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POV you got out of bed and took a shower
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This has been in my mind lately.
It can be lonely to love and be loved my a deity.
Now, please do not misunderstand me, I am thankful and joyful about it. However... I hate the physical loneliness.
I want to hold them, I want my family to know them and realize how wonderful they're, I want to hang out, to eat together, to be held. But I knew that wasn't possible, and that's alright, I chose to love them still, it just feels too much sometimes, clair senses can be tiring.
After all I'm still human, and I'm still flesh.
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Really wish I didn't constantly get stuck in the mindset of feeling like I have to post content and that it's okay if I don't. I don't owe anybody anything. Especially when there's days where I'm staring at photoshop like it's trying to kill me :/
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films from the 70s about middle-aged men facing their own mortality and clinging to their friendship and reverting to little kids and not wanting to go home and not knowing what they're supposed to be feeling, my beloveds
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I haven't even finished smoking this joint yet but I can already feel that I need another one
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Kid: it's cool for you that you're an adult who likes videogames. You can play whatever you want how much you want
Me: True, but also when I want to play a game until 4am I'm the only one who has to stop myself, because i also have work in the morning
Kid: ...i guess my dad has an important job...
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if only simon riley were real so he could choke me out with his thighs
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I'm gonna go home, I'm gonna finish my 16.6 FIX-IT fic, I'm gonna watch 15.10 to soothe my soul, then I'm gonna cry myself to sleep
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*goes outside* maybe there is hope actually
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It's been one of those days man...
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My zucchini, about me: This is Jesker. They have to wear headphones blasting music all the time, otherwise they will start committing war crimes.
Me, who can't hear shit, in my head: You can break a shovel when you break new ground, you dig dirt up when you dig deep down. You should know better than that by now, it's not profound to–
My zucchini: anyways, aren't they adorable?
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I woke up with a migraine that hasn't gone away all day, I'm fresh out of the only painkiller that works for me, I got sniped on an art auction at literally the last minute 2:59, I got stuck in drawbridge traffic on the way to work because some rich asshole would rather inconvenience hundreds of poor people at rush hour than sail a few miles to a higher bridge, the publix deli didn't have ANY of the stuff I wanted so now I don't get to eat dinner until after I get off work at 10pm and have to either settle for McDonalds or a tuna sandwich at home because everything else closes at 7 on this godforsaken rock, there are a ton of late check-ins at work so I have to spend my evening calling people and leaving messages and calling them back until they answer, every time I open social media I am inundated with the most heinous shit I've ever heard no matter how many keywords I block, I feel like I'm on the verge of tears, I'm just so fucking tired...
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