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oathkeeperoxas · 3 months

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I watched and ranked every Tom Cruise movie so you don’t have to

Simple premise: 45 movies. One actor. Ranked from worst to best, on a sliding scale of -2 to 6 (scoring will make sense as you read).

Technical score is judged on how well the plot is constructed and how well the characters grow and serve their role in the narrative throughout the movie, as well as how well the narrative is written. Enjoyment score is judged on how much I liked the movie: no stars = didn’t like, 1 star = like, 2 star = really like. Bonus star is awarded at my discretion, for reasons such as costuming, soundtrack, particularly stand out acting, etc. Sexism modifier is a negative if women are treated badly, but can add an extra point if the movie gives women their rights. Overall score at the end determines where they sit in the rankings of this post, with movies having the same score in the order I liked them most.

Vanilla Sky (2001) – David Aames (Starring)

One sentence summary: A man’s reality begins to warp and he is forced to question what is real, and what isn’t.

Technical: -

Enjoyment: -

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥💥

Overall: 💥💥

Review: This is a bad movie. Weird acting throughout. Nonsensical plot. Terrible treatment of the women. Definitely the worst movie Tom Cruise has starred in!

Tropic Thunder (2008) – Les Grossman (Supporting)

One sentence summary: Five actors who are filming a war movie are dropped into a real war zone completely unaware, and must use their wits to escape back to their movie set.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: -

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥💥

Overall: 💥

Review: LOTS of choices made in this movie! Very few of them good! Why was RDJ in blackface? Was I supposed to find this entertaining? Was any of this necessary? Doubtful. Jack Black and Jay Baruchel had great comedic presences, and honestly the acting and casting was spot on for what the movie wanted, which is why I gave it one technical star.

Endless Love (1981) – Billy (Cameo)

One sentence summary: A teenage romance goes wrong when a boyfriend burns down his girlfriend’s house in an attempt to win the approval of her parents.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: -

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥💥

Overall: 💥

Review: They made movies differently in the 80s, I think. The plot is insane, the main characters unrelatable – or maybe I’m just too long out of high school. In any case, this was Tom Cruise’s debut film, and he did it in booty shorts while advising his friend to pretend to set his girlfriend’s house on fire, leading to him actually setting his girlfriend’s house on fire, and it was the best part of this movie. What a way to start a career.

The Mummy (2017) – Sgt. Nick Morton (Starring)

One sentence summary: After disrupting a tomb, Nick Morton (Tom Cruise) must defeat The Mummy.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: -

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥💥

Overall: 💥

Review: Yeah… there’s a reason this movie is a meme. Cruise’s acting feels weak, the plot is verging on nonsensical, and the special effects made me laugh. A rare miss in Cruise’s later years of acting!

Mission: Impossible 2 (2002) – Ethan Hunt (Starring)

One sentence summary: Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) must stop a plague by teaming up with a thief who knows the man who intends to kick off the disaster.

Technical: -

Enjoyment: -

Movie: ⭐

Sexism: 💥💥

Overall: 💥

Review: One star is discretionarily awarded because it’s set in Sydney and I recognise a lot of the locations they filmed in. Though I have no clue how Luther was getting internet connection on a sheep farm out somewhere in western NSW. Did they have satellite internet in 2002?

Eyes Wide Shut (1999) – Dr. William Harford (Starring)

One sentence summary: After his wife confesses to fantasising about cheating on him, Dr William Harford (Tom Cruise) toys with the idea of actually cheating on her, and has an insane night out in the process.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: -

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥💥

Overall: 💥

Review: Well SOMETHING happened in this movie. Hot tip, do not go into this one blind on Saturday movie night with your family in attendance. I think, personally, that Dr Hartford could have just sat down with his wife and asked her if she wanted to get into roleplay instead of doing all that. Also, did we really need to see Nicole Kidman pissing? I just really think that wasn’t necessary.

Austin Powers in Goldmember (2002) – Himself as Austin Powers (Cameo)

One sentence summary: Austin Powers must stop Dr. Evil from world domination by travelling back in time to 1975.

Technical: -

Enjoyment: -

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥

Overall: 💥

Review: This is some blend of satire and crack, and I’m not really enjoying the flavour. Tom Cruise’s cameo is pretty funny, though.

War of the Worlds (2005) – Ray Ferrier (Starring)

One sentence summary: When aliens land and start destroying Earth, Ray Ferrier (Tom Cruise) must do all he can to keep his family alive.

