#im smiling i just want him to do well

[moeblob]

Deacon loves two things: Ymber and digging himself a grave.

Fulj hates one thing: Deacon.

#my characters #waiting on some info on the next commission so i indulged in ocs today bc i doubt i will have as much time for lil comics for a bit #deacon is so devoted hes like yeah i would kill for a deity that could easily kill anything himself but yknow teehee #and fulj just did you tell him you needed therapy also does he even know youd murder in his name #deacon caught red handed haha no of course i havent told him it should be obvious enough haha.... and its in his defense not his name :c #man really does have some issues but i love him so much and hes so devoted but like. unhealthily after a while #he does in fact need a chill pill and therapy but to be fair #ymber has needed therapy for centuries and yet he just bottles it all up and suffers so #its pretty unhealthy until they yell at each other one (1) time bc they are so insecure about things and get mad over very valid reasons #but then theyre like you know what that was necessary and i still want to stay by your side if you let me #and then fulj is like dude hey sorry you seem really happy did you fu- and ymber is like no please stop there we have not #fulj just squinting cause have not is very different than will not but whatever she doesnt wanna think about that with deacon involved ew #and eventually fulj is like hey ymber im sorry to say but i really do hate deacon and i dont even know why but he makes me uncomfortable #while deacon is just. in the room. hearing this and thinking how he knows she thinks hes weird but wow that wording hurts #and ymber doesnt wanna fill in memories better forgotten by fulj which she had forcefully removed #so he just says oh well his hair and clothing are black and you had someone in the past that you might see in him and its not a pleasant en #so you know maybe its that idk #and fulj is then WHATST i was rude to him for someone i cant even remember? lame im gonna try SO HARD to be nice to him now #and deacon just still sitting there with some food like this is v awkward and i wish i could not be here for it #and later he asks ymber about who he resembled and as ymber is descibing her it clicks in deacons head and he gets really sad #that he might somehow remind fulj of the woman she loved before she was punished for loving a mortal #and he feels kinda bad pestering her so much with his curiosities about deities and he kinda gets it #the fact hes close to ymber might remind her at the core that she was once that close with a mortal if not closer #anyway story time in the tags again #im so obsessed with these peeps and i have made them suffer so much but they do all end on a happy note #its still funny and nice to me that while fulj is creeped out by deacon and doesnt like talking to him #he still expresses the most emotions to her - he tries hard to remain serious around ymber and collected and obedient at all times #and when out and about with ymber he has to be intimidating and refuses smiling but fulj?? all sunshine and smiles and emotions easy to rea #and she is just that is so weird go away i hate you

[baby-xemnas]

a breed of guy

(they couldnt be more different)

#ill love gin forever...best boy...if noone got him i got him #law can keep winning his popularity contests #my art #gin one piece #law #one piece #add: looking at refs (my own old art lol) and smiling cuz gin's nose have been broken many times #hes had so many broken bones that healed in less than optimal conditions #law is so well kept its not even fair to compare #i love thinking about gin as very sick guy. i so rarely do this but that is him to me. #remember i said i dont want law to keep spots on his skin? #well thats absolutely different for gin to me he is gonna suffer from effects of that poisoning for the rest of his life #he never had proper care #he is just broken all over from a real shitty life he lived. but hes the most stubborn beat up dog there is #he's never gonna die no matter how much blood he coughs up and scares the shit out of sanji with it #im using my personal familiarity with lung issues and blasting them on gin #i never do this fr. he's very special

[jazzzzzzhands]

Thinking about a time when Clown said that one of the first things Wally learned was how to hold things gently, carefully. So that he didn't break them

#help i'm still figuring out how to draw frank!! #he just sees frank's reaction and is like oh!! #i think that he doesnt even realize that this is bad untill he sees how horrified frank is #wally darling #frank frankly #welcome home #whps #i love that his expression doesnt even change at all #i love wally so much ahahaha #his little face makes me smile so so big aaaaa! #ahh well he did a little oopsie nbd #apparently clown said this on a stream #jazzsketches #i rly like how i drew frank in the first panel but i struggled trying to replicate that #im getting really comfy with canon style wally but i want to stylize everyone else ahahaha #i want to give frank glasses #he deserves them #i want to do to wally what he did to the butterfly but affectionately #my loving gaze never changing as i crumple him up like a wad of paper #do i put a warning? no butterflies were harmed in the making lmaooo #my sketches are so light uwaaaa even with editing you can barely see frank in the first panel

[boxwinebaddie]

Hi Uncle Nina !!

