#i usually don't compare myself with my friends or other writers on here and don't care about posting dates

[taegularities]

hi hi. uhm small thing regarding cmi. if you're a reader, do lmk what you think please 🤍

#so i got an ask regarding cmi that discouraged the hell out of me #they weren't talking badly about it but kind of comparing me to another author on here and asked me #to postpone my update so they're not overwhelmed with all the reading they'd have to do #i usually don't compare myself with my friends or other writers on here and don't care about posting dates #but that discouraged me more than it should've and i can't get much writing done rn lol #just wanna ask.. if i absolutely had to and didn't finish.. would you guys be okay if i posted cmi8 next weekend instead of this week? #and if i do finish... will y'all be around this saturday? #i'm extremely down for some reason lol but i've been outlining planning changing writing etc this chapter for months now and... #want to make sure you guys are around to read and interact #the community labels are already very bleh so it'd be bleh too if cmi8 didn't get any interaction yk? #in any case.. yeah lmk #and please don't ever compare authors to each other guys :') it no feel good #or ask someone to postpone cos of another writer.. #fic: colour me in

[chlorine-and-daisies]

i see people with internet friends who gush about each other's work and write collabs and exchange ideas, and it's beautiful

people who have found their own voice and unique takes on characters

and i enjoy it on one level but on another level it's just like

i'm not good enough to deserve to be let into that

sometimes it hurts more to know that you're not a bad writer, you're just a mediocre one.

like i usually don't get hate or even constructive criticism (which btw i would welcome) on my writing, i've received one or two very sweet comments that mean the world to me

but generally i haven't gotten much of a response in terms of hits/kudos/comments, my stuff just flies under the radar usually, which suggests that a. i need to improve my summaries and tags and b. i'm just not standing out in this huge fandom

there is so much good and unique writing out there, and i don't have super original ideas, i tend to write things that are pretty simple and short and not super original

and also obviously my mostly canon compliant oneshots won't be able to get attention next to longer aus

and i'm young with lots of time to grow comparing myself to experienced writers but god

i often leave long comments on people's work and make recommendations and analyze what they're doing, i try to support others and hope that the friendships will come but it feels like i'm just here alone

because again i can't stand out

and don't get me started on that boop day which was fun but i gave Way Way More than i received and it felt like a popularity contest in a way

i wish i had better ideas, i wish i could write something more touching

i wish i was likable

i have enough knowledge to recognize good writing but not enough skill to write something good myself

i'm so painfully jealous

even in a large fandom the world is so small and so lonely

it's a self fulfilling cycle where the lack of reception translates into lack of motivation and second-guessing myself and writer's block

i finally scheduled a consultation with student health at my college today, something i should have done years ago

and as i take steps to improve my mental health i hope that i'll start to be able to interact with others in healthier ways and stop comparing myself so much

but for the time being it's just so hard, it's so hard

it's ironic how i joined this fandom because of my connection to aziraphale, someone who is also socially awkward and absorbed in special interests, but it ended up making me feel worse about those traits in myself

bc he is an angel and doesn't care about being cringy, but i am unfortunately human

my partner says i should take a break from tumblr if it's no longer fun for me

i probably should

#i'm chronically online and unable to take care of myself #i'm aware that this will not help me make friends it will likely make things worse #just getting it all out #just had to vent to someone who isn't my partner for a change

[crowdemoninkinkyboots]

Can I ask your top 10 fav fics ever (from any fandom, if you don't mind)?

Also, just curious, is there a story behind your name "crowdemoninkinkyboots "?

before i give my fav fics, my username is in reference to sebastian because he’s a crow demon with kinky boots uvu

okay these are in no particular order but here’s my top 10 fics:

Shapeshifter by Honeythief

black butler, sebaciel

y’all this fic broke me. whoever suggested it owes me emotional compensation. but it also hurt so good. it’s in first person which may turn off some people but i promise it’s worth the read

Sanglier by vanroku

twisted wonderland, rookpel with a hint of jackpel

it’s painfully hard finding dead dove/whump content with my fav pomefiore boys, but this is absolutely perfect

Timeless Eternity by GammaRays

demon slayer, kibutan

y’all this fic is dark. but it’s so good. it kinda sparked my thing for captor/captive tropes, and tbh it’s probably my fav kny fic

actually i lied the next two are fics i commissioned i still absolutely adore (they’re also omegaverse lmao)

Knock Knock Little Bunny by mattysones

demon slayer, kibutan

i was so excited for this fic and it was worth the wait. omegaverse + whump is such a tasty combination for me and matty wrote it perfectly. best money i’ve spent.

Torridity by mcpoggy

demon slayer, kanaoi

mcpoggy is usually a giyutan writer and i’m probably going to add one of her other fics here but i absolutely adored how this fic came out. it’s so vanilla compared to the other fics listed but i love it. i need more omegaverse yuri in my life

When I Kissed The Teacher by mcpoggy

demon slayer, giyutan

this is like THE giyutan fic, and also my first bookmark on ao3. it’s also vanilla compared to most other fics on this list but giyutan does have an age gap. it’s super long but i’d alway recommend mcpoggy’s giyutan fics uvu

heads rolling for the one i adore by nyabatos

genshin impact, zhongven

ok i’m INCREDIBLY biased because the author is my best friend but she’s such an incredible writer. it’s also such an interesting au where venti sacrifices his freedom to zhongli to save mondstadt and the aftermath of that deal

The Fall of Mondstadt series by Probabri

genshin impact, kaeluc

whoops my bias is showing again bc i’m also friends with the author but this story awakened kinks in me i didn’t know i had oops