Technical: -

Enjoyment: -

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥

Overall: 💥

Review: Well… this exists, I guess. Some of these old sci fi novels should not be made into movies. They were not meant for the big screen. Not even Tom Cruise can save this one.

All the Right Moves (1983) – Stefen Djordjevic (Starring)

One sentence summary: After a disagreement with a teacher, Stefen (Tom Cruise) thinks that he might never get to college and never leave his hometown.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: -

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥

Overall: 💥

Review: This sure exists. Very unmemorable, even while I was watching it. Generic in music, plot, character, and romance. Anticlimactic ending too!

The Color of Money (1986) – Vincent Lauria (Starring)

One sentence summary: Vincent Lauria (Tom Cruise) tries to make money by playing pool, but is too good at it for the betting scheme his mentor attempts to set up in order to get rich.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: -

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥

Overall: 💥

Review: I will admit I found this movie fairly uninteresting, though I enjoyed Tom Cruise’s wild haircut. Nothing but respect for Vincent’s “Vince” shirt, however.

Days of Thunder (1990) – Cole Trickle (Starring)

One sentence summary: A street racer is pulled onto the Nascar track, where his attitude gets him into trouble with his team, other drivers, and the woman he’s interested in.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥💥

Overall: ⭐

Review: Two sexism bangs for Nicole Kidman’s ‘romance’ scenes (girl why did you come back to do more movies with this man). The car racing is pretty cool though. I am partial to a good car race, I must admit.

Interview with the Vampire (1994) – Lestat de Lioncourt (Supporting)

One sentence summary: A vampire sits down with a reporter to tell the story of his life: one that starts with how he was turned into the vampire, and continues to the present day.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: -

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥

Overall: ⭐

Review: Lots of stuff going on in this movie. However, mostly I agree with the well known review that spawned a thousand memes: “Not gay enough.”

The Outsiders (1983) – Steve Randle (Supporting)

One sentence summary: Two friends are caught up in the complicated politics between the “Socs” and “greasers” gangs; when one friend accidentally kills a rival, they go on the run from the police before returning home to face court, their family, and the opposing gang.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥

Overall: ⭐

Review: Patrick Swayze is kinda carrying this movie honestly. Though Tom Cruise’s denim on denim, wild accent, cake-stuffed-in-face beat ‘em up sure is a performance too. You can tell this is an old movie by how affectionate the boys were allowed to be with each other. Absolutely none of that around nowadays.

Mission: Impossible (1996) – Ethan Hunt (Starring)

One sentence summary: When his team of Impossible Mission Force agents are killed, Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) must track down the person responsible.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: 💥💥

Overall: ⭐

Review: While there are many (many, many, many) liberties taken with reality in order for this movie to be made, it is iconic for a reason. That being said, the wild subplot of Ethan’s tutor trying to set Ethan up with his wife sure was something! Bonus points for starting such an iconic franchise and, of course, the spy movie scene of dropping from the ceiling and barely not hitting the floor.

Magnolia (1999) – Frank T.J. Mackey (Supporting)

One sentence summary: I don’t know how to summarise this movie. Taking suggestions from the audience.

Technical: ⭐⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: -

Sexism: 💥💥

Overall: ⭐

Review: I don’t know how to review this movie. Was NOT expecting the frogs, that came out of left field to be sure. I think Kubrick’s vision passed me over. Anyway, two sexism bangs for having Tom Cruise invent the incel motivational speaker 😭

Born on the Fourth of July (1989) – Ron Kovic (Starring)

One sentence summary: Ron Kovic (Tom Cruise) signs up to the Army, fights in the war, and deals with the repercussions when he comes home.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: 💥

Overall: ⭐⭐

Review: This movie suffers from the same problem that all movies which are ‘true stories’ have, which is that life rarely neatly fits into a narrative structure, but it manages fairly well anyway. Bonus points given for the BTS trivia that apparently Cruise asked to be injected with some drug that would temporarily paralyse him so he could experience what it was like to improve his acting??? Cruise’s insurance company wisely refused to let him do this.

Minority Report (2002) – John Anderton (Starring)

One sentence summary: In a future where murderers are arrested before they commit their crime, Chief John Anderton (Tom Cruise) is predicted to kill a man he’s never met – and must escape his own police force in order to prove his innocence.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: 💥

Overall: ⭐⭐

Review: I had to watch this about 10 times in high school so I was hesitant to come back to it now, but it’s an okay watch when I’m not discussing its contribution to dystopian literature.

