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magicaltear · 3 months

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Thanks for the tag @ailendolin! ♡ I'm sorry I'm doing this almost two months later, but better late than never!

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

19 as of January 2024. I guess I'm a very slow writer, but I'm quite happy with my fics so far ♡

2. What’s your total AO3 word count?

193,393. Huh. Sadly, less than I'd hope for.

3. What fandoms do you write for?

I've only ever written for 1917 and Marvel. I've been toying with some fic ideas for Star Wars, but nothing concrete yet.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

1. An Outside Chance (1,359 kudos - Marvel MCU)

2. In Every Universe (715 kudos - Marvel MCU)

3. I'm Better When I'm Dancing (161 kudos - Marvel MCU)

4. As Long As We Both Shall Live (74 kudos - 1917 film)

5. Echoes of Grief (57 kudos - Digimon Adventure: Last Evolution Kizuna)

5. Do you respond to comments?

Yes! To every single one of them. It might take me a while, but I very much enjoy doing it. The fun thing about posting fanfic online is getting to hear people's thoughts and reactions. I'll always be grateful to all of my readers who take a moment to leave a comment on my chapters and stories ♡

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

That would probably be A Million Is Only a Statistic because of the Major Character Death tag. The story follows Colonel Mackenzie and Major Hepburn from the 1917 film, who sadly do not have a happy ending in the fic.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I mainly try to write Happy Endings because it is what I enjoy the most, so most of my fics are fairly feel-good stories. Maybe...Peace On Earth (Will Come To Stay) because I could have gone for a sadder ending in so many scenes, but I stubbornly stuck to the Everyone Lives happy ending I wanted for the 1917 characters.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Thankfully, I don't! ♡ My readers are all absolutely amazing and very supportive. If anything, they might express their dislike for some characters in the fandom, but they never spew hate toward them or my writing. I appreciate them all so much ♡

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I haven't posted any, no, but I have started to practice that type of writing, too. I'd like to include small bits of it in future stories as another chance for character exploration, so I like the kind that helps the plot in that way. (So you won't be seeing any PWP from me any time soon haha!)

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written?

I do, but not in the classic sense where characters from two fandoms get to interact in the same world. It's more of an alternate universe take, I think. All of them have been for the 1917 fandom so far, but I think my craziest one so far has to be The Great British Pastry War in which I dumped the 1917 characters into the GBBO competition LOL

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I don't believe I have, no. Let's keep it that way, shall we?

12. Does not exist apparently (:o)

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I have! And it's a lot of fun~! Please Don't Go (Rushing By) is the only one I've co-written so far, and I hope my friend and I can complete it one day.

14. What’s your all-time favourite ship?

Oh gosh, there are just too many. I never really fall out of love with a ship because there are days when I will be struck with a craving for their dynamic or world so I'll look up fics about them. I guess I always return to Ironstrange, Johnlock, Frostcup, and Klance.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

Hmm, I really wish to continue my Dwelling Impressions series which is a BBC Ghosts AU for 1917, but it is honestly really low in my WIP list at the moment, to be honest :C

16. What are your writing strengths?

I've been told it's my dialogue and characterization. The characters really do act and sound like themselves in my stories, and that's something I'm rather grateful to hear. The point of fanfiction is being able to recognize your favorite characters in it, right?

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I've been struggling with descriptions as of late. I got too used to writing simple cues for scripts, so flowery narration and interesting vocabulary have constantly eluded me. I've also been terrible at consistency, so I keep my poor readers waiting for longer than I'd like (but life has been busy so there's nothing much I can do about it orz)

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I've done it a few times. I can speak three languages myself and know a few words in other languages as well, so I know from experience how your language wires can get all tangled in your head. Recently, I've stuck to simply writing the dialogue in English and simply stating in the dialogue tag that the line was spoken in another language for ease of reading.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Whoa, that would have been Naruto way back when Quizilla was still a thing. Maybe some 18 years ago now??? Hot damn.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written?

Oh no, there's been a lot haha! One thing I like about my fanfics is that I will often go back and reread them because I write exactly what I like. That said...I really like In Every Universe, which is my Ironstrange rewrite of Multiverse of Madness, and my ongoing long fic An Outside Chance. As an honorary mention, I will add A Million Is Only a Statistic because it actually earned its place as an official part of the series that inspired it.

Tagging: @vannral @kiki-shortsnout @aelaer @stewardofningishzida

#tear-chan talks #tear-chan writes #tumblr game #ailendolin #fanfic

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willowcatkinblossom · 6 months

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Twenty Questions for Fic Writers!

Tagged by @bbcphile and @extraordinarilyextreme (thank you both so much for tagging me!!)

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

Can't believe it's 44?? O . O (but I think I wrote most of them between 2018 and 2019)

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

167,565

3. What fandoms do you write for?

Mysterious Lotus Casebook recently :)

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Haha I'm going to skip this question actually

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

I do! I always reply at least once. I'm not the best at coming up with interesting things to say, but I'm always so grateful for comments. Just hearing that someone read through a story that I wrote and felt something from my words means a lot.

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Maybe wishes are hopes we want other people to listen to. I've written a couple fics with intentionally sad endings, and I've always found them so much easier than happy endings.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

The White Umbrella has a really nice ending! It's my ghost story for Guardian if anyone still remembers it :D Also this is somehow the only fic of mine that has been read by a lot of people and still doesn't have any subscriptions haha. Not that subscriptions are a sign of anything really, because I randomly subscribe/forget to unsubscribe after reading fics too. But I think this one really had a good ending.

8. Do you get hate on fics?

Nope. I've been in really nice fandoms so far though :)

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

Ahh no, I'm just not very interested somehow. I'm not sure I'd be able to anyway

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I haven't written one before! I've done some where the premise is based off a different source material though.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Oh, I don't think so.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yep! Literally so honored that people have translated some of my fics T^T

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Yeah, @bluewindfall and I wrote a collab a while back...and we haven't finished it. I think I might be a bad writing partner though. The stars have to align for me to be able to write, and it's like not conducive to communicating with my partner. I, for some reason, cannot write knowing most of the plot beforehand, and that makes it really hard for us to plan anything.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Hmmmm this is a hard question. Maybe Shen Wei and Zhao Yunlan? But it might also be Wang Lu and Hai Yunfan. And lately the MLC OT3 is all I think about. It's hard to choose one.

