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#even 3x09 like he's scared. he's So Scared before and after he jumps
raayllum · 6 months
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RAYLLUM S5 MEME:  quotes [1/4] 5x04, “the great bookery”
Rayla, we've been through a lot. And a lot has changed. Well, some things have changed. But... not everything.
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holly-benji · 3 years
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MY CHENFORD THOUGHTS
I think the situation for Lucy and Tim is a bit complicated at the moment, even if the direction it has taken is clear. I think they will be able to solve the questions posed in the premiere by the end of the season (one of them for example is about the feelings one has towards the other) and I think we could even get to see a kiss between the two. But I don't think anything happened during the time jump, on the contrary I am quite convinced that they both try to hide what happened, and try in vain to put it behind them. Now, I think the situation is complicated by what happened in episode 9 of the third season. The prank that Lucy threw may have repercussions here. How?
TIM'S POINT OF VIEW
Tim is a very grumpy person, and little inclined to relationships. After the failed marriage he was only able to have Rachel as "partner" and Lucy. Although with the first one he failed (I remain of the idea that they broke up) the relationship served to get Tim out of his shell and be ready for Lucy. During the prank situation we see a Tim rather skeptical of a possible relationship with Lucy (indeed in 3x09 he rejects her) but this dialogue however for me starts a series of conscience exams and I think it leads Tim to the awareness of having fallen in love with her. He has fallen before so he knows the feeling. In fact, during the joke Lucy points out to Tim about her concern when she goes undercover. And what happens in episode 14? She goes undercover, and he's scared (he calls all the cops in town if you remember, because she doesn't give the check at midnight). And so that may have opened up questions in him ... "Lucy was right, I'm afraid she's going UC", and trying to answer we arrive at Angela’s wedding. When he sees her, have we seen Tim's looks? Other than x-rays! And then we come to 4x01. At that moment he realizes that he is romantically involved with her, but he gets stuck for three reasons. - she doesn't feel the same things (she threw the joke, and she laughed at a possible relationship between the two) - he is a messy, difficult person. He wouldn't be the right person for her. - you cannot have relationships in the district, especially between recruit and TO.
LUCY’S POINT OF VIEW
For Lucy it is the first alarm bell, also the first person she fully fall in love with. In fact, if for Tim the alarm has already arrived in 3x14, it comes with her now. She is literally petrified. Now in this situation Lucy wanted to go talk to Tim, but in the future she will question more about what she felt that night, and surely she will wonder if he feels the same feelings as her. And the answer she will give will be NO, because he rejected her in 3x09. So she will think that her feelings are only hers on her part, and that he is not in the least interested in her.
So they both try to ignore what happened. For me they will only succeed in part until Episode 4 or 5. When they return to being partners at work. I also think that finally getting to know the Lucy Nolan relationship of the first season (which I did not like) and Rachel can somehow shake things up. Tell me your opinion.
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londonrih · 3 years
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⚠️ warning this is the LONGEST RANT I’ve ever made this is also my first rant⚠️
Okay I have to rant about this because it’s driving me insane. I’m so sorry, I wrote a whole entire book, but I NEEDED to rant!!
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1. Why do the writers ALWAYS put John in these ridiculous relationships!!? Every season John has a new girlfriend, LIKE WHAT- um John, sweetie… at this point stop dating you can’t even keep a girl. I liked Grace, I feel like she should’ve stayed. They knew eachother from the beginning and it didn’t seem like they were COMPLETE strangers.
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2. Why put John in horrendous relationships but not give us chenford?? Like most of the ‘The Rookie’ fandom joined/ watches the show because of chenford!(👏🏾), most of us don’t want to see John get a girl, and break up for some stupid reason. Plus John has a whole 20+ year old son, he’s about to get married, like sir, I feel like it’s your time to stop dating and focus on your career. Didn’t Jessica leave John because he didn’t want to be a father again? Miss Ma’am!!!!!! HE HAS A 20yr old son! He’s done having babies🤦🏾‍♀️, so she walked away and John and Grace started dating, just for her to leave at the very end of season 2, for her son Oliver, and she “got back together” with her ex, I feel like it’s stupid, but you do you sis I won’t judge even though I just did, 🤷🏾‍♀️😬. So now John is dating Bailey and she doesn’t really sit right with me….
3. Why Bailey DOESNT sit right with me: She legit came to John’s door wearing a towel, like ummm ok. She said the dog got back into the house, and she was locked out, *confusion overload*😭, like if the dog got back into the house then you could’ve done the same🤦🏾‍♀️. THEN she asks John if he lives alone, like yeah, why do you ask? She does ask John for confirmation if he’s a serial killer or not, not AS suspicious, cause girl same I would’ve asked the same thing😬, ANYWAYSS, throwback to when we found out Tim was gonna be a sergeant🥳🥳🥳, I’m excited for that!! It’s obvious that they have a scene together, I’m kinda scared though… like I’ve just been thinking like: What it Bailey tries to hit on Tim, like NO SIS BACK OFF🙄, we’re trying to get chenford you aren’t about to mess this up!! So I just want Bailey to: STAY FAR AWAY from Tim, don’t talk to Tim, and don’t even look at Tim. I’ve been waiting tooo long for Chenford even though I started watching ‘The Rookie’ about 7 months ago, (March 28th), re-watched all of season 3, and I instantly fell for chenford, when the promo of 3x09, ‘Amber’ was released I yelled “I CALLED IT!” Rewatched season 1&2 during the hiatus in about a week or two, and boom now I’m a hardcore chenford shipper🥰. So Bailey better not crush my chenford dreams and hopes!! Even though with all the chenford from last week’s episode I think we’re getting chenford this season 🤞🏾🙏🏾.
4. With the time jump that happened, I feel like it should’ve been a 2-parter, so many questions still need to be answered!
