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beesonhoneytoast · 10 months

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Modern!Demon Slayer and what music they listen to

ib: @sxbrinakanroji ty for the idea boo 🫶🏻

remember these are MY personal headcanons for the characters! agree with them or not, they’re still my ideas.

Tanjiro Kamado

it’s only appropriate we start out with the main boy, the best boy, Tanjiro

tbh his is a toughie

i feel like he’d listen to anything and everything, no matter the genre

except country cos dear god

he’d just find a good song/artist he likes no matter the genre and he’s like

“yep, you’re one of my favourites now”

(he’s just like me fr)

tbh he’d be the friend that’d let his friends go ham on the aux

until inosuke starts playing some cursed shit on blast and ends up upsetting the neighbours

Zenitsu Agatsuma

im just gonna be honest this man probably only listens to girl bands like blackpink, and knows some ogs like spice girls and destiny’s child-

he’s a simp

but fr

like can you imagine him jamming out to survivor??

“zenitsu, what are you doing-“ “AHHHHH!!!! YOU SAW NOTHING!!!!!”

throws a shoe at tanjiro for good measure

let the mans listen to his destiny’s child in peace smh /lh

Inosuke Hashibira

mans listens to heavy metal bands, i don’t make the rules ok-

does the opening to Twist by Korn at 3AM simply to scare the shit out of everyone

*scatting Twisted* “inosuke it’s the middle of the night pLEASE—“

feral boy? feral music taste

PEPPERONI AND GREEN PEPPERS MUSHROOMS OLIVES CHIVES-

the thing i said about inosuke playing random shit on blast when he’s had the aux passed? He really just does it to mess with people, just out of spite

mans loves watching people be utterly confused as to why CPR by CupcakKe is playing and inosuke is like 🦟🦗🦟🦗🦟🦗

Nezuko Kamado

lofi.

no elaboration will be made.

Nezuko listens to lofi (and Blackpink maybe)

mostly lofi tho-

there’s also a tiny part of me screaming that Nezuko is also a Marina and Mitski fan too

Kanao Tsuyuri

for kanao I feel like she would use her coin to decide what she listened to

until tanjiro told her it’s okay to have her own music preferences

after that I think she’s an avid Hatsune Miku or general Vocaloid fan

idk

Tengen Uzui

the idea that basically inspired the rest of the post to really even happen, was from @sxbrinakanroji (their @ was also at the top)

they had the hc that modern!Tengen is a Swiftie and I can’t help but agree with them

BUT

I feel like Makio, Hinatsuru, and Suma were responsible for getting him into Taylor

I feel like pre-married Tengen was a metalhead and also a hip-hop lover

blasted Slim Shady on the aux

then he met the three and now he’s obsessed with Taylor

may or may not had gone to a Taylor concert with the girls

Kyojuro Rengoku

my lil pookie bear

I miss him sm ☹️

curse you Ufotable for getting me to like this loudmouth flamy boy only to make him a freshly glazed Krispy Kreme doughnut all in the same movie

anyways ☺️

he’s an Imagine Dragons and Fall Out Boy fan bc the Rengoku playlists on YT made me do it

Muichiro Tokito

now keep in mind I haven’t seen Swordsmith Village still so I basically have no idea what this goofy lil guy is actually like

but from what I heard from my brother and some friends, he’s no thoughts head empty all the time

white noise

tv static

whatever it is

that’s what he listens to

that’s it

Mitsuri Kanroji

pretty girl 🫶

can’t wait to see her 🥹

she’s the love hashira

ofc love songs are what she listens to

but off the love songs made by women bc

she’s sapphic

and that’s on canon /j

Shinobu Kocho

she’s a runner she’s a track star-

idk who said that uh

anyways

she’s a Mitski fan

WHY ARE YOU BOOING ME IM RIGHT-

Sanemi Shinazugawa

metalhead

that’s all

both derogatory and affectionately, he is a metalhead ☺️

—————————————

this was all my tiny brain could fart out, if y’all have any ideas or suggestions please leave them in the comments :)

-ryan 🎐

#demon slayer #tanjiro #zenitsu #inosuke #nezuko #shinobu #rengoku #kamaboko squad #tengen #sanemi #makio #hinatsuru #suma #kanao #mitsuri #muichiro #kny headcanons #modern!kny

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the1975attheirverybest · 1 year

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I just saw a comment under an Instagram post of Matty playing guitar tonight that said “y’all better have booed him this time” and it made me want to cry.

