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#goddamn i wanna hold a babey rn
sw4tch · 2 years
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going on a date this weekend and I'm nervous/happy/scared but mostly i am annoyed that my intrusive thoughts keep yelling at me to "call him your babygirl" because How Do I Explain To My Brain that that is unacceptable and inappropriate behavior on a first date
Like, it is because of my heavy internet brainrot but CMONNNNNNN can we NOT
If he turns out to be submissive and breedable down the line, then maybe we can consider it BUT NOT RIGHT NOW!!!!!! (for legal reasons that is a comment made to lighten the mood).
In all seriousness, the guy seems nice and he's very sweet, so there's that at least.
My honest to god expectations are on the goddamn floor bcus if i don't get murdered then i will call it a successful date. That's it.
But i just had a good cry rn bcus i kept thinking about how the guy isn't the person i love and it made me so heartbroken.
But that's why we're on the dating scene! To move on! To be more respectful to myself! To get experience dating and feel like a mature adult! To grow up! To stop feeling so goddamn scared of socializing outside my usual circle! To live life! To feel fucking alive!
Live Laugh Love babey! I am so sad when i think about how i am planning to yearn for the rest of my life!
But also this is so goddamn scary! What if i really like this guy!!!! When the fuck do i tell him I'm not a woman!!!!!! He will fucking hate me!!!!!!!!!! He will be disgusted, or on maybe the nicest scenario, be like "huh sorry I'm not into that, it was nice to have some dates with you though, no hard feelings" which Understandable BUT I DONT WANNA GO THROUGH THAT
I hate this i hate this im so nervous and scared and angry and most of all I Feel So Alone
I didn't mean for this to turn into a vent, i just wanted to gush about how excited i was but
But also I'm having Big Bpd Feelings About This
I'm tired of feeling like I'll never be loved and wanted
I want to feel wanted
Don't we all?
I'm doing this to myself for my own good.
I cant keep yearning pointlessly.
Right. Right. Right. We can't keep doing this snaily.
Our promise of happiness... Means working towards our own happiness.
Our happiness. My happiness. We deserve that too. You deserve that too.
We deserve to be selfish too. In fact, it's not selfish. We're not doing anything wrong.
We're doing normal things.
It's okay to take your bags and seek comfort somewhere else.
Is it?
I dont
I don't want anyone else but them.
Isn't that the problem? Is it a problem?
I want to go to see the stars too. The sky lighting up with flashes of light. I want to hold someone's hand as I do so.
I don't want to be left in the dark anymore, forgotten and thrown away.
It's okay. I'm giving you permission.
You'll go on a date and you'll have fun, and if things go right, you'll get the most out of this relationship and you'll get to feel happy for a while. And isn't that what we want? To feel happy for a little bit?
That's the problem.
You see this as A Phase we'll move on from. As we await patiently for our love to be returned someday.
Foolish, really.
Foolish, truly.
I don't know how to talk about this.
Here's
Here's the thing.
It's true you know. I'd be happy just by their side forever. Platonic forever. Friends forever and ever, nothing to separate us anymore, just growing old together as platonic pals forever.
But here's another truth: i don't want that if that means i will never be sure of their feelings.
Do you love me? Do you hate me? Are you disgusted by me, and that's why you don't love me? Is it because I'm ugly? That should be a valid answer. "You're ugly and thus not my type" that's valid, that's expected, that's understandable.
But i want to know. I need to know.
I want to hug them so badly. But they don't like that. Makes me feel dirty. It makes me feel disgusting. I'm a touchy person.
Maybe i used to be a touchy person. I hugged a lot. I like getting hugged a lot, but i don't touch people a lot nowadays if i can help it.
But i love getting hugged by people i like.
I can't keep living knowing they'd be disgusted by my hugs. Because Maybe they just don't like being touched. Incredibly understandable.
But i don't know that, so. Maybe i am the problem. Maybe they dont like my hugs especifically.
I don't want them to hate me for how much i yearn to hold them.
But that's why im doing this, to kill for once my feelings for them and move on. Because this yearning is painful and makes me feel so alone.
And when my feelings are dead and gone, then maybe i can finally stand by their side and be their friend forever. Just their friend forever.
And friends get to live different lives apart from one another.
I hate that, for some reason.
Let's go home. Let's go home. I don't have a home anymore, so Let's build a home yeah? Yeah? Isn't that incredibly selfish and depraved?
To want someone that feels like home?
I keep crying even though i started writing this in a much better mood than this one. I was excited about the weekend. Now I'm just.
Well, right now, i am deeply melancholic. But I'll be okay. I just needed to get this one out of my system.
I will be okay.
It's okay to mourn your feelings, snaily. I'm glad you sit with them and write them for me, so i can understand them.
You're loved snaily.
Im sorry you dont feel that way because of your bpd. Please be kinder to yourself. Your friends love you. And one day you'll find someone that loves every part of you. Down to the ugliest, most vulnerable parts of you. And they'll be home. And find home in you too.
For now, let's be strong yes? Let me hold your hand through this.
We'll be okay. These kind of heartaches are normal. Let them pass through you. This is so very human of you, how wonderful.
You're wonderful for getting to experience love in many facets. Even this, is a part of feeling love and loving. We're glad you get to love so much. What a tender soul you are.
I love you, you know that? I'll always love you. This week was hard, right? We deserve a little break. To relax.
Tomorrow we'll get to enjoy a good day. Groceries sure are a chore, but we'll get to eat a little snack. See? You're feeling better already. I love you. Thanks for taking the time to write.
I love you. I love you, i love you. Right now and in the future when you're looking back through these entries, i want you to know that i love you and I'm glad you exist.
I love you snaily from the future, snaily from the present, and snaily from the past.
I love you.
It's late, let's put on a calming video and fall asleep while we listen to it. It'll be a nice way to end the day.
Good night my beloved, good night
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*sequel* to actual fucking quotes from the shiftblr coffeehouse discord server
once again, it's out of context because x1000 funnier
also x1000 longer than previous post
"ur satan is gnc af"
"Bestie I’m already having gender envy over a fucking demon please"
"O_O ODEPIJHFbavevisdpvfhzdcnjawedsidjksjdkoeirjfmkdsoeirujdksodifjndmksoidfjdksidfj ITS" NOT IN MY FRAFTS IS SPEDNT 1 hour PN THAT SHIT"
"AUGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH"
"ohoho sexy"
"I am very proud of myself"
"himbo x edgy fuck"
"YOU COULD SQUISH HES CHEECKS"
"he has teefs"
"SQUASH"
"good for biting 📷"
"he's a himbo basically"
"B͂̒̄iͫ̍̈tͧ̓ͯè̄̇"
"bifth"
"i havent watched blue exorcist in years but mr okumura my beloved </3"
"MY LIFE QUESTIONS HAVE BEEN ANSWERED"
"is it important information to mention that the person i put up for my turn is the son of satan" "I know like 1 thing about everyone who isnt ranboo lmfao"
"crimes"
"tumblr sexyman"
"idk why but my first thought was cowboy onceler"
"I vibe with him but he is very long and twisty"
"steampunk e-girl"
"steampunk tumblr sexyman"
"Canonically bi crimelord I agree!!"
"OOO FRIEND SHAPED"
"ARTIST SIGHTED"
"they look like someone i would want to be friends with but is way cooler than me so i'd never actually talk to them"
"babby..... would die for him"
"honestly i probably kin him"
"i'm sure he's lovely but he looks way too much like my ex i'm sorry-"
"i'd be down for another rotation! i have another twink to show y'all"
"Also :00 blonde friend"
"Let us all infodhmo"
"Hsjagdvbs shhh im on phone"
"Nix woukd you like to joon?