Q1: after the chenford scenes we got , you’re telling me nothing happened during those 3 months??
Q2: even though they showed his grave, (miss you Jackson💕🙏🏾🕊), will there be like some type of memorial of Jackson? Will they do a episode dedicated to Jackson? Like it’s their first time celebrating Jackson’s birthday even though he isn’t here to celebrate with us..
Q3: who told Angela about Jackson’s death? And how did she react towards that? Jackson is going to miss out on SO many important moments throughout the entire season.
Q4: it doesn’t have to do with the time jump, but I just want to see this happen during an episode;
When will we get to see like maybe a brother or a sister for Tim? I just realllllllllllly wanna meet his family (for chenford purposes😂).
One last rant: Lucy’s crappy parents are coming back, so does that mean they find out what happened to J, and they’re like “we want you OUT of the program ASAP, find a new job, become a doctor its what we want!” Jackson stood up to Lucy’s parents before but now he’s deceased , so who will step up to her parents with her? Tim, perhaps🤔😁(pleaseeeeeeee!!!!!!)
Okay that’s my rant! What are your thoughts??? See you later!
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Merlin & Arthur’s friendship: clichés versus reality (Part II)
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Following on from Merlin & Arthur’s friendship: clichés versus reality Part I, here is part II. 
CLAIM #3: Arthur *constantly* denied that Merlin was his friend
This claim assumes that Arthur was 1)- serious when he did deny being friends with Merlin and 2)- unwilling to change that viewpoint.
Arthur had no need to either deny or admit to being friends with Merlin. Even when he said in episode 2x13 that, “I know I’m a Prince, so we can’t be friends,” the implication is that he does want to be friends. After all, he was insisting that Merlin confide in him. This pattern would repeat in many episodes to come. 
Bear in mind that Arthur has described other people as friends, too. This includes people we never saw onscreen. A clear example comes from episode 5x05, when Arthur was so moved with grief by Sir Ranulf’s death that he personally led a collection of knights to bring the sorcerer Osgar to justice. He explained to Gwen that “...he was a friend. We knew each other as boys.”
So why would Arthur have trouble admitting that Merlin was his friend? The viewpoint that being more arrogant and prejudiced in the earlier seasons, Arthur would not admit to friendship with a servant, does not hold as much water as some think. As early as episode 2x05, Arthur called Merlin a “true friend”, because he (mistakenly) thought that Merlin was criticising Lady Catrina on his behalf. 
Admittedly, the best examples of Arthur accepting Merlin as a friend come from Seasons 4 and 5. 
In episode 4x01, Merlin said, “I always thought that if things hadn’t been different, we’d have been good friends.” Arthur’s response? “Yeah.” During the crucial episode 4x03, Merlin sat outside the throne room all right, facing a crossroads between the end of his dreams and remaining loyal to the king. Of course, Arthur had no idea about this, but he appreciated the gesture. “You are a loyal friend, Merlin.” In episode 4x05, Arthur called Merlin “old friend”, which is self-explanatory. 
It’s also worth noting that even after claiming in episode 4x05 that he didn’t need friends, when Merlin later said, “I’m your friend!”, Arthur did not disagree. 
Now, I could cite the example of episode 4x07, where Arthur said to Merlin, “I’ve had my heart broken once today. I don’t want to lose another friend.” Self-explanatory. But was this proof of their friendship? No. Arthur was essentially threatening to end his friendship with Merlin if the latter continued criticising Agravaine. Later, in episode 4x11, Arthur again threatened to banish Merlin for the second time (thus ending their friendship) if he accused Agravaine of treason again. This once again shows how Arthur associated loyalty with family first. 
One of the best examples comes from episode 4x13: “I came back because you’re the only friend I have, and I couldn’t bear to lose you.” Is Merlin Arthur’s only friend? No. However, out of all Arthur’s friends, Merlin was his best friend, and losing almost everyone and everything else made him realise that yet again. 
Then we have all the actions which prove Arthur considered Merlin as a friend. 
For example relied on Merlin’s opinion, as Princess Mithian rightly observed in episode 4x11. “One thing I’ve learned since being here is that Arthur values your opinion above almost all others.” 
He complained about Merlin’s periods of silence and broodiness, like in episode 3x05: “Come on: I’m missing your usual prattle!” In episode 3x09, after noting that Merlin was upset, he said, “For goodness’ sake, what is your problem?”
Another example comes from episode 5x01, where Arthur noted Merlin sitting outside the camp and took the time to find out why he was “so upset”. 
The example from episode 5x05 is self-explanatory: “Seriously, I haven’t seen you smile these past three days.” Arthur relies on Merlin’s cheerfulness to remain optimistic, because he faces the constant threat of death. Notice that shortly after Merlin’s sombre mood, Arthur stopped dismissing Osgar’s warnings about The Disir.
As if this were not enough, look at Arthur spending downtime with Merlin. A great example comes from episode 3x04, where Arthur decides on “a nice, cold tankard of mead” after hunting. In episode 3x13, both were sitting on the courtyard steps discussing the future of the kingdom. Even despite his strenuous denials and ingratitude in episode 4x05, you can see Arthur gesture for Merlin to sit down the morning after they captured Caerleon.
What about all the hunting trips? Arthur knows that Merlin hates hunting (in fact, he takes pleasure in this fact), yet still brought him along, as episodes 1x13, 3x04, 4x11, 5x03, and 5x11 show. 
By far my favourite example comes from episode 5x12, when Arthur and Merlin were playing dice at the tavern. (I don’t know iwhat this game was called.) In my view, this happened regularly. Why else would the common people watch and laugh while Merlin poked fun at their king? (Percival’s face was classic.) And why was Arthur playing against Merlin? When did Merlin learn how to play dice? Who taught him? When? 
Obviously, I do not know, but it’s worth asking. 
