'oh, you're autistic? you didnt act autistic as a child'
biological egg donor. i literally built a banned school items black market and pyramid scheme in elementary school; and when it was discovered by school staff, the evidence instead framed a school bully who got in trouble for it. the bully literally knew it was me, but the staff didnt believe him. and the staff's reasoning for 'it must not be me?' i had a 'blank face and seemed (socially) uninvolved.'
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the thing about when people say “oh, eddie was just comforting chrissy because he’s such a good guy” or even “his first response to seeing a girl in distress was to make her feel better hes so scrunkly!” is like.... that’s just not what happened there. eddie’s first response to chrissy’s visible distress was to be defensive and haughty. he thought she was scared of him, and it hurt his feewings, so he was brusque and then tried to bail completely. he had a very “sorry to be an imposition >:(” energy.
it wasn’t until chrissy reassured him that he wasn’t the problem, and beyond that, asked him to stay, that eddie relaxed. i love eddie a lot, but it was chrissy who was instinctually kind and empathetic here. she was the one who put her trust in a relative stranger, one most of her peers mock and judge and even fear. maybe he was her only option to get drugs, but she chose to open up to him and be vulnerable. he just reciprocated.
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PAC: 🧸
I was abt to trauma dump all this unnecessary childhood information but it turns out I was just really sad and hungry. BUT because I love all my squishmellow sons, my dino nuggies and ketchup daughters, random obscure void creatures and everyone else I decided to abstain from that. HOWEVER! I am no stranger to toxic relationships and friendships and with how the occult/practitioner community is heres a reading on potential toxicity around you atm.
Pick a meme
Pick a card
Wheel of fortune 🎱
Lord of the Forces of Life, Caph, Palm, Ezekiel, Jupiter
Toxicity in fate and destiny. To me this is like being the only one in the group project that does anything. Feeling trapped in circumstances such as a sucky job or class. Theres always that “why don’t you quit” question when the answer Is “I can’t” either you NEED this for a degree or you have to put food on the table the strings of fate have woven kind of a tricky situation for you. THANKFULLY this card is upright which may indicate a turn of the tides in your favor.
Completion 🎡
Venus 3. In Aries, Chesed through Fire, four of wands
If this seems like the wrong card for the reading you are INCORRECT BABE. This card points to some form of toxicity in the physical which is needed for growth in the spiritual. As of NOW you seem to be going through it but god gives his silliest battles to his funniest clowns and you will learn a lesson which will broaden your spiritual horizon. This is showing that the toxicity going on as of now in the physical is needed to bring completion in the non-physical.
Five of wands (reversed) 🪄
Lord of Strife, Geburah, Saturn in Leo 1°–10°, Angels Vahaviah and Yelayel
Its seems like theres a lot of complex emotions with whatever the fuck is going on over there. Lust, desire, and trickery. Your friend group could be the Real Housewives of Weird ass occult discords. The Saturn with leo is straight up just a bad vibe. It seems to me that almost theres a severe power imbalance that someone is either abusing their power over you, or someone is jealous of your power and status within your group and is praying on your downfall. Wth.
Prince of wands 🎟️
21° Cancer to 20° Leo, Vau, Air aspect of fire Aziluth, Tiphareth
Learning without understanding does absolutely nothing. You may be making a toxic situation for yourself which in turn attracts toxic people. Misery does love company after all. You may be becoming destructive and the people around you are just fanning the flames. Its great you have all this energy for magic and this vest for life but you may want to start putting that into more productive ways so you can actually use instead of abusing what you can do. Not saying im anti-hex I love a good hex phase but not and the expense of who you are as a person. We are as above so below people I do agree you can recognize and celebrate primal fury without succumbing to it.
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A while back I made a species of aliens (still yet to name them ( ‘ - v-) ) that look like tiger-bird-deer centaurs. They live on a cold planet with SO much lore like don’t even get me started BUT they have silly designs that you might like to give a try!!!
Here are some pics in order of oldest to newest
If you want to design one of your own the design parameters and specifications are as follows:
- Very large. Adult humans typically are around their lower body height. They store lots of fat because of their cold environment so keep that in mind!
- They can have almost any color palette due to their genetic pools at one point splitting into different environments, adapting and the reconvening as they advanced technologically. Their stripe patterns can range from light to heavy. The more magically inclined they are the more likely they are to have more saturated or higher contrast colors. (Ex: The purple/pink/blue colored one with the horn accessories pictured above) Their flesh tones are not restricted to that of human flesh tones. Their horns do tend to be darker than the rest of their palette though!
- Wings can be based on any kind of bird (or none at all!) as per their wide genetic variety! Some have very short or even lack tail feathers, but their tail feathers usually match the function (design) of their wings
- Their horns can be all kinds of wild shapes! They tend to remain reminiscent of horns or antlers you can see naturally, but can get pretty wacky.
- Their scleras are almost always black unless they have specific eye conditions or for some reason have magically altered them to be otherwise! Their regular eye colors can be anything though!
- Their underbelly markings are not very consistent and can cover as much or as little of their bellies as you please! A fun little motif with them though is diamond/rhombus shaped markings somewhere on their person, typically the same color as the underbelly
- They are able to interact with humans and eventually in their endeavors for scientific exploration are able to transpose another species’ consciousness into an artificially (likely magically) constructed vessel of their species
- They have veeeeery thin whiskers, if you wish to draw them!
- It is far from uncommon for them to have disabilities (especially limb-related) due to their complicated physical structure! Do not be afraid to design your centaur with a disability (and hey, I’d love to see what kind of ideas people might have for prosthetics! Go crazy!). Their society generally treats their disabled very well
👍 secretary bird + bit of reindeer guy
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