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Darren Criss received the Ted Arison Young Artist Award from Americans for the Arts at the annual National Arts Awards 2022 | Presented to an individual who has achieved incredible accomplishments and exemplary leadership while still early in their career
The first Thursday of every month is one of my favorite events in the city—San Francisco First Thursdays art walk. The art walks in the Tenderloin and downtown area have changed a lot over the years, but the current incarnation makes me feel most at home in my neighborhood.
Low Key
For the July round of First Thursdays, I started over at Low Key Skate shop (and art gallery) on 679 Geary Street. I’m constantly telling people about this little gem off Geary and Leavenworth. It’s impossible to miss—all their openings have a great group of people hanging out front and skating. Their show that is up through this month is titled “Friends we made along the way”, and does this show contain some fantastic paintings!
Mary Claire Amable’s “Welcome Home” series are some carefully crafted watercolor paintings. “Welcome Home 2�� is a miniature wall menu which hangs in the Tenderloin treasure Saigon Sandwich. (You can’t go wrong with any of their sandwiches, I personally usually get the Combo with extra peppers). The use of color is fantastic, the small blemishes on the sign really pull you into the shop.
A little further down the wall is one of my personal favorites of the night by Streetchilli, who also curated the show at Low Key. The painting is titled “Stressed out”, after Houston pioneer DJ Screw’s tape. (you can listen to it for free here. The red rug flows into the green and purple brick wall, with a portrait of someone pulling the skin off their face to reveal the muscles underneath in a way that reminds me a bit of Edvard Munch. On the coffee table rests the DJ Screw tape in it’s 2019 vinyl release form, and I really love how this was simplified for the painting by Streetchilli. Looks like someone is getting a call from the yellow comic-like exclamation points rising from the cell on the table; my ash tray is never that clean.
Speaking of Hip Hop legends, how about this piece by Misael Marin, “Dice of Life”, a reference to a song by San Francisco native Andre Nickatina on his album Conversation with a Devil. This was one of the first songs and the first albums I had heard from Andre Nickatina. “This for the ones that hate that I'm high, when you see me, it's no surprise, tap your brain and blow your mind.” In a lot of ways this painting, and this song, speaks across the room to the painting by Streetchilli and the music of DJ Screw. “Dice of Life” ends with a sample that says “This life of ours, this is a wonderful life. If you can get through life like this and get away with it, hey that's great, but it's very, unpredictable. There are so many ways you can screw it up.”
Soft Times
Next up and around the corner is Soft Times Gallery. Walk up 2 blocks from Geary and Leavenworth to Sutter and you’re there! 905 Sutter St. “Rare Candy” is the name of the exhibition, and as always Soft Times has put together some really fun sculptural works mixed with paintings. AND THE COLOR!
First up is work by Reniel Del Rosario: ceramic sculptures of glass bottles, cigarettes, lighters, cigars, fingers, blunt wraps, vapes, joints, lighters, and shot glasses, laid out like the aftermath of a party. The bottles have names like “A good Nights Rest”, “Flappy”, “Reliever”, “Renny’s Rasberry Razzle Dazzle”, and “Big Boy”. The painting above by Kyle Dunn is titled “Tailspin" and is a linear barage of color, like a glitched TV abstraction.
Across the room is a mysterious magical painting by Neddie Bakula titled “Casting Spells” featuring descending or ascending figures in a desert divided by a never ending wall, witches with hovering orbs, the moon, the sun peaking off behind the horizon, a beautiful bright pink hue popping up throughout the piece.
At the other end next to the windows is a mixed media on foam piece by Raen Barnsley called “Moss and bits and fluff”, which gives me a very 80’s / 90’s aesthetic mixed with contemporary sculpture practices. The texture of the foam really does look like moss, with an icing like little rectangle with squigglies on top. Next to it is a glowing sunset feeling textile piece by Jessy Lu, “Soft Screen I”.
Moth Belly
Last stop of the night—my favorite gallery in the Tenderloin, a place that feels like my home away from home, Moth Belly Gallery, located at 912 Larkin (Larkin and Geary). If you haven’t been to Moth Belly yet, come on down and say hello! They also run an exceptional publication “Moth Belly Media” that has been doing a lot of interviews recently.
The exhibition this month at Moth Belly is simply titled “7”, featuring 7 artists.
When walking in you’re immediately greeted by some stencil paintings of someone you may recognize if you spend a little time walking through the Tenderloin—Looksnatcher. With another Texas shout out in the center, Luanne from King of the Hill! Next to that is another one of my favorite paintings of the night titled “Papa Cannibal” which feels like both a nod to Bacon’s “Study after Velázquez's Portrait of Pope Innocent X” as well as Goya (and Rubens) “Saturn Devouring His Son”. I would be remiss if I didn’t point out the trippy and wonderful three headed tribute to Dolly Parton. There’s also another great shout out hidden in here, but I’ll let you come to the gallery to learn more about it yourself.
There is some work on scratchboard in the back by Natalie McKean that completely blew me away. If you’re not familiar with scratchboard, while it looks like a drawing on a black background, the image is actually scratched into the surface with sharp tools, carving out the light. The piece “Knowing Your Demons” features a person being watched through a magic orb surrounded by salivating demons that look like a mix between Maurice Sendak’s “Where the Wild Things Are” and “Hellraiser”. The detail is just, I mean, well, look at it!
And that wraps up this Thursday Tenderloin Tour! Thanks for walking with me on such a beautiful night.
Happy threeloween epithet erased fans, and today for the spookiest day of the year (November 1st) I went and created more madness! like always @tearah04 supplied the design. The theme of this outfit was "what if navens otherworld form was more over the top"
The outside of the outfit (the white and gold) is completely hand embroidered! The outfit took approximately 140 hours to make!
A vast majority of the time went into the embroidery. Ive always found hand embroidery much more expressive than machine embroidery. After visiting the Guo Pei exhibit in San Francisco I was inspired to finally make an outfit that focused on embroidery. For a character like naven that personal touch felt necessary. For this outfit I tried a specific form of embroidery called goldwork. As the name implies gold threads are used but unlike many other styles there Is a focus on different sizes of thread. I also dyed the lining rainbow and added the pearls to really make the outfit pop.
Artwork by the wonderful @tearah04
A huge thanks to my friend Daniel for being my photographer and putting up with my picky-ness and again, massive thanks to lu for designing this outfit. You two are life savers.