Spear Fishing by reallybadcontent

genshin impact, beidou/fem!reader

ahem. so. i’m not typically into reader pov fics but beidou is. beidou. and i’m a weak lesbian. and ngl i also imagined my oc instead. so. next fic

Dream A Little Dream of Me by BadBadz

black butler, sebaciel

ok i’m being biased again, since this was based off of a tumblr post i made, but i was so happy it inspired someone and it turned out great. of course my fav sebaciel fics have angst in them…it’s like i like hurting myself…

pls lmk if y’all have ever read any of these fics/ur thoughts! i’m sure u all noticed a trend lol

#ask #fanfiction #sebaciel #kibutan #dead dove #omegaverse #rookpel #giyutan #not tagging vanilla ships soz

[damnfandomproblems]

@ 4234:

Not sure if they're checking for any responses, but mostly I wanted to agree. I haven't been in many fandoms, but even the main one I'm in now is alot more "cliquey" compared to years ago when RP and ask blogs were still really common. Now, alot of RP is mostly in Discord, and while I agree the messaging is easier/better than on Tumblr, Discord groups feel more closed off and gatekeepy at times. Plus my OTP is a NOTP for alot of people in the fandom, and I'm not interested in the juggernaut ships, so I get left out of alot of fandom events.

Tbh, I know it's not for everyone, but I've done better in a multi-fandom server I joined compared to any of the servers that are specific to the fandom I'm in. The one I joined I only did,cuz the admin is someone I already knew from my main fandom. I knew they were fair and kind, and they had modding experience in other servers, and it's been overall a great experience, until the server unfortunately died a while back, just due to the admin and other mods having irl stuff come up and take up all their time.

The only other server I've had a good time in was one that's specifically for fic writers in the fandom, which has events and showcases fics of people in the server, so it's alot of us pumping each other up and infodumping about our ideas and AUs.

Something I've had to learn to look out for when going into servers is in rules. Channels that state people's triggers and squicks is well-meaning, but unfortunately, in every server I've been in that had that turned into a wankfest sooner or later, usually with 2 or 3 BNFs in the server attacking each other or smaller creators in the server, using things in the trigger and squick list to harass or claim they were being harassed. Similar wankfests happened if the server has a list of topics and/or ships that aren't allowed to be talked about. Even if someone doesn't mention a forbidden topic/ship in the server, if they post stuff about it on Tumblr, Twitter, or ao3, they usually end up getting attacked in the server or just straight-up banned.

The servers I had/have good times had few if any forbidden tropes/topics/ships. If anything, it was only asked they only got mentioned in certain channels. The few times any wank came up, it got shut down within the same day.

Unfortunately, I don't have any advice for navigating fandom on Tumblr (and I avoid fandom spaces on Instagram and Twitter). I tend to just keep to myself on here, only ever talking to 2 or 3 people and not even all that much.

I hope you're okay, #4234. I'm in a small fandom, too, and I know that gossip runs rampant, so people end up hearing about callouts, even if they don't see the actual post. I've never been in that situation, so I don't know if this is good advice or not, but I'd suggest only sticking to talking to a few people for now. There will be some people who will refuse to interact with you, but even if others aren't actively reaching out, there are others who don't believe the callout, whether cuz they know the person posting it isn't credible or they've become skeptical when it comes to callout posts in general. So there will still be people willing to hear you out, if you choose to stay in that fandom and try making friends in it again.

Definitely close your asks (or at least close anon) if you haven't done that already, and depending on the level of harassment you're getting, I'd suggest making your posts nonrebloggable. I'm not sure if you're a creator in the fandom, so I know it can hurt to keep creating and not get any notes, but it's better than people reblogging your art, edits or writing only to add hurtful comments to keep harassing you.

I might not know who you are, but I'm rooting for you and hope you'll find a space in fandom (current one or another fandom if you decide to move on) that welcomes you.

Posting since this is a response to a previous problem.

#fandom problem 4234 #response to previous problem

[deityoftherain]

Hello there :D

Welcome to my tumblr! I go by Rain (Deity works too) and I usually use they/them pronouns. I am a young adult and my timezone is ET. I do not tag reblogs often and they aren't tagged with anything specific. If you would like to look at what I have written, I have started to use the hashtag #deity writes as a way to organize it all better. You can also look below the cut for direct links to all of my writing! I am going to use #rain answers for anything posted through the ask function whenever I get them too- just for organization’s sake! Feel free to send me asks ^^

This account is mostly for mcyt fanart reblogs and random thoughts, but I am also a fanfiction writer! My ao3 is deityoftherain! I post chapter updates here so you can follow me on Tumblr and/or AO3 to get notified. I consider myself to chill in the PG-13/TV-14 rating though I write for both "General Audience" and "Teen And Up Audiences"- make sure to mind the tags!

If you enjoy my content, please interact! I love comments (I read all of them and respond to most of them) and I appreciate kudos/notes dearly. If you want to add my work to collections of works under a theme, don't be scared to! I'll accept the request. Just do not repost any of my works! Reblogs are loved (especially if you add little comments on them) and, if you want to draw art or whatever other creative work based on my fics (that would be really fucking cool if you did :O but no pressure obviously), PLEASE let me know about it and tag me so I can see it!!! I will reblog them with my #deity writes tag so people can see it when looking at my works too because I want to show it off ^^

If you would like to chat, feel free to DM me here or Discord- just make sure to tell me who you are, where you found me from, and why you are messaging me. I dislike it when strangers message me without a reason for it or without something to say. It is unsettling to me but I do greatly enjoy chatting with people. I don't think I am scary so don't be anxious if you want to reach out! My discord username is the same as my username here :D

Above has all my my ao3 works! Below are most of my fanfics posted on Tumblr. It will take you to a post with the fic's summary and basic information. From there, you can decide to route yourself to the fic on ao3 or there will be a link to take you to its post on my Tumblr.