To be clear, I’ve seen the clip of Phoebe introducing him tonight and he got plenty of cheers, so that’s not the issue.

The issue is people being fucking toxic. I just can’t help but think of how back when Kanye interrupted Taylor famously, she heard the crowd booing HIM but thought it was for HER, and even after she found out the truth, that moment fucked with her and her confidence for years. How dare swifties even joke about doing that to someone she loves. She would be so mad.

Honestly I don’t understand how people so easily forget that Matty and Taylor are human. Like, imagine going to your workplace or going somewhere with your partner and knowing that people around you wish you weren’t there or hearing people booing you? Does it not occur to them how shitty that is?

I feel sad when I see that shit too cuz I imagine Matty coming across some of those comments and wondering if he is as horrible as people say. Then I think if he were online he’d probs my be brutally funny about it all and not take it too personally and so maybe we should try to detach too? Idk it’s just sad seeing the art and the person who have shaped so much of my life be not only unappreciated but desecrated and disrespected at every turn. If you don’t like him then ignore his existence! Why go out of your way to make his life harder !!!

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katnissgirlsmakedo · 1 year

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be controversial. rank midnights. <3

well since you asked <3 i like to group them into categories. 1) overhyped and quickly lost their shine to me. 2) overrated by swifties because they’re specific to miss taylor’s life. but can’t be related to anything else, you know, the way you’re supposed to do with music :/ 3) hidden gems everyone overlooks. and 4) grew on me like a strange mold or fungus

high infidelity- everybody knows i love this song and i love cheating and infidelity. literally your picket fence is sharp as knives. do i really have to tell you how he brought me back to life…. insane song. if julian fellowes heard this he’d spontaneously explode (<- guy who has normal feelings and no resentment about british drama downton abbey and it’s creator voice)

the great war- literally i didn’t appreciate her in the beginning i was so foolish i was so naive… literally all that bloodshed crimson clover uh huh sweet dream was over my hand was the one you reached for all throughout the great war… i love that she compared fighting with your lover to world war one. someone should make a riverdale core four amv to this

snow on the beach- i love this song right now. it’s simple it’s nice it’s a lovely little love song and lana del ray is doing her moan-singing in the background what’s not to like! also it makes me think about merlin and morgana which causes my brain to short circuit. i overlooked her when the album first came out but i’m back now i should never have left her…

question- i swear to god i’m not being biased because this one also makes me think of merlin and morgana. however it does. anyway i actually always liked this one but i forgot about it for a few weeks there and now i want to listen to it on repeat…

glitch- i love glitch. everybody hates glitch idk what y’all’s problem is i think glitch is fun. also it’s about my buddy kit herondale. if you even care. i don’t however like it as much as i did before i started listening to the above songs again. but i’ve always been a glitch defender

sweet nothing- i think it’s a nice and lovely little song <3 however i hate the parts that are Taylor Specific. but in general i like this song a lot, i remember saying when i first heard it it was a jabitha song and like. so true me it IS a jabitha song… they said the end is coming everyone’s up to something but all that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing…..

lavender haze- i didn’t like this one initially because it felt too self referential but the “i’m damned if i do give a damn what people say” line goes crazy. i love how she sings that line i love the play on words i love how real it is. we literally are all damned if we do give a damn what people say….