A bit of an announcement, I'm cautiously opening costume commissions, if you're interested please dm me! (Preferably on Instagram or discord since I actually check those) I'm still working out the details so please be patient.
Ficámos um total de 5 dias na Golden City, San Fran, the City by the Bay, Frisco, the Paris of the West, com todas as alcunhas ao nível desta cidade bem cool.
E não só cool da vibe que transmite mas também das temperaturas, que são bastante chilly, sobretudo depois dos desertos, com um nevoeiro quase constante, tão habitual que os são franciscanos o apelidaram de Karl, the fog.
São Francisco é de facto especial, com a icónica Golden Gate Bridge (que só conseguimos ver em 2 dos 5 dias quando o Karl deu tréguas), os típicos elétricos, as casas vitorianas coloridas, as ruas com inclinação +++ (de causar síndrome de atrito do tensor da fáscia lata a qualquer um que se atreva a subi-las - momento nerd, desculpa Pe), a famosa rua aos S Lombard Street, a baía com vista para Alcatraz, a Chinatown, a Japantown, o Mission District com a prevalente comunidade hispânica e os seus fantásticos murais, o Haight com as influências hippies dos anos 60, as ruas de Castro por onde se marcharam pelos direitos civis da comunidade LGBT e o melhor de tudo, uma forte adoração pela gastronomia e dedicação à arte da restauração, aspecto ainda não encontrado em nenhum outro sítio durante a viagem.
Adorámos mesmo esta cidade eclética e gostámos muito da comidinha, o famoso clam showder e as comidas asiáticas que comemos no bairro de Japantown onde estávamos hospedados no belíssimo hotel Majestic.
O nosso quarto, só tenho pena de não ter tirado fotografia a banheira de pés da nossa casa-de-banho majestosa.
Exemplos do Kiko contente por estarmos a comer bem em San Fran.
De destacar em São Francisco:
Fomos ver a restauração em 4k do icónico filme "Thelma & Louise" no não tão menos icónico cinema Castro Theatre. Foi uma experiência deliciosa ver numa sala tão bonita como aquela e repleta de cinéfilos que reagiam entusiasticamente a todas as piadas e cenas épicas do filme.
Fomos visitar a célebre prisão na ilha Alcatraz e foi muito interessante ouvir relatado pelos próprios prisioneiros e pelos guardas da altura como era a vida naquela prisão de alta segurança. O the Rock, como lhe chamavam, para onde eram enviados os mais terríveis criminosos, incluindo os que já tinham feito tentativas de fuga noutras prisões. A experiência incluí entrar dentro das minúsculas celas individuais e ainda mais aterrorizador nas celas da solitária, onde eram mantidos às escuras por dias, semanas e meses os que desobedeciam às regras da prisão. Ficámos também a saber das histórias das tentativas de fuga daquela que era considerada a prisão impossível de fugir, apenas 3 de 27 bem sucedidas, embora o paradeiro desses 3 nunca tenha sido descoberto e seja presumido que morreram afogados no barco que construíram com casacos de chuva que roubaram da lavandaria (fica a dica para verem o filme Escape from Alcatraz que conta a história destes 3 malandros que ficaram para a história que foram os únicos que conseguiram, sem ser detectados, chegar pelo menos às águas gélidas que circundam a ilha e de como executaram a brilhante fuga).
Mudança de planos, aqui no blog e na viagem.
Tínhamos inicialmente planeado visitar a ilha de Maui, no Hawaii, a seguir a São Francisco, plano que decidimos abortar pelos terríveis wildfires da região de Lahaina.
Decidimos então alugar um carro e nos 5 dias em que lá estaríamos descemos a costa de São Francisco até LA, onde passamos por Santa Cruz, Monterey, Carmel-by-the-Sea, fizemos o Big Sur, ficamos em Santa Barbara e terminámos em Malibu e Venice Beach, novamente - trajecto que vos ia contar já hoje mas entretanto o homem já acordou e está na altura de ir visitar Oahu.
Fica aqui prometido então às 4 pessoas que estão a ler isto que voltarei para vos falar deste trecho da viagem e das duas semanas nas duas ilhas paradisíacas do Hawaii.
@dogslosing sent 📷 for a post of your muse on my muse's instagram
theodore hughes shared a photo of dylan monroe ; taken the night before her birthday . coming back from the bar and he just surprises her with balloons cause he's that type of stupid boyfriend ... and of course he had to snap a photo of her looking annoyed by it just to post at midnight .
ayla wellington shared a photo of brodie casmir bates . when they go back to san francisco for a trip or something and she can finally show him around the museums she loves the most . just dragging him through every hall and yapping about her favorite pieces and then just sitting down and kissing him up when they're tired of walking around .
milo sykes shared a photo of mina lu , taken before a party in the elevator . he's stupid ass would be telling her to pose so he can make good photos for her instagram but they mostly end up bad cause he sucks at it and can't stop talking in between shots ... and he might be too drunk lbr . but he'd just have way too many pictures of her on his phone and always be posting her on his social media cause even he can't believe he scored that .
I cannot sleep and I just read the most idiotic thing on Twitter so let’s make fun of it together.
There is an article about a (in my opinion) quite blatant attempt by Chinese-American political candidates in San Francisco to prevent non-Chinese candidates from appealing to the city’s Chinese speaking voters. And they are using “cultural appropriation” as an excuse to get their way.
“After an inquiry from Supervisor Connie Chan, the Department of Elections has decided to follow a 2019 state law saying self-submitted Chinese names may only be used if candidates can prove that they were born with them, as many Chinese immigrants or Chinese Americans were, or they have been using the names for at least two years.
If that’s not the case, candidates will then be given a transliteration-based name, which are often wordy and based on Mandarin phonetics.
As San Francisco is heading into an election season, the rule change may be considered a crackdown of sorts. Because of the city’s robust Chinese-speaking population, ballots are in both English and Chinese, which has led many non-Chinese candidates to adopt a Chinese name in an effort to appeal to monolingual Chinese voters.
For example, mayoral candidate Daniel Lurie, a first-time runner in politics, recently named himself 羅瑞德, and the name is widely publicized in the Chinese-speaking world. But if he can’t prove that he was born with the name or has been using it for two years, he will likely be assigned a name, 丹尼爾·露里.”