I don't wanna clog your ask box with stupid shit but this is stupid shit but it was also my bday on the thirteenth so shjdjdjs

As a fellow Monster addict ( I got a flat of Monster for my bday and collect the cans I have 30 diff ones so far <3 ) I need to know what Stan's favourite is

And on the less stupid side of things I was also hoping to potentially hear more about Stan's trans journey/Kyle finding out Raven is trans

Also I'm sorry your job has been so stressful lately :(( I hope you have a good day 🧡

- Stan 🧡

hi orange heart stan! <3

it's so good to hear from you, baby.

HAPPY BELATED BIRTHSLAY, MY LOVE! i'm sorry i'm a little late, but you know me -- everything i do is fashionably late, darling. ;)

but also!!!!! call your wonderful, lovely ask message stupid shit again!!! see what happens!!! i'm gonna frown So WIDE, i'm gonna look so Upset. i'm going to hold you up to the sun!!! JUST WATCH!!!! >;/

my sweet stannie; you are a gift, a treasure. and your ask memes are a pleasure. i don't find them stupid in any shape or form, be nice. conversely, they are extremely special to me and it's why i put off writing this message for a little while because i wanted to respond to it thoughtfully, seeing as though it's your bday message.

which, *cracks knuckles* to get the ball roooollling.

i can absolutely tell you what monster energy is stan's favorite, but as a bday bonus, bc i wasn't sure which stan you wanted to know about, or if you wanted both: i'll give you both my style's fave monster flavs

and i was going to go into some ravenstan trans lore after that, but i feel like that info should go in it's own ask, yeah? i just don't want it to get cluttered. so if you feel so inclined, would you mind sending me a second anon where i can drop that info? thank you, baby! mwah

but now, w/o further ado...

please enjoy the most Refreshing part of your day <333

for context ( and actually because i got an anon once who wanted to know whether i drink energy drinks ), i don't really know that much about energy drinks/flavors because i don't really drink energy drinks.

i mean okay, i'm not really sure if it counts as an energy drink, but i will chug a guayaki yerba mate like it is the elixir of life. ( also i fully maintain that pep stan drinks the enlightenment flavor and ravenstan drinks the raspberry one -- crunchy eco kings ) my favorite one is the passion terrere one. it's like the only one that doesn't come in a can and only comes in a glass bottle...that ice cold passion terrere mate in the glass...it hits so different than the can...oh my god. so good.

and as far as monsters go, i pretty much only drink pipeline punch bc i'm a pretty pink princess and that's what hot girls drink <3 but other than that i drink black coffee because i am an exhausted teacher girlie, but that's purely for fuel. to be honest, i rarely drink energy drinks just for fun, i only have caffeine to stay upright.

which isn't a great idea...but...i am not a role model....

speaking of:

so i told riley this story the other day, bc i needed to get her brilliant genius girl insight on energy drink flavors because she is the sugar free energy queen ( riley's answer was kyle x ultra strawberry dreams and stan x ultra mango fiesta, which, everyone say thank u riley <3 )

-- also god if you are real, bring back the watermelon lime venom you discontinued, you sick fuck, it was riley's favorite, thank you for giving us lovely orange heart stan, and fuck you very much for making ME, bitch! come on down, king! you won't! why the fuck would you extend my coworkers vacation! fight me, ugly!!!! --

and i was telling her about how i am the chaotic kenny friend, i make really bad, chaotic decisions, have no self preservation, hype and gas up my extremely bad ideas and convince myself i'm big brain, wow.

and...oof. so like 2-3 years ago during finals week, i had a fuck ton of essays and projects due ( i was a very bad student btw which is funny bc i'm a teacher ) and no idea how i was gonna do them, so i had the Brilliant Idea...to buy three Random bang energy drinks...