vigilante shit- VERY much suffers from being too much about taylor’s life however it grew on me and EYE think it’s fun. also i am going to make a morgana amv to this. sorry i’ve literally mentioned morgana so many times already but what can i say midnights is a very morgana album to me

mastermind- mal descendants swag… i haven’t listened to this one much since the early days but i didn’t grow to dislike it at all it’s fine it’s just not my favorite

paris- i hate this song. i also am obsessed with it. it’s so complex. all i really know is that i actively seek out listening to this more than most on the album.

you’re on your own kid- has some good stuff going on but in general this is another Specific To Taylor’s Situation song and i don’t like that!!! i hate that so much of her music is unable to be applied to anything but her life it’s narcissistic and masturbatory and ridiculous. and swifites eat it up because they’re functionally in a cult. however the first couple lines of the bridge make me insane so.

karma- i don’t mind this song but i rarely seek it out to listen. also i hate when she says “spider boy” girl what are you even talking about there and are you sure there were no other words you could have used?

anti-hero- very much a taylor swift lead single in the sense that it is bad! i loved it at first honestly but i think swifties and tiktok made it so annoying and insufferable it ruined it for me and now i’m like ughhh yeah girl i get it you’re the anti hero whatever. i don’t hate it it’s a fun song. it’s a very blorbo song to me also obviously, but it’s also kind of annoying and also there was a period of like two weeks where i kept getting this ad on spotify with this song but it was just the part where she repeats it’s me hi i’m the problem it’s me and it just kept repeating and it made me lose my mind a little. i considered starting to pay for spotify because of that ad.

bejeweled- i liked this one and then taylor made it a single and i kept hearing it on tiktok and now i think it’s mildly annoying. it’s fun don’t get me wrong i still like it but. well you know what i mean

bigger than the whole sky- kind of a nothing song tbh. i remember really liking it back when it came out but what the hell was i thinking… i skip it so fast now…

midnight rain- kind of a nothing song to me. what the hell are you even talking about taylor. also jack antonoff’s production here pisses me off. it feels like she named the album midnights and THEN wrote this song to fit the theme and i don’t care if that’s true that’s how it feels and i don’t like it.

maroon- i. don’t like maroon. it’s lame to me. i liked it at first but the shine wore off now it’s just like. what the fuck does it even mean? outside the obvious red reference it’s a nothing meaning and it’s lame. i love that it features cheating tho!

would’ve could’ve should’ve- TERMINAL Specific To Taylor’s Situation disease!!! also i really don’t like the way the transition between the pre-chorus and the chorus sounds. i like the beginning when she’s singing in a deeper voice but as soon as she jumps to the higher pitch i hate it so much. i also don’t vibe when taylor tries to write religious metaphors. she’s not good at it and i can tell she didn’t grow up going to church every sunday and is mainly just culturally christian. taylor you’re not ethel cain stop trying to do religious references in your lyrics.

labyrinth- i literally listened to this once and i never want to do it again. boring! lame! i literally don’t even give enough of a shit to try to remember what it was even about. all i know is that when it comes on i press skip

dear reader- i don’t think i ever listened to this all the way through. it bored me to my core and it just immediately felt like a Specific To Taylor song and i didn’t care to find out. idk what the songs even about and i never want to because i don’t care <3

#this is of course subject to change in another few months when the album is more than twoish months old #asks #subarubajafanclub

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bisluthq · 2 years

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I just woke up and what clip are you guys talking about? the one where he apparently says alison. I just spent like an hour scrolling through your blog to find it but couldn't find anything. 😩

It’s the second sex scene in E3. Anon submitted it so maybe search submission. Like my guys it’s a misheard sound and if you think Lenny is shit at his job I’m gonna start truthering Starbucks lovers and the dumb Good Charlotte line.

I’m less annoyed with the anti angle and more with how y’all are disrespecting Lenny, Ita, the editing team and the rest of the post team. Anon compared this to Supernatural and that fucking got me. Whether you like this show or not, it’s impeccably made. Lenny is an actual Best Picture and Best Director Academy Award nominee. He notices the littlest fucking things. This man is so meticulous and determined to maintain realism and naturalism that he made Joe do a weird accent because he figured it was unrealistic for a man who lived in London and has an English wife not to have a twang. He notices the littlest things.