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

*falls on the ground and coughs blood* ughh there's a few Guardian ones that I still think about, but I think it would be hard since it was a while ago, and what I care about as a writer is a little different now. Also all of my Lingjianshan WIPs ahhhhh it's hard to tell since I've only posted a really short fic, but I've written over 10 different versions of this one WIP.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Ooh so I get told now and then that my writing has nice vibes ✨ haha, but yeah a lot of people have said that my writing has a nice atmosphere or like a melancholy feel to it.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I struggle with writing things that are concrete, and I have trouble with scenes that are very present and involved, like fight scenes.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I don't really have any strong feelings on this. I usually try not to go overboard with honorifics or terms that are not obvious, like I never use footnotes or anything to tell people definitions because I think it's a little less accessible. I do use honorifics sometimes, but I try to keep those to ones that are well known (idk like shifu) or ones that you can infer from the rest of the sentence. It's kind of hard sometimes though, especially when your fandom is really tiny and you can't translate something ('you' as in me because I can't translate anything)

19. First fandom you wrote for?

Guardian :) I think Guardian will always be special to me.

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Ahh right now it's probably my post-canon MLC fic: far from the shore since it hasn't been that long since I finished it. It's embarrassing to admit, but I'm still at that stage where I refresh it daily. But I'm mostly just happy with it because it feels like something that only I could have written.

I'll tag @bluewindfall, @bocje-ce-ustu, @kickassfu, @purplemagpie, @wuxia-vanlifer, @omgpurplefattie, and anyone else who wants to do it :D (sorry for tagging you even if you haven't heard from me in ages)

#tag game

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the-very-awesome-prussia · 7 months

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Aquarium Pandemonium (Part 1)

HUNGARY IS TRANS MASC IN THIS DO NOT MISGENDER HIM

also I wanted to do a part 3 to the "dream saga" and link them both together but then I got burnt out so here's what I wrote before that

"Can you guys please, tell me where we're going again?" Austria groaned as he was forced to a location he didn't know.

"Secret," Prussia simply answered, a smug smirk on his face.

"You must answer these riddles three and we'll give you a hint," Hungary leaned back from the front seat, holding up three fingers.

Austria rolled his eyes, "fine just do it. It'll be better than fearing the worst."

"Oh I didn't have any riddles I was just saying that," he turned back to face forward, "Prussia, do you have anything?"

"Hmm, give me a second…" He started to think.

"In a "second" we're going to be there, riddles are meaningless," Germany said from the driver's seat.

"Austria, close your eyes!" Prussia chuckled.

"As much as I know you love to make fun," Hungary started to explain, "this is going to be a healing exercise. We're not here to-"

"WHY THE EVERLASTING FUCK DDID YOU BRING ME TO AN AQUARIUM," Austria started panicking.

"It was Prussia's idea," Germany stated.

"No it wasn't!" He retorted, "Hungary said it'd "heal trauma" or something… I don't really care. I just haven't been to an aquarium since the first one opened!"

"Exactly, minus the I don't care stuff. To get over your fear you must first face-"

"I literally do not care GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF HERE."

"Okay," Prussia opens his door and pushes him out.

He hits the concrete and then looks up at Prussia, "what the fuck."

"You said to get you "out of here" and "here" is the car."

Austria brushed off his knees as he stood up, "that was brash and unnecessary."

"You're brash and unnecessary!"

"Shut it you two," Germany scolded them both.

The rest of them got out of the car and Germany locked it shut.

"Would it be better if you were blindfolded?" Hungary asked, "maybe if you can't see-"

"It doesn't matter either way it's too late I'm already afraid I feel like I'm dying and nothing NOTHING is going to do anything to make me feel any better."

"If I were you I'd start with taking a deep breat-"

"I think I'm going to die! Right here right now! I think-" and then he passed out. Luckily not falling on the concrete this time as Germany caught him.

"What do I do with the body," Germany deadpanned.

Prussia chuckled as Hungary took him out of Germany's hands.

"Maybe this rest will help him stay calm?" He asked.

"Yeah for the time he's passed out," Prussia snorts, "as soon as he's awake? Boom, scared as hell."

"Can we not hope for the best?" Hungary asked as he grabbed Austria up and started holding him bridal style.

"Do we have to pay for passed out people or is it free of change," Germany quipped yet again.

And Prussia laughed at his dumb joke again.

"I'm genuinely asking."

As they walked inside they gave their money yada yada boring! They walked inside and found a bench to rest Austria for now.

"Before we start, does anyone have to use the bathroom? Any animals anyone specifically wants to see? Anyone want to go to the gift shop? Does anyone need to eat?" Hungary asked as if he was reading off a list. He was, actually.

"No I think I'm good," Prussia stated, "but while you were talking Germany disappeared."

"Wh- huh!?" He looked around but no Germany was in sight.

"Honestly I don't know what you expected. He was more excited to see this place than I was," he shrugged.

"He was? Honestly I couldn't tell. If anything he just seemed like the designated driver."

"We'll find him eventually, first we should have a plan for dealing with this idiot," he pointed to the still unconscious Austria.

"Yeah we should," he nodded, "on my list first it says-"

While he was blabbing on, Prussia ran off, not as sneaky as Germany though.

"Hey! I can see you running!" He picked up Austria and ran after him.

Before they knew it they were in the gift shop and Prussia had bought way too much aquarium memorabilia.

"Look at this guy!" He shoved it into Hungary's face, "look at him and I really mean LOOK AT HIM."

"Prussia there are more important things to be dealing with right now like maybe," he fake coughed, "the unconscious person in my arms!?"

"Hmmm, I have to disagree. What if you go find Germany while I stay here with the loser?"

