#he’d never see me coming

[designernishiki]

it’s kinda funny to me how that dumb scene in kiwami 1 of majima getting shot and left for dead in the harbor was basically just added as a half-assed way to explain majima not being around for a bit of the plot, but they accidentally(?) just made it seem like start of a chain reaction where majima ended up feeling slighted and heartbroken after being abandoned like that and then lashed out about it via smashing a big truck into the building kiryu was in. and yeah that isn’t inherently a romantic thing as-is but then they go and add the part where majima grabs a hostess and performatively hits on her as in-kiryu’s-face as possible, she says she’s already in love with someone, and majima lets her go immediately, no questions asked, making a big fucking point of it just to say see THAT kiryu? I appreciate when people are HONEST about their FEELINGS. people who won’t just BACKSTAB someone who CARES about them to save themselves. is that so crazy kiryu?? huh??? anyway make it up to me get down here and fight me right fucking now

#I think on another level he was sorta saying like ‘hey kiryu. you’re making it extremely clear that you don’t trust me and my intentions #and I’ve been trying to show you- over and over again- that I’d do just about anything for you and your safety #but I can’t just let my mask fall off in front of everyone- I need to keep up the unpredictable morally grey wildcard act for both my sake #AND yours. because disguising my helping you as crazy random violent outbursts and weird stalker behavior #is the only way I CAN help you. do you think it would go over well with shimano or literally anyone else if I was outright helping you out #of the kindness of my heart and fondness for you? stop being so fucking dense and look past the crazy wacky nonsense for a second and #maybe you’ll realize that all I do at the end of the day- really- is help you and put my own life and reputation on the line for you. #I am an honest guy when it comes to my real values and when I told you I wouldn’t let anyone kill you unelss it was myself- I meant it. #I’ve taken a knife and a bullet for you now. can you REALLY not see through the act yet? am I REALLY that unpredictable when you think about #it?’ #that was a longer explanation than i intended but. it was difficult to put into words #I basically feel like it could be read as him implying kiryu shouldn’t backstab the people who put themselves on the line to help him #and/or pointing out that he’s never actually done kiryu dirty and has stuck to his word protecting him in the ways he can #trying to say yeah all this is a crazy act and all but when it comes down to it you Can trust me #it really makes sense when you think about it that he’d have to help kiryu/show affection towards kiryu in unpredictable convoluted ways #at that point in time because. I mean. there’s a reason he was the only person who showed up to welcome kiryu when he got out of prison #and that’s because A) he sticks to his word and his loyalty to people he cares about and B) no one else had the balls or the batshit insane #mask to wear to ward off anyone asking real questions like majima did. because ANYONE associating themselves with the supposed #patriarch-killer was a HUGE NO-NO at the time. someone important showing up for kiryu and welcoming him back outright could’ve caused #all-out warfare probably. except majima. because majima was dedicated and smart enough to use his widely-feared wildcard persona #(that everyone tended to view as incapable of having any Real agenda to worry about) to his And kiryu’s advantage #does that make sense??? I feel like it makes a lot of sense if you get it to click in your head #kazumaji #majima #kiryu #yakuza #kiwami 1 #yk1 #rambling

[shima-draws]

Just got back from my friend’s wedding :’) I think it says a lot that I was the only high school friend that showed up

#TBF the others in our friend group back then live in different states now #And flying out for a wedding can be SO expensive. #But yeah idk it just meant a lot to me :’) #And my friend (the groom) was SO happy to see me. And his family was too #That made me really glad 🤧 #The fact that he invited me to come at all also says a lot I think #And you know what maybe I cried on the way home in the car but that’s nobody’s business but mine!! #I’m very very happy for him. And his wife is SO sweet and so pretty #It’s just weird yk? Cause in high school I liked this guy SO much #Like I daydreamed about getting married to him some day #So seeing him marrying someone else felt very weird lol #Bittersweet mostly #Sorry this is super embarrassing LMAO but it’s not like I’m ever going to tell this to his face. #I know they’ll be very happy together and I’m so so glad he found someone that fits together with him so well #He’d better come to MY wedding tho. In the future. LOL #Shima speaks #It was a very ‘saying goodbye to your first love’ kind of thing. #Even after I confessed to him in high school (and got rejected) I never really stopped liking him #Like I just never got over it I guess. Even tho I KNEW nothing would ever come of it #Idk sometimes it’s hard to let that stuff go! It’s hard to stop liking someone after you liked them for so long and so strongly #I want to say I’m over it now but considering I was crying in my car: #Well. JFJSJMFMSMSNN #I know I don’t feel that way for him anymore like as a fact but. Idk it was weird— #Again bittersweet. I think I just needed a second to process and really let it sink in #Goodbye to my high school fantasy //waves a handkerchieff #Also MAYBE I saw them be so happy and was like. Why can’t I have that with someone. HUH #Leetle jealous. I need to find me a someone *squint emoji* #Anyway rant over wedding was good I’m just an idiot ;)

