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gimmethatagustd · 7 months

Note

And here’s the second.

I tried to find the artist, but wasn’t successful. Sorry.

You don't belong in Hell, but you followed Satan there because, well, he's hot.

↳ pairing: satan!namjoon x human!reader (from not today satan)

↳ rating/genre: BTS | 18+ | strangers to lovers | supernatural | crack

↳ wc/date: 1.5k | October 2023

↳ warnings: sexual language and that's it ig??

↳ notes: i'm so unserious lmfaooo. also i was so close to keeping this under 1k and then i gave up cuz i wanted to be stupid. anyway, this is spin-off of "not today, satan"

↳ masterlist / taglist

↳ what was jai listening to? paint the town red - doja cat

PART 1 | PART 2 | Part 3

You shouldn’t be surprised that Satan is hot. He’s the Devil, the king of temptation and all that is evil. Being hot is probably the most crucial part of the job, aside from the eternal damnation and torturing of souls or whatever.

That stuff doesn’t seem as fun, at least not to you, especially since you’ll be one of those tortured souls.

“So, Satan, is that what I’m supposed to call you?” You stare up at the man – demon? Devil! – as he leads you down the winding hallways of what you’ve named the Demon DMV. “Or is there something else you’d like me to call you? Daddy, perhaps?”

As was the case with Hoseok when he brought you into his office for questioning, the walls and ceiling waver and expand to accommodate the ebb and flow of power radiating from Satan. He’s larger than life, with thick thighs and bulging biceps tightening the sleek fabric of his black suit. He’s sharply dressed, and the demon henchmen who flank the two of you on all sides are equally as put-together.

“Silence, pet,” Satan snaps and yanks on your bicep to drag you around a sharp corner. “You will speak when you are spoken to and only then.”

There’s that term again: pet. Hearing it makes your stomach flutter.

“Okay, but that doesn’t answer my question?”

The muscles in Satan’s jaw ripple when he grinds his molars in frustration. You should probably be scared, but he’s so hot! Even with the third eyelid! You wonder if his teeth are as pointy as Hoseok’s. Probably even sharper. Maybe demon fangs are like dicks; the bigger, the better.

“My true name is Namjoon.” It’s a cute name, definitely moanable.

Tilting your head back to smile brightly at Namjoon, you flash your pearly white teeth and bat your eyelashes. “It’s nice to officially meet you, Joonie. I think we’ll get along very well.”

Namjoon nearly trips you when he comes to a halt in front of another black door marked “EMPLOYEES ONLY” in thick gold lettering. This really is the fucking DMV.

“Do not shorten my name,” Namjoon scolds. His slitted eyes glow in the dim hallway lighting, and his dimples hollow his cheeks as he sucks on his teeth.

“Yes sir,” you say with a curt nod. He can’t stop you from calling him Joonie in your head, though. “So, where are we going?”

Positioned around Namjoon, his henchmen ready their stances as though Namjoon’s irritation is physically palpable. There are four of them, all demons, you assume. Their horns resemble Hoseok’s: black and twisted at the ends with strange markings, though each demon’s horns have unique shapes. One of the demons catches you staring at him and gives you a lopsided, boxy grin. The black of his irises bleed into the whites of his eyes. It’s unsettling, but you can’t seem to look away.

The demon henchmen are all hot, too. Is Hell full of hot people? Or is it only the “employees”? You suppose the other dead people you saw in the DMV waiting room weren’t particularly attractive, especially the drowned lady. She was too rude to be hot.

Namjoon smiles at you, his pointy teeth sharp enough to slice through flesh. His fingers dig into your bicep hard enough to be painful, but all you feel is the heat of desire warming your bones.

“We’re going to Hell.”

Hell is kind of stupid.

