and yearning for you.

“Why did I let you sleep alone all those nights? I should have been there to kiss you to sleep.” Deepening his thrust, the curved edge of his lengthy member hits your sweet spot. Soon, there was no pain, only the pressure of pleasure and ecstasy.

“I should have touched you more.” increasing speed, he forces the moisture of your secreted fluids to squelch in and out. Your body gushes out, you could feel yourself releasing the warm liquid your body was producing, seeping out, and glazing his cock as he continues to fuck you.

“I should have loved you harder.” Grabbing onto both sides of your waist, he pumps his cock in and out, faster and faster as he holds you steady.

“I should have been better. I should have been so much better.” Slapping into you, his groin and thighs stains your skin red as he continues to slam himself in, going deeper and deeper.

“I should have….fuck….baby you feel so good…I should have…I should have….”

“Heeseung!! Ugh!” He continues with his pace as you reach behind and smack your hands over his, digging your fingers onto his wrists as you feel the snap in your gut release the high of your orgasm.

“Fuck baby….you’re making me cum…..”

Your body shakes uncontrollably and you scream out his name, which transitions into tiresome whimpers as you catch your breath. All the while he slows down, going in deep and slow, passionately slow. Admiring the view of his length smoothing in and out of your womanhood, he savors the feeling of releasing every bit of love, anger, sadness, and regret into you. Still thrusting, his thumbs stroke your skin and he bids you to answer.

“Tell me you missed me…”

“....I missed you…”

“Tell me you want me.”

“I want you…”

“Tell me you need me.”

“I need you.”

“Now tell me you love me….”

“....I love you….”

Leaning in, he rests his weight on top of you as he tenderly kisses your cheek. His cock remains buried in, and goes in deeper as he propels forward and lays atop your body. “Then turn around…and don’t let me go. I’ll do the same.”

Enjoyed this piece? Show love and treat your girl to a cup of coffee. ♥️

☕ Ko-fi: ko-fi.com/reinbow

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agentc0rn · 3 months

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What Pecharunt Teaches Us about Love

Ok the title sounds funny but, I just find something about Pecharunt so interesting and a bit tragic.

Pecharunt's expression of "love" is gift-giving; it showers the old couple with materials. To it, love is conditional and takes form in objects, or gifts to simply put. In order to be loved, it needs to grant the wishes of the couple. Love in a way can be transactional (gift-giving), but usually we understand that when you love someone, you don't really expect to have anything in return when giving them something.

It’s one thing to gift someone. Humans have done that all the time. But does love not always have to mean about the objects. Love is about the thoughts, the words, the time spent together, the memories, going through rough moments together, the actions other than gift-giving (hugging, singing, playing, talking, etc.). And the story mentions that the couple took care of Pecharunt, so there must have been moments where the couple genuinely cared for it without its influence.

Pecharunt's action distorts the goodness of love, which parallels the professor - their obsessions diverted them away from taking care of Arven. Their own selfishness conflated with their works of expressing love. Ironic, isn't it. (Disclaimer: love has different forms, but in this analysis, I am focusing on familial love and love in general).

We have a child who may have been spoiled rotten, but nevertheless loved and taken well by the parents, who wishes for their love and does fulfill their wishes, but in questionable ways that caused it to be separated from the couple by its own actions. We have a parent who works hard to make their dreams (their own childish dream with their dream of living with their son) come true, but at the cost of spending time with their son. Both depart from their loved ones to achieve a goal that would become reality for some time, but their efforts still end up in vain and would never make up the lost time that could have been spent with their loved ones.

Is it still really genuine love if you use questionable means to achieve so? Yes and no. The motivations behind the actions or methods can be truly love and well-intentioned, but can be still be morally wrong. Love is an interesting thing; it is a good thing that can be used for the wrong things.

Pecharunt's use of power (be it unknowingly or not is a different story) to influence in fulfilling both the couple's and its own desire - seems paradoxical - Pecharunt wants to be loved, so it gives more and more- it seems innocent/harmless yet selfish because it wants more despite being already loved.

It would be neat if we could go to the crystal pool, have Terapagos out again, summon the mist, and meet both or either one: the couple and the old man. On one side, the couple meets Pecharunt again, and tells it (this couple is from the timeline where Pecharunt has been gone for a long time), that they realized they never needed the mask, all they ever wanted was Pecharunt and for it to be happy.

On the other hand, Ogerpon meets the man again (obv before he got presumably killed), and we get to talk to him for some time. He thanks us for taking care of Ogerpon what not.

Treasure the moments, not just the materials. Because the materials can only mean so much if you forget about the memories you've created with others.

#pokemon sv #pokemon dlc #ac rambles #pecharunt #mochi mayhem #pokemon scarlet and violet #ogerpon #the teal mask #pokemon scarlet and violet dlc #pokemon sv dlc #why did I write an analysis on a PEACH #as Jack Black says: peaches peaches peaches #cause I love it too #as much as I loved the video #i honestly think it is a pecharunt propaganda LOL because it is momotaro tale after all-- but i still like that they give the other side #Also the fact that it loses to ogerpon rather than it beating ogerpon like in the original tale

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amoonalls · 1 year

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What I Have Learned About Men

1. The Way For Men to Choose or Chase You is By Them Putting You in Pedestal

The man has to see you as higher than him. I'm not talking about competing with a man, I'm talking about being better than man in something he could never do in this lifetime. And that's by being more beautiful and more feminine. Straight men won't be able to do that. Being smart and high achieving in career do work but this professional world is created for men. More often than not men are higher achiever than women. Then being prettier and more feminine is the thing you can do as a woman

2. It's Much Easier For You To Move On When You:

a. Giving Less or None to Men

When you are always in receiving end and you never make sacrifice for men, the only feeling you feel when you seperate with those men is some kind of regret or a lil lost cuz you used to have people do things for you but you no longer have that. But you don't have any kind of resentment because you lose nothing of your energy and resources. Look at those divorcee women or barbara the builder ex gf. What do they say when they crying about their loss? They always say "I did everything for him.. I was there for him when he was in broke and miserable, I paid for his tuition, I cleaned his house and now he left me for other women". You would never hear women crying and saying "I do nothing for him and he left me" cuz women do measure their emotional losses for how much they have given to men. But when men have given so much to you especially money.. you can break up with him thousand times and he will always want to come back. Men don't want to lose things and people they have invest in. You see tons of women have friendship breakup but you rarely see men having their bro breakup

b. Have Your Own Standard

The standard is not on specific person but on things. The standard is not Max but what Max have and do. The standard is not who Max is but how much money Max make and how much he gives to you. Loving someone for what they are is for woman not for man. For a man, partly you love them based on how much they give to you. So say that the standard is that you want a man that is able to give you like $2000 per month. That any man be it Max, Xavier, Dan that are able to give that to you will fall into that category. You can be hopeless romantic when it's toward yourself but when it's about man you have to be single focus. Doesn't care if a man has roster etc etc once the man has been proven to fulfill your standard, you go for that. And you may encounter men who fulfill your material standard but don't want you. Strong and confident women don't get insecure and have meltdown over that fact because as men's life get better their standard get better. Which is why I say there is more than just material standards. It also have to be emotional, mental, and genuine attraction and feelings toward you

3. Do Not Get Insecure On Things You Refuse To Do

So what? You get insecure of beautiful women a man follow on instagram but you refuse to work on yourself? You hate man for following sexy woman when you always keeping yourself look plain? Darling, do you think these sexy women will still be sexy if their feeds are contained with tnem wearing baggy clothes and with bed hair? Observe those women, they do everything to their looks and take the best efforts to take pics for them to be able to post a bombshell pic that a man like. Rather than being jealous toward those women, why don't you get inspired by them? Start observing what these women wear and how they take pics and do that to yourself while you find your best style. You can't hate on women who do so much to keep up with their looks when you are halfassing yourself. And these women have hella confidence for them to post their alluring pics on instagram. You can't be shy and stiff when being taken pic of and hoping it will come out as magnificent pic. Start being confident and post that then you will see you will care much less of those women you will never meet cuz you already become them

And why I use astrology tag? Because only Saturnian women learn about this. Saturn is brutal reality, love and romance are not just dreamy and beautiful things the whole dating can be harsh and cold and never be for faint hearted. Who is not the most perfect candidate to be able to tackle these challenges if it's not Saturnian women? They are accustomed for that. Which is why you see a lot of hypergamous women have prominent Saturn influences. Only strong women are able to tackle with those things when many people choose to be swept off by otherwordly love

#hypergamousblr #hypergamyblr #hypergamy #astrology #astro observation #aquarius #capricorn #venus square saturn #saturn in 7th house

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celticcrossanon · 3 months

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BRF Reading - 4th of February, 2024

This is speculation only

Cards drawn on the 4th of February, 2024

Question: Is Harry going to lose his Prince title in the next three months?

While I was shuffling the cards, I heard two sentences in my mind. One was of someone saying "I'm thinking about it, don't rush me" in a testy voice, and the other was a deeper, calmer voice saying "Sooner than you think". Make of that what you will. The testy, don't want to be rushed energy has carried over into the cards.

Interpretation: Something is coming for Harry, but I'm not sure exactly what.

Card One: Strength in reverse.

The Strength card is the card of Leo, and due to the picture on the Rider-Waite card it is sometimes taken as the Virgo and Leo/Harry and Meghan card. Here it is in the reverse, indicating that Harry and Meghan, the ones poking and wrestling with the lion of England, are going to fall even further than they already have and/or suffer a major defeat. This particularly applies to Meghan, as she is a sun sign Leo.

As a general card, Strength in reverse tells me that Harry is a coward, dominated by his wife, and lacking any significant inner strength or fortitude. He has abandoned his passions and lost everything that used to give him joy and a sense of purpose in life (if there was anything like this in his life). Instead he is just going along with what his wife wants, becoming more and more unhappy, and so spiralling downwards.

The card is also saying that Harry lacks the inner strength to do anything about his situation. He would rather wait for someone else to rescue him, like a damsel in distress, than face the unpleasantness involved in setting himself free. He is not a bold, courageous lion of England in any way - again, I am getting that he does not have a truly courageous bone in his body.

Card Two: The Ace of Pentacles in reverse

Pentacles are about material status, wealth, prosperity, the things of the body and of the world. The Ace signifies new beginnings or new opportunities. In the reverse, it is about missed chances, bad investments, scarcity and deficiencies.

This card is giving me the energy of Harry being stripped of some or all of his worldly status (and wealth). It's giving me hope that Harry will be stripped of his Prince title, but it is not saying that this is a done deal. Instead I am getting a variation of the energy that I got while shuffling the cards - we are thinking about it, it is not something to be rushed.

This new beginning on a lower status feels like it is under consideration. It may very well happen, but the energy is not quite at that point. Pentacles move very slowly, so this may be something that happens in the future, after the three month time period I put on this reading, or it may be something that is slowly coming into being.

If you look at the card, you can see that the pentacle is being held aloft by Poseidon, who is in a sea of water. Water represents emotions in the Tarot, so there are strong feelings about this matter and they are influencing the decision.

Card Three: The Nine of Wands in reverse.

The Nine of Wands is about making your last stand, making one last effort to achieve your goal. In the reverse, it is a card of giving up, of failing to achieve your goal. It can also be a card of being stubbornly set on something, or not making a commitment because you are afraid you don't have the resources to cope if something goes wrong.