AND SHOTGUN ALL OF THEM BACK TO BACK LIKE BEER CANS.

ohhhhhhhhhhhh my god, party girl nina. help. crying.

and yknow, i thought this was such a good idea! i was like wow i'm gonna be so awake, i am going to b invincible.

i....was not Invicible. i was...very, very sick. i was like almost catatonic and shaking on the floor of my dorm bathroom, lmao. i had to have my roomate take a picture of me on the floor and text all my teachers what happened, which, thank god they were all really nice and laughed but...i feel like that tells you everything you need to know about me...people who think i'm their hero...i am a fucking idiot.

but!! BUUUUTTT! just for You, baby. i deep dived a lot of forums and read a lot about the flavor profiles and think...i made a pretty accurate assertion of what my kid's energy drink preferences are <3

me: paris hilton pipeline punch bc i am bad as hell ;)

stan the man with the plan: okay, so i think that pep stan is definitely that ultra paradise monster energy. it just seems really crisp, clean, earthy. stan also doesn't really care for sweets or sugar, so it makes sense to me that he would be drinking a zero sugar monster ( kyle is disgusted ) idk the kiwi, lime, cucumber flavor profile just feels like pep stan. please tell me you can see the vision, help.

kyle pile: hmmm...so what i've concluded with my research is that kyle pile probably likes that pacific pipeline monster that seems to taste like fruit punch <3 it has to be the full sugar ones because of his blood sugar and stan does kind of scold kyle for drinking them bc he's not really supposed to and he gets really cracked out ahdslkshd like he's really cute but stan is like oh my god bro you gotta lay down but yeah i think that one or the orange dreamsicle one, which is hilarious because the only foods stmwtp canonically does not like are pickles and artifical orange flavoring...he really loves kp.

raven: soooooo i know that i said pep stan was the mango loco monster energy, BUT RAVENSTAN IS LITERALLY THE MANGO LOCO MONSTER ENERGY LIKE HELLO??? also i feel like he is like those mexican dads that put a little tajin in whatever they're eating and act like they've invented fire heeeeeelp ravenstan is so the dad that cuts u up fruit into little shapes and pus tajin on them and feeds u them when ur sad <333 luv u raven ;-; <3 but yeah i feel like he full on turns it into a raspado its so unserious sometimes theres a shot in there, it's usually the spicy tamarind smirnoff vodka,

...what can i say my man is a visionary and i see it

jersey: oooookaaaaay. so...sigh. for Obvious Reasons, pre and during rm, because of kyle's ed, he only drinks the sugar free monsters. for energy because he's exhausted ( my baby </3 ) but i also do think he thinks they taste good. i think he fucks with that ultra watermelon flavor that just tastes like the most beautiful, delectable, mouth watering liquid watermelon candy ever. i also think he could rock with the strawberry or the peach one sounds dank.

if the watermelon one isn't there it does stress him out, but he has a mental list of what one is next on the tier list, and acts accordingly. its kind of a nice change of pace but...his brain does not think that. however, when kyle is healing, weirdly enough, i think he ACTUALLY LIKES???? those coffee flavored ones??? which is Insane and everyone including tweek points and laughs at him

i hope...that suffices? you're totally welcome to offer me what you think is the right answer: you're the monster expert, after all. but this is what i feel in my heart! i think it feels accurate but, lmk! :')

and also...speaking of my job. UUUUUUGH. thank you baby. :((( i am actually criminally depressed because my fucking HOE-WORKER fucking extended his vacation ONE MORE WEEK! so i have to cover all his shifts for an extra week while he's on vacation. so that means i don't get to watch my testing accommodation kids who i miss very much, i still don't get his kinder reccess shift and literally??? spring break is next week like he couldn't WAIT???? holy fuck i'm Sad. :(

but i will be fine darling. but it's actually why i wanted to see if you could send me another anon so i can use that anon to talk about trans stan journey stuff? i just don't want it to get lost in this post and also, i'm not in great spirits rn and don't want to answer it until i can write something that's not flaming garbage.

but happy late birthday baby, i'm so glad you were born. <333

-uncle nina, monster shot gun queen

p.s. what is your favorite monster energy? :)