And you genuinely think YOU noticed something he didn’t?

Stop fucking disrespecting the professionals who made this.

If he’d said Alison, it wouldn’t have made it in the fucking film. They’d have cut it. Your weird Swiftie asses wouldn’t be noticing mistakes in Lenny’s films.

The accent wasn’t a mistake and neither was this so fucking shut up or idk go talk to people who hear it, don’t know shit about post, and want to discuss this. After that go sing Starbucks Lovers.

#nat talks cwf

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imaginedhaven · 3 years

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LAST for RoE

POV for RR 😊

LAST for Rules of Engagement:

...hahaha, that would be the last two sentences of the last update. I haven’t progressed further in it yet, since I’ve been writing a Yulemas oneshot that has TAKEN OVER MY LIFE y’all get ready for 10,000 words of bittersweet pining with an eventual happy ending. (For the Swifties in the fandom, as I’m sure you all know writing it to evermore and folklore... may have been a mistake!) As a refresher, though, those last two sentences:

She was Aelin Ashryver Galathynius, and she had a crown to win. She would not be afraid.

POV for Reluctantly Rooming:

LOL You guys REALLY want to know what on earth our bird boy is thinking, don’t you? Let’s see, I’ve already given y’all the broken ankle scene... What about the dancing from last update? I’m sure that’s what you all want to see anyway!

Rowan jerked awake to the sound of music playing through the tinny speaker of a phone and a rustling in the kitchen. Fuck, he’d fallen asleep on his desk, and he couldn’t even be sure how late it was. Very late, if Aelin was home to be making those noises.

Hands scrubbing over his face in an attempt to wake up just a little bit more, he stalked toward the kitchen to investigate, only to stop in his tracks when he saw her.

She was still in the buttoned shirt and dark slacks that made up her uniform for her job, though the buttons had been opened to reveal a dark form-fitting undershirt. She was digging in the cabinets, clearly searching for something, but as she worked her hips were moving back and forth with the beat of the song that played from what was likely her own phone.

As he quietly watched, she let out a soft happy noise and emerged from the cabinet, a bar of chocolate clutched in her hand. Ah. So she’d managed to bring more snacks into the house without him knowing about it, and put them somewhere they didn’t belong. She brought the chocolate to her lips, and he already knew both what would come next and that he was not sufficiently awake to handle her eating chocolate right now. Instead, he cleared his throat and asked a question that made her whirl around to face him, eyes wide. “What are you doing?”

#asks #haven writes #rules of engagement #reluctantly rooming

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henrik-von-schneeplestein · 5 years

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Hewwo. You mentioned liking certain albums and songs for the jse egos and ships, what about for the Sander's sides? 👀 Are there any songs you like for certain ships you like? ❣️

HFJDHGJG YEPPP! Not quite as many, just bc I’m new to the fandom but I definitely have thoughts!

Before y’all who are annoyed with me ranting about Taylor jump ship:

-”Pioneer” by The Band Perry is SUCH a good Roman song omg just the softest song about the creative spirit & bravery

-”Lovefool” by the Cardigans is... Deceit’s karaoke song. I have no rationale or defense for this statement whatsoever it just came up on shuffle the other day and I for some reason could picture him singing it perfectly and now I can’t let it go. Roman’s karaoke song is probably like “Any Man of Mine” by Shania Twain. Idk what the other sides’ go-to karaoke songs are but PLEASE lmk what y’all think bc I wanna know

Anyway Taylor time. People w/ bad taste in music you’re free to go now. Have a nice night and please don’t unfollow me

Roman is both the side I think would most be a fan on Taylor and also who has the most Taylor songs that remind me of him.