Discord Server Invite: https://discord.gg/xMQN5XWeHr

Listed in alphabetical order because why not :D

Traffic Life/Life Series Fanfics dream killer crochet & cuddles empty home* festivals and ferris wheels* healing flowers* honeybees, i'm home* isn't that jimmy's hat?* know that all my love will be your breath scott, you're drunk save a spot for me* the boogey* the canary broke his curse now that you've won post-concert highs

Empires SMP Fanfics all is fair in love and war* blood is thicker than blood* i really missed you, dumbass i'm just me* isn't that jimmy's hat?* looking in the mirror* (not) a boy in a princess dress* silver wounds soulbound enmity, spare me dignity strangers to fighting buddies* strawberry tears* the cold is nothing compared to your warmth water & art

Hermitcraft SMP Fanfics i don't want to be friends isn't that jimmy's hat?* (not) a boy in a princess dress* save a spot for me*

* uncolored astrick'ed ones are tagged with multiple SMPs/fandoms tales of the empires ^ click on this if you want to view the collection with all my fics within my empires s1 canon divergent au; each fic can be read separately* traffic life superpowers au ^ click on this if you want to view the collection with all my fics within my life series superpowers au; each fic can be read separately*

Misc Fanfics New Life SMP: sparrow and his teleporter friend

Extra: I have written other mcyt fics as well as for Sanders Sides (and one for The Owl House) but those are a bit older (and I believe am better than I was) so I have not listed them here! You can still read those on my ao3 or my fanfic Tumblr (it is all listed on the pinned post) if you would like!

I’m hiding this all the way at the bottom so it’s a no-pressure type thing and I don’t see anyone actually tipping me even if they do see this but if you want to, my cashapp is $DeityoftheRain ^^

I also have a side blog if you are a Tumblr fanfic reader (and/or want some extra information), but a lot of things broke on me so I have abandoned it as of April 4, 2024. If you want me to post my fanfics on Tumblr or something, let me know via asks or something.

#deity writes #rain answers #tales of the empires au #traffic life superpowers au #<- here for you to jump to things even more easily if you don't want to use the links provided under the cut #pinned intro #welcome to my blog #intro post #blog intro #fanfic writer #ao3 author #mcyt #minecraft youtube #trafficblr #empiresblr #if you read all of this i love you #and you must be obsessed with me ;) /j

[swanimagines]

About BatBP schedules for those interested (and an explanation why I've been so absent/slow to publish new stuff):

I've tried to decide what is the best option for a while now. I want BatBP/Bastard and the Blood Princess readers to know when will the next chapter be published as it has gotten an influx of readers and it no longer is a "whatever, no one cares" situation, so I've decided to publish three requests before each BatBP chapter. I've posted only BatBP since last August, minus the Gideon piece in January and Peeta yesterday, so I think it's time to start doing my requests again properly. This means I have 2 oneshots to post before the next BatBP chapter, as The Favourite (Gideon) was posted about two weeks before Chapter 8 of BatBP (can't check because AO3 is under maintentance).

Also a reminder that from that pile of fics I posted here a month ago were posted on AO3 last year, so they weren't "new" and I don't write new stuff fast enough to be able to post daily, or usually even weekly. I recently came back to cross-post here, which is why I posted all that.

This became long, so more below:

Also I know a lot of you are waiting for my new SaB pieces/oneshots, I've been staying away from those because of BatBP but now I may be doing them too again as I'm intending to do my requests semi-regularly as well. Though I will be filling my requests for my other fandoms too, and I don't plan on doing what I did last year, 80% of my published content being either for SaB or one of Freddy's characters (not Kaz).

I have a few reasons for why I've been slow, one reason being that a thing our family has been afraid of for years is now finally happening. Another reason being that I've moved away from where I lived in previously, and a lot of overwhelming stuff has been on the table since this year began because of it as I'm expected to do and be more than I was, despite being incredibly stressed and overwhelmed all the time. And this takes away from my energy to write anything. Requests, BatBP, stuff I write for myself only, I haven't written anything for months, only proofread and edited stuff that was already written and waiting to be published, and there's a bunch of that waiting for me to proofread/edit to be published next.

I don't want to vent about my personal life in detail anymore here, but I hope you will understand that my life is very stressful right now and I'm trying my best to go through your requests, but I'm not a Superwoman and I've learned to set myself a limit so I won't burn out again. And yes, I know there are a lot of writers who publish long pieces daily, every other day, several times a week, and some of you throw me with usernames and compare me to them, and then get back to me with a frustrated message when I don't answer because I don't want to pull them into any drama. Especially when some of them are my ex-friends from when I still was one of the "main" group.

Also I do have one half-excuse why I haven't been writing much after coming back from the con. I feel slightly weird of writing for Freddy's characters/proofreading my finished pieces for them rn because I got to talk to him and hug him a month ago, and I'm still recovering from that shock 😅 Which is also one of the reasons I haven't written anything new for them. But I'm training myself back into it, because I do feel incredibly motivated and inspired to write 100001 pieces for them at one sitting.

