#page 4705

[pesterloglog]

Dave Strider, Rose Lalonde, Kanaya Maryam, Karkat Vantas

Act 6, page 4696-4721

DAVE: hey

ROSE: Sup.

DAVE: anyone seen terezi around

ROSE: No.

ROSE: Why?

DAVE: we were gonna do a thing

DAVE: but shes not around and not answering my messages

DAVE: on any one of the probably ten thousand computers lying around that they would show up on

ROSE: A thing?

DAVE: yes a thing

ROSE: I see.

DAVE: shut up

DAVE: what about you have you seen her

KANAYA: No

KANAYA: Have You Seen Gamzee

DAVE: are you serious

DAVE: of course not

DAVE: i havent seen that guy at all since the first day we got here

DAVE: not once

KANAYA: Yeah

KANAYA: I Know

DAVE: talk about an elusive juggalo

DAVE: probably like the shyest fuckin juggalo of all time

DAVE: im pretty sure only karkats seen him

DAVE: dont expect him to rat him out either because of the "morail" junk

DAVE: moirail?

DAVE: mwah rail...

DAVE: alien words

KANAYA: I Wouldnt Expect Him To

KANAYA: I Wouldnt Even Ask It Would Be Really Bad Form To Ask Him That

DAVE: yeah

DAVE: i mean i bet you think youre imparting some really obscure cultural fact about trolls

DAVE: but really if a human said to another human

DAVE: "hey man can you tell me where your best clown friend is hiding so i can go chainsaw him to death"

DAVE: just fyi that would probably be bad form too

KANAYA: Okay

DAVE: i dunno its been a year already i think hes really intent on hiding

DAVE: and hanging on to those dead bodies

DAVE: hes probably scared to death of you at this point anyway

DAVE: maybe you should just let it go

KANAYA: Hmm

DAVE: rose back me up

ROSE: I try to stay out of troll interpersonal politics.

DAVE: interpersonal

DAVE: wait

DAVE: are you saying this is like

DAVE: a spade quadrant thing

DAVE: is she trying to be his kismet fish

ROSE: I'm saying no such thing!

DAVE: well if she hates him isnt that what that means

ROSE: Dave, don't be a dick. You're embarrassing her.

DAVE: haha no im not shes cool

DAVE: look shes being cool about it

KANAYA: Im Being Cool About It

DAVE: see????

KANAYA: Its Not Like That

KANAYA: I Just Want To Find Him

KANAYA: And

KANAYA: At Least Wound Him Somewhat

DAVE: yeah see i knew there had to be a perfectly harmless and unerotic explanation

ROSE: (shh!)

KANAYA: No

KANAYA: See Im Explaining This Badly

KANAYA: All Im Saying Is Basically

KANAYA: Just

KANAYA: Fuck That Guy

DAVE: got it

DAVE: so what are you up to in here

DAVE: whats with all these books

ROSE: Research.

ROSE: We're trying to put all the pieces of the puzzle together.

ROSE: You are aware this meteor has many secret rooms scattered throughout, including libraries, right?

DAVE: hell yeah

DAVE: we looted one of them for the can town project

ROSE: Can Town?

DAVE: i told you about can town didnt i

ROSE: No??

DAVE: well

DAVE: the thing about can town

DAVE: and all there really is to say about can town is

DAVE: its awesome

DAVE: the end???

ROSE: Wow.

ROSE: What a story.

DAVE: fu

DAVE: so

DAVE: what is the point of this research

ROSE: Primarily to gain a more thorough understanding of the situation we'll be entering when we arrive.

DAVE: i thought you pretty much already knew the situation

DAVE: since you can see the future

ROSE: Oh my God.

ROSE: I've told you. I can't see the future!

DAVE: yes you can

DAVE: you totally can

ROSE: Ok. But not all of it. Only certain relevant pieces.

ROSE: It's a bit frustrating when people make that presumption about you.

ROSE: For instance, you are a Knight of Time. Since you have such mastery over time, doesn't that mean you should know everything about the future too?

DAVE: no thats totally dumb

DAVE: i could know things about the future if i time traveled and found out first hand

DAVE: nobodys mistaking that about me im a time traveler not a fuckin fortune teller its simple as shit

ROSE: Right. So there are significant limitations on what you can know, governed by certain rules.

ROSE: That's how it is for a Seer too.

DAVE: ok whatever

ROSE: But I will say that I have been able to use these abilities to assist with research.

ROSE: I can treat my finite glimpses as an additional source of information.

ROSE: If you combine that with the knowledge we've gathered from these texts, and things we've learned from our various encounters with the deceased, with a bit of inference and deduction, a more detailed picture is coming into focus.

DAVE: nice

ROSE: Do you want to hear about it?

DAVE: uh

DAVE: now?

ROSE: Yes.

ROSE: Why not? It's been a year.

ROSE: It seems like all we've done on this trip so far is indulge in lavish interior decoration projects and screw around with mysterious "Can Town" initiatives, which may or may not be consuming valuable library resources as building materials.

ROSE: We could make at least some effort to squeeze in annual briefings on our objective.

DAVE: yeah that would be pretty legit of us

ROSE: I think you'll find that when it comes to striving for a reasonable approximation of legitimacy, we are simply the most barely adequate there is.

DAVE: ok i didnt really catch any of that bullshit cause i wasnt listening

DAVE: im gonna make myself a cup of coffee and get primed to listen to you saying a lot of stuff like that

DAVE: do you want some

ROSE: Um. Sure.

DAVE: kanaya?

KANAYA: No Thank You

DAVE: ok

DAVE: ...

DAVE: this fuckin thing

DAVE: where did you even unearth this piece of shit from

DAVE: oh ok there it goes

DAVE: two hot revitalizing cups of shitty coffee

DAVE: fresh out of the weird pod

DAVE: why do we even drink this shit

DAVE: i guess just cause this thing is here

DAVE: like somehow the temptation is even stronger because the coffee sucks?

DAVE: dunno how the fuck that works

DAVE: wish there was such a thing as apple juice on troll world

DAVE: could go for a bottle of aj

DAVE: i wonder if theres any booze squirreled away on this meteor

DAVE: kinda feels like we should be drinking our asses off here

DAVE: no adults nothing to do

DAVE: thats what you do without adults right

DAVE: get wasted all the time?

DAVE: wait what the fuck am i saying trolls dont even have adults

DAVE: well they do

DAVE: but theyre all in outer space being insane badasses

DAVE: i guess they do have the stupid nanny monsters

DAVE: do the monsters give a shit if they get wasted

ROSE: Are you talking to us?

DAVE: what

ROSE: We can't even hear you mumbling over there.

DAVE: oh

ROSE: How's that coffee coming?

DAVE: off the shit is how

DAVE: all being like

DAVE: in cups and everything

ROSE: Be sure it makes it to the table before it accumulates that strange unctuous film on the surface.

DAVE: so whats with the big book youre writing in

DAVE: is that more wizard fan fiction

ROSE: No, it's something like an extensive journal.

ROSE: I'm recording everything we've been through so far, and detailed notes on everything we know about the game.

ROSE: I'm also using it to document our research, and extrapolate on the new session and players.

DAVE: so its like

DAVE: your nigh unreadable gamefaq

DAVE: in tome form

ROSE: Somewhat.

DAVE: you sure like to write big game guides

ROSE: I don't look at it that way.

ROSE: I'm approaching it from a standpoint of responsible historical documentation.

ROSE: Don't you think people in the future will want to know about our story?

DAVE: i guess

ROSE: I think it could be a very useful resource some day.

ROSE: It could be helpful to others beginning their own quests.

DAVE: ehh

DAVE: chances of that seem pretty remote

KANAYA: I Really Wouldnt Rule It Out

DAVE: ok totally sold on that suddenly

DAVE: on account of not caring

DAVE: so tell me about the new session

DAVE: what is there to know

DAVE: and most importantly

DAVE: how is everything going to go wrong this time

ROSE: From what I understand, everything already has gone wrong before the game even started, in many different ways than ours did.

ROSE: There are indications of thicker political intrigue. Assassination attempts. And a usurpation of the throne more insidious than what we dealt with.

ROSE: But those examples still don't illustrate the fundamental fault with their session.

ROSE: Ours had a similar fault. It was a null session.

ROSE: Literature on the subject says null sessions are actually very common.

ROSE: It is any session resulting in failure, and as such, designed to result in failure from the start, due to Skaia's comprehensive "knowledge" of its own fate, and that of all it illumines.

ROSE: Biologically speaking, it's to be expected that null sessions far outnumber the successful ones. When it comes to reproductive systems, overwhelming redundancy is commonplace.

ROSE: A universe has a reproductive system that spreads many seeds, as it were, most of which never come to fruition. So we shouldn't feel too bad about our results, really. It was quite par for the course.

ROSE: But then, it would also seem that exceedingly few null sessions result in the birth of a massive green star fueled by two dead universes. For what it's worth.

DAVE: ok but i thought the whole point of this

DAVE: the scratch thing

DAVE: is it gave us a chance to still win

DAVE: but youre saying the new session has a fault too?

ROSE: Well, yes. There's more to it though.

ROSE: The new session is essentially our session, rebooted with different parameters which also affected the original conditions of our universe.

ROSE: And strangely, it seems the new one is a null session as well, but within a much less common subset of all null sessions.

ROSE: This one is referred to as a void session.

DAVE: ok

DAVE: which is what

ROSE: It's very simply a session in which nothing is prototyped before entry, at all.

ROSE: Hence, by Skaia's preemptive all-knowing and its influence on the rest of the incipisphere, there are not even any towers on Prospit or Derse built to receive the split kernels.

ROSE: See?

DAVE: weird

DAVE: why would these alt universe players fuck up in such an obvious and stupid way

ROSE: I don't know what specifically led to the failure to prototype anything.

ROSE: But it doesn't really matter. As I said, the session was designed this way before they began playing. Any efforts to prototype may have been in vain regardless. Possibly subject to sabotage.

DAVE: didnt you say at some point that not prototyping anything would be really bad

ROSE: Yes.

ROSE: It's just another way to create an infertile session. Though by a less catastrophic and bloody route we took to achieve the same result.

ROSE: By contrast, it leads to a rather harmless, uneventful session. Underlings remain unaugmented, and so does the royalty.

ROSE: And while this may sound advantageous to the players, it's a curse in disguise. The lack of prototypings which keeps adversaries unevolved has the same influence on the battlefield.

ROSE: Without successive prototypings, the battlefield will never reach its final form, which must be fertilized to grow a new universe.

ROSE: Instead, it remains in its most basic form, stuck in eternal stalemate.

ROSE: There is nothing players in a void session can do to change this. They are resigned to live out the rest of their days in a dead end session.

DAVE: still waiting to hear how this is in any way an improvement on all the shit we just escaped from

ROSE: It's a vast improvement.

ROSE: The new session is a blank slate, without a ridiculously short time limit for victory like ours had.

ROSE: There will be no time limit at all, in fact.

ROSE: Once we arrive, ostensibly that is when the nature of the session will change.

ROSE: It won't be classifiable as either a null or void session anymore. It will be something which, as far as I can tell, is unique.

ROSE: The fully matured battlefield from our session can be used to make the new one viable. The path to success will be made possible by a combination of efforts and assets from both iterations.

ROSE: Usually scratched sessions are absolute resets, and involve no direct influence from the first attempt at all. I can't find any precedent for our situation.

DAVE: jade has our battlefield right

ROSE: Yes.