“White Horse” is definitely a Roman song. Like just change the gender (from ‘princess’ to ‘prince’) and it fits perfectly - a “dreamer” who has the beautiful, romantic fantasies they believe in challenged and emerges stronger but still believing in all those wonderful things... catch me crying

“Starlight” is the other song that has strong Roman vibes to me again bc of the ‘dream impossible dreams’ thing & another ref to a prince (and a ‘duchess’ ((duke)) but it def feels more roman than remus to me). Could definitely be a prinxiety song given the second verse: He said, “look at you, worrying too much about things you can’t change. You’ll spend your whole life singing the blues if you keep thinking that way.” He was trying to skip rocks on the ocean, saying to me, “don’t you see the starlight? Don’t you dream impossible things?”

Honestly the whole Red album has Roman vibes to me which makes sense assuming his color is red for the same reason she chose that title: bc it symbolizes passion. It really specifically reminds me of him in the ‘Moving On’ videos - him having a hard time letting go of a relationship but ultimately realizing it must be done strongly reminded me of “Red” (the song), “I Almost Do,” and “All Too Well”

LOVES “Wonderland” bc it’s gay uhhh Disney references no but he’d be all over that ‘too in love to think straight’ pun.... and the sheer DRAMA of writing your ex’s fucking TUMBLR URL into a song

“Love Story” and “Today Was a Fairytale” need I say more

Virgil is definitely AT LEAST a Speak Now stan - some of you are too young to remember it and some of you are still too salty to acknowledge it but from like 2008-2011 especially there was the Emo Swiftie phenomenon where a bunch of us very edgy emo kids who liked Panic! & MCR were also Taylor fans. Like she wasn’t considered emo at all but she had the same lyricism & theatricality, and the rampant slutshaming didn’t really start until 2012 so it wasn’t nearly as uncool to like her. So yeah Virgil’s been a secret passenger on the Taylor train for a while

He’s SUPER unwilling to admit it at first but as soon as Roman figures it out they bond & talk about their fav songs

emo boy is most definitely a “Haunted” stan

All I WANT is Virgil in the famous purple Speak Now tour dress and if I had a shred of artistic talent him in that dress under the glowing tree would be the first thing I drew

“Out of the Woods” is a Virgil song - Taylor literally said that the main feeling she was trying to capture is anxiety (x). I would also like to see Virgil in the OOTW music video. Give my baby some WOLVES.

“The Archer” is very literally about anxiety & imposter syndrome I don’t think I need to defend that being a Virgil song

“Afterglow” and “Delicate” belong on any ship playlist involving Virgil

Someone sing “Innocent” to this boy immediately

My favorite Virgil song actually isn’t “The Archer” even though that’s the most obvious - I think “Daylight” is the best one. He’s wounded the good & he’s trusted the wicked y’all!!! But it’s brighter now!!!! I love him!!!!!

With Deceit I see the obvious comparison to “Look What You Made Me Do” and it works pretty well but I think the best Deceit song is def “I Did Something Bad” - ‘for every lie I tell them they tell me three’ ‘this is how the world works; you gotta leave before you get left.’ Also my position just in general is that IDSB is the Distinguished Gay Villain Song & LWYMMD is the Disaster Gay Villain Song.

That said, the only reason Deceit’s never done the traditional Rise Into Frame is to keep me specifically from making a joke about Karyn rising out of the stage during LWYMMD (x) - it’s true my cousin’s best friend’s uncle was an extra in the Sanders Sides he played Roman’s sword

Deceit’s real name is Karyn I cracked it y’all

Also it makes me really excited that the LWYMMD tour outfit is kinda similar to Deceit’s. Something about having the initials TS just makes you go ‘snake time’ and put on a black cape/shirt/jacket thing with yellow/gold accents I guess

“End Game” is a Remus/Deceit song - ‘you like the bad ones, too’ = they’re both dark sides, “you’ve been calling my bluff on all my usual tricks so here’s the truth from my red lips” = Deceit

“New Romantics” is just like ‘let’s lie our way through society’ so

Remus really reminds me of the swift fandom itself and idk what else to say about that bc if you’ve never been in that fandom I don’t know how to explain it to you and if you’ve been in that fandom for even 5 minutes you don’t need me to explain it to you

ME! is such a Remus song!! ‘I know that I’m a handful, baby, UH! I know I never think before I jump’ & ‘I would never bore you baby;’ also ‘like a rainbow with all of the colors’ reminds me of Remus saying ‘if you want the spectrum A-Z then you’ll need a little help from ME!” AND the song tends to get stuck in your head (or it does for me anyway) - kind of Remus’s M.O.