If Purgatory is the DMV, Hell is the boring suburban neighborhood in which it’s located. You assumed at least Namjoon’s house would be interesting, but he may as well be the CEO of an accounting firm for how plainly expensive Satan’s Palace is. It’s not even gothic – not a single pointy tower in sight. The building is nearly all glass and sits nestled in a gated community, far away from the hustle and bustle of what the boxy-grinned demon refers to as “the Pits” – the slums of this world, where the tortured souls are sent to rot for eternity.

Apparently, even Hell is not immune to the strange minimalism aesthetic that 21st-century late-stage capitalism has created and the class divide that comes with it. How terribly unfortunate.

You follow behind Namjoon as he leads you through the expansive foyer of his home. You never considered where the Devil lives. The only image you ever had in your mind was Satan on a throne of fire and brimstone. Maybe Namjoon has that somewhere in his house.

“Can I ask you a question?”

Namjoon narrows his slitted eyes at you. When his tongue swipes across his bottom lip, you notice that it’s forked just like Hoseok’s. That’s really hot.

“You already have.”

With a roll of your eyes, you cross your arms against your chest. You’re silent for a moment and choose to focus on your surroundings and not on the insufferable demon king. Strange shadows hover in the room's corners and ripple as you pass through to what you think is a living room. The shadows follow you, though they seem to waver when Namjoon looks in their direction. Shaped like human shadows, they walk just as you walk, but they aren’t your own.

To the left sits a grand piano, blood red like the furniture decorating the room. Namjoon plops onto the couch and picks up a small tablet laptop from the coffee table. It feels oddly domestic, and part of you is disappointed that he hasn’t impaled you with a pitchfork yet.

“Well, I’ll ask another,” you announce defiantly from where you stand beside the couch. You aren’t sure if you’re supposed to sit down with Namjoon. What is even going on here?

Namjoon types away on the tablet, pulling up what you recognize is the database of souls that Hoseok used back at Purgatory to figure out how you ended up here in the first place. You certainly haven’t forgotten that you aren’t supposed to be here. You’re not dead!

“If you’re the reason why humans are tempted to sin, why do you punish us when we do?” If Namjoon’s devil powers are why you derive pleasure from reading One Direction serial killer AUs on AO3, then it’s hardly fair that you must go to Hell for it when it’s his fault.

Namjoon pauses his research to lift those hauntingly beautiful glowing eyes to peer up at you. “Because it’s fun.”

“You’re an asshole.”

With an appreciative hum, Namjoon pats the spot next to him on the couch. “Sit, pet. I have something to show you.”

A terrifying energy thrums from Namjoon’s body when you sit beside him. It feels oppressive, like something is sitting on your chest and digging its claws into your sternum. The sensation makes breathing difficult, but you don’t make a sound as Namjoon holds out the laptop. There is a video of you on the screen, sound asleep in your bed at home. Your apartment is dark, with just a hint of pale blue light seeping through the curtains to indicate that dawn is slowly approaching.

“What the fuck is this?” It’s giving stalker, to be honest.

The sound of Namjoon’s snort shouldn’t be hot, but it is. “You are asleep, you idiot.”

You’re asleep.

“So… you mean to tell me this is all fake?”

Namjoon grins with blades for teeth. His tan skin glows with a reddish undertone that compliments the blood-red accents in the room. Something about how the shadows alter his appearance makes you look more deeply at him. Admittedly, most of your time in Namjoon’s presence has been spent staring at his boobs, but now, you’re realizing…

“Oh my god, you’re my fucking neighbor!”

Namjoon’s forked tongue slips from between his lips to curl at the corner of his mouth. Hot air rushes through his nostrils in a loud snort.

“Kinky of you to dream of me as the Devil, isn’t it?” Tossing the laptop to the side, Namjoon leans back and crosses his arms behind his head. His biceps strain against the material of his suit jacket.

Your next-door neighbor, Kim Namjoon, is a total daddy. Quite literally! He has an adorable five-year-old daughter and a little kitten he got for Christmas last year. No mom in the picture, which is sad for the girl but just fine with you because you’ve been fantasizing about the day that you–

“You haven’t even introduced yourself to me in real life yet,” Namjoon rudely points out. He can hear your thoughts because none of this is real.