DAVE: so she shows up and drops it in skaia

DAVE: and then we take the result of all that damn frog breeding we did and stick the thing in there somehow

DAVE: and we sit back and wait for it to do its huge ribbit or whatever

DAVE: and were golden

ROSE: Pretty much.

ROSE: As long as there is an actual vacancy in the center of Skaia when we get there.

DAVE: is that going to be a problem

ROSE: I don't think so.

ROSE: Even if it were, it would be a trivial obstacle.

ROSE: But as it is, I think the forces opposing these players are clandestinely working toward the same goal as we are.

ROSE: From what I can tell, gestures of antagonism, while certainly posing legitimate danger, have been factored in as critical stepping stones to one destination shared by all parties.

ROSE: I don't know why this is, or what the motives are yet.

ROSE: The appearance is one of clear sailing ahead, but traces of conspiracy are everywhere.

DAVE: ok but

DAVE: conspiracies aside

DAVE: did it ever really look like clear sailing to you

DAVE: thats not what i was seeing

DAVE: we are going to arrive and then soon after jack is going to show up

DAVE: and then we have to beat him right

DAVE: so there kind of is a time limit

ROSE: Yes, we will have to deal with Jack before all is said and done.

ROSE: And that will definitely be a major challenge.

ROSE: But it is not impossible. At least, not by design.

ROSE: When I said there would be no time limit in this session, I was talking about something more specific.

ROSE: There will be no reckoning.

DAVE: oh

DAVE: why not

ROSE: It's a logical consequence of any void session.

ROSE: The battlefield never evolves, and therefore the more extensive war between Prospit and Derse never takes shape.

ROSE: It is only when the Prospitian king falls in battle that the reckoning can be initiated by the forces of Derse.

ROSE: The meteors then rush to destroy the battlefield, while Skaia redirects them through defense portals for as long as it can.

ROSE: Thus, if there is no war, there is no reckoning, no meteors, and no imminent threat of failure.

ROSE: This is of course good news for Earth as well. During the reckoning, Skaia redirects all incoming meteors to the only place it can. Earth.

ROSE: So it turns out that players who initiate a void session are not actually condemning their home planet to an apocalyptic wasteland after they leave.

ROSE: In the new instance of our universe, Earth is just fine.

ROSE: Sort of.

DAVE: so

DAVE: no meteors came at all

DAVE: you mean by fucking up and having to scratch we also sort of saved earth in the process

ROSE: Again: sort of.

ROSE: And it's not that there were no meteors whatsoever.

ROSE: Just the vast majority of the destructive onslaught never showed up.

ROSE: But delivering the temple to the site of the forge is still integral to jumpstarting the session.

ROSE: That meteor however could have been propelled through a portal by any means, not just via the reckoning.

DAVE: i see

DAVE: what about the players themselves

DAVE: they had to arrive on meteors too didnt they

DAVE: i guess the baby meteors were some exceptions too right

ROSE: Yes.

ROSE: But they weren't flung through portals in their own session, nor will they be created there.

ROSE: They were created in our session, and sent back through our portals. Just like us.

DAVE: ................

ROSE: To understand what happened, it really helps to understand exactly what a scratch is.

ROSE: When John severely damaged the Beat Mesa on your planet, and sent it off to Skaia to release its temporal energy there, you could view it as a kind of "request."

ROSE: We were asking Skaia to change everything at a fundamental level, and we gave it the energy to do so.

ROSE: But Skaia is a very passive entity. It only "knows" and "sees," but it never quite "acts."

ROSE: When it is asked to change everything, there is only so much it has control over.

ROSE: In fact, it has control over exactly one thing. The defense portals.

ROSE: It can decide to send important meteors to different points in time than originally planned, thus creating alternate realities.

ROSE: Offshoots of promise, rather than futility.

ROSE: And it turns out the most important meteors of all tend to be the ones delivering the young players to their planet.

ROSE: So all it has to do to change everything is tweak their destination times a bit.

ROSE: All internally-prompted changes in the post-scratch universe are decided entirely by this modest adjustment to the parameters.

ROSE: It's a very simple concept, actually.

ROSE: Yet the consequences are dramatic. It results in not only a hard reset for the session, but a partial reset for the universe too, due to the many causal entanglements between a session and its originating universe.

DAVE: what do you mean tweak the destination times

DAVE: where did they get sent to

ROSE: A variety of different time periods.

ROSE: The simplest way to way to look at it is to picture the original destinations of our two groups of four ecto-babies...

ROSE: And switch them.

DAVE: what

ROSE: Though this is just a slight oversimplification.

ROSE: While it's roughly true, Skaia had some peculiar whims this time.

ROSE: While most landed in time periods corresponding with the original group,

ROSE: It seems that two of the new players arrived four centuries ahead of everyone else.

ROSE: For some bizarre reason.

DAVE: uh

ROSE: But they're still apparently able to communicate with their coplayers through I guess some Trollian-like technology, and they're still able to establish game connections with the others. So this stands as an odd but not otherwise terribly significant detail.

DAVE: so

DAVE: uh

DAVE: in this alt universe group of us and

DAVE: them

DAVE: which ones are the actual players

ROSE: I'll give you a hint.

ROSE: It isn't us.

DAVE: fuck

DAVE: why did i know that was gonna be the answer

ROSE: And to think that usually I'm the one accused of knowing the future.

DAVE: i dunno if im ready to process the ramifications of this bullshit

ROSE: You would find it less disconcerting if the players were alternate versions of us?

DAVE: man

DAVE: at least im used to dealing with alt daves

DAVE: ive been fuck deep in alt daves before

DAVE: its a goddamn delight if you want to know the truth

DAVE: but i dont even know what to think about...

ROSE: What?

ROSE: Meeting a deceased figure of authority as a peer?

DAVE: lets not even talk about it ok

DAVE: can we slow down this meteor

DAVE: delay the meetup

DAVE: maybe fight jack for a little while

ROSE: I honestly thought you would find the idea exciting.

ROSE: I know I'm looking forward to it.

DAVE: but your mom was just a nice alcoholic spinster who liked wizards who you complained about for no reason

DAVE: she wasnt anything like an untouchable master of irony who could replace the meat in your sandwich before it even occurred to you what the fuck you were chewing

DAVE: let me ask you this did your mom ever wiggle a puppet in your face even ONCE

ROSE: Not that I recall.

ROSE: But anecdotes like that just make me more curious to meet him, personally.

DAVE: fine well you can be on bro duty then

DAVE: ill be the ambassador to your mom

DAVE: and no that wasnt actually meant as the sick burn it sounded like

ROSE: She's your mom too, though.

DAVE: yeah i know

DAVE: ill be the ambassador to my mom then

DAVE: that sounds pretty stupid when i say it that way

DAVE: whatever

DAVE: ill be the fuckin one man welcome wagon for the john and jade teen old people and also our mom thats the plan

DAVE: so when we finally see them we can get our shit into formation like trained acrobats

DAVE: like ill blow a whistle and we make a human pyramid got it

DAVE: that way we can totally avoid anything awkward

ROSE: You do realize we've seen her already, right?

DAVE: what

DAVE: when

ROSE: Months ago.

ROSE: In a dream.

ROSE: She was floating along in Derse pajamas, asleep.

DAVE: wait that was her

ROSE: Yes.

DAVE: oh

DAVE: huh

DAVE: .....

ROSE: You're wondering why I didn't tell you?

DAVE: no

ROSE: You're specifically wondering why I wasn't forthcoming with an answer to your question at the time, "hey who was that choice babe in the pajamas?"

DAVE: god fucking dammit

ROSE: You don't find it nostalgic at all?

ROSE: Retracing the steps of some of our Freudian semi-blunders in conversations past?

DAVE: no what a load of shit

DAVE: stuff said between you and me before we knew we were related

DAVE: we both know that was a lot of horseplay bullfuckery between like smartass 10 year olds or whatever

DAVE: you cant seriously have taken any of that seriously

ROSE: ;)

DAVE: ugh dont ever do that

DAVE: all these fuckin

DAVE: momtraps and sistertraps

DAVE: what a joke i hope skaia gets to have a good laugh over shit like this

DAVE: wait i forgot skaia doesnt laugh it just "sees" and "knows"

DAVE: its like a huge blue perv thats mad jazzed for kidcest

KANAYA: What Are You People Even Talking About

ROSE: ;)

DAVE: dont you wink at her

DAVE: kanaya heres a protip that wink meant jack dick shes just being weird

KANAYA: I Feel As Though This Conversation Has Utterly Outmaneuvered My Constructive Involvement

KANAYA: Im Going To Go

DAVE: yeah im pretty much ollying outie too

DAVE: got some shit to attend to

DAVE: after you

KANAYA: Augh

KANAYA: Why Does That Always Happen

KARKAT: EVERYBODY OUT OF THE GODDAMN WAY.

KARKAT: I GOT A LAB FULL OF HUMANS, A MOUTH FULL OF YELLING, AND A TORTURED PSYCHOLOGICAL PROFILE FULL OF TOTALLY HYSTERICAL EMOTIONS AND UNAIRED GRIEVANCES AT PRACTICALLY EVERYBODY.

DAVE: karkat is broken guys

KARKAT: YEAH

KARKAT: OK HOLD ON

KARKAT: IF I CAN SETTLE DOWN A TICK I SHOULD BE ABLE TO MAKE MORE SENSE SHORTLY

KARKAT: JUST ONE...

KARKAT: *huff huff*

ROSE: Maybe you should lie down on the couch.

KARKAT: FUCK...

KARKAT: *wheeze*

KARKAT: NO

DAVE: dude what is the matter with you

KARKAT: WOW OK

KARKAT: THAT WAS A PRETTY TERRIBLE ENTRANCE.

KARKAT: ANYWAY

KARKAT: WHERE WAS I.

DAVE: dunno but i was just leaving

KARKAT: NOT SO FAST STRIDER, THIS HEAVILY CONCERNS YOU.

KARKAT: IT CONCERNS YOU EXCLUSIVELY IN FACT.

KARKAT: WHERE DO YOU THINK YOU'RE GOING?

DAVE: just stepping out to do a thing

DAVE: which is not your business

KARKAT: LIKE MY INFLAMED QUAKING GALLSPHINCTER IT'S NOT.

KARKAT: TELL ME, ARE YOU BY ANY CHANCE GOING TO HAVE SOME COMPANY WHEN YOU STEP OUT TO DO THIS "THING?"

KARKAT: NOTICE THE TWO HEAVILY DRAMATIZED "ENCLOSURE TALONS" SURROUNDING THAT WORD, WHICH I AM SCORNFULLY PANTOMIMING WITH MY OWN TWO HANDS, AS PRESENTLY BEING DEMONSTRATED FOR YOU.

DAVE: yeah sure

KARKAT: OH??

KARKAT: WHO WOULD THAT BE MAY I ASK?

DAVE: well

DAVE: probably the mayor

DAVE: hes usually down for whatever

KARKAT: I'M NOT TALKING ABOUT THE FUCKING MAYOR, AND YOU FUCKING KNOW IT.

DAVE: hey dont be saying shit about the mayor

DAVE: the mayor rules hes like my best fucking friend

KARKAT: HE'S NOT A MAYOR. HE'S THE MAYOR OF FUCKSTICK JUNCTION LOCATED SMACK DAB IN THE MIDDLE OF PRETEND ASS NOWHERE.

DAVE: hes a mayor you douche his thing says mayor

KARKAT: IT SAYS "MAYO" AND HE WROTE THE "R" HIMSELF.

KARKAT: HE'S AT BEST A MAYO. AND WHO EVER HEARD OF A MAYO? IT'S EVERY BIT AS IMAGINARY AS HIS IDENTITY AS AN ELECTED OFFICIAL.