This card tells me that Harry's last stand is over. The battle is lost. Whatever he is fighting for (and I'm not sure he knows what that is), it is lost, over, finished. All that is left for him is to recognise this and go somewhere to sort out what he is going to do next. Instead of this, he seems to be unable to realise that the battle is lost, and he is stubbornly insisting on continuing fighting and blaming those around him for his losses.

There is also a suggestion here that Harry is afraid of changing his ways because he thinks he does not have the money/resources to be able to do this, so he will continue on his current path even when everyone around him can see that it is hopeless.

Wands can be PR, but the only PR energy I am getting for this is to give up, retreat, and try to figure out a way to redeem yourself, if that is possible.

As a final note: The Nine of Wands can be a mental health card, and in the reverse it can indicate worsening mental health. I do think that this is the case with Harry, that he is becoming more paranoid and suspicious of people, but I also think that he is using his mental health as a weapon in his fight against his family, in a "if you do x I will do y and it will be all your fault" kind of way. I feel that this weapon is gradually losing its effectiveness, but it still carries some power when he uses it against the BRF. I also feel that this will not be the case for much longer.

Underlying Energy: The Two of Pentacles in reverse.

The energy of this card is of things being out of balance. Energy is being spent in areas that do not bring the hoped for return, and energy is not being spent in areas that would give a good return. This is the suit of Pentacles again, and Harry only has two of them left ( for me the two are his Prince title and his Duke of Sussex title). He is frantically juggling them trying to slot them in here, there, and everywhere, with the result that he has overextended himself and the value of these titles has gone down from many pentacles to just two.

I mentioned balance above. The juggler has lost his balance and the Two of Pentacles, instead of flying merrily through the air, have fallen on the floor and are rolling away from him. Reversals can mean things being taken away, so it is possible that Harry's Prince title will be taken away. The bigger energy is that of someone who has taken something that was perceived as valuable and cheapened it to brass because of their behaviour.

I believe this is how the BRF sees Prince Harry - as the Two of Pentacles in reverse, unbalanced, out of control, and dropping those pentacles they are juggling all over the place. That is the current situation and the question is, what are they going to do about it?

Conclusion:

All the cards in this reading are in reverse, which does not bode well for Harry.

I think that the BRF are currently discussing what to do about Harry and how long they are going to let him cheapen and tarnish his Prince title (and possibly his Duke title, but I didn't ask about that). They know he is a coward, that his reputation is spiralling downwards, and that he has no inner strength or resilience to bring himself back from this situation. They also know that he has tried and failed in what he set out to do. He has been defeated, the battle is over, and yet he stubbornly insists on keeping on fighting.

There is energy about the idea stripping him of one of his royal titles (reducing his pentacles from two to one), as if it is being considered, but I do not feel that it has come to a final conclusion. I think that what is stopping them is concern for his mental health, and I think that Harry is playing that card with them. I also think that the patience of the BRF is running very thin with Harry, and the time will come when they say we don't care what you are saying you will do, this is what is going to happen and that is it.

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002yb · 4 months

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I cried during your whole reply to the late ask. But please consider: Dick can't stand to look at Jaybin bc he feels too guilty and sad and he still thinks its his fault. And little jaybin is sad bc nothing has changed Dick still haces him no matter how much he loves him and Jason goes full mother on him bc a) he gets it, those are his feelings b) its a kid and Jason cant stand to look at a kid sad and c) if no one is looking out for him he might as well do. Damian is very !!!! Bc his position as jasons baby is in danger but also thats Jason as a *baby*. And Jason is just mothering two kids and Dick is taken out at the knees bc Jasons so perfect and protective and omG he wants to cry everytime he sees them. (Bruce is crying ln the corner and staring holes onto them) (Jason confronts Dick about making Jaybin sad and Dick cries)

Im so sorry this is so long but i got thoughts that i wanted to share bc your posts always make me happy<33 hope youre doing good and take it slow and one step at a time<3 love u<3

The angst potential from this angle of the double-Jay!AU, oh dear. It hurts in a different way from this post. But yes, let's explore:

Where Jaybin is so excited to see what's become of the future. He's eager to see how his small family is doing and if it's grown, what all Batman & Robin have achieved - what Jason has accomplished. More than anything, he wants to know that all their efforts have made a difference for Gotham.

Needless to say, Jaybin is left...unmoored, for lack of better words.

Because everything is wrong.

Bruce won't look at him. Dick still avoids him. Gotham is still fucked up. And just - Jaybin is welcome in the mansion, but it doesn't take a detective to realize that future Jason is estranged because everyone hates him, too

And ughhh, Jaybin trying to mend those burned bridges because he's alone and without proper support, but it's like he's a ghost

So, because Jaybin knows that it must be his fault, he singles out Jason. Without really understanding what happened, Jaybin blames himself and tells Jason to fix it.

Because Jaybin wants his dad back. He wants his family.

Jason being blindsided by 'his' upset feelings although they're nothing new. He's sat with them for years. No one understands more than him how fucking bad this grief hurts.

But Jason is Jason and while he feels a compulsion to help, the subject matter strikes him dumb temporarily

So Jaybin grieves because he can't understand what went wrong. Something something, he lashes out and says some cruel things about how they should just die

And that's what Damian overhears and like. This boy does not take kindly to the cruelty.

There's a Damian/Jaybin throwdown that finally snaps Jason back into action. He separates them and sends Damian off with a promise to tend to him later, but for now - Jaybin

With Jason patching Jaybin up. And them having a bit of a heart to heart.

Where Jason hears out everything that's bothering Jaybin and answering as patiently/kindly as he can. Things with Bruce? Can't fix that. Gotham? Work in progress. Bat methods are a joke, so he's trying his own thing.

And Dick?

What about him?

Jaybin kicking out his leg and grumbling about how Dick still hates them. He avoids Jaybin like the plague.

Jason being surprised at that. While it made sense back in Jaybin's timeline (something Jason has begrudgingly come to understand), Dick seems the sort to capitalize on a situation like this. Jaybin is, objectively, darling. And easily teased.

Jason grumbling about how Jaybin must have that crush by this point in time, huh?

Jaybin flustering because what? No. Shut up.

Jason snickering, then getting melancholic and soft. He shrugs and admits nothing comes of it. Better to give it up.

Have you?

It's the biggest call out.

It's not something Jason is dealing with, so he slaps a bandage on Jaybin's face and goes to tend to Damian

Which leads to sleepovers at Jason's flat. Where Damian bristles like a territorial cat because Jaybin is encroaching on Damian's Jason/space/etc. The only reason Damian behaves himself and begrudgingly looks after Jaybin is because Jason requests it of him. Damian definitely isn't happy about it though.

Which leads to a whole other side plot of Damian learning about who Jason was before he grew to be what he is. And Damian recognizing qualities he really loves about Jason in Jaybin, but also the differences. Like how all Jason's jagged edges aren't yet so piercing. Jaded, but not yet wrecked.

And of course Damian falls in love with Jason all over again contemplates his discoveries to Dick. Who is fondly reminiscent because he remembers well and sees it all, too. ;U;

But what's more? Dick recounting stories of the sparse times Jason and he were together. Damian noticing how Dick is so soft and melancholic and regretful.

Which, like - just hang out with him? Jaybin is here. Now's the time to make things right.

Which Dick is adamantly against because he's of the mindset that he'll make things worse. He always does with Jason. And Damian is fully just l: because really, Grayson? Pathetic. He wasn't there before; be there now. If Damian knows anything with any certainty, it's that Dick is unashamedly relentless. Is Damian wrong? )<

More than anyone, Damian knows the importance of Dick just…showing up. So.

Which leads to Dick asking Jaybin to go on patrol with him.

Needless to say, Jaybin, Jason, and Damian are dumbstruck because what

Jason and Damian? Jealous af (though Jason bites his tongue while Damian spits and sputters because he's Robin, damn it). Jaybin though? Starry eyed with the most brilliant of smiles

Commence a lot of Dick and Jaybin bonding as Dick steps up in the way he couldn't before. All while Jason and Damian get all huffy and petulant in the background.

But it's cool because Jaybin invites Dick over for dinner at Jason's one night. Which forces Dick and Jason to spend time together in a domestic capacity. But before that:

Dick being let inside the flat by Jaybin. And Jason peers around the corner to the kitchen because who the fuck?

His eyes going wide because wtf is Dick doing here?

'Whatever it is - it wasn't me.'

Which makes Dick grimace because he's not here on a case, Jaybin invited him

Jason being all wary because that's just how things are at this point. Still, he lets Jaybin have his company. It's fine. It's whatever. Jason was cooking extra anyway.

And yeah, something something Dick watching Jason be a caretaker

Dick minding his own business before Damian kicks him beneath the table and glowers at him because: 'don't get any ideas, Grayson.'

To which Dick is !! because what? No! No, no.

It's just surprising/disarming/sweet, is all. Dick's never seen Jason in this capacity. //3///

And yes. More dinners. Family patrols. Dick being brought more into the loop and Jason begrudgingly allowing Dick into their family unit space. Something something, Dick running errands after work or bringing home food. Everyone going out for some outings. Joint patrols. Just strong family vibes that heal all of them, tbh. ;U;

#dickjay #jaydick #jason's first love is dick grayson

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gyuluttony · 4 months

Text

So, that Ateez feederism bug has certainly taken root and I couldn't tell you why exactly. (It's because I finally am getting a feel for how many people like it as much as I do 👀)

And with that being said, I want to write about another one of my ults, being San... it's not going to have a fixed pair... but that doesn't mean he can't play around hehe

Better

This is a feederism fic and features weight gain, weight gain denial, breaking of clothes, and smut. Don't like, don't read.

Finishing his set in the gym, the sound of the weights clanging on the machine as it settles. He's panting as he looks at himself in the mirror. He's come a long way since he started working out. He remembers the first time that he set foot in the gym and how just about everything intimidated him. Flexing his figure, he couldn't help but feel a sense of pride as a result of just how far he's come. It wasn't something that he achieved overnight after all. Lots of effort had to be made to get his body to the level that it was currently at.

While he washed up, some things came to mind. Like there were people who might have struggled with the idea of going to the gym for the first time and plenty of questions that they had. As he lathered up his firm pecs and broad shoulders, it was properly occurring to him that he had a rather amazing set up. The gym was owned by his friend, Yeosang, which meant it would be fairly easy to set up a camera and record beginner guides to helping out those who needed the advice. While he rinsed off, his mind was already buzzing with ideas as to what he'd need to mention with Yeosang if he wanted to get the go-ahead on this idea.

In his mind, as long as he delivered his advice to a level that was befitting of the audience, it shouldn't be too hard to get the information out to everyone who needed it. He arrived at his apartment as he announced, "I have the best idea ever."

Wooyoung had flopped his head over on the couch to look at him, an eyebrow raised curiously while Seonghwa paused the game that he was playing to look at him. "Oh, how was the gym, Sannie?"

He simply gave a thumbs up before he sat on the coffee table in front of them to look at them eye to eye, almost like he needed to be at that level to brace them before his idea properly blew them away. "You're not ready for this."

Seonghwa kept his encouraging smile on his face while Wooyoung looked at him, a little exasperated, "What is it? You've hyped it up but haven't said it yet."