[cowardlykrow]

I’ve never been a fandom oc person, but Im having ideas and they haunt me

#//not art? gross #he’d be a field reporter which means I can draw him in many situations #and he’d be like a stand in for the audience to see the absolute insanity that goes on in Hatchetfield #problem is I’m not creative enough to come up with those situations that aren’t cannon #it’d also force me to draw backgrounds #He will never be made but he can live rent free in my head #no findable tags because this is me talking to the air #//Cawcawcaaaw

[miametropolis]

ten in the journey’s end makes me so goddamn mad…rose punched through MULTIPLE dimensions, tracked you through all of time and space, single-handedly saved Donna while you were doing fuck all in a market, gave EVERYTHING to find you again and ALL. SHE. WANTS. IS. FOR. YOU. TO. LOOK AT HER!! WHY WON’T YOU LOOK AT HER ITS ROSE!! ITS THE HEART OF YOUR HEARTS!! YOU COULD EACH DIE ANY SECOND NOW HOW MANY YEARS HAVE YOU SPENT WISHING YOU ACTED SOONER HOW MANY YEARS HAS SHE WAITED FOR YOU, BURNED HOLES IN THE UNIVERSE FOR YOU AND YOU’RE STILL! LOOKING! AWAY!

#WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOURE HUGGING HER??? FRENCH THAT GIRL!!!! #MARTHA WAS MORE EXCITED TO SEE HER THAN YOU!!! #somehow stephen moffat returned…. #we really need to explore what the fuck would have happened if the metacrisis ten never existed bc WHAT was he going to do about her… #they were all alone inside davros’s little cave. just the two of them. and every glance she gives him is so full of love and care. #and he can’t look back. why can’t he look back #what happened. #what happened to if I believe in anything I believe in her what happened to how long will you stay with me #what happened to the way he looked at her on Christmas Eve as they charted out the stars #WHAT HAPPENED!!!! #the entire arc of doctor Who from seasons ONE to four has been that Rose Tyler is the center of the Doctor’s universe #one touch from her reanimates him he’d bend worlds for her he couldn’t save the world but lose her #she looks into the time vortex and rearranges time and space for him he kisses her and saves her and saves her and saves her #when he loses her he FALLS APART #he spends 12 episodes descending into literal suicidal madness for GRIEF of losing her #and then he gets her back. #SHE comes back #SHE defies the laws of UNIVERSES to get back to him #AND HE DOESNT !! LOOK !! BACK!! #im losing my mind #doctor who #rose tyler #tenrose #timepetals #tenth doctor #10th doctor

[otrtbs]

i see the vision of baseball james and i raise you, baseball james tripping into the base cuz he saw regulus for the first time and thinks he’s so pretty

AHHHH!!!!!! AND JAMES WOULD BE SO OBVIOUS ABT IT

barty seeing the whole thing like “was he just looking at u? 😒”

and regulus w eyes as wide as saucers so deadpan being like “no.”

#asks #then sirius noticing regulus bc james was staring and being like #REGGIE BABY REGGIE U NEVER COME TO WATCH ME PLAY #and then he’d be like ‘OH UR NOT HERE FOR *ME* I SEE’ #he would yell it across the diamond and embarrass everybody

[liesandbrokenhearts]

The beautiful unspoken scenes we get from Kendall alone in Succession where absolutely no dialogue is needed because we know exactly how he’s feeling…. Yeah

#reminds me of their mom saying that Logan should never have a dog because he’d kick him just to see how long it’d take for it to come back #succession #kendall Roy #Logan Roy

[wild-moss-art]