#BB IF YOU CALL YOUR MESSAGE STUPID ONE MORE TIME #I AM GOING TO PUT YOU IN SO MANY BLANKETS AND FEED YOU SO MANY SNACKS AND BRAID UR HAIR #KNOCK IT AWHFF!!!!!! #you are so loved and this was no stupid at all and i actually had a lot of fun reading all about all the monster flavors #i'm sorry if its not totally accurate i did my best #i'm sorry the green one is so much more pep stan #and the mango loco one is actually raven #like thats just the right answer #ravenstan drinking the mango loco monster w the tajin rim...like he's kind of a genius oh my god #him turning them into a cursed mixed drink is foul tho i just know his head hurts after that #i cant believe i had jersey likes the coffee ones that is so foul #but him drinking the no sugar ones and drinking the candy flavored ones bc he is like 7 years old #theyre so cute lkahdkshd also kyle pile also likes the cherry blade lemonade bang energy that feels right to me #BUT YEAH I HOPE THIS MADE YOU SMILE #TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK HAHA #also sorry i didnt give you the Serious answer in that post but ravens trans journey is really important to me #and i really want to honor that and not rush it or write it when i am in a bad mood...ill make it worth it for you my love #but uuuugh no im in such a bad mood like im actually so frustrated like this is just not fair to me #me n the older kids are starting to kind of be alright but it kind of ebbs and flows like its better somedays and worse others #but they are stuck with just me for another week so were managing tbh my coworker was dad and im mom basically #im more like stepmom and they dont really like me bc ur not my real mom but like at least im nice lmao #but yeah happy birthday baby hope you enjoyed this and i will get you the answers you seek very soon mWAAAAH #also not me shotgunning 3 bang energies and throwing up and having to have my friends email my professors #when i tell you im not a role model i mean that i am a joke i make such bad decisions #live fast die young bad girls do it well

[todayisafridaynight]

One moment in Y3 I'll never get over is Daigo, fresh out of coma, instinctively reassuring Mine with such tenderness. Yeah it made him feel more guilty, sure. But at that moment I was like "I get it, Mine. I now get why you're that obsessed". Doesn't make it better that Daigo is pretty pretty with a wonderful voice and gorgeous shoulders

this ask was so real and true and right and it still is but i am cackling a little at 'daigo's gorgeous shoulders'

#snap chats #wide daigo strikes again #on the real tho no wonder mine wanted to kill himself after that #like here he was about to kill daigo because. Hes Insane #and then as soon as daigo wakes up he rolls out of bed- uses the gun mine wsa gonna use on him #saves mine and kiryu and then without question is just '<:0 mine whats going on- are you ok <:0 we're ok now no need to worry :)' #and then he hit him with that loving smile and that gentle voice and. and yeah i wouldve jumped off the roof too #i could never forgive myself for almost killing a man as beautiful as that idc if i thought i was doing the right thing #mine this why we leave this typea shit to the doctors just WAIT DUDE #unless this really was a case where because of all the outside noise daigo woke up #since i know talking to coma patients can help with that and. well. probably was the most noise daigo's gotten in days #aww poor daigo didnt have anyone in his hospital room to keep him company this whole time #either that or mine really did just sit in dead silence looking at him. freak. but ok valid #its too early for daigo-loving hours <-this is a lie and if i ever say this again assume im an imposter

[robotsafari]

was trying to see if i could outclass a triple-a unreal engine game in the whimsy department (i think i did.)

#beep boop you want fries with that #kingdom hearts #ansem #i dont even know what the original scene is and i dont care. #i know theyre not handling ansem well. #you didnt even try to recreate his fuckass smile smh #if this shows up in the tag idgaf i use it for easy sorting . get real. #i didnt want to sound pretentious im just mad. #fucking. im gonna miss you ansem. fuck off. he never went anywhere. #what if we all blew up. they did nothing interesting with ansem post-com. you dont do anything new with him. #you never bothered to ask the questions no one wanted to ask about this character #maybe im just insane but. maybe if riku got ansem to talk about literally anything else #[SQUARE-ENID UNLEASHES FIRING SQUAD UPON ME] #not even gonna bother correcting that typo #anyway im gonna go back to working on that ansem essay #huh what who said that

[trashbaget]

tell me your failed/embarrassing flirting stories to make me feel better, i’ll go first: today i said “get out of my way” forgot to say “i’m kidding” then immediately said “bye”