“Fuck you!” you curse with a stomp of your foot. “I can’t believe we didn’t even fuck or anything. All you’ve done in this dream is annoy me.”

Namjoon shrugs. “It’s your dream. You can do whatever you want.”

PART 1 | PART 2 | PART 3

do not copy, repost, modify, or translate any of my work

#bts x reader #namjoon x reader #bts fanfic #namjoon fanfic #jai writes #gimmethatagustd #mts #jai asks #halloween 2023 #kingarthurscat

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ts1depot · 3 months

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Warning: Avoid Mod the Sims Forums

So, this has got to be the weirdest, most embarrassing turn of events for me, but I had to get this off my chest.

I've been on Mod the Sims forever. It's been the most helpful place I've ever been to in terms of troubleshooting issues, particularly with Create a World. Because of this, I am hugely indebted to the site and the amazing tutorials and advice that still continues to be a treasure trove to this day.

But as of 2024, I can't recommend the forums anymore. It's weird, because in the wake of EA announcing that it was closing the official forums for Sims 3, I was recommending making a jump to Mod the Sims. The reason why is that it has great regulars who are the most knowledgeable of the sims community, and the forum software is great.

However, I wound up with egg on my face. No sooner was I encouraging people to jump to the MTS forums, they became the epicenter of tons of drama because of several troublemakers creating chaos there. I won't go into too much detail about Problem Poster #1, because apparently, it's not politically correct to complain about someone who might genuinely be mentally disabled.

Problem Poster #2 was a straight up psycho, getting triggered because she got a dislike on her posts, which always happens at MTS. (Even the two popular regulars/retired mods at MTS have gotten downvotes.) She then started baiting posters by accusing anyone who disagreed with her about Sims 3 or Paralives as "working for EA/Paralives."

One thing led to another and her posts became increasingly incoherent, practically screaming with rage and throwing out paranoid accusations that people were "watching her", that the forum was full of "jealous bitches" and "whores."

No amount of reassuring her that nothing was going on could calm her down and that everyone gets dislikes. If anything, the more people talked to her, the crazier she got. Naturally, with someone making a spectacle of themselves, this brought even more dislikes (because you know how it goes when someone makes a mountain out of a molehill).

By Day Three of her irrational, crazed rampage, she was cackling about how the dwindling of dislikes was "proof" that blocking people showed that there was a group of "jealous bitches" following her, when the reality is that people had stopped wasting time with dislikes and were just reporting her to get banned. Then she started attacking me, calling me a bitch repeatedly, accusing me of "starting it" and stalking her for three days.

Instead of banning her, the admins at MTS didn't. They merely removed the posts where she went full blown Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs and let her more rational posts stand to just pretend that none of this happened.

Then they allowed her to pretty much remain, with the illusion that she's a pinnacle of the community. But if you see the posts that the admins left standing to make her look rational, you can nevertheless see the signs of when she started to mentally unravel.

This is not even the first time this type of thing has happened, not just to me, but to another poster. I remember there being drama last year when a poster got a temporary suspension for supposedly being racist against Asians, when she was Asian herself.

So, that was it for me. I've been an active member of MTS since 2012, both as someone seeking advice, but also someone wanting to give back to the forum out of gratitude for all the help it had given me. I even gave a shout out to the forum in my latest world and posted links to it from my website. I don't know if the people who own and run the site have changed hands or just stopped giving a fuck in the wake of the pandemic or dwindling visitors and ad revenue, but I won't be posting at MTS anymore and I don't recommend the forums to anyone. When you allow an unhinged person to go off and then "cover their tracks," I can only imagine what other horrible, nasty things that posters have said that were also hidden from view.

#the sims 3 #mod the sims #mts #drama

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