DAVE: no mayo is like grub sauce but without grubs

KARKAT: WHO THE FUCK EVER HEARD OF GRUB SAUCE WITHOUT GRUBS??? WHAT'S IT MADE OF THEN GENIUS!

DAVE: like

DAVE: uh

DAVE: i dunno its white and it just sort of exists

DAVE: you dont ask about mayo thats not what you do with mayo

KARKAT: ISN'T IT FUNNY HOW QUICKLY YOUR BULLSHIT UNRAVELS WHEN SOMEONE INTELLIGENT ACTUALLY HOLDS YOU ACCOUNTABLE??

KARKAT: YOU ARE FUCKING BUSTED STRIDER.

KARKAT: YOU ARE BUSTED ABOUT "MAYO" AND YOU ARE BUSTED ABOUT TEREZI.

DAVE: hahaha you are pathetic

DAVE: this is why you all stormed in here out of breath

DAVE: what did you actually sprint all the way across the meteor to tell me this

KARKAT: WHAT I DO WITH MY LEGS AND HOW FAST I MOVE THEM IS MY BUSINESS YOU SHIT.

DAVE: yeah and what i do with mine is mine

DAVE: watch me make them make me leave

KARKAT: I SAID STAY YOUR ASS PUT, WE'RE TALKING HERE.

DAVE: dude dont touch my cape

DAVE: ...

DAVE: huh

KARKAT: WHAT

DAVE: i cant believe i seriously just said dude dont touch my cape to somebody and was serious about it

KARKAT: OK, LOOK I'M NOWHERE NEAR YOUR PRECIOUS STUPID CAPE. JUST LISTEN.

KARKAT: BEFORE YOU GO OFF TO SNOG TEREZI IN YOUR IDIOTIC LITTLE VILLAGE OF NUTRITION CYLINDERS, HEAR ME OUT.

DAVE: man

DAVE: you are so overblowing this

KARKAT: BUT I DON'T THINK THAT I AM!

DAVE: yeah you are

DAVE: you have some idea about us or what were getting up to

DAVE: so weve done a few things together to pass the time so what

DAVE: i dont even think you could call them dates or anything

DAVE: what the fuck would even qualify as a date on this gross dark meteor

KARKAT: DAVE, CAN WE JUST CUT THE SHIT?

KARKAT: I AM NOT AN IMBECILE. YOU ARE BOTH PLAINLY TIPPING INTO FLUSHED TERRITORY IRRESPECTIVE OF ENVIRONMENTAL FACTORS OR WHATEVER LAME CONDITIONS IT IS HUMANS BELIEVE TO BE OPTIMAL FOR PURSUING A MATESPRITSHIP.

KARKAT: ANYONE CAN SEE THAT, IT'S THE SHITTIEST KEPT SECRET ON THIS METEOR. PROBABLY EVEN THE FUCKING MAYOR GETS IT, AND LET'S FACE IT, HE'S A LITTLE SLOW.

KARKAT: DO YOU REALLY THINK YOU COULD PULL THE WOOLBEAST MATERIAL OVER THE EYES OF A HARDENED VETERAN OF ROMANTIC STUDIES?

DAVE: we have one of those???

KARKAT: I HAVE SEEN THOUSANDS OF TROLL ROMANCE FILMS, EACH DEALING WITH TOPICS FAR MORE SUBTLE AND COMPLEX THAN YOUR PEDESTRIAN HUMAN MIND COULD EVER GRASP.

KARKAT: AND IN CASE YOU'VE FORGOTTEN, I'VE ALREADY WATCHED HUNDREDS OF YOUR MORE PRIMITIVE BUT MODERATELY ENTERTAINING ROMANCE FILMS.

KARKAT: REMEMBER HOW I DOWNLOADED A FUCK TON OF THEM AFTER DISCOVERING YOUR SPECIES? I AM A CURIOUS MAN, DAVE, YOU COULD LEARN FROM ME.

DAVE: yeah i remember

DAVE: havent you only watched a bunch of shitty dane cook movies on infinite loop since we left

KARKAT: YOU'RE SEVERELY EXAGGERATING, BUT YES I HAVE SAMPLED HIS WORK.

DAVE: dude

DAVE: you know youre only pretending to be a huge fan of his bullshit to piss me off

KARKAT: AGAIN LOOK AT HOW SELF ABSORBED YOU'RE BEING!!!

KARKAT: I HAPPEN TO THINK HE HAS A BRILLIANT COMEDIC MIND, FOR A HUMAN.

DAVE: hrnngngnngghhhh

DAVE: it turns out that exact sentence is my one weakness

DAVE: you win bro you got your girl back

KARKAT: OH SHUT UP.

KARKAT: I AM NOT HERE TO DEBATE YOU ON THE FINER POINTS OF CINEMA, OR TO "GET MY GIRL BACK."

KARKAT: HOW DESPERATE DO YOU THINK I AM?

KARKAT: I'M ACTUALLY HERE TO DO THE OPPOSITE.

KARKAT: I WANTED TO TELL YOU I'M TOTALLY OK WITH IT.

DAVE: oh

DAVE: ok then

KARKAT: BUT JUST LISTEN, AND TRY TO KEEP AN OPEN MIND. I KNOW THAT'S HARD FOR YOU.

KARKAT: HERE, PLEASE TAKE A LOOK AT THIS.

DAVE: oh no

DAVE: what the hot mess of fresh fuck am i looking at

KARKAT: IT'S AN ALTERNIAN ROMANCE NOVEL.

KARKAT: NOW LOOK, I'M NOT VOUCHING FOR THIS PARTICULAR PIECE OF LITERATURE. IT'S ACTUALLY PRETTY TRASHY AND IF YOU'RE INTERESTED I COULD RECOMMEND MUCH BETTER THINGS TO YOU.

KARKAT: IT'S JUST THIS ONE ILLUSTRATES THE CONCEPT VERY CLEARLY.

DAVE: what...

DAVE: "concept"

KARKAT: IT'S A PRETTY TYPICAL CASE OF QUADRANT VACILLATION AS APPLIED TO AN OVERLAPPING GROUP OF ROMANTIC PAIRINGS.

DAVE: you lost me at quadrant

DAVE: for future reference thats the word that always lets me know its time to check out of a sentence

KARKAT: WILL YOU PIPE DOWN AND JUST HEAR ME OUT.

KARKAT: IT'S REALLY SIMPLE. THINK OF IT AS BEING SIMILAR TO ONE OF YOUR PRIMITIVE HUMAN LOVE TRIANGLES.

KARKAT: THOUGH THIS IS A QUADRANGLE. THOSE ARE MUCH MORE COMMON IN OUR SOCIETY AND ENTERTAINMENT, AND FOUR IS PRETTY MUCH THE MINIMUM VALUE FOR LOVE-HATE N-DRANGLES.

DAVE: n drangles

DAVE: god dammit

KARKAT: NOW HERE IS WHAT'S ACTUALLY GOING ON WITH THIS GROUP OF CHARACTERS. PAY ATTENTION. HEY, LOOK AT ME. EYES OVER HERE. GOOD.

KARKAT: SEE THE TWO HEROES IN THE MIDDLE, PARTAKING IN THEIR FLUSHED EMBRACE? PRETTY MUCH YOUR TYPICAL LOWBLOOD REDROM PAIRING. THEIR DYNAMIC IS THE GRUBLOAF AND TUBER PASTE OF THE OVERALL ARC.

DAVE: .........

KARKAT: BUT WHAT HAVE WE HERE? THERE ARE SOME NEFARIOUS HIGHBLOODS IN THE PICTURE TOO. THIS IS WHERE IT GETS INTERESTING.

KARKAT: THE GUY ON THE LEFT IS AN OLD CALIGINOUS FLAME FROM THE MALE LOWBLOOD'S PAST, AND HAS REENTERED THE PICTURE. AGAIN, NOTHING OUT OF THE ORDINARY. HE CAN CONTINUE TO COURT HIS MATESPRIT AND KISMESIS WITHOUT CONFLICT. IT'S A PERFECTLY AMICABLE ARRANGEMENT THAT EVERYONE'S TOTALLY DOWN WITH.

DAVE: what is that huge beefcake troll even doing

DAVE: is he grinding against the little dudes shoulder what is even going on

DAVE: why the fuck is he nude

KARKAT: NO QUESTIONS YET.

KARKAT: SO THEN THAT'S ALL FINE, PRETTY BOILERPLATE CONDITIONS FOR UNFOLDING ROMDRAMA, BUT THERE'S A TWIST.

KARKAT: THE MALE HIGHBLOOD AND LOWBLOOD START TO HAVE FLUSHED FEELINGS FOR ONE ANOTHER, AND THIS RESULTS IN SOME RED INFIDELITY BETWEEN THE LOWBLOOD PAIR.

KARKAT: OBVIOUSLY THIS IS WHERE THE FIREWORKS START GOING OFF. THE RED FEELINGS BETWEEN THE LOWBLOODS TURN TO BLACK, AND THUS BEGINS WHAT IS REFERRED TO AS QUADRANT VACILLATION.

KARKAT: MEANWHILE THE TWO MALES ARE ALSO VACILLATING BETWEEN RED AND BLACK, BECAUSE YOU DON'T JUST LET GO OF A RIVALRY SO EASILY.

DAVE: what is going on with the other chick

DAVE: all grabbing at the other one down there in the corner

KARKAT: YEAH, WELL, IT GETS EVEN MORE COMPLICATED THAN THAT, PROBABLY MORE THAN NEEDED FOR THE SAKE OF MAKING THE POINT.

KARKAT: IN THE HEAT OF THEIR VACILLATION, DURING AN ESPECIALLY BLACK PHASE, THE LOWBLOOD FEMALE WAXES RED FOR A NOTORIOUS AND ESPECIALLY BRUTAL HIGHBLOOD FEMALE.

KARKAT: SO THEY HAVE THEIR THING ON THE SIDE, BUT EVEN THAT STARTS VACILLATING TOO BECAUSE THE ORIGINAL PAIR JUST KEEP SPINNING LIKE A TOP.

KARKAT: WE DON'T NEED TO GET BOGGED DOWN IN THE QUADRANGLE DYNAMIC THOUGH, AND FOR OUR PURPOSES THE 4TH PARTY IS A DISTRACTION.

DAVE: our purposes

DAVE: what the fuck are our purposes

KARKAT: THE THING IS, VACILLATION ALWAYS ADDS A LOT OF DRAMA TO EVERYTHING, BUT THAT DOESN'T MEAN IT CAN'T BE VIABLE.

KARKAT: IT CAN TOTALLY WORK, AND EVERYONE CAN BE REASONABLE ABOUT IT, IT REALLY JUST COMES DOWN TO A MATTER OF SENSIBLE SCHEDULING.

DAVE: you must be out of your fucking mind if you think i want to know where youre going with this

KARKAT: DAVE, PLEASE.

KARKAT: JUST READ THE BOOK, OK? IT'S ALL IN THE BOOK.

DAVE: im not reading that shit

DAVE: i cant even read your stupid troll language why would you think i can

KARKAT: I THINK YOU SHOULD RECONSIDER. I CAN TRANSLATE FOR YOU. I'LL READ THE WHOLE DAMN THING ALOUD IF YOU WANT.

KARKAT: SERIOUSLY, IT COULD REALLY EXPAND YOUR LIMITED HUMAN THINK PAN ON STUFF.

KARKAT: THERE'S A LOT HERE THAT'S APPLICABLE TO OUR SITUATION.

