#i dont see things when i close my eyes

[itscoah]

me, last year: i wonder what's it like to be an artist with aphantasia

me, has aphantasia

#im booboo #i spent 2 hours going in depth trying to figure out what it meant to 'see' images in your minds eye #personal #aphantasia #i can envision flash images but #i dont see things when i close my eyes #i didnt know people can see things so vividly when they close their eyes #i feel so robbed #why isnt aphantasia viewed as a word #get rid of that red squiggly underline thanks

[allforthe-gay]

it is completely one hundred percent baffling to me that any of the foxes would come away from witnessing neil and andrew's reunion in baltimore with the opinion that their relationship was just hate fucking . like my brother in christ are you blind

#andrew was FERAL . #he fucking choked KEVIN like COME ON #and he was like RACING into the room to see neil and #he was all like *tugs neil's hoodie to get his attention* *threatens anyone who tried to come close to them (abby)* #he was all like 'i dont trust them to give you back.' come on man . #and neil was looking at andrew . most definitely Like That. when he was talking to abby #neil was all battered and bruised from barely dodging a fucking death sentence and he sees andrews partly red eye and thats #the first thing he talks about #*lightly taps a thumb against the bruise at andrews eye* i didnt know theyd staged a riot #they were all like Looking at each other and ..... idk i am not explaining this well enough but . #you don't need me to. you all read it #it was So Fucking Obvious my god #im crying bc even neil thought nicky wasnt far from the truth at that point #like he could not have been more incorrect istg . #aftg #andreil #neil josten #andrew minyard #all for the game #mi ne

[liquidstar]

ok alien stage fans dont hate me for what im about to say im just throwing the IDEA out there okay. but just listen

you know how we have these two promo images of ivan and till?

("observation" and "decision" by vivinos)

paralleling their young selves and their current selves. young ivan sits with till and happily watches him sing, older ivan stares more seriously at till as they're about to enter the contest, having just made some sort of decision (we don't know what exactly that means yet. to lose? to not compete? to tie? to... win? given his convo with sua that might be the "nicer" option in his mind)

and now the promo art for round 6 dropped, "cure"

its OBVIOUSLY playing on paralleling these shots again. this time it seems to be after till got punished and is asleep or unconscious (or maybe he just has his eyes closed, but i dont think hes awake- he's not the type to be so chill about the face touching)

what if... its also meant to parallel a "future" shot? just like the previous two?

if till ends up dying this round (SAD!) we could end up seeing the second half of it. with ivan's hand on till's corpse. but this is pure conjecture, not super likely. im just saying is all.

#one of the things that made me think this is that ''cure'' isnt a perfect parallel the way the other two are of each other #mostly in the way till is posed with his hair falling back and eyes and mouth closed #in the other two it seems a point to have all these aspects the same in both versions of him (ivan is the one whose expression change tho) #but its still CLEARLY playing off the same concept. so maybe it also has a ''twin''.... #if it does happen ill put my head through a wall though for putting the possibility out there #but i dont think its likely its just a concept i thought of when i saw the art and thought of the other art lol #is IS called cure though. maybe till does die but is resuscitated somehow who knows #aliens probably have good medical tech that hyuna stole #also ''cure'' has the red show in ivan's eye while the others dont. inch resting. #i love when the red shows you can really see the ''camera'' inspo lol #alien stage

[cloud-ya]

My feelings about elysia are so conflicting because like she is the reason i started accepting that im queer so she has a special place in my heart but her bad writing and touchy-ness is pretty off putting to me and god i hate having complex feelings *explodes *

ouhg big struggle I see

#nothing close to like or dislike situation for me here tho heres this thing that sometimes i dont hate her so strongly #im not obsessed with hating her 24/7 sometimes its more like i dont give a fuck about her but still roll my eyes when i see her #so sometimes i dont really vibe with strong hate talk. if you get what i mean #chronic apathy 👍 #cloud has been asked #elysia hate

[sophiethewitch1]