"skitters away"
"I have two braincells and they both drink dumb bitch juice"
"oof wait whats the order again i have 0 memory"
"i want to bond with him over cosplay-"
"Awkwardly watches in band kid"
"One day I'm gonna a broadway star"
"which isnt to say they were bad. they were just fortnite dancing during rehersals"
"I threw it so hard my glasses flew off and slid under the stage right divider"
"anyway heres my boi"
"emo"
"haha emo"
"virgil sanders kinnie"
"he looks like he listens to my chemical panic at the fallout boy"
"Bro I bet he'd kick my ass with his deck"
"bird man my beloved"
"fuck i had so much to say and then i forgot it all"
"Birds!!"
"guiguhuh"
"crabrave"
"She sounds like someone I would end up stealing her personality"
"yess name collector gang"
"alias glass aiden haven absinthe fish brick rice"
"But I have Cypress, Remure, Genesis, Lemres, and Comet"
"And she's named after a mars candy bar bc alien"
"Hey, if plato went by plato, you can be king thief"
"im not dissing my gramma like that shfojd"
"My dad has seven legal names" "bitches be like *looks at fictional character* *steals their name* it's us we're bithces"
"coraline lowkey traumatized me but i adore it regardless"
"mmmmmm magic man :]"
"°0° green man"
"criminal (affectionate)"
"he would shoplift a candy bar from walmart and then brag to all of his friends about the sick stealing he did"
"despite the fact he's canonically been capable of overpowering a minor deity"
"i would commit so many crimes for him"
"Very babey"
"Yes please tell green man he is very pog"
"he also keeps a lot of dumb secrets"
"but I will sorely miss the chaos and energy of this here chat until I wake again" (by request XD)
"i just say words and if they're funny then they're funny"
"* or extremly chaotic either works"
"at this point we are just taking turns rambling"
"oH--"
"bc my brain has a schedule"
"Hopefully they have gyoza there or I will lose my mind"
"hehe yes spooky man"
"my ghost glucose guardian"
"the head of the undead group that lives there, and we end up dating. (yes I date a ghost, no I will not be taking constructive criticism /lh)"
"ghosts r just inherently sexy"
"i mean im becoming a squid thing so"
"Raven quirk raven quirk!!"
"ł â m p"
"łæmp"
"mothman: ooh lamp you look very nice today! do you come here often? mothman: wait shit no"
"I'd date a ghost"
"mine is still accurate, i am still sobbing (/j)"
"p e e p e e"
""@nick wilde is a tumblr sexyman" is the best thing i have ever seen"
"im sorry im cackling like a dying hyena"
"you're all 12 year olds"
"PEENIE"
"He once caused global warming on accident so he could get a tan"
"god, what a himbo. i love him"
"that reminds me of my friends kin assigned me jesus"
"Man outside of battle be like: princely crying but then in battle hes like: "CATACLYSM! DISASTER! DEVASTATION!" Chill out man"
"Every time I talk about satan it never fails to shock people it's my favorite thing to do"
"im kin assigning him roman sanders" ""Oh yeah he caused global warming because he wanted to get girls" "he what""
"oh damn i forgot satan was straight"
"twink appreciation club"
"give us the twinks"
"my first thought was bottom-"
"so many people to try and get his dad to love him"
"daddy issued"
"OH MY GOD ITS WILBUR"
"Big boy but"
"anyways janus is swagggg"
"........................."
"gib twink"
"give twink then i will share"
"holds him gentle like hamburger"
"This dumb bitch opened a book that said "do not open" and got possessed by a little bastard"
"he is. fragile creachur"
"klug is beauty klug is grace i would let him step on my face"
"If I'm playing swap and I have to hear one more "Pwanet Powew" Im gonna lose it"
"Who is to blame? Pandora or the box?"
"Bakugo isnt my type but I respect the drip"
"i say like my type isnt long-haired pretty boys and girls that look so gnc that people have a history of confusing them for men"
"hes a gremlin and i can appreciate a pretty gremlin"
"that is to say i am attracted to VFlower vocaloid. This is a confession."
"note i am a lesbian"
"You may like Schezo wegey"
"why does he have one single expression"
"soul soul eater passes the vibe check"
"magic wand"
"I Want To Hold His Hand"
"i would commit a war crime for him any war crime idc which one"
"my favorite one is when he sounded rlly gay because he said "Muscular bodies keep me satisfied""
"p e a n u t"
"Klug is a homophobic homosexual its just facts"
"grug from the croods is peak male performance"
"jaw drops to floor, eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets, heart beats out of chest, awooga awooga sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, rattling any plates, bowls or silverware, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair Ahem, you look very lovely."
"tag yourself im the fireworks shooting from the top of the head"
"i like essays"
"central time gang"
"11:11 pog-" (wait... is that a suprise angel number?? yes it is lovelies just for you <3)
"Then again im also a dumbass bitch who wonders what the souls in soul eater taste like. SERIOUSLY THOUGH. THEY LOOK TASTY AS HELL!!!! LIKE GODDAMN BRO YOU'RE MAKING ME FUCKING HUNGRY. Like. that shit- it's Bone Apple motherfucking Teeth. hell yea my guy. Im hongy now.... shlorp I'm seriously considering this. Like. They seem kinda like a liquid? But a solid? Are they like jello? The fuck they taste like my guy???? I keep imagining they're like sour, like sour candy maybe? Or do they taste salty? Sweet? Maybe some combo of two? Do they even have a taste or is it about the texture? The sensation? God my mouth is watering what the hell. I am starving. I think I need to go get a cookie. I'm gonna go get a cookie. Brb. I'm better. I'm still craving souls though. Which is a weird-ass cringey thing to say but I'm being dead-ass rn. They just.... look tasty???? And I wanna eat one. Thus. I am shifting to Soul Eater for the express purpose of satisfying my fucking cravings. enjoy"
"points were made"
"jello? more like helloooo schloooAHFJDSDAIDWNALDHSJKDAIDANDM"
"WAIT I THINK I HAVE AN ANIME GIRL BITING VIDEO TOO"
"anime girl voice: mmm! mm... ahhhhmp!! mmm, mmm... aaahmp!"
"i think it sounds great i'm going to start eating like that"
"several people are typing"
"do these look edible to you"
"forbidden gummies"
"when I was on lsd I couldn't eat my fruit gummies because I thought they were alive because they had little faces on them"
"oh shit yeah don't do drugs"
"anyways general consensus is puyos are edible, ty for your input everyone"
"everypony is a word so powerful it can bring nations to its knees"
"pls the self control it's taking me not to say "hewwo everypony" in gen chat when someone new joins-"
"hewwo evewrypony uwu deaw cewestia i hopwe it doewsnt wain owo"
"ive cooked up a sowution wiwth the knowwege ive acwued. they say a kitcwen time saves niwne, but im just savwing two. Ive gathewwed the inwedients to make a time sowbet. Thewe's hawdly woom fow seconds when the seconds mewt away."
"I had a ten year old sister... you know what happened to her??? very sad, very tragic... she turned eleven....."