DAVE: there is nothing even slightly applicable about any of that bullshit to our situation

KARKAT: DON'T BE DENSE. OF COURSE THERE IS.

KARKAT: TEREZI AND I HAVE BEEN ON THE VERGE OF VACILLATING LIKE THIS FOR A LONG TIME.

KARKAT: IT'S ABOUT TIME WE KILLED THE SUSPENSE AND JUST ACKNOWLEDGED IT.

KARKAT: YOU AND SHE SEEM BENT ON DEVELOPING SOMETHING IN THE FLUSHED QUADRANT, AND LIKE I SAID, I'M FINE WITH THAT.

KARKAT: IF WE CAN JUST GET OUR SHIT STRAIGHTENED OUT, WE CAN BE LIKE THESE VACILLATING PAIRS THAT ALTERNATE BETWEEN RED AND BLACK, BUT IN A WAY THAT'S COMPLEMENTARY WITH EACH OTHER'S PATTERNS.

DAVE: oh my god

DAVE: why is this happening

KARKAT: LIKE WHILE SHE AND I ARE BLACK, YOU AND SHE ARE RED.

KARKAT: BUT THEN WHEN SHE AND I ARE RED, YOU AND SHE... I DON'T KNOW IF HUMANS ARE REALLY CAPABLE OF BLACK FEELINGS?

KARKAT: I GUESS THAT'S UP TO YOU. MAYBE YOU CAN JUST LIKE, SIT THOSE PERIODS OUT.

KARKAT: LIKE TAKE A BREAK, YOU KNOW?

DAVE: youve completely lost it dude

DAVE: i cant believe for a fucking second this is reasonable shit to propose even on troll world

DAVE: you just

DAVE: totally snapped

KARKAT: SNAPPED LIKE A FUCKING FOX. THIS MAKES PERFECT SENSE.

KARKAT: LIKE I SAID, IT'S JUST A MATTER OF RESPONSIBLE SCHEDULING.

KARKAT: HERE LET ME SHOW YOU.

KARKAT: I NEED SOME PAPER. WHERE'S SOME PAPER.

DAVE: hnnrrghh

KARKAT: LOOK, IT'S PERFECTLY SIMPLE.

KARKAT: HANG ON WHILE I DRAW THE GUIDELINES.

DAVE: oh no

DAVE: no you are NOT making another shipping grid dude

KARKAT: IT'S NOT A SHIPPING GRID.

KARKAT: JUST SOME ROWS AND COLUMNS FOR A SCHEDULE.

DAVE: its a grid youre drawing a goddamn grid

DAVE: im not letting you draw a grid for this stupid shit

KARKAT: COME ON, LOOK HERE. THESE ARE THE DAYS OF THE WEEK.

KARKAT: THEN WE EACH HAVE ROWS FOR THOSE DAYS AND WE CAN DRAW A HEART OR A SPADE FOR ANY GIVEN DAY.

KARKAT: THAT WAY WE KNOW WHAT'S UP IN ADVANCE, AND AVOID UNPLEASANT CONFLICTS.

DAVE: put the fucking pen down

KARKAT: HEY, CUT IT OUT. DON'T TOUCH ME.

DAVE: do not draw a shipping grid

DAVE: do not do it

KARKAT: IT'S NOT A SHIPPING GRID YOU OBTUSE FUCK.

DAVE: this is fucked up put it down

KARKAT: NO.

DAVE: you are not drawing a grid to organize our goddamn dating lives

DAVE: that is some straight up crackpot motherfuckin noise i will not abide

KARKAT: FUCK YOU. LET ME DRAW.

DAVE: stop drawing the shipping grid

KARKAT: *IT IS NOT A SHIPPING GRID*

KARKAT: THIS IS NOT SHIPPING YOU HEINOUS TOOL, THIS IS COMMON SENSE.

DAVE: you will not draw anything that even remotely resembles a grid

DAVE: do not draw an arrangement of squares or otherwise interlocking polygons

KARKAT: LET GO.

DAVE: you will not draw a spreadsheet for the purpose of allocating time spent with a mutual girlfriend you horses ass

DAVE: that is exactly the shit i do not want to see

KARKAT: LOOK, I JUST DREW A SQUARE.

KARKAT: GET READY TO SEE A LOT MORE OF THOSE!

DAVE: no

DAVE: stop

DAVE: do not draw any additional squares

DAVE: do not draw any quadrilaterals or trapezoids or rectangles or fucking n-drangles and especially as fuck not any god damned rhombuses

DAVE: i dont want to see your lines making any right angles do you understand

KARKAT: IN MY MIND'S EYE I AM PICTURING A BEAUTIFUL LATTICE OF LINES AND COMPARTMENTS, INTERLOCKING WITH SUBLIME PRECISION AT NINETY DEGREE ANGLES.

KARKAT: I IMAGINE THIS MODULAR RETICULATION AS AN ELEGANT VESSEL, IF YOU WILL, FOR THE GRAND SYNTHESIS OF OUR SHARED SHIPPING DREAMS.

DAVE: no

DAVE: that is the perfect example of what you shouldnt be drawing

KARKAT: YES

DAVE: no

KARKAT: FUCK YES

KARKAT: OOH LOOK, ANOTHER SQUARE, SORT OF.

KARKAT: KIND OF WOBBLY! IT'LL HAVE TO DO.

DAVE: no you fuck

KARKAT: WAIT, I THINK IT'S COMING.

KARKAT: HERE IT COMES, MY FIRST "SHIP", IT'S GOING IN THE SQUARE!

DAVE: put the goddamn pen down

DAVE: you piece of shit

KARKAT: HELL NO.

DAVE: yes

KARKAT: WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM??

KARKAT: OW, FUCK.

DAVE: this is so sick does she even know youre doing this

KARKAT: DOING WHAT??

DAVE: splitting up her time in a grid for your stupid rotating hate date plan

KARKAT: SHE WILL SOON ENOUGH.

DAVE: what a presumptuous sack of shit put the pen down

KARKAT: NO, I'M DRAWING.

DAVE: step away from your dumb ugly scribble grid

KARKAT: GET LOST.

DAVE: youre messing up roses book

KARKAT: YOU SMELL BAD.

DAVE: dont talk to me about rank smells

DAVE: you are the fuckin big man of smellin bad

DAVE: you dominate the paint with your stonk

KARKAT: MY LUSUS BROUGHT THINGS HOME THAT SMELLED MORE APPEALING THAN YOU.

KARKAT: IMPORTANT FACT: 100% OF WHAT HE BROUGHT HOME WAS EITHER A DEAD ANIMAL, OR LITERAL FECES.

DAVE: oh yeah well check it out:

DAVE: you smell like if someone took a dump on a butt

KARKAT: HOW CAN SHE STAND YOU WITH HER SENSITIVE NOSE?

KARKAT: HAVE YOU EVER EVEN WASHED THAT RIDICULOUS OUTFIT?

DAVE: theyre magic fucking pajamas they stay like perma clean or something

DAVE: theyre enchanted and comfy as fuck give me the pen

KARKAT: NO, IT'S MINE NOW. I'M KEEPING IT ON PRINCIPLE.

DAVE: karkat whoa man what are you doing

DAVE: why are you drawing all these human dicks

DAVE: how do you even know what they look like what have you been watching??

KARKAT: I'M NOT DRAWING THOSE!!!!!!!

KARKAT: YOU'RE MAKING ME DRAW THEM, STOP THAT.

DAVE: no way

DAVE: this book is now like

DAVE: our fight fueled ouija board of cock

KARKAT: ARGH... STOP!

KARKAT: DON'T

KARKAT: NO FUCK

KARKAT: OK NO

KARKAT: YOU DREW THAT ONE

KARKAT: YOU DREW THAT ONE!!!!

KARKAT: DON'T PRETEND YOU DIDN'T!

DAVE: are you sure man

DAVE: thats the spooky thing about penis ouija you can never be sure who did the dicks

DAVE: was it you or me or maybe a ghoooost???

KARKAT: FUUUUUUUCK LET GO OF ME!

DAVE: gimme the pen

KARKAT: NO

DAVE: yes

KARKAT: NO

DAVE: yes

KARKAT: FINE TAKE IT!

DAVE: no

KARKAT: WHAT??

DAVE: were still drawing

KARKAT: LET GO

DAVE: are you kidding this is a fucking masterpiece we have to see this through

KARKAT: I'M TRYING TO LET GO OF THE STUPID PEN BUT YOU WON'T LET ME

DAVE: we are in the shit now

DAVE: we are motherfuckin entrenched in this bitch

KARKAT: YOU CRAZY FUCK

DAVE: were running out of room rose can you turn the page for us

KARKAT: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!

KARKAT: THIS ALTERCATION IS BECOMING UNCOMFORTABLY PHYSICAL, GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM ME.

DAVE: what are you talking about

KARKAT: YOU KNOW WHAT I'M TALKING ABOUT.

DAVE: shut up and draw another penis

KARKAT: YOU DON'T EVEN UNDERSTAND THE SOCIAL IMPLICATIONS OF ALL THIS HOSTILE TOUCHING AND GRABBING DO YOU???

KARKAT: I DON'T FEEL THAT WAY ABOUT YOU STRIDER, JUST STEP OFF.

DAVE: man if you want to look at this that way then thats your business

DAVE: this is just an old fashioned beatdown where im from deal with it

KARKAT: WHY DON'T YOU OLD FASHIONED GO FUCK YOURSELF?

DAVE: stop biting my cape

KARKAT: FUFCK NYOUF.

KARKAT: RAAARARRAAUUUAAAAUUAGHGHGGHGGGGHHGH!

DAVE: shit!

#homestuck #dave strider #rose lalonde #kanaya maryam #karkat vantas #homestuck act 6 #page 4696 #page 4697 #page 4698 #page 4699 #page 4700 #page 4701 #page 4702 #page 4703 #page 4704 #page 4705 #page 4706 #page 4707 #page 4708 #page 4709 #page 4710 #page 4711 #page 4712 #page 4713 #page 4714 #page 4715 #page 4716 #page 4717 #page 4718 #page 4719

[stearixx]

Gotta post my about me here.

Stee/Stearix, F17.

Really passionate about Mother 3 and Jesus Christ - Superstar, although my other interests include:

-Subnautica

-Death Cab for Cutie

-OSU! and other rhythm games

-Russian rock band "Пикник"

-Frutiger Aero

-Soviet electronic music

-...and other things found on my Tumblr page.

Commission info:

https://docs.google.com/document/d/1U638tIhe80phnOnrKnwZEMe3oRGU486NTy9qmsC5OEw/edit?usp=drivesdk

My other blog: @paralaxx

Telegram chat and diary: https://t.me/stearixx_spa

My discord server:

Also:

SW-6150-1779-4705

Me on discord - @stearixx

☜︎︎❖︎︎♏︎︎❒︎︎⍓︎︎⧫︎︎♒︎︎♓︎︎■︎︎♑︎︎ ✋︎︎ ♒︎︎♋︎︎❖︎︎♏︎︎ ♏︎︎❖︎︎♏︎︎❒︎︎ ●︎︎□︎︎❖︎︎♏︎︎♎︎︎ ♒︎︎♋︎︎♎︎︎ ♌︎︎♏︎︎♏︎︎■︎︎ ⧫︎︎♋︎︎🙵♏︎︎■︎︎ ♋︎︎⬥︎︎♋︎︎⍓︎︎ ♐︎︎❒︎︎□︎︎❍︎︎ ❍︎♏︎

👌︎◆︎⧫︎ ■︎□︎⧫︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎📪︎ ❍︎⍓︎ 💣︎♋︎❒︎♓︎♏︎ ✌︎■︎⧫︎□︎♓︎■︎♏︎⧫︎⧫︎♏︎📪︎ ♐︎□︎❒︎ ✋︎ ⬥︎♓︎●︎●︎ ♑︎♓︎❖︎♏︎ ⍓︎□︎◆︎ ♏︎⧫︎♏︎❒︎■︎♋︎●︎ ●︎♓︎♐︎♏︎

#about me

[hollandorks]

saved

matt murdock x original female character

chapter two

Summary: Fleeing from an abusive relationship, Grace St. James goes to the only place she still has a friend: Hell’s Kitchen. She’s forced to live in her car and beg for a job from the law firm Nelson, Murdock, and Page all the while making sure her past doesn’t catch up to her. Enter Matt Murdock: cocky, handsome, and willing to let her live with him for free until she can afford to get a place of her own. Grace is drawn to Matt in a way she’s never been drawn to anyone, causing sparks to fly as they inevitably grow closer and closer.

a/n: Fuck it, I want everyone to go ahead and see our favorite blind lawyer so I’m posting ch 2 immediately! However--not sure when the next update will be. 