#it is awful having feelings for someone you know and have an established friendship with #but crushing on someone i barely know is knew to me and i legit feel like an idiot every time i do something stupid like this #i can’t just. talk to the guy #if i say hey and he says sup i say ‘sup indeed’ like what the fuck is that #i can barely even say hello to him #don’t get me wrong i’ve DONE it but most days i’m like #ah fuck there he is #okay you can do it just say hi #just say what’s up #and then he’s already gone #also. like. the setting we’re in is soooo not good for talking or flirting realt because um. it’s work he’s my coworker.. so um. do i fuckin #ask him for his number?? or to hang out??? but like. he’s kind of a stranger to me what do i want to hang out for 🧍 #but like. ​i dont want to do that until i have at least one successful interaction #or like. an actual conversation. #which is gonna be really hard to manage because he doesn’t talk much at all to anyone and i really only talk if someone talks to me first or #i’ll say something absolutely idiotic and ridiculous (and honestly i do that no matter what) #anyway so um. i guess i’m just gonna keep making a fool of myself until i get it right and hopefully i don’t screw it up 🥴 #i lost all my confidence in the last year and i cant do anything chill or smooth anymore (i was never that good in the first place but at #least i could PRETEND i knew what i was doing. like i could sell it. the whole weird and lost bit.) #anyway. i felt better for like 5 minutes when some guy at the gas station flirt failed with me on the way home. but that’s partly my fault #too oops. in his defense he probably could not see that i had headphones on bc upon mirror inspection they were well blended with my hair #but i was waiting to cross the street and this guy tried to like nod and smile and i did not know it was to me until i got to the other side #where the gas station was and and like. tried again and i awkward half smiled and saw his face get all mushy and confused like mine FELT 20 #mins before when i’d flopped so hard trying to flirt and by the time i’d processed WAIT i think he was FLIRTING WITH ME i was already gone 🤡 #but at least it ended better than the poor 14yo who very confidently asked for my number #who. i shit you not. SCREECHED for a solid 44.5 seconds and bolted the other direction when i said sorry im 21 #his friends were standing there like wtf too and one was like i am so sorry about him 🤦 #cheers to being fools universe

[aqqleshiqqing-archive]

red is soooo cute 🥺🥺🥺🥺♥️♥️♥️

#hes so for meeeeee hes so for me #hes so for me 🥺♥️💞 #i really wanted to get a solo pfp of red (if i didnt have enough appleshipping art from others) and. well. i had to do it now... #i love how ppl draws him <3 <3 #i wish i could hug him :[ his big boy self :[ weeseeghdh #i wanna hug him so bad guys i just #im so mushy today don't look don't look #wuejekjsjskjsejkw!!!!!!!!!! im smiling a lot tofaybecause of hihmhmhmmm eehehhuhue #red.rom #thats mmymyyy husbabbdnnd

[sickmachete]

girl help i cant stop drawing men covered in blood

#was sketching out ideas for my western au thing but then i wanted to do a closeup of hannibal #so now ive just got this portrait of him smiling with blood on his face and idk what to do w it #bc idk if ill finish it it was just for fun and to practice w aksdjhfgds so now its just sitting here #txt #i always get stuck like this where i wanna finish but. well #Stares at the 5000 wips in my art folder uhhh #theyre all basically finished pieces too asdhdgh im just dumb

[owl-o]

big shield, bigger heart.

#im literally in love with him #hes! wonderful!!! #and i love his smile :') #i want to give him a big ol hug #i think he gives great hugs #like im #i was out of apex for a bit and ljke. havent been very excited abouf characters since i learned seers va is like. That #but THIS GUY #THIS MAN #i just love him #hes also fun to play!! #i do pretty well when i play him #anyways ima stop. talking in the tags now #newcastle #jackson williams #apex #apex legends #my art #art

[cannibalismyuri]

(song added by me)