"No."

"Why not?" He pouted.

"Because who knows what'll happen if I leave you with him! For all I know you could throw him in the shark tank!"

"I would never," he chuckled, telling otherwise.

Hungary shook his head, "where should we go? Honestly I think we shou-"

"AAAAAAAH." the suddenly awake Austria screamed.

"Food court."

"Okay."

They quickly ran to the food court, Austria still in Hungary's arms.

Hungary soon put Austria down when they went to grab the food they wanted.

"20 dollars for a pizza and fries!? This is seriously a rip off," Prussia complained as he looked at the price on the register.

"We're at an aquarium, I don't know what you expected," Austria suddenly seemed weirdly calm.

"I expected the pizza to NOT be 12 dollars!"

"Guys, relax. I'll pay for anything you can't afford," Hungary said before paying for his meal.

"Thank god because there are A LOT more things I wanna buy from the gift sho-"

Hungary stopped him before he was going to say any more, "I meant needs, not wants."

Prussia pouted as he walked over to their table.

They all walked over to their table.

"Ew, this pizza is NOT worth 12 dollars by the way. The fries are good though."

"If you're going to criticize food, at least post it on the internet," Austria replied, scrolling through posts with his left hand and eating with his right.

"Excuse me, I don't live on the internet, mister wise guy."

He looked up at him, "okay mister “I make videos in our basement” guy."

Prussia shook his head, "whatever, it doesn't matter," he uncharacteristically seemed to end this argument.

Austria rolled his eyes and went back to scrolling.

Hungary pondered this exchange, glancing between the two. Usually Prussia wouldn't shut up until Austria or him made him but he just shut up himself. There were different vibes than usual, he wondered what it was.

He considered asking them blindly but that seemed like a terrible idea, so he sat and watched their mannerisms.

#hetalia prussia #hetalia #aph prussia #hws prussia #hetalia austria #aph austria #hws austria #hetalia germany #aph germany #hws germany #hetalia hungary #hungary #hws hungary #hws hetalia #autism #aquarium date #Prussia Lives Life

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shadowsong26fic · 9 months

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Coming Attractions!

First Monday of the month, so here goes!

(And, as is often the case with these, I'll be keeping an eye on my askbox for an Open Question Night. Anything I've posted about here or on AO3 is fair game; I do take prompts but am not necessarily very fast at filling them)

Year of the OTP

I'm still behind on all of these, haha...I still have to do the three origfic ones for June (but...honestly, I didn't...really like most of the June prompts, ah well) and all five for July, plus get caught up on August. Goal is to get all of that done by the end of the month, but we'll see how it goes (especially since this month involves the Actual Moving sooooooo yeah)

Other SW Fic

Mostly putting this here to say that Precipice is not dead because I refuse to let it die; granted I haven't been actively working on it as much as I should lately, but I will update Someday, I promise. Unless I end up falling out of the fandom entirely, that fic continue.

BSG Fic

Once again plugging the Big Bang/Mini Bang event! There's still time to sign up! We are particularly low on betas, and could also use a few more artists. So given the numbers I'm not going to participate as an author myself (though I'll beta and probably jump in to podfic). Also the idea I had I'm not sure how to structure it (Zarek character study; the general idea was him looking back on his first arrest as he waits for his execution; drawing some on that great quote of his from Kobol "It's a lot easier to get blood off your hands than on it" or something like that; sort of approaching the questions of how much of his rhetoric does he (still) actually believe; some things about charisma and leading other people to their deaths; I was going to title it 'The Blood of Angry Men'...)

Other projects--aside from the OTP stuff, I am still slowly putting The Other Battlestar together. No real ETA on that, but it is coming. And it is going to be. Extremely Long, lol. Even if I do end it after Pegasus, which is my current plan (because while I have Some thoughts, figuring out how drastically things would shift after that is. A Pain. I can more or less do In Spite Of A Nail between Atia and Kimble to get the fleet in Close Enough to that same position by the time that encounter happens but. After. Man.) But yeah, very long, because...I don't need to cover/rewrite everything, but there's a Good Chunk that does need to be reworked, plus covering those six months from the Pegasus side...It's probably going to be Precipice-length (200-250k) by the time I'm done, lol.

There are always other things noodling around in my head, but that's pretty much all that's sort of Actively In The Works.

(But sign up for the event! Join us!!!!)

Les Mis Fic

Yeah so this is the current primary brainrot, lol. Papa and J... is picking up again; Ari will start learning some things in the next chapter! And will find it way easier to identify J than initially expected, lol.

For the stuff Ari won't be able to learn (due to letters/records being lost, either deliberately or because...just...::gestures at the 19th-century French governments:: ), I'm going to post a companion piece after P&J finishes, working title Provenance.

The other project which I'm hoping to start posting soon is a Groundhog Day AU, working title Acheron. I'm excited for that one but. uh. Definitely heed the warnings when it comes out because. Yeah.

Other Stuff

I'm doing the occasional origfic snippet that's not connected to the OTP fills; plus bouncing back to some of the AtLA projects I started on at the beginning of that fandom renaissance, but nothing super concrete coming up.

But also pod_together! Writing is done, recording is mostly done (I think?), I'm really excited for how this one's turned out. Leverage in the style of Shakespeare, it's a delight. (Three scenes; one with Eliot and Parker set fairly early; one with the whole crew in the Exposition scene; and a soliloquy from Sterling which was actually the first thing I wrote XD)

I also haven't forgotten about Incinctus, especially since Nocturne finally has an actual Trailer. But I think I'm going to need to rewatch the show and get in the right headspace in order to actually update it (which I do want to do! I just. Got stuck on the next chapter that needs to come out, haha...)

fun fact: watching castlevania was actually how i ended up getting actively back into bsg fandom XD

...I think that pretty much covers it! Like I said at the top, Open Question Night, and I'd love to hear about what you guys are working on, too!

also this is a reminder to me to finish putting together the Story Details form/do a reminder post about the first GBB checkin coming soon...