Bruhhh I think the guy that used to live at my place is breaking into my mailbox regularly 😭

#it’s a long story I’ve been finding it open or half open in the morning fairly often #and I do get important mail for him which is what I think he’s looking for. I’ve never had anything important go missing #but like. he KNOWS I’m willing to give him his mail bc at first I’d text him and he’d say he’d come get it but never would #if he’d just communicate w me he wouldn’t have to fucking break into my mailbox #and like I get IMPORTANT mail for him like tax docs!!!! #during covid I got his covid relief checks!!!!!! #I get stuff for his business!!!!!! #he even had his groceries delivered here once…… he did come get those #he could just text me instead of taking a crowbar to my fucking mailbox!!!!!!! #he is so weird I actually think he never updated his government address from my place #like. if he’s homeless or smth I get it and im fine with it. but I need him to tell me and not break into my shit #he has given me a ton of other red flags too. I just don’t know what his deal is #I don’t need to get into it too much but the state of the house and interacting with him has always been so confusing #and I’ve lived here for over 2 years at this point!!!!! #I’m gonna have a chat w my post officer next time I see her and see what she recommends

[kimtaegis]

making gifs has been terribly depressing lately if I actually let myself think about it dgfgfhg

#a comeback has never been THIS dead on here I actually feel a little sorry for taehyung (not that he’d care but. y’know lol) #there’s so much content and no one here to enjoy it with anymore it feels #except for like 50 loyal warriors who still active cc’s owe their life to. I see you and I love you #but that's really not many people considering the size of the fandom #seriously where is everyone??? did you move on from tumblr.....come back and tell me how. work doesn't seem to be enough for me #it's never been this deserted before in such an 'active' time #probably until jk’s next comeback then everyone will rise from the dead again lmao #but yeah it’s a pity I don't know about you but new tae content everyday is what keeps me from offing myself these days. cheers

[selfindulgentfandomstuff]

I miss him

#/srs btw this is about my cat Joel who passed away a couple months ago #he was Amelia’s brother. he was an orange tiger kitty and so chunky and cuddleable #and oh how he loved to be pet and coddled by ppl he trusted #he was a skittish cat in general with a LOT of anxiety but he loved us so much.. me and one of my brothers in particular #it was always a gamble to see who he’d choose ! #god I miss that cat. I never even got to say goodbye. #I was away pet sitting for someone we know when I got the call he was going into the vets for emergency surgery #and that he didn’t make it out #the last time I saw him he seemed so fine and normal #I never would’ve left his side if I knew what was coming #I’m so sorry Joel.. I love you #vent #vent tw #tw vent #tw animal death #tw pet death

[gottagobackintime]

Me at work: *Talks on the phone constantly, every day, Monday to Friday, no problem*

Me at home: *Makes a phone call and end up sweating profusely*

#no but I’ve always hated talking on the phone #and then I ended up working as a temp #and I have to take calls and make calls every day and I was surprised that I was fine doing it #and now I had to make a phonecall because I’m planning on buying a cat for my brother #and I was honestly sweating when I hung up #I’ve never been as much of an adult as I was in that moment when I called the person with the cat #to set up a time to go see it #great scott my life is heavy #also kind of funny but I went downstairs to ask my mum if she wants to come with me #to look and my dad was like to look at what?? #and I was like 😬 I think you know haha #he said that after our last cat passed away in 2021 at the age of 18 that there would be no more cats #yeah… he said that before we got her too #we already had a cat then and I came home like there’s a classmate that has kittens and we need to get one! #and my dad was like nope and my mum went to pick one out #and he loved her he’s a softie and honestly he’d never say no to getting a pet #he’s just being a dad about it

[designernishiki]

You asked for a fic rec so I’ll toss this one at ya: https://archiveofourown.org/works/46767358?view_full_work=true Stick through the formatting for the characterization, tone, and really the whole vibe of this fic. I haven’t been able to get the bathroom call between Daigo and Majima out of my head for weeks since I read it with how naturally it all flows. My own little Daigo characterization booklet to review when I feel like I need a refresher on him.