"NIIICE"
"Guts dont say the secks word :( /j"
"watch your fucking language in front of the president"
"im so sorry lumi"
"i think you're like ehhhh 8/10 funny"
"now me???? 10/10. Hilarious"
"sometimes i have to take a step back and remember that this is the same guts i follow on tumblr /lh"
""ok every here's some good shifting advice!!! uwu have a good day" "yeah i did lsd and ate fruit gummies""
"i have one setting and it's whatever this is"
"my bitch ass cat just pushed the door open with his fuzzy face and now my sleeping dad is being lulled into dreams by Cosmo Sheldrake's 'Pliocine'."
"me on discord: nick wilde"
"me on tumblr: shifting water! haha funne! me on here: my hermit crabs are cannibals also i want to eat souls."
"im sorry yOUR VIBESA RE JUST SO DIFFERNT"
"u give off older cousin ive never spoken to but always admire at the family gatherings vibes"
"what the fuck"
"BC I HAVE LIBERTU"
"If you adopt me then yes"
"am I qualified for dad jokes???"
"we're all a lot smarter on tumblr"
"I'm like "awww... sweet... sweet little shiftlings... posting such sweet shiftling content... so pure, so wholesome... does not even know abcs....""
"can't think before you speak if you never think B)"
"I'm not responsible enough to be a mom"
"cat pet"
"show us pictures of the cat or i will do Crime"
"maybe thats me being a coward tho"
"MOTH!!!! MOTH MY BELOVED"
if y'all want I can make this a series bc shiftblr keeps giving me more content
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rynhaswritersblock · 4 years
Text
tiktok famous (hc) - part three | p.p.
summary: you and peter doing various tiktok trends. y'all know the deal
warnings: ultra chaotic writing (i have nine other drafts forgive me i am a tad bit stressed), cussing as always, and HOPEFULLY GOOD WRITING??? oh and yes as always peter being Babey
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- HI!!!!!! BACK AT IT AGAIN WITH THE TIKTOK HCS!!!!!!!
- i got a few requests/ideas from y'all for more tiktoks so here we are
- tbh since so many new trends are constantly coming out i might just make this a whole ass SERIES but we'll see
- who knows if i can even handle that
- btw:: if i forgot one or there's one you really want me to write you can comment it and i'll try to add it to this!!! if it's too long since posted though i'll add it to my drafts <3
- OKAY TIME FOR CHAOTIC ENERGY
- as mentioned in past versions of this series
- tiktok dances are ADDICTIVE!!!
- and you literally broke a goddamn sweat learning supalonely but we're NOT GONNA TALK ABOUT IT
- and you and peter are hanging out one day
- and as all of these ideas happen
- you get ~inspired~ by the for you page
- you set up the camera, flipping it so that it's facing peter and not you
- the lil shit hasn't even noticed that you got up yet what a poop
- but as soon as the music starts playing he raises his head
- you're doing the supalonely dance like a fucking BOSS
- all while pretending to be looking at yourself in the camera
- you don't let yourself stare at the screen so you don't get distracted
- but
- of course
- peter is nodding his beat to the beat, clapping for you, and when you to the body roll thing on "drinking" he lets out a whoop that makes you wheeze
- when you finish you laugh, letting out a sigh and grabbing your phone
"not gonna lie, you ate that."
"i know."
- you sit back down next to him, heart rate in da Clouds, and start watching the video
- petey boi is just sitting there like a puppy, crooked smile on his face as he watches you
- in a few parts he's even doing the dance with you
- and he looks so in awe
- you can't stop watching it and smiling at the screen
- but then the fucker sits down next to you and is like "you should post that it was really good"
- so you show him it
- his face gets all red bc he's babey
"you were videoing me??"
- OKAY NEXT ONE
- so i think we all know the rosa videos
- for the b99 fans: rosa rosa rosaaaaaaaaaaaa
- she's a QUEEN
- and you constantly quote those things like
- every time there's a silent moment you're just like "you're fucking lying let me see" and the whole team (avengers squad) is like ayo stfu
- one day y'all are just hanging in the commons of headquarters
- we're getting the band back together!
- and you start videoing cause you're bored
- you point the camera at peter
"aye dude come here?"
- everybody groans and peter gives the camera a sassy look, tilting his head
"you're gay? i fuckin-"
"language," steve mutters
"-knew it dude!" you smile, zooming in on the camera
- peter gets a confused look on his face
"wait no i'm bi"
- tony effin SHOOTS UP
- sitting like there's a goddamn board in his back
- and he slowly turns his head in your direction
- eyebrow raised
- you bust out laughing and so does everyone else, including peter
- tony's looking around like "hey what the FUCK is HAPPENING"
"stark, you didn't know?"
"NO??"
- lol we stan bi peter parker
- aight BACK TO THE SHITS AND GIGGLES
- so you and peter are obsessed with that quirky tiktok bartender girl who makes all the drinks
- i forgot her name but she's like
we're gonna do 2 ounces so that's 1, 2, 3, 4! we're gonna give it a nice strain! andddd shake shake shake shake! fun, right?
- yk what i mean
- hi it's editing ryn it's her tiktok is like paradise bartender
- and so one day
- jk one NIGHT
- it's like 2 am
- and you and peter are like
- let's make lemonade. but like. Fake Alcohol Version Because We're Underage
- and so y'all run to the kitchen
- you almost crush and die from slipping on your socks
- the two of you and laughing and giggling as you run and around and get all your materials
"where is the fucking STRAINER"
"bitch idk help me find the lemon flavor packets"
- it takes FAR too long but y'all are finally ready
- you start recording and the two of you are already laughing
"hey guys so today-"
"TODAY" he pushes you to the side "we're gonna be making LEMONADE!"
- the two of you keep laughing as you shove each other trying to be the one in charge
- so basically
- peter gets water all over the counter
- some of the ice flies out when you shake it
- the strainer DOESN'T WORK AND ALL THE STUFF GETS EVERYWHERE
- and the small amount that lands in the cup tastes like whispering lemon
- like hella watered down there's like nothing there
- the lemon is SHY
- and then in the last 10 seconds of the video bucky walks in
- and he's like wtf... wait y'all are making lemonade??
- and the three of you end up making lemonade for real and drinking it while watching infomercials
- at two in the morning
- fun, right?
- those videos are so satisfying NEXT TIKTOK
- thank u ritxal for the idea !!
- so our boi PETE HERE
- is hella addicted to those cool pov videos
- and he gets a really good idea even though it would make him a SIMP
- he ends up deciding FUCK IT I'M MAKING ONE
- MY TIKTOK ACCOUNT IS PRIVATE ANYWAYS
- so he sets up his phone and jumps around to get ~~in the zone~~
- feeling stupid as hell
- he films one of those ones where it's the "from the other side" *noise!!!!!!!!* one's yk where the ppl are like "are you sure you want to __?" and it has the yes and no buttons
- you know
- i hope
- and he puts the text on it and shrugs, posting it
- meanwhile you're home and you get the notification that peter posted a tiktok
- obviously you click on it because
- uh
- because
- and you watch it and gasp because the caption says pov and ur like who tf is this man peter never posts povs
- you watch as peter is looking nervously at the camera and text pops up saying "are you sure you want to give up?"
- he presses yes and you're like oh god oh peter wait is this a sign shit FUCK
- a new text bubble pops up saying "do you want to see her?" and you fucking yeLP
- you're like holy FUCK WAIT WHO IS HER???? WIFE???? DAUGHTER?????? HUH!!!!!!!