#i am so Unwell rn what the fuck. #/pos So Fucking /pos #so the art ask was from u as well....elijah ur so secretive and suave this is Too Much for a girl to handle #willelmax in the arcade and byler valentine cards ur too sweet to me i actually cant Take This :') #you're right our friendship IS on another level esp now because i've never felt So Connected to someone its insane #im a little surprised but it makes sense that its you yk #like you're so naturally sweet and kind and amazing at ur core so OFC it was u #and good job i can never listen to (you) on my arm without thinking of you /pos /pos /pos /pos #this is at the TOP of on the list of the pretty little things i've been given #ik i sound like a broken record but its so insane how much i love you. i didnt know i could bond w someone over anon sm and i JUST. idk #its something abt me never getting something like this and idk never ever feeling so cared for.... #you deserve all the pretty things and someone who never lies to you and someone who wants to be on your arm so bad that they write a song #about it and someone who cares about you so deeply that they think about you at night and smile so big that it hurts and someone who loves #you so much that it hurts physically and someone who thinks of you now when he listens to songs sometimes and someone who cares #about you so intensely that when he's reading messages from you she feels comforted and your words are smtg that's on repeat in her head no #and someone who wants to mail you flowers so bad because you made him feel so amazing and someone who recognises how much you deserve #and wants to give it all to you so bad and someone who loves you as much as you deserve. #and i wanna do all that and be that person so bad and i'm gonna send you a daily ask now because you mean so much to me #and you deserve someone who makes pretty things for you too and someone who tries so hard to show it #and im GONNA. im gonna try So Hard. #you'll probably get so sick of me but believe me i'm gonna make you feel as special and amazing as you made me feel. believe me. #anyway yeah. i care about you a totally normal amount #if you read all of this just know i love you so much it hurts sometimes 💗💗 #my feelings towards this are : 💖💝💓💞💘💕💗⚡☀️✨⭐💫🌟 #elijah my heart my love letter my special and awesome best friend my heart anon elijah #<- better tag for u because you deserve it so fucking much #elijah <33 #<- ur old tag too so u can look thru my blog and see this whenever u want #heart anon #<- for me. so i can look at this for hours and find it easily so that i could complete loving elijah hours daily

[maniaparty]

i have so many juliya comics in my mind  i need to not forget them

#dont read this if you dont want spoilers. -> #umm ones a cruliya shoppingthing cuz ithink hed be super curious abt how crucy wants 2 change how she looks #umm. the obvious juliue talking about The Room situation. and also it bugging him 4 no reason #julikaua talkingabout grass (THIS SOUNDS SO STUPID BUT IPROMISE ITS INSANE) #the fireflies one... (smiles) #ummm....... sorry youguys get to hear the ramblings of an insane man #julimari gender one too. that ones. (sniffles) #OH MY GOD.HOW COULD I FORGET THE MOZYAT ONE #that one scares me but i see it so well #also one of juliya calling gsc over and over just because its cute i love his weird friendship w/ the girls there #eurmmmm.... what elsOH RIGHT. OF COURSE #iwanted to do one where hes thinking about his life now compared 2 when he was under surveillance and itd be nice for him to leave a final m #message 2 mozyat since it cn't really do that. idk #im crazy. Im crazy idek if ill make any of these

[maskyartist]

*slams hands on table* cloqwork ace attorney au.

#masky says #imma come back to this but i just got my period its my shitty day I GET TO INDULGE #oz would make the perfect edgeworth i mean cmon #emotionally constipated 'unnecessary feelings' he'd be a BITCH in court #qrow as phoenix and ruby as maya here to make sure he doesnt do somethin stupid #summer is mia....yknow why :) #like dont talk to me about the intricacies i just know oscar would be apollo #im replaying duel destinies rn and its makin me think thoughts #so badly want oz telling qrow his returns brought him with unnecessary feelings #'unease...and uncertainty.' ozpin smiles at qrow. that dainty smile he knew from childhood all too well. 'you love to cause a stir dont you #bad luck branwen....its such a good name #TAI IS LARRY THATS ALL THANK U

[dirt-str1der]

Their introductory scene started off so high tension these people do not like each other

#Yakuza liveplay #well im sure mirei is politely disengaged and kiryu is all torn up on the iside about this #i feel scared looking at him #they got rid of his gigantic y3 eyes he looks wrong in that hawaiian shirt #like god you know y5 kiryu does look the most kiryu like that model embodies the spirit of kiryu so well .. miserable .. #stony faced .. like something about it is just perfect and the fact that he never smiled yet is like ... hmm #its really not that i want him to be miserable (i mean i do but i dont) but something about his utter lack of joy #he is not fucking happy

[boxwinebaddie]

i FINALLY had time to read rm 4 and oh my god.. STANS MOM CALLING HIM CUERVO I STARTED TEARING UP UNCLE NINA WHAT THE FUCK. AND KYLE BEING MARRIED TO STAN IN HIS HEAD HOLY SHIT THAT WAS THE CUTEST CHAP YOUVE EVER WRITTEN I THINK. AND HIM DRINKING OUT OF THE THERMOS SO IT TASTED LIKE METAL HOW DO YOU EVEN COME UP WITH THIS STUFF

thank you so much for reading my weird little fanfic, my beloved!!!! also, to answer your last question: i have no idea, i am literally criminally insane, my brain comes up with crazy things, psych ward 5150 grippy sock vacation level plot lines omggg. lock 'er up, boys!!!

but CUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERVOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!