so I may have stayed up until 6am reading this (would’ve slept earlier but I couldn’t stop reading it) and hgggahaghhhhaggahshhhhhhhh that was one of the most well-characterized fics I’ve ever read what the fuck. like the differences in how each character speaks (both tone-wise and in differing levels of authenticity) and how they speak to specific others (the daigo and majima dyanmic specifically- how they actually take into account how long they’ve been working really closely- SO good), the mental anguish and chaos vs the overwhelming emptiness of being daigo dojima but no longer The 6th Chairman Daigo Dojima……….I could keep going but I think you get it.

tbh I’d been wanting to write something exploring a similar set of dynamics/situation (post-kiryu’s fake death, interactions with haruka, daigo, and/or majima specifically, reflecting on his shortcomings while acknowledging the heavy Grief left behind) but now I’m like. well I still could but this was so well written in regards to daigo and haruka that, as far as something between those two goes, I don’t feel the need to.

thanks for the recommendation! my brain is broken now (affectionate)

#rambling #fics #fic rec #there’s a little bit of minedai in there via flashback but I don’t know if im gonna put this in my minedai tag cause it’s really #not tecccchnically a minedai fic. it’s just. a daigo-centric fic/study more than anything #my favorite more lighthearted moment in this story is daigo talking to haruka in Okinawa after like 3 years and hearing about her #‘situationship’ with yuta and how it’s just more convenient to tell people they’re a legit couple and daigo’s immediate response on impulse #is just. ‘that must be nice. I mean that you can do that. if it were two guys or two girls or something you wouldn’t be able to do that.’ #or something like that and simultaneously sweating because he has no fucking idea why he’s saying that and can’t find a way to abort #my only critique is that I was hoping he’d come out to her (probably on the scene after that where it’s just them sitting on the deck) #and it wouldn’t even have to be a Big Thing it’s just. it felt like it was leading up to that (whether coming out on purpose or on accident) #but ah well #don’t get me wrong I think she could probably figure it out on her own based on the fact that daigo’s never had a girlfriend to her #knowledge and is in his 40s + that weird little gay tangent he went on earlier out of the blue #if anyone could pick it up though context clues and hints it’d be haruka and akiyama The Investigators. and oh no. looks like that’s #exactly who he’s stuck with #id love to see an update cause of this oh mannnn #(if anyone could pick it up it’d be those two + also majima but I kinda figured at this point majima would almost certainly already know #they seem like they have a mutual (possibly unspoken) recognition of one another on that front. based a little on what daigo says about #‘when kiryu says jump you say how high’ and majima floundering a little before admitting ‘you know I can’t resist those big #brown puppydog eyes…’ like i know that’s not too on the nose but it’s enough of a casual acknowledgement to Me that it feels… idk it just #feels like they Know. it just makes sense. and I hope they do cause it’d feel a little less lonely and terrifying to be gay in that world if #that were the case. yet another thing making it feel like majima’s a way more viable parent figure to him than kiryu fr fr…… #anyway I could keep going forever so I should probably stop #I’ve never considered how daigo would interact with akiyama and now they’ve got me intrigued. I really hope they update this with something #daigo #I really think a chunk of this fanbase (particularly The Queers) understand daigo as a character better than rgg studio does. and cares more

[ottiliere]

Your drawing of jthm with csa victim is beautiful thank you

thank you so much... it is a very important part of his character to me.

#lucy art #jthm #self harm #i don't think nny would engage in cutting behaviors as a form of self-harm #definitely the type to have a fit of all-encompassing volatile fervor alight upon him #leading to him smashing his head into the wall #perhaps he scratches. i cannot see biting. but maybe...he is very animalistic in his rage #when it comes to cutting. ifeel like he would do like ONE and then maybe have some kind of inner monologue and crisis on what hes doing #and then he’d never do it ever again #like the scar would stick out to him dramatically #trembling so hard as I type this up. I love nny so much #I've been listening to whiny bitch - harley poe on repeat for three days now because it reminds me of him terribly #csa mention #hospital dirk #i tag coyly #ask #(suddenly coming back to the actual ask) obviously it is not canon. but like #even when i first read it it's just something that inherently makes sense. his revulsion with ''bodily fluids'' and human touch #and aversion towards intimacy and humanity as a whole #the latter of which could easily be attributed to relentless bullying but overall i think you could make sense of his reactions to such #things as stemming from aspects of his childhood. most I don't think he'd even remember due to the nature of 777 #but as they say... the body keeps score even if the mind does not #(making leap of logic that makes no sense and obviously isn't what jhonen intended) in a way the wall is like a dissociative dissorder

[exopelagic]

honk shoo.