- and then he presses yes
- and the screen goes black
- you see urself in the screen
- and you basically DIE
- a wheeze so hard that it hurts flies out of your mouth and you IMMEDIATELY PRESS DUET
- you start filming with your phone facing the ceiling and as the beat drops (or whatever when it's like ahhhh!) you pop onto the screen, smiling
- and you're like RANDOM CONFIDENCE BOOST WHATEVER POST
- and then BACK TO PETER'S PLACE
- HE GETS THE NOTIFICATION AND IS LIKE WHAT
- AND WHEN HE SEES YOU POP ONTO THE SCREEN HE'S LIKE HOLY FUCK
- AND SO HE FACETIMES YOU
- YOU ANSWER OBVI
"y/n what the hell"
"did you like it?"
"maybe"
- okay i wanna do another pov one so here we go
- i'm sure everyone here is acquainted with the "they call me tiago.. i don't know who's margo" ones
-  these are lowkey difficult to write out so i'm just gonna lay it out for you as best i can
- really trying here
- so peter posts the boy's voice part ("no no no... they call me tiago. i don't know who's margo? i just hit this lotto" etc etc etc)
- and when it's like idk who's margo he just holds a stare with the camera in like an InTiMiDaTiNg way
- even though he's babey and a literal puppy it actually like.. works
- and when you see it you're like yes so you post the other part (that people never do lol "her name is margo" etc all the female voicing)
- and you hold the stare too and EVEN LIKE RAISE YOUR EYEBROW SUGGESTIVELY AND GIVE HIM THE LOOK IYKYK
- so BASICALLY
- i'm really trying here i can visualize these tiktoks perfectly but GOD if i don't struggle a bit while writing them
PETER'S CAPTION: pov: we're rivals on separate missions but you keep screwing with my plans so i try to intimidate you
Y/N'S CAPTION: pov: we're rivals on separate missions but i found you cute so i decide to mess around with your mission
- OH BY THE WAY THE TWO OF YOU LIVE AT AVENGERS HEADQUARTERS AND HE POSTED "YESTERDAY" SO YOU DECIDE TO POST "TODAY" AND WALK OUT OF YOUR ROOM TO WHERE HE WAS IN THE COMMONS RIGHT AFTER YOU POSTED
- can y'all tell how messy my brain is holy shit
- pls forgive me i keep getting random ideas but IT ADDS TO THE CHAOS SO IT'S FINE RIGHT
- OKAY
- BACK AGAIN
- so you post and walk out and as you turn the corner to the commons you can hear the sound play and have to stop a moment to silently scream
- thankfully no one else was in there except for peter (whose back was to you) otherwise you woulda looked INSANE
- you walk up behind him and smile as he laughs slightly and watches it another time, pulling his phone closer to his face to read the caption
"holy shit," he mutters
- he closes his eyes and smiles and tilts his head back, resting it on the back of the couch (🥺)
"you like it?"
- lol
- this kid SHOOTS UP
- HELLO
"oh my god, y/n, what are you doing"
"coming to hang out with you??"
- he sighs as you come and plop down next to him
"what the hell is this"
- he shows you his phone
"a tiktok"
- he smiles and shakes his head (doing that thing where you like look down while doing it and it's so CUTE)
"yeah. i got that."
- NEXT TIKTOK
- alright guess the scenario
- just fucking guess
- i'll wait
- ...
- you'd best BELIEVE that y'all are chilling at headquarters in the commons rn
- where da HELL ELSE
- and
- like LITERALLY EVERY OTHER TIKTOK THAT I WRITE OUT IN THESE
- YOU AND PETE BE CHILLIN
- AND YOU SET UP YOUR PHONE
- god i'm starting to question if i'm capable of writing literally anything else damn
- peter's in the background of course
- and it's this godforsaken audio i'm sure most of you have heard
- you know the one where it's like fast music and then it goes "mm, yeah" and it's usually accompanied with a video of some really pretty girl fake moaning and like rolling her eyes while pushing up her hair??
- well
- all of that
- everything i just said
- is exactly what you do
- and the thing is
- as soon as peter hears the audio he recognizes it
- are we gonna talk about the fact that peter probably spent at least a whole night watching those videos because 1) girls are really pretty and 2) every time he heard it he could vividly imagine you doing it??????? no??? okay
- so he like
- sits up
- does the thing where he rests his forearms on his knees and leans forward, glaring at you through the camera
- and in the background
- if you're paying attention
- peter FLIPS HIS SHIT WHEN YOU DO THE "MM YEAH" PART
- he tHROWS HIS ARMS IN THE AIR LIKE WHAT THE HELL DUDE I THOUGHT I GAVE YOU SIGNS THAT EVEN THOUGH WE'RE NOT A COUPLE AND WE BOTH KNOW YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE OUT OF SPITE,, DOING SOMETHING LIKE THAT ON VIDEO IS ABSOLUTELY OFF LIMITS!!!!!!!
"Y/N!"
- it's still recording and you turn around and laugh, throwing your head back as he jumps up and grabs you by the waist, pulling you in
- the two of you start play fighting just like elio and oliver from cmbyn (but a bit less steamy yk?? more innocent yet still w a bit of tension yeye)
- needless to say you keep that video in a very special place of your heart
- and so does peter like once the two of you stop wrestling you realize that the video had just been looping behind the sound of your laughter and fighting y'all watch it and it loops a few times while the two of you are silent and he finally goes "can you uh. can you send that. to me. ???????"
- next oneeeeeeeeeeeeee
- thank u lilmissquackson for the idea <3
- so in this one you and petey are dating
- and y'all decide to do the put a finger down challenge lol
- but instead of using an audio y'all decide to switch off coming up with ones on the spot
"put a finger down if your boyfriend tackles you every time you're standing near a couch or bed"
"put a finger down if your girlfriend still calls you dude"
"put a finger down if your boyfriend once webbed you to the wall because you wouldn't stand still when he was trying to kiss you"
"put a finger down if your girlfriend used her telepathic powers to keep you out of her room when she was mad at you"
"put a finger down if your boyfriend took TWO YEARS TO ASK YOU OUT"
"put a finger down if your girlfriend started laughing after you told her you liked her"
"put a finger down if you only started laughing because it TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH"
"put a finger down if your girlfriend showed no signs of liking you before you decided to ask her out"
"put a finger down if your boyfriend is the most oblivious boy in the world"
"put a finger down if you're in love with your girlfriend but haven't said 'i love you' yet because you're scared she won't say it back"
- your jaw drops and turn to him
- needless to say you were very glad to have caught your first "i love you"s on camera
- SIDE NOTE you did not post cause after you and peter watched the video back y'all were both like "we don't wanna be THOSE bitches"
- next one woop
- thank u MrsLillianAmbrose for the idea !!
- okay buds
- so here's the thing
- i hate to under-perform
- but i feel like the best way to get the full effect of this tiktok is to watch it and then just roll with me here
- SOOOOO (if u can)
1) open tiktok 2) search @_tharealjohnnyyy_ 3) go to his account (or it might just show up when you search) 4) and scroll to the "ways to cuddle" video 5) it was posted in february 2020 if that helps give u a time reference lol
- OKAY
- I HOPE Y'ALL GOT TO WATCH IT
- I TRIED JUST PUTTING IT IN HERE BUT WATTPAD WOULDN'T LET ME AND I COULDN'T FIND IT ON YOUTUBE (let me know if one of u does!!!)