But yeah! This was the thing I wanted to talk about, thank you for reading this far. I possibly have a new piece coming tomorrow or over the weekend, I just need to sort my ready to publish requests out and decide which one I'll publish next 👍🏻 (Gotta go to shower and sleep in an hour so can't choose now)

#kaz brekker x reader #the bastard and the blood princess #jentalks

[onlyjaeyun]

What especially gets me about certain fandoms, is someone will literally request something, then get mad you didn't copy and paste the idea they were thinking of from their brain, like if you have an exact idea of what you want, write it yourself, don't send me a request then get mad since my interpretation isn't what you wanted. That gets me as well, like this is a hobby, we are here writing for free, and you have the audacity to get mad I represent something differently than the idea you had built up of that idol in your mind. It's so irritating, since it robs the joy from something you enjoy doing, then you have people complaining why don't you do this or that anymore, and it's just like because of you.

I was in the NCT fandom right when 127, U, and Dream debuted (showing my age here since I was here the day they debuted), and it was a wild time, like 40 year old smut writers were interacting with 14 year olds, and like I don't even write smut on my blog since I personally just don't, but like that ain't gucci, ain't cool, interacting with kids young enough to be your actual child nah. Engenes seem to be a lot more respectful than other fandoms I've seen, which I feel is wonderful. Like the other day my whole feed was nothing but people sharing minors that write smut with each other so we can all block them, which I feel is so nice, since I remember in my NCTzen days, people would say stuff like oh it doesn't hurt anyone, and it's just like it's hurts me, my heart, minors don't need to see that stuff or interact with it they are children. I know, like you wrote like 10 things about him, then are all oh I didn't know his age, like I don't believe you at all, but okay; I'm surprised they didn't try to pull a 'I meant Taki Riki not Niki Riki' since Taki's 18. The only fandom I feel I can compare to the Engene fandom in how chill the tumblr writers are(or seem to be at least) is the Wanna One fandom, like I had some younger writer friends that called me mom; if anything was weird about the interactions, it was usually them, I'd be like 'go eat dinner and go to sleep you have school tomorrow', and then they would be all '1-800-get-that-dick go get laid you old lady'.

THIS THIS THIS!!!!! when i tell you back when i started writing it was mostly bc i barely found people who wrote content rhe way i wanted it to so i was like fuck it imma do it myself and i wish some people would do it themselves bc how are you gonna get your crusty ass in an inbox and requests smth super specific just to be UNHAPPY with what the WRITER and owner of the blog wrote like get the fuck out of here 💀

and yeah, i experienced similar things in the anime fandom like i lit had mutuals aged 17/18 and then moots who were in their thirties and besides one of them i just felt like both sides overstepped boundaries all the time like girl PLEASE 💀 that's probably why i always stick to my 99/00/01liner babies bc my irl friends are also in that age range and i feel the most comfy with them. (i dont mind you ger or older mutuals ofc) and honestly that whole riki part is just so icky bc they probably kew exactly what they were doing and only felt "sorry" bc they got called out for it yk? but yeah, older fandoms used to be way more chill when it came to the whole different ages but gladly i havent had any problem among engenes on here yet so fingers crossed 🫰🏼

#; mailbox 📬

[teyamsatan]

Hey! Sorry to bother you but I have a quick question.

How do you get your followers to interact with you?

I've got 200+ followers but they don't really talk to me :( I've told them how we can just have a chat, ask me questions, tell me about their day and I even reblogged one of those emoji games?

I've got quite a few requests for the event I'm doing over October, I do get asks from my few mutuals Sometimes? and I do get a few comments on fics but they're usually to be added to the taglist, I'm still kinda lonely 💀

idk, I just want them to fill my inbox with random stuff, I just want to hear from them ya know?

(Now that I've written it out, they do interact quite a lot. Maybe I'm being a bit dramatic here and I should just let them be ...They're probably just shy, I'm still quite new to posting 😅)

Thanks! <3

hi x

you're not bothering me don't worry about it x i think it's normal to look at other blogs we follow and compare our interactions with them - i do it too, i have friends who get a lot more interaction than me and it makes me doubt myself sometimes or ask myself why does it feel like people just don't want to talk to me, but in truth, i think we are our worst harshest critics and it's easy to see it and take it personally, when it really isn't!

fun fact is, i only got my first anonnie at around 700-800 followers? it took me months to grow a following and have writer mutuals that interacted with me or read my stories, and so i think you're doing amazing and should be really proud x these things take time, and i'm sure soon enough your inbox will be flooded with people who enjoy your company and want to share in their life with you x

good luck and smooches x

#☾⋆｡𖦹 °✩ 𝓆 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒶 #.𖥔 ݁ ˖ 𝒶𝓃𝒹𝓇𝒶'𝓈 𝒷𝑒𝓈𝓉𝒾𝑒𝓈

[papiliotao]

hi!! i just want to say that i love your writing so much! would it be okay to ask tips/advice from you to improve writing? thank u sm in advance if u ever answer !!

hello!!! first of all, i'd like to say that i'm very very flattered that you like my writing <3 to be honest, i wouldn't consider myself the best writer (especially my intent when i first started this blog was to improve), but i can try my best to give a few pointers!!

read >:) i think this is pretty common advice, but i can say that in my case, reading definitely helped me expand my vocabulary. fics, books, and even essays can help in this regard.

i'm not sure how often people talk about this one, but there's also the issue of denotation vs connotation. denotation more or less refers to a literal dictionary definition while connotation is related more to the feelings a word evokes. personally i think it's important to choose vocabulary that fits the mood of the moment you're currently writing about. as an example, if you compare the words guest and visitor, they're both words that can be used to describe someone who's temporarily visiting a place, but guest evokes more welcoming feelings because a guest is someone who you're kind of looking after. (i'm not sure if i explained my point well enough, but tl;dr: while synonyms are good, ensure that the synonym that you're using encapsulates the emotions you're trying to convey within a scene as well)

listening to music that matches the mood you're going for can also help! personally i would say that i actually connect with the feelings behind music more than those behind literature, and as a result, i have a clearer idea of the emotions behind what i'm writing when i listen to particular songs.