Series Masterlist

word count: 4705

Grace took a deep, grateful breath of air as she and Ryan walked. “So, what time does this law firm open?”

Matt’s POV 

Things had been going decently well for Matt Murdock for once. 

Of course, he mused as he walked to work that morning, he’d been through enough that it made sense that things got to be uncomplicated. For a while, at least. 

He and Foggy had helped Karen through law school and she had taken the bar exam. He was confident she’d pass. Foggy and Marci were engaged. Matt’s best friend was actually his best friend again, and had even asked him to be best man. The firm was still getting paid in pastries and other random things–like one woman coming in to clean every other week–but it had become a much better mix of pastries and actual money. 

And Daredevil…well, Daredevil was still around. But Matt had finally found balance, or something close to it, between his life in the shadows and his life as a lawyer. Crime still happened. It was Hell’s Kitchen, after all. And the justice system couldn’t catch everything. But he wasn’t almost killing himself every other night and he wasn’t putting his friends in danger every time he investigated something. 

Matt settled into his desk for the morning. Foggy and Karen weren’t there yet. Foggy was probably off bribing Mahoney with cigars for his mom again, and Karen had some sort of appointment. 

He didn’t mind. He liked these quiet moments in the office. Sometimes he didn’t even do work–not that he’d tell them that–but simply basked in the peaceful air as he sipped coffee or ate breakfast. 

As Matt pulled out a sheaf of papers he’d meant to read the night before, there was an unfamiliar scent and heartbeat coming up the stairs. He straightened. A client, maybe? He slipped his tinted sunglasses on as he focused on the woman coming tentatively up the stairs. She had papers in her hands and smelled freshly of coffee. And she was nervous. Really nervous. Her pulse fluttered. He could hear her taking deep breaths as if to calm her nerves. 

Matt waited to hear her knock at the door. A minute passed. Two. The woman seemed to be considering leaving when she finally knocked. 

“Come in!” he called, because a blind man couldn’t play door greeter very well. He came around his desk to the doorway as the door creaked open. He waited, holding his cane loosely. 

“Oh–Hi,” the woman said, her voice strong despite how obvious her nerves were. To him, at least. Her hands were trembling slightly around her papers and her purse. “My name is Grace St. James. Are you–Are you part of Nelson, Murdock, and Page?” He heard her shift as she no doubt looked around the empty office. 

“Murdock. Matt Murdock. Mr. Nelson and Ms. Page are both out at the moment, but I’d be happy to get started on helping you with your case. Please, come take a seat.” He withdrew into his office, letting his cane bump against things as he went, before settling into his chair with his hands folded professionally. 

The woman–Grace–hesitated, then sat in the chair across from his desk. Matt forced himself not to notice too much about her, to respect her privacy, but that little part of his brain that had developed during puberty whispered, She’s beautiful. He didn’t need Foggy there to corroborate it for him, although he was certain he would the moment he saw her. 

“It’s not a case,” she said as she sat. Her back was straight but her hands were still shaky. 

Matt frowned. “Not a case?” he repeated, as if unsure he’d heard her right. People didn’t usually just…drop by. And she hadn’t asked for any of them by name, so she wasn’t a friend of Foggy’s or Karen’s. 

“I’m actually here for a job. I’ve heard that your firm has a reputation for helping good people, and that you might need a secretary.” Her voice wavered just slightly on the word good. “And I’d be really, really grateful if you could consider me for the position.”

Matt’s confusion only grew. He could tell her clothes were expensive, and she had diamond studs in her ears. Her perfume was so slight it practically reeked of money, of privilege. Only those really nice perfumes could be so subtle that he could stand them with his enhanced sense of smell. 

So what was a woman like that doing here, asking for a job? And why was she nervous? 

“A secretary,” Matt said. “Well, yes, we do probably need one of those, or an office manager. Karen–Ms. Page–was our office manager until she started working with us as a partner.” 

He knew she realized he didn’t directly answer her. She shifted in her seat. As she did, her purse shifted too. He scented metal and new plastic. The phone in her purse, so new it was practically untouched. Another odd thing to add to the list, he thought. 

“Please, Mr. Murdock,” she finally said, the desperation clear in her voice. “I’ve just–had to start over with my life, and I don’t have any other options right now. I’ll work as your maid, if you need me to. Part time, even. One day a week, I don’t care. I just really, really need a job. Please.” 

Matt’s heart panged with sympathy. She was starting over–so maybe her things were nice, but she no longer had money. It happened often enough. But there was something else there, too, some other note in her voice and in the sharp tang of the sweat that was pricking over her body. 

Fear. 

This woman was not only nervous and desperate. She was afraid. 

He’d always had a soft spot for beautiful women in trouble. Or who were trouble.

Foggy would call him a sucker. 

“We do need a secretary,” he said again, slowly this time. “And I’d be happy to consider you.” 

Some of the tension left her body so quickly he almost smiled. “Oh, thank you. I–here, I have my resume–Shit. Fuck–Sorry! I can…read it to you.” Her wince was so loud he was pretty sure a regular blind man could have heard it. 

Something about the way she spoke was really endearing. 

Matt could practically hear Foggy’s loud sigh in his head. 

“No, it’s alright, if you just want to leave it here I have to discuss any hirings with my colleagues first. But we do help good people, and if you’re alright with that, you might be a good fit. Especially if you don’t mind occasionally being paid in pastries or a free accounting consultation by some of our clients.” He flashed her a grin that he knew was charming. 

A startled laugh slipped from her lips. Her heartbeat slowed and calmed. His head tilted automatically to catch the subtleties of the sound. 

Matt smiled at her, a real smile, and he heard the little jump in her pulse as he did it. 

“Pastries sound great,” she said with another laugh. Matt had to admit, he liked the sound. Some people had really annoying laughs. Hers was nice. Cute, even. “As long as I at least make a steady paycheck of some kind. I really do need a job, more than you know.” 

“Then I’ll give you an unofficial offer. I’d be fine with hiring you–especially since right now you’re our only applicant.” He laughed lightly as he laced his fingers together on the desk. “But I need to talk to the others first, if you don’t mind. Is your phone number on your resume?” 

“Yes, of course. Yes, my phone number’s on there, as well as my email.” She slid the papers onto his desk and tapped them twice. “Straight in front of you on the edge.” He immediately liked her more. Most people weren’t accommodating to his disability, choosing instead to pretend like it didn’t exist. Or that he was a complete invalid. 

Matt sensed her hesitation before she finally said, “I know this might sound…weird. But when you call my references, can you–can you maybe not say exactly where you’re calling from?” The noise of her teeth rasping over her lower lip. 

Matt arched an eyebrow. A weird request, yes. But the fear was back again, and this woman was practically shaking with it. “Alright. I’ll talk to the others this afternoon and call you either this evening or tomorrow.” 

“Thank you,” she said vehemently. “Thank you. Even if I don’t get the job, thank you for even considering me.” 

“Of course. It was a pleasure to meet you, Ms. St. James.” 

“You too, Mr. Murdock.” 

He couldn’t help the words that slipped out. “Please, call me Matt.” To cover for his slip, he added, “You should know upfront this is a pretty laid back place to work. Foggy’s my best friend, and we’ve been friends with Karen for years, ever since she started working for us.” 

He heard the soft smile in her voice. “That sounds lovely.” There was a note of wistfulness in her voice. “Thanks again…Matt. Talk to you soon.” 

“Nice to meet you,” he called softly after her. He listened to the front door creak open then shut. Her footsteps paused right outside and she gave a small little sigh. Then her footsteps retreated outside, where he heard her do a little jig on the front sidewalk. He laughed, then sighed. 

Saint James, he thought idly. The patron saint of pilgrims, with his name attached to a beautiful woman starting over, who had fear loud in her heart. 

Matt sighed again. Of course he was going to hire her. 

Foggy was going to smack him for having a soft spot for a beautiful woman. Again. 

–

Grace’s POV

Grace’s first thought was that Matt Murdock was handsome. Then she noticed he was blind. Then she was too nervous, too afraid he’d turn her away, to notice much else. 

But he was giving her serious consideration, and that was enough for her. She had been so excited and full of hope that she’d done a little dance right there outside the office. Thankfully, it was New York, and no one passing by gave her a second glance. 

Grace immediately pulled out her new phone and texted Ryan the good–well, hopefully good–news. She’d spent another night in her car, which really hadn’t been so bad. Ryan had given her a couple of blankets and a couple of yoga mats to sleep on. With her bags in the front seat, she could let the back seat down and sleep stretched out with her lower body in the trunk. It hadn’t been that comfortable, but it was better than nothing. She’d showered and ironed her clothes that morning and even watched the baby for a few minutes while Jess showered and Ryan got the restaurant ready to open for brunch. 

Without her old phone, Grace could almost pretend Dean Bennett didn’t exist. Almost. 

She decided to walk around Hell’s Kitchen and explore a little since she hadn’t gotten much of an opportunity the day before. It was a nice day, warm but not too warm, the late August air not stifling for once. 

Maybe Nelson, Murdock, and Page could point her in another direction if they didn’t hire her, or if they could only hire her part time. Matt seemed nice, really nice, and willing to help her out. She hadn’t been able to help the little kick her heart had given at his charming smile. 

She’d realized in the same moment that she hadn’t found a man attractive in…a long time. Too long. And maybe it was just because Matt Murdock was nice to her, but damn if she hadn’t taken advantage of his blindness to study him openly for a moment as they’d talked. 

She sobered a little as she walked past a delicious smelling coffee shop and decided to duck inside. 

Well, Matt Murdock might not be nice. Because Dean had a charming smile like that, that same politeness, the same easygoing manner. 

There was no telling what Matt Murdock was like behind closed doors, and she knew that better than anyone. 

She shuddered. She thought she would know intuitively if Matt wasn’t nice, and so far she hadn’t had a bad feeling about him. That couldn’t always be trusted, though. She’d already proven not to have great judgment when it came to men. 

Grace bought herself a coffee and continued her walk. By the time she finished her coffee, she had a relatively good understanding of Hell’s Kitchen, and it was lunchtime. So she stepped inside a little restaurant that had good prices and a decent crowd to sit and kill some time. 

She’d brought her laptop with her and found herself double-checking that all of her location services were still turned off. She’d deleted all of her social media and email accounts, creating a new one just to put on her resume. So far, Ryan and Jess and their restaurant–the Family Vine–were the only contacts in her phone. 