- if u weren't able to watch it (i'm so sorry) i'm gonna do the best i can to at least make this entertaining
- WOOP
- so if you could see the tiktok that's really all this is
- you and peter doing literally the same thing
- y'all are giggling in between positions and peter struggles to set the camera up every time it falls
- he ends up just webbing it to the ceiling
- and in the end the two of you fall asleep in the reverse OG position with your fingers playing with his hair 🥰🥰
- i hope that was good enough im sorry AH
- next!!
- thank u Mendesmycam for the idea <33
- okay so y'all know that sound
SOMETHING ABOUT YA GORLL
REALLY MAKES MY HEADDDD WANNA TWIRLLLLLLLLLL
- or whatever the lyrics are
- those tiktoks are SO FUNNY
- AND YOU DECIDE TO COPY THEM
- so you grab a chair and sit peter down in the middle of the room and set the camera up
- luckily for you he has a bag of cheez-its in hand that you plan to utilize later
- babey has a confused look on his face as he watches you press play and he shoves some more cheez-its in his mouth
- the music starts playing and you just about bust out laughing as you walk all around him, running your hand across his chest
- his heart is racing he's like AYO WHAT THE FUCK IS GOIN ON
"y/n what the hell are you-"
SOMETHING ABOUT YOU GIRL
- you practically snap into a weird position
- ur freaking arms are out in front of you and you're on your toes and knees are bent and you're hunched over and it's like
- a very interesting pose
- peter BUSTS OUT LAUGHING
- his eyes are all crinkly as he bends over in the chair
- you just about break but you manage to keep a straight face as you start dancing around weirdly
- needless to say you look like a goddamn CONTORTIONIST
- peter can't stop wheezing
- you make one of your hands in the shape of like the italian man hand this iykyk and fucking SWAN DIVE YOUR FINGERS INTO HIS CHEEZ-IT BAG
- meanwhile peter's STILL DYING
- and you take the cheezits and lean back, sprinkling them all over you (like the popcorn one if you saw that tiktok lmao)
- and the video finally ends and you get to laugh
"y/n what the hell was that"
"i don't know i thought you might enjoy a little entertainment"
- and of course
- that's exactly when no other than SAM WILSON fucking strolls in
- hey how y'all doin'- AHHH (get yo fucking dog bitch! ~it don't bite~ YES IT DO GET YO-)
- sorry got distracted
- and he hears you and his head SPINS ON OVER TO Y'ALL'S DIRECTION
"a little what now?"
- AIGHT GUYS
- LAST ONE
- Y'ALL ARE AT HEADQUARTERS CAUSE WHERE DA HECK ELSE
- this time you're in peter's room though
- and i'd like to imagine this one with the cool led lights because 1) tiktok and 2) i feel like peter would have those in his room
- y'all are just chilling watching hot rod (GREAT MOVIE BTW)
- and
- peter sets up the camera
- not to mention his heart is RACING RN CAUSE HE'S A NERVOUS BEAN
- and he hits record and leans back, letting out a sigh
- you don't even notice his phone literally right there cause you're just enjoying the movie
- a few seconds into the video and petey is like Visibly Freaking Out
- but a funny part plays and you laugh, looking over at him to see if he found it funny too
- he notices you're turning your head so he's like YES I LOOK AT TV HOT ROD MOVIE I AM LOOKING THAT WAY AND WASN'T STARING AT YOU OR THE CAMERA YES THIS IS A FUNNY PART I AM LAUGHING
- and then you look away
- and then he looks at you
- and ever so lightly grabs you by the chin
- and pulls you to him and plants his lips on yours
- finally, dumbass
+ + +
huzzah
i hope u guys enjoyed !!!!!!! ヽ(✿゚▽゚)ノ
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faunusrights · 5 years
Text
OFFAL HUNT REMASTER LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 9
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oh goody!
well this is it. the Date Chapter. the chapter, in which, the Date happens. lowkey im so fucking hype for this stupid goddamn chapter AAAAAAAAAAAA this is when the sexy got kicked up about seven notches and i know its gonna be a fucking twenty from here on out so LETS GO LESBIANS LETS GO
“Is this your date, Ms. Fall?” he asked.
Cinder didn’t look away from Glynda. “Mhm.”
STRAIGHT OUT OF THE GODDAMN GATE WE DIDN’T EVEN HAVE A SECOND TO EVEN GATHER OURSELVES JUST STRAIGHT UP HUH!!!!!!!!! ‘is this your date’ im legally dead
What the fuck.
already im fucking THRIVING im so glad this chapter’s mood got encapsulated within the first ten seconds and im definitely gonna have to re-read this chapter for the full unannotated experience OOOOOOOOOH MY GOD IM SO READY
Glynda’s thoughts ricocheted inside her head like coins left in a dryer. A part of her couldn’t understand what was happening and disengaged. The rest of her, grasping for purchase in all this, reasoned that going with Cinder was better than staying here confused, alone, and utterly displaced.
glynda ‘i aint ever had a gf before’ goodwitch at her PEAK right here. like GOD shes gone from ‘cinder’s trying to murder me’ to ‘cinder just plopped me right into a date’ like CINDER. CINDER YR CHANGING GEARS SO FAST. YOU DIDNT EVEN SEND FLOWERS OR ANYTHING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
is it because shes a u-haul lesbian or
Higher, Glynda realized the dress itself was backless, revealing the black tattoo she’d seen so often before, perfectly centered between sharp shoulder blades.
this gay energy is BONKERS, quite frankly??????? where did cinder get her dress from? why does she have it? did she buy it just for this fuckery? or will she pull the ‘i just had a this lil number laying around’ line????????? does she wanna seduce glynda to death?????? was this PLANNED OR DID SHE JUST DECIDE SHE WANTED A DATE AND WTH LIFE REALLY IS SHORT ON REMNANT THESE DAYS?????????? cinder fall please explain your workings to the class
maybe Glynda wasn’t the only one who’d become adept at reading her opponent.
👏 when 👏 will 👏 they 👏 kiss 👏 already 👏👏👏👏
me: this is a slowburn also me: if u assholes dont give me this in the next ten seconds-
“Unarmed? As if you could be so helpless.”
cinder’s style of flirting is just. commentating on a person’s deadliness. that’s IT it’s the only TRICK SHE HAS and its working, is the thing,
im reading the description of the table and remembering the shitpost and oh my god i have to draw this???? hell IS real!!!!!! COULDNT YALL JUST TOSS EM IN A PLAIN BOX,
Cinder eyed her from her bastion of dark cushions,
cinder, ass-deep in cushions: this is peak cuddle territory come and join me
Cinder, for her part, seemed delighted Glynda had noticed. Touching the pendant more gently than Glynda might have ever thought her capable of, Cinder said,  “Yours? You didn’t seem to mind parting with it.”
im still deeply enjoying this powermove the novelty NEVER wears off (and at risk of light spoilers i do enjoy its place in this story 👀)
Cinder let the necklace drop, settling against the swell of her bust once more,
/lightly coughs 👀👀👀
im losing my MIND at how gay this bit is i physically cannot HANDLE IT and if they even describe the meal once im gonna pop off cause i am. SO HUNGRY RN. AAAAAAAAAAAA
Cinder indicated a dish of lamb and vegetables, served on a bed of rice and drizzled in some sort of sauce.
SRY THIS ISNT GAY BUT OH MY GOD IM SO HUNGRY I WANNA E A T I T THAT SOUNDS SO GOOD UGHGHGHGHGHGH WHY DID THIS CHAPTER HAVE TO BE TODAY OF ALL THE DAYS,
Glynda cleared her throat, working out: “The Grimm.”