We already know he likes “Shake It Off” lol

Those of y’all who are horny for Remus and I know you’re out there.... “False God” is the song for you

could also be Remus/Deceit - Remus does use Deceit as the serpent in the Garden of Eden after all

Patton is just all the soft love songs lbr. “Stay Stay Stay,” “Paper Rings,” “Our Song,”etc. Also “Never Grow Up” and “Fifteen” and bc he’s nostalgic but also a father w/ good advice.

OK before I do Logan songs I just gotta tell you I was listening to “Tim McGraw” recently and my mind went “he said the way my blue eyes shined put those Georgia stars to shame that night; I said ‘FALSEHOOD’” but anyway

“New Year’s Day” - the references to books/pages fits and also the sort of comforting vibe that Logan can have; it’s a more realistic view of love about how there’s no way to know for sure what’s going to happen but knowing that you’re in it even for the worst

“I Think He Knows” belongs on the playlist for any ship involving Logan

He’d love “Miss Americana & the Heartbreak Prince” but when she’s like ‘where are the wise men?’ he’d be like ‘I’m right here beech’

And with that, I think I need to be done for now lol. Thank you so much for asking & letting me dump all this here. I love you!!!!

#asks #anon #long post

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religionsinyourlips-archive · 7 years

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apologies for being so cheesy/obnoxious, but I wanna put this out there.

okay, so I know she (being @taylorswift) will most likely never see this because I’m a small account that hasn’t doesn’t have any friends on here and hasn’t been around for long (my old Taylor account is 4 years old and I haven’t been able to sign into it for about 2 years, RIP), but I just wanted to share this after thinking long and hard about my life so far.

this is really long and I apologize, but I hope it’s worth reading. if not, I apologize.

also, trigger warnings for those who get triggered by mention of self harm, eating disorders, and suicide attempts.

my 21st birthday is a week from tomorrow and I realized while walking my dog earlier this evening that Taylor and her music have been in and such a big part of my life for 11 crazy years. like, I know quite a few of y’all are older than me, but I don’t think I ever really thought about how much of an impact she’s made on me and how I’ve acted about certain situations until now. I know I’m not anything special because so many people have gone through worse things than I have, but I just wanted to share my story. maybe it might help someone, I don’t know.

we’re gonna go through by how each record has impacted my life and helped me through certain shit.

HERE WE GO, Y’ALL.

anyways, Taylor’s music has almost constantly been in my life since Tim McGraw was released as a single. I heard that for the first time in 5th grade because my best friend at the time was (and still is) obsessed with country music. now, I know Taylor’s not really considered country anymore, but we’ve all heard the debut album, so we know why my best friend at the time (Emily) was obsessed with it. anyways, I wasn’t quite smart enough to truly appreciate Tim McGraw (I was literally nine years old) like I do now, so I just kinda listened to it and lived my life as best as I could.

things started to change, however, when Teardrops on My Guitar came out. that came out at the beginning of my 6th grade year and as soon as I heard it on the radio, I was hooked. like, 1500000% obsessed. I had this cheap flip phone at the time (yeah, I know, a ten-year old with a phone) and I used it to record that song whenever it came on the radio. since iPods weren’t super popular with the kiddos back then, I listened to it on literal repeat on my phone’s memos when I wasn’t at school or in church or sleeping. I was literally so obsessed. I didn’t really realize until now, but Teardrops on My Guitar really helped me get through this heartbreaking failed crush I had between 5th and 6th grade, so thanks for that Taylor. ANYWAYS. as her other singles from her debut album came out and were played on the radio (Our Song, Picture to Burn, Should’ve Said No), I became more and more obsessed. that was mainly because I didn’t have many true friends and was bullied quite a bit all throughout grade school, so I felt like someone who didn’t even know me by name was there for support.