#coming attractions #miscellania #open question night

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bigbadredpanda · 3 years

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Hi,, I hope I'm not bothering you with this and I'm sorry if my English isn't good, I hope you can understand my questions. I've been thinking about this for a while now and I tried to find information online but I found nothing.

MDZS is the first Chinese Novel I've read and I still haven't finished it yet,,but I've heard about rumors that said that MXTX is in jail, because she sold copies of her books. The rumor isn't true, however it made me wonder something,, I know China's censorship on lgbt related stuff is really heavy and that's why the donghua and drama adaptations of MDZS and other bl works are censored, but I didn't know that authors couldn't sell their novels.

So my question is,, how does MXTX earn money if she isn't allowed to sell her works? She has already finished 3 Danmei novels, and her works are really popular, they even have manhua, donghua or drama adaptations. The adaptations have earned quite a lot of money, but since she's an anonymous writer, does part of it even go to her?

To make the drama, the donghua and the manhua, producers had to ask her permission, I think. So, since the adaptations are doing well, she should get part of the profit, but how does it work? If the Chinese Government really is against lgbt themed works, shouldn't they have done something about her?

I really love her works and I hope that she earns something since she is the one that created all of them. Thanks for considering my question!!

Hi both of you and welcome to the cnovel fandom! Quick intro of the author, MXTX uses a pen name like many webnovel authors, it’s the abbreviation of Mo Xiang Tong Xiu which literally means “Ink Fragrance, Copper [Money] Stench” (墨香铜臭). Fun fact, it’s her mother who coined that name. MXTX wished to pursue a major in literature during university but her mother wanted her to graduate in economy instead while keeping writing on the side, that way she would have the fragrance of ink in one hand and the stench of money in the other.

We also know that she is fairly young, she wrote Scum Villain while she was a university student and she started working on the outline of MDZS in her final year. Tian Guan Ci Fu (Heaven Official’s Blessing) is the third book she completed and a fourth novel is/was in the works, its provisional title is “No rest for the death god” and is supposed to be a supernatural story taking place in a modern setting.

MXTX is one of the most popular webnovel authors on Jinjiang Literature City, the webnovel platform, but her popularity also comes with a great many detractors. You’ve heard some of the malicious rumours circulating in the English-speaking side of the fandom, it’s just a drop in the ocean compared to the outpouring of heated controversies in the Chinese side as the latter can have real-life consequences. There is a different nexus between the creator and the audience and the fandom culture is not the same either, it can be quite deleterious due to the tendency to report any content that one disagrees with.

Censorship in China is... ever-changing and nebulous. How severe it is depends on the medium. Nevertheless, gay literature (同志文学) does exist in China and it is distinct from danmei. I also want to nuance a bit the pervasive idea that anything lgbt is systematically and relentlessly censored in China. The reality is more complex than that and it would be dismissive of the hard-fought gains and visibility that Chinese lgbt activists have obtained these past two decades (some concrete examples: the work of the lgbt centre in Beijing or the pride festival in Shanghai). I don’t know if people are aware of this but lgbt dating apps are thriving in China, the most popular one, Blued, is also the largest lgbt social network worldwide. With that said, the official policy towards homosexuality is the three No’s: “no approval, no disapproval, no promotion”. A stance comparable to the “don’t ask, don’t tell”. It’s not explicit persecution but it manifests in the silencing of public discussion and the limiting media representation of homosexuality. In 2017, the top media regulator that oversaw radio, film and television issued guidelines banning a number of things, this included obscene and violent content, homosexuality, superstitious pseudoscience (such as reincarnation or spirit possession). On top of that, there is also an ongoing crackdown on online pornography that gets increasingly intense. And that concerns everyone on the internet, it’s astonishing the lengths netizens will go to in order to circumvent the censorship, new slang is developed to refer obliquely to banned words, fanfics are published in image format to prevent text recognition, etc... The censorship might be increasingly prevalent but netizens push back with their resourcefulness. Pushing back is also not without significant risk. Perhaps you have heard of the case of the danmei author that received a severe jail sentence? A few Western media picked up on that and criticised the ruling that was deemed homophobic. Chinese reactions tell a slightly different story, the author's crime was not writing danmei, she was in fact accused of making a profit by illegally producing and disseminating pornographic material. I’m not too keen on the details but it seems she printed the books herself and sold them online. To some Chinese observers, the ruling was not discriminatory because she did break the law. To others, it was absurd because this law dates from an era when internet barely existed and it would have been much more laborious to mass-produce and share porn at that time. There’s a bit of truth in all these points of views. It’s also not disingenuous to say that lgbt content is more likely to be targeted than het content even if the charges are not directly lgbt-related.

Usually contracted authors of webnovel platforms have a more secure status. They get a fee from the purchase of VIP chapters as well as tips from the readers. Other sources of revenue arise when webnovels get popular enough to get the opportunity to be published through official channels or when adaptation rights are sold (I assume that the author receives a share of that deal but perhaps does not get any further financial gain from the adaptation or its merch).

To support the author, I would suggest purchasing TGCF on Jinjiang (guide) or buying the physical versions of her three novels in Chinese (shop, change to English with top-right world icon), the special boxsets of MDZS and TGCF come with tons of goodies!

Hope I could be of service and that my tirade was mildly informative ^^'

#mxtx #answers #nerdsupreme #meandering thoughts #trashysiomai

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strugglingclassicist · 3 years

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Hi, first of all I'm sorry if I'm bothering you, believe me this was not my intention... I saw a post of yours talking about how you know how to speak Latin, and, as a fellow classicist (I'm at second year of university, studying ancient Greek and Latin literature) I found the concept extremely fascinating, and I'd love to ask you if you have any tips on how to reach that level, or if you'd like to share your experience of the process of learning this skill.. (again, sorry to bother you and I hope I haven't made too many mistakes, English is not my first language..)

this is not a bother at all, in fact it is a topic I really enjoy talking about so thank you for asking !!!!!

What I think is very important is that you don't have to "reach a level" where your latin skills are good enough for you to be able to or allowed to dabble with spoken latin, you can start the moment you begin learning latin!

