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imlosingmyfuckingmindgirl · 1 year

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past week, jan 8.

well well, it is 2314 at night as im writing this, my one roomie is talking to someone and other roomie is out talking to his friend but was supposed to get me water. fuck him. i seriously love frank ocean. im bout to cry my ass out on white ferrari. first lemme hit nights. past week was FUCKING EXHAUSTING. it was all midsems, every night study while not retaining anything in the morning. sometimes i was completely blacked out on the papers. man i hated this week so much. i think i will score very very poor in this midsem. i dont know how will i face my parents when i tell them my score. im scared, on the big god. im scared as fuck. apart from proff comms, i dont think i will score a decent score on any paper. it was so bad. let's see what happens on 11th as i get fucked from others' reaction. fuck this exam season. apart from that, my parents went to my sister's place to take care of her while she is developing her twins (manifesting is strong here vro). it caught me offguard that they went home, it was so unexpected. but its okay, they are together. she needs them, more than me. and you know i always let go only to find out later that i dont. white ferrari, good times. i don't wanna do this anymore, i think im fucking depressed. i would have not forgiven myself if lexa killed herself that new year's eve night. she told me that she was going to do it. but could not. i dont know if i can save her but i will try my best. i care for her, i fucking do. i fucking care for her as if she were my girl. even though i exist for her only in her mind. she told my she has this college debt and she could not pay it back and how she is a dissapointment and all that negative manifestation. i freed her from all that, all i could. i just dont want her to go out like that. she has been thru it all. i know. she is very brave and i will let her know it. i wont let her die. my backside pains so much as i am typing this. our whole hostel is victimized by covid, i think. everyone is falling sick. gods grace im okay till now. please let me be okay, god. im outchere, drinking mojitos and cokes and shit while these guys are suffering. god i spent reckless today. my fucking tire burst. spend 630 on that. ate some good shit for dinner 175 for that. i been spending like racks. i am guilting myself over it. and i have no remorse. guilt is overrated anyway. i dont know why, i just feel sad. like bruh lemme be happy one night. i just feel like all my family problems are caused by me. i dont feel my emotions unless and until i write them down. now its hitting me. just saw a reel stating that her mom is in depression and it shows her pampering her mother like her own child. just pictured it with my own mom crying and now i cannot sleep. somenights i just wanna cry my eyes out. like soak this pillow wet. If you think about it, it'll be over in no time And that's life. im tired of moving, im tired of aching. i dont wanna do this anymore, i just wanna cry until i die. nicoles new album just came out and i vibed to that while the full moon was out. it was fucking beautiful. i pictured death and its beautiful. i love her. and i dont love people. i love you mom, and dad and my sister. but sorry if i lose some battles. i hope i make it out. peace, tommorow is my music audition plus my physics lab, wish me luck. peace to every crease. -alister.

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kelvinstudio2 · 3 years

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Further Cave Analysis

MIDSEM BREAK

Nippara Caves:

I like the large open space in the cave from the image. I could definitely fit a large installation onto the surrounding areas of the path where people could drink and admire the amazing geography.

However, watching a video of the path entering into the cave, I noticed it is very narrow and requires people to duck and dodge the formations carefully to get through. The stairs are also quite steep which does not seem very suitable for a drunk person to navigate through.

I could reinforce some ramps into the space and create soft barriers around the walls to prevent injuries to the people and the space.

Ryugu Cave:

I like how it is directly located off the road, simply taking a 2 min walk down some stairs to the cave entrance. It is free to enter and has a sun roof on top where people can walk up to to view the space down below.

The waves move frequently, creating an impact and noisy environment that would be compatible with social drinking. The cave level visibility move with the tide moving up and down, constantly a moving space. It has been known as the place of good luck and romance.

Shimoda District is a popular tourist attraction spot, having many hotels and a ski resort for people wanting to get away from a bustling lifestyle. There are bus stops all the way round the area connecting up to domestic train stations, allowing fluent access into the area. Shimoda also has historical importance as the landing place of several of Commodore Perry's "Black ships" in 1854. This event marked the end of Japan's era of "isolation" and start of "diplomatic relations" between US and Japan.

Videos:

Nippara Cave:https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T8VCfF_GazM&ab_channel=LALAINELEE ( Start 12:20 )

Ryugu Cave: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7m3XNni4SdU

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chimielie · 3 years

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I've been putting off reading your iwaizumi series for so long bc I knew it'd kill me to have to wait,,,,,

Tonight I'm gonna be done w my midsems and literally all I'm looking forward to is curling up w a cup of coffee and finally reading it

<3 ty for your work <3

omg good luck on ur exams!!! you’ll do great <3

i hope you enjoy!! it means a lot that my work is gonna help u destress :’)

also pls enjoy that coffee bc i can’t have it (headaches) and i miss it HAHAHAH i’m living thru u anon

#i dont think i did too bad w favor the brave if i do say so myself #lmao #ask n answer #anon!