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like. GOD WE KNOW GLYNDA IS JUST SO FUNCTIONALLY BAD AT CONVERSATION BUT OF ALL THE THINGS glynda please just. just. stop thinking abt her sexy tattoos for a fifth of a second,
“You can control them.” A sedate blink. For all the world, Glynda might have just commented on the weather.
which is a faux pas for a date!!!!!!!!!!! at least tell her the DRESS IS SEXY WE ALL KNO WHATS WHAT YR THINKIN ABT
Glancing down as though it were being pointed out to her for the first time, Cinder shrugged and adjusted the end of the glove a little higher on her bicep. “And?” 
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a quick aside im enjoying how like... visually expressive cinder is in this remaster! i can see her facial expressions and her motions really clearly in my mind’s eye which is a fun little boon if only because i have to redraw this nonsense hjsgdfjhfksgd but cinder’s got a Good Face this time around! A QUALITY FACE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
You should know by now, there’s something about you that’s simply irresistible to Grimm.”
HERE COMES THE PLOT (and a single surviving line so far... this one sentence has survived all the world could throw at it... we stan)
Cinder straightened, and Glynda saw that this was what she’d been waiting for.
“It isn’t every day the great Glynda Goodwitch kneels before her adversary, is it?”
HELLO??????????????????????????? WHATS THIS WORDING????????? honestly tho for a second i thought she meant like. quite literally and i thought id missed some PROPER SHIT RIGHT THERE BUT YEAH WTH!!!!!!! C I N D E R
“You cheated. You can’t beat me on your own.”
yes glynda we gathered that yr a top
“Really, Glynda? Poison?” she sneered, something like offense simmering in her expression. “After all this?”
looks at the camera
anyway,
god im literally losing grasp of words to say because theres such a charged mood in this scene............. theyre brushing fingers............ trading jabs.......... im slurpin it up babey!!!!!!!! this rly is the BEST remaster of this whole scene it DESERVES this wordcount!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
“Beat you,” Cinder corrected. “And call it a point of pride.”
yes cinder we gathered yr a brat,
this dynamic is why this fic is so fuckign good when will winter have a swift return to add even more fuckery to this wild ride
Then, with a heavy-lidded look, Cinder found Glynda’s hand between them, the touch so sudden and daring that Glynda flinched. The fabric of those gloves was smooth against Glynda’s flesh, and for all that cruelty had marked every other instance of contact between them, Cinder was surprisingly gentle.
whomp there go my nuts
WHAT IS THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WHO MADE THE EXECUTIVE CHOICE TO ADD THIS LINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO???????????? im losing my BRAINCELLS
What she wasn’t ready for was for Cinder to guide her hand to her own throat and hold it there.
THERE IS IT THERE’S THE KINK IT’S BEEN SPOTTED
oh my GOD what even IS THIS WHO ADDED THIS SECTION WHO ALLOWED THIS TO COME TO P A S S WHAT THE FUCK EVEN IS RN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HELLO????????? HEWWO??????????
Now… Now Cinder interested her.
tbh how can i liveblog this? what commentary can i POSSIBLY add that we arent already all THINKING. we just launched into a level of hell so deep that lucifers gonna have to pull some goddamn tricks to follow us down here!!!!!!!!!! WHAT IS THIS SCENE! THIS MOMENT! IM SCREAMING
Glynda mirrored the expression back at him, and finally, he coughed, not making strong eye contact with either of them. He set their plate before them and hurried out without so much as a check-in.
i just KNEW that was gonna happen JHGDSFGJHKSDF he was gonna walk in on SMTHNG but i didnt think itd be CINDER’S CHOKING KINK,
okay i took a break and ate my weight in roast chicken and we’re back babey
Almost nervously, her fingers carded through her own dark hair, and there, among the locks, Glynda spotted a glimpse of something white, structured and ridged.
AND I AM INSTANTLY KNOCKED BACK UPON MY ASS 👈W👈H😨A👈T👈
It was easier to ignore the rest of it—whatever it was.
glynda you are a fool and a moron im withering into DUST
On no level had she expected those to be Glynda’s words.
then what... did she expect... well probably -- and rightly so -- ‘bitch WHAT ARE THOSE’ TBH
wait sorry i have to jump back because i forgot customary fingerguns on the most brazen bit of Shit yet:
Cinder was occupying herself with something else: the head of a dragon, perched over the door and staring down at the two of them with red, glossy eyes.
👈👈👈😎👈👈👈
okay BACK TO THE FIC
Fangs snapped together around the word.
aka back to me horni
/chanting TEETH! TEETH! TE
okay but the reason i doubled back to catch that fingergun is because we’re getting ass-deep into plot now!!!!!!!!!!! WITCHES AND DRAGONS BABEY......... HERE’S WHAT OFFAL HUNT IS ALL ABT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i cant rly drop more fingerguns than that because any astute reader will start realising the dots im shouting abt and honestly half the fun of this fic is the ride so >:3c
“Funny. I was sure he would have told you.”
that blow was so low i think cinder hit the concrete with that one
oh god theyre gonna get to the bit and i-
“Is that what all of this has been about? You called me here to remind me that I'm autistic?”
/SCREAMS
The words were delivered firmly, calmly, but Cinder’s response was the opposite, sudden upheaval seizing her. Her expression opened in something akin to panic. “Wh—no? What? No! That's not what I—”
/SCREAMS
oh my GOD CINDER YOU HAVE FUCKED UP LEGENDARILY!!!!!!!!!! OH MY GOD SHE WAS FELL ASS-FIRST ONTO A LANDMINE OH MY GOD
offal hunt v1 cinder: im totally in control and im playing glynda every step of the way
offal hunt v2 cinder: OH JESUS OH FUCK OH NO THAT’S NOT WHAT I MEANT-
Cinder seemed genuinely stressed now, speaking quicker as though trying to bury the last sixty seconds.
i knew this remaster would have sections that would blow me away but this bit really took the fcuking cake DGHSJFSJHFDG holy SHIT this is AMAZING
It was difficult to tell in the low light, but if Glynda wasn't mistaken, there was a bright flush of embarrassment coloring Cinder’s cheeks.
this is SUCH prime content hey remember in one of the early liveblogs that cinder would descend into full dork? WELL THE DESCENT CAME EARLY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! /pops bottles
“Cinder.” There was a very real line of threat in Glynda’s tone. “Don’t.”
oh this whole scene just keeps getting better i am LOVING this dynamic now!!!!!!! before it was all pretty one-sided so having the conversation rock back and forth is 👌👌👌
That Witch soul of yours—it was designed to void out everything but the prey before you. To be numb to all human emotion. To focus on the hunt and nothing else.
finally the fruit of 50% of my fingerguns COMES TO LIGHT!!!!!!!!!!! PLOT PLOT PLOT
“This is bullshit.” Jabbing an accusing finger at Cinder, Glynda said, “You’re a liar. You’re a criminal!”
i LOVE glyndas pottymouth in this its such a good like... change from her being strict and formal and teachery and now shes full on gremlin huntress hell YES BABY!!!!!!!!!! GO OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
“There’s all kinds of things I bet he never told you.” Cinder continued. “Did you know he was close to your predecessor? The Witch who came before you—they were inseparable.”