My journey with spoken latin actually started by my being dissatisfied and frustrated with my classics program and the teaching (t)here. I actually considered myself someone good with languages, like I went on exchange a year to Germany while in school and even tho I wasn't the quickest to better my language while there, I think I was the one who didn't feel frustrated or disheartened by this way of learning the language. But then I went from this experience with acquiring a language abroad to studying latin language at uni and I found it so. damn. Hard! somehow nothing wanted to stick and I grew frustrated at the way they wanted me to acquire the language and convey my latin skills. the grammatical meta-language has largely felt meaninglessly detailed and a bit nonsensical to me (outside the broader rules) so I find it hard remember, but that means I'm not able to express all of what I understand of the latin in class and on exams (especially the latter feels a bit disheartening). I also disliked that from day one the focus on reading latin texts was that every single word and grammatical construct had to be translated perfectly, and that was the only way I was shown to engage with latin. No room for "Even though I'm not able to translate every word and detail I get the gist of the text, understand what is happening, and can even explain some key aspects of the text" and then working up to being able to understand more and more details, just translate everything perfectly and you get only annoyance/not any credits if you try to express your understanding in a different way.

I do very much understand the importance of being able to explain and analyze the grammar and text in detail, but to have this as the sole approach to the latin language has always felt a bit constructed, unnatural, and unintuitive to me - which is where spoken latin comes in!

I was so lucky to encounter a spoken latin circle when I had a semester abroad at uni, which I felt gave me so much of what I'd felt lacking in my classes. It was enough that I mostly understood in general the gist of what was happening, I was able to pick up on new words as I heard them used around me (often with the result that I remember them better as well), and I was able to start uttering small sentences in latin myself.

Whenever I use latin actively I get to feel the limits of my latin skills, and through my desire to express myself I am also motivated to push myself to expand the comfort zone of my language skills, and to learn more. And I really do mean that spoken latin is something you can do from the minute you start learning the language!

A good exercise I've done some of is to sit down somewhere and see how much of my surroundings I'm able to describe in latin, and it can be fairly uncomplicated stuff, like "aedificium video", "ego in horto sum", "video amicas meas adesse". If you can it is something which can be fun to do with classmates or friends who also know some latin, and it should be something which is possible to do even after having learned latin for only a short time, if anything I find it is something which can really supplement your learning and help your familiarity and flexibility with the language!

I was lucky who was introduced to a spoken latin circle, and if you can't find that at your uni or in your city, I highly recommend trying to round up some classmates or friends who know some latin, or even older/younger students at your classics program - go together and learn to actively use the language together, and you can also learn from each other. If you're on your own, or between meeting up with others to practice spoken latin, I can also recommend trying to write in latin as well, and it can be just as simple and concrete as the examples for spoken latin until you feel comfortable trying to express yourself with more complexity.

I guess in general my tip is to treat latin a bit like any other language, and until recently it was a language used similarly to English today for those of us who aren't native speakers. I have a forefather who learned and had to speak latin in school, went on to become a professor and held lectures and correspondences and wrote books in latin. I also correspond with people abroad in English as a common tongue, have had plenty of lectures in English, 99% of my academic reading lists are in English, and I have had to write essays for uni in English, and all at a uni in my own country. I have had laymen and fellow students and professors alike treat latin as this super special scary difficult and very dead language which separates the worthy intellectuals from the hoi polloi. But Latin is mostly just like any other language, and like with other languages you improve your general language comprehension also through practicing your active language skills like speaking and writing. And with practice we get slowly better and better. I am still very much at an unadvanced state, but my goal is to be able to express both concrete experiences and ideas in latin, just as I've been able to do with English and German.

I feel like since I started focusing on my active latin skills, I'm slowly getting a more integrated relationship with the language. It feels good, and I hope you will have a similar positive experience from looking more into spoken latin!

#aahhhh this was so long but I've had SO many thoughts the past 2 years haha #tagamemnon #classics #lingua latina #asks #anon

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estrxlar · 3 years

Text

The Ghost Of You

08 - Confession

This chapter's songs:

Off and On; SALES

Heaven; Clairo

A Pearl; Mitski

- Y.L. Perspective

"Hey."

The word is distant yet close, making me gasp awake. When my eyes open, I'm in sight of the foggy wet window causing pitter-patter in front of me. 'It rained.' I thought, looking out to the concrete that was soaked. Not that it bothered me; rain was one of the many things that I enjoyed.

Coming back to reality, I notice that the scenery outside is too familiar, and not long after do I realize we're parked right outside of my house, waiting for me to awake. At first, I'm completely tripped out that I had teleported from the skate park to here, but it was just a generous favor from Sugawara.

And suddenly, everything from last night comes to mind.

After Suga had kissed first me, we'd spent more than enough time on each other's faces. But the last thing I remember is sopping down on my seat and falling asleep, worn out, instead of coming up with an excuse of why I made the stupid decision of making out with him. There was not one thing fair about me knocked out in his passenger seat while he reflected on my behalf as well.

But thankfully it appeared Koushi didn't care all that much. Getting me home was one of his priorities this morning.

"What time is it?" I yawn, stretching out my limbs as far as they can go, but that's only to where the seat's leg space ends.

"It's ten AM. But it's a Saturday, so you should probably get some rest today. You went to sleep pretty late last night, and you didn't look very comfortable." He describes, leaning on the door window, staring at the pouring rain. It enlightened me that Suga cares about my rest, but what about him? From what I understand, he stayed up just as long as I did. If not, longer.

So, I decided I should offer something that I was hoping wouldn't make him uncomfortable or jump to conclusions. "Uhm...if you're tired then you can come in too, and we can just stay here for the day until you wanna go home, " I tell him, mirroring his action, and resting both my head and arm on the window.