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medicallybl0nde · 5 years

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I finally got through all the cardio lectures! Next up is the few respiratory components and then the pracs. Hopefully I’ll get all that done by tomorrow night so I can spend saturday and monday doing extra revision

I got my results back for that dumb lab report, my second stats assignment, and my virology exam. 95% for the report, 77.5% for the assignment, and 90.7% for the exam..not too bad. I must say getting 90′s is fun but also gives me this weird feeling of disappointment for getting so close to 100 but not achieving it. the 77.5% on the assignment was more than I was expecting for a math based unit but still not the HD I promised myself I’d be getting in all units.

I’m a little disappointed with where I’m at with my studies at the moment. which is harsh considering this time last year I was doing only 3 units and failing 2 of them. But I have such a big journey ahead of me and I can’t let any part of me go soft just because I’ve “come so far”...I can’t afford to be like “wow look how good I’ve been I’m going to let myself rest for a second” because that’s how you lose your shit y’know. I feel like lately I’ve been losing it a little, I’ve hardly studied at all for chem and stats. I’m only just now catching up on physiology with less than a week to go till the midsem. the only unit I’m excelling at near perfectly is medical microbiology...because, well, at my absolute core I’m a microbiologist. My AIMS majors (if I sit the AIMS year) will be microbiology, immunology, and probably biochem. It’s so hard to tell my brain to let go of micro a little so I can concentrate on the other units. I just naturally gravitate towards the lab sciences.

Putting all these thoughts aside for a minute, I am leaning more and more towards doing the AIMS year no matter what (meaning even if I qualify to apply for med school next year I’ll wait the extra year) the more I think about it the more I get excited to graduate an AIMS accredited laboratory medical scientist. and the fourth year with a good gamsat score will mean it’ll be almost guaranteed I can get into unimelb... which is the #1 med school in australia and 17th in the world (which seems pretty low on the list but considering there is 100+ med schools just in the US alone not including another 100+ in the UK and even more with the combined other countries....it’s a big deal)

If I cap my undergrad a year early and graduate at the end of next year, with perfect grades, I’d never get anywhere near unimelb. it’s still a possibility I’ll apply next year but yeah, if I do the AIMS year....I’ll get into a better school and get out of this city. kind of a good trade for an extra year of my life. I get to spend it in a lab and by the end of it I’ll be in a good position to get into the best med school in the country and therefor become one of the countries best med students. (as long as my grades stay up for this year and next)

back to study stuff: basically, I’m mad at myself for my study schedule in sem 1, I’ve hardly put any effort into my time management and I’m going to really need to strap in for finals in 2 months. I’m definitely going to spend winter break reviewing my approach to study schedules (whilst gamsat prepping)

Anyways, wish me luck for this physiology midsem on cardio and resp. ta.

#personal #study update #studyblr #physiology #everything hurts #an honest critical self review of my current approach to how i study #im shit

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onewomancitadel · 3 years

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My fic is going eh. School’s been a pain, especially with midterms already. Haven’t had a lot of time on my hands to be able to do anything really. I’ve managed to write around 1/3rd of the one-shot completely (edited and everything) but I NEED a break from all this studying lol. I’ll send you it first once it’s finished to read through it and see if there’s anything I could do to improve it. Until then, I have a Psych Exam tomorrow.

Aw well I hope you can find some time to work on it and have fun. (: Happy to help out (:

Good luck on your psych exam tomorrow!!! I've heard bad things about midterms lol. I think the only midsem I've had was for Greek, that wasn't too bad and pretty relaxed. Otherwise most of the assessment I've done has been weighted towards the end of the semester so you've got the frog boil time in between lol.

Wishing you the best and hope you get a break soon. <3

#seraphina's asks #user: iressent #the final Greek exam was the one that drove me reaaaally crazy #I worked so hard to psychoanalyse my teacher to figure out what would be on the test #based on what he said in class #there was this special genitive construction I was dead certain was going to be on the midsem and it WASN'T #I was right about everything else I guessed and prepared for so it was okay lol

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andromedamemes · 7 years

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so my students just had a midsem recently where the average mark was below a pass

WELCOME TO UNI, FIRSTYEARS

#and if ur worried about my students #dont be #the lecturer pretty much set them up for failure as a learning experience #if they do better on teh final then their midsem mark doesnt count at all #which soudns great in theory #but the average mark for the final is usually 50%#good luck kiddos

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themonstersaidit · 7 years

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The Best Place is in Your Arms

30 Day OTP Challenge but not really Day 2: Cuddling Ship: Rin/Miku Genre: Romance/Hurt/Comfort Rating: T

—It was on days like these when Rin's hugs could save lives.