SRY IM LIKE STRUGGLIN TO COMMENTATE because so much of this like. speaking as an Old-Ass Reader this is like. a LOT! A LOT HAS CHANGED and yet,,,, stayed the same,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, yall kids WILL NEVER KNOW WHAT IT WAS LIKE TO HAVE TO WAIT UNTIL CHAPTER LIKE................ 15 FOR THIS SHIT (but like. chapter 15 was different because this chapter used to be like chapter 7? so now everythings moved along so chapter 15 doesnt sound that impressive but trust me it was a different fic back then)
When they fell away, burnt and ruined, she could see Cinder’s bare arms for the first time. The red lines drawn across her skin sloped down the entire length of her arms, circling her elbows, carved into her wrists. They ended right at her hands, ensuring any long-sleeved garment would hide them. Every covered inch of her was filled like a canvas, like abstract art.
lets pause the fight scene for glynda to be gay!!!!! god im. okay look i said this earlier but im so glad we have more cinder like this tbh. the first version was rly lacking w/ cinder content until late-game when the plot sorta. got itself going? but now we’re eye-deep in this content i LOVE cinder i love this WEIRDO who is a HUGE LOSER and IDIOT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM LOVE HER SO MUCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And Glynda could not dispel the fear that she had been telling the truth.
and after committing Some Amount In Damages, we’re at the end of the chapter!
okay so i really enjoyed this version SO MUCH MORE. everything abt it was polished and worked together so much better and it really needed the space to breathe in its own chapter. its been horny, gay, intense, hilarious, and way more in one chapter and its SO good this really is PEAK offal hunt!!!!!!!!!!!! good job diesel and kc but im still going to murder you both,
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acidwaste · 6 years
Text
hey so it seems i’ve forgot to do a l o t of tag memes, and i’m lucky i drafted a big bunch of them! lots of questions overlapped so i did my best to answer in different ways, sorry for the lateness! also @ the people that tagged me here, i wouldn't hesitate to kill for you
@natcaptor / @gayspaced
name: leon or lionel!
nicknames: literally the only nickname I’ve been referred to is “big gay” and like. word!
gender: im pretty sure im a guy, i have been kinda 🤔🤔🤔 abt my gender identity since around november-ish though
star sign: sagittarius!
height: 6’1! i’m told that I’m tall but my uncle is 6’7 so...
time: 3:36pm rn! ive been watching video essays and binging music all afternoon
birthday: december 9th!
favourite bands: animal collective, beach house, camp cope, car seat headrest, death grips, fleet foxes, florence + the machine, gang of youths, glass animals, gorillaz, hop along, iceage, idles, kero kero bonito, mgmt, miike snow, modest mouse, run the jewels, superorganism, the avalanches, the cat empire, the go! team, the mountain goats, the wombats, xiu xiu
favourite solo artists: alex lahey, anderson .paak, ariana grande, billie eilish, bjork, cashmere cat, charli xcx, courtney barnett, cupcakke, d.r.a.m, eric taxxon, frank ocean, gfoty, hatchie, janelle monae, jeff rosenstock, joanna newsom, jorja smith, jpegmafia, kacey musgraves, kali uchis, kendrick lamar, khalid, kimbra, lorde, mac demarco, madeon, mick jenkins, mitski, oneohtrix point never, perfume genius, ravyn lenae, rina sawayama, serpentwithfeet, sophie, st. vincent, sza, vince staples
song stuck in my head: caramelo duro | miguel // kali uchis! its a bop, miguel is one of the few singers that can convincingly make sex jams
last movie i watched: deadpool 2! it was even better than the first, which is a feat in itself ngl
when did i create my blog: december 2016??? i only started using it properly in february last year tho
last thing i googled: “im in my mums car broom broom.” dont @ me
do i have any other blogs: yeah, plenty actually!! i have blogs for aesthetic (@moltenstar), general inspo (@wverns), flight rising (@szarising, kinda inactive?), and overwatch (@blackhardts) tbh the vast majority of my ‘sideblogs’ are just saved urls H
do i get asks: when i say stupid shit like “rung has the ass of a dilf but the dick of a cockroach”
why i chose my url: that one panel where kobd have a vacation at the acid wastes because fuck its finally canon babey!
following: 1,767, which is kinda horrifying!!
followers: 890?? somehow??? thats almost One Whole Thousand and i don't even make content
average hours of sleep: around 6 or 7!! n e v e r more though
lucky number: 43 and 64!!
instruments: i'm too poor to afford music lessons or instruments jsbddsjknfs
what am i wearing: a grey shirt and nothing on my bottom half so my [redacted] is hanging tf out, i should put on some damn clothes
dream job:  oooo uhhh, i’m studying to get an education degree rn because i’d love to teach children (around grade 3-4s preferably because i'm too jittery to handle anyone younger and older kids probs won't listen to me as much as i lack plenty of assertiveness), but!! i’d honestly love to be a musician, one of those underground ones that get lots of critical acclaim
dream trip: one day i wanna gather up some friends and just go on a road trip! idm where we go to, as long as we just have fun and just! adventure!
favourite foods: rare steak, mashed potatoes, eggs, and energy shakes made with like. fruit / cheese / yoghurt / oats / chia seeds ! protein is a large part of my diet
nationality: new zealand, but living in australia
favourite song right now: best part | daniel caesar // h.e.r - gosh i need to re-listen to daniel’s album again, i don’t remember this beautiful song being there and that’s a crime
@damndesi / @novarebel / @luciform-philogynist
APPEARANCE - I am 5'7 or taller - I wear glasses - I have at least one tattoo (but I am getting a tā moko in December, I believe) - I have at least one piercing (planning to get a nose ring, like a bull!) - I have blonde hair - I have brown eyes - I have short hair - My abs are at least somewhat defined (b a r e l y) - I have or had braces
PERSONALITY - I love meeting new people - People tell me I am funny - Helping others with their problems is a big priority of mine - I enjoy physical challenges - I enjoy mental challenges - I am playfully rude to people I know - I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it - There is something I would change about my personality
ABILITY - I can sing well - I can play an instrument - I can do over 30 pushups without stopping (barely) - I am a fast runner - I can draw well - I have a good memory - I am good at doing math in my head - I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute - I have beaten at least 2 people arm wrestling - I can make at least 3 recipes from scratch - I know how to throw a proper punch
HOBBIES - I enjoy sports - I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else - I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else - I have learned a new song in the past week - I exercise at least once a week - I have gone for runs at least once a week in warmer months - I have drawn something in the past month - I enjoy writing - Fandoms are my #1 priority - I do some form of Martial arts
EXPERIENCES - I have had my first kiss - I have had alcohol (tastes like shit) - I have scored a winning point in a sport - I have watched an entire TV series in one sitting - I have been at an overnight event - I have been in a taxi - I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year - I have beaten a video game in one day - I have visited another country - I have been to one of my favorite bands concerts
MY LIFE - I have one person that I consider to be my Best Friend - I live relatively close to my school/work - My parents are still together - I have at least one sibling - I live in the United States - There is snow where I live right now - I have hung out with a friend in the past month - I have a smart phone - I own at least 15 CDs - I share my room with someone
RELATIONSHIPS - I am in a Relationship - I have a crush on a celebrity - I have a crush on someone I know - I’ve been in at least 3 relationships - I have never been in a Relationship - I have admitted my feelings to a crush - I get crushes easily - I have had a crush for over a year - I have been in a relationship for over a year - I have had feelings for a friend
RANDOM - I have break-danced - I know a person named Jamie - I have had a teacher that has a name that is hard to pronounce - I have dyed my hair - I’m listening to a song on repeat right now - I have punched someone in the past week - I know someone who has gone to jail - I have broken a bone (do fractures count?) - I have eaten a waffle today - I know what I want to do in life - I speak at least two languages (not fluently) - I have made a new friend in the past year
@smstransformers
age: 16
birthplace: auckland, nz
current time: 4:19 pm rn!!!