Anyone who knows anything about contemporary Chinese speech habits would know that Chinese people find “nicknames” in Chinese A LOT easier to remember and pronounce than direct transliterations of non-Chinese names. And if a non-Chinese celebrity doesn’t have an “official” Chinese nickname, Chinese people will make one up for them!
Non-Chinese people self selecting new Chinese names (usually creatively inspired by their original names) is not cultural appropriation! It’s just a way for the person to make it easier for people to pronounce and remember their name! Lots of Chinese people also adopt English names for similar reasons. People just want their names to be remembered and not butchered on a regular basis. And sometimes that requires creative translation or a brand new name in the target language!
Also, Daniel Lurie’s self-chosen Chinese name absolutely SLAPS in Chinese. While the literal transliteration sucks. Let’s break it down:
The “nickname”, 羅瑞德, is pronounced Luo Rei De in Chinese. Luo Rei sounds like Lurie, his last name, and De is the first syllable of his first name. But it gets even better. This version of his name follows the Chinese last-name-before-first-name rule, since it puts Lurie before Daniel. Plus, Luo is a fairly common Chinese surname, so to native Chinese ears, the name sounds like surname Luo, given name Rei De, which sounds “natural.” And to top it all off, the characters Rei and De combine together to make yet another fairly common Chinese given name! Rei means “intelligent” and “De” means “moral”, both auspicious characters that are frequently combined together in given names for boys! Rei is rather gender neutral but De is much more common in boys, thus also clearly marking the gender of the person. So in conclusion, Daniel Lurie’s Chinese “nickname” manages to remain true to his original English name AND sound fantastic and easy to remember in Chinese.
Now let’s look at the literal transliteration they wanted to assign him: 丹尼爾·露里
This is pronounced Dan Ni Er, Lu Li. Yes, it does sound almost exactly like “Daniel Lurie”. But what does this name mean in Chinese? Let me translate: Dan = pill 💊, Ni=woman, Er= a grammatical term with no meaning, Lu = Dew, Li = inside. We went from “Luo the intelligent and virtuous” to a nonsensical combination of words! And remember that Chinese names are usually 2-3 syllables. A 5 syllable name creates way more mental friction for a native speaker to read, say, and remember. If Daniel Lurie actually had to use this transliteration, it wouldn’t take long for his mandarin-speaking supporters to start affectionately calling him something like 丹��力 “Dan the hardworking” (pronounced Dan Nu Li). I made this one up on the spot, based on the tendency of Chinese netizens to take the first syllable of any foreign name and make it the “last name” and then assigning a 2-syllable “given name” that describes some a trait they associate with that person and vaguely sounds like other parts of the person’s foreign name.
So the people trying to ban self-selected Chinese names either don’t know how Chinese native speakers prefer to interact with foreign names or know all too well the importance of having a good Chinese “nickname” and are trying to sabotage their political opponents’ chances.
Getting out of the country had been the best option for Luther after everything went down in San Francisco. He found himself in Edinburgh, trying to start over again, and for the most part, he'd been doing well... until he'd had a strange encounter with someone - or something - on the street one night. He was attacked by someone he barely saw. They were fast and strong, even stronger than him, despite being slighter in stature. Hours later, he woke in an alley, weak and sore all over, and suddenly unable to take more than a few quick seconds of sunlight without burning terribly. Over the next few days, the harsh reality of what he was slowly came into focus. As ludicrous as it seemed to him, he was now a vampire.
For months, he'd been trying to survive, battling sensory overload, intense cravings for blood, and trying to find employment where he could exclusively work night shifts. Luther didn't want to hurt anyone, but he needed to feed. If he didn't, the cravings took over, and he found himself controlled by a frenzied bloodlust. Determined to stay in control of himself, Luther began seeking out people who weren't exactly the best of society. Lowlifes of various kinds became his regular meals. Still, he hated it. The only bright spot in all his horror and confusion had been the woman who'd moved into into his apartment building, down the hall from him.
She was a secretive sort, didn't share much about herself, but Luther took a liking to her almost immediately. Wanda was her name. He even thought that, despite that she didn't seem to really want to talk to too many people, they were getting along fairly well. She was hiding from the authorities, just like he was, so they had some hings in common. He began to really look forward to talking to her almost every day. Until... everything changed for him. He pulled away from her then, afraid of what she would think and of what he might do to her. Luther just didn't trust himself anymore.
She was persistent, though, and one night she'd accosted him to ask him why he'd been ghosting her all of a sudden. Backed into a conversational corner, Luther knew he'd have to either get rude with her and tell her to leave him alone, or... tell her the truth. He opted for the truth. Understandably, it was difficult for her to believe, but after seeing the difference in is eyes and the sharp fangs he now possessed, she seemed to take him a bit seriously. Still, he wanted to keep her safe, so he told her that staying away was the best thing.
Except... she didn't seem to want him to stay away. He'd liked her, a lot, he told her, but he couldn't very well be with her now that he was... well, even more of a monster than he'd been when he was human. He'd had to kill to survive, so how could she want to be with someone like that? That was when something shocking came out of her mouth. She wanted him to... bite... her?
"Wanda... I can't do that. You don't understand what that means. I'm not gonna treat you like lunch. You're not like those other people I feed from. I wanna keep you safe," he pleaded with her. "You don't wanna be what I am, trust me. And I don't wanna hurt you." He never felt more like a monster than now, actually talking about biting this amazing woman he'd really come to care about...
꒰⠀⠀⠀⠀brianne tju. twenty-five. non-binary. they/them.⠀⠀⠀⠀꒱ hold your f*** horses ! delaney lu has just been spotted walking into revolution headquarters. they are best known for being the drummer in kalopsia and have been signed with the label for two years. they share a lot of interesting things about life in the music industry on their social media, so make sure you don’t forget to follow them at @laneboylu. fans know them for being goofy but i swear they’ve got a tenderhearted side as well. maybe that explains why they’re always associated with winning prizes twice their size playing carnival games, lazy smiles in a haze of heady smoke, & finally falling asleep while the rest of the city wakes up. stan twitter even voted them most likely to get taco bell with fans after a show. we’ll see how they live up to that reputation.