I'm such a die hard Clark x Lois shipper. Like girl x superhuman completely head over heels for her PLUS guy who wears glasses??? Made for me

#sophie speaks #i cant tell you qhat makes me like a ship vs dislike it vs self insert #i think its just thqt i dont have a thing for older men #still hqve to close my eyes when i see aizawa x reader #he feels like my weird gay uncle im sorry gang #to ME that is #always support self shippers always

[u3pxx]

so apparently i have aphantasia

#sunnysiderambles #YOU GUYS WERE SEEING THINGS IN YOUR BRAIN AND NO ONE TOLD ME !!!!?!?!????!!!! #like i can visualize things but i dont . really see anything when i close my eyes #its just an idea of where lines go if i want to draw something #but theres just nothing there #anyways #just had a crisis lol #reblobbed

[jamesunderwater]

Tarot question, the high priestess!

The high priestess: what is your dream date?

Well, since it didn't say it had to be a first date I'm gonna say this would be with someone I've come to feel safe with but I'm still getting to know: we have a whole day set aside, and with a parameter of going at most maybe 2 hrs outside our city, we each pick a place that represents something abt the core of who we are. So I take them to the closest biggest body of water and tell them about growing up in Florida and how the ocean knows me in ways humans never can. Maybe they take me to a random town they've never been to before and we go antiquing bc they like seeing new places rather than old, and antiquing is what they did with their grandma growing up. Or, idk, they have us hike to the highest point within the radius and tell me how they like hikes with a challenge because when their legs burn and their heart rate increases they feel wild, like they belong there in the forest. And while we're driving we both play songs for each other that have meant something to us in our lives, taking turns, telling stories, their song reminds me of one from when I was 9 that I forgot existed, they haven't listened to this genre in ages and start remembering all the songs they used to love. When we get back to our city we get ice cream. I go home buzzing and dance around my apartment with my cats to one of the songs they shared.

#i thought deeply about this and cant tell you how perfect it sounds #maybe doing all that in one day would be a lot but the adventure of it is half the fun #we're on the way to my spot and i see a waffle house and im like. wait. detour. my mom thinks WH is the best restaurant in the u.s. #we get bad coffee and waffles and then when we're going to their spot we pass a sign for the town where weiner cars were started (idk) #and theyre like fuck we were gonna go hiking but i was obsessed w weiner cars as a kid. i dressed up as one for halloween when i was 7. #so we go nd take pictures w the OG weiner car and then they drive us around until we find an abandoned building w vines in the windows #and we sneak in and they tell me how they always wanted to be a ghost hunter and still kinda do so we try to hunt ghosts w/o getting tetanus #and so the day could go way off plan and it'd still be on plan #(we hold hands in the abandoned place but wont admit we were creeped out until we get back to the car) #(we take our shoes off and stand w our feet in the water and our shoulders touching and i say close your eyes nd breathe deep 3 times #and tell me what the water tells you) #(and they dont hesitate or look at me skeptically. the water tells them beautiful things its never told me.) #Charlie mail #me #anna tag

[modernmutiny]

Y'all really know I was raised by witches when I think to myself "why am I feeling so Much lately? Oh duh it's samhain" 🤦🏻‍♂️

#teddy talks #personal #my grief is uh. close #like the box/button metaphor that button is big as hell recently #but yeah duh its samhain grief is gonna get Real Close #its 3am on nov 1 so i feel like. if grief were ice and im saltwater #slushy and surrounded and wading through #not in a bad way! im remembering things i thought i forgot and i treasure those memories dont get me wrong #ok less like ice and more like....lava slowly turning to magma? #idk my metaphors are escaping me #but to put it in terms my mom would use: the ghosts are rising like the tide around me #which makes me seem a little crazy but ive always had a....thing with ghosts #and ive tried to forget that and put it behind me but thats not exactly working :/ #so of youre of that mind - the ghosts are really pressing close lately like they know i can feel it #and i feel like it like when your sibling puts their finger half an inch away from you like 'im not touching you' but. you Feel It #its hard to explain #like remembering a physical sensation almost #like seeing something out of the corner of your eye #anyway if you want to hear my stories about ghosts and shit lmk but thats less the point #the point is my world is Weird rn and im trying to reconcile and pay respect and all that jazz #its candle + meditation time