Mission: Impossible – Dead Reckoning Part One (2023) – Ethan Hunt (Starring)

One sentence summary: On the hunt for the two parts of a key which will allow him to control a new AI threat, Ethan Hunt (Tom Cruise) must sacrifice in order to save the world.

Technical: -

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: -

Sexism: ⭐

Overall: ⭐⭐

Review: Media very rarely gets plots around AI right, and this one unfortunately misses the mark. It asks no new or interesting questions about how AI is being used or will be used in our modern world, and seems to take a detour from previous Mission Impossible films in terms of tone and consistency of plot. However, Haley Atwell slaps absolute ass, and there are genuinely funny and enjoyable scenes scattered at random throughout the movie, so it definitely could be worse.

Legend (1985) – Jack (Starring)

One sentence summary: After a princess plunges her kingdom into endless winter, she must reverse the curse to save the land.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: -

Bonus: -

Sexism: ⭐

Overall: ⭐⭐

Review: A win for diversity! The princess almost ends the world, and also is allowed to save it! Special effects were pretty decent for the mid-80s, even if the plot was a bit basic. Seeing Tom Cruise go all Tarzan and also have a sword was very good, however.

Oblivion (2013) – Jack Harper (Starring)

One sentence summary: Jack Harper’s (Tom Cruise) mission in life is to protect the last of humanity – or so he thinks.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: -

Sexism: -

Overall: ⭐⭐

Review: Morgan Freeman steals the show here. I enjoyed the plot twist both at the middle and the end of the movie, and the ending scene wrapped everything up emotionally.

American Made (2017) – Barry Seal (Starring)

One sentence summary: Barry Seal (Tom Cruise) works triple time for big money while dodging the law, taking aerial photos for the CIA, smuggling cocaine into the USA for the Medellín Cartel, and delivering guns to the Nicaraguan Contras based in Honduras.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: 💥

Overall: ⭐⭐

Review: A movie that’s “based on a true story” and which does it right. The informational sections were balanced neatly with the character development and exploration of what this amount of money might do to a family.

Rock of Ages (2012) – Stacee Jaxx (Supporting)

One sentence summary: Two burgeoning singers meet at a rock bar, which needs to put on a hell of a show in order to avoid closing down.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: 💥

Overall: ⭐⭐

Review: Extra points for the killer soundtrack. Otherwise, this movie is fairly unmemorable. Tom Cruise’s hairstyle sure was a choice though!

Taps (1983) – Capt. David Shawn (Supporting)

One sentence summary: When the students of a military boarding school hear that their school is to be shut down, they stage a protest that rapidly spirals out of hand.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: 💥

Overall: ⭐⭐

Review: It’s hard to have sexism in a movie where there are literally no women, so this one is getting a default 💥. Other than the fact that women don’t exist, this was a pretty good movie, with the extra star granted for the depth of character portrayed, Tom Cruise’s buzzcut, and the acting of all the younger kids on set.

Rain Man (1988) – Charlie Babbitt (Starring)

One sentence summary: After his father dies, Charlie Babbitt (Tom Cruise) discovers he has a brother after he inherits everything in his father’s will.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: 💥

Overall: ⭐⭐

Review: I really liked how this movie showed that despite how money-hungry Charlie Babbitt originally appears, he goes through an entire journey where he realises how important family is – no matter what form that takes. To see a main male character reflect and regret on his poor relationship with his father and also express the ups and downs of other emotions throughout this movie is refreshing, and Tom Cruise does an excellent job at portraying the journey taken. While it’s obvious he prefers action movies, I actually think Cruise’s true strength is in the dramas he does.

Top Gun (1986) – Lt. Pete "Maverick" Mitchell (Starring)

One sentence summary: Pete Mitchell (Tom Cruise) attempts to prove that he’s the best Naval Aviator by winning the Top Gun trophy, and also by winning the heart of his teacher too.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: 💥💥

Overall: ⭐⭐

Review: Wow. There’s a LOT going on here. It’s impossible to discuss Top Gun without mentioning the blistering sexism that pervades this movie, but since it’s about the Navy in the 80s, no one should be surprised it’s there. However, it also manages to be one of the gayest movies of the decade. Contains multitudes! Bonus points for Val Kilmer’s amazing performance and the insane homoerotic tension that is as inextricable from this movie as the sexism is.

Valkyrie (2008) – Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg (Starring)

One sentence summary: Before D-Day, a plot to kill Hilter from within the German government unfolds.