Despite being speechless after Merlin “won” the game, Arthur let Merlin “win” all of his money. (Clearly, Arthur was the better player: “Feel free to retire at any time.” The king only used theatrics to get the right dice roll, while Merlin cheated with magic each time. If Merlin hadn’t “coughed”, then Arthur would have rolled correctly a second time. Hence why Arthur said beforehand, “Enjoy this moment, Merlin… while it lasts.”) 
Look at Arthur, who was dressed in a plain shirt, rather than his armour and cloak. When we put this scene in conjunction with episode 3x04, where Arthur again wore plain clothes, we can see that he enjoyed these moments of normality. “There’s no better place to measure the mood of your people than the local tavern… I’m just a simple peasant like everybody else.”
So where is this strenuous denial? Nowhere. Arthur never constantly denied that Merlin was his friend. Nor did he only admit this in secret, otherwise the great dice scene in episode 5x12 would never have happened. Sure, the people might have been astonished to see their great king playing against a servant, but they must also have known that if Arthur allowed himself to be “beaten” at a game by his servant, the latter must be his friend. 
CLAIM #4: Merlin was usually/always (in the) right
Wrong. Being right most of the time does not mean being right all of the time. Merlin failed to realise this, and consequently made grievous errors throughout the series. The most grievous errors came when he tried to fight against death. Episode 3x05 shows this; all of the grief and pain suffered by Arthur, Gwen, and Uther stemmed from Merlin mortally injuring Morgana in a bid to prevent her from killing the king. 
He effectively ignored the warning to “use what you see for good.” 
Then we have the example to end all examples; Merlin’s recklessness, presumptuousness, bold-faced hypocrisy, coldness, prejudice, and most of all, jealousy towards Sir Mordred. 
Even as early as episode 1x08, Merlin almost let the boy Mordred die on account of a prophecy. At least back then he questioned it before hiding in bed like a coward. Mordred also blamed Merlin for Uther’s carnage in episode 2x11, though in the case of that episode and episode 2x03, I think Merlin’s actions were no worse than presumptuous. 
It gets far worse in episode 5x02, when Merlin yelled, “You should have killed him!”, to which Arthur rightly said, “What is wrong with you?” Mordred saw that he could not jump across the gorge, so he surrendered and walked away. (He probably knew that Arthur would arrive in Ismere soon, as his later conversation with Morgana demonstrates.) 
Later on, Arthur gave Merlin another strange look after Merlin said, “I told you, you should have killed him when you had the chance.” How could someone usually so compassionate insist on executing a man who stopped threatening them?
Remember how Merlin reacted to Arthur killing Caerleon in episode 4x05, despite having plenty of evidence that Caerleon was a threat to Arthur’s life?
By the way, episodes 5x01 and 5x02 are my favourite examples of Merlin being horrendously wrong. Other episodes include 5x05, and the crucial errors he made in episode 5x11. (I watched most of episode 5x11 last Sunday, and I was floored. It shook me more than 5x12 and 5x13, which I had also been avoiding for years.) 
Going back to episodes 5x01 and 5x02 (because episode 5x11 is too depressing): if Arthur had listened to Merlin’s “advice”, he would have abandoned his knights to a slow death in slavery. He would also have committed murder, simply on Merlin’s say-so. If you kill someone who is defenceless and has surrendered, that is murder-- regardless of whether, like Merlin, you are desperately scared of a prophecy and speaking without thinking. 
Also, if Arthur had rushed back to Camelot on Merlin’s say-so, he might well have been assassinated by Ruadan. 
Most of all, almost everything that Merlin “advised” violated Arthur’s core beliefs-- the very beliefs that made Merlin respect Arthur in the first place. It’s astonishing that Arthur had to explain no less than five times that he would never abandon any of his men, otherwise he would be abandoning his own values and the values that built Camelot. 
So desperate is Merlin to fight against death that he either quietly ignores this advice, or claims he agrees, only to try dissuading Arthur later on. 
Just to be clear: I perfectly understand that beneath all Merlin’s horrible advice and prevarication, he does not want to lose his friend. 
However, just watch Merlin’s marvellous inconsistency throughout episode 5x01. First, he plays Devil’s Advocate by asking Arthur, “Do you really think Gwaine and Percival could still be alive?” Arthur says he has to find out, because they are knights of Camelot. Merlin says, “I understand.” Of course he did. 
Bear in mind that this happened before Merlin learned of the prophecy. Some have therefore asked what made Merlin unwilling to look for the missing knights, who were his friends. 
In Annis’ castle, Merlin said, “I’m not sure we should go to Ismere.” On the other hand, Arthur, acting on reliable information that Morgana had rounded up slaves, took this as a sign that his mission was right. Merlin tried arguing, then gave up. One might assume that after two rational explanations, Merlin would see reason, particularly since even Kilgharrah could not confirm that the fated battle would take place. 
But no. After the knights left Annis’ lands, Merlin complained again that Morgana was “powerful… dangerous.” So, Arthur explained yet again that “no matter what lies ahead of me, I won’t abandon them.” Merlin respected this answer, because he said, “I understand. I wish I didn’t-- but I do.” (Why does he wish he did not understand why Arthur would risk his life for all of his soldiers?) 
But the very next day, after the ambush, Merlin turned to rage: “The two of us against Morgana, are you mad?” He tried stopping Arthur from going any further. So Arthur explained himself again. Consequently, Merlin continued following Arthur. 
The very same night, he once again insisted that, “We have to turn back.” Arthur explained himself yet again, and Merlin promised to “protect you or die at your side.”
Which one is it? Not to mention that in episode 5x02, instead of apologising for his carelessness, Merlin said, “And I told you to go back to Camelot.” This is silly, given that Arthur had already refused to return on numerous occasions until he had rescued his men, assuming they were still alive. 