[ learning disabilities tw, drugs references tw throughout bio & wc ]
delaney lu – where to begin? the second child of the incomparable mei lu, star of the stage and screen. okay, star of one soap opera that lasted five years in the late '80s - early '90s. in reality, a good actress who decided she hated los angeles and moved back home to san francisco when the show imploded and abruptly ended. soap opera tapings were replaced with leading roles in eccentric local productions and one-of-a-kind one woman shows in historic bay area theatres.
perhaps even more than she committed herself to the stage, mei committed herself to motherhood. she supplied her children with her own surname rather than their fathers' and made it crystal clear that half-siblings were siblings just the same as any other. there was never a doubt in anyone’s mind. their three fathers were never in the picture, but it left mei to run the most camp, free-spirited, and ridiculous household a kid could ask for.
each of the siblings had their own specialty interests (obsessions) and expertise, and delaney's was clear from day one : everything music and making a whole lot of noise. delaney's homemade drumkits went a lot further than pots and pans, but the dream was an actual drum set. it's no wonder they hardly cared about anything else after they got their first real kit. from that day on, they were a neighbor's worst nightmare. and proud of it.
laney's unconventional childhood made them the odd duck out in plenty of life's many facets, but it also taught them to love playing the role of the clown; the fool. book smarts weren't exactly their forte, but high school was good for plenty of other adventures. san francisco was wide and wonderful, and by the time they graduated, they knew the city better than they knew themself. as beautiful as it was, it no longer felt like exploring, and that left delaney with a little bit of an empty feeling.
college was never going to be an option for laney, who insisted their hatred of school was fueled by their disdain for the man rather than their frustration with their learning disabilities. besides, who needs higher education when they've already found their calling? fate brought them to the other members of kalopsia and laney never thought about missing out on college again. since then, they've been living their first and only dream - living for the music. there's a laundry list of things they miss about home, but if the truth is simple:
there isn't anything in the world they would trade this life for.
in search of...
the chaos twin: a fellow connoisseur of mischief and anarchy for laney to hatch up insanely dork plans and wild but (mostly) wholesome pranks. a pinch of munchies, a dash of bong rips, and splash of bill and ted create the ultimate partners in crime. a desire to eat popcorn while drama goes down (figurative or literal) is a plus.
opposites attract: an unlikely pair made up of delaney and a much more serious artist (or simply person) in desperate needs of a little letting loose. they probably have a lot more to lose than delaney does, but they still slum it and trip with laney anyway. acid, mushrooms, the strongest weed you've ever smoked... another one of laney's specialties.
strangers in each other's dms: they followed each other on instagram without listening to each other's music or realizing they were in cahoots with the same label. there have been conversations back and forth and a lot of likes mere minutes after posting to their feeds or stories. if anyone expects laney to be graceful about it, they've got bad news coming their way.
an accidental enemy: the road is a crazy place ! people are constantly coming and going from delaney's life, it's impossible to please all of them. that being said, they could've tried a little bit harder with this person. instead, laney managed to piss them off straight to hatred (real or otherwise). but hey, what are the chances they would meet again? whoops ! clearly, higher than they anticipated.
anything under the sun ! : beloved old friends, bitter old friends, parental figures, sibling-like friendships, family friends, tarot reading friends, a "will they, won't they", adrenaline junkie buddies, smoking buddies, one night stands, someone teaching them to cook, someone they're teaching the drums to, and anything else that sounds good !
🫧Soval had just wanted a brief walk before returning to his work at the embassy, it had not been his intention to rekindle things with his old flame.
🫧Translations:
Taluhk- precious
Ashalik- darling
I ashau du. I ashau du heh du losrak me. Du nem-tor t'nash-veh khaf-spol heh t'nash-veh katra k' du heh losrak me wanting. I ma vesh' hollow opi' du losrak me, k'diwa. I vesh' pok tor nem-tor du u' t'nash-veh ko-telsu heh du threw t'nash-veh storilaya pla' svi' t'nash-veh limuk, ni uf dare du leralmin nash nam-tor t'nash-veh lafot lu wuh lafot nam-tor kling's tonk'peh ish-veh?-
I loved you. I loved you and you left me. You took my heart and my katra with you and left me wanting. I have been hollow since you left me, beloved. I was ready to take you as my wife and you threw my advances back in my face, so how dare you say this is my fault when the fault is no one's but yours?
K’diwa- beloved
Dim rays of sun shone down on the Vulcan embassy in San Francisco through the heavy fog. Overcast weather had been the norm since Soval had arrived here on Earth after a brief visit to Vulcan. He could understand how it might bog one down after a while, but for the moment it was a nice reprieve from Vulcan’s scorching summer skies. Small puddles dotted the streets, remnants of last night’s rainstorm. It had been an interesting experience for him, rain on Vulcan was nearly unheard of.
Laughing Human children dashed in front of him as he walked, splashing in the puddles but careful not to muddy the ambassador’s robes. Soval watched them as they went on their way. Children of all races were seemingly predisposed to the same behavior, though Vulcan children tended to prefer sand banks to puddles. Fondly, he remembered his own childhood, now long ago. He couldn’t bring himself to chastise them, he had certainly tracked sand in the entryway of his parents home when he was their age.
Soval continued on his way, taking in the scenes of humans going about their lives. Having lived here as long as he had, he was not as easily irritated as some of his fellow Vulcans. For all their perceived faults, Humans certainly had a way of endearing themselves to you. Returning back to Vulcan had been a bit more of a shock than he had been expecting, he was far more expressive than he had been when he had lived on Vulcan permanently. As much love as he did have for his home planet, Earth was more his home than anywhere else. He knew other Vulcans looked at him like he was an eccentric, but so long as they respected his wisdom and authority, it didn’t bother him.
As he walked, he was greeted by many a friendly face. Sometimes it crossed his mind that he wished he could smile back at them, but not always. Laughter and the sounds of life filled his ears. Tree leaves rustled in the wind and colorful leaves crunched beneath his feet. ‘Fall’ as he had learned it was called, was on its way, bringing with it the promise of the cold kiss of winter.
Between the colored trees, Soval thought he saw a familiar face flit by. He narrowed his eyes and walked a little faster. There they went again, slipping by at the edges of his vision, a woman. How did he know her? He was almost certain he’d seen her before, but who was she? He rounded a corner and she came into view. Her hair blew in the wind, her cheeks tinged pink from the cold. Indignantly, she pulled her scarf up a little higher to shield her face, yet to notice his presence.
But he had noticed her, and now there was no way he could continue without pretending he hadn’t. Her once lustrous hair was streaked with gray, it had been so long. The memory of their last meeting forcibly invaded his mind. She stood at the corner of the street, waiting for something. This was not the place where he had wanted this to occur. It was too late now, she had seen him. At once she seemingly forgot whatever she was waiting for and her eyes widened at the sight of him. For a moment, they were both stock still as they registered what was happening. All at once, she broke the trance with her shrieking voice.