write about things you're passionate about!! if you're not having fun, then that defeats the purpose

if you have other friends who write (or heck, even friends who don't write) you can ask them for feedback! i definitely have a few mutuals here who i brainrot with endlessly, and their insights give me more ideas for my fics.

sometimes when i'm doing the most random things throughout my day, i suddenly have inspiration or think of a random line (usually one that can be used to open/close one of my fics). if this ever happens to you, rush to your notes app asap!!! i swear i've forgotten certain ideas/lines before, and i was so disappointed because they were actually decent, and i was excited to write them.

when it comes to imagery, i really like using things from the natural world. like, the amount of times i've contrasted/used certain celestial bodies (such as stars, although that's partially thanks to oshi no ko as well ajfidsf), the sunset, and the wind to describe particular characters is insane. personally, i just like to think of a few things i find extremely beautiful/calming and then somehow fit them into my description of a character using similes or metaphors.

anyway, that's about it! i'm sorry if i didn't give you the best advice ahfdfh i'm still kind of new to this as well, but i hope that you'll at least find something helpful here! thanks again for asking though because aaaaa that's literally so sweet of you <3

#letters to rei ༉‧₊˚.

[tawus]

have you ever experienced unsupportive/unenthusiastic behavior or even jealousy from your friends regarding your writing talent or one of your works you were really proud of?

Not openly, no. But I don’t rule out that the feeling may have arisen in some writers here and there, but I don’t shirk from it even if it did. Jealousy is a natural feeling. There’s even a whole chapter dedicated to ‘Jealousy’ in Anne Lamott’s classic book on writing ‘Bird by Bird: Some Instructions on Writing and Life’ (highly recommend btw).

I don’t suffer too much from it (hence there are other chapters in her book that I found more relevant to me), but even I get jealous at times. What my jealousy does, tho, is make ME want to get better –and not in any way want to undermine the writer I’m jealous of. Trust me when I say that in writing I have the strangely healthiest mindset compared with every other aspect of my life…

I also remind myself that writing is just one facet of our lives and there are so many other facets to each person, like: health, financial security, whether they have a partner or they’re lonely, the kind of country they live in (developed or 3rd world? democracy or dictatorship?), whether they’re employed or jobless, and so many other things. So even if someone seems like they’re an effortless and talented writer, I know from experience that that isn’t the whole picture: there’s gotta be something that is difficult in their lives. I’ve never met a person who had 100% of things going for them – one way or another we’re all suffering from something. So there’s nothing to be jealous of and we’re fooling ourselves if we think “Oh, that person’s got it great! They have everything going for them!”

Another little point to note, tho this one is arguable and everyone has their own position on, but talent usually doesn’t come for free. More often than not I see it come with pain: difficult childhood, loss of a loved one, illness, abuse, bullying, infringement of human rights, loneliness, mental illness – you name it. So once again, I feel it’s pointless to want someone else’s talent since we never know the price they paid for it.

Btw your question sounds oddly specific. So if you’ve experienced such unsupportive and undermining treatment, I’m really sorry. I hope you’ve already gotten rid of such people from your life, bc you absolutely don't need them, and they will be a certain detriment to your growth.

#ask tawus #jealousy

[chernayavidua]

your rendition of nat is not as lit as you seem to think for how arrogant and elitist you’ve become. all this petty behavior to fit in with people that are more concerned about aesthetics than writing and friendships. do you feel cool now? the cool kids let you sit with them at lunch. please grow tf up and work on your writing, personality and priorities.

I was 100% going to delete this because I thought it was hate about my portrayal but then it when into stuff about ME... You have the wrong person, Anon. I don't have *friends on here which makes the rp experience very lonely and this is something people do not talk about. Friends are usually the ones that send anons about the person's muse and character development questions etc etc. Friends are the ones who like your posts and hype you up. If you don't have more than 3-4 people who do that, seeing other blogs with 10+ likes or that get memes all the time is hard. It is very discouraging and I've found myself comparing my blog and writing to theirs. But I keep telling myself that having 3-4 people who like my stuff is better than none. Writing with 3-4 only is better than having no one. I do talk to like 4 mutuals on disco but it is always about our character/hot celebs/stuff that is currently draining our muse/keeping us busy and never about other writers/rpers. Also ! Funny thing actually, I have a ranty post in my drafts about tumblr friendships and how I cannot understand them because one minute you're besties and then six months later you're on their DNI with vague posts being made about you all because the situation couldn't be handled in private like adults or things got lost in translation. This, along with a few other scenarios cause me major anxiety.

I don't know what "petty" behavior you're talking about as I keep to myself on here for this exact reason. You either have me confused with someone else or are simply lumping me in with a group that I am wholly unaware of simply because I write with one or two people of said group. I care more about writing than I do about aesthetics. I've made this post and this one along with a few others that I've since deleted where I address my feelings about my own experience on here. Overly saturated icons and heavily formatted replies are in my top 5 rp pet peeves. I'm outing myself here but last week I sent an anon to a mutual praising them for the minimal formatting they use. I love minimal formatting and I’d use the normal size font if it wasn’t so big and ugly. My writing always needs work but my personality and priorities are doing just fine, thank you.