The most hilarious example comes later, when Merlin says, “We can’t let them hand us over to Morgana: we need to get out of here, we need a plan.” But when Arthur comes up with that plan, what does Merlin say? “You’ve got to be joking!”, “You should have killed him!”, “Next time, we might not be so lucky.”, “We’ll never make it in there.”, and “How did you talk me into this?” 
Again, which one is it?
I know why Merlin behaved this way, of course. However, there’s a difference between the noble goal of protecting your friend, and ignoring everything and everyone else in order to reach that goal-- particularly through controlling means. Throughout the series, Merlin’s biggest fault comes from his controlling tendencies, which always backfire. And he never learns.  
In this way, Merlin shackled Arthur with unrealistic expectations about a Golden Age based on prophecies that he could not verify. Somehow, this Golden Age had now become evading Arthur’s death. He wanted Arthur to share that belief. Worse, even while his motives came from a noble goal, he treated other people as expendable. 
Another example of Merlin’s absurd reasoning comes from the fateful episode 5x05. Putting aside the fact that Merlin tried claming that sentencing Mordred to die was an acceptable price to pay “for Camelot”, he also previously claimed that, “I do care. About who you are, Arthur. Who you are destined to become.” 
This makes zero sense, given that Arthur had already taken the throne and “brought peace to the kingdom” (episode 5x03). What more did he have to achieve? It depends on who you ask: bringing back magic, uniting the five kingdoms, eternal peace, avoiding the prophecy about Mordred, bowing to the Triple Goddess, being the greatest king this land has ever known… 
Can you see how unrealistic this is? Moreover, can you see how Merlin used Arthur as a vehicle of his own unrealistic ambitions? This is why the Golden Age never happened: it was a myth. It allowed the Druids, Gaius, Kilgharrah, etc. to live vicariously through the new king. 
Bringing back magic was impossible while Morgana continued using it for great evil. (And the Triple Goddess, who complained about Arthur persecuting sorcery, allowed Morgana to continue that evil conduct.)
Arthur did take considerable steps to uniting the kingdoms, particularly when he signed a treaty with King Odin in episode 5x04. But eternal peace? Impossible, otherwise episodes 5x01 and 5x02 would not have happened. 
The unbiquitous prophecy about Mordred was never backed by evidence, leaving Merlin in a state of constant paranoia, and causing him to make horrible errors. This despite the fact that, by his own admission, “I like him [Mordred] myself.” [1]
Bowing to the Triple Goddess was nothing but blackmail using Mordred’s life as a bargaining chip. This once again shows how many sorcerers had caused chaos and misery. Remember, this same Triple Goddess used torture techniques such as controlling people’s minds using the Fomorroh, as Morgana explained in episode 4x06. 
While I believe that the persecution of peaceful sorcerers was wrong, Arthur had no quarrel with the Druids (episode 5x11), and he still had good reason for banning sorcery (also explained in episode 5x11). Nobody, not even Merlin, gave him a reason to change his mind. Kara definitely did not, for she wasn’t executed for being a Druid: she was executed for murder and attempted murder. 
As for being the greatest king this land had ever known… Well, Arthur appreciated that statement in episode 4x12. However, when Merlin spoke of the greatest kingdom in the world in episode 4x13, Arthur said, “You’re making this up.”
In episode 5x01, Merlin claimed that, “Arthur, without you, Camelot is nothing.” Arthur disagreed, saying that abandoning his men was worse than surviving Morgana. Even in episode 5x04, Arthur accepted his death. “So be it. But understand this, Odin: you kill me, and you’ll have all of Camelot to answer to.” Odin was astonished that a king could have such confidence in the face of death. 
The most important example comes from episode 5x13. Merlin said the same thing about Camelot being nothing without Arthur, to which the dying king said, “There was a time when that was true. Not now. There are many who can fill the crown.” And of course, he gave the royal seal to Gwen. Can anyone argue with this? 
I guess you could say that Arthur didn’t believe his own hype.
Indeed, Arthur felt satisfied about what he had achieved in his life. “Everything you’ve done, I know now. For me, for Camelot. For the kingdom you helped me build.” (Episode 5x13). That was it. Arthur knew that he had changed Camelot for the better, that Merlin killing his half-sister had brought “peace at last”, and that he owed Merlin an unpayable debt for helping him to achieve all of these goals. 
Why did Arthur accept the certainty of his death for so long? Because he believed his cause was right, and his death would help save the lives of thousands in Camelot. Dying in service to Camelot was his real destiny. It was inevitable, and to him, it was the most honourable act he would ever undertake. 
You cannot know how great you will be until you die. “That’s the way things work, I’m afraid. You get the glory when you’re not around to appreciate it.” (Episode 4x06). At that point, you will never see your legacy. Merlin either did not know that, or he did not want to know it. 
Arthur’s death ultimately serves as the greatest evidence that Merlin was wrong the whole time.
TO BE CONTINUED IN PART III
FOOTNOTES
[1]  I don’t doubt that Merlin liked Mordred. In fact, the scene in episode 5x05, where Merlin buried Osgar, shows how difficult it was for him to maintain his mistrust when the druid was so polite and perceptive. So why the contradiction? Why claim you like someone, yet insist that they would commit regicide? The answer is that Merlin used the prophecy as an excuse. In fact, his prejudice against Mordred had more to do with jealousy than the prophecy. After being involved in an attempt to trade Arthur and Merlin as slaves to Morgana, Arthur knighted the druid for one noble act. Did Merlin aspire to be a knight? I don’t know. He definitely wanted that same level of trust and respect given to Mordred, though, and knighthood created a bond that a servant could not have.
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kingbuckley · 4 years
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Alright you guys this turned into an absolute monster of a fic rec. It’s organised by word count in descending order, and ALL FICS HAVE A HAPPY ENDING!! i don’t read fics that don’t end happy so even if a fic seems scary you can rest assured it ends fine if it’s here.