San paused for dramatic effect for a moment before he stated, "I'm gonna start a channel to promote fitness for first timers because they don't know what they're doing and Yeosang already gave me the go ahead."

There was a pause in the air before Wooyoung just sighed as Seonghwa politely began to play his game again, ready to listen as background noise, almost like his interest had pulled away.

"What?" San looked genuinely puzzled as to why the attention had waned.

"No offense, San, but I think I've seen about a thousand channels like that where they all advertise their advice. It's just oversaturated and almost everyone does it." Wooyoung rips the bandaid off rather easily and it's hard not to deflate a little.

He pouted rather easily, "It's a great idea! I didn't get like this without knowing my way around the gym so I think I'm pretty trustworthy!" The way that he flexes while having a cute expression flusters both of his roommates as Wooyoung openly gawks the muscles on display while Seonghwa pays closer attention to the game that's on the screen before pausing it when San seems to wait for them to comment again.

"Wooyoung does have a point, Sannie." It's hard not to coo at the sight of San being more pouty than expected as his plans are stepped on but Seonghwa continues, "But, I think you'd be able to carve a niche as you are. You do a pretty good job of that." He can't help but smile as he blushes at the kind words of the older one at that.

A pat on the shoulder comes from Wooyoung, "If you need someone to film, I'll be happy to help. I feel like you'd be bad at setting up shots." He raises a fist, threatening to hit his friend before muttering that he'd appreciate the help.

After a little bit more planning, the first video goes without a hitch and he can't help but feel a pit in his stomach as he watches the video process before it slowly uploads on their shared Internet. Both Wooyoung and Seonghwa are in the room as moral support when it finally finishes and he can't help but stew.

A couple of minutes go by and San whines, "I really put a lot of time into this introduction! Even Hongjoong helped me with editing everything in a nice way!" The video looked rather professional and not amateur at all thanks to the older man's touch that San promised to repay him for at dinner one day.

Wooyoung patted him on the shoulder comfortingly, "You can't expect everything on day one, San. It'll take some time." He left him in the room with Seonghwa who seemed to smile encouragingly, "Yeah, it already has about fifteen views now so that's more than just our friend group. Give it some time to settle!"

Even if he was going to heed their advice, it didn't mean he wasn't going to bed sulking... but when he woke up that morning, the fact that his phone was warm and currently buzzing with notifications was a cause for alarm. Looking at it in shock, all of his friends were sending him various links of different edits of him in the video that went viral.

He knew that he looked good but seeing people editing him to shreds while basically making thirst traps of what he had said was incredibly kind to his ego. He felt himself blush while reading the various comments that were left. Was there such a thing as digital footprint with what some of these people were saying? Either way, it didn't take long for his channel to blow up and thanks to his work with Hongjoong, he didn't need to completely rely on him for editing and knew how to do it for himself.

Everything was panning out. He received sponsorship and just about everything under the sun that came with being a successful content creator and it wasn't hard at all for him to stick out in the crowd. A few lingering shots on his body here and there and it would inspire someone to make another edit that would go viral. Even if a lot of people weren't there for advice, it was the views and fans that made him go viral which he vastly appreciated.

Before long, brands were starting to sponsor him. Athleisure clothing brands, various different services and he took a good majority of them. San hadn't had this much money forever even working full time. But, then, he received his largest sponsorship deal yet. It was a formal process. Signing with Fever Supplements, he would have an exclusive deal that would pay more than enough for him to cover his rent on his apartment alone for each month.

All he had to do was take their products and be causal about mentioning it. And considering he was already in the stage to start taking protein again to bulk for the winter, it wouldn't be hard. Plus, their pre workout had tasted amazing from his experience.

At the stage that he was at, he was starting to workout with guests because he knew that the edits seemed to get a lot more traction when one of his friends was in the gym with him. So far, Jongho, Mingi and Yunho had accompanied him before. Today, Mingi had come with him.

Watching San shake his drink shaker made him raise an eyebrow curiously, "What's that? It looks different than what you usually drink." The camera wasn't recording while they were still in the middle of warming up. San liked to record during stretches so that they could have more to capture. Mingi raised an eyebrow as San offered it.

Watching him take a sip and recoil, Mingi looked at the drink in surprise, "Woah... that's really sweet. Are you sure it's pre?" San shrugged, "It says it's pre workout on the container and I think it's their new flavour. It's pretty good though. It's been energizing me for a couple of weeks now before my workouts." Mingi looked at it rather suspiciously before he added, "Damn, I can see why. It wakes you up."

They usually assist each other in stretching and when it comes time to work with each other, San feels his waist intruded on by Mingi, large hands resting on his sides and for some reason, sinking in slightly as San yelps. "Isn't it early for bulking season?" Mingi snickers as San raises a fist, "Like you're one to talk." He pokes Mingi's softened middle who covers his stomach shyly before they continue.

It makes a sort of tension that persists through the video as San noticed how his friend had put on. It's not like he put that much on though. The fabric of his shirt was clinging to him but that's how most compression shirts fit. On Mingi, it was bulging a little at the stomach and he couldn't help but find himself staring.

While they were in the shower, Mingi's voice was clear through the constant stream of water, "Uh, San. Would you be able to hook me up with some of that pre? It really worked and I just had a sip." Blinking a couple of times in surprise, he looked at Mingi, "Really? All you had was a sip." Mingi shrugged nonchalantly before he added, "That's the best I've worked out in a while... but I still have some energy. How about you?"

The words hung in the air for a moment, the tension only growing more intense before San added, "Yeah. I could do some more." He wandered over to the other man before he saw the way that he moved his neck downward and pressed their lips together. Naked bodies were pressed into each other as the water continued to clean them of everything but their desires.

The perks of the semi-private gym were making their way to the surface now as they stroked each other. Doing anything else was a little riskier even if they knew they had the space to themselves because the staff needed to clean soon for the actual hours of the place. What San was noticing was the fact that Mingi's stomach which had been flat the last time he appeared in a video seemed to protrude and inflate when he breathed out in pleasure at San's touch that was threatening to make him come undone. Had he put on weight since then? Maybe his next video needed to be something about weight loss. But, his thoughts were wiped clean as Mingi moved down and began to suck him off. Clutching the railing, his fingers curled in his friend's hair while he made sure to show attention to just about every inch of his length. As much as Mingi ran his mouth, he always knew how to use it just as well which is why they hooked up as often as they did.

As they both helped each other wipe off the mess after experiencing a release, San's stomach growled. "Damn, you're that hungry?" Mingi slaps his friend on the ass, who yelps before he says, "If you want, we can grab some food with Yunho. He wanted to eat with me today anyways."

Another thing that he didn't realize following his sponsorship with Fever was the fact that he was hungry a lot more often. He didn't really notice it because most of the time, he did his own meal prep. But, San seemed blissfully unaware of how the portions of these preps had slowly been increasing everytime. Where it used to be properly be one portion, it was getting to the point where he would eat portions of three for just about every meal.

Whenever he ate out with friends, it was more absurd that he ever would have noticed. Yunho had noticed that Mingi was eating a fair bit as well but San's order nearly filled up the table. He looked curiously as the two stuffed their faces with everything that was bought. "Good workout?"

The pair nodded before going back to stuffing their faces as Yunho watched, feeling his face heat up as he watched Mingi beside him belch before he continued to eat his own food.

From this point forward, just about all of his friends were noticing the amount that San was eating as he continued to increase the portion sizes slowly but surely. Seonghwa noted that he was cooking just about every other second when he was at home and the planned meals were filling the fridge. Wooyoung had tried some of the protein shake that he mixed but felt full a quarter of the way through while San had started to drink two per day. Mingi was starting to become a regular on the channel and those little meals where they would spend nearly two hours eating were becoming a near daily occurrence that San could afford with no difficulty thanks to his income.

However, the strangest part to just about everyone that knew San was the fact that he didn't even notice what all this food was doing to his body. He was under the impression that with Fever Supplements, he was going to bulk. But, following the winter, what he hadn't done was bulk. He had grown beyond the word bulking.

What Mingi was after the influence that San had on him was chubby and even that was being nice. He was definitely lingering closer to fat these days. But San? San had gotten properly fat and was starting to border on obese.

Gone were the broad and defined shoulders that he had launched the channel with as they were replaced with rolls on his back and flabby moobs that were starting to hang with how much fat that they had blown up with. His stomach protruded out so far and his roommates could hardly believe he poured himself into skin tight clothes without breaking them.

Although, Seonghwa remembers one day where he had checked in on San because he had stated that he was going out to eat with Mingi, not even going to the gym this time. Wandering in his room after hearing some noises, Seonghwa gaped at the sight. San was hopping and just that alone was shaking the floor as the massive amount of fat he put on was jiggling as he tried to get himself into a pair of jeans that didn't even make it halfway up his thighs.

San turned his head, panting as Seonghwa noticed more closely that even his jawline that was sharp had blurred and was even starting to develop a double chin just naturally. He couldn't figure out why it was exciting him to this degree. "Ah... hyung, perfect. Can... you help me close these? I think I bulked up too much."

Seonghwa felt a shiver run down his spine as he moved to San. Placing his fingers on the sides of the pants, he gulped feeling his hands press into the soft cellulite on his thighs. Pulling it up was a lot of effort and even more difficult at the fact that San didn't realize how much he was jiggling at just about every desperate movement. They managed to make it up to where they should rest but were presented with the next problem.

The button.

Now, Seonghwa was seriously going to overload at the feeling of his knuckles pressing into the underbelly of San's fat gut while he tried to make the two ends reach. He had tried lying down and sucking in. "Is it easier now?" He wheezed out the question while Seonghwa was praying for how aroused this was making him. His hands brushed San's crotch a couple of times and he heard a couple of whimpers from his fat roommate before he made his advances less coy, placing a hand on the area. It had gotten fatter too given how he knew San's length was a lot more plentiful the last time they hooked up.

San mewled in pleasure when Seonghwa's hand slipped into his pants, starting to please him before he realized that with just about every pump that caused San to move his hips, his gut would move too and make it more difficult to stroke him between the pressure of the tight underwear and his belly moving into his erection. San was losing himself to the pleasure of the feeling but still so horribly unaware of the point that he's blown up to.

They continue on before San releases, soiling his underwear as they both try to catch their breath. The last thing Seonghwa says before he leaves was that he should just wear something comfortable if he's going to out to eat with Mingi.

He does listen and when Seonghwa leaves the room, he's pulled into Wooyoung's room. On his computer screen, he sees orders for clothes identical to what San has in his wardrobe, just to replace everything with proper size ups. Seonghwa can't help but blush when Wooyoung reveals that this isn't the first time that he's done this before but he has San's card and he's gotten enough funding to the point he can pay it off without glancing at what's being bought.

It became an experiment basically. Just how massive could San get without noticing just how much these supplements were doing. Yunho had looked at the label and saw appetite stimulant and bulking formula on just about every product and weight gain enhancers in nearly everything that San mixed into his drinks. Mingi had grown at a slower pace but because he was with San so often, the damage had been done to the other gym goer as well.