The invitation seemed to surprise him, for he had quickly whirled his head towards me, asking, "Wait, are you sure? Y-your mom won't be mad that I'm over? Cause– you know..." he trails off, anxiously pressing his palms together, and looking downwards. It came off that he felt almost ashamed that we shared an intimate moment, which wasn't something that he should be responsible for. But even so, I still wanted to spend more time with him. If I'm being completely honest, I wasn't sure if it was because I liked him, or because he was such a refreshing person to be around, but he made me feel better than I had felt in a long time.

"Suga, I'm sure. Look, if you don't wanna hang out that's fine. I was just asking because you seemed tired and said you don't wanna be home right now." My eyes snake from his chest to his eyes, hoping it would give him an understanding that I really wanted him to come inside. "So, do you wanna?"

Sugawara gulps in nervousness, clearing his throat before speaking. "Uh, yeah. Sure. But we better hurry up, or we'll get soaked."

- K. S. Perspective

I wait behind her light brown painted door, running my hands through my damp hair. Small noises of clatter are heard, while I uncomfortably stand outside of her room, waiting for her to open up. To be honest, I wasn't sure about being casually invited into her house after last night. All that ran through my head was, 'did she even like it? Does she feel uncomfortable? What if she wants to go further?

Should I confess right now?'

Finally, her door pops open, revealing her in a change of comfortable clothing and the room behind her. "Uhm, come in," she says, pulling the door wider for me to come in. The room consisted of regular decorations I thought she'd have: anime and music artist posters, a random guitar, a few color-changing lights, and a bean bag chair. "I know it's weird and all. I guess I just haven't gotten the chance to redo my room."

"No, it's—it's fun," I tell her, sticking my hands in my pants pocket. I had to say, it'd been quite a while since I'd been in a girl's room so casually. Not that I was jumping to conclusions, but I was hoping she'd want to discuss things over what had happened. That way I could make it clear to her that I wasn't playing around with her feelings.

She shuffled towards her messy bed, turning towards me, before falling backward onto it. Her loud yawn and stretch echo throughout the room, as well as the low music that she had playing on a home speaker on her dresser. As much as I wanted to feel relaxed, I hardly could. I felt almost scared to stand in her room alone right after we had made out. All I could think of was running my hand against her skin, and rubbing my lips against her hot neck. Now she was casually laying on her bed, looking back at me with absolutely no expression.

"Come, come, " she says, holding out a hand towards me, which makes my anxiety advance to an entirely new level. But following her orders, I hesitantly take it, quickly being pulled to where she laid. The sudden action has me wide-eyed and rested on my side, facing only Y/n. Though I tried hiding my uneasiness, she eventually broke my cover with a simple sentence. "I feel so tired. Don't you?"

I nod, before gulping almost too loudly. However, Y/n keeps her gaze on me, gradually making her eye rests longer. Feeling the dirtiest in the room, I begin to distance myself from her stature, removing the dark paid cover-up that spread over my shoulders, as well as a few accessories I had and tossed them on a small desk at the side of her bed. Then, I took out my phone, deciding it was best to talk to Daichi about everything; I was hoping my friends weren't angry I had ditched them so suddenly.

—

Daichi

How was the party?

Weren't you there?

I left earlier than expected

Around what time?

12:00 AM

That's not that early

Anyways, it was fine I guess

Everyone was being stupid and drunk

I know, good thing I didn't stay so long

Miya said you left with Y/n-?

Yeah, but I just took her out cause she wasn't having a good time

Well, I just took her to some park where we spent the night in my car and I drove her home today

Now we're just napping in her room

I thought you said you wanted to see how things went with her :(

Don't worry we didn't do anything

At least not something extreme

What'd you do??

We just kind of made out for a few minutes

But it wasn't bad or anything

It was nice

Pls don't tell anybody because I'm not sure how to tell her yet

That you're in love with her?? Ahh ok-.-

I'm not in love with her,

Koushi, you told me you've never wanted to want to make somebody feel loved the way you did Y/n.

Well

Whatever

Are you coming to the practice game today?

Oh yeah

What time

In like thirty minutes

Are you serious

But I needed to talk to y/n

I was gonna wait till she woke up

Sorry man

Just leave her a note you'll be back?

Yeah, ok

----

As Daichi had told me to, I decided to find the nearest paper and pen that sat lazily on Y/n's desk. But instead of tossing a few words to excise my absence, I thought of doing something very stupid and risky.

I left a love letter.

At first, I felt as if I was being nothing but a coward for not telling her personally. What would she think if I had just run off and left a confession for her to run through my herself? But after realizing that I could let her think things through, I thought it was the best idea I had that entire year.

And so, I wrote my feelings down quicker than ever imagined, fitting in what I could to convince Y/n of my love for her.

To y/n,

This is one of the most idiotic things I could have done to tell you, but I have a practice game and I can't afford to miss practice right now. As you know, I'm on the edge of having my position taken.

Y/n, after about a week of knowing you I realized that you make me feel like a better person. When I hear your voice or get the benefit of making you smile, it feels like I'm on a high off of you. You're the most beautiful, talented girl have ever met in my life. Without you, I don't think I could have lasted this first week.

I remember the feeling you gave me when we were younger. Even if you didn't talk to me, or didn't acknowledge my existence very much, I still wanted to discover every corner of you. I thought I wouldn't have ever met someone that I was so passionate about like I was for you. And when our first year of high school ended, I felt heartbroken by the fact that I didn't get to tell you how I felt about you. How your essence made my heart warm, how your skin makes me crave touching you, how much space you filled up in my small brain.

When I had seen you on the bus that one morning, I couldn't believe how much you've grown. I know this is personal for you, but you were in a bad state, and it caused me pain to see that you felt alone, and you didn't know how much I cared for you. So when I saw how much you were taking care of yourself, it brought me to hope that I could do the same. If you didn't already know, after my mom had died, I started creating bad habits and ruined my self-portrait. I felt like there was no way out, and that I was useless. But then I met you, again. You brought me to become a better person for myself, Y/n.