“YOU!”
She stormed towards him, Soval could do nothing but watch. Her hands reached out and grasped the lapels of his robes and dragged him closer.
“How dare you show your face here? How dare you invade my peace with your presence?”
“I do not understand. Y/N, it has been so long, taluhk…”
Rage invaded her gaze that had once been filled with adoration. She shoved him back as hard as she could. They were beginning to attract attention from people as they passed by,
“Don’t you speak to me like that!”
“Y/N, ashalik, people are staring. We should discuss in private.”
For a moment she seemed to come to her senses and glanced around and all the people staring at them. With a reluctant grunt of agreement, she grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him with her. They turned the corner into a small space between buildings and Soval felt himself be shoved up against a wall.
“What do you want from me? Why are you here? Answer me!”
“Again, I do not understand. Have I upset you? It has kept me awake for many nights trying to figure out why you left.”
Her eyes grew unfocused as she processed his words. Soval breathed heavily, the cold wind whistled past them and blew his bangs.
“What makes you think you have the right to say that to me?” There was no anger in her voice now, only confusion and sadness. Soval didn’t, couldn’t understand what was happening. As far as he remembered it had been her who had left him on his own, simply quit her job at the embassy one day with no explanation and left him alone. He hadn’t lied to her, he had spent many nights awake trying to figure out where it all went wrong. In the coming weeks after she left, his home had become a mess, his days unfocused and his nights lonely and wanting. He had all but fallen apart in her absence, but as the days passed and the years went by, he started to recover. But even then, he had never found another woman he’d take as a mate.
“I-I still don’t understand ashayam. What have I done? It was you who left me."
“WHAT?! IT WAS YOU WHO CHASED ME AWAY, DON’T COME CRAWLING BACK TO ME NOW! YOU LOST ANY CLAIM YOU HAD OVER MY HEART YEARS AGO!” Y/N screeched at him, her face once again wild with rage, eyes filled with tears.
Soval’s ears rang and his head spun, what? What was going on? She blamed him? But, she had left one night with no explanation and left him yearning. One day they had been as close as mates, so near to the threshold of finally being together, and the next day she had vanished without a trace.
“I did no such thing. There was no one closer to me than you, and then you left. You gave me no explanation, no warning, you simply vanished from my life and took everything with you. I ashau du. I ashau du heh du losrak me. Du nem-tor t'nash-veh khaf-spol heh t'nash-veh katra k' du heh losrak me wanting. I ma vesh' hollow opi' du losrak me, k'diwa. I vesh' pok tor nem-tor du u' t'nash-veh ko-telsu heh du threw t'nash-veh storilaya pla' svi' t'nash-veh limuk, ni uf dare du leralmin nash nam-tor t'nash-veh lafot lu wuh lafot nam-tor kling's tonk'peh ish-veh?” Soval spit at her, forgetting himself and converting to his mother tongue. As composed as he had been, he felt his emotions creep out beyond the bounds of his control. He had thrown himself from against the wall and gotten into her face, his words formed not with love and care but with hatred and violence.
She stumbled, taken back by the intensity of his emotions. For a moment it seemed as though she might cry, and worry spiraled in his stomach. Just as he was about to reach out for her in an act of comfort, she found her footing and spat back at him with tenfold the intensity.
“Spare me your Vulcan eloquence. Tell it like it is. YOU PUSHED ME AWAY! Left me on my own to pick up the pieces of my heart. I thought you wanted me too, clearly I was mistaken, clearly I underestimated your cruelty and your hatred of us pitiful humans. How could I have been so stupid? To think someone like you would ever stoop so low as to be with someone like me? Tell me why you did it, tell me why I got a transmission from Starfleet command on the night where I finally thought we might become something more, posting me on the other side of the country. Stop stalling. SAY IT IN ENGLISH COWARD, TELL ME WHAT YOU REALLY MEAN!”
Soval breathed deeply, and chose his words carefully. “I did not send you away. Your transfer was completely unknown to me. I was under the impression that you had quit and left because you were disinterested in my advances-”
“Advances? What?” You sounded incredulous, almost like you didn’t believe him. “What are you saying?” You stepped closer, so near now that your chests brushed. Soval could hear your breathing, see the dried tear tracks on your beautiful face.
“I am saying, ashayam, that I love you. I have loved you from the moment we met, there is no one else in the world for me. I can never take another mate, you are the only woman I have ever and will ever pledge myself to. So please, k’diwa, please say you love me too.”
“I love you too.”
-
Before you could get your bearings, begin to comprehend what was happening, you felt the world blur around you. Soval turned you around so you were the one shoved against the wall, his hand cradling your fragile head and taking the brunt of the impact. His breathing was labored, his body tense. The look in his eyes was a mix of intense love, desire, and lust. Having his hand brace you against the wall and his much larger body pressed against yours made your stomach flutter. He had always elicited such feelings in you.
“Do not tease me ashayam, do you mean it?” Soval’s voice was husky, it was clear he was barely containing himself from taking you then and there. The very thought made your heart lurch.
“I mean it.”
Soval’s lips were not harsh against yours. His kiss was tender, inexperienced. Even so, his lips were soft and caressed yours gently. His hand reached up and cupped your face, everything he did he did as softly as he could. You reached up and took his head in your hands, clutching him to you so you would never have to part. It was clear he had never kissed before. You moved your lips against his and he followed. He quickly grew more and more earnest as he learned what he was doing, and forced you harder against the wall and kissed you hungrier.
When you broke apart, you panted and stared at his flushed face. His cheeks were green and his lips were parted, ready to begin again. Soval leaned back in to kiss you again, but you placed your hand on his chest to stop him. At once his face grew serious and he stepped back.
“I am sorry Y/N, I should not have done that, I-”
“Soval, stop. You did nothing wrong, that was the best kiss of my life. And as much as I’d like to do nothing but kiss you until I die, we need to talk about this. We have things to resolve, kissing in an alley won’t solve our miscommunication. But know this, I love you, I want you, and I always have and always will.”