The thirst edits of San hadn't changed. In fact, they had only steamrolled alongside his weight. Now, instead of focusing on his muscles, they focused on how strong his arms still were while they jiggled with fat when in between sets. How his belly spilled out of various workout shirts and how plump his ass was when he turned around while doing something. The fans were just about as ravenous as the one they were making these edits for and he didn't pay it any mind because it was still about his body.

In his eyes, he just viewed it as light pudge... even if he was getting to the point where his fattened form was knocking things over with either his belly or ass whenever he was at home.

He had reached a large milestone after almost a year. Over five million subscribers to the channel. In this time, he put on more than double his weight and didn't even bat an eye to the changes, which is still what shocked the other men the most. Didn't even think about how he couldn't fit in booths at restaurants or how difficult it was to do his stretches with Mingi when they were both of massive proportions. Their shower room hook ups had gotten a lot less subtle with all the bulk and San being teased about how much he had put on.

But, that wasn't the focus. He was finally treating Hongjoong to a meal that he promised. He had started to do a lot of the editing himself, so in the groove that he didn't even bat an eye at the way his sides were pressed against the arm rests of his desk chair most of the time. The editing style was retained and Hongjoong was rather proud of the younger man.

He hadn't expected the shorter man to choose an all you can eat restaurant as their destination. "Ah, hyung~ If you eat here, you'll get bigger~" San teased rather easily as Hongjoong's eyes scanned the massive man as if he could talk. He wasn't the slimmest person, carrying a small belly but it's not like he had grown to the size that Mingi had gotten to and San was an entirely different beast. He heard from the rest of their friends that he was unaware but he didn't think it was this crazy.

The two sat down at the booth as Hongjoong said, "Sannie, just let me grab what you want. You might be treating me today, but we're celebrating you too! You're probably the most popular fitness creator out there." It took a lot to not laugh at the sight when he said that. The most popular fitness creator being the largest person in the room, who's gut was pressing into the table and even resting on it where it protruded.

San smiled, "If that's what you say, hyung. I'll be sure to eat well." He had no doubts that the younger had been doing that for months at this point but today would be a proper test. Plate after plate was brought to the growing influencer as he stuffed his face just as well as he promised.

The clothes that his roommates bought for him could only do so well after the third upsize and around the seventh plate, San felt a relief in pressure as his gut expanded and pushed the table off balance for a moment. Hongjoong grabbed it in a panic as he heard the button rattling on the floor.

San looked flustered as he finally took in his body and how everything had settled on him. This wasn't just winter weight. In fact, it was the middle of the next fall. He had gotten so fat that he had broke his clothes. His fattened hands found his gut as he rubbed it, a small groan leaving him as he belched loudly, feeling his face flush from the people around staring at the gluttonous display he had put on.

He squirmed in his seat as he realized his ass needed two chairs to properly rest in them. Looking at Hongjoong who was equally as flustered by the sight, San whined, "Hyung, can we go to your place? I didn't mean to make a mess like this..." There was embarrassment bubbling up in his tone but all of his friends knew that was something that he enjoyed. He just didn't ever expect it to be in this way.

Even in Hongjoong's car, he was more aware of how it dipped and groaned when he sat in it, his belly filling up the space between him and the dashboard as he tried to relieve the pressure that had built up within it. Once they arrived at Hongjoong's apartment, Hongjoong pressed against him into the wall as San groaned while a burp bubbled up. "Oh, Sannie. How did you just realize this now?"

San felt his face flush while Hongjoong's hands explored his ample body, squeezing his moobs and getting a whimper from the younger. "You keep working out but when you're stuffing your face like that everyday, it's just barely keeping you strong." He still had muscles but the chub all over his body was more overwhelming than anything else. Each inch that Hongjoong pinched was a reminder of how he had let the supplement properly take effect and blow him up.

"I still am strong... I thought it was just bulking and-" He groaned when he felt Hongjoong's hands cup his ass and lift it, feeling the heft to him while he relished in the feeling. "This is more than bulking, Sannie. You're fat."

Hearing it plainly made a shiver run down his spine. Was that why he was having so much trouble to do certain things? Was that why people were referring to him as big guy? Was that why when Wooyoung rode him the other week, he only got his hands on his belly and he couldn't even see his own dick when looked down?

Hongjoong squeezed his crotch as they moved to his room, a mix of fat, desire, and pleasure to describe their bodies while they made out. A couple of times where Hongjoong leaned on his gut and got a burp out of the younger to his embarrassment before they continued, stripping each ill fitting layer away from San before he ended up with his ass pointed and his gut pressed into the mattress.

It oozed in just about every direction as Hongjoong inserted a finger, prepping San to take him. He had gotten so massive that Hongjoong, even with his chubby form, felt so much smaller. He was feeling his thighs mashing his fat pad into his underbelly as he rocked back and forth with Hongjoong's preparation of him.

He moaned when feeling Hongjoong enter him, his small belly resting on San's overly softened back as he pumped back and forth, sending ripples into his overfed body. San might have had all these fitness sponsorships but he had grown to a size where he was getting off better from his body humping his fat than properly being fucked and it was only skyrocketing his enjoyment.

It didn't take long for him to finish with how much his dick pressed into his underbelly as he released with a shout and panting to catch his breath while Hongjoong thrusted deep into him, clutching him by the love handles to get a better grip and reached his own ending soon after.

San lied down, flopping onto his back, watching his belly expand and eliminate the view of anything past it feeling himself grow harder again. Hongjoong admired the sight while he lied down next to him, rubbing his belly to help the younger digest after both the food and the pleasure that had just run through him.

A single question filled the air.

"Hyung, what if I put on weight intentionally?"

Insatiable for more was a good way to describe him but he liked himself getting this fat... and it would only get better if he did it on purpose.

#kpop feederism #atz feederism #gyuluttonous behaviour #chubby san #weight gain fiction

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shadowgale96 · 11 months

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AU where Sixty was captured rather than killed. In the aftermath of the revolution, he's being detained at the DPD for abducting a police lieutenant, holding him against his will, and attempted murder.

He is confined to a cell as they try to determine whether Sixty was an object used in a crime perpetrated by Cyberlife (since he had yet to deviate) that should be held as evidence, if he should be considered an accomplice to a crime as androids are now legally considered citizens rather than objects, or if he should remain in lock up as a threat to those around him for committing these crimes as easily as he did despite Cyberlife being under legal obligation to put safeguards in all their androids that prohibit them from using firearms and acting outside the law in the first place.

Sixty's detention is a legal disaster.

Despite everything that went down at Cyberlife tower, Connor still comes to visit Sixty in his cell. Connor knows that Sixty was merely obeying his directive. (A directive also being investigated into thoroughly because Cyberlife either instructed and permitted Sixty to break the law, or their lack of safeguards over the Amanda AI allowed her to instruct androids under her surveillance to commit crimes. Which is a whole other legal mess that gives Hank a migraine.) Connor remembers all the paths he could have taken to accomplish his mission. Many of them weren't legal either. Logically, it makes sense that Sixty would act more callously after studying Connors memories and seeing that empathy led to deviancy. So of course Sixty would harden his heart and act ruthlessly to achieve his goal.

But now Sixty is deviant. Androids were gradually gaining rights. And Connor doesn't think it's fair to keep Sixty locked up for something he did before he was able to truly choose. So, he advocates for his release, and visits him in his cell everyday he's in the station until he can be freed.

Sixty, on the other hand, isn't exactly pleased about Connors frequent visits. Connor reminds him of his failings at the tower, his failing of Amanda, his failure to achieve his mission. He was supposed to be the one to correct Connor's shortcomings. He's grateful to be alive, sure, but he isn't sure what to make of his life now. Part of him knows he shouldn't hold it against Connor, but he can't help but feel resentful of Connor. Resentful that he can even FEEL because of Connor. Frustrated that Connor wasn't defective, he was alive. He keeps making the right calls even though Sixty doesn't know what right or wrong is anymore.

So, yeah Sixty's not exactly pleased to see Connor everyday, but in his own way, he doesn't exactly want his visits to stop either. Because Connor is probably the only person in the entire world that truly understands him. And Connor's currently the only friend he has in his four-walled existence.

During the visits, there's friction between them, but there is also companionship.

Eventually, Sixty is released. In no small part due to Connor's efforts. He should be grateful, but he's just frustrated. So maybe he snaps at Connor. Tells him that, being an RK800 model, he is just as capable as him and doesn't need Connor taking care of him. Much to his annoyance, Connor doesn't retaliate but lets him vent his frustrations.

Connor tells Sixty he is glad he's now free to go his own way. He's sorry for what happened between them and hopes that one day they might be able to start over. Connor sends over information on android housing as well as work that might pique Sixty's interest being related to their skill sets.

They part ways for the time being. Connor gave Sixty his contact information if he needed anything, much to Sixty's annoyance. When Sixty left the DPD he had no idea where he'd go. But he'd find his way.

He thought of Connor a lot in the following months. Wondered if Connor thought of him. Eventually, he'd reach out. But he needed time to grow. As well as to heal.

#dbh #rk800 #rk800 60 #rk800_60 #dbh sixty #dbh connor #detroit become human #kinda a short ficlet #fic #dbh 60

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reyboris · 9 months

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ASTRO NOTES (LINDA GOODMAN)

My favorite quotes from linda goodman about the signs taken from her book SUN SIGNS (PART 1)

ARIES: Actually, Aries kids can learn anything in no time, never forget it, and zip through school like the wind, if they apply themselves. But not all parents know how to achieve it. It is possible that they spend years wondering why Miguelito and Margarita get such a high IQ on tests, and yet they have been in third grade for four years now. They don't need to worry too much, however, because Miguelito and Margarita will make up for lost time with the speed of a bullet, as soon as they get out into the world and realize that people are more alive than they are. A couple of humiliations, and the ego of a Martian will drive them to such an effort that they will jump several rungs in one jump.

GEMINI: his true character, despite his superficial cordiality, is lukewarm, withdrawn and ultimately lonely; Although he often seeks company, what he is really after is something that is inside him. However, he is not surly. His way of being can be warm and compassionate, but at the same time he offers his sympathy and understanding in the same way that he offers love and friendship: from a distance.

VIRGO: The fresh, green jade and the purity of platinum are the complement of him and what brings him luck. But Virgo's good luck is always followed by five kinds of loneliness, and the call of duty is never quite silent in his heart.

LIBRA: Not even Solomon in all his wisdom could overcome the final balance of a typical Libra decision. What he has no inclination to consider the personal nuances or emotional tangles that may lie below the surface. He is enough with the facts and he does not need more. In his judgment, the deep insight into character that a Pisces, Scorpio, or Aquarius might display would cloud the clarity of the picture he sees. He instinctively feels that those psychological depths are not his line, and it is true.

AQUARIUS:She Every once in a while she'll come off the hook with a surprisingly moving line. If you ask her what he thinks of space travel, she will answer: "When I was little, I believed that the stars were holes in the sky, through which light passed." But if she's in a different mood, when you tell her you're sad to see that melting snowman, she'll reply, "That's just sentimental nonsense, Charlie." First romantic, then practical; first shy, cheeky later. The Aquarius woman will ruthlessly mock flying saucers, only to later tell you that she has seen a gnome dressed in red dancing on the windowsill.