[piplupod]

(can i please get a waffle voice): can i PLEASE having a coping mechanism that doesnt turn maladaptive. can i PLEAAASE have just one !!! i am Begging you, on my hands and knees !!!!! AUGH

#tfw your coping mechanism detaches you from reality and now you're watching yourself warily to make sure u dont fall into That Pit again #skirting around the edge and unhooking my claws from the coping mechanism and holding it gingerly with the tips of my fingers #praying i do not have to put it down entirely. because man..... its slim pickings around here for shit that actually Works fhfjdkl #the issue with reality being nigh unbearable ... is that you cannot bear reality. and thus detach. but u cannot go too far away from it. #or else Bad Shit happens. that i don't especially want to experience again fhdjdkdl #it'd be so cool to have a brain that didnt do this. so i could just freely la-dee-da along with fun things #instead of the fun things turning Bad bc they went too far fjfkdl #or having to keep a very close eye on myself when i get into new things bc i can see they have the potential to go badly for Me w my brain #sobbing forever honestly. i feel awful. this sucks shit. im trying to be funny about it to cope but im Upset fjfjddkl #im so sick of this type of thing fjdkdl I wish i could just like... be okay. for a while. without it going badly like this fjfkfl #i thought maybe i was on the up finally but nooooo it's just bc i was getting too far from holding onto reality properly #god i hate this pattern. im so fucking angry w it tbh fjfkfl i cannot believe i let myself think this was going to be different fjfkfl #but anyways!! onwards we march and hopefully i figure smth out fjfkdl im uhhhh very tired #going to crawl into bed at the ripe time of 8:30pm and just go listen to music and draw or smth idk fjfkfl this is frustrating #pippen needs 2nd breakfast

[absentmoon]

hi courier its me saint i cant help but notice what you rbd hmmmm....kisses from every small task hmmm sounds like a mission for the bennster for sure

hi saint its me courier! why dont you explode. i can help 💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥

#I DONT WANT TO THINK ABOUT THAT!!!!!!!!!!! EXPLODE FOREVER💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥💥 #i have better things to do than getting INTERRUPTED all the time 😑😑😑😑 closing my eyes. i do not see it. #i think it suits you better tbh. Ramattrakiss in the middle of repairs after every little step. him humming in satisfaction when youre done #🤨🏳️‍🌈 #daisy.txt #moot tag #saint/halliday #🎰.benny #mme smiling when i get a friend ask vs THE HATE IN MY HEART 👿👿👿👿👿👿

[arthur-r]

need to poll my friends, does anybody drink black coffee like just coffee from inside of a coffee pot and you don’t put anything in it?