“As do I ashayam. I have died everyday without you, the severing of our bond humbled me more than I can express. I need you Y/N, I fear I can no longer live without you.” In a moment completely devoid of logic, Soval grabbed your waist in desperation and dragged you in for another kiss. You were completely at his mercy, helpless against the sensation of his lips devouring you. He dipped you and pulled your body closer, hiking your leg up to his waist. His sharp Vulcan teeth dug into your lip, careful not to draw blood. You wrapped your arms around his neck and leaned into it. After a long moment, he regrettably released you.
“You are right, we must discuss. Would you prefer my home or your own?”
“Mine.”
-
Soval settled down on your plush couch, your borderline garish home decor was surprisingly aesthetically pleasing to him. The walls of your home were filled, art covered every available surface. A homemade quilt was draped over his legs. In the heat of the moment, the both of you had failed to realize that Soval had been out in the cold for far too long. Upon arriving at your house, you had flown into a fit of worry. He had been trying to hide his shivering from your keen eye, but nothing escaped you. You had thrust him down onto your sofa and smothered him in your throw blanket. He gazed at you as you puttered around in your kitchen, you had insisted on making him tea to quote “warm his insides.” He had tried to explain to no avail that that was not logical, tea did not increase internal temperature, but you had insisted, and he couldn’t bring himself to deny you.
The oriental carpet beneath his feet was patterned in a floral motif, as was the rest of your home. Everything simply screamed you, he noticed some of his gifts to you prominently displayed as well. But what had caught his attention was a framed photo on your side table that you must have forgotten was directly in his line of view. It was a photo of the two of you outside the embassy in summer, you were leaning on his shoulders from behind, a wide smile on your face. In contrast, he looked perfectly put together. Admiral Forrest had taken that photo on the day you were promoted to Captain. The pride radiating from you had been infectious, so much so that he had not bothered to explain to his flabbergasted Vulcan colleagues why he was letting you be so physical with him.
Drawing him out of his pensive trance, you walked in with two steaming mugs of tea. He gladly accepted one. Earth teas were different from Vulcan teas, much more aromatic and flavorful, but he liked them all the same. You took a seat across from him in one of your luxurious armchairs. Leaning back with a sigh, you closed your eyes and tilted your head up to the ceiling. Soval admired the column of your throat and the subtle curve of your jaw. You were truly divine, there was just something about human women that had always enticed Vulcan men. Perhaps it was the fire, Vulcan women tended to be cool and impassive, but human women burned bright with passion. Whatever it was, it had certainly worked on him.
“So,” she began, “I want to know exactly what happened from your point of view.” She snuggled back into her chair, legs tucked gracefully under her, ready to hear what Soval had to say. Brushing a lock of hair from her face, she blinked expectantly at him as he collected himself.
“I had thought I was making my advances quite clear, that you were prepared to reciprocate my affections and bond with me. When you left, I thought it was my feelings that had driven you away, that perhaps I had overstepped my boundaries that night. I have lived every day since trying to figure out what it was that I had done wrong to have you ripped from me.”
Y/N took a deep breath, placing her mug down on the table and running a hand across her forehead. In the dim lighting, Soval could see the gray in her hair, the subtle creases on her face. They had wasted a lot of time. He’d like to kiss her worry lines away, but after his uncontrollable outburst of emotion earlier, he thought a subtle approach might be better for the both of them. He could still see his own teeth marks on her lip.
“I was ready to reciprocate your advances, but I couldn’t tell if they were merely friendly or romantic. I thought you had requested a transfer for me because I had been too open about my feelings that night. I was completely heartbroken at the thought that you’d sent me away.” She rose from her chair and crept over to where Soval was sitting and curled up next to him.
“I have always loved you, and I’d love nothing more than to be your wife, if you’ll still have me.” She placed her hand over his, lacing their fingers together. Soval leaned closer to her, a few more inches and their lips would brush.
“Of course I will have you ashayam. The question, my dear one, is whether or not you will have me?” He said huskily. Her eyelids drooped and her eyes strayed down to his lips, her own parted in want.
“I am yours.”
“Yes, you are, and I am yours.” Soval pressed their lips together fervently. He pushed her down onto the couch and climbed on top of her, intent to take her in mind and body, to finally make her his.
Jonathan Tropper’s TV show Warrior, which premiered on Cinemax in 2019, brings to life a failed pitch Bruce Lee made for a series dramatizing San Francisco’s Tong Wars. Executive-produced by Bruce Lee’s daughter, Shannon Lee, among others, the action-packed serial centers around the exploits of Ah Sahm (Japanese-British Andrew Koji), a Chinese immigrant who becomes a hatchet man for the Tong known as “Hop Wei”. Warrior seems to have earned a modest cult following, especially after HBO Max posted the first two seasons. After I finish each one, I’ll review my favorite episode from each Asian-American director. Among this season’s five directors, two possess Asian heritage, who in total directed three of the 10 episodes.
The Blood and the Sh*t
Airdate: May 3, 2019 (#5)
Director: Kevin Tancharoen
Writer: Kenneth Lin
"Transporting precious cargo via stagecoach through the Sierra Nevada, Ah Sahm and Young Jun (Jason Tobin) are forced to spend the night with three strangers at a frontier saloon in the middle of nowhere. The detour turns perilous when Harlan French (Christiaan Schoombie), a notorious outlaw, shows up with his henchmen, looking for a lucrative payday."
Sending Ah Sahm and Young Jun out of San Francisco for this episode serves the dual purpose of refreshingly changing Season One's pace halfway through, and fleshing out their friendship. Despite the shift to a less urban setting, the episode maintains thematic consistency with the rest of Warrior, through its cynical depiction of anti-Chinese discrimination. With a cast of Asian, Caucasian, and indigenous actors depicting a time of high racial disparity, the template of intimidating strangers winning over skeptics under their protection gains a poignant new layer; although I haven't seen the script's inspiration, The Hateful Eight. Considering the influence of Japanese cinema on Western movies, it almost feels poetic to find an Old West tale boasting a Japanese lead actor. Even though not all of this show's Caucasian characters hate Chinese people, the line between "good white person" and "bad white person" blurs when Harlan quickly shifts from saving Young Jun from castration by Mason (Craig Urbani), to attempting to rob Ah Sahm's and Young Jun's party.
