#skuldugggery | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

neotericbitch · 3 years

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something very unpolished but i know i cannot do any more with it, so here

When Valkyrie came down for breakfast, Skulduggery was sitting at the dining table reading the newspaper. He also had his phone out and open, playing a radio broadcast that she didn’t get time to identify before he turned it down and then off to accommodate her morning routine. Xena was already there with him but being an early bird didn’t seem to be catching her many worms, and she sat under the table with her head resting woefully on Skulduggery’s knee.

Things were normal.

He said, “Good morning.”

“Morning.”

“How are you?”

“Yeah, alright. Slept through, mostly. I know I was having weird dreams but I don’t remember what about.”

“Nothing to call the doctor over.”

She smiled. “No.”

Minutes passed.

Skulduggery then asked, without looking up from the paper, “And how are the Faceless Ones feeling today?”

Valkyrie rolled her eyes. “Fine, I imagine.”

He looked up now. “You imagine?”

“What, you think we’re chatting all day every day or something?”

“Oh,” with a jump to his voice. “Forgive my presumption. I just thought, with them being your new best friends and all…” He turned his wrist somewhat dismissively like it ain’t no thang and returned to the newspaper.

In a light tone that indicated she didn’t feel she really needed to say this, she said, “You’re my best friend.”

“Hm.” He turned the page. “That mustn’t net you a lot of points.”

“They don’t mind.” Trying to be jovial, “You’re on the safe list.”

“Ah, so they do talk about me. Do they have anything interesting to say? If it’s anything negative I fully expect you to take my side.”

“All the time.”

“Defend my good name,” he went on.

“Yeah.”

“But don’t fret about my feelings. If they have anything to say, even if it will upset me terribly, you must pass on the message.”

“No prob.”

“And if I–”

She held out her hand. “Let me stop you there.”

“Yes?”

“I just want you to stop.”

“Oh.”

Valkyrie ate her breakfast. Skulduggery sat there looking at her. It was quiet but for Xena repositioning over to Valkyrie’s end of the table, occasionally thumping her tail against the floor in the vain hope for a crumb.

“I don’t think that–”

“I wish you wouldn’t–“

They both stopped. Skulduggery offered his hand.

“Go on.”

Valkyrie considered it but shook her head. “No, you go. Could be an apology.”

He said nothing for a moment. “It’s not.”

“Okay, then I’ll say my thing. I just want to sit here and eat my toast and have a nice quiet morning, and you’re over there being a dick for no reason.”

“No, I'm not.”

“Bloody… Asking about the Faceless Ones for no reason, talking to me like I’m conspiring with them, like they’re here right now. Or like I’m bugged, like I’m different and bad, and I’m just sick of it.” Valkyrie put her hands flat on the table. “It reminds me of Darquesse and...that.”

“Right,” said Skulduggery. “And what was that, would you remind me? You forged ahead thinking you had it under control and then…?”

“Yo.” She scoffed and stood, pointing an accusing finger. “I get that you’re feeling threatened so you’re lashing out, but I don’t appreciate it and I don’t have to put up with it. Not while I’ve got the embrace of the Faceless Ones, turning me evil as you like to think.”

She got up and went out, only stopping before the doorway to turn her head back and announce, “And they don’t have shit to say about you, because you’re irrelevant. Because they’re here already, they won, so who cares about you?”

Very shortly afterwards he found her sitting on the back step. He sat down beside her and she said feebly, “I care. Of course I do. I love you but it hurts that you’re not accepting reality. The Faceless Ones are here and that’s that, there’s nothing wrong. They don’t hurt me and they don’t want to make me do anything. I can just love them.”

“Can they love you back?”

Frustratedly, “Yes.”

“Are there any here now?”

Valkyrie stopped. Checked around. Looked at him. “Nope.” Gave a squint and a faint smile, like issuing a challenge. “Think you can convince me to snap out of it because of that?”

“I was hoping so.”

The smile bloomed into a grin and she wiped the heel of her palm across her eyes. “You’re ridiculous.”

“I suppose I am.”

“Look, I’m sorry for yelling and everything. But it just, it hurts when you act like that, you know?”

“I know. And I’m sorry for what I said, it was cruel. You’ve always tried to do what you think is best and that’s something to be admired, not shamed.”

“Thanks. Not such a blasphemous heathen after all.”

Skulduggery took her hands into his and gave them a squeeze. “I don’t follow them, but I’ll always follow you. Even while you’re following them.” After a pause, he set them down on her knees. “Which is still going in their direction, but that’s not important.”

“Well, whatever, directions don’t matter anyway. Cause it’s really just you and me, no one in between,” Valkyrie said. “Not even gods.”

“Until the end.”

“And when I say just, I mean that in a healthy way, like, not as in an abusive ‘no one else would have you’ way.”

“No, of course not.”

“In a way that means like, we’re totally together, through thick and thin, no matter what, including saying mean things and having relationships with third parties.”

“Thank you for clarifying even though I obviously knew that was what you meant.”

She smiled and kissed him. He put his arms around her. They stayed happily like that for a minute, then Valkyrie saw something behind Skulduggery.

“Oh shit.” She ducked her head in embarrassment. “There’s one coming over.”

Skulduggery turned even though he knew he wasn’t going to see anything.

“Christ, it’s coming right this way.”

“Do you think it saw?” He leaned into her ear and murmured conspiratorially, “Do you think it’s heading over to scold you for kissing the irrelevant skeleton?”

“No,” Valkyrie said but clearly doubted it.

“This might be it. The moment where you must make the ultimate decision. You can no longer have both, Valkyrie. It’s going to ask you to choose. Them or me, what’s it going to be?”

She shoved him, giggling and trying to be very serious at the same time. “Shush!”

She looked up into the sky for a time, struggling to keep a straight face as she paid attention to whatever it was being brought to her. Skulduggery poked her in the ribs and pinched her and generally did not offer any acknowledgement or respect to the Faceless One. But he could feel it. It was there. A heavy presence that knew not the fine art of humour, and most certainly didn’t know love either. It put an ache in his bones.

Skuldugggery was down in the basement with Cadaver later.

“Now, if you want my advice–“

“I don’t.”

“When your significant other finds religion–“

“Be quiet.”

“It’s often helpful to do the same. I can give you some recommendations if you like. The Viddu De are growing in popularity, from what I hear. Oh yes, lots to hear about them.”

“I'm also hearing things.”

“Is it me still talking after you told me to stop? Your predictability has grown stale, surprise me for once.”

“Actually I really was going to tell you what I’ve been hearing about them. Maybe even from them. I think I’m beginning down the road you’re on, Cadaver.”

“I’ll give you credit for the effort but I know the ending to this one, too. I’m supposed to gormlessly say really so you can say no and tell me to be quiet again. You may be on the road but you are many steps behind. Now this is the part where you try to outwit me again.”

“Actually this is the part where I take your head off,” said Skulduggery, and did so, and put it in a thick trunk so he didn’t have to listen to Cadaver complain.

#sometimes you just feel out a concept and leave it and that's what this is. i'd like to share it if that's ok #i've got some pages of something else that's similar but not really but also yes that i might work more on or might not

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