Technical: ⭐⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: 💥

Overall: ⭐⭐⭐

Review: Full of tension and drama, this is a ‘based on a true story’ movie that’s done right (probably because liberties were no doubt taken). A different type of WWII movie, I definitely liked this one. Bonus star for the set and costuming, which were truly excellent.

Lions for Lambs (2007) – Senator Jasper Irving (Supporting)

One sentence summary: Over 90 minutes in real time, 2 marines defend a position in Afghanistan, a Senator is interviewed on a new military strategy, and a college student decides if he’s going to commit to his classes or not.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: -

Overall: ⭐⭐⭐

Review: I’m not American, and it’s not 2007 anymore, but this still hit really hard. Excellent use of the real time narrative to drive the story home deliver the message to the audience.

Cocktail (1988) – Brian Flanagan (Starring)

One sentence summary: While attending university, Brian Flanagan finds work as a bartender to pay the bills before he finds the way he’s going to get rich – and finds friendship and love along the way.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: -

Overall: ⭐⭐⭐

Review: This soundtrack slaps, it’s a cute romcom, and there are cool bartending tricks scattered throughout. It also deals with some more serious topics, but these add to the depth of character and the main relationship to bring extra flavour to the movie.

Losin' It (1983) – Woody (Starring)

One sentence summary: Four friends travel to Mexico in order to party hard and lose their virginity.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐⭐

Bonus: -

Sexism: -

Overall: ⭐⭐⭐

Review: The second half of the movie is far better than the first, with a spiralling series of events that had me laughing at every new development. Tom Cruise playing the straight laced kid was a genius decision, and I can see why he repeated this type of role a few times in future movies.

Far and Away (1992) – Joseph Donelly (Starring)

One sentence summary: Irishman Joseph Donelly (Tom Cruise) joins forces with Shannon Christie (Nicole Kidman) to cross the sea to America, where they aspire to travel to Oklahoma in order to start a new life, where land is being given away for free.

Technical: ⭐

Enjoyment: ⭐

Bonus: ⭐

Sexism: ⭐

Overall: ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Review: Very much the best of the movies that Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise collaborated on, I did enjoy this one from start to finish. The costumes are great, but the bonus points go to how bloody and beat up Tom Cruise consistently is in this movie. Yes, go and get back into that fighting ring again. It’s good for my health.

(continued in the next reblog because tumblr will only let me add 30 images per post)

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becky5203 · 1 year

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Okay so maybe it’s just cause I’ve been watching a lot of How To Train Your Dragon stuff lately so I’m feeling extra passionate about it right now but I feel like Hiccup is just such a top tier character in fiction. Not just in Dreamworks, not just in animation, but in fiction. Period. He’s so dynamic and his struggles and triumphs just feel so real and relatable. There’s a lot about Hiccup that could come off as cliché or overdone but it doesn’t. I can’t quite put everything I want to say about him into words but what I can say is that he’s an excellent protagonist and it’s only further exemplified by the terrific work of his voice actor, Jay Baruchel. Seeing him change and grow throughout all the shows, specials, and movies from that scrawny village outcast to the cheif of Berk is a magical experience that cannot be captured properly in whatever live action cash grab they’re apparently planning right now. Hopefully it gets shelved soon and then thrown out altogether.

#hiccup horrendous haddock lll #hiccup haddock #httyd #how to train your dragon

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reviewinghiccup · 1 year

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DEFENDERS OF BERK | HTTYD SERIES | BREAKING DOWN HICCUP

Blog Post Series: Breaking Down Hiccup

Title: The Night and the Fury

Ep/Season: Episode 3, Season 2 (Defenders of Berk)

Premise:

Hiccup and gang set out on a training exercise on Dragon Island in hopes to train their stealth / combat skills without help from their dragons. Unfortunately, they run into a very, very unlikely "friend"...

IN ASTRID WE TRUST

It's no secret that the team needs some polishing. And we're hoping, Astrid's obstacles could do the trick. I love how they groaned, knowing that her tests is going to be difficult. It's very like them to do that and very like her to make things tough.

This exercise is fertile ground for individual members of the team to grow. For example:

(1) TUFFNUT TAKES ON THE RESPONSIBILITY OF WATCHING THE DRAGONS

(2) RUFFNUT GOES OUT ON HER OWN

(3) FISHLEGS, WELL, IT'S JUST ANOTHER DAY FOR HIM REALLY. I.E., DOING SOMETHING HE'S SCARED TO DO

(4) HICCUP, DEALING W DAGUR

(Can we also take a moment to appreciate the little confidence boost Hiccup gives to Fishlegs? We can? Ok. Here you go.)