Special shoutout to @thisissirius (same ao3 handle) and @getbvcked (attolians (annber) on ao3) i have all their fics bookmarked so i didn’t include them individually in this list but you should check them out because every fic they put out is amazing. 
the rest is under the cut:
Breaking and Entering by AngelCuttingOnions (g/1k): Have you ever been terrified to lose something that isn’t even yours? Digging helplessly at the mud with your bare hands, so determined not to let go, not to give up. Your heart going so fast you think it might just beat out of your chest.
in any place you'll allow by barelyprolific (m/1k): Cleaning duty has never looked as good as Evan Buckley waxing floors.Or, Eddie Diaz finally makes his move.
Care and Keeping by BlackRose (m/1k): Eddie's alive, but he almost wasn't. Buck's determined to keep him safe now more than ever. Eddie, wants Buck to feel seen.
Cool for the Summer by Onlymystory (e/1k): Buck comes over to apologize to Eddie. It's a very good apology.
fireworks have nothing on you by inkandella (nr/1k): Buck’s tears had dried not too long ago, but his hands still shook as he wrung them. Bobby had just left to deal with, well, everything, but Buck remained by the truck, refusing to drag his eyes from Eddie for even a second. Eventually it was just Hen and Chim that remained, and Buck could finally see Eddie clearly. The man’s face was streaked with mud, dirt, and blood, his shoulders were bowed and eyes stared blankly off somewhere ahead of him. Buck bit his lips, but it didn’t really help him from asking again. “Is he okay?”Or; Buck finally does something about it.
Hotel Complaints and Grievances Raised by asexual-fandom-queen (m/2k): After a night out with the 118, Eddie wakes up with Buck naked in bed, and a barrage of feelings to face.
fight so dirty/love so sweet by homewrecker (m/2k): Buck and Eddie go for the title.
YOUR MOUTH IS HEAVEN by AgnesClementine (t/2k): A tongue piercing. Buck has a tongue piercing. Which is fine. Totally fine. Eddie is absolutely not going to lose sleep because of that information.
Zoom Into My Heart by Shaniamr (m/2k): Buck didn't know that zoom shared your private chats at the end of the meeting, but he's about to find out.
collisions in the dark by Marcia Elena (marciaelena) (e/2k): Eddie and Christopher spend the night at Buck's. Coda to 3x09.
What do you need? by RealOrFiction (e/2k): Buck has needs. Needs that haven't been met in a while.
Great Game by LovelyLittleGrim (e/2k): Buck’s watching him, waiting for some type of response. “Scared, Diaz?”“I don’t have any reason to be scared, Buckley.” He meets Buck’s eyes, lips quirked and murmurs, “I always come out on top.”
Buck Wild by Ithinkwehaveanemergency (m/2k): Eddie accidentally finds out that his best friend, coworker, and secret crush has done gay porn.
no greater joy by elisela (g/2k): When he wakes again, he finds Buck and Christopher out in the backyard, snuggled into the hammock that Buck had brought over months earlier, the day after Christopher had offhandedly mentioned that he’d been in one during a camping trip once and liked it. Buck was fooling no one when he said he’d happened to find it in storage, and Eddie had helped him set it up immediately, basking in the second-hand glow of Buck’s complete adoration of his son.
No Rest for the Wicked by Wassereis (e/2k): Eddie gets home early. What he finds wasn't what he expected.
people who love the same by templemarker (t/2k): Buck was just reheating a plate for Eddie when he heard a very familiar snort behind him."Okay, what now," he said expectantly."So," Hen drawled, "you have one plate on the counter, steaming, already had a couple of bites. And now you've got a second plate," she gestured at the microwave to the reheating lasagne, "and we all know who that plate's for."Buck looked at her, tilting his head. "I mean, I always make a plate for Eddie," he said, confused.
One Week by elisela (g/3k): Christopher's week revolves around Buck.
wherever I'm with you by anonymous (g/3k): In which Buck can't settle down in his own apartment until he realizes the true meaning of the word home.Or; Sleeping is easier when it's with Eddie.
To Be Whole by mansikka (t/3k): They say that when you and your soulmate are ready to meet, whatever they write on their skin will appear on yours, and vice versa. Which Buck thinks is bullshit. Right up until words start appearing on his arm.
Pull The Pin by islandgirl (g/3k): Everything they've been feeling and not saying is like a grenade between them and damn it all, Buck is ready to pull the pin, let the explosion happen and for everything to fall into place.
Long Overdue by mansikka (m/3k): Eddie realizes his feelings for Buck are more than platonic; what's he supposed to do now?
you could write this love in stone by chocolatebirdie (nr/4k): "Whatever happens, after tonight, I just want you to know that your friendship has meant everything to me. You’re my best friend, Eddie. You and Chris are – are like family to me. And I’m really grateful to have met you both.”“Why does this sound like you’re breaking up with me?” Eddie asks. The confusion-amusement ratio has started to skew towards the former, with an added dose of concern. Well maybe if he’d shut up and let Buck talk, Eddie wouldn’t be so puzzled.Did he have to use the phrase “break up,” though? Buck’s not sure he can stand the implication.
you can always be found by chocolatebirdie (nr/4k): Abby's back in LA, and she keeps trying to get in touch with Buck. The only problem? He's literally always with Eddie.
Until the Dancing Ends by suyari (g/4k): It’s been the strangest day of his life to date.Or the one where everyone's seen the footage of the rescue but Eddie.
when the hardest part is over by Anonymous (g/4k): “It’s okay,” Buck rasps out, tight against Eddie’s ear. “We got you back. We got you. You’re safe.”It sounds like he’s reassuring himself as much as Eddie – might even be saying it for Christopher’s sake even though the boy is blissfully unaware of what’s happened tonight. A mantra spoken to the night like a victory speech, a reminder that it could take nothing away from them.