All that aside, I’m sorry someone/a group of people hurt you and or you feel hurt or invalidated by these people. It really sucks. I understand how you feel / have felt very similar ways in my almost 10+ years of rping online, but I can assure you that I am not part of whatever group you are lumping me in. If people are saying I am they're lying. The only advice I can give you anon is block/blacklist and move on.

*the term friends is subjective && everyone has different definitions.

#this was a lot to unpack but hang in there anon! you'll find your people #anon hate /

[blocksruinedme]

SMALLETHO WEEK STATUS: PENULTIMATE REPORT

(please let this be penultimate report)

Okay I have 11 hours to get these out in saturday my time zone and i am going to do it, or i'll take my me off and throw me in the lake (it's right there down the street I'll do it.)

You'd think they'd be done by now. You'd think given how many days ago they were first "basically drafted" they'd be done right now. But noooo, some bitch (me) decided the fic "deserve more" and there are scenes "they really need" and like fine yes I still agree but why can't they just be done.

Red Life fic:

the first three sections are about incidents after turning red than made etho go "huh" about joel. they serve their purpose, but currently exist mostly in the form i scrawled down on the back of another fic in my car after the dentist. I could def describe things more, add a little more reflection about their place in the double life ecosystem as they start murdering and burning

gotta make good kiss at end, and the last bits of lead in, and the little bit after

the main issues here is that i gotta go rewatch DL ep 4 from multiple POVs. at minimum i need pearl's pov of dying, and maybe check for some other people's reactions to joel's shit that are not in smalletho vids but in universe they would have heard. (if only i could shove knowledge of every traffic episode fully into my head, sigh. so much content.

so that's not too bad!

fuck me there's 36 [] around words i don't like/phrases that need to be replaced/etc. fml fml fml

LARPer au morning after fic

apparently i'm adding all this backstory, which means i got to take it out o the author's notes, which i hope will make it more appealing. it's mostly about the party that this is morning after, but it's joel pov and *very* focused on getting laid, he's kinda aware that a lot of shit went down for pretty much everyone else

i want to add a very quick awkward bit with joel asking jimmy about the party the night before, currently he's totally succeeding at making joel (who is very distracted) think he's fine. and it's not gonna get explained in this story, but i'm not setting up a giant mystery, it's just more of "joel missed some shit last night". if that upsets people... i'm sorry! i'm actually very new t writing fic but it feels fine? it's a 5k story, alluding to the rest of the world seems fine

then it's just, fuck holding my breath... 40 sets of []. many many many of them, when i have people look at them, they say "that's fine", and it's just me at "will i have a time to struggle for a synonym/rephrasing

Dear everyone who compliments my writing skill (which i love, keep on doing it)

i hope you are not comparing yourself to me. here's some reasons why i probably have a leg (several legs?) up on you

i am very old and have been writing in one way or another possibly since before you could write.

I legit used to teach sat prep in writing, i have been trained in this and made money on it

if you live like i do, when you are my age you will also have a pretty big vocabulary

i usually edit a lot. I get beta, i throw problem sentences and such at friends, i've gotten proofreading from actual professionals. If i published most of my first drafts, well. I might not get as many "well written" compliments (though i think my plot and characterization would be similar levels of quality, my voices not so much - i have google docs for the way people talks and go through my dialogue looking for places to change things. it's actually great. i could share it?)

it's wild that what is my most popular fic by 3x is the one that went from thought of to posted in <12 hours and thus had only quick editing. so, it's not alway from editing

i just never want anyone who doesn't have those things to compare themself negatively to me, y'know? That said I'm a hypocrite, I compare myself negatively to professional writers in other fandoms. So, do as i say, etc

am i avoiding getting back to writing? yes

back to joel talking about asking scott to help him get tarted up

okay one last thing, me being pleased with my writing - i am jumping between my early 20s larper au and my late 20s/30s burning man au, and i think i am doing a good job at giving age appropriate characterizations to similar version of the same characters. my 21 year old Etho feels 21 to me and my early 30s Etho feels early 30s to me. These ensembles are very much based on my own experiences so I've got a lot to work with, 60 year olds would be harder :)

#me #my writing #larper au

[bunny-rambles]

Hey friend, I just saw some of your other asks and I wanted to chat with you. As a writer on this platform, I empathize with your struggles. The fine balance of making things and sharing your thoughts is delicate, and I very rarely post anything personal because I've learned they don't get seen as much - which is fine, that's why you make friends who can and will listen :)

As for the posts, I wish you could see how incredible you are for even making content!! It takes bravery to do it once, and courage to do it again. With the Fandom getting wider and less active, it's going to be dead space out there but it doesn't mean you aren't a worthy writer.

(I've learned over the last year doing this, you have to set some personal markers to reach. If I get 100 notes on a single character post, I'm stoked! (It doesn't always happen, trust me some of my favorite works have 45 notes on them) and if I get 200 notes on a multiple character post I'm pumped!) I've had to retrain my brain this way but, honestly, it makes me feel better about myself.

AND, instead of the numbers I go back and read old works and say, "wowo, I've improved so much!" (I'm here to make stuff yes, but I also want to get better at what I love - don't let writing become something you hate. Don't let low note counts dictate your worth. You are making something wonderful! trust in yourself and eventually you won't mind what your post looks like because you'll be working on the next one that's even better!

I know it's hard out there, being a content creator can feel lonely, so don't hesitate to reach out. You are more than your blog, live your life and use this as a place to get better at your craft !!

Rooting for you!!