again, ANYWAYS. after being content with being a Taylor Swift fan through that debut era, I moved from where I was born and raised (southwestern Illinois) to Missouri (the Kansas City area/the western side of the state) because of my dad’s job. I went from having a couple good friends and not feeling like I had to try too hard to fit in to having no friends and wanting so badly to fit in. well, in doing so, I went into that trademark emo phase and the friends I made at that time made me think Taylor Swift made the worst music ever. that didn’t last long, though, because my choir teacher in 7th grade had us sing Love Story right after Fearless was released, so I was back to being hooked. but this time around, I had to keep quiet in order to maintain my not super great but I thought it was better than what I had in Illinois reputation (LOL I’m sorry, I had to).some of hiding that part of my life (the happy part of my life) got me so down and upset that I started self harming. it was bad. like, really bad. I managed to keep it a secret, though. anyways. the debut album and Fearless helped me through some tough times in seventh grade, including my cat of my whole entire life at that point dying, starting to discover my sexual orientation, and my parents not living together for four or five months.

we’re doing this again, but ANYWAYS (it’s obnoxious, I know). after being in Kansas City for about eight months, my dad broke the news to us that we were moving across the state of Kansas and halfway through the state of Colorado. I was absolutely heartbroken because I had to start that process all over again and knew it was going to be hard on me. I don’t know why, but Fifteen, Fearless, and Change got me through a lot of that when I moved here. anyways. by the time I moved here and got settled, Speak Now had come out (that was the end of the first half of 8th grade). I was still kind of in my emo phase, but people were a lot nicer about Taylor Swift here than they were in Kansas City. I had kind of settled back down to being “normal” and Speak Now, again, helped with a lot. I started really dealing with depression and anxiety in eighth grade due to some bullying (again), so Long Live and Mean got me through that. did I mention that I was bullied into working on changing my slightly hick-ish accent in middle school? no? WELL IT HAPPENED. ANYWAYS! as eighth grade rolled into high school, my Speak Now obsession continued.

okay, now into high school. the best years of my life, but the worst years of my life. LET’S GET INTO IT. I was in marching band all four years of high school and when I first started, I met who I though was the love of my life. she (yes, I said she) was great and supported me and whoever I loved/whatever I was obsessed with, and she was a swiftie, so that was a plus. anyways, as the second half of my freshman year rolled around, my dad lost his job he’d had for a looooooong time (the one that moved us out to Colorado) and my depression got worse. my girlfriend tried to be there for me as much as she could and kept reminding me that Taylor was there, too, but it didn’t help much. I started self harming almost constantly and my multiple suicide attempts started. after freshman year was over and sophomore year began, my dad was still unemployed and I was still severely depressed. my relationship started growing into an emotionally abusive one and I thought my life was pretty much pointless until the Speak Now World Tour dates were released and I saw that Taylor was going to be in Denver three weeks after my fifteenth birthday! unfortunately, my family wasn’t able to afford any kind of tickets and all I got from the concert was a bunch of girls around my school bragging about it and wearing all the merchandise the next day. the next few months of my life were like that until Safe & Sound from The Hunger Games soundtrack was released. I bought that the day it came out because we had Christmas a day late and I got an iPod touch with an iTunes gift card, so of fucking course I would.

okay, let’s just move into the next era because I am going on and on and on here. so between the time Safe & Sound and Red were released, I had attempted suicide multiple times through extreme amounts of self harm and attempting to overdose, but clearly, none of them worked. I also marched in the Macy’s Thanksgiving Day Parade my sophomore year and tried killing myself and started starving myself after we got back for lord knows what reason. the only good thing about that trip was being in Time’s Square at the same time Taylor posted a picture of her in a taxi in Time’s Square. like, that’s it. anyways, the only thing that helped me through my sophomore year was the fact that I had Safe & Sound and The Hunger Games to make me feel like life was like, the least bit worth living.