#but yeah sleepy. #i have so much to do these next few days I’m gonna die #meanwhile I just wanna see my friends #the good thing is that some of the busy things involve seeing my friends but goddamn why are almost all of them hard #also YES I’m going to be dumb and gay again bc a) why shouldn’t I b) nobody can stop me #I’m being dumb and gay again. #now seen The Guy twice since I’ve been back and he’s very cool #still feel like I’m being insane god idk what I’m doing #I hope he comes tomorrow bc he can’t make the meeting which means he won’t be on committee which sucks bc he did want to #OH but I did mean to tell him there was one role he could go for and have a good shot at that I think he’d be good for #only problem is if he doesn’t come tomorrow I can’t tell him in time bc I don’t have any way to message him other than email #(which feels slightly creepy bc I only know it bc secretary and he’s never explicitly said his surname so it’s just inferred from the list) #idk. the thing that gets me is we are very much friends now. like early stages of friends but we keep talking at hockey #and importantly he keeps coming To Me which keeps surprising me bc he does it more than any of my other friends #but I guess I’m also coming to him kinda a lot too. self awareness falls when around cute boy you get how it is #god it’s so unfair why is he like this #I finished getting my skates off before he did yesterday which gave me a very good opportunity to Look while he was talking #and have it not be weird and he’s just very pretty. he’s got a rlly nice nose #i always feel insane pointing out noses it’s the Draw speaking bc I use noses as a focal point and they’re fun to draw #tbh it’s unlikely I will say someone does Not have a nice nose but idk let me have this. it would be fun to draw is maybe what I mean #and I hadn’t noticed before bc the like bridge? and uhh like. base? idk nose words but they don’t match #the bridge is super long and on the thin side w a bump like mine but the like bottom is much rounder and wider and I don’t see that mix much #he also just has rlly nice hair it’s super curly and he’s in that like weird light brown purgatory where it’s all different colours #like it’s mostly light brown but some bits look rlly dark and some especially at the ends is like almost blonde and it changes w the light #god he also keeps doing this dumb fucking thing where he’s trying to skate while squatting all the way and it’s ridiculous #he looks like a spider folding in on itself and the worst part is he can fucking do it #he’s gotten so good at skating recently and I have a feeling he lives somewhere with an ice rink bc I’m sure he’s better than he was novembr #yeah I also got to just stand and watch him play yesterday and it’s so incredibly horribly unfair #anyway I’m too fucking gay and I will not let him escape me again tomorrow I Will get his instagram or smth bc I swear this man #luke.txt

[pzos-amiserableidiot]

was watching tiktok and a video had the song michael in the bathroom playing and I was vicerally reminded of being in middle and high school and mom always mentioning how much I looked like my dad (his name is michael) and how I slowly was able to start noticing it too and whenever I sang the song it reminded me of him and I felt like we were overlapping too often felt like id never be anyone but a shadow or his mirror and then i began learning i was trans and now the song makes me think of him even more (he’s not a bad dad he tells me he’s proud of me and stuff there’s just two really big moments he unknowingly failed and one long continuous one but he loves me and he’s proud and he supports me and he didn’t mean it and ive learned to make that enough) and the weird flashback I got when I heard that song and overlapping with his face and how if I transitioned I almost fear I’d be his clone and yeah Anywyas banger song