CUERVO NATION!!!! WHO IS UUUUUUUPPPPP!!!!!!

i was hoping someone would catch that!!!! i published my fic and i was vibrating with nervous and excited energy just waiting for someone to drop the word cuervo in my comments section or my inbox so i am SOOOOOO FUCKIN EXCITED OMG!!!!!

( i was sitting on that piece of lore for so long, it was KILLING ME!!! )

bc literally in that entire 16k word chapter...litrally only 1 word actually mattered...and it was cuervo tbh...my son my son my son MI HIJOOO

( also sharon using the masculine o instead of the feminine a and correcting herself...sharon PLEASE KISS ME!!!! tom move over omg )

i remember at first when i was planning out rm i just had raven be stans crimson dawn pseudonym because goth stan in the show was raven...but i am insane i require all of the choices in my fanfictions to mean something, so i couldn't just...have that be his name for no reason...so when i was developing his character and specifically his latino heritage i was like...

....what if i made it his precious childhood nickname?

*wrings my hands like an evil genius*

she also didn't give it to him for no reason, there's a lot of symbolism, with michelle/michi and cat stuff too i'm so...WE'LL GET THERE!!!

but yes....te amooooo cuervo! <3333 besitoooooo baby!

( everyone be so so nice to ravenstan please i love him so so much i hope you guys also really like him im...protective over him omg )

I KNOW KYLE AND STAN BEING MENTALLY MARRIED IS SO SAD AND FUCKING CUTE TO ME!!! and i mean!! technically!!! even tho i didnt write that flashback in little stan did propose to kyle by starks pond with that little pine needle weaved ring w the fresca bottle cap super glued on it so like....idk THATS LEGALLY BINDING TO ME!!!

i'm fucking...like despite the difficulties and hardships they'd face...which would be a lot more than pep!style just bc stan is transmasc, being less white passing than pepstan is by a lot, kyle being jewish and people being fatphobic towards him...OF ALL THE STYLES...THEY HAD THE BEST CHANCE AT BEING HAPPY!!!! THEY WERE IN LOVE AT LIKE 11!!!! KYLE WAS BEING DELULU BUT IF STAN LIVED RIGHT NOW THEY WOULD ACTUALLY MARRIED!!!

sigh sigh sigh sigh sigh

its so sad too because ughhhh kyle was treated so inhumanely because he was overweight growing up ( i know that was a weird plot choice in rm, but there was a reason for it, i think it also makes cartmans character more insidious to me bc of his cruelty and prejudices ) that obviously it shattered his self confidence and had him develop very unhealthy eating habits and body complexes

so now that he is like...actually malnourished and fucking dying, its fucking sick because he was ALWAYS BEAUTIFUL but now that hes 'conventionally attractive' no one will fucking leave him alone...like he gets stopped EVERYWHERE hit on by everyone...so sometimes he just tells people hes "married" and...will occasionally tell people his husbands name is "stan" which......ur delulu baby but i love you

the thermos was so :'( he really misses him so much its so sad i got sad writing that part because everyones like kyle u gotta let go but it fully traumatized him and like??? never getting closure about the love of your life dying is so fucking awful!!!!

like idc that they were 11 like when you Know you Know!!! when you Meet the love of your life you Meet the love of your life!!! your Soulmate is your goddamn Soulmate, okay? and like??? how the fuck are you expected to conduct your life as normal knowing your one true love is DEAD???? in such a violent, fucked up and unpleasant way??? never getting to say goodbye????

uh...cant wait to um...fuck up kyles life by telling him that the hot lead singer of the band that keeps hitting on him is his presumed dead super best future husband...thats gonna be fun haha! whew! FUN!

the fact that he sits there every year....UUUUUUUGH

spain without the s dude...

but i'm so glad you liked that chapter and actually??? Everyone really liked that chapter which AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA YOU GUYS!!!!