Not having social media was kind of like having a phantom limb. Her fingers kept moving automatically to open some app or another, only for it not to be there. 

Grace searched local bookstores. 

Two hours later, an unknown number popped up on her phone, the ring startling her so badly she jumped. But it wasn’t Dean, whose number she still knew by heart, and she made herself calm down a second before answering.

“Hello?” she said as she packed her laptop up. The restaurant had started to empty and she hadn’t even noticed. 

“Hi, Ms. St. James?” a sweet, feminine voice said. “This is Karen Page at Nelson, Murdock, and Page?” 

Grace straightened excitedly in her seat. “Yes, speaking. How can I help you, Ms. Page?” 

“Hi! Matt was telling us about your informal interview this morning, and even though you were just here, the three of us would like to interview you together if you’re available.” There was a male voice in the background and a muffled laugh. Karen sighed almost imperceptibly. 

“Yes, yes of course! I, uh, I’m available anytime you are. Today, even.” She glanced at her phone and saw that it was nearing two o’clock already. 

“That would be great. Can you come around four-thirty? I know that’s short notice, but our last meetings of the day will be done by then so we have some time before closing.” Grace liked how warm Karen Page’s voice was. She also liked the idea of working with another woman–she’d feel safer with one there. Hopefully. 

“Four-thirty is great. You have no idea how much even getting an interview means to me.” Grace bit her lip, hard, to keep from gushing anymore. Was her luck really, truly turning around? Could it be so easy? So simple? 

“Great. See you soon, then.” As Karen hung up, Grace heard two men talking in the background and a loud laugh from Karen. 

“See you,” she said vaguely, unsure if Karen had even heard her. 

Grace hurried back to Ryan’s again to dump her stuff and maybe freshen up before her actual interview. She texted Jess and Ryan both to make sure it was okay that she came into the apartment and asked if the baby was sleeping. Jess responded that the baby was with her mother for the evening while they both worked in the restaurant, and that her car’s parking pass was on the table. 

And so, at four-thirty on the dot, Grace found herself knocking again on the door to Nelson, Murdock, and Page. 

It opened almost immediately, and a man with a little bit of a beer gut and brilliant smile greeted her. 

“Grace St. James!” he said excitedly, swiping his dirty blonde hair back. It was longer on top and shaved on the sides. He had a round, open face that immediately made her feel at ease. His eyes flickered to the bruise on her face and he briefly looked alarmed before he went back to smiling brightly. “I’m Foggy Nelson. Thanks for coming by again on such short notice. Come in, come in! Coffee? Tea? Uh…I think that’s all we have besides some questionable tap water. Matt! We need one of those water cooler things! What kind of law firm doesn’t have a water cooler?” 

Grace stepped inside as Foggy chattered happily at her. She stared at him, overwhelmed. He seemed like maybe he’d had too much coffee.

Matt Murdock appeared in the doorway to his office. His tinted glasses still obscured his eyes, but he wore a wide smile. He’d lost the suit jacket he’d been in that morning. His shirtsleeves were rolled up to the elbow. Okay, he really was good looking, Grace thought. 

“Foggy,” Matt said softly, “Let the poor woman breathe. How many cups of coffee have you had today, anyway?” 

“I’ve seen him have at least four, and I haven’t even been here all day,” said a familiar female voice. She was tall and blonde and beautiful. “Hi, Grace. Sorry about Foggy, he loves meeting new people.” She must be the Page portion of the firm. 

“Like a dog,” Foggy said with a laugh. “Also, probably seven. I didn’t get much sleep last night. Marci–”

Karen groaned as Matt said, “Foggy, I beg you, do not finish that sentence.” 

“I was just going to say she was snoring! She has a sinus infection! Get your mind out of the gutter, Murdock.” Foggy and Matt both laughed. Karen smiled at them and gave her a look that said, I know, right? 

Grace felt herself growing a little more at ease. What had Matt called it? Laid back? This was more than laid back–these people were…family. And she actually really liked it. 

“Sorry about them,” Karen said softly as she came to stand next to Grace. “I feel like I’m a third wheel all the time. Ouch,” she said, nodding towards the bruise on her face. “Looks painful. Hey, guys?” The last two words were louder and aimed at the still bickering friends. Grace didn’t miss how Karen didn’t ask about the bruise, and neither had Foggy. “Don’t we have a job interview to conduct?” 

Foggy froze then nodded. “Ah, yes. Job interviews. Karen, how did we interview you? Conference room?”

“I’m pretty sure I just kind of started working here,” Karen said with a laugh. “I don’t think I was interviewed.”

“I think the conference room is the only place with enough seats,” Matt said with a little tilt of his head. “Ms. St. James, if you don’t mind?” He gestured towards the room next to his office, which had a long table and four chairs. 

Grace was suddenly nervous despite the inviting atmosphere in the office. She nodded a little and went into the conference room, sitting in the seat farthest from the door. Foggy grabbed the chair next to hair and dragged it so three chairs would be facing her. She felt like she was about to go on trial. 

“Chair in the middle, bud,” Foggy said to Matt, whose hands felt around until he found the seat. All three seemed entirely at ease, while Grace thought she might throw up. She quickly pulled out two more resume copies and slid them across the table to Foggy and Karen. 

“Sorry,” she said towards Matt. “I tried to figure out how to print a Braille copy.” 

He made an odd face. Foggy beamed. 

“She was going to make you a Braille copy, Matt. I like her already!” Foggy winked at her, and she blushed. 

“Listen, Ms. St. James,” Matt started. 

“Grace,” she said. She made a face. “Ms. St. James is my mother.” All three of them smiled at her–Matt’s kind and reserved, Karen’s soft, Foggy’s wide and bright. 

“Grace,” Matt said with a nod. “You have a degree in communications from Cornell. Honestly, you seem a little…overqualified to work here.” 

“Um,” Grace said, even though she’d been expecting the question. “I mostly went there because of my boyfriend at the time. You can see there’s…a bit of a gap in my resume after I graduated. So I haven’t actually worked in that field…yet.” She almost winced. That sounded bad. She was already twenty-six. That meant she was four years out of college. Four years of not working a single job because Dean paid for everything. 

Pathetic. She was pathetic. Pathetic and spoiled, as Dean had told her before. 

Foggy shrugged. “Still. Great school. Seems like your grades were good too. Why work here?” 

Grace tried to subtly wipe her sweaty palms on her slacks. “Because, as I told Mr. Murdock this morning, I’ve recently had to start over. With everything. I need a job, any job. I’m kind of desperate. And someone said you guys have a reputation for helping people so…I figured it was a good place to start.” 

Karen and Foggy exchanged a look. The blonde raised an eyebrow. Foggy shrugged. Karen shrugged. Foggy then looked at Matt, who seemed to know he was being looked at because he dipped his chin. 

Grace was trying very hard not to panic. They were clearly communicating silently with each other, but she had no idea what was being said. Was it good? Bad? She couldn’t tell. 

“Well,” Foggy said as he leaned back in his seat. He smoothed his tie. “That was kind of our only question, because someone who went to Cornell seems way too smart to work here.” 

“We all went to Columbia Law,” Karen said with a small eyeroll. “Though Grace here probably is smarter than you two boneheads.” 

Foggy gasped and pressed a hand to his chest in mock affront. “You wound me, Karen!” 

Karen must have sensed Grace’s growing apprehension, because she said, “What he means to say is, Cornell was the only thing we’re curious about. As far as we’re concerned, the job is yours. We really are pretty desperate for some help around here, and you seem like a good fit.” 

Grace stared at her blankly for a long moment. “You’re giving me the job?” 

“Not exactly,” Matt said. Grace’s heart sank. Here it was. The other shoe dropping. “We actually want to hire you as an office manager. Not a secretary.” 

“And maybe a social media manager,” Karen added. “Because we don’t actually have social media. Or a website. So if either of those things are something you can do, we’d pay extra.” 

Grace’s heart was pounding wildly. She opened her mouth but absolutely no sound came out. 

“If you don’t accept, I really might cry,” Foggy said, voice still cheerful. “Matt obviously is no good at filing, and neither am I, and Karen’s too busy trying to show us up as a fancypants lawyer that I feel bad asking her to do any part of her old job.” 

Matt and Karen both laughed. “It’s true,” Karen said. 

“So…what do you think, Grace?” Matt said softly. She focused on him. Something about him settled her, calmed her. Her breathing eased and another little bit of tightness dissipated from her chest. 

“Yes, of course I want the job,” she said quickly. “And I can do a website, and create any kind of social media you want. I just–don’t want my name on it. Please.” 

“Ah, off the grid,” Foggy said sagely. “I see. Seems reasonable to me. As for pay, etc–” 

Foggy then outlined her pay, the vacation time, and the “shitty but at least we’ve got it” health coverage. 

Grace had to clench her fists hard to keep from crying in front of them. Her nails bit into her palms and the pain helped ground her. It was generous. Beyond generous. It wasn’t as much as some places might pay for, but she already was a little bit in love with how they treated each other and how kind they were to her. She loved the idea that they were flexible, that they helped people, that they were willing to take a shot on her despite her obvious lack of experience. 

“Thank you so much,” Grace said when Foggy declared the interview “officially over, thank God and all his saints or whatever Matt says.” They all stood and went out into the main waiting area of the office. 

“Please say you can start tomorrow,” Karen said softly, conspiratorially. “I’m in desperate need of another woman around here.” 

“I heard that!” Foggy said from where he was pouring another cup of coffee. “What about Marci?” 

“Marci’s great, but she doesn’t work here,” Karen said patiently. “Besides, she kind of scares me.” 

Foggy chuckled. “Me too,” he said. 

“Yeah, me too,” Matt said with a laugh. He tilted his chin down towards Grace. “Marci’s Foggy’s fiance. She’s a very important defense lawyer.” 

“And hot!” Foggy said. “Don’t forget that she’s hot.” 

Matt sighed good-naturedly. “Apparently she’s hot.” 

“Oh come on, Murdock–” 

“Don’t start with me, Foggy,” Matt threatened. Grace couldn’t see his eyes, but she could see the corners of them crinkle behind his glasses. 

Karen sighed and crossed her arms. “You guys are going to scare Grace away before she even starts.” 

Grace startled at her name. “No, no, I–It’s…fun. You weren’t kidding when you said it was laid back,” she said to Matt. 

“It’s a circus,” Karen said. “I would say it isn’t always like this, except it really is.” 

“Yeah,” Matt said with a raised eyebrow. “It really is. She’s not kidding.” 

“Well, that’s what happens when three best friends work together, right?” Grace said. She didn’t want to admit that she was soaking it all up. She had never been in such a happy atmosphere. Not since high school, when she used to go to Sunday night dinners with Ryan’s family. Hearing her three new bosses joke back and forth, the affection they held for each other crystal clear, made her want to work there all the more. “At least I won’t be bored, right?” 

“That’s the truth,” Foggy said. “Especially when we get paid in the occasional live chicken. Actually–got any experience catching chickens?” 

Grace stared at him, unsure if he was being serious or not. “I–Could probably figure it out.” 

“Foggy,” Matt said on a sigh. “Grace, let me walk you out. I’m heading home anyways.” 

Foggy coughed and said something under his breath that Matt clearly heard, because he sighed again. 

Matt gathered his jacket and a cane and then held out his elbow. “Come on, I’m getting you out of here before Foggy scares you off.” 

Grace laughed softly and took his arm. She wasn’t really sure how to lead a blind person–did he even need leading with a place so familiar to him? She didn’t want to ask, though, in case it was rude. 

Instead, as they descended the stairs, she said, “I really don’t think I can ever express how grateful I am.” 