#the moments were that time he told me how he used to want something to be wrong with him and he’d cut himself to try and prove something was #and he showed me his incredibly faint scars and this was after I told them I was depressed and his solution was to tell me he faked it???? #and didn’t even see anything wrong or worrying that he’d cut himself or was self destructive or wished something was wrong so he’d have #something to blame for being the way he was and like DAD THATS DEPRESSION but I was too numb and shocked and felt so so so betrayed becuase #it felt mocking at the time like his way of comforting me. his child. was to fucking show me his scars and be like I faked it so I know #it’s real and sorry I don’t understand WTF DAD #Other time was when he gave me his phone to play Pokémon go and I betrayed his trust (he didn’t like anyone going through his phone) and #went looking through and found Grindr and saw some shirtless photos and people messaging before I left #dad had a shirtlesss photo on there. and I had to pretend everything was fine and erase the evidence and give the phone back and help look #for furniture for our new house and never tell mom cause she’s been through so much already (I really shouldn’t have known I wasn’t her #therapist but this is about daddy issues right now not the mommy ones) so anyways I never told him and years later he told me his friends #signed him up for Grindr as a prank and to make friends and that’s why he thinks someone from his work I pranking him by signing him up #for a gay furry dating site and yet I saw him on his bed sometimes messaging people and yeah #oh and the long continous one was not divorcing mom and defending her saying she loves us when she rejected me and my sister for being trans #and being gone for most of my childhood working and never understanding the fucked up dynamic of home that took place and resenting him for #ruining the perfect routine (sharp words scary feelings always wanting to cry) #anyways michael in the bathroom always gives me weird feelings #cause I hate and love my dad and I looked up to him so much and loooking like him would’ve been a dream but sometiems the wrongs he did #come back haunt my thoughts and I want to scratch and tear apart every feature that makes me look like him. I look nothing like my mom so #there’s nothing physical to tear apart (I just act like her sometimes and have to force myself not the throw up and attack myself from the #disgust)

[lionblaze03-2]

Yknow guys. I have my moments but honestly I’m really glad to be alive and get to experience this beautiful world... like the birds outside my window or my beloved beast bella (there is an animal!!! In my house!!! And she LOVES me!!!) and getting to see my best friend and watching tv and movies together and engaging with media and taking long car rides. Life is so beautiful and I’m so glad I never forget it too long. Every little thing that makes you feel joy is a reason to be on this earth, so cherish every last one, because you deserve it. You deserve to feel how beautiful the world can be. Even if it sucks dick sometimes. Sometimes everything sucks and then you see a cardinal out the window competing with another for a female and everything’s okay again. Theres joy in every day, so please go out there and feel it as hard as you can, embrace everything that makes you happy. Live. We deserve it.

#lion’s lair #me #I. Idk I’m just. Looking forward to another day of seeing my best friend #And the world. And tv. And eating food #positive #tw from this point forward in the tags #I just. #okay so as kids me and my cousin always shared a birthday. Because it’s like 6-7 days apart right and we were best friends #And I loved that. We liked the same things so it was never a problem #As we got older his parents got jealous of the fact he liked staying with our grandparents more and stopped letting him come much #So every birthday was a spectacular treat. That and thanksgiving. Because he’d be there #Then in like 2017 his mom fucking died. Suicide. And he started staying with us a lot again #I almost called him my brother opening this part of the post. Because he is. To me #Just a year older than me #But again his dad heard how much he preferred us to him and stopped letting him come around. Even on the holidays #The last day I saw him was halloween. 2018. Also the last time I saw my non-relative bestfriend at the time #And I can’t even remember if I gave him a hug goodbye. I hope I did. #He died in January the next year after his dad threatened to take away his job. His like last refuge #A lot more fucked up shit happened to him I won’t divulge but. That man made him miserable. #That man killed him. Even if he didn’t use his hands #And I miss him so much. Every day but it hurts so much around my birthday #And every year I’m so scared to age and feel so bad because I’m getting older and. He’s not #He’ll never get any older because he’s dead. Hell never see any more marvel movies or shitty b movies. Never play red dead 2 again #He doesn’t get to have those little joys in life anymore. And it makes me so fucking sad #So please please please just always remember the little joys. The birds out the window and the things and people you love #Because there’s a lot of fucking hate in this world. But there’s so much goddamn love in it too #And wonder and whimsy and things worth living for. Even when life sucks every day. There’s always something. So please stick it through #I’m so glad I’ve stuck it through. I never thought I’d make it to be an adult when I was younger let alone 20 #I miss you. #Happy birthday brother. You should be here.

[ghostbeam]

U guys I got Toji on that jjk boyfriend quiz last night and I’m having a crisis

#bf quizzes always give me yuuta or megumi😔😔😔 #this caught me so off gaurd I never would have though #me getting the boyfriend who would not be good as a boyfriend #maybe he would be good as my boyfriend tho cause he’d be like okay I’m gonna disappear for a week #and I’d be like yay okay have fun (I get alone time) #and then when he comes home we fuck nasty #ummmmm anyways #JAJAJWKSSJSJSJJS #I’m seeing the new saw movie tonight how are u guys🎤