I don't want to rush you into anything, but I feel like I should confess to you that I'm in love with you. I've never had the feelings I have for you. Every day I find myself thinking of how lovely you are. And after what had happened last night, I realized, why wait? Why wait to tell you this the way I did in my first year? If I did, then I'm gonna run out of time. I want you more than I've ever wanted anything, Y/n. I think I'm scared that you won't look at me the same, or that you think I'm a burden to you. But at this point, I think I've run out of space to store what I feel for you.

Overall, I love you, Y/n. Please, do me the honor of being with me.

Love, Koushi.

—

I'M SO SORRY FOR SUCH A SHORT CHAPTER YOU GUYS<\3. But I hope you appreciate it. Please comment and note bc it really helps

As always, I love you guys

- estrxlar

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obrienpascal · 5 years

Text

Our Deal

Author: dylanobriens-world

Summary: Mitch Rapp is assigned a partner by Stan Hurley. Her name is Nastasia Aleski. The two of them go through some highs and lows and eventually Mitch finds out some bad news about Nastasia and can no longer trust her. But things start to backfire that can lead them both dead.

Author's note: Hey! So I wrote this on AO3 so I will continue this story on there but I wanted to post the first chapter here:) hope you enjoy!!

AO3 link: is above^^

-----

I knew I had to wake up to go to the bar to meet my new partner my mentor Stan Hurley said I was going to have. He did not mention if it were man or a woman. Although, by the way he looked I can tell he knew who the person was just wanted me to find out myself. I lifted myself out of bed cracking my bones. The dark clouds made it seem it was four in the morning even though it was seventy o'clock at night. It was raining all day meaning I stood asleep till it was time to meet this John doe.

Whoever this person I was going to meet better like drinking at seven at night. It made me think if I should just follow my own path or let them lead the way. Yeah right, if anything they better follow my ass or their out of a job. I don't give a fuck what Kennedy or Hurley says to me. It wasn't hard for me to read people, I take one look at them and I know their intentions immediately. Are they hiding something? Did they hire someone to come with them to make sure I'm not going to kill them or such? It was a gift I had, Hurley helped with it at most but more of me.

Putting on a black shirt with my leather jacket, throwing on a pair of jeans I snatched from my floor and slipping on pair of Adidas shoes, I looked in the mirror realizing I need to shave. I could care less right now. My intentions were to go meet this new partner of mine. I grabbed my wallet and Marbelo cigarettes as well as my cell phone stuffing it in my pocket.

I undid the chains on my apartment front door. I trust no one which is why I put all these chains on my door. I walked out putting my key to lock my door then heading outside. The breeze flowed through my thick dark hair giving my the chills as I stepped into my car.

"Fucking weather," I hissed under my breath starting the engine. My gray Sedan took off to the bar Hurley said my "partner" would be located at. If they recognize me I'll be astonished they wouldn't make a run for it. I've killed many people. Most of them sleep with one eye open because they know I'm coming for them. It's smart, but doesn't stop me from killing them once I lay my eye on the prey.

My sedan came to stop parking in the bars lot. It was packed with vehicles and motorcycles. This better be one hell of a night. I sighed under my nose slipping my hands in my pockets walking into the bar. Immediately chatter fills my ears. Men rambling about the football game. Bar tenders walking around trying to sell drinks, and woman trying to seduce men and drag them to the bathrooms.

Not one of these people looked like a fit to be working with me. Let along able to hold a conversation with half of the drunkies here. I walked over to the bar and sat down on the stool. The man was on the other side taking an order while I sat at the corner with my back to the wall. It was what I always did anyone could sneak up on me. I always needed to be able to look over my shoulder. I fetched out a cigarette lighting it blowing out smoke to my left. Seconds later the man comes over to me.

"What will it be?" He asked cleaning a shot glass with a rag.

I put my cigarette between my index finger and my middle finger. "Just a beer." My tone louder than his over the loud music. They couldn't play better music? Couldn't even hear the game over the beats and the loud hollering from the crazed Giants fans. As my eyes were wandering about they stopped on a woman sitting alone in the corner her back to the wall.

Her long brown hair pushed to the right while she brought her cigarette to her red lips. Her breasts practically were screaming to get out of that tight red dress she was wearing revealing sexy toned legs. She uncrossed her legs when her eyes met mine. The mysterious woman tapped the end of her cigarette letting the ashes fall to the ground as she looked back at me with a flirtatious smirk.

I tried to look away but I couldn't. My eyes were glued to the beautiful woman just a couple of seats away from me. All of a sudden she stood from her chair walking over to me. As she sat down next to me she sat tall with good posture waving for the bar tender to head over. When he came over he tried hard not to stare at her tits. She didn't seem to mind though when he kept sneaking a peak.

Finally, he went to go make her drink then she rested her elbows in the counter bringing her hands together turning her head to me.

"Hurley said you never arrive early." She said to me with a honest tone looking at me with concentrated eyes. I did my best to hide my surprisement in my eyes. How did I not see she was my partner? It all ran so clear. This woman sat in a corner her back to the wall just as me. Along with that, she minded he'd own business letting all this ruckus smooth past us.

"Hurley can mind his fucking business." I snarl taking a sip from my beer. The nameless woman looks away letting out a giggle as the man comes back with her drink.

"Thank you, dear." She says taking it in her hands giving him a wink. The man blushes hard before walking off to another customer. I guess she had her ways to get out of paying for her drinks. Smart girl.

"Would you give me your name or it's a secret?" I ask waving my cigarette around as I spoke.

Her eyes batted as she turned to me sipping her liquor through a thin straw. As she let out a sigh of relief as she was satisfied with her drink of choice she moved her body more to me meaning she doesn't want anyone else to here what she's about to say.

"I am Nastasia Aleski" she smiled through her teeths holding out her small hand for me to shake. I took it in mine giving it a firm shake as I tried to study her face to find a any hint she was lying. I couldn't find any hint of her not telling me the truth or she was just good at hiding it. "I know who you are," she pauses leaning closely, "Mitch Rapp." She whispered that sending shivers down my spine. Nastasia moved away bringing her straw back to her lips.

"I bet you know I've killed people." I say in a low tone but loud enough for her to hear. Nastasia gives a small nod.