#haven’t tried black coffee since i was like ten and i hated it then and now i have mixed feelings #the biggest problem was that it is way too warm i am all burnt up now #that’s what milk is for really is just to drown out the heat turn it into a regular temperature beverage #anyway it tastes well enough and i guess the point of black coffee is it gets the job done #that being said caffeine usually makes me feel unwell so don’t ask me why i went for it today #pro tip if you don’t want to aggravate somebody’s heart problems don’t pour coffee near them when they’re sleeping #(‘‘sleeping’’ what i mean is eyes closed head on desk still perceiving things. not strong enough to wake me up from a dream or anything) #anyway if you pour coffee near me and i’m currently tired out of my mind i’m gonna ask to have some there’s no way around it #so um not my fault i was aided and abetted and i play no role in my own destruction #anyway i’m also feeling entirely fine shdhdf i’m nearly convinced it’s been a chocolate allergy this whole time #and if i stop drinking mochas then i’ll stop reacting cause it’s not the caffeine that’s the problem. we’ll find out soon #anyway who drinks this. do my friends drink this?? do my friends have tips on how to drink this #for example how do you make it not be warm but also not be filled up with milk #do you just blow on it. like an old man in a fable about a satyr who thinks humans are the strangest creatures #the taste is kind of epic honestly like it’s not good but it’s kind of good #at the very least it makes me feel like an old academic #anyway hi it’s senior skip day and i’m playing the system by showing up at the school building and skipping from here #shdhdf i’m gonna go to class from here on out though. just had to skip physics cause i never did the essay and i’m afraid of confrontation #that’s also not my fault because who assigns an essay in physics class???? i dont know this stuff well enough to write about it?? #although of course that’s the point of assigning an essay is to see if we know everything well enough to write about it shdhdf #so anyway i’m here to ask my friends who drink black coffee (if there are any) what do you do to help it cross the line to just being good? #cause right now it’s like good in several ways but it’s too warm and it tastes a little bit silly. i need pro tips for college #cause honestly i love the taste of coffee and like i said the chocolate might be the problem so i’m turning away from mochas #probably they’re both a problem. but let’s say i start drinking decaf black coffee. what do i do to make it incredible. please and thanks #shdhdf mostly i’m just checking in though. how is everybody? i really hope you are doing well!!!! #i’ll be around for a bit then heading to humanities class eventually i can’t skip on the teacher who invited me to her book club #also like. lunch. and like i said i have integrity now. gonna go to the rest of my classes #but so anyway i hope everybody is doing well!!!! let me know if you need anything!! listen to corrections by poolboy if you feel like it!! #me. my post. mine. #alright this is my last tag but i’ll be around. hope you are well and let me know!!

[gandreida]

Man. It is rough being the only queer person in my family. I would like a relationship with these people, but they’re a bunch of cishets and getting close to one of them reminds me of why i distanced myself in the first place.

#mourning my cousin and mourning the relationship i never had with her because ive been so distant #trying to form a relationship with other survivng cousins and feeling their cishet eyes upon me #to have a relationship with these people is to be on the defensive so as to protect myself #to have a relationship with them is to prepare myself to be ignored if I try to explain queer struggles #to have those struggles played down #cishet white folks who subscribe to the predominant gender binary and can willingly ignore the rise of fascism #the cousin who reaches out the most couldn’t stop saying that our cousin’s death affects her more than most because they were close #spoke almost exclusively about herself during her speech at our cousin’s memorial #during the memorial in general I felt like i was in a dream #genuinely felt out of touch with reality #i kept expecting her to walk through the door #i saw her face several times in the people that were there #she took her own life and I can’t even ask why #depression is so deceptive. when I’m depressed I tend to act happier just so folks dont catch on and I can see now that she ws doing the sam #hearing people talk about her had me feeling like I was being described #so many of the things she valued & did for others & just liked to do in general are things I heavily relate to #she may be gone but I feel her with me in that way. #im tired and i need a hug

[gatual]

here's ur daily reminder to send ppl who comment on others ppls weight to shut the fuck up<3

#and mainly if u see hear sb saying some bitchy ignorant comments to a fat person.. SHUT THE FUCK UP #djfbbjfks its so sickening tody i had am argument w sb bc of this and like even when im telling y why is it so hard to understand #whats the reasoning ur not making bc i swear its not that hard 'its nOt so haRd to loSe wEiGht juSt clOse ur moUth well why dont U CLOSE #UR MOUTH IF ITS NOT SO HARD UGHGHUH #seeing the uncomfort in my brothers eyes when my grandma asks him is hes gained weight again or the pain in my moms eyes #when dad comments abt her weight is so HHHHHHHHHHHH #and i feel like many times comments maybe arent ill intentioned mainly when they come from loved ones but u gotta make ppl see #THAT THEY SHOULD SHUT THE FUCK UP. A #i rather choose kind and logic ways to tell them bc idt theyre trying to b mean but if u see sb actively being mean . smack #we gotta stand up for eachother rmr that🧐 #🍒 #most times they wont understand but its better to defend someone than just look #and this could also apply to more things than just weight if ur in a conversation and sb says smth fucked up call them out😭