when i tell you...of all the updates i've written...pep and rm...i have NEVER been more nervous about uploading a chapter

it's bc the rm universe is so canon divergent and i'm writing a very atypical account of style thats not as easily followed the fandom

and i was worried that the lore would be poorly received, it would be too out there, too long, too boring but

I THINK ITS MY BEST WORK????

like its my favorite chapter ive ever written ( i really love chapter six of peppermint but chpater four of rm...has the energy of pep six...but its sadder...deeper...has the added bonus of stans home life...future ky )

i think the only exceptions to favorite chapters are....

omg so in a little bit...there is an rm chapter...that is my favorite outline for a chapter ever...since i started writing rm i have been WAITING to post it...id say ill tell u when you're there but you'll know...honestly after this chapter the next string of rm chapters should be...pretty iconic but THAT PARTICULAR ONE...AAAAAA

there is also one near the very VERY END OF PEP and it was gonna be a oneshot actually but i built this whole fic around it...oh my god...im so EXCITED TO POST THAT ONE...when we get there u will also know....AAAAAAAAAAAA thank u for reading my trash u guys!

like i really...have never felt more nervous about posting something but ultimately i did because i have never felt more confident in ho hard i worked world building and writing something? like i spent so much time making everything so cohesive, making sure every part of the canon, eveyr line of dialogue, every word made the fanfiction better, gave it depth or would contribute to the plot later...

so the fact that you guys really loved it...i want to cry tbh

i'm glad you guys are enjoying the world that i am building because its very special to me, i qorked very hard on it and as much as i really, really, love pep...i think the intricacies of the rm universe are really fucking awesome and i'm enjoying the dark raunchy macabre psychological thriller mystery romance energy of the rm world aaaa!

-uncle nina, rm super fangirl

ps. i love looove rm, i love talking abt it you can ask me any questions about it any time and i will answer as long as i am not spoiling stuff xx

#CUEEEEEEEEEEERVOOOOOOOOOO #the little cuervo headstanon for raven is like one of my favorite parts of rm bc it gives actual meaning to his stage name and #it also plays into other parts of the fic im really excited to get there a lot of it comes out in that chap im excited abt writing #its why im kinda rushing on 5 because i want to get...over there so badly omg #BUT YES I LOVE JERSEY AND RAVENSTAN BEING MARRIED AS HELL IN KYLES HEAD #and kyle just mourning him like a widow every year under a maple tree taking a picture with his stanley marsh smolder and his polaroid #u know theres just like 6 other polaroids of kyle almost in tears trying to smile pendejo every year on stans bday #stans gonna see those one day and cry a lot i just know it fml #ugh but im so glad u think its my cutest chapter #I AM PASSIONATE ABT RM FOUR LIKE I THINK ITS REALLY REALLY GOOD #i do not talk about my fanfics like that ever but i feel very confident abt rm for bc i think its well done very cohesive and evocative #also i love a flashback u know me #so im glad u liked it and everyone liked it bc...it healed my relationship with writing sm #it was so freeing to write something that i loved and have it loved right back....i love u guys on that note

[todayisafridaynight]

tsutsumi gotta be the funniest choice to play sawashiro since he really does encapsulate his casting career of both action roles and being dad of the year (most of the time)

#snap chats #ill stop posting about this after tonight i prommy #sawashiro doesnt even register as a guy played by him though since sawashiro never smiles #yet the past like three things ive watched with tsutsumi he smiles SO much bless his soul #'dad of the year (sometimes)' is such a funny type to have #like 2/3 of material he's in he's a phenomenal father No Notes #and then the other few times its like. He's Still A Phenomenal Father but he's fumbling a bit for one reason or another #its so interesting tho Of Course I Peaked At The Bio he wanted to pursue mostly action roles #yet ended up playing mostly sensitive/emotional roles #he does it very well Might I Add he does a great job #his dad cast type is Pathetic Father Trying His Best and it shows its so funny #anyway ill try to focus on strictly rgg posting after this one i just needa ramble bout this somewhere cause it makea me laugh #im hangin out with my friend in like twenty mins and i wont be online until like tomorrow #so.... who wanna send me funny stuff to get to in the morn <3 #ok forty minutes. im seeing her in forty minutes. #i need more punctual people in my circle first my family now my dorm mates 😭 #anyway bye i gotta finish a comm but then i might be cringe and doodle jo later #as if i can finish a com in half an hour and have time to do a sketch good lord