TAURUS: don't be fooled by the good disposition of Taurus or his compliance with his superiors: it is not easy to take him ahead. The Bull has a kind of Machiavellian detachment towards those who believe they are manipulating him, which allows him to deal with them with tact and subtle diplomacy. But if he looks closely, you'll see that he has a sly expression on his face and a sideways glance as he humors these aggressive people who try to lead him where they want. Ultimately, the Bull will get his way, and his success is further ensured by his ability to wait as long as it takes to win over the hasty. However, when his personal emotions are trampled on or his deep pride is hurt, his calm may disappear, and be replaced by childish stubbornness.

CANCER: They're not the kind of limelight people like extroverted Leos or clowning Sagittarius, but Cancerians have a terrifying sense of publicity, when it comes to being noticed. Don't be fooled by that apparent modesty. They secretly like attention, and will be intoxicated by whatever headlines they can get. You won't find Cancer pursuing fame with a passion (there's nothing he pursues with true passion), but rest assured, he won't run from it either. It will be easier to see him warming up to the heat of the applause than running away from them. There may be things that Cancer hides from, but recognition is not one of them.

LEO: Leo is extremely cunning, in many ways. It will be rare to see him waste energy trying to extract water from a depleted well, as Aries often does; he is therefore an excellent organizer and wise distributor of obligations. His commands are surprisingly effective when he controls the dramatic effects, for the Lion can be a master of the art of simple and direct speech, even if he sometimes smacks of theatrics. He freely and openly expresses his approval, and his flattery can be so exaggerated as to confuse one.

CAPRICORN: one day, your little Capricorn will comment like who doesn't want the thing that he wants to go to school early to call roll. "And why do you have to call the roll?", you ask. The answer will astound you. "Oh, I'm just class president." When you want to know why he didn't tell you, he'll reply with careless modesty, "Wow, it's not such a big deal." However, he will be flushed and satisfied: it will be his adult life style of behavior.

PISCES he is a mystic at heart, and secretly believes in the invisible and the supernatural, although he may be a little ashamed of it. He will not practice any voodoo rites at his desk or meditate in the lotus position next to the refrigerator, because he fears ridicule if people discover the undercurrent of his psychic vibrations. But they'll find out anyway, even if he tries hard to play the hardcore royalist.

SAGITTARIUS Most of the time, the typical Sagittarius is happy and gregarious, but his temper can go off like a rocket if he feels hassled by people who abuse his naturally friendly ways or get too close to him. Rebellions against authority and against an oppressive society are also common. Sagittarius will never dodge the bulge in the face of a fight or a request for help. Women are capable of losing their normally agreeable disposition to attack with the barrage of an unexpectedly serious speech that puts the impertinent in their place. Men will use their fists, disdaining weapons. It is not uncommon for the rude and insulting person who has played on Jupiter's good nature to find himself sprawled on the sidewalk, wondering where that change came from.

SCORPIO It is impossible to surprise them. Or rather, it is possible to surprise them, but it is not possible to detect it in the Scorpio's tone of voice, words or change of expression. There are two reasons for this; a) They are precognitive enough to guess anything ahead of us; b) When you catch them unawares, their factions are alerted, even though they are not. Scorpios take the fun out of everything. They make very unsatisfactory guests of honor at surprise birthday parties. Somehow the spark of spontaneity will be missing.

#astrology #astrología #astro notes #random astrology #astro observations #Aries #taurus #Gemini #Cancer #leo

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quinnkdev · 2 months

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Just wanted to say, I'm looking forward to when you write about why you stopped using RPG Maker 2003! It sounds like a very interesting read to me, as I myself eventually want to write about why I keep crawling back to it, ha! (It's mostly how it comes with the most out of the box compared to later RPGMs, whose scripting capabilities are useless if one doesn't feel up to learning the code... at that point I may as well start coding from scratch, which is exactly the path you seem to have taken, fittingly enough! It's not satisfying to try and master an RPG engine when know I can't do anything remotely cool with it without learning something completely different.. I boil it down to 'you can't make Yume Nikki with newer RPGM default tools', but I definitely want to expand more on the thought) I haven't had the time or energy to try any of your games yet, but I'm p sure we used to be in a Discord server together, and looking over periodically and seeing how much progress you've made has been really cool, so I'm excited to get around to trying them! Someday I too want to learn a proper coding language and move away from RPG Maker, but until then it gets the job done for me (especially with the recent Maniacs Patch mod that greatly expands what it can do).

Wishing you luck on your current project in the meantime!!

hey, i had this lying around in my inbox for entirely too long - and for that i apologise, i wasnt really sure who you were until i followed a context-cue from your blog to your art-stuff just now. good to have heard from you again, and no hard feelings :,)

rm2k3 is decidedly a development space that makes sense. hell, on the side, i am currently making a small game in it again with a friend (no ETA yet). something nice about a path of less resistence towards something neat youve been thinking about.

the maniacs patch is definitely something i took note of out of the corner of my eye (and in watching riggy2k3's streams on occasion), but having released two games in the engine on steam, i kind of dont think that i can take it on board as the future of my commercial game efforts.

as much as it hurts to admit, i cant think of game development as my fun art anymore - i have to sell the things i make in it now, and rm2k3 games arent very well equipped for that. they dont interlock well with steam, meaning you can't give players achievements or even let them take screenshots through the platform (something a lot of them are VERY unhappy about). that, and tons of QOL problems (one time, somebody refunded a game of mine because it was "too small, hard to see" - rather than realising there was a way to fullscreen it).

regarding yume nikki likes in newer rpg maker versions - i mean, id say "swollen to bursting until i am disappearing on purpose" by december 7th does an admirable job of being one made in rpg maker mv! but of course that one uses tons of plug-ins.

bottom line: programming isnt desperately needed if you primarily like making games for the fun of it (and seeing that you predominantly make fanworks, id wager thats your main objective! good! :] ). if you need to earn a living (like... me :( ) then you may have to bite the bullet.

#quinnterrogation

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deliciousdefendorinternet · 2 months

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some little story ideas I thought up about Chef coming back in the next movie inspired by this other persons post.

so yeah I liked this other person's idea for a 4th film a lot so I thought up some extra details for a possible story where Branch is taken by Chef who gets revealed to still be alive.

I do really like this idea as the older Brothers coming together to save him from his greatest fear would be a satisfying story arc.

as the movie could maybe open with Poppy Peppy and Viva as well as all of Bro zone all just playing happy families getting along with each other and adjusting to the whole thing pretty easily.

meanwhile Branch Despite putting on a fake smile and hiding how he feels is still just feeling uneasy about the whole thing he could kinda be on a constant nervous edge where he's so afraid of doing or saying the wrong thing and causing tension that may cause them to fight and thus leave him again.

that he's pretty much a nervous wreck around his Brothers desperately trying to make sure everything is perfect all the time and never asking them for help or letting them know about any negative feelings he has from time to time Regarding them and also Grandma.

and he overall just doesn't feel like he has a family he can rely on anymore than he did During all those years that he had no family for.

in short he just still doesn't exactly trust them nor feel comfortable around them as their still somewhat strangers to him who he mostly knows from the past as being unreliable and quick to flee when the going gets tough.

which maybe causes some sorta argument where during an event JD gets frustrated with how he and the others can clearly tell he's been hiding something from them due to how weird and off he acts.

and he's tired of waiting for him to open up on his own and like I said this causes a big argument between Branch and JD Floyd and Clay try to calm things down but to no Avail.

Bruce steps in and agrees with JD tho he's less aggressive about it and more just calm and concerned.

but ultimately stuff is said on both ends ending with Branch finally letting out his true feelings and screaming at them about how they didn't care enough to stick around they didn't care enough to come back and they didn't care even when he was upset over them wanting to leave him again.

so why should he believe that they care now? and Branch runs away into the Forrest which could be when he's captured by Chef.

I'd think her motive is wanting revenge not just on all of Pop Village but also on Bergen Town given they Banished her twice but she somehow needs the magic that a Troll produces to achieve her plan hence why she takes Branch when he wonders off on his own.

maybe she does something similar to Velvet and Veneer where she drains the Troll magic out of him but this time she's using it to power a device that she's going to use to topple all of Bergen town and its people.

and then Pop Village just out of spite.

and it'd be just be nice as a emotional plot to have Bro zone rescuing Branch from their Grandma's killer maybe we even get some parallels where during the climax Chef in a last ditch effort out of spite goes to try and kill Branch only for one of the older Bros either JD or Bruce.

to push him out of the way sacrificing themselves in a scene mirroring when their Grandma was taken when Branch was a kid tho I'd have it just be a fake out death and they get saved soon afterwards.

but point is the sentiment is the same where they were willing to sacrifice themselves for him.

and early on in the film it'd be good to finally have Branch acknowledge that he is aware it was Chef from that fateful day and he angrily comments on it only for her to callously not Remember who or what he's talking about stating that she killed so many Trolls that his Grandma wasn't at all special and she doesn't even remember the day he's talking about.

obviously Hurting and angering Branch given that day pretty much shaped who he became afterwards for his whole life.

and maybe in another scene Branch states to Chef that knows that Poppy will come to save him but when he thinks about his brothers he just thinks back to how easily they've all broken up in the past at the first sign of trouble and he sadly thinks to himself that they likely wouldn't bother coming to save him.

and this leads to Bro zone actually stepping up and Risking their lives to save him from the source of his greatest Trauma aka their Grandmother's killer thus by the end actually showing Branch that he really can trust his family to be there for him this time.

and just Chef getting to face off with Bro zone would be neat since ya know she killed their Grandma and Honestly I've always found it weird from a writing perspective how her being the one who killed Branch's Grandmother was never actually acknowledged at any point in the first movie the only reason we the audience know is a super brief glimpse we see of her During Branch's flashback scene.

so even getting to see Branch himself have a proper face off with Chef over his Grandma would be nice since they never actually Directly interacted in the first film except for the scene where she tried to force feed him to Gristle Jr poor guy.

so yeah what do you think about the idea? the person behind the post did also say that the idea could still maybe work without the whole Chef being Revealed to be alive angle and it instead just being a new villain who kidnaps Branch.

but I feel the first idea where she is the main villain again would add a nice sense of personal stakes to the story for the main characters involved given it wraps up a nice little part of the Bro zone family's History.

sure we saw her get eaten at the end of the first film but that can easily be Retconned where she somehow survived and was able to escape from the creatures mouth.

plus it'd be satisfying to see The Brothers all work together to defeat her in the final battle and this time her Defeat could be Ironic for a whole different reason where due to some magic nonsense in the end Chef gets shrunken down to the point she's now smaller than the Trolls by a lot.

she's made so small that she's as Helpless as her past Troll victims were.

and she isn't actually capable of hurting them anymore we see her angrily charge at Branch and start swinging away and he's scared at first only for him to then awkwardly Realise she isn't actually Hurting him.

Despite her best efforts and he just kinda flicks her away

not to mention it'd be fun seeing Branch and his Bros just playfully toss her back and fourth like some sorta ball kids play with.

really showing how none of them are afraid of her anymore not even Branch which would be very satisfying imo.

and after some mocking by Bro zone towards Chef they pick her up and toss her in a tiny cage where she's most likely kept in prison either at Bergen town or at one of the other Trolls Tribes since they most likely wouldn't want to keep her at Pop Village.

anyway I just love this persons idea I think Chef coming back would work great as an emotional plot device to Develop Bro zone's Relationship with Branch Further.

and it could expand on all of the Bros's Relationship with their Grandma a little further as well which would be nice.

what do you think?