If you started watching RTTE without first seeing ROB/DOB, you might wonder why Dagur calls him brother. Well, to be fair, I still don't know why he does, but at least from this episode, you'll know when the supposed familial relationship began.

P/S: Look at how small & cute baby is.

It's also really cute that Hiccup tries, for the most part, to keep the peace with Dagur, though for the most part, I hate to watch them pandering to him.

THE DAGUR FIASCO

This episode is where I feel DOB kicks off. Hiccup's in a very precarious position. The last time Dagur showed up, Stoick lied that Berk was still at war w dragons and that they still killed them. For the sake of peace, Hiccup didn't have much of a choice but to play along and reassert the lie.

This episode is definitely one of my favourites, especially in terms of the Hiccup-Dagur dialogue.

It's hard to not enjoy the "bro-mance" sequences. Just look at this one:

In fact, if you only watched RTTE, you might've missed where the Dagur v Snotlout situation also began. And it might surprise you to realise, that Snotlout was very much, a fan of Monsieur Deranged here.

HICCUP'S STAND

But nothing beats, that moment when Hiccup takes his stand.

It was such a DEFINING MOMENT, because Dagur has been looking down on Hiccup for years and NOW, NOW?! He realises what a genuine threat Hiccup could be. And more importantly, how easily his pride is wounded.

I'm all here for HEROIC HICCUP. And what an artistic way to show how much Dagur underestimated him. He even underestimate his shield! Much to his lost...

Also, don't you think that it is very Captain America of Hiccup sometimes, when he's wielding the shield?

And let's not forget, Hiccup is one sassy protagonist. I mean, you know you're an enemy when he burns you.

This episode is way more significant than I realised it at first. This whole time, Alvin was Berk's only viable threat. But his beef was with Stoick, initially at least.

But now, Dagur is another. And the person he's going after is Hiccup. Dagur is Hiccup's first archenemy.

And it doesn't help that he's insane.

So, what I loved about this episode was, it heightened the stakes of the entire show AND also, showcased how Hiccup can out-wit, out-smart and challenge Dagur, who I think, must've been a pretty tough contender to command the massive armada he ends up leading.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY JAY BARUCHEL (9.4.2023)

I know this may come off super random, but it is Jay Baruchel's birthday today. I think we can all agree that Jay is the life and soul of Hiccup. If you follow me on twitter @reviewinghiccup, you should know that I am down the rabbit hole of Jay Baruchel movies, interviews and podcasts.

And what I love so much about this guy is the respect and reverence he has for the show. I mean, he constantly praises it and not just because of his role, which he believes pales in comparison to the artists designing and working the animation, but its obvious that he's a HTTYD superfan.

I love it when an actor pays their respects to the franchise and I do enjoy his take on the work and how much the line between who Hiccup is and who he is, as a person, is blurred.

He's an eloquent speaker and tries to produce, write and direct movies now, instead of act in them. He's based in Canada.

Anyways, something interesting I learned about him was, in an interview w Tom Power, he talks about the book he wrote and what being a fan means to him. Him being a fan of hockey and how precious it can be to live within a franchise or something as massive as indulging interests. It sorta validates me a little, specially since I've dived deep into HTTYD fandom since changing careers.

youtube

And just like Hiccup, there is way more to this guy than it seems. He's funny, humble, kind and generous with his time. He wears his heart on his sleeve, and he's pretty jittery in real life too. But what kind of broke me, was finding out that even with his own father, he felt like he wasn't the kind of son his dad wanted.

Apparently, he had a complicated relationship with his dad which I believe may have bled into his work.

If you've watched enough of his interviews you'll know that he's had to support his mom and sister at 14-years-old with acting gigs because his father left and passed away when Jay was 21 following a drug overdose. Yet, he still remains so kind. I mean, his upbringing was tough, poor and difficult, yet you can still see him trudging through humbly, not wanting to draw attention to himself as much as he can help it.

In an interview article I read this morning, he explained that he wanted to continue being a good husband, son, brother, friend and I thought that was such a genuine Hiccup thing to say. He shoulders all these responsibilities and have been since he was a kid. Look, I don't know the guy personally, but from the expansive notes and recordings I've looked into, he seems pretty decent and I am such a huge fan.