•

Miku, on most days, would consider herself an optimist. You know, one of the 'glass half full', 'better late than never' kind of people.

So, yeah. Most of the time—let's say, 80% of the time—she was an optimist. Usually, she'd brush off the bad and continue on with her daily life, as if nothing ever happened.

But today was not one of those days.

It didn't help that her alarm clock didn't go off, making her late for her lecture, or that she had a series of potentially scarring dreams the night before involving her Ex With Bad Breath and current girlfriend, Rin. During the morning rush, she wondered whether she was actually still in an uncomfortable relationship with her ex, and whether Rin had actually broken up with her in real life or not. (At least, until Rin texted her, greeting her with good morning.)

The weather outside was miserable, not to mention. It'd been raining all morning, and by the time she arrived at university, she was very, very wet. (So much that, she had to go to the bathroom to wring out her pigtails.)

She also deeply regret wearing fabric shoes. She thought she'd learnt her lesson from the last time she made that mistake, but no, apparently not so.

Despite making it in time to attend the last 15 minutes of her lecture, the day continued to throw misfortune after misfortune at her.

During her tutorial later that day, she received grades back from a mid-semester exam she spent a very long time studying for, to discover she’d only just passed. Then, at lunch, she knocked her tea and spilt it all over her laptop keyboard, notes, and herself.

"Today couldn't get any worse, could it," Miku muttered to herself, as she proceeded to drop her bag in a puddle while on the way to her next class.

Why.

After a long day of bad luck, she was very ready to go home and cry. She wondered to herself if she had any chocolate to binge out on, but judging by the trend today was following, probably not.

Ding.

Miku blinked, startled out of her daze by a message notification on her phone. She was on the bus home now, eager to peel off her soggy, tea-smelling clothes and wrap herself into a sad burrito. But it would still be another hour or so until she could do that, unfortunately.

(1) New Message from Rin

An uneasy feeling made home in her stomach. She had a feeling she'd forgotten something… important…

Miku! Are you okay? I haven't heard from you all day, the text said. Are you still okay to go bowling tonight with Len and Kaito?

Right.

Yes.

There was that.

She sighed, fighting her urge to burst into tears right there and then. Of course she'd forgotten that. It was the last thing she wanted to do, after such a day.

Miku inhaled, trying to calm herself and think of a way to tell Rin she wasn't up for tonight's plans. She felt bad, but… she really just wanted to be miserable at home.

I'm sorry for not messaging you today, it's been hectic. I didn't realise I forgot to reply to your text this morning.

She paused, frowning to herself.

Also… I feel really bad because this is just inconveniencing everyone… but I haven't been feeling well today, and think it's best I stay home tonight rather than go bowling. I'm really sorry, Rin. I don't mind if you guys go out without me, I completely understand.

A pang of guilt filled her chest as she reread the message and sent it. Before she could take back what she said, she put her phone away, not wanting to read Rin's disappointed replies.

She took a steady breath to hold her composure. Conceal, don't feel, she told herself repeatedly – though the Frozen reference wasn't really helping to make her feel better.

•

Miku trudged into the foyer at her dorm. She was completely and utterly defeated; her umbrella decided to fail her while she was walking home from the train station, resulting in unsparing wetness.

She shed a few tears in the rain on her way home, mourning the condition of potentially everything in her backpack. Despite that, she still planned to cry some more once she arrived at her room.

"Miku?" called a familiar voice.

She looked up, alarmed.

Rin had stood from one of the waiting chairs in the foyer and was approaching her. The blonde reached out to pull her into a dry, warm hug, burrowing her head into her chest.

Once she pulled away, she said, "Miku! Are you okay? You didn't reply to any of my other texts and I was worried something had happened. I came here as soon as I could to check in on you." She paused, blinking in confusion as if she just came to realise something. "Why are you so wet?"

Why…?

Miku felt overwhelmed, not expecting Rin to have travelled all the way to see her. She opened her mouth, wanting to say, "My umbrella broke," but rather than speaking, she began to cry very hideously instead.

Rin's eyes widened and she placed her hands on her cheeks. "No, Miku! It's okay! I'm not mad or anything, I was just worried! But it's okay!"

"I'm sorry…" she blubbered in between sobs.

Her girlfriend hushed her, wiping at her tears gently. "It's okay, really. Look – let's go upstairs and talk about it. You should probably dry up before you catch a cold, as well."