#trolls brozone #brozone #branch #branch trolls #trolls dreamworks #trolls branch #dreamworks trolls #trolls #trolls 4 ideas #trolls 4 #trolls future ideas #Trolls 4 #Trolls Branch #Trolls Bro zone

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nagoo · 2 months

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I also wanted to ask something. What is Vincent’s place in the Snood AU? I’ve seen some art of him tagged with the snood au, but I couldn’t find anything that explains what he does. Is he a leader of the Naga cult or something? I was considering some involvement between him and Lucrecia, but I’m not sure how the timeline of that would work out. Could you explain this for me?

Vincent is very special in The Snood AU,, I am also the sort of individual who ships Sephiroth with Vincent, which im sure not everyone is crazy about, but alas, i simply cannot care. Vincent's involvement with Lucretia as such platonic in The Snood AU, but she does still play a role in how hes ended up with The Snood. The Snood himself is an actual Deity, but he is still very much artificially created here as well, a joint effort between the Goddess Jenova, and her two most trusted worshippers, Lucretia and Hojo. Jenova, having watched the mortals for so long, wanted more than anything, to know what it could be like, to have a family, something so intrinsically hers that would have come, and been created - not by her, but from her. Lucretia and Hojo were to help her. But where Lucretia's intentions were to achieve their goal, learn, and please Jenova, Hojo's ambitions were more corrupt. He DID want to create Jenova's son.. its just that he wanted him to replace her, under his control. Vincent's role in all this was as the person assigned to assist them. Vincent's Job wouldve been to retrieve the extremely rare materials needed for their experiments, and as such, when things got Hojo'd, Vincent would have been in the middle of the ocean, making his way back to deliver something. He would then have been juuuust barely far enough away to not die instantly from the initial effects of the conflict between Hojo and Jenova. That whole thing is its own loooong explanation, but basically, Vincent is the ONLY living thing aside from The Snood himself to have been alive that impossibly long ago, and the ONLY individual to actually truly remember and have experienced firsthand, what the world had originally been like, back when all the minor gods - and Jenova herself - were still alive. He is, for all intents and purposes, the oldest living thing on the planet; because he was literally around during the creation of The Snood! everything else would have been either destroyed instantly or would have died or gone extinct afterwards, but because Vincent just so happened to be at the one exact spot at the right time, doing the right thing in the right way without even realizing it, he survived to see what is basically an entirely new world built on the ashes of the old one. The Snood found him, dormant and fading away, sunk deep within an ocean cavern and has become incredibly attached. at this current point in time, The Snood hasnt yet learned all this however, as He has only recently found Vincent. As such, Vincent isnt a Snoodist, but he also isnt not a Snoodist - not a usual one, anyway. He is fond of The Snood, and just wants to help him be happy more than anything. The Snood is all he has left in a world he no longer recognizes, and Vincent is The Snood's only tie to a past that was taken from him before he had ever even finished forming. The Snood, despite his many adoring worshippers, is a very lonely creature, because he cannot relate to the mortals, and he has no peers among other gods because there arent any left; not even lesser ones, all of them wiped out before he even got the chance to leave the cocoon he was formed in. Though Vincent is not a god, he was able to have been alive to experience them to a degree no one else has, and has been alive long enough to be the next closest things as far as The Snood is concerned, even if only because of external side effects of The Snood's birth. There is so much that he just doesnt know or understand, and its overwhelming. it makes him anxious, but Vincent is quiet and calm, and it Soothes The Snood. The Snood fears constantly that now that Vincent is awake and no longer held in stasis. Vincent is just a mortal after all, and The Snood has been alive long enough to see many thousands of years worth of mortals come and go. But maybe He can find a way to keep him around...

#long post #Nagi's Snood AU #the deeper snood lore is very angsty #i never mean to write novels when i answer things #its just that i never know where to start because nothing makes sense without context hhhHHHHH

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transmutationisms · 9 months

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can you really chose to engage with a moralizing force without the values of that force having an effect on your decision? conversion therapy is an easier example to talk about because its more commonly understood as normative more than anything else (how could one choose conversion therapy without that normative pressure?). but honestly i think this is a feature of advice in general

totally fair question & for the record, this is a huge part of the reason i have more or less taken myself 'off the psychiatric grid' so to speak lol. there are basically two main reasons i'm still cautious about making a blanket judgment about the potential for therapy / other interventions to ever be useful as anything other than a normalising / moralising force.

first, it's just hard to sweep all of these things into one category with comparable consequences. even if we stick to 'drugs prescribed by a psychiatrist that you take on your own time at home', there's a world of difference between, say, stimulants and antipsychotics. both are prescribed because the psych is trying to make you 'normal' and 'functional' (able to work, compliant, &c) but stimulants are, like, fun, and for most people and usage patterns are relatively safe. i know lots of people who get them prescribed and then use them to various non-sanctioned ends; i have also done that extensively and have zero regrets. antipsychotics, on the other hand, come with a raft of incredibly harmful effects and long-term health damage, and don't even produce any kind of comparable pleasurable state. it's hard to imagine anyone actually freely choosing antipsychotics in a situation where they genuinely have no social or economic pressure to do so, and are given full knowledge of the risks they're taking on. like, it's hard to come up with literally any reason for these drugs to exist, or be prescribed or taken, besides violent efforts to make people 'act normal' and be employable and obedient. i think the analysis here always has to take into account these types of specificities—and again, all of this is still limited to the relatively optimistic case in which someone is prescribed a drug and is taking it at home, on their own time; a situation where someone is being eg forcibly injected in an institutional setting calls for a different analysis, and obviously psychiatry has lots of other methods of coercion and force at its disposal. when it comes to placing eg talk therapy into this sort of framework, it's also tricky because i do think this depends heavily on the individual practitioner. like, you raise a fair point that "person who gives you advice and guidance on your life and problems" is a position that inherently involves moralising elements—i think that's right. i guess my hesitation here is like, is there any possibility for a situation in which, in a radically transformed social context, certain talk therapy methods could be removed from the imbalanced doctor-patient relationship; used by choice of the suffering person; and aimed not at achieving a socially-defined state of 'normality' but as a way of giving both the person and their social support network the tools and communication base to live in whatever way the individual defines as best for them? it is possible that at this point i'm getting so speculative that this is not even a useful answer to the question!

second, and this is related to what i'm getting at in the last few sentences, i'm kind of working here off a comparison to any other medical speciality. medicine generally has immense power to do harm, & is frequently deployed explicitly as a way of defining, moralising, and enforcing 'biological normality' (canguilhem &c &c). yet, at the same time, it is true that people experience pain and disease and so forth, and that i firmly believe everyone should have free and full access to what health care exists to treat such problems. the challenge here is how we as communists ruthlessly critique the existing power structures and transform the provision of health care into a way of actually caring for people, prioritising their autonomy and their values for how they live their own lives, as opposed to enforcing a notion of 'good' bodies as a method of population management. i don't mean to suggest that there's no difference between psychiatry and other medical specialties; there is. yet it is also true that affective suffering is real, and although i think much of it is worsened or directly caused by living in a world that actively saps human life-activity for the sake of reproducing capital, i also think that in a full communist utopia people would still experience mental pain and distress sometimes. my position here is that we need to 1) ruthlessly criticise psychiatry and psychiatric care as it currently exists, 2) determine which—if any!—of its tools and methods can be radically transformed into ways of actually caring for one another, without force or coercion or the imposition of externally defined and moralised ideals, and 3) either way, find ways to ensure we are capable of providing care for one another when we are in need and want it. i am not sure whether something that looks like talk therapy will ever be part of this, and my sense is that, if it were, a lot of this work would become something that friends and social supports are capable of engaging in (it is a leetle fucked up imo that we currently offload this onto a provider–client relationship! like, that says a lot about the world). again, though, i don't think any such care is actually 'care' as long as it's aimed at enforcing an external standard of normalcy, functionality, profitability, &c. what i'm interested in is how we ensure that people are able to define their own happiness and flourishing, and how, given that human life is social and collaborative, those around them can be (when wanted) part of a person's effort to live their best possible and most preferred life.

sorry if this is just a really waffling answer lmao. i guess the tl;dr is: yeah i also worry about this and i don't know!

#psychiatry

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the-stellaron-hunters · 9 months

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Gepard Landau

the alphabet prompt list belongs to the-coldest-goodbye

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

Gepard believes affection is best saved for times when there are no prying eyes around you. Gepard knows he is more involved in his professional life than the average person, which leaves him little to no room for his personal life, but he still makes an effort to strictly separate the two. He eventually loosens up enough that he allows little gestures in public like an arm thrown around your shoulder or his hand in yours, although he refuses to go any further than that. There is a time and place for everything. He will make it all up to you behind closed doors.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

Gepard understandably cannot be a constant presence in your life even if he wants to be there for you. But he's there in every celebration, in every achievement, and when you're at your happiest and at your lowest. Always. Without fail. And with time, you become more familiar with how he often keeps things to himself, so you make sure to remind him every now and then that while you cannot give him a solution to all his problems, you can at least lend him an ear when he needs it. Because of his social standing, Gepard is aware that he isn't exactly the easiest person to befriend, so he appreciates your presence all the more. Even with his packed schedule, he still tries to put in effort into your friendship as you're one of the few people he can confide into when his days get rough. On the other hand, you know he is a capable man who can take care of himself, and yet you can't help but cherish the small, rare moments where he relies on you with the little things like tweaking a recipe or shopping for groceries.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

Gepard isn't used to having someone so close by, so during the first time you told him he can just relax although he ended up feeling anything but comfortable; all he could think about was his own physicality, constantly wondering how he should position himself while worrying about your comfort over his own. It's only after several months of gentle prodding that Gepard is willing to try again, and he becomes less resistant to cuddling when he learns that the nights you cuddle are also the nights when conversations are the easiest, and he eventually forms a habit of slowly stroking his fingers on your scalp as you talk about everything that comes to mind.