- hazel

I have reread this, and reread this, until I couldn’t cry anymore because I bursted into tears when I read this for the first time. Truthfully, I didn’t want to respond, just keep it safely in my inbox so I can read it when I’m feeling at my worst, but that wouldn’t be fair.

Thank you so much, Hazel. When you put things into perspective, I actually feel a lot better about things. You are absolutely right, there is dead space now for most creators within this fandom, and I always forget that. I mainly forget when I see creators still getting an insane amount of notes.

Another thing you were right about, I got caught up in the numbers, and that was the one thing I really didn’t want when I started this account in the first place. Writing is something I’m passionate about, something I cherish and use to convey my emotions that I keep locked up. I should’ve never focused on the attention it got, but when you’re in this community, unfortunately it sometimes becomes inevitable to compare yourself to other works.

I actually do set little goals !! If it gets past 50 notes, I usually consider it a success and I’m very happy about it usually. I should stick to it but sometimes I just let my head get the better of me. I’m working on it,,,

It’s strange though, one of my favourites I’ve written was a piece for albedo that’s barely passed 80 notes, and it stayed on 30 notes for a good four months. I think I wrote that so well and I really liked how i did it but it’s gotten the least attention. Some of my least favourites have the most notes. So I understand not getting past the goals. But maybe I should take your advice and just hope I write better for the next time.

It’s surreal to see you telling me that you’re rooting for me, when I was inspired to start this whole thing from you and your kindness. You’re truly an exceptional human being and I hope i continue to grow closer to you. Sorry for never reaching out, I’m just incredibly nervous/shy around mutuals in fear of annoying them - I’ll try and work on that too.

Again, thank you. So much. This really cheered me up after this awful week I’ve had <33

#bun speaks #buns moots !! #hazel !! <3 #thank you <3 #I’m going to reread this when I feel that way again #it really helped

[nuclearforest]

Hello phrend. 😎 2deep4me writer asks:

What's the fic you're most proud of?

13. Do you take pride in your writing, or does it embarrass you? Why?

14. Do you compare yourself to other writers? In a positive or negative way?

15. How do you think your writing has improved over time?

Thank u for the ask!! Makes me very happy and lets me ramble abt stuff!

1, Honestly hard to say. Like, I'm proud of One Dog Night because it was the first thing I ever posted and like, really snowballed me into doing more and putting myself out there more. But on the other hand, Month to Love a Werewolf is the first multi-chapter piece I finished! And now Sirens' Guard Dog is on the way. I think those are my big three-- but as far as picking one goes?

It's really hard to say. I can't pick my favorite child lol.

13, Depends on if it is anon online or IRL.

Online? hell yeah i'm proud of being fully unhinged for my blorbo. almost at 350k in 2 years and like. ~300k of that is hans. my really sad sack awful blorbo who i love with all my little heart. stinky, stupid wolfman with a flair for the dramatic.

But IRL? I am a professional with a career you wouldn't catch me dead bringing up writing or fanfic in public. like, my folks asked me once over a holiday why I was on my laptop and what i was writing and i immediately had to bullshit that it was some stupid literary analysis to keep my skills sharp when, uh, it was really werewolf smut. very, very close to being busted but they aren't curious enough to press and i'm a fool not a coward.

THE ONLY EXCEPTION is when i am around those friends that are my enablers and don't care lmao. They think it's funny and it's on brand. Alternatively it's just one facet of the strange little gremlin they've let into their lives. I mean well--promise.

14, yeah. like, healthy or not i'm always out here comparing myself in both good ways and bad. some for learning new styles and tricks and broadening my horizons, but some for like. competitive purposes. and there's nothing to be competitive about but i've been in competitive schooling all my life and for a kid who grew up with little self confidence feeding on the praise of being "gifted" it really sticks with you. so there are many a conscious reminder that it's all for fun. that i shouldn't stress and that it's for me, even if some of that is a lie (i mean, come on--sometimes i'll write shit to brighten somebody's day but generally it's whatever catches my fancy).

but like, old habits die hard and i'm hungry for kudos and comments lmao. usually it doesn't get bad but if it does, i just bury my head in a different crafty pile of sand.

15, I HAVE A TIMELINE. we'll summarize it as exponential improvement and development tho lol.

nobody here will see the shit i wrote in middle school. we're talking paper journal self insert fic that i wrote chapters and chapters of (granted these were like, 100-ish words a chapter). talk about humble beginnings.

move to highschool and i have some fanfic and also a bit of OC work that I share in my school's creative writing club (bruh I STILL wasn't sharing fanfic).

in college I didn't write much. too busy under an engineering course load but i have a few things here and there. mostly fun little snippets of fluff to keep myself occupied.

but that said, now that i'm working and trying to live my best life, i've definitely gotten better in coherent plotlines, length, and fleshing out the details. i still have all the old stuff (even the paper journals, somewhere) and a decade+ later it's meteoric improvement lol. when i wrote One Dog Night that was the longest single story I'd written by a mile. and now i'm on a long chapter work i've updated weekly since i started it following an outline. i'm boggling my own mind.

but that said: i've always been creative and colorful, have not always been able to actually finish a story. funny enough, i've also never had a formal, regular beta and something tells me that won't change soon. (altho sometimes I do ask for a second set of eyes-- so thanks to y'all that have done it for me!)

can't wait to see how i keep growing!

#thanks for the ask #mun rambles

[fangirlandiknowit101]

Fanfic Writer asks:

8, 16, 18 :)

8: Do you take inspiration from real life? If so, how do you incorporate it into your fics?