Not Done by red_to_black (nr/4k): Buck volunteered to get into the ambulance with him, knowing the risks. He's pinching the guy's skin and saying, "Take it out," and Eddie, for the first time since leaving the military, feels it - a connection. A kindred spirit. A purpose that tethers him to reality. A person relying on him to get the job done.(or - a list of things Eddie Diaz couldn't give up on, including himself.)
Talk About It by DoneInLove (e/4k): You want to send me your dickpic?Just to see if it looks okay. Buck starts sending Eddie his dick pics before he sends them to other people.Eddie doesn't know why he decided this was a good idea.
Guessing Game by Arsenal (t/4k): Buck overhears Eddie telling his mother that he has feelings for someone and drives himself nuts trying to figure out who is possibly could be. aka yet another oblivious Buck fic
Happy Buck Day by Jecari (g/5k): After pushing the balloons tied to Christopher's crutch away, Eddie finds his best friend frowning, mouth agape. Buck looks adorable."It's not my birthday," Buck points out after shaking his head."We know," Christopher laughs.
Buck Is My Warrior by elisela (g/5k): “We’ll be filming a special edition of American Ninja Warrior,” Troy announces after the introduction to the current contestant ends, “focused on our brave first responders. Go to our website to find out more details and how to submit your videos.”Oh.“Buddy,” Eddie says, “I don’t really know if that’s my thing.”Christopher looks at him, then down at his feet and mumbles something.“Didn’t catch that, kiddo,” Eddie says, reaching out and pressing two fingers under Chris’ chin to tilt his face back up.“I said,” Christopher says, “I want to nominate Buck.”
Eddie Diaz and the Cat-astrophe at the 118 by SquaresAreNotCircles (g/5k): It’s Chimney who rescues her from the tree, but it’s Bobby’s arms that she curls up in on the drive over to the vet to get her checked out. Right from the start, it’s as if she knows who she needs to cozy up with to secure her spot at the station.“Come on, that’s crazy,” Buck says, but he does so while laughing not at Eddie, but at the grey tabby cat trying to get her claws on the fake mouse on a string that Buck bought with his own money, so Eddie doesn’t put too much stock in his opinion.Or: The firefam adopts a mascot and Eddie has a minor crisis about it.
Evan Buckley and a Series of Unintended Consequences by Shaniamr (e/6k): Buck has been hurt on the job and has lost the ability to use his hands while they heal. Eddie jumps at the opportunity to help Buck with anything he needs. Anything.
Love Language by red_to_black (nr/6k): The one in which there's too much pollen around, Eddie pines, and Buck is oblivious.Or - Eddie's love language is acts of service, and Buck doesn't totally get it.
The Other Woman by MomentsOfWeakness (t/6k): Buck has been unlucky in love lately and he can't figure out why. It takes a phone call from Eddie and an interrupted date for him to finally put the pieces together.
My Favorite Place Is Inside Your Hug by Lopithecus (e/7k): When Eddie gets stuck in a hole while trying to rescue a kid, he remembers Afghanistan and how many people were lost. Luckily he has Buck in his corner to help him get through the memories.
give me strength so i can see by see_addy_write (t/7k): After the tsunami, Buck is sure Eddie won't want him anywhere near Christopher -- or himself. Both of the Diaz boys have something to say about that.
haircut to the heart by itsmylifekay (nr/8k): 5 times Buck cuts Christopher’s hair and 1 time Christopher helps cut his.
In the Aftershock by hideeho (t/8k): When Eddie is injured on the job, Buck is forced to face the fallout.
Slow Your Thinking by an_alternate_world (e/10k): Eddie has the itch to fight, the discomforting unease of needing to release all his negativity again making it difficult to concentrate on the calls. Buck suggests an alternative: surrendering his need for control to Buck for a while.
Just For This Moment by suyari (m/10k): “Take your time,” Carla said sternly. “Don’t rush this because you’re worried, Buck, do you hear me? Any change in your scent could just set him off.”“Yes, thank you, I know how to deal with Alphas,” he drawled.“Yes, but Eddie’s not just another Alpha and I think it’s time we acknowledged that.”
You Are Safe (With Me) by BabylonsFall (g/10k): Or: 5 times Eddie waltzed into Buck's apartment like he owned it, and 1 time Buck tried
you waltz through my bloodstream by wayfarer (t/2k): Buck gets a boyfriend and Eddie is totally fine with that. Really.
can't fight that feeling by Anonymous (e/11k): “We have to keep this quiet,” he realizes.“That’s,” Eddie starts, his eyebrows tilting inwards adorably. “I mean, yeah, if that’s what you wanna do, then—”“Not for long,” Buck protests. “I’m thinking until tomorrow.”The eyebrows rise with interest; the eyes beneath get their spark back. “Yeah?”“It’s Maddie and Chimney’s wedding day,” Buck says, slipping his hands down the last bit and entwining them with Eddie’s. “Today should be solely about them, about their love. You and I can have tomorrow. All the tomorrows.”
Just Hold Me Well by Lobotomite (m/11k): It was meant to be a fun little trip with his 118 family; no stress, no drama, and certainly no sexuality-redefining fumbles that make him realize his more than platonic feelings towards his best friend. But, well, when has anything ever gone according to plan for Buck?
a leaf falls on loneliness by iimpossible_things (nr/11k): Buck doesn’t think that if he were to say, “I’m in a bad place”, that anyone would turn him away. Really, he doesn’t. The 118 has too many good, kind people for that.But every time he wants to open his mouth, to say something, to reach out to Eddie or Bobby or Hen or Chim, he hears Eddie yelling, “you’re exhausting.”—you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting—So each day he does his job and he laughs and he jokes and he pretends he’s the care-free goofball he’s always been. And each day he packs away his bruises and his worries, takes them home to his empty loft with its quiet rooms, and licks his wounds in silence.