"So have I and every other insane person in this world. Your no different. Stan was very clear on who I was going to be dealing with. A sad man who lost his wife and hasn't been himself since." Why would he tell this woman all my deep personal shit if I haven't met her till today. The next time I see him he better hope I don't beat the living shit out of him. "But don't worry I too lost someone close to me. It's not a pleasant feeling."

"Who was it? A husband?" I guessed bringing my cigarette to my lips.

Nastasia shakes her head putting her drink down stirring it in circles with her straw. "My father just when I was a little girl. I was close to him more than my drug addict mother who left us when I was ten. Haven't seen her since and never want to see her again. I do miss my father dearly, sometimes I think he's in my dreams with me." She states looking in the different drink choices on the shelves in front of us. It was hard to read this girl she had years of practice to never let a stranger or anyone be able to read her.

"I'm sorry for your lost."

"I don't need your pity. Now, let's just get to business. Hurley told me to meet at Irene Kennedy's office with you by the morning. Kennedy also knows you won't make it there in time so she suggested I spend the night with you to make sure you get there in time because this meeting is very important." She stated shitfting in her seat to face me. Was she joking? We'd only just met also why isn't Irene telling me any of this? I knew the reason, it would have stopped me to meet up with the woman. It was hard enough to be read her now she has to be with me in my apartment.

"Mitch?" She called out grabbing my full attention.

"Right, sorry. All right, sure let's go now." I tell her stepping out of the stool. I held out my hand for her to get down on her high heels and she took it giving it a squeeze. Nastasia smiled hard releasing her hand out of my grasp waiting for me to lead the way. I walked out of the bar holding the door open for her and she thanked me walking tall outside. It was raining once again as it was darker than before when I just arrived here. The long brown haired woman started to shake at the cold temperature. Standing just outside the driver's seat I walked took off my jacket handing it to Nastasia.

"Thank you, Mitch." She greeted as I unlocked the car and she climbed in the passenger seat. Who knew my night would end in bringing home a woman who is my partner for however long Hurley keeps her in my life.

I drove away from the bar turning on my wipers wiping the rain drops away. She was still shivering so I moved my hand to turn the heat up. The rain was getting heavy by the minute which didn't help how cold my car was. The red light turned green and I drove up the road. Next I turned right and drove up to my parking space.

"This is me." I point to my apartment building. I took the keys out the ignition opening my door. "Well, I hope you can run in heels doll face." I smirk at her before leaping out of the car. I jogged to my front door looking for my key. Seconds later I heard heels clacking against the concrete then hopping up my stairs. I found my key opening the door rushing in as did Nastasia. She throws my jacket to the ground running her hand through her wet hair.

"Boy, was it raining hard. I have to get out of this dress." She says staring down at her wet body.

"The shower is down hall to the right. And I suppose your not going to wear that dress again so I'll just leave my clothes in the spare bedroom." I tell her taking my shoes off to leave them on the mat by my front door.

"Thank you, Mitch." She says once again leaving her heels on the mat then walking down the hall to the shower. I let out a exhausted sigh then walk to my bedroom tearing off my clothes. I didn't mind not showering till she was done. For now I put on a new pair of boxers and turn on the TV. Light flashed in my room from the lighting that just started. Right after the lighting it thundered loudly.

I was surprised she wasn't alarmed by that. Well, thunder storms are more for kids to be afraid of right? I lifted my head from my pillow and noticed it was now soaked. Oh well, I has to get out of bed anyways to give Nastasia clothing. I crawled out of bed to my draws. I opened the top one taking out a T-shirt then next to that draw I took out a pair of checkered red and blue pants.

Holding the clothes in my hand I walked down the hall opening the guest bedroom noticing she already settled in. Her phone was on the night stand along with her cigarettes and purse. Was it okay if I snooped a little? I mean she was in my home. I put the clothes on the bed as I walked over slowly to her cell phone. Finger prints can leave on anything. A phone you'll catch the finger print in a heart beat. My long finger was hovering over the home button until I heard a females voice from behind.

"What do you think your doing?" Nastasia questioned gripping the towel her angry eyes staring back at me. She walked over by me grabbing her phone. I stepped back pointing to the clothes.

"I told you I was bringing you clothes."

"You left out snooping through my phone." She snarled at me her nostrils flared up.

"It's hard to trust someone I just met who's in my home. So I wanted to check if your not someone Hurley did sign."

She let's out a long sigh closing her eyes, "Mitch. I know it's hard for you to trust someone but, I mean no harm. I'm just doing this business for Kennedy and Hurley that's all. You have absolutely nothing to worry about now please can I get dressed I'm exhausted." She explained unwrapping her towel slowly cuing me to leave. I raised my eyebrows then sprinted to the door. Without looking back I said.

"Enjoy your night," I closed the door behind me heading to the shower. I was exhausted as well and couldn't wait to finally get some rest for the hell I'm going to get tomorrow.

I turned on the water letting my boxers fall to the floor as I stepped into the shower. The warm water hit my back as it felt like a massage. I ran my fingers through my wet hair putting shampoo in it. I let the soap fall to the floor, next I washed my body then turned off the shower. I stepped out grabbing a towel drying my hair and face then wrapping it around my waist.

Maybe I should shave so Irene doesn't bother me about it tomorrow. I grab my shaver shaving my thick beard. I put it down rubbing my face as there no longer is a monster beard on my chin. I walk over to open the door walking to my bedroom. Should I check on Nastasia? Or just let her rest? I walked to her room as the door was cracked open. I peaked my eye in not being able to see much which made me open the door a little more noticing she was sleeping with the clothes I gave her snuggling one of the pillows. Good thing she was asleep for all I know she would've tried to leave. I did only meet her a couple of hours ago. Tomorrow better be one hell of a meeting. Otherwise, this woman is in my spare bedroom for no apparent reason.

#mitchrapp #mitch rapp imagines #fanfic #fanfiction #mature #love #partner #alternate universe #dylanobrien #ao3 #archive of our own

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