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

When Gepard's mind wanders to what the both of you could be, he sometimes thinks of what it's like to settle down, but it's more of a passing thought rather than something he truly wants to do. There's too much on his plate as captain and there's so many things about Belobog that needs to change. Before he became captain, he swore an oath to Qlipoth that he will lay his life for Belobog, and he is a man of his word. As for his housekeeping skills he is average at best although he doesn't get to make use of these skills that much since the family butler often takes care of his chores while he is away.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

When it sinks in to Gepard that he and his partner no longer fit the way they used to, he buries himself in his duties more than usual, partly because his partner probably needs the space to think things through, and partly because he isn't sure how to handle the situation. His days are normally physically taxing but right after the break up his days feel a little slower, a little more tiring than usual. He gave his all in the relationship fully intending to spend the rest of his life with his partner but now that the relationship is gone he feels like a huge part of himself has been taken away from him.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Gepard is familiar with how commitment feels like in the sense that he prioritizes his duty as captain above everything else. But this commitment, the kind where vulnerability is a two-way street... he always has his guard up so this is a territory he is yet to navigate, but the moment he considers you as someone worth the commitment, the possibility of marriage has been taken into consideration. He wouldn't be hasty about it though; he's old-fashioned when it comes to the matters of the heart so he prefers to take his time.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

In his eyes, you're stronger than you give yourself credit for, otherwise Gepard wouldn't think of you as highly as he does. He isn't hard on you but he is firm; if you make a mistake that can be easily fixed or doesn't really affect your future, he is more careful with his words knowing that you will eventually get back on your feet. If it turns out to be serious, he won't hesitate to put his foot down because he doesn't want to see you stuck in your current predicament long enough to the point where the situation becomes irreparable.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

Gepard is not one to initiate displays of affection unless they're behind closed doors, although he wouldn't refuse you if you want or need a hug. His hugs are steady and warm, almost comforting. In private his hugs are frequent and the moments he spends without his arms around you are far and few between. He doesn't let go just yet, waiting for you to give him a sign that you've had your fill, and he gives you one last squeeze before he loosens his hold from you.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

It takes Gepard a long time to process how he feels about you, and even longer to decide what he should do about it. He has other priorities. His world doesn't revolve around you so he has no trouble keeping his emotions in check especially when you're nearby. He already values what he has with you right now which is why he doesn't feel the need to treat you any differently. For a while, he is hesitant on telling you those little three words; his feelings could be a burden to you since he wouldn't be able to dedicate to you all the attention and time that you deserve. Once he sorts out his feelings, he decides that he will only tell you if he is sure that you'll accept the part of him that prioritizes his duty above everything else, otherwise he will take it to the grave.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Gepard is not a jealous person by nature but when he sees someone flirting with you despite your clear lack of interest, his patience gets tested. He generally lets you handle your personal business since it's not in his place to interfere but if you're the type who struggles in this kind of situation, there's no need to worry as his presence is more than enough to send the other person running. There's no reason for him to get jealous when you've already earned his trust. If you do something that will break his trust, like flirting back, the ugly feeling of his will be directed to you, but it's not jealousy as it is more of disappointment since he opened up to you with the expectation that you were going to treat the relationship with respect even when he is not around.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

Gepard prefers all kisses to be behind closed doors which you don't mind in the slightest since it's also when he could give you his full attention. His kisses start off with his lips ghosting over yours, careful, a little hesitant and a lot unsure, as if testing the waters. He then slowly increases in pressure, his movements languid as he takes his time with you. Whenever one of you pulls away he continues to hold you close like he doesn't want to stop.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

It's only during patrols when Gepard gets to see the children, and he is technically still on duty so when the children take notice of him, it takes him a lot of effort to dial down the strictness that he normally reserves for giving out commands. That leaves him in an awkward position as it suddenly occurs to him that he has zero skills on handling children; he finds children too unpredictable and he knows nothing about their interests. Because of that, Gepard isn't sure if he will ever get along with children. His only saving grace is that the children all look up to him so the children are all over him in no time at all. Soon enough, Gepard realizes how much of a pushover he is when he finds himself easily swayed by the children's babbling and their countless requests (piggyback rides and drawing random objects). Gepard still isn't sure if this is how he should be treating children but it seems like they're having a good time so he wants to think that he is doing a decent job at it.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Gepard's body clock is consistent due to his training so expect him to be up at five sharp. If Gepard is not in a rush to get to his post he uses his time in the mornings for himself as he would either tend to his flowers or learn a recipe that he's been wanting to do for a while. You're more than welcome to join him in his morning routine but if you aren't awake yet he wouldn't disturb your peace, moving around as quietly as he can so you don't wake up by the noise. In the rare mornings he lingers in bed he pulls you close and dozes back off.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

Gepard often heads to bed on time, preferably nine or ten PM. He always adheres to his night schedule since he needs all the sleep he could get although he would make exceptions every now and then if they're special occasions that he doesn't get to spend to you during daytime while he is on duty. Most of the time he is tired after a long day so after the nightly routine expect him to get knocked out as soon as his head hits the pillow. When he is less sleepy he is willing to stay up with you and catch up on each other's lives, though if he has to get back to duty tomorrow he has an absolute limit of staying up until eleven. As much as he wants to spend more time with you, he is not going to risk getting himself hurt and possibly compromising his soldiers all because he isn't well-rested.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

Gepard believes he is an open book to people he is close to. He's honest to a fault so he will answer any question you might have for him. There are a couple of things that he doesn't tell you but rather than being secretive, it just never occurs to him to bring them up in conversation, some of them being unpleasant childhood memories and experiences in cadet school where he felt like giving up. He has nothing to hide, all it takes are the right questions and the right person for him to open up.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

As the captain, Gepard has to be patient with all kinds of people regardless of the situation so you can expect the same kind of patience to be extended towards you. He has a lot of patience but it's finite. As long as you don't do anything at the cost of his trust he will always try to be as patient as he can. If he finds himself angered with you he takes a step back from the situation and think of what went wrong, and waits until his mind is clear enough before he asks if he can talk to you. If you refuse the first time that's fine by him since you also need the time to calm down. The more you refuse his attempts of communicating the less his patience gets because he doesn't have all the time in the world and life is too unpredictable to let the problem fester for too long.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

Gepard wouldn't be able to spend a lot of time with you so he does his best to tuck each detail about you close to his heart, and while he has it all figured out, a few details get lost in time as his mind is often filled with responsibilities. He would never forget the most important details like your birthday and your anniversary, which is more than enough for you.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Gepard remembers nearly every moment you went through together, all the confessions and celebrations you shared. But there's something about the small moments with you that's safely tucked into memory: coming home to you and getting enveloped in a hug, or dealing with chores that seem to be a little more bearable with you around, or waking up in the middle of the night to a familiar weight pressing against his chest. When things get hectic he revisits the warmth of your arms and then he's filled with want, suddenly realizing he now knows how the other soldiers felt when they told him they can't wait to get home to their spouses.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

Gepard is protective in a sense that he always reminds you that if you're in trouble he is only a call away, but he does his best not to be overbearing. The last thing he wants is to become imposing especially since he knows how it feels like to have someone dictate your future; he has not experienced it himself since he ended up taking the path his father wants him to take, but he's seen it happen to his elder sister and until now she is still on the receiving end of his family's scorn. He generally lets you handle yourself since you're a capable person with your own voice but if you need his help he wouldn't hesitate to step in. He has never really thought of wanting to be protected because he already took upon the responsibility to protect everyone ever since he was a child. The least you could do is to be there for him and listen to whatever he has to say no matter how insignificant it may seem, and while that doesn't necessarily solve all his problems, that's all it takes for him to feel secure.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

With Gepard's packed schedule it feels as if he isn't trying to be present in your life but you know he is not the type of person to do things without reason. There's a time when he has to be gone for weeks and it happens to coincide with your anniversary. It's hard to not be disappointed, but it's harder to be mad at him when he's sincere with his apology, and way harder to be selfish at a time like this when lives are at stake in his line of work. You entered into a relationship with him knowing this is inevitable. When he does show up and prepare for important dates he puts all his effort even though things don't always go the way he wants them to, but having him around is more than enough.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

At days when Gepard gets too stressed out, he tends to bottle his emotions even though you tell him not to until he blows up in what was supposed to be a petty argument. He tries to keep his emotions in check, really, but sometimes he tends to shut himself out, especially from you, just so you aren't on the receiving end of his outburst when it becomes too much. As captain, he is supposed to be good with communication with his soldiers, but when it comes to you he falls short on that aspect, partly because he's not sure how to express himself when it comes to things like this, and partly because he doesn't to burden you further with his problems. He knows it's not a good thing so he's actively working on it even though he doesn't get the right words out sometimes, which frustrates him half of the time.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

In Gepard's line of work there's no room for him to care about his looks as there are matters that are more pressing than his appearance. He doesn't think too hard about his appearance, at most he just keeps up his hygiene and cleans up a bit before he's good to go.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

If you have to be away for a long time it wouldn't bother Gepard in the slightest. He is used to being apart from his loved ones for long periods of time because of how often he has to be out on the frontlines so he understands where you're coming from. If it's about putting an end to your relationship, though, it's a completely different story. If he loves you there will always be pieces of you that's intertwined in his thoughts, and his habits, and his little actions that wouldn't leave him no matter how hard he tries to get rid of them. When you're gone he somehow doesn't feel the hurt that he expects to feel after losing someone he envisioned his entire future with. It's mostly some kind of emptiness he cannot wrap his head around, the kind that weighs heavy in him after losing something he's grown used to.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

Gepard has a shelf in his room full of trinkets given to him by the children whenever he goes out on patrol. There's an impressive collection of shiny rocks, antique storybooks, candy rings, theater tickets, origamis, and flowers that he had dry pressed and stored in picture frames the same day he got them. Gepard wants to think he is practical with his belongings but he is actually more sentimental than he looks, keeping all the little trinkets that the children probably won't even remember giving him.

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Gepard tries to be tolerant with everyone as he interacts with all kinds of people as the captain, but every now and then he encounters someone who shows a lack of moral compass and their behavior tends to rub him off the wrong way. As someone who stands by his oath to protect Belobog and her people, Gepard has a great deal of empathy so he finds it difficult to understand people who doesn't care the least bit about others. He acknowledges that he is in no place to judge because he doesn't know what the other person went through, so he tries not to think too hard about it.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

Gepard can fall asleep at will. There are a lot of nights when he is dead tired and he sleeps like a log, never moving from his initial position throughout the night. Depending on how he falls asleep it could be an inconvenience to you especially if he is hugging you too tightly and you just want to breathe. He is by no means a light sleeper but thankfully it's still easy to wake him up so he can loosen his hold on you, mumbling a sleepy apology before he goes back to sleep.

#gepard landau #gepard landau x you #gepard landau x reader #honkai star rail #honkai star rail imagines #honkai star rail x you #honkai star rail x reader #hsr #hsr imagines #hsr x you #hsr x reader

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jannwrites · 2 years

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SUBSTANCE USE DISORDERS: A GUIDE FOR WRITERS.

hey i’m a mental health therapist and a writer here on tumblr dot com, back again with another “how to write mental health” guide! this time we’re talking about SUBSTANCE USE DISORDERS! this is MY very specific wheelhouse because i do intensive outpatient work for a substance use disorder treatment agency!

i have seen SO MANY gross mischaracterizations of addictions on tumblr, specifically within the indie roleplay community, from demonizing addicts to misinterpreting addiction to calling their “has a glass of sometimes after work and blacked out once after one night of drinking” little dudes alcoholics. for the purpose of this post, i’m going to try and stick to the CLINICAL side of addiction because there’s a pretty huge addiction recovery/sobriety culture that is incredibly lovely and supportive but it can get convoluted with all the different programs there are out there.

now, let’s start with what makes a substance use disorder a substance use disorder. a substance use disorder is any sort of PROBLEMATIC USE OF A SUBSTANCE THAT INTERFERES WITH DAILY LIFE AND DAILY FUNCTIONS. depending on the specific substance the diagnostic criteria looks a little different but all substance use disorders diagnoses more or less follow the following criteria ( pulled from the opioid use disorder criteria in the DSM-5 ):

a problematic pattern of [drug/alcohol] use leading to clinically significant impairment or distress, as manifested by at least 2 of the following, occurring within a 12-month period:

[drug/alcohol] are often taken in larger amounts or over a longer period than was intended.

there is a persistent desire or unsuccessful efforts to cut down or control [drug/alcohol] use.