Darling It's Better (Down Where It's Wetter) by Onlymystory (e/20k): "Who the hell is that?" asks Buck. Like he doesn't know exactly who that is. Like a week ago he wasn't enjoying one of the best fucks of his life with Eddie Diaz. Or the reason for Buck's surprise at the new recruit isn't quite for the reasons everyone thinks.
i think i might've inhaled you by ariquitecontrary (m/20k): How do you tell your best friend that you're actually in love with them? If you're Evan Buckley, you don't.
dancing under red skies by dayswithout (g, 30k) Buck hates Eddie Diaz on sight.aka, a soulmate au. (Eddie’s POV; g/15k)
dancing under red skies by dayswithout (g/30k): Buck hates Eddie Diaz on sight.aka, a soulmate au.
The Education of Eddie Diaz by mansikka (e/30k): Eddie doesn't really know how it happened. One moment the 118 are drunk in a bar after a hard shift, confessions slipping from his mouth as he playfully kisses Buck on the cheek. The next he is on Buck's couch, taking up Buck's offer of an education that could be asking for trouble. But it's just sex, and they're just friends; it doesn't mean anything to either of them. So why is his time alone with Buck the highlight of his week?
Guess We'll Just Have to Adjust by CocoBadShip (m/30k): No, Buck does not have a damn crush on Eddie fucking Diaz. No, Buck is not thinking about Eddie's stupid smile or his stupid hair or that obscene sound he made when he pushed the couch the way he did.Having a crush would be weird. And dumb. And the last thing Buck needs in his already fucked up life.
tagging those of you who requested @lafdbuckley @casscent @googoodreamers
and some mutuals because why not @eddiediazs @judsonryder @fierydeans @buckleystrand
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travllingbunny · 5 years
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AoS rewatch:  1x06 FZZT
And with this, we start that season 1 thing with spelling words in titles as if they were acronyms, though this one is only typed in capital letters but without the periods, unlike T.R.A.C.K.S.
This is the best episode of the first part of season 1, in spite of being one of the few that have no elements of the overall storyline. If all the early season 1 episodes were like this, no one would be saying anything against pre-Winter Soldier season 1. The standalone story is a great one, and it is full of important character moments and character development, Especially for Simmons and Fitz, and their relationship. This is where they stop being just comic relief supporting characters and become fully fledged characters.
Simmons later had a lot of inconsistent writing, but her characterization in this episode is perfect. It’s certainly one of her best episodes ever. We see everything from her rationality and scientific curiosity which can sometimes sound a bit creepy (”So sad a man died this way…and yet, so amazing.“), her determination and her courage and willingness to spare the others the responsibility to sacrifice her, by sacrificing herself to save everyone.
And it’s the first great FitzSimmons episode – where their relationship is in the focus and the heart of the story. There’s a lot of fun bickering, as there always is, but then we also get to see how much they mean to each other, how much Fitz is willing to risk for Jemma, and  we get the first hints he may be feeling something romantic for her.
One of the differences between Fitz and Jemma is how much is Fitz is grossed out by things like dead bodies (or  needles stuck into eyes, as in 1x04) while Simmons is cool and unaffected by them (but if she weren’t, it would be hard for her to do her job). I relate to Fitz in this case.
Simmons taunts him that he’s „afraid“ of a dead body, which angers him and he protests that he’s not afraid, just disgusted. Later, she says he was too afraid to go into the field. But when it comes to saving Simmons, Fitz is later completely unafraid to get into the lab with her and risk getting infected himself, and later wanted to jump off a plane to save her.
But before that, at the beginning of the episode, Fitz’ little crush on Skye gets its swan song as he makes a terrible attempt at hitting at her, which she doesn’t even register. She’s too busy talking about her problems with Ward – who has been ignoring her - and comparing him to her ex-boyfriend Miles, and she also has noticed the FitzSimmons chemistry before either of them have, pointing out that they are „psychically linked“. She has always been the world’s biggest FitzSimmons shipper.
Speaking of which, the ship name itself is again spoken in canon: just like the doc in the Pilot, Coulson refers to them as a single unit, „FitzSimmons“.
Fitz and Simmons’ impersonations of Ward are both terrible. Why do they make him sound like Edward James Olmos?
The only thing that feels out of place in this episode is May’s interrogation of one of the witnesses, who’s a little boy. It’s a humorous scene where she offers him a cookie, but looks completely intimidating while doing it. This doesn’t really make sense, as we know that May can be softer, and we now know that she is usually very caring with children. And scaring an already traumatized child shouldn’t be funny.
Indeed, Skye, I’m also shocked that neither Coulson nor Ward are familiar with The Big Lebowski. Well, actually, I’m not at all shocked that Ward hasn’t.
Foreshadowing: Ward: „Everyone looks clean on the first go round. Dig deeper“
At this point, I’m not sure if Ward is really still angry at Skye (I did believe he really was in 1x05, but only because he was jealous of Miles), or if he thinks that he now needs to continue his performance of being a strict, loyal SHIELD agent angered by Skye’s Rising Tide allegiance.
It’s a testament to how good this episode is, that it succeeds in making you feel for  Diaz, the firefighter about to die, a minor character who’s only been on screen for a couple of minutes. The writing and the acting is really good. This episode’s plot is so sad, because the victims are people who were heroes helping and saving others, and they died as an indirect result of that. It’s also possibly the only episode where the team isn’t dealing with any villains who intentionally caused this, but a virus and an accidental infection.