As I grow older, I understand people on a different level. I accord respect so differently from how I would've years ago. And right now, I think what makes Jay Baruchel interesting is his sheer promise to do better for his family. And I think, in the absence of chiefing, running a village and saving the world, Hiccup is very much the same in that aspect too. A chief protects his own, which seems to be the mantra ringing in my head as I listen to Jay talk about his life.

You guys have no idea how much I know about this dude. I have possibly stalked him silly right now. And am a little embarrass as I admit this. Anyways, all I want is for him to succeed, in his work, life and family.

#HTTYD #DOB #Defenders of Berk #Series Review #How to Train Your Dragon #Breaking Down Hiccup #Dagur the Deranged #captain america #chris evans #happy birthday #jay baruchel #she's out of my league #alice eve #Youtube #hiccup #hiccup haddock #hiccup horrendous haddock iii

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writeouswriter · 8 months

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Everyone sleeping on how attractive Jay Baruchel is but 2010 me watching The Sorcerer’s Apprentice knew what was up, rewatched it the other day and now he’s got me acting unwise*

*watching random Canadian films with less than 100 user reviews on them just to see him

Enjoy the blurriest phone screenshots ever as I reveal myself to be the girl from that one post that goes something like “girls are always like omg look at him he’s soooo hot and then you look at the guy and he looks like x* meme.

#sorry for jay Baruchel posting #no one else is doing it #jay baruchel #the art of the steal was actually pretty fun #real time was okay not great #I looked him up again because blackberry was f*cking amazing though I watched that for the other actor not jay #but anyway!#on the topic of Canadian movies (as a Canadian myself): they’re often bad! 😭#but art of the steal was a pleasantly not terrible surprise #ignore me!#I think jay Baruchel is sooo hot okay

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evilwriter37 · 4 months

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Ok. We all know well how much Viggo calls Hiccup "mu dear Hiccup". It sounds condescending or tesing at best most of the time (except that one time he was found in a pit)

Now, have you noticed that this is no longer the case in Triple Cross? "Oh, Hiccup, you have many admirable qualities[...]" "Don't be like that, Hiccup!" "You taught me that, Hiccup' "Hiccup, you are more ruthless than you realize." Not a single one of "my dear"s. I have a feeling this is a sign he finally was brave enough to admit to himself (and others) that he truly respects that kid and that he cares. No more taunts. No more mockery. This boy is not inferior and now he earnestly begins to treat him as such at long last. This character progression makes me squirm in glee and heartache

Oh, dude (sorry that I call like, all my anons “dude”), you’re so right. I never actually thought about it like that, but now that you’re bringing it to my attention? Oh, delicious. Some very fine cuisine the RTTE writers and Alfred Molina gave us right here.

Oh god. Oh god, now I’m just thinking of Horvath (Alfred Molina) calling Dave (Jay Baruchel) “sweetheart” in The Sorcerer’s Apprentice. It has the same kind of energy.

But yeah, oooh, Viggo’s character development in seasons 5 and 6 was so good. Actually, all his character development was so good. He was so well written and well done.

#asks #httyd #viggo grimborn #alfred molina

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joeygoeshollywood · 4 months

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My 25 Favorite Films of 2023

It's that time of year again! Here are my top 25 films of 2023.

25. Joy Ride

Following in the footsteps of Bridesmaids and Girls Trip, Joy Ride offers some of the biggest laughs of 2023 proving once again women can be just as raunchy as men. The cast includes up-and-comers Ashley Park, Oscar nominee Stephanie Hsu, and a scene-stealing breakthrough performance from Sherry Cola. Joy Ride marks a strong debut from writer-director Adele Lim.

24. Theater Camp

Anyone who had aspirations of becoming an actor can relate to Theater Camp, a mockumentary about the staff of a theater camp struggling to keep it afloat. Molly Gordon, Ben Platt, and Noah Galvin lead both behind and in front of the camera in this superb comedy that will leave you singing from the rooftops.

23. A Thousand and One

A Thousand and One is a heartbreaking indie film about a mother's desperate effort to form a bond with her estranged son by kidnapping him from the foster care system following her stint in prison. Teyana Taylor packs an emotional punch with her crushing performance with the help of A.V. Rockwell in her feature debut as a writer-director.

22. Thanksgiving

Eli Roth's filmography in horror is a mixed record, but his latest flick Thanksgiving may be his best work yet. Not only is it a solid slasher with great over-the-top killings, its brilliantly hilarious. In a time where horror franchises can be tiresome, Thanksgiving is one that could call for a second or third helping.