Impulsive Young Jun, long-time Hop Wei member, provides a fascinating contrast to solemn newcomer Ah Sahm, with whom he does share an engaging camaraderie. Young Jun's status as a second-generation immigrant justifies his cynicism, when he laments that his disconnect from his the culture of his father - Hop Wei leader Father Jun (Perry Yung) - makes him feel as out of place among other Chinese people as among Caucasians. Ah Sahm's and Young Jun's varying degrees of familiarity with America even come through during the "anything goes"-style fight scenes, which prove as brutal and engaging as I can expect from Thai-American Kevin Tancharoen. Young Jun mostly fights with weapons, as do other characters assimilated into or born in America. In juxtaposition, Ah Sahm relies on his former home's hand-to-hand combat techniques, yielding additional gruesome results.
Bartender Lu (CS Lee) contributes a distinct Chinese-American perspective on the late 19th century. As a manual laborer who eventually opened up his own business, he makes money through more honest means than Tong members do. However, his backstory teaches that the majority of Caucasians would only respect people of other ethnicities for their own benefit - and even then, not to the extent of paying Lu fairly for his labor. Judging by his statement of rarely receiving Chinese patrons, his current entrepreneurial position still amounts to serving white people for money. Lu does prove that systemic discrimination hasn't rendered him submissive, such as when he and his wife Billie (Erica Wessels) both help protect the bar from the bandits.
Lu's blissful marriage to Billie delivers a necessary depiction of a functional interracial romance. The episode before this one sees Penelope "Penny" Blake (Joanna Vanderham) begin to cheat on Samuel Blake (Christian McKay), the mayor of San Francisco, with Ah Sahm, as reward for saving her life in the second episode. With Lu and Billie, Warrior gains a relatively less sinful example of love transcending racial boundaries.
Young Jun's own love interest in this episode, Native American prostitute Wankeia (Rachel Colwell), likely wouldn't present the most empowering depiction of an indigenous woman; her silence and profession reflecting the Old West's limited education and career opportunities for women of color. On the positive side, Jason Tobin sells the plainly stated notion of Young Jun finding a kindred spirit in another societal outcast, as opposed to simply adoring Wankeia for her physical beauty. During the climax, she also defies the impression that Native Americans in Westerns need non-indigenous people to protect them from selfish Caucasians.
The closest thing I could find to a flaw with this story concerns Harlan's motivations for the second attack on Lu's bar. It doesn't seem like the episode ever explains how he knows exactly what type of "precious cargo" Ah Sahm and Young Jun must transport back to Father Jun. The Western tone and aesthetic convinced me to overlook this, and just enjoy the adventure as an old-fashioned thrill dashed with social commentary. Given the high quality of the performances and set pieces, I can excuse the contrived writing of a one-off baddie. "The Blood and the Sh*t" adds an exciting buffer to Warrior Season One's midpoint, while reinforcing the importance of companionship in a ruthless society.
They Don't Pay Us Enough To Think
Airdate: May 24, 2019 (#8)
Director: Lin Oeding
Writers: Evan Endicott & Josh Stoddard
"After a bloodbath on the streets of Chinatown, the Hop Wei and Long Zii consider a novel way to end hostilities. Ah Toy (Olivia Cheng) and her real-estate business partner, Leonard Patterson (Frank Rautenbach), hit a fork in the road in their effort to buy a valuable piece of land. After promising jobs to Dylan Leary (Dean Jagger)'s Irish workers, Byron Mercer (Graham Hopkins) toasts senator Robert Crestwood (Patrick Baladi) at a fundraiser, while Penny struggles to hold her tongue. Mai Ling (Vietnamese/Chinese-Canadian Dianne Doan) warns her brother, Ah Sahm, against waging a battle he may not win."
The more plot-relevant of the two Warrior episodes discussed here demonstrates the series' captivating exploration of San Francisco's 1870s pecking order. The various ongoing plot lines divide our attention between Chinatown's Tongs and prostitutes, working-class white denizens/citizens, and politically-powerful white citizens. Each of San Francisco's social classes contains people who survive through unscrupulous business, but the Tongs and prostitutes earn the viewers' sympathy as people making the most of desperate situations. When considering the period's patriarchal atmosphere, it feels even more intriguing to see the ruthless lengths that vigilant brothel owner Ah Toy and Long Zii's ladder-climbing Mai Ling will take to accumulate and exert power.
Throughout Season One, most of the Asian actors emphasize their characters' isolation by speaking fluent English among each other, but switching to broken English when addressing Caucasians. When the latter group hears Chinese characters' personal conversations in Chinese, the spoken translations for the audience become reminders of the importance of understanding marginalized perspectives on society. Due to Ah Sahm inheriting some American lineage from his grandfather, Andrew Koji and his writers emphasize Ah Sahm's isolation without resorting to broken English. While he does demonstrate the ability to converse intelligibly with Caucasians, he usually prefers to say nothing at all to them.
Despite Ah Sahm's tendency to disappear for long stretches of this episode, he remains an engaging protagonist. His devotion to the Hop Wei requires him to unquestionably follow orders from Father Jun, yet he still seems in control of his direction in San Francisco. His agreement to duel Long Zii lieutenant Li Yong (Chinese-Indonesian Joe Taslim) comes off at this point as an attempt to ensure himself that despite Mai Ling's rejection in the first episode of his offer to bring her back to China, and Penny's termination in this episode of their affair, he still has purpose in America. He goes so far as to disregard advice to drop out of the life-risking duel, knowing that a loss could both weaken the Hop Wei's hold on the drug trade, and embarrass himself. Through Ah Sahm, Koji and the creatives tackle the task of presenting a protagonist as both dutiful, and proactive.
This episode draws its title from a quote by Bill O'Hara (Kieran Bew), an Irish-American cop assigned with lessening crime in Chinatown. Warrior's attempts to endear him to viewers usually prove ineffective to me; in this particular story, any admiration I would've given him for refusing to support political supporters of the Chinese Exclusion Act feels canceled out by his own act of brutality later on. I have noticed the irony of the oppressed becoming the oppressors, but his plotlines more often than not leave me anxious to resume focus on characters enduring a larger degree of discrimination.
A mixed martial artist and stuntman, Lin Oeding helped provide this episode with thrilling and visually stimulating fight scenes. The opening battle between the Hop Wei and the Long Zii begins this episode in chaotic fashion, as a countless number of gangsters engage in fascinatingly choreographed killings. A later brawl between Ah Sahm and some masked opponents impresses on a more intimate level; between the focus on Ah Sahm's need to survive the unexpected obstacle, and the long takes showing off everyone's skills. Across all of the fight scenes, the total amount of onscreen blood seems to reach a tolerable level: Neither unnaturally low, nor nauseatingly high. The goriest sights of both of these episodes go by very quickly.