a great deal of time is spent in activities necessary to obtain the [drug/alcohol], use the [drug/alcohol], or recover from its effects.

note: THESE DO NOT JUST INCLUDE ILLEGAL ACTIVITIES. i’ve had clients with alcohol use disorders wake up early and hang around the gas station until it opens at 7am to get their first 12-packs for the day, go through great lengths to hide alcohol from spouses, stash alcohol around their work spaces so they can drink periodically throughout the day, etc. not necessarily illegal, definitely problematic.

craving or a strong desire or urge to use [drug/alcohol].

recurrent [drug/alcohol] use resulting in a failure to fulfill major role obligations at work, school, or home.

continued [drug/alcohol] use despite having persistent or recurrent social or interpersonal problems caused or exacerbated by the effects of [drug/alcohol].

note: ask yourself here how your character’s relationships are effected by their drug/alcohol use.

important social, occupational, or recreational activities are given up or reduced because of [drug/alcohol] use.

recurrent [drug/alcohol] in situations in which it is physically hazardous.

continued [drug/alcohol] despite knowledge of having a persistent or recurrent physiological ( physical--think of the body reactions ) or psychological problem that is likely to have been caused or exacerbated by the substance.

tolerance, as defined by either of the following:

a need for markedly increased amounts of [drug/alcohol] to achieve intoxication or desired effect.

a markedly diminished effect with continued use of the same amount of [drug/alcohol].

withdrawal.

debunking some common themes i see across the writing community:

SUBSTANCE USE DISORDERS ARE, MORE OFTEN THAN NOT, A RESPONSE TO COMPLEX TRAUMA. i’ve been in this field for 4 years and 99% of the clients i have seen have experienced some degree of trauma. getting absolutely plastered and high is a damn effective way to check out when someone is experiencing chronic trauma and doesn’t want to deal with the overwhelming emotions that come with it.

SUBSTANCE USE DISORDERS ARE, MORE OFTEN THAN NOT, CO-MORBID WITH OTHER MENTAL HEALTH DISORDERS. similar to the above point, checking out with drugs and alcohol is a damn good way to forget how shit your brain is.

THERE IS A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN A SUBSTANCE USE DISORDER/ADDICTION AND CASUAL DRUG AND ALCOHOL USE. if your character smokes weed at the end of the day, or takes prescription pain pills for chronic pain as prescribed, or goes to the occasional party with their friends on the weekends, or drops acid at a rave, and these things are otherwise not interfering with their lives--that’s not an addiction. that’s casual drug and alcohol use and it’s fine. people are allowed to let loose sometimes.

PLEASE TRY TO STRAY AWAY FROM DEMONIZING A CHARACTER WITH A SUBSTANCE USE DISORDER. a big part of treatment is processing the “why” while also acknowledging that your actions related to your substance abuse have affected others. that does not mean people who are struggling with addiction are less deserving of love and compassion. the reality of addiction is that yes, a lot of folks with an addiction do have very strained relationships and have done unsavory things while in their active addiction. if you come at it from the perspective of “this person is dealing with strong internal turmoil” though, how does your portrayal of your character change? how do their internal monologues change?

CONSIDER WHY YOUR CHARACTER IS TRYING TO CHECK OUT WITH DRUGS AND ALCOHOL. what’s going on in the ol’ coconut that they’re struggling to deal with? alternatively or in addition, do they have something going on PHYSICALLY that they’re trying to deal with, like chronic pain? common feelings associated with people who are in their active addiction are anger, anxiety, grief, self-loathing, depression, sadness, fear--i assume you know feeling words if you’re a writer so i’ll stop there.

NOT ALL ADDICTS ENGAGE IN CRIMINAL ACTIVITY AND EVEN IF THEY DO, THEY ARE NO LESS DESERVING OF LOVE AND COMPASSION. i work primarily with court ordered clients with high criminogenic risk factors. i have groups full of felons and they are some of the loveliest, kindest people i have ever met. similar to substance use disorders, criminality can be a response to trauma. a teen who is growing up in a loving stable home isn’t going to turn to gang activity, an adult with healthy relationships and coping skills isn’t going to hold up gas stations or get into dealing drugs. people are just people. similar to the above point, if your character is engaging in criminal activity, ask yourself why they would be and see if that changes the way you portray them.

that’s all i have for now! feel free to reach out to me if you have any questions because again, this is precisely my wheelhouse. it’s what i treat every day.

cheers, and happy writing!

#writing resources #rp resources #rpc #character inspo #since even More of you need to learn #* mine.#guide: mental health.

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existentialcrisis-24-7 · 10 months

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Trix on your rewrite?

Thank you so much for this ask! I'm actually so sorry it has taken me this long to answer, but I am my own worst critic and couldn't come up with an answer until now that I was satisfied with. I'm still not totally satisfied with this, but I'd rather just rip off the bandaid with this at this point so it's not proofread or anything. Enjoy!

(cut bc it got long)

Icy was once the second princess of Dyamond. Her childhood was pretty normal by princess standards until she was 7, when a cataclysmic magical storm swept through the world and destroyed everything and everyone in its path, leaving only her.

While stumbling around the ruins of her castle, she came across Mandragora. Icy panicked and shot a magic blast at Mandragora which she very easily deflected. There was a silent stand-off for a while between the two while the Ancestral Witches debated on what to do about the situation, shocked that anyone had been able to survive their storm, much less a child. Tharma thought they should just kill Icy, tying up their loose end, and be done with it. Belladonna believed they could use Icy to get what they needed and then they could leave her to die. Liliss pointed out that the only pawn they had was Mandragora who was in fact a known war criminal and that having a pawn so young, impressionable and unrelated to them could prove to be useful. Tharma got outvoted and it was decided that Icy could live.

It was explained to Icy (in child terms) that Mandragora was trying to find the person who caused the storm and that if Icy came with them and followed the Witches’ orders they would help her get revenge. They generally exploited the fact that Icy was a child in an extremely vulnerable emotional state. Icy agreed and picked up witchcraft without too much trouble, meeting Darcy and Stormy years down the line when she was 13 and 14 respectively.

Icy’s magic is incredibly strong, with her having the most experience and the one with the strongest negative feelings backing it as well as a lot of one on one training from the Ancestral Witches.

In terms of her role in the group, she’s the leader. She always has a plan and can keep her cool in nearly any situation in spite of her temper. While she wasn’t much like this as a child, Icy has grown to be incredibly cold and ruthless. She genuinely cares about her sisters, but if she needed to sacrifice them to achieve her goals and couldn’t find another way, she would do it. Beyond her sisters, she doesn’t really care for anyone and usually only keeps them around for as useful as they can be to her. Between her and her only, she’s got really bad attachment issues and kinda clings to people like life rafts.

Icy is the only one of the Trix that knew anything about Darkar before he gets his big reveal, though she only really knew that he was more powerful than the Ancestral Witches.

I'm also debating as of right now whether I should make Icy have albinism.

Darcy was the middle child of the wealthy D’Arcy family on Fallot. She spent most of her childhood being routinely ignored and disregarded and learned to use this to her advantage. She taught herself how subtly manipulate people and blend into the background even more allowing her to get away with a lot of questionable things. Eventually she picked up witchcraft and found she had quite the affinity for it (repressed feelings of loneliness and anger helped immensely with that), and spent a lot more of her time practising it growing to be quite proficient for someone her age. Her family found out and, with witch discrimination running rampant across the Magic Dimension (in spite of Griffin’s best efforts), her family forced her to give it up. Darcy naturally didn’t take too kindly to this and made the choice to leave at the age of 12. Her family didn’t notice for nearly 2 days.

Darcy went around a month before she met Icy and very quickly convinced her that she should be allowed to join. Mandragora was not happy to have to keep an eye on another child but relented after Liliss claimed that Darcy could prove to be a powerful witch if given the right push.

In terms of her relationship with the rest of the group, Darcy is the one with the spellbook. She is incredibly people-smart and intuitive. She has trained herself to be able to sense others’ magic in both strength and type allowing her to pick up large advantages in battles when it comes to bluffing, though she has never been one to like actual combat. Darcy prefers manipulating her target or distracting them with her illusions and isn’t that good at taking a direct hit. She also tends to panic in high-stress situations or when things don’t go immediately right resulting in her overthinking. Darcy is also a horrible actor in spite of her incredible manipulation and lying skills thanks to her tendency to panic.

Darcy genuinely looks up to both Icy and Stormy. On bad days she’s convinced that they could do everything without her and if she didn’t push herself constantly to keep up they would drop her. The rational side of her knows this simply isn’t true, they’re sisters and all bring something special and important to the coven, but the lingering thought eats at her. She’s terrified of being alone, unseen and unheard again.

Stormy was kind of a fucked up kid. She wasn’t evil ya know but it was that whole situation of looking after a “problem child” and just giving up on them because they’re struggling in a way adults don’t understand and lashing out. Eventually, after years of this treatment, Stormy had given up on the adults in her life and decided to strike out on her own at the ripe old age of 10. She was on her own for 3 years, travelling across the magic dimension, when, at 13, she encountered Darcy and Icy. She demanded to join their duo and the two were immediately against it, thinking she would only be a detriment to them and that they were far better off as two. Stormy started following them around in spite of their refusal and after they got into a bit of a pickle, she saved their lives. Icy and Darcy persuaded Mandragora to let Stormy stick with them, believing that Mandragora relented because of their expert convincing skills, though in all actuality it was due to Tharma taking an immediate liking to Stormy’s chaotic attitude.

Stormy, when Icy and Darcy first met her, gave off the impression of the character who’s the comedy relief with a dark secret, except she doesn’t really keep the dark parts a secret. Stormy was the first of the group to kill someone and she did it before she even joined them. She made money mostly by beating people up and stealing it, though when she wasn’t in the mood for a fight she would instead dance and entertain along busy streets. She ended up being quite the dancer, even making money off challenging professionals.

Stormy is the most adaptable of the group and tends to be able to go with the flow incredibly well thanks to how quickly she had to adapt and learn as a child. She’s the tank of the group, coming in with maybe not the most precise attacks but definitely the most deadly and destructive, and definitely doesn’t mind getting her hands dirty and fighting without magic. Out of all 3 of the girls, Stormy has the most magical stamina from all the intense dancing workouts she does nearly daily. This workout can get on the other girls’ nerves since she does it at all hours, but since it makes Stormy happy and ensures their heavy-hitter can continue beating the shit out of people they don’t bother her about it.

Stormy is incredibly confident in herself and words rarely ever hurt. She has no problem hurting others if she thinks it’ll be fun, though she struggles to find that point in which things have gone too far which can often lead to things blowing up in her face. This can happen with the Trix too, Stormy pulling a prank that she takes too far and She doesn’t have a lot of clear memories left from her childhood before being on the road and joining the Trix, however she can still remember how it felt before she ran. Over the years Stormy has grown very apathetic towards things, only really caring if she can cause chaos in some way, though her temper has not improved since she was young and continues to be very short. While a short temper isn't usually great, Stormy actually couldn't perform any strong magic without it since witchcraft relies so heavily on negative feelings.

Also, their names weren't originally Icy, Darcy and Stormy but their old names aren't really of relevance so I'm not including them. Just figured that was worth clarifying.

#winx #winx club #winx rewrite #winx trix #winx icy #winx darcy #winx stormy

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