drink you last had: i just skulled half a liter of water whoops
favourite song: jesus etc. | wilco if we're talking abt an all-time favourite
grossest memory: accidentally swallowing a bee when i was seven years old (somehow nothing bad happened?)
horror, yes or no: not unless it’s an incredibly tame horror t b h, my threshold for scariness is very low
in love: i believe so!
jealous of people: lots of times, over really dumb things
love by first sight or should I walk by again: i believe that infatuation can exist at first sight but true love not so much. wish that could happen tho :C
middle name: shane!
siblings: my sister is eight years old, and my brother is seven!
one wish: EZ, make my anxiety disappear, i’d have a much more productive life
song i last sang: jupiter | haiku hands
time i woke up: 7:13, woke up immediately because i usually like to wake at 6:30
underwear colour: blue + purble
vacation destination: auckland / kingston / sydney!
worst habit: not remembering to make my goddamn bed, it looks like garbage
favourite food: mashed potatoes….
zodiac sign: sagittarius !!!
@alyonian
relationship status:
at the moment i’m single! and while being in a relationship sounds brilliant, the last two relationships i was involved in? didn’t work out to say the least, lucky i’m still young
favourite colour:
it’s been emerald green for the longest time but orange seems to be dethroning it at a steady pace
lipstick or chapstick:
i haven’t used chapstick since i was six but i probably should use it again, water is my substitute rn fdghdgh - and i haven’t ever used lipstick in any capacity? so i’d have to go with the former
last song i listened to:
the space traveller’s lullaby | kamasi washington - i’m trying to get through his second album rn (i left off on the second disk yesterday) and while everything he makes is undeniably amazing, it’s? a three hour album? i don’t have the attention span for his spiritual jazz, as great as it is
last movie:
monsters inc is playing on the television right now, i’ll go with that! the animation aged kinda badly but it’s still such a fun movie! sidenote: james p. sullivan? a childhood crush, so this gives me memories
top 3 tv shows/podcasts/comics:
i rarely, if ever, venture into these forms of media but! if i had to answer, i’d say;
unbreakable kimmy schmidt / parks & recreation / luke cage
taz / mbmbam (i havent like. watched a full episode of either but they seem cool,)
tf idw / …………. yeah that’s it, i’ve never read anything else. probably should!
additional favs:
my friends, writing (in theory), listening to video essays, learning music theory + instruments and understanding audio production software
top 3 bands / artists:
HHH okay if i had to limit my choices to just three artists, uh. lorde, the mountain goats, and sophie. i couldnt even fit janelle in i hate th is
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@alyonian
color(s): light colors are always nice and pleasant, though anything peachy and sandy are the best! orange (specially pastel orange) is like. the best thing
last band t-shirt i bought: usually merchandising is very expensive and i dont have the money to accommodate that, but like. i do recall having a wiggles shirt when i was five. i wore it all the time, shjdjgsksd im sure that counts
last band i saw live: i almost went to splendor in the grass last year with family, which wasn't only cool since i’ve never been out of the state since i immigrated - the festival was in queensland, which is around a two hour flight from victoria - but the lineup was pretty fuckin lit too! the xx, haim, peking duk, tash sultana, future islands, vallis alps, a.b original,, i was p excited! unfortunately my uncle fell ill and so they had to give the tickets to extended family :( otherwise, i haven't been to a single concert in my life
last song i listened to: street fighter mas | kamasi washington - up to this song on the album and i really fuckin dig this! also the video is hypnotizing
last movie i watched: monsters inc is about to finish and up next is monsters university! which like…. honestly, this is an extremely unpopular opinion but, i like it just as much as the original? my opinion might be skewed because i’m a monster [hugger], but i like everything abt the movie! except for the finale of the scare games and the last five minutes of the movie, both were just. dreadful.
last three tv shows i watched: if aggretsuko counts that’s the last series i watched of my own volition, which is a miracle in itself considering that’s legit only the second anime i’ve watched to completion (the first being shirokuma cafe, which i probably need to re-watch). otherwise, the last two shows i had beared witness to were thirteen reasons why and queer eye bc my cousin put them on! that first show i could completely do without but queer eye is iconique
last 3 characters i identified with: grimlock (legit. all of them), urdnot grunt (mass effect) and vector the crocodile (sth), i’m not sure what this says about me other than Big
book(s) i’m currently reading: i’m reading ‘maus’ by art spiegelman at the moment, for the third time i believe? i believe my classmates are supposed to be writing an essay on this next term and shit, this novel is heartbreaking, i haven't been this emotional when reading a book than… ever, really. it’s a recommendation of the highest caliber
@victorion
name: leon / lionel, i picked up the second name because i was in a server with an admin that was also a Leon™
nickname: besides ‘Big Gay’ i also have the nickname ‘lemon lion’ which is! nice!!
zodiac sign: archer man
height: Tall™
language(s) spoken: english / some maori + italian
fav fruit: watermelons (only when in season)
fav scent: the smell of a freezer tbh? it just smells Nice i don’t know how to properly explain it
fav season: spring! the breezes are welcoming without being overbearingly freezing
fav color: ornge,,,,
fav animal: SHARKS + CROCS + FERRETS
coffee, tea or hot chocolate: tea! with some milk tho
average hrs of sleep: too little
fav fictional character: One character?????? uhhhhhhh……. like. biggest cc right now is either idw skids or oz from monster prom
no. of blankets you sleep with: depending on my mood but i’d say the average is like, 3??
fav songs: i quickly whipped up some songs i listen to
fav artists: i came to the realization that i like acts that are considered ‘bad’ like maroon 5/drake/lil yachty etc in specific doses… i wouldn't call them good yet, but! i have no beef and thats good
fav books: remember ‘where the wild things are’??? that shit was like. literal childhood, man.. :happytears: i really need to look for a copy again
@thonany-klieme
name: leon / lionel, interchangeable really
gender: male, im probs an nb guy
star sign: sagittarius!
height: 6’1
sexuality: gay??? im not sure, im mostly attracted to other guys but i have had very brief crushes on girls + nb people? sexuality’s confusing so im gonna just latch to the gaybel (gay label) for now
lock screen image: its the album cover of 1992 deluxe by princess nokia, tho it was “T Hanos” a few days ago since i change it often - my home screen is venom but his torso says ‘fuck machine’
ever had a crush on a teacher: no??
where do you see yourself in ten years: ideally i’m teaching kids math n english, realistically i’m probably going down with the political climate
if you could go anywhere, where would you go: new zealand!! or the netherlands
what was your favorite halloween costume: halloween is not big at all where i live, the only time i tried trick or treating was when i was like 7?? i threw a bedsheet on myself and pretended to be a ghost, though since there were no eyeholes + the sheet was blue, it looked more like i was just a moving lump
last kiss: never had one
have you ever been to las vegas: nah and i dont plan to?? how do you handle regular days of 40C wtf
favorite pair of shoes: i have this pair of jandals that ive worn for a fair bit longer than my other pair of shoes, tho i only wear them in summer + very warm nights
favorite book: ngl its. ‘the very hungry caterpillar’ by eric carle. i just, love it alot and i cant explain w h y
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