Matt waved off her words with his free hand. “It’s nothing. You said we have a reputation for helping good people. That’s just what we do.” 

Grace swallowed hard. She wasn’t so sure she qualified as a good person. “Well, thanks all the same. Um–which way are you headed?” 

They stepped onto the street and Matt carefully stepped away from her. He wrapped both hands around the top of his cane and leaned into it. He pointed. 

“Oh. I’m headed the other direction. Thanks for walking me out. And the job.” She bit her lip, still feeling nervous.

“See you tomorrow, Grace,” he said after a moment. He smiled at her, so devastatingly charming that her heart stuttered a little. He was a man who knew he looked good, even though he couldn’t see himself. 

Dangerous, her mind whispered. Tempting, the rest of her said back. 

“Goodnight, Matt,” she said as she turned and walked off. 

She took a deep breath as she walked. She couldn’t believe she’d gotten the job. She’d gotten a good job. The pay was decent, the work was actually kind of relevant to her degree, and the office seemed like it’d be a lot of fun, if she let it. 

And, if she was being honest with herself as she thought about Matt Murdock’s easy smile and rolled up sleeves, the view wouldn’t be so bad either.

Next Chapter

taglist:

@zaminoo​ @thetrinitytest​

#matt murdock x oc #matt murdock x original female character #matt murdock x ofc #daredevil x oc #daredevil x ofc #daredevil fic #matt murdock fic #matt murdock #daredevil #netflix daredevil #saved #saved fic #saved daredevil #y'all I have nearly 45k of this fic written what is wRONG with me

[aboutanancientenquiry]

Ancient Egyptian Medicine and Health Inequality in Ancient Egypt

I reproduce below the abstract and the conclusions of the thesis of Samantha Rose Gonzalez  Examining Health Inequity in Ancient Egypt,  Missouri State University, July 2021, Master of Arts (supervisor: Julia Troche). On line source with the entirety of the thesis https://href.li/?https://bearworks.missouristate.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=4705&context=theses

  “ Abstract

This thesis explores the history of medicine in ancient Egypt between the Middle and New Kingdoms, and offers a case study highlighting the use of religion and magic in healing and analyzing health inequity. I am interested in medical practices, treatments, diagnosis methods, and access to healthcare in the ancient world. I seek to bridge the gaps and help unify the knowledge surrounding ancient Egyptian medical practices and contribute to the studies in the history of medicine. I explore types of diseases that commonly affected the ancient Egyptians and how they integrated religion and magic into their understanding and treatment of diseases. My main area of research focus is how hierarchical society influences health inequities in the ancient world and specifically focuses on women’s health in ancient Egypt. This thesis will demonstrate that there was differential access to healthcare in ancient Egypt based on gender and class. This thesis contextualizes medical texts within their broader roles in healthcare and utilizes an interdisciplinary approach to re-examine assumptions about medicine in the ancient world.”

“Conclusions

The primary objective of this thesis is to explore healthcare in ancient Egypt and analyze social and gendered health inequities, primarily in the Middle and New Kingdoms (i.e. the second millennium BCE), while drawing on earlier and later data in a supportive fashion. This serves to deepen current knowledge of the medicine of ancient Egypt and combine interdisciplinary approaches to this scholarship. In this thesis, the social mechanisms are used to explore religious and cultural influences on health and medicine in ancient Egyptian history. This thesis broadens the scholarship in history and Egyptology by providing a methodology for accessing healthcare, shining new light on religious and magical influences in medicine, and providing specific evidence for how medicine was perceived, maintained, and impacted ancient Egypt. The following discussion demonstrates how the specific research presented in the preceding pages contributes to our understanding of health inequities in ancient Egypt, to the broader research of medicine and its history, and to future scholarship on medicine in ancient Egypt.

Implications of this Research for Health in Ancient Egypt 

This thesis begins with four central research questions to explain how medicine was used in ancient Egypt: 

1. What did the ancient Egyptians believe caused illness, and how did they respond to disease? 

2. How was ancient Egyptian medicine intertwined with religion and magic? 

3. Who had access to healthcare in ancient Egypt? 

4. How were women’s health needs addressed in ancient Egypt?

The Introduction and Chapter 2 provide context, historiography and definitions integral to the discussion of medicine in antiquity. The first question is explored in the third and fourth chapters which examine the religious and natural causes of disease and how the Egyptians utilized both preventative and reactionary methods to illness and disease. The causative agents of disease originated from the natural and supernatural worlds which led to religious methods being utilized in medicine. The ancient Egyptian swnw used a practical method to examine their patient, diagnose their illness, and prescribe treatment. By first observing and taking the symptoms of the patient, the swnw would then examine the patient to find the most probable cause of the disease and then prescribe a remedy. In the documents from the ancient Egyptians, disease was caused by the gods, spirits, demons, or imbalances in the body. The restoration of ma’at could cure a person and restore good health. 

The second question, which seeks to better understand the relationship between medicine, magic, and religion is also considered in Chapters 3 and 4. Although most scholarship tends to separate religion, magic, and medicine, the ancient Egyptians embraced multiple forms of healing. It is clear that the ancient Egyptians did not have a strict separation between religion, magic, and medicine. Religious and magical methods were often employed along with practical methods for healing if appropriate, or these methods were used independently of each other. Heka, the use of magic, was invoked to protect people from spirits or demons that caused disease, often in the form of amulets or spells. Several gods of Egypt were used to invoke protection from illness and disease. One of the most common deities for protection was Bes, often protecting women and children. The gods could both protect and cause disease, so it was vital to appease the gods to help them fight off any health issues.

The last two questions both focus on health inequities. The third question focuses on social inequities and medicine and is the focus of Chapter 5, whereas Chapter 6 looks specifically at women’s health. Men and women had to face many of the same ailments or injuries in their environment, yet both of these groups faced their own unique stressors as well. Men worked more hard labor than women and were thus at higher risk for potential injuries and wear on the body. Women bore children and may not survive childbirth or infections. The sixth chapter discusses women and their health needs at length with the use of medical papyri as a main source of information. Women were treated differently than men in medicine with limited access to swnw at times. Fortunately, a great deal of medical papyri has survived that can shed some light on the illnesses and injuries that were common in ancient Egypt. However, the hierarchical system in ancient Egypt influenced the hierarchy amongst physicians and healers which caused a domino effect of healthcare across the land. The records or methods of local and rural healers are not as well known or documented as those that have survived. An interesting aspect in ancient Egypt is the level of sophistication and specialty amongst physicians and other types of healers. Over the course of ancient Egyptian history, their medical knowledge grew and left its influence over future medical traditions even to the modern-day.

Relevance to Broader Scholarship on Health in Ancient Egypt

Importantly, the research presented here has broad implications for Egyptological and historical scholarship on medicine. This thesis demonstrates health inequity in ancient Egypt by examining the hierarchical framework of society’s influence on the training of swnw and other healers and offers a unique, interdisciplinary methodology for approaching medicine and healthcare in antiquity. By first discussing the ancient Egyptian theory of disease transmission, it is apparent that they employed what we would categorize as both “scientific” and “religious” methods in their healing practices. Thus, any study of ancient Egyptian medicine must integrate theories and methodologies of religious studies and the history of medicine into their approach. Future studies must also acknowledge and reconcile the inequities in our evidence and the inequities of healthcare in antiquity.

Toward a History of Medicine 

This research is valuable towards developing a broader historical, archaeological, and Egyptological discussion of medicine in ancient Egypt. The healthcare system of ancient Egypt reflects its diversity and its cultural beliefs. The use of religion and magic in conjunction with medicine denies the previous notions of separating religious forms of healing from the more traditional (in the modern, Western conception) medical approaches.

My research demonstrates the health inequities present in ancient Egypt and pushes for further discussions and a reexamination of historical evidence with this diversity in mind. The healers of ancient Egypt from swnw to the priests of Sekhmet all held their own roles and limitations to healing. The social hierarchy in ancient Egypt permeated into the hierarchy among healers which caused different levels of care and access to healthcare. Future work should include translating all of the medical papyri to English, German, French and other languages if applicable, as well as creating online options of the hieroglyphs and transcriptions of the texts. Additionally, this research highlights the need to consider health and healthcare when examining past cultures. Just as in the modern-world, health is important to our daily life. Healthcare is structured by society, as it also structures society. Social networks were reinforced through taking care of the sick whether they were family members, friends, or neighbors. Indeed, medicine and healthcare are critical in understanding the social mechanisms behind survival.”

I found also this video with a presentation by Samantha Rose Gonzalez on the subject of health inequality in ancient Egypt.

#ancient egypt #egyptology #ancient egyptian medicine #medicine and magic in ancient egypt #samantha rose gonzalez

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January's crew - Page 39

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[arabicfornerds]

20 questions for: Mennan Salih (#33) The verb عَسعَسَ (to become dark) is Mennan Salih's favorite Arabic word. The author of the popular Arabic language blog "The Arabic Pages" recently began studying Akkadian, looking for similarities to Arabic. Learn more about her in episode #33 of the 9273-roots interview series. https://arabic-for-nerds.com/interviews/9273-roots/interview-mennan-salih-the-arabic-pages/?feed_id=4705

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[srbachchan]

DAY 4705

Jalsa, Mumbai                    Jan 16/17,  2021                  Sat/Sun 9:00 AM

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Birthday  EF - Ayush Mehta .. Siddharth EF .. Sunday, January 17 .. greetings and the flood of flowers for this special day .. love from all the Ef .. stay safe and protected .. ❤️❤️

To them the gratitude and love for the efforts they make in designing the face of the blogmaestr , a word I have been unable to find either a correct meaning or a correct spelling .. perhaps they that are proficient either in Latin or German may have some educative inputs ..🌹

But sincerely your affection is beyond description , and one has been so overwhelmed by the continuity of , not just the gibberish that comes out each evening, morning afternoon and night from this page, but the dedication with which each one of you have stayed with me all these four thousand seven hundred and five days .. 🥰🥰

It is to be understood that there must be some hasty impressions on other mediums that have a personal view-age for me on the ‘forgotton to press the post button’ or too ‘tired’ to get into that slumber mode .. or as the ‘breakings’ would have their warped way , to have ‘retired’ from all this caboodle ..!!🤪🤪 

But no, none of the prior is in its truest .. there was an explosion within the system .. one that sets you down in some reflective stage or shall we say onto a stage that has relentless capacity to just slump upon whatever is being said done or seen and be in unconcerned motives and intent to ‘do what the hell one wants to do , say what ever the hell one wants to say’ and ... YA ..  !!

You know what I mean .. 

Its those moments ..

BUT .. the morning is good and bright .. the warmth of the Mumbai sun, in its winter, is reflective of the temper of the Ef - ever accommodating, understanding & forgiving , towards this ‘ol man , who I have to admit has spent a rather disturbed night , getting up several times out of the bed, to get to the desk to write to give reason for this delay and seek forgiveness .. !! 🙏

The process of preparation for the next begins and in a few days there shall be back to the Studio details and visuals as the next operation work gets initiated .. a short appearance for friend and neighbour, Ajay and his film ; so far , carrying the title ‘May Day’ .. as the alarm code for a flight in distress, or in crash mode.

Then soon after a host of other shoots on line .. the details of which can only be discussed once they get on the floor of the house , which sounds so Parliamentary .. doesn’t it ?!

.. and work continues .. along with the anxiety of the pandemic, the course of action, the inoculation the effects and so on ..

.. but one has to give it all to humanity .. they always find a way out !