Caucasians who engage in systemic racism boast understandable motivations, such as maintaining peace and creating jobs. However, the show doesn't ask the viewers to forgive their bigotry. In this episode, it becomes especially explicit when Penny objects the Chinese Exclusion Act, by attempting to point out hypocrisy of white men banning immigrants from a country that didn't originally belong to them. While this opinion doesn't gain much traction in her patriarchal social circle, her lingering empathy for Ah Sahm helps her to nonviolently demonstrate resilience and a headstrong attitude. Overall, "They Don't Pay Us Enough to Think" successfully provides several compelling perspectives of San Francisco on the brink of the Tong Wars.
Plugs
Special thanks to the Warrior Wiki for helping me keep track of everyone, even though several character pages reveal Season Two plot points right at the top.
Kevin Tancharoen and Kenneth Lin did a fascinating interview about the making of "The Blood and the Sh*t" on the day that it aired.
Violence towards Asian-Americans has reached alarming levels. I would like my readers to donate to The AAPI Community Fund, even if I personally take no share of the funds.
ニックン:Finding The Rainbow(虹を探して)というドラマです。VIUの前作よりはちょっと重いドラマです。1990年代以降の世界で起こったいくつかの悲劇と20年に渡る愛の行く末を扱ってます。僕は20代後半から40代まで演じなきゃいけなくて、チャレンジでした。タイとニューヨークで撮影しました。
Photography Park Jawook Fashion Direction Izwan Abdullah Sittings Editor Sungmin Choi On-set Stylist Hwang Jin joo Fashion Assistant Manfred Lu Hair YANG HYOUNG SHIM(yangyangsalon) Grooming KIM DOH-YEON (yangyangsalon) Production Jeannie Ang
Wisp – “Pandora”
Wisp is the performing name of Natalie R. Lu, a 19-year-old from San Francisco leading a revival of the great 1990s genre of shoegaze. “Pandora” is the the title track from her recently released EP.
Songs of the Week for 2024
January
“Easy Fun” by gglum
“Until Everybody is Free” by Bella Cuts
“Hand to Hand” by Katy Kirby
“Barnyard Disturbance” by Christian McBride & Edgar…
Je ne sais s'il est vraiment très intéressant de lire ou d'aller voir une pièce de Théâtre traitant de cannibalisme comme le fait l’œuvre intitulée "L'Ordinaire" (1981), rédigée par le dramaturge Michel Vinaver et inspirée d'un fait réel (des individus ayant survécu à un accident d'avion dans les Andes se seraient nourris des corps des autres passagers, tués dans le crash). J'ai cependant lu avec passion, à la fin de mon adolescence, une nouvelle de Stephen King traitant d'un sujet similaire. Dans ce court récit, sobrement baptisé "Le Goût de vivre" (1985), un naufragé piégé sur une île austère et minuscule se repaît d'oiseaux marins, de leurs œufs, puis finit par s'alimenter en dévorant son propre corps, se mutilant petit à petit, morceau par morceau.
La consommation de chair humaine ou, plus largement, le cannibalisme, est un thème universel évoqué dans la Mythologie grecque avec l'histoire du dieu Saturne mangeant ses propres enfants par peur qu'ils ne le supplantent, représentée dans un célébrissime tableau de Francisco de Goya appelé "Saturno devorando a un hijo" (1823).
L'idée d'un crime anthropophage doublé d'infanticide se retrouve dans des représentations du châtiment du comte Ugolin, lequel, condamné à mourir de faim après avoir été emmuré dans une tour, subit une forme subtile et cruelle du supplice de Tantale, ayant ét�� incarcéré en compagnie de ses descendants, ses enfants et ses petits-enfants qu'il finit tout bonnement par manger, tel un ogre.
Si je ne me trompe, c'est bien l'âme d'Ugolin qui, dans "La Divine Comédie" (1314) de Dante Alighieri, est très brièvement décrite comme étant un corps humain emprisonné dans de la glace, sous le battement des ailes d'un démon titanesque soufflant un vent épouvantablement froid, la cervelle dévorée encore et encore par un autre grand criminel ; un épisode magnifiquement illustré par le tableau de Gustave Doré "Dante et Virgile dans le Neuvième Cercle de l'Enfer" (1961).
La petite morale atroce que je tire de ces œuvres admirables et admirées est la suivante : l'amour entre les êtres humains, tel que l'on peut le concevoir à l'aube de sa vie - un sentiment pur et idéal - n'existe pas. Car il n'est aucun parent qui, dans la détresse, ne puisse résister à la tentation de tuer ses propres enfants pour survivre, pour prolonger de son existence, fût-ce pour quelques jours seulement.
De cette idée découlent toutes sortes de sinistres conclusions, au caractère désespérant puissamment renforcé par l'idée biblique selon laquelle les générations passées transmettraient à leur descendance l'expiation de leurs fautes et de leurs péchés. Ce qui amène à se poser toutes sortes de questions amères et vénéneuses : "Pour quelle raison hideuse mon père m'a-t-il donné la vie ?" "Pour quel motif abject ma mère n'a-t-elle mis un terme à sa grossesse lorsque j'étais en son ventre ?". Interrogations qui ne surviennent bien sûr que si la naissance du sujet qui se les pose a été souhaitée, et donc préméditée.
Le véritable acte d'amour consisterait donc à ne surtout pas donner la vie, à ne pas transmettre à des enfants innocents un fardeau séculaire incluant tous les meurtres, les vols, les mensonges et autres de nos parents et de nos ancêtres. (Et à qui rétorquerait que la Bible commande malgré tout à l'Humanité de croître et de multiplier, l'on pourrait répondre pieusement et sans malice qu'il s'agit de croître tant en foi qu'en espérance, et de multiplier les fidèles non pas en se reproduisant vilement, mais en répandant simplement la bonne parole.)
Ci-dessous, en guise d'illustration à ces gentilles divagations susceptibles d'instruire certaines personnes encore un petit peu naïves : une planche de l'album de Bande-Dessinée "Opikanoba" (1992) où, dans une scène de cauchemar, une mère alcoolique s'empresse d'accoucher pour dévorer son nouveau-né en l'émasculant à grands coups de dents voraces. L'Homme est un loup pour l'Homme. Chacun pour soi, mais Dieu pour tous.