I do! I mean, not so often in a "this happened to me" sort of way, but I think I put a lot of my experiences and thoughts into my fics heh. But it's often stuff I just think about, like if I've seen posts online about a topic or I read something in a book. Sometimes if I read meta about characters I can keep that in mind when I write. I was reading and thinking a lot about asexuality so I wrote an asexual sasuke for example. That's one fic where I actually specifically thought "I want to write about an asexual character getting into a relationship" and thought of the plot later. If the fic is about being in love with your best friend... haha... most of the time the fics themselves aren't inspired by real life, I just sprinkle in some stuff here and there from my life experience. When it comes to describing rooms and places i do tend to think about places i've seen or visited to make it easier for myself. But mostly I try to think about the characters and not myself when I write haha and not make it like my own life at all, but I'm sure if you met me in real life you'd notice stuff... ah well. In real life I'm shit at talking about feelings and being romantic and stuff so I guess I sometimes think "what would I do in this situation?" And make the characters not do that lmao.

16: do you have a method for getting characters to sound/feel in character?

Yeah I kinda memorize speech patterns and behaviors. I do this in real life too heh it's automatic (i keep talking like my boss when i talk with clients send help what if someone notices). Then when I write I just play out the scene in my head like I'm watching a play, and the characters act it out within the confines of their characterization. That probably doesn't make any sense but it's how I do it. Like it can depend on the setting in the story ofc but to make an example. Let's say naruto and sasuke are having an argument, and they don't know each other that well. What sort of people are they when they argue? Sasuke is not the type to break down and cry usually, unless the argument is super serious with someone he loves in which case he might get emotional. It's more likely he'll close up and lash out rather than talk about his feelings with someone he recently met, and he probably won't consider naruto's view or feelings. And with that sort of "restraint" on his character and the setting they're in, there are only so many ways the argument might play out on his side. He won't suddenly sit down and talk it through like a therapy session and have a good cry about it. He's not level-headed, he just acts aloof. It's a simplified example, but take your character and put them in 360 degrees 3D mode and examine them from all angles, like really spend way too much time thinking about them, and various scenarios they might be put in and how they react, and compare that to similar situations in canon, though accounting for any differences in setting. If sasuke never makes a dick joke in canon, he probably wouldn't in your fic either (those are for sai lol) if you worry about not being ooc. But if x and y and z happens in your fic, maybe he would make a dick joke, and you have to figure out how to write that in a way that's still true to his character. Maybe it's sarcastic. Maybe it's mocking. (Maybe it's just super funny in which case go ahead). The important thing is that, if you write an au and you wonder if it's in character, pretend it happens in canon instead and consider how that feels. Like when artists flip the canvas you know? The flip side is the canon version of the character. Canon won't account for every scenario and it depends on how fleshed out the character is in canon, but there really is no shortcut other than obsessing a little over them. Also great to read other people's version of the character and see how that feels compared to canon. Not because other people are always right but if there's not a single fic where sasuke makes a dick joke, you might think once or twice on how likely it is that he would make one.

Honestly I don't really think about it when I write, my brain just goes bzzzz if something feels ooc lol and I frown about it until I figure out what's wrong.

Already answered nr 18. Thanks for asking!! 💕

[seeingteacupsindragons]

Tips for giving writing advice to someone with poor self esteem? A friend of mine wants writing advice and help editing their writing, but they've always been compared to others by people close to them and they feel that their writing is inferior as a result. They've said that they would appreciate honesty, and I'm willing to point out areas that need improving, but how do I make sure I don't accidentally drop their self esteem further?

This is something I find really hard, honestly.

As, uh, everyone who's been in contact with me for more than five minutes has probably noticed, I'm a very honest, straightforward, blunt person. And I compliment and love things in equal measure to how critical I can be (maybe even more). This works really well for some people: they know I'll be honest with them, they know they can trust me, and they know that when I say something is good, I mean that.

But it also means I'm often not the person to build people up when they're down. I'm the worst at alpha reads and positivity passes. I can honestly love your writing and believe in you as a writer, but unless it's fairly polished, I have to very carefully restrict myself from giving a lot of feedback.

People usually get used to it my Ways after a while, but there's a lot of people I just don't vibe with well because of it, and I suspect your friend is not someone who would want me to edit their stuff.

But I also remember being a young writer and having my dad find a story I was writing with a friend at that time (I was around 8th grade at the time, maybe high school), and he poked fun at the names (the names were bad), poked fun at the dialogue, poked fun at the plot, and it hurt so much. So much I never would've considered letting him read anything else I wrote.

But I still eagerly shared it with friends hoping for critique and feedback. So if your feedback is still trusted by this friend, that's awesome!

So here are some things I might try with your friend, with the caveat that it might not work:

If they've been compared a lot to other writers, don't ever do that. Not in a good way, not in a bad way. There's always ways to give feedback and compliments without comparing it to something else. Tell them what was really effective to you and what hit you very emotionally, but don't say it was like some other writing. Just tell them how you reacted to their writing.

Try not to nitpick. Yes, I'm a horrible nitpick. I will nitpick tiny details and grammar and awkward language. But it's very likely that's not the kind of feedback your friend needs. They might need bigger-picture comments

Try to "live-read"a little. Leave your thoughts as you experienced them. Good, bad, and neutral. Your friend probably really, really wants more than anything to know how the story hit people and what they thought of it in specific details, rather than trying to offer them help or critique or "fix this specific thing."

Basically, try to let your friend know what kind of story they succeeded in writing without trying to tell them too much what they should do or how they should do it. They need to feedback and validation for what they're doing, but offering suggestions can feel very controlling unless they ask for them. But be open to discussing those, too, after!