Yes the pandemic has been devastating , not just for those that fell ill , but for those unfortunate souls that found themselves without job, without work and without a living .. 

Somehow some of them fought it .. fought the virus, fought the circumstances, developed and designed other modes of existence and just continued to keep their heads and noses above the water levels .. 

They were and are true champions .. apart from those that came forward as true warriors , up front fighting for us not just at the borders protecting our sacred land , but those that risked life and living to save the lives and living of others .. other fellow humans .. 

Such pride .. 🙏🙏🌹

They found a way .. they decided not to give up in trying circumstances .. they just kept moving .. and moving on well .. finding other means of earning a living .. other means of keeping themselves and their families in wellness and safety ..

Staying confined to their homes or in the living has not been seen by many as a discomfort .. yes it is unnatural , but other modes have given hope to them and they have adjusted so beautifully .. despite all the encumbrances and the continuous informations of uncertainty and ill advised perceptions ..

We are human .. we live and breathe human .. and we honour and give pride to HUMANITY ..

Amitabh Bachchan 

[ao3feed-stucky]

by BeanieBaby

WARNING: Endgame Spoilers!

“You know, if you’d planned to come back as a legendary LGBTQ+ icon, you could’ve given us a heads up, Cap,” Sam says drily and shows him a Time magazine cover with their picture and the words The Original Kiss stamped across its page on his phone.

“Was it as awesome as it looked?” Bruce asks.

“Steve thumbs his lower lip thoughtfully and smiles, “Best kiss of my life."

(Post movie where Steve uses an extra vial of Pym Particle to go back to 1943 and shamelessly recreates the famous V-Day kiss with Bucky two years before it happens, Tony get all the love he should, and nobody dies, except Thanos that is.)

Words: 4705, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: Multi

Characters: James "Bucky" Barnes, Steve Rogers, Pepper Potts, Tony Stark, Loki (Marvel), Thor (Marvel), Sam Wilson (Marvel), Peggy Carter, Bruce Banner, T'Challa (Marvel), Shuri (Marvel), Peter Parker

Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Loki & Thor (Marvel), Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov, Nebula & Tony Stark, Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe) & Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Gamora/Peter Quill, Peter Quill & Rocket Raccoon

Additional Tags: Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Spoilers, Fix-It, no one dies, Sam Wilson vs Wakandan Jungle

#Bucky #AO3 works tagged 'James Barnes/Steve Rogers' #ao3feed #stucky #steve rogers #bucky barnes #c

[ao3feed-starmora]

And I think to myself (what a wonderful world)

read it on AO3 at http://bit.ly/2J7W7rd

by BeanieBaby

WARNING: Endgame Spoilers!

“You know, if you’d planned to come back as a legendary LGBTQ+ icon, you could’ve given us a heads up, Cap,” Sam says drily and shows him a Time magazine cover with their picture and the words The Original Kiss stamped across its page on his phone.

“Was it as awesome as it looked?” Bruce asks.

“Steve thumbs his lower lip thoughtfully and smiles, “Best kiss of my life."

(Post-movie where Steve uses an extra vial of Pym Particle to go back to 1943 and shamelessly recreates the famous V-Day kiss with Bucky two years before it happens, Tony get all the love he should, and nobody dies, except Thanos that is.)

Words: 4705, Chapters: 1/1, Language: English

Fandoms: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types, Thor (Movies), Captain America - All Media Types

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply

Categories: Multi

Characters: James "Bucky" Barnes, Steve Rogers, Pepper Potts, Tony Stark, Loki (Marvel), Thor (Marvel), Sam Wilson (Marvel), Peggy Carter, Bruce Banner, T'Challa (Marvel), Shuri (Marvel), Peter Parker

Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, Pepper Potts/Tony Stark, Loki & Thor (Marvel), Clint Barton & Natasha Romanov, Nebula & Tony Stark, Morgan Stark (Marvel Cinematic Universe) & Tony Stark, Peter Parker & Tony Stark, Gamora/Peter Quill, Peter Quill & Rocket Raccoon

Additional Tags: Post-Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Spoilers, Fix-It, no one dies, Sam Wilson vs Wakandan Jungle, Canon Divergence - Avengers: Endgame (Movie), Thor makes the snap

read it on AO3 at http://bit.ly/2J7W7rd

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Change My Mind: I Believe That The Islamic Scriptures Describe A Geocentric Flat Earth Model of the Universe

First off, I don’t really care if you’re one of those “scriptures should be taken metaphorically” people. I’m not trying to argue whether religious scriptures should be taken metaphorically, or if this or that proves Islam to be false. I’m only interested in the question of whether the text of the Islamic scriptures describes a geocentric flat earth model or something more scientifically accurate. 

This post is mainly targeting those who actually think that the Islamic scriptures are literally scientifically accurate, and that they describe the Earth being round. Bonus points if they also think that biological evolution is scientifically bogus. 

I would summarize the model of the universe in the Islamic scriptures as follows: That the Earth is flat. That the sun is a smaller-than-the-Earth hot sphere that passes through the Earth when it rises and sets. That the sun sets in a muddy pool or spring. That the sky you see above is a solid ceiling and is in fact the lowest heaven. That there are a number of layers of heavens above this lowest heaven, and that they are all physically, directionally above us. That God’s throne is physically above all the heavens. And that the stars/planets are little lamps affixed to the underside of the lowest heaven. 

Below is a list of Quranic and Hadithic verses, as proof for my claims. I think that there are other verses, but the ones below are the most telling. I shall include only verses form the Quran and the Kutub as-Sittah (traditionally regarded as the set of strongest Hadith by Sunni Muslims).

Quran (Yusuf Ali translation)

1.

Until, when he reached the setting of the sun, he found it set in a spring of murky water: Near it he found a People: We said: "O Zul-qarnain! (thou hast authority,) either to punish them, or to treat them with kindness.

~ Quran 18:86

2.

Until, when he came to the rising of the sun, he found it rising on a people for whom We had provided no covering protection against the sun.

~ Quran 18:90

The above 2 verses refer to the Quranic story of Zul-qarnain , whose story greatly resembles the mythic tale of the Syriac version of the Alexander Romance [1]. In the Romance, Alexander the Great travels to the place of the rising of the sun (page 148).

3.

We have indeed decked the lower heaven with beauty (in) the stars

~ Quran 37:6

4. 

Were they to see a piece of the sky falling (on them), they would (only) say: "Clouds gathered in heaps!"

~ Quran 52:44

5.

See they not what is before them and behind them, of the sky and the earth? If We wished, We could cause the earth to swallow them up, or cause a piece of the sky to fall upon them. Verily in this is a Sign for every devotee that turns to Allah (in repentance).

~ Quran 34:9

Hadith

6.

The Prophet asked me at sunset, "Do you know where the sun goes (at the time of sunset)?" I replied, "Allah and His Apostle know better." He said, "It goes (i.e. travels) till it prostrates Itself underneath the Throne and takes the permission to rise again, and it is permitted and then (a time will come when) it will be about to prostrate itself but its prostration will not be accepted, and it will ask permission to go on its course but it will not be permitted, but it will be ordered to return whence it has come and so it will rise in the west. And that is the interpretation of the Statement of Allah: "And the sun Runs its fixed course For a term (decreed). that is The Decree of (Allah) The Exalted in Might, The All-Knowing."

~ Bukhari 4:421

Sahih Muslim 1:297-300 are similar to the above.

7.

I was sitting behind the Messenger of Allah (ﷺ) who was riding a donkey while the sun was setting. He asked: Do you know where this sets ? I replied: Allah and his Apostle know best. He said: It sets in a spring of warm water (Hamiyah).

~ Abu Dawud 32:4002

8. 

Narated By Al-Abbas ibn AbdulMuttalib : I was sitting in al-Batha with a company among whom the Apostle of Allah (pbuh) was sitting, when a cloud passed above them. The Apostle of Allah (pbuh) looked at it and said: What do you call this? They said: Sahab. He said: And muzn? They said: And muzn. He said: And anan? They said: And anan. AbuDawud said: I am not quite confident about the word anan. He asked: Do you know the distance between Heaven and Earth? They replied: We do not know. He then said: The distance between them is seventy-one, seventy-two, or seventy-three years. The heaven which is above it is at a similar distance (going on till he counted seven heavens). Above the seventh heaven there is a sea, the distance between whose surface and bottom is like that between one heaven and the next. Above that there are eight mountain goats the distance between whose hoofs and haunches is like the distance between one heaven and the next. Then Allah, the Blessed and the Exalted, is above that.

~ Abu Dawud 35:4705

9.

Narrated Abu Huraira:

Allah's Messenger (ﷺ) (p.b.u.h) said, "Our Lord, the Blessed, the Superior, comes every night down on the nearest Heaven to us when the last third of the night remains, saying: "Is there anyone to invoke Me, so that I may respond to invocation? Is there anyone to ask Me, so that I may grant him his request? Is there anyone seeking My forgiveness, so that I may forgive him?"

~ Bukhari 19:1145

Anticipated Rebuttals

I shall deal with a few anticipated rebuttals in this section.

I.

This IslamQA article (118698: Consensus that the Earth is round) explains that the consensus among Muslim scholars is that the Earth is round, but as far as I can tell, it only gives this verse as evidence:

He created the heavens and earth for a true purpose; He wraps the night around the day and the day around the night

~ Quran 39:5

The above verse is however, vague. Even if this does hint at a round Earth model, it has to contend with all the other verses I’ve provided above

II.

 This IslamQA article (88746: The hadeeth of the mountain goats is a weak hadeeth) deals with the verse I’ve put under the numbered heading, “8″. The article gives proof that the Hadith verse is weak in authenticity. 

Even if it follows that the Hadith is weak, there are too many other verses that point towards the erroneous model. Some of these verses are from the Quran, which is seen as infallible. Also, as will be seen below in “III”, IslamQA could not dispute the authenticity of one of the Hadith verses under “6”.

I will also ignore the little bit at the end of this IslamQA article, appearing to show that the writer disbelieves in God’s omnipresence (this runs counter to many other Sunni Muslims’ beliefs, I think), instead arguing that God is indeed directionally “above all creation”.  

III.

This IslamQA article (176375: The correct way to describe the sun is that it “prostrates beneath the Throne” and not that it “sets in a spring of warm water”) argues that because we know the world is round, we cannot possibly tell what the Hadith is really about. The problem is that this argument can be used to dismiss any errors that may turn up in religious scriptures.

Footnote

[1] Syriac version of the Alexander Romance (page 148)

So the whole camp mounted, and Alexander and his troops went up between the foetid sea and the bright sea to the place where the sun enters the window of heaven ; for the sun is the servant of the Lord, and neither by night nor by day does he cease from his travelling. The place of his rising is over the sea, and the people who dwell there, when he is about to rise, flee away and hide themselves in the sea, that they be not burnt by his rays ; and he passes through the midst of the heavens to the place where he enters the window of heaven ; and wherever he passes there are terrible mountains, and those who dwell there have caves hollowed out in the rocks, and as soon as they see the sun passing [over them], men and birds flee away from before him and hide in the caves, for rocks are rent by his blazing heat and fall down, and whether they be men or beasts, as soon as the stones touch them they are consumed. And when the sun enters the window of heaven, he straightway bows down and makes obeisance before God his Creator ; and he travels and descends the whole night through the heavens, until at length he finds himself where he rises.

There are other clues that point to the Quranic Zul-qarnain being derivative of the Alexander Romance, which are the inclusion of Gog and Magog, and the reference to Alexander as the “two-horned one” in the Romance, which translates to “ Zul-qarnain”.

#islam #quran #hadith #flat earth #geocentrism

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