21. Somewhere in Queens

TV icon Ray Romano makes his feature directorial debut in the family comedy Somewhere in Queens. He stars as the father of a promising high school basketball player who goes through perhaps desperate means to assure he lands a college scholarship. Joined by the wonderful Laurie Metcalf, Somewhere in Queens has plenty of laughs as well as plenty of heart.

20. Dream Scenario

The remarkable comeback of Nicolas Cage continues with his brilliant performance in Dream Scenario, a dark fantasy horror comedy in which he plays a college professor who inexplicably starts appearing in everyone's dreams, sparking a national phenomenon that will ultimately take a personal toll. Cage balances the absurdity of the situation his character is in with emotional heft that comes with it. This marks Norwegian filmmaker Kristoffer Borgli's first English-language film and based on how well-executed Dream Scenario is, hopefully it won't be his last.

19. The Covenant

Guy Ritchie's latest The Covenant is a heart-pounding war film based on the true story of Sgt. John Kinley's rescue effort of his Afghan interpreter Ahmed. Jake Gyllenhaal and Dar Salim make a perfect duo in this dramatic, suspenseful film that may be Ritchie's strongest work to date.

18. Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret.

Judy Blume's 1970 adolescent classic Are You There God? It’s Me, Margaret. finally made its way to the big screen this year in the heartwarming coming-of-age tale of a girl's awkward journey from childhood to adulthood as well as the complexities that come from being an interfaith household. Abby Ryder Fortson shines as the titular Margaret in an outstanding performance not often seen from child actors. Also, we need more Rachel McAdams.

17. BlackBerry

Arguably the biggest surprise of 2023, BlackBerry offers some of the best laughs in the comedic retelling of the rise and fall of the iconic BlackBerry device. BlackBerry is a showcase of talent of its star Jay Baruchel, Matt Johnson (who also directed and co-wrote the film), and Glenn Howerton of It's Always Sunny fame, easily giving one of the best on-screen performances of the entire year.

16. You Hurt My Feelings

Writer-director Nicole Holofcener reunites with her Enough Said star Julia Louis-Dreyfus with You Hurt My Feelings, which centers a turbulent chapter in a couple's marriage after a novelist overhears her husband mocking her latest book. The dramedy examines the thought-provoking nuances of how fully honest one actually should be with their spouse (the answer may surprise you!). The greatest strength from Holofcener's latest is how its humor comes naturally from the reality of relationships.

15. Mission: Impossible - Dead Reckoning Part One

Mission: Impossible does the unthinkable in Hollywood: keeping a franchise in top-notch shape. Dead Reckoning Part One, the whopping *seventh* installment of the Ethan Hunt saga, delivers on a compelling plot and incredible action sequences, all of which is cemented by the star power of Tom Cruise, who has carried this spy franchise for nearly 20 years. There have been hints that Dead Reckoning may be the beginning of the end for Mission: Impossible, and if that's the case, it's going out with a bang.

14. Talk to Me

The best horror movie of 2023, Talk to Me is a chilling film about a group of teenager's ill-fated decision of doing a viral challenge of interacting with the dead, only to mistakenly leave the portal open between the living and the spirit world. What makes Talk to Me work is the family drama at the core of the film and the powerful performance from its troubled heroine Sophie Wilde.

13. Sisu

Inglorious Basterds meets Mad Max: Fury Road meets John Wick, Sisu is a WWII-era revenge action flick about a gold prospector's quest to retrieve the gold that was stolen from him from a group of Nazis. Full of brutal, bloody fight sequences with a twisted sense of humor, Sisu is one helluva ride.

12. Creed III

Creed III is a throwback to the era where Hollywood blockbusters were able to provide complete satisfaction. The latest installment of the Rocky spin-off franchise marked the strong directorial debut of its star Michael B. Jordan and also may have sadly marked the final film of the incredibly talented Jonathan Majors, whose recent assault conviction may be a knockout punch to an otherwise booming career.

11. May December

Often having vibes of a soap opera, Todd Haynes' May December is a compelling and at times disturbing film of an actress (played by Natalie Portman) who shadows the woman she's depicting in a film (played by Julianne Moore) famous for her 90s love affair with a then 13-year-old, who later became her husband. Despite the powerhouse performances from the two Oscar winners, the film really belongs to rising star Charles Melton, whose character finally comes to grips with the trauma he unknowingly endured as a child. And Melton's performance is among 2023's best.