They walked upstairs to her room, Rin with one arm around her waist and another holding her bag. Miku just cried the entire time, no longer caring what the other dorm residents thought of her.

When they got inside, Rin sat Miku down on her bed, turning away to rummage through her drawers for a fresh change of clothes. Knowing her well, she pulled out a comfortable pair of trousers and her favourite fluffy jumper.

Miku dried and changed herself, and after hanging her wet clothes to dry in the bathroom, Rin returned to make some tea. She handed a cup to Miku, who took it with caution and stared down into the dark liquid.

"Talk to me," Rin said, sitting across from her on her desk chair. "Tell me what's upset you."

Her girlfriend looked adamant on hearing her answer – and she knew full and well that the blonde wouldn't give up until she got something out of her. She could be quite stubborn at times.

Miku took a breath, and reluctantly began recalling the series of unfortunate events that took place earlier that day.

After crying her heart out to Rin for half an hour, the blonde offered to stay over that night and help Miku dry all her textbooks.

"Are you sure?" the teal-haired girl asked. "Don't you have assessment due soon?"

Rin shrugged. "It's fine. I'm pretty on top of everything, I think. Plus," she paused to scoot to her side, wrapping an arm around her shoulder, "I want to spend time with you anyway."

"Drying textbooks with a hairdryer doesn't sound very fun, though," Miku mumbled.

Her girlfriend smiled, tapping the tip of her nose. "Any time spent with you is fun, Miku."

She smiled back, cheeks turning pink. "Don't flatter me."

Rin pulled a face, before cupping her chin in her hands, leaning forward to kiss her on the lips. "I love you."

"I love you too, Rin."

She wrapped her arms around Miku's waist and leant into her chest with a sigh. Miku rested her chin on the top of her head, placing her hands on her back and feeling the warmth of her body radiate through. It was on days like these when Rin's hugs could save lives.

Though ashamed to admit it, she was glad that Rin had come to see her. She knew that sitting in her room, being miserable, while her girlfriend was out having fun with their friends would only make her feel worse.

She was so lucky to have her.

hi my name is cha and I’ve been procrastinating uploading this to tumblr I’m very sorry.

But now it is here, so life is good. I’m also on break for a week, so life is very good! ...except I still have 3484647438243 more midsem exams after break; alas, the suffering never ends.

I’m still forever stuck on Day 3′s prompt. How do you write to that prompt without it being Boring... Basic... and Cliche?

Anyway, A/N from ffnet time:

So often same-sex relationships are portrayed explicitly/unrealistically or just as some terrifying OH my God Forbidden Love! trope and I just wanted something cute and warm (and I tried, I really did try,) but I'm not sure whether it was as cute and warm as I was intending.

One day I will get my writing mojo back, wherever it has gone...

(The rest was a rant so I’ll leave it out for now until it becomes Relevant lol)

#fanfiction #vocaloid #vocaloid fanfiction #rinmiku #mikurin

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kelvinstudio2 · 3 years

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Potential Design for Existing caves in Japan

MIDSEM BREAK

1. Sunamaya Beach Cave Arch ( Okinawa, Japan)

- A popular tourist attraction offering lovely views onto surrounding islands.

- A romantic setting where you can watch the sunset under an arch cave creating a tunnel between land and water. A threshold point connecting the two together.

Users could sit on the rocks or sand and share drinks as they watch the sunset or come at night during low tide with lamps and make a bonfire

2. Ryugu Cave Island ( Shizuoka prefecture)

- A heart shaped island cave sitting on Izu Peninsula

- Known as the spot that brings good luck, love and romance.

- Includes a stairway from up top down to the opening centre of the cave.

- small beach space with high rocky walls provides an intimate area to share with people

3. Nippara Limestone caves ( Tama Region, Tokyo)

- Deep underground cave holding many underground shrines and holy places of japan.

- They are accessible by taking the train to Okutama station and then the bus to Shonyudo bus stop, which is a five-minute walk away from the cave entrance.

- Feelings of calmness and peace draw people to the site.

4. Senbutsu Limestone River Caves ( Fukuoka, Japan)

- A child and family friendly equipment free cave walk through a river.

-many flat surfaces to sit and catch a breath through the walk.

-Constant flowing of water creates a noisy and exhilarating atmosphere where having a few drinks could enhance this experience.

( Could consider making a hike-safe bottle like plastic or silicon to hold liquid well through movement )

https://www.pinterest.nz/pin/434808539024633143/

https://thegate12.com/article/70

https://en.japantravel.com/fukuoka/senbutsu-limestone-cave/36352

https://www.nationalgeographic.com/travel/article/sponsor-content-an-adventure-lover-s-guide-to-spelunking-in-toky0

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