ANYWAYS, I’m pretty sure it was my first week of my junior year, but Taylor had her livestream when she announced Red and that was the beginning of my life turning around. I was finally able to end my super emotionally abusive relationship with my ex girlfriend by playing We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together on Skype and then hanging up on her. thanks, Taylor, by the way! it made me feel so empowered and the countdown for the album gave me something to look forward to. I also remember coming home from school two days after my sixteenth birthday, watching Taylor sing Ronan, then hating my life. A N Y W A Y S. Red coming out was the best thing that ever happened to me, even though I couldn’t buy the physical copy until after school the day it came out. I did buy it on iTunes the night before and I’m pretty sure I posted it on Facebook, but you know, whatever. by the end of my junior year, I was doing a lot better in school than I had been doing my previous year and my mental health got quite a bit better. my last week of school, two of the local country radio stations (The Wolf and KYGO) started giving away tickets for the Red Tour concert in Denver, and after calling The Wolf THIRTEEN times on my cell phone on my last day of school, I won two tickets to see her (click this link to listen to it because my good friend recorded it and put it on SoundCloud). it was a definite turn around to my life. my ex, who was going with her friend, tried to get me to take her with me, but I took my best friend instead and texted her the lyrics to WANEGBT during WANEGBT because I was too savage for my own good. I also saw Mama Swift and cried, and Grant tried throwing me a guitar pick and it made it NOWHERE NEAR ME. but he tried. and it was great.

okay, senior year. sorry this is so long. I continued being obnoxiously obsessed with Red and the last two digits of my locker were 22 and the last number of my locker combo was 13, so I though the Taylor Swift gods were blessing me for sure. ANYWAYS. I graduated from high school, which is something I never imagined I would be alive to do, but I made it through because Taylor made me feel so empowered with songs like IKYWT and WANEGBT and kept me away from my toxic ass ex girlfriend. BUT I GRADUATED. AND IT WAS GREAT. I WAS AND AM STILL SO PROUD OF MYSELF.

I’m just gonna long story short the rest of this because this is going on way too damn long. 1989 was announced and Shake It Off was released on a day I worked a night shift the night before, so I was like, wiped the hell out and actually asleep, but I partied hardy as soon as I woke up and ended up meeting someone who changed my life immensely because of it. I almost dated her, but I screwed that up and honestly, it’s probably for the better. the 1989 world tour rolled around and I didn’t win/couldn’t afford to buy tickets, so I just sat at home and read about it. I lived through the drama and the music videos, which made me feel like I had something to live for (again, I know that’s probably stupid), but at that point, I needed anything I could grasp onto. then I started therapy and antidepressant meds and started dealing with some gender dysphoria, which Taylor’s presence helped me through, until August. then I stopped my medication voluntarily and my self harm got bad. that was during the drought. it was fun. it was hard to find things to be happy about.

okay, fast forward to this year because I need to finish this. Taylor was basically nowhere to be seen and my depression and anxiety had gotten so bad, I had to do something about it myself. I found the courage and strength to put myself in an intensive outpatient program at a local behavioral health facility and while Taylor’s sexual assault trial triggered some very upsetting PTSD and guilt/shame, I graduated from the program two weeks ago. then, shortly after, this new era started.

okay, to make a long story short, I just realized I’ve been able to stay alive during all of her eras and all of the drama she’s been attached to and if you would’ve asked me five years ago, I would’ve told you I wouldn’t have been alive to do that. I realized that I have survived crushes, heartbreaks, love, breakups, depression, anxiety, self harm, suicide attempts, loneliness, confusion, and pain with and mainly because of @taylorswift and I can’t begin to thank her enough for that.

again, I know she’ll probably never read this or see it on her dashboard or anything of that nature, but I just wanted to let everyone know that Taylor is not only a musical legend, but a lifesaver.

#taylor swift #fearless #speak now #red #1989 #reputation #swifie #swifties #my life story so far #sorry this was so obnoxious #I just wanted to put this out in the world #personal

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