10. Anatomy of a Fall

We don't often get great courtroom dramatic thrillers these days which is why Anatomy of a Fall really stands out. German actress Sandra Hüller gives a breakthrough performance as a wife and mother who becomes the prime suspect in what authorities believe is the murder of her husband, who had fallen to his death from the attic window. With plenty of twists and turns, Anatomy of a Fall will keep viewers guessing throughout.

9. Maestro

Not only does Bradley Cooper give the performance of his career, he has also shown his ability to direct is no fluke. Maestro, a biopic that spotlights the personal drama of legendary composer Leonard Bernstein, is a beautifully-shot, well-acted film that solidifies Cooper as one of Hollywood's newest talented filmmakers.

8. Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse

One would assume that a Spider-Man cartoon would solely be geared towards children but Spider-Man: Across the Spider-Verse is such a sophisticated film between its complex plot and the remarkable animation that are a continuation from its 2018 Into the Spider-Verse predecessor. Between a strong voice cast, an amazing score and a brilliant cliffhanger, Across the Spider-Verse was the shining gem of the many superhero duds 2023 had to offer.

7. Killers of the Flower Moon

At 81-years-old, legendary director Martin Scorsese hasn't lost his step with Killers of the Flower Moon, his best film in at least a decade. The crime drama is based on a true story on the 1920s murders of members of Osage Nation and its ties to the marriage Ernest Burkhart and Mollie Kyle, played by the reliably gifted Leonardo DiCaprio and powerful newcomer Lily Gladstone.

6. Saltburn

Following her strong debut with 2020's Promising Young Woman, filmmaker Emerald Fennell makes a valiant return with her twisted comedic psychological drama Saltburn, which surrounds an Oxford student who is quickly embraced by the wealthy family of a classmate and the jarring fallout as a result. Barry Keoghan (The Banshees of Irisherin, Dunkirk) proves he's more than capable of being the leading man and is joined by rich ensemble including Rosamund Pike, Jacob Elordi, Richard E. Grant and Carey Mulligan. With stunning visuals and some of the most shocking things you'll see onscreen in 2023, Saltburn is a stirring work of art.

5. The Holdovers

It's been a long time since a new Christmas movie can live up to beloved holiday classics and Alexander Payne makes the closest effort with The Holdovers, a 1970-set dramedy about a miserable teacher at a boys academy who is stuck essentially babysitting the "holdover" students who didn't go home for the holidays. Joining the always-brilliant Paul Giamatti is newcomer Dominic Sessa as his troublesome student and Da'Vine Joy Randolph, who gives a powerful Oscar-worthy performance as the cook mourning over the loss of her son. The Holdovers is the perfect film to warm your heart over the holidays this year and every year going forward.

4. Past Lives

Perhaps one of the more unsung heroes of 2023 cinema, Past Lives is a touching story about love and what if. Greta Lee stars in a breakout role as a married woman who rekindles a relationship with a childhood friend from South Korea but rather than going down the typical "will they, won't they" or "love triangle" paths this film easily could've taken, Past Lives delves into the emotional complexities with such tenderness that only writer/director Celine Song could've told (the film is semi-autobiographical).

3. Oppenheimer

If anyone knows how to make a biopic an epic, it's Christopher Nolan. Oppenheimer is essentially two films rolled into one- a tick-tock thriller about the creation of the atomic bomb as well as a political drama that J. Robert Oppenheimer endured. Cillian Murphy gives the performance of his career and leads a gigantic ensemble cast in a film that despite its 3-hour running time goes by fast. And while Barbie may have won the box office battle, Oppenheimer certain won the war in more ways than one.

2. Polite Society

Polite Society is a brilliant action comedy following an aspiring stuntwoman who believes her sister is marrying into a sinister family. In the style of a Tarantino movie, up-and-coming filmmaker Nida Manzoor makes a strong feature debut that is the epitome of a fun popcorn movie, which have been in short supply in recent years.

Poor Things

Yorgos Lanthimos has quickly risen as of the strongest filmmakers of this generation, proving so once again with his latest film Poor Things. Emma Stone gives an Oscar-worthy performance as a woman brought back to life who embarks on a journey of self-discovery and autonomy and is accompanied by an excellent supporting cast. Like a modern-day Tim Burton, Lanthimos was able to create a mesmerizing universe with incredible production design, a whimsical music score, and stunning cinematography. Going to the movies is meant to be an escape, and Poor Things perfectly encapsulates that.

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