This is also one of the best episodes for Coulson. The scene where he stays with the dying firefighter as long as he can, to make it easier for him, telling him about his own death experience, is really beautiful. (We never find out if what he told him was true, or just something he said to make him feel better.) He cut off the comm with May when she tried to warn him to leave. He does something similar later when he pretends that he lost communications with Blake, because he has no intention of following the order to dump Simmons into the ocean, instead of hoping and believing that she will find the antiserum. And he openly defies Blake and the superiors’ orders at the end of the episode, even replying „Let them try“ when he’s threatened with SHIELD taking the team away from him. (I don’t know how Fury felt about Coulson disobeying his orders – but maybe he liked it, because, after all, he also disobeyed orders that he deemed to be stupid ass orders, like being told to bomb New York.) In spite of the many ways in which the later seasons improved the show, one of the things I’m sad about is that this humane, always compassionate season 1 Coulson was kind of lost, as he became darker and angrier, prone to keeping secrets even from his team, and occasionally too obsessed with revenge.
When watching Ward in these early episodes, the question constantly arises, what is real and what is fake. The speech he gives to Skye, about feeling helpless that he cannot protect his team members from someone, a superpowered psychopath, it is a part of his performance, but is there maybe some grain of truth in it? The best lies are usually those that have a bit of truth in them – an actor needs to find something to relate to give a better performance. Ward was deceiving and manipulating everyone, but at the same time, we know he did develop some feelings for at least some of his teammates. Not just romantic feelings for Skye, but it’s also canon (at least since 3x09) that he projected his little brother into Fitz. The same episode hinted he may have seen Simmons as a sister figure. (I personally believe that he projected his family on the team, which also explains his later negative feelings for them.) And he definitely has a hero complex and wants people to see him as a protector (whether or not this fits with the reality), this is how he defines himself and his worth – it’s one of the constants of his characters throughout the show.
First mention and appearance of Titus Welliver as Agent Felix Blake
We find out that FitzSimmons have never even passed their field assessments.
So many defining FitzSimmons moments. FitzSimmons sitting on the different sides of the lab door, separated.
That moment. That moment when they are arguing and Fitz starts saying that she has been always by his side, that they’ve spent every moment together (“You’ve been beside me the whole damn time!”) – and his face changes. That’s when he realizes just how much Simmons means to him. And it’s the moment when so many fans started shipping FitzSimmons.
It’s right after that he went into the lab with her to do everything to help her find a way to save herself „We’re gonna fix this together“
Fitz desperately yelling: „JEMMA!“ - I’m pretty sure that’s the first time on the show he has called her by her first name.
Going by what we’ve seen so far – countries SHIELD has offices in include Morocco and China, but apparently not Peru or Belarus (and, going by 4x14, no office in Russia, either).
I love the way Simmons corrects Ward about his imitation of her bad imitation of him.
Aw, the Skye-Simmons hug was sweet. The Bus Kids friendship was one of the things that the show developed very convincingly from the start, in a relatively small number of episodes.
In the ongoing story of Coulson worrying about his earlier death and comeback, he has ordered his own physical exam. This is so far the most tender May/Coulson scene, and the tenderest May has been in the show. (And I bet the writers were being intentionally naughty and ship-teasing when they put the„Take off your shirt“ line in there.)
The last scene, where Fitz is unhappy and a bit jealous that he didn’t  get to save Simmons from jumping, but Ward did instead (don’t worry, Fitz, Ward had a much better chance of succeeding there, let everyone play to their strengths), and Simmons reassures him that he was the one who did most to help and save her, being there with her in the lab, and gives him a cheek kiss… if Fitz didn’t realize before that his feelings for Jemma may be romantic, he is definitely starting to understand it here, going by that last shot of him, deep in thoughts.
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ilosttrackofthings · 7 years
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boooooooooooo for stressing, I do not support this, do not like. but yay for meme! for it: biospecialist and/or aos
send me a show/character/ship and I’ll tell you my top five moments
agents of shield
that time Daisy and Jemma were SO SCARED but also SO RELIEVED to find out neither of them was an LMD and they hugged and my heart cried and it was beautiful
that time Randolph called Jemma the most beautiful thing he’d seen in a thousand years and no one blamed him or questioned it
that time Hunter found out his ex-wife, who he’d spent WEEKS badmouthing to the team, was on the team and WAS THE ONE WHO TOLD COULSON HE WAS GOOD PEOPLE I’m still laughing about it
that time Robbie caught James’ flaming chain out of the air. I really don’t think I need to expand on the beauty of this moment
that time Trip and Jemma refused to become HYDRA and even though they’d only known each other a few days total, acted as a perfect team, totally in sync
special mention for that time Grant put friends first and which Amy can attest I often forget is not canon
and the biospec under the cut
biospecialist
the circling (3x09) - I am a humble raccoon and Grant creepily circling Jemma, sizing her up again after her time on Maveth, is always gonna be one of my favorites
“I made you a promise” (2x19) - how freaked out is Grant in that scene? He can barely compute what just happened and meanwhile Jemma is PROUD (her little smile when she nods? ohmygosh!) that she tried, even though she failed, even while she’s TERRIFIED
the fall (1x06) - not the jumping, the fall. That moment when we see her pulse and it’s clear it happens a while after he catches her because instead of being wrapped around each other, she’s in his arms and she pulses/passes out and he holds her up and just … best
TRACKS (1x13) - the WHOLE THING. She’s all worried over his injury and he HOLDS HER HAND while she looks at him with those big doe eyes while he tells her to go hide, he’ll protect her, then he’s all “I told Simmons I’d be back for them.” My HEART. Are the writers trying to KILL ME?
interruption (1x15) - there’s that little moment in Yes Men where Grant comes into the med pod to see Skye and you can SEE Jemma putting her feelings for him in a deep dark hole in the face of this obvious crush he has on Skye and I EAT IT UP
special mention for: last looks (3x09) - the up-and-down he gives her before going through the portal. I have NO IDEA what it means and that might be why I love it so
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